THESE GUYS! - Jeff Saturday's eyeliner

Episode Date: February 11, 2026

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I cried to one of your songs in my car one time. Dude, I used to listen to you when I ran around the neighborhood and I almost got hit by a car, but like, yeah. Did you tell them that? Yeah, you know how you see somebody. You just tell them everything, you know? The old nervous talk. Oh, my.

Talk on the red carpet. With the dapp. Oh, my God. I was saying it all. Just being way too honest. Every time I said something, I was like, why did I say that? Oh, well. Not bad for a fat guy.

TG 172. Live from Coach Pee's. Coach peace crib. We're here. I like your pants. I never see your pants. Thanks, bro. Christmas.

Really? Yeah. Big, big purchase. Really, really like them. Oh, was a Christmas gift for yourself? Mm-hmm.

Nice. One of those. Yeah, you just, I don't know. Feels good. Where are they from? No free hats.

Ah. Yeah. Nice. Nice. Feels good. Do they have a brick and mortar? Brick and mortar? I think they do

But it's always like open for like two hours Yeah once a week At different times kind of Like open like a bank You have to just know You have to just know Yeah they let me in the back sometimes You ever see a store

And there's just like a line wrapped around it And you're just like what could they possibly be selling I actually did In San Francisco I saw a tea store A tea a tea shop Like what do they make Like customized ones People die for that stuff

But they had a line outside Wrapped around Last time I was in a line like that Dude Lids outlet Take me back to those days Please Last time I was on a line like that A candy store in New York

That was all over TikTok What kind of candy? Just shit that you put on TikTok You know A bunch of influencers types That were all lined up Like fruity candy or like I think they had a little bit of chocolate

it, but yeah, it was mostly like, kind of like sour gummies and Swedish stuff. Yeah. It was fine. I mean, I, you know, me, I'm a bitch for candy. So me and my dad saw it and it was like. Got to hop in line. Sometimes you just got to get in line. And really, those places are smart because it's not so much that there was that much of a line.

It's just that there's those, those, the brick and mortars, the storefronts are like the size of a closet. Yeah. So quite literally only like three people can be in there at a time. That's wild, because I always see candy stores, like, in the mall, and I'm like, who's buying this? You know, like, it's just, like, next to a jeweler, and you're like, why would anybody just buy, like, a solo piece of coconut chocolate? Like, I've never been like, man, I could really, you know, you're in the mall.

Like, I've never been, like, but a piece of chocolate right now. I could do a piece of gummy. A little gummy? Yeah. Like one single sour patch blue raspberry guy, I'd be like, you know what? much as that eight bucks. Sure. And there's something special about those candy stores where you hop in there and you

get a little white bag. You get the little white bag. Oh, the one where you go in there and there's a bunch of bins. And you bend it up. Always wanted to work there. Oh, man. Because like three people come in every four days and you're just like sitting there

with Sour Punch straws. Who's going to know if I take down a whole bucket? Dude, if I worked there, me the whole time. teeth and rotten. You know that chew when you have a gummy candy? Getting a jaw workout. There's a red sweetest fish on the back of your wisdom tooth for like four days. Hey, a lot of this, a lot of a lot of.

Uh-huh. This every time you're not on the clock. Yeah, that's my boyfriend. You're getting introduced. It's by your girlfriend to her uncle and shit. You're at their house. I saw her. it's the same tooth dude

I saw I grew up I got like snags on it I was always doing that when I was growing up to my mom would always get so mad like I'd eat like crackers and then for the next like two hours I'd be like this

oh I hate the dig I hate my mom would smack my hand out of my mouth I'd be like there's peanut butter crackers back there I gotta eat them nuts and then people make a sport of it dude people are like people are like digging back there and then they'll literally go

Oh my God. I think that's me. That is so gross. I think that's me like by myself. But I'll forget and I'll probably, I would probably do it around you on accident. I'm like, if you can dig it out of there with your tongue and just like, dig it out and then you got to swallow it.

Cool. Just right in front of everybody, just picking, digging with your finger and then just making a show of it. Dude, it's putting on a clinic over there. What are we doing, man? All peanut butter chops. It's with everything, man. You're sharing.

tips of somebody, right? Like you're hanging out with the fellas. There's like a bag of Doritos going around, right? Yeah. Smash them Doritos. And all of a sudden, they're over there. Uh-huh. All right.

Cool ranch. Uh-huh. Chill out. Talk to him. Uh-huh. All right. So, what?

Oh, I hate it. Oh, it drives me nuts. Just packing on the back of that tooth. How do we not just have cavities 257? Yeah, I was thinking about that because whenever I fly, I just become, I have to, I have to have some like gummy candy. How do you not?

Every time you walk through an airport, what did you get at the airport when you went to the Super Bowl? Oh, so actually. Give me all the stats. So actually, I didn't get anything on the way out and I really regretted it. I was sitting there. On the way out of the airport or the way out of the airport?

On the way out to San Francisco. Because it was like our fly was at like 9.30 and I don't know. So I think I got a cough and then, but I didn't get any candy or anything. And then like 30 minutes into the flight, I'm watching the Godfather. And I was like, damn, you could really go for some right now. Yep. So then we get out there and it's, it's, it's, let's see, I'm trying to do the math.

It cares. But anyways, I hadn't eaten all day. And so as soon as we get to the San Francisco airport, I'm like, I got to run. And I got to make a stop. Make a stop right away. Get the extremes Sour Patch Kids. Sour Patch Kids extremes. in the purple tropical skittles.

Two. Share size bag. I had to. Two of them. Was walking around, was walking around the San Francisco airport going to the baggage claim. Guys got a rattle. Saw Urban Meyer.

No way. First guy I saw. Did he have his glasses down like this? Was he at a bar? AirPods in and sweatsuit. I was like, yep. What kind of sweatsuit? It's like when you think of Urban Meyer on a Saturday morning.

Just all red says Ohio State. it. It was actually the same version of Brutus Buckeye just in like people version, you know. You didn't have the head on, but exactly what Brutus Buckeye wears. It's going on. Yeah, just casual. I thought it slipped something on for the airport fit, you know, it's whatever. So that was, I was on the way there.

So I'm going, you know, we're riding through downtown San Francisco going to our spa and I got my candy. Then when we're coming back out to Indie, we get to the airport and I get Snickers becon. God, dude. So you were kind of sad at this point, maybe. Yeah. The sad candy. Snickers pecan. Very, berry, very, very, very, very worms, sour gummy worms.

And can't go wrong with Barry. Blue nerds clusters. Three. Oh, you're down bad. Well, we, it was one of those where we, our flight was at 4.30 or something, San Francisco time. Mm-hmm. So we woke up and like we had nothing to do all day, right? like we're just killing time.

So we got to the airport at like one. Oh, wow. Thank you. Wow. No, no. Crazy. Because I was set, dude, trying to set. Oh, my God.

Trying to set a cup. You just take the out. Trying to set the cup on an ottoman? You're like, is this a, is this a temperedic mattress commercial? You know, and they put the glass on the bed? And throw the bowling ball on it. I'm like, guys.

I know it's 3 a.m. And I shouldn't be up. There's no way. I know it's 3 a.m. And I'm watching an MXC on. Spike TV. What was MXE? It was that,

the game show? The Asian game show where they would dub over the lip, dub it over in English. What a lazy show, but everybody's watching it. Oh my God, insane. That was,

no, that was, that was some early info of comedy, right? That was so funny. Mm-hmm. Because you knew all the people that were, you knew that it was an actual game show that

is over in Asia. And then we just took it. And then people were like, yeah, we're going to dub over this in a pretty offensive way. but we're going to just say whatever the hell we want. MXC, what do that stand for? Most extreme competition or something like that.

It's just the easiest name ever. Yeah, whatever. You know they bought it for like 15 bucks too. Oh, yeah. You want this whole series? Yeah, 15 bucks. We'll take it out, dude, where they run across the rocks and the water.

Fall immediately. I feel like I only watched that for like 14 seconds and then changed it. Like I was like, oh my God. Try to find the actual thing I'm trying to watch now. I was locked down. That was so funny. How are the Grammys? Pretty wild.

Pretty big deal. Saw a bunch of people. A lot of waiting around and then... Those carpets are weird, man. Like, it's an interesting game. Yeah. Kind of nervous. Kind of...

Just anybody would just walk through there. Yeah, it was good, though. Saw a lot of people. Dude, the thing was, like, where I was posted up with Billboard, they had like a spotter, and she was so nasty. Oh, nice. She was a hawk. Yeah. I've never met anybody that just knew, hey, that's Lincoln Park down there.

I can see the lead singer. Like, it was just amazing. That's Paris Hilton right there. Eyes on Paris Hilton. She did, she was, I was like, are you in the CIA? Yeah. Dude, I've never had somebody that she knew every single celebrity. They could have been wearing a mask.

She'd have been like, that's that guy. I was like, oh, my God, you're so valuable. MVP. Would she kind of like lead them over to you? Oh, yeah. She had it down. She was like, you guys want to boom, boom. They'd be like, yeah, for sure.

Bang. And we'd just be, we're just churning them out. It was good. Nice. You see Sabrina Carpenter? No, some of the big dogs don't like do the press. They do the pictures. Everybody does the pictures, but they don't come and, oh my God, right.

Right. So, like, I think this is going to win. album in the years. I don't really. But some people do just because they want to like I don't know get all over the place. Yeah. That's like at the Kentucky Derby, my homes didn't. He walked it, but him and his wife didn't do any media. Yeah.

I was sitting there and I was trying. One day, bro. Yeah. Taylor Swift? Nah, she ain't. I don't think she's done press in 20 years. Yeah. But didn't even see her like? No. I don't even know she was there. Oh, she probably wasn't.

Yeah. But yeah, the big dog stay in the room with just the picks and then some of them come off in their reviews but it was good saw Kevin Gates almost cried nice just dapped him up like nine times because I was nervous yeah bro yeah cool cool cool dude I love it for real cool cool cool cool he was like I love you too and I was like oh my god I cried to one of your songs in my car one time

dude I used to listen to you when I ran around the neighborhood and I almost got hit by a car but like yeah Did you tell them that? Yeah, you know how you see somebody. You just tell them everything, you know. The old nervous talk. Oh, my. Talk on the red carpet.

With the Dap. Oh, my God. I was saying it all. Just being way too honest. Every time I said something, I was like, why did I say that? Oh, well. Yeah. I was getting ready to walk the blue carpet for Fandle.

And they're like, hold on just a second. We're going to, we have someone else coming. I was like, okay. Yeah, I don't care. And tire banks just strolls right by. And I was like, oh, wow. You see anything? Very tall.

No. You just smell. I was too spooked. It was crazy. She was like four inches taller than me. Oh, God. Yeah. I was like, are you levitating or what is happening?

Can you kiss the top of my head? Yeah, that's insane when you see somebody like that. I tried to get a picture with Paris Hilton. She walked right by my bitch ass. I was like. Yeah, but she got you with the repost. Right. Yeah.

But I was like, hey, can we get a picture? Like two minutes after it all ended. I was like, I should get a picture with her on second thought. Didn't even bat an eye. I was like, there we go. That's what I'm talking about. I need that. For sure.

What else? What else? Oh, dude, Ted Karras keeps trying to come on her show. This show? Yeah. Like Ted Karras the coach or Ted Karras the player? Oh, no way. Oh my God.

Every time I see him. Teddy Kierrez. Every time I see him, that's who I was with on Friday night on San Francisco. He's doing this little dive bar thing. And I go out there and first thing, bro, I got to get on with you in Politi. Can you in police? Can we do that? Come on.

Come on. Come on. I'm like, yeah, dude. Come on. Let's go. And, but yeah. We got to try to make that happen. He's like, come out to Cincinnati.

We'll do it. Come on. You and policy, man. Like, all right. Yeah. So, I'm all down. So down. Anyways.

Is it spring break? I know. Why is there still snow here? For a week, I've been like, there's still snow here. It hasn't even been cold. But now, now it's like, I looked at my car this morning when I was driving my daughter to my sisters. And it said 47 and the sun was out. And I was like, yeah, it feels damn good.

Turn on the Mac Miller, dude. Turn on the Gorilla's O. It's time. Like 47 with sunshine, man. Get the chairs outside. Is Georgetown playing? Is Lehigh playing Duke? What's the most?

What's the most spring break day? What's the most spring break? What's the most dardy basketball game? Who's playing when it's, oh, I got it. When it's 54 degrees, but the sun is bright and it feels like it's 72 because it's that first day that it's felt like that.

And you're outside. Who's playing? That first day wakes you up. I don't have one on the first day, but I have a peak spring break game. Okay, that's fine. That was happening. That'll do. Peak spring break.

Oh, so this is an actual game. Yeah. Okay. Everybody's in the like penthouse. We get the penthouse one year. There's like 20 people throw in. Wow. It's just like just.

Yeah. It's the craziest trip ever. And no one's talking in Yukon and Kentucky are on TV. I think it's that one game where Kimball Walker hits that like step back. Were they playing Kentucky? No, that was a big East tournament. Oh, well. I'm going to get out here.

TG 172. Come on, you know this. It was a Madison Square Garden. I didn't know that. Step back. Cardiac Kimba. It was that. It was that.

I guess our spring break was a week early. What's funny is I was going to say that same thing. I was going to say some big East game, probably like Georgetown, Syracuse. Georgetown, Syracuse. Two teams that just aren't ever going to win. Ooh, ooh. Actually, here's a sleeper one. Here's a sleeper one.

NC State Duke in the ACC tournament in Charlotte. It's like, you know, because NC State's kind of like, I don't have to maybe. Yeah, they've got a lot of good wins. Solid team. Maybe like they could be peeking at the right time. I got that one guy. They got that one guy from the corner. And Charlotte, I feel like they're always playing in like the middle of the day in the ACC

tournament. Yeah. They have no night games of the ACC. 4 p.m. Tip. Not even 4 p.m. Noon. Yeah.

Right when you wake up. Duke's on. Yeah. People in the crowd. It's like, and the broadcasters are never like, well, actually, yeah,

it's usually like Dickey B, but I was thinking of that Mike Patrick fella. Big East tourney. God, I love the court for the Big East tourney. Mm-hmm. You go,

you go. Kind of excited for March Madness. That's, dude, weather. That's what I'm saying. Like the sun feeling so good. Got some birds. I was walking my daughter out to the car this morning. Birds were chirping. Dude, birds make it. Birds were chirping. The sun was out. I felt it. I was like, we got a little hope eternal. Hope spring eternal. Should I feel out of braggie? Joe LaNardi, what's up? What's good. Joe's going.

That's good. What's good. Yeah, I just saw Jeff Saturday on TV. What a good looking guy now. Jeff Saturday. See, we're an eyeliner. Jeff Saturday and Derek Carr You guys wear an eyeliner Jeff Saturday Derrick Carr Youngblood Oh yeah

What a demon But these guys are They're throwing a little eyeliner on Like for the glam Before they get on Hey can you touch me up a little bit And they like keep it on the low

So like Stephen A Smith doesn't hear There's no way that it's that You're too hot Naturally God every mom Love Jeff Saturday He knows too He knows they do

Every mom loved Jeff Saturday Just pretending that they don't Every mom now too Loves Drake May What's up with that? I don't see it Not my QB Not my QB

Not not really my QB I respect him But like I don't know It's just something about his helmet I'm just I can't get behind it You do one thing with your equipment I'm out

Weird helmet Baggy sleeves throws weird he throws weird she's not that special to me and I'm not saying that because he lost he was like the best quarterback in the end I know but I'm just like there's just not the thing

that I'm looking for there not a sports podcast it's kind of we're doing a good job of beating around because I don't know what it is like the thing that he lacks if this was a sports podcast I'd be able to tell you but like it's just something about the vibe the vibes are off on May

I think you said it. I think it's the helmet and the sleeves. Yeah. And he kind of throws disjointed. Like it's not smooth. Like we're just watching Caleb Williams up there and it's like, uh, Drake May,

there's kind of like a little weird shoulder hitch. I don't know. Not a sports podcast. It doesn't matter. He's doing very well. Everybody loves him. But no, I can't get behind it.

It's a tangent. It's a, whatever. It's a tangent. So. Sam Darnold. There's something about. him that I like.

Colin Cowherd loves him. There's just something. He's got something and I can't explain it and I like it. I think that's how everybody feels. Drake May, I'm just like, it's not, he needs to like come out to the media and say something. And I'll be like, okay, there it. Like, there it is. But I just like, I don't know.

Come from a guy that doesn't know anything. They don't know anything. No. So you guys that don't know anything. Don't know anything. Don't want to know anything. At the AJ and Big Justice. I'll say at the Super Bowl.

That was wild. People weren't excited about it. Yeah, they really fell off. What happened to the boom guys? I thought it was- The Costco guys fell off. Well, like, I thought it was just like a fun, like, oh my God, wow. And then I don't know, people on Instagram weren't feeling it. But I thought it was funny.

People there? No, that's the thing. They were hype. Oh, dude, they were the biggest celebrities there. Like on Radio Row, the media, like, center at the Super Bowl. Bro, like Emmett Smith would walk by, Devon Hester, nobody gives a shit. The Costco guys

Align. A line to get in, to talk to him. I like him. Yeah, they were, I mean, they were like as advertised. The whole thing, all the energy. Yeah. Did the booms, did it all. Big justice.

His voice. I love a dude that just hasn't. His voice is going to change and everything. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But what's crazy is that like it has a, I'm like, are you just staying the same age? You've been the same age with the same age with the same voice for like four years now.

He's a permanent seventh grader. Is he in seventh grader? I don't know. I don't know. But yeah, I'm just like trying to like think through all a different shit that I saw over this past weekend. San Fran was cool. Anyways. Cool, cool, coo, cahoo.

Didn't see cahoot. Talk is Hagan. Now local podcast. Third hair transplant went well. Yeah? Awake the whole time. You just got into that point where it just doesn't even affect you. They're just like, we're going to keep you awake.

And I was like, are you sure you can do that? Just felt them punching holes in the top of my head. I was like, all. Am I supposed to feel? Are you sure I'm supposed to be awake every second? It hurt? Not at all. Don't look at it, but not at all.

Yeah, I don't want to. Two different people out in San Fran. Where's Johnson? I was like, man, he's got like salami on his head. I don't know. Old salami head. My head looks like the war. War wound.

I did joke about the other few people. I was like, yeah, biggest week in sports, sports media, and he goes away from it to get his hair transfer. I never, I can never see the vision of the dates, man. They're like February 4th. I'm like, sounds good to me. What the hell could be happening then? Super Bowl week.

Never know. Like, anytime I'm planning anything, I'm like, there's no chance anything's happening that week. Oh, shit. All right. NFL draft. All right. It's the end of April.

72 days. It's the end of April. 74 days. 72 days, I think. You know. You know for a fact. All right, let's get to the clubhouse. These guys at gmail.com.

com.com. From Chris, iconic names are a thing. Boys by Boys, first time, semi-long time. Absolutely love the show. Don't ever stop. You guys remember dudes that just had the name. Growing up in Myrtle Beach, I was a dedicated surfer

and also played soccer as I never hit the final growth spur to propel my dream of playing basketball in the NBA. Anyway, one of my mentors and best friends during that time was this dude that was just the coolest guy. Best surfer in town by far, ripping it out in the water,

doing huge turns and boosting the sickest airs. Boosting air. I always wanted to say that. One time I actually saw him do an Ollie over our buddy Eric right after he pulled out of the sick barrel on a hurricane swell at Springmate Pier. An Ollie, boys. You have to...

Bro, this is a good... This is crazy. Demo. Like he was skating down the street. So wild. Hopefully I haven't lost you guys in the lingo. To stay with me. I mean, kind of.

Like, I've heard of these things. I can't envision them. I feel like I'm watching rocket power. Right. On top of that, he had the name, Lynn Chambers, L-Y-N. As soon as the threat in and out of the water, had the hottest chick, sickest truck. Threat.

Full-on redneck that could do anything athletically and also charm your ass into doing anything. I should mention what prompted this writing was a bit from the show a couple weeks ago. Ben mentioned getting an ass-wipping by some team in a scrimmage game. All I remember was Matt Exley. Drew. Drew Exley. Drew Exley.

The name. Guarantee that guy is a commercial real estate agent at the absolute top of his game right now while I'm writing emails about him plus Lynn Chambers. I hate them both. Love you guys and keep ripping it weekly for the boys and the burpees. P.S. World Cup is coming. So check out what I found looking for a throwback lifestyle soccer gear.

All right. Not a soccer podcast? Sent a link. Reebok taking forever to load. Come on Coach Pete's Wi-Fi. It's going Style soccer Last thing to load

Of course it is We'll get there Bro, but the name Lynn Chambers That old Reebok Um Old Reebok Reebok was nice

Before they went I like him as an alternate Before they went like all What do they do now? CrossFit They went all in on CrossFit Never heard of them again Yeah

Oh, let's see. You didn't send a link. I think it's just like the, I think it's just like the, oh. That could be kind of nice. I don't know. It's just like the first page of all the Reebok stuff, but there is some nice stuff on there.

It's all about the name, dude. You got a good name. Really all that matters. Can we talk about the name Jerry Stackhouse for a minute? Saw that the other day and I was like, are we, are we just, I don't know. Glossing over that a little bit.

Are we just pretend? that's not Jerry Stack. His last name is Stackhouse and it's on a jersey. And we're not buying all those. Pistons Stackhouse Teal. Stackhouse is his name. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Good Lord. Yeah. I mean, that's why that's why that, you know, actors and musicians and whatnot, like change their name to something because the name is, the name is key. Mm-hmm. One name.

When people just have one name, that's when you know. Like if Leonardo DiCaprio's, name was Larry Davis. It's not a bad name either. It's a pretty good name. Larry Davis, pretty simple. Larry Davis isn't the star on a movie billboard. Larry Davis is like the four you bring off the bench. He's going to crash the boards.

Larry Davis with another. No, Larry Davis is like the fifth hole hitter that probably hits like 208 strikes out like 200 times, but we'll just hit like 32 jacks that go 460. feet. That's Larry Davis. We might need like a March Madness bracket for names. We do talk about names a lot. Oh my God. I mean, it's

dominates my brain. Jeff Saturday. You know? His last name is just Saturday. You never met anybody with that. You're never going to forget him. All the other Coltsill linemen, who are the best day of the week? That's what's your last name? Saturday?

Blessed. Jeff Saturday. Your first name could be anything. Saturday's Carian. Hey, Rakeem Christmas. Christmas Jersey? Insane. Yeah. It's my buddy. What's his name? Robbie Halloween. What? Robbie Halloween? Can you imagine? Yeah, dude, when people like Denzel Valentine. God dang it, man. So many things you can play with that. Everything about your game, you know, a little bit of love, a little bit of pink and red.

There's hearts. Valentine. And so it already just seems like he's like a lover boy, you know? Add in a little Cupid arrow in there. He's so innocent. Sign your eye with a Cupid arrow. I don't know. Hearts everywhere on that.

Will you be my Valentine? Even girls are like getting into it. Dude. So lucky. Can you imagine? Hmm. Even when people are named after the months. Like you know a dude

And his name's like August You're like Wow Are you an R&B singer? God A girl named June You're like You just have flowers

In your hair constantly I love you You know It's that easy It's that easy Hey Girl named April You're like

Get out of the library You're cute Come on Oh my God You little nerd You bookworm What are you doing later? Autumn.

Never tell her. You got a crush on her, though. Hey, Autumn. Come on. I got a scarf. Autumn. Just take my life. What do you want me to do?

What do you want me to do for you? It's true. Name's big. Your name's big. From Neil. Down East Wood Ducks. Up boys. On the topic of minor league baseball teams

In Kinston, North Carolina, there used to be a minor league team called the Down East Wood Ducks. Cool enough name, fun-looking logo, but their nickname was the Woody's. Thought it was odd. But then they sold merch with Woody's written on a baseball bat, and I thought, am I being pranked? Who approved this? Who's buying this? Who's buying this? Why are they selling children's shirt that say this?

Love the Shah, Neil. Yeah. I mean, yeah, they get away with murder. The logo. Woody's. It's really South Carolina. with shirts, I just say cocks on it. I'm like, gosh.

Yeah, pretty aggressive. I mean, I guess, though. Let's go Cox. Go on, Cox. South Carolina with the bushes in the back of their end zone. Just want to trim those ones. So let me go down there.

So let me even those out. Do you want to go down there and do trivia with Alsham Jeffrey? No, just want to go cut the bushes. just with one of these things that's in your garage and it looks like a tortured tool medieval torture tools in your garage for 500

that thing you trim the bushes with I'm like damn yeah everybody's garage like yo you're dying with that was definitely a thing that they cut off genitalia back in like 1400 that thing is the most dramatic tool of all time

just hanging on your garage wall for all to see the garage tools kind of kind of scary. Hey, hedge clippers. It looks like a chains. Yeah. Dang. The clippers just go back and forth like that.

Just chop your ass off. You have a chains on your garage? I've never even seen that. You got to keep those hidden. Yeah. South Carolina, though, always like, they're good for an upset. They'll be eight and four, but.

So eight and four. Can South Carolina do anything else but be eight and four? The most eight and four, the most outback bowl school of all time. Bro, geez, man. South Carolina,

Iowa, just mark it up every year. Who's more eight and four? South Carolina or Texas A&M? I know Texas A&M. Sometimes they have some years, yeah. But majority of the time,

Texas A&M, you are eight and four, my friend. Yeah. But man, you're so dead on about South Carolina. I always have like the number one player too. Yeah, they do get some, that one recruit.

And you're just like, God, they always go to South Carolina, Cox. South Carolina Under Armour still? Mm-hmm. Man, they literally die. But they're switching to Nike. I think this year maybe. The coolest.

When they have the, the palm tree with the moon by it, I'm like, who made that? Probably the most, the most vibes logo ever. Probably best flag. Damn. That's a state.

You're right. Chicago's, well, is that Illinois or is that Chicago? I think it's a Chicago State flag with the stars on it. Yeah. It's not bad. But dude, the paltry and the moon? Yeah. That should be like a like a logo.

Like that's not even, that's crazy that. That's just there. That should be like a, like, you know, on AIM when you had the little picture in the bottom left corner. On AIM, you could like have your own little customized like box in the left hand corner. You could put whatever you wanted down there. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I forget what those are called. Yeah.

You know what I'm saying? It's going back to me a little bit. I spent maybe two and a half days trying to put a number two in that logo because I was number two at San Barnabas. I was like, that'd be so cool. Charlton. From Rob, varsity basketball coach. In high school, I dated my varsity basketball coach's daughter for three years. I wasn't a star athlete, but started my junior year in senior year at Point Guard, where the Adidas pro model all.

red with a white shell toe and white stripes east bay team shoe. Uh-huh. Very nice. Nothing is worse than getting caught in a full makeout session with the coach's daughter in the back of their minivan. Life was rough at practice for a few weeks, but now I look back and wonder why a coach just didn't kill me. Sent from my Nokia 3310.

Still have the original cell number 28 years later. That's what I'm talking about. Yeah, cell number. That's a big part of you. Has yours been the same? Same. You? That's how you know you're a real one.

It's 07. the people with like nine different cell phone numbers I'm like just tell us you killed somebody you know I'm like what's actually going on in your life like you're so chaotic for having so much like how many times you need to do that no I mean it it really is part of your identity stable but kind of scary it's like wow it's been through a lot of care everybody has it everybody in the world has it everybody you know ever remember just having somebody's number it was like a good feeling. Dude, I, so.

I wouldn't call or text him, but I'd be like, I have her number though. I wouldn't dare. Wouldn't dare, but I got her cell. Yeah. How you come across it too, you know? You like steal it from somebody's phone. You have her number? But then like maybe, you know, their friend will send it to you, you know, with like a little

smiley and you're like, oh, that was crazy. Oh, so they may not be too mad about this. Oh, no. When a girl sends you another girl's number with a smiley face, you're like, wow, I got some homework to do, dog. Mm-hmm. Yo, I got a what? I can text her? Do you ever get a girl's number from one of your homies, though?

And it's just like, clear that it's just like. Nah. I'm always, I'm always, I'm always wait for them to text first because I'm like, I just don't want to be like. It's a good call. Yeah, dude. What's up? Like, what? Who are you?

It's a good call. I, uh, so. When we were out and San Fran, and I was at that after party on Friday night, I'm talking with Kelsey, right? Uh-huh. And we're, you know, it's real good stuff. We're talking about different funny stuff. Yeah.

His family and my family and it's crazy. And so I'm like thinking, I'm like, do I ask him for a picture in this bar? Like, you know, I'm trying. I was like, don't ask him for a picture. So then we're still talking. But then finally he goes, yeah, man, you, mind if we take a picture? Said, no, dude, let's do it.

Yeah. Thank God. So, like, I'm like, all right, well, how are we going to do this? Evan takes. He's like, yeah, I can take one. I can take one. I can take one. So he ends up taking on both of our phones.

Uh-huh. But it crossed my mind to be like, no, man, why don't you just, we'll just air drop it. Why don't you give me your digital? Ooh, act like you don't know air drop exists. Hey, can you text that to me? But I was like, you, I crossed my. mind because he I was like yeah you can just take it on my phone and then I think I said he'd

take it on my phone and then I can just send it to you yeah you already had like given his phone to Evan too it's like shit I thought about I thought about being like yeah man we'll just exchange you know because you got kind of be aggressive in like networking scenarios like yeah you really I found that you just have to show up just be like yo man let me get you let me get your contact and then it's hard to say no because you don't want to be the bad guy right but like he definitely probably but I don't know I don't know but it was a weird situation of we were talking about asking for numbers and whatnot, the original number. It's like he probably don't want to give that out.

Nah. But you're, hey, Dwight, I don't know. You really got to trust somebody, bro. It's actually insane. When somebody asks for your number these days, I'm like, whoa, whoa, man. Yeah, well, I was doing a bunch of that at the Super Bowl, though, because now with these, like, I didn't know that you could just like literally hold it. And then it just like, z, and then you have it.

And so that's kind of cool, but also a little freaky. I'm not on that either, though. the amount of times I heard Oh we're touch your tips We're touching tips bro I was like ha ha ha ha ha ha It is like the gayest feeling though You know

I'm like air drop me those pictures We just had sex Air drop me those pictures Did we just make out? Hey what's weirder having to do that Or when you're like ordering And drive through a Chick-fil-A And I hold the thing right there for you

And there's that moment Or you slip in your card And you're just sitting there And while they have the handheld And you put punch on there You kind of miss one time and we're like, oh, sorry, let me slide it in there. So awkward.

I'm like, well, I just took, I just take your virginity. We know you, old chick-fil-A employee. My pleasure. Oh, God. From Mike. I didn't even talk about Rob. Sorry, we have so many.

I'm trying to get through him. Talk about who? Rob, he mentioned the number, but then how he dated the shoes are sick. Or they did his pro model all red with a white show to sheltow, geez, stroke meter and white stripes. Pretty good for an Adidas shoe. Coach's daughter, huh? So you really did the whole Friday night lights,

Coach Taylor thing, Matt Sarison. Always weird when somebody would date a coach's daughter. Well, yeah, where we went to school, I was in the same class as coach's daughter, his oldest daughter. And so, of course, I wonder if this happened to you, Robin,

you just blew right through it, but we had the whole conversation. You were about part of that. He got the entirety of the football program together because his daughter was coming into high school. And so he got the entirety of the football program, seniors through freshmen all together

and gave the coaches talk about the daughter. That's pretty insane. This is my life and my blood, my heart. You mess with my heart. Here's what I'll do to you. I think he actually brought in props, if I remember correctly. He made it funny though, right?

Yeah, like funny, but like made the point. But I think he brought in you garage tool actually. I swear, I feel like I remember that. Weed Wacker. Yeah.

Yeah, it's always tough though because you know, like the mom is probably just like, she's trying to have a normal high school experience.

And no, none of the boys are going to ask her to homecoming. She's like, good. I don't want them to touch her.

That's so true. The mom just trying to, Dad. You don't know anything. I always like, was wondering in that moment

I'm like who's gonna take a shot at it and then you're kind of thinking too you're like is she like my type you know someone always did yeah who's taking a who's taking a shot at her huh huh someone always did yeah what a weird moment good for you though Rob

in the back of the van yeah hey you started though so coach can be too mad I guess when your girlfriend's parents see you making out with them. I'm like, well, I can't come here ever again. Dude, never.

Can't believe I, like, let it slip, too. I was always so, like, I was so over the top the other way. I'd be like, even when we were just sitting in the living room, I'd be on the other side of the couch. Yeah, get away from me. Why are you even here? I don't even like you. You're disgusting.

Like, on the road, on road territory, no, I'm good. Mm-hmm. My dad, dude. I had a girl over here when my dad lived here. Nightmare. He was like, why don't you guys go outside and play basketball or something? He was always trying to like,

what do you guys like, what did you guys like get at? Like, go to walk. Huh? Even that. Well, yeah,

because you can't monitor. Right. And dude, walks can get dangerous. You stop off at a park. Hey, what's up, swings?

What's up, top of the slide? What's going on? What up, Tube Slide? Nobody knows what's going on in here. Not that I. This is from Mike says, Appreciate the Gull.

Boys, huge fan. Your pod makes Tuesdays painful because I laugh so hard. Anyway, Joey's impression of local sports radio hosts has now ruined my life. Yes. Whenever I end up on a phone call with my wife, I say like Joey would. Appreciate the gulp.

My wife hates it. I think it's funny as hell. Oh my God. Dude, if you started saying that to your wife on the phone, she would kill you. Wow. Why'd you get divorced? It's talking to my wife like a sports radio host. He wouldn't stop saying you call back any time.

I know I can call back any time. Can we make that a bit, please? Your wife hits you up. Thanks for the phone call. Ryan, I appreciate the phone call. I do. You call back anytime now. I'm going to hang up and listen.

Appreciate the phone call. The listener. You, me, and a whole lot of truth on the other side. With your wife. Oh, my God. On the other side, dude. The other side of what? You, me, the Colts Keys to the win this weekend on the other side.

Your wife's like. just pick up eggs, please, from the store tucked the edge of the break. Just keep going at it. Oh, my God. Perfect grounds for divorce there. Mom, dad, what happened to our family?

Well, I wouldn't stop talking to your mom like J and V. A local podcast. Keeps going to break too, like turning music up. Like, you know, like for. Rejoiners? Nothing like a rejoin. It's the best part of radio. What happened to you and mom?

Rejoiners are the best part of sports radio. It really is. Listening to the ride. I just really like songs. That's why I'm a producer. Bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, ban. And the free reign of a producer to just be able to pick any song he wants

in the entire world to play a rejoiner for. I'm like, we sure we have the, We're like royalties, the clearance to play that song. You never do. Yeah, I'm like, does Aerosmith know? We're just banging. Nope, never do. Nobody cares.

All right. FCC violate. Shut up. Teases, man, though. I will say when a sports radio host is nice with the teases, I do got to tip my cap. Oh, like before and after the break. Because it'll get you, you know, I'll get you with like, something I noticed about the Pacers

that really had me thinking this could be the move that decides what happened. Something that I saw last night and I'll tell you after the break. You're like, oh, he gives you to leave you to the hub and you're like, what's he going to say? What is it? What is it? Oh, no, son of a bitch.

Trade deadline just around the corner and something that I noticed the Pacers did with their cap space. You're like, wait a minute. Hold on, dude. Are we about to make a move? Not a local podcast. Not a trade deadline podcast.

And I'll tell you what. And four. Dude, does anybody get more excited than a guy when someone says trade deadline? Oh, I'm like, wait a minute, yo. Dogs. Because so many things. Trade deadline? There's like four words like that for guys.

They just turn into the dogs. Trade deadline. Constant. Just constant refresh. Oh, my God. Oh, dude. No way to give that up. Something always goes down.

And you're like, Damn, right before. It's always like somebody that doesn't matter, but it's still kind of matters. Yeah. Always like Rudy Gay. Wait a minute. Station about NBA 2K 11 Rudy Gay? Everybody knows about that, dude.

I think even my dad knows about that. All right from Robert. Oh, it's a long one. All right. High School Tales of the Crypt. Wow. Hey, guys, as this is the ultimate podcast about nothing, Joe Love the Seinfeld bits.

throw this at you guys. Thanks. I recently attended an informal high school reunion and was sadden to hear about the passing of a beloved priest, Father Shevlin, also known as shell-shocked Shevlin. He was a great teacher who was a subject of a school urban legend. Every year during orientation, upperclassmen warned freshmen not to sit in the front row of his class.

The legend claimed he was a chaplain who served several tours in Vietnam and witnessed many bombing campaigns. Students were told that if someone accidentally dropped a book, he would get flashbacks and turn into it. to a West Craven character go berserk and attack the front row. But no one ever actually witnessed this happening. How pathetic were we for believing that shit? Of course, only a generational Catholic high school student would think nothing of that and go on with their day.

I'm sure he knew about the rumors and probably reveled in it. I know my school wasn't unique when it came to teachers of the mysterious past, whether it was manufactured or not. Can you remember a teacher or a coach in your school who was the victim of a so-called urban legend? What was it ever confirmed? Rest and peace, father. Not an obituary podcast. These guys, Boston, Cubs versus Sox closing out the season, not a sports podcast. Build a show around it.

Aiden and Mass. Build a show around it. Yeah, that's true. Cubs are closing out the season at Finway. Never been. Sounds fun. Let's go. Baseball podcast starting now.

Yeah, I was going to say, dude. Hey, pitchers and catchers report today. Nuh. Yeah. Oh. You wore the piazza just in time. Baseball, one spring training. Is that what it's called?

Spring training. Yeah, it starts like next week. So spring break hats. Met's Orange Bill, no reason. Love it. Yeah, when you were telling that story about father, I was like, yeah, that sounds about right. So I was like, do I go to your school?

Did we have a teacher that like, you can't do we had a teacher with a mentally challenged son? You couldn't say the R word. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that was a big deal. Because the R word was popping. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

That was true. That was legit. Like you would... Walking on eggshells all class. Like, whoa, I almost said it. Like, it was a huge yell. And when somebody did say it, it was like the most dramatic episode of all time. Mm-hmm.

Priest or teachers? Hmm. I remember like substitute teachers had a lot more lore for... us than the regular teachers that I remember. Substantitude teachers were just, well, like, what a side character that just hops in one day. He's like, wow, oh my God, we got a sub today. I just remember we had this,

we had the subname Mr. Borst. He was a dog, bro. And like, he was super strict, but, like, if you got on his good side, he would rock with you. And then he was classic substitute teacher where you start playing this game. Always available, man.

You'd be, you know, people would be like, did you teach my older sister? And he'd be like, Walsh's name? And she was like, you know, Rachel Marshall. And he'd be like, yeah, it sounds familiar.

I think I did. And then you'd keep going with it. And then we'd start like saying names of like random athletes. No way. Like, I think that was, yeah, I remember that, that kid. Did you, did you teach

my brother Pierre Garcin? He just keep going like that. We did. Yeah. And every time he would just acknowledge it and be like, yeah, I think I do remember that. Mr. Boarst, probably not with us anymore. I don't know, bro. I think he looks exactly the same. He would dye his mustache and hair. I just respected it for him so hard. I'm like, man, he's just not letting that go. Always on time.

Oh, yeah. He was so dialed in. Like, you just had to respect it. I was like, I mean, yeah, we got a sub and it's kind of, you know, it's whatever. Like, he might be worse than the actual teacher a little bit. But, like, he's so prepared that, like, you just can't, you cannot respect that. Dude's all about the syllabus, knows every little thing. We had, uh, we had another one who was, he would just flip on a literal dime, dude.

He'd come in and he'd be all smiles and you'd be like, all right, cool. Who was it? And all of a sudden, the bell would ring. And as soon as the bell rang, and if you didn't lock in and stop talking, he would just jump on your ass. Mr. Kelly, you remember Mr. Kelly? Oh. The bell has rung. Whoa.

Now you want to mess around. You want to keep talking. I'll send you back to St. Jude. And it was like kind of, it was like funny, but I was like, I don't know. It's funny, but like he's dead. He wasn't doing it to be fun. He's dead ass. Serious.

It's one of those bad ones were like his, the way he would present it, he would start. laughing and then he would get even more pissed and then you keep laughing more. Send you down to Mr. Ponorelli. Yes, yes. I was like, such a threat. The threat sub. This guy would come in with threats

every machine gun threats. No talking for the rest of class. Send you down to Mr. Pontorelli. I'll see him back to St. Joe. Like send you to a different school. You're like, you can't, huh? How are you going to do that? And then you'd see him at like a basketball game,

taking pictures. And he would be all happy, funny, funny. games. I'm like, you just yelled at me like four hours ago. But yeah. Take this picture of me. In my friends. Like, what a side hustle that is, just sub photographer. I'm like, what about your, what else happens in your life? Me and Ben, both history of subteachers. Please. No, we did. Remember? At the same time when we were like both at the rate at the station and also started to espresso. At the same school? No.

Oh, okay, okay, okay. I was like, did we sub at the same time, though? We did. Oh, yeah. Different, yeah. A different school. So nervous. Just going through roll call was a nightmare.

I was like, I'm getting absolutely roasted right now. 17 Megan's. Megan. Megan. Not saying any last name's Megan. I don't know how to pronounce a Megan. Yeah. We didn't have like, I remember there was, it wasn't so much about like teachers.

Maybe some coaches. But there was urban legends of like, hey, people are going to ask you, upper class, we're going to ask you to buy a hall pass or an elevator pass. There's no elevator pass. They're going to try to sell you an elevator pass. There's not any. So don't do that. Like when you're a sub?

No, when you're coming into high school. Oh, yeah. There's like urban legends like that. I was so scared. Didn't know where anything was. I would have definitely done that. Sure. Oh, yeah.

How much is it? Right. Yeah, I'll ask my parents for money. Tomorrow, I'll give it to you. There's an elevator pass? Yeah. There's no elevator. From Casey.

Clubhouse, Know about Celebration Station? Medium time, second time. Not a reminiscent podcast, but when I was growing up in Oklahoma, there was a single greatest place on earth in southwest Oklahoma City. Celebration Station. Giant Arcade. It was the first place I played NFL Blitz. Go-carts.

bumper boats and a nine hole par three golf course. It was like somebody found a sports and video game obsessed Richie Rich type kid and said, build your playground. And that kid and I shared a brain. As I've gotten older, I realized that this is probably wasn't a one-off place and that every somewhat large city probably had places like it. Did the clubhouse grow up near one?

Or was I just the luckiest kid on earth? Smack my ass with a Nokia 7600 from 2003 that was going to be the future of cell phones and still should have been. Whoa. Kind of looks like a walkman. CD player. Numbers on the sides. That's insane.

Skinny. Interesting. So hold on. What was Celebration Station? It was like, it was essentially like his like Rascals Fun Zone. Yeah, everybody had their own.

Great times. Was great times a chain or was that just here? I think it was just here. Yo, like people like my sister's high school class or eighth grade class or something had a lock-in Yeah, what was that about?

How is that allowed? The whole grade would just, yeah, stay there for a night. Can you imagine doing that with your best friends? I'm like, that is what happens when you die. You go to heaven. You go to great times with your day one friends. And you guys were just doing that?

And also like the two girls that you kind of have a crush. Whole place to ourselves. Yeah, go run on. off your crush, everything you know and love, your best friends. Free food too. Oh, yeah, we're going to have a movie in this room playing. Yeah, laser tag. Shut up the whole play.

I'm like, how much did this cost? Dude, it's probably not even like $500 to do that. I totally lock in. Lock in, too. Like the coolest. I'm like, this is an event. Me and my sister were in the car and we drove by great time. She was like, lock in.

I was like, you are so, you don't know how lucky you have it. you did that and like for their eighth grade trips too and this is like how many years above us like five or six years they would go to like king's island for their eighth grade trip did you guys no went to navy pier dude we went to the fedex center where they ship packages well you guys had a bad class yeah but like dog you guys had chattel feral and joe king just the tallest guy's getting in trouble just a tallest guy's getting in trouble just a tall You got a tall guy in your grade? He's going to be the troublemaker. He guys had them to and Sam Patterson. You weren't doing much. Oh, and we had other, yeah. You couldn't go places.

We couldn't do anything. But we still love. We're like, oh my God, FedEx. Just to be somewhere else. Yeah. Yeah, there's a big tower that we can go up there. Like, dude, we're just love doing whatever. But can you imagine going on an eighth grade trip to Kings Island?

Yeah. No, dude. I can't even imagine going to Kings Island now. I'd be like, this is going to be so much. fun. Yeah, the great times. It did. Great times.

That's essentially what you're talking about. It had just so many arcade games, like three levels of arcade games, a pizza place in there. And then it had bumper cars outside. It had a put putt putt. It was attached to a bowling alley as well that also had laser tag. Yep. And there were the ball pit in there, the tubes.

Like they, and that went off. Like, great times was so much fun. I wasn't even allowed to go. Like, you know, I'm like, it's just too fun. Like, my parents think it's too fun. I can't go do that. You know what I mean? The place is too cool that parents just say,

nah. Too lit. Yeah, it's got a reputation for being the coolest place in town. I'll never see it. You had to have been invited to a few birthday parties. And even then, it's like you've got to be good for a month. Yeah. Like, you got to clean the house.

You got to get good grades for a month to go to that birthday party at great times. And I'm like, Who's having? What celebrity in our class is having a birthday at great times? That's amazing. Ice cream cake. Laser tag was big from like 11 to 13 years old. Yeah, you kind of- want to play it. You kind of graduated from bowling to laser tag for the birthday party. Laser tag birthday party. I remember going to a men-in-black one at DZ Discovery Zone, rich kids in my grade. Got an Xbox the first year it came out. Wow. Gotta know. Who? Danny Allen.

Nah. Good call. Danny Allen, two podcasts in a row. You're right there, bro. We're getting warmer. Ross McCauley.

It's so close. You'll never guess. They went to Center Grove. Oh, all right. The Foxes, Alex Adam, Chad Fox,

that family. Oh, okay. Rolling, bro. First grade, I'll never forget. They had the Jordan 13s, like when the Bulls are in the playoffs. I was like,

there's no way. We're just standing outside of art class. and you guys have the Jordan 13s on. I'm like, I just watch him put 30 on the Pacers last night in those. And you're just willy-nilly. Yeah, just painted this picture of my house with a landscape and the sun in the corner. And I'm wearing Jordan 13s right off the shelf. Seven-year-old Johnson's still the same.

I'm like, you guys have those? Yeah, we got Xbox for Christmas, all the games that were out. I was like, dude. Fox. Fox. Fox. It's a rich last name. Fox. So many people. So much pizza after birth. From Scott. Pitchers wearing coats.

Sub-Bel fellas, not a baseball podcast, but that previous emailer was right. Baseball has lost its aura. I think the biggest reason for this is the new DH rules. Kids these days don't understand what it was like to see a pitcher go up to bat or run the bases wearing a big ass coat. Really better times. My question for you this week is, what would be your go-to baseball fit? I feel like Joey had the bag of your pants and a slightly curved bill with some shades upside on there plus some lettuce hanging out of the back of the side. Yo.

Scott, did I play against you in high school? Because that was it. Ben probably rocking the high socks. No undershirt look. Of course, everyone on the team calls him Hollywood. Anyways,

I appreciate the nice things you guys said about Kansas City a few episodes of the back. Please do a show here soon and slap my ass so hard. I get barbecue sauce on my black Dante Hall jersey. Ooh. Damn, I forgot to bring your Black Priest's jersey. Hey, man. It only gets better the longer we wait, dude. You get it to me in 30 years.

I'd be even more excited. Oh, yeah! Nope, Christmas this year. Got our first Christmas mention, February. Wow. God, I miss Christmas so much. In the past two weeks, I've been like, Crisp. I think I texted you, actually.

He did. That was crazy. Usually it's nothing but just like about this show or just some bullshit, but he on a real note would text me about Christmas. I always feel out of line. When I text you about something random, I feel like I should, you know, we shouldn't be doing this.

I'm like, he's got other things that worry about. He's probably like chasing his dog down the road. I'm texting about Christmas. That's what I always think in my head. But I'm like, I don't even know. Like,

I feel like you're mid stride, like looking at your phone. Like, he's talking about Christmas right now. I've got to find my dog. It was so funny, though. Yeah, when like Bragg Maddox would somehow get on base.

Just the biggest dork of all time. My head to split over. Biggest accountant. Dork. And he would have that huge, huge, what was the brand that we mentioned? Majestic, huge majestic, huge majestic pitchers coat on. Oh, yeah, dude. Wait, they would wear that.

Yeah. While they were on the base. Yeah, because, you know, pitchers got to stay warm and, like, loose. And I need to see a picture. Oh, yeah, dude. It was crazy. I thought it was absolutely amazing when pitchers would hit home runs. Greg Maddox had to have like 50 one year.

Dude, I swear. Craig Maddox was bombs, dude. Where is this? They ran the bases in a pitchers coat? You're allowed to do that? Yeah, they would like stop the game and like the bat boy would bring it out, trot out there. Then they'd get it zipped up.

Pitchers such divas. Oh my God, yeah. Greg Maddox was hitting bombs. What other pitchers were just going yard? Carlos Zambrano. You know about Carlos Zambrano? That's so crazy. Dude, I was like, what?

How's that pitcher let another pitcher go yard off of them? That's so much disrespect. Oh, my God. You own that other pitcher. But, uh... Here we go. They would wear that on base. Yes, and run to second base with a,

with a Stephen Barry's jacket on. They would run the second base in there? There's no way. They're running the bases. Yes. Absolutely not. I got to see video,

bro. Stephen Barry's baseball jacket on in a real game, live real time. He's trying to steal the jacket on it? Oh, no, dude. They basically stayed on the base.

Like, pitchers can't do anything other than pitch hard. Yeah. Everything else is just a bonus. Yeah. I love it when pitchers. were up to bat.

I'm like, what is this? Can we skip him? Such a baby deer. Like, said no business being up there. What are you doing? Yeah.

But also I'm like, you're a professional athlete. Look apart. Mm-hmm. Like punters in the NFL. Yeah. That always makes me so mad. I'm like,

why do you have to look like a totally different person out here? You nailed me, Scott. Yep, always with the hair coming out of the back. Good look. I don't know what I was.

I don't really know baseball swag. I'd definitely be all about the fighting necklace though i'd wear like 34 i was gonna say yeah you have a shit ton of those you'd also have the wrist tape like all the way we'd do that yeah it's a pretty spot on i think ben would probably have

I mean tough for him but i think he'd probably have some lettuce too you just have to it looks good you just have to um from Blake actually let's go to Vinnie Blake we'll get to you next week They should call it.

Get me done. Alabama, AFC, Georgia, NFC. They're both kind of NFC, but yeah. Georgia is so much more NFC than Alabama. Just because, like, I don't know. Just because the Packers logo. Yeah, and there's, holy. Can we fix that, Georgia?

Can we address the situation? Situation. Fellas, just going on. Second time email they're here. I've been listening for about a year. Y'all never failed to make me laugh while I'm driving on stop for work. Thanks buddy. My question involves something I find myself always thinking about but never really talked

about out loud. So basically exactly what this pot is. Wow. Nailed it. So let's say you're at some kind of respectful function. Amount of slices. You're at a respectful function and there's pizza involved. What is the acceptable amount of slices to put down without being a piece of shit?

I'm not talking about a night where you're drunk with your buddies and order a bunch of pizza, but more so a family function, restaurant dinner, eating with your coworkers, your girl, her fam, and also you're at least over the age of 21. Obviously, if I was a high schooler or a drunk college student, I would shamelessly house at least five or six slices, no matter where I am. Now as a mid-20s dude,

in fairly good shape, I would try and cap myself at three as I think that's the cutoff mark before looking and feeling like a fat piece of shit. Obviously, different factors come in like hunger level, type and size of pizza and setting. What do y'all think a slice cutoff should be as an adult in that situation? Slop my ass with a tube of go-go.

while I wear the headset Brady Hoke never wore at Michigan. Yes, Notre Dame doesn't need to join a conference. They need to just play Michigan State every year again. That's when football was football. Wow. Wait, they don't play Michigan State? I love Notre Dame Michigan State.

Yeah, when Notre Dame would play at Michigan State always on like a third Saturday night. Does Michigan State play away? Michigan State's never had an away game, dude. It's either at a day. night against Notre Dame or the grungiest gray cloudy piece of shit weather against Kent State. Oh, man. Some of that Michigan State that I secretly love.

Just feels like home for no reason. Well, it's just, it's too close. It's like, you know, the opposite of love isn't hate. It's indifference. Wow. I'm going to cry. It's like you love Michigan, but Michigan State is like still. It's right there.

This is every big 10 team. I just like, there's a little bit of. me that like I just don't hate any of them. Yeah. Nebraska, Wisconsin. I'm like, same team. Um, okay, respectable amount. Uh, yes. So what I'm envisioning here is,

laid it down. What I'm envisioning here is a work happy hour where the boss is like, yeah, we'll get in some pizza. You'll have some, we'll have some, we'll have some. There's two leaders. You know, you can have two leaders or you can have some beers. Clear cups. So I'm thinking, uh, that and I'm thinking that it's hand tossed pizza.

so regular slices from I'm saying Is it like a local place? Probably Yeah you're like ah So I'm gonna go with If you get a

One plate You're at work Yeah Okay Or even if it's not at work It's with work people At that local joint That's right down the road

From your office Okay Are you starving? I think so I don't think I've never not been starving at work. Like, it's just part of the game. I think, I think you get, if you walk out with a paper plate of two hand-toss slices of pizza, I think that's fair. Good to go.

I think that's good. I think that does the job. Hand-toss is like a solid amount of pizza. Because like you said, if they had Donatoes or one of those places that has the little tiny squares, I mean, you get three-corner pieces, that all basically adds up to maybe one hand tossed. Yeah. So you get three corner pieces in a regular slice. You can go five slices of that kind of pizza.

Yeah. But hand toss, I think two. I think you're probably capped it. The third beer is like you got two down and then somebody else is just like, I'll do one more. Let's do one more. Come on. Let's do one more.

All right. I'll do one more. You got to kind of play the game being talked into it a little bit. Mm-hmm. Is your crush there? everything in my life is determined is my crush you tell me yeah i don't think it matters if she's there or not i i just like it when there's a situation going on like that and somebody like breaks the the ice you know like everybody's being delicate and then there's a guy with like nine

pieces he's like fuck it bro and you're like yes that's true that's that's that's that's the cheat code is that if you don't want to be that guy benny if you want to if you don't want to be fat guy, which is fine. You need to have that guy with you. I think you, yeah. You need or you need to be around. You need to peg who the guy in your office is. It's going to be the, okay, he's going to be the fun breaker. And also like, you're trying to get back at work. So you're trying to like, yo, I'm taking this this pizza home. And like, you're taking all the pizza. Like, I love the guy. That's just like, I don't care. I'm, I'm doing this. And I'm like, okay, now it's like consensus. We're all just like eating as much pieces as possible. It's a

contest now. Yeah, there's always got to be the seal breaker. Seal breaker for food, seal breaker for drinks. Yeah. And you usually don't want it to be you. But my final answer is, yeah, if we're just all things considered, hand-toss, two slices, two beers with the third one being like, come on. It's Thursday, right?

Come on. Yeah. I want to be the icebreaker guy. I don't think I would be. It just kind of really depends. The star's got a line. But I would be the guy that's like two pieces, two pieces, two pieces. two pieces, two pieces, two pieces.

And I would just, I would eat like three pizzas, but like trying to look like I'm not. Go talk to different people. A couple pieces in the bathroom. She's like making fun of how much you, how much pizza you ate. Does he get fed at home? Is he poor?

Yes. And no and yes. I need a drink. Do you have a water or a coffee or anything over there? My mouth is so dry. Give me a, just give me a big. Just give me a big glass of water.

Dude, sparkling or not? Are you about that? No, just regular. What does sparkling even do? Right. It tastes like a fart. All right, fine. All right, fine.

Got talked into it. I'm trying to put you on, sparkling. All right, put me on. Oh, this is good. Different. What do you think? Shock you? It's cool.

I feel like you never had water before. It's good. I mean, watching at it, like. what is it what we put in this all right let's get to one more here I just needed one I just needed a little refresher before this from Matt

and Gruden voice I love dudes man wow hey guys I recently started a new job when my manager showed me my new cubicle all I could think about was well posters I was going to put on a big empty wall in there here my suggestion so far priest Holmes

Dale senior Young Tiger Woods Texas USC Rose Bowl I'm wondering if it's the Vince Vince Young Corner shot probably The bus Roger Federer Young LeBron 2015 Cam Newton Travis Hafner

aka Prank Megatron Any other ideas Here's to a new era for the Steelers Yeah tip of the cap to that Matt I agree That's so cool posters in a cubicle Just make you feel right at home Yeah

adds little personality old talking points in there I mean, you just feel, you're, I can't wait to be there a little bit, even though you hate it. You're just like, I just want to go in my little space. Yep. Nothing for me beats the NFL poster, which is half of it is NFC and half of it's AFC, and it just has all the team logos. I used to have that on my wall. I'd get a new one every year. Even though the teams are the same every year, I would just get new one.

Poster would be a little bit different, though. It'd switch up, you know? Oh, yeah, yeah. They'd switch at, like, where they are. and like they'd have like a like a maybe the logos would be in a circle like the graphics on box and the next year it'd be the helmet yeah kind of like uh when you're playing a sports or like sports sports video game and like before the game start it has like all the team logos on the screen yeah oh oh the patients are really in there the patients are really in there they're down there yeah

yeah you act like they wouldn't put a man your home team yeah i always love that poster just because it's just like, yeah. I don't always, I don't know something about it. Yeah, I'd probably go with, uh, big one for,

for me is always, uh, Reggie Miller in the garden. It's hard to find that. Yeah. I'm like, I can even find a good picture of that on Google images.

Same with the Tyrese one too, because I was looking for one for Christmas. And they just don't have it. I'm like, damn, that's like the moment. Young Tiger Woods. Wow.

What would I have in my cubicle? Probably the same posters I had like in my room. I had been Wallace and Rashid Wallace just like next to each other in my room in high school. I was like, oh my God. Yeah, just whatever you get at the school. Scholastic book fair. Book fair posters. Marshall Falk.

I think like all of us had that poster. A prowler. A yellow prowler in the corner. Yeah. I came, I was at Walmart. I, like, before they closed or something, I was just walking around and I saw the, like, rack of posters. Remember that?

I thought, I thought they, like, did away with that. Yeah. No, they're still there. Still there. And they've got all the stuff still. I'm like, you guys barely updated this. There's like a Brat stall post. I was like, okay.

We're still doing that? There's like a suit. There's like a Spider-Man one. I was like, let's go. There's an AFC, NFC, NFL one. Powder puff. girls. Yeah.

That one of Edron James with his gold gold teeth Sean down in Miami. No local podcast. Ricky Williams on the dolphins. Good one. God, I always like, Ricky Williams always like so like overheated when they the dolphins. The sun would be on them.

Like hair would be long. The teeth would be shining. He just looks so hot. Yeah. Yep. Yep. I think that Edron one that was talking about, I think that was a cover of Sports Illustrated. Great. God, they have some of the best covers.

Sometimes I can't even believe Sports Illustrated or ESPN the magazine. God, those guys to do that. I know. There's one with like Peyton Manning and Jeff Saturday. I'm like, when did they agree to that? Peyton is like looking hard. Yeah. Like has just shoulder pads on and no shirt.

I'm like, dude. How much you pay him? My ultimate would be Dante Hall, X Factor. Having that near Hugel. Dude, do you achieve? man. Nah, dude. Just like X Factor.

Just the joy, the joystick, dude. It's all I need. Human joystick. That's a good start there, though, Matt. You have to send a pick. And when you get those up, your boss is just being like, this isn't your room.

No, I'd be so hype if I was a boss and saw that. I'd be like, bro, I'm getting him one for Christmas. Like, can we have more employees, like, putting stuff in their cubicles? Please. Enough of your kids. Ew. Your family?

Hey, it's Faith Family Football, all right. Your dumb dog? I know you hate that dog. Enough. Drop the dog. Give me Dante. Pol Pepper and Hall. Kevin Garnett, headbutting the basketball hoop.

Your son? Or Kevin Garnett, sweaty head, headbutting the basketball hoop? Yeah. Vince Carter mid-flight or your family? Vince Carter Cockback Back scratcher Elbow in the rim

Or your grandma that passed away Come on Let's give the real answer Gone but not forgotten Slammed on contest All right RIP I had to go pick up my daughter

Gotta go get my baby Oh my head's gonna split up it bro I gotta go ahead Go get my baby I gotta pick up my baby Hey you could go head and go upload this. I got to pick up my baby. Gotta bring my baby in.

Oh, shit. All right. Good deal. These guys, L.O.L. on Instagram, these guys, L.O.L. on YouTube. Subscribe. Leave the poster. Leave the poster that you want in your cubicle. Wow. Nice. Can be anything. Rich eyes on the screen. Right on him on the street corner in San Francisco. I am sure I will see you at the combine. All right, see you there, pal Oh my god

Dude, just the calmest voice of all time Rich Eisen, sing me to sleep No shit All right, good deal You know how to follow us Anything you got? Nah See you next week

Day next week These guys 172 My hassle back Hey Feeley