THESE GUYS! - KYLE LONG’S SUPER BOWL PICK + CBS SET UP TONY ROMO? + DRUNK EBAY BUYS

Episode Date: August 4, 2026

The Boys map out the chaos of surviving drunk church, the chapstick clubhouse conspiracy and why you have to order margarita chicken on a Sunday night Chili’s.We sit down with Bears legend Kyle Long to talk about coaches making you put baby powder in your ahhh, what it was like growing up with Howie Long’s legendary flat-top, and the 6th grade tragedy of tucking his collared shirt into his underwear. Kyle breaks down what actually goes on in the trenches, including the graphic reality of linemen peeing their pants during games and tells us why he shaved his head at the combine with a Gillette Mach 3 razor. Plus, Benny and JoyJoy debate whether CBS set up Tony Romo’s OWI to get out of his contract, why Kliff Kingsbury is secretly stealing everyone's girl in a quarter-zip, and the pain of getting banned from eBay for twenty years over fake Jordan 11s. THESE GUYS LIVE in NYC 🍎 Sept 1ST 🫡 GET YOUR TIX BELOW 🎟️ 🎟️ *LIVE SHOW TICKETS!*https://www.ticketmaster.com/these-guys-200th-episode-special-live-new-york-new-york-09-01-2026/event/000064C99E46D47D🤝 *JOIN THE CLUBHOUSE DISCORD*TG CLUBHOUSE https://discord.gg/7X63C4HF8y📬 *SUPPORT THE SHOW*Hit us up on the email line: [e-mail]🎧 *Listen to the full pod*https://open.spotify.com/show/0DCF4F4r78p0eXiD3fyh2Lhttps://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/these-guys/id1649757408🍻 *Follow us on Instagram*These Guys! https://www.instagram.com/theseguyslolBenedict Polizzi https://www.instagram.com/benedictpolizziJoey Mulinaro https://www.instagram.com/joeymulinaroFollow our Facebook Page!https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61579678466463🧢 *50% OFF ALL MERCH with code BALD at checkout*https://www.benedictmerch.com

My dad doesn't use any product. He just wakes up and it stands up like that. Oh, yeah. I'm telling you. Like, if his hair was longer, he would have that perfect brush back into a mullet. You know what I mean? Not bad for a fat guy. What up, Clubhouse?

It's Benny Plitzy and Joey Mullenero on this week's TG. Did they have another guest on? Was it Kyle Long? Did they talk about his dad's flat top? Maybe. New segment, Clubhouse conspiracies. Did CBS set up a hit on Tony Romo? Probably.

Is the trade deadline the dude version of Summerhouse? Yes. And have you ever gotten eBay drunk and bought Jerome Bettis's AirPods? No. Let's start the shop. T to TG. 107. Oh, God.

197 and feeling like we're in heaven. I'm joking right. Come on. Jesus Christ has risen today. Come on. I haven't been to church in six years. all good who's almost got kicked out one time

whoops almost got kicked out for making vines whoops like the priest actually tried to kick you out or you're dead no like it was bad I was getting dirty looks

from like the people in the back man Easter 2012 oh Easter 2 dude that's the Super Bowl you can't be that's like shrieking at the Super Bowl

bro I didn't know I was going to church that day either so the night before I was getting blasted My dad was like picking you up at seven for church, B. I was like, I think I bonged a beer at 5 a.m. Bonged to beer two hours ago.

A little drunk church. Hey, should have asked our guest this week about a little Catholic church drunkenness because I guess this week is Kyle, KLKLKLKL. The Bears legend. Now you'll see him on NFL today on CBS. He's on the big show. We're talking James Brown. We're talking Bill Cower.

You'll see him on there. before he watch not a local pod, Colts Titans. And we had him for almost an hour. Or Colts Texans. Or Colts Texans, right? They could mix it up a little bit.

Had him for almost an hour. Talk all sorts of growing up with Howie Long as his dad, playing ball in high school, you know, predictions of the NFL, really, really awesome stuff. And the reason I said that is

because he grew up Catholic. You know, the Longs, Howie Long, famous Catholic with the Villanova. But really enjoyed Kyle Long, man. Feeling it. feeling it on the show

and feeling like we're ready to go to New York City. New York City. We are a few weeks away, about a month away. From New York City, Gramercy Theater, you know the deal. September 1st, me, Benny, maybe some special guests, Jersey contests, pizza throwing, pizza party, shit, who knows?

Throw pizza at the back of our heads? Maybe. Bring pity to the city. September 1. Book the flights. Less than a month. Get your tickeys below. Gramercy TG Live. Bring the boys. Bring the girls.

See you there. See you there, baby. Feeling good. Feeling good. Hey, did you see by chance? All that went down with Tony Romo?

No, I didn't see it. Didn't see one thing about it. Didn't order a Tony Romo jersey off eBay two days ago. Didn't do that. I'm surprised you don't don't have it on right now. I know.

I think it came into that, but my mail place is closed. I was like, no! What, which cowboy? Are we talking Thanksgiving Day? What do you mean?

Which cowboy jersey? Oh, Navy, Navy, Navy, Navy. Yeah. Maybe just hits. Wait, wait. Navy, like I'm saying,

Navy that had the white helmet or Navy like Quincy Williams, T.O. Quincy Carter? Quincy Carter. Sorry. Yeah, yeah. QC.

QC style. Okay. All right. Gotcha. So not the old school Thanksgiving Day. Nah, with the stars. Navy with the white. No, okay. The Emmett Smith joints. No, those are like the hardest jerseys of all time though. Like, the Cowboys don't get enough credit for that. Like those Cowboys use with the stars on the shoulders. Every time I, with Dion. Oh, what? White helmet too. Loose sleeves. Headband around neck.

Two bar. Two bar robot. Did Tony Roma have the best loose sleeves? in NFL history. He looked pretty good out there. So QB. Yeah. I like the way that his chin strap dangled. I just thought you were about to say when you had eBay for Tony Romo, I thought you're

going to say it was going to be like a t-shirt with his mugshot on it. No, that's a good idea, though. Man, you know, I got to, I got to play it. I got to plan a little bit of a conspiracy here, I think. You ready? Clubhouse. New segment, Clubhouse conspiracies.

Clubhouse conspiracy, you know, all that went down with Tony Romo, they got arrested for OWI, CBS put them on paid leave. I don't even know if it's paid leave. They put them on leave of absence.

JJ Watt's going to go. Whole CBS show here this week. Kyle Long, JJ Watt, Tony Romo. But I think that CBS is a conspiracy. This is, again,

come after us, just my conspiracy. I think CBS was so fed up with Tony Romo and was so tired of his contract and the bad feedback that they kept getting publicly and online about Tony Romo calling games. My conspiracy is that they planted for someone, they called an exact in CBS called in Tony Romo and said, reported, hey,

somebody's leaving a golf course, looks to have been under the influence, driving. I saw them leaving. Just wanted to call that in. And then they got flagged for the authorities to pick it up and they pulled him over. I think that's how bad they wanted to get out of his contract.

God, why did I kind of like Tony? Why did I kind of like him calling games? It'd be like you calling games? I thought the predictions, like of the plays was kind of sick. It kind of stopped, though. It kind of stopped like seven years ago, though.

Oh shit, he's been doing it that long? All right. This is going to be his 10th year on CBS. Damn, why did I think it was like his fourth? I know. Some of him happened with a time warp of COVID. And then I think we were all just so used to Phil Sims from our childhood that once they finally moved off of him and it was Romo, you're like,

whoa, whoa, this is, you know, he was so much, it was such a stark contrast from Phil Sims to Tony Romo. How long was his contract? This is the only shit. we talk about on this podcast. Sportscasters contracts. What? There's no way, dude. Did they resign him like a year ago?

I love when teams and like stations sign people for like 10 years. I'm like, bro, that is not going to work out. 10 years, bro. All the stuff that can happen in 10 years. All right. He's going to die or something. That's what CBS did. I think they gave him a 12 year deal.

He has. He hadn't even called... He hadn't even called a game. 12 years. Yeah, we were really confident in you, 12 years. He was straight off the field into the booth, 12 years. What could go wrong? Are you kidding me?

Dude, 12 years. 12 years. I just, it's a little to, like, I don't know, I just think that it's a little fishy because it had been boiling to a point where every week you were seeing on Monday, you know, awful announcing or some media, New York Times, somebody who covers media, have some op-ed about, well, Tony Romo really is just taking it in the teeth this year.

And you search them on Twitter and everybody's just like, oh, my God, Roma is so bad. I think CBS is kind of panicked. And I think they were like, hey, we, they had somebody tailing him and it was like, hey, we're going to get him right here so that, hey, we have an out. We have an out of this contract now. and we can just move old JJ Watt right up. And you're not really losing much star power.

And J.J. Watt's probably better in the booth at this point. So they just, they made it all happen. Good conspiracy, though. Hey, Clubhouse, you got one? Clubhouse conspiracies. New email segment. Get it down there in the comments on YouTube. What's your theory?

What's your conspiracy? And it could be sports. It could be anything. You got one? I don't have to do it. A conspiracy. I think liquid IV, you know, liquid IV. I think it makes your pee darker.

So you keep drinking it and buying more of it. Been dry, dude, I was house in liquid IV. Days, a little hungover, liquid IV. P's still yellow. What's going on? Keep house on more liquid IV. Going back to CVS for more. buying more and more.

It's just sugar, man. Just sugar in a bottle. I don't know. Dude, I'll never forget. That's off the top. This is the same shit. This is the same shit. I'll never forget when we first started working on Steichen together and we were doing espresso together and everything like the videos.

I would do chapstick a bunch. My lips are always dry. Chapstick a bunch like wintertime. You know, everything's cracking, cackling. And finally, Ben just goes. and just drink water. Stop using the chapstick. I was like, I got to, man.

He's like, yeah, what do you think? That shit's making your lips dry, so you keep using more chapstick. He's like, Coach Beasman telling me that forever. I was like, oh, my God. It's like, clubhouse conspiracies. I don't think I've used chapstick since. Don't need it. Clubhouse conspiracies.

What's another one like? Oh, lotion. Dude. It's the same thing with lotion and chapstick. Same guy. Dude, if you don't use lotion, your skin will just get used to it. It won't be chapped or it won't be dry.

Yeah, it's like what Jim Harbaal, different football coaches talk about with like calluses, you know, blisters and get physical, breaking in your skin. It's like, yeah, it needs that. Gotta have it. I mean, it's just not even,

you don't need it. There's a bunch of other ones like that. I think clubhouse will come up with some pretty good ones. But yeah, my stocking in Christmas has been a little bit emptier every year since because usually that was a go-to. Oh, dude, gum. Gum and mince make your breath worse. But how do you combat it? What are you doing besides just brushing?

Mouthwash? Mouthwash? Mouthwash is good. Mouthwash in the door of the car. Every red light, me. Nothing better than hitting some mouthwash. Game changer. Never.

I'll open my car door at a red light. I know. I might be getting a little too used to it now. That's kind of like me with Pepsiid. Tums. Oh, your body got used to Tums. My body got used to Tums. I'd switch.

So now it's just like, what do you do? It's gotten better because it's like the way that I eat now and everything. But, you know, it's still there. But Pepsid, hits a Pepsid. Yeah. Switched up a little bit. Pepsid not cutting it. Fat, Sats it.

big time, but it'll be proud of me, I think. Sunday night, brother-in-law's 30th birthday. What does he want? Hey, yo, what do you want? It's your 30th birthday.

What do you want for dinner? You choose. It's on you. You choose. Whatever you want to get. We'll all get. Well, you, says he wants chilies.

All right. So, you know, a lot of options. Cool. Trying to make everybody happy. Cool. Get chilies. You know, I'm looking.

I'm like, damn, a side of fries. You're at chilies? No. We're just ordered. You're ordered to go. Okay. Damn, the sliders of fries look great.

Damn, the honey, Chipotle chicken tender platter with fries looks great. Oh my God. The cassidillas of fries look great. You know what, though? I think I'm going to reel it in. I think I'm trying to get some margarita chicken with rice and some black beans.

Dude, once you conquer the restaurant menu and you can like, you can like order what you know you should have instead of what you want. Yeah. Whole, whole game changes.

Mm-hmm. Like once you start, stop getting the rodeo burger and you're like, I know how that's going to make me feel, bro. You know what I'm saying? There's always that one thing you want and you're like, but I can't, bro. I can't do it.

And it's always on a Sunday too. The guilt comes down on a Sunday. You just get the Fiesta salad. Mm-hmm. And then going to Monday with a dub. Think, think, yes. Think this goes back to Clubhouse. This goes back to when you're on the guys trip.

You're on the Bachelor trip. And it's that Thursday night when you guys all get in. Okay. You know that you want to go out with the boys and get blacked. And then wake up tomorrow because it's the Bachelor at party, right? Or the Bachelor party, right? You know you want to do that. But it's not what you should do.

See the big picture, man. See the big picture. There's times to F off. Sunday. Sunday when you're thinking of future cell. is not the time to F off. Exactly. You know, that's why, that's why, you know, Thursday night when you get in,

you take it easy that night, you pop up Netflix that they're having a little buzz at about 11 o'clock, you know, you sit there, you lay in your comfy bed, you get some rest. Then the next night, that's when you fucking blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. That's where it's the opposite. It's the opposite, though, on the weekends when it's just regular guy. You know, maybe Saturday for lunch or Saturday night. Let's go. What up?

College football prime times on. Whoa. What's that? Half rack of ribs. Side of macaroni. It's time to party. You earned it. Right.

But then Sunday, you flip it and you get the margarita chicken. Mm-hmm. Saturday, margarita. Sunday, margarita chicken. Saturday, margarita pizza. What else we got here? You see Victor Wimbunyama's Nike logo? I did

I don't know how that's going to translate sometimes like I saw a couple different looks of it and I was like I can't really like at first I was like I don't know what that is like what am I missing Then I saw it in the new one right The most updated the official Is that look like an alien head?

The VW but the silhouette Of it all Is is the alien head Yeah Hold on I'm going we're going dripping or tripping. I'm going dripping big time.

I love, love when someone like Nike or someplace like Nike is able to combine the initials or the number. And then also the kind of under the table thing that we all know him as, Victor Womenyama, you know, kind of this alien. Everybody talks about it being an alien, 7, 6, whatever. And they make that into, it's great. It's great. Way better than the old Victor Wenina logo. with the two Nike signs. Was that real or was that like fan art?

I think it might have been fan art because this official, this official stuff just came in. It's a pretty good one, honestly, I'm looking at it now. But at first glance, I'm like,

it just looks like two like pigeons or something. Yeah. I like it a lot. Are you anything? Probably not. No, no, definitely not. Hey, dripping or tripping

Bill's blue uniforms or Bill's gray uniforms. Hey, you know what? I was really proud of. Well, first of all, tripping, obviously. I was really proud of. I had a good amount of people either in the Discord or on DMs who would send.

They'd be like, yeah, put number, put number 73 in them. Put Dionne Dawkins in them. It's over. Bro, are we still actually doing gray uniforms? I cannot believe it. As if it's 2014. That's the most Boise State thing you could ever do With the sweat in the paneling and all that stuff

73 linemen Come on I can't believe I can't believe that that actually happened The helmet they could have I mean it could have we could have saved it with the helmet Like if the if the bills did what the Texans did like with the horn thing and they did it right Like that helmet could have been fire but it's like a little too small and the chin strap like disrupts it like big time. Totally.

I did see a fan art post though that replicated for other NFL teams if they did that style that the bills did with their helmet. It's a way to go. Very cool. Very cool. It's a way to go.

Like the Buccaneers was just red and just had the skull. They just had the skull from the flag on it on the side of it. I'm trying to think of a few of the other ones. It's the Titans one, man. The Titans one, they had the flame.

You know what I'm talking about? And it's just a flame on their helmets. I mean, that's old Titans, but like, God, I wanted that so bad. The two that I saw, Philadelphia just had the eagle eye. I don't know if you can beat the, what they got right now is kind of it, though.

And the Ravens has had the red eye. There it is. Yeah. I was like, okay. I can see the vision. Those are nice. They work for the, bills.

Don't think so. Don't think so. My phone's kind of blown up right now because it's MLB trade deadline. Not a baseball podcast. Hey. Not a baseball podcast. Feeling like Buster Only right now. What are they saying?

That's insane. Who did the Cubs get? Who did the Cubs get? Apparently we just traded for Kevin Gossman. He's a pitcher from, I think, the Blue Jays. But I don't know. We didn't get Terrick Scoobble. but it's big for you out there in LA, right?

Dodgers pulling in scoble. No clue, dude. Dude, you said MLB trade deadline. First name that came to mind was Greg Maddox. I was like, okay, wonder where he's going. Dude, I had no idea about MLB right now. I mean, do you think, but not even about the current one, but I got to say MLB trade deadline, still the best trade deadline?

Dude, there's some like power moves in the, MLB trade deadline. It's like the biggest stars. You're like, oh my God, Aaron? Like, do you see that on the bottom line? But I feel like when we were growing up, when baseball tonight was baseball tonight

with Carl Ravich and Peter Gammon's and Harold Reynolds, that was like that trade deadline. We're talking no more to the Cubs. What? Right. Like, are you serious? Like on some, is this April Fool's?

Like this is insane. There's no way. But now I feel as though NFL and the NBA have realized that. And they're trying to get in on the action. Now NFL trade deadline, we're like, see that to the Niners? It's a sexiest thing in sports when somebody gets traded. So it feels like, oh, like damn. Like it feels like like a like a relationship controversy.

or something. You're like, ooh, wait, he's going there? Like, I never even pictured that. Yeah, dude. Yeah, trade deadline for guys is, that's just our summer house. That's our, that's our little house lives of Orange County. Yeah. That's, that's our, that's our, uh, West West Wheaton or whatever his name is with, uh, summer house. Like that, that's the shit for us. Really? Oh my God. My wife. What happened? Oh, my God. What happened? We, we, we, we, we. We. We. We. We. Wee. That's when guys say wait. CMC the Niners, we.

Dude, that's when you actually do this to your wife and you're dead serious. Phone in hand. Yeah, hold up, hold up, hold up, hold up. Blockbuster trade in the NFL. But some of those trades, man, like, yeah, they have a lasting impact on you. That's some where were you type of moments.

Especially when you're a kid. Dude, when Nomar got traded to the Cubs At that time of my life Top 3 day of my life And it didn't even work out It didn't even work out He can't believe it He was hurt

He was past his prime But I was just still over the moon Because Nomar was like my god Nomar and Derek Jeter When we were younger I was like holy shit Those are my Nomar's on the Cubs dude

Like I could not believe it When my dad get my dad To try to check Yahoo You know back then They were like We didn't have Twitter or anything It was like Update the Yahoo Sports page

Update the on ESPN, right, with the special baseball tonight trade deadline special. You remember when they would do it, like the hour before the trade deadline was happening and it airing during a time that it did typically happen. Yeah, it was just like randomly on. Yeah, they slot it and you're like, oh my God, that's on. Yeah.

They like pushed aside their programming for this. Right, right, right. Dude, how about like back in that time, not a reminiscent podcast, but there weren't like uniform edits yet you know like you had to wait a week to see like your boy yeah on like you had to get like you had to hire like a Photoshop guy the NFL did to like make like him and like but now they do it like AI can do it yeah that's it's such a good point man because with all this stuff with LeBron with all the stuff with possibly Steph Curry with uh you know

when Rogers was going to different play when he was like going out to be a free agent like now there is there isn't that you see it right away like now you would always have that wonder of like oh my God what's he gonna look like what is no more going to look like in a Cubs uniform you have to wait and turn on WGN

now I've already seen Steph Curry in a heat Hornets Celtics jersey and it looks as you know like damn I guess that would be something and that's it it's all it is I know

you used to have to wait for that dude I don't know if this is a deep cut but NFL draft when your boy would get drafted you go to the Madden website

and they had them on the game and like a you know somebody would get like I'm trying to think like who

like Reggie Bush gets drafted to the Saints like you have no idea what that looks like you go on Madden.com Reggie Bush

is in a Saints uniform like on the game already. So you can kind of like get a picture. Dude, I used to do that all the time. No way. During the draft. Like, whoever the Steelers would draft.

Like, you'd see Ben Rothesberger like in a Steelers uniform in Madden like gameplay. And you'd be like, oh, dude, I used to do that all day. Man, I don't remember that. It would take forever to load.

It was back in the day. Dude. I remember I'd see half of Ben Rathesberger's picture for like seven hours. and I just got a random people it'd be like Eli Manning I was like oh my God it's probably just his feet too like his bottom half right

so it's like you know you get the good part like if it was his helmet and his shoulders you're like whoa damn dude I don't remember that at all yeah I don't know everybody's taking advantage of the trade deadlines

now but man 04 oh 5 like MLB that was that was it that was it that was it Are you sure that's real news? I know.

A trade is so big you think it's fake. Luca to the Lakers. I was like, this isn't real. This is a scam. I actually had to go to ESPN on TV to like make sure. That's one of those. No, no,

that's one of those where I woke up and had like 18 texts from the group chat, the high school group chat, you know, the group chat. Not you, I'm saying like everybody's got like the boys, right? That group chat.

I had like 18 or 20. I'm like, what the? Who died? That's a good one too. What was the biggest trade of your lifetime? I can remember Trent Richardson to the Colts. I was in college. I was in college playing football and like people were running around our locker room.

Like no way. Like crazy. And I wasn't even at the deadline. You remember those like week two? All of a sudden just out of nowhere. Those trades like freak me out a little bit. Those in season trades. I'm like,

Like, are you sure, dog? Like that's sauce gardener. Hey, next Trent Richardson. Oh. TG takes. But like trait. Hey, yeah. TG.

TG. TG. Hot takes. Soss Gardner. Bigger bus than Trent Richardson. Wow. Said it. Said it.

Manit. These guys. But, uh, yeah. What was the biggest trade of your lifetime in the comments? Dude, when Evan Turner, when the Pacers went, when they sent Danny Granger out, Brian Turner in, not a local pod. Damn, I don't remember that at all. That was so, I was so happy to get rid of Danny Granger.

He was so boring, bro. Yeah, there's some weird dark days with Pacers, where it was like we were pumped about him because he's like really all we had, but it wasn't. A local pod. Yeah. It just wasn't hot. That was like Pacers trying to like get a new reputation type of, you know what I mean? After like they were all like

Mouse at the Palace like You know I mean? Jamal Tinsley era They were like trying to rebrand a little bit I get it but like it was so boring Oh my God in the uniforms too I hated the Pacers then bro I'm like God

I'm like we just got Jeff Foster Out here still like bro's bro's a dog And like yeah yeah big role player But I'm like we got to get a little sexier on our team Please They literally did try to say okay, we are going to just be as bland cheese pizza as possible. Not a local pod, but like our guy was like yes, Acevicus.

I was like, this is not it, yo. Dude, yeah, the uniform, just the uniforms themselves. Those navy and whites that literally, the white said Pacers and the Navy just said Indiana and the most boring font, boring colors of all time. Like, why were the pay? I don't want to start. I don't want to talk about the Pacers, but like,

Hey. I feel like the Pacers thought they only had to draft guys from Indiana for like seven years. I'm like, dude, we don't have to get all these Indiana guys. We can go out of state, boys.

We're the NBA, you know? What about, hey, bring a topical. How about those Pacers now with the pent stripes, huh?

Hey, driven or tripping. Indiana Pacers gold pinstripe unis what do we think? Not a local podcast They did it Dripping

It is It actually is I'm not even saying that Because I'm like Low-key Pacers fan But like They did it right Like it's not

I mean you got to update the font It's a new Pacer's font You got to do that You can't go block It just wouldn't make sense Right now The stripe on the side That's like going with the Indiana

logo hard. Yep. It's beautiful. I am so happy and now I'm so, you know, I know we're all skipping ahead to Halloween because this isn't a holiday podcast, but, you know, it is like I'm just even more jacked for the season,

finally going to be healthy, got these uniforms, going to spend so much money on all that Pintstripe shit. Cannot wait. Well done, Pacers. Thank you. Dripping. Hey,

what about all the stuff on the internet that's like Halliburton, the king of New York? Dude, I love that. so much. The Knicks win the finals and all the talk on the internet is how Haliburton still owns the Knicks. I love it, yo. Well, do you see he got married this weekend? Yeah. And 50 cent was there? A run New York. Yeah, dude. Tyrese Halliburton, here's another event that's tied to me and Ben that we weren't invited to. Not that we would be, obviously. Not that we'll shout out, DJ Seabuck,

our resident DJ here who does Indiana land with us. He was there. Uh-uh. Yeah, Tyrese Halliburton getting married over the weekend and 50 Cent shows up, performs at the reception. And so now it's going all over the internet of Tyrese Halliburton up there 50 Cent singing, run New York. And of course, they're all pissed New York folks and the Knicks. But next thing, again, not a local pod, not harping on the pitch. Pacers too much, but rumor has it, Indiana Pacers at New York Knicks, noon Christmas Day, Madison

Square Garden. Finally. Yeah. Oh, my God. Christmas Day, NBA is special. I know, I know, I know this is not a football podcast. This is not sports podcast. But I do have, like, love in my heart for Christmas Day, NBA.

All that was going to happen this past year, Tyresellab. blows his leg out. So I got all put on, like the uniforms are going to happen last year. The Knicks Pacers was going to happen at Christmas Day last year. I had to delay at a year. But now we just got the uniforms officially. And I don't know when exactly the full schedule really says for the NBA, but it's looking like fully healthy Halliburton and the Pacers going back into Gotham City,

Massan Square Garden to take on the defending champs. So now what I'll be doing Christmas Day. That's for sure. Probably not watching it. You know what I'll be doing? Watching the NFL. No. Watching the NFL on CBS, which leads us to our guest now on the today on NFL on CBS, the pregame show, James Brown, Chris or Bill Cower, Kyle Long, Russell Wilson, Nate Burleson, noon every Sunday.

Here he is. Kyle, Kyle, Kyle. All right, our next guest, joining the clubhouse was the first round pick. The Chicago Bears of 2013. He was an all pro in 2014, a three-time NFL pro bowler. He's been named a top 100. Greatest Chicago Bear of all time.

And starting this fall, we're going to catch him at 12 Eastern. Every Sunday on the legendary NFL today on CBS. It's Kyle Long. Yeah. What's going on, guys. Thank you. That was like,

that's unbelievable. You know, offensive linemen are not supposed to get an intro. This is supposed to be like, This guy survived, and he's here to talk to us about it. Well, look at the list of accolades right there, man. We have to. It's a lot of flowers to give.

You didn't list of personal fouls, conduct and detrimental to the teams, meetings I missed, teammates that probably can't stand my ass and coaches that wanted to run me out long before I ever was. That's why we love you, baby. Who would be some of the coaches who are running you out or teammates who can't stand you? Are you allowed to give those names? Gosh, well, I mean, if you just go look at every coach I ever had, that's a good place to start for guys who are like, fuck this number 75 guy. He's a real dickhead. You know what? There's so many different types of people in the NFL. And like, you imagine that there's one archetype of like offensive linemen, you know, smart, tough, loves lifting weights, maybe goes fishing. No, no, no. There's a million types of o'alignment. There's guys like myself that walk into the room. And, you know, you got to be. be like, do you even have a pencil today? And then there's some guys that are ready.

They could teach and install the offense. They could get rookies up to speed. I was a guy you didn't have to worry about when I put my hand in the ground. When the game started, I was never a captain. If that tells you the kind of guy that I was in the building, I was a player. That was it. Okay. I think like year seven, they put me on the leadership council.

I shut up. I was like, what the fuck am I doing here? Like, get me out of this room. And all the serious guys are at the table talking about. the world's problems, and I'm like, I can't keep a straight face. So there were some coaches that didn't appreciate that. There was one in particular by the name of Harry Heastand, who is a legendary offensive line coach. Okay. Like, if I had this guy when I was 17 as opposed to 32, maybe my attitude would have been a little bit different. And I might have had a gold jacket by now.

So these are the guys that he coached, okay? Quentin Nelson, Zach Martin, Mike McGlensie A big Notre Dame guy Ronnie Stanley yeah he was the Notre Dame guy and before that he was the O-line coach with the Bears

he's an old school NFL coach Olin Crutes Big Cat Williams those kind of guys glass eaters real two-a-day guys I was a post-CBA two-day guy

I was like my finger hurts I don't know if I can practice and some of those coaches they did not like that at all and I would imagine some teammates too yeah well what was his name

Harry. It's how Harry he's saying the best like unbelievable teacher of football I was just so old and beat up

relative to a lot of the guys he's been with and I just didn't have enough gas in the tank and you know I resented myself

a little bit for that and I was probably a dickhead at the end and I've covered that before that was like

the end of naggy yeah Harry Heistan that guy right there you show up to one of his individual periods

you better to bring two fucking chin straps buddy okay because this guy's coming and you better put the baby powder on in the in the groin because there's no stopping there's no downtime you're going but we we were ready to go

Harry East Dan had us ready I got to ask because we talk about it on this show quite often and you may have seen some clips of it but from the the longest time that you can remember

that you've been on this earth has your dad always had a flat top. 1,000% Oh, hold up, hold up. Have you ever had a flat top? When I was 12, I think. I went with my dad on a work trip. And we went.

You could set a cup of coffee. And I always had like the buzz cut, like the Caesar cut. You know what I mean? Like the classic, yeah. If Eminem grew his hair out for a month, that would be like what my hair looked like.

And helmet head, right? Like just a buzz cut that got too long. And then one time my dad was like, we should change it up. You should try it to something. And then I was like, what kind of hairstyle do you think I should go with? He's like, we should try to slink it back. And I was like, all right. I remember I went to like, well, my dad doesn't use any product.

He just wakes up and it stands up like that. Oh, yeah. I'm telling you. Like if his hair was longer, he would have that perfect brush back into a mullet. You know what I mean? Yeah. He would have the ideal mullet. But he cuts it.

to where it just, it swoops up and it stays there. When I was like 12, I put way too much gel in my hair and I stood it up. And that was like a one day experience and I was done. I was done with that. Another piece of advice he gave me seventh grade, sixth grade, first day of sixth grade, first day of sixth grade. I got a ride to school with the neighbors who had a bunch of daughters. They're all beautiful, really nice girls. And I was really excited.

I was really excited about going school that day. And dad was like, here's the. trick you're going to tuck your because it was like a button college shirt tucked into khakis dress code type deal Catholic school you're going to tuck your shirt in and it's going to be so secure you want to know why we're going to tuck it into your undies today. Oh. So I took the shirt all the way into the undies and I'm like ready to go like like army ranger ready to go on a mission brother. I was ready for sixth grade or whatever. And I got out in the carpool line with, you know, the older sister drove us to school. And she was like, Kyle, your underwear is hanging

out. My underwear was like three inches above my pants. The fruit of the looms are. I was out there. I had a hard time, okay, at that point in my life. Did you, I was going to say, did your brother, like, he just seems like the ultimate Disney bully brother back when he's like, like because they're your four years apart right so he was like on a different building on the same campus so i never really saw him except for like i'd go watch his games on front that's my brother but like we didn't my younger brother howie and i are 12 months apart and he he was that lax pro he was our quarterback he was johnny mansell before johnny manzell okay he was like six feet tall buck 80 talk mad shit uh state champion twice all that stuff but he would talk shit and hide behind me

okay sure that's the one you got to watch howie june he played he played lacrosse at uva um savage what happened to no no if like what why it was so you and then and then and then and then you and then why howie the third one i think they just ran out of names so they didn't want to do chris and his middleman is hard right but they didn't want to do howie to start and then all of a sudden they're like yeah third one we'll go with it's been a really dodgy topic that we bring up often and like we can never get a straight answer from our dad or our mom for that matter yeah but i'm so glad that i'm not how i'm not howie and chris is probably happy he's not howie i mean for a while i've been trying to convince people that i'm not chris or or jake long people think is me i'm like

oh my god for the longest time i thought that jake was one of you guys everybody had to right turns out that they dropped the O on the end of Jake Long's family's name when they got to Ellis Island. He was an Italian background guy. And Long, our long, I believe it's, you know, I want to say like Scottish Irish. There was a couple last names that blended ended up being long. But Long go, not us, very Italian, Jake Long. And we have had that conversation. I actually played with Jake Long's younger brother, Joe.

He was like a practice squad guy with the Bears. And then at the end of Jake's career, he came and had a workout with the Bears. It was kind of like a full circle. We did the Spider-Man meme. Like, you've been the guy that everybody thinks is me and me, you. Yeah, I don't know. Just for all that time when, because wasn't Jake and Chris like coming out in the same draft? Jake Long, first pick, Chris Long, second pick.

I have to understand. I understand why it's confusing. Yes, and then they played. Yeah. Hell yeah. I watched it on TikTok the other night. I was like, dude, this is the best. I love those old, they're like, you know,

two first, top two picks going against each other and their rookie years. I remember that like it was yesterday. Yeah. Do you remember the, I remember when Andrew Luck and Robert Griffin, the third went against each other, but it was just preseason, I think. You guys remember this?

It still wasn't fair. Wasn't fair. Not a fair fight. This week, isn't it? Oh, fame game this Thursday night. Are you going to be out there? No, but I think my old man and my mom are going to be there because they go every year for the new inductees.

And it's also like the coolest fraternity ever, getting to see all these guys with watermelon domes just hanging out with gold jackets. You look fucking great. Dude, I can't imagine those handshakes, crippling hands. Biggest hands up. Ah. Yeah, all their fingers just crooked and winning different directions. It's like it's not like going to your high school reunion where there's a bunch of people posturing.

It's like these guys are like, I'm not, you guys familiar with Halo. Like they're all like master chiefs. Okay. There's no reason to have any like being self-conscious or thinking, you know, what's he thinking about? No, you're all the best. Okay. And I can't even imagine going to one of those. things and just being like, what's up?

You know, it's kind of like the golf content creators get to go to the ACC, American Century Classic and Tahoe. I fucking love that, okay? But that's got to be what that's like. Just a bunch of cool people hanging out, right? And we don't get those invites, you know what I'm saying? No. But that's a special breed, you know, Canton and Lake Tahoe, special breeds.

Did you ever growing up, like, did you, did you, did you, were you around, like the Fox NFL? Did they do, like, cookouts? Did you guys offset? Would there be, like, cook? accounts that you guys would show up to and Terry Bradshaw would be like toss to the pig skin. That's a great question, actually, because the gentleman who started it all with Fox NFL Sunday is an Australian man named David Hill, who I have known since very early 90s.

I was like five years old. And David Hill was the one that I think, you know, I'm probably going to butcher this, but they started Fox's coverage with the crew that was James Brown. my dad, Terry Bradshaw. The OGs, baby. And I believe it was Jimmy Johnson. Yep. And that was the crew that I knew for a very long time.

And in the time that he's been at Fox, Collinsworth has come in and gone. The comedians on that show have been amazing. Caliando. Yeah. Calliando was great. And then they had Rob Riggle for a bit. They had a number of guys who have gone on and done huge things.

Jimmy Kimball was on there. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Who is the weather lady? Gin, Hale, Jen. I remember, yeah, she was, she was amazing. Okay. It was like an eight-year-old kid. I'd come in there and she'd be like, Kyle, give me a hug.

I'd be like, she was awesome. Okay, she was fantastic. But back to David Hill. So David Hill was like, I have a vision for what I think a football show is supposed to be like. And then I saw this guy, Howie Long's head. And I was like, that's what a football player looks like. that's what I want to tell me about football.

And then he heard Terry Bradshaw talk. And he was like, that's an American football player. And I want to hear him go. And like, he could be passionate. And Jimmy Johnson, who's more passionate than Jimmy Johnson about the game? Oh, yeah. And then James Brown, the consummate guy who now, full circle is the host on our show on the NFL today. So when you hear James Brown, say, my nephew over there makes a great point or something like that, that's me.

I'm related to James Brown. Yeah. But back to the cookout. So my first experience getting to meet these guys, David Hill had everybody come out to his house in like somewhere in a beautiful part of Los Angeles. And I remember there was a giant tennis court and it was Christmas time. It was like all the families came for Christmas. And it was my first memory of getting to meet these guys. And the thing that stands out to me with my relationships of all of them, I forget how famous some of these guys are because they're just like, Terry, I call Terry.

I'm like, I hope you're working out. I see you like you don't get run over quick. You know, like we talk. He calls me and he's like, you look like shit, man. You didn't get into the wait room or something like that. That's Uncle Terry, bro. Okay. So that's my life has been more about coverage of the NFL and the locker room that is the pregame desk than it is about being a player.

I always saw being a player as a way to get to where I wanted to go. And you can't get on those desks unless you've played the game in a high. high level. And even a guy like me, I sit next to Hall of Famers and Super Bowl champions. I don't have any of that stuff. I haven't sure. I have passion. Greatest bear ever? Yeah, well, they keep making bears. So I'm going to keep going down that lift. But okay, so you said, I mean, that was the goal. Like you, you didn't necessarily look at it as like, hey, I want to be grid irons so I can have all those accolades. That's my way to be on TV to do my first three years in the league. I was a first three years. I was a

first round pick. I got lucky enough because of a huge fan base in Chicago to be an alternate in the Pro Bowl. Somebody backed out. So I got credit for a Pro Bowl my rookie year. Second year, I was actually a dude. And I made, you know, second team All-Pro. Third year, I think third year we had an offensive tackle. They got cut or injured in camp. And I said, I'll switch to tackle. I was a guard. I was an all-pro guard that switched to tackle. And I had a decent run at it, ended up making like a sympathy, alternative. alternate as a pro bowl tackle because they were like this is an all pro that's playing out of position type shit we've seen we've seen guys like tunis switch out to to uh to tackle when his team needs them and i was kind of like i'm down for that i'm going to get paid either way and if i play some tackle they might pay me as a tackle yeah so that year happened i did okay the next year i was like fuck that i'm going back to guard and i was like locked in okay felt like batting four hole again, exactly where I'm supposed to be hitting bombs. And then I got my leg landed

on like week eight. And my ankle blew out completely. It was facing the wrong way. We were down in the day. Got that sad fox music to commercial. And that was the first time where I said what is the plan? Because I'm looking

in my fucking leg and I'm like that could happen four more times before I'm done all over. And it did. I broke my neck, played with a fusion, both shoulders. UCL tear, broke my leg on my left side. I've been battered. But I knew that if I just stuck it out and I kept building my resume, and when people didn't want to go talk at the podium after hard losses,

I was saying, I'll go do it and I'll take the blame. And I'll say, I miss these fucking blocks. And people will say, God, that guy probably, you know, I'm glad he's not lying to me or sugarcoating it because I'd be like, I was dog shit today. Jay Cutler got embarrassed because of my embarrassment as an offensive. I'd be like, Matt Forte should have had 200, and it was my fault that he didn't.

And if you look at play 30s, the double doink, for example. I remember everybody wanted to ask about the double doink. I was like, look at the eight plays before the double doink. That could have all resulted in explosive plays. That could have all moved the sticks. That could have moved us from a 43 left hash to a 29 right hash or maybe a touchdown over the time.

People pick and choose these plays, and you have an opportunity to be honest with the fans. do it because like you guys watch the game okay like you're not missing that stuff um and you're not fooling anybody and and i think it's a good it's a good place to start for you know and i'm talking to the panthers in a couple weeks about transitioning into media or doing some media while you're in it because as you guys know like why wouldn't you do that why wouldn't you get your feet wet get comfortable with it and that's what i've done i can't get a job at merrill lynch i'm not going back to college.

LinkedIn. I have crippling anxiety and ADD. But the one thing that I do when I'm with like-minded people and I watch football, I become on fire. And I love doing that. And I want to be in everybody's house on Sunday with my friends. And I want to fucking tell you what I see. And if you don't like it, tell me.

Great. I've heard that before. Do you feel like, I'm jumping ahead a little bit here, But do you feel like in today's day and age, like when you're on TV talking, you're coming up on the big show here, on the noon pregame show, is it in your head at all that's like, I got to make a good clip content here. I got to kind of speak in clips so it can then live online. Is that going through your head at all so you can make more of an impact? Or are you just trying to lock in and tell it how it is? This is a very, very slippery slope that some people can navigate those waters better than me.

I don't bring notes on the desk I don't bring an iPad on the desk Organic I watch the games that are on the TV I listen to what my buddies say and I form my opinions like any other ADD person does in the moments

and if I come out and say something that sounds a little too smooth you're like this fucking guy read that in the mirror last night What a dork I do not want to be that guy and if I'm working with you guys and you do that I'll say

how many takes Benny Did you get that in the first one last night? You watched the NBA on T&T or like Chuck and Check? Those guys don't prepare anything. It's the best show in the history of shows. Okay. It's just so top of mind now, though, because that's what everything is. There's points I want to make.

Okay. And I'm going to use George Pickens as an example. I happen to think there's about four guys in the next. National Football League that I would pay a premium week to week to watch just on pure entertainment value. Now, you guys probably have some guys in mind as well. And I'll put Miles Garrett on the defensive side of the ball. But then guys like Mahomes when they're healthy, playoff Mahomes or Lamar when he's Lamar. And then this guy, George Pickens, in my opinion, does things just differently. Okay. He may not be the best receiver in football. He's the most entertaining.

There have been times during my fandom of George Pickens where I have used my platform on CBS. and have said when your most talented guy is your most unpredictable guy, it speaks about, you know, the hard line that you have to dance is being constructively critical of somebody and not as a person. And sometimes I've gotten in trouble where I've really felt something as a teammate. And I said, I can feel what's going on in that locker room. Like you guys have heard stories come out of the Philly locker room. And I'm sure you've been like, well, if I'm in that situation, this is how I would react. For whatever reason, the picking stuff stuck out to me. I don't know if it's because I played with a guy like Brandon Marshall, who was one of the most incredibly talented people I've ever played with and a sweet guy, honestly.

But, you know, sometimes you had to snap and be like, Brandon, lock in. Like, can you imagine an offense with C.D. Lamb and George Pickens that are locked in? Because I know Dak Prescott's locked in. I don't know. I just, I'm on a tangent. But there's shit that I look for that other people might not look for and there's shit that people see and notice that go right over my head because it's not important to me in football.

But that's why there's five of us. That's why Bill Cowers there. He sees it from a head coach. Russell Wilson sits right next to me. He sees it from a quarterback CEO, superstar perspective. And then Nate Berluson is a guy who's done it all, play with some of the best guys in the history of the league. I mean, he lined up with Calvin Johnson for a number of years.

of the stories. Randy Moss, too, I think. Randy Moss. Some of the stories that he has are just unbelievable. We all attack it from a different perspective. You're speaking of rehearsing things. You think Russell Wilson's got a few lines ready to break out there for a week one. He's like, clip that. I think that people are going to be amazed at how impressive Russell Wilson is in a suit talking football and being excited about football because here's a guy who's committed like so much to the game of football and sports. And now like me, he's out of the game and he's got to figure out where to pour himself into. And I can tell you this, he's not a guy that knows how to just chill.

Like he is going to pour himself into it. Just like Tom Brady in the booth. Like there is no staying the same for Tom Brady. He will continue to get better until he is one of, if not the best. I don't know if you guys agree or not. but there are people whose minds are a little bit more dialed in on being grinding. And Russell Wilson is such a hard worker and so prepared. I'm excited.

I think everybody's going to be like, holy shit, he is amazing at TV. Everybody hated on him. Everybody hated on Russell Wilson for that Subway commercial. The Dangerous? I thought he crushed that. And also Sub pretty good. Like, I still go to Subway and get that. He still got the data.

The research is his product. I'm actually wearing an Outlaw light shirt right now. It's a fantastic beer that he's a partner in. Really good beer. Outlaw beer. He sent me a bunch of T-Short him I like beer. He's like, I'll send him a palette of beer. Like a ton of beer and like 20 Outlaw shirts.

I am just an Outlaw poster boy now. Dude, speaking of that, I actually, back in February, speaking of beer, back in February out in San Francisco, found myself at a little dive bar drinking garage beer. the Kelsey Brothers beer with your brother, Chris, and it was great. I was just out there with, it was like Chris Long,

Joe Thomas, uh, Jason Kelsey, all these huge ass dudes and I'm just like, oh, it was crazy, man, but we got to make that.

We got to have some outlaw beer with you at some point. Huddled up. Huddled up. Hey, anytime. And I live in, I just moved up to Connecticut, which is right outside of New York City.

And superstars like you guys, I'm sure, find yourselves in the city often. So whenever you're up here, let me know. That's a good plug. Love to have you out to the studio anytime. I think I get like a guest pass or two. I'm not sure how that works, but I'll find out.

And we'll make it happen. You're not booting this off here, right? I'm not. I'm just saying. We got to go. All right. So while we're on the topic of having beers, let's get that on the, you know. On the schedule. Yes. Okay. Perfect. I'm always amazed at how quickly offensive linemen lose weight

when they retire from the NFL. Did you lose a bunch of weight? I feel like you could still play, though. I don't know how many plays in a row, Benny, but I was at Bears practice the other day, and I was like, fucking A, I could go crush one of these guys. You could kick step out.

Not two plays in a row, bro. At my heaviest, I weighed 352 pounds in the league. What are you right now? At my all pro weight, I was 320. I weigh about 288. right now. Solid lean. How'd you lose it?

Stress and anxiety, buddy. That it, baby. I noticed you're bald. I'm like, okay. Honestly, there we go. I shaved it at 21. Can you not get it back at all? The long hair gene missed you?

I just was like, this is my look now. That's your look. I like it. So I'll tell you this story. NFL Combine, before the 2013 draft, I had a room. made by the name of Brian Schwanky who was a Cal bear, he was the center for Cal.

He had a beautiful ponytail like, uh, like total Taekwondo ponytail, bro. White guy with a ponytail, dangerous. You know what I'm saying? Like Steven Seagal. Don't mess with him, bro. Don't mess. Steven Segalish. But he, and he's also a Berkeley guy, real smart. So he was my roommate.

And I was a hat guy all day, all the time. Sleep in a fitted hat. Like, go on a date with a fitted hat. Um, and if they say, hats in the club. I'm like, we ain't going to the club tonight, boys. Hat guys. Hat guy podcast. So I show up to the, I show up to the combine

with this fucking rat's nest of a hairdo. Okay. It's like the cold, the full cul-de-sac. Oh, no. Ryan Swanky finally sees me in the room with my hat off and he goes, what are you going to do about that tomorrow? And I was like, what do you mean, bro?

And he goes, you're not allowed to wear hats. We run in our underwear and shirts and cleats. That's it. Okay. So like, America's going to see that. He goes, what are we going to do about that? I was like, fuck. And this was before, like, Instacart or Insta? I was like, so we got to go down to CVS, brother,

and get some razors. And I got a couple of razors, and he helped me shave my head. Yeah. And I ran like the fucking wind at the senior ball. And I was like, or at the combine. I was like, I'm never changing this. And also, there are no other options once you go.

The mock three turbo, dude. Mach three from Gillette. That's it. That's the best one. That's the best one. You ever think. about getting a hair transplant? No. He knows a guy.

Yeah, me neither. Finney knows a guy. I think it's diminishing returns, Benny, because people know me as this look, beard, shaped, yeah,

you don't want to go the Erlacker, the Erlacker route. Erlacker. I did the, I did the ESPN radio show that Erlacker was on forever with Waddle and Sylvie,

which is like a huge show. Oh, yeah, I used to listen to that. Those are my guys, okay, and then they had the Jay Cotler show. And when Jay stopped

showing up for that. I filled in and they still had the Jay Cutler banner, but I was there every week which was fun. One week they were like, we have a special guest coming Kyle to this, you know, bar and Munderland that we're going to do this radio show out of. We can't wait to have you. I was like, okay, awesome. And I was like in all pros of time. I was super excited.

I'm not going to get Trump. Nobody's going to trump me at the radio show. Brian Erlacher comes in with a hat on. And then he takes his hat off. And it was the big reveal that Brian Erlacker had gotten hair. And I'm sitting there as a 22 year old balder than a fucking baby. and Brian's got a fresh cut of hair

And he's like, I'm sorry, buddy. He had met me a couple times. He was like, I'm really sorry that this. He's like, you know, this is part of the deal, I think. Like, it was like a paid event for him. And they laughed at me.

Waddle and Sylvie just thought it was so funny. I'll never forget that. But I ain't changing, brother. I ain't changed. No, I dig it. Yeah. It's you got to, hey, man, yeah, you're a big TV guy, you know?

You got to have the brand, you know? It's like SVP's got the bald and the glasses. Yes. You've got the bald in the beard. I've got the glove. glasses in the hat. Like, you just, I get it. You got to, McAfee's got the cut off in the black jeans.

Everybody's got a hat. He's got the Stallone thing going on, you know? Yeah, a little bit, for sure. Don't know what they said? He's the next Stallone. Can we talk about our guy, Patty Macbatch? I love McAfee, by the way. Well, that's actually where me and been interned with McAfee back in 2017 for McAfee, for

McAfee. That's actually where I met my wife when he had retired and started the Barstool branch. So, yeah, we go. way back with Patty Mac. It's wild to think about, I still, it's wild to think about for me now that I may not be married

or have two kids right now if Pat McAfee hadn't retired. Without that. Yeah. Who would you be? It's really crazy. What do you mean? Without,

without the internship, who would you be? God knows, man. It'd probably just be like falling you around to L.A. or something, Ben, or I don't know. You'd have two bald or some shit.

Two hair transplants. Yeah. Right. Kyle, we asked our first two guests a similar situation like this, and I got to ask you. Let's go back to April spring break of 2008. Kyle Long is on spring break with the boys. What? Fort Myers.

What CD and what song? Damn, son, where'd you find this? Yeah. Hell yeah. Kyle Long is a trapaholics guy? The trapaholics. It would be little Wayne. anything remixed.

I like my beak down low with my window slightly cracked. See me ride real slow. Yeah. If you like a can, wood, there is nothing like low way from that. Mix tape Wayne was like messy. Okay.

Like, people don't get it. Every ring. He was more marijuana. He was more Maradonna out there, man. Yeah, man. with that. And then his laugh and shit would come in.

Oh, man. I can only imagine your desktop computer, man. Just viruses. From down the little way. Lime wire. Baird wire. Frost wire. Yeah, baby.

You knew. All right. So you got that going. All right. So then what, what fit is 08? April 08, Kyle Long got on while he's listening to that. I got to press reverse for a second. And it is and always was 50 cent, okay?

Oh, okay. So not like, little way and mixed face, but like if I had to pick a guy that was just like, if I had to attach the 2008 athletic mentality to a performer, it was 50 cent, okay? 50 cent. We also were big young buck guys, okay?

Straight out of cash bill. Shorty want to ride with me. Oh, buddy, okay. A lot of heads were busted into that shit right there. I'm not sure they want to ride with me. Dude, that's your cool. Nobody talks about Young Buck anymore. Can we give some respect to Young Buck?

Thank you. How good was Lloyd Banks, too? I swear. Okay, what's your next question, Joey? I'm so sorry. You're good. I keep going about 08, 09 Rappers. This is fantastic.

No, my question was, if you got the 50 cent, if you're in the car and you got the 50 cent or the Lowell Wayne bumping and Fort Myers on spring break, what fit you got on? What clothes is Kyle Long in 2008 wearing? This is fucking hilarious because there was only one brand of jeans your boy could fit in. Okay.

If you had any large friends, they wore a brand either called Academics or LRG. Do you remember those jeans that had all the shit on the line? Those are at JCPenney. JC Penny upstairs. I remember that. So we went to a store in town called Seville Players to get our jeans, guys that were built like me. Okay. I had giant khakis that I wore it.

to school with wheat timbs and an oversized polo. Oh, you're the Timbs guy? Oh, bro. Wheat Tims. Okay. And I laced mine up tight. I wasn't being a cool Tim's guy. I was like, the laces are tight on those timbs.

That's interesting. But yeah, if we were going anywhere, I was wearing like one of those, remember the T-shirts that had the bacon neck before Haynes came out with like bacon neck technology? thick neck and then like box shirts that you'd sweat through and they would just be like heavy you know I'm talking about okay I was going to say that's what I was wearing like a white tea yeah like white tees yeah but I wore a black teeth right because you're sweaty so you're a sweaty guy you're you yeah you had Chris was a white and I'll call them tank tops Chris wore tank tops a lot and I was a

t-shirt guy because I was I was ashamed of my physical. Zique. Okay. Chris was like, Pat McAfee, he wants to shut the guns off. If you want to laugh, go look at my brother's

rivals picture. His neck. Right now. I'm going to pull it up on my phone right now. Is he doing this with his head? Like every football player?

Time out. Time out. It's better than you think. While you do that, I do got to say, I don't think I've ever seen a stronger, more chiseled jawline

than Chris Long. And I saw it in person in San Francisco. I was like, God damn you, man. You know he got that surgically heightened, right? Dr. Miami. No.

Yeah, yeah, he did. I was going to say, come on. He was born with it. He's a Howie long. He's a Howie long, uh, offspring. Come on, man. You guys got that, that jaw, that jostle jaw on, the long jaw. Chris, uh, my dad spit Chris right out of his mouth.

I'm like, they look at this name. They're white D.Ns. Okay. And they play hard. They're really smart. Kind of talk the same? They're similar. Yeah.

I'm hearing a lot of it when I'm listening to green lights and then when I've turned on Fox, I'm like, that's the same voice. Don't tell Chris, don't tell Chris he sounds like dad. He'll be like, oh, God. If somebody told me that I sounded like my dad, I'd be like, huh, look at that. That's cool. Yeah, you'd have to tell Chris that it's like, no, that's like, to find his rivals picture, bro.

That's like soothing to all of us. I can't imagine. I can't imagine how much trouble you guys got in grown up, like in your house. Did your dad just ever kick your ass? No, no. We never got, uh, we never got our ass kicked, but the threat of the ass kick and was always there. So he was obviously on the weekends.

He was in LA doing the show during the season. So he would leave Saturday, get back Sunday really late. But I remember a couple times as a youngster, my mom calling us all in in front of the speaker phone in the kitchen, you know, like there was one phone in half. And my dad would be like, if your mother calls me one more time, I'm going to be on the first flight out of this fucking city on the way. By the way, we must have been coachable because that never happened. But the threat of it was always like, you know. Was there ever like a punishment?

Like, do you ever get in trouble? And your dad just came like in pads? Because I remember my dad's a football coach. So I had a lot of like a lot of like crazy. Coach speed. Yeah. I, when we go to Montana every summer since I was a baby and we were on a lake up there.

And when I was, I didn't start playing football until I was 16 or 17. But both my brothers played when they were like Pop Horner, all that stuff, right? I was baseball basketball. You're a baseball guy. I was a theater kid. Okay.

So a little show choir? I'm getting Oklahoma musicals. Okay. Okay. Joseph in the Technicolor Dreamcoat. Yeah. Let's go. So we go to Montana.

I'm getting ready to play football for the first time. And my dad was like, go check out the garage. I got something in the garage for you. And I go into the garage. He's like, bring your younger brother. And he's going to help you with it. I was like, all right, what the fuck is this? And I go to the garage.

And we have like a, we bought an old cherry farm. It's got an 18 wheeler garage that they used to put the, you know, the pickers would. put the big thing in there. He turned it all into a gym. And the first piece of gym equipment in 2006, when I first started five, when I first started playing football, was like a 30-foot-long on-rails lead sled that you could load up with like 500 pounds. And you had to drive it up the rails. And at the top, you could boom, lock it out.

Yeah. And he was like, Howie, my younger brother, he was like, Howie. before you guys can do anything today, big guys got to run this thing up there and lock it out, you know, 20 times, whatever the arbitrary number was. And my younger brother was the quarterback.

So of course he's invested in me like fucking this thing up. And we would be in there and he would just be dog. And he's like, I will tell him that you didn't finish. Like, I will tell him that you only did seven. Like I swear to God, I will.

Like, get back on that fucking slip. I know, we'll never forget that. So my dad never punished me, but he put my brothers in position to hold us accountable. And then obviously, like, fatigue makes cowards of all of us. And that's a Jimmy Johnson saying. And that's one thing my dad repeated to me all the time. There was like, those are the two things.

In football, he said, fatigue makes cowards of all of us and come off the ball. Like, be the first guy off the ball. You know what I mean? Fuck, yeah. That's great. Football is easy, bro. Like the rest of my head. That's in my head when I'm out of red light.

I'm like, I got to be the first guy off the fire off. That thing turned on. I'm like, no full stage. I'm edging the crosswalk, dude. Were you a dip football player? Did you ever dip during games? You're so dip. You're dip.

You're dip right now. Yeah, I was like, there's something in there. My dip sense is tingling. What are we doing? Copenhagen during the games? What's up? A little winter green? I only dip.

The long cut of the year that has the American flag on it. And this year it's Copenhagen. Most O-Linman shit ever. American flag. Speaking of O-Linman shit, this happened at the high school I went to. Our O. Lineman, since they couldn't like leave the game and go to the bathroom and they be hydrating all week. They would just pee their pants during the game. Did you do that?

Piss dogs, man. I gained so much respect. Like, people think is gross. I was a leaker. Like, I'd be like, I'm just going to leak just to get the, you know. You're like, if you're in traffic and you're like, oh, my God, I got to piss my pants. And you just can get a little bit out. And you're like, okay, that buys me 10 minutes.

You know what I'm saying? That's what I would do on the field. But I had teammates that were like, I'm opening the drain, buddy. Like, yeah. Let it ride. They didn't get a muddle just rolling their eyes back. And I'm like, I don't think he's stroking out. I think he's just pissing his pants.

Even the center. quarterback's quarterback's hands felt like piss for two weeks that's like hell they're so shitty all the time geez fucking sinners

just pissing all over him Roberto Garza was our center he was a when I got to the league he was a 13 year veteran who had one ACL okay

he was the he was when the Madden made a made like a Latin American version of Madden Like they re-released the game with Roberto Garza on the.

So like I played with the Superman of offensive line. One ACL 13 years. Grew up in Brownsville, Texas. This is a guy that was like in the fields before school at 4 a.m. And then like in the field after school. Trench dog. Those are the Gs that I came into the league with. And that's why like all this shit, you're like, oh, you piss your pants, you dip, you blah, blah, blah.

All this stuff was just like, yeah, so? Yeah, nothing to them. No, for sure. They used to go to training camp for six weeks, two a days, fully padded practice, inside run, goal line, like pads still wet from this morning type shit. You know how to it. High school. Yeah, that's like, I can smell. High school.

Yeah, no thanks. Kyle got, well, actually real quick. Longs versus Manning's. And the football family Eschlon and family feud In a cage fight In family feud? Yeah

I got us I got us and family feud I'm taking a longs And smart fellas That's including we go Yeah we go We go your pops We got my mom too right

Sure you can have the whole family Yeah yeah yeah And it kind of works out perfectly Because it's like you guys are like You guys are the grizzly version Of the mannings in my mind Because you got the two brothers Who played in the NFL

You got the third brother who didn't play in the NFL, but is still hell of an athlete. The dad, who's a Hall of Famer, a mom who seemingly, you know, the major art, she's around, there's a mom, she's ready to go, right? She raised the boys. So family feud, Long's got the mannings, okay? What about like, what about like in Cheaper by a Dozen, too, where they do like the Bakers against the Murtax?

You know, it's kind of like a family decafalon. I never saw Cheaper by the Dozen, but it's one of those movies that I'm like, I should have probably seen it. But look, I'm with you. The mannings are unbelievable. And the more I see of Cooper Manning, the more I'm like, he's climbing up the power rankings of the mannings that I like.

Like, I used to love Peyton. And then I met Eli in person. And I was like, gosh, he is sneaky, funny as shit. And like, and then you hear Cooper and you're like, that guy's just funny. Like, and you can tell that he was, they said he was like, the best one, bro. He was the best one.

And he had. some sort of condition that disables and some point. I think it was a spinal condition or something. Gosh, man. Something dangerous. Something not good. I love the mannings, though.

Now that they're, now that they're, yeah, now that the, you know, Eli and Payton aren't on the field anymore. It's like, okay,

now you guys are all just like guys on the internet and who's the funniest. And Cooper that's exactly right. I seem to like taking the crowd, you know? Like the most normal, you know?

Right. Most relatable. Eli is the giant killer, right? Peyton was the sheriff. And I've had coaches that were with Peyton before. We had Adam Gase in Chicago, the offensive coordinator after he was in Denver when scuba. Remember the scuba suit, Peyton?

Sorry, 18. He only referred to him as 18. It was like a whipped dog. Showed up on a building. And he was like, 18 only did it this way. You know, I'm like, that's Mike Glennon, bro. Like, we can be open to stuff, you know. Oh, shit.

Hey, man. I want to, real quick, I want to get some, like, actual NFL predictions and ideas here for you. Because, you know, I know you're all prepped because you're going to be on the big show at noon coming up on week one and beyond, which is really, really awesome. But I want to get into a little bit of it here. It's got to get your thoughts, previews of it, everything like that. What is, this isn't so much about this season. But me and Ben talk about this kind of thing a lot, the best week of the NFL season. vibes feel could be around the holiday whatever it is what in your mind is like oh that sunday of football

is the sunday in my opinion there's nothing like being the only show in town and when you get the opportunity to play on a monday night with the eyes of the football universe upon you or you get to play in one of these primetime slots i'm not talking to sunday night football okay because there's a lot of people that are sleeping during Sunday night football because they've been up watching the CBS games, okay? 4 30. But I'll say this, that Monday night game is special. And if there's a girl you still think about, you're like, I bet she's watching. And I bet she's watching.

And if there's a teacher that didn't like you, they're going to see you make a great block. Or if there's a coach that didn't want to put you in the fourth quarter because he said you're a fucking liability. well, fucking smell this first in 10 run play that goes for 38 yards off my big, fat, white ass. That's what you sign up to play the game for. I'll say this, Thanksgiving's really special, too, because in the absence of family on Thanksgiving to be with your football family is really special. And the NFL does a great job of sending guys home on that day after their work's done. And they can usually get in a version of crazy on Thanksgiving.

I'm like, these guys are playing right now. I'm a guy. I grew up doing Christmas on the 26th and Thanksgiving on Wednesday. Yeah. Oh, my God. Yeah. So my calendar's all fucked up. But if there is something special, it's Monday night at 8 o'clock as a football player,

especially when you know you've got some juice if you're not hurting. If you're no better way to let your freak flag fly. and on a Monday night in front of the eyes of the football universe. Primetime, baby. Yeah. This is also something kind of in the same light, but me and Ben, have done some clips on this.

Your ideal NFL slate, all right? So what I'm thinking on this is you think about the 1 o'clock kick, the 425, the Sunday night, off the dome, if you can, the games in your mind that when you think, okay, when I think of the 1 o'clock kickoff on week six in October. Bears Packers, one o'clock. I don't even know.

I don't even know. I mean, Mike Kna Parson should be back. Caleb Williams is 15 pounds lighter, so that cat and mouse game is going to be even more fun. I look at a guy like Luther Burden making the ascension from a P3, P2, maybe a P1 guy this year. P1, P1. Him in Roma, Dunez.

Going to be holding hands at P1, like Colston Loveland may be even higher P1 than those guys, which is scary. Jordan Love probably has a sour taste in his mouth about the way things went last year and how people have crowned Caleb Williams or rightfully so. Matt LaFleur, a fantastic coach who has to feel something from that team in Chicago and Ben Johnson. Like that hierarchy of intelligence in the NFC North is very high.

I mean, Kevin O'Connell, great coach. Matt LaFleurr, great coach. Dan Campbell, one of the best coaches, Ben Johnson. And then you go quarterbacks. So that first kickoff, I want to see Bears backers. Okay. And then, 425. 425.

Okay, we're going to go. either or Chiefs Broncos or Chiefs Chargers. I always love watching Derwin James play football against the Kansas City Chiefs. Okay. And there are a number of players I could name when getting excited about that game. But holy shit, Derwin James, Travis Kelsey, we get it again. That's, you know, that's, ooh, I mean, those guys have so much respect for each other and they try to kill each other every time they play.

Patrick Mahomes is coming back from an ACL. Okay, the greatest player, the greatest villain, the most hated guy by something. He's coming back and he looks great. And you know what? I can't wait to watch that. And then we're going to go, evening. We got the evening game.

I want to see, I want to see Sam Darnold taking on Matt Stafford. Okay. I want to see Matt Stafford. I want to see, okay, wait for it. I want to see how. how the Rams are going to find out how to pay Aaron Donald. Is that for sure thing? Because that has to happen, okay?

That has to happen, all right? I just, you know, it's like I saw Jay Z and Nas. They did a show together a couple weeks ago, but never would have thought that was going to happen, right? But the world's better for it. Aaron Donald, Miles Garrett, it would be like uniting two great houses of Game of Thrones. and that would truly break the wheel, in my opinion.

Has to happen. And going back to your pick at 425, probably going to be a CBS matchup there. Probably. Chiefs Chargers, Chiefs, Broncos. That's, hello friends. That's happening. We'll figure out who it's going to be,

but I know that we'll probably have it, and we're lucky to cover it. And so those games, obviously, for the night game, it's pick your play. I mean, is it, do we get to see what Lamar Jackson and Declan Doyle's offense looks like this year? Okay. Because that guy, Doyle, he was in Chicago with that guy, Ben Johnson.

And Lamar Jackson, some of the quotes that have come out of Lamar Jackson's mouth this offseason are pretty scary. If you're an AFC North defensive coordinator and you're reading some of the shit coming out of Lamar's mouth, you're like, what the fuck are they doing over there in Baltimore? Yeah, I'm a Steelers fan die hard. So, you know, don't love to talk about that. But I do get it. I want to go. So we've taken up enough of your time here on a Sunday night.

So let me get you a few just like you can, you don't, you know what I mean? I just want to hit him, pepper them with you. We can do rapid fire real quick. Injury, the only way the Rams don't go to the Super Bowl. Yes or no? Yes. Bears flashing the banner here to stay. Here to stay.

It's going to be a grease fire soon. Is this the finally the year of the Bills or the Bengals? No. No. Okay, what's going to be a disappointing team? A disappointing team. If you're a Bengals fan, the Bengals. Love to hear that.

Surprise team out of the NFL. Surprise team out of the NFL. Like toughest out or most surprising record? Just think the commanders two years ago. Yeah, fuck. I just think that the AFC West is going to be a juggernaut. and you can't pick a wrong team. And if I were to get laughed at, if I said the Raiders,

I'd say just be patient. Ashton Genti behind a real offensive line is going to be something. I called the Week 18 game between the Chiefs and the Raiders, which was Chris Oludoken versus Kenny Pickett. And it's going to look a lot. It's going to look a lot different for the Raiders this year. And I understand that they are in the deep end, as it were, in that division. But I think the Raiders get a lot more competitive this year.

And as somebody who's got silver and black in my blood, I have an appreciation for that. All right. Last two. MVP. Caleb Williams. Whoa. Super Bowl matchup and the winner. The Super Bowl matchup and the winner. You're going to have to tune into the NFL and CBS for that one.

Oh. Oh, there's a little plug here. Hold up, hold up one more thing. One more thing. What you got? It's your favorite Pop-Tart. We'll get out of here. It would have to be the one with the white icing

with the rainbow sprinkles on top. Whatever that is. Strawberry. That's it. O.G. That's O.G. All right. Hey, I'm mad.

Not mad. You toasting it or is it just staying cold? I'm too hungry for that shit. Room 10. That's a dog right there. That's a lineman, baby. Hey, you guys are the best. Thanks for having me.

Kyle. Yeah, dude. Thanks so much for taking you. all this time on a Sunday. Appreciate it, buddy. Love you, big dog. Thank you. Talk soon. Later, man. All right. K.L. Kyle, the general.

Third guest, third week in a row. We're really firing on all cylinders here. They just keep getting longer. They keep getting better. And that's what she said. They went. Hey, you could say they went long. Finally got a, finally got a trench dog.

in here. A pissed dog. Hey, hey, hey, first two weeks of guests. We got the pretty boys, all right? No, no, no. We're putting the hand

in the dirt this week for you guys. New little meat and potatoes on the show. That's right. It's right. Kyle Long, everybody. KL.

Kall, Kahl. Every guest we have, just their initials. BQ, BQ, KL, K. Dude, yeah. Team these guys at gmail.

com. Keep filling it up. Appreciate you. Let's go to Joseph. Joseph says Jake Kavalski and H.A. Pete, know about this? Oh my God. Staples in my life, bro. He says, hey, fellas, long time, first time. Could not be further from a local podcast, but I nearly spit out my coffee going back and listening to old episodes hearing these two fine Southside gentlemen get name dropped. I'm from the north side and have odd connections to both. Imagine a road trip with those too. We're going to keep dropping them, you know, we have to. I heard a more famous name dropped in a recent episode. It made me think back to a cherished memory that had started to fade with Sance time. It's 2008.

Our high school participated in a statewide entrepreneurship program in which you pitch business ideas to investors. Basically a shittier version of Shark Tank. I think I remember this. You remember this, Ben? Kind of. I remember, yeah. Me and my crew signed so we could cut out of school and stay at a hotel downtown for two days every year for the event.

The event happened to overlap with the NFL draft combine that year. Me and my friends are effing around Washington Sports Center in our hotel room at night after bed checks with the teachers, we hear a knock from the adjoining room, thinking this is one of our friends. We opened the door to find a friendly drunk guy standing there with other people hanging behind him in his room. Naturally, we chat further and he invites us to hang out.

We then see a random massive humans sitting in one of the hotel desk chairs. The drunk guy starts to quiz us on the identity of this dude in the chair. We start randomly throwing out names like Tequio Spikes and Cadillac Williams. The drunk guy then screams, That's T.J. Duckett, baby. We proceed to hang out for a few hours, grilling T.J. on NFL stuff. Delightful guy. We then cruised out through their door, avoiding the tape administered to our door by our teacher,

and walk around downtown Indy for the night. To this day, I have no idea who the drunk guy was and what is connection to T.J. or why a retired T.J. Duckett was in town for the combine, but I became a massive fan and my friends have dropped its Duckett, baby, 8 million times since. Did you guys have any random athlete encounters growing up? I'm on goal ahead and go take your response offline. Joe. Go ahead, goalhead, goal. Go ahead, goal. Oh, the train wrecked my car. I'm on goalhead and goal. Wow. T.J. Duckett, huh? Yeah. That's the thing about the combine, man. I mean, I've talked about it on this show a little bit.

You guys have seen my stuff online, but the Combine Indy, you just, you really never know. Like, you'll be bopping around. You'll be out a bar. You'll be out at a restaurant. And you turn and, you know, Joey Porter is walking in. And you're just like, what the hell is going on? I cannot miss that. That neck, dude.

Think his neck in the history of necks. Hey, yeah. Mel's best available necks. A lot of neck talk. I got to write it down. That's, hey, that's next. Oh, God. Right.

This guy. Random athlete encounters like that. I mean, God. I don't know how random you can say it is for me, but like, yeah, when I'm at Cam Hayward's draft party in Pittsburgh, you know,

I'm just sitting there with Michael Pittman Jr. And Marquis Pouncey, you're like, the fuck is going on? That's wild. Not random, though. Really not. I guess you got to be like in the same proximity.

I've never just seen like, oh, shocky at germy shocky at target like that never happens you know you got to be like at an event kind of i was at i you one time saw uh victor oladipa at stake and shake i mean but obviously hit on my girlfriend it's okay yep she started following him on instagram that night she lost all feelings for me immediately i still think about it to this day i think about it when i'm working out when I'm on

rep number seven I think about it All right Hey guys I just got to miss her miss her I think I've told this

story before with me my dad were in the line for the rental car in Miami in Miami right in front of us

dude relatable somehow right in front of us Ron Jaworski oh in the in the hurts line Hertz line dude Joe's bro I'm 16 it's the first time that I've ever flown

my dad's doing business in Miami and for the weekend he was like yeah like Southwest points he got hey had another flight that he could get with he's like come on I was like all right yeah sick it's January so here I'm thinking I'm going to go to Miami and be in you know beautiful South Beach while it's you know fucking hawth up here in Indy and I get down there it's the Cole just recorded weekend in history of Miami. It was literally 36 degrees, but still dope. And anyway, so we get down there.

And, uh, yeah, Ron Jaworski. He's wearing blue jeans and like a Indiana Jones leather type jacket. And me and my dad like, yeah, it's Shaw's. It's Jaws. I think that's Josh. Yeah. Can you imagine? Is your mom around?

No, it's just being my dad. Roll in her eyes, bro. There's just a boys trip. That's so funny. Is that Joz? Oh my God, dude. I faint. What if you fainted?

Hey, by the way. Why do you faint, saw Jaws? Not the movie. Not the movie? That, hey, that sums up Clubhouse. That sums up this show. Saw Jaws, not the movie. Passed out and passed out.

Yeah. But, yeah. That was best nicknames. Jaws doesn't get talked about enough. That's pretty good. Unbelievable. But yeah, I never forget. And he must have like felt us talking about him or just had a sense. And he turns around after he gets his shit and he's walking away, roll with his roller suitcase. And he just gives us a what's up guys and his Joll's voice. He knew, bro. He knew. You know, when you like have that kind of like. Yeah. Like they, hey, he turns around. His coffee cup says edge NFL Sunday matchup on it. Both you and your dad faint. two hours later on the ground at a Hertz rental car

in a puddle of pee. News is like trying to report on it, you know, like news voices, you know, when talking to Molanaro after he came to, he said, we asked, why did you pass out? I simply said, because I saw the Edge NFL matchup cup.

Oh, wow, yeah. Well, thanks for keeping us updated, Vicki. Glad they're okay. Right, right, right. We'll be back on Channel 8. Wish TV 8. Yeah, so that one sticks out. Dude, randomly, I feel like I've,

not a local pod. I feel like I've had the same flight as, I feel like I've had the same flight as Eddie Gill like six times. Who? Eddie Gill. Who's that? The Pacer, former Pacer, the guy who's the, dude, he's on Fox Sports,

or he's on whatever the Pacers play their TV games on now. I think he just radio with him. Ballet Sports. Yeah. So many flights with that guy. Hey, a lot of flights of different people, yeah.

Flight with Rich Eisen? Yeah, just took a video of them, sent it to you, didn't say shit to him. I was like, good. Flight with Reggie Wayne.

Whoa. Did you have two phones? I had the biggest sunglasses on ever. headphones so like did not like wanted to be noticed but like didn't want to be talked to at all. Nice. Good play. Cool. Fieldy eight's on a flight.

Said what's up to him. Proud of that. That's cool. It's a good one. Work the combine. I mean that's not that's not like a oh my god I saw this guy they were all there. But like we got paired up with guys and we had to like take them. We had to like escort them

to like different parts of the facility because they didn't know they're going and we just you know it was like who's a line ah shit Anthony Barr maybe is that

oh yeah linebacker from UCLA yeah yeah yeah it was like you know it was like yeah who's that again hey next guest hey hot enough but um

yeah I was like okay I'm gonna get these like mid like you know I mean not mid obviously but like I'm not gonna get like that Matthew Stafford or something. We're not allowed to get those like top five guys in the draft probably because we're just like college kids

like working this event. They're like, Politsi, get over here. Can you take Jadavian Clowny to the training facility? I was like, yo.

I didn't know what to do. Dude, I was so unprofessional. Automatically dapped them up. Like I didn't like, I was like, oh yeah, I'm supposed to be like working.

Dude, got my phone out, started taking a Snapchat video like low key so you wouldn't see. he was like, he saw, and he goes, bro, let's just take a pick.

I was like, yeah. He caught me. So sick. Man, like I ran like a four, two. I was like,

okay. Best get off ever. Made it 10 yards in like point two seconds. I was asking him shit too. I was like, what are you running the 40 in, bro? How many bench reps are you doing?

He's like, I'm not allowed to say any of this. I was like, I was like, yeah. Combine, another combine. I was at dinner with somebody, a business associate is me, my wife, and somebody that we're out,

like having kind of a networking dinner with. And my wife. And me, PD. Yeah. Yeah. And we're sitting there and all of a sudden Cliff Kingsbury walks up. Well, not your wife anymore.

Not my wife. Yeah, I'm finding a new wife. Cliff Kingsbury was like one of the, he's a client of the guy that I was having dinner with. And Cliff Kingsbury walks up and he introduced and everything and do a little small talk. Most Cliff Kingsbury ever had like a long, a super tight black quarter zip that just like looked shredded on his body, black jogger. like Nike Air Maxes. Just so like Arizona Cardinals logo like right here. Fresh cut.

So, so put, yeah, fresh is cut. So put together. Literally, you're so right. Literally right after he walks away.

My wife was just like, he's handsome. I'm like, okay. All right. KK stole my girl. Okay. Dude,

hey, nobody wears more long sleeve shirts than KK. He's the reason that I want to wear shorts and longsleeve shirts. I'm like, dude, if I could. Okay. Are we all just cosplaying KK on Saturdays?

If I could have a full closet of nothing but Nike, dry fit, black, long sleeves, and joggers, that's all I would wear. And that would keep me inspired to stay fit and do push-ups and eat light and eat clean so I could somewhat resemble KK. We're always just trying to be Cliff Kingsbury around here. Dry-fit, Nike long-sleeve shirt, Nike sign on one. Peck, the other peck, it's always like his school he's coaching for his alternate logo. I'm like, every time

every time he's got like the old Texas tech guy on there. I'm like, how'd you get that? Yeah. Byser, clean. Not even. No. Just freshest haircut. Oh, he's just going there out. One of those coaches that doesn't wear a hat or a visor.

You're like, damn, you really want to do it. Sunglasses at all times. Cool sunglasses. not like coach athletic sunglasses. Like the ones on the front page of oakley.com. KK.K. has them. Has them on. In a grocery store.

KK., big basket guy in the grocery store. What's up? Oh, yeah. Fresh produce. Stuff you've never even thought about buying. Like he has cherries? Got to get cherries. KK.

KK's buying cherries out of season. so am I. KK's buying sourdough bread. Guess it's my favorite bread now. Yeah. I'll just trying to be like him. Hey, I want to wear that outfit. I'll just want to be an offensive coordinator.

Just dialing up plays. Yeah, nobody's ever really said it. But deep down, we all just want to be Cliff Kingsbury. I wouldn't be mad about it. Just out of the gun. Let's go to Tanner. Ty Lawson. and NBA 2K 14.

Best player of all time? Problem. What up, boys? The Joe King Moped story brought back a similar memory from high school days. My good friend's dad was part owner of a golf course, so he asked him if we could ride one of the golf carts to school in the final level of receiver year. He let us take the golf cart and the ride to school

is something I'll never forget. To get up to our school, all the cars had to go up a huge one-lane hill. parents are just trying to drop their kids off and go to work. Meanwhile, two idiots are holding up the line because we have to keep turning the parking break on and off to avoid rolling back into another. We also parked the golf cart and the teacher's parking lot. A lot of them were absolutely pissed about it. This photo was taken at the end of the day, but in the morning, the parking lot was packed.

Moral of the story is, there's a little Joe King and all of us. To make the day even better as we were leaving school to bring the golf cart back, two cars got into an accident in the parking lot. There was a huge traffic buildup, but we were able to, able to drive around it because he had a golf guard that day. Anyway, smack my ass with my half-finished AP physics final. I handed in the same day and my teacher said, quote, are you even going to try to finish this?

To which I responded, my ass. We won't be back. I won't be back. See, you got me doing a physics test. Dude. They do, they do a picture of it. He sent a picture of it. Pretty funny.

Pretty funny, Viz. Viz. Can we get a Vizh? What's his first name again? Tanner. Man, the amount of people that I've gotten this last week since we've been doing guests that have been like, seriously, like, people aren't saying, hey, get Peyton-Halliburton, hey, get Pekar Armstrong. They're saying, hey, need to have Dan Dockett's or Joe King on. Hey, same guy. That's what people want. I mean, shit, you know, got to. Gotta please the base.

This is crazy if you can even picture this clubhouse, but I saw Joe King and Dan Dockett yelling at each other from like two feet away. I was like this. It's a crazy moment that will never happen ever again, bro. Both are decked out and I use stuff. So pissed. It was amazing. Same height somehow.

I was like, yeah, tallest guys. Tallest, biggest, loudest guys of all times. Oh my God. You ever just had a loud friend? I'm like, how's that happening? I know. Joking could yell across the Rose Bowl

and the whole crowd would hear it. I was like, loudest friend, always the one that's getting you in trouble. Loudest and tallest? I'm like, bro, you're a problem. You're just a walking in-school suspension, dude. Yeah, I could always do some like crazy sound.

Like, it wouldn't even be, it wouldn't even be saying word. Yeah, I'm just like, eh, dude. So loud. And me and you are always the guys that are like, do it, do it right now, do it right now.

Hey, do it during the national anthem. Like, I'm always like setting stuff up behind the scenes. Yeah, dude, I was all, like, yo, fall out of your chair right after the prayer. Dude, the national anthem. Yeah. Yeah.

Hey, right, when it like goes quiet, do the noise. The best dude. This, this, this for the newcomers in the clubhouse, the day once, who have been here through all the Joking. This is, this is the joke. This is it right here, okay? Joking the dude that went, you're at a New Year's Eve party

and everybody's watching the New York time, the ball drop, the ball is dropping it, everybody's counting down. Joe King's the dude who turns the TV off when it's about to finally cold coldest move i've ever seen in my whole life bro oh did not see it coming for a second dude three two people getting ready to kiss bro yeah hey watch this dude clean off first take power out dude what so funny dying laughing not a girl in sight dude so selfie in the corner.

You literally such a fucking dick. Exactly so many. Dude, we did not care. Crazy move. Cold-blooded move. Tanner, I'm glad that you got the channel a little inner JK there

and you get the memory that serves your fair life day. Turn it off the TV at the right time. You can really like put a period on a sentence. I can remember, remember my dad doing that one time he kept asking me to like do something take out the trap hey b needs you to take out the trash need to take out of the trash there's like a game

winning shot on tv my dad right before it went in turn the TV off I was like he goes take out the trash I was like oh my god oh these dad's serious yeah what a move turn off the TV serious big dad move hey something howie long would do yeah put the point across when it's over Let's go to Zach. Where'd he go? Fellows, quick game of every guy's favorite game for you. Where do they go to school? Mainstream and somewhat recent names,

but not obvious where they went because people don't associate them with their college days. Ooh. Before I get to the names, he says, it might be too easy, but I tend to trip my friends up with these from time to time. Smack my ass with Alan Iverson's headband as he crosses me over and breaks my ankles. Zach. Mm-hmm.

All right. Here we go. Tyler Lockett. Kansas State? Nailed it. Julian Edelman. I use Ken State, yeah? Nailed it.

Darren Waller. Oh, my God. That's crazy. Dude, I think, I don't know. I don't know this one. Wait. Is he secretly Big Ten or something? Oh, this is, this is a weird one.

all right what is it Georgia Tech never would I guess that that's a good one that's a good one I'm gonna bring that to the streets yeah Darren Wall oh man dude it's becoming a thing out there on the streets when I play this game

where like 45 guys will just post up and I'll just go and I'm like dude I can't sometimes it's hard for me to get like 45 people to a show in Connecticut and I can just like come out of any and like get 45 dudes to pull up. I'm like, I'm about to start selling tickets and doing this on stage,

like literally for an hour. It's not a bad idea. It was crazy. And like, but a gang of dudes will know all those and it's crazy. That's a good little wild card to throw them off. Terrell Suggs. Arizona State.

Brandon Marshall. Sizzle. UCF. Brandon Marshall. How did he slip through the car? accent go to UCF. He says extra credit John Coon, which Dang, yo,

John Coon, is that like, hold up, hold up, hold up, hold up. You're never going to get this. No, no, it's like a red and blue school and it's like FCS. You're on the right track. Star than S? Yeah.

God, is it like short, short, short hit? No, no. Yeah, I mean, you're off to the right start. You're off to the right start, but you got to ship your way. Shippensburg. Shippensburg. Good call, good hint.

You've been, even, you're knowing balls really been, you've been putting in the work. You've been, you've been doing study. Dude, weird origin story of how I know that is I had to make like a baseball hat logo for Shippensburg University. when I worked for Lids Corporate. Wow. And I was like, oh, that's kind of like, I like learned about a bunch of like schools. And I was like, okay, who went there?

And John Coon was like their first guy. And I was like, all right. All right. John Coon, such a Packer. God, he couldn't play on any other team. Not a chance. Born to be a Green Bay Packer. The whole crowd, bro.

When you're that guy on the team where the crowd, like, Isaac Brews for the ring. Rams? For Heathman. How about Heath Miller such a mainstay with that cheer that after he retired,

anytime a tight end caught the ball, people still just yelled. Not even him. Not even him, bro. That kind of sucks, but they do it for mooth, right? Now they do mooth, yeah.

But you'll still kind of hear some like smattering of Heath a little bit. Like it's still there. It's good to hear, I bet. As a Steelers, fan, you're like, we still got it. That's, hey, that's a, that's a, that's a legacy right there.

Yeah. That's nuts. Dude, Heath Miller on Madden, save my ass on third down, bro. Ooh! Hey, who's the other Steelers tight end? Is it like Washington or something? Darn out Washington, yeah. He might be like my favorite player.

God, what a problem. He is a problem. He's insane to watch, and it's so not a sports podcast, not a Steelers podcast. but it's so... Yeah, give us some X and O talk here, dude. It's just so refreshing to see his skill set be utilized with Rogers, and I know that McCarthy's going to do the same thing. Like, he's just, hey, man, it's all about matchups,

put your jaws cap on. Like, he's a matchup problem for everybody, dude. Nobody can fucking line up with him. Nobody. And not a sports podcast, not a numbers podcast, not a salary podcast. Didn't this dealers just sign him? Yeah, just extended him.

What is it? I think he's like four-year, 42-mill. You're like 12 years, no big deal. Going back to that. What can go wrong? Lifetime contract, yeah. See, I didn't know if he was like a guy that like you could count on or not. Then the Steelers signed him for four years.

I was like, kind of want to get his jersey. Well, when he first was there, he wasn't really. You know, we just didn't know how to utilize him, you know. And then you get, Arthur Smith's offense was very tight-in-laden. And then Aaron Rogers is like, yeah, I'm going to think. throw it to this dude. And so they just finally like tapped into it, which has been great. Sexy draft pick.

That's one. That's when the Steelers pick, Tim, you're like, oh, that's a cold draft pick. Uh-huh. Totally. Let's wrap up here with Christopher. Fake Jordans equals lifetime ban. Ooh. All right.

This is a, I got to get a drink of water here. This is a long one. Hold on. Since we're taking a little break. My phone screen still. Just saying. Lasting impact. BQ, BQ, BQ, BQ, BQ.

These guys, love the first guest feature of the pod. Just stayed in the obvious, but Joey is an A-plus interviewer. It deserves his own serious X-M show. Oh, wow, that's very nice. Thanks. I've got to be honest, interview was a bit triggering for me

once you got off the topic of fake Jordans. Here's my horror story. Back in 2002-ish, when Nike first started retro releasing all of their old classics, I finally got my chance to pay out of my favorite Jordans. the 11s since my mom would never go for it back in 94. Shortly thereafter, I too stumbled across a Chinese website that sold all kinds of custom

color combinations of any Jordan model you can think of, including my beloved 11s and at wholesale prices. Unable to resist the urge to flex on everyone who wouldn't have had any of these dripped color combos, I immediately purchased three pairs. Upon arrival, I quickly realized that the size 12 I ordered were not size 12, and these clearly were not official Jordan, since it felt like my foot was. getting amputated as I attempted to put them on. Short on resale options, since the Chinese website, of course, had no returns.

I turned to eBay as my way to save the face with the whole mess. I listed all three pairs for sale at an approximated size. And within 10 minutes was able to resell one of them. About 20 minutes later, I got the message from eBay informing me the Nike contacted them directly, accusing me of illegally pirating fake goods, costing me the opportunity to wash my hands of the last two pairs, as well as letting me know I would not be allowed to sell anything for an indefinite period of time. Didn't think much of it since selling shit on eBay was not something I did on the regular,

so I figured I'd just lay low for a bit, let it blow over, and then it would all be forgotten. Fast forward 20 years later, I'm dealing with the same car trouble in 2022 that led me to purchasing a part that ended up not being what I needed since the site I got the part from also didn't accept returns. I once again resorted to eBay for a quick solution, only to immediately get the stop sign from their website administrator reminding me what I attempted to do two decades ago. turns out it definitely equals forever. Humiliating, but absolutely had to share once you guys started talking about it on the pod.

All my friends still laughing me or remind me to this day. Anyway, while I may be a criminal in the e-commerce world, no one's prevented me from purchasing ticks to see my heroes perform live for a second time. Thanks for taking the show local and stopping by NYC. See you boys in September. Let's go! Yes! Slap my ass with the refurbished brake booster that fits any Lexus GX470 model between 2006 and 2008.

that will now forever reside in a cabinet in my garage. Sincerely, Chris from New Jersey. P.S. possible Mel's best available ideas. Athlete signature moves. Jordan Fadeway, AI crossover, Griffey Jr. Swing, athlete or coach, viral moments. AI practice rant, Jim Mora playoff rant. Sit from my iPhone.

Man. What a dog. Chris from NJ. eBay guy. Can't wait until we see it. Are you the eBay guy? Yeah. I remember Chris, he came to the first, these guys live in Indy, him and his wife.

Wild. And we went out afterwards together, actually. Yeah, Chris, that was a blast. Hope to do it again in NYC here and just a few short weeks. And man, yeah, that's no joke, dude, because like back then I feel like, you know, eBay or just kind of figure it out. Now a lot of people, that's all you do. People can just sell whole shit on eBay, make a shit ton of money with whatever it is. Maybe not a shit ton.

But, like, you know, enough to be like, hey, I can go to my vacation fund or I can go to my date night. fund with stuff from eBay. Kind of a cool job. I've always wanted to be eBay savvy enough to like have a storage unit and just be like buying and selling eBay stuff. Seems like seems ridiculous. But once you have like your system down, I bet it would kind of bang. Like yeah, I'm just an eBay guy for my job.

Now does that mean? Does that so I'm wondering if he's banned indefinitely from eBay altogether? Can he not purchase on eBay? Or can you just not sell on eBay? I just don't think you can sell. But like, I don't know. Like, how do they know if you get a new username that, do they have your IP?

Yeah. Yeah, I should say, of course they're not going to, of course they're not going to prevent you from giving them money. Right, yeah. I got to stop you from doing that. What's your money, right? Yeah, yeah, give it to us, right? Right.

eBay, like an OG website that's still around. Yeah. It's been that was like one of the first cool website too. I respect eBay a lot. Like I like what they got going on. I've never been an eBay hater. Like it's always seemed fair. More than fair. Almost to a degree of you're like, am I getting away with this? Kind of crazy. That's only $20. It really is just like an internet garage sale. You're like, are you sure? Talk about a website that you could just get lost. People talk about, you know, oh, I just. scroll on TikTok forever. It's strange. I can't get out the reels. Dude, want to get on eBay? See ya.

Hours. And being for real. And like, if you can't find it, it's there. You just got to keep digging. Like, what you want is always on eBay.

It's really weird. When guys get on eBay, they just immediately revert back to their 11-year-old self. Because it's just like, everything's on here? Everything. Everything?

Yeah. Like you said, like, for $28. Yeah, a card that you like, I thought you made up in your head. It's on eBay. Those shoes that you like could never buy. Just like homie's talking about. They're on eBay.

That jersey, it's on eBay. That jersey that I thought I saw, but I didn't. And that one guy had it on picture day. Boom, it's on eBay. I'm like, how does everybody have this stuff? Also, too, with autograph stuff. Like, I've been thinking about, like, added into my old man cave, you know, my collection and shit.

It's like you can look up the things you you could find there that's autographed by your heroes that you're thinking like, oh, that's easy going to be like 280, 350. Dude, you'll find a card or like a terrible towel or something that's signed by Heinz Ward $36. What? COA and everything, certificate of authenticity. Like, okay, well, so that's all I'm going to be getting. And my wife is going to be inundated with packages from eBay. because I get Troy Palomalo, Chris Brian,

Anthony Rizzo, and Heinz Award autographs for a total of like $250. God, you could really like, you could go crazy on there, your wife. Why'd you buy Jerome Bettis's AirPods on eBay?

Just like all that, you know what I mean? It's $3.50. $3.50. Who's not doing that? It is a dangerous place, man. When you get eBay drunk, why'd you buy the Bengals game pants from 2007? I'm like,

eBay drunk, why'd you buy the 1982 Miller Lite cardboard cutout of Howie Long and the fake Raiders gear? Right, because we just had Kyle Long on and it was awesome. So, we want to put it in the basement? Oh, my God. Hey, those companies had to be salivating to get the Raiders deal because they could just have them their uniform pretty much. No branding, yeah. No branding.

Everybody knows that it's silver helmet, black jersey, silver pants. Oh my God. It's really him. Best Jersey contest winner of all time. The black and silver, Howie Long in Chicago.

It's going to be tough to be. But it's going to be happening in New York City. Round three of a jersey off jersey contest for these guys live. We had, the winner in Indiana

was the Spurrier era Washington, Sean Taylor. I mean, damn, man. That would go for so much money on eBay. That's like my eBay, my guy brain thinks about that too. Every time I see something, I'm like,

that would go for a lot on eBay. Chicago winner, Howie Long, black and silver. A lot of good ones, though. Was it that, or did we give it to the custom hunting Oh, dude, I forgot about that. That's like super outlier.

That's like not even, this is going above. I didn't even. It needs its own category, man. That's crazy. And next up, September 1st, Gramercy Theater could be you. Could be a custom joint. Could be something you find off eBay. Get searching.

Make those purchases. Not only eBay, get those Southwest points gone too. Come on out to New York City. Hey, you're in the big city, you're around the big city. Make a shuffle of Tuesday night. You have a nice Italian dinner. Then head on over to these guys live. Bing Pity.

Can't wait to look out in the crowd and see a Kirchin 55. Let's go. Oh, my God. Kirchin 55 and Gammon's 13. Red Sox. Just all sportscasters. A group of dudes with all that on there. Who's the other homie?

Ravich Ravich baseballers Oh my God Ravich Rockies 33 Type kiss all those guys Just I love you so much I love you so much

For that Oh man Yes All right Get your tickets to that Can't wait Coming up September 1st New York City

Me and Benny live Thanks to Kyle Long For being on with us Love having the guests Seems like you guys are really enjoying it as well So let us know In the Discord

DM us on Instagram these guys LOL on Instagram, these guys LOL on YouTube, the Discord Clubhouse, best group chat ever. More and more, I think there's some more and more logos are creeping in there, but everybody's anonymous. So we don't know who it is. Could be Jake Coliseck. I don't know.

We don't know. It could be Mr. Walters. I don't know. It could be. But I hope to see you guys in there. Or in the comments, who should be our next guess? Yeah. We'll shoot our shot.

We've been. doing. We're just, we're just, we're just, we're just, we're just DMs. We don't have a guy. We don't have anybody setting us up. Grassroots, baby. Let us know. And maybe could be helpful too is if everybody's kind of agreeing on some people. Yeah, clubhouse, kind of clubhouse army get out there and yo, you should go on these guys. You just go on these guys, go on these guys, L.O.L. Benny and Joey, like, I don't know. DM them, comment. Just, just get the word out there a little bit, but it's been a lot of fun so far. So, yeah, appreciate you guys.

Love you. And we'll talk to you next week. All right, fan. Yep. These guys. Eric, Eric Gondier. Arna's battle. All right.

Next guest. Hopefully.