THESE GUYS! - St. Elmo's Cocktail Sauce is NOT to Played with

Episode Date: January 3, 2024

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You know, whatever you have to put water in when you have a coffee maker, right? They have like four different ones of those that's just like filled with the one. Yeah. Jesus Christ. TG 66. G66. What's up? What's up?

Clubhouse? Little, little New Year, a little Christmas, little holiday ho break. Yeah, got to have it, dude. got to have it. The week or no one knows what's going on. I really didn't know. I know it's like cliche, but I didn't know what day it was the whole time.

Yeah. Yeah, it was a weird one. Weirdly productive, though. I don't know. How's you like bowl games? Do you have a sleeper favorite or anything? Well, I was going to ask, are you basking in your Michigan win?

I did, dude. I did the most, I did the most, Lovehouse thing ever, and I didn't watch the game. I just listened to it in my car. Whoa. You get the radio call?

Radio call was insane. Man, you missed a view, though. It was fucking gorgeous on TV. It was. It was. It was literal clubhouse porn. Bro, it's just I kind of like never liked

the Rose Bowl game because the lighting or for some reason, you know? There is something about it, but yeah, yesterday I was looking good. And I forgot I live here. So I was like, I was walking outside. I know, I was walking outside. It was like, it feels like the Rose Bowl today. Then I was like, oh, shit, it is.

It was beautiful. Roseball weather. It was awesome. I have a theory that the year goes as the Rose Bowl goes. If it's an all-time gray Rose Bowl, it's going to be. a good year. It's a shitty kind of weird one. Be off.

I feel like they've been weird for the last like 10 years. But to be fair, I did look up what the Rose Bowl was in 2020. Because obviously that was like the shittiest year of shitty years. Is that like Stanford? It was Oregon, Ohio State, I think. Yeah, that was a Rose Bowl. That's a, they've played in so many bowl games recently, I feel like. 2020

Rose Bowl ball up bro no it was Oregon Wisconsin ew but it was 28 to 27 was the final

like it doesn't matter doesn't matter Oregon Wisconsin feels like I'm hung over Wisconsin ruined it I remember

the year Christian McCaffrey first play from scrimmage scored on like an 80-yard screen pass I was was just like deathly hung over at my college house. All the lights were off in the house. It was already dark outside in Indy.

And I was just watching that. And I was like, I could probably go back to sleep because I think Stanford's going to fuck them up. Who would they play? Iowa. Ew. Not a good Rose Bowl. Yeah, but this past one was good.

Colors were good. Prime uniform battle. I'm a little disappointed. I think that half the stadium, like I I think Michigan went with people were wearing blue. Yeah, I know. It's like, guys, come on. For the flyover pick.

Right. Throw some maze on. I know you guys. They had the maze pom-poms. They had the maze pom-poms, but it doesn't show up like that in the photo. So it was like crimson and then kind of navy blue. I was like, ah, damn. We missed a great opportunity.

Yeah. A maze out. Yeah. Yeah. Dude. We haven't even talked about. How about Michigan bringing back those shoulder pad logo? Are you eating me?

It's insane, dude. The way the Rose Bowl logo might be like top logo of all time. Like I want to like if I get a tattoo. That's what we should do that together. Our favorite bowl game logo tattoo. Just the FedEx one on your arm. That's so sick. Hey, I'd throw it back to the Tostitos Fiesta Bowl.

Fuck all this shit. Yep. God, what a party. I can talk about that forever. The Rose Bowl logo though Dude for some reason it like I know this is like so guy for Michigan That's a Michigan fan but it hits different on Michigan stuff

Yeah It does like they had them that you weren't watching But they had the little rose on the visor clip I saw it Oh yeah I was on Twitter during the game Oh yeah On the visor clip and I like it when teams

I can't believe they still are allowed to do this Or they still do it it like it doesn't affect branding but when they like interweave the rose like in the logo you know like Purdue will do that yeah I'm like this is the hottest thing I've ever seen peru did that um you see you had to go on through the horn frog the uh Wisconsin they they would have the inside the w it was like roses like rose icing almost it wasn't just red it was like red roses Oh, it is crazy how they can still do that. It seems like a 90s thing that was kind of like underground.

And now that there's so many regulations, it feels like they can't do it anymore, but they keep doing it. I love it. Classic Bama just having no tie-in. Like you didn't even know they're playing in the Rose Bowl with any of the uniform shit. For some reason that goes hard, though. It makes sense. Like it was just, it was so perfect, dude. Everything about it.

The setting, the venue, the. the announcers, the coaching matchup, the uniforms. Like, it would have been fucked up if Michigan wore white jerseys and Alabama wore crimson jerse. It had to be white on wide, Bama, Navy with the maze. And if Michigan would have gone Navy on Navy, like the day against Ohio State for some reason? No.

So ugly. It's so ugly. I hate it when Michigan does that. It had to be Navy on maze. When Michigan wears all maze, I'm like, it's not. It's not it. Was Joe Poe so pumped? Did he call you? Joe Poe is rocked up, bro.

Joe Poe is probably wearing a Jim Harbaugh Colts jersey with no pants on. Doing this every time they scored. I got to know that text. I got to know because I know he texted you during the game. Oh, shit. Here we go. I hate this.

Because I tweeted about it because I just got one from my dad as it was going into overtime. It just said, fun one tonight. Here we go. I go, Rose Bowl always kind of reminds me of a JV game because like the time and weather. Yeah.

He goes, doesn't feel real. Then like two minutes later, Orum's ready to break one. And he did. He did it all the time. But he was so right. You know when a running back's ready to break one, bro. They're like, it's like a 35-yard gain, a 17-yard gain, a couple of eight-yard gains,

and then down the sideline, just like a 56, like, see ya, later, bro. Defense is real and got them on their heels. They're gassed. It's scary, bro. You ever been on defense when there's like a hot running back? You're like, fuck, dog. At any minute. It's not a good feeling.

Because, like, when they throw deep and you're on defense here, I got. It's like, you know, it's like fluky a little bit. Sure. But when the running back's like ready, bro, you're like, damn, we can't do shit about that. That's when, hey, that's when coach has to use one of the basketball timeouts. You know, basketball, after a team goes on like a 9-0 run, they're like, all right, we just take a timeout to just stop the flow.

Yeah, I got to cool them off. Yeah, dude. Call the timeout just to get him out of his element. burnt one before he fucking goes yard my dad sent me this this and he goes yeah it's like my dad's trying to send me a meme he goes anybody that watched football yesterday

because like he sent me this a couple days ago because the pop tarp bowl you know what I mean yeah yeah I'm like is that you trying to relate to like me it was so weird that's classic though and it was hey that pop tart bowl how many how many fuck how many things did we get sent to us on Twitter Instagram, text. Everybody was like, guys, this is you.

I was like, man. And it did. It absolutely lived up to it. It was phenomenal. They ate it too? Oh, how good was that? How badly did I want to eat that strawberry pop tar? God damn.

I'm still thinking about it. I saw like the aftermath picture. Did you see that? All the icing was off. I was like, oh, I want that. I just wanted to lay on top of it and then eat it. New bed. Hey, honey.

Hey, Auntie. Hey, Auntie, we got a new mattress. It's just a bunch of strawberry filling. Brigh a water bed, bro. Give me the strawberry Pop-Tart filling bed. Now we're talking. Okay, what else? Are there other...

Are there more bowl games? I want more. I think there might be one random one, but we got the national championship on Monday. There's always a couple of random ones like after the fact that I kind of... Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Yeah.

Plus we missed how like the Outback Bowl got switched to the Relia Quest Bowl. How depressing. I can't do that. I don't even want to think about that. Outback bowl's a staple in my life. Exactly. It's always South Carolina.

LSU and Wisconsin played... It's either South Carolina, Tennessee, or LSU every year. And it was... In the Alback Bowl. You can just see Iowa in the Outback Bowl. How many times have those fuckers played? Iowa too. I know and everybody acts like they've never played before when they play.

I'm like, guys, this is fucking every year. And I played those two teams all the time like on the video game too. Yeah. It's just because it was like a good contrast. Right. Yeah. No, I think there's a random one or maybe two that know like the Houston Bowl or something nobody cares about.

but then there's a national championship. I think this may have been the best final four uniform matchup that we've ever had all throughout. You go from Bama, Michigan, you go from Bama to Michigan to the nightcap of the all-white longhorns with the crispy-ass, all-purple Washington.

I was, I meant to text you that because I was like, I'm pretty sure this is the best final four uniform that we ever got. Yeah. It is good Just because Ohio Ohio State's not in there fucking it up

No more No more bowl games Just the Natty on Monday Yeah I just saw that Kind of depressing Kind of depressing that I didn't know The Arizona Bowl was A couple days ago

Wyoming and Toledo That's a hot one bro It's 16 to 15 Wyoming Who's not watching Do you have a good Christmas? Yeah, it was kind of weird, but it was good What do you mean? Nobody was there.

Like, it was just me going to my, like, dad's house. And, like, it was kind of like, when can I leave type vibe. Wait, nobody was at your dad's? No, it was just like my dad's new house. Like, I don't know, like, it was just kind of like, let's get out of here. Didn't hit the same? Nah, it wasn't the same.

sisters weren't there like it was just kind of like we're playing in the we're playing in the February Christmas did you get the Woodson jersey or is that February Christmas that's big time February Christmas nice yeah dude I can't wait

got a couple jerseys lined up I'm just I'm not gonna reveal him no maybe that's not yeah the more I'm getting like so we did this thing where we left a couple presents for like to 26.

Oh, yeah? And it was kind of hype. It was like, it was a good little soft ball into post-Christmas. That sounds good. So you left, like, how many, like, two or three or just like, yes. There was two for Frank because they were, like, big ones that he, there weren't just, like toys that he was going to, you know, see the box and be like, like, ah. They were, they were like, he has, like, this little, like, fortress tent thing and this little,

like table with a chair that he can like, you know, that kind of a deal. But it was nice. It's like, oh, on 26, maybe we should do that from now on. Maybe we should each leave like one gift. So on 26, it's like, wow, today's not totally depressing. This is okay. Yeah, yeah, it's not over. There's a little Christmas hope.

Yeah. So, you know, something to think about. Something, something to ponder a little bit. A little something. Where's that bulls have from? Natown Thrift, bro. had the best day my life Christmas Eve

it was just me and I was just going to whatever store I wanted to and just buying anything I wanted for Christmas And then I was like I got to stop by NapTown Thrift And a lot of stores are closed on Christmas They were open on Christmas Eve Dude everybody's open They close out everything closes hard out at 6 p.m.

Yeah But yeah a couple stores are just They they linger On Christmas Eve I was just, I was having the best day, bro. That's awesome. Nap Town Thrift always gets you with like, you're looking at all the shit in there.

And then if you just look up, you're like, oh my God, wait. There's all the hats are hanging from the ceiling. They're all for sale. I know. I got another one too. I want to grab it real fast, almost. I'm going.

All right, cool. Yeah, I love Naphtown Thrift. Anybody in the indie area who's a listener? I wouldn't say I'm outfitted by there, but I have quite a bit of stuff. stop in there quite often. So, always appreciate the good sheet going there.

Like I got a Steelers starter jacket, a puffy one, and a Pacer's one, and each of them were only like 40 bucks. And they're straight vintage, classic ones. Wow, I just felt like I was back in my old radio area. Oh, nice. Wow, guy who changes hats midway through a podcast. A little NBC Sports. God, damn.

dude. There's nothing better that this might be the best all-time TV logo ever. See this in the corner? Throwback NBC is the sexiest best branding for TV ever. God, man. It's a peacock? I didn't really even know that. Yeah, the peacock is hot. Peacock. Peacock goes off. Yeah, because Fox, you're just kind of stuck with the big old FOX.

CBS is just a giant eyeball. Ew. And the way CBS slaps that on everything is disgusting too. Like the jackets. I saw Romo and maybe it was Nance. They were doing the pregame show and it just said they were wearing like ugly Christmas sweaters and it just said CBS sports across it. I was like guys, can we be like we know what channel it is? Like can we be subtle? So dork, man. CBS definitely. It was so dorky. I was like, these guys don't want to wear this, bro. If you want to be cool, you work for Fox. If you want to be hot, you work for NBC. If you want to be a dork, you work for CBS.

Yeah, that might be the realest thing you've ever said. CBS is to the grave, tell me. So dorky. Like Joe, like, well, Joe Buck, he's always been, always be Foxed us. I know he's ESPN now, but he's just getting. He's so box. He's getting cash, but he is Fox. like Joe Buck, you want to hang out with that

fucking dude, have some beers. Chris Collinsworth, you're like, damn, we're going to cigar bar getting sexy here? Jim Nance, fucking smack me in the head with a wooden two by four. He'll made. Jim Nance? What does he even do like on the off days, bro?

Hey, you know what he does? He golfs. I feel like he plays like, he's one of those guys that plays chess that you're in your old. What? Sure. Oh, yeah. All with just like Casimir quarters have sweaters on. Jim Nance is a nerd.

Here we go again talking shit about an ounce and so we got to stop. Dude, I love, uh, I got to sing this in. Did you see old C.C. and Torrico, they're rocking full on tuxes because they're doing Sunday night football on New Year's Eve. No. Yeah, they had like full on bow tie, like actual tuxes on for the broadcast. I love it. Yeah, dude.

Come on. Yeah. I love a theme. Man, I'm a little whole. for a theme. Like on Christmas, you're doing a Christmas game? Like Rich Eisen,

get that Santa suit on, boy. I love that shit. Let's just keep talking about Joe Buck. Nothing I love more. Have you read his book? Joe Book.

Stupid. Of course I haven't read his book. Yeah, that was a dumb fucking question. I've never read a book in my entire life. I think that's one that you could like,

unless it was for, Round and a future. I was jealous for those fuckers. That was insane. AR points. He used to reading that, dude. I used to speed read it and, like, look at the chapter names and, like, try to pick up on the back of the book and they take the AR quizzes to, like, because I was like, all, I'll be fine. I'll try to do that.

Because you'd get, like, pizza hut coupons. No, it would factor into your grade. And my grades are always so bad. I was like, English is all I got. Like, I can, I can kind of cruise in English and get like an 82. Dude, but then they factor in the AR points. Like, your reading grade goes in there. Bro, my AR quizzes were like two out of 10, fucking three out of 15.

I would do what you did and I would just read the back and be like, I'm Gucci, baby. I know what happened. Maybe catch a few chapters, read the last chapter, you know, like that kind of shit. Spoiler. I'll be all right. Yeah. How hard can it be? be. And then that first question is like,

what did the cake say he got for his birthday? And you're like, it's like three names that you never heard. They're not on the back of the book. You're like, is this the right quiz? Who is Jeremy? A.R. quizzes were the vocab quizzes before vocab quizzes.

Is this the right quiz? Like, wait, wait, wait, wait. Can I go back? Did I click the right book? And the teacher's like, no, once you're in it, you're in it. You're like, fuck, dude. I think I click the wrong book No, you're just an idiot You can't save the teacher

Yeah The reason I think this is because I have no A fucking clue who these three people are I don't even remember seeing their names In my skim of this book Skim, the worst skim ever, dude The laziest skim I would try to copy off the person next to me

Doing the same AR quiz Oh, but the questions would be like scrambled And I'd be like, God damn it Dude, you want to know This is total hard turn here But I just remember it You know, want to know the craziest shit from New Year's What?

It's like 845 on New Year's New Year's Eve Steelers had just won in Seattle Like an hour and a half before You know, so like I was We're still coming down We're all over at my sisters And we're staying in the night there

having a New Year's Eve cousin's sleepover. It's like 8.45. Me and my brother-in-law ordered a crave case of Whitecast. Did you get yelled at by all the girls? My mom was pissed. Yeah. Isn't there crazy how traumatized we are? The first thing I asked about White Castle was did you get yelled at by the girls?

And I'm sure you thought that too. well because I had this little bit going throughout like the entire holiday season every Sunday football Sunday you know when we're like ordering food I'm like we could do White Castle yeah yeah could do White Castle and every time I'm just like no absolutely not have that you pull the trigger on Chris receives year's Eve yeah he's family still he's still he's still alive everyone's sleeping over got four and a half hours until the ball drops just hold the trigger Cravecase

20 chicken rings two sacks large fries I'm not mad at the chicken rings at all those have always looked really good to me they are really good and they don't get shit as bad as the sliders but me and my brother-in-law each probably had like six to seven sliders

and they don't get you they don't get you bro then I mean New Year's day we were waking up like we're in a bad spot It like sits on your breast It's just it was bad It's not good

The idea In the The way it's a suitcase We'll get you though Yeah It was What a move Sometimes you gotta

You gotta do that bro It's a memory It's a core memory Yep Yep yep Bro remember Joey that one year You got a crave case Oh my God dude

That's fire I was going into to the new year with the instant regret. So nothing like it. I also have this theory on New Year's. It's like get all your bad shit out of the way on New Year's Eve and on New Year's Day because then you should be like, only up from here. Clean slate. Only up from here.

I did that. I'm going to give up, uh, dude, I've been going crazy like ordering or getting cookies delivered to my house that I've been gone insane. cookies and meatballs subs what's that bro it's because I like I stopped drinking so now I'm like looking for other things you know how that goes like you ever stop

Oh I didn't know that you stopped drinking Well I mean I'm just like not I don't know why It's not like because of a problem I'm just like I don't really think I need to But so I'm starting to like You know there's this happened my Is it cold turkey or what

I can't even remember the last time I did. I didn't at the show. I don't know, man. It's probably been like four or five weeks or something like that. But I haven't really, I've been just like, whatever.

Man. But the problem is every time I stop doing one thing, I start doing another. So it's like cookie. Like I'm not drinking wine, so it's like cookies. Yeah. Hey, man, everybody's got to have this shit, you know?

Oh, yeah. Every time I walk by a subway, I'm like, fuck, dude. I just would not have been able to make it through the holidays. Like, and it's not because I don't enjoy it. It's one of those where I just like, man, I need a drink because I'm straight. Like, it's not that. It's just like, it's just fun.

That's what we do. And we have drinks. Wine on Christmas. No, no, no, I'm not hating on. I'm not hating on that. I'm not hating at all. But like, because wine and Christmas, bro. Dude, my in-laws, they have this, they got this.

It's essentially like a, it's essentially like a coffee-making. care about for booze. Yeah. Kind. I didn't even remember what it's called, but we show up there on Christmas. And they literally, it comes with like different pods of different ingredients that can go for like a whiskey sour or an amaretto sour or like an old fashioned or martini, all this shit. And then they have four different, you know, whatever you have to put water in when you have a coffee. maker, right? They have like four different ones

of those that's just like filled with a one yeah. Jesus Christ. Coffee eyes. But they have like one of them has vodka in it, one of them has tequila in it, one of them has whiskey in it. And so like then you take whatever pod you want, you know, so I had like a whiskey sour, you put the pod

in the fucking thing, you press down on it, you on top it has options like you can make it regular, you can make it strong, you can make a mock tail. You just do regular. and then all of a sudden just bruise up a fucking cocktail for you. It's crazy. That's an insane Christmas gift that someone got.

I've never even heard of that. I don't even think it was a Christmas gift. I think my mother-in-law just found it on like QBC or Sam's Club or something. And it was just like, yep, this will work. Just a drunk curig. Pretty much, man. It was unbelievable. I was like, I cannot believe that this, they've, I mean, we've advanced this far.

Yeah, forget a bartender, dude. What's my sister's doing that shit now? What? Bartending. Nuh. Yeah. Where? So she was down in Franklin, but she was like making,

she was on New Year's Eve, she was making amaretto sours and, like, lemon drops and shit for me. Oh, man. I was never able to. I was too dumb. Dude, you got to be good to be a bartender. in a row. And you gotta fail, you gotta be able to fail

and have people not realize it. When I fail, bro, everybody knows. Just keep putting more booze in there, you know? That's what I was doing. I was making drinks like a frat boy, like at a house party.

But then the company, the bar gets mad at it because they're like, hey, whoa, like we got to consider about that. That's what costs us the money. But then all the consumers are happy because they're like, wow,

this isn't just a sugary bullshit drink. Make it strong. I'm like, dude, you didn't got to tell me. I'll make sure you're getting an Uber home. Dude, I've started this crazy shit. Like, I've started getting into like cooking. Yeah. No way.

Yeah, that's kind of hot. That's kind of sexy for you. Thank you. It kind of turned me out a little bit when he says that. It's a newfound, newfound hobby, newfound interest, newfound. You're cutting like this? I'm trying, dude. That chef cut.

That chef cut is my kink. Well, you know what sparked it is how else everything else gets sparked in life now. I somehow found my way onto chef TikTok, like creepy TikTok. There are some, yeah, I follow a couple guys that can throw down. It's insane. And so I was like, you know what? I was like, this is fascinating. I want to try to, you know, I'm 30.

I'm about to have, about to be the father of two, right? I'm trying to get more domesticated. So I'm like, I want to try some of this shit. Yeah. So last week, I was like,

me and Robert was sitting there and she was like, what do you want to do for dinner? I was like, what? Would it be crazy if I went and got some stakes and some stuff

and like made dinner? Bro, how happy was she? She was like, I mean, yeah, sure, because I had already secretly like looked up online just, you know, different recipes.

So I was like, okay, I got a seven step process. Process here I can do this Went picked up the shits Came back Wipped up

Two steaks in a skillet Some mashed potatoes Some green beans Boom No way How did it turn out Was she like Yeah

Like they were I'm making pork chops tonight Made chicken cassidias On On Bunt Sunday Saturday

Saturday Made chicken cassidias on Saturday Pork chops That's crazy, man. I'm happy for you. Thanks. Yeah, it's like, it's really fun. Yeah, it's really like rewarding, you know?

Oh, it feels good when you're like, I made this. Because it's a few things because you're like, wow, I'm not spending money. You know, I'm like fast food or outsy or whatever. Two, it's probably better food than whatever in terms of like for you, right? You get like a steak, your support jobs With some of the edge You're not getting five guys or whatever And then three it's like

Yeah, it's an accomplishment You get three things right there That you check off there like wow, I'm feeling good about myself Cool I just made dinner Wait did you, hey did you clean it Do you clean up too? Yeah

Yeah Part of the game Part of the game baby That's how I made Shicky Casadillas the other night Yeah that We skimmed over that Yeah so I was doing the

I was getting them sizzling you know I was getting the cassidias nice and golden brown, take the big knife and chop them in the little triangles. Big knife. Lay them on top of each other. Tortillas kind of like kind of crispy. Oh, crisp as shit, dude, yeah. Yeah.

Dude, you need to make, you need to do breakfast. Oh, that's next, yeah. You make it a couple of breakfast sandwiches, little homemade McGrittles. There was some little hot sauce on there. I always wanted to be able to make like a kind or no. I don't know if this just like, This is that weird

You know I had that bit on it It's like this weird like switch that flips in you When you become a dad That all of a sudden it's like okay I need to make a continental breakfast Oh like two years ago I didn't have that urge now That's all I want to do

Chef Jean It's you got chef Jean I don't know You know used to because used to It would just be like Yeah I could like sizzle some grilled chicken To throw on a salad But that's not really you know whatever

Now I'm like Fuck it I'm making the meats. I'm seasoning them. I'm fucking doing all of it. Bro, that's hot. Dude, imagine when, like, when summer rolls around, you're going to be straight grilled daddy.

Were you grill daddy last summer? Oh, just way, dude. Yeah. A little white claw, a little... Uh-huh. Yeah, dude. That's going to be white claw because I can't drink beer. I'm done drinking beer, man.

Really? Why? You're done drinking? I just can't drink beer anymore. Yeah, I, it just made me too full. I think it's something with the wheat and like the, that, you know, all those hops at the bar, all that shit in it.

Like, I think it, my body now, it reacts to it and not a good way. And now I don't mean like, I get fucked up and do something like, genuinely, my, physically, like, my body doesn't respond to it well. How are guys just putting down beer? I don't know. I was like that. I was like that for a while.

And then all of a sudden, just like, ah, shit, I don't know. I just think it wasn't bothering me like it does now. Because I think about drinking beer and I'm like, well, it's like good.

The first one's killer. You're like, oh, yeah. Yeah. But like, I don't know, you start doing more and more.

And I'm like, now I'm just like burping and burping all the time and shit. And I'm like full and I got to pee. Like, I feel like a, I feel like a baby. Got a piss. A bum.

bunch. Yeah. I'm like, I just don't really, this is crazy. Like, I can't go out in public after that. Yeah. Because I'm just like a mess. Yeah. So I'm either, I'm either, I'm either, I'm either Celtsy boy or wine.

Yeah. Bourbon, I guess. Yeah. Beer, beers off the, beers off the limits for me, man. That's why I don't mind. Like, girls are always like shots. I'm like, I get why you think, why you say that now? Because it's like minimal for a big.

result. I'm still such a bitch with that. I can't do it. I can't do it. I don't have that gene. I have the chef gene. I don't have the throat goat. Yeah, I don't have the throat open gene.

That's the only talent I have is I can eat anything. Yeah, because you're St. Elmo bit. That was insane. Have we talked about that on here? I told you at the show like St. almost cocktail sauce is not to play with. And I was like, I might die. So I tried it. And dude, it just bypassed like all my senses. So I didn't feel anything. Huh. So like it wasn't, you know, when you like, when you first have it, you're like, yeah, this can't be too bad. And then

your face blows up and you're like, what? But it just went so quick through the bong that I was like, I didn't even feel that. It's like if you're moving, if you're moving fast enough, through like flames, you'll come out like, okay. Right. You run your hand through a candle. You'd be all right. But if you hold it there, then you're fucked. Bye.

Yeah, exactly. That's st. Elmo's cocktail sauce. Yeah. Pretty much. Don't hold it there. Don't hold it there. Dude, you should go to Houston for the national championship.

Really? I don't know. I'm there to. So I'm just like, maybe if you get. that I can be like, hey, Rye. Oh, shit, really? Because let's do it. I'm just hyped for that game.

I've been fucking, that's what I've been like trying to pump out good farball shit because I'm like how, you know, maybe somebody, like how I got to go to the fucking LSU. You're a Loki Michigan fan? No, no, no, no. Don't want to make sure don't get that twisted because, you know, every fucking person. Oh, yeah, I forgot about that. But just, I mean, did not.

I would just love to go. It'd be awesome. It's at, yeah, okay. They're playing. Where are they playing? Where are the Texans play? Yeah. What's that stadium closed?

N-R-G. All right. All right. I don't like that stadium. I don't. I don't like the way that looks on TV. I don't like the way it presents. I don't like stadiums that are in the middle of nowhere.

Right? And I think that one is. It is. It's like Miami. The Dolphins is like The Cardinals, Houston's Like when they do the overhead shot

There's just a bunch of parking lot I'm like this looks sad Yeah, I know But I want it smack dab in the middle of the city All I can think about is just like Walking back to the car That's all I when I see that I'm just like God

Someone's walking back to fucking section X 18 miles Away from the stadium How bad does your wife's feet hurt? You know? It's insane. How about your wife's feet hurting so bad you feel it? Right.

That's my mom, dude. At Disney World, we're like, do we really have to get you a motorized scooter? Like, are we doing with this? I'm in, if you're in. If you shut up, let's fucking rent one. Oh my God No but it's closely like it's always You know with the mom

The mom never wants to like make it about her But she does want to make it about her You know Yeah Yeah Yeah Like you can tell she's really in pain You're trying to help

I'll be fine I'll be fine Yeah There's a lot of I'll be okay Yeah But it's like we didn't ask Yeah I'll be good I'll be good

It's like yeah we know but for mom she listens every episode so I know I'll get some backfire on that one but all good what are you going to do what are you going to do yeah I'm jealous though dude you're out there and freaking sunshine splash and I just look to the forecast today in Indy and it's going to be literally like 36 degrees of gray for the foreseeable future or the foreseeable future I love a gray day man Yeah, gray day's fine But gray weeks

That gets the other thing It gets to see a little bit Like we had a gray day here It like rained a little bit I was like yeah I love this Everybody's like ew It's so gross out I was like nah you have no idea

Like this is my shit Right at hall I'm ticked Oh yeah Let's have a depression day Come on Do you How do you break down your year

I asked right of this And it's so different For everybody but I think especially like guys to girls. You know what I mean? Like when you're looking like right now here on January 2nd, you're looking at it. You're like, all right, all right.

I got to do this. And I got to like how do you break down your year? Oh my God, dude. I don't even think about it like that. I don't think. Really? I'm a day by day guy. Yeah.

Take it as I get it. Um, yeah, I haven't had. I don't have a big picture set up yet for this year. Why? Well, how do you do it? Well, no, I'm just saying like every year for pretty much as long as I can remember now.

It's like, all right, January, hey, we got NFL playoffs. You only got NFL playoffs. So that'll get us through. February, you know, Super Bowl and it's the shortest month, right? March, hey, it's like kind of getting warm about. You got March madness? March, break, spring break. Spring break.

March madness, yeah. It's getting fun. It's getting fun. April, you know, opening day kind of, you know, rank it down that. May, oh, summer's here for us, 80500, the Kentucky Derby, sick. June, that's just summer. And then July, hey, it's 4th of July, and then football start again. August football really starts, so we're getting back into routine.

September, holy shit, it's fall, full-on football, October, now the fun really starts. So I'm like, all right, just make it to October. Yeah, it's not bad. Yeah, you got shit. You got shit along the way. But it is all sports stuff. Sports and holidays, dude. That is my benchmarks for everything.

It's like, hey, that'll give me through to this. That'll get me through to that. It really is. There's nothing else to look forward to. How do girls break it down? That's what I'm, yeah, she was like, I've never thought about it that way. She's like, I guess just like holidays and like getting together with the family

and like, I don't know, running a household. I'm like, man, you need, you got to find something. You got to get a team, babe. You got to find something to get you through. How the hell else you're doing this? Holy shit. You're right. You got to find something or else you're done for.

I mean, like sometimes if you got to make it up, like, cool. I might have girl brain when it comes to that. Because, you know, like, I like it to surprise me. You're like, April opening day. Like I'm like, oh, shit, it's opening day. That's nice. It just like pops up on my Twitter. I'm like, oh, shit, we're playing baseball now.

man yeah we're opposite in that I need to like just because sometimes I get down the you know I'll get kind of in the dumps like it kind of been a little run I'm like hey you've got divisional division this weekend like that's gonna be fucking awesome

hey wild card weekend come on babe perk up in the hunt eight games let's go like that's what I need that's how I get through I don't know I'm sure it's different for everybody but yeah holiday holiday is the sporting events I'm like that's that's it that's it really

October is when the fun starts though you're right that's when just give just give me to October we're cruising baby yeah and but it's like it's like it's like it's like a it's like a big picture but a small picture it's like you know I do so every I enjoy every day but I have the big picture to get me through is that makes sense like I'm not just sitting here being like god just give me to October but I'm thinking I'm like yeah I'll go day by day and find the little things I look forward to, but those are the big benchmarks on them like, oh, yes, okay, this is yeah, that'll give me third. Right now is probably the worst

time, if I'm being honest. After the national championship. And in full playoffs. Treasures, shish, shish. The worst time is after the Super Bowl. Yeah, for a minute there. Then people were like, yeah, March Madison. I'm like, yeah, but you got the rest of February still.

or maybe after March Madness could be I get the Masters, everybody loves the Masters and everybody's just like, what do you mean? Are you on? I'm like, it's cool, but like I'm really only watching on Sunday. I'll try to watch something other stuff. You know, everybody's got their own shit.

Everybody's got their own shit. Dude, I miss Christmas, man. Get us back. God damn it. Christmas was so lit. Oh, shit. We got a clubhouse? Let's see, yeah, this hits some clubhouse here.

Team these guys, Gmail.com. Yeah, we just took a little Christmas, a little Christmas break there. So we're back. The house understands. The house understands. This is from Shiona.

Subject is 0.003% of girl listeners. She says, Hey, Jolian, Ben, I've been watching these guys since episode one. And because it's everything football, y'all got me back into watching Sunday football all day while drinking champagne. My voice on Monday sounds like that old person who's been smoking four packs of Sigs a day for 50 years I'm a Broncos fan but a supporter of the following teams

Bears, Rams and Niners, Raiders Is there any teams y'all supporters of? Slide my ass Rip my wig off, drown me in the Pacific Ocean Y'all are killing it and can't wait to see this store for both of y'all That was very nice The way you read like The slap my ass with like no

all business is so funny I'm like do you not know what you just said drowned me in the Pacific Ocean brooks yeah she's got a lot of squads she's rooting for a lot of teams I like that well she said she's a Broncos fan

but she supports the bears because of her cousin the Rams and Niners because of her friends and the Raiders because her best friend is a hard raiders family. So, I am. I mean, yeah, obviously we know that I'm a Steelers fan.

Yes. But yeah, like I support, like I'm pals of Christian McCaffrey and George Kittal. And so I, because of that, I like to see them do well. I'm not like rooting for them. But yeah. Obviously Packers. Obviously.

People hit me up all about that. Lambo lead post that anniversary. Yeah, you sent me that. Clubhouse came out big time for the that. They were hyped. This is the Packers podcast. I like follow the Colts. I don't root for them or support them, if you will,

but like I follow them probably the second most just because all of our friends are like diehard season ticket holders. So like how can I not have a pulse on that? Oh, yeah. Ben just kind of supports whatever team is cool and has cool uniforms. Yeah, and a cool, trendy. player. Like the Ravens with the black tops and the purple pants, how are you not supporting that?

I mean, I know you aren't, but like, damn, dog, that looks good. It looks good. I mean, they're color, like. The gold, the little gold trim? Come on. It's hard to not, yeah, I mean, with good colors like that. Hey, that's another team that could be NFC. And I can see, I think it's the purple for some reason.

Super dark, yeah. The purple is like NFC-ish kind of. Mm-hmm. You know? Mm-hmm. Yeah, you've been mentioning Jalen Hertz a lot. Are you kind of, kind of eagles? You got the eagle shoes from last year.

Jalen Hertz is hot. I'm not really Eagles. I really don't like him, but I just like the way that he, he's really good at, I've never seen anyone wear cleats like that. Yeah, his cleats are crazy. I'm like, oh my God.

Like, he's never, it like gets better and better every week. He just knows what he's doing. Yeah. Congrats. How they match them to the, how they match them to the, like,

yeah. Uniform they're wearing and everything. Mm-hmm. Looks really good. Uh, from Brody. Subject to David Tyree Helmet Ketch. Fellas,

hope you had a jolly good holiday season. I'm a Minnesota Vikings fan, and I always appreciate the Randy Moss talk and other relatable content. I'm wondering what your favorite lintz sanity or five seconds of runs you guys enjoyed the most. Mine would be when Terrell Pryor failed as a QB that randomly put up 1,000 yard receiving season a few years later, only to disappear from the face of the earth and not be heard from again.

Also got a few names for you. Vante Leach, Aaron Ripkowski, Byron Leithwich. Slap my ass with a present tube of Goert. I traded my buddy for at lunch. Still frozen at lunch. That's crazy. You had a good lunchbox. Yeah.

Oh man Botte Leach well I know all about Byron Leifflage brother Come on back up QB for the Steelers forever Oh was he Yeah When I think Steelers backup dude it's all about Charlie Batch Oh yeah I mean he is the backup

But Byron was later on Batch jersey Yeah that that would go hard I don't know about the Linsanity thing I'm trying to think who just went insane Aiden Hillis had a whole year of of low insanity Bro I

I just never got into that because the Browns weren't ever on TV I was like is he going crazy Like I don't know who knows He went crazy got the Madden cover And then like last year he saved some kids from drowning So good for him but other than that He kind of fell off. Tim Tebow?

That's like the biggest mania ever was Timto. Ew, when he beat the Steelers, that pissed me off. That pissed me off. That's kind of why I'm pissed at Tim Tebow, like, forever. I was down bad, obviously from that. But like the whole run was fun. Like, I was all into it where he'd be like four of seven passing for the entire game with like 62 yards,

one of them being a 50-yard touchdown pass to Eric Decker, and somehow that might be a guy that like did kind of have a little insanity. He had a good year. He just had a good career, man. He was their number one receiver. I was like, this guy's amazing. Him and Demarius Thomas? Oh, that was a squad.

That's tough right there, you know? Eric Decker playing a little quarterback at Minnesota a little bit. Eric Decker did? A little bit. A little bit. bit. Number seven. He was like a do-it-all guy. Like, sometimes he'd take snaps and run a little wildcat, throw it. He'd, you know, he just get the ball in Decker's hands. Dude, you know, he was just like athlete of the century, like, in his state, you know?

Oh, yeah. There's like a three, three sport, too. Track, basketball, just fucked around and played baseball, like probably got a couple of like the Reds called him probably You see a Pueig he had a run he had a moment I remember the herd was talking about him all the time

there's a couple cornerbacks too right yeah where they like Josh Norman he's kind of like the Peyton Hillis equivalent of corner like 2015 The best corner ever And then like he ever you know every year after He was just kind of like he's fine But 2015

he was just, you couldn't do anything against him. Shutting down Prime Odell Beckham Jr. Right, yeah. Awesomewa. There's like a couple of those dudes. Namdi. Namdi awesomewa. Dude, when they with the Eagles and died.

Yeah, when there's a cornerback that like pops off for three games, dude, people just throw money at them. Oh, yeah. Then they're never the same. No. Then they just have soft tissue issues for the rest of their career. Can you get on the field? Soft tissue.

You know what else is soft? Jeez. Ew. From his coverage. From Blaze. Subject line, Brian Cushing. Hey, Benny and Jojo, you may have talked about this before, but what's your go-to dressing or sauce that you could literally put on anything?

It would make your meal 38 times better. Personally, I could put Frank's Red Hot on size 13 rebocs. sneaker and it would still be the best thing I've eaten since those little cake cookies with the frosting they sell in the grocery store. Also, if you had to pick one restaurant, fast food sauce to eat with every other meal, what would you choose? Slat my ass with the warmed up tortilla from Chipotle with extra honey, vinegar, and a bag of chips. Oh, bag of chips. All right, go to sauce and make anything 38 times better. You go first. I got now here. It kind of depends what it is, but I can.

can never, you can never go wrong with like honey barbecue sauce for me. Honey barbecue. A little, sweet, but a little, little tang, that's like, that's like my, if I'm picking like a wing sauce, honey barbecue all day. Yeah, I see, he's saying Frank's Red Hot, I'm a big Chalula bitch. Mm-hmm. I love some Chalula. I also love, you know that like, it's, like, it.

It's like Thai chili sauce. It's like kind of candied chili sauce. Mm-hmm. That you can like dip calamari in, but also wings come in and somehow. Oh my God. Very versatile songs. I have my ass. Holy shit.

Get the ball in Thai chili's hands. Please. Versal one else. Versatile. I want to go down winter blues with Thai chili. It is good because when you hear it, you're like, oh. right you know it's going to be a little sexy a little sweet little spicy

yeah you're like I haven't I haven't been down that road in a while the Thai chili road one of my favorite streets hey you just take a left on Thai chili and you keep going until you find your happy ass home oh I'll go I'll be on that road eye chili is a nice switch up I was a little slut for spicy mustard

there for a while still I am putting that on anything, dude. I guess I wouldn't put it on wings. I was, though. I was just going crazy. I've had a renaissance with Chick-fil-A sauce. Oh, yeah, you're in love with Chick-fil-A sauce. Just recently, I may have already talked about it, but like,

I was always a ranch and like a Polynesian guy when you went a Chick-fil-A-Lay. Also, I had Chick-fil-A-A. Also, I had Chick-fil-A a few months ago and I think they may have given me Chick-fil-a sauce by accident and I was like, yeah, maybe I'll just like, let me try it. Again, God already had it. For old times'

sake. Yeah. And I was like, holy shit. I was always just kind of lukewarm on it. And now I can't get enough of it, dude. I only do Chick-fil-A sauce. I don't even need ranch or Polynesian or any it. What is it? What is Chick-fil-A sauce? I think

I said it's like honey mustard and barbecue you mixed together. Oh, hello. Wait, I'm okay. Okay. I know who's getting jakeful later, though. Yeah.

From Travis. Subject line, Jason Gilden. This is another guy that wore a revolution face mask like the day it came out. Biggest shoulder pads of all time. Hey, guys.

Hope you had a great Christmas and happy New Year. I hate New Year's resolutions, but this year, I want to try to read more books. Right now, I'm reading Kirk Hurstreet's autobiography, and I'm really enjoying it. What are you guys depending on New Year's resolutions? Do you have any, or are they over-related? P.S., over Christmas, I helped my parents organize some old cookbooks,

and I found a Brett Favre cookbook. Here's a picture of me. It's on Amazon, drop the ball, pop the champagne, and slap my ass, and he sent the picture, and here it is. Farv Family Cookbook by the Farrv family. there is no dude I need that book

three generations of Cajun and Crean and Korean old cookie from the Gulf Coast wow bro are you kidding me you're starting to be a chef in that dude you need that cookbook that's meant to be I'm going on Amazon right after this Travis again finding that every

every single thing you make for your family is just all from Fav It's green and gold I mean it's just perfect dude I mean that is made for our podcast If we ever get a studio A physical studio That shit's going up in there

The only thing in the back there Picture a Joe Buck in the Farve cookbook And us just Us is talking with Packers jerseys on And maybe helmets too Right with the bar down the middle Packers helmets what I would give

I'm going to be oh hey we get all have dreams we got all have dreams that really is my dream that sucks but it is the studio is like green it's like a green it's not a green screen

it's like that Packer is green like old 70s the wall the Lambo wall the Lambo wall the Lambe's like Herbie's Autobiography is good, though, if you're looking for something. I can't believe he said that.

I was a Christmas gift two years ago. I downed it by New Year's. Yeah, you read that in 64 seconds. Yes. My dad's autobiography? Come on, man. Yeah, I had to. True.

Not reading the back of that one. That one's a 10 out of 10 on accelerator. Hey, that's one of those is where you read the prologue. You know, usually you skip over that shit, you read that. Yeah, I don't need that. Prolog, you're like, I need to set the tone. I need the foreplay. Resolutions, though, where are you on that?

I don't know. I'm never like, oh, I should do that. So, I don't know. I've never really had one. I've never really done one successfully. It always makes for good fodder in conversation when you're, like, at the New Year's gathering with your family or something, you know? Hey, come on, throw it.

like what are you thankful for right like a day skipping kind of gives me a little lint vibe too yeah yeah i mean it's if if that's what you need to you know get yourself going get a little kickstart then by all means but yeah i'm not like one of those every year i'm like i'm going to resolve to yeah no one's doing uh ever um i do like what you what you said though uh like uh resolution start on monday type shit, you know what I mean? So like New Year's Eve and New Year's Day you can kind of go crazy. Yeah.

Like I'm not going to eat any more cookies like I've been doing, but last night Got it in. Went on. Got it in, dude. Yeah. Oh yeah. Last one here from Nick. Subject, short and sweet.

Hey, props to Corona for rolling out the same holiday commercial for what seems like 30 years now. Palm Tree with Christmas lights. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. Slap my ass. Love that. What a guy that is. He knows us.

It's been over 30 years. I actually saw that commercial debuted in 1990. God, every time I see it, I'm like, we're still here, baby. There's still hope. Dude, when they hit you with that on, like, December 29th, bucks you up. Ew, yeah. I'm like, sorry. I feel like I need to, like, apologize to Corona.

I love you. the kill button but then also they're like it's still holiday season like we're still it's like yeah god no no kill button forgot to hit that it's running a little long i like it though i like it i'm like it i'm like if they're doing if they're still doing it we're still doing it that dude or girl who came up with that ad idea that's they they're literally living that life right now just out on an island somewhere enjoying the sunshine because they deserve it they they they came up with the perfect ad

the whistle Oh and how it doesn't come You hear the Of the light Oh yeah And like you can hear the waves

God damn it That's such a good commercial man It really is Is that best commercial ever I think it is Until Until next November maybe They usually always wait though

They don't bring that out Until December November is like the month where the companies are trying to sell money. Corona's like, don't worry, we got it. Right.

The real true good Christmas commercials are the one that come in December when it's just like a peak. We didn't have to do all that shit on November 3rd to get you out to get our deals. This is just a nice little, hey, reminder, we're still the shit. Yeah.

And Merry Christmas. Right. They mean it. Exactly. Sincere. Right. December 17th Let it ride

They'll see it They'll see it Hey they got it to the point Where people are looking it up on YouTube Oh my god They're like Corona commercial Did I didn't see that this year They look it up on YouTube

Then they see it like two minutes later on TV They're yeah there it is There it is Jump the gun a little bit Man that's such a good Yeah I don't think there's any other commercial that does that That's just been around, like that plays for 30 years?

There's no other commercial. Yeah. The M&M one with Santa has been on for a long time. Oh, no way. Yeah. There's probably like a Coca-Cola polar bear one too, you know. Yeah, that's what I didn't see this year. I don't know if they just killed that one or what,

but I didn't see the polar bear little St. Nick one. Ooh, that's kind of sad. That's sad that you thought about it too. Yeah. That's how fucked up we are. Eminem Christmas, Corona. Yeah, it's all the Christmas ones. I wonder if there's a...

You just bring it back every year, man. Hey, we don't got to worry about doing marketing around the holidays, Corona, because we're just running this back and everybody's gonna be just as happy. I do get downloaded the Hershey's one too where they're in the tree and they... Oh, shit, shit, shit.

It's not as iconic, but I do know exactly what you're talking about. Oh, man, I miss Christmas. We got it's a guy We got to stop NFL playoffs We got a NFL playoffs time We're divisional

Round in it We're having BCD Every weekend of our lives For the foreseeable future And it's going to be awesome There we go We're going to be in Houston Next week

And we're not even going to go to the game We're just going to sit at a restaurant And talk about Andre Risen And Andre Risen, dude Charlie Garner It's good It's good

It's good Yeah All right, Clubhouse, Happy New Year. Glad to be back. Subscribe on YouTube. Please send it to five friends. Please. Hey, you guys talk about Charlie Garner and the Lambo Leap.

And send us in the email team these guys at gmail.com. Hey, come to St. Louis January 25th. Yeah. Headlining, William Comedy Club. Get your tics. It'll be in the description of the pod. St. Louis, you guys were awesome. and I had a ton of fun with you guys

when I was there in September so you gotta you're asking where's Johnson and you gotta get out here and fucking do it again come on club ass I'll see you there cool all right

uh talk to you all right Jake Plummer Jake Plummer These guys Fuck you