THESE GUYS! - Still Tippin Press Box

Episode Date: January 14, 2025

on this ep the burpy boys explain how they both should’ve died last week⭐️ 𝗟𝗘𝗔𝗩𝗘 𝗔 𝗥𝗔𝗧𝗜𝗡𝗚 / 𝗥𝗘𝗩𝗜𝗘𝗪 𝗽𝗹𝘀!📺 𝗪𝗔𝗧���𝗛 𝗢𝗡 𝗬𝗢𝗨𝗧𝗨𝗕𝗘 https://youtu.be/xxQ75QbyHHY🧢 𝗡𝗘𝗪 𝗰𝗹𝘂𝗯𝗵𝗼𝘂𝘀𝗲 𝗺𝗲𝗿𝗰𝗵 https://benedictmerch.com/products/clubhouse-hoodie?variant=44118163914809🎟️ 𝗕𝗘𝗡𝗡𝗬'𝗦 𝗨𝗣𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗨𝗣 𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗪𝗦 Chicago - Feb 12 https://chicago.zanies.com/show/benedict-polizzi-special-event/zanies-comedy-club-chicago/chicago-illinois/Rosemont - Feb 13 https://www.etix.com/ticket/p/70209203/benedict-polizzi-special-event-rosemont-zanies-rosemont?partner_id=100

Eight people in the crowd. It's 9 a.m. You're playing St. Maliki in a cold gym. All of a sudden. Holy! There's a teradactyl in the corner of the gym. Not bad for a fat guy. TG. 117.

117. He's standing again. He's standing. I should be standing. I'm sitting down. This light makes me look a little green. I don't know what's going on here. I don't know what's going on.

He's that. Oh, well, low. Longest straw in the world. In the world. Doesn't have a straw. Not interested. Trying to drink it from the straw from his desk without moving it. Oh, my God.

The short straws at Starbucks. I'm like, for what? Oh, I'm the opposite, man. I hate those long-ass straws. I always get a big ass coffee, though. and then I put the straw, the small straw. I've had to deal with it a lot of times and I put it in there and it falls in the coffee

and I'm like, man, but I just need the little bit of the straw rolling up. Just the tiniest bit to where I don't have to drink it. I can just sip out of the straw, but I don't need a really unequal straw to cup ratio. That pisses me off.

Give me a pipe, dude. Give me the biggest stride in town. It literally does. It doesn't even look like you're drinking coffee. It looks like you're smoking from an Irish pipe. DG-117. You want to push tics. I've got a lot of stuff to get into.

We got a lot of get into here today. Hey, Chicago. I'm going to be there, February 12th. Get your tickies. Zanies. Bennyplicey.com. Then the next night, Rosemont. It's like 30, 45 minutes away.

Zanies, Rosemont. I'll be there, February 13th. Grab your text. Bennypolicy.com or right under here. Get your merch. New TG Clubhouse merch, everything available in the Linky, Benedictmerge.com. Linky, linky.

Can't tell if I'm going to Chicago or not, can you? Chicago. Wow. Never look more like a defensive coordinator than right now. Look at that find. Why don't they utilize that a little bit? more, huh? Your horns coming out of the bee? Huh?

Wouldn't he food B? Play, calling plays. Dude, born to be a JV coach. Dude, I found myself and I had, I had O.C. outfit on the other day. Shit, where was I? Might have been Disney, honestly.

But I just came downstairs and I found myself, I had new pair of joggers on. Yeah, baby. A new pair of, new pair of white untouched shoes on. What color were the joggers? Charcoal. Yeah, literally. I knew it.

Nice. What else? Keep going. Keep gold and golden. White Air Force ones that were crispy clean. You know, ankle socks. So you see a little bit of the ankle, a little bit of the ankle. I like that. And then I had a long sleeve dry fit with the sleeves pulled up. And I was like, oh, yeah, if you need me for an offensive coordinator job, I'm ready. What's up?

We're going trips, right? I got the best forearms in the world now. Who's going in motion? Just wanted to, yeah, just wanted to stand there and just talk to ride the entire day with my hand on my hip while I'm looking down like I was looking down at a play call sheet. No, yeah, your defensive coordinator with the arms crossed like that. Oh, see, only the biggest, the, you know, the old, uh, um, uh, Lincoln Square diners house of pancakes menu.

With their hand on their head for some reason. Me calling plays like this. Yeah. And then they're doing us the split screen, the split screen on NBC, right, where they're showing all, you know,

this is just a chess match between Coach Johnson and Coach many. You're the defensive coordinator like that. And then I'm standing there and I'm just yelling out a whole bunch of nonsense, mouth moving a whole bunch, saying a whole bunch of different words of different states. different numbers, different colors.

That's where we are right now. 10 a.m. every Saturday morning, me. Dude, being an offensive coordinator, you would have, I, I couldn't do, I couldn't do offensive coordinator. I couldn't do any coordinator in the booth, man. Get me on the field. Get me down there. I know, but hey, dude, how good does it look up there in the box,

not sports podcast? How good does it look up there when they just have like 78 Diet Coke, Sunflower? seeds. They just got it all laid out, bro. And all they got to do is just, hey, they're in cover two man robber. Like, you know, they're not really, they're not really doing shit, bro. They're just like helping out. Yeah. Hey, the, the booth for the court, the coordinator's booth booth of an NFL team is just your coffee table and your college house. That's all it is. It's 15 bottles of dip.

You're essentially playing Madden. For some reason, there's an N6. 4 controller up there. You're like, wait a minute. What the? Yeah, dude. Somebody, so they have little like little little little spots of weed, you know, just little crumbs of weed. You're like, I guess. There's a bong with Bob Marley on it and on the corner. You're like, oh, shit, we're on Fox right now. Damn. Just a, just a bag of just a bag of Doritos. It's just like community open for business from anybody. Oh yeah, dude. Those have been there for a while. They're stales, still eating them. TV's

on in the corner, but it's on mute. A thousand ways to die. They do always have the TVs on in the coordinator's booth. Yeah, for what? You can't see enough. You can't see enough of the field. You got to have another view. Right. Who's mandating that? The NFL,

CBS themselves, that you have to have our game broadcast on in your booth behind you. You're not going to look at it, but you have to happen. What if it was just the game Brett Favre broke the record? Or Vikings Brett Fav game, the Sydney Rice throw? It's just that on a loop. Or shit, no, no, dude, it's Grand Thefton of San Andreas.

I was about to say, what if it was like IMC, just like a local ass music video station? that only plays that station, music radio station. Station station. It's just like, IMC and it's just still tipping by Mike Jones, Paul Wall.

Chicks shaking their ass. Bro, tell me you're not going to, tell me you're not going to throw up 64 points on the other team. Still tipping on TV. You got an N64 controller, a Bob Marley Bong,

original Doritos. 18 cans of dip. Yes, so much defense in the league. What drink is out there, though? Like, what do you actually sipping on? One of those Arizona iced teas. So big.

Yeah. Arizona ice teas are so, and they're the girliest colors. They're like teal and pink. What's up? Oh, yeah, this was 18 cents at the gas station. That's a funny thing.

Yeah, from any guy from 2014, walk around with that. drink in their hand and it's just every girl's Pinterest board. Same thing. What's a crossover there? Oh my God, your drink is so pretty.

I've never had more confidence when a girl says something I have is pretty. I'm like, well, I didn't think about that for one second, but thank you. Pretty. It's like the same color as like the paint. I painted my room when I was a kid.

I was like, okay. Shut the fuck up and kiss me already. What are you talking about? I'm just spitting sunflower seeds in here. Like, what? Dude. Yeah, that's what I need that.

I need somebody to just turn off the screen because it's always on a delay. You know, so they'll pop up to there, show Joe Brady from Buffalo, you know, and he reacts to a score. And then you see it up there happening in the replay again. Now, dude, I see that. TRL it. Give you something nice on there, dude. So I can play during timeouts and stuff. Is it offense?

I don't know why I'm asking this. You have no idea, I'm sure, but I don't know. Your dad was a coach. Do the offense, offensive guys have one booth and the defensive guys have one booth? Are they, is there an aisle that separates them in one booth? Um, I don't even think. Nah, everybody's up there. Well, I mean, it just depends on what, um, what kind of press box you're working with.

You know what I mean? Because I'd kind of go back to a couple weeks ago when we were talking about, like, watching film, the different film rooms. You know, how the O-Linman, right, it was like a party essentially donuts and shit and they're huge waters and just like ripping ass and having fun. Defense, getting all shitty. Like, I feel like it would be the same thing for the coordinators. Now, if you had the offensive guys on one side, it would just be like a bunch of slick dressed dudes with like Bobby Valentino playing in the background and drinking like a slow. Power drink. I just want to get to know you.

And then you go over to the defensive side. When the pretty round thing look good to me. Go over the defense of side. Worst smelling room of all time. Just like hardcore Led Zeppelin playing in the background. Nothing but that song that's like, whin, dacha-dank-dank-dank-dank.

Just that. Holes punched in the wall. Uh-huh. Guys look like shit. I don't know, bro. You're playing a public school high school, might have two separate rooms. Yeah.

Public school press box. There's a lot of little rooms in there. D3 press box? Not a lot of rooms, dude. Alabama press box? Dude. You're putting up your family, friends, cousins. They got so many rooms in there.

Yeah, it just depends. That was such a weird dynamic in Indiana, and central Indiana, when all of a sudden every stadium you went through, they all just had like, I guess this is tech. Texas now. This is Texas high school football. Like everybody has a press box. Oh, yeah. But still, it was still weird, man, because you'd be in the press box with the offensive coordinator,

defensive coordinator, his son's running around in there. The SID of the school, the principal, their wives. The priest. Yeah. The priest is always in there. Right. Hard to get on anybody's ass when Father John's right next to you. And then you got two slaps in there calling the game too for the for the radio broadcast. I'm like this is so like God so many different smells in there man. Slaps. Two slaps. It's first and ten. I'm like can we go somewhere else and do this? Dude one time I was yeah. Yeah that was like it was a it was a lot it was overwhelming. I'm like damn so we're really doing this like for a live audience too half the time.

Right. Yeah. And like that's not part of the job description, man. Like we're putting on live shows too. Dude, I would do games in college. And you remember the press box at the old key. You know, you know it well over there at old U of I. Right? You're up there and it is a single row.

There's no dividers of anything. I know. Give me a fake wall. All right. So I'm up there. My college self. It's like my fifth time doing play by play, which, by the way, everybody thinks it's so hard or so it's so easy. It's not.

It's insane. Especially when you have another slap, as you say, who's the color commentator analyst, never played football. What's he bringing? Right? So weird, man. How do you think you can do it without knowing anything? So, you mean, you're just regurgitating a bunch of like grudin things you heard on. Monday night football at that point.

Like, I'm doing play by play and I'm up there and you have your headset on, right? So you get this kind of like false sense of security because you have your headset on and you can just pretty much hear you and your partner who's talking. But the second you take that headset off, you realize, oh my God, no one has been saying a word in here the entire time just been listening to my ass called this division. two football game. Just some boozy wife in there like I'm like what are you even doing here lady? Like it's nice outside dude one time I got good at like setting up the

audio stuff for broadcasts and one time I just went all the way on top where like the D coordinators go. Oh shit there was no D coordinators at the top I was like bro we're doing this outside bro I don't care if it rains we're doing this outside so we're just just going ham very top of the press box like you weren't even allowed up there.

I was just like, can we pop this thing open up here? I know your ass had six extension cords to be able to make that possible to plug in all the shit and connect down to the press box. Dude, there wasn't even a table. It was just me and Coach P. arms folded on the top. It was pretty sick. Oh, yeah. That'd be ideal.

You could see everything from up there, man. Nobody in your vision, nobody in your way trying to write shit down or look down at your notes or, you know. And like it just feels good that there's nobody. Like you're just, you're better when you're just like in your own room talking about it. Like you don't have to worry about people in there thinking like, oh my God,

ready to be talking about. I don't know. You know what I mean. Because I've been in there, man. I've been in that situation where like the SID and some of his little fuckstick buddies are over there and they're like kind of making jokes, making fun of like the college broadcasters doing their thing. That's tough, man.

You get a little insecure, you know? So yeah, it's good to have that that, that free. them, that flexibility in your own space. I think I've listened to more college broadcasters than anyone ever in my whole life. Just listening to Radio Broadcast of Division 2 football. Oh shit, that's right. Yeah, you were listening to strictly.

You're probably listening to Rake, dude. A lot of 887, dude. A lot of 887, the diamond. That's where I come from, baby. Dude. But there'd be a couple. couple because they'd like rotate. Oh yeah.

Week 6, 2007, I'd be like, that guy can rip. Yeah. You're like, yeah. I might see him on Channel 8. I was like that. That dude's pretty sharp. But then, hey, some? They're like, oh. And you got families listening to that? Bro, they'll throw anybody on there.

Do you have eyes? Yes. Okay, you can be the radio broadcaster for the college football game this weekend. How else am I supposed to know? Like you do, families are tuning in. Did they win? I don't know. Like,

anybody, bro. Do you have a voice? Yes. Okay, you can go. You can go ahead and go on air. Yeah.

Play-by-play college broadcasting interview. Do you have eyes? Yes. We'll see you tomorrow. You check two boxes. We know you can see. and you answered so you can talk.

There you go. That's it. Congratulations. I don't even know anything else. It's one of the only jobs, bro. That shit was so fun though, man. God. Honestly, if I could, bro, doing ripping mornings on the diamond,

5 to 10 a.m. doing traffic for all the old people listening to jazz and doing play-by-play. Fucking sign me up. Do it. Jazz. Yeah, clubhouse. I was a morning drive announcer for a jazz station.

And so I'd have to pop on and be like, and that was Lionel Chesshold there with a classic operata. And hey, if you're heading out on 465, you want to make sure that you stay clear of the right lane near the exit. That was me. I did that for like a year and a half. Station knew about that. Station now knows about that.

Station does know about that. Dude, what's up, bro? Can we get a minute? Well, I got to run you through. I got to run you through a all-time parenthood and the clubhouse, all-time parenthood situation that went down on Friday in Disney World. Talk. All right.

So we get to Hollywood Studios. Okay. It's our last, we leave on Saturday evening, so it's our last official day there. It's Riley's birthday. Okay. So you've been there for how many days? We got there the Saturday before. So this was day six of our seven day trip.

Wow. And how's it been going? You know, it's solid. I mean, ups and downs, highs and lows. Where we left off last time, it was,

you know, you were dad mode. Yeah, I was still dad mode. But it was, you know, by that time on Friday, we'd been through it all.

We'd gone to ever all the parks. We'd done everything. We'd been there for a while. I mean, we've been beaten up pretty badly, you know. But we had a little, we had a little rebound on Thursday night because the in-laws took the kids for the evening and me and Rye got to go have a nice dinner in France at Epcot, you know, walk around and have drinks and everything. And that was real nice.

But then Friday, right, it's our last full day there. Get to Hollywood Studios. day starts off hot we meet bb8 we meet chubaca you know right kids are loving it good shit right we got some fun rides that we're looking forward to star wars world now so i'm hype frank's hype it's like noon i wrote the slinky ride by the way you ever read the slinky ride at hollywood studios the the the slink dog from toy story dude i love toys that whole little area they do that better than anything i'm like this is toys story, bro. Like, you feel like you're in his room a little bit. For sure. They crush that. I didn't

ride it, but I saw it. It was a lot of fun. I was like, Riley wanted me to, you know, now I'm like, I kind of, okay, so this is kind of the precursor to it. So I woke up and I was like, I just kind of felt a little like, eh, like my stomach. I mean, I had some wine and stuff the night before for Rye's birthday, but I was like, I don't think this is like a hangover type feel. Like, I just kind of feel shitty. Yeah. And so I was like, I don't know. She wanted me to go on the ride. So I went on the slink ride. And it was honestly awesome. really smooth, good ride. Uh-oh.

So we get off of that and it's like 11.30 noon and Frank is going down for a nap in the stroller. Then all of a sudden he like, we hear him like, he's puking in the stroller. And we're like, oh, man, oh, wow, okay, buddy. Like we clean him up. It wasn't too bad, but we clean him up, get him some water. Oh, are we okay? Yeah, I'm okay.

All right, pal. So then we have reservations for lunch. Woody's Roundup rodeo place, the barbecue joint. So funny to hear this. Woody's roundup. I bet that's good, dude. There's some barbecue there.

What he's throwing down on the grill? Dude, family style barbecue. Oh. Essentially in Andy's room and they do like, the soldiers, they come over and they're like, quick, Andy's coming. Everybody has to be quiet and shit and freeze.

And then they'll come on. They're like, well done, soldiers. He's evacuated. or whatever and you could start talking again. The soldiers, I forgot about those guys. I love them. God, they make the coolest noises when they're like,

you know, yeah, when they fall, yeah, dude. And then they do the drumline shit there. So I'm like, am I at a college football tailgate? This is insane. Just the green dudes all painted. Anyways, we get to our reservation. We sit down. All of a sudden, Frank's like,

Daddy, Daddy, Daddy. And we're like, what, pal? What's going on? Rye's sitting across at the table. We just sit down. She's like, he's got to puke. I literally just put my hand, like, in front of his mouth, full dad, and he just pukes right into my hand. All good.

All right. That's number two. Are you, you know, you feel okay? We get some water in him. We get some more stuff in him. What's going on? Crenone. Then all of a sudden, he kind of like, he kind of like sits down and wants to like snuggle up against me.

Pukes all over me again. So then at that point. point we're like, okay, this is a situation we got here. So, Rye takes him to the bathroom. We're trying to clean it up, figure out what we're going to do. The manager comes against me. He's like, sir, um, your, your wife wanted me to come get you. She needs help with your son. He's not doing okay. Now I'm panicking. No, this is what's going on. This is terrible. Going to the family bathroom, Frank, she had to take his shirt off because he puked all over that. He's looking rough. Riley's.

Riley's been puked all over. No, Frank didn't even go on it. That's like a grown-up ride. So we're sitting here in Hollywood Studios. People actually, they're like to give us a voucher to go up to the front and get him a shirt. They're like, don't worry about any of this. Don't worry about any of this. You know, we'll take care of it.

Like, just we're here to help. So we're like, all right, cool. So Frank's, you know, he's puking, right? So like, all right, we got to get out of here. So we get out of there to have the voucher. He's just laying in rise arms with his shirt off walking through Hollywood. studios. That's what's up.

Dude, you get a picture of that? Yeah. That's kind of hard. I'll have to check. But meanwhile, I'm walking to the front store and I, as I'm walking there pushing Mira, I passed someone who I went to high school with, who used to be in kind of the same crowd and not anymore.

And so I just, I rushed right past that, dated one of my friends, you know, one of those situations. But they're out of that. What's it? Who is it? Camp. Can't. Dude, you don't have to...

You can just tell me it's Cam Smock. You don't have to... It was a chick, man. It was dated one of my friends. I just had to pull some name out. I don't know. So I'm already in like a movie of like, what the hell?

My kids getting sick all over Hollywood Studios. Huh? You know, one of those in a movie where they pass like at Wolf of Wall Street when you don't know. But he looks out the window when the, then they're in that Italian bus that boat that rescued him

and he just sees a plane blow up and he's like, swear to God. And that was that moment. I like, everything's panicked around me. What's going on? Huh?

Okay, nope, can't focus on that right now. So weird. So I did one of these. I go, mirrors in front of me. I saw this lady out of the corner.

My eye was like, oh my God. So I did the old, I peaked up on the stroller like, you all right, Mira? So it's like I was distracted. love those moves bro

I pulled it on me quick too dude I was pretty proud myself I'm going to talk to you moves nobody's better at them I'll tie my shoe bro I don't even have laces I'll tie my shoe

don't want to talk to you sorry I don't have laces Morton sandals tying my shoe Ha ha ha ha You go So I'm like All right eventually this kid He's like he's done it like three or four times now

Hopefully he's just gotten it out of them. Okay. Yeah. We're going up to Hollywood Studio's front store to get a shirt. Panic and picking out a shirt. They're like, do you need a shirt too? I'm like, yeah, sure. That's good. One for my wife. Cool. All right. Riley meets me in there. She's got Frank. We're in the front of the store. Get ready to check out. He's like, Daddy. She's like, here he wants you. As she's

handing him over to me, just cute. More? Right. Right, right down in my chest all over on the ground in the store. Everybody now looking at us. I'm like, God, take him out, right? He's still getting sick on the side of the store. We're going to first day. I mean, this is like, everybody's looking at us. Like, this is like, we're apocalyptic zombies because we just have puke all over our

shirt and our arms and our pants. And so we go to first aid, we try to lay him down there for a little bit. They don't do jack shit. Finally, we're just like, screw it. We got to get back to the hotel, all right? Get back to the hotel. He somehow holds off puking inside of the sky. that they go on, you know?

Like, there's a race against time. Race against time. I had the bag ready to go. He didn't like it, of course. First time he's ever puked. He's two years old. He's two years old. He don't know what the hell's going on. So we get over on the skyliner, doesn't puke.

Thank God. Make it back to our hotel. All of a sudden, I'm like, okay, well, all of our clothes, now he's puking in the bed. He's puking on all of our shit in the hotel room. Like, this is a situation. We've got to figure this out. All right. He doesn't look good.

All of our stuff's covered in puke. What the hell are we going to do? wind up going to the hospital in Orlando. No way. No way. Like there's not a Disney hospital? I mean, Welcome to the hospital.

Seems like you puked a little bit gorge. Yeah, that would be something. No, they don't have one. Like, it's the one that's tied into it, but it's not like a Disney hospital. It's just like the one that's in Orlando. So yeah, I guess it's the Disney one. The nurses are all like animatronic.

Yeah, it's just another ride. Dude. God damn it. This kid's sick. So, long story short, we get to the hospital. He was just super dehydrated. I think he had a little bit of a stomach bug thing. Yeah.

They gave him some zoffran, gave him two popsicles. Boom. Back. So back. Never been more back. obstacles. See you. But man, running through Hollywood studios on the last day you're in Disney with your kid puking on you. That's, uh, that's an experience. Made the trip, though. What's the trip without the puke day? Got to have a puke day. I mean, yeah, it was one of those.

I looked at Rye when we were in the hospital and it was all said done that he was like, okay. And, you know, I was just like, hey, this is this is, this is life, baby. This is memories. You knew. knew it was going to happen. He knew it was going to happen deep down. There's going to be a crazy day. If he got a whole fam on Disney vacation, one of the days is going to be like, okay,

sound the alarm. Yeah. This is a birthday you won't ever forget there, babe. Have you a birthday in a hospital, puke all of you? That was my Friday. It was insane. But I had to share with you.

and the clubhouse. Station knows about this now. You got anything? Um, I was leaving for New Jersey. Go ahead and go ahead and go. I was leaving for New Jersey and the elevator got stuck with my Uber outside

flights in like an hour. Oh, no. And you were inside the elevator? Say what? You were inside the elevator? Yeah. I don't know what to do, man. and so I call my roommate

and I'm like bro, try to go downstairs to the other side of the elevator and push the button. Maybe something will happen because like, dude, it's early in the morning. Like nobody's up. I'm like, I'm not making it. I'm not making it there. I'm going to miss everything.

Dude, so I manually open the inside of the elevator. And you know how elevators have like three doors? I open that. There's like a gap this big. Dude, so I got to crawl. out of the elevator, just race against time, hoping it doesn't slice me in half. Oh my God. Crawled out of there in like eight minutes, like savage mode, bro, like kicking my suitcases through this little opening, like, my roommate's like pulling my leg through. Bro, if it would

a dude, I would be gone. Dead. Wouldn't that be a funny way to die though? How'd he die? Elevator chopped them in half. I'd be like, yeah, makes sense, dude. Makes sense. Elevator chopped them in half on the way to a comedy show. Dude, rest of peace, Benny. Duh. And, like, I'm trying to get the security footage because that shit is going to be wild.

Like, it's lobby footage, bro. They got it. I saw my landlord walking around. I was like, yeah, let's run back the tape. Oh, my God, dude. Wednesday, 5 a.m. Run it back, dude. I got to have it.

Send it to my email. But yeah, that's what happened to me on the way to the show. Great show. New Jersey. God damn, I love you guys. Some real clubhouse fan out there, bro. Some real. Boy, Chris was out there.

That's cool. No, there are a few others, too, that were like, yo. Like, I love you guys. So I can go back and shout out names and stuff. But they were just, they're just real down. Real homies, dude. That's awesome. Holy shit, dude, that's immediately, when you've said that, when you were like, I open it up and there's a little bit of an opening there.

I was like, don't tell me you went through that because, yeah, that's like immediately the way to assume the second that thing would fire off, you're done. I know, I know. But I was like, what am I supposed to do? I could be stuck in here for like, you know, that's when like the fires were going on out here and like. Uh, what priority. Yeah. I was like, I got to go, bro. I got to get out of here. And my roommate was even like, bro, I've got to get out of here. And my roommate was even like, bro, bro, I've seen that TikTok where like the elevator like dude you're you might be dead and I was like let's let's go bro we might have like 15 seconds but for like for two seconds dude I was stuck like I couldn't get like my my butt and hips through I was like are you panicking were you like freaking the fuck out yeah a little bit because I was just sitting there with my legs like through

the opening and like I was like bro if this thing starts like I'm chopped in half I was like, I got to get out of here. And I just remember, like, if your head can get through like an opening, they say like your whole body can. And I was like, come on, it's got to be possible. But I just slipped through. Cracked every bone in my back felt so good. I was like, okay.

Well, good is new. Yeah, yeah. A thousand ways to die. You end up on the show. Please. Yeah, what's your end goal? I just want to be on a show. one day a TV show.

Oh yeah, what show? A thousand ways to die. He was chopped in half by an elevator. I know you're dying to know how. That was a yeah, dude. Just like you would have been like a fucking head of lettuce, dude. You know, he set that thing down and then just, that would have been you.

I know. I got to get out of there somehow. So did your room, you, did you at least. allow for him the chance to press on the button to see if anything. Yeah. It was like, you know when you're like super panicking? It was like a 10 minute time span.

It seemed like half an hour. But I was like, do you press the button? He was like, yeah, man, nothing's happening. And I was like, you know, wait a little longer. And I was like, what if I just try to open these elevator doors? Like, I don't know. Let me see if I can slide it. First one slid open.

Then I just kept like moving shit. because I was like savage panic mode pulled them all open and I could see my roommate and I was like bro I'm coming out of there so you went feet first yeah you know head first might have been the move

actually no I think about it I was just thinking of like a more of a diving kind of you know what I mean like it was like at the top though oh you had to go like the opening was at the very top of the elevator and you went feet first through that

How the hell did you do that? It was just the gap was like at the top of the elevator door. I don't know. The elevator just stopped in like a weird spot. Right. So I had to like jump down. Like I had to like, it wasn't like a, it wasn't like on the floor level. Oh.

So my feet were like dangling kind of high. I don't know. This is crazy to like try to paint this picture over. I've got pictures. I was obviously like I got to record this first thing that comes to mine yeah I was like dude not get me out of here not get my luggage not hopefully

this elevator doesn't start I'm not going to find this but this is this is in my uh you saw my tweet back to you right is this this is the shoe version of me yeah why because I love I love I just always love these you've always loved them and like I just like when I think of you forever. It'll be like wearing Toronto Raptors purple shorts.

No like ankle. No show socks. Those shoes. And. Red jeep. Like a like a white V neck. Sick, dude.

I'll take it. Like 2010. You know, like that. That's it. Yeah. Maybe those are the comments this week under the video or review ratings. what's what's the shoe that never got enough love i tweeted it out and there's a lot of clubhouse

in the comments i can tell dude the clubhouse went in on that but for me it's this one i don't know why but i remember jemal mashburn had him when he played for the heat and i was just like what are those shoes and always wanted them so bad could never find them and i think i found them one time and they were just too much money and i don't know you know what those shoes are those are the perfect that you'd see in like a 1999 college football championship highlight where they're playing in on AstroTurf. Oh, he's wearing those in a football game.

Yeah, bro. Somebody's returning a kick in those. Oh. You're so right. That is so true. So it's the duality. You're like, oh, oh, Jamal Mashburn in the heat. Oh, Peter Warwick.

Oh, okay. Gone down the sidelines, 80 yards. Hey, are you on this? I think you're talking about it a couple weeks. but are you like Marcus Freeman's doing it for you right yeah you you're cool with Notre Dame now you think that they're at least cool because of Marcus Freeman right and it's amazing what a coach yeah dude because like dude if Brian Kelly's the coach of Notre Dame right now nobody likes them not not a second no no one like I can't name one

player on Notre Dame team right now but like they've got cool social social media and the coach is cool. So I'm like, I mean, they're not bad. Like, I can see them winning. It's Ohio, wait, it's Ohio State Notre Dame. Yeah, bro. Kind of a kind of a throw up puke championship, but I guess Notre Dame because the coach is cool. For you. Yeah. I mean, you. I mean, both schools kind of can't go Ohio State. It's just the, the national championship for every Midwestern dad. Big time. I had a couple notes. I was thinking about what like what stadium do you think of I love this when you think of football stadium you know it's just like the simply put just a football stadium what comes fine just like what

level any level any level football stadium um I think of a high school football field really yeah like a like a dope one or or you know like a Texas one or like a no not a good I never think of a good stadium. When I think like playing football, I think of like honestly like almost almost like a Catholic grade school football field because that's just probably where I played the most football. Like if I'm really thinking about it,

like I've never played at like a big D1 stadium. Right. I've never played like at an NFL stadium. So I don't really think of football there. I think of football like on a crappy field, scoreboard doesn't work like bleachers all messed up like you know just on the side

when they do get a new scoreboard is like the big deal in town you know it was a big deal though dude when our Catholic grade school got a scoreboard I was like can we like come out from under that thing yeah for the game like we need a util like we got fucking bro

this is nice like we got LC like we got cool numbers on there. Does it have speakers that can like, you know, you get a PA guy or music going on that? I see the little, the speakers on there.

Something's got to come out. We got a DACTronic, tronics in the corner. And they put it in the corner too. They didn't put it like, midfield, right. Yeah.

Yeah. I was like, bro, we kind of got it going on. We got like a nice stadium. You know, churches right here. Just wait until those trees get some leaves on them,

dude. Yeah. And we got one of those field gold nets behind our goalposts. I'm like, hey, what's up? Colts, you need to practice here? What's up? Well, a little home field advantage for St.B on those on the CIO Sundays, baby. It was a little insane.

We got fences. Sometimes people did one. We had a fence on our field, like on the like on the like deep right. There's a road right. Yeah, right next to our field. So that, so it was like a decent fence. And I was like, oh, we got a. fence and one time somebody hung a banner on it.

It was like for the away team though. It was like St. Matthew and I was like, oh, this is now we're getting like, now we're heating up, bro, there's a rivalry. You're putting signs on our fences. We got cheerleaders.

Our concession sand kind of bopping. Did I ever tell you my dad used to like, he worked a deal with the music teacher at our school? Shut up. To like roll out the risers and the speech. speakers on game day and he would hook up his computer and like play your dad did that wins yeah

I love that I love dads that do that but the team's got to be good we're good I mean we went to the final four or city oh that's what's up no but then we lost to Christ the King Christ the King was kind of dirty at football I was like yeah because we talked about last week you have those mean ass wrestling kids with older brothers just beat the shit out of you my God that middle linebacker has hairy legs. It's going to be so good. They had like four kids on their name that

had like it was like van something, you know, Van Gergen, Van Dyke. Dude, whenever there's a van. They're all in the 40s too. Yeah. They got this bar. I'm like, he's kind of like, I don't know if he's like all there. Van Gergan, dude. Always, dude. They always had three names. motherfuckers. First, the small part of the last name and then the longer part of the last name.

Yeah, they all run all stocky. I'm like, God, if that guy gets a hold of me, it's not going to be pretty, dude. I'm like, we can't sweep right

too much today, boys. Hey, cutback lane, coming hard. You better be ready to reverse field. Van Gurgens flying around out there,

dude. Fucking Van Gergan. Too, striper. Like you can tell like he's like he's not just doing pushups. Like he's he's been bench pressing. Like he's the kid that people are like, yeah, you know the fitness, competition for Si-O day.

Yeah, he did 56 pull-ups. Dude, I hear that before a game. I'm like, I kind of don't want to. I might fake sick, dude. I might fake sick on this one, boys. You can't tell me bro does 56 pulse before the game. Yeah, his A. His dad, like, they have like a whole gym in their basement and like half their team went there to work out in the summer.

See you. Basketball season. I've been doing pull-ups and going down the pole at the playground behind my house. Like, I don't even know how to lift weights, bro. I'm just out here pretending I'm work done and shit. Like, come on, man. Like, I got no technique, dude. I just see NFL football.

See and dude. I pretend a Marshall Falk on Sundays out here. Like, that's it. Yeah. Just pretend. You got Van Gergen flying over the top, meeting me at the point of the pile taking me down. Dude, the,

yeah, the scoreboard, dude. Somebody, that was a big deal for any school that I would get one. And it was just like, man, somebody's trying to get a tax break. Somebody wrote a check. I wonder how much. that was though.

$700. Right. At the time, you know, it's all relative when you're in eighth grade. You're like, damn.

Bro, when we got a scoreboard, I was like, we better be, we better be good, man. How about the scoreboards and grade school

and CYO gyms and like high school or middle school gyms just being the most obnoxious, horrible sound of all time. Couldn't be worse. E.

I mean, just couldn't be worse. And so long. I was like, yo. Dude, I always got so pissed off at that. It was such a sharp noise. I was like, damn. Like, dude, there's nobody here. Right.

Eight people in the crowd. It's 9 a.m. You're playing St. Maliki in a cold gym. All of a sudden. Holy! There's a teradactyl in the corner of the gym. I'm like, yo, it's just a sub in. I don't even know how to sub in.

And that's the noise. I'm like, this is a haunted house. This is a gym. I got cold pruny hands. Cold hands. My pits are sweaty. And like, they're like making my under my ribs sweaty now because they're rubbing up against them because I'm in a basketball jersey. I don't know.

Sweaty ribs, dude. And like my shoes are wet from outside because it's snowing. and my dad's mad at me. My dad got mad at me on the way to the game. He got mad at me because I stayed up way too late playing video games at Danny Cox's house the night before when I had a game the morning. God, that's crazy. Hey, because you were kind of like running around a little too much and you had to leave

at a certain time, you know? Hey, we got to leave at 9.30 a.m. games at 10.30. St. Maliki. so we don't really know where we're going. Didn't get out of the door to like 9.50 because you were like making sure you had everything. Your dad's mad at you the whole trip. Playing pump up music for you in the car. You're like, you're mad at me.

Why should I get pumped up? The place. And you know, even if you have a good game that there's still like going to be a discussion after, you know? Like maybe if I play well enough, he'll just forget this whole thing. Nah. Couldn't play. Couldn't play well. Sorry, everybody's mad at me now, damn.

Dude, the drive to these places, yeah, when it was in a, like, what seemed like a foreign land, you know, when it was really 25 minutes across town. I was like, this got to be an hour and a half away. Road game, man. Yeah, fucking Road Warrior. I have no idea where this is. What? They have a Culver's over here, too?

They got a pretty nice Burger King by their school. That's insane. Hey, maybe if I play good enough and he forgets about being pissed, so we can get something after. Just four Wopper juniors after. Hey, you had a good rebound over that one kid.

Do you want some onion rings? Did he drop 20? You drop like 25, maybe get like a double double somehow? Just go off. How about one of those like Sunday Burger King pies? Just something you never get, you know? You guys beat St. Simon?

They were number one, bro. They had that. redhead kid and that tall kid you guys beat them he's got a burger king hey pick what you want you want to die you want a sprite yeah you had a good rebound over that van gurgen kid

all right chicken fries bk good enough for me the kid that's like six seven and eighth grade you got a rebound over him he's I think he's yeah he's got like he's got like an offer from Florida already

like one of those he went to their camps he went to their camps mil kifers like talked about he's got the t-shirt he posted about it on my space so you know he's got the t-shirt Florida developmental camp it really god good thing i really donovan before the game really donovan on his ass i wouldn't even have tried to line up against them

uh my answer for that is what stadium do you think football stadium i think Raymond James where the Bucks play. Oh, that's an OG cool stadium. Every time I see the overhead shot of that and I obviously wrote it down because I was watching Sunday night last night. I'm just like, that is, that is football. That is a football stadium right there. I've never wanted to go to a pro game at a stadium more than that one.

Like the, the boxiness rectangle of it, the rings where people are walking in it. Yeah, it like, it is like, it looks cool how it like extends. like even the nosebleeds, like they make that look cool. Then you got the pirate ship. And the camera angle too. Oh, really? Like, it's a good camera angle.

When you're watching it, it feels like cozy and at the right level. Like, when I watch games at Philly, I feel like I'm looking down on it. I hate that. You know, when I'm watching games at Lucas Oil, like Colts games, I feel like it's, I feel like the camera angle is like down. Too high. I can't stand it. Bro, that's a good, uh, I've just, sometimes I don't think of that. Like when they're building stadiums, you know they're like, oh yeah, they don't need, that doesn't even cross their mind.

Should. That's what's fucking paying for it all. The camera angle. Yeah. Hey, you can tell like NBA camera angle like like versus college basketball. Like they're all so different. Assembly Hall. Two down, dude.

Like I need. Yeah. Buck's camera angle is like I feel like it's like 10 feet up from the field. Yeah, you're just right there. You see you're right there in your living room. It's just, it's perfectly pictured,

framed. It is good. It's always real sunny. And even night games. Yeah, even night games. I'm just like, hey,

like you said last week it's a little bit of like, are we doing something tonight? Like it's Tampa. It's warm. What are we doing after the game? Pirates. shit blasting shit off. Sick.

It doesn't get better. All right, let's check some clubhouse here. Team of these guys are Gmail. that gam, to, gum, to gum, to gum, uh, from Samantha. Origin stories for the win. Here we go.

Longtime, second time. Two things. One, origin stories. Caught up in the last seven episodes over the couple of weeks. I don't know what made it just now dawn on me. But part of the reason I get such a kick out of listening that these guys is the origin story shares.

There's something about close from childhood friendships going strong into adulthood. The ones you can text one word or line two and might as well have sent a movie reel. I started daydreaming about what a podcast with my best friend would look like in another life. Inside joke, origin stories galore, a favorite thing called Don't Call Me, I'll Call You. Wow. Could work. You could see that being a good title. We could feature occasional pop-ins from our two other main squeezes who have my mind.

much more demanding lives as lawyers and eye surgeons. Honestly, it would just be 70% sporadic movie and SNL quotes. Solid. Solid. Yeah. I can, you are,

it's like, I can hear that being just like a radio show too. Mm-hmm. You're now listening to don't call me. I'll call you. Like on public radio or something, you know? The amount of times I've texted that to one of my friends,

do, because like your mom's asleep. I'll call you. House phone shit. I don't know. That's what I'm thinking. Yeah, I'm just trying to... If that makes sense for that,

I'm just trying to think of what I'd rather make the call or be younger... I never want to make the call. Can't tell. Number two here. Packers and Steelers, I went to Christmas Day,

uh, Pitt Kansas City game with my dad. Yikes. As a lifelong Packers fan who has gone to Lambo twice, it's hard to be impressed by other stadiums and home teams. I have to say the Steelers and those terrible towels really brought it. Additionally, thank you for validating that other people think about Brett Parv's heyday as much as I do.

Always appreciate the perennial side route on the ship. Come to Greenville, South Carolina. Forever, your burpiest girl, Sam. Wow. Love a burpee girl. South Carolina. Yeah, I mean, you know, that was a shit game, but the Steelers always do have,

no matter what happens to the game. that terrible towel twirl right before kickoff you've never seen it have you been i don't think uh no i've seen it but not like in real life in person it really like even the tv like even the cameras and everything doesn't do it justice like literally this year when we're at the raven sealers game and november we're get back from the concession stand to our seats as they were starting the terrible towel twirl like you just walk out and it's this is really really a little bit of the concession stand to our seats as they're starting the terrible towel twirl I think you just walk out and it's this is really overwhelming. I mean,

it really is like something to witness when you look around the stadium. They're all going. But it's shit team. It's going nowhere. No direction. Franchise going nowhere. Pittsburgh. From Luke.

Hypothetical Jersey situation. So, burpee boys. I needed Ben's opinion as a jersey head and Joe's opinion as a Jersey head and a Bitsberg Steelers fan for this all caps hypothetical situation my brother and I thought of. You got a Steelers Ravens game at Heinz Field. We'll never call it Accurure. Feel that? Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. That's the new name of the stadium? What is it? Acrecher Stadium. Get out of here.

Yeah, insurance company. You paid top dollar. As you're walking to your seat, you're approaching a guy wearing a backwards NFL New Era hat and a number 53 Cleveland Browns jersey. You think, what's with this guy? This place is a littered with Ravens and Steelers fans. As you pass him, you turn around to see what jersey it is to find out that the backwards hat was a Steelers hat and the jersey is a Bill Cower jersey from his playing days as a linebacker. Just as a Steelers fan, reppping his team with an obscure jersey, slot my ass and let me know if this goes hard or not. Yeah, that does go super hard. That's a, that might, that might the hardest ever. How are you not going to like that if you're a Steelers fan?

Bro, that's like you know what you're doing. You did your research. I didn't even know he played in the NFL. I would look that up on my phone. I'd go Bill, Bill Cowher NFL jersey. And I'd be like, oh, yeah, that all. Let's sit. I do, I do love it on just the idea of it. It does, I don't know, just the idea of wearing a Browns jersey, even though it's Bill Cower. yeah you're more is my hold up is my hold up i get the idea i do think it's cool that like you said he went out of his way to be like hey i'm gonna be this different i love bill cower i'm reping his ass he's a pittsburgh guy he's our coach but still it's just like ah still browns dude yeah it's a coward jersey but it's a brown jersey that goes hard man i don't know you got to switch it up

because he might have been wearing Steelers jerseys for 15 games straight, you know? That's true. Yeah. Has a whole closet full of each game day. What he's going to do? And that was the one. Yeah. And it's kind of funny, too, in a way, because the Ravens were born out of the Browns.

So there's a little bit of tie in. Oh, I didn't think about that. I could have been going for that. I like when people wear jerseys of guys that have been on like past team at current game. because you like start to get like dude oh shit that's a you know

that's a guy that's on our team so like if somebody was wearing a Rams Baker Mayfield jersey at the Bucks game last night bro yeah all the way I think that's a cool or when somebody wears like the college jersey

of the that's so sick to me it's a lot of that Buffalo yesterday a lot of Josh Allen Wyoming That's so hard. God dang it. I love that so much.

There's nothing cooler to me than that. Like, oh, you got his college? Derwin James FSU Jersey at the Chargers game. Bro. Come on. Or like even an old player, Ladinian Tomlinson TCU Jersey at a Chargers game. What's up?

Who's mad? Somebody goes crazy with it and gets Baker Mayfield, Texas Tech. Oh my God. And yeah. It would be such a fake jersey. It'd be such a fake one though. I know.

I know. But still. People used to do that a lot. When Dick Lobo was the defense coordinator for the Steelers, you'd see a solid number of Dick LaBealboe Lions jersey. Oh, that's good.

I love it. I love it, man. Peyton Manning, Tennessee, Jersey. you know I never really sell a lot of those honestly I just rate you so hard there but when I did see an orange jersey at a Colts game I was like yo that's that's dirty

that is dirty Edron James Miami so sick at a Colts game bro Marshall Falk Rams at a Colts game what's up what's up how many Marshall Falk jerseys do you have Just one.

I thought, I could have sworn you had. I never thought I'd hear that question ever in my life to me or to anyone else. Bro, how many Marshall Falkters is. That's, that is flatter. I'm flattered forever. I can die. I can die in an elevator now. I could have sworn.

Dude, I could have sworn you had the, the, the St. Louis Navy joint. I do. I know. Yeah, so then you, you know, you had the cult, the black one that you wore in these guys live. dude just watch me walk into your house one day with the San Diego State one what's up bro is that you're all have 95 Marshall Falk jerseys is one of the best a Marshall Falk on a screen if you throw Marshall Falka screen right now he'd crib it bye for sure just reversing field

Marshall Fulg mouthpiece before anybody had one made it cool Marshall Falk on an angle route too Swing an angle Nobody's guarding that How is he so good in space Cool as face mask Nasal strip made me want to wear a nasal strip In fourth grade

Always had his hat on on the Side line took his helmet off Had a hat on He is running back So RB So athletic RB And Chiller figured this out

We always used to play NFL Street and he'd put Marshall Falk at quarterback. Dirtiest QB. Guys, guys that are not QBs that you can put at QB in like video games, Marshall Falk and Antoine Rinal L, obviously. He's kind of a cute. Yeah. Yeah.

Put the ball in the hands your best athletes. See what happened. Sick, Maddenhack. If you had to like go for two and you sub Antoine Randallel L. in at QB over like whoever they had, but Ben Routtsburgh or Tommy Maddox or something like that. O'Donnell. Oh.

Brian St. Pierre. Oh, my God. When he got number two, I was like, I might get that jersey. St. Pierre on the back? You just gave me a little rake to St. Pierre. When he got number two, I said, I might get that jersey. Not bad for a fat guy. Not bad for a Steelers fan.

Not bad for a fake Steelers fan. This is from Chiona. St. Pierre. Says, hey, Joey and Ben, I'm really behind on the pod, but I binge watch on the weekends. Oh, sweet. That's awesome. I haven't been watching the episodes in order, but I have noticed that Joey, your hat game is fire, especially the white Mickey Dad Hat. And Ben, you're looking naturally tan.

Naturally. Ah. And I'm looking naturally gross and tail and green because it was 49 degrees in Disney World all week. No tan. is so true. You look so like when you get a tan, it's like, people are like, do you get a tan? You know? Like Tony Romo yesterday. I don't know if you saw any of those clips on on Twitter or anything. Tanny Romo. Romo was, he looked like, he looked like Tim Allen and Christmas with the cranks. Like, it was, it was bad. Oh, he looked white or tan? Tan, but and Christmas with the cranks.

I know you haven't seen it, but they're going to the island. They're getting away for Christmas. and so Tim Allen goes and gets a tanning bed and he looks all crazy fake tan. Me every day. Shona says, I would have come with sports question, but y'all lost me after Brett Farr, pretending to know sports is like talking to that guy who stays by the water dispenser at your office job asking you, how's your weekend?

Slop my ass, tear my ACL, run me over with a diesel truck, and ask, I should know about that. Man, two burpee girls this week. I love it so much. Dude, burpee girls get it more than ever, man. It's because, you know what? I think this is, I think this is it. I think it's because you and I are both families of three who have two sisters.

So we have a way, you know, that they get us because we grew up with. Yeah. We grew up with the females. I could talk to a burpy girl probably for seven years straight. Just nonstop. Amazing. So there's a small, small but mighty group. Um, this is from Mitchell.

Dante Cole Pepper's shotgun stance. What is it? His feet are a little wider, aren't that? I get, I got to look it up. I haven't looked it up yet. I did do my show prep because a station didn't know. Show prep station didn't know about Dante Cole Pepper shotgun. Turf shoes.

Dante Cold Pepper's turf shoes. Yeah. Can I go ahead and get that clip of Colpepper and the shotgun, please. God, have a better last, you can't have a better name, dude. Don't say, Colpeper? Just stop at name. Number 11, too, bigger QB? How do you not love them?

Arm bands? Just unleashing it. Play for so many teams. Cool Vikings, though. Yeah, no, he looks a little wide. He's a little wide, bro. Dante Colpepper. God.

Let's see what Mitchell's got to say. The first game of my Lions fandom I remember watching was Thanksgiving 2008. They lost 4710, and all I remember is Dante Colpeper wearing the throwbacks and having a weird stance in the shotgun where his arm just stretch way out in front of them. So my question to these guys is, what would your shotgun stance be?

Relaxed, low crouch, hand clap, or leg kick, smack mask with the Drew Henson knockoff jersey from the game I may or may not buy for 16 bucks from a questionable website Mitch. This is a great question, dude. Hey, get the Drew Henson baseball jersey. That's hard.

Drew Henson Yankees. Then just willy-nilly played football too. Oh, you're that athletic? Insane, bro. Insanity. Drew Henson is supposed to be so next that Michigan never was, really. It makes me sad that Brady documentary where he, yeah. I know.

Now he just like sells insurance and plays golf every day. Like, bro, you're a starting quarterback from Michigan and like played for the Yankees. Got drafted by the Yankees. Now you're just manning the grill at the company outing. I don't know, dog. Love you though. Good question. Yeah, I don't like the hurts like super deep squat.

don't like that. My favorite is Dennis Dixon, Oregon. Just looks so smooth back there. Like, he's done it all his life. And he, I don't think, he did this, too. The point down.

Like, he'd, like, point down and the center would see it and snap it. Oh, instead of the guard hitting the center, you would point, okay. I remember that shit. Sometimes clap. I was like, what is it, what is, I don't know what he's doing,

but he looks so sick while doing it. Hey, let's talk. Payton Manning shotgun stance? Horrible. He's just got his own vibe, though, you know? It's not, it's ugly. It's not cool. But I'm like, he's putting his, his,

that's his lunch pail, bro. He's going to work clocking in. He doesn't care what he looks like. He's going to drive you down the field in 47 seconds and get six points. I know. And it's because of all that he was so good that like, yeah, you can you can start backwards for all I care, you know? Yeah. But I mean, looking at it, you're like, uh, dude, he was a, he was an ugly player.

Everything. You just love, he's, it's so Indiana. A quarterback that embodies the city, but it was so like middle class, bro. He had the, the, the rib protector. I hate it when, like, cool QBs have rib protectors. I just want to tell all the girls. Like, guys, that's not what he, like, that's just for his rib. He doesn't really look like that.

Like, I know you guys don't understand that he's not fat. Like, it's just his rib protector, okay? Yeah, I'd probably be relaxed, though. I'd probably be like, like, uh, like Cam Newton, like, uh, Jaden Daniels. Cam Newton, the loudest cadence ever. You're just back there, though, like, you know, you just got a nice, like, you're, you're, light, you know, you're light on your feet. It's like Rocky 3.

I was just watched that before I came up here. You know, Paul Creed's like, hey, man, balls of your feet, light. you know what I mean? An Apollo Korean Rocky start jumping rope together. I love it. A little light, a little clap, yeah.

Maybe not like those fake, the loud one, just like a nice, just a nice clap and let's roll. You know, snap the ball and let's play. I like staggered feet a lot. Yeah.

Staggered feet, just like, not Cam Ward, chill. That's too chill. Yeah. Cam Ward, I'm like worried about.

I'm like, I don't even know if he knows he's out there. Did he forget it was a game? I think that you nailed it. That's what did it for me with Manning. Just like the straight box out, you're getting ready to shoot a free throw ass feet. And like always doing this to the crowd.

Like you guys, like the home crowd, bro. When Peyton Manning would like quiet us, I'd be at the Colts game like hype. Offens was on the field. We're about to score. And he'd be like, okay, bro. Baggy sleeves.

Peyton Manning's body. language. I wasn't, I was like, dog, you're, you're kind of annoying a little bit. Like, the way he runs. I mean, come on. Bro, and he used to call the run play to like Joseph Adai and just pull it and take it. You know, Joseph Adai a little bit was like, God, damn it. Come on, dog. Hey, every time though, that's my thing. That's like my first memory of football from my childhood. besides Warren Sapp and Brett Farr of getting into it at Raymond James Stadium. My first one. Sapp and Farrf kiss already.

All right. My first one is just every time thinking, is he going to get there in that stretch play? Oh. Is Manning going to get to Edron James? It is a tough angle. Dude, he would. And it's sprint, man. everything out there reach as far as it can sprinting so hard just to get out for the stretch play

why did he did that on purpose right so the play action would yeah that's hard but every time you're so right nobody's arm was more locked out than pain manning on this on the stretch play to edron james i was like i was like yo i'm a stealers fan but i don't know he's going to get it hustling the definition of hustle bro have you seen the i know you haven't i don't know why ever even start anything with that but there's a NFL films little special or something NFL film special on Peyton Manning and it takes you inside like he went his alma modern Tennessee invited him to come back and speak to them the coaching staff and he comes in and you know I think it's a live Shriver on there who's doing it the guy from Hardnogs he's like

what they thought would be a 20 minute meet and greet turned in to three hours. And it's, it's just Peyton, like, up there and he's running him through all these things and, like, running him through him practicing for the Colts and why he ran out there for those stretch plays and why he did the bag drills and why, you know, and it's Peyton just talking about like reps and why these things matter and everything. It's a really good watch. I suggest it.

Just pulled up on YouTube. And, yeah, I don't really know I was going with that. No, no, I did it. I guess he got in the zone. just started telling them everything. It's just so classic, right? Like, why every dad, everybody, he was loving. It's just like, hey, that guy, you know, he prepares.

Yeah. And he works hard. And it's just everything you hear about Peyton Manning, dude, just, oh, nothing but film. And every rep is the hardest rep you've ever done. I, he, he hammers at home. And that little films thing. Lunch pale QB, bro.

Love him so much. Uh, last one here from, Sam, Richard Sherman and Stephen A. Smith, Alberto Beef Jerky commercial. I remember it. I was like, damn, they really got both of them? Was that when Richard Sherman, it was like real hot? Oh, man.

For like two years, Richard Sherman is on top of the world. After he burned Skip Bayless and that, when he's like, I'm better than you at life. And then he was everywhere. That's crazy. It was the crab tree. Didn't he snatch his chain? is that that play and then the the the aaron andrews post game interview that was crazy

yeah you try me with the stories or stever like crabtree all right so burpy boys long time listener first time emailer here right on dude was driving around earlier and randomly remembered that oberto beef jerky commercial where richard sherman talks to stephen a who plays a little voice in his stomach i was wondering what are some of your favorite commercials over the years featuring professional athletes also an unreasonable related comments since this isn't a sports podcast. I'm a truck driver for a beer company that has a big logo on the trailer. And something that never gets old is when people pull up next to me and go,

Hey, I'll save you the trouble. Just go ahead and load that up on my trunk. Ease. Never gets old. Ease. Take me out to a night on the town to Texas Roadhouse, order the steak and shrimp combo,

medium rare. Take me back home with the whisper of station about this and my ear and then smack my ass. Sounds lovely. Dude, love it. Should be my job. Texas Roadhouse? I mean, just, come on. What's better than a night,

a Thursday night at Texas Roadhouse? Nothing more hype. There's a game on. Dude, the bar that's in the square in the middle, right? You got peanuts there. You got the bread with the cinnamon butter. Filling up on that bread, dude. I'm like, do they even cook this?

The pop is just a soda pop. just better there. It is. Steak fries that come out. You're like, hey, you know what? I'm going to change it up. Can I get a strawberry lemonade? Oh, the strawberry

lemonade. The server's like, sure. Even if they don't have it, they just like find a way to make it for you. We don't have one, but like we have lemonade and like this like grenadine

and we can do it. We can do it. You're just like, whatever, babe. Not saying no to anything tonight. Miami of Ohio is on TV. never had better times than sit my happy ass down at Texas Roadhouse me at Texas Roadhouse so happy dude oh it's amazing it's amazing it's just like one of those underappreciated things

it's never not going to be good I've never had a bad time there because the bar's kind of low but you're like they crush it I think it's true too it's just something about us like you know above average means, I guess, but not wealthy family upbringings where it's like, hey, you're at Texas Roadhouse on a Thursday night. It's a big fucking deal. It is. I used to ask for Texas Roadhouse for my birthday dinner all the time to go. That was my birthday.

God, what an affordable thing. I don't want to go anywhere else, man. From like 14 to 19. August 28th. See me at the nearest Texas Roadhouse. What's up? Chocolate volcano. Me and my family and my mom still,

even if my birthday is still kind of being like, you really need a Coke. We should probably just do waters. Remember the first time you got a chocolate volcano, though? Lava cake thing. It like comes in that like dome peak mountain. Am I allowed to get this?

I felt guilty eating it. I was like, just cutting into like the birthday present thing. Is this a part of it? Because I can, I can do without that if it's cutting into the present. Yeah. I'd rather have like a Texas hoodie than this volcano.

But you want to buy to the volcano? That don't feel as bad? I'd rather have the NHL PS2 game I asked for that I don't really even want. You know what I mean? I'm like, why the fuck that I asked for Midnight Club? Like a weird racing game. Whoa, he's trying to get into something different. it.

Just because Sam Patterson has it or something. Played it at his house one night. Had to get it. Like maybe my parents will just go out and get it. You know? Like on some random shit. Like, all right.

Yeah, my dad got me burnout three. Just imagining your dad being at the table when they come to sing you happy birthday at Texas. What a crazy thing to think about. Yeah. He just gets up. My dad going to like this.

And I'm right there with him. I'm like, yeah, this is so crazy. Oh, we're good. We're good. We're good. Don't do it. Don't do it. Don't do it.

Don't do it. Oh, shit. Like, how'd they even know it was my birthday? Because you don't really tell him. Then when your friends, like your friends is there with his family, he told all the servers to come over to me and sing. It's Joe King. He's like in the corner of the restaurant.

God damn it, dude. Of course, it's joking. Always everywhere. Just trying to embarrass you. You love that friend, though. That friend knows you. Oh, God. Not an inside reminiscent podcast.

Nah, not a Reminiscent podcast. All right. What's the question, Sam? Commercials with athletes. What is it? What is the best one? What's your favorites? Man.

There's a couple of Michael George. commercials that like made me cry one time like on a late night like 11 30 p.m. you know you're just like done with like the day and you're just like on YouTube and in a rabbit hole. There's a couple Jordan commercials like when the different people are acting out Michael Jordan's like historic like this thing. And like all little things he did. I think that's the same one. Made me cry one time in a college computer lab. Hey, not about to shoot that one. I think so, yeah. The music play. Like, they cut to like some kids driveway or like it's like a pickup game outside and some white dude like does the cradle thing like just I was like, oh. Is that the same one where they're showing like flashbacks of all the Jordan athletes like Ray Allen in high school? Oh my God, bro.

Yeah, they got Derek Jeter in there. Joe Johnson Marvin Harrison running up the sideline at Syracuse Oh my God, dude, I'm getting the chills I'm such a monkey That's the one for sure It gets me

I mean, dude This is SportsCenter ones I mean you can just go on Like that that's an entire one all to itself But ones that's sick out there for me when Tiger Woods is just walking through and the gallery is following them and that's it, that's the whole commercial.

There's so many good ones I forget about. I've brought this up before. It's the only one that comes to my mind recently because I just haven't like gone through them and watched them in a while, but the one where like all the, the buccaneer, the pirate, they just take everything.

God dang it. It's so funny. Orrin Scott Man, Pelton, LeBron's throne. And he's like, what he's talking about? Yep, that's a classic one. I think it was maybe Josh Hamilton, put the donuts,

like the weights on their wrists when they're typing highlights, like a baseball bat. He's like, now take them off. And then he's typing quicker. Dude, that's so cool. That's so good. That's what made me want to like work in like

sports media and stuff. Yeah. That commercial alone. And just a simple one, too, like the one where the, I think is John, no, it was, man, why can I remember his name? But he's waiting for the elevator, elevator. Elevator opens up. No, waiting for the elevator, elevator opens up. It's a New Jersey devil just standing there and it's like going up and he just goes.

Oh. And then he gets off the elevator, dude. Come on. There's one where like, I forget what player. Oh, dude. Is it Latian Tomlinson? Dark visors looking for the male And he's fucking it up

Yeah And they're like And all the males falling out I'm like dude I love this He's looking hard at it yeah He's like just take off the helmet But it's perfect Perfect

I wanted to work in those cubicles so bad Like can I just be in a cubicle While like someone walks through Shack Wasn't there like a Shack vending machine one or something Probably Or maybe it was Dwight Howard Same guy

Drew Breeze driving the Marty Garoff float through the security he's backing up traffic that NASCAR dude trying to like take out the speed bump in the parking lot it's like a pickax

yeah crazy I was like this is so sick they want to do they'll do anything for a commercial I love that attitude oh all right I appreciate everybody

I got a goal team these guys at jimmed.com appreciate you guys email the show team these guys at jeml dot com subscribe on youtube these guys clubhouse episode every week uh watch us there so you can see our cool hats and ben's natural tan done natural hey chicago get your tickies february 12th rosemont february 13th leave your rating review comments under there youtube what was our comment this week it's uh what shoe would be somebody Oh, yeah, yeah. What shoe do you want to bring back?

Put the link so we can look. What shoe didn't get enough love? Throw it in the comment. And, yeah, talk to you next time. These guys. Cool. These guys, bye-bye. Kevin Cobb.

Levon Kirkland. You know about this.