THESE GUYS! - When Your Girl Cares About The Game💕

Episode Date: March 26, 2024

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You think every time a girl goes to a pro game, there's like a 25% chance she's going to get proposed to. Do you think that girls think that's what the status? We're going to the game tonight. Like, you think she's like, what if he? I don't have my nails done. Shit, I better wear these boots. Football game. Better wear these boots just in case.

That's why they're so mad during the games because they're not getting proposed to. That's why, bro. I figured it out. TG75. 75 the mean Joe episode what a good strong number that is 75 bro

three quarters oh remember how a quarter would just change your life when you were a kid yeah that big ass cord do you find a quarter on the ground bro you're rich how old are we that like

when I would get yeah I get two of them I get 50 cents and I'm like guess what the fuck up everybody still kind of now though if i have two quarters in my hand i'm like can't tell me shit i'm like one to wear a monocle like the fucking peanut guy there's just something about three quarters just 75 in your hand bro oh yeah you dude that used to be hey easter weekend this weekend when you go on easter egg hunts and they throw two quarters in those little bitches i'd be like i'm I'm cool with this. My sister found the one with 20 bucks, but I'm cool with the little 50 cents.

Do you ever try a quarter collection? Do you ever do that? Oh, yeah. I think I did. Yeah. I had like, I had like eight of them locked in in the like when the quarters were new. Yeah, dude, the different states. Yeah, I was really, but they're all whack states, Pennsylvania. I was like, can we get something nice on the board? Give me Hawaii. Delaware. Give me a Florida. I know all the wacky states were first. I was like, can we fucking get it together, dude? And then like after a while, I was like, nah, I'm good. And I just spent them. Yeah. I'd buy those like little plastic football helmets at Meyer in the, in the core, in the or a sticky hand. I still get down with a sticky hand. I know, man. Why are those so gas? They're so good my mom didn't let me have them. Hey, why did you kind of want to eat them? You mean a bright red one of those? It was it going to be a fucking awesome cherry treat?

The green. Yeah, green apple. Put a sticky hand on my tongue and shut up about it. I would always stick them on the wall. That was the A1 toy for like, for like, you know, when you were poor as fuck as a kid. That was the best toy. My mom was like, she was like, stop. No, no sticky hands.

they leave residue on the walls because they did kind of leave a little a little like grease. I was like, come on. You play with that outside. It's not fun outside. Yeah. Yeah, you thought you were Spider-Man

when you had one of those things. Oh. Trying to get the remote over to you. On the chandelier. That's so sick. Those hands are like all that flavored gum. It's like the first like three and a half

minutes are unforgettable. And then it's once it starts to fade, once you get some degradation on those motherfuckers, gone. Yeah, you ever see a dusty sticky hand rolled up in the bottom of your closet? You're like, what was I doing? My mom was right. But yeah, those first three minutes, yeah, bro. Grabbing everything and shit.

Those are the best, best quarter toy, sticky hands. the football helmets were up there. Putting the decals on a cowboy's helmet as a kid, I was like, I'm Jerry Jones. Lining those up in your room, like on the windowsill. Hey, whoever played that weekend? It was so satisfying about that.

It's so great. You're like doing your own NFL prime time. Huh? You're like doing your own NFL prime time with the mini football helmets in your room. Or were we the only ones who just dreamt to be like the guys on Edge, NFL

countdown? Probably. There's just something so cool about lining those up right. How come I got the Cardinals won like seven times? I was like,

God, they suck. Jake Plummer's a dog, but they suck. I always wanted to make it to where like how they did it on TV to where they would like fly,

you know what I mean? They would like fly up together. Yeah. We go to Lambo. You know, and then it's like the Vikings and the Packers

and, never could never could speaking of Lambo I'll be in Green Bay May 16th pushing tickies pushing tickies

Pushing ticks ticks text April 17th Buffalo night before the NFL Draft 24th of April Detroit Kansas City May 2nd Minneapolis May 7th

Chicago May 15th Green Bay May 16th pushing ticie What a run What a freaking run for me Hartford April 18th

God damn it Omaha May 1st and Syracuse May 30th those are my next three and then all the rest of the shows are on Benedictpolice.com

or in my bio or in the description you know where to find it Pushin tickeys Push and tikes Did you watch any March Madness? I didn't Oh and remember to watch

Lovers and Liars CW April 11th It's going to be a good one It's going to be fun It's going to be fun It is You got like I know and you're like

I don't watch reality TV Like dude it's me Like it's going to be stupid And you can make fun of me the whole time So there you go Right April 11th CW That's the play

Like I'm not I'm not out here Spitting game bro It's just the same old Idiot you get on these guys podcast is just on a dating show Yeah I throw When I'm talking to a girl in a dating show, I don't ask her normal questions.

I'm like, what do you think about like Brett Farvin in 2003? You know what I mean? Bro, don't spoil it, but if we get some of that on the show, that would be all time. So who's your favorite jerseys in the NFC? Do you think it's okay that the Eagles have a black alternate uniform? That's what I got to know. That's what I got to know. NFC, more like no fucking chance.

That would be a pretty fire like cutaway for a girl. That would definitely make it. Yeah, I'd be like, oh my God, I'm in love with her. She would definitely get screen time on that with a cutaway shot if she put that one together. And then, yeah, you honestly would fall in love with her. Cuts to me. Both in Cowboys jerseys. Akeman.

God dang it, dude, Troy Ikeman. Yeah, he does a nice job. All he ever says. It doesn't a nice job. Doesn't matter, bro. Too hot. Too hot. Yeah, you're like, okay.

There's just some of those quarterbacks. It's so obvious. They had their first marriage from like their high school or college sweetheart, got in a career, got divorced, got even hotter. And now have a white. for a girlfriend that's probably 18 to 22 years younger than them. You're like, you're more ripped now, Troy Aikman,

than you were when you were the quarterback of the Cowboys. QB Club. Like, how does that work? Those NFL quarterbacks, the back halves of their lives are just fantasy, bro. They look great. I don't know how they do it. Their hair looks better now than they did when they were 18 years old.

Money. money is how they did it. That helps. Drew Bloodso. See that guy lately? Dude Drew Bloodso owns like a winery. The things I do just to be Drew Bloodsoe for one minute. God dang.

One minute. One minute of Drew Bloodso. I'm in. Dude, Hey, if you could be Drew Bletzo for one minute, what would you do for that one minute? Uh, I'd call Colin Cowher to make fun of them

because they're like best friends. Oh, are they? Yeah. Oh, sick. So, like, you just got his number and everything. Just hit him up randomly. I think I just, I'd just go in the backyard.

I'd be like, just for a minute, dude. Without a ball, just from, the neighbor's like, what the, what is going on? I'm like, dude, I got to be Drew Bledsoe for a minute. They're like, oh, okay. All right.

Dude, the name Drew Bledsoe. Dude, Bledso? I mean, that is absolutely made up in a movie quarterback name right. S-O-E at the end? He's number 11, right? Yeah. Like, you know, Drew Bledso, he's not, you know, he's not ringing you up at the local Kia store. No, Drew Bledsoe is either going to be a major league baseball pitcher or quarterback.

Bledsoe. Probably has the option to do both. Guarantee if you look up Drew Blets out, it's like, he got drafted number 18th overall by the Montreal Expos. And he's like, oh, yeah, well, you know. Where do you go to college? I love this game. That's a good one, bro. Oh, no, I know where he went.

I want to see if you can guess. I don't know, man. I get him in Elvis Gerbach kind of confused. Ooh, I'll give you a hint. It's something that you make fun of me about for a college game day. Oh, he went to Washington State. Dude, I got love for Washington State, bro. I like him a lot.

That flag, though. Still pisses me off how you're like, dude, no one knows. I'm like, they talk about it every fucking week on the show. To this day, bro, nobody knows about that Washington State. Oh, my God. Yes, they do every week. And the 267 consecutive appearance for old Cribson. They come back with it.

Couges, baby. I love that flag. Not so fast. Not so fast. Yeah, dude, that happens every single week. Not March Madness in it, though, huh? I haven't watched one game, dude. Actually, I went into a bar.

After the Iowa show, there's like a bar next to my hotel. By the way, everything in Des Moines, Iowa closes at 7.30 p.m. went to the bar and I was like Is your guys kitchen still up in there? No, we're just doing drinks But it was like mayhem in there And I was like oh this would be fun to watch a game in Just like one of those oh it's great dude

But I watched like two seconds of a I don't know I don't even know who's playing Then I dipped But that's all the marshmallow I got bro I've been seeing like stuff on the internet though I mean I'm like So you're the most just like

Yeah I mean I just follow it that way pretty much I'm like I'm not going to miss you know anything if I'm on Twitter yeah when's the last time you watched something what was the coolest thing you watched live ooh that's a good question for the comments

what's clubhouse what's the coolest thing you watched live ever yeah like I mean obviously I didn't see that dude from Oakland hit all those threes live but like I know it happened I know he's like a dog but yeah what's something like in the moment you're like, oh, I actually saw that happen. I guess it could be like Pacer's Pistons brawl. Yeah, that's a huge one. And everybody always, everyone, if you ask anybody,

everyone in the world was watching that live. Why was that? Why was it? That is so true. Everybody was watching that live. That's absolute bullshit. They had no way in hell. It was a Friday night. It was like almost 11 o'clock when that was going down. Like, you did that. Everybody's watching that live. I think we did because I think it was after a wrong collie game. It was like, it was like semi-state. It was in November. I remember coming home and I had practice or at a game the next day.

So I was just like, all right, let's just watch the pay. The Pacers are playing the Pistons like on TV TV. On ESPN. On ESPN. On ESPN. I'm watching that, bro.

Yeah. That was a good one live. You know what one really? Like some of these things that happen where you're, they're horrible, but you're like, damn, I kind of like, because it's one of those situations where you know, you know you were like witnessing history, right?

Kind of wish I would have been older for the OJ Chase. Oh, that is insane. I kind of forgot, I forgot that even happened. The way everybody talks about that and how it literally like the entire country was shut down also happened on a Friday. And everybody was just like watching it, no matter where you were at the fucking bank,

at the pizza shop, anywhere you were, it was just on and everybody was just stopping and watching it. Can your oil change? What the, yeah. That's insane. Okay, yeah, that is one. That's a good one.

Dude, I never saw Mark McGuire. Of course, I bring up Mark McGuire. I never saw, I only saw him hit home runs, like on top 10 ESPN. Never saw one live? No. And then, like, one day I was just, like, at my grandparents and they always had baseball on,

and I was like, fuck it. I'll just, like, sit on this couch. and like kind of watch this game. And Mark McGuire's up to bat. And I was like, all right, big dog. Like, let's see it. Cranked one. Cranked one.

I was like, oh, oh, that's when I became a fan. I was like, that dude is so real for that. Dude, did you ever see Sammy Sosa slam one? No, only on the replays. I never watched baseball. Oh, dude. When Sammy would get into one and he would do that hop. Bro, the hop.

The hop was it. that guy like for as far back as I can remember until like 10 or 11 year old me whenever he stopped playing for the Cubs that was when I saw the hop you were jumping off the couch dude did you oh

was the hop only when he hit home runs or was it every time he hit no only home runs oh did it ever backfire like did he ever like it hit the wall and the hop kind of fucked him up yeah or like you know he he felt like he got it right but then maybe

at Wrigley, like the wind was so crazy or something to where it's like, it would have been out but it got caught up in the jet stream just enough that like right before the wall it died and the guy would catch it. Every now and then. It wasn't like, it was probably, you know, when he did it, you're like,

this is gone. 90% home run rate on the hop. Yeah, yeah. I remember wanting to do that so badly when I was a little kid. I was going to ask, did you incorporate the hop? No. Because it was, I think even my dad at the time, he was just like, that's Sammy's thing man like do you're like come up with your own thing

that's a great dad dude I was like yeah that's true but god dang that I want to just fucking knock one out and then just it would have happened if it was if it it would have been destiny bro you would have just done it

natural yeah the hardest pictures ever is like Sammy when he has just absolutely clobbered one like 500 feet and he just knows it and the photographer would catch him in like mid air and his peak pop and the whole crowd behind him

is just like going crazy that was all time dude all time a hot dog and a Coke your kid your kids midair because you're like if I'm

this was happening now and Frank was there hell yeah you'd be fucking I'm tossing him in the air Sammy's doesn't catch his Frank the catcher's like yeah dude when the catchers take the

That makes it even harder. That makes it even harder is when like the catcher's kind of like standing up behind. Like they get a little bit of the catcher and you know the catcher just like, I told you not to leave that one over the plate. Hit your spots. The catchers, bro. Catchers got to be the craziest position in all sports. Doesn't look anything like anyone else.

All the fuck. Yeah. The gear. Diving in the crowd and shit. I'm like, bro, what is going on with you? Their glove. How fucked up. glove is compared to everybody else's.

When people said there are catchers, like they played baseball. I was like, oh, what position would be like catcher? I'd be like, ugh. Like,

is that like line, is that like the center of a baseball team? Yeah, you know, you don't want to, yeah, you don't want to mess with the catcher. Because the catcher probably also,

like, more than the likelihood than not would wrestle in the winter. So you're just like, oh, fuck. It just makes so much sense when someone's a catcher. I'm like,

yeah, okay, yeah. Why don't I ask? You got catcher, catcher energy. The catcher was a wrestler. The center fielder was a wide receiver. It just makes sense.

Yeah, it just makes sense. Quarterback is either a shortstop, pitcher, or first baseman. QBs and pitchers, same guy. The shooting guard, too. Oh, yeah. The quarterback, that's also the pitcher just knocks down threes. He doesn't drive. He's just always in the corner.

How about when you would find out that like these dudes who are the number one overall pick like out of high school or like John Elway, they're like, yeah, like Big Ben. They're like, yeah, he's a quarterback for his high school football team. He was also the cleanup hitter and the pitcher on his baseball team and the starting point guard for his basketball team. Average 36 points a game. I'm like, are you God? I know. I cannot. I'm like, that has to be fake.

like spread it around a little bit. He had to be trash, right? No, he hit 46 home runs his senior year. Could have been the first overall picking baseball too. Decided he didn't want to play basketball. I'm like, he decided? The colleges decided what the hell I was doing. He decided, okay, wow, okay.

Like that level of athlete is just so fucking beyond insane to me. I can't even wrap my head around it. I'm like, how are you that? good and at everything? Shut up. Yeah. 36 points against the hometown rival. I'm like, what?

You would think that if they're like the All-American quarterback who's like got all these letters that like, you know, they probably played basketball. Maybe they're just like a glue guy. You know, they're just a hell of an athlete. They're not really a refined basketball player, but they're on the team. Yeah. And they contribute. Nope.

40 points a game. Best player on the team. Doesn't touch. a basketball until literally after after Thanksgiving when they just one state. Yep, just one state next day. Hey, we got practice at 8 a.m. And hey, you're gonna put up 36 on 5.7.3s.

Winning sprints, winning suicides and all that? Yeah. Like, bro, you're not sore from the state championship last night? Picks up a baseball bat like March 1st for the first time since last summer. Hits it 420 feet. Does the hop. I swear, man. Can't tell if we're jealous.

I 100% I'm, and it's almost not even jealousy. It's just, I just don't understand. It's so fascinating to me. Amazing. Amazing, right.

It's like, it's like fucking LeBron. It's like, we're just witnesses. Like, I'm just witnessing something insane. Huh. You know,

and we all hope that our kid will be that. And they probably won't. I'm going to, I found out, found out today that I'm going to opening day. Wrigley. Oh, that's fire. Next week. So any of the, any of the Shytown Clubhouse, any of the north side, any of the cubby blue wearing clubhouse, if you're going to be out and about there, hopefully, see you around. Opening day.

I went to opening day. I went to Cardinals opening day when I was in eighth grade. It was fun. Nice. Was Big Mac still around? No. Wait. I don't think.

No, no, no, no, no, no. Reds, opening day. Not Cardinals. Yeah. Was that like absolutely nobody on that team. I was like, about to get some nachos, though.

Hey, did they have the, the vest jerseys? They did. All right. Okay. I can get down with the Cincinnati Reds vest jersey. I can. I love a vest jersey. The Rockies? They still have them. They still rock them. That's sick. Yeah. Pirates used to have them.

Oh, the pirates have the best color scheme. Red, yellow, black, gray, white. Bro, when they throw the red in there? Bro, that, so many good colors. I'm like, you can't have red and yellow, dog. And black? Fuck off. Crazy. How's that allowed? Rockies are up there too.

Blue Jays, I like them. Yeah, the purple, gray and black of the Rockies is just pure. It is. It's so Rockies. Makes me want to drink a beer. I'm like, what the hell am I doing? Makes you want to go skiing. I hate skiing.

Rockies are playing tonight. Damn, I kind of want to go. go skiing. Why am I looking at this lodge in the mountains now? Who's the good player for the Rockies? Todd Hilton. No, no, no. Was there another one?

I must be thinking of somebody else. Matt Holliday. I'm always just thinking of Jeff Bagwell for some reason. Who do he play for? Astros. Oh. Jeff Bagwell, unsung hero, bro. He was just in every home run derby.

competition. I was like, I like that guy, but he's not going to win. Hey, his legs got too tired because his stance. He was too, he was too wide. I'm like, there's no way. And he started burning. Jeff Bagwell, bro, just like, always goatee spitting something. Always had like 19 home runs. I was like, he's in it. Then Big Mac would just put up 27. I'd be like, God damn it. I used to get so scared whenever Bagwell would come up against the Cubs, dude. He's rocking him, dog. go. This guy's putting it 400 feet out of left center at Wrigley.

He's nasty. I want a Bagwell jersey. That would go hard, man. The Astros have such a, like, variety of jerseys. They've had so many that, like, you could pick something different and cool because it's been such an array, you know? Uh-huh. Yeah, Bagwell, dude.

God, he scared the shit out of me, man. I never thought we'd talk about baseball for 19 minutes. but. Hey, Jeff Bagwell is to baseball what Drew Bledsoe is to football. Perfect. I got another one. I got another one.

I got another one. Yeah. This is the clubhouse question. This could be. Alan Iverson is to basketball what Steve Smith is to football. Okay. Uh?

I think that, I think it's got to be a quarter. No, I like it. I mean, they're both, you know, they're both like pretty hard. knows, like, did it their own way, very kind of provocative. I get it. But I just feel like

AI just undersized. AIs. Right. He had the ball in his hands and he was in control. You know, Steve Smith, he had to wait for fucking Jake Delhombe to find him. You know what I mean? Right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right. Same vibe. Same vibe. Same vibe. Yeah. But I, I just think that the AI, it's got to be a, it's got to be, it's got to be, got to be, got to be QB. Hey, Alan Iverson, another guy could have fucking gone pro in the NFL. Oh, I, dude, that's, that's the one that hurts. Oh, he was the number one quarterback in his class. Dual threat before it was even a thing. Didn't feel like playing. Hey, Charlie Ward. Oh, now we're talking. One the Heisman. I,

I feel like going to the NBA. Shut the hell up, bro. The fact that you can get out of here, bro. Get out of here. Shut the hell up. Yeah. It's either that. I swear, there's no in between.

It's either those kind of dudes or a dude who's like, this guy was a no-star recruit. He thought about quitting his second year in college that he walked on at this community college. All of a sudden he's, you know, fucking. Bin Zobrist. Like he's a World Series MVP. It's either one or the other.

There's no just like, hey, this guy was always a really, really good athlete. And, you know, he was a really, really good baseball player.

And he stuck with that. And he made it through college and had a really solid career. That's either like, you are the best fucking player to ever live in your area that you grew up. Yeah.

Or you're like this gritty guy who just wouldn't give up on the dream and then you make it. It's insane. It is one or the other. I don't know one guy. I can't name one person that was just good in me. It's kind of boring, actually.

That's probably why we only know about those two different ones because the one that's just like, yeah, he just. Tim, you know, all state football player, you know, scholarship to Purdue, you know, played three years there, holds a record of like, you know, most receptions or something. And then went on to have like a seven-year NFL career. and now he sells real estate. It's like, who's getting behind that?

The jobs NFL guys have after they retire or crazy. I'm like, do you need a job, bro? Will you just chill out and drink some coffee? Like, just shut up. I know, it kind of makes me sad a little bit. I'm like, you're selling real estate? Huh? It's got to be such a weird transition.

You know? Like, I've seen some dudes who, like, one guy who used to play for the Steelers, You just got into like a like a dog, like, like kennel business or something. I don't know. I don't know. Maybe it's, maybe it's his passion, you know? Right.

But he's just like, you were just taking handoffs on third and two like on the road. And in the wild card game. Yeah, like a must have situation. And now I don't know. I don't know how they do it. Maybe it's just what do you like. He likes kennels, bro.

I think if I was an NFL guy, my job, I would just start. I would just. I'd work at a donut shop. Oh. They'd be like, that's sad. I'm like, no,

this is my actual dream. So we would do exactly what we've talked about for a long time of just, we'd essentially just make the clubhouse, like the bar, the bar and grill, the clubhouse. That's it. Yep.

Get to that. Works for me. Works for me. Yeah, we double screened it this, this weekend. Rye was in on it It's the best

At these big moments like this Like when it's like the NFL playoffs March Madness You get you get the lady involved too She starts putting in some bets And you know winning every now and then Nothing better. Yeah here we go

Dual screen Getting snacks Oh yeah Who'd you who you pick it Who'd you have babe Who'd you have in this one babe Those words come out of your mouth Who'd you pick babe

Can you remember She knows you're like, you're paying attention. Yeah, when you get your girl to drop, yeah, I had Clemson going on the Sweet 16. Whoa. I love you. Like for one, so you get it?

You're walking on eggshells that whole time, though, because you're like, if I do one wrong thing, she's so out, you know? Yeah. She's right back to not caring about anything that I like anymore. I have to walk a fine line of like, talking about the games in a way that's like inclusive but not like condescending.

You know? It's tough. What do you think about their coach? I think he looks like an asshole. Okay, we're still in. We're still in. We're still in. We had a classic yesterday.

We actually, we were watching the Clemson game and this kid missed two free throws that would have tied the game with like 25. seconds left. And so then they ended up losing and the kid is like pulling the jersey over his head and like, you know, and Rye's like, oh no, I hate when they cry. I hate when they cry. And I was like, I let a beep go.

And I was like, should have hit his free throws. How'd that go over? I mean, she thought it was funny because the team that she picked won. Okay, good. Yeah, it was a little. icy. You know, it was a little risky, I think, for me. Yeah. It was it late in the day. Yeah.

Yeah, you can't bust that one out on the early game. So, yeah. That's a 7.30 gamble. Shit is free throws. Yeah, I mean, pretty simple. You know, you become like the most analytical, like cutthroat dude ever. Oh, that is fun when, uh, you and your girl are watching a game. or at a game.

And she like kind of doesn't know what's going on. She treats you like you invented the sport. You know? She's like, so why are they punting here? I'm like, well, I've been waiting for you to ask me this for my entire life. So let me tell you. Oh my God. They didn't get the first down.

What happens now? I'm like, hmm. Yeah. Why'd they run? there. Start getting into defensive defenses and shit. See,

cover two. Hey, start doing this. Uh-huh. Why are there so many guys backed up on the field? It's because there's like not a lot of time left. So if they score, they're,

they're in trouble. So they back up all their guys. They're fast guys. But why is there like that one super tall one back there? Well, just because it's going to be like a Hail Mary. So he's like there to bat it away, you know?

Bat it away. It's a long story. Hey, hey, you start getting real crazy with it. And she's like, why does everybody look at, why's everybody in the defense looks so small?

You're like, well, it's because they're in nickel. What's that? Well, if you really want to know, I played nickel in high school. So in a passing situation,

they'd bring me in. And that's what number 22 is doing right now. He's me. pretty much. Essentially. Essentially, I could have been him, but I chose to date you, so. Number 23, is he good? Yeah, I mean, he's like a pretty solid dime defender.

Dime. Yeah, it's, so in these situations, you know, you want to have more people to cover the past, the threat of the past, so you bring out more defensive backs. He's kind of like hot. He's not on the field. all the time, but like when they bring in like sub packages, sub packages,

and what? There's like different pat. It's a long story. Just keep saying long story because you don't know exactly. I'll explain it to you when we get home. Oh, keep going. Then something happens, you know? Just basically that meme of the dude with the backwards hat, like with his arm around the girl at the game. So, so, so good. Every time I see that meme, I'm like, that's been me 14 times. It's so relatable. And the girl's like, I'm a big, I've always been a big, like, you're, you can't, you can't go to a football game with a girl unless you're literally married or on the, like, or you're going to

marry this girl. Football, football game dates do not work for me. Oh, I had a bad one. It's, there's so many things that just can go wrong. and make the experience miserable and both of you miserable. You got to be like literally either she knows she's getting proposed to. You're engaged or like you're married and it's a, hey, we're in this like no matter what. I know that now.

So no matter what happens here, she's with me, you know? Oh man, that's crazy. That is not good. You think every time a girl goes to a pro game, there's like a 25%? chance she's going to get proposed to. Do you think that girls think that? We're going to the game tonight. Like you think she's like, what if he?

I don't have my nails done. Shit, I better wear these boots. The football game. Better wear these boots just in case. That's why they're so mad during the games because they're not getting proposed to. That's why, bro. I figured it out. I'll just think about it, man.

It's just like you, you know, because you're in the spot typically. And again. a lot of female football fans. My sister and my mom included. Let's get it out there. Members of the clubhouse who are females. I'm sure they're huge football fans. I know they are.

But, you know, other 75% or 70% or whatever it is when it's like a guy and a girl, it's like, had so much fun game day with my person. And you're like, yeah, but like he was pissed that you had to go to the special spot that you like to take the photo

and then you're mad at him because you're like, it's just a game we can see what's happening and like then it's a come on come on two different two different things going on what are you talking at the game you're having good conversation at the game and then you all of a sudden you're you're you're a weird guy because you get super pissed you know what we got going for for oh my god I like didn't know that it was that serious I mean I told you that like I have a tattoo of them like I love, you know.

Yeah, but like at a game, like, you know, yelling. No, yeah, you're definitely in the extreme. You're like an extreme, like, it's like when we went to the game together. Right. You can't casual, like you can't casual date at a fucking NFL game. Nah. That's insane. Especially when it's a team you don't, you like, you know.

Like if you're going to a game and it's like two teams you don't care about, you can, you can take a girl with you and be like what is but when does that happen when are you going to an NFL game that you're like oh we're just in towns we're going to go check out the lions and the bingles dude I do that every time I go to an NFL game I'm like I don't really give a shit but I'm just here because I had like good tickets well you are one of the also other end of the spectrum freaks so we're coming both into the spectrum here

that's why would me and you go to a game together it's like what is going on bro But I start like, I start like absorbing you. And I'm like, yeah, fuck that. What was it at the Steelers Colts game that I said? And you were like, dude, chill, dude, chill. Come on. Oh, I don't know. Ooh, was there a moment like that?

Maybe it was like the punters. Yeah, it was like something. I think Steve Sims, like he, I don't know, was field position or. I was like, dude. Oh, so. something happened. I was like, dude, I think he can hear you. It's the first quarter.

I was like, dude, he can literally hear you. He probably follows you on Twitter. I wouldn't. Dude. But, yeah, baseball games, perfect. Baseball games are perfect sports date. Even if you like the team. Yeah. Perfect sports date. Yeah. What are you going to do? It's nice weather. It's outside. It's slow.

You can talk. Baseball teams know, too. You know what? Let's do fireworks at the end. Yes. Let's put that big old ice cream soft serve in the helmet. Dollar beers? Anybody? Hey, hey.

Hey, bring your dog day. Just in case you got a girlfriend too. Baseball games are invented for bringing girls to them. 100%. Yeah. Hey, let's sit in the outfield. On the hill with a blanket. Yeah.

Maybe bring our own snacks. I don't know. A picnic? Come on. We know what you're doing baseball. The built-in seventh inning stretch, the built-in where you have to put your arm around her. Get a little tired. Everybody else is doing it.

So it's like, yeah. Then she's like, oh, wait a second. And then maybe she gets the arm around you there. You kind of back grab, you know, your arms around her. but then your other arm is like you're holding hands a little bit. Oh, wow. Wow. Wow, dude, I'm about to cry.

Hey, you know what? We've been sitting here for a while. Let's take a walk around the park. Holy hell. Take a couple of pictures with the mascot. Hey, see how hard you can throw this ball. Let's have a little fun competition. They got festival games going on.

Oh, I guess I'm at the St. Jude Fest all of a sudden. Let me brush off. the old arm. Hey, you know what? Let me win you that stuffed animal. All the while, that's been like one inning. So you're like, oh, yeah, cool. Oh, we put up a two spot.

Great. They're all cheering. What happened? Well, let me explain it to you. Then he becomes baseball the night. What's a web jam? Oh, dude. Oh, hey, here we go.

The numbers of the positions. and how they keep score. Oh, 4-6-3 double-play. What's that? Dude, 4-6-3 double-play. When they said that on ESPN, I'd be doing something, 4-6-3 double-play.

Got to check it out. I was like, I don't know what that means, but that's the hardest thing I've ever heard Scott Van Pelt say. 4-6-3 double-play web gems. I was like, that's killing some time. You know, there's so many conversation pieces.

That's killing some time. You know? They got music there? Like, while the game's going on? Oh, yeah. In Oregon? Dan, da, da, da, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. What if we caught a ball? I don't know. Let's try. Do you, like, bring your glove? I mean, not usually. You had it in the back of your car,

but you decided you didn't want to be a dork? it's tucked in the back of your jeans at that moment you flip your shirt out to cover it you're like no I don't even have a baseball glove 14 rolling around your trunk all broken in so like what if I wanted to play catch

I mean we could see if there's one in my car so like if it got hit out here to us would you just what would you catch it with like your hand I mean yeah like I've you know Well, my senior year this one time. I've done it before. That is nasty, dude. When a shortstop bare hands won, I'm like, dude, you are God.

Yep. Oh, but if they miss it, ooh, uh-oh. Bad look. Javi Baez did that in the fucking world series. Missed it? I don't know. I'm kind of like, I'd give them props for going for it. You're not giving them props in that situation, bro.

Oh, really? Was it like, was it like a major? I'm pretty positive. It was game seven. I would have gone with the glove. Yeah.

Yeah. Exactly. But at the time, it was, you're right. It's like, I'm pretty sure John Smoltz literally said like,

that's the give and take with a player like Baez, you know, he makes some wow moments, but he makes some moments to make you scratch your head. And I'm like, fucking shut up.

Scratch my head, dude. I don't want to fucking chop my head off. This is what a This is a Detroit man Smolsey I just become Paul Allen Smoltsy got too real dude Duh do

Smoltsy Dude I'm so excited it's back I mean I know we joke about it all the time but there's just something so nice and smooth about tossing on a baseball game at night at night. The class,

there's just the like the of the crowd, you know. Mm-hmm. Just pure. Pure. It's great. Outside,

it's like good weather. You're like, yeah, yeah. And like sometimes, dude, remember like early espresso days? We'd be like trying to write a video at like 3 p.m.

and the Cubs would play at like 4.30. Oh, yeah. I'd be like, yes. Day games. Yeah, dude. Friday's 120. that's that's that's why Wrigley's the best every time I see a baseball game on TV I'm like we should get ice cream

come back same inning you're like this is perfect another date night situation let's get ice cream after the game all right you guys want to let's hit the clubhouse let's get the club let's get the club let's get the clubby club club club club this is from somebody you said don't use my name and the subject

title so we won't do that but how do you react after your lady friend peas the bed after a night out drinking do you go the supportive route or make fun of her spread my mantis and garnish me with ketchup mustard and relish this is a great one

this is what do you do wrap myself in the pea bling it and never get out um I think it all just comes down to the length and the strength of the relationship, bro. I'd rather have that happen like day one. And like it depends on their sense of humor. You can't, this can't be date number six.

You guys had a wild night out at a party or something. You crashed together. First time spending the night. You both are super hammered, whatever, and you wake up and it's that. You got to, I think you got to have a little, you got to have a little soft spot. You got to, hey, man, no worry. It's just probably me. It could have been me.

I mean, I was just as drunk. Oh, I would definitely take that hit. Yeah, even if you were in your head, you're like, what the fuck? Like, you know. Whole backstory. Oh, God, I've been peeing the bed my whole life just to make her feel good. Right, right. That's the way.

But I'm like, you know, if you've been together long enough where you feel, kind of, absolutely, drop her with some shit. You pissed on my bed. Oh, that's. You could hang that over her head forever, bro. That's super like, yeah, but you pissed my bed that one time. Bro, nothing's beaten that. You got the P-card.

And you could use that in a situation to get out of situations, you know? If you're out with her friends and you're just like, you're kind of a designated driver for the night. You know, and you're kind of too much. Right. You're kind of itching to leave, you know? And she's like, I want to stay. Please, we just stay. And then that's where you're just like, yeah, remember, remember a last.

time when that happened? Your friends are like, what happened? You're like, she'll tell you. You're such a dick. You did it. You peed on me. I'm gonna go put some R. Kelly on now. Or like knowing guys, guys would be like,

man, I really put it down last night, didn't I? Oh. Oh, man. And then the girls got to play along with that. Like, yeah, you did. actually I just pissed myself because I was so blacked out drunk because I had to come on with you.

Oh, okay. Oh, anyway. This is over. Yeah, I mean, definitely both sides there. Early on, have a little cushion, you know, put the hand on the shoulder. Later on, dangle it over the head. I think you make, I think you fire jokes immediately.

Just to, I mean, you just got, if she, is she, I've never seen a girl be like sad about something like that. Usually girls are pretty like... Yeah, I just get super embarrassed, you know? I mean, I would, if I did that and I would be like, holy shit, I'm so sorry. I'm not a child. I would be pretty devastated.

I don't know what I'd do. I'd hell of blame it on her. Their wedding vows. Tommy, little did I know when I pissed myself all over your bed on the first night that we spent the night that I be standing here on the soldier with you today. Like, wow, I did that. Or you blame it on the dog. You can blame everything on dogs.

I think that's half the reason people have dogs. Do you fart? Yeah, if you got a big stupid dog, you're just like, yeah. Speaking of Tommy from Tommy to church people, Ben and Joey, loved hearing that bit about the stereotypical people at Mass.

Made me think of a few you guys would relate to. One, my dad referred to this lady in our church's choir as the, quote, cowardly lion, because she sang obnoxiously like the cowardly lion from the Wizard of Oz. Two, went to Catholic school in Texas, and early in the school year, it'd still be 100 degrees outside, and kids would pass out left and right at Wednesday Mass every single week. You just hear a loud thump somewhere around the church, and everyone would look around trying to see who it was. Slept my ass and take me to mass wearing an Antoine Randallel, a jersey with the Super Bowl XL patch. You get it.

good. Hey, Steelers, Steelers white jerseys better than the black ones. I don't think we've ever talked about this. Some fond memories for sure and they are like clean, but. And it's the yellow name on the back. That's crazy. I do. I like where I like personally wearing a white Steelers jersey than a black one.

But I like when they're wearing, but I like when they're wearing the blacks more than the whites. White, I don't know what it is about that. It's the yellow last, yeah. right. Because if I could throw on a pair of black jeans and a white Steelers jersey, outfit of the decade. That's right. Yeah, you can, you can pull a lot, Tommy, from the, the choir, a bunch of characters in there. You ever been passout guy at church? No, I've always been

terrified of it. Like, any time I start to, like, if my stomach starts to feel, you know, I haven't had breakfast or, like, if I start to kind of feel like light head, I'm just like, oh, God, I can't be pass-out guy. I don't want to be pass-out guy. Freak me out, man. I hated it. And it was always real loud. I know everybody in church is quiet, but it seemed like the pass-out guy would just drill his head on the pew. I'd be like, damn. Or you see some commotion, like they were trying to catch him all of a sudden. Like, what's going on there? Oh, he passed out. Weird teacher. Art teacher. They got to get him. They got to get him on. English teacher. Yeah, we passed out because all that weird fucking perfume you're wearing, Mrs. Schmidt.

No shit, dude. But like part of me when somebody passed out in church, I kind of thought it was like the devil too. I was like, oh. Is he possessed or did he just not eat breakfast? They caught me like halfway through one time. They're like, your lips are pretty white. Do you want to go to the office?

Like in church. I was like, fuck yeah. Let's get you some apple juice. Let's get you some apple juice. Sat in the little nurses room in the office. on a Wednesday school church day. I was like, this is, this is living right here. You got any combos back there?

Right. Having some crackers and apple juice or like applesauce. Fuck yeah. Dude, I wish, I just thought about this. I wish that because there's always that commotion, you know, whenever somebody passes out at mass, I wish that we had like the little like Fox injury music to play us out. Like the piano player, the organ player would give us a little taste in sea or something

just to, you know, mellow everybody out. little bit. Yeah, like he's fine. He's fine. We just can't talk about it right now. Yeah, we'll be back after this. We're going to play it. Play him out. Play him out. The priest like, like goes to the peace part real quick. So everybody's happy and forgets about it. Peace me with so peace me with you and peace me with everyone right after somebody passes out. Oh, yeah. They're stepping over the kid, the piece. Doesn't matter anymore. the kid passed out on the ground. Drag this little bitch to the...

Drag this bitch to the anthrax or the whatever. That was it, Anthrax. Anthrax. Jesus. No wonder he passed out. Drag him to the anthrax. We got peace to do. This from Dave says sports nicknames. Good morning, burpee boys. Joey, I hope you enjoyed Myrtle Beach. I just moved to Charleston from Pennsylvania last April.

And everyone in Chucktown likes calling Myrtle Charleston's little slutty sister city. Chuck Town. Oh. Anyway, I feel like on the show you guys are always talking about the names of ambiguous early 2000s and 90s pro athletes. But what about the nicknames? A few of the favorites are Gary Payton's The Glove, Cordell Stewart Slash, Edron James, The Edge, and Anthony Thomas A-Train. What are some of y'all's favorite nicknames growing up? Love your guys' show.

Good luck with the comedy shows and slap my ass while saying, Lord be with you. And I'll slap your ass back reciting and also with you. Oh, that's so fire. with your spirit. That's so good. Favorite nicknames? Pudge. Pudge is tough.

Slash is hard to beat. Big poppy. I mean... Man, that's good. Like, that's just his name. He's no longer David Ortiz. He's just big poppy. I feel like when someone says David Ortiz,

I'm like, why don't you just call him... Why don't you just do the thing? Yeah. What we all say. I don't know about Giannis. Gionis. Like, I've never, I've never called them. Greek freak?

Yeah. Yeah, I think I'm pretty sure he kind of like came out against that. I don't think he likes that. Oh, really? Maybe. Nike's whole marketing campaign. I could be lying, but I feel like I saw or, I mean, prime time. Ooh.

Dude. And now it's just prime. Oh, God. I love, dude, it just gets shorter and shorter. Prime. I like the ones like, you know, it's not like, I don't know, but I mean, Alex Rodriguez just being a rod. It's good.

Yeah. There's so many, man. See, like Derek Jeter was the captain, but like that like was his nickname, but it wasn't, you know? It's like the sheriff kind of for pay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Like one guy kind of called him that and then it just took on a life of its own in a way. Pudge, man. That's a great call right there. Fire. Because it's just like, it's unique. I'm trying to think of another one. Joker for Yokic is pretty good, I guess. I love ones from like when they're a kid, you know?

And like maybe they have like a giant head or something. Or like, and then all of a sudden, like their name's like Brian, but they go by like fatty. Love that. And that's just their name. Oh, yeah. Like that is like, Dan, that got passed on the ESPN like, lower third. It's just fatty Faddy Fitzgerald.

Like is that really his first day? I got cleared by ESPN so it must be. That's the shit I love. I absolutely like, dude, I think, I don't know if I've told you about this. But so my great aunt, her son

had a son and his name is Daniel. But my great aunt, she calls him Gator. Nice And I asked her one time I was like What was he really into Gators

When he was growing up Or like what And she just said No I walked in there And first time I saw him I said that's my Gator And His name's his Gator

Well his name's Daniel But like she calls him Gator Everybody calls him Gator And I was like That dude is gonna be playing Offensive Guard for Kentucky And it's gonna be sick

What's the last name? Wilson Oh, Gator G will Gator Wilson That's a top five prospect I was like man

Aunt Markey Good on you For looking out For your grandson That's sick Gator Wilson Any others Before we move on here

I can't think Right now man That's all right This is from Mike He just sends Quote Preferred walk on A Toledo

Best player ever Holds every record in the state You run the 40 Run the 40 against him beats you by a literal whole second Preferred walk on that total That's it

You're like he can't get a scholarship offer to Eastern Michigan at least I mean anybody Anybody Bowling greens Not coming just to say Hey check them out Illinois State

passed. They got a better guy from Illinois. What? This guy, he grew seven inches last year. That's the dude that you like reference to your parents when you're like, I think I'm done playing.

Why? If Fatty Frazier can't get a fucking scholarship offer, what am I doing? He's 6'7. Runs a 4-2. He's 6-7 in return. turns punts. What am I doing?

And Bowling Green doesn't want him. Like, who's going to want me, Dad? He can do a backflip. He's 6-7. He turned nine punts last year. And he can't even get a preferred walk on to Indiana.

State. He's from here. Come on. That's so true. All right. That's good. Team these guys at gmail.com. Love,

love hearing from the clubhouse. every week. You guys are the best. Yeah, all of our tickets are on our websites and our bios. If you're in or around those cities, come out, get your tickies. Let's have some fun. Let's talk Brad Farrv. Let's talk Antonio Freeman. Let's let's just talk. The best part about having shows out of town is like after taking pictures with people and they say something like, bro. Like this, this girl came up to me in Des Mo. was like, I'm on green and we just took a picture and I was like, that was the best, that made my whole life. Hey, I'm on green on the podcast. Took a pick. Boom. Perfect.

That's the best part. When the clubhouse comes out and they just like say some cool shit. Oh, it's the best. It's a clubhouse. Clubhouse handbook. It's a clubhouse guide. We got it. They know. They know better than we do. Hartford, April 18th, Omaha May 1st, Syracuse, May 30th, watch Lovers and Liars on the CW. April 11th. Cool. It premieres.

Buffalo and Detroit, 17th and 24th, April. I'm there. So yeah, get all this tickets. Benedictpolice.com, official joey millanero.com. You already follow us, I'm sure.

But yeah, keeps in the show to some homies. Keep sending a show to family, your dad who loves Brett Fav, your mom who thinks Ben's hot. I mean, whoever, whatever it is, send it and we'll keep expanding. We'll keep going. So, appreciate you guys. And all right, we'll talk to you. Donald Dr. Bishop.

Plain Bishop.