Think AI Podcast - The 5 F's of a Legendary Life | Ep. 10 with Coach Kevin (We Live Legend)

Episode Date: May 27, 2026

🎙️ The 5F's of a Legendary Life | Coach KevinCoach Kevin has coached more than 40,000 people across five continents, from everyday entrepreneurs to heirs and billionaires. In this episode he tells Dave Goyal what almost every single one of them got wrong about success, why his first three billionaire clients were suicidal, and how to build KPIs for the parts of your life that actually matter: your marriage, your kids, your fitness, your faith.We get into the Five Facets framework (Fitness, Faith, Family, Finance, Fun), why a grind season is fine but a "season" without an end date is just laziness, the teenager KPI that will rewire how you parent, and a brutally honest take on what AI is doing to entrepreneurs right now (spoiler: it lets you overclock until you melt).In this episode:00:47 The two truths almost no one will tell themselves03:16 Why coaching billionaires taught Kevin that money is not enough10:32 The Five Facets framework: Fitness, Faith, Family, Finance, Fun14:29 Deferring joy is the same as deferring profit19:25 How to set real KPIs for marriage, faith, and family31:30 Grind seasons are fine. Seasons with no end date are not.38:18 The KPI every father needs to be tracking44:36 The teenager hack: crossroads and giving them the radio53:46 AI is the tractor of the mind (and why it will melt you)59:04 The constraint you didn't choose but should be grateful for1:05:20 Love yourself warts and allIf this episode gave you a new lens, hit subscribe, drop a comment with the one KPI you're going to start tracking this week, and send it to the entrepreneur in your life who needs to hear it.---🔗 Links & ResourcesCoach Kevin: https://itscoachkevin.comGrow Without Sacrifice: https://growwithoutsacrifice.com/#ThinkAIPodcast #CoachKevin #Mindset #Entrepreneurship #LiveLegend

You don't know what you want, you already have it. And if you don't know where you want to go, you're already there. Welcome to the Think AI podcast. Each week, we talk about the most exciting AI research, tools, case studies and more. I'm your host, Dave Goir, and I've been working behind the scene in data and AI for over 30 years. Whether you are an AI expert, skeptic, or something in between, this podcast is for you. Today's guest is someone who thinks about success very differently than most people you will hear from. Coach Kevin, he's a mindset coach, entrepreneur and speaker.

And what he calls a coach of coaches, he's the founder and CEO of Vee Levin'Leg Legend. He has worked with more than 40,000 people across five continents. Wow. From everyday entrepreneurs to hears and billionaires. And his whole message pushes back to the shortcut culture of modern success. His tagline is there is a legend in every life. Are you living yours? This is the conversation we're going to have with him today.

Kevin, welcome to the show. Thank you for having me. I'm so happy to be here. Great. So let's get started. You have coached more than 40,000 people, and I'm still trying to sink that in. From everyday entrepreneur to hears and billionaires,

what is the one thing almost all of them got wrong about success? So there's a lot of things. But if I had to say that all of them got wrong and then eventually got right, is being able to tell the truth about who they really are and then being able to tell the truth about what they really want. And those are two separate skills, right? But really say, where am I really? Who am I really? And I think somewhat we have a culture that celebrates everything.

I was laughing the other day that I think by the time my kids graduate from high school, they'll have graduated like seven times. They graduate from kindergarten. They graduated from sixth grade and everything has gotten as good. I think my generation, we didn't celebrate enough. I will freely admit that maybe we were a little too hard on ourselves. But I think we've gotten so celebratory that people are pretending they've climbed Mount Everest when really they just walked up a hill behind their house.

And that will mess you up. You're not going to be able to be really successful because to be successful, you've got to live in the real world where you produce real results. And so I think the number one thing, people get wrong. Actually, I think most people are actually better at telling the truth about where they are to themselves, but they actually don't even let themselves say, well, here's what I really want to be. There's so many people, and that's why I say live legend. Legend is a big word. It's not a little word. I'm not saying live your purpose. I'm not saying live what you should do. I'm saying live legend.

Like, there is legend in your life. Like, if you're listening to this, there is legend in your life. And you say, well, can there be eight billion legends? Yes, the thing is, not everybody chooses to do it. Very few people will actually live out that legend. There's so many people who know they could write a book, who know they could sing on stage, who know they could, but they know they could, but they never will, right? Knowledge does not translate to action. Like action is action. And so, yeah, I just think, be honest about where you are and be honest about where you really want to go. And when you do that, life gets measurably better very, very quickly. Very true. And I love what you just said.

One of the follow-up question I was thinking while you were saying that, you know, I think what evolves from this is money does not solve all the problem. Is that true? What you believe are? Money doesn't solve all the problems, but boy, it solves a lot of them, right? So money is this kind of neutral thing that can really just amplify who you are. And so if you really know who you are and you really know what you want, money will be an accelerant. I mean, it will really accelerate you. And it can remove some roadblocks, right? You can just pay people. I don't, I need a website. I don't know how to build a website.

I just pay someone to do it. Then I don't, then I don't have to learn how to do it, right? So it, but the thing is the problem with a lot of money, and I see this lots, like when you, when you coach billionaires and you realize many of them are suicidal, it's like that doesn't make any sense. Like, according to, you know, wait, they made it, right? But not all of life is money, right? If you don't know where you really want to go, money can accelerate you the wrong direction,

right? So you see this with like lottery winners who end up broke again in 10 years. Well, they didn't know where they wanted to go. Like, if you're going 300 miles an hour of the wrong direction, that's not good. You better hope you have enough fuel to get back, right, to zero. I think a lot of people are making great time. And then you say, well, where are you going? And they have no idea, but they're getting there really fast.

So true, so true. And I love your analogy on the fuel side because I also believe money is the fuel. So you can't just take it out of the equation and say, hey, not what. working for money. Yes, you are. But the main thing is money will not get you that happiness, will not get you to the level of satisfaction and family life that you would want. Rather, if you are only chasing for that, it will rather take you to more disrespect, more worry, more pain and things like that, right? Yeah, money, money is so neutral. I mean, money is a lot like technology. Money will amplify. Money will speed,

along and fuel, but it, it'll take you wherever you want to go. It's, is it not, it's not everything, but boy, it sure is hard to not have it. It tells someone who doesn't have money that it's not everything. So I don't want to be one of these guys who's like, oh, you know, I got super rich and super famous so that I could tell everyone it was never about the money from my Buccati, you know, and my giant mansion. And, you know, the truth is like, to a certain point, money matters a lot because it's what offers us security and it's what allows us to create. And I, I see, people all the time in the coaching world. They're like, oh, I don't do it for money.

I just do it for the purpose. And I'm like, great. But without money, how far is your purpose really going to go? Not very. Like, I mean, it takes money to broadcast. It takes money to reach people. It takes money to put on things that actually change people's lives. That's not bad.

That's life, right? Like, it's, if you want to, the greatest lesson I've ever learned about money, Dave, is watching a show on TV called Alone. If you go to Netflix, there's a show. And it's, these guys are like by themselves in the woods, in the Arctic Circle for up to a hundred days. And it's crazy because there's no money involved at all. They just get dropped off and they have to find food. And then they have to keep their food.

And then they have to do that every day to stay alive. And watching that show, man, I realized, wow, it's just like money. You have to figure out how to make it. And then you have to figure out how to keep it. And then you have to figure out how to do that over and over effectively. And if you can't do that, your life is. going to have trouble because money has become a placeholder for farming or hunting or gathering, right? It's just money's how we hunt and gather now. Money is how we build shelter now. So,

so all of the old world, I need to find a cave, I need to protect it, I need to find food to bring into my cave. Now money takes the place of that, but the truth is all the fundamental stuff hasn't changed. As soon as someone on that show has food, guess what, predators come to take it? So they have to figure out how to keep it. And if they can keep it, it, then they have to figure out how to go find more because eventually they'll run out. So, you know, money is so important. It's money matters a lot. It's just not the only thing that matters. Yeah. And what you just mentioned, I read a book recently, one of my friends mentioned it, the stoic mindset. I forgot the exact name of the book. And that talks about it, right? People now

talk about having the ice, you know, in the morning and put it on their face or take an ice shower or a bar that it was all about living with that minimal mentality so that you can find and do what you want to do and serve the purpose and mission of the life that you have defined more than anybody else. And, you know, I have a parallel story to tell. I ran nine businesses, disabled entrepreneur, five of them, I call miserable failures. Every business made money. So it was about the money.

But I still classify that as failures as the KPI. it and it was more about the learnings than the success and the wins that I did. And I'm very proud of that. If somebody tell me, okay, if you live another life and get just one business, I said, no, I want to do that all over again because I learned a lot through that experience. Well, I mean, I think in life, I am someone who likes to win. I want to win in life. I mean, I know there's people who say there's no winning.

I think there is winning. But to me, it's win or learn. It's not win or lose. I lose when I quit. I lose when I stop, right? I stop. Businesses can run out of money three times in a week, but businesses don't end. They don't fail until the owner gives up.

When the owner says, okay, no more, okay, that's the failure, right? But for me, it's win or learn. Hey, am I winning or am I learning? Am I winning or am I learning? And I've watched this with my son, if you will indulge a proud father. my son was the worst kid on the worst team in his little league. He had never played baseball before. He didn't even know how to stand up to bat.

Like he did it wrong. He stood on the plate with the bat in front of him because I'm a terrible dad and didn't teach him how to bat before the tryouts. And in one season, they were the worst team. They lost. They only won one game out of like 12 games. They got to the tournament and they figured it out. They just learned from every loss. And by the time they got to the tournament, they beat a team.

And then they had to play the number one team. And so we all thought, well, hey, at least they had one win. And then they beat the number one team. And then they last night won the championship. And I saw my son, who didn't even know how to stand in the batters box, hit three hits, bring in three runs and steal a base in the championship game. Wow. And they weren't the worst team anymore. And he wasn't the worst player anymore.

Why? Because they learned from all that failure. You know, they learned from it. And it's the same in life. It's the same in marriage. It's the same in business. It's the same in our bodies. Hey, we're going to make mistakes.

Of course, we're going to make mistakes for human. But if we learn from them, that makes us better. If we don't, well, you know, that makes us egomaniacs. Very true. Very true. And you just mentioned failures. And that connects me to the, you know, five facets, but intended that you talk about, which also has five apps in it.

And failure is not one of them. Can you talk about that? Yeah, absolutely. So when you look at life, one of the things, one of the mistakes I think people make when they look at life is they look at it through just one lens, my life. Right. Well, that's fine, but it's very generic. And if you look at life generically, you'll get very generic results. Right.

So I like to look at life through five facets, right, which is fitness, faith, family, finance, and fun. I'm going to say fun because I just am a person who loves fun and I'm a person who loves enjoying life. So fitness, what does that mean? It means your ability to output, right? So, yes, your fitness. What output can you do with your body? Also, it's input. Like, hey, what are the things you're eating?

Right? What is the quality of the input of your life? And then what is your kind of chemical, physical health? Like, what's going on inside, right? What's happening inside of you medically? So that's physical faith. Now, faith is your relationship with the unseen, your relationship with the divine, right? admitting that there's something there bigger than you.

What is your relationship with the divine externally? What is your relationship with yourself? Can you sit alone in the dark, you know, with no one around and like yourself and have it, you know, be comfortable? And then number three, what is your purpose? Like, why are you here? What are you chasing, right? What are you pushing?

What are you chasing? If we go to family, family is, yes, the family you were born to. All of us were born. All of us had a mother and father. That family, yes. But also the family that we're creating. Maybe we're married. Maybe we're not.

Maybe we're just dating. And then third, the family that you choose, right, which is the people you choose to hang out with. So many of us say, blood is thicker than water. Not realizing that that colloquialism, that statement has been completely reversed. The original quote was, the blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb, meaning that the people that we choose to run with, the people who are locked in lockstep with us on our mission that we choose to be with, actually have a stronger bond with us than just the people we happen to be born to,

the community we happen to fall into, right? And so when we talk about family, we're also talking about the family that you choose. Then finances and finances are, hey, it's just what I said. Can I make money? Can I keep money? And can I keep doing that over and over? Can I repeat that?

Make it, keep it, repeat it. Right. And then fun, for me, is just enjoy me. Are you enjoying life? Are you getting joy? Because I would say if you've optimized your life for fitness, faith, family, and finance, and you don't like your life, then you haven't actually optimized anything. What is the point?

Like, we are here to have joy. My dad's favorite quote in the whole world was that Adam Feld, that men might be and men are that they might have joy. And my dad loved that quote. I must have heard it 10,000 times in my life. And I wholeheartedly agree that, man, if you cannot find joy in this life, what are you doing? I love that quotes.

My dad passed away in 2017. I loved him like anything. And one other things he used to say, there's another day. No matter what you do today, there will be another day. So don't panic, don't freak out on the day, which is happening today.

There will be a new day tomorrow. Just live the life. and just enjoy. That actually prompts me to a good question. You know, most people avoid the fun facet, you know, especially the entrepreneurs. You know, if you see a lot of coaches, it's probably outwork for 70 hours, you know, you have to do these kind of things, you know, make your life better now so that you can retire early and do things later.

And I somehow don't relate to that logic. I'm sorry. fun like you mentioned, needs to be part of your life. So why most people defend skipping the fun? So it's really interesting because you mentioned the Stoics, right? And Seneca was one of my favorite Stoics, who was actually quite rich. He absolutely needed nothing, but he was actually quite rich. He was quite good at creating wealth, right?

Here's the thing, because life lasts an undetermined amount of time. we don't know Dave like today could be our day or we could live another 20 years you know I'm I'm I'm 50 now so when I I don't tend to think of it as long as I did when I was 20 when I was 20 I was going to live forever when I'm 50 I'll take 30 years right but because we don't know the day of our death it makes us feel like we will live forever if I told you hey Dave you got 10 years man that's it 10 years like like May 20th 20 27 you're out like that's the end you would live your life in a very different way than not knowing when that is. The fact that we don't know when death is will give us the illusion that it is never coming. This is a bad idea, right? This is where this is where none of us would take our entire life savings, put it in our arm, right, walk around and every person we saw it throw money at. Just here you go, here you go, here you go. But with our time, we do that all the time. We do that all the time. We waste it. We waste it. We just give it away, give it away, give it away, right? Now, what does this have to do with fun? Because that's true,

the entrepreneurial class, we know, oh, man, time is precious, right? Everybody's trying to defend their time. If you're any success at all in business, the first thing you realize is there's not enough of you. You need employees. You need systems. You need guardrails around your time. And that makes us very successful for a short period of time. Okay, maybe your first million a year. Maybe your first two million. Like there's a certain amount of money, there's a certain amount of, you know, annual recurring revenue that you can just brute force, right? But once you get towards two million, man, you, you are not going to be able to brute force that anymore. What the entrepreneur learns early is that just grinding in and working hard can overcome a lot of stupidity.

We all kind of start dumb. I mean, we just do. There's, there's lessons you have to learn as an entrepreneur that there's no other way to learn them. You know, you, you learn what a profit is by by making the price too low. You know, you, you learn what, you know, project creep is by having that one client who just pushes one little project so big and you're like, wait a second, how did this happen, right? You just have to learn those lessons. So you learn early on, if I just grind through, I get success. The problem is, the problem is later we keep that same mentality. That mentality was great when when we were small and we were just starting out. Cool. That's okay to grind. I mean, it's all right to grind in. At some point, though, you've got to enjoy your life.

At some point, the purpose of the business is to make money. Money for what? Yeah. And if you don't have the answer to that, you can have just like many of my clients. Like I said, my first three billionaire clients were all suicidal, which makes no sense at all. Right. And in the thinking of most people, But the reason is, man, I made it. I think when you have a billion dollars, right, you know that, okay, I'm a success. But I don't like my family and my kids don't know who I am. And I'm not sure why I'm even here. And, you know, like, I mean, it's those questions are still there.

So I just think, like, having joy is not something you want to defer. Like, just like you don't want to defer profits. What business would say, okay, I'll make no profit for 20 years and then I'll make 100% profit in the 21st year? That's crazy, but so is also deferring all of your joy to a future that may not even exist. And this is where the whole thing comes back around is like you're pushing off joy with your family or with yourself or, you know, it's like life is a dance and you're like, well, I'm going to do all the dancing at the end. No, no, no, it's happening right now. Like the dance along the way. You may not have tomorrow much less 20 years from now.

And you see this happening more and more where people have deferred to 65 and then they die. 63. And the thing is it's all useless then, yeah? You know, one of the thing you mentioned about success, and I know we had a initial call, and I love talking about KPI, so hold that thought

why success is, what is the, let me say differently. So how would you measure success as a KPI, which is more qualitative than quantitative. So we're going to talk about it. But one thing I also wanted to touch base with. So how do you really

have high performers look at the weak facets, right? So funding one, there could be others. And you are converting them into a high performer. What are those traits, all the things that you see in them and tell them to improve upon? And how do they really acknowledge and improve upon it? Sure. So think about this in terms of a destination. Why is business, right, easy? A lot of entrepreneurs will tell you, well, business, it's just easy. It just makes sense. But then when I get home, it doesn't make sense. It's not as simple, right? But the reason is business is a very finite aim. I'm going to make money. And then I pick how I'm going to make money. So maybe I'm doing an AI agency or maybe I'm selling, you know, bricks. So I want to make money. I'm selling bricks.

Okay, well, how do I sell this brick that cost me a dollar for $10 so that I can make money? It's not that it's simple or easy. It's that we have a very definite aim. We know where we're going, right? And what happens in the rest of our life and relationships and our spirituality and our purpose. And we don't set a definite aim. We don't know necessarily where we're going. And so we say, well, that's hard. But it's not hard. We just have to set the KPO.

We just have to say, well, this is what I want. Right? Like, hey, what is the idea? If you're married and maybe you're not completely satisfied with your marriage, have you ever sat down? And I mean, spend 10, 15 minutes and say, the. ideal marriage for me is this. Not, not what's the best marriage I can get with the wife that I have, not, not what I think my husband will do as a, no, what is the ideal marriage? If, if money was no object and you were a leprechaun who could give yourself your own wishes, what would be the ideal

marriage? And very few people have ever thought about this. They just think, well, I get what I get. Well, no, no, no, no, no. Where do you want to go? This is what we do in business, right? Entrepreneurs are like, Oh, I want to make a millionaire. I want to make 10 million or it starts with money. We end up with a target and we have a product or a vehicle that we use to create that. Same thing in a relationship. Just no one takes the time to say, well, what is the success? Where am I going?

Once I know where I'm going, I can get there. I'm a coach, right? What is a coach? It's a horse drawn carriage. It's a way to get somewhere, right? It's, I pick you up here and I drop you off over there. Now, in life coaching, you're the passenger and the horse, right? because I'm just helping God along the way.

You do all the work. You set all the targets. But if we don't know where we're going, then you're already there. Like that's the most important thing I can say to anyone who's listening. If you don't know what you want, you already have it. And if you don't know where you want to go, you're already there. Right. Now, by default, but do you really want to live a life by default or do you want to start

going somewhere on purpose? And what you'll find is KPI are super simple. What do I want? I want a relationship that's on fire. with my son. I want my son to respect me as someone he should listen to and to love me as someone who can have fun with. Right. Okay, cool. I know that. So what am I going to have to do? A certain number of things on his terms and a certain number of things on my terms. So I'm going to spend at least 20 minutes a day with him. And I'm going to make sure that three times a week, I just do

whatever he wants. And then I'm going to make sure that three times a week, we're going to do what I want, something structured that I want to teach him as his mentor. And then I write that down. Great. And now I start tracking it. And what does that sound like? Like any other KPI in the universe. And then once a week, I review, hey, is this working? Is it too much time? Is it not enough? That I like what I did this week. The same thing you would do at your business. It's not that business is magic and KPI's exist in business. It's that no one puts the energy or attention onto the KPI's in their life. True. So true. And that prompts me to another.

contrast, you say balance is a myth and that everything balance eventually falls over and what you can actually have is harmony. So, you know, the proposition about harmony, then balance. Walk me through what harmony looks like in practice for someone who feels pulled in five different directions at once. And most of us get into that. Oh, yeah. Totally.

Here's the thing. Balance is mostly a lot. And you don't even want it, honestly. You don't even want it. I mean, people will tend to say, well, I have work and have family and then, you know, I have physical fitness. Do you want to do thirds of each, you know, like is it eight hours of each? No, I mean, that's ridiculous.

Like balance is kind of a myth. Harmony, though, you can have that. And the way that I would have you think about that is what song are you singing with your life? What song are you singing? And is that song being heard? Is that the song? And when you start to realize that life is a dance and life.

Life is a song and are you singing? You know what? Your favorite song? Whatever? I want you to think right now about your favorite song. And then I want you to think about listening to it on times two. And then listening to it on times five speed. Did that song get better?

No, it's horrible. Like the song has a rhythm. The song has a syncopation and a movement. Right. That is what life is. Life is a song. It's the harmony. What song am I saying?

Hey, there are parts of a song where there's no. sound. It's a pause. And then there are parts of a song where there's a crescendo. So there are moments of my life from very, when I decided to be a coach, I had to get very, very lopsided. It is a hard thing to get into and do well. It is a hard, even harder thing to support yourself on. And although at the very top levels, there's these guys making it huge, the bottom is rough. I mean, you're doing a lot of things for not a lot of money. Sometimes you're paying to be able to coach to be able to break in. And I remember telling my family, I had found this really great thing to do in California. We lived in Louisiana. And I realized in order to pull this off,

like this transition from the marketing company to coaching, I was going to be out of town 11 out of 12 weeks. And I sat my family down and I said, hey, here's the thing. In order for dad to be who he knows he needs to be and in order to make this transition, you are not going to see me much. And I have four kids of my wife and I just was very honest. This next season, this next quarter, I am almost not going to be at home. I'm essentially going to live in another state and almost not know what's going on with your life because here's why. And here are the things and here. But at the end of that, our whole family is going to move out to California, which we ended up doing living in Laguna Beach. We're going to have this whole new life. Things are

going to be based around coaching instead of marketing. And here's what I think is awesome about it. Good. Was I balanced during those 11 weeks of five out, five day a week, 20 hour a day? events? Not at all. There was no balance, but I got very imbalanced to be able to create a new reality that then I decided what is the next act, what is the next song? Where so many of us are thinking that the finish line is the point and the finish line of life is death. That is not the point. The point is what note am I playing right now? What, hey, maybe right now needs to be more of a rest. Maybe right now needs to be a lot more fun. Maybe right now I need to be very spiritual. I need to pull back. But, you know, I just don't think that trying to take your life and saying,

well, you know, I want everything to be balanced. It's a myth. There isn't. Nothing interesting is balanced. I mean, first off, nothing interesting has perfect balance. I mean, there's a balance to it, but it also takes you somewhere. Hey, where are you going? What song are you singing? And are you in harmony with that song? If you, if your goal is to be a professional rugby player, you're not going to have a very balanced life. That is a very elite group of guys. You're going to be working out a ton. Now, when you get it, sure, you can

play a new song. But, you know, be honest with yourself. Yeah, everything has a cost to pay. And, you know, I love the music analogy here. I write, sing, and compose music. And song is not balanced, like you said. It has loud

parts and quiet parts, like you said, and even pauses. And that's what makes it work. A good song. have all three, like you said before. So this is great to our listeners to hear that don't look for a balance, really look for a harmony in everything that you do. Yeah, and sing a melody. And every now and then go on a little run. And, you know, it's, that is real. Like right now, one of my targets is to learn how to dance. And I'm the worst dancer. My wife, I love dancing. I love the concept of it. I just, I'm not very good.

it naturally, but I want that because it will remind me about my life. Hey, you know, if you miss a beat, like you miss a beat dancing, the song doesn't stop. It doesn't ruin the whole song to miss step. Just get back to it and get in and our failures are not the end of the song and oh my gosh, everything is terrible. Our failures are missteps. Oh, yeah, okay, that was off. Let me try. Let me do something different. And when you start to see life that way, life can be very fun. You can have a lot of joy, even in the face of failure, even in the face of hard work. That is really good. And, you know, relating to dance, my son loves dancing. So I'm into music. So when he was, he's 15 now, when he was two or three years old, I kept buying different instruments,

hoping that he could start playing with me. But then he got more towards listening to the songs and then dancing. And he danced like nobody is watching. It doesn't care whether it's in a beat or He doesn't even bother if you are a lot. And then people seem to enjoy because he has so much energy and so much reflection in what he does with the happiness. Everyone seems to enjoy it. Rather than being a perfectionist here, he's more of a fun-loving person.

And, you know, that takes me to a different question altogether, which is, you told me a grind season is fine. Going 80 hours a week is fine. You just gave an example about that for a quarter for your move towards California or Los Angeles. But as long as you can tell me when it ends, that would be great. And if you cannot name the end, then it's not a season, correct? How do you help someone tell the difference between a real season?

And then the life has quietly become 70 hours a week forever. It did for me. And that's why I'm asking that question. A hundred percent. And when you said, my businesses made money, but they were horrible failures, I do exactly what you're talking. I've been in those two where I just felt like a whipped slave. only I was the master at the same time and I couldn't understand how to get out.

Like, I just, okay, there's money, but I hate everything else about this. Man, first, perfection is really a lie, right?

Perfection is not real. You know, it's, so when we start to compare ourselves with perfection, we have a real hard time because that is, that's imaginary. It's not real. Like, perfection is a lie.

If you want to be perfect, just lie. That's it. Just lie. If you want to be excellent, great, then start taking movements forward. Okay. Excellence is achievable, but perfection is a lie. Just like the horizon. The horizon is not real. Okay. It's just not real. That is, that place doesn't exist. Where does the air touch the land? Everywhere. Where does the sky touch the, the ocean? Everywhere. Your mind manufactures a line. Why? So you can orient yourself. So you can get around. So you can see your environment and move. Perfection is the same way. It's something that helps you to orient. It's something that helps you to find your way. And so remember though, you'll never get there.

Just like the horizon. Every step you take towards the horizon, the horizon moves back, one step. You'll never actually touch the horizon. It's not a real place. You'll never actually touch perfection either. And I think in these endeavors as we move forward, is so important to remember that. Like that perfection is an orientation. It's something to help us navigate where we want to go.

It isn't a thing in and of itself. Yeah. Yeah. And would you be able to name the end of the season? Like, how would you recognize if it's the end of the season and not leaving that life? I got so excited talking about perfection. I totally missed your question, Dave. Thank you for, thank you for kindly pitching the softball back to. He's saying, no, this is the ball. It's all good? No, so you do need seasons, right? Like I said, like a grind season, you really do need a season because there are, if you think about, look at all of human civilization, right? the eight, almost eight billion people that we have on the earth, that's from recognizing the pattern of the seasons, right? There's a time to plant. There's a time to grow. There's a time to harvest and there's a time to just survive.

Right. So you have, you know, really built in here's spring, summer, fall, winter. Understanding those seasons has allowed incredible progress in civilization. I mean, we are the most comfortable people on the planet by far, right? I live in the United States. I am the top 1% of 1% of 1% of people who've ever lived, ever, including all the kings who came before me, right? But because why? Because we understood the four seasons and how to leverage them to create bounty in food at least, right? We've moved from people who didn't have enough to eat to really have people who almost have too much to eat, depending on where you are. I know there are places this hasn't caught up yet. But generally, we have done this because we understand seasons.

as an entrepreneur, as someone who's moving forward in their life, understand seasons too. Hey, maybe I have a heavy grind season. But remember, seasons end. Spring gives way to summer. Summer gives way to fall. Fall will give way to winter whether you're ready or not. And so when I see somebody saying, okay, I'm working 100 hours a week,

which they all say, but it's very rarely true because that's really, if you've actually done 100 hours a week, that's insanity. It's very difficult to keep that up, okay? But they'll say that. great. Okay, awesome. You're working 100 hours a week. So for how long? When do we find relief and when do we break to the next season? And if you have a puzzled look, then you're not living in a season. That has just become your new reality. And that is not what we want. And there is no season that can stay. You can't stay in constant harvest. You can't stay in constant planting. You can't stay in

constant growing and you can't stay in constant survival. One constant across life is everything changes. Everything ends and everything changes, period. Like those are constants. Everything ends and everything changes. So can you have a season of rest? Sure. But let me know when that's over and I'll tell you if it's a season or not. If you don't know when it's going to end,

then maybe you're just being lazy, man. Like if I, you know, when I set up that season for my, for, you know, becoming a full-time coach, it was a 12-week cycle. At the end of that 12 weeks, now we all live in the same town. Now this is different. Now we take a deep breath. and we reassess and decide what the next season is, right?

That season might be a year. That season might be, you know, 90 days. But I will tell you, your body is very attuned to quarters. Quarterly living, right, is something that really works because agriculturally we've been doing it for generation after generation after generation. It's not that somebody invented that on a spreadsheet, you know, in an office somewhere. That comes from planting in the spring, growing in the summer, and tending, right, while it's growing, you're tending, getting rid of,

pests, et cetera, harvesting in the fall and then surviving on that harvest in the winter. Beautifully put. And one thing popped, what you just mentioned, a lot of people think that grinding of 70 hours are. This is what I've seen. I build a program called Grow Without Sacrifice and most sole entrepreneurs are grinding 70 hours a week. More is probably a lie or they don't know what they are doing. So like you said, but they think that this is the price of admission to be an entrepreneur, especially a solo. And I think we both agree. It's not.

Grinding is not the cost of the ticket for the admission to be an entrepreneur. It's something going wrong, so you need to have self-understanding of who you are, what you are. Maybe you're not built for entrepreneurship and maybe you build for something else. But not grinding. That's not the solution. Would you agree? Well, if you think about the word grinding, it means something went wrong. Gears shouldn't grind.

They can, right? But that's not the constant state of gears that they blow up. And I find myself, first off, if you're an entrepreneur, at least if you're a good one, you just love the work. I just love to work. I'm a workhorse. Like, whatever I get into, I just love to work. I don't mind it. Like, it isn't heavy for me to do work, right?

I like work. I like heavy work. I got a lesson, though, from Teddy Roosevelt. Teddy Roosevelt said the greatest joy in life is far in a way doing hard work worth doing. Now, I grew up in a seafood family as eighth generation oyster men. Oistering is hard and it's cheap. Like oysters don't cost much. Even today, they're not even like, they're like 25 cents apiece, right?

So you work hard, you lift heavy things and has very low value in and of each one of them. Right. So I learned hard work. What I didn't learn, so I thank you, Father, for teaching me hard work. What I had to learn on my own, and I don't resent you, but I wish you could. could have taught me was hard work worth doing. And so we have to evaluate as entrepreneurs. Hey, is this hard work or is this hard work worth doing? People will say, well, if you work hard, you'll, you'll reach your goals. No, no, no. If you work hard at things worth doing, yes, you'll reach

your goals, right? But guess what? Family is worth doing. Health is worth doing. Spiritual connection is worth doing. Building a community of people who matter around you is worth doing. And they all build the business too, especially if you're a solo entrepreneur founder, you are the business. You are the limiting factor. So if your spirituality is stunted or your physicality is stunted or your, your relationships are stunted, the business is going to stop. Look at solo entrepreneurs and they get divorced. Go look at the numbers in their business. It doesn't go well. Why? Because they are the business. Like they are the heart of the business. If the heart is sick, the body will suffer, period. So, I mean, I just think, yeah, it's so important to keep that in mind.

So you just mentioned about the numbers, and that takes us to the next thing that you talked about, and we just waited on it, which is you tell people how to build KPIs. It's not just for the business, but for every part of life, even spirituality. I want to learn more on that part, by the way, even family. Give you a real example of a KPI, you have helped someone set in a non-business. part of life and what actually change when they started tracking it maybe you know faith or spirituality man this is such a good one um i'll i'll tell you two things one is a system that i put in place with lots of people a system that hold you accountable to what matters for people while letting you keep your own center of what actually matters because you know you and i we have the same needs right

we have we have the same pieces of our life but our bodies are very different and our our relationships are very different. Our backgrounds, our cultures are very different, right? Even if we live next door, we're very different. And so any kind of KPI you set has to be able to hit the major points of human existence while allowing each person to do the thing that works for them. Right. I'm six foot three, almost 300 pounds. You know, I'm going to have a different kind of fitness than someone who's five foot to 115 pounds. It's not right or wrong. It just is. Like I need to lift heavier. I I lived heavier things. They're probably going to be faster and nimbler.

That's not wrong or right. It's just we're different. If I look at one that I've set with a lot of fathers, a lot of fathers in the modern world have become ATMs. They just become a cash machine because they want to produce, and the male psyche and the male biology is results, right? Results make me worthy of community. The female psyche, the female biology is community produces results.

But for men, testosterone-based beings, when I produce a result, then I'm worthy of community, right? Men never call each other and they're like, hey, let's get together on Thursday. And then you hang up. You're like, yeah, great. And then you hang up because we never said, the first thing, if I tell you, let's get together on Thursday, that you're going to tell me, what are we going to do? And then I'm going to give you some result we're going to create. Oh, we're going to play football or we're going to watch this or we're going to play,

we're going to do a jazz set. We're just going to jam, right? Like, whatever. results. Men are driven the results and then you come into this modern world. What is the result that matters the most to give you security and everything else? Well, we don't need to secure caves. We don't need to go hunt our food. We need money. Money has become the placeholder for that. And so many men have become ATMs and they forget that there's so much more to life. And so one of the KPIs I'll set with them is how many, how much time did you spend with your children?

and how much of that time was unstructured that the child was in charge. So how many minutes each day? And for those of you thinking it, because so many people are like, yeah, I'm going to spend two hours a day with my kids. First off, they probably don't want that much time unless they're infants. You're overshooting. But so many dads, I'm going to do two hours a day. I'm like, that's not going to work for a couple reasons. first, no, you're not. Second, they don't want it. But yeah, how many minutes are you spending? And you can do this per kid, like, depending on how granular you want to get. You can do this for your, I'll show you one for relationships in a second. How many minutes per kid did I spend either each day or either each week? And then how many of those minutes were unstructured or they were in charge, meaning like we're just playing whatever game they want to play, whether I like it or not, right? Those numbers will tell you a story about your relationship with your children.

like for let's say that you're married right or you have a committed romantic relationship how often are you going on date night right what makes date night different from another day everyone says well how do you know if you're on a date did you change did you change your clothes if you changed your clothes it could be a date not everything you change your clothes for is a date but definitely if you're on a date you change your clothes so that's kind of my definition did we go somewhere where we needed to change our clothes whatever that means okay but hey how many dates have I gone on this week and how many dates, right, have I gone on this month and how many dates have I gone on this year? You start tracking that. And I track that all the time and you start

seeing these correlations. Like, wow, if we miss two dates, two dates, like if we go two weeks without dating, things don't work out the same. You know, this could be how many times are we having sex? If you're in a, if this is your committed partner or whatever, hey, I'll tell you what. If we go five days without sex, weird stuff starts to happen in our relationship. We're suddenly very contankers. We're suddenly fight a little more, right? If we go 10 days, I feel like it's been eight months, you know, we get really resentful. So those are just, those are just numbers, right?

They just tell a story, but so few of us are actually looking at those numbers. This is so bag on. And, you know, I can relate to this a whole lot. So I love my son, you know, he born after 10 years of our marriage. So there's a lot of extra affection he got. And we both are disabled parents. and so there's a different way to bring him up. And that's the day I chose to do a lot of different businesses,

which I can do it mostly from home, so I can spend more time with him. And then he started growing up. So I set up a matrix like he said, right, one hour per day. It worked out up until he was like eight or ten years old. It was three or four hours a day. So I was overshooting it already. But then now he's a teenager.

And that 15 minute is a difficult thing. So you now need to reinvent because of that KPI. Like what can you do? So he loves playing chess. He loves watching movies. I'm not into game so much. So that's one overlap I could not have. But I started maximizing my time.

I'm still able to make one hour a day with him in most days, unless he is really freaking out. And then you have to leave him alone. But yeah, I mean, having a KPI, it doesn't really matter whether you're meeting it or not. But then you know where you want to shoot for. and if you don't shoot it, it's okay, you make a piece with it, but you at least measuring it like, okay, I want to put my effort to do that. And I put my work around his schedule.

I pick him up every day. I make sure that I don't have calls during that time and so on and so forth. Same thing goes with a spouse or your partner you're living with. I think there's a saying that if both of you, both of them can sit together in a quiet stillness, I think they met that thing because now they don't have to say anything to each other. They are comforting each other by even watching TV together and not saying anything. And I love that kind of connection also. What do you say?

Yeah, so like here's another KPI, right? With teenagers especially, the game really changes. Like all of a sudden minutes become pretty precious. I always tell my clients who have kids under 12, it's like, hey, enjoy this time because there's going to be a day. They just don't want to be around you anymore. And it's not bad. It's good.

They're trying to find out how to be adults. And you can't be an adult if mom and dad are there. So they're trying to figure their way into adulthood. But like with the teenagers, a great KPI is crossroads. You only have these minutes. Like, hey, am I picking them up? Like you said, picking him up from school. That's awesome because that's a crossroad.

And like 19 times out of 20 that you pick him up at school, it's the same boring thing. He slouches in the chair. He doesn't pay attention to you. He doesn't really want to talk. you know but then that 20th time he's there and for whatever reason he opens up right for whatever reason he talks and that is so important so for me with my teenagers i always count crossroads hey how many times am i there if they need me i don't know when they're going to need me because that's the hard part right quality time is driven by quantity time the the amount of quantity you have

will can drive quality without quantity there is no quality right i mean it's not like you can just see your kid one time and then that's a lifetime where the quality is that's silly Right. So yeah, those kind of KPIs really, really matter. And I just feel led to share this. It has nothing to do with what we're talking about, but I'm going to share anyway if you can indulge me. If you have a teenager and you want to connect with them, these crossroad moments, when you get in the car, give them the radio. This is something I did early on because I realized something that the music we listen to are the emotions we like, right? That music brings us an emotion. So what is the music we want to hear? We want to hear the music that gives us the emotion that we're enjoying in that period, period of life. My dad always liked this, like, classic rock and then his mom died, and all of a sudden, he loved country.

I'll never forget, like, his music taste just changed, like, immediately. Well, I was like, what's going on? You know, and the reason is the emotions that he was feeling changed dramatically. And so there was his music. Teenagers, let him run the radio. And here's the thing. If you one time say, that's crap, that's horrible. you are in big trouble because they are not going to hear you say that song is crap they're going to hear you say that emotion is crap

because to them that song is that emotion that they're feeling so what i learned let them play whatever they want okay and then say why do you like that what is it about this that you like and watch out because they think they're talking about the song and you're going to know more about your teenager's life than you've ever heard before I have five kids, four of them are out of the house. So one of them is 11. He's the little leaguer. The other four, the number of conversations we've had about music they like is unbelievable. And it gave me insight into who they were.

And because they're running the radio, guess what happens when one of my kids gets depressed? All of a sudden, the songs on the radio start getting really like down. You're like, oh, wow, like, hey, what's going on? It didn't used to be like this. We used to have some kind of more up-tempo stuff. like what's going on in life right now? And it's a beautiful way to kind of stay in touch. As long as you don't criticize, be so careful.

If you, and this is not just for teenagers, this is anyone. If you make fun of or denigrate the music someone loves, they will feel that as if you're saying the feelings they have are invalid. It may not be what you're saying, but be careful because that's how they'll take it. Yeah, no, I totally can relate with that. I have his playlist. I take him to different shows, just the other day we went to Charlie Putts shows in here in Anahm Center, Honta Center,

Anahm. And I have his playlist so that he listens to it. So what happened because he knows that I'm listening to his song. He's already listening to my songs, especially in these songs. And I went to a show last week, and he wanted to come with me, even though he cannot relate anything with that. And that gives me a lot of joy because now since I'm in his, life, he's into my life as well. And that's amazing. I mean, that's the KPI I didn't even think of,

like how he can provide time to me rather than I can provide time to him. So that's great. I want to switch gears. We had a AI podcast. I'm a pretty passionate entrepreneur doing AI since 1996, but it's not just about AI, right? It's about AI is merely a tool, a conduit to, you know, get where you want to get to. I think you and I both have. build or are building AI-driven business systems. And you told me you love AI more than anything. But then the whole message challenges shortcut culture, which you just mentioned. And I'm giving you that opportunity. There is that line between AI as a tool that gives your life back, which is what I'm also doing for me and for my people who are getting coached by me.

AI is a shortcut that robs you of the life actually you want it. Is it that or is it something else? So depends on who you are, right? Never before, I think it was Bill Gates who said that technology amplifies efficiency or inefficiency. So if you have an inefficient system, technology will amplify that inefficiency to the point that your business grinds, right? If you have an efficient system, technology will amplify it to the point that you just really are just printing money. AI takes that to a whole new level, a whole new level, right? What is AI? Here, let me take off of AI and let me get to.

you to your own mind for a second and then we'll come back to AI here's the fun part you can already become a slave to your own mind most people are just reacting to whatever's happening around them they're not really living on purpose they're not really setting up their day they're not really being proactive right and so they're just reacting to whatever happens and so if you have a mind that is reactive you will tend to feel like a victim you will believe that your life is the is caused by everything around you right and so you'll have this victim mentality and as an entrepreneur it's dangerous because that's when you start losing money, that's when you start doing things that are way out of line. If you think that you are a force of nature, that you

have a will to exert, and that you can cause things to happen other places, right now you have a successful mentality and you can go make things happen. Now, most people are slaves already to their own mind. Introduce AI, which has all of the wisdom of humanity forever, up to the second over and over and over. Wow. And people will say, well, it's going to enslave us. If you're already enslaved to your own mind, of course it will enslave you. I don't know that mindset has ever been more important because AI is an incredible tool if you know where you are and you know where you want to go. I saw a cartoon the other day and it said there's like these investors and it says, uh, you know, we want AI. And then the, the company say back, what do you want it for?

And they go, we don't know, but we want more. Yeah, it's like that. Yeah, it's like that. car where you are traveling and you know you don't have a map and a destination to go to and yeah it will take you faster than you will walk but where you really want to go do you know exactly exactly it's i don't know if you ever did that when you were little you you learn to ride your bike really good you start riding really fast you're riding down the street really fast and then you stop and you realize i don't know where i am i just went farther than i've ever gone i'm not sure i know how to get home. I have a funny story.

I think with AI, we're doing that. We're playing that game right now. Yeah, I have a funny story about the bike. So, you know, I'm a handicap. I wear braces. So my left leg works more powerful than the right one. And I'd have car odds to that. I have a portable attachment for acceleration.

So I used to want to do everything that others do, right? So I, with my younger sister, we used to go out and drive. We used to steal our neighbors two-wheeler like a Vespah in India, you get a lot of those. And in the summer days, we're just driving around. And we don't know the path, right, relating to this story. And then we both realize that because, you know, you have to use your leg, whichever direction you are stopping, and if people are coming from the other direction, and we realize we cannot turn right because then we'll fall. So we kept turning left and left and left and left.

And then while we are doing that, we figured out the path, how we can get by turning so many left to get to our home. And that was beautiful, by the way, while we are on that journey, and I can relate to my life, you know, you need to know where you need to go. You can figure it out while you're having the journey. Important thing is you do need to know, which is what you're mentioning. One thing about AI is what I say to everyone. AI should buy back your time.

So you can spend it on your four phases like you mentioned, which is not finance. If it lets you do more work, you just used it wrong. Don't play me. No, that 100%. I think that AI is awesome. It's a really cool tool. It's the tractor of the mind, right? It's the tractor of the mind.

The tractor came along. And the answer to the tractor was not learn how to shovel faster. The answer to the tractor was not, you know, do work hard. We have a famous story here, John Henry, right? When the steam engine came and the steam, the steam engine could tunnel through the mountain. John Henry was a great, you know, worker. And he said, I can tunnel faster than the steam engine. And so they set up a contest, the steam engine versus John Henry. And John Henry had this massive explosion of energy. He finishes the tunnel before the machine. And the end of the story is telling, and then he dies. You know, and then he dies. And then he dies. for what? The tractor or the steam engine of the mind is here and we can use it to our benefit or we can go out and work ourselves to death

either trying to beat it or with it, right? Because I am seeing a lot of my friends who are high-level entrepreneurs and I'm not immune to this by any means. I noticed this about a month ago. The AI will let me overclock. Remember the old computers like 386, 486? We need to overclock them, yeah.

You could overclock the machine. It was like one of the coolest things because like your machine ran twice as fast right up until it melted. And so you were always like, well, I can overclock it for 20 minutes or I can over. It was amazing. It ran twice as fast, but then it would melt or something would break or, you know, it started to be really erratic. I'm seeing entrepreneurs, including myself, do this.

Like they, now you can do five times as much. But do you want to do five times? Like ask yourself, all tied to? or do I want to do this before that you get into it. Yeah, if it's creating time or maybe a lot of resources for you in a season, great. If it's not, man, watch out. You need boundaries and you need deadlines. I will let myself use it this much for this long, for this purpose.

And when I get out of those boundaries, when I get out of that map for myself, again, everything comes back to where am I and where do I really want to go? If this AI is bringing me there, great. Awesome. know. But I see people putting so much energy into agents and I just kind of laugh. I'm like, well, what is that agent doing? Well, so far, checking my email. I was like, well, was checking your email taking up eight hours of your day? Like, I mean, how much time did that really say? I mean, that's not, I mean, email is important, but it has never been eight hours of my day. I mean,

yeah, I agree. And there's something else which is wrong. Why are paying attention to so many spams also. If you are getting so many emails for the real thing, then you have a bigger business to deal with. So you have to solve it differently than just building an agent. So truly said, you know, I have one good question and then I would want you to provide a tip for the day before I wrap it up. This is a great. Can I say one more thing about AI before, move on? Please. I will say what I think AI is tremendous at. And I have had so much fun. I have KPI across all the aspects of my life, right? Every day I keep 10 promises to myself, right? I sweat, I eat clean, right? I connect with people in my family. I meditate, I journal. I do all these things

and I have data for over 10 years. It's like 15 years of data. You know what AI is really good at? I can push that data in and say, hey, what are the trends that you see? And AI can show me things I've never seen. Like, hey, you know, you never meditate. Like your worst day of meditation is Thursday. Why is that? Your best day of exercise is Monday. Why is that? And it can see patterns that I can't possibly see. We are not consistency machines right as humans.

And so I will say in that and the aggregate and in the analysis, man, AI has been so great for me because it's impartial. It doesn't care. It's just going to tell me what it sees. And then I can make some judgments of where I want to go. And 10 years is a lot of data. I only have like 18 months. and you know, I tend to skip exercise, and I'm always complaining my health is not in the best shape, but then AI is counting that out now.

And, you know, when it sees the busy day, have too many meetings going on, it prompts because I always start, this is all automated, I get a I message, text message. If it says, you have six meetings, I would advise to cancel these two, so then you can fit in your exercise routine there. And don't complain me if you don't do it for the next thing. days and after three days, it ranks saying that, yeah, you kind of missed it and these are the reason why you missed it. So like you said, the patterns are already there. I want you to ask you about the constraints and, you know, gratitude you just mentioned about journaling. I do too.

I'm big on manifestation and a positive mindset like you mentioned. You told me constraints are what produced beautiful results. That a game with no rules is no fun to watch, obviously. what is a constraint in your own life that you did not choose, but that you are genuinely grateful for now? Wow. That's an awesome question. That's one of the best questions I've ever been asked. I was born like an elite athlete.

I didn't realize that until now, honestly, but like I had been an athlete my whole life. I didn't pick that. I realized now what a gift it was. When I was young, I just thought everybody could do it. I just, if you couldn't do what I could do, you must have been lazy or you must have been, but I realize now what a great gift I had. And when I hit about 30 and started having kids, I completely lost my metabolism.

And I completely, I ballooned up. And I have struggled with my weight, partly from my own choice and partly from, from the condition of what I am. Because if you look at all the men of my family, it's like the same pattern, right? And I'm doing well in comparison, but I just, I'm so grateful for that. I am so grateful for that constraint because being a coach, right, being a coach, being out there, being on stage and having a belly is not cool. Like that is, that is not allowed, right? And this was, I was doing the work.

I was doing what needs to happen. I was just playing the wrong game. I was copying what everyone else was doing. I was copying elite coaches, elite athletes and doing what they were doing. But I didn't understand the underlying issue with. me. And so because I wasn't handling the insulin and sensitivity and some other things that now I know, now my weights are moving. It's hilarious to me. Now that I started playing my game and saying, oh, my body acts this way. So I can't eat the same thing that guy does because he has a different

body. Of course, right? Of course. And so now that I've done that, now I'm moving the needle. But I'm so grateful for that because it forced me to live with my biggest flaw out front. you know the coach who's got a cocaine habit or the coach who's a philanderer or the coach who's a fraud you don't see that out front the coach who really struggles with emotional eating and is fat you see that like my thing is right here on my chest like you when i walk out on stage it's out in front of me and i hated it and i hated myself for it for so long but looking at that constraint now it forced me to realize the value of being powerfully imperfect there was a never going to be a picture of me that looked like a perfect man. And you know what? Neither any of the other ones. And once I understood that the game was not to be perfect, the game was to be powerfully imperfect, that perfection actually was a lie. When you see perfection in a human, you'll know it's a lie or it's a story, right? It's a fairy tale. Someone's telling you. It's okay. That's great. We need fairy tales. We need stories, you know, maybe we even need lies, but I don't want

to live that, I want to be a powerfully imperfect person. You know what? With this belly, what can I do? With this, this, whatever it is, right? We all have these giant abilities and these like heroic possibilities. And then we all have these places where we're just not as able. Like, we're just, maybe we're not as smart or maybe we're not as handsome. Maybe we're not as capable. Cool. With all of that, I can be a force of nature. I can be a force for good. I can create. And that's, that is the constraints making it beautiful. Right. Like, baseball is not cricket, is not basketball, is not soccer. They all have different constraints.

And so they all have different ways of being interesting. And if you've ever come into contact with a totally new sport, I'll never forget the first time I watch rugby as an American in France. I just thought, this is the dumbest thing I've ever seen. Like, what in the world are they doing? Five minutes of someone telling me the rules. And I was totally excited. Why? Because after five minutes, I understood the constraints.

And then it was like, wow, they have to do it this way. Wow, that's hard. wow, like you could appreciate with these constraints what these guys were doing. And so, yeah, I think for me, it is, it is that mix of biology and choices that got me fat. And then, and then struggling to erase that, having lived as an elite athlete and then struggling to try to erase that with the guilt and shame of, you shouldn't have done that, right? Which objectively, that's true. But I'm so, I'm so happy for it now because it, it forced me to see perfection is not the goal. Now, that is such a great story and, you know, insight on what it is.

I can relate to it. So I can also add to this, which is there are force constraints versus, you know, the constraints that you choose or you live with. I have folio was never a choice. But initial few years, I had that guilt until I met a friend who also became a music teacher. He was blind. His parent abandoned him. And he was going door to door to teach music to survive on his own and things like that.

Super happy. And, you know, his listening skills obviously heightened and he was a great musician. And then I realized, so what am I complaining about? I can still see, eat, and do other things. So my constraint is I need to use some devices to walk. So what? I can walk, right? and I can do other things and they started building me who I am today.

And that's the best. I actually thank God for that. Like, you know, because of that, I have other abilities that people actually look for. And same thing happened when I started this podcast, like this is the ninth one. And I got into Talk 20 in Apple Podcast and got subscribers fairly quickly. And it's not because it's too polished. It's because I am living my passion. It doesn't matter how I look, what I say, what accent I use.

It's more about what value I give it to others. And most importantly, am I feeling happy and content about what I do? And I truly am. And I have a lot of gratitude to the God, the universe, to the power that you will see in your life. And that's so beautifully put together. And that brings me towards the end of it. if you want to add something to it and then I want to ask you a tip of the day

I generally give it on the AI part. Today we take it to a different level and I love this. So what tip of the day you want to give or do you want to say anything before this? I will tell you that the greatest feeling in the world is to love yourself warts and all. Warts and all.

Like love, can you love yourself? And hey, you know what? There are 30 things in me that I want to do better. There are so many ways that I can improve. I don't have to hate who I am today to love that next version of me. I don't have to say, oh, this guy's a loser and I need to be the next guy. No, I can be very happy and powerfully embrace who I am right now and take the next step towards the next person and the next person.

I just cannot underestimate. I read a book one time. It's funny because I'm actually in the book now called You Are a Badass by Zin. Jen Cicero, a wonderful book. This book literally fell off the shelf. I was at a book store. This is, for those of you are younger, we used to have stores where books sat on the shelves.

I was at a bookstore. It fell off the shelf and it says, you know, the cover, you are a badass. I was like, hey, yes, I am. I guess I'm going to buy this book. I mean, how do you not buy that book in that moment if it falls off? And the end of every chapter, she says some version of love yourself.

And at that moment in my life, 30-something years old, that drove me crazy. I couldn't understand what that had to do with anything. I know, who cares about it? Love myself. I just need to drive. I need to get profit or I need to get my kids right. But it bothered me so much. It just stayed with me. And as I've gotten older, that's my killer tip. It's like, love yourself. Love the people around you. Like the people who you're with, the past is dead. The future is not promised. You are who you are right now. Love that person. and create with that person, be powerfully imperfect, and just move forward.

You are not floating around in the ocean like a bobber. Like you can swim, you can surf, you can do all sorts of things, you know, probably not as good as a lot of the people next to you. Cool, maybe you're not as fast or you're not as good looking or you're not as funny as the, who cares? You're still you, and there's only one of you. And that's pretty awesome. That is so beautifully put together.

Kevin, thank you. This was the kind of conversation. could have kept going for another two hours. How many over balance hit me really hard, season with no end date and a number of, for the parts of life that actually matter, KPI's that is. And that is going to stay with me and for the listener for sure.

To everyone listening, if this gave you something, subscribe to the ThinkI podcast. So you do not miss what is next. And go check out Coach Kevin's work at it's coachcaven.com. I'm Dave Goyer and we have Kevin here. Thanks for listening. Thank you. Appreciate you. You have been listening to Think Yai podcast with Dave.

Take one idea from this episode and turn it into action.