Think Fast Talk Smart: Communication Techniques - 43. Get Psyched: How Time and Situations Shape Our Communication

Episode Date: October 28, 2021

“Social psychologists believe that if we want to understand our own behavior and the behavior of others, the first thing we have to ask or notice is, ‘What is the situation in which they are performing, in which they are behaving?’ And then we want to know as much about the situation as possible.”In this episode of Think Fast, Talk Smart, Stanford emeritus psychology professor Phillip Zimbardo sits down with host Matt Abrahams to discuss how time influences our perception and our positive or negative thought processes. The two also talk about how the findings of Zimbardo’s most notable (and controversial) study — the 1971 Stanford Prison Experiment — inform our understanding of human behavior. Connect:Premium Signup >>>> Think Fast Talk Smart PremiumEmail Questions & Feedback >>> [e-mail] Transcripts >>> Think Fast Talk Smart WebsiteNewsletter Signup + English Language Learning >>> FasterSmarter.ioThink Fast Talk Smart >>> LinkedIn,  Instagram, YouTubeMatt Abrahams >>> LinkedIn ********Thank you to our sponsors.  These partnerships support the ongoing production of the podcast, allowing us to bring it to you at no cost.Strawberry.me. Get 50% off your first coaching session today at Strawberry.me/smartJoin our Think Fast Talk Smart Learning Community and become the communicator you want to be. 

Hi, Matt here. We have two days left before we close our listener viewer survey. A big thank you to all of you who have already provided feedback. Please take a few minutes to share your input on the show. We still have a few prizes left to give to lucky respondents. Go to FasterSmarter.com.com. To give us your input. That's FasterSmartter.com.io slash survey. And now a word from one of our sponsors.

Their support allows us to bring you quality content free of charge. If you've ever thought, I know I can do more, but something's holding me back. You're not alone. Whether you're navigating career growth, seeking better balance, or wanting to communicate with more confidence, coaching can help you bridge the gap between intention and action. At strawberry.comme, you'll get matched with a professional coach who's trained to help you clarify your goals, build lasting confidence, and make intentional choices professionally and personally. This is not therapy. It's not consult. It's a thought partnership designed to help you take action with more clarity and purpose. I strongly believe in the value of coaching. All of us can benefit from the help of a coach.

Visit strawberry.me slash smart to get matched up with your coach today. That's strawberry.combe slash smart and get 50% off your first coaching session. It's the most affordable time ever to see if coaching is right for you. Imagine a professor twirling onto the stage, wearing a cape, and eating a banana sideways, like you would eat corn on the cob. That was my first introduction to my guest today. This curious and confusing first impression was in direct conflict with the many insightful and motivational lessons I and my fellow students would come to learn. Hello, I'm Matt Abrahams, and I teach strategic communication at Stanford Graduate.

School of Business. Welcome to Think Fast, Talk Smart, the podcast. I am incredibly excited and honored to chat with Philip Zimbardo, my former teacher and mentor. Dr. Z, as we call him, is a professor emeritus of psychology at Stanford. Beyond being an incredibly popular professor, Dr. Z was the host of the PBS documentary Discovering Psychology in the author of many books, including the Lucifer effect, the Time Paradox, and his latest Zimbardo, My Life Revealed.

Dr. Z spends a lot of time with his philanthropic organization, the Hero Imagination Project. Welcome, Dr. Z. Thanks for being here. I am super excited to reconnect with you and once again learn from you. Thank you, Matt, for inviting me. I'm excited to share my ideas with you and your ever-expanding audience. Let's get started. You are best known for your your research on prisons and prisoners, the Stanford Prisoner Experiment brought both insights and criticisms. Among many things, the study showed the impact of the situation on people's behavior. Without going into the specifics of the study itself, can you talk about how our environment influences overtly and covertly how we act and interact with others?

I'm a social psychologist, and essentially social psychologists want the world to know. that the best way to predict what you will do in a certain situation is not knowing your personality traits, but knowing the features of that situation. So we believe that the social environment is the main thing that shapes human behavior. And it comes to dominate personality. And that's what the prison study showed. We gave all applicants personality tests, and we want to predict which people who were most sociopathic on the personality test behaved most cruelly as guards had no effect at all.

It was whether you were a prisoner or whether you were a guard, whether you were on the late-night shift where you thought nobody was observing you or you were the day shift. So essentially, social psychologists believe that if we want to understand our own behavior and the behavior of others, that the first thing we have to ask or notice is, what is the situation in which they are performing and which they are behaving? And then we want to know as much about the situation as possible. So it sounds to me that being aware of your situation can give you insight into why you might be behaving a certain way. And secondly, if you were to make some adjustments and alterations to the situation,

you could affect other people's behavior. Is that true? Absolutely true. Yeah, you want to understand how the situation affects you. And then you want to undo the negatives of that situation. so that you're more effective. And also you want to undo it for other people. For a while, you studied what you called time perspective, how people are oriented and relate to time, past, present, and future. On this podcast, we have often discussed how adopting a present-oriented focus

can help with reduced communication anxiety and increased connection with others. Do you have thoughts on how to adjust and adapt our time perspectives? Oh, yeah. So again, out of the prison study, I started to study time perspective because time got distorted. It was the basin of the psychology apartment. There were no windows. Early on, I said nobody's allowed to have wrist watches. There are no clocks. So our time got distorted. We were in this dark basement. We each spent, you know, 10 or 12 hours there. But it got to be that each guard shift felt like a day rather than eight hours. And our time got really. distorted. So at the end of the study, I began to say, I began to think about the psychology of time, how we partition our experiences, the events in our life into categories. When we think back to the past, what do we remember, the good old days or the negatives? When we think about the futures, it's filled with hope or filled with anxiety. And so I developed a scale, the Zimbardo Time Perspective Inventory, ZTPI. And we'd be able to be able to feel with hope, and we'd be able to feel with anxiety. And so I developed a scale, the Zimbardo time perspective,

We administer that and then do research to show that we could predict behavior with that scale better than anything else. But the important thing, Matt, was that when we think about our lives, each of us individually, when I say, think about your past, some people only think about the good old days and some people always think about the horrible old days. When I think about the present, some people think about their inadequacy being shy. other people think about their strengths. When I ask you, think about your future by tomorrow next year, you know, some people become anxious that I don't think I'm going to be able to fulfill my promise. Other people are excited that there's going to be a better tomorrow, even though today is not that good. So we begin that we can categorize people into these different time zones and then make predictions about how they will behave. But we could also give them advice about how to reduce future anxiety and promote

future hope, how to promote present hedonism, enjoying life, rather than present fatalism. When I asked you about the past, I remember the good old times and not the bad old times. And when you do that, we could have a bigger impact on your behavior moving in a positive direction than anything else I've ever done. Can I ask you, Dr. Zia, to give us an example of how, what is something you would suggest people do to become more present hedonistic, for example, if they're future fatalistic? Yeah, so think about your favorite food. Think about your favorite friend. Think about your favorite activity. So it's all getting people to play out what are all the things they like to do.

Between A and B, what is your ideal lifestyle in a sense? And then secondly is you like new things or old things. You like familiar things or novel things. And we try to then push you with suggestions, with recommendations, to be present hedonist means that you enjoy things that are new, things that are different, things that are exciting. You prefer new rather than familiar. So it sounds like you're encouraging people to really think about the things that are important to them in the moment, and that, in essence, distracts them or takes their attention away from thinking about those things in the future. Yeah. So it's once you're stabilizing the present, then you can be able to say the best is yet to come. Start from a good solid foundation into here and now. And then you say, okay, but Matt, I'm enjoying the 20 minutes we have together. I'm so excited you asked me to do this. Of course, I have a lot of other things on my agenda. But when we finish, I'll turn to them. I won't be thinking about them now. And so it's again, it's enjoying what you're doing as fully as positive. possible in the moment. And that's what it means to be a hedonist, seeking new ideas, new things,

new friends, new adventures, and never being, hedonists are never bored. They always find a new direction to go. Well, first, I appreciate you being hedonistic with us right now, and we appreciate your time. I think a lot of us associate negative ideas with hedonism, but in fact, when it comes to helping us feel more present oriented and focused on the moment, it actually is a good thing to strive for. Right. Yes. Returning to the Stanford Prison Experiment, people focus almost exclusively on the negative actions, many of the randomly assigned guards perpetrated on the randomly assigned prisoners. Yet over the last several years, your work has focused on the heroic acts some of the participants engaged in. In other words, you now study, teach, and support ways to encourage courageousness

and heroism. What can you tell us? about what goes into creating heroes who are willing to take great risks to do what they see is right? Oh, yes. Thanks, Matt, for bringing in it up. So you mentioned my book, The Looser Effect. So the Lucer Effect's 15 chapters of evil, prison study, Abu Ghraib, Nazi concentration, because I go into great detail and all that. And then the last chapter, I say, enough, enough. We have seen how easy it is for good people to do bad things. But let me raise the question as to to whether or not ordinary people can become heroes. And once you say that, you challenge the typical notion that heroes are special people.

Because when we think of heroes, who do we think of? Martin Luther King, Mother Teresa, Nelson Mandela, we think of these classic, bigger-than-life people. And I'm saying, no, a hero is anyone. Children can be heroes. Anyone who stands up, speaks out, and takes action to help someone else in distress. So heroes challenge the passivity of bystanders who do nothing. So heroes are upstanders rather than bystanders. And then I say, it's not enough.

I can say it, but I want to give you an image or vision of what you could be. But then I'm going to teach you how to do so. And so I created lessons that go into depth about transforming passive bystanders into active upstanders. And so I have videos. that we distribute to schools and businesses that say, what is a negative bystander? What is a positive upstander? What are examples?

I give videos of people helping and not helping. What are the barriers to helping? What are the challenges? What are the rewards? And so that would be one lesson. And then the next lesson would be how to transform prejudice and discrimination into understanding and acceptance of people

who are different from you. What I so appreciate about your work is it has always been very applauded. So you look at it very academically and theoretically, and then you find ways of applying it. And you were always so creative in your research designs. I remember doing research with you, and just your lab itself was like a toy store full of really interesting ways to do research. And that was fantastic. I want to, as we get close to wrapping up, I can't let you go without asking you to tell more about your teaching style and your philosophy on how.

how to make information interesting, engaging, and memorable. All of us are in a position where we have important ideas and information to get across, and you are a true master teacher. What are some of your secrets for helping people to learn new things, to care about things that they might not normally care about? How do you teach people that? First, there has to be a reason for the audience to listen to you. You need a dynamic beginning. And that's why, so you have to capture the audience's attention, a dramatic opening statement with unusual music, with unusual apparel. So now I'm going to give lecture after we finish to a high school class. So I'm wearing a special shirt I had made up with a big Z in place of the S or Superman. So you've got to get the attention of the audience

somehow. And then once you get it, you got to give them a reason why they should keep attention to you and not get distracted by what's on their cell phone. And so it's, it's a lot. Again, it's almost always starting with a new idea. And I would do this every lecture because, you know, if you teach an introductory psych, which I did for 40 years, psychology doesn't change much from term to term to term. What I would then always do, I would always look at the newspaper and look at the heading. And then I might begin by saying, did you know to the class and then mention something outrageous? Now, how could that be?

You know, how many of you think this is true? think this is not true. Even just doing that, getting the class to raise their hand, the audience gets activated rather than you lecturing and they are, you are presenting and they are absorbing. So it's always, even in a big class, I got people raised their hand. I vividly remember being in your psych one class, the introductory psych class, and there were hundreds of us. You taught us about hypnotism, but then you actually had us walk through a hypnotism drill where the person sitting next to me actually was swatting at imaginary flies as a result. So again, part of what I hear you saying is it's not just about the information, it's about the

experience and how that experience is made engaging and relevant. And you were a true master at that. And those of us who were your students who've gone on to teach, try to enliven our teaching with some of the skills we learned from you. Before we end, go ahead, please. Okay, good, thanks. The idea is your audience is giving you a chunk of time and time is really a precious commodity. You want them to come away with at least one thing that's memorable. And to say, wow, I didn't know that before this class and now I do.

So that's the burden of being a good teacher. It's can you package your ideas so that in such a way, even if they're complex ideas, the audience will come away knowing one new thing and be happy to have that. that new idea implanted in their brain. You have given us many new ideas today. We'll be right back to finish our conversation. But first, a quick word from one of our sponsors. Their support allows us to bring you this show free of charge. If you've ever felt like you're trying to do everything yourself, especially when the stakes are high, you're not alone. One of the biggest shifts I see in effective leaders growing their organizations comes from focusing on the right things. But that's hard to do

when you're stretched thin. You need to be able to delegate some tasks to competent professionals. That's where Upwork can really help. Upwork is a one-stop platform to find, hire, and pay expert freelancers across areas like marketing, development, data and analytics, and more. It gives you fast access to specialized talent so you can move quickly, fill key gaps, and scale your work without taking on full-time overhead. You can browse profiles, review past work, and get support scoping your project so you can hire with confidence. It's a simple way to focus your time where it matters most. Visit upwork.com right now and post your job for free.

That's upwork.com to connect with top talent ready to help your business grow. That's upw-w-rk.com. Upwork.com. And now, back to our conversation. But before we end, I'd like to ask you the same three questions I ask everyone who joins me. Are you up for that? I can try. I like the cautious enthusiasm there.

Question number one, if you were to capture the best communication advice you have ever received as a five to seven word presentation slide title, what would it be? What are those five to seven words of advice you'd give? Inspire, direct, reverberate, challenge, stimulate, dramatize. Ooh, I like that one.

So you've just given us a rubric by which we can measure our communication. If we hit even a subset of those, I think our communication will be better. Now, this is a tough one because I know you've had the opportunity to be around some amazing people. But question two is, who is a communicator that you admire and why? Well, there are a lot of great communicators in my life. When I was, I was in a program with Noam Chomsky, who's now 95 years old and still around, presenting very complex ideas with examples that the audience, even an audience of young students could understand immediately. So again, his skill was taking very complex ideas and reframing them in ways that anyone in the audience would say, yeah, I got it.

You ought to be able to take ideas in your domain, whether it's psychology, whether it's medicine, whether it's linguistic, and suck out the core and then present it in a way that people say, I got it. That's incredibly important. And you do a very good job of that. We had a whole episode on this podcast where we talked about what I define is accessibility. How do you make complex ideas that are domain-specific accessible to people? Let me ask you our third question and final question. What are the first three ingredients that go into a successful communication recipe? So if you were making a whipping up a recipe of communication, what would those first three ingredients be? One of the key is to know your audience. Absolutely. Know what their values are.

Know where they stand on various issues. A big thank you, Dr. Z. Once again, you've helped me and our listeners. learn incredibly interesting and helpful ideas. As a close, I just personally want to offer a very heartfelt thank you for your mentorship, your support, and role modeling. You were the first teacher to ignite my passion for communication in helping others to reach their full potential. So thank you for that. Well, thank you, Matt Abrams for having me on again, and let's do it next year. Thanks for joining us for another episode of Think Fast, Talk Smart, the podcast.

produced by Stanford University's graduate school of business. For more information in episodes, visit gsb.standford.edu or subscribe to our show wherever you get your podcasts. Finally, find us on social media at stamford.gb. Before we wrap up, I just want to say thank you for listening. It really means a lot to hear how people all over the world are using these ideas in their own lives. It inspires me and the whole team that brings you this show. If you want more episodes and resources,

feel free to follow, subscribe, and explore past conversations. We're grateful for your support of Think Fast Talk Smart.