This Is Important - Ep 101: 101 Podcasts To Hear Before You Die

Episode Date: September 13, 2022

Today, this is what's important: Disney movies, big testicles, the movie Sneakers, substitue teaching, baseball fields, bullies, adult sports, and more. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hi, I'm David Eagleman. I have a new podcast called Inner Cosmos on iHeart. I'm going to explore the relationship between our brains and our experiences by tackling unusual questions like, can we create new senses for humans? So join me weekly to uncover how your brain steers your behavior, your perception, and your reality. Listen to Inner Cosmos with David Eagleman on the iHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Last season, millions tuned into the Betrayal podcast to hear a shocking story of deception. I'm Andrea Gunning, and now we're sharing an all-new story of betrayal. Ashley Lytton was helping her husband set up a business Venmo account when she discovered

a terrible secret. I saw it in a folder, and I opened it. What the hell did I just see? Listen to season two of Betrayal on the iHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Between April 1971 and September 1972, six young black girls were snatched off the streets in Washington, D.C. This child was laying on the side of the road. The person said, I murdered your daughter. The killer believed that he may have been seen. I will admit the others when you catch me if you can. Signed Freeway Phantom. Listen to Freeway Phantom on the iHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome to This Is Important, a production of iHeart Radio, the show where we talk about what's

obviously most critically, crucially important. Today on This Is Important. Tonight on episode 101, Kyle says things, I guess. Yes, dude, I was a hot first baseman. You couldn't concentrate because you kept staring at this adult man's ballsack. It was either a bit or he's a pervert, or a little bit of both. Strap in. Another one. 101 Dalmatians. 101 Dalmatians, here we are. Cruella De Vil. That movie is fucking, would they ever make a movie like 101 Dalmatians anymore? I hope so. Didn't they just make Cruella, bro? They did. Yeah, I didn't watch Cruella and I heard it was not. It was cool. I liked it, but it was less about how she's... Oh yeah, it's Psycho. It's Psycho. The whole plot of the original movie is Psycho. She wants to, she kidnaps dogs to skin them alive

where their coats run. I know. It's kind of sick. It's a fucking... One second. What? Yes, that's the, how else do you think we get four coats? Break it down. No, no, no. I know. I know. I'm saying for a children's... But she's not going to skin the dogs alive. Yes, she is. She's going to drown them first. Some of them. No, okay. Yeah, she's going to kill them and then take their spots. She wants their spots for her coats. I want that spot. It's hard when you're actually watching it with your kid. When you're a little kid, I think it's pretty gnarly, but I like that about Disney movies. They like leaned into the gnarliness of, like how, I think we talked about on the first...

Walt Disney was super gnar. That guy was so gnarly. Then he cut his own head off and freeze it in a fucking... Yeah, it's frozen somewhere, man. That's sick. Gnar dog. And that's a fact. He cut it off himself. That's a fact, Blake. Thank you for spreading it. Hey, Cruella de Vil, though, was your mind blown when you realized it was cruel devil? I just learned that right now and it is melting my shit, dude. I was today years old. I was today years old. But I'm sorry. It was Cruella de Vil. I was today years old.

Why is it cruel devil? Just think of the root words. It's Cruella de Vil. Sorry? Cruella de Vil. Cruella de Vil. Just take from that. Take from that. Yeah, I get it. But like, Cruella is not cruel. It just has cruel in it. Cruella. And devil. Cruella. That's definitely... Wait. Oh, I thought if you spelt it out, it spelt cruel. No, no. I'm just saying it's like the...

No, Kyle, what the fuck, dude? Kyle, so you just made some shit up? Kyle, that's obvious. Wait, what did you think? You just made some fucking bullshit up? I'm not making up bullshit. What are you talking about right now? You just said it said cruel devil. That it comes from?

It doesn't. It doesn't spell cruel devil. Yeah, it's not cruel devil. Yeah, obviously it sounds like Cruella de Vil, like what? But it doesn't say cruel devil. Oh, I don't know what I'm talking about. What the fuck are you talking about? So you knew that and then you acted like that when I said that? What the fuck?

Did I knew that it sounded similar to cruel devil? Or it looks similar to that on paper? Yeah, but is it actually cruel devil? No. What did you think I was saying? That it was actually cruel devil. Cruel devil, like you paused the conversation and you said, dude, did you realize that Cruella de Vil is actually cruel devil? Yeah, so what the fuck did you think, you dumbass?

It's not that. Hey, Kyle, here's what I thought. I thought that it was like a Disney Easter egg, where they spelled it in a way that when you look at it written, it's cruel devil. No, this is such bullshit. You guys are making this up right now. No, this is what we thought. It was cruel devil in a way that they would hide like sex written on the wall

in Little Mermaid or like the weird little things that does. That was lying king. All good teenagers take off your clothes. Bro, we're talking about watching this movie when we're little kids. Dicks on Little Mermaid's cover. Yes, there were cocks. There was lots of cocks. There were huge cocks.

Which is so cool. The towers were cocks. That's so cool. Kyle, don't spread misinformation about fucking. We're going to get flagged. What the fuck are you guys talking about? Hey, Kyle, just say allegedly and we can move on, man. Just say it.

I can't believe I'm having this conversation with you guys right now. Just say it, Kyle. Allegedly. All I was saying was how much was your mind blown when you realized that Cruella DeVille sounded like cruel devil. Play it back. Zero percent. I was five years old.

Yeah, zero percent. And how did you feel? And how did you feel? I go, yeah, that makes sense. I'm like, yeah. Hey, guys, I want to say that I don't even know if I ever put it together. To me, I just took it at face value. I was like, yeah, that's your name, Cruella DeVille.

Because it's nothing. Okay. So Adam, now we can have this actual conversation without so many sidebars filled with dumb shit. Okay. Okay, okay. So I didn't know that. So when Kyle said that, I was like, oh yeah, clever.

But admittedly. Okay. I was taken aback when I, it's not spelled that way. Because I thought it was like a hidden thing that, how Disney does a lot of weird, cool, hidden shit where they put. Right. It is hidden. It kind of is hidden.

Cool. Like teaching kids about sex, like fucking perverted animators. You thought it was cool. But when you're a kid, watching it, and you find out. It's not allegedly, it's real. Yeah. It's real. But when you find out that they're like doing this weird shit,

like putting dicks on it. I know, I know. It's not one of the, I know. Drawing cocks on Little Mermaid. Yeah. Well, no, the cock is on the priest. The boner. I thought it was awesome.

As a little boy, I was like, oh shit, sex is the coolest. Rock and roll. Kyle was talking about, there is a scene at the end of Little Mermaid where it looks like the priest gets a boner when he's like talking. But a real thing. Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today. He gets the boner right there. But the real thing was that on the cover.

On that fat ass plastic VHS cover, if you look at the castle in the background, King Triton's castle, there is a fucking raging cock. Yeah, it's golden. As a tower. But it's so big, it couldn't be. No dude. No dude. Forget it.

Well, what are the other ones? I mean, I know what you're saying, but it couldn't be that big, right? It's a cartoon. Yes, it is a cartoon. Yes. Okay. It's like the idea of a penis for sure. The other one is when the Lion King lays down into like Simba,

like lays down into a bunch of those, what are those called? Where you blow on them and. Like the reeds or whatever. Dandelions. Dandelions. Yeah, dandelions. Oh, I thought it was when Scar laid down like in the dirt. It's spelled something out.

No, this is, it happens in the air. He's like, his dick kind of falls out and like, yeah, his dick hits first. You can see Scar's balls out the back. Yeah, he's on the dirt and his balls just fucking just. You know, Scar had some big swinging nuts from the dastardly deeds he did. Scar was great. Scar was. Some of the worm bag?

We're back. Scar's worm bag was swag. Scar had a huge cock. That's why he was hella mad because he's like, why is Mufasa getting all the gas? Because my cock is fucking huge. But it's not always about that. Yeah. I am king.

I will be king. My cock is huge. My cock is huge. No, Simba. I don't know. So I feel like Mufasa had the big dick energy. If anybody had it, he was like, oh, for sure. Because nobody messes with my boy.

Dude, he did. Well, I didn't, I actually wasn't talking about his cock. I was talking about his balls. You know, Scar has like a little dick, but giant, giant nuts. Sure, for sure. Yeah, those are not the same thing. You can have big balls, small cock. And that's why he can't like run that well.

And like, yeah. Yeah, straight up. We need to respect the homies with the big ass balls a little more. I feel like the homies with the really big potato. My right nut is larger. It is much larger than my left nut. That's bad. And you should go to the doctor.

You get a little bit of respect. Yeah, you should go to the doctor for that. But that's three more years. Bag of worms. We've covered it. It was it was cold. He couldn't get a good grip on it. It's fine.

But okay. Okay. So in there's the sex in the air. Sorry. Right. That's it. It goes in the air. But what's there's one from Aladdin.

Blake, do you remember the Aladdin one? Yeah, Aladdin. It was the the bee. It was just like, take off your clothes. Yes. Right. That's what it is. Yeah.

When he's backing up away from the tiger and he says, all good teenagers, take off your clothes. Really? It was the bee, I thought. I thought it was the bee when they're on the balcony. He's on. Is it a bee? I thought he was a tiger.

I thought he was speaking directly to Jasmine when this went down. No, no, no. He's backing away from something. Here's what I'm thinking of. I'm thinking of, there might have been. There might have been. Let me see your hands, Adam. Hands up.

Okay. While you're describing this, let me see those hands, please. Because you'd be cranking down. I do love Jasmine. It was the bee when the genie turns into a bee and is like going around and telling Aladdin to do certain things. And then they're on the balcony and he's talking with Jasmine and then he whispers to cover your nose or something like that.

That's what I thought. Okay, okay. And here are my hands. Okay, good. Let's see those hands. I will not show mine. Here's what I remember. Okay.

I remember that he gets to her balcony on his magic carpet and she has a pet guard tiger that rolls up on him. That's right. Oh, yeah. That's Raja. That's Raja. Okay. And he's backing away going, all good teenagers,

take off your clothes. And then she's like, Raja, no, and call the tiger back. And then I just think they remember them fucking. What? Was that not, that wasn't. This ain't Aladdin. This, this ain't Aladdin. I'd watch that porn on parody.

No, because I remember I went over to some girls house and they were like, you have to see this. And they, they played that exact clip to be like, did you see that? He said, I'll go to you to take off your clothes. Wow. And I was like, yeah. And you're like, should we watch it again and maybe listen up? I mean, should we take off our clothes?

Are we good teenagers? We're 10. You were a teenager watching Aladdin, bro. No, we were like, probably 12. And I remember these girls were like, have you seen this part of Aladdin? Yeah. But at 12, you're starting to perk up. You're starting to be like, ooh, I think girls were pretty cool.

Bad joke. And who knows? Maybe this was their like, their door into like, necking. Man, necking. I know. I'm sorry. It was a bad joke. I didn't hear you.

Yeah. What'd you say? Nothing. What'd you say? Tonight on episode 101, Kyle says things, I guess. I do. I do. What did you say?

Kyle Mumblecore. Let's hear it. I can't remember. I think I said, grow up because you were watching Aladdin when you were a teenager. What an epic slam. And that's a joke. Wow. Save that for when we do epic slams at the end.

Yeah. Because you got to, you got to bring that one back. I can't save anything. Because I don't know where we go from here now. Like. No, we're in it now. We're in it, bro. You're right here.

You guys are digging on me and this is what it is. So let's just have a fun episode like this. All right. Go ahead. Hit me. Don't tell me what to do. Hit me. Back to my point of Disney movies being super aggressive, like 101 Dalmatians being all

about like killing a ton of dogs. I feel like they absolutely wouldn't make a movie like that anymore. Like it's just not palpable too. Those would not, those would not be the stakes of a child's film. Right. Right. It would not be. Yeah.

No. What's the closest they have come to that besides like the video up and we lost Blazer. Who cares? Moving on. Blake has had enough. I don't know. Like what's these? I mean, because these movies these days are like sad, right?

They'll be like a parent or like a divorce or something going on that makes like the opening first act of the movie very sad. So you care. Right. But there's nothing very like terrifying like that. Right. There's not a lot of cruel devils in these kids movies anymore. Yeah.

Not a ton of cruel devils anymore. Not a ton of cruel devils. That sucks. Yeah. Do your kids like the old Disney shit or are they like, uh, nah, let me watch that new, new. I think it's, it comes, it's a movie by movie basis. Yeah. They like it both.

They like them both. Are they, when they watch an old movie like that, are they like taking it back by how like, you know, it is. Yes. My, my son put together that they, that all their skin was going away when he was like, you know, that she wanted to kill them and like take their skin and he's like three years old and he's like asking why. Like it's like, what, what the hell?

Um, and it was like, yeah, I don't, I don't know why this is in this movie, dude. Like, no, it's fucking cool. Do people take dog skin? No. Yeah. Because she's the bad guy. Yeah. That's the whole point is this is where I'm, I don't understand.

By the way, now the whole thing with Cruella is that in that movie, it was like her backstory as to why she was so cruel. That's so stupid. Like explaining why people are evil in a movie and it's like, all right, but like, let's just, for the sake of having a 90 minute movie, maybe not get into the whole backstory of a bad, like an evil person. Do we have to? Yeah, exactly.

Why do we have to justify for the, on the Cruella movie with Emma Stone? That was a good movie and that was live action. I liked it. I liked the movie. I thought it was pretty good. I think it was well done, but I just was kind of like, all right, sure. Yeah. Conceptually, like what are we doing?

We're spending this whole movie to justify why we, why they made it so like violent, like in the first one where you're like, when you really think about killing 101 Dalmatians, that is a violent thought, you know? So now we have to be like. And I like that. That's even the name of the movie is 101 Dalmatians. And you're like, oh, I wonder why it's 101. Like that's a very specific number.

Oh, cause that's the perfect amount she needs to kill and skin in order for her to get the perfect coat. And what's also weird is that she already has like a pretty big black and white for coat. She does. Yeah. She's got a sick coat. Yeah. She's just like greedy.

So like I'm almost kind of offended that she's like, I need another black and white for a coat. Like, okay, like this is, this is a bad person. Yeah. Privilege much. Okay. Yeah. You got money.

All right. Good. By the way, like super hot. You thought Cruella was hot? She had something about her. Really? Go off. No, I'm just kidding.

Those chompers. Great job. God, they were like, let's make her despicable. Let's give her like yellow teeth. She's smoking that long cigar thing or cigarette thing. Yep. Yeah. We're still talking about Cruella, pal.

Welcome back. Hey, Blake's back. A little bit. You're back. What's going on over there? Beezer, your internet sucks? Balls or what? Nope.

Can't hear you. All right. We cannot hear you. Hey, I'm glad. I'm just glad this didn't happen on the 100, on our very special 100th episode. I don't even remember what happened on that so long ago. A lot of really fun, good stuff happened on it. We talked for 20 minutes about how I was a bitch.

You thought it was dying. And it turns out he just gets bad headaches now. Migraines. Right. Cool. Oh, that's cool. Migraines are your grains. I honestly kind of always thought when people got migraines, I'm like, oh, that's not real.

Like they're just being a bitch. Like a little bit. I was like, I get it. Headaches suck. Like, and you got a bad headache. I'd never been around it until Sarah at Wargaholics on the writing staff would get them and would just would have to go peace out into her office and like lay down in the dark. Yeah.

Or would have to like go home. I remember back in the day, she would like. We let her go home. Yeah. Yeah, we did. I can't believe it. That's insane. Does this work?

Hey, there you are. How's it going, bud? Yeah. And he's back. Fuckin' A. It's a terrible connection over here. Can we talk about Cruella Devil? Yeah, well, why did you do like a Scottish accent when you.

Don't talk about the Cruella Devil. The Cruella Devil got in my microphone, baby. Let that one hang there. This is the episode where everything hangs, bro. Let it hang. Hang like my right nut. Yeah. So the guys with big balls, they have, do they, do they jiz more or do they have deeper?

I love that. I left and we're still here and I love it, baby. They have deeper voices, right? If your balls are bigger, your voice is deeper, right? You think that's a, I don't know if that's connected. I don't know. Well, you're saying it's directly connected to testosterone, correct? Well, I don't know.

Is testosterone connected to the deep voice? Is that a thing? I don't know. So, well, admittedly, when it's hot out, when it's like really hot out and your ball sack is when your nuts are really hanging. Slapping. You're slapping the sides of your thighs. That's the worst, right?

Thighs? Like, isn't it the absolute- Are you asking? Worse, when you sit down and you're like sitting on your nuts, I'd much rather have cold nuts all the time. When you belvedere yourself, do people know what that means? Yeah, the belvedere. I know what that means.

I guess Mr. Belvedere, the actor like would sit on his balls all the time. Which by the way, Mr. I didn't know what Mr. Belvedere was. It was a sitcom from Derz's childhood. Like the 70s. Yeah. Late 60s, early 70s. What are we talking about?

We got a lot of good birds, bro. Epic slam. Epic slam. So, it was a show about a butler or something from the 80s that Derz watched. Yeah, what was Mr. Belvedere about? Derz was alive. I don't even know what it was, but yeah, he was like a nanny that was a man, which was like a whole new thing, Adam.

A whole new world. I did that. He paved the way for you on Modern Family. On Modern Family, yeah. Hey, thank you. Thank you, Mr. Belvedere. Give your flowers to Mr. Belvedere. He's just still alive.

I'm going to save them. I'm going to save them here in about 20 or 30 minutes. I'm going to give some flowers. Good, good, great. Okay. Okay. We like that. But it was him.

It was the guy who was like the announcer for the Milwaukee Brewers. What's that guy's name? The Milwaukee. Or maybe he played for him. He was like this. Wait, what? What a deep cut. The Milwaukee Brewers.

How would any of us know who the announcer for the Milwaukee Brewers? Yeah, like the baseball announcer guy. Oh, it's Bob Uker, right? Yeah, Bob Uker. Bob Uker. U-Banks? U-Uker? Uker.

I'm looking at it right now. Kevin U-Banks was Jay Leno's guitar player. All right. He also wrestled. The guy who just sat there going, Dude, he was sick. Well, who was the... I mean, that's a real question.

Bob Uker. You're okay to continue. But wait, you guys don't know who Bob... Bob Uker, I feel like was just a guy who was like famous for some reason. Wasn't Bob Uker in those baseball movies? Yeah. Yeah. I think he was...

Wait, is he in Major League? He was in Major League. That's him. But wasn't he an actual... Okay, so he was a real baseball announcer for the Milwaukee Brewers. I thought he was. No, it can't be the guy I'm thinking of. Because that dude is so funny in Major League.

There's no way that dude is not a comedic actor. Why? That guy could just be funny. They can be both. Yeah. They can be both, man. Announcers, they talk a lot. They're funny, bro.

Yeah. You know how many jokes announcers get? Yeah, they're nonstop. I mean, by the way, like, I don't know. Look at this dude. By the way, he's just what a cool grandpa. If this is the guy I'm thinking about, he has some of the best comedic reads in Major League.

He played... He played professional baseball, and he's a current sportscaster and comedian, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, he was... It's the guy. It's the guy from Major League, Blake. Yes.

When he hits the homerun, he's like, ah, shit. He's so funny. Absolutely rude. Is he still alive? 88. Still going. 88's looking great.

Oh, my God. All right. Let's stop talking about it. Let's stop talking about it. Yeah, let's stop talking about it. We kill Bob. I'm going to be pissed. I'm going to be fucking pissed.

The curse continues, dude. Let's stop it here. 88, man. Yeah, born in 1934. That guy might be the funniest part of the Major League movies. He is so funny. Agreed. And he's in the booth with John Candy.

Oh, shit. Is that right? I don't remember that. John Candy's in Major League? Major League won at least. That's a major gap in my movie knowledge. Yeah, I don't remember that either. I don't remember that.

I think. Well, anyway, he's on Mr. Belvedere, and he just plays like a guy. Okay, so, but Mr. Belvedere, the reason you were telling this story. Oh, but Mr. Belvedere. Yes, yes, yes, yes. Yes, Mr. Belvedere.

Let's go back to him. About the long dots. He, apparently, the actor who played Mr. Belvedere. Christopher Hewitt. Would often sit on his own balls and be like, And then, hey, he would have to cancel. So they called it Mr. Belvedere. When you Mr. Belvedere.

Bro, I already fucked up. John Candy is not in Major League. Thank you. I think so, dude. Thank you. He's an announcer. I know who he's the announcer in, because I was in that movie, dude.

Okay, my boy. He is the announcer in Rookie of the Year. I'm sorry. I got my baseball movies crossed. Come on, man. I'm so sorry. Yeah. I'm sorry.

This is why we don't love you. Buddy. I'm sorry. It's okay. It makes sense. I love you, Blake. I'm unlovable. Uker Big Balls, right?

Uker for sure, Big Balls. Do you have a deep voice? Blake. He had a register, you know? Okay, yeah. I'm trying to think, who has huge testicles? I find that usually larger men have huge testicles. We had this one substitute teacher.

Oh, dude. I know who you're going to talk about. His name was Mr. Lobscher. Like legit name, or he just said, call me that. His name was Lobscher? Mr. Lobscher. They said Lobster. He wouldn't stand to teach.

He would only sit to teach. But of course, he wore like khaki dockers or whatever. And when he could sit down. Loose pairs. It looked like this motherfucker had a whole ass, two potatoes in the size pant leg, bro. Just like spuds, bro. Spuds.

Spuds, Mackenzie. Like it was hard to pay attention to social studies because thank God he was a substitute teacher because it was distracting how large his testicles were. So you couldn't concentrate because you kept staring at this adult man's ballsack. Well, dude, the thing is, is like, yeah. Yes, okay.

Yes, all right. Yes, 100%. When you're like, what? We were like 11 or 12? When you're 12. When you're horny. Yes, I was just saying you're a horny 12-year-old. Somebody's like, yo, check out this part of that dude up there.

And you're just like, oh, my God. That's a cool way to put it. You can't stop. Jill, what is this part of that dude up there? Adam, were we in the same improv class when that dude showed up in short khaki shorts and his no underwear and his balls were just hanging out? He was one of the teachers for like a moment.

I want to say it was a guy like this. I would definitely remember that. That would be seared into my Snapchat brain. I want to say it was the guy who played the janitor on Scrubs. John Candy. Blake. You've told me about this guy before. He came in to let cover for our teacher.

I think he's a second city guy and was like, yeah, I'll get back to basics and coach some kids. And he just showed up total man spreading and everything was hanging out. And it was so dark. So he knew. Had to have. Oh, he might have been trolling.

I should have. Yeah, it's a bit, dude. It was either a bit or he's a pervert or a little bit of both. It might be both. It can't be both. It can't be both. It can be both. It can never be both.

It can never be both. Why could it not be? There's no such thing as an Uber perverted bit. It's a joke. It's either rooted in sexuality or it's. It's a joke. Yes. I agree.

I agree. Is that the first time that's been said on this pod? I agree. I hope so. I agree. I agree, Anders. That bro was a fucking weirdo. I think it could be.

It can be two pervert. I think there is a little bit of a gray area there where. The guy is a little perverted. He does have his nuts hanging out, but also. I'll take this walk with you. It's not his dick. It's his nuts. I think this was both.

Nuts are not sexual. What? It's not my dick. I saw everything. Nuts. It's not sexual. It's funny. It's not.

Yeah. What? Unless you like it. It has to be separated. What's that guy's name? And by the way, this guy obviously was not doing that. His name up. Allegedly.

Don't look at his damn name up. What's his name? Everyone knows. Yeah. Who are you calling them out by name, man? It was John Candy. John Candy. R.A.P.

I don't know if it was this guy, but it was a guy exactly like this guy. Like he might have, the guy I'm talking about might have been the guy who like lost every role to Neil Flynn, whose dick was not out. Neil Flynn. Who's that? He's the janitor on scrubs.

He's the janitor on scrubs. Allegedly. He's the guy whose TV career we would all take because he's been in everything for 25 years. What is that one documentary where it's like, hey, that's me. I was in that or whatever. Did you guys ever watch that?

Oh yeah, with Tobolowski or whatever. Yeah, it's kind of it. Steve and Tobolowski. It's just basically all the actors that are in everything, but you can never like, you don't know their names, but they're literally in everything and they're always like amazing actors. They just like.

And then you watch the documentary and they're like, my name is this and you immediately forgot their names. You're like, all right. What an effort. They're like, and after the documentary, dude, I'm going to be like the star of the next avatar and everyone's still like fucking it's the guy from Serial Mom who like, oh, that guy.

He's like that person, but they are incredible. Who the hell is that? Who the hell is that? That, who the hell is that? Hi, I'm David Eagleman. I have a new podcast called Inner Cosmos on iHeart. I'm a neuroscientist and an author at Stanford University, and I've spent my career exploring the three pound universe

in our heads. On my new podcast, I'm going to explore the relationship between our brains and our experiences by tackling unusual questions so we can better understand our lives and our realities. Like, does time really run in slow motion when you're in a car accident? Or can we create new senses for humans?

Or what does dreaming have to do with the rotation of the planet? So join me weekly to uncover how your brain steers your behavior, your perception, and your reality. Listen to Inner Cosmos with David Eagleman on the iHeart radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Music Last season, millions tuned into the Betrayal podcast

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I was scared that he was coming home. What Ashley discovered that day was a secret so dark she feared for her life. She was like, oh my god, I gotta get out of the house. He's gonna find out that I've seen this, he's gonna come kill me. Music Listen to season two of Betrayal on the iHeart radio app,

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and the drawing boards of this team to experience the life breathed into the Bridgerton prequel. Listen to the leaps executive producer and series director Tom Verica took to capture the feeling that's put that lump in your throat. And you've got to catch creator Shonda Rhimes. She's dropping gems, diamonds, and mics. On this podcast, we're going beyond the basic line

of questioning and getting to the heart of the show, all while appreciating the contributions of the show's creative teams and remarkable cast. Go inside each episode of Queen Charlotte at Bridgerton's story with the creatives, the cast, and creator Shonda Rhimes leading the way. Listen to Queen Charlotte, the official podcast, Thursdays on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcasts, or anywhere you get your podcasts. Yeah, well, Stephen Tobolowski has been in like... Who's that? He's from, like, sneakers. He's the guy who's like... Oh, I like sneakers. Yeah, sure. Yeah, he's the guy who she goes on the date with,

and she's got to get him to say all the words that are just, my voice is my passport verifying me. Oh, my God, that movie rocks. I just remembered. God, that movie kicks butt, bro. And I remember so little from that movie. He's the guy, he's Needle Nose Ned from Groundhog Day. Oh, yes.

This dude rocks. He's hella funny. He's super duper funny. Oh, yeah. This guy's a G. Oh, yeah, the guy... He's the guy in Spaceballs who's like, we can't do that.

Dude, he's so funny. Jesus Christ, this guy's been in everything. He's got to be from Chicago, I feel. Yeah. Yeah, he's in Groundhog's Day. Yeah. Remember that shit. We'll post them immediately on the Instagram

so you guys can follow along. Everybody knows him. The scene, I want to post the scene in from Sneakers because it's so good. She's like hitting on him and he's like a dork who all of a sudden reveals that he's an egomaniac and thinks he's the man. And she's like, I can't believe I have to put up for them.

But you know what? She loves Robert Redford. Who does? They've got long history. Damn, Sneakers. Great movie. What a great film. It's kind of like a Mission Impossible episode

as a movie, though. It's kind of sick like that. It's so good. River Phoenix, Sidney Poitier, Dan Aykroyd. Like, come on, come out. Ben Kingsley fucking kills it. Ben Kingsley. What movie is this again?

Sneakers. Sneakers. This is Sneakers? Dude, I don't even know if I've ever seen this movie. Really? I always pretend like I have when we talk about it. I'm like, yeah, I truly don't know if I have. Honey, what's the matter?

Honey, I had to lie about Sneakers again today, and it's just it's eating me alive. I feel like there's a gap between me and my friends. Adam, do you do that? Because I feel like I should have. I'm going to go watch Soprano's first episode for seventh time. Sweetheart, you're walking into the garage. Not even the first episode, dude, the entire series.

David Strathorne, you will not be disappointed in Sneakers. Oh, there's literally, I've not even seen. I thought Sneakers was a movie about a hacker. About a kid who gets shoes who can play basketball. That's like Mike, brother. That's like. Have you seen like Mike? Motherfucker, if you're lying about not seeing like Mike,

I'm going to be upset. I have seen like Mike. Yeah, I've never. I don't even know what this movie's about. You should watch it. It's it holds up. It's super good. It's about like hackers.

Wait, basically it's about a team of people who are hired by like a company to see if their security is up to snuff because they're the guys who can break in. Yeah. But usually movies about hackers from the early 90s are the technology was so dumb. They have rollerblades. This is more than hackers. It's actually like breaking into and like infiltrating corporate espionage. It's more like Ocean's Eleven.

OK, yeah. Let's give our flowers to the movie Sneakers, which evidently is a cultural touch. Adam, literally there's an episode of workaholics called Snackers, where we started writing it off of the movie Sneakers. I know. And I'd never seen Snackers. I just was like, you guys were like, yeah, snacks,

and we have to find ways to get the snacks. I'm like, yeah, it's a heist movie. I got that. And Adam just kept nodding his head like, yeah, yeah. River Phoenix. River Phoenix. Using that. Yeah.

Lil' Bow Wow. Lil' Bow Wow. And when he puts on the sneakers, it's a wrap. So what snack makes me jump really high? Oh, my god. Like, Adam, that's not. Guys, it's not a man. No, no, I'm joking.

I'm joking about the sneakers. But when they are sneaking. They get sneaky. That shit. Do we even say in that episode, my voice is my passport? Verify me. I kind of feel like we threw to that. Probably.

If we did, it got cut. Oh, it's not. My snacks are my passport. That didn't make it. Yeah. Too much plot for TV, baby. You should check it out. It's got an all-star cast.

It's very smart. It's cool. It's a fucking, I don't know. Would I say it's a classic? You would. You would. I think it's an underground classic, for sure. Yeah.

Yeah, you would. The likes of. That you feels pretty loaded there, Kyle. You would. You would. Yeah, Kyle. Kyle can name the seven movies he's seen on one seven finger hand. I know.

Bullied. The first, first, first, that's like. And then they're all die hard. Half of them are die hard. What? The movies they've seen? They're just all die hard movies. Have seen die hard?

With a vengeance. Well, Derz is classics. I'm saying that is not like loaded like fuck you. I'm saying like, yes, you would call that a classic because you reference it so much. It's a Derz classic. Just like Daryl is a Derz classic. Daryl is a Derz classic.

These are movies that I don't know that I would have seen without having you as a friend. Sneakers is a movie that you see that makes you feel smarter, right? Which I think is a lost art. I think it's a genre that we don't get enough of. Oh, God. No, but like it's clever. It's a clever movie and you watch it

and you feel like you're a smart person. It's well written and it has a cast that is absolutely legendary. And usually that makes you feel smarter when you watch it. Legendary mate. I guess I don't have. That's when Derz was like, I guess I don't have to read or. Or tell time. The book report.

I guess not being able to read. Hunters, can we talk after class? You wrote a book report on sneakers. Yeah, bitch. Call me Sharpay. I'm out. Send Mr. Lobcher's huge potato balls up in here. Bonswa from Sharpay.

Did you guys have any memorable substitute teachers that like you you can recall? Yeah, we've talked about Mr. Tan. Oh, is that chef? Well, I don't know. I don't know what his real name was, but like we had a dude who had like a Polish, you know, you're in Chicagoland.

You got a bunch of dudes with crazy long Polish names that are like, you know what? Just call me Mr. Tan. And this dude in the dead of winter was straight leathery. Yeah. And it was like his whole thing, like his whole identity was wrapped up in his skin cancer. And being tan.

Like that's fantastic. Yeah. And to this day, it's evolved. It's evolved. That's tan fast. Yeah, substitute teachers were were a weird mixed bag because a lot of times you're like, Yeah, yes.

Do they either you're like, oh, this guy is a degenerate who just is doing this for a few extra bucks. Or it was cool. Not even a degenerate. This dude is a drug dealer. I mean, honestly, I'm going to buy weed off this guy. I mean, honestly, the period ends for sure. Or or it was a retired teacher.

Someone that was so nice and so cool. But something was a little off that made it feel like that. Maybe that's why they couldn't get higher. They didn't wear underwear. They couldn't get higher. See the ridgeline by full time balls the size of potatoes. Honda Ridgeline poking through.

I weirdly remember like a bunch of substitute teachers. We had a guy who played in the NFL, who like just took the whole class to tell us what it was like to be in the NFL. And he was like, dude, I remember my first game. I got laid the fuck out. And I was like, I got to quit this. And he became a fireman.

That's what a substitute teacher should be. That's why it was so great having one of those fucking loony tunes in your classroom. Because they never cared. They weren't going to teach you anything. They were just going to tell you a cool story that they tell every class. Or they're just going to put on Hoosiers

and call it a fucking day. Oh, Hoosiers. If they really like stuck to the syllabus, like that the teacher left, then you were like, fuck this person. This person is not. The fucking spell syllabus. I won't even know.

Oh, boy. Is it start with an S or a C? Oh, boy. Start with an S. No, it's an S. I was kidding. It's a PS. It's PS.

OK. S-Y. Psyllibus. Psyllibus. Psyllibus. Psyllibus. Psyllibus. Psyllibus.

Psyllibus. Psyllibus. Psyllibus. Psyllibus. I remember there was this one, what was wild is, we would get this one substitute teacher. And I think he just would say, just call me Josh. But he was an alumni.

That guy was trying to fuck. Yeah, that's what we need. He was an alumni from our high school, and he came back to teach our high school. That's a trip. Well, that's cool. I like what people do that. We had a bunch of X wild kits that taught at our school.

Dude, you guys, I have blocked this. I blocked this shit from my brain, but my mom's. No, my mom was a substitute teacher. Uh-oh. Do you remember that shit? Oh, god. Oh, god. Take back what I said.

Yeah. Dude, that was so rough. Do you remember that shit? Oh, yeah. That was so rough when the kid in class would have their mom come in and teach. I don't remember your mother being my teacher. My mom did it for probably two years.

I forbid her. I was like, you're not teaching anything on my grade. Love that. She was on campus, but she was not allowed to teach my grade. She had to say no to those classes, because it drove me bananas. So did your mom have a degree in education? Sweetheart, she had three degrees.

Yeah, my mom went back to college. My mom graduated college when I was like eight years old. She went back and did that when I was a young kid. Was it in education? She must have gotten whatever you need to be a substitute teacher. Was it a third degree burn? Because sometimes I feel like you don't even need. So you need a certificate to teach, yes.

Do you? Yeah. Yeah, teaching certificate. Well, now I don't know about that. Substitute teacher, I don't know. You need a teaching credential. Yeah, see, that's what I think. I think you take one night class, and they're like, it's fine.

Just show them Hoosiers. Just they're going to watch Rudy. Just get in there. We need someone to look after these fucking Rugrats. Hoody and Hoosiers. Hoosiers. Am I wrong? But it's like substitute teaching is a way of getting your hours.

OK, dad. Like you have to substitute teach a few times to be an actual teacher? Am I tripping? Yes, and I think maybe even to get insurance coverage, probably. At the same time, you're poisoning teachers to get jobs. You're hitting teachers with cars to get work.

You're taking them out. Have you seen the movie 187? And then you book the full-time job, and then they're coming after you, but you know it. That's the movie I got to write. The substitute. It's called The Substitute. Yeah, that's the movie.

Hey, we've already seen that movie. Shout out Beringer. Great movie. Beringer? Fuck yes to Beringer, bro. Fuck yes to him. Fuck yes. Well, he's the catcher in Major League.

He's the catcher, right? He is. All right. OK. The circle's not bad. He is. He's in Major League. He's actually kind of the main character of Major League.

The catcher is the main character. Oh, yeah. His knees are going out. What do you mean, kind of? Isn't he? Yeah. His knees are going out. He doesn't know if he can catch anymore.

That's big deal. That's right. And he kills it. And then he was also in Sniper? He was in Sniper. Sniper? Here's a little factoid. My wife's ex-stepdad was an actor in Major League.

He was one of the sports executives. What? Oh, my. What? Shout out Jack McLaughlin. Wow. Jacky. That is so dope.

That's a strong name, too. How did he not become a fucking monster superstar with a name like Jack McLaughlin? He's a superstar. His nuts were too big. His nuts were too big. He was a Chicago theater actor. And last winter, during the holiday season,

or maybe it was a Super Bowl. No, he was in a Super Bowl commercial. That's right. There you go. That's the top. That's the top. Flowers for Jack. He was the old man in the commercial for like a bookstore

like was closing down and all the community came down to help raise money for the bookstore. And I think it was like Toyota or some shit. And that was a Super Bowl commercial. Yeah. Let's just say my man is not fucking around. Hell yeah. Hell yeah.

Get you some. Get you some, Jack. I don't like that. What was up with all the baseball movies being shot in and around Chicago? Because you didn't like Cubs. You got the Cubs. Cubs.

It was a whole history. It all revolved around the Cubs. So on Best Stadium to shoot in or something? History. Wrigley is pretty cool. It looks run down. Yeah. It's the right amount of.

Yeah. If you're ready for it to collapse on you. It was the right amount of kind of shitty that you're like, oh, there has to be history here. There must be. There has to be. You're telling me the only history is people just kind of they would demolish it.

So they must have won like 30 world championships. Right. It's been a long time. Have a 100 years or so. Actually the most losingest team in history. Yeah. Very bad. Very, very bad.

That's why it was so rusty in the 80s. Like I haven't been there 20 years. Like I don't even know what the fuck it could look like now. Maybe they've given it a little polish, but man. I bet they've they've judged it since winning the World Series a couple of years ago. Just it, baby. And they give it a good judge.

I think they try not to judge it. I think they're pretty like kind of like with the A's like let it rock. Do you remember Dodger Stadium before Magic Johnson like took it over however many years ago? That was six or seven years ago. It was real bad. And then they did a little judge.

And now it's much better. It's just a judge, like a whole remodel. I like that. Okay. Yeah. People were getting murdered, right? Or like or left for dead. Yeah.

People were getting murdered in the parking lots. Yeah. Specifically Giants fans. Yes. Specifically Giants fans. Fuck. Yeah. There was also like seats that were behind pillars and shit

that you couldn't even see from them. Oh no. But were they cheaper? Probably. But there was like also there wasn't like screens everywhere. So even if you were in those bad seats, you couldn't like look up and see his screens. They put a screen on the pillar.

So yeah. So it's just you watching TV. That'd be tight. I'd do that. How do we feel about the like netting? How do you guys feel about the netting that should or should not be put up alongside so like babies aren't getting beamed by line drives?

I like them. Like you like the Nets? You like the Nets? I like the Nets. Okay. He likes babies. Because I see multiple people. I've seen multiple people get taken out in stretchers.

I think we were together one game when we saw someone get taken out in a stretcher and Magic Johnson like went up and shook their hand. That's when we threw the wheel down. Yeah. Hope you don't die. You guys were there. It's when we were through the first pitch out. That's right.

And we did that dumb bit where not even dumb fun bit where we acted like we were fighting to who would throw the first pitch. You guys actually really sold it too. I think you guys were kind of actually fighting. Yeah. You tackled the hell out of it. Truth and comedy. I'm not a fan of the Nets.

I would rather go back to the bring your gloves and protect your fellow next year. You know what I mean? But you can't. You can't protect yourself. It's impossible. It's so fast. It's impossible. Bullshitters.

What do you mean? Everybody should have a gun. What are you talking about? Wait, what do you mean? You can't protect yourself. Now we're talking. Now we're talking. Now we're talking.

That's not what I was talking about. Yeah. Hey dude, if he hits you in the face with a ball, you pull out that gun. Yeah. When I was a kid though, I felt a great responsibility bringing my mitt to the game. Good. And what I'm telling you is that on top of that responsibility, you can't.

It's coming at you at 120 miles an hour and your reaction time. What? You can't? Well, they only have the Nets to like the third and first base. I can't catch a baseball? No, Kyle, you can't. Kyle. The fuck are you talking about, bro?

On the sidelines, you can catch that. OK, Kyle, you must admit that there is a probability that you won't. OK. If it's a pop-up. There's not enough me's in the audience. I agree with that. Kyle. If there was enough me's.

I guarantee you. There's not enough of baseball stars who didn't play on their high school baseball team. Who chose to smoke cigarettes. Yeah. The future Hall of Famers who chose not to play in the ninth grade. Yeah, that's where you get to showcase your skills, bro. Did you even play in eighth grade, Kyle? Did you play in eighth grade?

Yeah, I stopped in high school. I was traveling all-star team in eighth grade, OK? Traveling all-star team, baby. Did anybody try and convince you to stay on the team? Were they like, we need you? Or was it kind of radio silence? Oh, don't pull this rug out, Derz. Don't pull this rug out, dude.

Yeah, did the coach call you or? No, Kyle could have made it. Don't pull this rug, dude. Hey, no, no, no. We know he can't. No, it's cool. They can talk. It's fine.

Oh, Kyle would walk by baseball practice and be like, but you guys wish you had me. And they're like, who is that? This is my multiverse, you know what I mean? This is my multiverse. And it's all good if you explore it, because that's what multiverses are put there for, to explore. So wait, did anybody reach out to you

to get you to stay on the team? Yeah, did the coach call you even one time to be like, we need you? Yes, yes, dude. I was a hot first baseman. I was on the traveling all-star team. Hot, like he wanted to fuck. I was fucking good, bro.

Still put me on first base. I'm not going to let anything get by me. That's not going to happen. OK, I can run all the plays I can do that. You got that long frame. You can't run the bases, though. I didn't need to hit. You don't need to run the bases fast

when you're hitting home runs, playboy, when you're a power hitter. Put me in number four, all right? Clean up. God damn. Yeah. This is turning me on. Kyle's not wrong.

He was a hot first baseman. And why did you quit? Because you had to practice every day. To, like, get better at the thing you liked? Yeah, you had to practice every day. I did not want to do that. I wanted to hang out with my friends. And probably at that point, I had found the video camera

and I was making shit, and I was falling more towards art. Did you like any of the baseball players, or was it just kind of not a vibe for you? I loved them. They were great. They were cool. They were my teammates. You couldn't film them?

But it did start to get political. It did start to get to be like you had to be a coach's son to, like, kind of make it. It's political. Substitute teacher's son. It's political. There was a little bit of that. My dad wasn't a coach, but for sure, yeah.

Who, you? Did you play baseball? No, I did another sport. What sport? It's called swimming, bitch. That's not a sport. Oh, shit. Oh, what is it?

Guys. That's not a sport. That's exercise. Guys. That's exercise. Yeah, that's just, that's conditioning. You were like a pro conditioner. Oh, guys.

I'm just saying. And let me ask you this. When the Olympics come on, are you watching baseball or are you watching swimming? There's, you know how much I love swimming, spinning, spinning. What are we talking about the politics? I guess I just don't know if you're good. No, no.

It was like coaches, it was coaches' sons, especially when it came to the All-Star team. It was like, I remember being like, dude, what's going on? Every single player is a coach's son from different teams. So it was starting to be like, but I could see the marionette thing happening. I could see that.

Adam's going to say what I'm thinking. Do we think that because, I mean, it makes a lot of sense that the coach's sons would be pretty fucking good at that age, especially before you're growing super quickly. Yeah. But when you take a third baseman, when you take a, let me talk. Because they've practiced, hang on, but they've practiced with their dad every day.

They get good coaching from the head coach. Constantly at home, yeah. I remember specifically, they took a third baseman who was not a first baseman and threw him on the All-Star team as first baseman. Do you remember his name? I'm not going to say it. Say it.

No. Awan Leather. No, but I remember this situation. Who was it? What are you talking about? I remember my baseball bully. I remember his full name. He's not a bully.

He just, say his full name. Say his name. He just wasn't a first baseman. Say his full name, allegedly. Say his name, Blake. Say his name, allegedly. He was a great third baseman. Great third baseman, not a first baseman.

Say his name. Switch me out with that first baseman. And that's when I realized this is not. Dude, Kyle's fibbing right now because he's not saying his full name. Are you making him up? Right now. Whatever, bro.

You want the story? Oh, I thought I was going to say it. Here, Kyle, as soon as you say it, all this stuff that you're holding in right now, it's going to be out, dude. You need to get out. I'm not holding anything. I'm just letting you guys know the story.

You are, dude. I'm watching you. I'm listening. I hear your voice quivering. You need to say his name. Well, you're trying to push me to do something. I don't want to do. So that's the actual thing that's underneath this.

And what is that? And that is call out this child. I don't feel like calling out a real person for this. Something that happened 30 years ago. We're talking about what? Blake, you said you had a bully. Call yours out. I do have a bully.

I'll talk about him right now. Call him out. What's his name? Anybody who used to watch baseball knows that this name has even more relevance. But there was a guy on my team named Will Clark. Fuck him. Fuck Will.

He was on my team. That's the first baseman of the San Francisco Giants, too. And he was fantastic. Yes. But this kid's name was Will Clark. And he was on my team. And when I would go up to bat, because I wasn't. But he didn't grow up to be the first baseman

of the San Francisco Giants. No, he's not Will. He's not the Will Clark. Imagine the chip on that guy's shoulder, man. Come on. Give him some slack. When I would go up to bat, and he was on my team, I would hear him say, oh, here comes another out.

My own teammate. That shit stuck with me, bro. Yeah, that happens, bro. I feel like that's baseball. Yeah. That's baseball. That's what you do. That's my teammate, man.

I know. But I feel like that's baseball. Did you strike out and get out? Were you a good hitter? I think you had a little bit of a thin skin situation. What do you think? He shook me to the core. I, of course, I struck out.

But before that, did you get hits a lot? Like, or no? I think Blake might not have been. I was a stronger fielder. I was a stronger fielder. Oh, my God. That was so bad at baseball. In sports, there is like a real talk, you know what I mean?

But I was also a child. I was, this is developmental stage. All right. We didn't want to ruffle your feathers. Poor guys. My God. No, bro. As you get older, you become a better batter.

I had no strength. I was afro fetus. I was just a child, man. I know. So was he. So was he. Let's cut him some slack. Is afro fetus a t-shirt?

But why was he so mean? Bro, he's a kid. I'll say your guy's name. I don't need to. You're saying your guy's name. I'm not saying my guy's name. Hi, I'm David Eagleman. I have a new podcast called Inner Cosmos on iHeart.

I'm a neuroscientist and an author at Stanford University. And I've spent my career exploring the three pound universe in our heads. On my new podcast, I'm going to explore the relationship between our brains and our experiences by tackling unusual questions so we can better understand our lives and our realities. Like, does time really run in slow motion

when you're in a car accident? Or can we create new senses for humans? Or what does dreaming have to do with the rotation of the planet? So join me weekly to uncover how your brain steers your behavior, your perception, and your reality. Listen to Inner Cosmos with David Eagleman on the iHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Last season, millions tuned into the Betrayal podcast to hear a shocking story of deception. I'm Andrea Gunning, and now we're sharing an all new story of Betrayal. Ashley Lytton was helping her husband set up a business Venmo account when she discovered a terrible secret. I scrolled down, and that's when I saw a hidden folder,

and I opened it. What the hell did I just see? I was scared that he was coming home. What Ashley discovered that day was a secret so dark she feared for her life. She was like, oh my god, I gotta get out of the house. He's gonna find out that I've seen this, he's gonna come kill me.

Listen to season two of Betrayal on the iHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If you're looking for someone to help you unpack Queen Charlotte a Bridgerton story, you're in the right place. It's me, Gabby Collins. Come with me, because on Queen Charlotte,

the official podcast, we're stepping behind the scenes and the drawing boards of this team to experience the life breathed into the Bridgerton prequel. Listen to the leaps executive producer and series director Tom Verica took to capture the feeling that's put that lump in your throat. And you've got to catch creator Shonda Rhimes.

She's dropping gems, diamonds, and mics. On this podcast, we're going beyond the basic line of questioning and getting to the heart of the show, all while appreciating the contributions of the show's creative teams and remarkable cast. Go inside each episode of Queen Charlotte a Bridgerton story with the creatives, the cast,

and creator Shonda Rhimes leading the way. Listen to Queen Charlotte the official podcast, Thursdays on the iHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or anywhere you get your podcasts. Dude, I have another deep-seated thing. I remember my bat. Yeah, all right. My bat, instead, it specifically said it was a t-ball bat.

It was neon green. It said t-ball. Well, okay, like, get a proper bat. They're going to make fun of you, dude. Will Clark saw the bat. He's like, look, his bat says t-ball. Well, yeah. And fucking shook my shit, bro.

My mom crossed it out with marker so that fucking dude wouldn't make fun of me no more. Oh my god. Buy this kid a new bat, dude. God damn. He wasn't big enough to hold a heavier bat. Who knows? Oh, poor guy.

He couldn't swing a heavier bat. Well, Blake, I feel like you had some thin skin. This kid was giving it to you a little bit. He probably was a little bit of a shithead, but. He was on my fucking team. He was on my fucking team. Yeah, I know. That's fucked up, dude.

Guys on my team. I know. Bro, so take me aside and say, like, hey, you want to do some fucking workouts. Dude, the kids on my baseball team, I came back after my accident and tried to play baseball again in the seventh or eighth grade. I obviously was the worst.

My teammate called me the cripple. Yeah. That's sports, man. These kids, man. And they were right. He's fucking kids, man. I laughed about it because I did suck. Your name's hard to remember.

I did suck. And I was crippled. And I was a liability every time I went out there. And I got it from their point of view. But also, hey, I like to play. So I was giving it a go. Yeah, but don't you think you might have would have had a chance to be better than you were

if they were like, yo, bro, we back you. Fucking get up there. Well, I physically couldn't run around. Your story is a little different. They're kind of wheeling you out and putting you by the third base coach and saying you're playing, but you're not actually playing. But Blake.

But Blake, Blake, Blake, Blake, Blake, Blake. But you're really good. I'm caught, John. Let's just, I mean, let's just go to another sport real quick. You were, I'm going to build you up because you're my team. OK, I'm a guy. OK, thank you, sir. Pickleball.

Because you were good at soccer, like really fucking good at soccer. I certainly had. Guys like me, I couldn't play soccer. I was not fast enough. I didn't have the wind. OK, I'm a 40-year-old pickleballer. You were smoking ciggy.

And so you were really good at soccer, Blake. So you played in, you played in high school and maybe got it. Yeah, I was all-star. I was, I was select. I was selecting my when I was traveling. But here's my thing, Kyle. That's sick. You played in high school soccer.

I did not know this about you. No, he did not. No, he didn't. No, he didn't. Oh, wait, wait, what? No, I wanted to fucking record videos with Kyle on smoked cigarettes, bro. I dropped.

Nobody wants to practice. Oh, OK, all right. See, we both dropped around the same time. Yeah. And that's fine, too. You know, you can do all that stuff. I get that, too. I get that.

You could do all of it. I did the comedy show. I was on the swim team. I smoke weed. You could, yeah, you could do it all. You can't do it all. Ders, we didn't know. We didn't know, man.

No, man, there's a fork in the road. You're either fucking smoking ciggies or you're playing sports. All right. Well, mine wasn't that. It was politics. That's what it was. It pissed me off, dude.

Save your name. Save your name. I'm not saying your name. So coach's sons, man. Oh, wow. Dude, what a coincidence. All the coach's sons are on the traveling All-Star team. Blake, you quit soccer and then did you miss the sport?

Did the sport miss you? Did you get a call from the coach saying, hey, man, what are you doing? We need you. Well, my stepdad was my coach. But so, Kyle, how do you feel about that? We got one of these guys. And that was that was the sport that you excelled in?

That's incredible because you are the exact. You are you knew we're so fucking good, dude. Yes, you were good. You were good. And you and you had the you had that piece of the puzzle. You had a dad that was a coach. Would you position were you? I don't know soccer too well.

Bull back. I played defense. So that's a lot of running. But then, yes, yes. But then as you kind of age up a little bit, full back sort of fades out. There's like, you start to be a sweeper. So you cover the whole field, cover the whole field. Because I was kind of I could see that for you.

Did you do a lot of like, this is my house. Like, get the fuck out of here. Let's go. You started. Let's go. You were the first one to start that whole phenomenon. Let's go. Let's go.

I got I got some cool soccer foot. If you see the kid who I'm talking about me at this age, you'll be like, oh, my God, I look like I like your swim photo the best on the ladder. After that. So I have the Afro starting to go. Oh, my gosh. I look like I look like a gymnast, a little girl gymnast.

It's really cute. Yeah, you do. So it goes back to the fencing. OK, because that's where this this started, right? Yes. The fencing in baseball. Oh, right. Yes.

And we absolutely you. You were convinced that you shouldn't have it. Even though I know you're asking my opinion of it. You're asking the net. The net. Yeah. I know, but Kyle, so then people who can't defend themselves shouldn't be sitting there is what you're saying.

Well, you do get a chance to pick your seats, so you you don't have to sit there if you're not ready. That's what I'm saying. So would you recommend like, hey, look, if you can't take the heat, get out of the kitchen. Go to the bleachers. I guess I'm just I get it. I'm just saying it's I like to drink at baseball games.

Sure. Double fist. And I and talk with my friends. And it's part of the bait. Obviously I'm watching the game, but it's a lot of bullshitting with my friends catching up with people. I'm not paying attention to the mostly that it's mostly

being gauged for three hours. The four or five hours that this fucking game is going on. I'm kind of like put up some nets. Right. See, I love I love watching it. Baseball stadiums are just bars with a thing happening in the middle of it. Wait, you don't like the sport.

You don't like the actual sport. Kyle, say you go with like a younger audience, say children, and you're having to monitor them. Now all of a sudden you're on the third base line. No, no, I mean, I wouldn't do it. Are you engaged? Wouldn't bring them. No, I think that I'm just basically speaking out of like

nostalgia, I guess, in my own upbringing, where I'm like saying where I'm like, I'm like, I enjoyed that part. Yes, it was it was thrilling when the ball would come to your part of the stadium. Well, I enjoyed bringing my glove to the game too when I was a kid, but you could do that in the outfield or anything past third base or first base. The netting isn't up.

Still a pop up will come that way. Yeah, I understand why it's there. I get it. I understand why it's there. And I guess all the people who've had like fucking damage done their craniums. Yeah, Kyle, I thought you were wanting for the people. Yeah, yeah.

No, I get it. I get it. I get it. No, I'm I'm I feel you. I was like I said, I was speaking out of my own history, which is not necessarily the most progressive form of thought. OK, I'm I'm down with with the progress. I'm down with this.

Protective. See, normally I'm I'm always that way. Whenever there's change or anything new, I'm always like, fuck that. Right. You said that right. Always better. And that's, I think, an easy thing for humans to do

because you're just thinking about your own upbringing and you're like, well, it's different. And I why I had to do it like that. Yeah. So everybody should have to do it like that. But it is a very close minded way of thinking. And we're really evolving, aren't we? As a friendship family, look at us go.

Here's here's how Kyle's going to evolve. Immediately after this episode, he's going to go start a net company and just be ready to go and be like, I'm the official net provider of the MLB. Look at the gears turning. When those pickleballs start to start whacking some some fans in the in the stands, it's actually made of pickleball nets. And the technology is such that the ball will bounce back into play.

I am surprised at how long it took baseball to put nets up. I can't really remember it without them, but I am glad they're there. Where are they? Because I don't, are they really up? Yeah, they're up behind the home plate. Behind home plate makes total sense. That's always been there. Behind the home plate, obviously.

And that's that's where it always was. I'm not talking about that. But then all the way to past a little past third base, I think. Yeah. And I wonder how tall they are. I think they're pretty tall. It's just so you don't get a direct, you can have a little time. Yes, I know.

People are on their cell phones. There's people that are getting fucked up at NBA courtside games. I know. They're looking at their phones. Yeah, which those are hilarious. Those are hilarious. By the way, those are going to go away as well. Courtside seats are going to disappear.

Once someone just like, it almost happened at a Lakers game or some game, a player is going to run into a pregnant woman, kill her baby, and there will no longer be courtside seats. No, no, because each one of those courtside seats are obviously a pregnant woman. That's not a person. That's a unborn. Okay. Let's get into it.

They're not going to get rid of that because that's the most expensive ticket in basketball. And the owners aren't going to go, oh, we're just going to not make an extra $5 million every game. If LeBron James plows into an 80 year old couple and kills both of them, there will no longer be courtside seats. That is not true. That's true. That's true. That's true.

That's not true. Yes, it is. That is not true. Yes, it is. What I will say to Blake's point, if I may, to Blake's point, if it's difficult for you to get an abortion in the state you live in, you can just, it's a little more expensive, but go sit courtside at an NBA game and just kind of sit with your belly out and they'll get it.

They'll give you a little. That's freaking dark comedy right there. I feel like if you can't afford to travel somewhere to get an abortion, you might not be able to afford the courtside seat. Adam, you're missing my good point. Okay. And that is that this is a twofer. That's dark.

That's dark. You get to go to the game and then also take care of your business. It's a twofer. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I get it. It makes sense to me, but I'm just saying, you know.

Yeah. I'm just trying to make a good point. Any takebacks, apologies, flowers, giveaways. Candy critiques. I have an epic slam for none other than Will Clark. The famous Will Clark, but the little kid Will Clark. You snuffed out what I may have become because I started to doubt myself.

It trickled into my life today. I'm still holding it. Yeah. I think we know our second guest. Yeah. Will Clark. Will Clark. Oh, yeah.

I'm from Concord, California. I think your dad's name was also Will Clark. Also not the San Francisco giant. Oh, wow. So this is a guy who was living in the shadow of his father. And he took it out on you. Yep. Yeah.

I'm sorry, dude. That sucks. And it affected me. And I'd love to talk to you. And I would love to know who Kyle's guy is. I feel like why don't you know, Blake? How do you not know who it is? I'll call you afterwards.

I'll let you know, man. It's cool name. I don't know. Cool name. Okay. Let's start going through the cool names, Blake. No, Blake doesn't know. Chuck Stake.

Blake doesn't know who I played baseball with. He was playing soccer. See, he wouldn't even tell me. Yeah. Wow. Secret secrets. I would like to give flowers to Kyle for... Cruella de Vil.

No, was that this episode? Damn, I dropped out. It feels like yesterday. All right, I'm sorry. Sorry, I just wanted to call it back. No, I would like to give him flowers for standing up for himself for his baseball, even though we don't know where his skill set is now,

because he hasn't played in over 25 years. Got a hammer. So 25 years ago, I liked that you stood up for... We were kind of trying to give you shit. Don't let us take that away from you. If you believed in yourself at that age, continue that belief, my man. Thank you.

I love that for you. I wish I had that belief. Will Clark took that from me, so thank you for having it for yourself. Shut up, bitch. I went into a batting cage not too long ago, a few months back, and it was humbling. What do you mean?

What speed are we talking about? I set it to 75 and was just like, nah. Yeah, you got to turn on that quick. Yeah, I was like, oh no, I think I suck now. I used to be okay. Anything up over 60 is tough. In a batting cage, because you can see a person kind of winding up to throw,

so in a batting cage, how do you... How do you time it with the ball dropping? The ball goes... Yeah, a green light turns on. Yeah, you get the rhythm of the ball drop, basically. And then you... Kyle, I've been swimming lately. Have you ever thought about going back

into just doing adult league baseball or softball? Yeah, I would. God, that would be sick. You know, I've thought about it. I think about it a lot, and I think it would be good. I think it's a no. Yeah, but I'm into pickleball now, dude. I'm into pickleball.

I know, I know, but I get that. I'm high level. I'm at a high level in pickleball right now. I'm happy. And we're excited for you. You're at the very beginning of a burgeoning sport. Who said what? Who said you're at a high level?

I mean, just watch me play with other people that are good. Burgeoning. Adam, you can't... So this is the second week in a row that Adam is just doing lines from the movie that we're hoping to save. Dude, I just read the workaholic script, and I like it, dude. I like it. Do not blow the wad.

You can't workshop it, man. Boiler alert. Hey, I'm workshopping the bits, baby. Burgeoning. Let me do my best. All right, all right. Any takeaways? Epic slams?

Yeah, Kyle, I want to see you get out there. I'm happy to get out there, man. I'd be happy to play ball with you all, and I know I'm the best one here. I feel like you'll find the love again, because everyone whose dad got them to play whatever position, the dads are dead now. Will Clark senior is dead.

There is another thing, though. No one is there to stay in your way. The politics won't be there, Kyle. It'll just be best man standing. Even as you're talking about this, though, to throw together a softball team, you've got everybody on your team. You've got to kind of like.

It's hella hard. Nine people. Pickleball, you're solo. Swimming, it's you in the pool. But if you're with nine people and seven of them, you don't like. You don't have to like. Yeah, you do.

Dude, you. It's harder. I mean, seven. Yeah, sure. If you hate more than two-thirds of the team. Imagine seven Will Clarks. Fuck that, bro. Yeah, think about this poor kid.

I'm so sorry that happened to you, Blake. That sucks. You were a fragile young lad who couldn't take it, man. All you need are two or three people. To play baseball. Oh, two or three people you like. No, no, no.

Two or three people that you like. And then you're like, that's you. That's you chit chat with in the dugout. That's actually never played baseball. I'm going to go hit the. As a professional, like person on a professional sports team, I wonder how many people you actually like on your team.

Two or three. Yeah, I think that's probably a great metric. Yeah, especially in like basketball. A few. Football may be 10. And then if it's like a weird underdog team that wins a bunch, they probably all like each other a lot.

And it's just clicking. A weird underdog team that wins a lot. Yeah, where you're like, why are they winning so much? And you're like, dude, they like each other. Yeah, they all gel though. The team is really gel mentality. They go to big fund dinners together.

Blake, you're talking specifically 2002 Oakland athletics, huh? Yes, yes. Yeah, you are. You are. That was a special couple of years. Oh, did you guys see that? What was it?

Was it a basketball player or football player where they're like getting blow jobs in the middle of a bar? Oh, that was in Australia. It was it was a way. Oh, Australian League football. That's a classic way. Yo, what is this?

There was some Australian football where like the dude, the teammates bet each other and the dude lost the bet and the loser had to stick in a public bar or something. What? Is that real? I thought it was a girl sucking the dick. I think it was the teammate had to do it.

It's like a very way of situation. Dude, these Australians are way out of pocket. These Australians. What's the name of the sport? One more time. The name of the sport is. Blake is right. Thank you.

Wow. And also there was somebody in the Oakland A's stadium way up in the bleachers getting a blow job. And that was also a way. So way. I was catching on. We've been way out. I was in way.

I guess I forgot what way. Means way for next week. Yeah. Hey guys. Yeah. We just go too far. It's a way over. Tony.

Oh, that's a way. It's a way to sex act. It's a public sex act. Crime punishable by jail time. And I guess that was another episode. And that's another episode of this is important. Stenny. Hi, I'm David Eagleman.

I have a new podcast called inner cosmos on I heart. I'm going to explore the relationship between our brains and our experiences by tackling unusual questions. Like can we create new senses for humans? So join me weekly to uncover how your brain steers your behavior, your perception and your reality. Listen to inner cosmos with David Eagleman on the I heart radio app, Apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.

Last season, millions tuned into the betrayal podcast to hear a shocking story of deception. I'm Andrea Gunning. And now we're sharing an all new story of betrayal. Ashley Lytton was helping her husband set up a business Venmo account when she discovered a terrible secret. I saw a hidden folder and I opened it. What the hell did I just see? Listen to season two of betrayal on the I heart radio app,

Apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Between April 1971 and September 1972, six young black girls were snatched off the streets in Washington DC. This child was laying on the side of the road. The person said I murdered your daughter. The killer believed that he may have been seen. I will admit the others. When you catch me, if you can sign freeway phantom.

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