This Is Important - Ep 111: The Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade vs AVN Awards

Episode Date: November 22, 2022

Today, this is what's important: God talk, Gallagher and Ninja Turtles, The Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade, The AVN Awards, A-Ha, shitting in inappropriate places, pranks on sad people, candy bars, and more. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Welcome to This Is Important, a production of iHeartRadio, the show where we only talk about what is most obviously very crucially important. Today on This Is Important... And I was like, I'm gonna shit on the cop car. I got my 10,000 hours and then come. Funny anal cream pie. I'm starting to chunk, I'm starting to chunk, guys. Let's goooooooooooo

Yeah!! W I G O B Do you guys want some cookies? Yes, I do. I love cookies, I love cookies so fucking much. And let's talk...Should we talk about God this episode the whole time? The big guy went up to the big guy God talk. Did you find him? Did I find him? We're finally gonna do God talk. Thank God one up to the big guy, you know

Should we give a shout out and a kudos Big shout out and a take away to God what a baller wait take away. Well. Yeah, what are you taking away take away and kudos What show are you? Sorry, I'm talking about my other podcast called isn't this some isn't that something We're like the joke is it like the most the stuff we talk about isn't something it's like It is pretty funny clever little kudos for God Kudos, what do you guys do you think what if God was one of us damn a swab like Me that'd be insane like a stranger on the bus trying to find his way home. Damn man. I know how to play that

So speaking of God last week he took Gallagher from us. Yeah, Leo Anthony Gallagher, Jr. Which is his full name. Yes. What is it Leo Anthony Gallagher, Jr. What's his full name Leo? Yeah, he's saying Leo Leonardo is it short Leo Anthony Gallagher, Jr. What's his full name? Was he Italian? I don't know. I don't know. He looked Italian. You guys remember what I said This is why he probably got he that's why he brought Ninja Turtles to us because his name was Leonardo Yeah, he felt it. You know what I mean. He found it on himself. Why do you his name is Leo not Leonardo? But you can extract Leonardo out of that, right?

There's Leo isn't a name. Of course Leo is not a name. It's always short for Leonardo No, it's not. It's short for Leon. It's short for all sorts of stuff. You're you're saying they're just chopping off one letter They're chopping off an N. Is that unheard of? I'm trying to think of another name that does it, but Kyle. Why do you say he brought us Ninja Turtles? What is making you say that? Why do you keep saying that week-to-week? Well, look Teddy Spencer friend of the pod Yeah, and I were we made a movie together and during the time that we were just chilling He was doing a lot of research on Gallagher. Uh-huh as one does. Okay Yeah, just we were going down a Gallagher hole where it was like

Gallagher Gallagher to his drama with his brother and then one of the stories that came out was Kicked it with fucking Eastman and Laird and was one of the first champions of the Ninja Turtle film Okay, what does that even fucking mean? That's not fucking rocket science. Like yeah Yeah, you guys should do a movie cartoon. It was like you should do Cartoon the fucking hit comic book. He's like, what about a movie? No, okay, so hold up because I see I don't think I have it Right, but I think we need to get answers on this and I apologize. I don't have the answer because it might have been the okay Hey, that's alright. No, you brought it up have the answers

Well, it might have been the cartoon what came first. I don't know. I don't know Well, I kind of put it on Kyle, you know, and I'm sorry. I did that Kyle. Yeah Should have known you wouldn't have the answers. Okay. It's fine. It's fine. Go ahead. You can lay into me The cartoon was first the cartoon was way first. What do you mean first before the movie? Yeah, absolutely Let's see what Gallagher's involvement was. Let's go to seeker.com here Check this out. Let's see here. What's Gallagher seeker.com? Yeah, he's a seeker boy seeker and ye shall find now here's the question it will Ron Gallagher his twin brother who Gallagher sued I believe he sued his brother correct

Taking his act and going on the road with it. Yes, right. This is great drama I think he sold him his act and then like he kept doing it past the there was a deal in place I believe go ahead. Oh, okay. It's all so weird. Yeah, I wish I knew more about this Also weird because they looked so similar, right? They they both looked very much So now is Ron gonna go back out on the road. I would in a heartbeat. Is he alive? Yeah I believe so now he's free of litigation so he could actually take the show out. I'll have my long hair lawyers take a look at it. I Know your lawyer. He has short hair dude just for Claire for Claire of for clarity clarification Gallagher got the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie made

Okay, so it was the movie. I don't know but I'm at least zeroing in on that. I'm sorry That was the only clear thing about what you were saying before. Yeah, what do you know Blake said Blake said cartoon? And I said I wasn't sure about cartoon or not. I wasn't sure which one I was I wasn't saying Gallagher got the cartoon made I said it wasn't rocket science to make a movie because there was always already a Humongous hit cartoon. Yeah, if he was just a fan of it and he just were to say Are you trying to dig on me cuz that's us that's falling right off me, bro That's going straight to Gallagher in the grave, man. You're saying what he did was nothing. No, man I'm coming at you brother Gallagher's gone. You're in my sights right now. Okay, but that's not even directed at me

You're saying what Gallagher did wasn't shit and why does that affect me? Are you trying to just eat this off your plate here? I just want to make sure that Blake knows what he's doing is dissing dead Gallagher right now I am not doing that. You are. That's what you're doing. Please don't do that disc dead Gallagher Please don't it's rough. It's rough to hear and I want to make sure that we're clear on what's happening I would never I would never do. Okay. Good. Thank you Trust it. I trust that Yeah, our producers just sent us an article and the headline is G true Hollywood story as in like Gallagher

But like yeah, I'm not reading it based on the headline There was a whole network dedicated to Gallagher and we're just figuring it out G entertainment channel Oh my god, and people might not even know Gallagher is Gallagher They for sure don't right if you know what the word yeet means you don't know You might not know who Gallagher is If you just had to burn 16 pairs of Yeezys you don't know who Gallagher is You want to touch you want to touch that one? I love that they stop selling Yeezys, right? Oh, here we go

But now they're gonna just take the name off of the shoe and still sell the exact same shoe Yeah, correct. That's what it sounds like. I don't think anyone's gonna It's double problematic. Well, everyone knows that they were ugly bad shoes to begin with they were fucking Disgusting. I hated them. Yeah. Yeah, they were terrible. I hate it Okay, guys guys guys I agree except for one pair of the wave runners are sick Okay, but they were Huge for a generation below us. There's no denying that but here's here's the rub for me

Yeah, yeah, they're the dumbest generation. I think a generation of us You're claiming the generation below us is the dumbest generation. Yeah, fuck them, dude No, I'm saying that they like I'm saying that they're not dumb. They like bad shoes Adams Adams on that. Yes, I say they have bad style The weird thing about hanging on to the designs and still selling them is that the kids who still rock with Kanye are like Well, now the name's not on them. So they're not as cool Yes And then the people who don't rock with them are like but they were designed under his name originally so I'm not gonna buy

Yes, right. No one's gonna buy them. What are they doing? So why not just cease production and start on something else cuz they like a money They like of the money they will they will I don't think it's gonna. It's not a strong move. No, yeah I don't think they're gonna do it. I don't think they're gonna make the shoe. Yeah, but the wave runners are sick I think Yeezy's are dead. Well, they are currently making the shoe That's what the big announcement was that they're gonna keep selling them without the Yeezy name, right? But they could do another an announcement. They love announcements. Well, I gotta see it to believe it. Oh, yeah It's a conspiracy theory. I think so

They're actually not making them. No, I actually bought a pair after they're no longer easy. No, not real Those aren't real earth's flat. I do want to hear Blake after watching all the interviews back to back to back to back How is this? What's your take then? What's your take with Kanye? No, no, no Take on what? I feel a little back into a corner You know, I'm about to sing that on the Macy's Day parade take on me Are you wait you're gonna sing that? I thought you were singing move to balloons. I'm singing take on me with a mash-up of 99s

That song is good. I love it both bangers That's a that's exciting news and those are both bangers. Can you hit that high note though for take on me? Yeah, I was gonna ask the same question. No, Sarah Highland is taking that high note. Hello. Oh, wow She's a say I mean, I know she's on the show, but she's also an accomplished singer. That's cool. Yeah, she's great She's like wildly talented at singing. I had no idea because you know like really you just like you're like, yeah Yeah, we have good chemistry. We've worked together before She'll she'll be a great addition to the show right on a little show called bumper in Berlin the the spin-off show I did about my character from the pitch perfect movies fish perfect and

It's pitch perfect and it's coming out November 23rd only on Peacock, I love to Peacock is fucking killing it. That's my favorite streamer right now. Okay. I love I love that You love wow they overtook HBO They're neck and neck okay, but Peacock just has too many funny shows I love what what makes you love Peacock so much Macroober girls five ever bumper in Berlin the Jack night show. Sorry. I can't remember the name of it But that show is super funny bust down bust down. Yeah, super funny Sam J's on there taking big swings, dude Yeah, they're still doing hard comedy. We're like I like that

Yeah, I think that's that NBC is known for like having funny sitcoms. They want to get back to that I think yeah, and they're taking trying to yeah, they're they're taking swings, which is cool Hold on though Adam you you're performing Performing at the Thanksgiving parade like Macy's dude, and it's great. I had no idea. I never on a float I'm on a float. I'm on the peacock flow. That's insane Thank you. Shout out to Lonely Island. There's like an 80-foot giant peacock Floating above me, dude. It's the stage is absolutely insane. There's 3.5 million people along the parade route, which is And then

50 million plus people watch it live, right? Yeah, dude. That is just on in the back. That's cool. I've watched that shit every year It's just yeah, that's wild. I literally have never seen it Yeah, I mean it's saying my family doesn't do it. You just keep it on in the background. It's hilariously kind of weird I mean, I think it's super dope that you're doing it But when you watch it, it's epic and up next we've got this float and they stop and perform and then it's like a Superduper commercial brought brought to you by cotton-el poo poo paper. Yeah I have no idea. I did not know it was such a big thing, but oh, yeah, but yeah, we're doing it huge Dude the Snoopy the MetLife Snoopy. Are you gonna meet?

Yes, dude, I probably will meet Snoopy. Yeah, the MetLife Snoopy dude Kyle He might he might shake his hand Kyle that'll be his story about shaking hands, dude That'll be amazing Snoopy rocks noopy does rock and I'll be like hey, this is a cool cartoon you guys should do like a movie Have you ever thought about doing all live action? Yeah, just to Gallagher. It's another diss to Gallagher and then 40 years from now when I pass away Someone will be doing their version of a podcast. Yeah Yeah, isn't that something takes off do the after the grave. What do you mean takes post death diss?

Yeah, wait, that's what's gonna happen. You get your post death. This is yeah, but it's cool. We're gonna be in New York doing that over Thanksgiving and My family's coming out. They're gonna come they peacock gave me like a hilarious sweet nice Yeah, that is gonna be so funny to see my parents who like hate anything Nice nice I People they're like we don't need this fine without it's gonna be so funny to like order room service and Have my parents look at that bill and be like

They're not gonna leave the room for sure. I'm not signing that no way no well bullshit We're going on a walk to get some eggs. Yeah, I got spaghetti. This is not the cost of spaghetti They've been in New York, right? They've been in New York. They have been in New York, but this is they like it Yeah, and they think it's cool. Yeah, but I think it's heat or no I've put them up in a hotel But this is this hotel that they're putting us up is in midtown and it's like super Like gaudy and yeah bougie bougie is fuck that and bougie which I'm very excited to for them to You know be a part of tell me they're gonna be at the plaza. Tell me no, we're at the palace. That'll be a blast

The palace you're gonna love you're gonna love the way you look I'm gonna come it's all gold everything. Yeah, it's the plaza the plaza is like from movies and stuff, right? No, we're talking home alone too. We're talking home alone to not don't send us in well Let me know when we're talking Dunston checks in Okay, and you know what? I believe is the same hotel that they that they put us up in in the intern. Isn't that right dirt? Yes. Yes Oh, and then there's like the they're putting us in a 2,500 square foot two-bedroom penthouse at that hotel. That's life. So it's gonna be so dumb

That's crazy. Yeah, it's cool. What hotel was Dunston checks in? Hey, Adam, it's really cool. I Don't know Blake. I feel like this is something that you could get on seeker.com and check out I want you to see that shit. Don't you remember we watched the bonus features of that. They said where they shot it It was somewhere. Yeah, Dunston checks in the bonus features. It's Dunston. You keep saying it wrong It's not Dustin actually work with that monkey. You know I'm talking about a game So Blake on our group chat

Just found that they do a porno parody of Kyle show what we do in the shadows. Yes And what was the name of it? It was how we fucking the shadows How we fuck in the shadows No, I didn't I didn't watch it. I looked at I was kind of hoping it was gonna be more character based and more based Like just playing like vampires like So it wasn't really a direct rip from the show Except for the title, you know, and I'm like that's cool. That sucks. That sucks. They phoned it in Kyle

If the money was right, would you direct the like the porno awards, whatever those are called? What are they called the AVNs or whatever? AVNs, would you be the director of the AVNs? I doubt it. I don't cuz I remember like David tell hosted him one year and I was like, whoa, all right I mean, yeah check must have been right. I don't know man live shows are stressful, dude Yes Everybody's watching it's like all my my best heroes are there All these icons of the industry and they're you know, they're gonna be judging

I feel like we missed our way to go to AVNs to go to them I feel like we missed it and we could be right back there if we wanted to Yeah, I think you can loop right back. Yeah, that's easy. That's an easy jog back. We can still go I just don't think it's like as good of a look. I think you're missing my point I think we the window of best of hang on the window of them wanting us to be there we missed But the window of us ending up being there Is very much still in play. It's wide open Wait, did you see fucking Blake from what obviously is seat filling?

He's doing something that's how you got it You have to do the Hollywood minute let people know what a seat filler now. We're back Hollywood minute with Blake Anderson I feel like people already know this one, but basically yeah, see that's because you're so inside. Go ahead Award shows to make the audience look full. They'll have seat fillers in the wing and basically people who are hired for very little money to Sit in the seats of what are you doing stars when they go off to use the bathroom, right? They go ten one they go ten one when they're going ten when they go to take a ten minute Why don't we do like a pop quiz like now if you listen last week and they go to the bathroom?

What are we gonna call that slide into my bm's with your answer? Yes We got to start thinking these things Segments this is what people like no dude as soon as people Realize that we've thought about the podcast even a little bit. They'll smell it This isn't natural dude, they plan the things they have pre-planned Cut to commercials these guys are I'm not looking up the avian award categories, what do we think this is a while there's so many now

They'll give a they'll get you know what everybody gets a trophy everyone Compared to when There's I used to watch it it was like a two-hour program now. Those are like six hours You used to watch it. Yeah, I've watched I've watched it before I've never seen it. You never watch the avian awards No, where do you even watch it at? I think it's on HBO. It used to be on like showtime or something like that Yeah, it was like pretty it was like pretty fun time. I bet yo, there's 100 categories Oh, you got the categories dirt. I got them all. I'm gonna start from the I'm gonna start from the bottom cuz the first ones are like actor actor supporting actor

But then at the bottom sure sure sure sure by the way, I don't know the the 2021 and 2022 winner. Yeah, it's lost. It's loose. Yeah, it's lost the juice You're falling out, bro. I don't I don't know them. Yeah, I've fallen off This is so embarrassing for me that you don't know these people that I don't know You're so busy on your Thanksgiving floats that you completely lost sight of what makes you you This is where we started. Yeah, what's actually important in your life. Oh, I'm sorry this giant corporation That shit's important is putting you up at the palace you and your family up at the palace hotel I need to go back to my roots get on the laptop

Sorry if I'm real quiet. There's it. We've lost dirt. He's so deep Here's let me just I'll say a couple and then I have a legit question like there's milk Okay, the former of the year. Yeah, right. You said milk or milk milk Okay, okay Milking table what whoa best sex comedy best sex comedy. Okay. Well, who's winning that? That's what we need Oh, we fucking the shadows. Let's get it there. Now. Here's a question. Okay, would it be? I know it's probably not a good look, but it would be very fun for us to write a Hardcore porno and have it be the funniest porno that has ever existed and then we would win an avian award

I don't think you realize who you're up against. Have you seen Vencom? It's really funny The Venom parody. I actually don't think you can I don't think you can actually stack up against that I don't think it would work. You don't think we would have a shot. No, no We have a shot. No, I think Adam's right. I think of course we would have a shot I think we would have a shot not even close. Here's an adjacent question to this There there is a best gay solo video, which I assume it's a joe vid It has to be right. Do you think you could put something to get or a plug? This is important really went hard on that

Literally, yeah, no Derz wants to get serious for the first time on Do you think you could make a competing solo video that would actually contend for best gay solo video? No, no, no, these are the best in the world probably not because I I bet you have to be able to dick your Bend your dick back and put it in your own ass. That's what that was my first thought as well But I think you have to even get yes, I bet you have to do like Weird things that we wouldn't even be able to physically be able to do Performance piece this this is a this is a performance piece It's not necessarily about what you can and can't do this is a performance piece

Well, if it's a performance piece, then hell yeah, then I would win and by the way Why is it best gay solo if you're solo? Yeah, how do you what constitutes anything gay about being so what's what's gay? I guess you have to talk about sucking a dick if you talk about sucking a dick. Are you gay or do you actually have to do it? No, thank you. Okay. Good. Good. Thank you. That's not that's not good. I just needed to thank you There's probably some plugging going on. There's probably some like, you know, like some palatio on toys And then there's probably some J. Oh, and I don't know if I'm guessing you don't know Have you seen Dustin checks it I bet he checks he checks out Dustin never checks out

To even think that we could get close to being the winner in any of these categories that you mentioned is Insane, I mean obviously comedy is the one we're going for these are the best in the world Dude, this is like when you guys said that there's literally no way that we could go pro in any sport ever if we dedicated It was something crazy like five years to it Right and and durr's hard stance it and said that there's literally no way that we could do it And it's offensive to people that for professional yo-yoing that we couldn't get that good I actually now I didn't see his point on that until now and now I understand Yeah, this is where you're wrong Kyle because I've been doing this for 41 years

30 years, I don't know. I'm ready. I got my 10,000 hours and then That's true Everyone is like looking at something other like Adam and Durr are looking at shit on their laptops, right? Well, yeah, I've never seen you guys so focused on the podcast Font is very small. It's it's absurd to me that you guys don't think that we would have a shot winning best sex comedy I think we would I'm on your side. Yes, okay, because the comedy. I don't know The comedy we would do very well sex admittedly we we would need some help, but we're all kind of sewers I thought you said kind of sewers. I don't think we need to be performers. We could be producers and writers

We're producers. We're not we're not in it We're on set how you are directing we're at the monitor Hey, and the here. Let's get back. This is a bonus Hollywood minute the monitors are the little TV That's you watch that the cameras are actually filmed you're watching it in real time cameras are not filming the monitors It's the image that the cameras are recording. Yeah, no, they're showing what you're filming so you can monitor what it's filming It's so you can monitor what's being filmed Hollywood minute that was the Hollywood minute There's there's a bunch of weird ones here like best unsung starlet of the year like what does that even mean?

I get that that's like, you know the girl next door type thing where you're like You know what you give her a shot. She's got destroyed on that one. No, no No, I think that's like she's not getting the attention she deserves She's like really putting in yeah, but which is like a weird award to give like well Why not what like I feel like I just said that no you said girl next door, right? Yeah, the girl next door shit, but but like the full-on like poured out like they're sung for no I'm not saying it's a girl's next door. I'm saying this is a person who is really like fucking a lot of people a lot You're saying like the effort like hey, you know, yeah

Like they're putting in a lot of hours and no one's watching their videos It's the unsung starlet of Unsung It doesn't need to be it doesn't need to be girl next door It could you know it could she could be doing some dastardly things No, but I guess I'm just saying like it's somebody who's kind of Like under the radar like girl next door I guess is what I meant under the radar as opposed to like fully out there porn star look at girl next door means something different to me

This is like breakout right like unsung starlet is a breakout. No, I think it could even be someone who's been it's been going on for a while I had unsung is what he's saying. Yeah, well like why unsung because I don't know what is unsung I don't know. Sorry. I can't contribute. Why breakout. What does she need to break out of acne? Oh Yeah, they when you get close some of the some of the acne There's a lot you know what dude directing this this would be a long blicks right this would be long as fuck This is the these are a lot of categories It's a three-hour show the award show has gone so long man. It's just speaking of so long Because so long I had go I don't even know how you would conceptualize this see I'm not the guy for this

No, this is too much Kyle. I feel like you what you know your name's on the shortlist every year to be the guy You know, you know, that's be true. Wow That would definitely change it would be an honor There's one thing I know Just to get the knob The knob just didn't know I was taught The knob yeah, it's not a nod. It's the knob the knob So in a sex comedy though is this the comedy coming from like the actual sex or the things like between the sex bloopers both

Oh, is it just like all every year is just a blooper reel that wins. Oh gosh the blooper your reels are bad No, no, no, I think it's got to be it's got to be funny. It's got to be funny, right? It's funny It's funny scripts. It's like funny script writing. Yeah, where are these pornos? I feel like I would watch more Adam your algorithm just doesn't go there. You'd watch more. I watch more How well you can look up funny on porn hub the gigs in the ha ha the chucks the gigs You can throw funny in there when you're doing a search. I see I don't I don't put in funny He's looking for a chuck in a jail. Come on dramatic. Yeah, I always look up drama blowjobs No, you should definitely start integrating just whatever you whatever you look up like continue to look it up

But just a funny. Yeah, well, no, I normally Funny facial compilation funny gagging. I've usually put in dramatic blowjobs I'm sure dramatic dramatic dramatic dramatic dramatic Oscar funny anal cream pie Now I want to do Roger that I got a 10 Look at the award is two people embracing kissing what standing up. Yeah, the award itself of the avian I like that. I like that embrace of this

You're saying the actual trophy is two people in the trophy is like an abstract piece of art that looks like it should be in a Museum, it's beautiful. It's got two people Like the shape of them made out of gold. They're hugging I'm pretty positive they're hugging and they're kissing at the same time. Okay I'm into this trophy. Oh, wait. Hey real quick. This is news for Adam Because you've told your Peter North story on the podcast, right? Adam moved to LA Recognize a guy thought he was like an actor and it was Peter North of porno fame. Yeah, I'm an act

I'm an actor. Oh, you might recognize me from porno and Adam's like, oh, yeah No, I heard the other day that he was like a switch hitter like he did gay porno and straight porno I didn't recognize him from the other stuff You didn't see Dustin Jackson. It's funny. I just want to know That's solo best solo I didn't I think a lot fascinating because you're like, oh, I know this guy is maybe my favorite penis Solid definitely my favorite come shots. Yeah. Yeah, and he's got this whole other Lifestyle that I didn't even know about other life Admittedly, it's a much worse gig

I feel to be on the male side of it really because you I feel like a lot of those guys have to have to do both You can be way more famous. You get paid way more. Yeah, do you? Yeah? Yeah, I think they do they get paid way more. Yeah, cuz you're like a You're more sought after like I don't care who's fucking these people Like that as far as like the girls. I'm like, oh sure. She's cute. I remember her. All right, cool Just like on the gay side to be like I want to see that guy. I don't care about the guy. Oh, I don't know That's where Blake differs. Yeah, who's your guy then if you don't if you do or don't care you still The last by the way the laugh makes it

That's tripping me out way weirder dude. What's the bald guy? Oh sims Yeah, I'm here, but I don't even know what you guys are talking about at this point. I gotta plead the fifth Yeah, I kind of got lost to are you are you still a beep you be pumper guy? You still a be pumper guy be pumper Johnny Sims I think you know, I think you know How did it go from me singing at the Macy's Day parade to this? Yeah We've got to wholesome it's like you have to have each side if it goes Wholesome on this side. We have to balance that shit out. Yeah, it's like I'm taking my family We're gonna do this funny thing. It'll be it's gonna be so cute. Oh, you know, it's funny. Yeah

Hardcore porno is also so wholesome. I'm gonna hang out with my family Let me take this although I'll circle back to take on me if you go on YouTube and Definitely use secretive find this There's a take on me Acoustic from just a few years ago that like the lead singer from the band does and I thought it was gonna be like not great It's Unfucking believable the dude still can hit the note. So I feel like I might have even talked about before so Was this guy this isn't the basis of weed is Matthew Milligan. No, no, no, I said, aha Todd. Why are you coming at me?

Todd are you coming at me? Did you okay? I don't know if you did. Yeah, sir I don't think you did. They're Norwegian and I look like one of the dudes in it. Do you we'll post that picture right now? It's fucking crazy. Yeah, you do. Yeah, do you? Todd will you Google images aha and then you'll see the guy I look like and the dudes Morton Harkett not the main singer the other dude. It's not Horton market. It's not Morton Harkett Also, what a name dude, you know Norwegians in your names, dude, you guys have you guys got some gnarly Yeah, Morton the fuck is that supposed to mean that's I've never even heard that before that's incredible stakes Okay, this guy looks like me. He looks more like me than I do

Mm-hmm. Who is this? It's a guy from the band aha. Do you think it's is it magna for Holman? You got that name. It might oh shit. It might be my uncle Related oh boy. Well, I like off the rails. Oh, man. I'm starting to chunk. I'm sorry. I'm starting to chunk guys I'm chunking over here. My internet is fucked up. Okay, here we go. Oh Yeah, dude, no no different photo. There's a better photo You do look like this guy, but this looks like a mixture of you And your brother this is a mixture of you and Oli I feel but yeah, you're in this is he's in the fan We'll post the picture for everybody listening. Let me look at this. Let me see this where you guys looking at this shit

It's in the chat. It's the link right there in the chat Blake, you know Oh, we've been doing this for a fucking two and a half years. This is good radio Fuck off, man Yeah, I guess he kind of looks like it's not it's not that it's he looks like you you look like him You guys are the same. I'm telling you there's a fucking photo. That's crazy. I have it right here I just don't know how to share it Show me on your camera. Show me on your camera. Yeah, come on just show it to the camera I can yeah, I'm on the computer that has the camera. Oh

But you thought you had on your phone Early apology over here okay Kyle early I'm chunking early apology. I'm chunking pretty bad You gotta look at this Can you see this? Yeah, I mean yeah, that kind of also looking look at the reflection look at all the porno He has on his laptop. I Mean, yeah, he does look very similar to you. Yes. He looks like he has a stronger job Yeah, you're his job is a little stronger than you We see you in here. You just fine Kyle just left Kyle just left the podcast. We don't know what happens

That's on Anders man. He's scared. Oh, Kyle has to leave so he is pretending to chunk Okay, that's what Anna producer just said that has to leave so he's pretending. Okay now. We're back in our rhythm. Wow Okay, so I think I lost the dead weight speaking. Okay, so who's hungry finally this sports car can get up to full speed It's my birthday or it was my birthday a few weeks ago, and I We are celebrating it now at medieval times tonight. You guys are coming down. We're gonna go to medieval times. Yes I'm excited. I think Zach my friend. I'm doing it as a co-birthday with my friend Chelsea Zach's wife Mm-hmm, and I think they're gonna like let us swordfight or something. We're gonna get it like go down

The fuck up your cable guy Get to Joyce Joost Joost Joost Yeah, you're gonna Joost you're gonna call him You're gonna Joost Chelsea. We're gonna Joost each other. Yeah, I think so So I gotta make sure I strap on the the back brace because this is gonna get violent Yeah, no, dude. Have you ever watched or blue night going down down down down down going down Yeah, we'll see wait. Have you ever seen like jousting like you've been or you haven't been to a ren fair and watched it, right? No, I haven't it's fucking it's intense, dude

Yeah, there's no doubt about it. Well, we'll see. We'll see what I mean You're gonna break your back dude. Oh, dude Remember Andy dick on in cable guys like fucking be careful. I don't think this guy's fucking around Yeah, dude. God that movie's so good. Andy dick base. I don't want to give flowers, but flowers Oh, yeah, that's a really that's a title. I don't want to jinx anything. That's a dangerous flower. Those are dangerous flowers to give Yeah, that's a really dangerous flower. We're scared to give flowers now because it does seem like every time we give flowers someone Parishes every time we mention someone on the podcast. They end up dying. Yeah, it's basically an are you afraid of the dark episode? This is important

Dude, she lived in the basement. When's the last time you guys? When's the last time you guys been to medieval times? It's been like a long durse. Have you ever even been? I've never been because of this somebody So like in seventh grade you got to go and it was like half the grade went the first Tuesday and then the other half went on the thursday, but somebody took like a shit like You know one of those things were like a middle. Yes a middle school rumor I don't know what happened, but somebody took like a dookie in the hallway And then like we didn't get to go we were like banned

In the hallway of medieval times or of your school No, like like not in a bathroom We like took a shit like out in the open or something at medieval times at medieval times. They got medieval with it Oh, dang. Yeah, that seems like that seems like par for the court. It seems like that should be encouraged Yeah, that should be frowned against. Yeah. So we were supposed to go to like abe lincoln's house But some dude like kicked the door abe lincoln's door off the hinges because like a teacher said some shit And then we couldn't go to that either Wait, what was the place abe lincoln? Your school was wild dude. Yeah triflin. Um

Abe lincoln's house like the abraham lincoln house. Oh, no shit. He's from Evanston, illinois. No, no, he's from illinois and we would take like the trip down to springfield or some shit Springfield. Yeah, that sounds real. Yeah What's his house just like a little-ass log cabin or something? I'm sure it's a log cabin But I wouldn't know because somebody kicked the fucking door off there Because somebody kicked it just wild Well, that's cool. I mean, what a cool uh field trip to go on as a kid to medieval times like that's sick Yeah, I mean, it was you know, you're in you're in sixth grade or whatever. Yeah, that's

And sometimes you don't take a shit out in the open. Yeah. Well, admittedly that guy is hilarious Whoever he is. Yeah, he's somewhere He's somewhere killing it for sure. Yeah, you know, he's the funniest guy at whatever office job. He has whatever porno He's filming. You know, it's funny. He's winning. He's taking off the gold taking home gold for sure What's cool is he did it, but I was planning on doing it and I was like, oh man beat me to it. So That uh, yeah, if you guys ever fork in the room anywhere I did one time shit somewhere where I'm not supposed to Okay

Go off. It was it was I think we were like 15 or something or 16. I think we must have been 16 And my buddy was emancipated. So he was fully living by himself living by himself Like his mom wanted to move away and we were in high school And she wanted to move away and she he was just she was like, okay You can live by yourself and he has a shitty little apartment From his apartment window. It looked over the gas station parking lot and a cop pulled up And it was New Year's eve and we're all partying at it, you know at his house And I was like, I'm gonna shit on the cop car. Yeah. Yeah, that's somewhere. You're not supposed to

Like in a church basement or like, uh the Thanksgiving Day parade I I shit in the parking lot and then took a napkin and put it on his windshield And then we and then we all came and we're hiding in the window seal like looking and The look I felt so bad for this poor man You know, you're at that age. You're like fuck cops. They suck. They bust parties and they're you know, they're dicks And now you got a blue line flag, right? Either you have diarrhea or you don't and he came out and he just looked so So hurt by it. It wasn't like he didn't get mad. He was just like his head went down

And he was like it was like I stabbed him or something. It was like he just takes his bad job Adam I like how Adam's like there's gotta be a analogy like I stabbed him Or maybe like you put shit on his car Like it's bad. You don't need to analogize it. It's bad. Yeah, I guess so He had the look on his face like he just discovered a child's shit on his car Like he's hated by teenagers. Yeah, if you ever shot somewhere you weren't supposed to I did it on a cop car Yeah, honey, uh, yeah, I think I did it like on the side of the road one time in my pants, honey

You'll never believe what happened again today I Teenager shit shit on my car, brother. You're misunderstood. Yeah, I Dang, I actually totally forgot about that memory. I'm glad we I'm glad that came up Yeah, I shook that one but man he it really like bummed me out. I wanted him to be like angry, you know No, not angry. I wanted him to be like what the fuck who did this right? But he was just started shooting and pulls his gun. He's just like just started Just takes his gun out and shoots his car up. Where are you motherfucker? I know you're close

It's warm. I wanted him to like freak out, but he didn't he just like looked totally dejected He was like this is my life and I'm yeah, he probably had a hard day This this fucking guy did he pull the gun out and put it to his head and go not worth it. No not worth it Not today Yeah, that always sucks when you like prank somebody and they don't get mad They just get really sad and go it goes dark. Right damn. I just put them down a bad path Yeah, yeah, they're just dejected. What is that? What is that? It's you had a bad day. No, but here's my question. Are they good people?

Because you expect them to go ballistic because you're familiar with people going ballistic But they don't and you're like, oh, you're like a good person Well, it also depends. I feel like I'm the type of person that might go ballistic depending on the mood that I'm in I know that's what I'm saying. That's why you expected it But uh, no, but when I was punked when they brought back right with chance the rapper and they dropped a giant weight On on my car and it like exploded and it wasn't my car They got a car that looked exactly like my car and blah blah blah, but I just they expected me to like lose my mind and I was just like

Right, you were super tired having had traveled or something Yeah, no, I was like I had to leave super early the next day and Chloe to get me to go out a little later. It's like, please just meet my friends at this bar to like set up the punk Uh, I'd like go and hang with her friends and I'm like, I really gotta get up early. Let's get out of here Like I I'm trying to go to sleep. I have a long day tomorrow and she's like, okay And then we go and I'm walking there and now my car's parked in the construction zone and they dropped this giant weight on my car and my car just explodes and I and then I'm caught just saying like

It's gonna be a long night Right tomorrow's gonna suck And I'm just totally dejected. I'm like, oh, this is bad tv after they caught me They caught you on the one day where you would have just gave me the heads up. I would have acted like I was more mad Yeah, I feel like they would have caught you on any other day. You would have fucking flew off the fucking What is it hinge handle handle hinge? Both work Fly off the hinges into term though

No, I feel like it would both work, but fly off the handle is the term Well, I'll take it back fly off the handle fly off the hinge fly off the hinge No one says no one says fly off the hinge people say off the hinges They could off the hinge. They do say off the hinges. They say already you fly off the hook Yeah, but what we're talking about is the saying fly off the handle or fly off I don't know he's off the hinges that you've heard of that term don't make me get websters out It's off the hook I feel like I it in that moment it wasn't

I wasn't angry. I I wasn't angry enough. I feel like in order for me to fly off the hinge or the hook or the handle Or the hinge of the handle I it needs to be like a technology based thing that sure it keeps fucking up and I can't figure it out That's when I'll freak out. Yeah, but if it's like an accident that something happens and my car exploded I'm like, all right. I have insurance. We'll get another car. It just sucks. Right. Yeah You know when you watch uh, jimmy kimmel He does the like halloween candy video every year where the parents the next day go I hate all your candy when you're sleeping. Yeah, kids go fucking. Yeah, I fucking hate you

But then there's always the one kid who's like, that's all right. Did you like it? Like you needed to like you liked it The parent and everyone goes, no, you might be one of those kids, dude. Yeah, but whereas I know Blake is not Then at night that kid fucking watches them sleep and plots their death. That's what Blake Blake thinks that has to play That's how Blake is. He can't just get over it, but I hope you liked it. Oh, I bet you liked it. Yeah, I bet you really liked it Did you like the crackles? Yeah, those are my favorite a little good crack I'm gonna let that one land. Yeah, do crackles exist outside of the little mini. I've never seen a full-sized crackle If you do run If you see a full-sized crackle, it's not a real place where you are. They've set it up. It's for a punk to get out

Yeah, you're being definitely punk. Have you ever seen a full-sized crackle? These are the hard-hitting questions I don't know if I have like a big red crackle. I think it's only fun size. It's only fun size Yeah, because crunch bar crunch bar Brought it right and do you even see full-sized crunch bars anymore? Not really you used to a lot when in the 90s. Oh my god, you couldn't miss them Dude, you could not miss them in the 90s. It was all crunch all day dude. There were some sick ones Do you remember a crunch bars did like an mba series where like you could get all the different mba teams? It was so sick. They used to do they had like the basketball on the cover

Yes, they used to do a lot of cool promos and there was like the net and like the the guy dunking. Yes, it was fire Crunch bars for they did stuff for no, they did it for the olympics. There's like the high top No, they did the olympics too. Like they did all the different sports on the bar the hardwood Fuck off. I'm not lying dude. Crunch bars used to I kind of do remember what you're talking about I because I that was my favorite candy bar as a kid me too. I love Really mean a basketball is my favorite sport. So but then what happened when witch of macaulis came on the scene I never fucked with macaulis. I like I like the commercial, but I never ate it. I fuck with twix What's in macaulis are just better crunch bars. Oh, well, I bet I'd like them. No, it's very different

It has it has caramel. Well, I like caramel. That's the one difference so different No, crunch bars were straight to the point. It's just some crispies and some chocolate. Yep And you could just smash it and they taste it really good when they'd melt now Kit Kat boy as well. Oh, Kit Kat still go hard Underrated let's get flowers Yeah, any flowers takeaways epic slimes giveaways. I'll give you a takeaway I took away all the almond joists from my boys who went trick-or-treating. I said line them up boys. Those are mine Yeah, kids don't really fuck with coconut usually right weird. I always dug them. But yes, you are correct

Yeah, I think most kids don't like coconut. I think that's an adult flavor Or it's like the um texture of it. It's kind of like the same as like onions like it's slicey All right, and I got it to go Wait Just what you're a fucking disaster my guy I'm a man. Wait like what the Okay, please hit it. It's a fucking disaster my guy Wait, you know like there was a reason I you just said that I don't like

Onions, no, no, no, he said almond joy. No Sorry, sorry. I'm enjoying the coconut is like onions. Okay. One of the reasons I didn't like onions as a kid wasn't just because the taste It was like the texture. It's like it had a like a Feeling I don't know how to describe that. Yeah, you sure don't yeah That is apparently. Yeah, you really don't dude You really fucker came with sound He's like, you know how it feels like a noise This dude is mixing up his senses. I see sounds. I see sounds. I'm like Pharrell, bro

So it is a texture thing. Yeah, I think it's a bit of a texture thing. Yes That almond makes up for you get that nice crash. Yeah, no, but then there's mounds. I don't like mounds Yeah, mounds are fucking trash if you eat mounds, you're a child. Which what which ones are mounds? No almonds Almond joys got nuts mounds don't was the whole ad campaign mounds are the same thing Mounds are so it's just it's just coconut without the nut. Yeah, and dark chocolate instead of milk chocolate. Oh Fucking yeah, dude. Fuck fuck dark chocolate super super grown folks candy. I don't even think it exists anymore Dude, I still I can't get on board with some dark chocolate. I bought a dark chocolate weed bar And I'm like, do I just feed this to a like a dog?

Yeah, you saster my god, you could do that. Yeah, do I just feed this to a dog or something? No, it's fucking gross. I'm like, I blew it man Uh dark chocolate is like, yeah, I think it's like the grown up grown folks It's like when you start to get into like coffee. Yeah, but dude, I'm 39 years old now I should I should be on my grown folk shit. Well, fucking get on it in my mind Isn't dark chocolate like super close to what coffee tastes like? Yeah, it's all no, it's all uh, no, I love coffee. It doesn't I know you do and I'm saying doesn't it taste like coffee? It tastes like coffee to me to me. It's bitter. Yes. It's bitter bitter. We're talking about bitter things

And when you when you drink bitter stuff, it's very much like You know when you taste something that's bitter, it's like Ding dong ding dong When you drink a slurpy really fast in your You didn't mean to make a noise The bit is that you say a thing that doesn't make a noise. Then you make a noise I'm chunking. I'm chunking I'm chunking. This has been another episode

The place is another episode This is important And this is important This is really important. Watch watch Adam on this video. Yep. Check me out on pick skipping y'all. That shit's important Watch the avian awards This is important Oh boy