This Is Important - Ep 119: It’s Okay To Be Butthurt

Episode Date: January 17, 2023

Today, this is what's important: Game Over Man fans, dicks, cutting meat, stuff to do instead of making the Workaholics movie, island hopping, old shows, freeze dried food, and more. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Welcome to This Is Important, a production of iHeartRadio, the show where we talk about what's obviously most critically, crucially important. Today on This Is Important. I was not stoked on the idea of a fake cock. Wilbur. Adam Devon, he dips behind islands, whoa. Our wives don't listen to this shit. And here we go.

Oh man, it's been a week. And what a week it's been. Hey, thank you guys for clicking in. Thank you guys for opening up those ears. Alrighty then. Who's watching us on YouTube out there? Oh, raise your hand, huh? Who's clicking, subscribe?

Who's smashing the like button? Ding that bell. I love TII Nation. Like they tell you they listen to the podcast or watch the podcast. Like it's a secret. You know, people come up to me like, hey, listen to the podcast. Hey, TII Nation. And you're like, are you trying to fuck, dude?

I know about all your shit. Yeah, I know all your dirty secrets. Yeah, that's why. Hey, do you guys think this is weird? Out to dinner in Hawaii last night filming. And a dude comes up, a waiter, and he goes, oh man. Wait, you were in Hawaii last night? No, the last night of filming.

The last night. Okay, okay. Final night. Final night. Thank you. It's all good. Kyle, the way you use words. Log off.

I got a lot of them on my shoulder. You know what I mean? That's right. Yeah. Dude, the waiter comes up and he's just like, oh man. I'm like, hey, he's like, you're from, what's it called? I'm like, I'm gonna say work at Hawks. And he goes, Netflix movie.

And I go, game over, man. He goes, game over, man. I love that movie. Yes. What have you been up to? And I was like, this is somebody who's only seen Game Over, man. Never saw work at Hawks. Yeah, that's kind of sick.

Oh, there's a lot of people like that. There's people that they, like Netflix is the only thing that they consume. I've gotten that multiple times. I'm getting it a lot lately. But that just feels like people being like Ted Danson from, from. Mr. Mayor. Mr. Mayor. And they don't know much.

Yeah. True. CSI. I've been getting a lot of Game Over, man. Love lately. It must be in some kind of a cycle or something. Maybe, I don't know. Maybe they're finally putting it on the front page.

Yeah. Well, we all know Netflix has their shit together compared to other streaming services. Yeah. Dude, we love Netflix. Remember last year when I went to throw out the first pitch at the A's game? And when I was in the A's. Was that me and you together when we did it? No, no.

When I went to Oakland. Oh, okay. Oakland at the beginning of the season. And one of the pitchers for the A's, James Carpillian, he like took me aside and he's like, dude, Game Over, man. I watch it every night before I go to bed. Nice. I'm like, specifically Adam's scene.

Adam's scene. Shout out. Yeah. I was like, hell yeah, dude. The funniest scene in the history of cinema. Yeah. It's awesome. I'm a well-constructed Kai guy.

Oh, come on. That's the writing, baby. Oh, come on. I love this. You're right. You're right. Yeah, I know. I know.

I can't do it without it. People, you know, critics hated the movie. But I think that that scene specifically is one of the funniest scenes that I've ever seen in a movie. It's so fucking good. I love it. You also have to, I feel like our tolerance of seeing male penis is higher than some people's. Like some people, they're like, what?

It's getting. Why? Right. Why? You mean like dudes? Or just people? Mostly dudes. And some women are like, I can't.

It's disgusting. Yeah. Right, right, right, right. It's weird when people are so grossed out or weirded out about it. I'm like, that means that you want to fuck dudes. Or like it's like it does something sexually to you. Oh, if you don't like it so much. Right, right, right.

Yeah, that you like hate it. I guess that explains why I really like it because I don't want to fuck. Is that what? Yeah, probably. No, I love it. That's why I suck on it. I think about it. It's like when like someone like hates gay people too much.

You know what I mean? They're like, oh, what? Yuck. And you're like, well, what's happening to you? American beauty style where the dad kisses Kevin Spacey. Yes. Definitely. People hate what they are not allowed to be.

Well, they think that they're not allowed to like. Yeah. It's very sad. Because of a puritanical society. Okay, here we go. Let's get into it. Let's get into it. Hot, hot, hot.

Because we don't talk about. Polly charge. Okay. Yeah, well, we just don't. You know, we need to be showing dicks more. All types of dicks. We need to be showing boobs more. We need to be showing vaginas a little bit more because we need to.

A little bit more. Just a little bit more. Because we need to understand that the human body is nothing to be ashamed of. But also it's to be laughed at. Correct. You can do that. Laughing is good. Right.

Let's laugh at it. Yeah. Laugh at it. Right. Well, a flop, inherently a flop is funny. I pulled my dick out not to be Oogledenagel. A flop out. Because that is the funniest thing in that situation to have happened.

Right. Okay, but what if you have the least funniest cock? What if it's just super? What does that look like to you? What's the... It's just gray. It's perfect. It's just awesome.

It's gray? Did you say it's gray? It's gray. It's gray. It's not funny. It's gray. And it's alarming. Well, I don't think I have the funniest cock.

Like... It's pretty funny. Yeah. Blake, where are you going? Dr. Ken has the funniest cock that I remember seeing on a movie or a television show. Very funny. Very funny. What was funny?

In Hangover. Hangover, he had like a button cock surrounded by pubes. Yeah. It was hilarious. Right. Look, what Dr. Ken did for the rest of us, I will thank him forever. Right. Yeah.

Because if anybody's ever is like, that's a small dick. I go, hang on. And I pull it up on my phone. And I go, is it small now? And they go, oh no. It's like an egg in a nest, kind of. Right. Yeah.

It looks like a little baby bird egg. Quail egg. It's a quail egg. Got a quail egg cock. It was the best. And also good for him. Put it out there. Yeah.

For sure. Let's do some giggles. Yeah. And now he's on like the mass singer just killing it. Right. Right. Just printing money, baby. He really is.

They got to just blow up that image behind him one day for the mass singer just as a prank. But that wasn't, wait, was that, I'm sorry, but was that his actual cock? I thought that was a, a merkin with a prosthetic. I think it was actually. I thought it was. I don't know. My goodness. I'm not sure if it was his real.

Oh my. I thought that was his real penis. Me too. Maybe I'm wrong. And then if it isn't even cooler to do a, that's even cooler of him too. If he has like a regular size cock. Sure. And then he's like, no, let's make my cock a quarter of an inch long.

Yeah. Yeah. But that's, I would do that. That's a little different. That's, that's different. That's hilarious. I would love to do that. I know.

That's funny. I'm saying that that's great. I would, I would much rather put on a quarter of an inch dick than for people to be like, dude, I just watched a movie with honors home's regular ass, tiny dick. Wait a minute. Well, yeah, exactly. Well, that's, but that was what I did. No, your dick is funny.

You've got. Well, your dick paired with your face is hilarious. Thank you. So those things are great. And your taint and everything they screaming. It was a perfect, perfect comedic physical blast. My favorite thing was that fully just manscaped. Like you had like a five o'clock shadow going.

Oh yeah. Well, you have to pull it up. Can we pull it up? Yeah. You should have given it a little Caesar do. Oh, and Edgar. I should have given it like a little mustache, like Alex with three X's really put some time into it.

That would have been pretty good. Wait, we talked about you get it having a lightning bolt. Yeah, that's right. And then you were like, I'm already clipped. And we were like, fuck. Right. Yeah, you were going to have some pubart. Well, we could have put a merkin.

Well, wait, didn't you do flames and workaholics? Yeah, I did flames and workaholics. Oh, that's right. Yes. That's tight. And thank you for that. Thank you for that. We talked about me doing a prosthetic cock.

But then they told me that it would make my dick look bigger. Right. And then I'm like, well, that's weirder than just showing my dick. Yeah, that was the that was then suddenly I just have this big ass cock. Well, and then it wasn't going to look good. It wasn't going to look good because it was, it was like, I was not stoked on the idea of a fake cock because it was just, I thought we were going to shoot a writing and I thought we're going to shoot around it.

Essentially. Which we did. Which we did. It's hard to shoot around that thing, baby. We did have options to do it. I mean, you can, you can. I met like him wearing a little, what do they call it, a cap or whatever the little thing. And then shooting around.

Oh, like a sock. Yeah. Yeah. Sock. Sock. Oh, I remember I did shoot it to do that in the edit because we could punch in a little bit. You got coverage just in case.

Yeah, yeah, it was there. But then when it was put together, it was just so fucking shocking and hilarious that it felt, it felt tonally correct with the film over the top. Yeah. Damn. That's, that's, that's a dangerous comedy. Okay. That's what that one is.

That's what it says. I get it though. Like, you know, if, if you have a fake, a big fake one, then you have to live up to it. It's kind of like when, did you guys see that? Like Ariana Grande, remember like in her music video, she wrote like in her little journal. Maybe you guys never saw this video, but it was like, I don't need Davidson. And then next to it, she writes like huge. And then like he does a standup where he's like, sheet, that was a fucking chess move

there. Cause now everybody thinks I have this huge dick. And then when they see it, they're like, wow, it's very regular. Right. Well, good for him. That's, that's. But then he, but that was his chest move. Yeah.

That was his chest move. Whoa. You're saying that was a clap back. Well, of course. Of course. This dude knows exactly what he's doing. She writes too. And then he goes, check, check mate.

That's going to make me unlikeable. Okay. So I'm going to go on my standup special and be like, now I'm like completely overrated. Right. And then you're saying he's, he's hogging in. And now girls are like, well, I guess I got to see for myself. Dude, you know, he's hogging. For sure.

Steady hogging. I've got a big fucking border right now. Great drop, Blake. Great drop. So you're saying. Points. You're saying Pete's, Pete's big. I'm saying.

That's what Ariana Grande said. I'm saying Ariana Grande said he's big. She says he's big. That's what we saw in the thank you next video. Uh, Kim Kardashian said he's big. She did. I mean, she fucked him for a long time. I think she only fucks guys with big digs.

I'm a man. And when I fucked him, it was huge. I was super sore. Uh-huh. You pulled the full long string out of your ass afterwards. That's a bagel. That's a string, bro. That's Pete Davidson's cog, man.

That's the size of a rope. Tissers. Chicken. The string. Yeah. And Pete, thank you for doing a voice on Fabulous for you freak brothers. We appreciate you. We appreciate you, dog.

Yeah. I love you, bud. Good guy. Uh-huh. What a life and D. Guy's having quite the run. He really is a good guy. He, I remember when he was on, uh, uh, house party when he was 19 years old and he was

just the nicest kid. Oh, yeah. That was his first time on television. On Adam Devine's house party. Yeah. That was his first time on TV. Oh. Uh, and we sort of launched his whole career.

We did. And, uh, I, I had my buddy goons, uh, get him weed. He was, he was jonesing. Really? Nice. And, uh, yeah. What, uh, what, what city was this in? This, this was the season one of house party in Los Angeles.

Oh, but what city was that? Cause I remember going out there and being like, where are we? It was in the boonies. It was out there. It was like Chatsworth, right? Wasn't it? It was, it was Chamsworth. Chatsworth.

You've never seen homes as large as these homes. You have. They were hilariously ostentatious. They were just giant and dumb and McMansion style. Yeah. It was the Mike Tyson house. Didn't they shoot the hangover in that the same one? I think they did.

It was Mike Tyson's house. Really? Yes. Someone told us that, that, that they did. I'm not sure. But yeah. But these cribs were for sure like 20,000 square feet. Yeah.

They were huge. With like the highest ceilings you've ever seen. Like hilarious. Yeah. Triple vault. But then they're not, they're also not like high quality. Like I feel like you go to, if you go to one of these big beautiful mansions in Beverly Hills that has been there for a hundred years and you're like, oh my God, like everything's

so nice and it's like, is built to stand the test of time. Not leaking. Yeah. And all those homes were like. There's no batting cages. Yeah. Good bones. Good bones.

And these houses were kind of, kind of hilarious McMansions, which was exactly what we wanted for the show. But, but Pete was the man. He's, he's a good kid. How long ago was that Adam? When did we shoot that? 1492. Dude, that was 10 years ago.

That was 2013. Oh, wow. Why do they call them McMansions? What is that? Because it's. Like fast food. Yeah. Don't explain this to him.

Okay. No, what is it? Like fast food? What do you think? What's your theory? I think you're talking like McDonald's. Okay. Fast food.

Uh-huh. They just get it quick to order. So this is like a McMansion. They just pop up. It's cheaply made. And then they were mansion in there to explain the size of it. But it also been like maybe there was some guy named like, uh, Stop.

Mark McGuire. Stop. Mark McGuire came up with. Mark McGuire? You didn't just go with Mick? Dude, I love that you just dropped McGuire. Mick Foley. Mick Dundee.

This is, Mick Foley made this up. Mark McGuire used, his wife used to grocery shop at the grocery store. It's McGuire, by the way. What did I say? Mark McGuire. I know, but I said Mick Guire earlier. Well, what do you need? What are you, uh, McGuire?

What are you saying? Hang on. Adam has a story about his wife shopping at a grocery store. His wife shopped at the grocery store and she would tip like $10 to help her with her bags, which I was like an unfathomable amount of money. So huge. It was just me elbowing. Unfathomable.

All the other baggers to, to, you know, help, help her out with her groceries. Oh yeah. Yeah. Let me help her. That was a cool grocery store, man. Heather Graham was in there. Bed Midler was in there. Elizabeth Hurley.

Who? Who? What about Rodman? Rodman ever roll through on yours? Rodman was in there. Kobe Bryant came through. Damn. I cut, I cut him meats.

Wow. Oh yeah. You used to cut meats. Yeah, that's right. I was, I was a bagger and then I worked my way up and was a sandwich artist in the delicatessen. Right. Boar's head quality meats, dog. Hey, shout out to Boar's head.

So good. Boar's head fucking rocks, dude. Send us a box. Absolutely. Fuck it. Team Boar's head. That kicks butt. I like their cheeses too.

Also. Yeah. The cheese rocks. Hey guys, the workaholics movie, it's not going on Paramount Plus. We have some downtime. I would like to use this time to become morbidly obese. So I am willing to eat all the Boar's head, all the cheese, all the delicious meats that they have.

Meats, cheeses. But here's the thing. It doesn't make you obese. It's actually really healthy for you. Okay. Yes, it's very, it's true. Well, I'm on board. Yeah.

Board. Hey, Boar's head. I'm on board. No. Boar's teenager. It's a whole thing. Yeah. I'm on board.

Boar's, Boar's teenager. I'm Blake Anderson and I run the sound board on. This is important. I just want to say I hope you enjoy Boar's head meats. I'm on board. What? I don't really get it. Yeah, you're a Boar's teenager.

If there's a different version of that, I like it. Yeah. Winning. All right, I'll work on it. Blake Anderson is a Boar's 40-year-old teenager. 40-year-old. See, if we were on set, we would have time to kind of bat that one around. See, like, because that workplace really not working how you're doing it now.

But if you ask that, we would have the time to really hammer that out. And that's one of the many things we lost by not doing the workaholics movies. It's really hammering out those little bits like that, you know? Lordy, lordy, I'm over the boardy. Oh, Blake, you're still going for it. I mean, it's really striking my ego. I'm like, is something wrong with me? You know, I'm at that point of the grieving.

There's a lot wrong with you, brother. I know, but I'm at that point. I'm grieving this. You're a sick club. I get that. What did Emma, Emma just said something to me. Oh, she goes, it's okay. I go, it's okay.

It's fine. You can be butthurt. Look at you go. Solid Emma. Yeah, welcome. Look at you go. Yeah, it's okay to be butthurt right now. It is.

I can't wait to talk to my dad. I hope he goes, that's pretty loose butthole. Right. Yeah. And you go, thank you, dad. Thank you, dad. Thank you for doing that. My mom's gonna be like, I'm gonna go chore to your stepdad about that.

No gag. Wait, what? Wow. Nothing. It's not even from the show. Yeah. What was that? That's just perverted.

Okay. Yeah. That's not from the show at all, dude. What was that? Is this something you gotta tell your dad? Shut up. I thought we were just saying what parents were going to say. Can I go back to fucking your stepdad now?

Which I'm constantly doing. Well, that's cool. They have such a healthy relationship. Okay. Yeah. It's cool that you, and it's cool that you are okay with it, obviously. Oh, boy. I have to be okay.

Yeah, I have to be okay with it. It was a very small house. Gotta be okay with it. Thin walls. Thin walls. Gotta be okay with it. And we did say chore in the show. Okay.

I told Bill to look it up. We did. All right. Oh, is that right? Did we? I can't tell if you were doing a Thanksgiving gag cock reference. I thought you were doing that. We did say chore in the show.

I didn't pull that out of thin air. No, but it's not. What are you doing? I thought that was a thing we just talked about in the writer's room. I don't remember that reference. Loose butthole is iconic. Clearly part of the show. You said chore.

And you pulled chore because, and then you're like, wait, is it in the show? Is it in the show? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's just good. Most things are. C-H-O.

Is it C-H-O-R-G? I don't know. It might be from the basement. No. Okay. Yeah. No. It's Urban Dictionary.

Yeah. Okay. I'll read it. Chore. The sound made when someone gives head. Popcorn. Too deep. Popcorn.

Popcorn. Popcorn. Popcorn. Popcorn. Popcorn. Too deep. And almost chokes. Thank you, guys.

The act of almost choking while giving head. Blake hit us with it. Ders got it. Ders got it. And what's cool. What's cool is you know, like, that a woman came up with that for sure. That name? She was like, I choreed.

And so then what, what were you doing? Well, I choreed. What is that? Well, it's, no, it's onomatopoeia. That would be great. What is it? Onomatopoeia? What is it?

Yeah. What are you talking about? How is that an onomatopoeia? A word that sounds like it is. Yeah. Yeah, though. That's like chore, chore. Like what?

But you're not doing it. Oh, I thought an onomatopoeia was something that was like mom. Like it's. That's a palindrome. No, that's a palindrome. Palindrome. Yes, Ders. Real man, genius.

Wait, but how is chore? I don't know. Cause listen, listen. Okay. I'm going. Chore, chore. Well, you have to really sandwich in the chuck. The thing you did first was what it is.

Chore. No, it's not an onomatopoeia. Chore. Yeah. You're right. It doesn't sound. Chore. Chore.

I guess chore. Pal. Isn't pal a fucking onomatopoeia? Pal. Yeah. Like power bang. Cause flat. I wish they had entomology of these urban dictionary words.

That'd be cool. Isn't entomology the study of bugs? I think so. Real man, genius. Real man, genius. Is it entomology, the study of coffee cakes? I think so. Yeah.

Ants. It's ant study. Entomology. Entomology is the study of coffee cakes and I'm sticking with that. Isn't it the history? I think entomology is the history. Like where it started from. Nobody gets that.

So now that we essentially have our spring off guys, what are we going to get really good at? Pickleball. What thing are you guys? Oh, no. Pickleball. I'm deep in pickleball already. So I'll just keep doing that shit.

Yeah. I'll come play now. I'll come play, dude. Yeah. I'm ready. I was tied down. All right. You know what I want to do?

I want to become a golfer. I really do want to become a golfer. All golf. I got some clubs. I feel like all of my friends are golfing all the time. I have clubs. All golf with you. Yeah.

Let's take up golfing, guys. Yeah. I want to be those, because that's a, for whatever reason, people just accept golfing as like a thing that you can go do for four hours. Yeah. And they're like, oh, he's golfing. Right. But if you were to go like, I'm just going to smoke weed and play video games.

Right. That's unacceptable. You know what I mean? But like, I feel like the wives, they, for whatever reason, wives in society allow golf to be a thing. So let's do good. Let's get into that shit. Yeah.

I'm in. Let's go. I think the cat's out of the bag now, though. Yeah. We're fucked. You just explained it. Yeah. Our wives don't listen to this shit.

Let's go say we're golf. I can play video games. I want to get good at like Majon. And Blake, what is that? Majon poker? Is that poker? That's poker, right? It's the tile game.

All right. Taipei? The Taipei game on the computers? Yeah. I'm going to go golfing with Adam. Well, I'm going to go drink beers on beautiful vistas on golf courses. Yeah. Yeah.

I'm going to smoke blunts. You can drink beers and smoke blunts and play Majon. Yeah. But you're not in beauty. You know what, Blake? You can find me and Adam at the Riv. Yeah. You're like in a rec center or some shit.

You're at an old folks home. Guys, Kyle's dropping a reference here. Go for it, Kyle. Blake, me and Adam are going to be at the Riv. Uh-huh. Okay. Isn't that a country club in Palisades, Rivera? It is.

It's super expensive. Oh, shit. Yeah, let's go there, dude. Yeah. They got pickleball there. I golfed at Torrey Pines during the pandemic and it's fucking beautiful and raggedy. Oh, really? Where is that?

Where's Torrey Pines? Torrey Pines is like on the way to San Diego because it's a public course, but it's like on the ocean. So it's like really fucking ridiculous and it's not that expensive to play. And I think it's only like $70 if you live right there. That's cool. Which is bananas. Whoa, whoa.

What is the cost of golf? It's bad, dude. Oh, it's a few hundred dollars if it's a nice course. The fuck? It all depends. Wow. It's upwards of 150 to like 300 bucks. Wow.

If you're part of like a country club or like a, what's the one in Studio City? It's insane. I saw that. I looked at country clubs around my crib. How much the country club to join in Newport Beach? Just to join. And then you still have to pay like dues. Can I guess?

Can we guess first? Can we guess first? Yeah, I'll guess. Yeah. The nut to join. Is it $600,000? No, it's not $600,000. No, it's less than that.

No, no. It's, my guess is it's around $80,000 a year to play golf at that club. But what's the, no, what's the buy-in? He's talking about the buy-in. No, the buy-in. And then there's like monthly dues. I want to say it's $30,000 a month. You're talking about the buy-in.

No, not a month. Just the nut buy-in that you have to pay just to join and then there's dues. And I don't know what the dues are. I don't know. I don't know. I mean, I still am going $80,000. I think it's somewhere around there. $100,000.

I'm going to say $125,000 to join. It's so much more than $120,000. It's not that much more. It's $200,000. Thank you. Really? Which is a lot to me, Durr. It's a ton.

Of course. That's a lot just to join. The rib is, I think, four. Oh, wow. Was the Palisades nicer than the Newport Beach? But then I think it's $30,000 a month. Just ditch the golf. Well, I wouldn't think so.

I would think that the Country Club lifestyle down in Newport Beach is way more pricey than Palisades. Around here. Yeah. Well, just because it's like. No. That's the Palisades, dude. But it's more the culture down there.

Yeah. It's different. Golf has weird rules. But the Palisades, that's the only one they got. Yeah. I bet it's because there's a lot of money up there. I mean, there's a lot of money in Newport Beach as well. But I think that escaping the hustle and bustle of Los Angeles is more of a thing.

Check the link that I just dropped in, because this is what I was reading a while back. Dude, do they talk about the one near, like, Toluca Lake? That one's pretty exclusive. That's the one where, like, actors aren't allowed to join, right? Yeah. Oh, really? Because Santino was telling me about it, because Santino's apparently a really good golfer and golf's a lot.

And. I could see that. The golf's at this place, and he's like, there's no actors allowed to join. You can go play if you're invited, but you're not allowed to be. Well. Okay, the RIV is 250 to join. Yeah, 250. That's crazy.

But the annual dues, do you know? Does that come up? I don't know. I think it's like 30,000. I think it's 30,000 a month. So that's right in the wheelhouse. It seems like the nice ones are 250, 200, 160, 180. But here's the thing, if you don't play golf, you can get a tennis and, like, a swimming

pass for way fucking cheaper. Yeah, I know. This is what I've been looking at. And if you're just listening now, this is when we became absolutely unrelatable. I'm wearing a hot dog sweatshirt, though. I know. I'm like, I just wanted to play golf. I'm like, that seems like an insane amount of money, too.

Then you still have to pay for golf. Yes. It only gets you in the club. No, you don't. I don't think so. You get to play a certain amount per week or something. You have tickets. If you exceed that.

Oh, really? Yeah. Yeah. But people join multiple clubs. That's why I was like, I'm good on that. Yeah. Dude, it's crazy. No, this is like real.

Justin Timberlake is like a scratch golfer, and he belongs to like four clubs, I think. Yeah. Dang, dude. If I would have done the workaholics movie, I would have done this, but now I can't. Yeah, we can. So let's just go frisbee golfing. Yeah, I love it. Now we're relatable.

Yeah, that's like five bucks. Get out your leopard and your fucking cheetah and your ogre or troll. Oh, nice. What do they call the putters? Do they call the T-Bird or whatever? Birdie? What do they call it? Dude, you're past me.

The putter. The little putter? I think it's just called putter. No, no. What the discs are, ANOVA? ANOVA makes a beautiful disc. And what's cool about ANOVA is not only are their discs beautiful, but the bags that they carry the discs in that they make, unbelievable.

The t-shirts are fun. I was never the frisbee golf. I never went with the bag. I always just either one or two discs and then just get out there. Me too. I think it was too much if you had the whole bag. I had a fanny pack. Really?

Yeah. You've seen it. Had a subway sandwich. Oh, I love that. I love that fanny pack. We got to go play paintball. Or is that what we did when you, yeah, let's get, let's fucking paintball, dude. Yeah.

Let's get really good at paintball. Yeah. Anything that I can wear my fanny bag. Yes. And put subway sandwiches in it. But yes, Adam, to get like the crates with like the wheels, that's a whole lifestyle. That's too much. Oh, you're talking like a roller bag?

Yeah. Yeah. You're going to have four or five discs and a 40 and you're good to grab one. Yeah, bro. 40 and a blunt. And a blunt, a blunt, a blunt that's rolled, dawg. Let's do it. That's it, baby.

And my orc. I'm totally down to live this life with you guys now. Let's become golfers. Let's do frisbee golf. Let's get way into hacky sack again. Real quick. Real quick. Okay.

The race society is gone, right? Where? Okay. Uh-oh. Here we go. All right. Poly charge. It's so famous.

If you're rich to have like made it and be like balling out, you're on like private jets, you're drinking Cristal. Cristal. What was this? 2006? Am I crazy? Or was there nothing more baller than when Dr. Dre opened the refrigerator and had it full of 40s from top to bottom?

Because to me, I was like, isn't that all you really need to do? Right. There is a certain amount of excess that you do not need to tap into. A refrigerator full of 40s. Buzz balls. Unbelievable. Yep. You made it.

You did it. Yeah, that's, that is cool. It's really cool. What do you need more than that? Admittedly, my favorite thing about having the small amount of money that I have is having refrigerators stopped. Yes. You're very good at that, Adam.

You're rich. Dude. Yes. Okay. I'm rich. Yeah. No, but you're very good at it. Good at being rich.

But the refrigerator game is on point. Yes. It is my favorite thing about, I'm like, just always, always. I'm bad at that. My shit's just fucking veggies. That's kind of it, dude. Adam always has seltzer waters. He always has Coke zeros.

He always has beers. He always has, you know, some sort of maybe a tonic, gin and tonic pre-made. That's so cool. You know what? You know, I got them cans ready to go. You got them cans. Someone wants a cannabis beverage. Oh.

Dude, can I give a shout out to a drink that I had when I was just in Colorado hitting the slopes? Of course you can. Absolutely. Please, please do. It's called Smooge. Oh. Smooge.

Oh my God. Splooge? That's what I kept saying. Yeah, well, that's a bad name. It's real close to Splooge. That's what I kept saying. Okay. Nice.

But they had, it's a hard seltzer smoothie in a can. What the? And I bought it being like, what the fuck is this? What the fuck is going on? That sounds like something. It was a pina colada in a can and it was un-fucking-believable, S-M-O-O-J, I believe. Shout out. You made my weekend up in Colorado a good time.

It was unbelievable because it sounds diarrhea. I know. Yeah, I know. It sounds a little nasty. What's it called? Smooge? It's called Smooge Hard Smoothies, bro. Yeah.

I don't want hard smoothies. And dude, I was like, I drank, I bought them on, because you guys know me. I'm the guy who grabs like the thing in the grocery store that's like, what is this? You guys know me. He goes weird. You're trying every Oreo flavor. He loves it. And I bought it and I drank one and then I was yelling at everybody to have to drink

one and people were like, this is actually kind of off the chain. Really? Yeah. It sounds like a terrible idea. Well, I mean, what are the, because that sounds like thick as hell. Is it the type of thing? It's thick. I'm looking at it.

Adam, it's viscous. Yeah. It's thick. I do like a viscous drink. Is it like you could only have one or you could pound a handful? Yeah. You don't want to drink more than two, I would say. Yeah.

Just like if you were poolside, you wouldn't be slamming pina coladas because you would have ultimate heartburn and like your teeth would fall out. Yeah. We're old now. You can't just pound certain things, but you can't eat an entire rotisserie chicken rope and all. You can do that. Yeah.

You can just pound cake. Pound certain things. But dude, this was so good and I'm going to beg them to send me some stuff. Do you blend it with ice or you just drink it straight up? Just a can. It's got the consistency of the smoothie straight like a pina colada. It's wild. But smoothies are like frozen.

Dude, and read the ingredients. Read the ingredients. Simple ingredients. Yeah. No gluten or dairy. Just enough booze, man. It's like a light bubbles jam packed with nature's candy. No artificial flavoring.

Right. The ingredients are like fruit, this fruit, that fruit, seltzer water, alcohol, period. That's great. Period. Period in there. Period. Oh, okay. Wow.

That's what gives it the viscous. Yeah. The viscous is tiring. Well, this is really interesting. By the way, they were packing the boxes to send to us and then we sent that and they were like, oh, these are the guys whose movie didn't get made? Done. Yeah.

Hold up. We know what their thing is. Let them just sit there. Damn. I mean, it's still, I'm still dumbfounded that we're not currently shooting the workaholics movie. It's beyond me. It would be happening as this aired or no, a little in a couple weeks.

No. We'd still be a couple weeks out. Putting the ties on. Yeah. Oh, growing my mustache. I just shaved my beard too. Son of a bitch. That's a bummer, bro.

I could have had the longest thickest beard. Getting my classic Lego hair haircut. Dude, I was going to bleach my hair again. I was going to go back to the bleach coral. I think you should. That would be tight. You should just do that. Yeah.

Cut my hair and bleach it. Just go. Yeah. I mean, it's not a spoiler. There's nothing to spoil anymore. Fucking whole thing got to goddamn spoiled. I'm pissed now. I'll tell you what.

The whole goddamn thing got spoiled. Oh, Jordan, your dad. I still love you. I guess I'll just be pounding schmoozes, man, afterworld. Afterworld. A 12 pack is $60. Yeah, I saw that. Okay.

Holy shit, man. Yeah. We got to scale it back. Okay. We're the movies not getting made. We can't afford the schmoozes anymore. Scale it back. No golf.

No schmooge. They call these things hard smoothies, but wouldn't it be better if they were called rough smoothies? Huh? Just. Well, no. Any takebacks or? Yeah.

No, that's a really bad name. Rough. Like you drink it and you're like, rough. Oh, this is rough. This is rough. Yeah. But smooth and rough would be like directly. Oh, rough.

Sure. Only for this. Only for this. I'm not saying make a hard and smooth. No. But hard and smooth. Yeah. Hard and right.

Right. I don't know. Like a bowling ball. Yeah. I'm probably wrong, but I just noticed. Yeah. A still smoothie. And that's another one of the bits that we really could have hammered out if we were

on set together and had if we're standing next to each other for 12 hours a day, we would really hammer those bits home. Yeah. See, they get first thoughts here on the pod. You wanted to give you guys like third thoughts on the movie. Yeah. Right, right, right. Not just first.

We wanted a workshop this shit. Yeah. Hey, I'd say even like eight eight thoughts. Dude, 10th. It's great. So many thoughts we put into that movie that now just isn't getting made. And they get better. They get better every time.

I'm angry. I'm still gonna send it cut to commercials, cut to commercials. to commercials. Hey, welcome back, guys. We're still mad. We're still angry. We're salty. Let's complain.

Oh, you know, we should do what? Take a trip to Africa. Take a page out of Dave Chappelle's book. That would be very cool. Let's do it. I'm down. I mean, did Emma just went and fucking bawled out on some safari?

I'm so super jelly. Oh, that's like some sweet pictures. She said it was amazing. Dude. So I'm going to be, I think by the time this airs, I'll be in Indonesia. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. What when is that? I leave next Tuesday. That's so exciting. You don't have to come back. Yeah. Now I might never come back. Are you guys actually going to hit land

or just going to be around? No, I think we're going to stay on. We're going to be like on the boat. I think we might like go to like have a dinner on some island at one point. But I have no idea. Epstein. Right.

But the weather, I'm looking at the weather. Dude, it's it looks like it's thunderstorms. Some cyclone. Yeah. Like like every day. So that's cool. But that's fun on a boat. Yeah.

I might come back with like an insane story. Like, or you might not come back. It might be a new story. It might be a new story. Yeah. Yeah. Possibly be a new story. What is the what is the boat situation?

Is it a little boat, big boat? What are you doing? It's like a big yacht. It's like a 180 foot yacht and there's a it's like a it's a big yacht. Yeah. A proper proper ship. Nice.

And it's it's for my friend's birthday party and there's going to be just a ton of us drinking and having fun on this boat. That's snorkeling as long as the weather is tight. But yeah, we will see. Yeah, that does concern me. Yeah. That that concerns me.

God, and I couldn't pull the name of the guy to tell the joke. And then I was like, well, what was his jizz Lane? It's really cool that your friends with jizz Lane, Max. Well, have fun with her on the jizz Lane. God, I was here struggling. I'm like, what was the fucking do's name? Oh, Epstein, bro. Epstein Island.

Yeah, we're going to dine on Epstein Island. Adam's going to Indonesia with Epstein's ghost. Whoa. No, that's legit. But remember when it would storm for a little bit in the Bahamas when we were doing Shark Week and it was kind of cool. Yeah. Yeah, Chloe was kind of bummed when she was looking at the weather.

She's like, God, this might suck. And I'm like, well, if it's anything like the Bahamas, it was like the storm rolls in and it rolls right the fuck out. And it was kind of cool. And the boat has the boat has the thing. But those waters in the Bahamas were very calm. Yeah. What do you think?

He's going to like the Pirates of Dark Waters? I don't know. You think there's a monkey bird? He's going to the triangle, bro. He's going to the triangle Bermuda. No, I'm going to the triangle sadness. Bermuda, sure. Yeah, no, I mean, it's Indonesia.

So there's like 1500 islands right there. So I think you're able to like dip behind islands. And these guys, you know, it's a professional shit. Dip behind islands. Adam Devaney dips behind islands. Oh, that's so good. Well, you know what I mean? Like if you're able to hide from storms a little bit.

Yeah, I would assume. I would assume. Stormhider. Monsoon. Yeah, I think you're right. Get all up in a cove somewhere. By the way, we were going to film a movie. Adam, you're going missing on this trip.

It was never going to happen. The movie. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. You weren't coming back from that one, right? SS Minnow is the are the people there essentially? Because I know a couple of people there. And it kind of seems like the cast of Gilligan's Island.

A three hour tour. I'll just say I'll say homegirl. She's definitely Mary Jane. Don't get the rash. Adam, you're the skipper 100%. Homeboy. Homeboy. Who's Dobie Gillis?

I don't know. I don't know all the people. I just know a couple. Yes, you do. I barely, I barely remember what Gilligan's Island to begin with. So I did not like that show at all when it did come on like FX or whatever. I know. Yeah, I definitely turned it.

FX. Even when like the fucking Harlem Globetrotter showed up. Dude, FX. Nick at night. FX when it originally started was very old shows. It was like Treasure Island. It was like Batman, the show, Mission Impossible. Oh, well, I would have gone like Nick at night or some shit.

That's where I saw all my old shows. Yeah, me too. I saw it as it aired. There's is the oldest man we know. I auditioned for that and didn't get it. Yeah. Shut up again. Shut up again.

Dobie Gillis. Actually, it's the same guy, right? Dobie Gillis is the same. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's, that's what, yeah. Gilligan is Dobie Gillis. Yeah, so we will see. Gilligan is Dobie.

How many seasons did Gilligan's Island at? By the way, it probably only went like two or three. That's what's crazy about some of these shows. When you look back and they were iconic. That shit was huge. Huge. It just had the best theme song, right? Well, there was only like three channels, bro.

No, I know, but Gilligan's Island is like, what is it? It goes like, oh, three, three seasons. That is so. You're kidding me. Wow. Yeah, three seasons. No, I'm not kidding. Three seasons, but 98 episodes though.

Oh, Jesus fuck. Well, that's a horse of a different color. That's a bad contract, Gilligan. Right, Dobie. Hey, you get to renegotiate after four seasons. Okay. Just after the third season, we'll renegotiate. You have to do 33 episodes a season.

That's insane. What a damn dude. 36 episodes of the first season. That's wild. You know what? The skipper kind of jacked, right? Was he? Yeah.

He was, they made him like fat or whatever, but he was like old school fat, which was just like thick with like a belly. Dude, I know that's how my body is going to morph into. I know. Exactly. Dude, this guy looks like Adam. You're talking about Alan Hale Jr. That used to be fat.

The new fat is like morbidly obese with like skin sagging off you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're hanging on by a thread nowadays. You used to be able to like, you're fat, but like your whole body's hard to the touch. Exactly, yes. You're, you're a hard smoothie. Yeah, this guy is Adam. You're smooth.

Your body is smooth, bro. Send us a box. You're smooth in check. This dude just looks like John Madden. He has like a football player's body. Right. He looks, his Adam, Derz is definitely the professor. 100%.

Oh, and we're not talking streetball. Are we talking streetball professor? Oh, shit. Spider-Man. I'm talking Gilligan Island. I'm half man, half amazing. Blake is Gilligan. So which guy am I?

I'm the skipper. Is that what we're saying? Yeah, you're Alan Hale Jr. Oh, for sure. Yeah. And then Blake, you're Bob Denver. Yeah. Who's Bob Denver?

Bob Denver. The Bob Denver is Gilligan. He's Gilligan, homie. He's Doby. Oh, wow. Thank you. What a blessing. Thank you.

Yeah. Well, you have the hair. You have the funny hair. It's like you, you have to do that. Gilligan doesn't have funny hair. I know, but he has funny eyes and he's goofy. So like, you're not going to be able to hide that. He was like a dumb sweetheart.

Yeah. It's Blake. Thank you. Exactly, yes. Was Gillian the first Gillian? Oh, he can't even say his name. Was Gilligan the first bro ever to have swoop bangs? Is he the original emo swoop bang?

His bangs are great. I think he had a sailor's hat on the whole time, didn't he? A bucket hat. But the swoop bangs were hanging. Yeah, but his bangs are cutting or they're swooping out of from the front. Are you guys looking at something? Yeah, we're looking at Wikipedia. Yeah, looking at nude photos of Ben Denver.

Is he on feet.com? His name is Bob Denver. Yeah, Ben. Oh, he's got the wrong guy. Bob Denver has swoop. Did you say boom Denver? He said Ben. Jesus.

If you have Bob Denver like and kid didn't know him, they might think he just is the front man of like vampire weekend. This guy has swag. Yeah, I mean the like rugby he's rocking is tight and he's got like a little flair. Yeah, this bro has swag. They all did. He does. The collar is great.

Yeah, this is just. Oh, Kyle, are you the old dude? Mr. fucking, what's the rich dude's name? Who's the old dude? The rich old dude. Was he like perverted? Well, if he's perverted there, bro, that's me. I don't know any of these characters.

The professor and Mary Ann. Yeah, look at the old dude with the hat. Who's the old dude? Is that Russell Johnson? What were their names? Yeah, I don't know any of these guys. That's Russell Johnson. That's, I think that's him.

No, that's the professor. Anders, can you answer this? Did this show take place over? Did this dude just did this? How long were they on this island? Years. Yeah. Yeah, they're stuck.

But they never change clothes. They have the same clothes every episode. Yeah, exactly. Yes. Just like us. They're stranded. Yeah. The whole thing is like it's a three hour tour.

Oh yeah. And then they thirst and howl for a third. And they left from the Newport Beach Harbor. That was where they shot it. Really? No shit, dude. You gotta be careful out there, Adam, promise. Yeah, dude.

Promise? Never. No? Oh boy. Durs, are you talking about Jim Bacchus? Is that the... You're just making up names. Yeah, Jim Bacchus.

Jim Bacchus is thirst and howl. The third. Okay. Durs, as our oldest friend, what was your favorite old show? Was it Gilligan's Island? Or was it... I got mine. I mean, are we going that far back?

Yeah, like old show. Dude, I got it. I got, I had no mine too. What I loved. Yeah, I mean, dude, like speaking of perverts, like... I don't mind. Let's talk about them. Dick Van Dyke was a tight show.

Like I actually really enjoyed it because it was like... I don't even know that. Well, hey, I love Lucy was insanely funny. It was very funny. I love Lucy's very good, but like... It's great. I dream of Jeannie. Come on.

I dream of Jeannie was good. But Dick Van Dyke, he was a comedy writer on the show. It was cool. I remember as a little kid being like, oh, you can just be a comedy writer and... I didn't like that show. I never watched it. Oh, really? I never saw it.

Yeah, that show, it always seemed to corporate for me. I just was like, nah. Corporate. That's not my shit, dude. Yeah, he's too gnar. Yeah. Corporate. It's so corporate.

Because yeah, he was like an office dude. He was sharply dressed and all that, I guess. Oh, suit and tie. Yeah, the texture of it was not me. I was more Mr. Ed or like fucking happy. Mr. Ed, that show sucks. Well. Mr. Ed was...

I remember being always disappointed about Mr. Ed. Yeah, that show had nothing to it. Yeah, yeah. Always being like, oh, watch, this is talking to a horse. And then being like, what the fuck is going on? Yeah. Wilbur. It was so sick.

All I need is one little gimmick like this. And I'm fucking in, bro. I mean, Patty Duke was a babe. Does this one count? Three's company. That's like 70s. No, that's not old enough. That's too new.

That's 70s. It's got to be before then. Oh, well, that was my shit. Black and white. I'm thinking black and white. Oh, really? But then happy days, happy days. Does that count?

That's not black and white. Happy days is not black and white. Yeah, happy days would count. That's not black and white. No, no, Adam. That's a show from later on that's a play on a throwback. Okay. Oh, is it?

Yeah, it didn't. It took place before it aired. Those shows always trip me out when I'm a kid because I just imagined it was from the time period that they were shooting. It's like watching days and confused now if you're 15, you're like, dude, is this from the 70s? No, it's from 25 years later. Completely confused me even when it came out because it had, it was all 70s inspired,

but it was made in the 90s. I thought it was an old movie. It's a timepiece. Like a watch. Braveheart. Yeah, Braveheart was also made in the 90s. That was weird to me because that's like about way earlier than the 90s. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's a trip to me. Yeah. I'm sure that's very confusing to our director. Passion of the Christ. Was that, did that throw you a passion of the Christ through you? It's super weird. Yeah, just a trip. Dude, mid 90s?

Fucked me up. Mid 90s really happens. I was like, whoa. Twisted. I know that just came out. I was like, what? Jonah? Come on.

You magician, dude. You made this as a child? I don't understand. That's crazy. Yeah. When did you do this? Are you the main character? Is this found footage?

What's going on? Was he in it? I can't even remember that movie. Was he in it? No, he was not. No. No, Jonah's not in that. No, not in that.

That movie's cool though. I like that movie. Skater die. I stand by, I love Lucy. That is by far the funniest black and white TV show. Yeah. I stand by the Beatles. I stand by macaroni and cheese.

Okay. That's what the funniest and best old black and white TV show is. Didn't say the best. What's your favorite? Beverly Hillbillies, maybe? It was, I love Lucy. Yeah, Beverly Hillbillies. That was off the chain.

I know, but I love Lucy. It's great, but it doesn't have that sauce though. It does. What are you talking about? I love Lucy had the sauce. No, no, no. No, no. You know what it was for me?

The Monsters. The Monsters. As soon as you say what's it called, I was like, the Monsters was off the chain. Or Adams Family. Oh my God. That show is corny. I know, but it was like, how was this on? Monsters and Adams Family Rock.

Yeah, but you were a kid and it was fucking weird. Yes. Blake. Monsters and Adams Family Rock. Adam, it was definitely something that should not be on. Yes. It felt fucking bizarre. I love the swing.

Did anybody watch the new movie? The Rob Zombie one? I want to watch it. There's a new Monsters movie? I watched it. I watched it. It's fucking bizarre. Who's Eddie Munster?

Oh no. And why didn't I get it? Yeah. Why didn't Adam book this? Yeah. I watched it. It's really bizarre. They kept the exact time.

Actually, Adam, I know why. They said you were unavailable because you're doing the Workaholics movie. Yeah, because I was doing the Workaholics movie. It makes sense. God, how many of those are we going to walk back? Who's in the new Monsters movie? It's just a bunch of, like, I think... His wife, who's in all of Rob Zombie's movies.

Because Rob Zombie drives the Monsters car, right? In real life? He bought it? I think so. Oh, I think so. Yeah. I remember him doing... Dragula.

I thought he was going to bring back the show. I didn't know that it was going to be a movie. It's a movie, I think. They shot it in Bulgaria and it's fucking weird. But visually, it looks awesome. I mean, it looks cool. He's a good director. I liked House of a Thousand Corpses in those movies.

Yeah. Yeah, they're fun. They're very visually bizarre and narratively loose. Okay, you know? Narratively loose. I'm looking at a nightmare. Oh, I didn't even know that this was a movie. The Monsters movie, 2022.

The fact that this got made and the Workaholics movie didn't seems weird. It's fucked up. It does seem weird. It seems weird to me. Who made that? Who made that? Do we know? I think it's Netflix.

It's Watch on Netflix. Hey, Netflix. Make our movie. Oh, but you know who's in it. Who's in it? JK, you don't. Oh, fucking Cassandra Peterson. Yep.

AKALvira. Sure. Any takebacks or? Apologies. Any epic slams? Compliments? Dead ringers? I would like to give flowers to Paramount Plus.

Good on them. Yeah. You know? Leave them wanting less. Oh, I had a dead ringer. I was watching Pete Davidson stand up and friends and there's this dude that came out and sang called Big Wet and I was like, yeah, that's me. Wait, didn't I send you guys a dead ringer of a guy who looks like me and Kyle fucked?

Oh, yeah. You did it. Oh, yeah. Yeah. That was wild. That just came up and I was like, this guy. Oh my god. Oh my god.

He was like, even our minds had fucked in that guy, right? He was like a tech dude. Oh, yeah. You do kind of look like Big Wet, Kyle. You see Big Wet? Yeah, you look like Big Wet. Yeah. But you, I mean, you need to gain like five or six pounds.

Six pounds. Yeah. Give me till spring. I'm very impressed now that we're not making this. Give me till spring, man. Well, I have a candy critique. Oh, good. Freeze dried skittles.

Very delicious. If you can get your hands on freeze dried skittles, they are sold. Freeze dried. And can you explain more? Yeah, what does that even mean? Can you buy these or you have to freeze dry them yourself? It's aspirin on candy. You can order them online, but basically it's like they put skittles in a freeze dryer

or whatever and they expand, they like puff up and they're very delicious. You've got to try them. Put them in a freeze dryer or whatever. Cool. I don't know the process. I've never YouTube'd it. I'm pretty sure they don't make skittles and then do something to them, right? Yes.

They take skittles and pour it into a freeze dryer or something. What is a freeze dryer? I don't know. They make freeze dried starburst freeze dried. Yes, for astronauts. Genius. Astronauts, right? Are astronauts eating this or climbers?

You're eating food that was supposed to go to astronauts? I assume so, yeah. And it's delicious. Or climbers. It's like astronauts are military or something. And it's delicious. So try them. So that's my candy critique.

Thank you, Blake. We'll be looking into that. Candy critique. Is this a new segment brought to you by Hershey's and Mars? Or freeze dryer machines. And you could just do it. All right. Hey, now we know.

Oh, all right. Thanks. And that was another episode of... This is important. Important. Important. Important. Important.

Important. Important. Important. Important. Important. Blake.