This Is Important - Ep 190: The Perfect Pop Tart Heat Up Recipe

Episode Date: March 5, 2024

Today, this is what's important: Naked Grandma, Rolexes & Mark Wahlberg, gambling, pissing your pants, pop tarts, hot pockets, & more. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hi, I'm Vanessa Bayer and this is my brother Jonah. And we are so excited to have you hear the latest season of our nostalgia theme podcast, How Did We Get Weird? Not only do you get to know me and my brother, you get to know the stories that made us the absolutely rad people we are today. Check out our episodes where we've welcomed hilarious guests like our friend Andy Samberg. That's it, that's really it! And Queen Casey Wilson.

I really went cart before the horse. I said, I think I have an opportunity to interview Leonard the Capernaut as a high school student. Casey Wilson. I really went cart before the horse. I said, I think I have an opportunity to interview Leonard the Capricorn. Oh my God. As a high school student. And you do not want to miss out on our funny segments like change.dork. Ha ha ha ha ha, change.dork. And congratulations, you played yourself.

Congratulations, you played yourself. Listen to our podcast, How Did We Get Weird on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts? What up? I am Dramos, host of the Life as a Gringo Podcast. This is a show for the no sabo kids, the 200%ers. Here we celebrate your otherness

and embrace living in the gray area. Every Tuesday, I'll be bringing you conversations around personal growth, issues affecting the Latin community, and much more than every Thursday, I'll be tackling trending stories and current events from our community. Listen to Life as a Gringo on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi there, I'm Bob Pippman, Chairman and CEO of iHeartMedia.

I'm excited to announce a new season of my podcast, Math and Magic, stories from the frontiers of marketing. Our guests this season show us big risk can yield big rewards, like Rob Riley, the creative head of one of the world's leading advertising firms. I try to create environments where anybody can say anything without any judgment. Listen to a brand new season of Math and Magic on our very own iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcast. Welcome to This Is Important, a production of iHeartRadio,

the show where we only talk about what's obviously most crucially integral to the fabric of our very nature. Today we talk about... I'm not wet at this point. Nothing's wet. I'm just butt naked and I don't know where my pants are.

You put the chips on the sandwich, dude. Donnie D on the back up. Drug freeze up at the crack up. Here we go. Start your engines. Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring. I just went apart. In a damn thing change.

I'm pissed now. It's like, oh, look at us. Look at us this week. A bunch of hat boys. Woo. Dude, I'm wearing a hat boy. This is so embarrassing. I'm wearing the exact same thing. Oh, you sicko. You dumb. You're in sicko mode.

And I'm having some beef jerky, guys. Oh, God. Naked grandma, boys. Okay, for everybody listening, Dersh just took a bite of a beef stick and Adam has a naked grandma hat, dude. Where'd you get that? Whoa.

You know, it's just an audio medium, but I like to do visual bits. Yeah. You know? Someone gave it to me during our sick ass life tour. Oh, she embroidered real high. Here we go. They did go a little high with the embroidery. Yeah. It's almost kind of hard to see when you're just wearing the hat. Yeah, it's kind of over the top of his

head. You gotta go. It's kind of maybe like they made a bunch of them and you got the first one. It's certainly over back for sure, the writing there. It says Naked Grandma though, which I thought, hey, what a fun, fun merch. I feel, you know, maybe we get some Naked Grandma hats. Yeah. That being said, I haven't worn it out and about a lot.

Yeah, sure. Naked Grandma! Because I don't, I don't want people to be like, Naked why? Pull it back! Why Naked Grandma? And then I'd have to be like there's a podcast do podcast That shit's important. Oh, yeah Well embrace it and they go and what is it on the pocket and you go well? So what we do is we say is that's a naked grandma they go out on a stand and go well

Okay, what have you ever watched family feud? Okay? Do you know the what pap thing where it was like a surfer and knocking grandma? They just start walking away. Yeah. Yeah. They immediately, they tell me I could no longer eat at this restaurant. They're like, actually, I'm sorry, but you have to leave this Carl's Jr. We're out. Here's your footlong spicy Italian story. You can leave now. And here's your footlong cookie and footlong pretzel and footlong churro as well. That's right. They do foot-long cookies. They do do foot-long cookies, which is weird. Dude.

And I like, what do they call it? They do foot-long cookies and foot-long churros and they call it like the snack pack and you're like, you have to, and in the commercial, it's like, you have to have a snack pack or something like that. And you're like, no, you don't. You don't have to have a foot long cookie to go along with your subway sandwich. Goodbye. You don't need a foot long cookie. You don't. Most of America does.

I had a foot long sandwich in years. I gave up. I was like, yeah, I thought you're about to say something else because I know I know you've had foot long. I've never had a foot long. I've never had a footlong. I've never had a Drake. Yeah, it's just it's so much food. I don't know how we got tricked into like the footlong sandwich is so much food. Yeah, you need another four inches. Yeah, if you're a bitch, dude.

Yeah, I don't I could eat a footlong of everything, man. If it's not a foot isn't that big, if you ask me. I'm saying I can, but I never feel like I like did the right thing after eating a foot long sandwich. If I eat a half a foot long, what is that? Five, six inches? Yeah, I do feel that's six inches. Yeah. I'm like, perfect. That was great. Not, I'm like, you need another four inches. As soon as I'm done. Yeah, sorry. Yeah, I feel like, is it Jimmy John's that gives you the option of like six nine or 12? It's they give you that nine six nine twelve.

They give you that like in between where you're like, you know, I just six inches sometimes doesn't get the job done. Then you got it. Then you got to go chips at Jersey. Mike's will then. Yeah, I like I go to my flat, but go chips. I go chips with a foot long anyway. I go the boots with the burn. I don't see, I don't like chips.

You don't like chips or you don't like chips with a foot long? What the hell? Well, I don't, it's always just like, I guess if I'm gonna get the six-inch, I'm gonna need a little more food. Okay. So I'll get chips. I can't stop eating.

But the nine-inch- okay is the perfect amount of food I don't need the chips. I don't need the chips. Okay. I It's not that I don't want It's not that I don't want more food. I want different food So if I get a six inch or a jay jersey Mike's I go mini okay, let's get a bag of chips for different food Dude you guys are skipping over the most important thing about chips at a sandwich shop. You put the chips on the sandwich, dude. That fucking makes the sandwich the sandwich.

Yeah. No, that does that technically does not make the sandwich the sandwich. Well it makes it like a pool sandwich and that shit is the best kind of sandwich. I admittedly, I like that. I'm with you on that one. That to me is wiki wawaw. Yeah. That to me is wiki-wawaw. Yeah, that to me is wiki-wawaw. I got Cisco on my team.

Do you have that? Oh, from last week, that's right. Yeah, from last week. Do you have that on the board yet? Um, I don't. Go ahead and hit it now. Yeah! Yeah, go ahead and drop that wiki-wawaw.

Okay, hold on. Let me see. Yeah, because we're going. No! God damn it. No, it'd be hard. You know it. Wow. Okay. Hold on. Let me see. Yeah No Our podcast is like groundhogs day, baby The people just keep coming back. Dude, I love it. Seems like we did that just a minute ago. I will say it puts you in a great mood.

Feels good. Hot, hot, hot, hot. And is Will gonna start? Because, you know, Will, I feel like now he's doing like bad. Talking Smith. Will Smith. Wow, dude. He's doing bad YouTube videos where he seems like he's trying to act like he's 20 year old or something. Okay, like he's doing like it comes to a sort of yeah, like like tiktok

He sort of like I'm doing the trend type thing right which is not I did a ice bucket challenge yesterday Guys got called out. Oh, yeah He waited yesterday. Did you challenge us? You guys got called out. Oh, yeah. Oh, wow. There's a challenge waiting for you. Oh, shit.

The ice bucket challenge from like four years ago, five years ago. Damn. Yeah. Maybe even longer. Maybe even longer. Eight years ago. It could be longer. Oh, shit.

The beer's on ice. The bucket's on ice, baby. Yeah, we got to start a new one. The scorpion bucket challenge. Okay. You just poured it. You just poured it. You just poured it. Okay. baby yeah we got to start a new one the scorpion bucket challenge it's a little edgier first stiff person syndrome hey do you want to beat stiff person syndrome do you like saline dion and do you want her to continue singing yes like a poor this bucket of scorpions on your skull okay bitch i do love that someone does that and they're like John Cena the rock and Steve Gutenberg and Cisco just hanging off your eyelid John Cena the rock and Cisco

Scorpions in my shirt in my shirt You remember that oh derse that's bad memories for you, right? No, it's not a bad memory. It's just Formative, you know like the movie hook, which is it's okay. You know, I got a new watch I went to I actually went to Vegas right before the Super Bowl Saw hello got a new watch Tracked it down. Their Rolexes are so hard to find that you have to buy a fucking plane ticket Travel somewhere to get it from

From somewhere else a dealer. Yeah, yeah, cuz I don't have a hookup in the great city of Los Angeles And if you're listening at home Adam just held up his wrist. He's got what is known popularly as a Batman GMT. Yeah, the blue and black. I'm a fancy bitch, you guys. A lot of people don't realize you look at me and you're like, that guy's not fancy. I do want to run the tape back when you were like, I'm not a Rolex guy. Remember that? Yeah. And what are you now just for clarification? I mean, a Rolex guy. Yeah, I do. I do want three of them now. Yeah. But that's right.

Yeah, yeah. Because you just got, that's pretty wiki-wow. You just got your birthday one. Yeah. My wife says it's pretty wiki-wiki-wow-wow. That I'm buying all these Rolexes when we're having a child. But that's the balance. A lot of people would say, yeah.

Okay. You got to ebb and flow. And then you get you say, I give it to Bo when he when he graduates preschool. That's that's what I said. That was yeah, that was the how I got away with it. I was like, I'm honey. That's cool.

I want to give it to my son when he's old enough to respect it, which will be would never on my deathbed. And he's he's like 60 years old. Dude, I want to buy a big screen TV. I'm going to give it to our boy. I give it to my son.

I got to give it to him. I need a new TV. I need a monster truck. Out of my field the same way. I'm like, I got this watch. I'm going to, you know what I'm going to do? I'm going to gift this to my boy. Or like, I, now I got to get two more.

Yeah. But at the same time, I'm like, favorites. So then my kids just just gonna be some like fucking 24 year old douchebag with a Rolex on his wrist. Like what? You lose! No, you can't, you absolutely can't give it to them when they're young.

And that's where I'm like, I'm gonna give it to my son. They get it when you die? Yes, immediately. They kill you for it. But when I'm like so old that if I put a watch as heavy on my Rolex as a Rolex on my arm. I can't lift my arm because I'm so old and right That's what I'm gonna gift him my Rolex when I'm so old and weak I can't like lift it up because it's too heavy Or it'll just like rip my skin because my skin is so paper thin and soft that it can't handle steel all

around my wrist. Gotcha, bitch! So that's the age I'm going to give a gift this to my son. But when I was there, dude, I was in the Rolex store. You know who was there? Who? You know who was there? Blow him up. You know who's there? Take a guess, Blake.

Owen Wilson. No. Okay. Good guess, though. Can I make a guess? Yes. Yes, you can. Did I tell you? No. Okay. All right did I tell you no?

Okay, all right. Are they in entertainment? Yeah, wait, let's do a 20 questions. Yeah, okay They are in entertainment. It was by the way, it was very cool It was not Cisco give it up Anna Anna in the chat was saying Cisco not Cisco. I wish are they are they Or film and television They were in music. That's a great question. They were in music. So it's not and it's not Cisco and now They are Huge in film. Oh, it's ludicrous. It is not ludicrous. Oh LL cool J Good guess, but not LL cool J. A lot of would say he's an a-list. It's a man He's an a-lister in film and he was oh

There you go Well, you guys actually guess that really well you were giving big and is he Was he getting What you got plus hella diamonds dude honestly? Yes, that's exactly what he got Yeah, I don't know if he was buying that or he was getting his service. I couldn't really can you walk us through that? I feel like this is a very elite thing. I'm like I don't know this scenario at all like what's going on by the way By the way, I've been in I've been in dozen Rolex stores just kind of looking at shit and you know flex I mean, I'm looking at shit. I'm not buying dozens or anyone can walk in the store Blake

You can walk in this. It's just in a mall. I cannot I guarantee I Guarantee I would be asked to leave the guy turned to away You're good. Yeah. I think you are looking for Quiznos. You're good. You're good. Take your Zoho. I believe there's a Jimmy John.

The football and cookies are that way. You must want it Mike's way. So take your Zoho and get the fuck out of here. Are you looking for Mike's way? Because it's that way. It's that way, bitch. Please get out of the store. Mike's way cuz it's that away that away bitch, please get out of the store So no I was in the back room like essentially

Signing the paperwork to buy the watch the back room is where they bring you to give you the watch that they don't want Anyone in the front to see that they actually do have to see that they actually have them in the back because they do and they tell everyone they don't they do have them they say they don't they do okay and they got it for me and I'm in the back room and then the guys like there's no one in this store right there's literally zero people and then And then the guy signing, he's like, oh, Mark Wahlberg is in the store. Are you friends with him? And I'm go, I've never met Mark Wahlberg. And he's like, well, he's out here.

Would you like to meet him? He's a nice guy. And I'm like, yeah. And I go out and whether he was lying or not, he goes, oh, man. Oh, yeah. There you go. I know, he's like, I know you.

I'm a big fan. And I'm like, sure. so hi to your mother for me Totally and he's a very nice guy, but had this watch That I didn't see exactly what watch it was, but he was covered covered in Dime wow one more time which one more time In diamonds Wow one more time which one more time Oh

Nice in diamonds. Uh, I don't like it. Okay. I'll say it not for me Yeah, that's not for me. I think Mark Wahlberg can pull it off He's a guy that you would expect I've covered be covered in diamonds sure if you yeah It wouldn't look good on me and met you know, I'm I I said in the past I'm not a Rolex guy I was just gonna say fast forward three years when you're like yeah it's a little diamond II okay I'm kind of a diamond II cut to three years after that I'm just I'm just soaking in time I feel like the podcast would have to go really well it For me to be covered in diamonds. It's up to the fans. Yeah.

We would need to jump in viewers. I will say that. Yeah, I feel like we would have to really level up our podcast game in order for me to be covered in diamonds. But super, super nice game. That's cool. The only Rolexes I'm interested in now, like the couple that I'm like, oh, those are fucking sick They're so expensive. They're so bad. Yeah, I three times the

Cost of what I have already that's too much. I have a feeling they're all very expensive And there's even more extra expensive. There's even more extra expensive. Yeah He did say he's like, oh, I'm a fan and then he's like we should work together But then in the same breath, he goes, uh, not. Psych. No, he said not quietly under his breath. I was like, what? What'd you say?

Psych your mind. Not. Psych. Not. Is your mind not? Uh, he goes, he goes, we've met before and I go. No. And then his friend's like, yeah, no, we met. His we met his friend was there. He's with two guys. Yeah, and his friend goes no at

Some golf club And he goes, oh, you're a big golfer, right? And I go no He's thinking Santino. No, he's not thinking Santino because I don't look anything like Santino and Santino. No, he's not thinking Santino because I don't look anything like Santino. Sean Astin? I think he might be Sean Astin. No, and then I said, I think you're thinking of just a basic looking white guy. Right. And then they all laughed and they were like, yeah, maybe. And I'm like, oh, he doesn't, he actually doesn't know who I am. So that was my experience with Mark Walbert. He said, he's a big fan. We got to work together And then said that we've maybe golfed together and I definitely haven't damn it dude Yeah, who would he think that your big golfer right? Maybe he thought you're Justin Timberlake. Oh

Yeah Yeah, I look like a Justin Timberlake he kind of he's so famous. He doesn't know who Justin Timberlake is or what he looks like. Huh. Yeah, huh. Just recently there was a video of when he was on he went on TRL at the same time as Eminem and Eminem was like, Oh, it's really cool to be here. All of us together feels like we're just one big happy funky bunch. Yeah. Oh, yeah, they had beef. And Mark Wahlberg is like fuming and And he's not, he's barely like talking because I think maybe Eminem. Wait, wait, wait.

Witnesses? This is like, this is. 2,000 TRL days. Oh, okay, okay. The good old days. Oh, so he was, he was shitting on Mark Wahlberg for being in the funky bunch kind of. Yeah, he, I mean, it was like a sly, a sly little dig.

And he'd already probably wrapped about how whack, white rappers were before him kind of thing. Yeah, I think there was some prior beef and then it was on the screen and then Eminem took that little jab. But Mark is not in a mood on TRL either. He's just there like not having fun at all. Yeah, promoting fear or something. Blake's favorite movie. I wonder what he was. Well, that's sick. Yeah, that movie.. That movie rocks. Yeah, that means it really gets it. It does rule. It's really really good. I'm in the house.

Yeah, I feel like he has to know that the Funky Bunch isn't cool. Like it wasn't like a cool thing. It was like, he was just him breaking into the industry, right? And then now he does. I would argue, I mean, maybe they are cool. Donnie D was on backup, drug free, so put the crack up. I'm I just Google imaged the funky bunch and they're pretty cool

looking. Yeah. Well they're wearing a lot of cross colors. Pretty funky. Okay. Yeah they look pretty funky. Oh what was their what was their main hit? The funky The good vibrations right? Oh yeah good vibrations. I mean it fucking cooks good song. Yeah, these like son kiss Many want to know who done this marky mark and I'm here to move you Rom's to groove to and I'm here to prove to you Damn, okay. All right had it had it in the vault had it in the ball I had a slow like have you seen her and song MC Hammer type? Slow join yeah, what was the song? Have you seen her and song MC Hammer type slow join? Yeah What was their song where Mark Wahlberg like fucked a chair? I feel like that in my little kid brain

I just remember like Mark Wahlberg fucking a chair Right, and then my parents being like, ah, maybe you don't watch this on MTV because Mark Wahlberg And then pointing the camera and saying Yeah, and then and he's pointing a camera and goes I've golfed with you and I'm like what's you on the links? We did I don't remember that there's one called wild side. Do you think that's it? Oh, yeah, this is where his samples take a walk on the wild side. Will you play 15 seconds of that matter? Right at the best but the best part, Blake, don't. Oh.

I'm gonna skip ahead. Try to sample it, but okay. I know this thing in Nickelodeon, Tales of Love. Ooh, I mean, it sounds sexy. It's fun. We're gonna have to revisit, you know. Yeah, you know what, I take it back.

They are cool. They're your favorite. The name might have been a little whack, the Funky Bunch. Yeah, but Funky, Funky was cool. Bunch? That's rough. Bunch is weird. The part yourself of a bunch is, because what else, what other bunches are there besides

Brady Bunch? Bananas. Yeah, banana bunches. You're thinking of banana bunches and Brady Bunches, absolutely. Yeah, what's a, what's a- You gotta go, what is the Funky Crew? Funky Crew. I feel crew.

Funky Squad. Funky Few. Yeah, Crew, Funky Squad, Funky Few. Yeah, oh, Funky Squad. Funky Unit, Funky Boys. Funky Boys. Well, Funky Boys would have been a better, yeah. Funky, Funky, Funky Dudes. Butlovens, Funky Butlovens. Funky Butlovens.

Funky Butlovens. Is that a bore? Yeah, it was. You know what, we might need to bring it back to the day. The Funky Butlovens. Yeah, what else could it be? It could be Marky Mark and Fuck I

Cannot find this day dude have a fucking and the and get your Marky Mark and the funky butt lovin Markey mark and the funky but lovin Would be so funny if he like pitched that to the group to his crew much from rookie of the year the bunch He's like hey, I'm thinking we could change it from a bunch to the but look Mark Markey Rowan Gardner and the funky but lovers hosting Gardner God where the hell is it? I cannot find it. Boy, you got to clean up that board, buddy.

You got to clean up that board. Um, that's a great sighting, great interaction. Yeah, man. That's cool. Yeah, that's a, that's a big one. And that's a big one, you know, cause we run into, I feel like you don't run into that level. There you go. Mark your mark.

You don't run into that level of celebrity very often. Yeah, that's he's he's he's out in the wild He's way up there out in the wild not not at a big party where you kind of expect to see some real famous people Yeah, I don't know. I feel like if you sat in a Rolex store all day, you might bump into some some A-listers I don't know. Yeah, yeah don't know how often you think. Yeah. Yeah. In Los Angeles or Vegas, maybe. Yeah.

Yeah. And is that what you did, Adam? I think what Blake's getting to is he wasn't. Adam works security. Were you working security? Were you working? I went and sitting there all day. Congratulations on your purchase, sir.

You can leave now. What up? I am Dramos host of the life as a gringo podcast. You can leave now. too much this while also never being enough that this is the podcast for you. Every Tuesday I'll be bringing you conversations around personal growth, issues affecting the Latin community and much more via my own personal stories along with interviews with inspiring thought leaders from our community. Then every Thursday I'll be tackling trending stories and current events from our community that you need to know. So much of what makes our community so beautiful is our diversity yet. Too often those of us who don't fit into this dumb stereotypical box of whatever it means to be Latino are left without a voice or just forgotten about.

On this show, I celebrate the uniqueness of our culture and invite you to walk in your authenticity. Listen to Life as a Gringo as a part of the Microtura Podcast Network available on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast or whatever you get your authenticity. Listen to Life as a Gringo as a part of the Microtoura podcast network available on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or whatever you get your podcasts. All that sitting and swiping, our backs hurt, our eyeballs sting. That's our bodies adapting to our technology. But we can do something about it. We saw amazing effects. I really felt like the cloud in my brain kind of dissipated. There's no turning back for me. Make 2024 the year you put your health before your inbox.

And take the Body Electric Challenge. Listen to Body Electric from NPR on the iHeart Radio app or wherever you get your podcasts. How could the most powerful man in media just vanish from public life? My name is Chris Moody, host of the new podcast Finding Matt Drudge. I'm a reporter who's covered politics for years, and in this podcast I'm going to travel far and wide searching for the reclusive Matt Drudge, the founder of the Drudge Report.

Along the way, I'll talk to people who've worked with him, dined with him, and fought with him, taking listeners into private conversations, all in an attempt to get a better understanding of who Drudge is and what motivates him. I'll also be chasing down tips from you, the listener, through a special hotline. So if you know where Drudge is right now or have a great Drudge story

that might help us better understand the mysterious media mogul, please give us a call at 301-200-2414. Hopefully by the time this show ends, the man who knows Drudge best, Matt Drudge himself, will break his silence and sit down with us. Listen to finding Matt Drudge on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Dude, it was a very fun alone trip. I feel like I've never done this. I flew to Vegas at 9 30 a.m. Okay, baller got a got a jack and coke at 9 30 a.m. Because I'm going to Vegas land and I'm there an hour early the woman who runs the

store was the one who wanted to give me the watch I'm drunk now. She was not there. So then I went to the Aria casino. Okay sat there I'm waiting to buy a watch. It was drinking beer watching NBA today, and then these guys recognized me. I took shots with these guys I was intoxicated then go into the Vegas store roll a pork meat whiskey I had like I had like three whiskies then I meet Mark Walbur Then I eat a cheeseburger drink another beer and and fly home. Hey, were you like fucking I get two watches? I want two watches And they're like you get the one you got one you're gonna like it you get the one but it was a very fun

Just self-trip. I was with no one I ran into a Bob Mennery. Oh, yeah, I with the alright with the voice. Yeah, how was he? How was that? It's fine. See back on that podcast now or is he from I don't understand is it promoting it again? I know I Have no idea about his lifestyle, but you know, nice guy and ran into him and then ran into Mark Wahlberg and called it a trip. Was home by 4pm. Was at my house at 4pm. Damn.

What time did you fly out? Like in the morning. 9.30. That's not bad. Is your jet setter and you need a GMT if you're a jet setter. Yeah. Yeah, that was a quick turnaround. I was like, dang, And it made me go like,

why am I not in Vegas often? Right. On John's. On just quick John's. Yeah. Why don't I just go like, you wake up in the morning, you go, I want to play Blackjack. Go there. Yeah. Play Blackjack. Come on. You just go to commerce, don't you? Isn't that where we could find you? No, that's sad. That's sad. You don't go there. Yeah, commerce is not cool. It's too bright. I think commerce is just for real gamers.

It's really into playing poker. It's not about a mood or anything. It's like straight down to business. That's like gambling as a job slash addiction. It's not about the mood. No, no, no, no. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I've never been in the actual card rooms in Vegas where they're all playing poker.

It seems way too serious for me. And I'm like, oh, I couldn't be this level of intense. Right. I think I would just not care and just go, I just take my fucking money. I'm not gonna sit here all goddamn day, you know? You're the kind of person they want at the table. Yeah, I think that's exactly table. That's exactly right. That's exactly. Yeah, I fuck it. I only want to be here for 20 minutes.

If I can't wait in 20 minutes, just yeah, here's all my money. I fold. That's that's why I like Blackjack because I'm like, me either winning big or I'm not. And then we're all in and then we're done. And then I'll wander around and drink some big beers and and have a great time. And it was the Thursday before the Super Bowl. So you felt the energy percolating.

It was fun. You felt, and you see the people that are drinking their coffees, like they had a night the night before. And then you see the people, it's 9.30 a.m. or 10 a.m. by the time I got there, 10.30. They're already drinking. You're like, these are my people right here. We're already fucking firing it up're like these are my people right here. We're already

firing it up. You guys are my people. You guys are my people. Do you guys ever play the slots or do you understand? I feel like those have gotten way too complex. I'd never know what's happening. Anytime I play a slot. Yeah, you're like, I got a four leaf clover, a mermaid, a horseshoe, and two diamonds, and I won like 75 cents. And you're like, how? I don't understand the draw. I don't know what people are doing. Is it that they're the cheapest thing?

I think that have something. I think you could sit there, you could slow play it, and then you get free drinks. Get free drinks, yeah. Okay, so it's like people who are paying like as little as possible to get the free drinks. But then sometimes, you know, I remember my parents' friends, they would go there and my parents would,

you know, they're not big gamblers. So the drinks are free this week? Just wanna cover that. The drinks are free now? I'm drawing them out. They would sit at the slots with their friends who like actually were playing the slot since spending hundreds of dollars trying to win money. Yeah. And my parents would sit there with them like slow playing like a quarter. Right. And then and then getting drinks with

them. And it's a workout. If you're if you pull it, you're kind of getting a little workout in. That's funny. Like that's funny. Fuck off. Pretty good joke. Fuck off. Fuck in. That's funny. Blake, that's funny. Fuck off. Ah! That's a pretty good joke. Ah, fuck off. Fuck off. That's also a workout. Funky butt lovin'! Did you guys see the video of the woman playing?

And she's like, dressed really nice. She has like an expensive looking bag, and she's dressed pretty nice. Pissing? Uh, no. Did you say pissing? Pissing. Sitting, playing, uh, the slots. Just... That's sad.

You can't leave. Not if you're on a run or a roll. Just hosing, dude. Hosing. What? I need to see this. Hosing out? Yeah. I'll find the video of it. Like dripping down her legs or... No, just like she's sitting on the edge here

Okay, it's just like she's fully pissed. Oh dear. Hmm. That's sad. It's wild and kind of cool Those are your people. I'm still gonna send it. You found your people. Those are those are my people I feel like people go to Vegas and they're like, I'm gonna be Like there's a certain group of people that go to Vegas and they're like I'm gonna be as gross as I can be like I'm gonna do all the nasty shit people right and those are my people I'm gonna come yeah yeah we're gonna get prostitutes we're gonna piss in the lobby yeah you guys pissed your pants like as adults in like a drunken way yeah I pissed this is years ago maybe 10 years ago I used to do with my buddy Walsh and Zach I would do one day vacays where I would take us on a little vacation for one day and then so I I

Took us all to San Francisco and just one day where we just go there we party for one day people a K And we you know we're sharing a hotel room, you know, Walsh has a car, we have two beds in there. I get so drunk that I pissed my pants. I've never pissed my pants before, but I pissed my pants. I'm pissed now! Like when you were sleeping or like when you were out?

Yeah, okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. When I was sleeping, when I was sleeping. Okay. And then I woke up but naked from my waist down that's cool on top of the cuffs so my dicks out my buttholes out Zach and Walter are there sleeping in their beds and I'm like did my best friends but fuck you're people because I'm not I'm not wet at this point nothing's wet I'm just butt naked and I don't know where my pants are and I'm like your people because I'm not I'm not wet at this point. Nothing's wet I'm just butt naked and I don't know where my pants are

And I'm like I think my people just butt fucked me So I Put the blankets over me and then the next morning I woke up like hey guys, did you butt fuck my people, right? Hey like you're my people straight up Hey, like you're my people. Straight up. Like, you know you're my people. Nothing's gonna change that. I thought you guys were my people, but then you guys maybe but fuck me.

And did they think maybe like, well, you brought us out here. Like, what were we here for? We're obviously your people. So they, and then the next morning they they were like no you you pissed your pants One day vacation what oh we thought you said one gay vacation like Yeah You're gonna want to brush your teeth too, but evidently I piss I pissed my pants and then I Stood up on top of the bed

and peeled my pants and underwear off. These are done. Threw them against the wall and then laid back down on the bed is the story that they're going with. I kind of think maybe they butt off but you know we'll never get to the bottom of it because I was a blackout drunk But either way epic night dude epic night with two of your besties your people Up until then I think we had a pretty epic night. I knew that question would take ten minutes. What else what else? What did have you guys I mean because those one day vacations they got I mean they were too wild those one day vacations they got Too wild those one day vacation. They were too wild because we really your packet at all in one day We would land and then it was just aggressively drinking. Mm-hmm all day. That's dangerous You've got a shot clock like that's that's hard all day. There was no like we're chilling we're getting at the hotel

We're gonna relax a little you know how you normally would want would do. Yeah. You want to get something to eat? They're wrapped in their minds. They're like, when does it get gay? I don't know. Fuck it. Should we, is it later? This is weird. He doesn't want to stay in the hotel.

When does he want us to, do we initiate? They're like, wait until he's black out and then we, but fuck it. What the heck is going on with our guy here? Hey, he stood up in bed and took his pants off. I think this is our cue. He said, go get foot longs. I'm thinking it's our chance. But I've only got a He said he couldn't handle a footlong. I think I know his song. Yeah, I only got a six incher. I got a Jimmy John's nine incher.

I'm gonna give it to him. Mike's way. Oh, baby. I'll do it my x-way. Yeah. Sounds like you got way old. I've never pissed my pants drunk, but I did have like the flu one time. Rub it in. And was in bed and just started the sheets.

Oh. Oh. Like I thought it was just kind of like, I'm letting two down. It's just me. I'm just letting the two down. It's just me. I'm just letting it to to yeah Yeah, and then I was like to Had to gather myself You had to gather the sheets probably have you ever because I've had friends and family members do this and I've never done this

Just wake up and then piss Somewhere in the house that isn't the toilet right in like a corner on like isn't the toilet. Right, in like a corner, on like a floor. Goodbye. Yeah, just like piss on the shoes. You've done that? No, I've never done that, but I have friends who are like, oh, and don't step there. And I'm like, because what?

And they're like, I pissed right there. And you're like, Remember at Packard, fucking Adam came over and one night he was so drunk he opened, not you at me Adam Allegedly, but he opened up our cupboard and he pissed in that right in like our big box of ramen noodles Oh, yeah, I do remember that and then it then it was a real conversation because we it was a big box

because we it was a big box. It was a lot of ramen noodles expensive. It was months of rations. It was a real and they are packing. They are pretty tightly. So it was a real conversation. So you were like, do we just rinse and repeat? Yeah. Yeah, we're like, there's a lot of ramen here.

Are we going to throw away this ramen? How much did you pass? It was a lot. The box was, it was filled up. Like they were floating. was filled up They were floating Packs of ramen were float. I don't know if we ever did throw it away and I do feel like we caught somebody It's been long enough they're like, oh man, I forgot how good these beef ramen are they're extra salty that's a lot of sodium now is that's a beef bouillon baby I'm microwaving this shit it smells like some socks got microwaved okay or we're just

broken up over like ah fuck it man I gotta eat I know these are the piss romans but it'll boil off I don't remember us if I don't I would hope we threw it away, but I do remember it being like a real conversation that we had where we're like, I think we should throw it away. Really? Well, they are packaged. They are packaged. Yeah. Well, maybe the ones in the back we can say. Yeah.

So did you make, allegedly, did you make a wand? Allegedly. Rinse these off or was this like he left? No. And then this is the aftermath? I honestly can't remember. Is this he left and then this is the aftermath. I honestly can't remember Is this the shade? Yeah, I believe we like kind of found it after he had already left and it was like wait did you piss in the cupboard and then it was like oh

I cannot confirm it's crazy Yeah, isn't it crazy how people people they do they like open a thing thinking that's the door to the bathroom. You're on automatic. But then the door isn't like they don't walk in like I've had people piss in the closet before right. Right. And they piss all over shoes and you're like, well, I'm not

going to throw shoes away. What? So you end up washing shoes and then the shoes never fit the same aren't you throwing those shoes away no no not at this point in my life these are dogs those are gone not at this point not at this point in my life no I mean and now I would probably throw some shoes away but at this point in my life I'm not throwing shoes away same how am saying, how am I going to afford to buy more shoes? Honestly, I'm collecting. You owe me shoes.

You owe. What if they're like, yo, I got it, dude. Then I go, what size are you? And not the right size. They're not, they're not the right size. No, no, no. Then I piss in their shoes and I go, I guess neither of us got them. Well, I feel like that person's going to wear that slide.

And that would be fair. No, dude, if someone pisses in my shoes, I go like that person's gonna wear that's life And that would be fair. No, dude if someone pisses in my shoes. I I I go you're responsible. Sorry Disaster my guy. That's and that's probably correct. I didn't I just wash those shoes You can watch if I pissed in somebody's shoes and they were like, come on man. I go I'll sort it I'll figure it out. I'll I'll get you sure. I I'll make it happen I'll charge you to the game you take responsibility. Yeah, okay But what if like you piss on Adam's Rolex and he's like, oh shit. I go I go Adam I'll take that one And I'll I'll figure out a way to get you the same one in the meantime. I'll definitely just take that one

We get that pissed on broke Rolex would Will it break if you piss on it? No, it's waterproof to 100 meters. And it says to my middle aged son, it says to my middle aged son, Bo on the back. I have that in great. I'll get to work. I'll get to work on that. If you can pry it off my cold dead arm, you can have it.

Blake, did you ever, were you a big pisser? I can't remember if you ever pissed on anything. I feel like you were. I feel like it's kind of on brand, right? I feel like maybe you still do. No, I wasn't. I do feel like I did it recently where I passed out on my carpet and I pissed it,

but I was not a big piss my pants got. I was like, yes! That's what we're talking about. Yeah, what? Recently, dude, every story that we've been telling is like a decade old. A decade old! Yeah, no, this was like fairly recently, I want to say, but I'm not a big pissed my pants guy. I've always been very proud of him.

Well, not a nice dude. Hey, by the way, Blake, I'm not a big, I did it once, and I told the story. I've had friends who pissed their pants a lot. I know, I have a homie who, it was kind of his thing so much so that he knew how to clean it up properly. And he was like, do you have this spray? This is the one that works the best?

You would wake up with new shoes at the edge of your bed Right in a prepare bowl of ramen. Yes. Yeah. Enjoy Enjoy oops. I did it again. Oops. I pissed it again. It was kind of what happened constantly Yeah, some people it's like he knew he shouldn't sleep in someone's bed. He would sleep on like the floor Yeah, oh wow the bath well and I have that like awareness when you're that level drunk. That's huge. Courtesy. It's a common courtesy. Because that level drunk is you, you don't know what you're doing.

The fact that you know that you have to sleep on the floor. And I like that Blake just always sleeps on the floor. So you were sleeping on the floor. Just in case. That is not why I sleep on the floor. Blake, when we lived together, you'd catch him just sleeping in the hallway and you'd be like, homie. I like to sleep under tables.

Yeah, under tables. I had a roommate once who he liked to sleep in like his laundry pile. That's hot. You know? And I kind of- Like dirty laundry? No, maybe. I guess maybe it was.

But if it's late and I have like new laundry And I just am too tired to fold it and I throw it on the bed I kind of like the coziness of like being enveloped by a bunch of other socks and clothes and shit I do too. It feels good. I like to lay in lots of materials like a big towel Just put a little hand on a towel. No, I'd rather wake up and take my friends butt fucked me. And that's all I'm into that. What up? I am Dramos, host of the Life as a Gringo podcast. Now, this is a show for the no sabo kids, the 200%ers. Here we celebrate your otherness and embrace living in the gray area.

If you ever felt like you were always too much this, while also never being enough that, this is the podcast for you. Every Tuesday, I'll be bringing you conversations around personal growth, issues affecting the Latin community, and much more via my own personal stories, along with interviews with inspiring

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I mean, I feel like there's two types of people. There's the type, I feel like I'm- I love sentences that start like- Thank you. There's two types of people. I feel like there's people that piss. There's people that shit. And piss and pu people that piss. And there's people that shit. And piss and puke. No. And there's people that like go on many adventures and you're like

afraid that they're gonna like sleep in someone's backyard or they're gonna just be lost. There's no other type of person. No. You're either someone who's like in a backyard on an adventure or you're pissing everywhere and if you're saying you're neither one, you're fucking lying, dude. Lying. You're a murderer. You're a serial killer.

Oh, you don't go on benedicts? Well, I guess you must piss all over every or maybe or you call somebody that maybe you shouldn't call. Oh, drunk dialer. So there's three types of people. Maybe there's a turns out that maybe there's three types of people. Right. You're out Maybe there's three types of people right you're a drunk dialer maybe I mean yeah, I get drunk face times all the time But yeah, what do you mean? Are you drunk right? Yeah? We yeah

I do I drunk we drunk FaceTime you at the Super Bowl just a few weeks ago Yeah, that's true But yeah, but like really like drunk dialing someone not FaceTime just to like to tell them how much you love them I feel like that doesn't happen anymore. Well, it's because we're old. I feel like 22 year olds are, I mean, imagine how embarrassing that is. Like if you're drunk, like, you know, everyone has done like a drunk call that maybe they're a little embarrassed about, but like drunk FaceTiming and, and the girl like your ex girl or whatever is like, this just sees you that drunk.

Like that's extra embarrassing. Maybe people go drunk live. Oh yeah, I mean, for sure people who go drunk live. I wish we did that more. Let's go drunk live on Instagram a whole bunch. Yeah, go for it. I would love that. Canceled.

And you then canceled. No, I'm gonna say nice things. But I think a drunk dial is like weird because people don't even call sober anymore. Yeah, they don't nobody picks up. So somebody calls me, I assume they're drunk because they're already like on some other shit. Yeah. Or they're or someone died. Yeah, yeah. Whenever I get a Blake or a Tiba FaceTime, I'm like 100 percent. They're drunk. Yeah. I'm drunk now. Yeah.

They're drunk. Sure. And I actually always pick it up because I'm like These guys are all just in a good mood. Let's see what they have to say. These are your people Hey, man, I just my pants Let's see what these guys have to be love you have to say they have to say there's something to say so much So they're FaceTime in me. Let's see what these guys have to be. I love you. They have to say, they have to say, they have something to say, so much so, their FaceTime in me, let's see what they gotta say. Adam, I just pissed my pants and the Tiba's out wandering around. I love you dudes.

He's sleeping in somebody's backyard. I love you, dude. Oh my God. Hey, I just woke up and I, I just woke up and I think my friend's butt fucked me. I love you, dude. What are you doing? Where are you? Where are you where are you? I'm where are you? Yeah, home. I'm obviously in my bed

I'm on the couch. I'm in bed. What I'm here. Where are you? I'm actually rewatching game of thrones. Where are you? Game of Thrones, where are you? I don't know. I don't know. This is the way. I can't help you. Man, holy shit. Are you guys bummed that a couple weeks ago? Um.

The guy who invented Popdarts died. Are you bummed on that? Did he? Yeah. At 96, the guy who invented pop darts passed away. Was that hurt you guys? Now, isn't Jerry Seinfeld doing a pop tart movie? What? Yes. Yeah. So do we think possibly big pop tart he had him murdered to make a audition for that? And I was like, that was pretty good. I'm going to be in this movie. And they didn't didn't like me. They might have liked you.

You might have been on a list. I auditioned. Yeah. No, I know, I know you auditioned, but maybe you're, you're top two or three. And you didn't make the final cut, but you still did a good job, Anders. Yeah. I always just, I guess I'm just too tall. I guess that's what it is.

Yeah, that's just too tall, too handsome. I guess I was great and perfect, but just too tall for the frame. Yeah, you're like, I guess my jawline was too good too Tall to be a pop tart. It's it sucks. So what can you give us any insight on this pop tart? You didn't get it so fuck them, right? Yeah, maybe yeah, maybe you spill some it was it was a funny scene or at least like I've had fun now is this like Blackberry or like the Uber show that they're explaining like how Pop-Tart came to be? Yes, there was a race. There was a race between a couple brands to bring the Pop-Tart to market.

And it was like Kellogg needed to do it first. Like, I want to say they both had the same idea, but it was about bringing it to market. Market. do it first. Like, I want to say they both had the same idea, but it was about bringing it to market. Todd just sent us a link that will for sure negate what I just said. Unfrosted the Pop-Tarts story. Bo Bowman. Okay. Who's the person making it?

Yeah, we know him. We like the name. He likes it more. I do love the name. Ooh, I'm seeing big names. Jim Gaffigan. Oh, James Marsden definitely got you. Yeah, oh dude, was it James Marsden? Oh, sure. Or it could have been Max Greenfield.

Or Jack McBrair. No, I feel like the people that Ders goes up against in this list, it's Max Greenfield. Actually, it might have been Bobby Moynihan. Maybe maybe Dan Levy. It could have been. Or Christian Slater. Could have been.

It might have been Bobby Moynihan, because it was kind of like a goofy assistant type guy. Got you. Or like second in command to like the important person, like who just kind of gets yelled at. This is a huge cast. Yeah, big, big time. There's a lot of big stars in this. I mean, Seinfeld, it's everybody wants to be part of it. at this is a huge cast yeah big big there's a lot of big stars in this

I mean Seinfeld it's everybody wants to be part of it and this is big time. We'll see hey We'll see if it's another B movie, you know. Oh my gosh I like this guy just I mean Seinfeld he doesn't make some weird choices when he's like I'm gonna come out of retirement for this My I only do stand up and I'm not gonna do any other show and then he drops the B movie Which I don't know if I saw it or not. It could have been good, but it is so kind of I don't believe it was a smash I don't believe it was something that resonated. I feel like we would have seen B2. Yeah. Yeah, yeah The hive yeah that what comes the hive yeah And then and then now just pop tart right it's science

Dude when I was on all kinds of pain pills after my surgery my last surgery Actually the first one in August the first my first hip surgery. I mean shit. Uh, I Watched the foods that built America and it's this the I'm so fucking hungry foods that built America. And it's this, the, I'm so fucking hungry. It's amazing. It's like the people that built America, the foods that built America,

there's like a whole thing that, that history channel does. But it's all about like Kellogg's and Hershey and this and that. And they do make your seams so fucking intense and cool. And I'm like, so maybe I'm gonna be a huge fan of this Pop-Tart movie. I don't know. What's your favorite Pop-Tart flavor?

Dude, here we are. Are you a Pop-Tart boy? And we're back. Come on, give it to me, man. I wanna know. And this is why Hollywood. I wanna know what's your move. I've had an evolution where for sure, for years,

it was frosted like strawberry. Yep, with the rainbow sprinkles. Then strawberry, I think is the classic. Then as I aged it became, ooh, what do we call it? Like the cinnamon one. Okay. Yeah, the maple cinnamon or whatever.

Maple cinnamon. Or brown sugar. Brown sugar, thank you, brown sugar. And then I harkened back. And I, I'm a s'mores guy now. Oh. Oh God. Dessert first. Yeah. I haven't had one since I was a s'mores guy now. Oh, oh, God. Dessert first.

Yeah. I haven't had one since I was a kid, but I remember those taste in like chemicals, dude. I guess they all do. Check this out. Yeah, but Blake, your palate is garbage. The s'mores pop tarts taste like ass. Yeah, well, your palate is garbage. Well, I feel like they taste like s'mores.

S'mores and s'mores is pretty good. I can see you being like so picky as a kid that you're like, Eugh, chocolate and marshmallow together, yucky! Right, exactly. I only eat mac and cheese and hot dogs in it, and that's it! The cause of diarrhea. Adam, I was like, Lee, is Blake talking right now? I was like, it's science.

I do a good young Blake impression. Oh, yeah. Yuck, something that isn't the only thing I like to eat. Yuck. Oh, mom, get on my face. Just a real quick tangent. We had a kid over the other day, like a friend, and we were like, hey, we're getting, we're having pizza for lunch.

You have a child friend? My kids. It's a baby. Oh, okay. All right. Hey, I had to clear it up because Kyle's over there eating babies. Because Kyle is eating babies. I walk by a school, it's playing a piccolo, and the children follow me back in my house. Hot, hot, hot, hot.

Had a kid over, and we go rent pizza for lunch. And he's like, oh, what kind? Pizza, pizza. And I go, cheese pizza. The safest possible pizza option. What kid doesn't like cheese pizza? And he goes, ah. That's the kind? Pizza, pizza. And I go, cheese pizza. The safest possible pizza option. What kid doesn't like cheese pizza? And he goes, oh. That's the only thing Blake would eat.

I don't like cheese pizza. I go, oh, like you like pepperoni? He goes, no, I get pizza without the cheese. That's how my family orders it. Gotcha, bitch. And I was like, we're in a whole other level. He took the cheese off and he just eats the bread and the sauce that is why I hate him I don't want to dunk I don't want to dunk on this kid but is

he like super is this like a super like Hollywood-y type fan or not even Hollywood-y like a health-conscious type family that that they're like the dairy of the cheese no no I think it's just like a super picky child. Persnickadiness. Oh, that'd be rough. I was not that I was a little garbage can and I still am. You're eating pizza pop tarts. Yeah. So Adam, what's your pop tart flavors?

And then I would love to hear hot or cold. What the preference is. If you're eating, I mean, either way, you're going to get worms if you eat cold pop tarts. That's disgusting. What the problem is, if you're I mean, either way, you're going to get worms if you eat cold poptars. That's disgusting. What? What? Dude, have you? You can't eat cold poptars. You gotta get worms, bro. No worms. You think worms live in processed fucking packaged goods like that? You have to toast the poptar. There's going to be. To kill the worm. To kill the worm. Oh my, oh my God. Oh, this is gross.

Oh, you got a toast. I will say, I did not eat a cold pop tart until I think I went on some like camping trip and somebody, then the guides or whatever brought boxes of pop tarts and I was like, how are we supposed to heat them? He's like, you don't have to heat pop tarts. And I ate it and I was like, oh, legit. It's just like a cookie. Yeah, okay

Except pretty good worms. Yeah, it's delicious. I think my mom would put that in my like lunchbox. She's like here you go Yeah, I think I didn't heat pop tarts for years, but I will say when you circle back, and you heat it very good Hey worth doing it. It's good. We're doing it, but the risk of burning it. Oh Yeah, because the like burn like it cooked cooked to burn It's like a 30-second window that you got to grab that fucker. Yeah, it's like diffusing a bomb that's it's important Now here's here's my question for you guys I don't have a child yet, and I won't have a child that's eating pop tarts for a few years now Shit you better get a pop tart in that mouth immediately.

Do you, I mean, this is because you have had children for a decade and you've been eating pop tarts. Was there a gap that you weren't eating pop tarts? Cause I haven't eaten a pop tart and I want to say 25, 30 years. My kids don't like pop tarts period. So you're buying pop tarts just for yourself. every once in a while when I see a wild ass flavor I buy it gotta try it. Wow. That's wild. Yeah, I gotta I gotta try apple pie banana cream pie They have like apple jack apple pies

Apple jacks peanut butter. None of them are good by the way. They're all bad the whole thing now They have they're like cross pollinating with other shit, you know? They're like, Cocoa Puffs Pop-Tart, and you're like, I might have to puff, puff, pass. Okay. And they're like, Macaroni and Cheese Pop-Tart. And you're like, this is just a hot pocket, bitch. Jolly Rancher. Yeah.

It's pretty gross. Adam gets really revved up about this. I'm like, motherfucker, this is, they're like, Pepperoni and Cheese Pop-Tart. I'm like, bitch, you, this is, they're like pepperoni and cheese pop tart. I'm like, bitch, you're a hot pocket. Okay. Adam, show him the tattoo. Show him the hot pocket tat. Because I fuck up some hot pockets. Yeah. That's my shit. Remember when we were in Columbus and there was just like stacks of hot pockets backstage and we're like, whoa, how did they just know exactly what I

wanted to snack on? Not diarrhea. very good. Yeah, but then with that said, we threw it into the audience and no one hated it. Did they like frisbee the box into somebody's face? Dude, man, yes, you did. And then they sent us hot ones, hot pockets. Did you guys eat those? The hell of spicy hot pockets?

Did not get those, did not receive those. I didn't eat those the hella spicy hot pockets did not get those did not receive those I didn't get those. Oh you guys dodged a bullet cuz that was the cause No Maybe you've got a weak Constitution oh, man. Oh tell me That was the car you've got a weak stomach homie dude. No hot pockets I fuck with but these were the hot ones hot pocket hot pockets. They were so fucking spicy It was weird

It was weird dude it lit my shit up Well, it's because it was Columbus is where hot pockets is is located. Okay. And the fact I mean, you got to rep hot pockets if you live in Columbus. Absolutely. That's a company direct call. Yeah. And the fact that you say it gives you diarrhea, it makes me question your whole stomach and your bowels. The fact that you can't process hot pockets because they're fucking delicious. Right. I said, you don't even know the hot pockets I'm talking about I'm talking about the hot ones hot pockets. Well, no, but hey, hey Earlier

Earlier you're not being very wiki-waka because earlier the diarrhea you said yes the cause of diarrhea when I mentioned hot pockets Yeah, I was just you know, I was just kind of girly mood. Like, yeah. I'm in a go. Okay. So you don't, so it doesn't, it doesn't give you diaries. What you're saying? No, I can, I actually, I haven't had a hot pocket in a while. I'm not sure. No, no, no, no, come on. So you eat Pop Tarts more often, you would say, than hot pockets. I'm not saying I eat hot pockets all the time.

I don't eat any toaster food. In my 20s, in my 20s, fucking than hot pockets. I'm not saying I eat hot pockets all the time. I don't eat any in my 20s. In my 20s, fucking up hot pockets. Really fucked them up. Oh yeah, I had a lot of hot pockets as a youngster. I don't reach for the hot pockets anymore. I used to try the Philly cheesesteak one. I don't think I've ever I think I've had one to four hot pockets in my life. There was a minute where I was smashing on them. And if you didn't heat them up all the way, the cheese was just one little couple of nerds in it.

It was wild, dude. Couple nerds. You know nerds. I'm like, you know. You don't know what a nerd is. Hey, man, none of us are fucking chef cordon blues. What the fuck is a nerd? None of us graduated from Long Beach State. It's a little I think it's a little turd a nerd. Yeah. Yes

Okay, please please look up nerd and have it be a thing that makes sense to us I'm telling you and that's any RT any RT. I don't know. I've never spelt it out a nerd Yeah, that's it it says, um, it just skull and crossbones my computer. It just locks me up. Oh boy. Yeah. Um, well, it's not, it's not saying what I think it is, but a NIRT is the San Francisco fire department NIRT training. So you just, we pulled it from somewhere. Yeah. You pulled it from somewhere. The deep little back part of your brain. Yeah.

No, this can't be something I made up, dude. I'm telling you, this is a real thing somewhere. Okay, any takebacks? I'm sorry. I apologize. Are we there yet? We are. We are.

Did you guys ever do like the breakfast, the heat and eat breakfast sandwiches? What is that now? Well, just like the Jimmy Dean's like style breakfast sandwiches. I feel like that was more of sure. Yeah Those are respectable. Yeah, those are a little classier. Yeah, yeah, I feel like that's a man's a man's breakfast the like biscuit sausage Things yeah, that's respectable. Yeah, I've and this is when you were a child Yeah, and or in my 20s. I'd be like, I'm gonna grab one of these for like a breakfast on the go. I think your family might have done a little better than

our families and they could afford the we were dirt people. Yeah, families were dirt people. And hot pockets was a real delicacy for me. I remember my mom not wanting to get hot pockets because she's like, these are things are kind of expensive. And I'm like, I'm like, just get me some hot pockets. She was like, these not pockets are half the price. You gotta try and not pocket bro. Yes. Well, dude, I mean, imagine, I mean, if there was knockoffs, we would have gotten that I got poop tarts.

Poop tarts. I'm gonna go to poop tarts. If you don't tell us, then you get worms. Any takebacks, any apologies apologies any epic slams for this I feel like we've been so well behaved with Kyle gone. There's like no one to make fun of and no one to really dunk on No one to shit on like question their entire lifestyle Yeah, yeah, I think we're just kind of questioning Blake's lifestyle sometimes every once in a while I admit that my best friend's butt fucked me right, but But that's just par for the course. That's just who I am as a person, you know, yeah, and that's it's respect

Mm-hmm. I would like to give a okay. Go ahead unless you're not done go ahead No, would you like to take back saying nerd? Because that's what I want from you, but I know that is real and I will find it I need I need the citizens of TI nation to come to my defense there. That is okay because that we just use Google We just Google which is a very powerful source This is off the grid Adam come on now. Oh, yeah Blake's got his ear to the fucking nerds this is some Bay Area shit bro dude I can make up like a term that means something we yeah a wambly is a tiny little shit a wambly a little wambly and then TI nation would be like yeah

wambly do you think that's a good name for a little tiny piece of shit no I thought wambly's were titties no those are Whammy's or Wambos. Come on. Okay, wait. It's okay. I want to give a special shout out to Frosted Wild Berry Pop Tarts. Remember they were purple with the little blue swirls on them? Those shits changed the game.

I didn't like how they tasted, but the aesthetic of that pop tart was beautiful. Right. You would just hold one to match an outfit Maybe yeah, I would wear it as a purse to school. It was really cool. Check out my accessories. I got the blue razz pop tart the matches the laces on the shoes some people buy Rolexes some people buy pop tarts, okay? You want to take that back yet or no? Is that your take back? What if I got a diamond encrested pop tart around my neck?

It never had it so good. Oh yeah. Was this another episode of? That is another episode of this. This is important. Oh, there it is! It is important! Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun Oh there it is! Come on, come on!

Can you feel it, baby? Let me see that blank mark. I feel it too. Donny D on the back up. Drug freeze up at the crack up. Come on, come on. show us big risk can yield big rewards like Rob Riley, the creative head of one of the world's leading advertising firms. I try to create environments where anybody can say anything without any judgment.

Listen to a brand new season of math and magic on our very own iHeart Radio app, Apple podcast or wherever you get your podcast. Hi, I'm Vanessa Bayer and this is my brother Jonah. And we are so excited to have you hear the latest season of our nostalgia theme podcast, How Did We Get Weird? Not only do you get to know me and my brother, you get to know the stories that made us the absolutely rad people we are today. Check out our episodes where we've welcomed hilarious guests like our friend Andy Samberg.

That's it, that's really it! And Queen Casey Wilson. I really went cart before the horse. I said, I think I have an opportunity to interview Leonard As a high school student and you do not want to miss out on our funny segments like change.org Change.org and congratulations. You played yourself Congratulations. You played yourself listen to our podcast. How did we get weird on the iHeartRadioApp, Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcasts. What up?

I am Dramos, host of the Life as a Gringo Podcast. This is a show for the no sabo kids, the 200%ers. Here we celebrate your otherness and embrace living in the gray area. Every Tuesday I'll be bringing you conversations around personal growth, issues affecting the Latin community, and much more than every Thursday I'll be tackling trending stories and current events from our community. Listen to Life as a Gringo on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.