This Is Important - Ep 253: Adam vs. 30 Naked Chix

Episode Date: June 24, 2025

Today, this is what's important: Blake's chair incident, I Love Lucy, Adam's Karen story, school pick up / drop off, filming locations, hypothetical situations, Isaac's birthday, Hooters, cruise culture, & more.  Click here for more information about the This Is Important Cruise.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is an iHeart podcast. I know a lot of cops, they get asked all the time, have you ever had to shoot your gun? Sometimes the answer is yes. But there's a company dedicated to a future where the answer will always be no. This is Absolute Season One, Taser, Incorporated. I get right back there and it's bad. Taser, Inc. I get right back there and it's bad. Listen to Absolute Season 1, Taser, Inc. on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever

you get your podcasts. Why is a soap opera western like Yellowstone so wildly successful? The American West with Dan Flores is the latest show from the Meat Eater podcast network. So join me starting Tuesday, May 6th, where we'll delve into stories of the West and come to understand how it helps inform the ways in which we experience the region today. Listen to The American West with Dan Flores on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Over the years of making my true crime podcast, Helen Gone, I've learned no town is too small for murder. I'm Katherine Townsend. I've heard from hundreds of people across the country with an unsolved murder in their community. Helen Gone I was calling about the murder of my husband. Catherine Townsend The murderer is still out there. Katherine Townsend Each week, I investigate a new case. If there's a case we should hear about, call 678-744-6145. Listen to Hell and Gone Murderline on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Sometimes as dads, I think we're too hard on ourselves. We get down on ourselves on not being able to, you know, we're the providers, but we also have to learn to take care of ourselves. A wrap-a-way, you gotta pray for yourself, as well as for everybody else, but never forget yourself. Self-love made me a better dad because I realized my worth. Never stop being a dad.

That's dedication. Find out more at fatherhood.gov, brought to you by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services and the Ad Council. Welcome to This Is Important, a production of IHAR Radio, the show where we talk about what's obviously most critically, crucially important. Today on This Is Important... You motherfuckers smoke weed? Hey, no drum is here, just low-cook juice. Man, come on, why you gotta do me like that?

Let's go! Blake you fell out of your chair when you did the clappy? Oh my god! What happened dude? What happened? You fell out of your chair when you did the clappy What happened buddy you clap so hard you snapped your chair my chair just snapped Also, why you have a glass chair as your computer. No, it's like like vintage plastic Holy shit, dude Hang on's like vintage plastic. Holy shit, dude. Hang on a second. Vintage plastic?

Yeah. What is your heritage, bruh? Damn. This is the oldest plastic on the market. It's vintage plastic from 2012. From the Mayflower. Maybe it's not vintage. It just straight up snapped.

That looks like super spiky. Yeah, so what are you going to do now? Because we do have a podcast. This happened at second one. Second one. I could stool it. Dude, it literally happened on the clap stool. Oh my god.

So what happens, what had happened was- Jesus. At the beginning of the podcast we do a clap so they know when to sync our sound mm-hmm and Blake claps so viciously hard like all chairs snapped in half hold up Yeah, is that what it was a whole like Bruce Banner out here. What the hell God like it if you're watching YouTube we're gonna show it to you. I hope we got that on camera because I went head over heels.

That was ass over end. Is that what they say? Ass over tea kettle. Tea kettle. Yeah, what does that mean? Let's get into it. This is a hot one. Just some cool mom was like,

he was ass over tea kettle. People were like, yeah mom. Okay mom. Nice mom. I don't know, mom. Okay mom. Nice mom. I don't know, she's drunk again. And then she went right back in the kitchen with one of those doors that goes back and forth. My grandma had those, my god, how often.

Like the saloon doors. Saloon doors, yeah. Bar's open baby. Are we talking double doggies? Or are we talking one? I think Lucy had those and I love Lucy if I'm not mistaken. It was one. It was one. Oh, okay I'm I'm almost positive but then again, I'm not well versed in my Lucy You know what I mean? The way you the way you led with just Lucy

I was like hey, but I'm with you now. Well, you know why it's because we spoke about it last week I did watch the Pee Wee You know why? It's because we spoke about it last week. I did watch the Pee-wee documentary, and he mentions how he was a Lucy fan, and I was like, wait, how was a big Lucy fan back in the day? Everyone was. She was amazing. Oh, everyone was. It was the biggest show on television.

That's great. I gotta watch it again. It's been so long. The format of sitcoms is based on that show. Yeah, and she was hella funny. And hot. And I think we talked about it back in the day how hot she was. She was really banging. It's science. I thought she was a hottie. She was a red-headed banger. And I didn't think so when I was a kid just because it was like in black and white and it was

old. So you're like oh that's old. That's old. This is the way you didn't watch Patty. I like my I like my women full of silicone. Yeah, we know this is the 90s. Right. And Jennifer Love Hewitt. We're still horny from last week. Oh my God. You only like to watch Tool Time within Home Improvement. That's the only show I liked was the show within the show. Wait, how who were all the Tool time girls? Cuz I think it originally and I'm like I think it was Carmen Electra at first but didn't it switch or was it Pamela Anderson Pam Anderson? It was Pam Anderson for chisel, but then it switched to Carmen Electra. Is that real? I don't think it's Carmen Electra. Are you just making shit shit up dog Oh, but they did switch to a brunette girl. I believe was it Kathy Ireland. Yeah, I remember I remember being way into her. I was so into Kathy Ireland. Yeah

She was just a human cat. Yeah, you're like, I think I want to fuck a cat She had me on the streets looking for cats Todd is saying Debbie old Debbie saying old Debbie Dunning. Debbie Dunning. Oh my god. By the way, look at Debbie Dunning. Okay. None other than Debbie Dunning.

I'm gonna come. She played Heidi. Whoever swooped up Debbie Dunning, you're so stoked. Yeah. God damn. If she's a good person, which just looking at her, you could tell she is. Pure evil. You could tell she is.

Yeah. Wow. She looks fantastic in her eye Wikipedia the workbook god damn yeah what's the work boot the boot barn looking like a boot barn ad I mean absolutely she's got some caterpillars on I love it mmm it seemed like they're cat caterpillars right mmm I'd like to wrap her in a cocoon and I don't know if I talked about this the other day But I had a run-in with a what the kids used to call Karen's do they still call?

Kind of crazy women Karen. Oh, yeah. No, it's yeah, that's hot. That's hot right now. Is it still hot? I think they might have pivoted off but but regardless I'm an old man. So I say things like Karen Regardless, I'm an old man, so I say things like Karen, dude. Hot, hot, hot, hot! And, dude, it was pretty wild to meet one out in the streets, and I didn't back down. I held my ground, and it was awkward for everyone involved. Are you sure you weren't the Karen? Will you tell the story, Adam?

Yeah, I'll tell the story. I'll tell the story. Come on, let's go. Here we go. I'm living in a nightmare. So I'm at the Chick-fil-A. I've never been inside of a Chick-fil-A. I've never once been inside of one of these places.

There's a new one that opened up down the street from my house. So I'm swinging through. I'm getting a 30 pack of the naked chicken nuggies, baby. 30? God damn, boy. God damn! God damn!

30 pack of naked chicken nuggets. So it's just the grilled, the grilled nugs. So just a bucket of skinless, of loose chicken. And it's so good dude. I'm telling you. It's so good. I've never had it. I've never had it. I'm telling you dude. You know me, I love my chicken. It's ring and all baby. I'll gobble. Yeah. And so I'll stick to the sandwiches go ahead

Okay, but if you want to pivot off the sandwiches and go with a nice bucket of Bucket of loose ass wet chicken a new nugget. It's not wet. It's not wet though. They're not wet Oh, they're they're juicy. They're moist. They're not wet They gotta be wet. They gotta be wet. So sound wet dude. They're wet. They're juicy. They're moist. They're not wet. What? Fuck it, K. They gotta be wet. They gotta be wet. Go ahead. They sound wet, dude. They sound wet. They're not wet. They're juicy. Okay. Juicy.

Okay. So anyways, so I'm pulling in and there's up front, this is Orange County, right? And this is Southern California, really. So... It's Adam Devine, get out all the wet chicken. Dude, get it out the bucket. He's back. Get the wet chicken. So there's six or eight electric vehicle parking spots right up front. Right up front.

Yep. Thanks, Newsome. Thank you, Gavin. Yeah, totally. He beat me. Okie dokie. And then there's the lot and there's no cars parked in the electric vehicle. And then there's the lot behind it, and it's jammed

So then I don't drive back there. I'm looking for a spot I have to wait for someone to leave they leave I get a parking spot I'm walking up to the front this woman pulls in with a minivan. How do you know she's a woman? Gotcha bitch cuz I saw her face and her body and with shoes with her children I assumed I did assume that and this I don't know what do you want me to call her this troll? Oh, yeah the bitch what do you want me to call her this Karen's the Karen this beast this human chicken nugget gets out of her minivan and Out pops six kids T's like 12 12 year old boy, and they all get climb out. Yeah, and I'm not mad at this. I'm like these boys need to eat

I get that but the minivan was not electric Not an EV and I walked around it To make sure you're checking out her tailpipes. I'm checking for tailpipes, baby I walk around to make sure it isn't I get in line. You mind if I check your tailpipes ma'am? She then invites a friend that gets there after me and she has four kids to join her. What in the soccer mom? So they all go in front of me. I'm one person buying a bucket of juicy chicken nuggets. Arguably more food. Yeah, go ahead, go ahead. And we go to the front of the... we get to the front. It's kind of a long line. It's taken me forever. It's a new Chick-fil-A. Everyone's excited.

It's gotta be lying around the fucking block. Oh my god, it was fucking wild. I regretted it immediately. Yeah, there's celebrities there. Yeah, go ahead. So I'm pissed off a little bit. And I'm like, whatever I mean and then we get to the front the there's two cashiers working the other cashier sees me and she goes she whispers she goes yeah yeah yeah and the other woman is waiting for the other cash register I think I go is going yeah and she goes yeah and so I go through and I go I see where this is going. Yeah. And she goes, it's okay, you come, come. And so I go through and I go, I'll take 30 chicken nuggets. Get her in your bumper. No, she goes, excuse me, excuse me, we were first.

We were first. And I go, it's just me. And she goes, this just isn't fair. This isn't fair. And then her son goes, Mom, just let him go through. And she goes, this just isn't fair. This isn't fair. And then her son goes, mom, just let him go through. And she goes, no, no, it's just not fair. And she doubles down on how not fair it is. And I go, I love your EV. And she goes, excuse me? And I go, I love your electric vehicle.

And she's like, what are you talking about? I'm like, your minivan is not an electric vehicle. And she's like, what are you talking about? I'm like, your minivan is not an electric vehicle. And she's like, she doesn't say anything to that. She steps to the counter and starts ordering. I'm not going to wrestle this woman to the ground. So I step back and I let them order. And they order and they order and them order and they order and they order and they order and they order and they order and they order and they order and then the one next to me opens up and then I order my third nugget. I'm done ordering and they're still ordering.

I pay for the food. I go over there and then I see and then she comes and she goes it's just I'm sorry but it just isn't fair. You can't just skip ahead. Right. Wow. She doubles like down again and I go. Gonna let it die. Yes and I go. You didn't drive an electric vehicle and you parked in the electric vehicle spot. Right. She goes I beat you here and I go you didn't. I was here before you were. And I like am sort of teeing off on her. And then her friend whispers, that's bumper for big perfect. And I'm assuming that's what she whispered because you see it wash

over her face. I can only assume you're singing this whole thing. And then they all start whispering to each other and then they go back and get chairs and then they're like whispering and taking photos of me dude. So I went online to look to see if there's any photos of like the back of me. From the lobster roll on the teenager to the Karen, you're like racking it up. Public enemy number one. Yeah dude. Bumper's a bad boy. I know dude. Well she started it. But by the way, she was out of pocket, correct? Correct? Um, yeah.

I would say, you know what you should have done Adam, if you want to know the proper protocol, is when the cashier said, hey, come on over here. You should have- Hang on a second. Boy. The proper protocol. You coming out here like you're the king of life. Go ahead, bro.

Tell me the proper protocol. When the cashier called you over, because you're just one, you should have asked the girl, you should have been like, is it cool if I go in front of you? I'm just one person. She's telling me to go over there.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. And then she probably would have been like, actually, no, I was here first. And then he could be like, is it cool if I go in front of you? I'm just one person. She's telling me to go over there. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. And then she probably would have been like, actually, no, I was here first. And then he could be like, wow, this, this, then you could have told the cashier, this girl's, she's being a bitch or whatever, instead of. Oh, that's a proper protocol, to whisper this woman's a bitch.

Yeah. She's being a bitch. She's being a tall bitch. No, no, no, and yeah, I think on most occasions, I would have done that. But she, first of all, she's seven people herself. And then she invited four more people to join her crew. So that's 11 people that she's ordering food for. She sucks. And then the cashier saw what was happening and waved me through.

I was like, good, okay, sneaky. Thank you. And you know, it was just, give me a 30 piece of the neck. It was wild. Even her son was like, my mom sucks. She was like, cause the son was like, just let him go ahead, mom. And she's like, no, no, it's not fair. And then, and, oh oh and I didn't I

left this part of the story out so I'm waiting for the other cashier to open up and and Chloe calls me right then and I'm asking her if she wants anything because I'm like here and and and and and and then I'm like yes I'm like this woman shows up with What about your EV? She shows up with this people. And are you performing this kind of, are you kind of like performing the phone call so that she can hear it? A little bit.

Yeah, yeah. And she's giving me a little side eye and I'm like she doesn't drive an EV. I walked around her minivan. It's not an EV. It isn't an EV. She parked in the EV spot. If she would have parked in the parking lot, I would have been in front of her. But she didn't, she broke the rule.

Damn. I'm sorry. Yeah, so I was like, that happened last week and it stuck with you. I'm still a little heated about it. These things happen, these things happen. We live in such a neutral society where we don't have to kind of deal with conflict

that when it does happen now. You're ready. Ready for war. Yep. You think about it a week later and it was just a fucking bunch of wet nuggets is all it was. Um, so here's the thing. See, the way you moved off, the way you moved off and said that, um, you were like expecting us to erupt in laughter. You know how like when you would like you're in a party situation or something and then you drop a joke and the whole crowd laughs like the whole circle laughs of the little circle you're in

That's never happened to me. And then you just walk away. That's what Ders just tried to do on the podcast. I wish that's ever happened to me in real life. Yeah, wait you're at parties you say a joke everybody bursts laughing and then you just walk away. This is a scenario I do not know Anyways, I gotta get a beer anybody want to be yeah. Yeah, that's exactly right. Then you got a dip Then you got a dip. You know Blake don't like you don't know. Well, yeah No, I I thought you did as I ran through the scenario. Yeah, it's like I gotta get a beer you you offer that way

Yeah, and just so you know Adam in this scenario when you walk away everyone, that wasn't that funny, right? Yeah, I'm so glad he walked away. So annoying. Rude, dude. Come on, bro. Don't say that to me. I'm on a fragile state. Burn! I'm gonna jump on what Blake was saying.

The way to live life. Okay. No, but I... So you took advantage of a situation going around. That is true, right? But I was waved around I didn't just go around I was waved around but you were waved around So I would have leaned into that I would have just gone she waved me around she waved me around I don't have to tell you she waved me around. Yeah, but now you're offering that person up for sacrifice

Like that's wrong, dude. You got a vouch for them. no because that's what happened that's what happened what happened that is what happened but that's what happened it is but now you're snitching on her now the man now now it starts to go now the manager comes out goes like what's going on out here it's like I let him and maybe you would have done that Ders but I know you you would have you was in it's way harder than I'd leaned in About the EV and about everything and about the other friends cutting it would have been a thousand percent The thing I would have kept repeating, you know when you get an argument and you just keep repeating the same thing So then what rules apply what rules apply then? Well, so then what rules apply I can't go ahead of you here after she just offered me to go ahead

But you get to park and the EV thing without an EV. So what rules apply? I can't go ahead of you here after she just offered me to go ahead, but you get to park in the EV thing without an EV? So what rules apply? You tell me. What rules apply? This is the most, this is a straight up white off at that point. Everybody around you not white is just like eating

and watching. Yeah, they're like, damn son. They're talking like it's a safari, like, and now the male species is going after. What rules apply at this point excuse me excuse me excuse me I'm with you I'm with you if she's breaking that rule what rules apply what rules apply then ma'am you tell me I mean yeah and see that's why you're better at arguing because you would have done the classic

repeat which does work it's a hood. It's a hood special. Repeating is a hood special. Yeah! See, and I didn't want to say that, but once you started to repeat it, I was like, that's because you grew up around a lot of black people. But what did I say though? Yes, it's a but what did I say though.

Yes, it's a but what did I say though. That's all you have to say over and over again. You grew up around a lot of black people. You have this skillset that I don't have. Of repeating. And by the way, sometimes you get to a point where you're like, but what did I say though? Yeah, you forgot.

You have to. And now you're asking. The tone changes. It goes from, what did I say though? What did I say though? What did I say though? What did I say though? But what did I say though? What did I say though? What did I say though?

What was I asking for again? Yeah. Like sir your nuggets have dried out. These are dry. You're wet. Good I don't like them. They're not wet. We're gonna have to re-dip your nuggets. We're gonna have to marinate these boys one more time in the wetness. Wet, wet, juicy nugs. Well, I'm sorry you encountered that Karen, dude. That sucks. I don't know if I've ever... It's been... No, it's not ever, but it's been a long time since I've... Karen? Well, first of all, I'm not in fast food restaurants.

Yeah. Maybe ever. And this is why? Well, yeah, it's drive-through, you know. It's drive-through, and I kind of rarely go to fast food anyway, so this was a special treat. It's a new Chick-fil-A. I was getting the healthy option. Sure.

Yeah, I was. I was. I just wanna party. Sure. It's chicken. It's the health chicken. Yes, yes. It's chicken.

So they say. 500 calories. 500 calories. I looked it up. So they say. 500 calories. 500 calories. I looked it up. Okay, that's not bad. Just like great shoes, great books take you places. Through unforgettable love stories and into conversations with characters you'll never forget.

I think any good romance, it gives me this feeling of like butterflies. I'm Danielle Robay and this is Bookmarked by Reese's Book Club, the new podcast from Hello Sunshine and iHeart Podcasts. Every week I sit down with your favorite book lovers, authors, celebrities, book talkers, and more to explore the stories that shape us, on the page and off. I've been reading every Reese's Book Club pick, deep diving book talk theories, and obsessing over book to screen casts for years. And now I get to talk to the people making the magic.

So if you've ever fallen in love with a fictional character, or cried at the last chapter, or passed a book to a friend saying, you have to read this, this podcast is for you. Listen to Bookmarked by Reese's Book Club on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Over the past six years of making my true crime podcast Hell and Gone, I've learned one thing. No town is too small for murder. I'm Katherine Townsend.

I've received hundreds of messages from people across the country begging for help with unsolved murders. I was received hundreds of messages from people across the country, begging for help with unsolved murders. I was calling about the murder of my husband at the cold case. I've never found her and it haunts me to this day. The murderer is still out there. Every week on Hell and Gone Murder Line, I dig into a new case, bringing the skills I've learned as a journalist and private investigator to ask the questions no one else is asking.

Police really didn't care to even try. She was still somebody's mother. journalist and private investigator to ask the questions no one else is asking. If you have a case you'd like me to look into, call the Hell and Gone Murder Line at 678-744-6145. Listen to Hell and Gone Murderline on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The American West with Dan Flores is the latest show from the MeatEater Podcast Network, hosted by me, writer and historian Dan Flores, and brought to you by Velvet Buck.

This podcast looks at a West available nowhere else. Each episode, I'll be diving into some of the lesser known histories of the West. I'll then be joined in conversation by guests such as Western historian Dr. Randall Williams and bestselling author and meat eater founder, Stephen Rinella. I'll correct my kids now and then where they'll say when cave people were here and I'll say it seems like the Ice Age people that were here didn't have a real affinity for caves. Stephen Ronella So join me starting Tuesday, May 6th, where

we'll delve into stories of the West and come to understand how it helps inform the ways in which we experience the region today. Listen to The American West with Dan Flores on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I know a lot of cops, and they get asked all the time, have you ever had to shoot your gun? Sometimes the answer is yes. But there's a company dedicated to a future where the answer will always be no. Across the country, cops call this Taser the revolution. But not everyone was convinced it was that simple. Cops believed everything that Taser told them.

From Lava for Good and the team that brought you Bone Valley comes a story about what happened when a multi-billion dollar company dedicated itself to one visionary mission. This is Absolute Season One, Taser Incorporated. I get right back there and it's bad. It's really, really, really bad. Listen to new episodes of Absolute Season One, Taser, Inc. on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Binge episodes one, two, and three on May 21st, and episodes four, five, and six on June 4th.

Ad free at Lava for Good Plus on Apple Podcasts. You guys tell me if I'm a Karen, because I had one today. You are. Tell me if I am a Karen in this situation. You are. What's a male Karen? A Kyle. A Kyle.

A Kyle. So I go to pick up my kid at summer camp and there's like a long line you got to wait in because like they load all the kids in and then you can drive off. You got to have like a thing in your window that says your kid's name so they know who you are. Wow. Sure. Yeah, security's gone kind of high. This is cool. I like this. We don't want predators.

We don't want predators. You know honors? Predators. Uh, so, okay, well, should I give it to him? That's fine. Yes, points! I pull up, I pick up my three-year-old, okay? I had just switched the seats so that

like the the the kid seat is on the side that they want it to be which is already wrong because you want that to be on the curb side not a driver's side so you're not tucking a kid in on the street anyway I switched it for them so then they put my three-year-old in the car and they go, okay, see you later And I look back and he's not buckled into its seat. Oh shit, and I go Hey, like can did he's not buckled and they go Yeah, you can just pull up right over there and buckle them and I was like so your policy is that you want me to drive With my kid not buckled in a car that you just put him in? Hold up.

Yeah, I go, that's not a big deal, but that seems like a bad idea for you, because if I pull up and someone behind me already got their kid and they pull away and for some horrible reason, we hit and my kid's not buckled because you didn't want to buckle him. Just launch it. That's a bad policy, right?

And she was like, yeah. If you're like in a rush and you wouldn't have looked to check. She's like, yeah, I'm just 15 years old. No, no, no, she's, this woman was older than me probably. Oh, okay. And she's like, she's old as dirt. Exactly.

God damn. God damn. Well, leave her alone, that's elder abuse. God damn. And so I go, I'm gonna hop out and I'm gonna buckle him myself and not drive with him unbuckled because I don't know if that's what we want here. That's kind of wild.

Like she doesn't say like, just so you know, he's not buckled. You looked and observed that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Thank you, Blake. I could have just driven off. Right, right, right. That is ridiculous.

I feel like maybe she skipped a step or something. Why isn't she buckling? I would say no, that's not, that is not Kyle behavior. And I was super delicate about it too, where I was like, you don't want this, right? Like, if, God forbid, something very bad happens that's probably not gonna happen, you just put my kid in a car unbuckled

and told me to drive off with him unbuckled. Yeah Yeah that's crazy. I'm gonna own this camp by the end of the second. Do you think that she just fucked up? Did she just not buckle him and then she was like backpedaling like oh we don't do that there? No she goes you can just do it right over there it just is faster for everyone to get through. That's ridiculous. But then everyone's pulling up over there. Over there. Yeah. And no one's. And you're not going anywhere anyway. So then I have to get out and buckle him and then get back in, which is slower than,

and everybody else has to do the same thing, which is slower than you just putting him in, buckling him and then saying, so long. Right. You know, as a group of fucking aging, fucking dads, I'll tell you something right now, there's nothing fucking worse than a child pick up

and drop off line in any instance. They are bad. This one is wild. I've yet to experience this. It doesn't seem fun, dude. Dude, it's bad. Dude, when you fire your staff and you start doing it at them, it's gonna be wild.

Dude, you're gonna hate it, brother. He's too young to be dropped off anywhere. When you meet your kid, it's gonna be crazy, bro. It's crazy, dude. The elementary school down my house, down the street from my house, seems so chaotic. Every day that I drive past it, when it's a pick up or drop off time,

it's just fucking wild. I'm like, I think- It's a war zone. I think I'm gonna home school. Our school is all right. The pickup drop-off is pretty organized, but this summer camp situation I was like why like it so there's a circle to pick up so that they made me switch the seats on the others I'm like, why isn't the circle the other way? I got a run summer back in my day. We rollerbladed to school Thank you. Nobody picked our ass up.

Thank you. God damn. Yeah, you guys walked, did you guys walk to elementary school? I did. I walked, I rode the bus. Literally next door to my house, so yeah. I used to ride the bus.

It was fucking fun, dude. We used to take the last bus. Every day. And why was that fun? Cause you gotta wake up super early and go stand on the street corner? No, no, sorry, I'm saying after school. After school, like me, Kyle, Adam, Teddy,

we would just stay after school as late as we could and take the very last bus home. It was fucking sick. I think I told you guys about this in the Workaholics' writers' room, but- Practice kissing. In elementary school, my buddy- Back in the day. My buddy who, but in elementary school, my buddy, my buddy who

lived kind of far from school was like, dude, you gotta ride the bus with me. The bus driver's crazy. And I was like, okay, hey mom, can I go over to Alex's house? Sure. So I ride the bus. The bus driver was insane. He would like gun it and then slam on the brakes and have all the kids like, boom. Like, cause it's fun Like he was listening to Metallica or cuz he's trying to hurt people. No, he was like, it's like a ride and And who was the the the driver in Simpsons was it Otto? Yeah He was basically that guy and so you would get on top of like the seats

Well, yeah, this dude rocks. You're like seat surfing. So he would gun it and you'd go back a little bit and then he'd slam on the brakes and you'd fall into your little seat in front of you. This dude rocks. I'll never forget this because it was like the craziest thing I've ever done at this age.

I'll never forget this because he killed Jeff. And so there's like a construction site with a bunch of cones and he goes, who wants me to hit the cones? And we're all like, yeah. And he just goes, bump, bump, bump, bump, bump, bump, bump. And he ran down all the cones. And then I hit up my boy, Alex, like the next day or next week or whatever. And like, yo, can I ride the, the, the bus again? And he's like, he got fired. He's gone. He hasn't been there. Oh man. I was like, he's like, yo got fired. He's gone. He hasn't been there.

Oh man, I was like, he's like, yo, hey, you see that chick up there? He's like honky. He's like, dump him out. Right. Dump him out. Release the twins. Hey, educate these kids. I imagine every kid went home and like gleefully told their parents like what happened.

How fun, how funny is he? And the parents are like, oh, huh, let me just call everyone including the police. This guy's done. Unreal. I wonder how long of a run he had. Well that sucks, that sucks for him. Yeah, that sounds like he was a fucking outstanding brage. He changed me.

Now, he was drunk, right? I feel like, ya ver. I think he's just one of those guys who is not a serious person, who kind of has a serious job, right? That's a very serious job. And it's like what's the worst that could happen if you're flooring it and then slamming on the brakes I'm drunk now and you're like someone could get really hurt. He's like, oh, I guess maybe I never thought of that all the kids were having a good time

Well, I mean I bet not all of the Like, I know I would have had a great time experiencing that. You motherfucker smoke weed. But I know that my wife would have been petrified as a little girl. Like, there for sure are some little kids on that bus that were not down. Aren't down for that. Like, Blake would have been so scared, dude. You could just tell. No way, dude. I would have been hyped, bro. What are you talking about? dude I would have been hyped bro what are you talking about?

He'd be like this is not how you live life. No this is not regulation brother. Blake would have been so scared. I wouldn't dude. Dude unreal and this was by the way like fucking 38 years ago or some shit and I still remember who wants me to hit the cones yeah it sounds like you had the ride of a lifetime. He probably worked at like the carnival and then like would drive the bus during the week. Yeah, and thanks for bringing that up. I never talk about the carnival in my hometown.

Did you guys have carnivals? Yeah, we had carnivals. You remember the carnies? I live in like the city. Yeah, Duras lived in the city. You never went to a carnival? I remember going to a state fair and getting on the zipper, right? That's not the city. Yeah dude. You never went to a carnival? I remember going to a state fair and getting on the zipper right? That's not the same. That's a little more organized. Oh yeah we

had Miller days so I grew up in Miller Nebraska which is a suburb of Omaha of course and we had Miller days dude and you would you know ask for some little extra coin and then ask a girl to go on the zipper with you. The zipper was fucking rough. Get in that cage, do some flips. When's the last time you rode a zipper? That will fuck your old ass up, dude. I think it would've ruined it. Oh, it's bad.

Well, I think, like now, I remember my dad, he used to always go on roller coasters with me as a kid, but he also had me when he was 26 years old so by the time he was my age I Was done doing roller coasters right? Yeah, so like He was already getting vertigo when I was like eight Nine ten years old and I remember being like oh my god. this guy's ancient. I haven't been on like a true spinny ride in forever. I'm like... I think that's what they're called. Yeah. Or something that goes upside down. Or like a Gravitron. Since Workaholics. Was that the last time we did it? Was when we did it on

Workaholics? Yes. Which by the way, I loved that we put a Gravitron in the front yard of our house. This is what we do guys. It was brilliant. And the fact that, you know, we're talking about doing, I mean, can we even talk about doing a show together again? Yeah, sure, we can talk about it. You want to shut up about it. Yeah. You wanna shut up about it. We're talking about doing another show together. And basically it would be too expensive to shoot in this shitty house that we shot workaholics in. So we would have to shoot that same show in Vancouver or Montreal or Toronto or where

the fuck ever. Oh Edmonton. Thank you Newsome. Thanks Newsome. By the way, I do like how he was like, and I'm going to put in an injection of cash into the entertainment industry. And it's like, bro, no one cared.

No. That's how I roll. No studio, no streamer was like, oh cool, great. Let's do it here then. They were all like, close but no cigar, we're sending people to the Philippines. That'd be kinda sick. Manila, pull up.

Okay. Tell me you hate your family without telling me you hate your family. No way, bro, you know we got people. I had a meeting at a, like a general meeting at a studio the other day, and this executive told me she was like they We actually shoot a lot of our shows in Ireland

Oh, yeah, love people love going to Ireland and and it's beautiful over there And I'm like, I mean I would disagree with her. I was like, oh, of course. Yeah, it sounds great And admittedly I would like to go to Ireland. That'd be awesome. I don't want to shoot a whole show in Ireland No, I would have accidentally said bitch you go to Ireland, I would like to go to Ireland. That'd be awesome. I don't want to shoot a whole show in Ireland. No, I would have accidentally said, bitch, you go to Ireland. What? I'm like... Puff pee!

Yeah, I'm like, I'm not trying to spend six months out of my year living in Ireland away from my family and friends and everything I know and love. I'm like, there's a reason I live in LA so I could shoot the shows in LA. By the way... Hollywood! I'm so pissed now. I was going through my finances and found something... We all share the same money manager, right?

So you guys know where I'm going with this. But going through the finances after... Money! While I was in Australia and I'm like, what is this little this little hell of money? Geez, here. What is this? I don't recognize this. And he was like, oh, I have to pay somebody there because you end up paying taxes here and where you're shooting. What the hell?

And so there's obviously like loopholes where they're like, so we pay X amount to this company so that you then are paying less in Australia and aren't getting gouged. And I'm like, so the production saves money, but I'm paying taxes in two places. Double. Yeah. Tight butthole. Yeah. And what sucks, thanks, like, like you have a business manager who is smart enough to know what loopholes to jump through and he knows what to do. For sure. Yeah, how to slide stuff a little over here.

But there's actors who are at the level that they don't need a money manager, right? Correct. And this might be one of their first jobs and they're going over there. They don't know to do this and they're just getting gouged, man. Yeah. We should be in charge. We should. We should be.

We can start a firm. We should start a firm. Adam will be like, let me go around these cars, see which ones are EVs. Like, you do that. Yeah, I'm always checking tailpipes. I'll make sure people are buckled. Blake?

I'm a dumbass. Thank you, yeah, okay. Yeah, that is right, correct. I'll just, you know just check in, kiss babies. Have you guys had any run-ins with Karens? Blake, do you have any? I'm trying to think the last, no, you know, I'm not much of a person who gets into

any sort of skirmish or anything. You don't stand up for yourself? No, I let Karens see me coming, man. Right. No, I think generally... Love me gobble. I'm a good diffuser. I'm a good, yeah, diffuse the situation.

Is that what you do to your hair? No. Do you ever use one of those blow dryer things that have like the little fingers? That have like the cone? No, only on set. I need one of those. I never use blow dryers.

I just... We can tell. Okay. So you've never run into a Karen, you've never been... I need one of those. I never use blow dryers. I just... We could tell. Okay. So you've never run into a Karen. You've never been... So, yeah. So essentially Blake just backs down. I think, yeah. There's no threatening presence. He doesn't... If someone's stepping all over him, he allows it to happen. I'm trying to think of the last time I really, like, engaged in a moment with a person that was like, it was getting testy

and it has been a while. Yeah. Here's my question. I think we covered this a long time ago about getting punched in the face on a whatever. You know these kids who like they do, they go in like groups of 30 popping wheelies in the streets and then they go as close

to your car as possible and then turn and miss you and it's like, whatever, great. But sometimes they hit your car. Blake. They do? Yeah, of course they do. Hold up. What happens if they hit your car, Blazer, and like fuck your tail light up or some shit?

Like break my tail light? Yeah, your headlight, right in your headlight, boom. Yeah, they dent the hood, baby. That's gonna be mucho dinero. What are we doing? My Jeep is, oh, I need a new Jeep, so I'm like not too upset about it. I don't value my car that much right now.

Wow. This kid, let me just paint the picture. He hits the tail light. Tail light's broken, right? Gone. He's off. She gone. He falls off his bike.

What? My bitch. His falls off his bike. What? His pants actually fall down. Allegedly! He's got a rock hard cock. Are you blowing this too or no? I don't know. Oh Blake. No dude, what?

Oh okay. Wait, I'm just wondering, I don't know, I don't know. Wait, does he, he lands on his back? Like spread eagle? He's okay. Is he of age? His pants get, Is he of age? He's get, Is he of age?

He's 18 in a day. He's 18 in a day, baby. Now the scenario's getting juicier than a fucking Chick-fil-A unbreaded nugget, baby. Naked, naked. The headlight's broken. His pants somehow got pulled by his bike seat down. He's rock hard. Do you let it slide?

Do you blow him or do you? Acost him what are we doing here? Is he okay? I asked him he's all right. He's gonna be fine. He's gonna. Yeah, it's fine It's a little road rash. Well, I'm like little road. Yeah, he's 18 a day. He's flexible Well, then in that case if I'm already like I've pulled over my Jeep. I've like stopped to check if he's okay I yeah, I think I mentioned like dude you broke my my my tail light or my headlight and he goes fuck off Like and by the way as this all happens, and I'm sucking your dick motherfucker as this happens 19 other little teenage dudes on their bikes are rolling up to fuck their dicks aren't out yet That's where I feel like if a guy does that and hits my car and the taillights busted or the

Cars fucked up and then he falls off his bike and then he's picking his bike back up I would then get out and try to fight them man, right? Right. I feel like you get the bike, right? Yeah, well, I mean if he's picked, you know what I mean. I'm like, yes But it's the 19 other homies. That's when you go, well dude, I'm not trying to get murdered for this, but if it's one guy and he was being an asshole... It's never one guy. It's never one guy. Because who's riding their bike wheeling around by themselves dodging cars? Nobody.

A legend. Yeah, a true legend probably. Yeah, that true legend probably. Yeah, that's probably true. Some guy named Courtney. Logan. Oh, here we go, hell yeah. Yeah, so like, okay, different scenario,

different scenario, a different scenario. It's gridlock traffic. Okay, a guy pulls up and you're just zoning out, you're listening to your music. This is streets, like not freeways, streets, yeah? Streets. And there's like a concert at the Bowl. Yes.

You're right there. You're right there. And it's just great. Like I drove, it took me two and a half hours to drive from Santa Monica to my house in Orange County yesterday. And it took me down Lincoln. This is not a Hollywood conversation. For one hour.

Yeah. But so I'm driving down. I was stuck in traffic and I was like, I wonder if Blake could even handle this situation What? Situation dude, what is your problem? Why would you do that? I bet Blake couldn't fucking handle this traffic turn the beat up I love I love sitting in traffic. What are you talking about? What are you talking about? Take it easy on your boy. This is your guy No, no, no, I I did not even think I didn't was even thinking of like good good So so uh so anyway, so you're in traffic and a guy just pulls up, and he's just like what's up, bitch?

And you're like what he's like fuck you and then he calls you the f-word dude He dropped that to you, okay, and okay you're like okay and then you're stuck in traffic for the next and he's just right alongside of me yeah and he's just eyeing you and he's just like what the fuck are you gonna do about it I mean at that I mean at this point I'm like wait what like how do I know you what what are you even fucking doing what's what's the deal here like why are you so upset towards me and do you say anything to him yes or yeah this is what I'm saying like well I'm so

sorry I'm not going to fuck you sir what's going on like what it what's the problem here well hey Anders that's it that's a clever that's that's a clever thing to say and I'm I want to hear what I has I wouldn't say I go I go I'm sorry. I'm on a call. I can't I just can't can't fuck you right now There's a world where this could happen sir if this guy is just like Next to my window the whole time just kind of like whole time saying this to me I'm like what like what's going on? Maybe you think I'm someone else like what what did I do to you? Oh, that's a good one. Hey, maybe you think I'm someone else? Like, what did I do to you? Oh, that's a good one. Hey, maybe you think I'm someone else.

Whoa, but he's not saying it like that. Yeah, it's a tone. It's a tone. On the tone on that? I'm not trying to start a fight with this guy. I'm going, why are you? No, he's starting it. That's what Adam is saying. I'm saying, why are you trying to fight me? And what if this guy goes, we're not going anywhere, get out your car. Get out your car, we're not going anywhere. That seems silly. It's gridlocked, you're not going anywhere.

That seems silly. And he goes, I don't have a gun or a knife. This happened to Adam. Well does that help? Okay. Does that help? Okay, yeah, that helps a little bit. Is he driving an EV, did you check the pipes? Does he throw me boxing gloves?

Is he like, I just wanna like have a boxing match? Ready, I'm gonna add a little, I just wanna like have a boxing match? Ready? I'm gonna add a little, I wouldn't say realistic, but maybe less cartoonish. He just starts throwing pennies at your window. Oh shit. Tink, tink. That'd be annoying.

And he's got change. He's got a lot of pennies, dog. He's got, bro, this dude has change. I mean, yes, at this point I have to engage him in some way, I have to roll down my window and be like. You roll the window down, now the pennies are coming into your car. I don't know, I don't know, I don't know.

Now you got hella pennies in your car. I guess, well, then you're making some money off this guy. Yeah, that's actually kinda sick, yeah. Yeah, well, holy shit. I don't know, I don't know what this guy wants. That's actually kinda sick, yeah. Yeah, well, holy shit. I don't know, I don't know what this guy wants. This guy seems really unhinged. I mean, I would have to assess,

I'd have to really look at him, see his eyes, see how much of a maniac he is. I would have to assess it. Adam, I like this. I like this scenario, but there's not enough bite to it where like I'm trying to get in from like a lane that's closing or whatever and he's not enough bite to it where like, I'm trying to get in from like a lane that's closing or whatever and he's not letting me, like I need like an incident before the shit talk.

If a person just rolls down the window and just goes, hey, F word, I go, all right, well, I don't know what's going on here. Right, like say I cut him off something bad and then he's like, he takes it super personal and now he's following me around the city like, yo, you fucking cut me off back there. And I know he wants to beat my ass.

I mean, I don't know. This is a cool horror movie where you cut someone off. Wait, what's the one? This is beef. Isn't this beef? This is just beef. Yeah, that's exactly what it is. The show beef. That is.

Yeah, I was thinking of that movie with Russell Crowe. Somebody help me! Paul Walker? No, with Russell Crowe. Somebody help me! Paul Walker? Paul Walker? No, with Russell Crowe. Russell Crowe? Gladiator? No, there's a new movie, I mean it's a few years old now. Phone booth. Beautiful Minds.

No, no, no. Neither of those. It's Russell Crowe and this woman cuts him off and he loses his mind and stalks this woman. White Beef. Adam, you watch these white beef thumbnail movies, I'm just not clicking. I'm always watching. It's called Unhinged. Unhinged.

That sounds like my guy. You guys should watch it. Unhinged, is it good? It's so good. Is it? Is it like a new Falling Down, the Michael Douglas movie? Falling Down is one of the greatest movies of all time. It's good.

It is good. It was a little bit of a sleeper. I don't think it got a huge release. But I watched it. I bet it's the realest performance Russell Crowe has ever given. If he's just being hella pissed off. Like when you say these things, I'm like, what?

I think inside, isn't he just like a super angry dude? I think he wants to... You can watch L.A. Confidential Confidentials the same thing with maybe a little more I need to run it back. Maybe on the cruise we have like a little game where like someone can come up and say whatever they want to us and then we have to say a Whatever like put down or come back or whatever epic slam that we can give back and just see I'm not that good at it.

I feel like something like a David Spade who for sure was bullied his entire childhood is like a master. Oh, dude, still, still is bullied. He's still a bully, dude. Yeah, that's probably true. Probably a little bit. Yeah. I mean, for sure, if he's rolling in the Kevin James Sandler You know grown-ups and that crew and with Chris Rock, you know, they're they're piling up spade

Yeah, well Chris Rock's Chris Rock same thing bullied his whole life little dude Well, he's suit he was like and bullied by his own family like like Charlie or uh Charlie not Charlie Murphy. I'm thinking of who's Chris Rock's brother? Yeah, Tony Rock. Tony, yeah. Well, I guess he's a little guy too though, huh? No, Tony's a big guy. Okay, good.

He's not, he's not. Remember how skinny Chris Rock used to look? Yeah, he only played crack heads. He's filled in a little bit. He looked like, and I hate to say it, okay, you don't have to. Yeah, you don't have to say it. Wow, dude! Like Blake, like Blake. Yeah, you don't have to say it. Wow, dude!

Like Blake. Like Blake. Oh, sure. Yeah, like a afrofetus, is that what we're saying? You're saying, look like me when I was in high school. Look like when you were a young kid. I'm definitely painfully skinny. And he's Jack now, though.

I'm sizable. He's Jack now. I can get people on my shoulders. Whoa. Okay. How do you know? Uh, I just had Isaac on my shoulders the other day. Just lifting him up.

Yeah. And he's a big man. He's huge. Yeah, I was there. He's humongous. Damn. Just like great shoes, great books take you places. Through unforgettable love stories

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This is Absolute Season One, Taser Incorporated. I get right back there and it's bad. It's really, really, really bad. Listen to new episodes of Absolute Season 1, Taser, Inc. on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Binge episodes 1, 2, and 3 on May 21st, and episodes 4, 5, and 6 on June 4th. Ad free at Lava for Good Plus on Apple Podcasts. Yeah, we partied. You were missed. Durs had other obligations, but it was Isaac's, I believe, 75th birthday.

Yeah. And... I just want to party. It was Isaac's, I believe, 75th birthday. Yeah. And... I just wanna party! It was his 55th birthday and we had a banger, his wife threw a banger for him. Yeah. Punk rock, getting radical. And my god did we get drunk.

I was hungover for two days. I'm not used to drinking that much anymore and it affected me. And where was the party again? I can't remember. It was at the American Legion, which was hilarious. Which is where he did his... No, that was at the Elks Club. It's a different thing. It's similar vibes.

Got it. My baby. This place was funny. This place was fun. We walk in and this guy in a suit, this old man, probably 75 years old, was like... At least. He's like, uh, excuse me, can I help you? And he was like, can I help you? And I was like, I'm here for the party. And he's like, you didn't hear the announcement?

And I'm like, no. And he's like, it's in the back. You shouldn't even be walking through here. And I'm like, I don't know what to tell ya. You said, okay, boomer. Monk Rock, getting radical. And he goes, follow me. And we walked through, it was White Hair City, dude.

Oh my god. It was hilarious rolling up. And by the way, I loved it. And I'm like, how do I get involved? This seems like the type of party that all the grandmas and grandpas. Just scissoring. You know that they would just fall in love. Fall in love with us.

Yeah, it was straight up old school Reagan Republicans in the house, baby. And Blake loves that vibe. And then we go out back and then it's a true banger, Flashback Heart Attack, which was the band. They're going to be on the cruise. They're going to be on the cruise. They're cool, man. They're down.

They were great. They were down. I'm a fan. Yeah, that's going to be a fun time having them on the cruise. They're cool man. They're down. They were down. I'm a fan yeah, that's gonna be a fun time having them on the boat and And we we party we drank our faces off is a great time. It was it was really really crazy I took everyone by boat to one of my favorite bars class of 47 Oh, yeah, what's the what people you can have on your boat? Is this your, what is it called, the Duffy? Duffy, yeah. What's the max you can have on the Duffy? I think it's like 12, but I think I fit 22.

That's where I was going. I go, I want to hear the max and I want to hear your record. It was a slow ride. It was a slow ride. Yeah, we were chugged. The water was this close to spilling over. It was a slow ride. Yeah. Yeah, we were we were chug the water was this this close to Spilling over it was rad. It was it was very fun. I don't remember much of the bar either I know that I definitely skinned my knee

I think I think I tripped on the entrance of class 47. Oh, that's cool Of course. Yeah, that's that's a good way to get yourself kicked out right away. They were hyped. Tripping, falling in, yeah. They were hyped. Well, that place they would be. Yeah, they're falling. They're hyped.

Well, to my, what am I trying to say? Shagrin? No, to my argument, to my, what am I, I don't know. To my credit, before I went to Isaac's, I went to Hooters Coast to Mesa and tore it up. I was pretty responsible. It's just that it's closing at the end of this month.

They all are. So I really had to give it a send off. Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba. Shout out to Janessa, Sissy. Thanks for treating me right, man. It's really, really kind of you guys. Don't make it weird. It's not, dude. Oh my god! Yeah, just for treating me right, man. It's really, really kind of you guys. Don't make it weird.

It's not, dude. Oh my God! Yeah, just the way you called them out. The fact that you went was fine, and now that you're like- Yeah, you're saying their names. You're paying scholarships for their college or some shit. Like, I don't understand what's happening.

Okay, let's go. Yeah, what does your girl feel about you remembering their names enough to call them out on the podcast? They were very kind. Because I told them that the one in Burbank had closed and before they closed, I really, really, really loved the orange cups at Hooters. I was telling them my sob story and they gave me the orange cups.

So I am now a proud owner. Okay, well that was a question that I had because you posted, which by the way, you never post about the cruise or this is important or anything that we're like trying to sell tickets for when we were on tour. He wouldn't post about that, but he had, he posted about his 15 orange Hooters cups

that he had. You had fucking disaster my guy I'm like wow I didn't realize that that they stole a box of Hooters cups, but you you I didn't steal them to Tonesa and Janessa They were very kind they were very kind people there my I consider them dear friends. Did you get a box of 30 wets? What'd you get? What do you come with when you go to Hooters? Oh, no, I always do the same thing. I love... Do you go Naked Juicies or...? No, no, no, no. I go Breaded Daytona, baby.

Mm-hmm. But do you say all drummies or do you like...? No, because I'm... I've... In my old age, I have come to like the flats. I'm a flats man now. Oh man, take a look at my life. Do you do the, do you do the move where you just put it in and fully gone?

The one bite. I try. You try. But I'm not, I'm not pro yet. I go all drummies. I'm not fucking around with those little coochies. I used to like drummies, but the coochies are good, dude. Those little coochies, the little coochies. No!

The flats are delish. I just, the meat is nice on there. Maybe that's the next, instead of Hooters coochies, come up with little coochies. Don Cain! No drum. Hey, no drummies here, just little coochies. No drummies, just little coochies.

Well, any take backs? No, I'd stand by that. No, I stand by that. Any stand-bys. Any take-backs or stand-bys. Stand-bys. Stand-by it. Stand-by it. I will say it was great.

And I feel like all of these things that were these great inventions, little coochies, things like that, we got to bring that on the cruise, baby, because the cruise is coming up. You know, we're six months away or so, seven months? Six months, yeah. It'll be here. Do we get to name the menus and that kind of stuff?

We're like... I hope so. If there are wings, we call them little coochies, and is there a drink named after like, Karen's and that kind of stuff? I would absolutely love to get in the weeds with some of that stuff. I hope...

Yeah, we gotta run that up the poll. Cute and clever, the yes points menu. Yes. I hope the Norwegian queen will allow us to do some of that stuff. Wait, is that the name of the boat? Is this a Norwegian cruise line? Yes, punch! I believe so.

Isaac, isn't it Norwegian queen? I'm coming home. The name of the boat is Norwegian queen. I believe so. Isaac, isn't it Norwegian Queen? I'm coming home. The name of the boat is Norwegian Queen. I believe so. Yes. Oh my God. That was my brother's nickname in high school. Yeah, Ders.

Holy. I love that, Ders. That's the points. Yeah, I'm here. Yes, points. Of course. The Norwegian Queen. Yeah, I mean, The Norwegian Queen yeah, I mean I love it work

And if you I mean we still have some some what do they call them cabins available? So yeah are looking to yeah swoop it up. It's gonna be so much fucking fun, dude I really and by the way This is a phenomenon that I think you guys hip to me too, which is the thing I must start saying a lot Okay hip to be is that in cruise culture, you can get paired up with other people. Mm-hmm. It's a bagel.

Yeah, you can get little bunk mates. What are they talking about here? Yeah, so you can see- This is unreal. It seems like a cool way to meet a best friend for the rest of your life. I think so, especially like a cruise like this, so like you obviously are gonna have to be a fan

of the podcast and probably work on it. Or curious. And most definitely game over man. Yes, absolutely. I think you're gonna, and then someone, the other person is also gonna be a big fan. You guys are immediately gonna have stuff to talk about. And dude, we went across the country

to many, many, many different cities and states. We did. I wanna be on you. And everyone we met was the exact same. Yep. Yeah, yeah. Good people. Yeah.

From New York City down to Oklahoma City, everyone, or Tulsa, everyone was kind of the same. Good vibes. And so if you, if you bunk up with somebody from a far away land, guess what? You're going to be hitting it off. Yep. You just found a best friend. It's that easy.

Yeah, well, you know what's fun? You know what's fun about the people that were fans of Workaholics, and this is important, is they're just us. There's just different versions of us. I can see in a crowd if they're a Dyrs fan or a My fan or a Blake's fan or just a fan of all of us. You could really tell where they land on the trifecta. And I can close my eyes and smell the Kyle fan.

It's crazy. Yeah, it is pretty wild. You know what I mean? It is pretty crazy. We got a Kyle fan. It's crazy. Yeah, it is pretty wild. It is pretty crazy. Woo! We got a Kyle fan, huh? Water trash. Oh! A choo-lee, roo-lee. Yeah, Kyle fans are the type of people that just rub crystals on their armpits

and expect to not have B.O. Water trash. Love the guy. Eats babies. Love the guy. I can't wait for the cruise. Yeah, it's gonna be fun. I think it's gonna be next level.

I'm getting more and more excited by the month. Call me crazy. I'm kind of shocked by, like, the talent that we got. Yeah, dude. I like us. I think we're fun, cool guys. But I'm also kind of shocked that some of the people who are joining us are joining us. Yeah, it's gonna be really, really fun. Nick Swarton is one of my favorite comedians of all time. Hilarious.

When I first started to do stand-up at the Improv, and I had just moved there, and I wasn't even doing stand-up at that time, I just was literally working the door and was just watching. And Nick Swartzen would light that stage on fucking fire. He was so in his bag, dude. It was incredible to see. And then you go over to the Comedy Store and you see Bobby Lee and he also is bringing the heat.

It's crazy. Also saw him nude a lot, which I'm hoping he busts. I think he might have stopped that. I think he might have stopped that. I think he might have stopped that. Really? But we're gonna be in international waters. No! Anything happens.

Yeah, anything's possible. What was the, I'm trying to think of like the Nick Swardson CD that was the, it wasn't Seriously Who Farted, right? Cause that one's really good. I think that one was a little later. That's a little later, right? Cause that one's really good. I think that one was a little later. That's a little later, right? It's a good question though.

The one where he's like shirtless and he's wearing a party hat. Which one was that? Yeah, and he has the one about like his joke about his funeral and how you would wanna be like hung from like the rafters and shit. It's all very good. I mean. Which is a great bit.

Seeing him on Comedy Central back in the day, I remember being like, I think this dude's like my age. Because he also looked hella young when he was young. And seeing him just crush. Well, when he was young, he like popped off when he was like 19 years old on Comedy Central, which is unbelievably young. And then, I mean, he had that bit about his grandma

where he would go, Nicholas! Nicholas! Nicholas! Yeah. Yeah, the bass. He's just lifting milk and she's like, you're the strongest boy in the world. You're the strongest boy in the world, Nicholas.

Unreal. The name of the album is Party. That's his first comedy album. What a ledge. Classic. Classic album. What a ledge, dude. 2007. He's captain of the ship, album. What a ledge. Classic album. Classic album, dude. 2007. He's captain of the ship, baby.

The Norwegian queen. Get on there. Yeah, I got a Norwegian flag speedo. I think I got it on the tour. I'm gonna have to be just in that. Yeah, I think that stays on. Your bottom doesn't change your top may, but your bottom's gotta stay the same.

Yes, sir. Right away, sir. Aye aye captain Hello And mark, how do you say marks last name mark? Consuelo's no. Yeah We got mark and swelos. He's gonna Kelly and mark. They're gonna be doing today's show interviews. Yeah, they're doing carry Mark ribbale, right? Yeah, dude, dude that guy brings the heat so hard Yeah, oh man. I can't wait to kick it with him. Like he does like giant shows. Oh, yeah giant shows

We're so stoked. He's super talented. Yeah, super talented very hyped on that. He's ready to rock I messaged him and I was like, you know,. Let's do this. And he's, he's hyped. Yeah. Cool. Oh yeah. It's gonna be a blast. And then Eric Griffin. So, you know, we're all sides of the fence. Yes. Eric Griffin will be bringing around our derbs. It's gonna be awesome. I haven't seen Eric in a long time, but if we hit an iceberg, we can all jump on Eric for safety and sail him. Hello. We're not going down. This ship will float. Everyone grab a knuckle hair. Everyone grab a knuckle hair that's the size of ropes.

Yeah. Eric will hit me up when we talk shit on Eric on this podcast. What is going on? He will hit me up and be like, man, come on. Why you gotta do me like that? And I love it every time yeah, I I'm like it's cuz you and it's cuz you will hit me up and say stuff like that. That's why

If if we didn't think that you wouldn't hear this and we're just talking shit. It wouldn't be fun It would just be mean that's and we wouldn't do it But the fact that we know that you will hear it, get upset, and then reach out, it makes us wanna do it even more. The fact that we know your greasy ass is listening. Greasy. It warms our hearts. Yeah, it really does.

Can't wait. Can't wait to be stuck on a boat with his ass. Can't wait. And maybe Blake might even post about it. I might, I'm hoping. I told Isaac I definitely will if he allows TK on the ship. I need Thomas Kellogg on the ship. But he's really trying to not let TK on the ship.

I don't know why. Let him home. I was saying TK should be doing man on the street shit. I think that'd be amazing. I think he should just be a guest karaoke performer or something. I think he should dress as a dunking genie and just literally be on the court dunking a basketball all day. Adam, I don't know if he likes talking about that. I don't know if he likes talking about that anymore. Dude.

I think that's all he likes talking about. We should, we gotta have TK on the boat. And like he's doing food shit now, we gotta get him food vlogging on it. Yeah. Isaac just wrote in the chat, Isaac by the way, there's a love hate with Isaac and TK. Yeah, I don't know what the pushback is.

Cause he's like, TK came to my birthday, how did that happen? Cause he's your friend man. He's known you for 20 years. I just wanna party. He didn't want him there apparently. I know, but I brought him. I brought him Sorry, and guess who else was holding you up on their shoulders

It was me and TK and those pictures are fucking cool Isaac they are and my wife weirdly was caressing TK's like Wet bald head in all in like a video that that Wendy posted I was like what happened there I must been off at the bar. I was intoxicated. Dude, he has a beautiful voice. He might have serenaded her. I don't know. He's got some pipes on him. Dude, I just saw a meme the other day that was like, you ever fuck up so bad with your girl you wish you could sing? And I was like, God, that's funny.

Can I finish? That's what I was. I wish I could. You could really, you could patch up a lot of stuff. Do I ever cross your mind? I'd try but... Please don't stop the music! Doesn't do anything for Glo. You gotta drop some McKnight. Please don't stop the music!

It has to be McKnight. You can only drop some McKnight. Shut the fuck up! Yeah, definitely. McKnight will get you there. Any take backs, any apologies, any epic slams? Any stand-bys, any apologies, any epic slams? Any stand-bys? Any... Oh, I definitely want to stand-by all my girls at Costa Mesa Hooters. I'm really bummed we're closing. And what were their names again?

It's been a great run. Sissy, Janessa. And this is the one off the freeway that's connected to the hotel. Off the freeway by the La Quinta Inn, which me and Ako, who Ako will also be on the cruise, Atiba and Ako, will have a night where they DJ. Dude, I love it. Me and Ako went to Isaac's party together. We debated staying at that La Quinta Inn, but we heard from... You got your asses home. Yeah, we got our asses home, and that was the right decision,

because that La Quinta Inn is shady. Shady aftermath. Yeah, most freeways directly off the freeway are... Most hotels next to a Hooters. Yeah. Like what? Fucking thing sucks! Yeah, it's a cool little one-two combo.

And also at night, it's an hour. If you have a driver, you know, it's not that bad. Yeah, we did it right. We did it right. We pulled the rip cord at the right time. I left right when I went into the class of 47 bathroom and Isaac was actually puking in the bathroom. Not to blow up your spot.

Hey! I should have. I swallowed all the alcohol and kept it down. I should have. I was hungover. My boat was parked like such an asshole. Oh, I think we jumped out while it was still moving, dude. This is cool. It's just floating in the bay.

See ya. See ya. Don Cade! Adam, real quick, I just want to circle back to, and this can be, you know, not what we end on, but you don't need to get into it. Okay. Talking about the guy who rolled up on the, and this can be, you know, not what we end on, but you don't need to get into it. Okay.

Talking about the guy who rolled up on the, and called you the F word, what's the thing you screamed at somebody when like you got in a bumper fender thing, and you were like, I'm having the worst day ever, or something. No, you said, I kept screaming, no. Fuck it.

This guy was like honking at me or something. I forget exactly what had happened, but I got out of my car and I Like maybe I took my shirt off which used to be like my go-to But then but then I was started screaming like you have no idea what kind of day I've had Which by the way my day was fine. Yeah, I had nothing bad had happened I think it worked to cry don't you cry a lot? And then that could work though for this. And then he got out of his car and he was like, dude, chill out.

And I'm like, fine, whatever. And I get back in my car and then he pulls up next to me and goes, hey man, I'm a fan and drove off. And it took me down 11 pegs. I felt so bad. If he said I used to be a fan, or a little... Whoa. How about...

Maybe if we're talking pegs, how many more pegs down? Yeah, that would have hurt. I would have been like, wait, wait, wait, wait. I would have definitely tried to repair that. Yeah, because you need every fan? Is that what you're... I just don't like people being mad at me That's one. No, I didn't like it. I did not like it and I was like, uh Yeah, I felt I felt very very bad. That's when I go. Hey get in line asshole Gets off on that being said he did honk at me. So he's

Fuck that guy. Thanks, Newsome He's dead to me. Yeah, so fuck him. Fuck yeah, fuck that guy. Thanks, Newsom. God damn. Thank you, Gavin. Thanks, Gavin. By the way, met him in person.

Very charismatic. Yeah, gotta be cool. Didn't wanna like him. He's hella hot, too. Super thick dick. Yeah, you could tell. Friendship. He's probably got a hot.

You could tell. Oh, remember when I broke my chair? That was crazy. Oh yeah. That was wild, way back when. I've just been sitting on a- So any take backs, any apologies, any epic slams? Oh, man when I broke my chair that was crazy. Oh, yeah So any take backs any apologies any epic flams I'm gonna go dude I'd love to take back the fact that I broke this damn chair cuz I don't have it I don't have another chair that spins like this damn it. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm, but maybe I switched to X-Men mode

Maybe you buy a chair that is in vintage plastic What the hell happened? This is crazy. This is an aged computer chair, dude. Aged 10 years, vintage plastic. Dude, this thing is tight. I liked this thing. It is cool. Hey, will you take your pants off and then walk in front of the camera with that in front of your dick?

Yeah. Dude, we need more YouTube followers. Just take your pants off. Yeah That with your dick And take back dude, this doesn't this does not block enough. Oh, yeah What are you talking about? It's not it's actually not big put it in front of the camera Put it really in front of the camera. Okay, we can't see shit and now take your clothes are closer closer closer And now your pants on now walk by fully nude. Oh, we can't see, we can't.

What? I see something. And Adam, when it happens to just blow, go. Foo, foo, foo. I think we can blow it over. See? Oh, hey. Are you being, are you doing it?

What are you doing? Did you do it? I don't know, what are you doing? Never mind. Oh, shit. Okay. Now I'm gonna see it it? I don't know what ever did never mind. Oh shit Okay, now I'm see it now. I don't have pants on oh good, and that was another episode Available on YouTube or wherever you get your podcast see ya you get your podcasts. See ya. Why is a soap opera Western like Yellowstone so wildly successful?

The American West with Dan Flores is the latest show from the Meat Eater podcast network. So join me starting Tuesday, May 6th, where we'll delve into stories of the West and come to understand how it helps inform the ways in which we experience the region today. Listen to The American West with Dan Flores on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I know a lot of cops.

And they get asked all the time, have you ever had to shoot your gun? Sometimes the answer is yes. But there's a company dedicated to a future where the answer will always be no. This is Absolute Season One, Taser Incorporated. I get right back there and it's bad. Listen to Absolute Season One, Taser Incorporated on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Over the years of making my true crime podcast, Hell and Gone, I've learned no town is too small for murder. I'm Katherine Townsend. I've heard from hundreds of people across the country with an unsolved murder in their community. I was calling about the murder of my husband. The murder

is still out there. Each week, I investigate a new case. If there's a case we should hear about, call 678-744-6145. Listen to Hell and Gone Murder Line on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Sometimes as dads, I think we're too hard on ourselves. We get down on ourselves on not being able to,

you know, we're the providers, but we also have to learn to take care of ourselves. A wrap-a-way, you got to pray for yourself as well as for everybody else, but never forget yourself. Self-love made me a better dad because I realized my worth. Never stop being a dad. That's dedication.

Find out more at fatherhood.gov. Brought to you by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services and the Ad Council. This is an iHeart Podcast.