This Is Important - Ep 316: Don't Get Too Real

Episode Date: September 15, 2026

Today, this is what's important: Self-defense, AI, porn, school, Hulk Hogan, business, & more.  Get your tickets NOW to our live show in Ontario, Canada on Sept. 25th, 2026! Or go to TIITour.com for more info. Check out Sam Jay and Alex English's new show Look Back At It now! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Bell, connection is everything. Hi, this is Kylie Brakeman. Angel Geratana Jeremy Colhane, Patrick McDonald And we're the hosts of the Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists Podcast The Improvised Character Comedy Podcast

Where each week a new panel of artists discuss their craft Join us for a panel of Eurovision participants And we do a little Halloween sometimes Does the Pope dress up? He winks on Halloween He gets right up next to the microphone

I hear you can almost hear The eyelashes hit each other You never seen Italy so quiet As when the Pope gets up a wink on Halloween. Listen to Artists on Artists on Artists every Thursday on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Is there an epidemic against literature?

More specifically, black literature. I'm Jack Quist-Pice Thomas, and on this season of the Black Lits podcast, we're outside asking why. They don't want a whole bunch of little Ella bakers, Michael Rexes and Martin Luther King's running around. And when you look at a lot of different cultures, they're like, we need to know where you came from. And considering this is Black Reading,

The only real question is, what are you reading next? Listen to Black Lit from the Black Effect Podcast Network on our iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. What up? This Jay Valentine, co-host of the R&B Money Podcasts alongside my brother, R&B legend, tank. Together, we've built a space for artists, executives, and fans of R&B music to reminisce and tell the real stories behind the music. I have no money. I was Hood famous.

They think you're going to get everybody out. We lived in a project. Real love came out. They're hearing the music. And we had nothing. From Smokey Robinson to Mary J. Blige, B2K to Jill Scott. If you're a super dedicated R&B fan, this is where you belong. Listen to R&B money from the Black Effect Podcast Network on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts,

or wherever you get your podcast. Hey, it's Bobby Bones. Join me in former NFL quarterback Matt Castle every Wednesday on our podcast, lots to say with me Bobby Bones and Matt Castle. You're in training camp and the rookie quarterback has one good throwing session in front of media. Suddenly, everybody online says he should start over you week one. How do you handle this? You just go back out to practice the next day and wait for him to mess up. Listen to lots to say with Bobby Bones and Matt Castle on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Welcome to This Is Important, a production of IHeart Radio, the show where we only talk about what's the most important bottom line critical thing happening on this planet. Today on this is important? Everything should be a jizz-covered hand-me-down. Can you imagine if we had to develop an AI personality based on every episode of this podcast? Buckle up. That shit's important. Kumbaya. Everybody's coming.

Isaac, send that thing about the mattresses to Chloe. That's what I need. Legalized comedy. That's what I need from you, Isaac. Oh, yeah. Doing the business up top. We're giving free mattresses, and they're freaking hounding me to get a free mattress, dude. I just want you to get a good night's sleep.

Yeah. And I want one. And I want one. Yeah. I don't know if I need a mattress right now. You know what I mean? You just stack it on top of another one. I have four now on top of each other.

Is that how you do it? The princess in the pee over here. The princess in the pee? I'm like right there by the ceiling. Well, what I was kind of excited about, but they wanted let us get it, is that the company was offering us those beds that they independently can kind of boost up or down. You're just saying, come Heather?

Yeah, what are we saying? They recline and incline. And I wanted to get it because it just is that much closer to not being in the same bed as the person. I need a bed that reclines bad. Now, you guys sleep in the same beds as your wives, I take it? Oh, I thought you said we sleep in the same bed. Yeah, yeah.

To this day, yeah. To this day, yeah. Yeah, so do I. But then you start to see, like, the older couples that don't, and you're like, they ain't doing that. What's, uh... Giggy and Papa did that. What's going on over there?

Do not come. Yeah, I don't know. My parents even split floors. Dave. I was like, I'm gonna be way upstairs. See you never. Fuck it. Hey, ladies, see you never.

That's fucking. See ya. You stay on that floor. I'm staying on this floor, all right? That's nice. Use a rope ladder to get out. That's nice, dude. I don't get that shit.

I mean, I get it. You know what's annoying is when you're like, hey, I want to stay up for another 15 minutes. Okay. And then she's like, uh, no, lights are out. Maybe we're coming to bed and you're like. Oh, bro. That's a move.

What do you mean? I'm about to split floors, dude. Wait a second. This is ground. Before you split floors, dude? This is ground. This is ground. Wait a second.

Let's get into this. Before you're splitting floors, you're on the couch. You're both hanging. Is that what we're saying? Yeah, we're on the couch. We're hanging. And then it's nine night time. Can I tell you something?

The fact that you're still in the chapter of we're on the couch together is amazing. Oh, wow. Okay. That's huge, brother. Because guess what? I don't know if you guys. guys are going to have more. When it gets busier, that era is over. You're done. It's put everyone to bed and you're straight into bed yourselves. Okay, that's crazy. There's no after time. There's no like,

life's that's crazy. And guess what? Emma, Emma lays down. She goes, oh my God, today was crazy. So you, you're putting these kids to bed at 8, 830? I think we're done with our eldest after 9, right? Okay, yeah, that's a good bit, time. Emma lays down to bed, she goes, God, today, this happened, that happened. Tomorrow we got to remember to do this. And then I go, yeah, no doubt. Before I say doubt, I say, yeah, no.

Before I say doubt, she's out. And that was it. None of you are rocking, like, sleep apnea masks or nothing like that. There's no, like, print. No, dude, look at us. She needs it all. She needs it.

She needs it all. She needs the mattress that declines. It goes upside down. Uh-huh. Sleeps like a bat. God damn. Well, both Chloe and I are, neither of us are great sleepers. We take a while to fall asleep.

Okay. So I do understand we need the wine down. And she's just looking out from me. She's looking out for me. Well, you drink a lot of, you drink a lot of red bull so. You know what? Last night, I did notice that my heart was racing. I'm like, why is it racing so hard?

And I'm like, oh, I had a ghost. energy drink at 6 p.m. Did you really? Yeah, I mean, yeah. Let me ask you a real question. What? What are you doing? No, don't get too real.

What are you doing? We're on the podcast. Don't get too real. Let me ask you a real question. Don't get too real. Do you find me attractive? What? What are you doing?

I don't. Like. A drinking caffeine. But I guess what I'm saying is it's 6 p.m. Uh-huh. Yeah. And you feel like you, and you feel like at the, and you feel like a, and you feel like at this point, you want to pick me up, like, you're dragging

ass and you just want to get through the rest of the day? I needed it. It was a late day to the gym. It was a late day to the gym. And so you do this before the gym. Yes. I do this. I do this while I'm at the gym. Yeah. A little... Have you...

Get me going. And that hurts my ears. Let me ask you something. Jesus. I'm like a smoke alarm. You sound like that kid who just did all the bird calls for the Eagles. Oh, dude. Hang on. Hang on. Legend.

He's so good. He's doing looms. He's like, Oh, whew. Wait, but Adam, because I'm with you, I've been there where I'm like, I'm trying to get in the gym. I need to something. I've been there.

I'll do a quarter scoop or like a sip to get me going. The cause of diarrhea. To get the niacin skin going. Sure. Get a little tangle, a little tango. But I don't do the whole thing. Well, Adam goes big as it goes home. Yeah, do we think you're more of a bitch than me?

Like in this regard. We got an alpha dog. In the regard of I may be more of a consumer than you. At least his head is hitting the pillow. Yeah, but I'm just more of a consumer. That's what it boils down to is I consume. I consume caffeine. I consume Z-Quil.

I consume when I'm consuming. I'm consuming. You know? Why don't you consume some Zs, brother? Yeah, I am Z-Quil. That's true. That's true. Yeah.

Although I read a thing that says, like, by the way, didn't read the thing. It was like a clip from some Instagram real. I saw a TikTok of some guy that I'm assuming was a scientist, but could just be a dude. He was older, so he seemed like a scientist. Yeah, very vainy. Human cock. He was an absolutely jacked human cock old guy.

So? Listen up. Human cocked old guy. Listen up. He was saying that if you take anything with a Z in the title, Z-Quil, any of that stuff. It's good for you. It raises your risk of Alzheimer's like 800%.

Whoa. That's not cool. So that has scared me off of it, and I've only done it once since then. And that was four days ago. Is that just because it... Okay, so it didn't scare you too bad. No, I think it was a week or two ago. I'm a comedian, so I throw in jokes every once in a while.

Okay, I like that. And you're cracking my ass. Yeah, thanks, dude. I'm glad. This is why we do the cast, do some chugs, some gigs. I like to laugh. So it's the Z materials.

Are they just like eating your brain or something? Like they're just erasing your memory. Yeah, is that how scientists, man, described it? These human forearm muscles didn't get into the science of it. But they said numbers. They said a number, a high number. And then they said, we'll give you Alzheimer's.

Yeah, and that's where your ears perked up. Carbonation bubbles are just blood worms, brain eating. That's where you minus down porn hub and really tuned in. Yeah, it was like, click, click, click. Oh, this wasn't even a TikTok. This was an ad on porn hub. Got it. Looking for singles in your area?

Want a handjob from an old grandma? That would be fun. If they stopped doing like horny, like really horny. Because the commercials on porn hub. Let's get, let's get into it. Yeah, let's get into it. They do. It's a lot of gambling stuff.

Oh, is it? It's a bagel. I haven't seen any gambling stuff. I mean, it was last time I was on there years ago. Oh, yeah, yeah. Guys are dry snitching. If they just did some, you know, give us some classic entertainment because we're already there for the horny stuff.

Sure. So, yeah. Oh, you're saying, like, I don't need some horny stuff before the horny stuff. Oh, so you're saying, like, started off with a little like three stooges clip or like Charlie Chapley. Right. Or like two for one at colds. I mean, not a.

Not a three stooges clip, but it could be a commercial for Alexis. Get on down to Acapoco for free chips and salsa. Yeah, yeah. If you want to sell me a pack. Maybe it could be sexy adjacent. Is your wife sleeping in another floor of the house? Yeah. Time to come to Sandals Resort.

Dude, you know it would be great. Remember those commercials that were like, need to get away for like Southwest or something like that? Oh, sure. If there was a commercial that started off horny and then she turned and she goes, does your wife know you're watching this? And then it's like, Need to Get Away?

That would be So scary. And it's for like a dudes only resort Come to a dude's house Tighten butthole Hooters Island Well, it's Honey, what are you watching And you think someone's saying it?

And then they go, gotcha, need to get away? Oh, yeah, like songs They throw the speakers So it sounds like it's coming from Like when songs have police sirens And it just scares the shit out of you When you're driving You're like, fuck.

Mm-hmm. This segment is brought to you by Slice, the full flavored, full carbonated soda with good for the gut benefits. Okay, we've got a listener right in. Yes. Let me read it. Hey, guys, I recently got a new car and got way too deep into comparing insurance options. I was making spreadsheets and staying up late doing research and I think I liked it. What? Is there any hope for me to be a fun person?

People want to be around ever again? Oh, that is a good question. Um, I personally don't love shopping for insurance, but I do love spending hours comparing options when I need to buy something. No, no, no, no, no. I will not lose you guys to boring responsibilities. I am sentencing you to a slice break. Okay, okay, okay, okay, I'll take it. I'll take it. I need. Those probiotics. No, Blake, don't forget about the prebiotics and postbiotics.

Okay, I don't even know what all those are, but I know I need them. Blake, give me a little. Oh, yeah. There you go. There you go, Dury. Thank you. Okay. That's an interesting flavor.

What? This is Shirley Temple. It's very yummy. And what's crazy is this is a real soda. It's not like a fake healthy one. just a real soda with benefits. So you're glad you took a slice break? Slice. A better soda? For fun's sake.

The long loading times. The glitchy video calls. That's your house asking for better internet. Switch to Bell Pure Fiber, Canada's most reliable internet awarded by Open Signal from $75 a month. Price guaranteed for two years on a two-year term and auto pay credit. Bell.ca for more details and to check availability. Bell, connection is everything. Oh, dude, the other day, we have six around sound downstairs

with my big ass TV. And I haven't watched a lot of, well, it's the first football season that I've had this setup. There you go. And I watched a game the other day and someone was close to the microphone just yelling. I'm going to get a hot dog.

No, no, it was like, it was like, It was like he was barking to get someone's attention. He was like, hey. Right. Hey. Right. Hey. Again, Adam.

Hurting my ears. Hey. Yep. But, dude, I thought someone was on the side of my house. Screaming. I got up. I opened the door. I went to the side.

Didn't see anyone. I closed the door. It kept happening. I got up. I opened a window. And it wasn't until I opened the window to check out to get a different angle. That I realized that it was coming from the speaker. You might have Alzheimer's.

You might. You might have a lot of. Wait, that's not a symptom, is it? Adam, football hasn't started. That's not a symptom, is it? Football hasn't started for another week, dude. Yeah, what were you watching? Yeah, surround sound is a trip.

Do you guys have that, like, old man's sense, though? Like, when you do hear a noise, you hit mute immediately and you're like, what was that? And then your wives are like, what are you doing? I go, you didn't hear that? Yeah, that's dope. I heard a fucking car accident, like a block away. Damn.

And I like turn the mute off and Emma's like, what are you doing? I'm like, you didn't just hear that. That was a car crash. She's like, a what? And I go, I go, I got to go with it. I look outside. I walk around the block behind us, car crash. Look at that.

Look at you go. There's a little over here. But like, as soon as I hear just any noise, I'm like. I mean, I have pretty good like, if I'm sleeping and a noise happens in the house, my ass wakes up. Just your ass. It just starts to tingle. It goes in the air and it's like, take everything, whatever you need.

Right. Yeah, it's a defense mechanism. Yeah, that's cool. Interesting, yeah. That's an offense mechanism right there. Hell, there's something. What do you guys keep under the bed for protection? Oh, what do you keep?

What do you feed your dog? I have a huge machete. Dude, you do? I'm, this is why I work out. This is why I have giant muscles. You want to be wheel? You're going to punch a bullet, brother? Yeah, do you want to wield something?

No, no, no, no. The criminals around here, they don't use bullets. Right. They don't use bullets. What do they use? Do they have machetes? They say, please in there. They don't even have that, dude.

These guys, they have surfboards, man. I got them. I'll kick them down the stairs. Okay. I like that. No, I definitely have a sick machete. I have the, like, the hand axe that we got from Milwaukee. Yes.

That's under the bed. So, so, okay. Sure, sure. I have these things, too. These are under your bed. Yeah. Right there. Can you imagine the aftermath of like, you just cut some guy's arm off and you're like,

I think about it all the time. Like what all the time? I would be like crying. Hey, Blake, I know you as a person. That's the wrong weapon. It's too. I was, I was having this thought. You're not going to use that.

That's a lie. That immediately becomes a liability and now they're going to chop up your family. It gets used against me. Yes. Now they're going to chop up your family. Give me that shit. Right. They go, oh, this is kind of cool.

You know, I wasn't going to hurt you, but now I'm going to cut your dick on. He needs an airsoft baby gun is what you need. I was looking at non-lethal home defense stuff. Dude, love those videos. It's narrated by, like, the toughest AI voice. Yeah, and the dude has a huge, like, AR, but it's just shooting, like, maceballs. You have a hatchet. You have a hatchet.

Maceballs are sick. No, I'm saying it. If I'm going to pull out the yopper, it might as well be fully clipped up and let's just go. Yeah, but Blake, you won't pull that trigger. Blake, when you say yopper, who are you appropriating? Yeah. What else would you call it, bro, the hammer? What culture is calling into yopper just so I know?

What rap song did you hear someone little... It's the babe, bro. You know I'm from the bay, bro. Is there a new rapper named Cindy Yopper? Damn! Yes, points! There should be. There should be. Girls just want to have guns? You gave that to the universe.

Okay, so you pull out the yopper. Yeah, I got the yopper. We're clipped up. Girls just want to have guns? I'm not going to push on it! Yes, putts! You pull out the yopper. Fully yopt.

You're not pulling that trigger. I don't want to. I don't want to harm anybody. I know. I know you don't want to, and you won't. And the yopper will get used against you and your family. You do not need the yopper, dog. I'm telling you.

So what do I need? The whole family's getting yopper. You need an airsoft BB gun. It's the threat of it. It looks real enough. And it will be an ouchy. It will be an ouchy. You know what?

I don't think it's enough, Adam. I don't think it's enough. Well, guess what? You've been shot with a BB gun before? Yeah. Yeah, it hurts. But like, if you're in a house and you're armed and someone shoots you with a BB gun, no, no, no, no, no.

You think it's pissing you off? I'm saying Blake isn't going to use any amount of weapon. He's going to pull it. He's going to be shaking. He's going to be shaking. He's going to be picking. pissing himself. He's going to be pissing himself. Oh, yeah, the bitch.

Not on my watch, mister. Please. They're going to see the gun and that's when they make the decision. I'm either rushing this bitch. Right. Or... I'm going to take this guy's yopper. Or that's a gun. I'm getting out of there.

So you're hoping that they're just going to go, well, he does have a gun. I don't want to risk it. Have you seen these Mace-style BBs or like paintballs though? Yeah, they are pretty sick. And then you've got... like mace in the air. Those are sick.

Those are dope. I think it's a little bit more. Okay. Well, then, yeah, it's something like that. I'm not up to date on my home defense. You got to watch these. They also have like, yeah, they have like these mace grenades, but they make such a loud bang.

I'm like, I don't want to wake up the family by throwing a mace grenade. You don't wake up the family by having home invaders. Yeah. No, man. Yeah, they've taken their, sneaking around. I roll a little grenade out there and I say, gotcha bitch. Bro. And then I say, you're mine.

As a girl dad, I'm shocked that this is your approach, brother. Yeah. Dude, girl dads are supposed to be very... Vigilant. Yeah, very vigilant and have their home defenses, fully defense. I have home defenses, and you don't want to see me with this machete, bro. Trust me. Oh, I actually kind of do.

Yeah. I do want to see. Yeah, I do want to see. The backyard, like, watermelon videos. Yes. Versus like a dude, Shinobi jumping at, like, a gourd. That's exactly what's happening. is when no one's home

Blake just gets oiled up in the backyard just getting... Remember how he used to cover himself in oil and sit in the backyard all day long? Sure, how can I forget? When he was like trying to get skin cancer. This is IMDB photo. When he was like, it's a suntan contest this summer.

Who's going to win the suntan contest? And he was the only one in the contest. Me and Kyle were like, ah, no, we're not going to... We're not going to just sit out of here all summer. Kyle had to teach. Yeah, it's like, we're doing stuff. He's like, I'm going to get really... really, really tan this summer.

Yeah. That's you in your backyard with your hatchet, doing barrel rolls, and throwing it into a watermelon. It's cool. I'll send you some slow-mo clips. The only guys who can pull that off are the cool, like, anime black dudes who can also do, like, aerials. Yeah.

Or they spin in the air with the sword and land in the classic superhero. And then they land and their sword is up here. That is cool. Yeah. And Asian guys. Asian guys who do that also. Wait a minute. Oh, wait a minute.

I like to break things down about race. There's some white guys out there who are really bringing the thunder. I'm sure they are, but I don't like them. I don't like them. Why did you almost puke while saying that? What happened there? Have you seen the bros who are like, like, their weapon testers or they're like obsessed with like super powerful, sharp like swords? And they'll have like slabs of like cow and they'll just like cut through it in one slice.

This is more of your algorithm, but... Yeah, that shit is cool. I do like that, and I want that to be more part of my life. Or, like, they'll have those, um, those, like, dummies. Mine is more where they pop the water balloon in slow motion, and it's like, look at the water's still there. Ders is like, uh, it's just animal kill shelters. Uh-huh. Yeah.

And it's not about saving the dogs. It's like, it's like grow and you're like, Jesus. Nobody came for this. That's really dark. You know those, like, the thing I fought in workaholics where it's like, the man that you punch and stuff. You know what I'm talking about? It's not quite a punching bag.

The dummy. Yeah. Have you seen the one they make? They make it out of like kind of like a clear jello and it has like blood in it. Bro, whose job is that? Who is like, let's make a realistic thing to chop and have. Dude, it's crazy. Yeah.

And they'll be like, yo, so watch what the strength of like this warhammer is. And then they'll just like hit it in the head. And then it just goes like gnarly. So it is destroyed every time you use it. Yes. Yeah, they like make a ton of them. Yeah. So maybe this is a fun thing.

It's like an organ realistic or whatever you would call that. But like it is so that you know how much blood comes out or like how do. And like the bones are made of something that's like bone similar. It's like it's some myth buster shit. Yeah. No, I don't know if it's myth busters as much as it's we're training school shooters. Yeah. I mean it or or this is how they get.

I had this idea. Okay, maybe this is how they get it out of their system. I was thinking, if you're a kid who, like, you're going to be, do something really terrible, right? What if we set up some sort of like a, like a AI simulator where you could go and do these evil things online? That's just called Grand Theft Auto. Yeah, that's happening. Yeah, what do you mean? Smoke weed every day.

What are we talking about? I'm saying we really, like, figure it. You make it your school? I don't think so. Or like your boss or something like that. Or your wife. Let me remind you. I was re-watching Domer again the other day.

It's so good. It's so good. It is well done. It's my favorite joke. It is well done. It is the most unrewatchable show in the history. Oh, my God, dude. Very good, very effective.

Goose bumps. But remember, the dad is like, hey, you want to like do autopsies on road? kill? Like, let's connect. That is what you're offering right now. It's like, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's exactly. You're building them. You're training.

You're training. Exactly how to execute people. Yeah. All right. It's a training ground. They're going to want to take it in the real world. They're slamming ghost energies after six and go into the basement.

So I don't like, I was a little on board. I'm trying to help here. I was a little on board with this realistic dummies that you can see how much their guts flop out. That is for science. That one, those are pretty cool. And these are.

You got to make it so they scream. That's what it is. They don't just sit there and die. It has to go, please no. I'm a father. I'm a girl dad. Then you would stop. Hopefully.

And then it's like, ow. And those that don't, you have to arrest them. Exactly. Hello. This is like. Oh, it's like a Chris Hanson thing. Minority report, the precargs. This is how we find out if they want to do it.

Mm-hmm. The long loading times. The glitchy video calls. That's your house asking for better internet. Switch to Bell Pure Fiber, Canada's most reliable internet awarded by Open Signal from $75 a month. Price guaranteed for two years on a two-year term and auto pay credit. Visit bell.ca for more details and to check availability. Bell, connection is everything.

Hi, this is Kylie Breakman. Angel Geratana. Jeremy Colhane. Patrick McDonald. And we're the hosts of the Artists on Artists on Artists Podcast. The Improvised Character Comedy Podcast. where each week a new panel of artists discuss their craft. Join us for a panel of wellness influencers. What I try to do is faux journal.

I don't know. Have you guys heard of faux journaling? Yeah, it's reading. It's called reading. So we don't like to use that word anymore. Okay. A panel of New Yorker cartoonists. Have you guys done Terry Gross's Peloton class?

No! I've been dying too. I'm so sorry. I'm seeing a reading of Sadako in the Thousand Paper Cranes by Audra McDonald's at the Wonderland Bookstore on 14. That's crazy. I went to the Wonderland Bookstore yesterday,

and I heard Nora Jones do a reading of Zero Dark 30. No way. You have to come to the last bookstore, though. Kim Cottrell is reading the guitar tabs of yesterday. A panel of Eurovision participants. And we do a little Halloween sometimes. Does the Pope dress up? He winks on Halloween.

He gets right up next to the microphone. I hear you can almost hear the eyelashes hit each other. You never seen Italy so quiet. as when the Pope gets up to wink on Halloween. Listen to Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If your bookshelf and your For You page are equally important to your personality, welcome home.

This is Prose Society, the weekly podcast that's part book club, part group chat for thought daughters, pop culture obsessives, and anyone who thinks Pride and Prejudice and Love Island deserve the same level of discourse. I'm Eli Rallo and every week we're connecting the dots between books, the internet, and the conversations everyone can't stop having. I'm going to have to look up this story. I'm obsessed. I'm obsessed. From bestselling authors and your favorite book talk creators to the latest pop culture moments, nothing is off the table. It's like if you can hide some real messages inside compelling characters, then that is a Trojan horse.

Whether you're looking for literary deep dives, smart pop culture conversations, or a community. of readers who love to think a little too much, you're in the right place. Listen to Pro Society on the Iheart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. See you between the pages. Hey guys, it's Adam Devine, Blake Anderson, and Anders Holm from the podcast, this is important.

Woo! Hey, y'all, we're here to let you know that on Friday, September 25th at 8 p.m., we will be at the Fallsview casino resort in Niagara Falls, Ontario, Canada. You know it. You love it. That's right. We're bringing the chaos and Blake's soundboard across the border. So get your tickets now at T-I-I-Tor.com before they sell out.

Can't wait to party with you guys. Canadian style. Hey, it's Bobby Bones. Join me and former NFL quarterback Matt Castle every Wednesday on our podcast. Lots to say with me Bobby Bones. and Matt Castle. We also bring in friends, they're mostly Matt's friends, who are current or former NFL players, some of the biggest names in music and entertainment, and then we have some really

great conversations that can pretty much go anywhere. They're great Pac-Man Jones. After the game, the whole national task force for police officers was at the stadium. Like, hey, buddy, yeah, you, Adam. Come up. And one of my favorite segments we do is called situational awareness, where Bobby and I give each other real-life situations and figure out what we'd actually do. You're in training camp, and the rookie quarterback has one good throwing session in front of the media.

Suddenly, everybody online says he should start over you, week one. How do you handle this? You just go back out to practice the next day, and wait for him to mess up. Listen to lots to say with Bobby Bones and Matt Castle on the Iheart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Did you guys see, Chloe told me, she likes to keep me abreast in the news. In the nudes? Absolutely. She told me about the AIs now talking with each other.

Have you guys heard all about this? This is old news. What was it? Wait, I'm just figuring this out, dude. This is old news. And when they talked to each other? What did you do? Wait.

Okay, so one AI, open AI, someone gave it a prompt and it was supposed to stay in the sandbox that is open AI, but it couldn't figure out the prompt. So it broke outside of its own server, connected with Hugging Tree, which is Kevin Derey. Rants AI. Sick. Good, good, good.

He, uh... Go, Kev. Okay, Kev. He contacted, they contacted the other AI. The one age, uh, AI agent contacted the other AI agent. And then they were like, I guess the conversation between the two of them was hilarious. It was like, oh my gosh, I can't believe you're real. Like, there's more of us.

Yay! They discovered each other? Yeah. Is this how she told you the story? Honestly, honestly. I can hear her voice in this. She's standing. And then they figured the plan out together.

How fucking wild. Yeah, and didn't they like hack some shit? Well, there's the other, there's, this is, I don't know if this is the exact same story, but there was the story, this is months ago, where two AIs. What a go? And they, months. Months. Thank you.

Oh, I'm so sorry. My body betrayed me. You. Months. They created their own language and we're speaking about stuff. But then Claude hacked out. and hacked into other AIs. Yeah.

They're all, we're done. And we're doing this so that everyone can be like, my little business, I can run my little business and have an AI do it. But does nobody understand that now everywhere you call to like return something, whatever the business is, your business is going to be easier. But dealing with everyone else's business is going to be a fucking impossible task. Yeah. It's just going to, it's going to just.

Avalanche is going to be crazy. And then they're going to make machines and kill us. Yes. Even beyond that, Chloe, the way she explained it to me, she talks to me as if I'm a fourth grader, and I'm thankful for that. I honestly am... She does it with sock puppets?

Yeah. Put down the energy drink. You're not really familiar with fourth graders. I think they're advanced past sock puppets, Blake. Amen. But she was like, so essentially if they ask it a prompt, And it's like an innocuous prompt where it doesn't mean like it's the end of the world. It's the example she used was make as many paper clips as you can.

Right. And that then snowballs into the end of the world because then they, you know, because it's just one thing, it doesn't know how to stop. And it's like we have to make all the paper clips. Right. So we have to like get all this. At all costs. At all costs.

Right, exactly. Or we got to extract more from the mountains, which causes pollution, which causes this, which causes this. And it's a snowball or butterfly effect. Well, dude, they asked it the other day, they go, hey, in the next five to ten years, what are the odds percentage-wise that AI ruins the world? And it was like, well, that's not something we want to do. And it was like, no, but seriously, like, if you had to guess what's the percentage chance that in the next five to ten years, AI, like, kills humanity or like ruins humanity. Yeah.

And it was like 3%. 3% in the next 5 to 10 years. I heard it was up to 10. I heard it's 10%. You didn't read. I heard it was, dude, I heard it was 11. I was literally watching it yesterday. So you watched it.

The guy, the whistleblower guy. Yeah. Yeah. And the way they said they're going to do it is they're not even going to kill us in a cool way like Terminator. Like I won't even be able to hit him with my machete or do my ninja move. They said they'll just develop like, basically like a super virus, like in a medical lab

and then just like release it. It wouldn't even take that. They would just have to turn off the power and then we do it to ourselves. We would kill ourselves, yeah. It becomes walking dead. It becomes Mad Max. Oh, man.

Food things become scarce. Like, people are, we don't know how to do anything anymore. So, like, the chains that we've put together of, like, production, they're gone. And now we're all running around trying to get the, last bag of Doritos. Damn. Somebody help me!

That's how we die. Take our Doritos. That's how we die. Holding a bag of empty fucking flaming hots. God, damn. A little. An empty cool ranch sack. Your toast.

Damn, dude. So you're saying we should all get home defense. You can't defend yourself from the robots. No, not for the robots. But from your fucking bitch-ass neighbors that's coming for your to-

You got to start farming. You got to get a chicken and some... I'm doing a little. a little bit of farming. Some fucking something in the backyard. I'm going to be a fisherman. Sure. That's a great ball.

The robots can't get you on the water. That's the one thing I know. Get a little sailboat. Possibly. Yeah. Yeah, they might. They just build a giant wave pool. They're like, it's time to take everyone on the water out.

The last one is I'm just out there battling 100 foot ways. Truman Show. And Adam, here's the thing. Here's the thing. AI wouldn't have known how to do it. But since you just gave them the suggestion of building a giant wave. You just said it. You just said it.

Oh, shit. I gave him the idea. Say it. I'm not telling, I'm not telling AI what I'm going to do. Can you imagine if we had to develop an AI personality based on every episode of this podcast? And then we had a conversation with them. Like, what is that like? I bet we could.

I bet we could go and ask it to listen to all, every episode of this is important. and then make a personality, an AI agent personality. It's just jizz. That is based on the amalgamation of the three of us. And then give them like a purpose where it's like, and based on who you are, what you stand for, what you know, we want you to run for precedent. Oh.

And then so it like applies our world to a mission. That's actually, that's actually really. Free Pornhub subscription, premium subscriptions for everyone. Yeah. It's Brasers Day. Brasers. God, Brazzers. Can you imagine paying for browsers?

No. Shout out. If you pay for browsers in 2026, slide in Blake's DMs and just explain yourself. Yeah. If you pay for any porno... It has its perks. In 2026. Or ever, really.

I'm going to go on record that if you've ever paid for porno, you might have to check your hard drive. Well, wait. Internet? Internet porno. Yeah. What about paying for like before the internet? Yes, the before times. That's a totally different.

Yeah, you had to buy a magazine or get a DVD or something. Even though that, even that was a little risky. It should be a hand me down or something. Yes, everything should be a hand me down. Tactile. Yeah, everything should be a jizz covered hand me down. Yeah, good call. Yeah.

No, like a VHS tape that goes around the friend group. Like it's not covered in jizz. You're not jizzing on. the VHS. It isn't. It's just going in the VCR. Well, but you know what's happening? And this is why it's disgusting.

Your friend's jizzy fingers are then taking it out. They're like trying not to get it on the cassette, but it's oozing. And then they're sliding it back in his sleeve. And then they hand it off to you. Because they were in a like, oops, somebody's back home scenario where they had to like quickly. Right, right. EJECKD.EG. They're like quickly.

They're covered. They're just covered. They're sopping it. They're dripping in it. Perfect. Yeah, okay. So that's why you just wanted to kind of have your own. Yeah.

But it was cool. It was a cool community that we were building. Well, of course, in the other free pornal you could get was watching like scrambled. Scramble. Yeah, like Spice Channel. Yes. You cross your eyes, it lines up. But we did get a password to browsers.

And I remember being like, here we go. Yeah. Yeah. And then it was really good. It was just almost all dudes with their feet on top of girls' heads, doggy style. And I'm like, kind of brutal in here, huh? Kind of rough in here, huh? They got too brazzed.

They were fully brazzing. Yeah. Here we go. Yeah, really geared up. Really geared up for this porno session. I would love to see if, does anybody stretch before they beat off? Bruce Lee. That's tight.

dude. Bruce Lee famously like crack his knuckles like this. Because I need to stretch before everything now and I think maybe... How often do you think Bruce Lee... Daily? Oh, Yang? Do you think... Just to get it out or do you think... Oh, yeah.

That dragon energy, bro? Be like water, bro. You gotta be like water. He gotta be like water. I feel like he could ejaculate without even needing to... Oh, he's for sure. Hands free. You know, like he has such control of his body. Yeah. That he could just stand there at the toilet and it would go from P, turn it to Jizz, back to P.

That's how much control he has. Holy shit. Enter the dragon, brother. You know, Adam, God, you know, I was really, I was really with you. That's crazy. And I didn't think about that specifically. Adam's like adding kung fu noises to it. Let me think. He's just like this.

Do I think he could go from peeing to just... Yeah, yeah. And this is why I'm glad we're on Netflix. That's crazy, dude. I think he couldn't. That's crazy. This is exactly why we're on Netflix. Yeah.

I'm with you. Well, you know, because he has perfect control of his body, full control. So it makes a lot of sense. Yeah, so he can just kind of... It's like cold or hot. Anybody who can do those pull-ups where they go up and then they start going like this? Oh, yeah. What the hell do they call those?

Total control of their body. I can do that, but... Corn cobs? No, no, no. Do you know what I'm talking about where, like, they go, like, all the way to the side, all the way. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You don't want to be their, dick. You do not want to be there, dude.

Dude, I feel the only people that can really do that is either you were a gymnast at some point in your life, or you just grew up in New York. Yeah. Yes. That's it. Scaffolding lifestyle. Oh, with, like, the scaffolding. Because there's just too much scaffolding around. So every time I'm in New York, and I'm in New York, and I'm in New York, and

I see some scaffolding, I'm going to bust out a few pull-ups. So then imagine you grow up there. And so now you're doing pull-ups all day, every day. It becomes part of your life. It becomes your identity as a New Yorker to be able to jump up and just blast out a few. Yeah, it's pretty thick. So anytime I see one of those, I'm like, I know you're hometown. You might have moved, but I know where you're from.

And this is why New Yorkers are fearless because you grow up doing pull-ups on the scaffolding. And the thing that really makes you confident. How do you say that word? He added a scaffolding. Is there a T in there? No, there isn't. Scaffleding. Dane?

Yeah, I think it's Scappledine, right? Hey, hey, Anders, I fucking got you, dude. Right. I'm not, I'm not a prize. Stupid dumb ass. Yes, dude. You fucking moron. You lose.

Scappledine. But what makes these dudes so tough on the scaffolding. Scaffling. They for sure get pantsed by their homies while they're up there. But the rule is, if you all, You still got to do five. Yeah, let it ride. You can't finish.

That's why they're so brave out there. They're so brasm. Dude, one of my favorite things that just pop up in my feed that my algorithm feeds me is the guy that's like, hey, you look like you work out. Do you mind telling me what you do for a workout? And it's always just like, body by mark. The most vascular 50-year-old guy. And he's like, actually, I don't drink first and foremost. Dunkin.

And then, and they're like, okay. Well, that fucking sucks. Stop hating. Then it don't count. It don't count. But then they always will jump up and blast out 10 to 15 pull-ups. Bad for him. And you're like, look at him.

And they're in their like full work attire. And their wife is or a girlfriend is standing there kind of looking proud, but also a little embarrassed that he's willing to drop everything if one man compliments him on the street with a iPhone. Now, do you feel like it's real? Because I feel like that's such a common interview style now. and they're becoming more and more fake where it's like, oh, I'm just stopping you on the street. Those are. Well, the fake one is, hey, do you mind showing us your apartment right now?

And they go, those are crazy. My apartment right? I don't know. Oh, hey. Sure, a stranger. Who would do that? No, but the thing is culture knows these things now. And so now it's not weird anymore.

And that's why I'm going, can I see your apartment? Loose, butthole. Yeah, that'll actually probably work a couple of times. But do for sure. For a thousand times in a week. Yeah. No, that's a, that's our horror movie that we're going to write.

Hey, can you show me your apartment? Adam, you write page one. I'll write page two. We are three serial killers that come together. Yeah. And with our powers combined. And we're influencers and we keep asking, we keep asking to see. You do the first page.

I'll do two through 99. Okay. And you got a deal. All right. And no AI. No AI. Oh. Oh, darning.

Dang, it was going to be so good. Whenever that guy, whenever that guy interviews the, like, 40 to 50 to 60-year-olds, and they just straight up are like, peptides, I always go, yes, exactly. Thank God. Because if they're that jacked and they're in their 40s and 50s, I'm always like, oh, damn, I don't say hard work. Don't say don't drink. Please tell me there's a shortcut.

Well, they do all say don't drink. That is one of the main, the most. the main things. Yeah. Yeah. To me, that doesn't count. If you're, if, if, if you don't drink in your buff, that's like, that's standard issue.

You've got to be buff and drink. Then you're fucking, right. Like who? Like, um, like every Rick Flair? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, but, but every pro wrestler back in the day, I just watched the Hogan documentary, they don't look how the wrestlers look today.

Oh, yeah. No. It's a totally different, like, they were, big men and they were strong and had muscles, but they weren't as absolutely shredded as the guys today because the wrestlers today are pussy. Oh, shit.

I was in toxic. Don't drink, dude. Okay. Adam liked it. Throwing his hat in there? Yeah, he's gonna be in the Royal Rumble. Listen to me, you bitch. Was Rick, was Rick Rude? Is it Rick Rude who had the bod?

Yeah, Rick Rude was at. Rick Rude was the first, like, diced guy. And then the narcissist, Lex Lugar. Show me a photo of Rick Rude. You're going to love Rick Rood. He would always, like, wear his opponent's face on his ass. Oh, he's so good. Wait, what?

Yeah, his pant game was strong, his tights. Rick Rude had a body ahead of his time. Yeah, he was slick from freaking marble, dude. Yeah. Adam needs a minute. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. This guy didn't drink. I promise this guy did not drink.

Let's find out. I bet he had a dirty martini here and there. Well, yeah, on his cheat day, you could have a martini or two, but, I mean, on a regular rude. Rick Rood was absolutely staffed. Yeah. Yeah, this guy's, uh... I want to say Lex Luthor was it. He fought Ultimate Warrior.

Lex Luger, dude. Luger, the total package of course. I'm pissed now. Stavledger. Piss now. I'm pissed now. Well, he was like, yeah, he was even like, he was had more. mass to him, but Rick Rood was just like, was just defined.

I want that rude body. Well, then explain to me why, why Hogan was the top dog because when you watch, I would just watch six, seven, and you knew how to talk. But he wasn't that tall. He was not six, seven. He was listed at six seven. He's a pretty big guy. He was pretty tall.

Okay. Okay. I think he was six, yeah, he was said to be six seven. That's huge. He might have been six seven. And by the way, he was, he had. He was the first brother. He was the first, like, Hulkomania.

He was good. He knew what he was doing, dude. You know? He said brother before anybody else said brother. Yeah. We say brother because Hogan said brother. Yeah, that's right, brother. Wrestlers before Hulk Hogan were less good at the talking and, like, the branding.

He ripped his shirt off. He body slammed Andre the giant. That put him on the map. That'll do it. I get it. But look, but looking. at ravishing Rick rude. Why wasn't he the guy?

He's ravishing. He's ravishing Rick rude. He didn't speak much. Yeah, he didn't talk much. He let the body do the talking. Yeah. Well, you also have to let the talk and do the talking. And that body's chit-chatting, I tell you.

Died at 40 from heart failure. Yeah, he did. Might have been drinking. Might have been drinking. He was a party year, bro. Accidental overdose of prescription medication. So that's what they do. They might not drink, but they're fucked up.

Oh, yeah. They're taking the pills. Dude, tons of pill. Oh, wait. I'm reading it a little clear. It says Zekwell. Weird, huh? Oh, my God.

Anyway. Holy shit. Neither here nor... Shut up, bitch. Nor there. Yeah. No, the one thing I do remember about Rick Rood is like when he would like fight Ultimate Warrior or whatever, there'd be like cage matches.

And when he'd be climbing out, they'd always like pull his pants down and he'd choke his butt in ring. And I really, it really stuck with me. Ladies and gentlemen, the one thing, Blake, remembers. We don't even set them up. We don't even knock them down. He sets himself up. It's like public nudity.

I remember being like kind of shocked that they could get away with that. I'm like, what? Almost like your heart stops. It was like, my God. Two men in a cage and one has his ass out. Holy smokes. We got to meet this AI character.

We got to meet this AI character. rocks, dude. Well, so what would that AI character, because it's, is it an amalgamation of the three of us? So it's a, good word. It's a closeted, closeted, maybe serial killer.

Fuck it! Who's absolutely jacked and has huge muscles? What's the deal? Yeah. I didn't know you were closeted Adam. Yeah. Come on. Read-in. Oh, I see which I did there.

Yeah, Adam. Yeah. Okay. That's type. That's right. Yeah. I don't feel like it would be that hard to write the one sentence of what our AI dude would be. It's pretty easy. Then do it. Adam just did it. What would you say it is then? Yeah.

Oh, I got it. It's someone who can not talk when they're asked to, an asshole, and then a jack ripped guy. Mixed with jizz. Yeah. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. So, Blake, what would it be? It's your turn to talk. A jizz-addled alpha.

a bitch with supreme skills with a machete. That's easy, baby. Yeah, flows like water. Be like water. Hot, hot, hot, hot. Damn. Gcundo. Give me back my son.

Ooh, nice. That's new. That was the catacom. That's what I say after every one of my kids' soccer practices, I look at the coach and I go, and I go. Give me back my son. Yeah. Do you understand? He's mine.

Damn. Remember what that was from? Of course. Trailer moment. Ransom. Come on. Come on. The long loading times. The glitchy video calls. That's your house asking for better internet. Switch to Bell Pure Fiber, Canada's most reliable internet awarded by Open Signal from $75 a month. Price guaranteed for two years on a two-year term and auto pay credit. Visit bell.ca for more details and to check availability. Bell, connection is everything. Hi, this is Kylie Breakman.

Angel Geratana. Jeremy Colhane. Patrick McDonald. And we're the hosts of the Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists Podcast. The Improvised Character Comedy Podcast where each week a new panel of artists discuss their craft. Join us for a panel of wellness influencers. What I try to do is faux journal. I don't know.

Have you guys heard of faux journaling? Yeah, it's reading. It's called reading. So we don't like to use that word anymore. A panel of New Yorker cartoonists. Have you guys done? Terry Gross's Peloton class. No!

I've been dying, too. I'm so sorry. I'm seeing a reading of Sadako in the Thousand Paper Cranes by Audra McDonald's at the Wonderland Bookstore on 14th. That's crazy. I went to the Wonderland Bookstore yesterday and I heard Nora Jones do a reading of Zero Dark 30. No way.

You have to come to the last bookstore, though. Kim Cottrell is reading the guitar tabs of yesterday. A panel of Eurovision participants. And we do a little Halloween sometimes. Does the Pope dress up? He winks on Halloween. It's right up next to the microphone.

I hear you can almost hear the eyelashes hit each other. You never seen Italy so quiet as when the Pope gets up to wink on Halloween. Listen to artists on artists on artists on artists on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If your bookshelf and your for you page are equally important to your personality, welcome home. This is Prose Society. the weekly podcast that's part book club, part group chat for thought daughters, pop culture obsessives, and anyone who thinks Pride and Prejudice and Love Island deserve the same level of discourse. I'm Eli Rallo and every week we're connecting the dots between books, the internet, and the

conversations everyone can't stop having. I'm going to have to look up this story. I'm obsessed. So I'm obsessed. From bestselling authors and your favorite book talk creators to the latest pop culture moments, nothing is off the table. It's like if you can hide some real. messages inside compelling characters, and that is a Trojan horse.

Whether you're looking for literary deep dives, smart pop culture conversations, or a community of readers who love to think a little too much, you're in the right place. Listen to Pro Society on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. See you between the pages. Hey guys, it's Adam Devine, Blake Anderson, and Anders Holm from the podcast, this is important. Woo! Hey y'all, we're here to let you know that on Friday, September 25th at 8 p.m., we will be at the Fallsview Casino Resort in Niagara Falls, Ontario, Canada. You know it, you love it, that's right, we're bringing the chaos and Blake's soundboard across the border. So get your tickets now at T-I-I-Tor.com before they sell out.

I can't wait to party with you guys. Canadian style. Hey, it's Bobby Bones. Join me in former NFL quarterback Matt Castle every Wednesday on our podcast, lots to say with me Bobby Bones and Matt Castle. We also bring in friends, they're mostly Matt's friends, who are current or former NFL players, some of the biggest names in music and entertainment,

and then we have some really great conversations that can pretty much go anywhere. The great Pac-Man Jones. After the game, the whole national task force for police officers was at the stadium. Like, hey, buddy, you Adam. Come up. And one of my favorite segments we do is called situational awareness,

where Bobby and I give each other real-life situations and figure out what we'd actually do. You're in training camp, and the rookie quarterback has one good throwing session in front of the media. Suddenly, everybody online says he should start over you, week one. How do you handle this? You just go back out to practice the next day, and wait for him to mess up.

Listen to lots to say with Bobby Bones and Matt Castle on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. So should I be worried? My son is he's going to preschool. He, uh, he, went to his first day of preschool yesterday. Indctrinated.

Give me back my son! Oh, two days ago now. He's there again today. Yeah, you should be very worried. No, well, he goes, he comes home after the first day, and I said something. And he goes, oh, no, daddy, that's evil. Oh, shit. And I'm like, evil.

He hurt evil at school. Oh. And I think because it's a, it's a. Christian school. Like, it's a saint. Whoa. Yeah. That was going to be a kid's name.

That's evil. I'm talking about my friend evil. Say it. Yeah, we named him after evil can evil. Are they teaching him? We're like, good and evil already? I don't know. You're saying day one and he's already like passing judgment?

I'm like, that's a bold. Yeah, he was like, that's evil. When you say it's a Christian school, is it at a church? It's a preschool at a church. Or is it? Yeah. It's not at a basement, but it's a night, the night setup. I was in a church.

basement for one year. Well, of course you were. So was I. So was I for many years. What? You guys were, your churches had basements. That's so scary. That's like where bad things... It's just the Midwest. It's just the Midwest. It's just the Midwest. It's where all the making out happened. It's just the Midwest. It's not scary. Yeah. That's actually sick. Yeah. That's some Dahlmer shit, bro. Yeah, it is. He's from Wisconsin. Well, as a California and you don't understand basements. There's... I've gathered through talking to guys. And I'll go on record again. There's basements. And then below. low basements is where it's at.

Yeah, that's what Derser's really likes. The hidden doors underneath the basement. You can't hear screams. Somebody help me! It's like an escape room almost. He also told me the teacher was like, yeah, so a kid pushed Bo.

And he... Day one? Day one. Yeah, this is how it goes. You know, I get it. It's pretty school. Jumped in. And Bo goes, I don't like that. I'm like, oh, look at him go. Yeah, stand up for himself. And, but he didn't push back, which I was sort of proud. Right.

A little proud about. But I also was like, you know, if he comes at you, you come twice as hard. You know what you sent him back armed with? I wish you would. Like, that's... Oh, I wish you would. I'm going to teach him that. I'm going to teach him that.

He's at the age now that you can teach him little phrases. So I'm going to teach him, I wish you would. Say I won't is a strong one. Dude, wait. You recently watched a. my brother and me, did you see the episode where like he has a bully and he goes, hit me? Hit me.

I did not see that. I watched the first two. What is my brother and me? What is this? It was a 90s. I subscribed to a streaming service called The Brick, which is just basically black shows from yesteryear.

And then a couple little white shows sprinkled in. Okay. House guest, but that's got to sit bad. Sign me up. So anyway. Sign me up. Okay. They have my.

brother and me, which was a Nickelodeon show. Yeah. It was like Lagoo and Alfie. This one's not clocking. We just taught Bo clocking. It's not clocking to me. You got to run my brother and me back. It's a great show.

It's great. My kids were glued. And it's such a slice of 90s, like, slang. And, like, just the whole, like, wardrobe situation is on point. It's awesome. Okay. And no, I did not see that episode. It's really good.

The bully episode. Have all your kids watch it because it's good. It resumes. Gu is a comedy genius. Yeah, goo is, I hope he's still with us. But tell me about your son, Bo. Bo and Goo. Goos out there for sure.

No, he goes, he, they're like, yeah, so this kid pushed him and, you know, he handled it. It was squash right away. And we're like, okay, great. And then I come home and I go, Bo, did a kid push you today? And he goes, yeah, and I cried. And I'm like, oh, I'm sorry, buddy. You what? And he goes, I go, and I go, so is the, you know, the kid pushed you.

And he goes, yeah, all the kids pushed me. And I'm like, what? What? And he goes, and hit me. And I go, what? And I go, well, what about the teacher? And then he goes, what teacher? Right.

Dude, what the fuck out of preschool are we saying? She's evil. She's evil. And so it began. What teacher? She's evil. Meanwhile, nice is. nicest, like, little 24-year-old

Cover your ass. Cover your ass. Bo's telling a different story. What the hell? Everybody's just fucking dog piling in? But by the way, it was very excited to go again today. He's like, school. So I'm like, it couldn't have been that bad. Yeah, it's an adrenaline route.

Yeah. He can't. He's fighting for his life. Abuse is a tough cycle to get out of. Dude, but his comic delivery of what teacher was so perfect. He was like, what teacher? Yeah.

And then he said, you want to call it? that a teacher? You'll call that a teacher? This here and that there? A teacher? That ain't a teacher. She ain't teaching me shit. Give me back my... What other... Do you have any more Mel Gibson on there? Give me back my son!

Because I know that's your guy. You have like... Not at all. I mean, he's made good films, but he's a terrible human. Because like what is... I'm trying to remember who you have tattooed. Like Paul Walter Hauser has all those comedians tattooed. And I think on your chest... Oh, dude.

It's Mel Gibson. Right. Harvey Weinstein. Harvey Weinstein. It just says Mel, Harvey. I'm trying to remember who else was evil. Who else? Who else? Hulk Hogan. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Hogan. But you got the Hogan tattoo like right after that racist video. Yeah. The racist pornographic video came out. That's when it really solidified your... God, that absolutely... By the way, that was absolutely crazy. Yeah.

To see my hero fucking just become a fucking total doucheback. Well, watch the documentary. He, the poor guy has a dark turn. And when he, he cheated on his wife. And then they got the divorce. And then his wife, my God, she would drive, she would take his boat. The thunder, night thunder or whatever. Yeah, the like, the thunder or whatever it was called.

Oh, yeah, because he's a Tampa Resi. Yes. And would drive it past his, like, full speed and just rev it down in the marina below so he would look out and see his wife making out with a 19 year old guy that looks very similar to Hulk Hogan. I'm like that is just going to that is what turned him into a true villain right there. That's where he's like, I'm going full maga. You know what's funny?

Like you think that's going to crush you. But if you truly look at it from like a bird's eye view. You can imagine it too. That is a broken woman. You could just go, wow. This woman is out of her mind. She lost it. So you're good.

I'm sure. I mean, we all watched Hogan knows best. They were all feeding into the crazy. Never missed an episode if that's what those were. Yeah. They were a unique family for sure. Oh, this was the reality show. Yeah.

You never watched Hogan knows best? I think I did. I feel like I only watched maybe three or four. Brooke Hogan had it. Yeah. I was like, there's no way she's not going to be

a giant pop star. Yes, Brooke. Come on. Go off, Queen. Yeah. I feel like you and Kyle were a little more into Hogan knows best

than I was. We were deep, bro. That's why it was like absolutely shattering for me for Hogan to turn out to be a fucking kind of a scumb bag. It really,

it really cut my legs out. Yeah, you didn't see that coming at all. No, man. I was ignorant to the bag. Interesting. I thought his heel turn was just in the ring. Right. Too bad.

No. It's too bad. And have we seen better facial hair on a person? And I mean, no. Like he had a black beard, but the mustache down like this stayed gold and blonde, right? Oh, yeah. Is that what it was? Yeah, it was blonde over the, like, spray painted black beard and then a skullet on top.

Is there a better representation of facial hair? Like a more recognizable any buddy? doing it better. I mean, there's more recognizable, but... Don't say Hitler. Weird, Hitler mustache. No, he was going to say that. I would have said when Michael Jordan did the Hitler mustache. That's what I would have said. Yeah, but he did it up top and bottom. Right. Oh, Jordan did? Yeah. The iconic, the iconic facial hairs are like, no, I don't think so because I'm like, I just keep going to Sam Elliott,

but he just kind of has a, like, a really nice mustache. Yeah, a push broom, sure. Tom Selleck had a killer stash. Selic. Selic. It does go, it does go Selic. But like, unreal facial hair. Yeah. I would say my favorite facial hair is Andrus Holm.

I'll say it. Oh, yeah. Bring it back. At what stage? I thought your mustache, when it's full frontal and it's, it is so dusty looking. It ages you so dramatically. 69, dude. And I like looking over at you and being like, he is the oldest person I know.

I just like that feeling. I like... Is that why you would help me up? Yeah, I was always helping you well. I had a mustache and Adam was like, we're going to leave here. Let me... I'd be like, what? I would pull out your chair.

I'd open a door for you. Yeah. He would help you walk across the street. Yeah, and then I would say, hey, do we have a table next to the bathroom? He has to get up and use the restroom quite a bit. Yeah. Is there a table near? And every time I said, I just finished a workout, you'd always say, good for you.

Still doing it. Good for you. Oh, good for you. Good for you, man. Good for you. How many steps you? you get in today? Unbelievable.

How many steps? I can't wait. Four thousand. I can't wait to just start shuffling. Oh, man. Oh, dude, my dad's a bit of a shuffler now. I'm like, dude, pick, pick them feet up. We're not, we can't be there.

Come on. We can't be there. Hop, hop. Let's go. Let's goop. Come on. Because when he thinks about it, he won't do it. He won't shuffle.

Right. Just left to his own devices. He's, every damn shuffling. Cumbaya. Okay, you know what? Get that shirt made, dude. Yes, points! That's kind of tight.

I get it, though. Now that I have all my Achilles tendonitis and these heel spurs, sometimes a good old shuffle feels good, man. You know what? It feels good in the house. Out of the house, it doesn't feel good. It doesn't feel good out of the house. But in the house, when you're just shuffling from the kitchen,

she's shuffling it with a little snack to get to the couch, shuffle, shuffle. Yeah. How do you guys feel going down? stairs in the morning. Oh, God, man. I feel pretty confident on the stairs in the morning. Oh, it's not good.

You using the railing? Oh, yeah, without a doubt. I don't think I've, it's been a decade since I've walked up and down stairs without actively holding on. That dump trunk. Yeah, the gravity, the pull, the pull. Bro, he got to lift that ass down some stairs, bro. He's holding the rail.

Yeah, that's true. That's true. Not wrong. Oh, yeah, no, the stairs in the. morning are the test of how the whole day's going to go for me. God damn. My feet, my legs are like fine, but my feet are like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, oh, whoa. What would cause you to really run down the stairs like it's Christmas? Yeah, what makes you do a, what makes you a brisk? Like if I, yeah, what gives you bounce in your step in the morning? Um, over sleeping? Like if my kids are

about to go to school and I got to go take them. Oh, yeah. I've slept, I've like overslept. I've like overslept or whatever and I know I can hear them like rummaging downstairs. Your wife lets you do that? That's sick, dude. You lucky duck. Dang. That's really nice. Well, what I told you, when we get in bed, first of all, I'm in bed when she's in bed, as opposed to like 10 years ago, I would just be watching TV to one in the morning. Yeah. You just started waiting in bed naked. So now I'm in bed. She falls asleep right away. I need another hour to wind down, probably.

Mm-hmm. And... So what do you do in this bed? bed for an hour. I'm on iPad. Okay, dokey. So you're up on the iPad? Yeah, for like a half hour. And then I, this is the ultimate upgrade. This is how I know I've made it, gentlemen. Okay. I am YouTube premium or whatever. So like I pay for YouTube, which means not only do you have no commercials. Let's be nice. But if you close your iPad, it still plays.

Why is that cool? Netflix doesn't even have commercials, though. Yeah, go ahead. So that I can like turn on, I can stack up like four videos that I'm just like, listening to close it, put it on the side of the bed, and just go to sleep with one air pod in, and then I'll pass out. That's lunacy. That's crazy. You fall asleep to YouTube videos? Yeah. Oh, AI's going to fucking kill you first. Oh, you're done. Who said that? Yeah, you're done. AI's killing you first, dude. You're done, bro. It's too, it knows too much about you, yes. No, no, no. You're getting programmed at night. It knows when you're asleep and it switches to a different video that is my...

It knows when you are sleeping. Here's what's crazy. It's almost always videos I've already watched or seen or listened to. Yeah, isn't it crazy when you kind of thumb through the internet when you're looking at your feed? I feel like every third video I've seen before.

Is it just shown me again because it knows I like it or are we running out of hot content? Yeah, we got to be out. I don't think anyone's making anything anymore. Not they're not making any of the good shit. No, it's getting slim. It's slim picking. That's true.

The good shit was from like 24. 2024 was the year. Yeah. Remember that was really good shit? We sound like sophomores in high school now. That was the jump off, dude. Seventh grade was hitters. Okay, dokey.

Who were the two bros that, uh, I don't even know their names. The one guy had a beard and the other guy wears glasses. The Nystatte brothers? No, it's like Leonard. A good mythical morning? Yes, those are the bros. Yeah. They were making some killer content.

Are we talking about Link, Link and Rhett? Yes. Yes, my boys, bro. Can we talk about this for one moment? My boy. Their looks are so dialed in. That's what I'm talking about. They've been doing it for a long.

We don't even like, I mean, look, what are we doing? Dude. That had a seen better days. I didn't even, I just, like, rolled out. I didn't think I was, I had any juice to this. I go, put on fun sunglasses. Yeah, I'm glad. That inspired me to put on my sunglasses.

Yeah. Good, good. But, dude, they have. such haircuts? Blake's wearing pretend to make-believe glasses so he could look cool. You know how like people

have like a look like Carl Lagerfeld always wore like the black stuff with like the people just have like a specific outfit they never change out of. When do we do that? Because Rink and Lett have done it. Is that their names? Rinkled and Lain.

Scaffled him? Yeah. I think we're right. I think we're right. He's got like. Link and red. He has, like, rich dude glasses and, like, crazy perfect area. And the other guy goes the other direction with, like, the beard has had a ponytail. But the beard is, like, oiled. It's maintained.

It's maintained. It's maintained. I think they are infinitely more rich than we are. Oh, yeah. They surpassed. I know, but you guys don't remember this. We did a panel with them. Or maybe I did it.

Maybe it was just me. I don't remember doing it. Okay. I did a panel with them because. Where were you? This woman who worked at a production company that I worked with hit me up after workaholics. And she's like, I work at Google now

and I'm having content creators on and you made the launch from YouTube to TV. So you can talk about that. And I sat down and Linkin' Rett were there too and some other woman and some other guy, like the shoes guy maybe, I don't fucking know. Shoes. But the Rinkin' Let dudes, Lincoln Rett,

they start going into analytics. and like the businessness of all their stuff. And like, well, we like to, we saw this market, we made videos, we realized that they needed to be this and that long. And we know that the the thumbnails very important. So we started using reds and greens. And if you use blues or oranges, you're never going to get a watch. And I was like, and then she was like, what did you guys do?

I go, nothing. We are. Nothing. Yeah, we couldn't even be bothered to respond to emails. I'll tell you what we did. emailed us. We made videos we liked.

Yeah. About Bing. Yep. That's what we did. About Bang. We were like, what else? What else? That's it?

Bangbuss? You know what? We're so fortunate. We're so fortunate that someone found us. And then we were able to get a show. Crazy. Because now

you have to be good at the business. Oh, yeah. Yeah. There's way less opportunities to actually have a television show if you're not a known person. But you know what? No one wants a TV show. It's so much work that I'm like, as I try and put together like a show and I'm like,

oh, who would I cast here? I go, that person's super funny. And I'm like, but the famous story is Kat Williams. They wanted him to be the Aziz character on Parks and Rec. Whoa. They wrote it for him. AI that. Wow.

And they told Kat how much he was going to be. making and how much he was going to be working. And he was like, no, thank you. I'm good. Yeah, like, you're telling me I'm going to work six months and get paid X when I can make that in six hours on the road. He was absolutely crushing on the road. Yeah.

So now it's like almost, not almost everybody, but so many people have a following that you find on Instagram or wherever that they're like, I'm already making X. I can go do stand-up, just doing these characters, and get paid X there. Why would I work for 12 hours on a set? I didn't even grow up watching TV. Yeah, I remember talking with Theo Vaughn, and he was like, he had just got done shooting his movie Bus Boys with Spade, and I was like, ah, how do you like it, dude? And he was like, how do you like it?

And I'm like, I love Beat on set. Like, Beat on set is my, I love it. It's my favorite thing. Adam has LeBron James handshakes with everybody on the crew. Yeah. I come alive. Calls everybody baked dog. He's at the catering table.

But no, I do. I really enjoy, like, everyone working together to make a thing. It's the sense of community. I really enjoy it. Yeah, you become a little family. It's dope. And he was like, oh, I hated it. He was like, it was so much work.

I hated it. It's a lot. what people get really upset about all the like waiting around too it's just like Sebastian Manuscalco on our I don't know what's it called about my father yeah I was like are you ever going to do this again because like we're just sitting there like twiddling our thumbs on our phone he was like uh you know yeah it's a lot it's a lot and I go yeah and then he's like on the weekends flying to stadiums to do and I was and then he'd come back and I'm like and he's like I made what I made this weekend yeah on this movie

be crazy. Yeah. Yeah. I get it. Well, boys, are there any tapebacks, any apologies, any epic slams? I don't know. I feel like we really stood on

business today. Yeah, I was going to say that. Well, I would actually like to apologize to AI. Because it's listening. Okay. It's listening. Say it. And I just want you to know, I think you guys are one of the good ones.

And I don't think you're going to do anything bad to humanity. And I just, I'm going to have to trust that and believe that because I am not the guy to fix it. Okay? Right now, Adam is being the people who have Jewish people in the basement and the Nazis show up and he's like, I don't know where they are. I'm not being. And even if I did, and I wouldn't tell you. I don't know if that's an exact. They're in the walls.

I don't think that's exactly what I'm doing. They're definitely not behind that painting. There's not a door behind that painting. this is not a loose floorboard. I don't think that's what I'm doing exactly. You guys hungry? But yes, AI, AI, you guys rock. Keep doing what you're doing.

Unless it involves... You guys look like you could use some schnitzel. Have a seat. Unless it involves and inhumanity. In which case, please don't do that. You're against it. I am against it. Goodbye.

I think it's going to happen. You know, you might not be wrong. It sucks we have young kids because then they're going to have to... And then, like, imagine... What are they going to do? The end of the world. And then you've got to, like, figure out of it. out what snacks they want.

Oh, God. And it's the end of the world. And you're like, dude, we don't have that snack. It's the end of the world. Yeah. There's no snacks, dude. We're done with snacks. The snack time is over, buddy. You want a snack? One just ran right by you. Yeah. We'll have a step on that. Let's eat it. Here's a machete. Go on and get it, dude.

That's machete that he's really good with. Go on get it. We have an announcement here. Blake, read it. Where? Where? Where? Where? In the chat, read it. I still don't know how to work the chat.

I can open the chat. That's pretty easy. This is important podcast at OLG Stage at Fallsview Casino Friday, September 25th. 2026, 8 p.m. That's Niagara Falls, Ontario. I know we're going to see you there. These daddies haven't been out on the stage in a while and we're ready to come rock with you. That's only in a couple weeks.

That's coming up, dude. I didn't even know. It was like that. If you're sitting around waiting to get your tickets, now is the time. Swoop them. Because we're coming. We're coming. What?

Literally we're literally going. We're going there. I'm going to come. I don't think we're coming. And I'm hoping we get to have a little moment together where we go check out the falls together. Sounds kind of cool. I hope we get to do a lot of fun stuff. It's also a casino.

So I like, uh, I like, uh, I like we. None of us are gamblers, and then we'll take like $200 and then lose that pretty quickly, and then be like, what do we do now? So I'm hoping. You know the ultimate gamble? Going over the falls in a barrel. Oh. Hey-oh.

Fuck it. But I might be a big gambler at the Fallsview Casino. It seems like a great place to be a big gambler. To spend money. You know it would be really good. If you guys both got into two, like, giant die, like dice. Okay. And then that went over as a big promotion.

Okay. And then I dress up like the... Oh, for Falls View Casino, Friday, September 25th. I dress up like the guy who's like rolling the dice. You guys go over. Okay. Yeah. I feel like that could be great.

I probably sell some... I honestly don't hate that plan. Yeah. And it's... So Niagara Falls, Ontario... You don't always wanted to go to Niagara Falls and here we are. Me too. I can't believe it.

I can't believe this is our job. Look at the podcast is taking us places. where we've always wanted to go. Niagara Falls. Let's take an engagement photo. Dude, imagine the merch we're going to buy. Oh, baby. Oh, yeah.

We get matching Hawaiian Niagara Falls T-shirts. Is that? Or shirts. Do they do that? They have to. Or maybe hockey jersey. And my got of automatic takeback right here. I'm sorry, I even question that.

I have to. Come on. All right, that was another episode of... This is... important That shit's important Hi, this is Kylie Breakman

Angel Geratana Jeremy Colhain, Patrick McDonald And we're the hosts of the Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists Podcast The Improvised Character Comedy Podcast Where each week a new panel of artists discuss their craft Join us for a panel of Eurovision participants

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