This Is Important - Ep 47: The Guys First G-Rated Episode ... Attempt

Episode Date: July 27, 2021

Today, this is what's important:Tasteful jokes, farts, avocado toast, fondue, fajitas, water sports, Bret Hart, the Duke lacrosse team, Bachelor party bets, playing to the camera, how to torture your siblings, and more. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hi, I'm David Eagleman. I have a new podcast called Inner Cosmos on iHeart. I'm going to explore the relationship between our brains and our experiences by tackling unusual questions like, can we create new senses for humans? So join me weekly to uncover how your brain steers your behavior, your perception, and your reality. Listen to Inner Cosmos with David Eagleman on the iHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Last season, millions tuned into the Betrayal podcast to hear a shocking story of deception. I'm Andrea Gunning, and now we're sharing an all-new story of betrayal. Ashley Lytton was helping her husband set up a business Venmo account when she discovered

a terrible secret. I saw it in a folder, and I opened it. What the hell did I just see? Listen to season two of Betrayal on the iHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Between April 1971 and September 1972, six young black girls were snatched off the streets in Washington, D.C. This child was laying on the side of the road. The person said, I murdered your daughter. The killer believed that he may have been seen. I will admit the others when you catch me if you can. Signed Freeway Phantom. Listen to Freeway Phantom on the iHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome to This Is Important, a production of iHeart Radio, the show where we only talk about

what is most obviously very crucially important. Today on This Is Important, 40-year-old men winking their buttholes. Hipster with the toast. I want to suck the undertaker's dick. Let's go. Coming in half hour, just having a little laugh-off pod. These are real laughs. Oh gosh, we're friends. We are buddies. We're pals. We still enjoy each other's company. You guys are so funny. You guys are funny, you know. A lot of great. Let's just say I'm opening the water about this one. There we go.

Liquid adepth. This dude's treating himself to some liquid death. Sparkle style. Pod sponsor. He's got the black can. Yeah, baby. Hell yeah. Bubbles in my tub. What was that laugh all about, huh? What the hell was that? Just a little joke off pod. Off pod joke? We brought it on to pod. It leaked onto the pod. Hey, I'm not going to tell what it's about though. I'll tell you that. I'll tell you, it feels good to just yuck with my buddies as well. I'll tell you. Phyllis, that one's for us, okay? We're going to keep that one private. Secrets do make friends. We might have to do a release that on Patreon or some sort of

my fans only. My only fans. To find out what the guys were chuckling about right before the show started. Still chuckling. Hey, $10. Follow us on Pams Only. Oh, that's a good idea. Do we start a Patreon and then release our tasteful nudes? Yeah. Okay. Wait, you're back to the nudes? I thought we were talking about releasing tasteful jokes that we're laughing at. Yeah, but I'm saying if we're really trying to make some money off Patreon. Well, and also if we want to be just free to really say what we want, we can do it on Patreon.

I feel so restricted. We should do the opposite on Patreon. Go only tasteful jokes all. It's a G-rated version of the pod. Yep. We really clean up. Well, I did say right off the pod, right before we jumped on. We weren't laughing at this part though. Well, this is not what we're laughing at. Right. This is a serious charge for that. That we should clean our act up, guys, because the last three or so episodes have been real

come heavy. Yeah. We've been talking a lot about come. Well, sure. Yeah. Yeah. Mung heavy. And munging, which is real gross. I think I crossed a professional line when we were talking about munging. I don't know that I want to go there anymore. Hey. Oops. Winning. You filmed my actual asshole. So right. It's not a personal.

Well, yeah, that was blurring the boundaries between personal and professional. Like personal, I'll talk about munging with you all day. Professionally, I don't want to bring it up again. Okay. Okay. Then we won't. Guess what? We didn't bring it up. Yeah. You're the one who did. You currently are the one who just brought it up. Yeah. What the fuck, dude?

Oh boy. Just being clear. Dude, and that's living on this podcast. We'll get you. You brought it up, bastard. Dang. You got me. Dang. Should we stop swearing? Dang it, guys. No more swearing. Try it. All right. Try it?

Yeah. Try it. We'll have a swear jar. Hey, Will Smith doesn't swear on his records. Well, Tim. All right, dude. So fuck him and fuck you, too. He had him cursed. Eminem did. I was quoting Eminem. Do you guys want to start with a G-rated subject that I need your guys help with? Yeah. Yeah.

It's a real hot button topic. It's very important. Is it charged or what are we thinking here? Is G for fucking ginormous cum load? Oh, no. Dude, I need your guys help because today I went out for breakfast. Is it for gargling balls? All right. What is it? I went out with you guys, though. It's always that with you guys.

Anywho. I had a late call today, so I ended up going out for a little. It's a call time. It's a call time. It's a call time. So I got to have a nice little sit down breakfast. I ordered myself avocado toast, which I'm a huge fan of. Hipster. There you are. You're a young millennial girl.

Yeah. Yes. Hipster. Hipster with the toast. I've got some avocado toast stuff I'd like to talk about as well, but basically what threw me for a loop is so the waiter asked me, how would you like your eggs? Okay. The waiter asked me how it, and I panicked, fellas,

because I only know one way to cook an egg. What? Did you say scrambled? I said scrambled. On your avocado toast? I need help, guys. How do you remember egg styles? Don't you just say over easy? I don't know any other style except scrambled. Over easy.

Is there yulk on your face? Well, first of all, I will say that Blake is the hands down the worst orderer. When it comes to ordering food. Great observation. You will always choose something, either he'll just copy you, whatever you did. He's like, okay, yeah, if that's good, I'll do that. And you're like, well, okay, there's a whole menu. Or he'll choose something.

He's like, you know what I'm thinking? The corned beef and hash or something that you're like, what? That's a great. Yeah. How's your shrimp po-boy at this Mexican restaurant? Yeah, that's what it'll be. It'll be like, you know what, maybe it is 94 degrees, maybe a hot bowl of chili. And you're like, yeah.

And then always without fail, it comes to the table and he says, I biffed it. Yeah. It's like, dude, stop biffing your order. Or he won't order. He'll be like, no, I'm actually not hungry. I ate something. And then he'll be like, are you going to finish that sandwich? And you'll go, no, and he'll just house it.

I'm resourceful, bitch. I'm the vulture of the crew, dude. That's true. That is true. Clean up crew. You're a snack vampire. I apologize for early apology for eating any food of yours that you guys didn't want. But if you were going to throw it away, me eating it is kind to the environment.

Yeah. Also, Blake, just take a moment and visualize it. You've got avocado toast coming and you're putting scrambled fucking eggs on the toast. What are you supposed to put on it? I've never ordered it and I never will. I would put it over easy. It's a poached egg that is the standard. That's a good idea too.

I love it. That sounds great. Well, I'm anti-poaching. So I'm pro. I'm pro-poaching. No points. But what are the other ways that eggs are prepared other than hardboiled? I know that one.

That's like, okay, first you came out the gate with hardboiled. I think that is it boiled. I know two ways. We've already said a couple. We've said over easy. It's over easy. It's over medium. It's hardboiled.

Over hard, sunny side up. What does that mean? Okay. What does over medium mean? That sounds like a steak, dude. That's consistency of the yolk. Now, over medium is just the consistency of the yolk. On your fucking face, dog.

Without an L. You're yelling about something that it makes you sound dumber when you get riled up. It's like, oh, you're telling me the sun comes up tomorrow too? Even though it just came up. It just came up. It's going to come up tomorrow. I know hardboiled, dog. Okay.

When I get back to the corner, I yell and I realize that I back myself into this corner. But still, I'm fighting my way out, dude. Hey, you should just stick to talking about cum, okay? That's the one thing you know. What's the type of eggs where it's kind of like coming in the middle? See? Here we go. There we go.

And here we are. Over sleazy. That's the one that's like cooked. I like it. They open it in hot ass water. That's poached, right? Where it's like you drop it in the water and then the water cooks it together and it looks like cum baking. Okay.

I'm so excited. Yeah, yeah. I'm in with you, Blake. I'm there with you, Blake. I like it. I'm sick of being like, you know, kid-friendly. Hazy, you've had your tipping point. Okay.

You know who I would like to give flowers to? Mung mung mung mung. Is our editor, his mungy, is whoever came up with mungy. Whoever came up with it. Unbelievable. No, is our editor, Todd, who in the last episode, we talked about Kyle's farts and we made him do a lot of crafty edit work. Yes. Oh, yes.

That was very good. Bringing the farts back and I, and we only have two on file right now, but right now, if Todd could bring both farts back just right now, just so we could hear them again. Yeah, is that possible? And we're back. And we're back. Yeah, hopefully I can add to it. No!

Oh, man. I hope I can add to it today. Oh, man. I'm sure you will. Hey, for you guys at home, Kyle just really ponied up on the screen there and he's back. I hope I can make you guys proud with my fart sounds. Oh, gosh.

Now he's performing for the clips. You are silence of the lambs. I like that Kyle's like, I just crossed a professional line in the sand. Yeah, you're the guy who farted on here. We talked about mungy and as a professional, I don't want to walk down that road ever again. We crossed the line while he's taking his microphone, shoving it up his ass. And then what the fans pointed out is that Kyle immediately took the mic from his ass after he farted and went right back to his mouth.

Well, that shit doesn't bother me. That doesn't bother me at all. I'm here sitting in it. Might as well get the whiff of the purest form. Unreal. Wait, might as well? Look, we've all... We've all definitely like whiffed.

Well, you know a fart smells different straight out though. I know. We've all whiffed our own farts, but you just said might as well. Well, it's a better smell. What do you mean? Oh, it's guys. It's a better smell. I have never done it and been like, well, I might as well get it fresh.

I've been like, man, am I going to shit my pants on me? Get a little... That's bad. That's bad. Guys, can I pivot back to avocado toast? I just want to make a point here. There's a real sliding scale for avocado toast when you order it. Okay?

Hipster shit. Okay. For those of you not aware, avocado toast. Signal me when you're not talking about it anymore. I just want a G-level show, man. That's all. That's all I want today. Well, let's talk about more things that everyone else knows about.

Blake finds utterly confusing. Yeah. What else? What else you got on the dock there, bud? Yeah, what's spinning around up there, buddy? Hey, how about this? You guys know... You know when you tie your shoe and then sometimes it's like on an angle?

Sure. Sure. Isn't that crazy? It's crazy. It's like the knot is on the side for some reason. What happened? Did I tie it further down the string? It's got the knot has taco neck?

Yeah, it's crazy to me. It's crazy. Wait, describe this in a little bit more detail for me up here. I'm not seeing this. It's when you tie your shoelaces semi-correctly. So the laces don't lay across. They kind of lay on an angle on a slant. This is just somebody...

Something everybody knows about. Oh. Yeah, I kind of got it. I think I kind of got it. That's good. That's worth exploring. Shut the fuck up! Look, I was just upset because usually avocado toast is like around $14.

And you never know what you're going to get. You could get a prepackaged like kind of a guacamole on top. Sometimes you get freshly sliced avocado with tomato. It's just... It really frustrates me, guys. What can I say? Hot button topic. Yo, is it as expensive here in California where they're readily available?

Or is it like super expensive in Brooklyn and... Well, at California, just everything's more expensive there in Southern California. So, sorry. Even avocados that are grown here as opposed to shipped to Atlanta? Well, avocado toast is wildly, wildly overpriced. It's a great snack at your house, but a horrible deal at a restaurant. I agree. I agree.

So I don't know what you're doing ordering that and you should stop. My bad. Well, no, that's fine. Just, you know, he's spending his money in ways that make him happy. So... Yeah, he's rich. Hey, sorry, guys. I air-balled another fucking order at a restaurant.

My bad. Yeah, what else do you do? Okay, like what do you want me to get? Eggs Benedict or something? Yeah, sure. It's delicious. Can we talk about Adam? If you guys at home would be surprised, Adam likes to order fajitas.

Oh, I love fajitas. At Mexican restaurants. We're like, it's a whole thing. Like the person... Wait a minute. Wait a minute. You're not about to try to go at my boy for fajita orders because that's a dope move. Well, yeah.

They're not good. What? They're delicious. It's the best. It's the best. Compared to other things on the menu. Shut the fuck up. I disagree because I don't like cheese.

I don't like cheese. And most other things are covered in cheese. So I don't really fuck with cheese that hard. You can't order something and say no cheese. Yeah, but I just like fajitas. Fajitas are dry. That's a bad take. Thank you, Anders.

It's not a bad take. No, I'm with hers. Oh, that's a terrible... What? You don't like fajitas? They're dry. I think they're bullshit. Yeah. I think they're bullshit.

Hold up, bitch. How often are you ordering fajitas? Well, Kyle is a contrarian. He doesn't like anything. No, no. I have a specific reason why I don't like fajitas. Okay. Then give it to us.

Let's hear it. Because you have to fucking make your own shit at the table, dog. Thank you. Thank you. That's fun. Oh, my God. I don't go to a fucking restaurant to get the fixings put in front of me and I have to make my own meal, player. Fucking thing sucks.

You're not that guy, pal. You're not that guy. Sorry to get so charged. Sorry. That's fun to me and that's exciting. I never worked at a restaurant. Maybe you... I don't think you worked at a restaurant either from what I remember, but...

What does that have anything to do with you? I love it. I never worked at a restaurant, so it's like a fun thing. It's like a novelty. Oh, so it's your clocking in, for sure. Yeah, it's like, okay, all right, give me a little hug. Yeah, good. You're paying.

You're paying to work. Okay, cool. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. It's fun. It's your passion. Fajitas are your passion. That's also why I like Korean barbecue.

Yeah. I like putting the meat on the grill myself. I like flipping it over, like doing the whole thing. It's a fun event. What's the shit where you put it in the hot oil? Fondue. That's the only thing I'm fucking working for, dog. Fondue.

Okay, relax. Why? Why does fondue get to skip the line in your fucking little... Because that's fun. That's fun. You're dipping it in hot oil. That is fun. It's fondue.

No, it's foam. That is fun. Fondue is dipping it in cheese and chocolate. You're not dipping it in hot oil. No, there are versions of fondue where you actually cook your meat. Did you say chocolate? Fondue is cheese. It's also chocolate.

There's chocolate fondue. You guys need to... Okay, yeah, right, okay. It's the melting of something. Is that what saying fondue is? I think so. Fondue is dipping it into oil or chocolate or cheese, I think. I don't know about oil.

I've never heard of it. You guys ever had... Dipping it in oil. So you're essentially just frying your own chicken? They give you boiling hot oil that you just... Correct. Yeah. You ever had a fondue set?

Your parents never had a fondue set growing up? No, dude. My parents weren't rich. Sorry, rub it in, dude. That's not what fondue is. What do you mean? What's fondue then? What's fondue?

Fondue is like a melted... Like, it's melted cheese or melted chocolate. And then you dip the thing in. What do you... You're talking about frying food. But it's also considered fondue. I used to have fondue for my birthday every year, and there's several versions of fondue.

One is like you cook your meat in a fondue pot. There's also... And this is why I fond don't. Blake, how old were you when you were doing fondue every year for your birthday? Because I've known you for damn near 20 years at this point. Damn near 20 years. Yeah, it was in my youth.

It wasn't like an old... I found out that cooking my food instead of just eating it and having it delivered to me, I do prefer. Here's a boiling hot oil thing for your 12th birthday song. But here's the other thing that's making me mad about Kyle. It's like fondue is the worst version of that. Fondue is the worst tasting of fajitas and Korean barbecue. Those are far enough.

Yeah, so far they all suck. Okay, come at me, motherfucker. Korean barbecue is out of this world delicious. Fajitas are insanely good. Fondue is kind of meh. You must have a wet ass mouth is what's happening. I think I do. I think I personally, I think I do have a really juicy wet mouth.

Yeah. Oh, nice. Yes, sir. That's tight. That's why a lot of people call me the same Prenard of comedy because it's just oozing. I'm a real slobber dog. I let it fly.

So maybe that's it. Maybe it is dry and I'm able to give the saturation that it needs. Right, bro, maybe. You just pack fucking tortillas in the back of your mouth to just absorb your saliva. I love it. That's Adam's version of a burrito bowl. He just lines his mouth with tortillas and eats meat.

Hi, I'm David Eagleman. I have a new podcast called Inner Cosmos on iHeart. I'm a neuroscientist and an author at Stanford University and I've spent my career exploring the three pound universe in our heads. On my new podcast, I'm going to explore the relationship between our brains and our experiences by tackling unusual questions so we can better understand our lives and our realities. Like, does time really run in slow motion when you're in a car accident?

Or, can we create new senses for humans? Or, what does dreaming have to do with the rotation of the planet? So join me weekly to uncover how your brain steers your behavior, your perception, and your reality. Listen to Inner Cosmos with David Eagleman on the iHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Last season, millions tuned into the Betrayal podcast to hear a shocking story of deception.

I'm Andrea Gunning, and now we're sharing an all-new story of Betrayal. Ashley Lytton was helping her husband set up a business Venmo account when she discovered a terrible secret. I scrolled down and that's when I saw a hidden folder and I opened it. What the hell did I just see? I was scared that he was coming home. What Ashley discovered that day was a secret so dark, she feared for her life. She was like, oh my god, I gotta get out of the house.

He's gonna find out that I've seen this, he's gonna come kill me. Listen to Season 2 of Betrayal on the iHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Between April 1971 and September 1972, six young black girls were snatched off the streets in Washington, DC. It took four murders before the police finally realized that one person was responsible. I will admit the others when you catch me, if you can.

Signed Freeway Phantom. This child was laying on the side of the road. It appeared that she was probably either dragged out of the car or thrown out of the car. The person said, I murdered your daughter. The killer believed that he may have been seen by the mother. That guy is, he's out of sync with even the worst people. I thought that they would catch him, I thought it was just a matter of time. Is it possible that the killer is still alive?

Listen to Freeway Phantom on the iHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Yo, you guys used to double wrap your Chipotle burrito, right? Remember that like life hack where you'd be like two tortillas, please? Why would you want that? So it wouldn't break, I think. That's how I did it, structurally. I mean, it would be protection for sure,

but you would just double up to get twice the carbs up in there, did? I just, hey, to be honest, back in my college days, I would eat two Chipotle burritos like a fucking madman, dude. That's next level. I feel like I've always been just beating back obesity, so it's right there. Like it's on your porch and you're like, get out of here. I can't stop eating.

Yeah, totally. I'm like, shoo, shoo, fly. I think I'm currently obese, so. I eat because I'm unhappy. You might be, yeah, you could be. And that's okay. What did you say? I'm obese.

Yeah, you're morbidly obese. Not morbid. I'm just obese, just chill. I don't think it's morbid. I don't like it. I think it's morbid to me. All right. I'll work on it.

I'm excited to see that belly hang at Lake of the Ozarks here in a few weeks. Oh, I'm wearing a t-shirt. You will not see me without a shirt on. No, dude. No, no, no, no. You are not going to wear a t-shirt. You're going to wear a t-shirt that looks like a muscle, dude. Oh, that's really funny.

Well, that's funny. That's cool. That's the only way out. If you're not wearing that, I'm stripping that shit off you. I'm bringing scissors. Hit the road. That's cool. I know.

I'm like, are we getting a wakeboard? I was thinking about that today. We aren't going to wakeboard. Is that the one on the knees that you were talking about? Oh, yeah, knee boarding? Oh, yeah, you want a knee board? No, you have to knee board. We've talked about this.

Yeah, I forgot. I forgot I was knee boarding champion already. That sounds so painful. I'm fucking copping you, dude. No shirt, only knee boarding. I'm going to wakeboard. But mostly what I want to do is we're going to have four jet skis available.

Oh, hell, yeah. Yeah. And they go 70 miles an hour. So here's the plan. Give me a hell, yeah. How many knots is that? Chicken. Let's play chicken.

All right. Yeah, chicken, dude. Yeah, bro. Just go ahead. And go head top. You're joking, but we could get there. We will have helmets and shit. We could get some helmets.

Didn't you remember when we filmed workaholics and we did that jousting on go karts thing? Yes. And the whole thing was like maybe Blake and I were pissed at each other. I can't remember. And we were jousting at each other on go karts from like just 50 feet apart, flooring it at each other.

But obviously we had stunt guys snap in and do it for like the real thing because we were supposed to collide. And after you do a stunt, when you're done, and they've kind of yell cut, like you put a thumb up to let them know you're all good, they yelled cut after these dudes collided and one dude thumb up, other dude no thumb up.

And they hit so hard. I think we're going to play that clip right now. Dude, loud. It's visual. And so you guys at home, you just saw that clip. The sound of them hitting, man. It's crazy. Oh, dude, like helmet to helmet.

It was bad. That was one of our gnarliest stunts for sure. It sticks out in my mind. So what I'm saying is we could recreate that on the water where there's a chance of drowning. Oh, okay. Yes. Do we do this?

Points. Points. Yes, points. Even more fun. Yes. Water points. So 70 miles an hour. Can you like, I've seen people take jet skis

and like catch some air off something and then dive them under the water. Have you ever seen people do this? Yeah, at the water world. Those are jet ski jet skis. You're talking about wave runners, right, Adam? Yeah, that's right. There's no standing up.

I mean, you can stand up on it, but it's not, it doesn't. These are not like water world at Universal Studios. It's not a Universal City stunt show. Bummer. Bummer. Okay, don't ride them. No, I just thought we could do something fun, like make water world or something.

I don't, maybe we could make water world. Maybe we could pretend like we're in water world. It will be fun. It will still be fun. You can only go 70 miles an hour on these things. It won't be any fun. So we're going to have four jet skis. We're going to have a ski boat for wakeboarding,

that kind of stuff. We're going to have a pontoon boat. Sorry, a tri-tune. There's an extra tune in there, guys. Whoa, tune up. Okay. And then there's a bass boat too, in case one of us gets an itchy butthole and wants to go fishing.

Is that what you need? Yeah, what's the... Yeah, a little hair up your ass. You know, you get a little tingle and you're like, you know what, I need to get out there squirrelly in the morning. Dennis will take you out. That would be sick. I probably will be hung over.

I won't want to get up at like 7 a.m. to go fishing. But because that's when they bite. I won't be hung over, but I can't guarantee that I'm going to want to get up at 7 a.m. Yeah, true. All right. I feel like that's the only way I have fished is hung over. Like after college, a buddy of mine

owns like a little fishing getaway camp thing, like this little island. Cool gig. In Canada. Yeah, it's fucking sick. And he was like, come on out to my family's fishing thing. And we went fishing. We just drank all night and then woke up at like 5 a.m.

And went fishing in the freezing cold in Canada. And it was cool. But I'm still going to send it. It was very trying. I was like, this is cold and sucks. Yeah. Well, I just went fishing multiple days with my dad this past week in the Ozarks.

And I did it both ways. I did it hung over and I did it not hung over. Well, it was better. And I will say not hung over was a more pleasant experience. OK. That makes sense. Right. It was so hot.

I was like, am I yack? Maybe I would feel better if I just yacked real quick. Right, right. Chum the water. Yeah. And that's what my dad says. He was like, you got to chum the water. And I'm like, what's that?

He's like, chum the water. And I'm like, I can't. I can't hear you dad burn. That shit's important. Yeah. Love it. Yeah, he's going to be a little, I know he's going to be like so pumped to see everyone.

And classic divine maneuver is you go way too hard night one and then you're kind of burnt out by the next night. That's going to be Dennis. But I know he's going to be frustrated because he can't, his voice is shot. And so he isn't going to be able to yell over us. And we all know that the only way in our friendship group, the only way to get any kind of attention

or to steer the conversation in any way is just to be the loudest motherfucker. Yeah, for sure. Yeah. Yeah, kind of like that. I might bring him a bullhorn. Is that cool? Yeah, that'd be tight.

That's a good call. Oh yeah, that could be really cool. Let's give Dennis D the bullhorn. That would be... Hey Siri, buy a bullhorn. Fuck you. We're before Dennis. I'll give you the address off the pod

and you can send it right there. There we go. I'm going to bring it on the plane. I'm going to bring it on the plane. Oh, they're going to love that. Let's send a ton of stuff to my parents' house in the Ozarks. That's a good idea. I'll send my hammock out there and maybe a tent or something.

I have a feeling it's going to come to that. So there we go. Oh yeah, I love that for you. I think we are going to be covered with sleeping arrangements. I think it's going to be okay, guys. Own room, own bathroom. What are we talking? Yeah, we have our own bathrooms.

Yeah, own bathroom. Each a house. Yeah, each room has its own... My parents live in an Oprah-sized mansion. Which wing do I get? All right, cool. Hey, guys, I watched something the other day that made me think of all of us,

but mostly Kylan Blake, who grew up in this milieu. Don't know what that means. I watched the A&E biography on Bret Hart. Oh, shit. Yeah, the Hart Foundation? Yeah. It was unfucking believable. Right.

What cool stuff did he do? I mean, you know Bret Hart the wrestler, correct, right? Bret Hart is a legendary Canadian professional wrestler, hit it big in the 90s. In the 90s. W-W-F. And he's part of a family, a renowned family. His dad was a big wrestler who had his own Canadian league

that at one point he sold to Vince McMahon. Federation, if you will. Federation, thank you. He's one of 12 kids. All the dudes, all the dudes were either wrestlers and or referees, like professionally. They just all went into the business. All of the girls, women in the family married wrestlers.

Yes. Mm-hmm. Okay, so. I love it. So his, fuck, I'm trying to remember his homie who he tag teamed with. His British Bulldog. Yeah.

British Bulldog was his brother in law. Yeah, Davey Boy Smith. Like they were family off outside of the ring. RIP, really? I think that happens a lot in wrestling. Like legacy is like a real thing. Right. I mean, look at the rock.

Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. You get kind of shoehorned into it by your familia. And everybody was saying that like he wasn't the most, like he wasn't great at like the talking and all that stuff, but he was so precise with his moves he was known as. The best there is, the best there was,

and the best there ever will be the hit man, Bret Hart, baby. I said this. Yes, but he had something. He had like a nickname called like the fucking something of precision or something like that. Whatever. But like. Boy, he had just a sharpshooter was like his ender.

That was his move. The sharpshooter was his move, but he was just, you, if you watch it like replays of him doing DDTs or whatever these moves are, you can see how he's protecting his wrestler. Sure. Right. Like even when he's slamming them,

like everything's cradled. So like they will not, nothing's going to happen to them. And then of course there's a tragedy of his way younger brother. Owen who fell from the rafters when he was supposed to be like lowered in. He fell from like a fucking craze. He was doing this stick called them.

Did he die? Yes. Yes. He died during an event. They had to cut away cameras. He was, he was, he was doing this stick as this guy called the blue blazer. And his whole thing was is that he would fly in

from the rafters. He hated the stick. It was like mega corny. They weren't like giving him because Owen was like an insane wrestler and like a great villain and shit. Right. But they were kind of like making them all goofy and corny.

And he ended up the fucking rope snapped. He fucking fell the ring and died like. Man, what a shitty way to die. Imagine like somebody falling from the top of staple center. Crazy. Down onto the ring. Yeah.

Crazy. Because they fuck with those wires all the time, man. That's like just what that's like. Crazy story. And then the whole Sean Michaels thing. Yeah, he's had every chapter of that dude's career is like mad. What's the Sean Michaels chapter?

What is that? He was like, he was kind of basically on his way out. He said like, let me get like one last match with Sean Michaels, the heartbreak kid. They had like a legendary feud. And, but Brett was supposed to like win the match before he left. But like, I guess like Vince or somebody backstage

was like, yo, Sean, you got, we're going to make him tap. Oh, fuck. So Sean puts them in his own move. They'll be like, oh, it'll be crazy. Sean's going to put you in your move, the sharpshooter. And then you'll get out, you'll pin him, you'll win. So Vince McMahon is ringside. Sean Michaels puts him in the fucking sharpshooter

and you hear Vince go, ring the bell. And the guy fucking rings the bell. It's over. The ref just like walks off and Brett Hart is like, what? Fucking furious. The plate, it's over. Sean Michaels is like, yeah, I want him out of here. Dude.

And you just see like the reality on his face. He like spits on Vince McMahon. He's so fucking pissed. On his face. Yeah. He just goes, wow. And then he went to WCW. And this is after he turned down a huge deal to go to WCW.

It was, it's crazy. It is. It's a must watch. That is so nuts how much like the wrestling lives bore with the theatrics. Yes. I didn't, I didn't know. Like it is so cool, man.

That's, it's so attractive and so like wild. Like how do they, where are the lines? So hot. I want to fuck a wrestler. You know what I mean? Like anybody from the Hart family. I want to suck the undertaker's dick. Yeah.

I want Jake Snake. Undertaker, he's in there and they have like legit new wrestlers talking about him and you could just tell that he was like that guy and he would always give his six shades. You're not that guy pal. That guy hit it Blake. You're not that guy pal. You're not that guy pal.

Trust me. You're not that guy pal. He has those wraparound stunner shades, right? Yeah. He would always, he would always go up to like a little kid and put them on and they'd be like, they look insane. But you know it like made their fucking life. They were like, oh my God.

Imagine if I could tell you guys I was one of those kids. To this day I'd just be glowing. Brett the hit man Hart gave me his shades. That'd be a good documentary right there. You interview a bunch of kids about where they are now after getting the shades. I mean that's the start of a movie that we would all watch is it's this kid who peaked at age 11

getting a cool wrestler sunglasses. That's like, dude, I want to interview any kid that's ever won a global guts trophy and be like, where is the trophy now and where are you because I feel like I'm right. Where's the piece of the aggro crag? Yeah, that's I feel like I've seen the aggro crag for sale on eBay. Yeah.

And I'm like, it is who gave it up. Was it Wild Mike? Right. Like, come on. Who's Wild Mike? You always had to make up a nickname. That was part of it. It would be like Steven Crazy Legs.

What's the last name? Yeah, but Michael Malley was the host. So it was a little confusing right there. You know. And then Moe. Back to Moe, yeah. Back to Moe. Blake's coming in hot this podcast.

He really is. Maybe it was like Crazy Moe or Wild Moe. Yeah, he's like Steven Crazy Legs. What's the last name? I can't think of a last name. Randall Anderson. Guys, how do eggs work? I'm confused as to breakfast foods.

You get the hard boiled and the easy all that. Do you understand it now? Or like, did we make any? When you get back on set and you have people writing for you, then you get back into reality. You're like, I don't know what to say. Yeah. So you're just confused.

I got I got nothing. I literally have nothing. Hi, I'm David Eagleman. I have a new podcast called Inner Cosmos on iHeart. I'm a neuroscientist and an author at Stanford University. And I've spent my career exploring the three-pound universe in our heads. On my new podcast, I'm going to explore the relationship

between our brains and our experiences by tackling unusual questions so we can better understand our lives and our realities. Like, does time really run in slow motion when you're in a car accident? Or can we create new senses for humans? Or what does dreaming have to do with the rotation of the planet? So join me weekly to uncover how your brain

steers your behavior, your perception, and your reality. Listen to Inner Cosmos with David Eagleman on the iHeart radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Last season, millions tuned into the Betrayal podcast to hear a shocking story of deception. I'm Andrea Gunning, and now we're sharing an all-new story of Betrayal.

Ashley Lytton was helping her husband set up a business Venmo account when she discovered a terrible secret. I scrolled down, and that's when I saw a hidden folder, and I opened it. What the hell did I just see? I was scared that he was coming home. What Ashley discovered that day was a secret so dark

she feared for her life. She was like, oh my god, I gotta get out of the house. He's gonna find out that I've seen this, he's gonna come kill me. Listen to season two of Betrayal on the iHeart radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Between April 1971 and September 1972,

six young black girls were snatched off the streets in Washington, D.C. It took four murders before the police finally realized that one person was responsible. I will admit the others, when you catch me, if you can, sign Freeway Fance. This child was laying on the side of the road. It appeared that she was probably either dragged

out of the car or thrown out of the car. The person said, I murdered your daughter. The killer believed that he may have been seen by the mother. That guy is, he's out of sync with even the worst people. I thought that they would catch him. I thought it was just a matter of time. Is it possible that the killer is still alive? Listen to Freeway Phantom on the iHeart radio app,

Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I watched a documentary on the plane about those Duke lacrosse players who were charged with, not charged, but they were brought up on charges for raping this girl. Oh, right. Wait, what did you read about it? What? Why?

I watched the 30 for 30 documentary. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I had forgot about, I was just like, oh yeah, all those rapists, those guys were rapists. But she made it up, I guess, yeah. And then it came out that she had just made it all up. Right, yeah. So you're a huge Duke lacrosse fan?

Goodbye. No, I was just so confused by it, because I didn't hear that they had made it up. Well, that's the problem is that you thought, right, exactly. And so I think they like sued or something, you know. Oh, imagine, yeah, that would be, I mean, that would be the absolute worst thing in your life to have that happen to you.

I mean, we'll know, but also being raped, maybe be the worst thing ever. Yes, that would be very terrible. Right, there's that. But what you're saying is that would be a bad situation. Yeah, that'd be a horrific situation. And now forever, like, if your dream was to, your lacrosse player, and it was to go to Duke,

or you're the next generation of Duke lacrosse player, you're like, you have to transfer, you have to go somewhere else. You know what, though? Kind of and kind of not, because I've seen dudes rocking Duke lacrosse hats as like a, check me out. That's disgusting.

See, I've seen that too. It's a disgusting habit. But it isn't disgusting, because these guys weren't rapists. No, but they're doubling down on a couple things, which is... I just say, just wear a plain old Duke hat. Like, you don't have to do that unless they're advocating for like, hey, like, check back in, see what happened with that case. Like, these people were wrongly accused.

It was like a terrible thing, but... You want the hat to say all that? Yes, I want the hat. Dude, there's shit all over hats now. It's a big fashion thing. You can put lots of graphics on the hat now. It's all over print shit. What happened?

Sorry, guys. I don't want to dig too deep, but I really don't know what's going on. Oh, yeah. No, we're not going to go back into it. No way. What's your favorite 30 for 30, though? They were falsely accused of rape. Oh, I like Matt Hoffman, I think.

He was like an ex-gamer. That was cool. Okay. Unbelievable 30 for 30. That was a great one. Cool, cool. Yeah, if he fell again, he was going to have a fucking brain trauma. Dude's cool.

Are we taking... Like, are these Olympics actually going to happen, or do you think they're going to get canceled? Ders, I know you've got Olympic fever, or do you not? Oh, everybody's coming out with COVID. I cannot wait for the games. The games to begin. I mean, you know, look, look.

For somebody who comes from a sport where you really only truly get to shine as far as the world stage for Gen Pop every four years, this is it. I mean, there's world championships, but nobody knows that. Nobody outside of the world is swimming or track and field knows that shit. This is it. I'm pumped. I love watching all these sports across the board. I find it so fascinating.

Of course, basketball and these sports where you make gazillions of dollars are off the chain, but there is something to these guys who don't make any money. You know, they have like the, they work at home depot between these Olympic games and all that kind of shit sometimes, and they still do it. And not that that makes it better or more interesting, but it's a whole other facet to being a professional athlete that I think is pretty rad. But like, what about the layer of like, I was seeing like 80% of like people who

like are currently living in Japan are like, we don't think we should have the games here. They're kind of like, let's do it another year or whatever or push this shit. I feel like even before COVID and coronavirus people were like, we're not ready for the games like ever. Like they don't have the infrastructure. They get the contract eight years before or whatever. And then they forget, right? Tokyo's got the infrastructure.

Yeah. Tokyo can handle it. So theirs is only about the COVID. That's why they don't think they should have it. I think that's the main thing. Yeah. Yeah. Because they're, they're not back there. They're kind of still developing a Japanese vaccination there.

Oh, I see. Oh, really? Pfizer didn't, they're not, they didn't just pick up the Pfizer shit. I've heard they're not interested. They want to kind of develop their own. Okay. Oh, sir, I don't like it. Interesting.

Well, then yeah, if, if I was them, I wouldn't want the games there either. They're like, yo, we were way behind. We did not figure this shit out. Don't bring that to the doorstep. Yeah. I guess I, I totally get what they're saying. But also why, I mean, I guess I don't understand that at all. Like why it's a global pandemic. It's just the race to who figures it out first.

Sometimes it is sometimes. And technically it wasn't like some Germans. Like, and, and if you're worried that like, oh, they're going to Americans or whoever developed it is going to poison us with this vaccine, they can do the tests from the, from the vaccine, right? Right. They could actually see if it was a problem before they committed to not taking them. I think it gets complicated because there's also like aspects of like national, well,

there's monetary, but there's also like national pride and being able to come up with your own. Yeah. Sure. But I mean, national pride has to take a backseat when like people are dying all over the place. Okay. Hey, yo. Hey, come on. I don't just, I don't disagree. There we go. And let's get real.

Hey, this is important. Guys, we're so charged. Yeah, it feels like we're like really having mature conversations today. And I like that about us, but the fans won't come. I can't fucking wait though. I mean, what is the opening ceremony going to be? Cause like, I remember if you're an athlete and you have something like big the next morning, you just skip it, right?

But like, who wants to go out there and be around all those people for that long? And I mean, you got to be rocking a mask, but like, even so, like, fuck that. I'm going to just be, you'll find me on the blocks. That's the first place you'll find me. So you're saying if you were in the Olympics, you wouldn't be partying all night and then hitting the blocks hungover. This is it. Eyes on the prize.

You party as soon as you're done, as soon as you're done, you go. I mean, but that's what like MJ, MJ and the dream team would just got. They just got hammered and like gambled all night every night. Well, that was a little different, but what about your boy? Who's the guy who's all like, Gia? What was that guy's name? Oh, Ryan Lochte, party animal. Yeah.

I remember his whole saga. The pride of swimming. Remember his whole saga where he was like in Brazil partying and like they had him like on videos. He said the Duke University lacrosse team. Yeah. He lied until he got stuck up. Got the story. That was a fucking shit show.

Unreal. I was like, when it happened, I was like, what? Like some things just don't add up. You know what I mean? When you hear something like publicly, you're like, I don't know about this. Yeah. And I know a couple of those dudes who he was with because swimmers.

The golden goggles, which is like the Easter swimming. Yeah. No, the golden goggles. It's like there's no other awards other than swimming awards at the golden goggles. Right. Does it go into lacrosse? Does it go in? Sorry.

Like water polo. He's got lacrosse on the body. Water polo. Water polo. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It's USA Swimming, like the organization's awards.

So it's everybody who has swam and represented for the US each year. It's not all water sports like synchronized swimming. It's just purely racing. There was no awards for synchronized swimming or diving. Is there awards? That'd be cool. I'd like to practice our sink swimming thing in Ozarks if we could. For sure.

I'd have to. So how long is this award show? I mean, I feel like it can't be that long. How many races are there to give awards out for? Yeah. It's not that long. It's a couple hours, but it's like, it's nerd prom. It's basically just.

That seems like a long time. Right. It's an excuse for like swimmers to get dolled up and then kind of meet and greet with people who donate money and stuff. So like, if you give a bunch of money, you get to sit at a table with like Katie Ledecky and like E-Pork chops or whatever. Hey, which even with you saying like swimmers to get dolled up because yeah, like everybody's got to wear those dumb caps.

Like you want to see their actual hair. Like I do. You're like, damn, they all have really good bodies, but what's the hair situation? What's under the cap? What's under the cap? And they're not wearing makeup because it's water. It'll make it. The chlorine just ruins all of their hair.

By and large, hair is not great. Hair needs work. Yeah. It's a pretty shitty hair. Not everybody's rocking. There's like some shampoo back in the day for swimmers that was pretty. What was it called? I'll come up with it later.

Right. Ultraswim. Ultraswim shampoo. Go ahead. Riveting. Guys, update on the. Ultraswim shampoo. The Duke LaCrosse case.

Okay. Is this like live update? This is a me just learning about an update. So the girl that accused these guys of rape, and it was like a huge thing. And as it should have been, it was a huge, but it was a huge thing. And then found out she lied. She was convicted of murder. She stabbed her boyfriend to death.

What? When? Before or after? And afterwards in 2013. Well, what happened to her after she got caught lying? Was there any penalty? Didn't she lie under like oath or whatever? I don't fucking know.

Uh, yeah, it doesn't. Doesn't look like she. Was the lie part of that story a truthful thing? Or is that like a. Yeah. Did that cause the murder? Guys, I'm just reading the Wikipedia, but I just thought that was an insane. And it goes back to the bachelor party because.

No, no, no, no, it does not at all. The story doesn't go back to the bachelor party. It does. It does. Okay. Let me explain. Let me explain. So, uh, so Blake and my other best man, or sorry, uh, Zach.

I'm your best man? Oh my God. Wait, what? Oh my God. Zach and Kyle were like, we're going to get strippers and they're going to come to the house. And I was like, I don't know. We're, we're like in our thirties now. I'm like, I don't need that.

I'm not like a 22 year old guy. Like I've, I've seen strippers, blah, blah, blah. It's totally fine. We don't have to do that. And then it literally, I was having this conversation with them. And then I flew that day and saw this thing. And I'm like, Jesus Christ, I'm never going to go. Near as a stripper ever again in my life.

Right. Right. Oh, was she a dancer? She was a dancer and she came to their house. Okay. And she came to their, like, they're basically their frat house and danced and then like freaked out and left and said that she was raped. And, and then all the cross guys were like, no, she wasn't.

And then it was just a firestorm of people being like, what really happened? Fuck you. And then it came back that there was like, she went and got tested and all this. And then it came back that nothing had happened. And she admitted that she lied. Right. Well, honestly, I think I could have a blast just fishing with your dad, watching men in black.

Like that sounds really fun to me. Dude, that's what I'm talking about. So my pitch is we don't hire any strippers, but we do place bets. And whoever loses said bets has to strip for all of us. Oh, right. Okay. I thought it was just going to be high stakes best. I'm down for high stakes bets.

But like I said, I'm going to be wearing a t-shirt pretty much the whole time. So if you want to... Are you? If you want me to porky pig. Yeah, dude, I want to see something, Kyle. If I can if I can porky pig the strip, then I'll do that. So what we're going to do is going to make like just bets on anything going throughout the three slash four days.

And if you lose that bet, you have to take an article clothing off and never put it back on again. Is that what you're saying? Ever again? Ever? Like so. What about the plane ride? Like to get back on the plane?

Like even to get back on the plane. If you're butt naked, you're butt naked and you got... You live like that now. Good luck renting a car. No, it ends as soon as you get out of the car and enter the airport. Then you're allowed to put all your clothes back on. Kind of both people I consider to carry on. So you just have to explain it to your Uber driver on the way to the airport.

He'll get it. Science. That's it. That's the biggest, the biggest hurdle. Kyle, there's not going to be any Uber drivers on the way to the airport. Yeah, it's three hours away. I heard it's fucked up. Are you having a laugh?

Yeah, it is fucked up. It is fucked up, admittedly. I like how that's Adam's rationale. Adam's rationale isn't that you're not going to be naked. It's that there's no Uber drivers. Look, don't worry about those Uber drivers. You will be naked. I'm fine with it.

I want my parents to feel like that they have to move after this bachelor party weekend. That's cool. They can never view their home as a home again. Well, the neighbors were like, how did they bring strippers over or something? And did something weird happen? And my parents were like, no, actually, actually worse. It was just these 40-year-old men winking their buttholes at each other for a weekend. It was actually worse.

Maybe we'll reach out to Speedo. Should I reach out to Speedo and get some bachelor party Speedos made for the gang? Yes. Please. Men in black, men in black Speedos. 1,000 times, yes, please. Speedo rep, I know you're listening. Shout me a holler, Don.

If we could get a gang of liquid death, because I'm going to want to stay hydrated, because we're going to be doing a lot of dehydration. You are. And then also, we got Ashland coming through. They're going to give us a palette of hard seltzers. If we got to go anywhere, specialize, just send those bikes to the Ozarks. And I guess we'll use them there. Whatever works for you guys.

Yeah, sure. And then hot pockets. I like to eat those as well. Those are delicious. Totino's, well, Totino's bagel pizzas. Come on through. Father's pizza or whatever the fuck it was called. Papa Murphy's, dude.

Papa Murphy's. Bro, Papa Murphy's forever. Well, the fact that you haven't heard of Papa Murphy's is so weird, Derz. Never heard of it. It's not like it's a small chain. It's a giant. Uh, I understand. It's the best.

It's the best pizza you could ask for, for taking. It's the best. It's the best. Thank you, Blakey. It's delicious, man. It is. It is. It absolutely is.

Thin crust. It's a thin crust. It's loaded with whatever. Come to Chicago. They have that in Chicago too. Papa Murphy's rocks. It's a pizza. You got to make it yourself, then.

Yes, you do have to put it in the oven. You don't make it yourself. Yeah. Oh, yeah, Kyle. Mr. I don't like to make fucking a fajita and a fucking tortilla, but I'll bring my pizza home and I'll fucking turn it oven on. God damn. The hypocrisy on this podcast.

You guys are dumb as fuck. There's clear lines here. Just be consistent. Fondue. Okay, let me clear it up, motherfuckers. Fondue is something you do at home. I'm not at a restaurant. It's fun for me to pretend like I'm a restaurant.

They do do it at restaurants. Oh, so you, the whole thing for you is to have your house become a restaurant. If I'm at home, it's fun. Have you heard of the melting pot? Have you been to the melting pot, motherfucker? Okay, yeah. If I'm at home, it's fun for me to pretend I'm at a restaurant. You are so dumb.

But if I'm at a restaurant, I don't want to pretend I'm a fucking restaurant. Okay, like it's easy. No, man. I don't want any take-backs or apologies. No, man, you will. Kyle, if you don't apologize to fajitas, I'm fucking showing up at your door with a fondue pot and throwing it in your face. I don't like them.

Hi, I'm David Eagleman. I have a new podcast called Inner Cosmos on iHeart. I'm a neuroscientist and an author at Stanford University, and I've spent my career exploring the three-pound universe in our heads. On my new podcast, I'm going to explore the relationship between our brains and our experiences by tackling unusual questions so we can better understand our lives and our realities. Like, does time really run in slow motion when you're in a car accident? Or, can we create new senses for humans?

Or, what does dreaming have to do with the rotation of the planet? So join me weekly to uncover how your brain steers your behavior, your perception, and your reality. Listen to Inner Cosmos with David Eagleman on the iHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Last season, millions tuned into the Betrayal podcast to hear a shocking story of deception. I'm Andrea Gunning, and now we're sharing an all-new story of Betrayal. Ashley Lytton was helping her husband set up a business Venmo account when she discovered a terrible secret. I scrolled down, and that's when I saw a hidden folder, and I opened it.

What the hell did I just see? I was scared that he was coming home. What Ashley discovered that day was a secret so dark, she feared for her life. She was like, oh my god, I gotta get out of the house. He's gonna find out that I've seen this, he's gonna come kill me. Listen to season two of Betrayal on the iHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If you're looking for someone to help you unpack Queen Charlotte a Bridgerton story,

you're in the right place. It's me, Gabby Collins. Come with me, because on Queen Charlotte, the official podcast, we're stepping behind the scenes and the drawing boards of this team to experience the life breathed into the Bridgerton prequel. Listen to the leaps executive producer and series director Tom Verica took to capture the feeling that's put that lump in your throat. And you've got to catch creator Shonda Rhimes. She's dropping gems, diamonds, and mics. On this podcast, we're going beyond the basic line of questioning and getting to the heart of the show, all while appreciating the contributions

of the show's creative teams and remarkable cast. Go inside each episode of Queen Charlotte a Bridgerton story with the creatives, the cast, and creator Shonda Rhimes leading the way. Listen to Queen Charlotte the official podcast, Thursdays on the iHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or anywhere you get your podcasts. Yeah, with fajitas, I like it. Deris came at me like I'm a fucking asshole for loving fajitas. They're the most, one of the most popular things at Mexican restaurants. They're delicious. They're great. They're delicious. And you get to put exactly what you want on it, the exact amount that you want on it.

Oh, why don't you cry about it? You know what I like at a Mexican restaurant? Oh, wet burrito. Okay. Yo, wow. Good for you, dude. Good for you. Hey, Todd, can you drop the fart noise right now, please? Yeah, drop the fart. That's what I like. Oh, my God. Talk about like the buildup and the no delivery.

The fact that this guy came through with wet burrito. A wet burrito. Hey, you know what's the second worst thing after the fucking fajita? A wet burrito. Oh, shit, man. You fucking asshole. No, that's not good at all. So what do you get that's so delicious, Deris? Yeah, Deris, you high and mighty motherfucker. Holier than Val. What do you get?

Come down from your mountain down. Oh, I don't know. These things called... These things called tacos. Tacos? Get the fuck out of it. Well, that's essentially what a fajita is hard, dude. That's what they are. No, fajitas are dry tacos.

You shut your big yamper. Tacos, fajita, burritos, tostados, they're all the same ingredients packaged differently. That's what they are. Oh, God. Kyle, you probably eat tostados. Get the fuck out of here. I do like to eat the bowl. It's a salad. I do like to eat the bowl.

I'm not gonna lie. Dude, I think that's really cool. And Kyle wonders why he's obese. He's like, I'm eating a salad. Yeah. I eat because I'm on holiday. I like foods where you can eat the bowl, although I'll crush a fucking bread bowl. Dude, I'll shout out a very specific fajita right now. Don Cucco's shrimp fajitas are so fire if you're in the LA area.

My goodness gracious. That is some good damn eating. Cucco's rocks. El compadre rocks. El compadre. And on a scale of dry as a rock to just wind blowing in your mouth. We're in that world. No, no, this is wet, wet, juicy.

This is wet, wet, juicy. Well, the only thing I will say the only thing- Let's keep it real. Let's keep it real. You guys know what I'm talking about, right? The only thing that is dry is sometimes, not all the time, sometimes the chicken is dry. Do you know why it's dry?

The steak is never dry. It's never dry. I know why it's dry. Do you know? Wait, I love this. Do you know why it's dry? I know why it's dry. Oh, please, raise your hand, you dumb fuck.

Why is it dry? I know why it's dry. Why is it dry? Because it's done. The meal is done and they bring it out to the table and it continues to sit there and fucking cook. Okay, wow. Okay.

The setup. It's overcooked, man. Because you fucking brought the kitchen to your plate, you dumbass. Oh, you are fucking- You're a dumbass. You're a stupid dumbass, man. This dude is hammering you to the wall.

Oh my god. Kyle is not only my favorite actor, he might be one of my favorite comedians, too. Just his delivery is spot on every time. I like how he's playing with how close he gets to the camera. Yeah, all of a sudden we drop a few visual things on our Instagram and now Kyle's performing for the camera. Oh, guess what?

Guess what you three are going to be doing next. What? What? Performing to the camera. I just cracked the seal, bro. Oh, you're light years ahead. I just cracked the seal, play with the medium, and then you guys will follow.

Yeah, this is some real groundbreaking shit, Kyle. You're blowing my fucking mind right now. I know. Yeah, Kyle, this is great. It blew my fucking mind. I can't wait to watch your A&E bio. It's going to be off the charts. This is a form of art and Kyle is mastering it

and we're watching it in real time. I love this guy. You see that? That's art, baby. He's so tough. Yeah, do it from go way in the back corner of the room and talk and it'll be the same audio. So, he does were never the same after that podcast.

Dude, I have ideas. I have ideas for how I'm going to use this medium and you guys are going to be like, what the fuck? What are you on? Hey, let's hear it. You guys are going to be like, wow. Hey, you guys wanted a visual podcast? Now you got it.

Look what you got. Oh, look, Blake's doing a Blair Witch project or something. Yeah, look at who's doing it second. Look who's doing it second. Yeah, look, I'm picking up the torch. Daddy breaks the mold and Blake follows. Come and ride that train and ride it. That was good.

I like that. This episode is off the rails. So, for everyone at home, Blake just crawled onto the floor hiding and jumped out at us. I think I told you guys this before the podcast started, but the AC broke in my rental house that I'm renting here in Charleston. It is, I think like it was 82 degrees when I stopped.

It's so fucking hot right now. You got a fan? You got some fan action? No, I don't own a fan. You should go hit a box fan from like CVS or something. I should have today. I was, he was supposed to come like all day. So.

What time is it? It's like, it's nine o'clock. You can still go. I would go just, it's a $20 box. No, see what's nice is my bedroom, actually, the AC. There's multiple different AC units. Happy day. Just the one in the main living room kitchen, dining room area,

is busted. It's a no-go. If I haven't been real chatty today, it's because I'm absolutely fucking miserable right now. When I was a kid, we have like, we had a pretty big house, but like. Rich boy. We had one air conditioner.

We had a very tall house. It was three stories. Well, you have a tall family. That's true. Makes sense. Actually, I'm four inches taller than everybody. Yes, points. But my dad would build this tarp thing that would like,

section off the stairs to go up and down stairs. And then so like the second floor, we would all just sleep on the second floor with the AC thing was like on the landing in that window and it would blast it up. And then we would all just have fans in the doorway blowing into our respective bedrooms. And it was a, I was living a nightmare, dude. It would be so hot.

I'm living a nightmare. Yeah. AC used to not be a big, like that big of a deal. My parents didn't have, I was like 10 or something when they finally got air conditioning. Yeah, me too. I had moved out of the out of the house. Yeah.

I went to college. Yeah. And it was just like a window unit in the living room. And then our bedrooms were just absolutely fucked. And you had to sleep with the windows open. Everything is fucked. Oh. Everybody sucks.

Everybody sucks. Double. I mean, you had an old house, right? Our house was built in like, fucking, I don't know, 1920 or something. Yeah. No, our house was, it was like in the 1800s. It was an old farmhouse in Iowa.

I meant 1720 for me. This is real old and tall. Dude, mine was like 15. My house was a wigwam. It was like one of those, it was a long house, not a whole long house, very, very, very old. You say home, I say cave. I lived in a cave.

We had a little fire we made. The cave was my home. A lean-to. So, Adam, was that the house you had where you had a room specifically made for your BB gun? Like a little rifle range? Is that the same one? Yeah, it was like a, it was super old house.

And I guess it used to be like a B&B. And so like there was just tons of like other rooms that were just kind of oddly shaped because it was a super old house that they just would be like, okay, we'll split this room in half and make this weird little room. And like staff quarters and stuff? I guess so.

And so I had like a BB gun room, which is pretty tight. And I definitely locked myself in an old refrigerator down there and definitely thought I was going to die. Like definitely, my mom was like, don't do this. It's very dangerous. And then I was like, I mean, my friends were shooting each other with BB guns in this room. And I tried to hide from the bullets in the refrigerator

and was like, if my buddy wouldn't have let me out, I would have for sure suffocated. That's just one of the many times I almost died. Was it on or was it just like down there? Like was it plugged in? Yeah, no, it was just down there. It was like they needed to throw it away. Yeah, you couldn't get rid of that?

Yeah. Yeah. Your parents were like, so there's a death trap down here. Don't crawl into it. We're not going to get rid of that. It would be so fun to crawl into it and it would be so cool, but don't do it. Don't do that at all.

Don't do it. Don't even try it, even though it'd be super fun. Did you ever lock your sister in there? No, I didn't. I wasn't mean like that. I would normally try to make my sister, because she really wanted to hang out with me and my friends. So we would be like, oh, you have to initiate by climbing up.

Specifically, you had to climb up this ladder to a balcony in my garage and then walk across this beam that connected the garage door to this balcony, then turn around on that beam, jump the eight feet across, hang on the balcony ridge, and then fall to the ground. That sounds pretty cool, but go ahead. None of us even were able to do it. We've all tried and just bailed and had to jump down to the ground. And I told my sister this and she's like, I'll do it.

And she runs to the top of the ladder, misses the last step, falls 10 feet to her skull. Oh, shit. Yeah, and had a huge goose egg on her skull. And that's why she's cross-eyed. I was going to say it, then you're like, yeah. Okay, so you're on our team? We're playing capture the flag. You can definitely do the thing.

It's immediately like, you're on the team. And she's like, I'm like, you're fine. You are fine. You're fine. It wasn't even that bad. Wasn't that bad at all? You're okay. Let's dust that off.

I'm sorry, mama. I got in some trouble for that one. But I didn't lock her into stuff. It was mostly just like, yeah, do this crazy thing if you want to join our club and thinking she wouldn't try to do it. My brothers would put me in sleeping bags upside down. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

No, I did that move with my little brother, which is an absolute nightmare because you can't breathe. You can't see claustrophobia. And you're just getting your ass kicked. Yeah. I feel like me and Adam used to just like stand with it and fight like that, like put them over our head and then fight. Right.

That was like the plan. But then they'd be like, well, fuck you. You're six years younger than us. We're just going to like scar you. Just pick you up and just swing you around at trees and stuff. Let's go take it. We're going to take them to the lake and drop them in. Tie them behind the car.

It was like The Good Son with the Macaulay Culkin movie. They got they just watched that and they were like, let's do all that stuff to our brother. All this psychotic shit. Yeah. That was Elijah Wood, right? Yeah, that movie rocks. Oh, The Good Son.

Yeah, The Good Son. That movie does rock. Macaulay Culkin was so good in that movie because he was like basically just doing all this stuff from home alone without the like sound effects. Yeah. And the comic stunt version of it. Yeah. Without the like crazy voice.

Yeah, it wasn't funny at all. Yeah. It was still people like stepping on nails. You just didn't have Daniel Stern going. Wow. Right. You had Elijah Wood going. Why are you doing that?

Like so convincingly like stop it. Mom, I didn't. Why? It was good. Yeah. Why did you kill that man with a paint can to the head? I would watch the like R rated like thriller version of Home Alone. Yeah.

I would laugh. That'd be really funny. Is that panic room? Yeah, essentially. Yeah, panic room. They've done it. Yeah, they've done it. It was very good.

What was it? Are you saying it's panic room? Yeah. Right? Kind of. Isn't that Jennifer Lopez? Is it Jennifer Lopez? No, panic room is Jody Foster and Jared Leto when he's got like the cornrows.

The braids. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But do they set up like booby traps around the house and shit? I mean, I think she's smart and there are booby trap type things that happen, but they're just trying to get them out of the panic room. Okay.

Well, sounds great. So we still have a movie idea that we can do like Adult Home Alone where people kill. What would it be? I mean, I guess like Predator is kind of like Adult Home Alone at the very end. Good call. Good call. Arnold sets some booby traps for sure. Get to the chopper is essentially.

Boobies. Ah, the famous quote from Hallwell. Well, are there any takebacks? Apologies. I hope there are. I hope there are. There's a couple I'm hoping to get. Let me apologize.

I'll apologize for coming at you guys about fajitas. I think they're fun. Thank you. They are fun. I think that they bring an ambiance to a Mexican restaurant that you can't get anywhere else. Okay. You're not getting that at a steakhouse. You're not getting that at Kyle's stupid salad restaurant.

Right. Yeah. Sure. Sure. Okay. I stand by that they're dry and not great. But I if you're into them dry, I know why I'm into them. Okay.

Thank you. Awesome. Thank you so much for that. All right. I would I'd like to. Can I apologize real quick? Yes. Apologize for saying the word Hmong again, bringing it back around.

It's just not my it's not going to be my style. To continually talk about disgusting stuff such as munging. So I'd like to discuss it happens. And do you have a fart man brood up because you did say that you're going to make us proud even though couldn't care less. But oh my God. Okay. Well, just Adam said he wanted to be a proud boy.

Yeah. That's what I said. I kept saying that. Give me a moment. Let me see what's happening. You got one. You got one. Cued up.

I don't know. Yeah. This guy came in fart on command. He evidently doesn't deserve the fart mic. If you shit your pants right now. That's essentially munging yourself. Well, while Kyle is trying to muster something up. Brew one up.

I would like to compliment Adam, my brother in fajitas. I'm so glad that I had somebody here to have fajitas back with me because they are legit. Top three item on a Mexican food restaurant. Come on. I love them. And I love that you. Derz was coming at me specifically. Then you took the brunt of it.

You were like you. He was shooting a bullet at me. Yeah. And you dove right and you took it to your chest. And I want to thank Blake for doing that. Yeah, man. Because I didn't have I didn't have the energy today. You know, I'm sweating over here.

My palms are all sweaty. Yeah. It's it's wet underneath here. Yeah. Underneath my headphones. Blake wasn't really saying anything of consequence. Again, louder saying things. That's OK.

Sometimes louder catches the bullet and I did that. No good points. No points. OK, fine. Give you give yourself some points. It's just one of those days. That's for Adam. Thank you.

No farts over here. Who is is that Fred Frederick Derz? Yes, that is that is that is him. No farts, Kyle. OK, well, unfortunately, maybe on the next one. I would I would just like to thank you guys for carrying the load this this specific podcast. You know, I'm I'm I'm wet over here. I'm sweating while it's just sitting here.

It is like 86 degrees. AC is on over here. I'm just sweating though. I think this has to do with the obesity. It might be the obesity. Yeah. How are you obese? I can't stop eating.

Well, hang on. What are you what are you eating that makes you so obese? Because we've been over this. You're vegan or damn near it. I just don't work out. I don't I know, but that doesn't matter. Aren't you eating healthfully? Well, he it's the chippies.

No, I'm not even super healthy, bro. Yeah, I love chips. Yeah, it's the bags of chips. Is it healthy? Is it healthfully healthfully? Are you eating healthy? Are you eating healthfully? I don't know.

I don't know. You call whatever you want it, bro. I'm eating chips. The guys eating the chippies. Is it soda pop? No, I think chips. I think chips are healthy. But I think you eat healthfully.

No, sorry. Not sorry. Not that chips are healthy, but like a fucking what a piece of food is healthy. But to eat healthfully. Yes, yes. And this is another episode of This Is Important. This is important. Peace.

We outta here. Hi, I'm Dave Diegelman. I have a new podcast called Inner Cosmos on iHeart. I'm going to explore the relationship between our brains and our experiences by tackling unusual questions like, can we create new senses for humans? So join me weekly to uncover how your brain steers your behavior, your perception, and your reality. Listen to Inner Cosmos with Dave Diegelman on the iHeart Radio App,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Last season, millions tuned in to the Betrayal podcast to hear a shocking story of deception. I'm Andrea Gunning, and now we're sharing an all-new story of Betrayal. Ashley Lytton was helping her husband set up a business Venmo account when she discovered a terrible secret. I saw a hidden folder, and I opened it. What the hell did I just see?

Listen to Season 2 of Betrayal on the iHeart Radio App, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Between April 1971 and September 1972, six young black girls were snatched off the streets in Washington, D.C. This child was laying on the side of the road. The person said, I murdered your daughter. The killer believed that he may have been seen. I will admit the others when you catch me if you can.

Signed Freeway Phantom. Listen to Freeway Phantom on the iHeart Radio App, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.