This Is Important - Ep 6: What If Your Kink Is Getting Kink Shamed?

Episode Date: November 3, 2020

Today, this is what’s important:Wildfires, sex reveal parties, doctor misdiagnosis, Netflix DVDs, aesthetics, art, and symbols appropriated by white supremacy groups, satirical work, OnlyFans, cameo, sex hotlines, and more. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show, which means he's also back in our ears on The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. The Daily Show podcast has everything you need to stay on top of today's news and pop culture. You get hilarious satirical takes on entertainment, politics, sports, and more from Jon and the team of correspondents and contributors. The podcast also has content you can't get anywhere else, like extended interviews and a roundup of the weekly headlines. Listen to The Daily Show, ears edition on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Ed Zitron, host of the Better Offline podcast. I've been both a tech writer and a tech executive for 15 years, and I've seen this industry grow from a bunch of dorks building things in their garage

into a multi-trillion dollar behemoth that has monetized every corner of our lives. Better Offline is a podcast where I'll lead you through the good, the bad, and the stupid of the tech industry and tell you exactly how venture capitalists and technocrat billionaires intend to influence your digital lives. Listen to Better Off Lone on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever else you get your podcasts. Hello, this is Christina Hutchinson. And Corinne Fisher. We are co-hosts of Guys We F***, the anti-f***-shaming podcast.

We have a lot of really exciting guests coming up on Guys We F***, including comedians Shane Gillis, Nikki Glaser, Michael Rapaport, and Shea Durana about sex, dating, and relationships. You can even email us for advice about your own romantic life. Listen to the Luminary original podcast Guys We F*** on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. It's a Wonderful Life is one of the most popular movies ever, but it has more to offer you than you ever thought. You know how long it takes a working man to save $5,000?

In this world where there's a lot of hopelessness, people need this movie. George Bailey was never born. Join the many partaking in this one-of-a-kind podcast experience. Listen to all 10 episodes available now on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. SaveGeorgeBailey.com. Subscribe now. Welcome to This is Important, a production of iHeartRadio, the show where we only talk about what's obviously the most critically important issues on the planet. Today on This Is Important. The dingle dangles and the flippity whops. The most obese state. There's always a battle for that.

They just whip a dude's diaper off. Show us your wee-wahs and your hoo-hoos. I want to suck your dingleberries. Buckle up. Does it smell like campfire? Until I knew that people were dying and homes were being burnt, when I first moved to California, I would smell that. I'd come outside and be like, I like how just sometimes in the summer it smells like campfire here.

Yeah. It's funky. I'm like, oh my God, what smells like campfire here. Yeah. Yeah. It's funky. I'm like, oh my God, what a fun smell. I wonder what that is. Yeah, that's an aesthetic. Yeah. Fires used to be so charming.

Right. Now they're just something we live with every year. I lived in California my whole life and I really don't remember the fires when I was growing up. Yeah. It's that new shit, dude. Welcome to the new millennium. What's up with that? Are we jumping into the conspiracy part of this right away?

Yeah. Conspiracy? About fire? What are you talking about? Oh, yeah. Fire is conspiracy to you, Kyle? Maybe we need to jump into it. Well, I mean, the electrical lines and how they can pop the houses.

What are you talking about? Conspiracy. Yes, they can. Power lines can break. That is one of the causes of fires. I'm just saying, I did not have them growing up. It's from a gender reveal party. Gender reveal parties.

Is that what it is? Wait, it's a sex reveal party, right? Hey, now. What do you mean? Like an older person? Oh. Oh, my God. It's not a gender reveal. It's like

you're finding out what the sex of the baby is going to be. Oh, are we jumping into conspiracies? Wait, hold on a minute. I was going to say, everyone calls it a gender reveal party, but you're finding out the sex of the child, not the gender. Yeah, okay, I hear you. Because gender is fluid, and so the sex

is the biological term, monology, that we- So, okay. I guess I don't know what this means. So, gender- Is fluid. To me, that was always the bing bongs and the hoo hoos. Right, yeah. I mean, yeah.

Yeah. No, I think that is your- That's where I'm wrong. That's your sex, correct? That's my sex. The dingle dangles and the flippity whops. Wait, which is what? I do not know which one is which in that language.

There's no cursing on this podcast. We just use fun tiddle bits. When you say dingle dangles, what's your reference in there, partner? Cock. Okay. Oh, did you know the little Bengal tigers and ocelots? That was like back on game shows when they'd be like,

when you're making whoopee with your wife. And they just couldn't stop talking about making whoopee. Yeah, and that was the fun game of just how many times you could say whoopee. What's the strangest place you made whoopee with your wife? And they'd be like in the butt and then now on game shows it's what's the strangest place you were pounding your wife out yeah the craziest place she ever sucked your dingle dangle it would be cool if it was holographic, but still didn't say the words. Where it's like, where's the craziest place you wrap rubber bands around the ta-ta-tas

and then snap the bangle bangs with the pliers? I heard your husband's so crazy. How crazy is he? He likes to get his weep-woop stomped on with high heels. I heard your husband was so wacky he likes to get shit on right on the chest you could say that right on the in his mouth that's okay. He likes to brush his teeth with poo-poo. And after you're done, you save the cum and wash your whoopee-whoppee. You might be a redneck. Here's your sign.

This is important. Oh, man. So, but getting back to conspiracy theories and gender reveals versus sex reveals. Fires. Is that the new thing? Like gender, gender, what does gender fluidity mean? Because I know that that's the thing that people say. It's like, no, gender is fluid.

But then they do these gender reveals. They're mislabeled as gender reveals. They should be sex reveals. But people don't want to say sex. Sex is your equipment, right? Sex is your equipment. It's what you got. Gender is how you identify as a, you're like, I'm a guy.

And it's like, you could have a vagina, but you're like, I'm a guy. Oh, okay. Is there like something, because this baby is still being born, like it's still, you know, being made and it can't identify as anything, it's sex right it's being cooked in the baby oven here we go yes kyle i'm just i'm just curious i'm walking down the path just like the over there this baby cannot yeah be like uh you know what sorry i'm not a pink girl i am actually a boy yes i want i want my color to be blue out there uh i know but the people doing this are fucking they don't care okay they're baking blue cakes they don't care and also it's

not up to the baby until they start to talk they don't get us decide which colors they want on the cakes that's just what i'm saying but the point is it's got a dick or a vagina or both that's what the thing is revealing that it's got that yes and then there's a whole nother reveal down the line. When they're old enough to decide what they actually want to reveal themselves as. Or not even old enough, but when they actually have the, when they figure it out. Yeah, two and a half. Two and a half. Nobody cares, by the way.

Nobody cares. It's insane. No. Just have your baby. Just have the baby. Just have it. If you guys had another kid and had a gender reveal I'd come just to kick it with you guys

until you crawl into your you know six month baby hole that's the only way I drink now I don't drink unless some sex is getting revealed do you feel me that's your revealing sex I want to know what a baby is about to be and I'm going to get fucked up.

That's what's up. I'll drink to that. Okay. You know there's some weird, pervy Hollywood Hills sex parties that are like, uh-oh, sex reveal. Conspiracy theories. And then they just pull a curtain back. It's just two people going at it.

They just whip a dude's diaper off. Yeah, that's exactly. Time to reveal the sex, everybody. Get nude. They have somebody in a big big smock and they just tear it off oh boy hollywood get nude show us your we was and your who who's i want to suck your dingleberries oh that. Sorry, sorry. That's poo-poo. Wow. That was my bad. Kyle. I mean, it's just, you know. Turning me on. My bad. My good.

Save take back for later. Oh, my bad. Sorry I said suck your dingleberries. Oh, man. I got to say, guys, I'm a little thrown off today. I'm a little rocked. Why's that? Talk to me. What's up? If you notice, I'm a little thrown off today. I'm a little rocked. Why's that? Talk to me.

What's up? If you notice, I'm a little distant. Is this because the I like to move it guy died? That's one of the reasons. Blake loved to move it, move it. Yeah. R.I.P. I got a troublesome email.

Kind of rocked me. Oh, do tell. Yeah. Yeah. Nah, let's not talk about this. Okay. Why? Do we know what it is? What is it? No, that's improv. Yeah. Yeah. No, let's not talk about this. Okay. Why? Do we know what it is?

What is it? No, that's improv. Yes. No. That's a great improv technique. Yes, and I also got something, and I'm going to talk about it really quickly. Yes, or. What is it, Blake?

Hit us with this hot sauce, baby. I got an email from Netflix, okay? Oh, you got it. Ooh. And I'm not talking the streaming service. Oof. I got an email from the hard copy division. Oh, schnikes.

Yep. Oh, you didn't return demolition, man. What the fuck, dude? Like, out of the blue, they're like, do you still have Little Dieter Learns to Fly? Like, if you don't, we need to do something about it. What do you mean? Also, what is Little Dieter What do you mean? Also, what is Little Dieter learns to fly?

Yeah, let's unpack that first. I think we all know. Has your wife ever made your Little Dieter fly? I don't know. I still haven't watched it. It's literally sitting on my shelf. You have it? Yes, I do still have it. So you have it. So chill.

So yeah, what's the problem? But this is what's weird. It's like, when's the last time I've heard from, I didn't even know the hard copy division of Netflix still exists. Well, obviously you do because you got Little Deeter Learns to Fly. It was sent to your house. I've had that for years. There wasn't even like an intro email. It was almost like an ex-girlfriend from out of nowhere

emailed me like hey do you still have my potholder because if you don't you have to pay for it leaving your potholder what like right and it was like i haven't even talked to you in five years like where's the like hey how are you yo clearly that girl's trying to get back in there yeah netflix has been a little busy, buddy. They've been busy. They've been working on their streaming. They've been working on advancing the industry. They kind of, yes, forgot about the closet that gave out the DVDs, but now they got people there checking it out,

and they need Dieter back. The closet. In their quarantine downtime, they're able to count out how many Dieters flew away. Yep. Right. And now they realize, hey, Dieter did learn to fly over to Blake's house, and for $15.99, we're going to need that back.

Well, I'm wondering, like, do I still pay for this service? Yes. It's so expensive. I just canceled it last month because I was getting three DVDs, like, at a time or whatever. Are you kidding me? But I would probably rotate through the three twice a year. Okay. So, like, six DVDs, I'm paying, like, I think it's, like, $20 or $30 Are you kidding me? But I would probably rotate through the three twice a year. Okay. So like six DVDs, I'm playing like,

I think it's like $20 or $30 a month. What? What? I bet I'm still doing that then. Yeah, it's expensive. Yeah, like how much has Little Dieter Learned to Fly, how much has this copy cost me? I've literally had it for-

Hundreds of dollars. Oh my God. Have you watched it yet? No. Oh dude, that's going to be the most expensive movie you've ever watched. Oh my gosh. You you watched it yet? No! Oh dude, that's gonna be the most expensive movie you've ever watched. Oh my gosh. You better eat golden popcorn. Thank you, Anders. And what,

an MTV award? Yeah, I'll hook you up. Fancy popcorn. Out of a crystal chalice. Little Dieter learns to fly. I'm sorry about that, man. Yeah. Oh, it's by Werner Herzog. Yeah. I thought it was like something for your daughter, where it's just like, hi, I'm Little Dieter. Like VeggieT man. Yeah. Oh, it's by Werner Herzog. Yeah. I thought it was like something for your daughter where it's just like, I am a little deter.

Like VeggieTales? Yeah. This actually looks like really sad. Everyone's like real skinny in it. It's Werner, man. I mean, to be fair, this was a Kevin Etton suggested it back in the Workaholics writers room, like season five. Oh, when he was in his Werner?

Yeah, he was in a Werner mode. Oh, boy. I mean, Werner rocks. Oh, hell yeah, dude. They don't just keep charging you. They make you pay for the one DVD. Adam, it's a monthly subscription. Was there late fees?

Or there is no late fees because it's a monthly? There's not, but you could keep the DVD for... Correct. Okay, okay. It's not like Blockbuster. Shit. But they're charging you for that. Yes.

That is some bullshit, dude. No, what are you talking about? It's a monthly subscription. It's up to you to return it or not. I don't even know my password anymore. Well, why am I going to say it? It's Dingleberry Sucker. Suck my dingleberries out of my hee-haw.

And dingleberries is capitalized. That doesn't seem legal to me. I'm pretty pissed if I have been paying for this the whole time. You're going to take down Netflix? Well, this is like an app that charges you and you're just like, what the fuck?

I've been paying $60 for this peaceful app for the last three months or whatever. It's like, they just get you. It's through DVD.com, right? Now it's called DVDs.com. It's not like Netflix anymore. I don't know. My shit came through saying it was Netflix.

This is like why all those tech companies are probably like really, really worth a lot of money because people just don't unsubscribe. It's the same with gym memberships. Gym, yeah. Yes, dude. That's the whole thing. Subscription models. Have you ever tried to quit 24-Hour Fitness? It was like a fucking three-month process.

It's so back in 07 or whatever. I had to go there they're like the manager has to be here he's only here at this time and it's it like when you can't when you're at work oh yeah well they make it they also like the second you go and i'm gonna cancel and it's like it was fifty dollars a month or whatever it was and then they're like it'll be thirty dollars a month uh any club in the world and you're like i guess i do that for a little while and then that goes for another year or two and you're like i'm literally never going ever so then you go back in you're like hey i'd like to cancel the 30 a month they're like it's six dollars a month

how can you cancel that for six dollars you can play basketball with justin timber i guess i have to keep it it's only six hours a month they're like that's just a sub sandwich so you're gonna cancel you get to do a spin class with lance armstrong for 3.6 a month. They're like, that's just a sub sandwich. So I'm going to cancel it. You get to do a spin class with Lance Armstrong for $3.99 a month. Unlimited protein boost in your shake. Okay. Fuck. And you never take the spin class. You get all the immunity boosts you can handle.

It's ridiculous. Yeah. I'm getting some troublesome emails too of people being like, Hey Adam, it's Barack Obama. I need your help and i open it up he needs a lot of help lately all everybody's needing help and money right now it's election time hey your money i just don't like how it's like a senator barack's a bad example

uh but like when it's a senator you've never heard of, like it's a senator from Wisconsin. A state you've never heard of? A state you've never heard of. East Dakota. And then they're like, we need your help. And you're like, bitch, I don't know you. What's the state you've never heard of? East Dakota?

East Dakota. I don't even think that's a real thing. If you tell me where Pennsylvania is, I've been to Pennsylvania multiple times. I've been there a lot, actually. Right. Do not know where it is. If you told me to find it on a map, I would get in the right area. I would be within a state or two.

It's upper right, right? I don't know. No. It's upper right. No, no, it's not upper. What do you mean? What is it, mid-right? In the middle.

It's kind of upper. No, it's not. It's not total mid-right. It's on upper right. No, no, it's not upper. What do you mean? What is it, mid-right? In the middle. It's kind of upper. No, it's not. It's not total mid-right. It's on the right. It's on the right. It's on the right. It's the long one on the right. That's Mississippi, bro.

Is it up by NY? Is it kind of right by? No, no, no. It's kind of near. It's near, but it's above Virginia. Oh, it's right above like Virginia, West Virginia, right above there? And that's why I said I'd get within a state or two. Andentucky right it's just above kentucky creeps over to ohio well i found a new segment for the podcast learn our geography yeah it's tough break out the maps

where do we live i don't know where new hampshire new england is a whole mystery to me new england is not a state like the fact that new york state is all that and then manhattan is just that little tale yeah blew my mind the first time i figured it out i was like bro you gotta learn your boroughs oh yeah hell yeah oh yeah boogie down the fuck at it the zoo i'm good i haven't spent much time in upstate New York. Is Cornell in upstate New York? Hey, you know what? It probably might be.

It sounds like it. It probably might be. Chances are it could be. Yeah, it totally could be. I did stand up in Cornell a few times, actually. And it's cool because it's like a really nice, I think, Ivy League school. Yeah, Ivy League school. Yeah, it's Ivy League.

And as you're driving in, both times I performed there, they've been like, you know, this is the number one suicide rate per capita. Whoa. We get it every year. Really? Dude, that's like when you go to New Orleans and they're like, we have the most liver transplants. You're like, well, yeah. There's a banner right when you get off your airplane. So tight.

That's like the most obese state. There's always a battle for that. They're like, we got it. We got it this year. We alligator. No, the entire thing. Yeah, it's so weird how people could wear that as a badge of honor. Look, when that's all you have, when you're the most at something you gotta fucking rock it

well blake bringing up that troublesome email reminds me of remember that time i came in the workaholics writers room and i was like three hours late or something and i'm like sorry guys i'm so late i actually the craziest thing happened to me last night and this morning and you guys were like okay what traffic or something again? Another big poop. We'll do it again. What happened, Adam? What happened? Another crazy night. Okay. And the night before me and Blake were roommates, Blake's ex comes to me and it's like, Hey, Adam, some weird guy gave me this envelope to give to you, told me not to look in it. And I go, ah,

yeah, I don't know. My, it must be my manager's office or my agent's office or something with a script. Something Hollywood residuals. Yeah. It's part of my team.

I don't know. Seems Hollywood. I open it up and it was a letter from the guy that said, of like the LA County person that lets you know if you have AIDS. Oh, fuck. Yeah, dude. I remember. Oh yeah. Do you know if you have AIDS. Oh, fuck yeah, dude. I remember that. Oh, yeah.

Do you remember this story? Yes. It's bizarre. And so I try to call. I call in the office right away. It was too late. I got home late at night. He opens up his office at 9 a.m.

So at 9 a.m., I'm like, obviously I can't sleep. I think I have AIDS. The AIDS. And so the AIDS, capital A, capital I, I think both capital DNS. All stand for something. It all stands for something. Not sure. No way to tell.

Adam, Adam, you idiot. You done sexed your life away. You done sexed your life away. Adam, the idiot done sexed his life away. Sexed his life away. I think that's what it is. So the next morning, I can't sleep at all. I call in and get a hold of the guy.

And he's like, as I'm sure you know, you've tested positive for HIV. So crazy. The HIV virus, I guess. And I'm like, hold up now. What's that? No, I didn't. And I had gotten a STD test in Omaha, Nebraska when I was back home visiting my family. And I was like, you know what? I'm going to go to. And then I go, and this is in California where this is happening. And he's like, well, you have AIDS.

I'm like, I do not. And he goes, you do. And that's the first stage of denial is saying you don't have it. We're here for you. We're here for you. It's very common. And we're here for you. And I will drive over to your house right now to talk to you about it.

And I'm like, you do not have to do that. I do not have AIDS. I just got tested by my doctor back home he says i'm all good i'm in the clear and he goes he says that you have aids or hiv and so i call my doctor the nurse goes what the fuck when i tell her this story she said what the fuck sorry nurse the fuck and i'm like yeah and she goes um uh hang on puts me on hold for like 10 minutes the scariest 10 minutes of my life the whole time exactly where i'm just thinking i have aids my whole life is turned upside down i could die right and they came back on the line they're like

the doctor won't speak with you he's pissed because he thinks that i'm going to sue him right and i go well do i have aids and they're like right no from the test that we took from you you do not have aids or any std right and uh or anything and i go what the fuck she's like that's what i said yeah somehow they sent over that i have aids to california no idea how this happened yeah the most insane thing i probably could have sued for a fortune right and that's why the doctor didn't talk to me and then i talked to this guy again and he like still didn't believe me and then i got like a std test the next day and and i was i was all good right so it was it did come from your doctor in omaha you didn't get tested in california also right my doctor said that i had aids dude that's so scary that we gotta get to the bottom of this and i'm glad

we're putting it out there on the podcast so that the millions of listeners can get to the bottom of this because what the fuck millions billions bitch yeah oh to the bottom of this. Because what the fuck? Millions. Billions, bitch. Yeah. Oh, my B. I mean, you're probably not the only person who's been misdiagnosed with HIV. I mean, that's just so frightening. What the fuck?

What was so scary is it wasn't like, it wasn't a practical joke. It wasn't like I came in the office and you guys were like, gotcha, bitch. That would have been pretty sick. Which would have been... Amazing. An elite level slam. Like, I looked up via the Google that this guy is the guy to tell you that you have HIV. Yeah, we set up that page. Official letterhead, like the whole thing.

It was absolutely terrifying. I mean, anytime you go in for any kind of std test it's extremely nerve-wracking even if you know you've been good as soon as you take the test you're like i've got something i'm fucked yeah you're like oh yeah dude yep anytime you've ever like itched your balls you're like that's something that's something oh i can tell yeah for sure i remember working at like bj's pizza allegedly and just like after taking the STD test, and I'm like, my dick just does not feel good. There's crystals in it or something.

I got the one STD that produces crystals. That's so sick. Yeah. That's a good one. Sea monkeys and something. Well, you look up, and then you Google, my dick feels like it has crystals, and you Google it, and it's like,

sure enough, that is something gonorrhea yeah if you anytime there's any sort of sickness crystallization uh in the shaft of your cock for sure that's bad that's bad that is uh that's herpes simplex q herpes syntax syntax what's the q complex huh, huh? Syntex, what? I'm coming rocks. I'm coming rocks. Siri, I'm coming rocks. Is that a problem? Hey, coming rocks. But it shouldn't have rocks.

Right. Hey, what's up? I'm Blake Anderson. I'm here to talk about... Coming rocks, but it shouldn't have rocks. Herpes syntax Q. It's not a game. Definitely not a game to play with.

Not a game. Rocks hurt. It really hurts. There you go. Sticks and stones may break my bones. But rocks rip your dick hole. Oh. Oh, my God.

That guy is sick over there. He's sick. He's twisted. This is when we need sound boards. All righty then. He said it, not me. Allegedly. Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show,

which means he's also back in our ears on The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Join late night legend Jon Stewart and the best news team for today's biggest headlines, exclusive extended interviews and more. Now, this is a second term we can all get behind. Listen to The Daily Show Ears Edition on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcast or wherever you get your podcasts. the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, Ed, why can't I get good results from Google anymore? Like, it's just a bunch of junk now, like nonsense, AI gibberish, and, like, ads. I can't actually get answers to my questions anymore.

Well, Robert, this is something I've talked about on my weekly tech podcast, Better Offline, and I call it the raw economy. Google isn't incentivized to give you good search results anymore. What they are incentivized to do is to have more search results and have sponsored content that makes them money and search engine optimized content that makes other people money so that Google can make more money. It's all part of a growth all cost system that is destroying the tech industry. Better Offline is a podcast where I'll lead you through the good, the bad, and the stupid of the tech industry and tell you exactly how venture capitalists and technocrat billionaires intend to influence your digital lives. Listen to Better Offline on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever else you get your podcasts.

Hello, this is Christina Hutchinson and Corinne Fisher. We are stand-up comedians and co-hosts of the legendary Guys We F***ed, the anti-slut-shaming podcast. This podcast is the template for every sex, dating, and relationship show you have heard. We have the uncomfortable conversations that you don't want to have or you've never had or you're going to want to be a fly on the wall for. So why aren't you checking it out? And we have a lot of really exciting guests coming up on Guys With F***, including comedians Shane Gillis, Nikki Glaser, Michael Rapaport, and Che Durena about sex, dating, and relationships. You can even email us for advice about your own romantic life. Do it. I dare you.

Listen to the Luminary original podcast, Guys With F***, on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. than you ever thought. You know how long it takes a working man to save $5,000? In this world where there's a lot of hopelessness, people need this movie. George Bailey was never born. Join the many partaking in this one-of-a-kind podcast experience. Listen to all 10 episodes available now

on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. SaveGeorgeBailey.com. Subscribe now. You know, my dad had to like he passed out because he had like a heart thing when he was in barnes and noble he passed out and he had to go to the hospital this was like when we were filming house party new orleans edition and he was like my mom was freaking they got the ambulance there they took him to the hospital they looked him over and then they were like you're good and my dad was like he's lying what's up he was like what the fuck i'm not good i just passed out and they left and then like you know they did a little bit of research on the googs

and they were looking at it and they're like that doctor was wrong like completely wrong like this is horrible so they go back to the doctor they send him home again they go back again and they're like oh you have massive clogs in three of your arteries and you have to have a stent and a fucking uh whatever the defibrillator thing put into your body so that if it happens again it's so likely that if it happens again it's gonna go ahead and pop pop you up good dude my god yeah and they fucking sent his ass home. I thought you were going to say he went to the hospital and he was like, hey, while I'm here, I got these crystals in my dick. Full crystallization. He dealt with that in the 70s.

Don't tell anyone. I'm just here for the heart thing. But if you could just scrape those off. How it normally happens, though, it's normally like, no, actually, you're fine. And then you're like, I actually do have something that they overlook. Right, right, right. I feel like it's very rare for them to go, you've got stage four cancer. And then they look again and they're like, actually, you have no cancer, which essentially was me getting AIDS.

You know what I mean? Stage one. We were wrong. It's stage one. I don't know what that is. I'm just kind of speaking to how it's like, what the fuck are they doing? They're treating... They're best, Kyle.

They're doing their best. Are they? Are they, Blake? That's the question. Are they? I don't know. Yeah. Because we sure pay a fuckload for them.

We pay a fuckload for them. Some of them. Just go to the right ones. You got to suss them out. Find a good doctor. Fair. Yeah, smart. This is important indeed my goodness men's health everyone out there uh find your good doctors i'm gonna do a real quick

early apology for yelling right there just reminded me of when i was sad because i thought my dad was really hurt so that was an early it's an early apology that's understandable and i'm sorry hey you don't have to apologize about that. You definitely have to apologize about saying suck your dingleberries. Yep, definitely. I feel like that is an apology we all need and want. We'll see if that comes to fruition at the end of this hour. We'll see.

Tune in. I'm going to dangle that one along. Everybody listening to the pod, stay tuned. There it is. He said that. That was a joke he said. Yeah. Yeah.

What is your, Kyle, what does your hat say? Oh, it says bored. Oh, yeah. And now what is bored for the listeners at home? This is a company called Bored Teenager founded by my good friend, Blake Anderson, who has been dressing me since before he had a company. I've been wearing all of his hand-me-downs, all of the stuff that he was going to give to Buffalo Exchange.

I got first dibs, and now it has just progressed to where I get clothes from his company through Zoomies. Actually, interesting you guys bring that up. Teenage was actually featured in the new documentary feels good man i don't know if you guys are uh aware of that oh yeah what is uh what is feels good man feels good man is about the artist matt fury he's the guy who created pepe the frog yeah and if you recall it became a alt-right hate symbol my favorite i remember that i i really was like not i did not want to subscribe to that bullshit and i wanted to wear the shirt but yes i i couldn't i like i just

couldn't bring myself to do it it was like so strange so what yeah i remember when that frog became uh the symbol for hatred yeah a lot of stuff uh i don't even know exactly what it was a symbol for but why that frog it i mean the whole documentary kind of goes in depth about it there's you never know what the internet what it's gonna latch on to really it just kind of the drawing just encompassed a lot and it kind of just took fire on like 4chan and spread from there i mean it was just like a meme yeah probably an original meme that was like a hitter super funny to the white power community and then they probably just started making more right and using the same frog yeah well isn't it something like they they see something

that actually has traction and then they attach a meaning to it because it already has traction so it's like the meme was fucking hitters so then some trolls can be like i'm gonna fucking jump onto that right now and make it feel this here this dude this is the one that fucking kills me and now it's like real and now you're like well fuck the white power thing where they're basically doing the tight butthole from workaholic sign oh yeah or like the game where if like you make a circle with your thumb and pointer finger oh yeah pop the bubble and you like have it below the belt and if your friend sees it you get to punch them if they pop the bubble they get to punch you now

if you're doing that people are like this dude's just doing white power like i have photos where i'm like i'm getting somebody to look down here and now it just looks like I have hella white power photos. And this is my cover. No, the exact same thing. I have photos of like me, like while shooting Modern Family, like I'm doing like the tight butthole thing. And it just it's like the white supremacists have taken a hold of that. And people are like, well, what is that? Like we have we workaholic shirts talking about how I'm alt-right because i had all these old photos of me doing that thing i'm like well it was a thing before it was a white power we have shirts from workaholics with the tight

butthole thing on them that's like just fully emblazoned on the front but it's also it's only if you subscribe to it like the the in basketball like i love going to basketball games i got season tickets for the clippers and when someone shoots a three and makes it you throw up the three fingers that's just what everyone does everyone's done it for years and i'm still gonna do it i'm not gonna stop doing it because but that's like at a basketball arena. For sure. Right? So that's in there. Yeah. You wouldn't walk around doing it anywhere else, right? Well, I mean, I might do it while watching a basketball game at a bar or something.

You know what I mean? I'm not usually screaming like three just walking down the street. You might have to start. You might have to start. Just throw up five. Just throw five pointers. Just throw up five pointers. Five points. Five pointers.

Five points. I just don't know the rules. I remember when New Balances were about to be the fucking white tucked in polo khakis. They were like, polos and khakis is white supremacy. I'm like, my fucking whole wardrobe. What are we doing here? Okay. White supremacy thing is blue jeans and any kind of t-shirts and any kind of tennis shoes. It's just like cultural differences, right?

Like the fucking, I'm going to talk about my dad again because- Break it down. Oh, God. Because he made a school in Korea when I was eight years old. He had to go over there and travel. He made a school? Yeah, he designed it and they built it for a school over there. So we had to go.

But in one of his trips, he played got your nose with a kid where you pretend to grab the nose and then you hold your thumb out through the thing. And it's like, hey, I got your nose right here. And you can see it. But in South Korea, what that symbolizes is the bird it's like fuck you so the kid ran away crying wait got your nose is fuck you yes no having your thumb through the finger thumb through the finger is the middle finger in south korea at that time i don't know if this is in like 93 maybe it's changed but that was i mean i know hilarious i love that hey kid fuck you yeah your dad just your dad just punches a kid in the nose and then flips him off

mom he grabbed my nose and then said fuck you yeah so we just have those differences now that are seated in our country that we don't even know where the fuck all the states are so it's like of course there's going to be major differences that's true you don't know what they're doing in east dakota or nah fucking new hampshire lower state new york yorkshire lower new orleans i mean it's all just about we're just such the generation that's learning the internet and like any kind of symbolism and all that stuff it's it's just kind of crazy but the documentary is cool give it a look see and what is that called again feels good man because that was the original meme right feels good man that was what pepe was saying that's what the frog pepe says in the book that he's from boys club ah oh boys club oh boys club okay it's really funny it's so funny to see what this all was birthed from

like in the cartoon he like pees with his pants all the way down to his ankles you know how some people do that in a urinal some people children right children yeah little kids or very drunk well and his roommates like why do you pee like that yeah why do you pee like that he's like dude i love when you walk into the public restroom and a homie is busting out the all the way to the ankle it is a strong move you know that dude's got jokes that dude's got something wait explain this meme the one where the dude's got the fucking draws at the ankles oh that's just what happens on the comic book is like his roommate walks in and he catches Pepe peeing that way. And he's like, why do you pee with your pants all the way to your ankles?

And he just says, feels good, man. And that's it. And then that became the international symbol of the alt-right. And the alt-right, like, you know what? It does feel good to have hatred and bigotry in our heart. Wouldn't that just be like the cuck symbol? You're like, look at this fucking bitch. Pees with his fucking pants and his ankles. I mean, it's taken out of context.

It's like just the one picture. Oh, context is done, right? Yeah, it's hard to track context down. Well, that's how it all starts. You can't even find it in context. It's impossible. It's hard to track context. It's hard. It's actually really hard very hard like when people get in talking about blackface and they're like well the context we know the

joke we know that it's bad and that's why we did it on the show and it's like well you still did it to do the joke so don't like it doesn't matter about the context because the context of the real context is deeper than your context of your show for 20 minutes or whatever. Right? Right. Yeah. Yeah. I hear you.

Holler. Who knows? I take it back. I'm wearing blackface. Yeah. I was wondering when you were going to say something. Maybe not. Yeah.

You almost went for it. This is a charged up app. This is important. My goodness. God damn. This is important. It is important, my goodness. God damn, this is important. It is important. You know what I heard?

Allegedly that that three-finger, the tight butthole switch to white power was a joke that backfired. I need more. What does it mean? I can't cite it. I can't, like, I just heard that allegedly somebody. It's fine. Just make it up. What's the context?

Allegedly somebody put out that the three fingers up in the air is the w4 white power or well it's a w and a p because this the oh is that what it is but i i did hear that allegedly that it was a joke that somebody put out to say how absurd this is that you can take something as simple as like a okay man oh sure and turn it into a white power symbol just like pepe trying to actually do the pepe but the joke the satire actually became reality and this is what i think that's why context is out any satirization in comedy is fucking dead you cannot do a satire it's not it is i think it is that it forms a wp yeah i thought yeah i mean it's a it's a fine line it's sort of how we were and we were

walking the line with workaholics of like satirizing like bro culture because that is us to an extent but obviously not as far as we took it, then people would meet us in public and think that I am Adam DeMamp, just a total fucking lose your mind maniac. Right. And you're a totally different person. Your name's Adam Divine. Divine. Different guy. And I don't totally lose my mind. I'm halfway there. How about when we came up with the idea of Stan Halen to kind of illustrate how we're not what that is? Well, let's explain. So Stan Halen, the ultimate frat bro possible in an episode of Workaholics.

And the guys are like, oh, we wanted to be in a fraternity, but nobody wanted us to be in one. Yeah. He's a sales rep for Oakley. There's that. He wears golf gear constantly yeah and we wanted to be like him and then found out that we just couldn't chug vodka up our buttholes and like tap each other's dicks constantly and stan hailing became everyone's favorite character i will say that might have been because the actor who played him is super funny. Will Greenberg.

He's a legend. Yeah, Will Greenberg. Yeah, that's why when Taika come out with fucking Jojo Rabbit, in the actual trailer, it says in big, bold letters, a satire for the ages. You have to really put the context of a satire out there in order for people to understand it. Because if you don't... That satire out there yeah in order for people to understand it because if you don't that is satire isn't it because taika was just able to do it and make it work yeah but satire

is not really supposed to be holding to saying that it's a satire you're supposed to be able to look at it and be like that's so fucking absurd that's obviously yeah yeah a satire that's the fun of it well and admittedly people were bummed out about the depiction of Hitler being like kind of a kooky, fun, best friend character. Right, right. I remember when that movie first came out, people were like up in arms when you're like, well, obviously this is a delusional little kid's daydream and it's a satire. But, you know, people be offended. But you have to really throw it out there. You have to throw it in people's faces or to cover yourself basically.

Otherwise you're going to get like, you know, mobbed on. I mean, there's a healthy thing happening with the internet and social media. That's like, I would call it a global empathy where now you're exposed to everybody that you may have not have been exposed to before. And you would joke about it. And now it's like, actually, Hey, that hurts me and 10,000 other people's feelings. And you're like, that's a lot of 000 other people's feelings and you're like that's a lot of people maybe not on earth but like if all of a sudden 10 000 people showed up on your street to knock on your door and say dude you just fucking dissed me and everything like about me you'd be like oh okay my bad so like yeah it's it's so true it makes you think twice about the

jokes you're spitting you know like and you got to come from a place that is universal, like dingleberries and farts and stuff. You know what I mean? Hey, everyone loved that. I think they're all replaying that right now. I feel like we'd get 10,000 people at the opening of this podcast being like, you know what? I was offended by you saying you want to suck my dingleberries.

Yeah, but out of my hee-haw. I was born with a hee-haw and was teased constantly about it. Stop kink-shaming me, man. Oh, that's true. You can't kink-shame. Don't kink-shame me. No. Don't you dare.

You can't kink-shame. That is my kink. I like to be shamed. Yeah. That's my kink. Oh, see, my kink is shame, so try it. So, yeah, please. Yeah, it could go any which way, way baby you think there's a guy out

there named kink shane it's like he's gotta like correct people hey it's me kink shane shane with an n well what kind of name is a king also yeah his first name's kink and is it what yeah whose first name is king no no no i'm saying like he's into it he's into kinky stuff so he's like online he's like welcome to kink shane uh and they're like well what i don't know that's a reach i think he'd be called kinky shane let me save this for my other podcasts do we do the four of us get an only fans and i'm serious about this make some extra coin during the pandemic kind of get through this time, 2020. What is it? Can you explain to me what an OnlyFans is?

Because I don't know. I have no idea. OnlyFans, I don't want to go behind the paywall because then that's a slippery slope. And I don't want to lose the house and have to explain to my fiance that the reason we have to sell the home is because I'm watching people jerk off on the internet. Oh, this is a porno thing i think so it's i don't think it initially was supposed to be that it's an anything it's supposed to be like i do magic tricks watch me on only fans my fans can come and help support me it's evolving and then like most things that happen on the internet it evolves it evolves it devolves

into people jerking off and so i think that's and get and getting paid yeah yeah and getting paid and like the big story was bella thorne who is an actress uh she's been in a bunch of movies she was like a disney kid i think disney girl yeah and she went on there and she was like pay me 200 extra and you can see all of my hot nudes. And then all these like horny fucking dudes were like, yeah, okay. And she made $2 million in a day. Wow. Wait a second.

I want to say allegedly in there. I think the whole thing she said was she's going to go on fans only and not show anything, but you'll get to see something that nobody else will get to see, which is like her daily routine or whatever. From what I read, she was saying that... From what I purchased and paid $200 for, she said that there was going to be nudes, and then people went on there

and there wasn't nudes. I want you to be the Google guy. She said there's not going to be. Well, this is a big crux to the story. So she made $2 million off of a miscommunication, and I'm saying, yeah, let's join this motherfucker. In a day. Yes.

Let's miscommunicate. As long as we rubber band our dicks together. We will not rubber band our dicks together for an extra $250. A bouquet of ding dong. We will not suck each other's dingleberries for an extra $250.

We will not. I said not. It was in a extra 250 bucks we will not i said not it was in a small font but it's written smaller font oh god all righty then adam's got his serious detective face on he's looking he's looking this up he's like i am looking yeah oh yeah she promised no clothes nudity no clothes nudity that's a weird way to phrase that right yes it was 200 to go past her regular pg-13 account which essentially was just she was repurposing photos from her instagram supposedly and then there was a 200 photo set that subscribers could get that with the promise of in quotations no clothes nudity so she yo, I'm going to take my pants off and show you guys my wing-wong.

Wing-wong, wing-wong. So what is clothed nudity, though? What the hell are they trying to say right there? You know. I don't think it was any... It's just this girl. She might not be great with words. I don't know.

She just wrote no-clothes nudity. I don't think she's a... She's on OnlyFans. She might not be great with words. I don't know. She just wrote no close nudity. I don't think she's a... She's on OnlyFans. She's not a... A doctor. She's just trying to show her tits and ass for some money. And guess what? It worked at the tune of two milli for a day.

Applaud him. Yeah. And also Plaxico Burris, the ex-football star, who shot himself in the dick. Isn't that the guy that shot himself in the dick, Blakey? He did? Yeah. He was at a nightclub.

I don't think it was his dick. I think it was his foot. But his gun definitely did go off in a strip club or something. Yeah, his gun, he had it strapped in his waistband, and it went off, and he shot himself and got in all kinds of trouble, missed games and all kinds of stuff from the NFL. He's on OnlyFans, too. So I'm like, what is this guy doing?

Is this guy jerking off? Well, so, yeah. So what is this? This is like Cameo, but porno is allowed on it and all that good stuff. Yeah. For now. Cameo is strange anyways. Like, Cameo is like.

Are you on Cameo, Kyle? No. No. I thought about it. Oh, man. I would pay for that. I would like a. Oh, man. I would pay for that. I would like a Cameo from Kyle. I'd pay for that, too.

I would spend all my money just getting you to say, greetings, Adam. Giving me little pep talks throughout the day. Greetings, Adam. Dude, yeah, I thought about it. But then I was like, no, I'm not going to do it. It seems pretty wacky. You think I should do it? Yours would be good. Yeah, I think you'd be really good at it. Yours would be worth it. I thinky you think i should do it yours would be good i think

you'd be yours would be worth it i think you'd be really good at it yeah you'd be at least as good as brett farve geez everybody has one it is weird how many people have one when you're like brett farve do you need the extra hundred dollars or two hundred dollars or five hundred dollars or whatever it is per video like Like he's rich as hell. I understand some celebrities are like, you know what? An extra however many grand a month would really help out. But for Brett Favre, for sure, if he didn't just totally blow his money on OnlyFans accounts, he should have enough to not do the cameo.

I also think he might charge like a lot. Some people charge quite a bit. I think there's a cap on how much you can actually charge, though. I don't know if there is. There's a recommendation of it. I'm not going to lie. I looked at it. I was like, when it first came out, I'm like, how much can I make just

slang and words? That's a lot of dough. I think people like Caitlyn Jenner, she charges like 2Gs, $2,500, something like that, every time she says happy birthday to someone. lot of dough um but yeah i think like people like caitlin jenner she charges like uh like two g's 2500 something like that every time she says happy birthday to someone geez yep i'll take it well i'll do it for fifty thousand dollars per happy birthday that's a lot of dough that's so nice of

you yeah that'd be great i'd do it for that yeah just the only people who ask you for happy birthday messages are like sultans. Are just billionaires. Yeah. And it never happens. It never even won time. Yeah, still waiting. I've got some good happy birthdays waiting. Any day now. Any day now. Ready to say happy

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SaveGeorgeBailey.com. Subscribe now. It looks like we lost Derzy. Yeah. Yeah, I'm pretty bummed about that. Derzy is on a little vacation in the woods. There he is. All right.

And he's back. Oh, here we go. We just realized we had lost you. Can you hear me? Yeah, we asked you a question and you didn't answer, and we're like, that's very telling. Dude, he's back. Here we go. We just realized we had lost you. Can you hear me? Yeah, we asked you a question and you didn't answer and we're like, that's very telling. Dude, he's mad.

He's so pissed. She said she did not want to show those things. We're back on the Bella? Correct. She did not show the nudity, no. Bella Thorne. Okay, and what's your question? We were talking about Cameo

because we were talking about how it's weird. this is just the porno version of cameo yeah it is cameo man you know what i don't like people doing cameo getting old ex-famous people or whatever to do cameo so they can kind of like clown on them it's fucking gross i don't like it uh that being said i definitely want biz marquis to intro the podcast at some point. For sure. And we're not going to be clowning. I'll say that. There's no clowning here.

We're getting people that we are fans of. I will say. Hey, I just want to finish my sentence, which was that Biz Marquis is in the hospital and maybe be dying right now. Really? Oh, is he? Just a heads up on that one. What's up with Biz Marquis? Oh, no.

Biz. I think he's just got health issues. He's a big guy. Oh, is he? Just a heads up on that one. What's up with Biz Marquis? Oh, no. Biz? I think he's just got health issues. He's a big guy. Oh, man. He's getting up there. It's not COVID, is it? I don't think it's COVID related, but yeah, I think he had diabetes in the past, so we hope he heals up. But yes, to get him. But I want to get him on the up and up.

You can beat diabetes? You can beat diabetes? Sure, yeah. Like, if you had it in the past, can you not have diabetes? Well, you can maintain. Yeah, I'm saying, like, I remember him announcing, like, he had diabetes. Oh, okay, I see what you mean. Allegedly. I was just, I didn't know that you could, if you could, I didn't know you could, like,

you know, put diabetes into remission or however you want to describe that. Yeah, you do insulin and all that shit. Oh, it's just, it's managed. Oh it's managed oh i see prick the thumb yes and at that point it's no longer a threat to your your temple well no you just gotta like not be sipping a gang of orange juice or whatever yeah you gotta watch your shugs yeah you gotta just tolerate the shugs watch your shugs baby maintain the shugs i'm on cameo right now and i'll say say that there's not a lot of people that you recognize there's people that are like an actor so far down

the call sheet on a possible show that there's no way that you know who they are is E. Griff up on here? oh yeah then for sure we have to pay Eric Griffen to how much is he?

let's see how much Egriff is. $75, but he will chat with you for $2.99. Well, guess what he's going to be doing on the next podcast? We're getting him and we're chatting up some Egriff. That'll be the best $2.99. Oh, $299.

That's not too bad. Yeah, how long is the chat? Does he got a cap on it? No, $2.99. It literally is $2.99. Per minute? Probably a minute. Whoa, that is such a strange way of thinking about this celebrity. Like, it's like phone sex when we were kids.

Yeah, and you could just chat it. Wait a second. It's like phone sex when we were kids. Yeah. What? When you would be like, well, I know what you're talking about. It was like. Yeah. Yeah. You get a hold of a credit card. You dial it in. Dial 1-900- were kids. Yeah. What? You would be like, well, I know what you're talking about. It was like. Yeah.

Yeah. You get a hold of a credit card. You dial it in. Dial 1-900-HOT-TWITZ. Yeah. Hell yeah, dude. And then you were like. Hot whammy blammies.

Like for only $1.99 a minute, I will. I'm like, what does that mean? Wait. Will the boys have conquered, Kyle and Blake? Will you tell everyone out there about the number you would call to find out the time? Oh, multiple Mona. Mona? Yeah.

Multiple, it was Mona. Mona, baby. Yeah, you could, because what was the thing, you used to be able to call a thing called like popcorn. Yeah, it was like 676-1111 or 1234. It's spelled like popcorn. And this one was like 7 seven six one one one one or one two three four it's spelled like popcorn and this one was like seven six seven one two three four they switched some it was like a joke just stop talking about it and explain you call it so popcorn you call and you got the time it

was say at the beep the pacific standard time is this that's the context back in the day when when nobody had a fucking cell phone that was all synced up to the same thing you had a watch and you would have to call a number and it would say at the tone, the time is exactly blah. And you would go boop and synchronize your watch. But in Concord, you had... Mona. Yeah, some sick person in the Bay Area made Mona. That would be like at in two...

What is it? Oh my God. Wow. At the sound of the moan, it'll be my God. Wow. At the sound of the moan, it'll be two o'clock. But she would say, at the sound of the moan, it will be 4.30 sex. Right. And that's how you got your tongue. So tight.

And it was free and you could call and beat off to that. Because you know that was happening. Yeah, man. You call and beat off to that. Because you know that was happening. Yeah, man. You call it from the house phone. They're like, mom picks up the line. Mom, I'm on the phone. I'm on the phone. I'm on the phone. The sound of the moan.

It's 4.30 sex. Dude, I called that number so many times outside of Mountain Mike's Pizza just to confirm that she was saying sex instead of six. And that was like the fucking hottest thing to eight-year-old me.

Also, whose mom did that? She was such a trooper. Shout out to Mona. Trooper. You really killed it. A pioneer. It was 1-800 or 1-900? It was a local number. Yeah, it had to be free, right? No one's paying for that. It was just a local number.

It was so tight. Yeah, it was like 925. You just call it. It was the homie's mom. It was the neighbor mom. You know it was a guy. No. At the top.

For sure it was a dude who's like, the mom. Yeah, this is San Francisco. People were pulling some wool over our eyes. There's no way. There's no way. There's no way. There's absolutely no way you take a bath. It was so

dope. You guys didn't have that? Don't assume Mona's gender. You didn't have a sex version of popcorn? I don't remember one. Adam, do you? In Omaha, that really didn't take hold there should be sex versions of everything while we're talking about early porno did you guys ever do the scrambled porn or or what did you guys have that of course well do it yeah yeah do it like you know you mean shoot shoot scrambled porn no like did, did you watch it? Yes, obviously. Spice Channel.

Where you eat eggs and watch porn. What? Thank you. Where you could cross your eyes and then, because it would split it down the middle, so it would be like the opposite sides, but if you crossed your eyes, it would line up kind of right. Yep, after like 10 p.m. It'd still be like blurry. Well, I feel like some like, younger people don't even know what

this is. So, back in the day cable there would be like the went off cable turned off there was like it was like channel 300 or something and it was all scrambled porn and it would be like lines through it and you could tell something's going on and every once in a while it would reset and you would get to see some hot hot cinemax porn action but sometimes they were like in like different colors like a light blue or like green or something like that but it was still coming in good enough to to go ahead and and it was weird how like different friends houses got worse or better signals so i remember my friend ryan he got like a great signal

in his basement so it's just like 10 of us, 13 year old boys, just like kicking it in his basement. Just going like, I think I saw one. And to be clear, the audio was just regular. That's true. So you were hearing people fucking. Yep. But you just couldn't see it. Yep.

You knew what the setting was. Like you could hear jail cell doors close and you're like, oh, we're in a jail. Okay. That's, I know what those bars are. It is mad erotic. You know where that's going seven year old you yeah oh yeah oh i hope i know where it's going because i know where i'm going spice channel baby i'm looking up spice channel merch there is the sickest snapback oh tight oh my gosh you need that i might have to cop that the spice channel i remember rocking ahub hat for like a week

and then just being like, nah. Oh, yeah. Spice Channel is way classier. Well, remember when Brassers... Brassers or Brassers? How do they say it? I think it depends if you're from upstate New York or lower state.

Brassers. Yeah, Brassers makes it sound a little fancy. Brassers, the porn site, gave us like a ton of free merch at one point, which was really cool of them. That was before everything. Yeah, that was before workaholics, before anything. We were just doing like, we did like a dumb,

actually pretty funny YouTube video where we were the bang bus, if you guys remember that, where they would just like pull up and meet a chick and then be like, you want to fuck? And then, of of course she did in the porno and then they would in the back and we did it to where we pulled up and then the girl gets in and she's like obviously down and then we're too afraid to make any sort of moves wait hang on no she was not down and we were just like well we're not gonna initiate either oh yeah that's, well, we're not going to initiate either. Oh, yeah, that's true. And then we're like, after as soon as she leaves, we're like, we could have totally banged her. Whoa.

Yeah, you basically just gave her a ride. Once again, satirizing like dumb bro culture. Right. And then Brazzer saw it and was like, hey, these guys need to get merged up. They're flying this porno flag. Yep. Is it safe to say we're the most well-known satirizers yes satirists of our time i a lot of people say that a lot of my uh as as trump always says a lot of my really good

friends say that we are the greatest and best satirizers of all time many many people who is his friend who this is for real who is trump's friend who's that guy's homie that you're like oh yeah he's constantly just gassing him up who's just like yo don you were the you were the greatest smartest giuliani who hannity hannity i i hear that he talks to hannity like fucking hour and a half every day but we're really good friends and i feel like we're very positive with each other and like when something good happens to one of us we're all like hell yeah man good work i'm stoked for you but i've never had one of you like just corner me and been like yo adam you were the most honorable most righteous man of all time honestly dude i was scared to but i just want to say this right here right now

i'll do another time forget it it's cool I thought it was going to happen I just can't and as an apology that I would like to give I would like to say I'm sorry for not gassing you up more I want to be like President Donnie's homeboy who's always gassing him up saying positive ass things to him

giving him the ego that he obviously needed in order to become president i'm trying to get to gas you guys up and be that positive hype man be the hype man yeah yeah be the hype man in your life that that gets you juiced that gets you jazzed and ready to take on the day i would love that yeah go ahead hit us up you're the one of the most honorable men you are my moral compass love Love you, homie. Blake, holy shit, dude. You could be charging this on Cameo.

You bad... No, no. This is all for free. This is OnlyFans. My friend are just a beloved figure and one of the greatest men of all time. Kyle, what's up, dude? What's up? That's what's up. Kyle, you are here, too. You's up? That's what's up.

Kyle, you are here, too. You are also here, dude. Hit me with something. Gas me up. And also with you. Kyle. Kyle, Kyle. Gas me up.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like I said, Blake, love you, dude. You are truly one of the blessed men of the world. Oh, that's nice. And Kyle. Gas me up. Also, you know, do you. You always do you, man.

That's sick. Thank you, bro. Thank you. I'm gassed. I'm so gassed. I'm going to stay me. I'm so gassed. Dude, stay you, dude.

I'm so gassed right now. I'm staying me. Fucking gassed up. I'm gassed, dude. Fuck, I'm gassed. Always going to be me. Oh, I'm ready to run for press. I'm gassed.

Damn, my bro just gassed me up, bro. So does anyone have any takebacks, apologies, or compliments, gang? It's about that time. I got a compliment. It was just a real easy chat today, guys. I know it got kicked off for about two minutes because of Zoom. Stock must be plummeting. But it's good to hear from you guys.

It really is good to hear from you. I'm glad you're safe you know from those fires and um you know keep keep an eye out because that would be i'll admit and i don't know how you guys feel that would be me uh that would that would i'd be pretty peeved if uh you guys all burned alive you and your family i'm gassed up again dog i'm gonna consider that a gas suck yeah i'm gassing you up. Get the hell, gas up the truck and get the hell out of there.

I would like to go ahead and take back the dingleberries. It's, I just could have used a more unique word and been myself rather than using a word. No, I think you were yourself.

I want you to take back that apology. Wait, what? Because you sucking on dingleberries? That's you, Kyle. No, I'm talking about the use of the dingleberry word. I could have come up with a better, like, wing-whammy-flappy. You know what I mean?

Like, something new and fresh. Like, I use dingleberry, and that's where I think. It was too vulgar for our fans. I just think it drew a parallel that people already knew, and it painted me in a corner that I wasn't trying to go, but I did take ownership of it and I rolled with it. Right. It's sucking dingleberries. You know

what I mean? Nice. But was it a satirization? Did you satirize something? As we always do. As we constantly are. My life is a satire. Hey, then it works. Then it works on me. Alright, well I'm gassed. Fucking gassed, dog i'm gassed fucking gas dog gassed that was a take back or an apology just i just need to for the record yeah that

was actually a take back that turned into a non-apology because adam thought that my take back was an apology and so i'd like maybe he wants to take back the fact that he thought it was an apology because it was actually a take back and I would like to compliment you for taking back your apology. Okay. It was not an apology. And also compliment myself for making you compliment your take back. Oh, I want to compliment Adam for gassing me. Alright, that's the final answer.

Anytime. That's on the record. Compliment gas. And that's on the record. Blake, any take backs, apologies, or compliments? You know what? I want to apologize to all the listeners. I keep mentioning the soundboard, and it's my own fault. I feel like I'm lazy. I need to pull some clips, but there will be a lot of,

all righty then, it's coming real soon. Stop them. You can better hope to contain them. Gas me up. Thank you, God. So expect a lot of,, babies coming your way. Next time on This is Important. This is Important.

This is Important. Bye, guys. Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show, which means he's also back in our ears on The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. The Daily Show podcast has everything you need to stay on top of today's news and pop culture. You get hilarious satirical takes on entertainment, politics, sports, and more from Jon and the team of correspondents and contributors. The podcast also has content you can't get anywhere else,

like extended interviews and a roundup of the weekly headlines. Listen to The Daily Show, Ears Edition on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Ed Zitron, host of the Better Offline podcast. I've been both a tech writer and a tech executive for 15 years, and I've seen this industry grow from a bunch of dorks building things in their garage into a multi-trillion dollar behemoth that has monetized every corner of our lives. Better Offline is a podcast where I'll lead you through the good, the bad, and the stupid of the tech industry

and tell you exactly how venture capitalists and technocrat billionaires intend to influence your digital lives. Listen to Better Offline on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever else you get your podcasts. of really exciting guests coming up on Guys We F***ed, including comedians Shane Gillis, Nikki Glaser, Michael Rapaport, and Shea Durena about sex, dating, and relationships. You can even email us for advice about your own romantic life. Listen to the Luminary original podcast Guys We F***ed on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. It's a Wonderful Life is one of the most popular movies ever, but it has more to offer you than you ever thought. Do you know how long it takes a working man to save $5,000?

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