This Is Woman's Work with Nicole Kalil - 002 / Top 3 Reasons to Become an Entrepreneu(HER)

Episode Date: January 23, 2020

Do you have a passion you’ve been wanting to pursue or a purpose calling out to you? Have you been entertaining the idea of what starting your own business might look like? In this episode, Nicole talks openly about the ups and downs she faced starting her own company, gives tips and strategies for those just starting out, and breaks down her top 3 reasons why entrepreneu(HER)ship could be a great opportunity for you! Listen to learn how to work through the doubts or hesitations that may be holding you back. It’s time to be the decider of your OWN worth. Learn more about what we are up to outside of this podcast at NicoleKalil.com

Hi there. I am Nicole Khalil, and together we are going to redefine what it actually means to be doing women's work. On this episode of our podcast, we're going to be talking about what I call work work. This is all the things that we're up to professionally, all the things that we're facing as working women in this world. And today I want to talk about something that's near and dear to my heart, and that is entrepreneurship. What it takes to start your own business, the upside and the downside, and ultimately, why I chose it and why I believe some of you should be choosing it too. Being an entrepreneur is not easy. Frankly, even saying the word is not easy. I don't know why,

but for whatever reason, it doesn't come out of my mouth very well. So I am going to ask for forgiveness in advance if I butcher the word a few times over the course of our conversation. But entrepreneurship is one of the coolest experiences I've ever had. I've worked in more of a corporate environment. I've worked in entrepreneurship, but a little bit more in a franchise type situation. And I've also started my own business twice. And I can tell you, being a business owner, owning my own deal, being an entrepreneur has been one of the most challenging, but ultimately the most rewarding professional experiences I have ever had.

And I certainly know that it is not the right fit for everybody and not every woman. So please don't misinterpret what I'm about to say is trying to encourage you all to quit your jobs and start your own businesses. That would obviously not be a wise decision. And that would make me, I don't know, the worst coach in the world. But I do want to encourage some of you that have already been thinking about this. Maybe you've been thinking for years or for months what it might look like if you went out and started your own business or you went out and chased a passion or lived into a purpose that

has been in your mind. And there's that voice in your head that keeps telling you you should, or you could, but then there's that other voice in your head that says, no, you're not ready, or no, you shouldn't, or other people can do that, just not you. And I want to talk about what it takes to move through that and listen to the good voice and soften and quiet the bad voice so that you can move forward into your calling and move forward into that thing that just is sitting in your brain telling you you should go for it. Okay. So here are the top three reasons why I chose to be an entrepreneur and why I think it is a huge opportunity and such a cool thing for women. First and foremost, entrepreneurship, owning your own business, or even a commission-based, a commission-only type environment is what my dear friend Karen Dry calls the great equalizer. There is no wage gap when you

are running your own business, when you are the determiner of your own worth. You are the decider of your income and your value. And you get to make the calls on your growth trajectory and your own promotions and where you're headed. Being an entrepreneur is the equalizer. You're the decider. You don't have to wait for somebody to recognize your value. You don't have to sit at the end of each year and keep your fingers and your toes crossed that somebody is going to give you a promotion or a raise or a three to six

percent cost of living adjustment if you're really, really lucky or whatever it is that a lot of us are likely sitting around and waiting for other people to decide. I love being the decider of my own worth. That to me was one of the biggest reasons and the biggest callings and also one of the scariest parts of becoming a business owner. And yes, I get that it is scary, but I'm going to walk you through what I went through to really take it in bite-sized chunks, to make it more manageable and minimize the fear as I began to make the decision and enter into building my own business. Side note on that, you also are the keeper of your own culture when you run your own business. So my culture, and I mean this, I'm coming to you live in my pajama bottoms and a professional top because

I have a webinar a little bit later. And so, you know, I need to look professional from the waist up, but I never look professional from the waist down anymore. And that's a lot of fun. And I also get to set up my own environment. My office is basically motivation central. My walls are covered with quotes and pictures and things that are meaningful to me and remind me what's important. So my favorite thing about being an entrepreneur is really that great equalizer. There's no wage gap. I'm the decider of my own worth and I get to create my culture and the environment in which I work out of. And that is so cool for me. And I think it would be really pretty cool for some of you too. The second reason I chose to be an entrepreneur, and I think a lot of women are interested and gravitate towards it, is the flexibility or earned independence of a career like this.

You decide when you're working and when you're not. And yes, there is a lot of work, especially early on. When you start a business, you might be feeling like you're working your face off, but there is a reward or a light at the end of the tunnel. And at the end of the day, you get to decide when you're at work and when you're not. So for me, I drop off JJ at school two days a week and I pick her up two days a week. And so two days a week, I end my days by three o'clock. And two days a week, I don't start my days until 8.30. I don't need to ask anybody permission. If she has a play or something going on at school, I just block out my calendar and I get to be there. I don't have to explain myself or ask for PTO or anything like that. And I love it.

So again, I don't want to misrepresent this. It is a ton of really hard work and there are probably going to be a lot of long hours and late nights, especially early on. But there's a reward or a payoff or even a light at the end of the tunnel because you get to decide when you're working, when you're not, if you want to take a long weekend or if you want to work from another location or work from home. And side note for me, working from home has given me three hours a day of my life back. What would you do with an extra three hours a day? I don't get up, take a shower, do my makeup, blow dry my hair, get everything ready, get in my car, drive a half an hour to the office. I don't have to drive a half an hour home. And I don't get

interrupted constantly throughout my day with somebody knocking on my door saying, do you have a minute? Like I was ever at my office sitting there twiddling my thumbs, just waiting for somebody to swing by, right? So I've calculated that working from home has actually saved me a solid three hours a day. And I also can work out in the timeframe it works best for me. So I work out typically around nine or 9.30 in the mornings, not all mornings, but when I do, that's when I do it. So that leaves me the ability to wake up and focus on JJ in the mornings and get her ready and be present. And then I can go into professional mode and fit in a workout when it works for me, and all of that. So this flexibility is one of the reasons that I love entrepreneurship for women

and for me. The third reason why I think women should really be considering entrepreneurship, specifically at this time in the world, is because of women as a market opportunity. Let me give you some facts. Women drive 70 to 80% of all consumer purchases, according to Forbes, who I believe. That means when it comes time to spending money, making investments, making decisions on where the money is going, women are the driving force of that. So if you think about starting your business or chasing that passion, just know that more than likely your consumers are going to be made up primarily of women. And who can understand them better than you? Who can market to them? Who can attract them?

Who can be relevant and meet the needs of women better than you? The Harvard Business Review says women represent a growth market bigger than China and India combined. Think about that for a second. If we're thinking about a potential client base or customer base or consumer base, women are a huge opportunity. Now, I don't know if your business is going to be focused on marketing to women or women as your average consumer or what have you. But just given whatever it is that you're trying to accomplish, just given that women

are making a lot of these decisions and it's such a huge opportunity, I think it's a game changer for us as we consider making this leap or taking this risk. And I have a belief here that I want to share forward with you. We as women should be supporting each other. We should support our friends and our family members when they decide to do something risky like this. If they go into a commission-based career or start their business or become an entrepreneur, it has been one of the biggest sources of frustration for me in working with so many women, how often I hear, oh, well, my parents don't support this. They think it's a really bad idea. Or my friend is ignoring my phone call. Or they said they aren't even willing to meet with me to find out what I'm

doing. Okay, listen, I'm going to say this with love, but I am going to say it as directly as possible. If your friend or family member starts their own business or takes a big leap to do something risky like this, and you don't support them in some form or fashion, then that just makes you a shitty friend. Did you hear me when I said that? Now, that doesn't mean you have to buy their product or you have to use their service. If what they're doing or what they're selling or how they're providing a service doesn't resonate with you or you already have it or it doesn't work for you, then don't do it. That's not what I'm saying.

But at the very least, get together with them and brainstorm on ways that you can help them. It costs you absolutely nothing to promote them on social media or to introduce them to somebody in your world that may value and benefit from their service or their product. It is our responsibility as women, in my opinion, to support other women. Now, I work with vendors and professionals that are men all the time, but I always make sure I have women in my candidate pool. So if I am looking, for example, this happened last year, I was looking for somebody to help me with my marketing. I probably interviewed four or five women and two or three men. And we ultimately ended up choosing to go with a company that was run by a man because it was the right

choice for me. And it has been the best choice I've ever made. But when given the opportunity, if all things are equal, my preference is to support the woman because I know how hard it is and I know what it takes to do it, to take the risk, to make the leap. And so my ask here is both to look at women as an opportunity, as you might consider starting your own business or becoming an entrepreneur, but also if you're not going to, or even if you do, to support those women who take this chance. We need to be cheerleaders and supporters of the women in our world. So that's both my big ask and also top three reasons why, for those of you who are interested, may want to consider it. Okay. So now let's talk

about how to do it and some advice and some things that I learned by doing it the right way and a lot about what I learned by doing it the wrong way when I stepped down from my more corporate, safe management position that I had prior to starting my own business. Okay. First and foremost, when I was thinking about this, it was so overwhelming. I didn't know how to start, what I was going to do first, what I needed to have set up. And so what I did is I reached out to 23 people who were doing what I wanted to be doing or something similar. So these were entrepreneurs, business owners, in my case, that were in the coaching and consulting roles. But whatever it is that you want to accomplish, I promise you there are people who are out there doing it.

And so I reached out and I talked to 23 of them. I probably reached out to 25 and a couple people said no. And that's how I ended up with 23. And side note here, it was a combination of women and men. I just wanted to pick their brain. So I set up conversations with these people in a 30-minute chunk and I was prepared. I had a list of questions to ask them and I asked them all the questions. I even said things like, now you can say this is none of your business, but I'm just wondering, what do you charge for your service? Or what service of yours provides the most revenue? I also ask questions like, in hindsight, what would you have done differently? What did you learn by doing that you wish you could go back and tell yourself when you

started out? Asking all of these questions gave me so much insight. I was able to see themes and commonalities of things that worked, and I was able to get really good advice and really learn from other people's mistakes. And that was awesome for me. Another outcome of this is I started realizing that I was making this scarier and bigger in my head than it needed to be. After having these conversations, sure, some parts of it still felt scary and some parts of it still felt really overwhelming. But in having

these conversations, I began to have the feeling if these people can do it, I can too. And I don't mean this as a knock at all, but there wasn't anything that they were saying that seemed insurmountable, or there wasn't anything that I was observing where I was like, they have some skill or quality that I cannot possess. And so it became a little bit more manageable in my mind. Side note on this, if you reach out to people and ask for their advice, always be respectful of their time. Make sure you're prepared with questions and don't get your feelings hurt if they don't have the time to set aside. A lot of people in roles like this are getting requests and emails and calls of this nature on a pretty

regular basis. So they're not always in a position where they can set aside that time. I'll give you one example. I reached out to somebody who was the most successful coach and consultant that I knew. And when I called him, he was very friendly and very engaging and super supportive. But he said at this point in time, in order to be fair to his clients, which makes perfect sense, if I wanted to pick his brain, I would have to pay for his time. And this guy is super successful. I had to pay $1,000 to get a half an hour time with him. And you bet your butt, I was as prepared as I could possibly be for that half an hour. I had all my questions listed out. And I got to tell you, it was the best investment I ever made.

He gave me a couple amazing ideas. One of them, which has generated more than six figures of income for me to date. So I'm not saying that you should pay everybody for their time and you might not be in a position where you can make that kind of investment, but when it makes sense, when you think the investment is worth it, I would encourage you to take advantage. Another thing that was really important for me as I began to think about doing this, so I did these conversations and this next exercise before I even stepped out of my current safe position. The second thing I would encourage you to do is plan out your finances. So what this looked like for me as I got together

with Jay and we went through what our current finances were, and we talked about all the areas we could cut back our finances so that we didn't have the financial pressure and that I didn't feel guilty for taking this risk. And we cut it all out, like all the things that we could. Obviously, we still paid our mortgage and, you know, had food on the table and, you know, all the fun stuff. But we in that particular year didn't do our big vacations. We're more conscious of cost and finances when it came to, uh, you know, our trips and the things that we did in that year. We also knocked out anything that could be considered frivolous. And then we basically got down to, okay, this is our budget and this is what Jay

brings into the household. And we had a conversation. In that year, could he bring a little bit more into the household? Or were there other ways that income could be generated in the meantime that would help offset some of the risk. And then what it ultimately came down to is I knew that there was a number that I was responsible for bringing into the household. And I knew what that number was. And then I sat down and I thought, okay, if I charge this per service, or if you charge that per product or whatever it is, how many of those do I need to do a month in order to generate the monthly nut that I need to contribute to my household? And it provided some perspective and it gave me a driving force. Like I set up a tracking sheet with the number that I needed minus what I thought I could get and then what I needed to

generate in the interim. And here's what I knew. I knew month one, I was not going to generate the income that I needed. And probably not month two or month three, but I knew I could generate some income. And so let's just for argument's sake, say your number is $4,000 a month. Let's say you must bring $4,000 a month into the household and you do your tracking sheet and you say, okay, I can see how I can bring in $1,500. I can see how I can do that. So I'm going to be $2,500 short in month one. And so I made sure I had a savings account of about three to six months of whatever that monthly nut was. And I knew that I wasn't going to take that, in this example, $4,000 out each month because I was going to generate some revenue. But I wanted that to be there to just buy me time to build. And again, so I didn't feel the pressure and the guilt.

I would also encourage you to identify any potential transition opportunities. What this looked like for me is I knew my organization could still use my services. And my managing partner was totally involved in these conversations and he was super supportive, but we were able to identify that when I started my business, I could still work for him a certain amount of hours a month. And that created a little bit of a transition opportunity. And again, released the pressure valve and some of the fear that I was feeling at the time. What are your transition opportunities? Is it continue to work with your old company or some other company in that field on a part-time basis? Could it be

getting a small part-time job? Could it be doing some things that generate some revenue but are outside the scope of your business or the thing that you're trying to create? Okay. Then the next thing I did, it was, I began to communicate with people. And this is important because it's really good practice. I practiced my pitch. I practiced sharing my mission. I practiced sharing my services. And I did that, I don't know, gosh, maybe 20 people, friends, close colleagues, people that I trusted and who knew I was at the early phases of my business building journey. And I knew they'd be generous with me.

And I also knew that they would give me really good feedback and they'd come from a place of caring. And so I had these conversations and I began to communicate about my business and what I was trying to accomplish. And I got so many good ideas. People would say, you know, I really like this, but could you do it in this way? And of course my response was, of course I can. And it would just create one idea after another. Now there are some things that you may need to get in place prior to starting your business, like a business email or potentially a website or a financial tracking sheet or whatever. But I would also

encourage you to be careful that you don't go overboard, that you don't try to get everything in place. So I'll give you an example. I put together a marketing piece that was a list of all of the services that I could provide pretty early on in my business. And I spent some money doing it. I had a friend do it. So he gave me the friend and family discount, which I'm super appreciative of. And he put together this phenomenal resource for me. But I think I used it maybe three times because by the time I'd had all these conversations, my ideas and what I would charge had evolved and changed from when I created that marketing piece.

So I guess my point here is you want to have some things in place, but separate what you need to have from what you think you need to have, from what you want to have, and just get going. Another thing that falls under the communication thing here is check in with your close friends and family members. Ask if they're willing to have a phone call with you or meet with you and brainstorm on how they could best support you, whether it's using your product or service or promoting you on social media, or introducing you to people who do need your service or your product. Getting people on your team will not only help your business take off at a faster rate and

be more profitable, but it'll also be more fun. You'll also feel safer because you have a team of people surrounding you, cheering you on, supporting you, lifting you up, and it's so important. Okay, and then two pieces of advice that I learned sort of the hard way. Number one, leverage and outsource where you can. One of the hard things about being an entrepreneur or new business owner is you don't have all the resources in-house that you might have had if you were working in a corporate job. For example, there is no technology guru or marketing person or HR department or whatever. And so being mindful to think about leveraging and outsourcing where you can. This was a huge mistake that I made. I tried to do it all myself. So I'll give you an example. I set up my own email.

Now, I think I've said this before, but I am the least tech savvy person there is. It's embarrassing how bad I am with technology. My old technology coach in my old office would hide from my office because he knew I was always going to have some sort of technology issue. And it's funny because I don't even use it to its fullest. I don't know what I'm doing wrong. But anyway, it took me, no exaggeration, I'm embarrassed to admit this, 10 hours probably to set up my email address because I had to research and find all the different domains and then find my domain name and then figure out how to set it up and then get it on Google. And I just messed it all up. And then I'd made all these mistakes. So it's to spend time fixing those mistakes. And that 10 hours could have been

more effectively spent trying to generate business. And I'm quite certain I probably could have found somebody in my life, like a millennial with super technology skills that would have been willing to set it up for me for like 50 bucks. So this is an example of thinking outside the box and leveraging and outsourcing where you can. Another thing here is to consider making trades with people. There are people out there who are doing really cool things who might have use for your service or your product. So again, in my world, I was doing executive coaching. Well, guess what? A lot of people who do graphic design or website development or technology support or marketing and branding, a lot of them are business owners and entrepreneurs too.

And I probably could have reached out to some of them and said, hey, would you make a trade? I'll coach you on a monthly basis on business building and executive development if you provide this service or somebody on your team provides the service. I promise you I could find people willing to do that. I just wasn't thinking outside of the box. The second piece of advice that I would tell you is to charge what you're worth. In those initial conversations with other people who are doing what you want to be doing, ask what they charge and how they charge it, and then pick your number. And my thing is to pick a number probably somewhere in the middle. Don't pick the lowest number. You're probably not in a position to pick the highest number, but pick your number and then

communicate it clearly and with confidence. I know in working with women, when we don't feel confident, we have a tendency to sort of over explain ourselves. So we might do something like this. My rate for this is $300. And here's all the value that you're going to get. And here's all the outcomes that you're going to just shut up. My rate for this is $300, period. End of sentence. And then see how they react. Some people are like, great. And then you're like, yay, that worked. Some people will be like, oh, gosh, that was a little bit outside of what I was thinking. Okay, well, what were you thinking? I was thinking $200. All right. I have two suggestions for you. We could either, solution number A, split the difference and start at $250. How would you feel about that?

Or we can be, I can, as an introductory rate, I can charge you $200 a month for three months. And at the three-month mark, if you're getting the value and the support and the ideas and the results that you were hoping to get when you signed up in the first place, then we'll move it to my rate of $300. If you're not, then we can end our agreement there. How do you feel about that? And so this may not work in your business idea or as you become an entrepreneur, but I'm hoping the concept will help you. Decide what you're worth, speak it with confidence, don't explain, and then negotiate if necessary. But don't automatically take the number they're willing to pay. 9.9 times out of 10, people are willing to negotiate,

and you will always come out better on the other side than if you took the first number they gave you. Okay, I have lots more ideas on this subject, but I'm hoping this is a good starting point, a good grounding point for some of you that might be considering or might have already made the leap to start your own business or go the entrepreneurial route. I know it is not for everyone, and I'm not trying to encourage all of you to do it. But some of you have been thinking about this for a long time. And here's what I know. You won't ever be 100% ready. I have a quote hanging in my office. This is a general theme. You're going to hear it a lot. But it says she was never quite ready, but she was brave. And the universe listens to brave. And everything in my experience, all the evidence in my life up to this point

supports that. So you will never be ready, but jump anyway. And here's another thing I know. It will be a bit of an emotional roller coaster. So make sure you're strapped on and that you're on the ride with other people who will scream with you and laugh with you and have fun with you. You don't have to go it alone. And here's my last promise. You will fail in small and big ways.

But in every time you fail, you have the choice to fail forward, to learn, to grow, and to get better the next time around. And you will if you focus on it in that way. And here's my last question. If you're not willing to bet on you, who will? Ladies, the world is begging for more women in leadership. The world is begging for more women to take risk and bet on themselves. I, as always, will be cheering for you. And if I can be of support, connect with us on NicoleKhalil.com and let us know what you're thinking and how we can support and how we can

promote. Because here's the deal. Owning your own business, being an entrepreneur is most certainly woman's work.