This Paranormal Life - Man Discovers Strange Alien Implant in His Arm

Episode Date: March 17, 2026

When Tim Cullen went to the doctor for a simple x-ray in 1998, he discovered something unbelievable - there was a strange metal object implanted in his arm - Tim had no idea what the object was or how it got there… but he immediately began to suspect that it had something to do with the strange visions he experienced 20 years ago. Support us on ⁠⁠Patreon.com/ThisParanormalLife⁠⁠ to get access to weekly bonus episodes! Follow us on ⁠⁠⁠Twitter⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Join our Secret Society Facebook Community⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Buy Official TPL Merch!⁠⁠ Edited by Philip Shacklady Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today on the podcast, we're going to talk about an x-ray that was done on a man called Tim Cullen, 26 years ago. That x-ray revealed something that Tim simply couldn't believe, that there was something metal implanted in his arm. But how did this piece of metal get there? Could it have something to do with the strange visions he experienced 20 years ago? If my doctor x-rayed me, would they be able to tell if I have a boner? All of these questions you can find the answer to on this paranoia. Hello everybody and welcome back to This Paranormal Life, the comedy paranormal podcast where every week, myself Roy Powers and my co-host Kit Greer Malvena investigate a brand new paranormal tale

and come to a conclusion to decide whether or not it really is paranormal. The answer is no, by the way. Doctor, in theory, wouldn't be able to tell if you had a boner, unless you told them. Is that true? Because humans have no penile bone. which is funny because we call it a boner, ironically, no bones involved. I think we're one of the only mammals of kind of our size and bigger that don't have any bone in the dick region. Sorry, I was quite scientific until that point, but yeah. Any questions? This is me explaining to someone why I can't get hard.

There's actually no penile bone in it, so it's not supposed to go that way. It is a little bit of a biological mystery because if we had a bone down there, We wouldn't need our sponsor today, Blue Choo. No, we don't have a sponsor from Bluchu. But, you know. Well, there you go. He might be able to see the soft tissue through the X-ray, but we're getting into the weeds. That's not what we're here to investigate.

You're not here to investigate that. Today, we have a great paranormal story. As you can tell from our little intro, one that might be dealing a little bit with... Dailing. They might be dealing with some pretty interesting stuff. Might be daling with some alien. encounters is what I'm going to say today. Let's just dive into today's case. Our story today kicks off back in 1978 in Yuma, Colorado, a small town about 150 miles outside Denver. Now Yuma was like

any other town in the mountain west, home to corn, pigs, and a ton of cattle. But as we know on this podcast, where there's cattle, there's cattle mutilations. Hulu on Disney Plus. Stories about survivors. The most dangerous planet. Family, retribution. Murder. Prophecy.

Beer and propane. Alternate soldier. Chicago, all right. The best of the best stories now with even more from Hulu. Amazing. Have it all with BU on Disney Plus. It's late on April 9th. And Yuma local Tim Cullen was sleeping peacefully in his bed

with his then pregnant wife, Janet. Now, Tim was a hardworking cement contractor. That's the kind of job where you want to make sure you get a good night's sleep. But in the middle of the night, Tim began to shuffle. Yeah. Reh. Rezzle. Ah!

He leapt awake! Sorry, I think we're going to need to reset the mics after that. Not to wake. Incredibly lies. In a cold sweat. You never wake up from a nightmare before? you were not screaming. Really?

Do you? Is that a regular occurrence? It's kind of how I wake up most mornings. Right. Just remembering that I exist in this world. I actually, try to put him on blast, but I actually called my brother the other morning. And I was like, did I just, you know what you can kind of tell?

I was like, did I just wake you up? You sound groggy. Yeah. I was like, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake you up. And he was like, it's fine. You only interrupted the nightmares. So that was, that's, that's,

actually a relief to be conscious. I have to thank you actually. It's like getting, it's like getting a call in the Matrix, the hard line goes off. He's like, thank God, someone pulled me out, you know. It was like when they play the classical music in Inception, he remembered it wasn't the real world. He was able to be brought back to reality. He's, he's in the middle of a table ladders, chairs match in WWE, the rock is about to tombstone him through a table. Then I'm like, hello. Whoa! Yeah, look, Tim apparently wasn't having good dreams, but he woke up immediately in the night. His wife asked.

What's wrong, honey? I dreamt I was driving down some long road, and all of a sudden the car flipped. I could feel it rolling and rolling. Eventually it stopped, but the dream kept going. I saw a hospital and an emergency room. It was all so real. Tim's wife comforted him, assuring him it was just a dream. So he fell back to sleep and tried to push the vivid images out of his mind.

Now one week later, Tim had completely forgotten about his dream. He was with his buddy, Ken Ruberg, and they were driving down Highway 34 late at night. You can't be a cement contractor forever, Tim. Of course I can. People will never stop building things. What are they gonna use? Straw? Sticks? Then you hear about those three little pigs? Hey, pass me a smoke, would you? Tim reached down to grab up.

Tim reached down to grab a pack of smokes, but suddenly everything started to feel familiar, the smell of the cigarettes, the dark stretching road, the fact that he wasn't wearing a seatbelt. Tim's face turned ice white. He was living out his dream and not in the kind of manifesting my dream life type of way. More like a living nightmare where he's seen all of this before. Right. He went ice white. He realized he dreamt this.

all as a boy, kicking back with your bud, highway 34 fresh back smokes. Yeah, I like to think that he tried to warn Ken and he's just like, goes ice white and he just goes, I'm living the dream. And Ken's like, hell yeah, brother, we both are. Give me one of those, them there, Cors lights. Woo-hoo! Let's see if we can hit a hundred. It's like, no, no. It's actually great to hear you say that, bud, because I, I thought you were in a really dark place for a moment.

Everyone's been worrying about you, but to hear you're living your dream is honestly totally reassuring. No, instead, Ken said, Hey Tim, it's getting kind of dark. Maybe we should pull off. But Ken couldn't finish the sentence. Tim lost control of the car. It swerved across the road and flipped off the highway,

rolling and rolling down into a nearby ditch. When the dust had settled, the two men lay motionless in the wreckage. Tim's neck had broken on the first. flip. Jesus. You weren't kidding about the seatbelt. Shouldn't laugh.

And it's bad when your neck breaks on the first flip and you know from the dream, you got six more flips. That sucks. In for a penny. In for a point. It might break back in the right place. Snap it back. Snap wrong.

I guess once I started talking, I was like, I guess there's no way to snap it right again. Yeah. Yeah. If you ever think your neck is broken, don't try and snap it back into position. I don't think it works like that. Yeah, although chiropractors seem to believe otherwise, but anyway. Tim was in such a state that Ken actually had to pull him out of the wreckage. The two men then managed to limp onto the highway and wave down a passing car that managed to take them to the nearest hospital.

When they entered the hospital, Tim couldn't believe what he was seeing. I've been here in my dreams. I've seen it all before. They managed to get Tim into a bed, pumped him full of morphine, and he stared up at the hospital lights above him as he drifted off into sleep once again. Then he saw another light. A couple of them. They were dim and hazy, but slowly getting more clear. Tim was staring up at an enormous UFO. Whoa.

Let me tell you, as a guy who just had a dream that came true about a week ago, this isn't the kind of dream you want to be having next. Now, I understand that today's story is kind of taking a kind of Tarantino-esque back to front, front-to-back type of energy. We're seeing that we get the premonition. He has the dream. He wakes up in the cold sweat. The dream starts happening.

He's on kind of the operating table. But now he's looking at a UFO. Just to be absolutely clear, this story is coming to us via man who had the concussion to end all concussions. I mean, he's so. Sure, yeah. Which, you know, I just want everyone to remember that the first dream happened before the six flips. Mm-hmm. The first premonition happened before the six flips.

Yeah, but I'm saying that, you know, sure, but the story he's presumably survived to tell, which we're in our reading today. Yeah. He told people that after the clips. After the crash, for sure. After the snap. Yeah. He was able to go back and kind of, kind of put the story together. Yeah.

Listen, there's a lot. to this story. Tim is someone who has had strange encounters for most of his life, and we are at the beginning of that journey. Yeah. So don't worry. Right now, all of his strange encounters seem to be happening through his dreams and through these premonitions. It seems like Tim has some ability to dream and then the dreams come true, which is something that we talked about on the podcast before. It's a phenomenon known as where an individual has a dream, where they see something in the future, and then they realize later on in life that they're living their dream, which in Tim's case, that's a very difficult thing to experience.

Yeah. This is the equivalent of having a dream one day that you're eating a cream cheese bagel. And then the next day at work, someone comes in and he's like, hey, guess what guy's treat this week? I have cream cheese bagels. And you're like, oh my God, this is amazing. in. I think I can tell the future in my dreams. My dreams are coming true. And then that night, you go to sleep and the doctor is telling you that there's no way to save your penis after the

explosion. That's bad. That's bad for sure. I'm going to stop going to fireworks displays. Yeah. You know, if it's the Fourth of July is coming up, I ain't going to be at the barbecue. Because the penis dream is next. Yeah. I might never sleep again. I don't know if what we've just, the picture we've painted has actually helped anyone understand, but I feel slightly more informed. That's fine. Okay. Yeah, I'm not sure if that analogy helped. But, you know, he had one dream. It came true. His next dream is him seeing a UFO. Can you imagine what's going to happen next? Okay, but this is a dream. Right. He's woken up. Yes. This is a morphine-induced concussion dream. Okay. All right. And I can say that on the record. I'm happy to say that.

Okay. Well, two months later in May, 1978, Tim and his wife Janet, who was a nurse, was driving home from a medical checkup, seeing as now Janet was five months pregnant with their first child. It was 11 p.m., so the couple were eager to get home and get to bed. But the universe had other plans. Out of the corner of his eye, Tim spotted the glow of a dimly lit object floating across the horizon in front of the car. Before he could get a better look at whatever. whatever this thing was.

It ducked down behind a low hill. Tim slowed the car to a stop. I assume at this point he was praying. This thing was an aeroplane or a satellite. But when it reemerged, it was so low, it passed underneath the telephone power lines and hovered over a field just west of the highway. Whoa.

Tim quickly got back on the road. He didn't know what this thing was, but he wasn't planning on sticking around to find out. The couple continued to gun it down the road. But it was as if this thing was following them. Tim glanced in his mirror and now he could see it clear as day. The thing was huge. When interviewed later, he said,

It was about a hundred foot long and 20 foot wide. It didn't make any noise. There were two diffused lights that shone at the back of the craft. One light yellow, the other one red. Tim and Janet decided that the best thing they could do was to keep driving towards home. But as they did, Tim recalls being overwhelmed by a strange sensation, an odd feeling that flowed through his body.

When the couple arrived home, they stumbled in through the front door, still in shock of what they'd just seen. What they really should have done was check the clock, because if they had, they would have realized that they had experienced the classic extraterrestrial phenomenon known as Missing Time. But look, Kit, I know that this is hard to believe. It's a pretty wild story. So how about instead of me telling you about it,

why don't you hear it from Tim himself? Love it. Let's do it. We were coming back one night, it was evening, late night, probably 11 o'clock or so. Coming here, Highway 59, and we encountered a miscraft in front of them. It looked like it was about a hundred foot long. It looked like a cigar.

There was some lights on it. Tim stops for a better view. Whatever it is, moves like nothing on earth. It crossed the road, crossed over the road, road crossed over the fence and under the telephone lines and the next thing you know bingo it's kind of by the car and it's back up here and my wife and I sat there and two lights came on that really bright because like saying my preview vision kind of gone time seems to stand still for Tim and his wife after the lights

came on and my wife and I were sitting there in the car for what I perceive is a four or five minutes it was a mind-bending experience for me at the time We sat there wondering what to do, you know, thinking about it, and then I looked at the wife and said, let's go. Yeah, he's really going for it. Yeah. And the kind of screaming scenes showing him. Like, he wasn't, well, we don't know if he's abducted yet, but. Yeah, I'm glad the kit wasn't thrown by the reveal of Big Tim as a person, because as soon as it cuts to him in the interview room, he is wearing an alien t-shirt and overalls with alien heads all down.

Yeah, britches or whatever. So this isn't, I think this is someone, it's an alien baseball cap. Yeah. This is someone who's really embraced his relationship with these creatures. I don't think he seems too traumatized from the encounter, despite the very dramatic reenactment. Well, at this point, Tim was aware of a disturbing pattern. The things in his dreams were coming true. As I said, we talked about this before in the podcast, Deja Reve.

Unfortunately, today's instance is Deja Reve. with alien encounters. Yeah. The bad news is that Tim might have just had one UFO experience, that doesn't mean the alien encounters were over. In fact, just two years later, Tim was driving through the very same spot where he and his wife had witnessed the strange lights, and they appeared again, floating above him in the night sky.

Then, again, in 1994. This time Tim was driving with his wife and three daughters. daughters. That happened fast. When they spotted a strange craft with strobing lights, around 40 miles south of Yuma. Tim, when interviewed, said, It hovered off the road in front of us, and we stopped and looked at it for five to ten minutes. The girls seemed mystified by it, but they were younger. I don't really think they realized the enormity of what they were seeing. You know, you mentioned on a recent podcast, something to the effect of, you know, sometimes people who start a family wonder about the, I suppose you maybe wonder

about your own mortality. Do I want to bring children into this world, into a world that someday I won't be able to look after them? Maybe a world that will be ravaged by climate change and ecological destruction. Most people, you know, they have these thoughts, but then they move on and go, you know, well, well, this is the beautiful unbroken circle of life, which I must continue and I'll have kids anyway. This guy should have thought about it. Because at the start of this story, They were pregnant for what feels like the first time. But it's like, I will say bringing children into a family which are haunted by aliens is slightly irresponsible. It's like, you know, kids, I'm going to do my damnedest to look after.

I'm going to work tirelessly every day down at the cement factory. We will get abducted a couple times a year. But think of it as a family holiday. Sometimes daddy will be gone. Yeah. Sometimes daddy will be gone for a while. Yeah. Was your father around when you were younger?

Most of the time. lose the time. I love that if Janet's like, you know, Tim, I'm just not sure that we're ready to have kids. Don't worry, baby. If anything bad will happen, the dreams will warn me. All right, well, it's sentences like that that make me feel like there's too much going on that we shouldn't have kids. Yeah.

Don't worry, the visions will protect us. Shouldn't be saying that before you have a kid. What the fuck is happening? in this story. Bro. First of all, Tim Cullen predicts the future in his dreams, then all of a sudden he's repeatedly visited by aliens? Are these events linked?

If so, why? What happened during the missing time in 1978? Tim didn't know it at the time, but he was going to get some answers to his questions. However, he would have to wait 20 years. In 1998, exactly 20 years after his first UFO encounter. Tim was working on a construction site, hammering away as he installed some grating. In a moment of clumsiness, Tim accidentally hammered his own thumb. Ah, classic.

Oh, God damn it! All right, Tim! Yeah, yeah, I just hit myself with a stupid goddamn hammer. In typical guy fashion, despite the blinding pain, Tim refused to go to the hospital and instead left the healing to the greatest nurse in the universe. Mother time. But even Mother Time was having a hard time healing this one. Tim started to notice the pain wasn't going away,

which led him to believe that it might in fact be dislocated. Yeah, you've broken it. As a man who, you know, I'm not proud of it. I also do this. There is, there would have to be an incredible amount of pain coursing through my body to finally decide to drag myself to the hospital. If it was really bad, I would have dreamt about it. I would have had the dreams

where they're just lowering my casket into the ground. I've had a few of those where they're lowering my casket into the ground and I'm like, all right, I'll go to the dentist. Fine. It's obviously worse than I thought. So how did you? Yeah. What? All right. I'll go let them scan the lump.

Fine. Because I had the coffin dream again. Like as, yeah, like a lump is genuinely kind of boring. But it wasn't anywhere weird. It was just, it was my nuts. Did you have an abscess or something that was, how did you have had something so wrong with a tooth that you dreamed about dying every night? The tooth was telling me to do things.

And it won't tell me to floss, brother. I won't tell you what it was telling me to do. Had a few things say about you, actually. But remember those fires in East London where no one caught the guy? Feed me Harrybow, Oray, or else the dreams will restart. Please, tooth, no, let me eat a salad. Now, silence.

I want lucky charms. Only tagfastics will please the Dark Lord. The pain was bad and it wasn't going away, so Tim swallowed his pride and he headed into the hospital for an x-ray. After a few scans, Tim was brought into a small room. and sat down by the doctor. Well, your thumb took quite a hammering, but it should be fine. The real question is, and I don't quite know how to ask this,

but do you know you have a piece of metal in your arm? Tim was stunned. The doctor showed him the x-ray, and there it was, clear as day. Tim says at that moment, everything came rushing back. The first UFO sighting. the missing time. He knew exactly what this mysterious piece of metal was. They might not have realized it in the moment.

But Tim knew the object had been inserted into his arm the night that he and his wife experienced missing time. I actually have a photo of the x-ray here, if you want to see this piece of metal in his arm. Let's see it. That's right. Your boys are bringing some real evidence to the case today. There's one picture and then there's one below.

Here's a Looney Tunes Anvil. Stuck inside his... What am I looking at? Where is it? Right there. That's not a great response, is it? That's not what your boy wants to hear when I show him the x-ray. What the tiny fleck of white on his tibula or whatever the bone is? Well, they didn't slip an iPhone 6 in there.

It's a Tick-Tac. It's really small. It is small. You know, there's one key word in the phrase microchip. It ain't a macrochip, brother. It's tiny. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I see it. Okay, there's something there. Number two. Just, hey, look, as a guy, as a guy who looks at, you know, photo film negatives, you know, from time to time, this to me is dust. But I understand I'm not looking at a photo negative. I'm looking at an x-ray. I understand this is bigger than that. Yeah.

So, yeah, so I have to wrap my head around it. But no, there is something there, for show. I mean, x-rays are one of those things where it's like, when you're, you know, When you x-ray a human body, you should know what you're going to get back. Flesh and bone. And that's pretty much it. So it is weird when you see an x-ray and there is something just a dot of pure white that the x-ray hasn't penetrated.

That clearly you can see how strange it is to see that alongside just bones. Yeah, sure. It's pretty weird. Now this discovery changed Tim's life forever. Despite seeing UFOs multiple times over the years, he'd always tried to brush it off and not let it affect his personal life. But knowing now that he had been chipped and presumably tracked by these beings changed. Well, hey, hold on. So did the doctor agree that it was a microchip?

Did the doctor have any thoughts on this whole situation? It's still in his body. It's still in his body. So at this point, they're just like there's metal in your arm. we don't know where it came from. Well, do they even know it's metal? Do they? I don't know.

I think they do. I think they do. That's what the doctor said. I'm just, you know, I'm just saying it's a little bit of a... The doctor didn't say, are you aware you of an alien tracking device implanted into your forearm? I just wonder if the doctor said, it almost looks like, you know, maybe the doctor said, you know, did you have a surgery I didn't know about it? Is there like a, you know, is there like a screw, you know, did you break your arm or something?

And it had to screw the bone back together? You know, it looks a little bit like a metal screw in there. And he went, oh, my God, it's an alien microchip of plant in 1979. I just think, you know. I just think it's a great start to try to prove the existence of an alien microchip. I'm someone who's very aware every day of what's inside of my body. It's blood, it's bones, two paracetamol and a Diet Coke. That's most of the day.

That's brunch. So, if someone says, oh, by the way, do you know that there is a, there is a micro trip in your arm? That would freak me out. And if I'd known I'd been abducted

all of my life or had seen UFOs, I'm going to put those two things together. The two weirdest things that have ever happened to me, I'm going to think that they're related somehow. Yeah. I think that's a safe assumption.

Yeah. I also think it didn't take Tim much to like follow down this path. Sure. He was maybe looking for that final thing. He was like, look, I've seen a UFO a couple times, but people don't believe me. I don't know.

Maybe I should just be normal and try and move past it. And then the doctor's like, there is metal implanted in your arm. And he's like, that's it. All right, then, that's it. I'm done. This is going to be my whole thing now. Yeah. You know?

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Canada's suicide crisis helpline. It's good to know. No, just in case. Anyone can call or text for free confidential support from a train responder anytime. 9-88 suicide crisis helpline is funded by the government in Canada. Maybe the scariest sentence in this whole episode. Tim started doing his own research. Stumbling down an internet rabbit hole, researching UFOs, abductions, and alien implants.

Eventually, that research led him to a man in California named Dr. Roger K. Lear. Now, Dr. Roger was apparently in the business of removing alien implants, which is a pretty niche area of employment. I don't know how... That makes sense he's in California, doesn't it? He's not in Nevada. He's not in Arizona. He's in California. It's like in between being cast in sitcoms, he works as a surgeon removing alien implants. On February 5th in the year 2000, so recently, Tim Met, with Dr. Roger K. Lear to have his implant surgically removed. And what they discovered shocked all three men.

The doctor decides to operate, but during the surgery, something extraordinary happens. They were doing the surgery, and I got to watch it on a photoscope. As the doctor got ready to remove the object, when he got close to it, it seemed to move away from the force that he was going to remove the objects with. Like the object sensed that it was going to be removed. They finally got a whole... but now that's when my arm really got to hurt and got it drawn up near the surface and put the snip on it and took it loose.

As the doctor examines the object, he realizes why it reacted strangely. Inside a membrane is a core of metal. There are also pro-preoceptors, wire-like appendages that seem to be connected to nerve endings leading to his hand. There was no anti-rejection structures around the whole object at all. The body doesn't even know it's there. I mean, it's metal. And nothing more foreign to the body than metal.

What the fuck? There's a lot to break down in that clip. It's hard to watch. Yeah. We need a trigger warning on that shit. Yeah, if you're listening, maybe be... We just watch the entire surgery take place in 4K. They filmed the surgeries.

You can see them going in and trying to grab this bit of metal from his arm. Yeah. We might have to blur a little bit of that. That's good TV, though. Yeah. So first off, the claim that Tim said was that when they win, in to grab it. The little chip started dodging. Yeah, yeah. It started moving around trying not to be picked up. It's like trying to find something down the back of a sofa. It might have

moved around a little bit. Okay. Yeah. Whatever. Whatever. They get the thing out. It looked like they had to cut it out, which is horrible. And they put it down on the table. And as they move the tongs around the object, it almost moves like a magnet. Like there's something in it that's like that pulls it in a weird way without it actually being touched. I don't know if you caught that. I didn't see. What are you talking about? You just sound like you're agreeing with him now.

No, okay. You're like, I wouldn't say it knows, but when they tried to touch it, it moved of its own accord. It's definitely alive. You saw it levitating, right? I saw it glowing. I don't know if it can speak, but it definitely has feelings. You know, that's all I'll say. The only thing that's really worrying about this particular part of evidence is.

is that, I don't know if you notice kit, they jump between videos of this surgery labeled actual footage and then the actual footage label disappears. And the cut between them is so disorientating. It is, I don't know what is actual footage and what is the reenactment. So like this, we're going to have to blur that. That's a lot of blood. Right. Actual video. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Right. Oh, yeah. we see it from afar, got it. The actual video label's gone. That makes sense. That's a reconstruction. Actual video. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's quite far away. That is, yeah, that's it. The chip moving is actual video, apparently. But now we have a close-up of the thing. But now there's a close-up where it looks a little bit like a ladybug or some kind of creepy bug. It looks a lot like a ladybug. It genuinely- But you're saying-

Well, shit, it actually might be a ladybug. I'm looking at this. That is straight up a ladybug. I mean, how'd that get in there? But yeah. But then at that point, yeah, the, the, they've stopped flagging it as actual footage. But hey, there must have been,

there must be photos that go along with all this documentation. The photos of it are kind of what you, what you see when it's placed down. It's just like showing it as like a nugget of, you know, that. Yeah. Which looks kind of similar. It looks like a, it's referred to as a melon seed implant.

Yeah. So it's kind of like a very small oval like, piece of metal. Yeah, it looks like a tumor from there, though, because it's covered in tissue. He says it's covered in tissue. Yeah. Yeah, he said there was a metal core, but it was covered in tissue. Yeah, it's described by Tim and the doctors as being a red-brown membrane-type metal core connected to nerve endings. I don't know what to do with that. And before, Before you ask, the object has, as of now, not been sent off for proper scientific analysis, even though this was 26 years ago.

The last word I can find on it was that, quote, an appropriate laboratory is being sought as our funds for performing various tests. I need to see the medal. I need to, because that looks like tissue. That looks like a little tumor. that looks like a little nodule, something that would just organically be inside an arm, and then now they're just telling us it,

oh, but it was metal at its core. Yeah. Okay, cool, but no photo, no video of the metal. And then the surgeon, to be clear, is, oh, he's a quack. Great. Sorry, not quack. But he's a guy who professionally removes alien objects from bodies. I didn't know Tim Cullen went to Disneyland,

Because this doctor's a quack. Even if I search Tim Cullen implant X-ray, alien abduction, the only results you get back frustratingly are of the X-ray. Like here's one photo that maybe could be the implant. Or there's like a f*** coffee bean. Yeah, it's so hard to tell. There really isn't a ton of, I mean, I've seen that photo a few times,

so maybe that's it, this little nugget of dark that was inside of his arm allegedly. You know, I guess it just goes to show how one can become convinced. Now, in this case, to his credit, by an x-ray, by a real x-ray, but one could become convinced that something found inside their body, which is kind of natural or just there's a mundane explanation for, would be of supernatural origin. That is a good point that you bring up, though, is this was not brought to the attention

of doctors by Tim. This was brought to the attention to Tim by doctors. Yeah. You know? So I think that does at least give this story some credit, is this isn't a man slowly losing his mind. He's trying desperately to hold on to his mind. He's driving home from work every night,

keeping his eyes down as UFO circle him like sharks. And then he goes to the doctor because he hurt his thumb, and they're like, there's a Ford Fiesta in your ass. He's like, I don't know. Have you noticed that? He's like, I don't know how it got there. I just want a normal life. I don't know what to tell you

there's a small family coupé it's parallel parked inside your cranium Did you know your colon is a metal slinky Did you know Are you aware? No, I'm not aware of that I would have brought that up to you In this appointment

You know why some people say they have an iron gut Well your tummy is made of aluminium That's there's no other way to say it You have the black box from Malaysian Flight 370 in your appendix. Tim Cullen walks in a hospital like the f*** tin man from Wizard of Oz. Look, I just wanted to pick you up on something you said, which was initially correct. This was brought to his attention by a doctor. I will say maybe telling that he had to then in order to act on this x-ray,

he had to take it to a completely different doctor who was willing to operate on him. He had to go to a wizard in California. True. I think Tim was so certain that this was of alien origin that he was like, I want to go to someone that knows more about this, that is a bit more of an expert in this realm. What if it's somebody who agrees with me? Yeah, more or less.

More or less. Got it, got it, got it. Hey, I don't understand the American healthcare system, but I understand it could be difficult to find a doctor who will work with your insurance company. Yeah. And I don't know how you explain to your insurance company that you have an alien object inside your body. Yeah. You know, sometimes if you want an operation like this, you have to go to a guy called Dr. Obsidian. Yeah.

I don't think Obama care covers this. I don't think so either. Here's the part that you might not enjoy, Kit. since discovering and removing the implant you son of a bitch where is this going no no no no it's fine it's just you know this is something that we always look for in a case okay how does an alien encounter or something this dramatic he started selling the hats

he didn't start well I don't know if he's selling the hats he might be selling the hats what's wrong with that it looks like we sell hats we sell hats yeah but we're not selling we're not selling kind of alien salvation but uh go on yeah go on Tim has become very outspoken about his experiences and his implant. He often takes interviews, he gives public addresses, he allows his name to be used in the press. Cool.

He's done a lot of TV shows with Dr. Lear, who removed the implant, and is frequently on panels and things with people like Whitley Striber talking about their own alien experiences. I actually, at one point reading an article, realized that Tim has in his quest for knowledge and to understand what happened to him. He actually just straight up gave out his phone number and email address. Call him right now. Come on. So I actually have Tim's email address. Show us the medal, Tim.

And I'm going to read it on the podcast, but I don't want everyone to start sending him emails because I don't want to be mean. So I'll tell it. I'll tell it to Kit and then we can beep it on the podcast. Well, I suppose they can Google it if they really want to. If you really want to. His email address is So,

I think we're done. I think we're done. I think we're done. I think we're done. So, listen, I didn't have time to reach out beforehand, but hey, if people want, maybe we could do a follow-up. Call us for a number right now.

I'm not going to call his number. Text him, text him then. I actually don't know if I have his number. I message him. You said you're walking it back. You're walking it back. You just said it. Let's talk theories. I have one. That's important. He's a fias liar. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. I don't want to hear it. This is an individual, a member of the paranormal community

who's been abducted and implanted with foreign technology. We need to treat him with some goddamn respect. And he's going on TV and he's putting his email address out there and he's given interviews and he's not shown. And he's not, and he's not handed over the thing for testing and he's not even shown. He's not even proven that. it's metal in the first place. I don't know where the melon seed went. I don't know where it went. All right, brother. But hey, sometimes...

You call it a Ford Fiesta a minute ago. And now it's a melon seed once I'm asking to see it. It's like, oh, well, it's so tiny. It's basically barely exists. Really? You couldn't even see it under a microscope. It's more of a thought. It's more of a vision.

And bearing in mind, the average human in 2026 allegedly has a credit cards worth of microplastic in their brain. I think that was debunked. I think microplastics were debunked. Yeah, but we do have... No, no, they were. It was all a hoax. They weren't.

I think I know what you're talking about. It was a hoax by big recycle to get us to stop using plastic. Yeah. Wow. The lobbyists have got to Rory, it seems. Microplastics weren't debunked. I think there was, I think they statistically, they were like, oh, we thought it had been ramping up massively. The detection of it.

And then they were like, I think actually our instruments have just gotten more sensitive over time. The microplastics are there. they just have probably been there for a lot longer than we thought. It's not in like the last like three years. Oh, okay. So it's still something we have to worry about? I think so, yeah. I just want to know about like how careful I have to be about this.

Because for lunch yesterday, I ate a GI Joe. And obviously that's like 100% plastic because I thought we didn't have to worry about it anymore. I thought they were like plastic is delicious now. You can have as much as you want. You thought it was like Play-Doh. It's non-toxic. Yeah. You just have as much as you want.

You can just eat as much as you want. I'm just snacking on a bowl full of Lego figurines because I'm like, it's fine. They said plastic isn't real anymore. I did hear a YouTuber Hank Green talking about it recently, who's a clever guy. And he gave a slightly worrying answer where they were like, how bad is it?

And he's like, well, it doesn't seem to be as bad as lead or asbestos. So that's good. It's still a gang you don't really want to be associated with, you know? Yeah, yeah. Yeah. It's kind of like, hey, little timmy's not doing well at school. It's like, yeah, but all right, but his best friends murdered a guy and are selling a class A drugs. So actually, little timmy's, he's all right.

He's not too bad. Yeah. Listen, you got to, if you pardon the pun, you've got to pick your poison. Life ain't fun without a little bit of poison. That's what I'm saying. Because that's how you really feel alive. That's what I'm saying, apostrophe. You know, diet Coke.

Every Diet Coke tastes like the gentle breeze of death. That's what it tastes like. You have a sip and you're like, that's cold and refreshing. And I think I just took a minute off my life. There's no way that stuff is good for me. What's ever in that? I was thinking that the other day that like diet soft drinks, they really cracked it, which is they said,

because everyone's health conscious these days, the health movement, you know, everyone, a lot of like people who care about their health and are motivated to care about it. They've sworn off the bad stuff. We all got the memo. No drugs. Yep.

Try and limit your alcohol. Yeah. Thaddy food. Bad for your heart. Yeah, you know. Have a Burger King, but not every night. You know what I'm saying? People try to eat well.

But it's like the companies figured out. They were like, if we can figure out the little treat for the people who are trying to be healthy, infinite money glitch. Yep. And they found it. And they found. Because you'll hear it all the time. People who are like health conscious, you know, or like all the way through to like a

Victoria's Secret model or something, you know, Giselle. They got to Giselle probably. You know, where Giselle will be like, she's like, I fast 280 days of the year. I do three hours of workouts a day. Yeah. I only drink lemon water, no coffee. But between you and me, I have a lot. little cheeky diet Pepsi. You can have a diet Pepsi. Three times a week. They almost cracked it with

cigarettes. They did for a long time, actually. Because with cigarettes, they were like, hey, here's this thing. There's 20 of them in a pack. They make you feel amazing. Guess how many calories? Zero. And you're like, holy shit. I love that 20 of them in a pack was the selling point. You can fit so many in a little box. Super handy. And you're like, sick. Do they do anything else? Um, yeah, lung cancer. You barely covered the words long cancer with the call. Lung cancer.

That's how out of breath they are from smoking 20 a day. Yeah, do you want to try one? They're delicious. No, thank you. No, thank you. Let's talk theories. There's only one main theory in this case.

And I think it is an interesting one. It does make a lot of sense. out of this chaos. Aliens? And the theory comes from Tim. No, no, no, like a bigger way to wrap it all together. Sure. Because how do you wrap this together?

A man who predicted the future in his dreams, predicted an alien encounter, was visited multiple times, then discovered an implant in his arm. Here's what Tim thinks. Tim thinks that he is an individual that for some reason possesses psychic abilities. What happened was in his life, he reached a point where he began to predict a future in his dreams. He says aliens are not capable of doing that. They don't possess that ability. Right.

So to study it, monitor it, and find a way that they could achieve it too. They came down, visited him and put the chip in his arm. He think that's why they've been visiting him over the years. And that's why they tracked him so they can figure out how they can see things in their dreams. That's his only logical explanation, which does at least tie the events of this story together in a bow. It makes sense of chaos. Yeah. I actually think that's a pretty, yeah, it's not the worst explanation I've ever heard for an abduction story.

It certainly, as you say, makes sense perfect way putting up. Make sense of the chaos. Make sense of the events he was experiencing before the abductions. You know, I don't love when, you know, the explanation for the abduction boils down to I'm awesome. Yeah. You know, I'm, you know, the crazy thing is, I'm just uniquely awesome. And kind of, I'm so awesome. And yet no one on my planet appreciates that.

I will say, no one has ever cared on this planet. But the people out there, people out galaxies away, I'm their rock star. Yeah. We did get to see a lot of this when we attended Contact in the Desert, the world's largest UFO conference, a lot of the individuals there do claim to have experienced alien encounters and even be, been abducted before. And you will find the majority of them when asked why you, they have that answer. They're like, oh, it's because I'm special. It's because my brain is at a different frequency. It's because they see potential in me. And that's why they keep coming back to me because I can

communicate with them. You can't, but I can. And I'm more important in that way. What I will say is it's not, None of these guys are Tom Brady. Yeah. You know, it's not Chris Hemsworth. No guy who looks at Chris Hemsworth has ever got up on stage. I've just been like, it's time to break the silence around what happened to me in Perth in 1989. Yeah. You know, and dabbing the tears off his beautiful jawline.

I mean, we did when we were at contact in the desert, we did both see the most beautiful man we've ever seen in that line. That's true. That actually just threw me for a loop, which you just said. Yeah, the most handsome guy. He was so hot. It was unbelievable how hot this guy was. Yeah. And he was fully down the rabbit hole.

He was trying to like tell us about ancient alien relics that he had discovered during expeditions in Peru. And like, you know, I'm just like flipping his hair as he's talking. Oh my God. I'm just nodding along being like, yeah, no, that's, yeah, the artifacts. That's really, that's amazing. You're just doing such beautiful. And your phone number, sir, like Tim. Did you put your phone number on?

But what I'm saying is that, you know, yeah, look, these guys are, don't on paper have a bunch going on. You know, and in some ways, that's interesting because they're normal people. They're normal people. They're not remarkable. They're not. But you have to acknowledge, I'm not being cruel. You have to acknowledge that there's an irony in these extraterrestrials taking interest in these extremely average jokes. Now, maybe that's the point.

They're not average on a biological sense. sense or a spiritual intergalactic sense. They are like X-Men, I suppose, is what he's saying. Yeah. And I wanted to be very clear. I'm not saying Tim is a loser. I think this guy, a stand-up guy who came back from breaking his neck in a car accident to work, hold down a full-time job, support his entire family through this time of

incredible strife and confusion. He's a hero. He's an American hero. But, yeah, sometimes the guys who get abducted regularly are a bit weird. Sure. Yeah. You know, I think at least with Tim, he's going a little bit further than saying it's because I'm special and because I'm, you know, I possess a hyper-intelligent brain. He's saying it's because of the dream thing.

Remember the dream thing that I told everyone about? I think that's why it's happening. Yeah. Hey, let me let me say, I've stolen this line and I don't know who have taken it from, but they once said, I had a dream. No, they said there is no paranormal phenomenon without psychological phenomenon. They are linked and that's an uncomfortable truth that we like to delineate in our modern dualist capitalist world we live in, that something either happened in reality or it was in your head. And if it was in your head, cuckoo!

Off to the loony bin, you bastard. or you've got video footage of it and it's real. I think the uncomfortable reality, as we've seen through years of investigating paranormal tales, is that they are linked more than we would like to believe. We would love the 4K video footage of it. But I actually do. I don't poo-poo stories necessarily

where it starts in a dream or a vision or whatever. This is the great thing about this case and the bad thing about this case is if Tim was just making all of these claims, that would be one thing. But we do have some physical evidence, which is the chip. The problem is, where's the chip? He hasn't shown anybody the chip by all kinds. The chip.

And look, I could be wrong. I don't need your email address. I need the chip. Can I just email him, where's the chip? Yeah. Because I think if you want the more people in the world to know about this, you obviously brought it to an expert, that's great. Then bring it to a skeptic.

Bring it to, if this was me, I would show it to every single person. Because I would almost want this thing to be debunked. And I think this is where the skepticism for this case comes in to me, because I just want to know more about the chip. I want to know more about the thing that was found. You know, one problem I have is, yes, it is very strange to have a piece of metal lodged in your arm that you didn't know about. This dude did have a car crash, like a couple years ago.

Yeah. Flip a car like six times. Really good point. That is a moment in your life where a piece of metal could enter your body. You're just saying it is. It was a Ford Fierce. Oh, it's a piece of a Ford. But Ford F-150 probably, but oh wow, we solved it.

I don't know. That's a problem for me. If he, if nothing had happened, he also works like on a construction site. Like there is bits of metal flying around. I don't know. There's just, there's a world where this could have been something a bit more normal. I mean, the video is weird. You can check out the video of the chip moving by its.

self or like... It didn't move by it. It did. I will say it feels fun and unique that they have this video of the chip. There's a real life thing that I shouldn't even call it a chip. The melon seed that came out of them. They have that. There are other stories.

There are other UFO stories out there where people have reportedly fragments of UFOs. Yeah. That we have talked about on the show. There is declassified documents to suggest that the U.S. Air Force has procured and bought quote unquote fragments of UFOs from individuals who claim to have owned them.

There is, I've shot it out in previous years, there is a podcast. If you want to really go deep, then Google the Ecosystemic Futures podcast, which is done by a kind of consortium of scientists and researchers. It was part funded by NASA and it caused a stir

when it launched on Reddit in the UFO communities because they talked extremely, alarmingly candidly about UFO research. And at one point, people like, I think it's Hal put off, were described as being in contact with research labs in America and around the world at the moment who claim to be in possession and testing alien materials, which when they try to heat them or freeze them or destroy them, they can intelligently redesign themselves.

If they try to destroy it, it will reassemble itself. You're hearing just mind-bending, strange things from real scientists. So I'm not saying all that's 100% real, but I'm saying there are even wilder but more reliable claims being made about UFO materials. Sure. Yeah. Maybe today is, you know, a taste of that, but maybe not the most convincing version of it. Yeah, just not saying it's the final boss to say that, you know, we have something inside a guy. Sounds like we're ready for conclusions.

I'm happy to lead off today's case. I like this story a lot. I like it a lot more than I thought I would. I think, you know, you're seeing someone who's had a relationship with the paranormal his entire life. And there's a reason for that. If what Tim is saying is to be believed he was chipped at one point during his probably first experience where he experienced missing time, there's more to Tim's story.

You know, he's been interviewed a lot and he's done these shows like the William Shatner one. I think this is where maybe the argument's. starts to fall apart a little bit. Tim talks about how the chip impacted him when it was in his body, saying he elevated consciousness and his brain power increased. But then there's times where it was like the chip was taken out and he was like he had to nap all through the day. He said he felt like a 70 year old man. There's a lot going on in this case. I don't think he really understands what's going on, but that doesn't help us understand what's going on. I'm kind of beating around the bush here, but I think this week for me, it's unfortunately

going to be a no. It's a no. I like the guy. I've warmed to the guy, but it is a no. Yeah, a double no this week. Yeah. Yeah, I don't think Tim's hoaxing us actively. No, me neither. But I just, I don't know if that is a real UFO chip. Yeah. I think

you know, our role in this podcast is to decide whether or not we think something is absolutely definitively, paranormal, unexplainable. And I think unfortunately today, we just can't do that. But I I hope you enjoyed the case into the Tim Cullen abduction, where we looked into alien implants, something we've done on the podcast before, but not a lot. There's not a ton of stories like this

out there in the world. So great to be able to cover one on the podcast. And now that I have Tim's email, we should send him a little message, let him know that we covered him on the show. Yeah. I don't know if he's up for doing a guest appearance. Well, not now that we said it's not real. Yeah, that's a good point. I actually don't know how old Tim is. I think he's really getting up there at this point. So show us the chip. But I think he's still alive.

Get it off your chest. Literally. Yeah. Get us off the chest. Thank you so much for listening to this week's episode of this paranormal life. I really enjoyed hosting this one. We had a few alien ones recently that have been very close. But also, if you missed it, we recently did get a WS on a ghost.

case, a paranormal case, which is quite rare. So that was a real treat to pull off. Of course, if you want to support the show, the best way to do so is over on patreon.com forward slash this paranormal life. Patreon is a little website for as little as five bucks. You can sign up and join and support the guys, the team here, the crew making this paranormal life every week. How long have you been making this show for, Kit? It is going to be nine years. on May 17th, I believe. Wow. And guess how many years we would have been making this show if we didn't have Patreon?

Nine days. Nine days. And we would have been out of money almost immediately. It's only because of the support that we get on Patreon that we've managed to grow this show and continue to do it every single week. So if you want to engage with the community, if you want to support the show. And most importantly, if you want to get a bunch of cool extra rewards like bonus episodes, weekly episodes, cool raffle prizes, and some exclusive merchandise, you need to head on over to Patreon.com forward slash This Paranormal Life. I am a voracious podcast listener. I crash out when I run

out of episodes from my favorite shows. Yeah. And that's why I will, I'll dip in and out of supporting different shows on Patreon to get access to those extra episodes. And that's, that's what you should know is that that doesn't need to be you. You never need to run out of TPL episodes because that's a benefit of us having gone for as long as we have. There's whatever 400 or so main episodes here, there's well into triple digits of bonus episodes over on Patreon and well, well into triple digits of after party weekly episodes over on Patreon.

So there's, man, someday will hit a thousand episodes. Yeah. That's insane. I mean, over on Patreon, We are fighting against inflation to the point of bankruptcy, trying as hard as we can to ensure we keep our prices as low as possible. Right. It's been, the entry tier has been five bucks for almost a decade, yeah. Yeah, which we used to say, like, five bucks, that'll get you two cups of coffee in the morning.

It'll get your moonboot and a trip to Zanzibar. We started like real old guys. Yeah. Now it'll buy you. I don't even know. You can get two sniffs of an espresso that gets served to someone else. That's what you get. But it's true. It's true. Imagine in the morning if instead of buying your morning coffee,

you spent five bucks on the This Paranormal Life Patreon. And immediately, instead of having a coffee that lasts you five, ten minutes, you get over a thousand hours of bonus audio that you can make your way through to keep you entertained all month long. Five bucks. It's around four pounds. That ain't even getting you a cross on in East London anymore. Let me tell you. It's wild out here. So check it out. It's the best way to support the show. Get some cool rewards. And one of those rewards is a shout out at the end of the podcast. That's what we're going to do right now. Let's go. So thank you to David Foster. David Foster, wow. You have arrived in perfect time. Oh my God. I've forgot about it. It's a pretty stressful situation for a minute. We need a foster carer, David, because there's a lot of loose. kids.

Oh dear. In the commune. A lot of them. A lot of them. Tragic, really. Lost a lot of the parents to the pit. Oof. Parents shouldn't have been sinners.

That's all I'll say. So the kids, a lot of kids run around. We need, I know a lot of countries that have like a legal limit of like maybe one foster character look after what, one, two kids. How does 98, 105 kids sound? Per person? Per David. Just for David.

Oh, just for David. We want David to take all the kids. Yeah. And there are a range of ages. You know how it goes, David. The 12-year-olds can start looking after the 10-year-olds. The 10-year-olds can start looking after the 2-year-olds. They raise themselves at a certain point.

Basically, it's like an infinite money glitch, actually. As someone who has 13 kids of his own, it's not as hard as it looks, David. After two, it's all. It's the first three, I hear. Yeah. It's a tough bit. Thank you, David, for fostering the kids of the commune. Thank you also to Kyle.

We can't trust Kyle with any kids. A guy who goes by the singular name Kyle. If you could like, I don't know, teach skateboarding on the weekends or something in the commune. Yeah. Plus, I feel like this is the kind of person where if you take your eyes off Kyle, he runs a mile. Yeah. He's going to nip out to the commune store for a pack of smokes. And he's not coming back to his 98 foster kids.

Yeah. Sorry, Kyle. But I do think a guy like Kyle, a little bit of a babe magnet, I think that's good for morale for the ladies. the commune, the straight ones at least. Yeah. Keep a guy like Kyle around, you know, that makes it seem like, you know, hey, commune's a dynamic place to be. I don't want to docks you, Kyle, but it is great to see that we're making up this kind

of vision of who you are as a person. But your Patreon avatar is just you flexing your bicep into the camera. All right. Which I think that's just fantastic. My wife listens to this podcast, Kyle. Quit the flexing. His arm is enormous. Okay.

It's great. Thank you. Also, two, Al Dusty. Al Dusty is the kind of cowboy you don't want to meet it down. Mm-hmm. Because Al, when it's time for to draw, they pull out their gun on the count of one. Shit, they don't even play by the rules. Totally illegal.

You are not supposed to do that. In cowboy rules, that's like the dirtiest, nastiest little thing you can do. Oh, it's illegal? What are you going to do? Jewel me? Then let's do it. On the count of, wink, three. And I know, I know you're not going to do it.

He shoots. Doesn't even wait till one this time. You want to duel me? How about we do? Yeah. Shoot some dead. Al, you shouldn't do that, but I do respect the game. You know, at the end of the day, you're the one alive.

You can tell everyone that you did shoot on three. Yeah. So dead men tell no tales. Isn't what that what they say? I think that's about pirates. But pirates, cowboys, ninjas, they're all kind of very similar worlds. They live by a similar code. They do.

Thank you also to Maddox Velensky. Yeah, Maddox Volanski, I don't know if you're even getting that person in a jewel. I think they're the type to nominate a champion. You know, they'll slap someone with the glove, and they're like, I'm going to jewel you. Yeah. And they're like, yeah, you can jewel Dusty. You could jewel Al Dusty. Yeah.

Maddox Valansky, also known as Mad Dog Valensky. Oh, I was wrong. Really? Is that in parentheses? No, that's just their cowboy name. Oh, I see. Maddox, Valdanski, Maddox Vlanski. I'm stretching there a little bit, but yeah, kid is right.

That is a cowboy that you don't want to mess with. Not at the saloon, not anywhere. Can we get at least one cowboy that I would want to mess with? I wouldn't trust myself in a duel at all. I wouldn't duel Rory, because Rory has proved through a countless video game tournament, games of ping pong, ski ball, any game you can think of, he has that fast twitch muscle fiber. Called ADHD. I've got some kind of governor, regulator going on.

I've got some kind of speed bump in my brain. It might be a microchip in my arm that just slows me down. I'm not too quick of a cat, really. So I would not trust myself to Jewel at all. I weirdly did while working IGN for the release of Kingsman 2 was sent away. Companies have too much money. I was sent on a two-day cowboy training retreat. Why did you quit that job?

It was wicked. Where they got the stunt men and the stunt coordinators from the second Kingsman movie to train a bunch of journalists to be cowboys. So I learned how to use a whip, use a rope, like a lopold. lasso. Okay. And also quickfire pistol from your holster. Wasn't a real gun though. I can't say, I can't say any more about that.

He signed an NDA. I did. He already killed a guy. Killed the instructor accidentally. Thank you also to Mallory Kroll. Let's play a game of Fick Mallory Kroll. Dusty, Maddox

and Rory. Mallory, yeah. Thank you. so much, Mallory. Thank you, Mallory. Mallory is the kind of person that just wants to rock and crawl all night, and I could get on board with that kind of energy, you know? Rock and crawl. Rock and or crawl sounds like a music genre from an alien planet. Yeah. Like George Lucas would be like, oh, that's not rock and roll. That's rock and crawl. In my years, like, George, just say what it is.

Because you famously, aliens in Star Wars played the genre of jizz music. Not jazz music. That is canonical. I'm not making it up and not trying to be funny. It is canonically known as jizz. So rock and crawl music, Mallory, you got to send us a demo. I want to hear it. And thank you finally this week to Liam Tonmore.

Liam Tonmore should have done more if he didn't going to get thrown in the pet. Oh, yeah. Oh, my, my. Ewee splats. Alright, look, you gotta stop. If you're gonna throw people in the pit, just ask first how many children they have, because Liam had nine.

So that's nine more for David to foster. What? Yeah, exactly. We're already out on the limit here. Can we pull him back out? Is it too late for Liam? There's no bottom. There's no bottom to the pit. He's falling forever, yeah.

Oh. So I don't know, you would have to find a way to lower a rope at terminal velocity, and even then we might not catch him. I should, like, I said like he should have done more. He was actually a pretty good worker, to be honest. Yeah, definitely shouldn't have put him in the pit. Like, yeah, it was like, like, yeah, he might have been towards the bottom of the pack of statistics like this month for our workers.

But like this was a record month of productivity, to be honest. So actually, everyone really is held. He would have been top of the bracket last month. It would have been top of the bracket. Now he's bottom of the pit, unfortunately. We're sorry, Liam. If you ever climb out of the pit, which some people have, often they're pushed back. David Foster, we got some more kids for you.

We got a couple more. Thank you, Liam. Thank you everyone that supports us on Patreon. We literally couldn't make this show without you. I hope you enjoyed this week's episode of the podcast. And of course, we will be back next week with another groundbreaking paranormal tale. Ciao.