This Past Weekend - #586 - Nigel Ng (Uncle Roger)
Episode Date: June 3, 2025Nigel Ng is a comedian, content creator and restaurateur originally from Malaysia. He’s known for his viral character “Uncle Roger” who roasts celebrity chefs and bad cooking. Nigel joins The...o to talk about some of the big differences between eastern and western cultures, how his viral food content led to him opening a restaurant of his own, and the joke that might have put him on China’s watchlist… Nigel Ng: https://www.instagram.com/mrnigelng/ ------------------------------------------------ Tour Dates! https://theovon.com/tour New Merch: https://www.theovonstore.com ------------------------------------------------- Sponsored By: Celsius: Go to the Celsius Amazon store to check out all of their flavors. #CELSIUSBrandPartner #CELSIUSLiveFit https://amzn.to/3HbAtPJ Manscaped: Go to https://manscaped.com and use code THEO to get 15% off your entire order. ESPN+: Go to https://plus.espn.com/theo to buy now and tune-in to UFC 316 on Saturday, June 7 at 10 PM ET. Better Help: This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp - go to http://betterhelp.com/theo to get 10% off your first month. Rocket Money: Download the Rocket Money app and enter our show name - This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von - in the survey so they know I sent you! ------------------------------------------------- Music: “Shine” by Bishop Gunn Bishop Gunn - Shine “N****s Can Be Gay Too” by YVES https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z2bkhRBHE2Q ------------------------------------------------ Submit your funny videos, TikToks, questions and topics you'd like to hear on the podcast to: tpwproducer@gmail.com Hit the Hotline: 985-664-9503 Video Hotline for Theo Upload here: https://www.theovon.com/fan-upload Send mail to: This Past Weekend 1906 Glen Echo Rd PO Box #159359 Nashville, TN 37215 ------------------------------------------------ Find Theo: Website: https://theovon.com Instagram: https://instagram.com/theovon Facebook: https://facebook.com/theovon Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/thispastweekend Twitter: https://twitter.com/theovon YouTube: https://youtube.com/theovon Clips Channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/TheoVonClips Shorts Channel: https://bit.ly/3ClUj8z ------------------------------------------------ Producer: Zach https://www.instagram.com/zachdpowers Producer: Trevyn https://www.instagram.com/trevyn.s/ Producer: Nick https://www.instagram.com/realnickdavis/ Producer: Andrew https://www.instagram.com/bleachmediaofficial/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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I've got some tour dates to tell you about. I'll be in Cedar Rapids, St. Paul, Minnesota, Fargo, North Dakota, Rapid City, South Dakota, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, Rochester, New York, and Detroit, Michigan, all in June and July. Tickets available now at Theo Vaughan.com slash T-O-U-R. Thank you so much for your support.
Today's guest is a content creator, a restaurateur, and a comedian.
He is from Malaysia, and he found his way to the UK and America by doing comedy.
He's known for his character, Uncle Roger, Uncle Roger, a grumpy food critic who roasts celebrity chefs,
and with that, he's gained more than 30 million followers.
Quite the ride with today's guest.
I couldn't be more geeked to get to hang out.
with Nigel Ung.
Good.
What's the most vain Asians you think?
Because Asians, you don't think of,
because people think about Asians a lot, right?
Do they?
Do they think about Asians a lot?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, okay, okay.
Yeah, why?
Why would you think about this a lot?
Because I think it's fascinating.
Okay.
Right.
Because people can't, some people can't believe it.
They see it.
You show somebody, like you show a baby in Asian or whatever.
whatever, I think they'd be surprised kind of.
No, it looked the same.
Smaller eyes, squintier eyes, that's it.
You know?
Oh, that's a good point.
Some of them are, I guess, if you have a tall baby, yeah.
Yeah, we have a little squintier, little flatter nose.
That's it, really.
You're all the same, man.
Yeah, some of us can look wider than you.
Some of us can be fairer than white people.
Oh, yeah, that's a good point, huh?
Yeah, I think we should have the, we should have some white privilege.
I know, right?
Yeah.
Yeah, that sounds fair.
I'm wider than you.
Look at this.
Look at this shit.
Yeah.
Look at this hunky.
Look at this freaking sesame cracker.
Oh, thank you.
That's ridiculous.
Thanks for inviting me on here, Theo.
Dude, it's a pleasure, man.
Thank you so much.
But no, what a, um, Nigel, Nigel, Nigel.
Nigel.
Nigel.
Yes.
And how do you say the last name?
Ung, Ung, Ung.
It's Southeast Asian, Malaysian last name.
That's where I'm from originally.
Yeah, that's a living, you got a, you're the damn living inward right there.
I can't even.
I know.
It's dangerous, isn't it?
It's dangerous.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It is.
Yeah.
There's a few letters away.
It's risky, brother.
There's an N-I-G.
There's no A in there, thankfully.
Yeah, but there's enough there, I think, where, like, people would be like, what's going on here?
Yeah, there's that Vietnamese, that's a meme of the Vietnamese restaurant.
The name of the restaurant is B-I-C-H-N-G-A.
Oh, wow.
Just pronouncing, just ordering food, huh?
Yeah, just call it.
the Vietnamese.
There's one where there's a black guy
narrating over it and saying
you can't tell me this is not bitch.
Yeah.
Wow, brother.
That's what I'm saying, man.
We try, man.
But I also like it's cafe.
All of the ribs.
So this is a popular sound in
and you said you're from Malaysia?
Yeah, yeah.
That's not, in Vietnam it would be NG something.
Okay.
N-G-A, N-G-U-Y-E-N-W-N-W-N, right?
But in Malaysia, Singapore and Hong Kong, you will see N-G.
N-G.
Yeah, yeah.
It's confusing.
No.
Ung, um, yeah.
Yeah, I went to Malaysia one time when I was a student.
Oh, shit, really?
Yeah, we went to, what's the capital?
Why?
Kuala Lumpur.
Kuala L'A.
Yeah.
For what?
I just was a student on this thing called Semester at Sea.
It's like a floating school.
Uh-huh.
And one of the stops was over there in Malaysia.
So we took a boat, like a boat over there.
Like a cruise ship.
It's like a, like a, like a, pull it up.
That's a long trip, man.
Oh, it's a long trip.
We left out of Vancouver, Canada.
That's how I got here from the same boat, I think.
Oh, really?
Yeah, I just crawled on to your, you know, your boat without a visa.
Oh, yeah.
Welcome.
That's how most people are getting in, dude.
Semester at sea.
We are not the best tourist destination, though, Malaysia.
You know, we're like a little, tiny little country.
We live well there.
The quality of life is pretty good.
But we're not like a big tourist place.
Yeah, I think it felt like that.
I think it felt like the beaches and then kind of what do we do here a little bit?
There's nothing to do there.
You just eat and live, live your life.
But are, so don't forget this, are Malaysians the most vain?
Who's the most vain?
Koreans, man.
Is it?
Yeah, like Korean Koreans.
Not Bobby Lee Korean.
You know, Bobby Lee's, I think he was born here, right?
Bobby Lee?
Yeah.
There's undeniable that God does not have a birth certificate.
That's legitimate.
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah.
He probably, he's obviously a P-O-W, you know?
Yeah, he has very P-O-W energy.
That's true.
And he has a lot of trauma, I think.
Yeah, he has a lot of burn marks on his back too.
Oh, really?
Yeah, from cigarettes, I think from gambling issues, but people say different things, you know.
Yeah, but I think Koreans are the vainest Asians, man.
They have a whole skin care.
They're known for skincare.
The whole country is known for skin care and plastic surgery.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
Bring up some of that Asian skin care.
There's lots of stuff, man.
And they put snail, that snail juice, you know, and a snail crawls, it leaves behind like a trail of goo.
Yeah.
They put that shit on their skin.
No way.
Look at, look at that woman.
She's like glowing.
Look at that.
Oh, they got some porch lambasians over there.
They got, you know what I'm saying?
Yeah.
Yeah, that's why I think they already, some people look dead already because they just are preserved.
Yeah.
Preserved well.
Bring up that snail juice thing.
I want to see that.
Can we get something about that?
You have to Google snail mucin.
M-U-C-S-E.
I'm
Yeah.
That's why I have a
I have a joke
about this that I do
in my act
that it's hard
to find Asian
pedophiles
because, you know,
they all look like
they're 12
but they're actually
35, you know?
Why would you
take the risk on an illegal
one?
Oh yeah.
You'll find you
just molesting yourself.
Yeah, just
molesting your people
and then you're like,
oh shit.
It looks 16.
Advanced.
Yeah, that kind of thing.
Advanced snail 96
Muson Power essence,
lightweight essence
which absorbs
into the skin
fast to give skin a natural glow from the inside.
This essence is created from nutritious, low stimulation filtered snail mucin to keep your
skin moisturized and illuminated all day.
Wow.
Yeah, it's good marketing, marketing writing, right?
Yeah.
I don't know how real it is.
How do you know it's actually snail mucin?
Yeah.
You could just be water and sugar and cornstarch.
Oh, yeah.
They could have anything in there.
They don't do that kind of shit.
I think that's, yeah.
I think they just get the...
That's very Asian right there.
No, it's a white woman doing it.
Yeah, but we learned it from you guys.
I mean, that is cheekbones sashimi.
That's true.
That's true.
We bring a lot to the world.
Oh, that's so wild.
So that's a real thing that people are buying this.
And how much does it go for?
Give me how much for a quart of it?
Oh, CVS has it?
No.
Go get some later.
Really?
2499.
2499 for over seven and a half ounces, huh?
Yeah.
You don't.
need it. You have good skin, man. I'm okay, but
you know, everybody wants to do
a little bit more. But how do you even farm
it out of them? Do you follow right behind them with a
little scooper? I don't know, man.
Maybe they just have a whole cage full of snails
and... Oh, and maybe it's like a...
It just drips down into a bucket
or something.
That's correct. I haven't thought of...
I haven't thought of this.
Forcing snail to release musin through harsh
treatment, like dunking them in salt water.
No way. That's very... That's very mean.
This was probably taught
by a lot of the forces in Vietnam.
Some of this is illegal.
Some of the, go back to it.
Some of this, this is considered waterboarding.
I think snail mucin, a popular skincare ingredient,
is collected from live snails through various methods,
some more humane than others.
Traditional methods involve forcing snails to release mucin
through harsh treatment,
like dunking them in salt water or chemicals.
It's like killing a whole family just so someone can have like smoother skin.
Oh.
Many companies now use methods like gentle stimulation are allowing snails to naturally excrete
musin on mesh nets ensuring their well-being.
Wow.
What's gentle stimulation for a snail, you know?
I think just a little...
A little fingering action on...
Just petting?
Petting.
Heavy petting.
Maybe listening to some...
What's a popular Malaysian, like, love musician?
We don't really have.
We don't really have that.
You can use an American musician.
Probably, some Marvin Gay, I guess.
You can play some Marvin Gay.
Some Malarvan Gay.
Is that fair?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, if we had some Malervin Gay.
Yeah.
And we played that, that would be beautiful.
Let's get it on.
And you're just touching that snails back?
Yeah, yeah, a few snails.
It's not just one.
Yeah, it's true.
You can't just four play with one snail.
Yeah, that's weird.
They move too slow.
Yeah, yeah, you got to get a little batch.
It's like, you know how that, that, that,
That chess movie where the one person is playing against 10 chess masters.
Uh-huh.
But it's you against 10 snails just...
Oh, yeah.
You just play...
It's almost like one of those, uh...
It's like that thing with those things you're dropping and you're catching them, you know?
Yeah, yeah.
I like it.
Nigel, good to see you, man.
Good to see you, too, man.
Thank you for all of the entertainment, man.
You definitely...
I make too many videos, man.
That's a life of a YouTube person, you know.
It is, huh?
Yeah.
I got my start.
I started doing stand-up.
2010, 2011?
You had a special that came out a few years ago, right?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It was released in a Moment House.
Yeah.
Have you used that platform before?
You just sell tickets, people buy it and they watch it.
Yeah, but I'm going to whack it on my YouTube eventually.
Moment House?
Yeah, yeah.
Is it live performance on Moment House?
Or is it, you just tape it, put it up, and then there's a premiere?
Yeah, yeah, something like that.
I think Andrew Schultz did it here.
Oh, that kind of thing.
And you started, so were you born in Malaysia?
Yeah, yeah.
I was born in Malaysia, and then I went to live there for 20 years.
years of my life. Then I went to university. I went to Northwestern in Illinois near Chicago.
Ooh, yeah. Yeah. And then I moved to the UK for a few years, for eight years, and I'm back
here in LA. What are Malaysian, because I don't know a ton about the Malay, right? Yeah, yeah.
Me either, really. You don't? You know, you have so many different races there, you know.
In Malaysia. Yeah. There's Chinese Malaysian, which I'm, I'm that. Malay Malaysians and Indian
Malaysians. And we don't really make so pretty segregated, you know. Really? Yeah. So there's
There's beef between what type of Malaysian you are.
There's no beef.
We just don't really care as much
if you're not part of the group.
But it's very peaceful.
It's very peaceful.
Yeah.
So it's not violent, but it's still like,
you just kind of stick with your tribe.
Yeah, yeah.
We try to venture out, but, you know,
sometimes it's hard to eat different things
and there are limitations to what Malays can eat, you know.
Oh, Malaysians can't eat everything?
Yeah.
Well, Malay Malaysians are Muslim.
They're Muslim?
Yeah.
So they can't eat pork, right?
And also in Malaysia,
certain restaurants need to be halal certified
for Malay people to eat it.
If a Malay person is caught eating at a non-halal restaurant,
depending on where you are, it could be, you know,
you could get into trouble, basically, yeah.
So there's those little things,
but we overall are pretty peaceful and we like each other.
You like each other, but every other then,
there's a little bit of Mongolian beef with each other.
Yeah, I feel that.
I've had that.
Yeah, yeah.
It's okay.
It's bad.
American Chinese shit.
It's travesty.
It's something you just,
it's something you fill your jaw with
while you look at through Target.
It's nice at an airport,
you know,
you get an airport Panda Express.
You know,
it's the best thing there.
Yeah, it's good.
Yeah,
sugar's good.
But sugar,
yeah.
You like sugar, come on.
I like it,
but I just know it doesn't,
I know it's secretly plotting against me.
That's what I feel like.
Really?
Sugar is flooding against you?
Well,
I feel like it gets in your system
and it knows it's going to win.
Because it's like a deteriorer,
deteriorant.
deteriorate.
It deteriorates you.
Yeah.
Well, most things do, though.
Most things that taste good are deteriorants, you know?
Cholesterol, fats, butter, olive oil.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Even vagina.
That'll ruin your life.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That, it ruins your time, really.
Just chasing vagina all the time.
I'm glad I'm out of that phase of my life now.
Yeah, that's what I heard.
I heard.
You got married, you've married a couple years now.
Well, I'm engaged a couple years now, but I'm engaged a couple of years now, but I'm,
I'm getting married in July.
Oh, you're getting married in July?
In two months, yeah.
Go way.
And so is this a traditional Malaysian wedding?
No, no, we're doing it in Europe.
My fiancé is American.
She's from Miami.
Well, South Florida.
Okay.
You know.
And was it scary for you to choose a fiancé?
How had dating been like for you in your life?
Well, I've been married before.
Yeah.
Married young, divorced young.
Do you have to get?
I recommend that.
Get that out the way.
That's my fiancee.
Nagu-ung.
Nightjong.
Oh, sorry.
YouTube's Uncle Roger shares photos from engagement shoot with fiancé Sabrina.
Oh, beautiful couple.
Yeah.
She's cute.
I think I did well, you know?
So I got her out.
I was like, lock it in, you know?
Can't do any better than that.
That's when men lock it in.
They're like, this is it.
Yep.
She's nice.
She's hot.
She's smart.
All right.
Let's do it.
Yeah.
Way better than the previous one, you know.
Oh, really?
Yeah, yeah.
No, the people's on, she was fine, but if you just ended up, grew apart, you know.
It didn't fit.
Well, I was really doing stand-up hardcore at the time, and it just takes a toll on your
relationships, right?
Oh, yeah.
You can't have a relate.
If you're doing stand-up, I think it's impossible, you know?
Because also the hours that you're out, it's very like.
And I had a day job, too.
So I was like 9 to 5 at the day job.
Then I was doing this, all this in the UK.
So after, after my day job finishes, I'll just take a long train up to Birmingham or something,
the middle of the UK from London, two-hour train.
do my set, come back, arrive home at one.
All I see her is sleeping.
He just sees me sleeping.
I see her sleeping.
And then seven years later, hey, we're not the same person anymore.
Okay, who would have guessed?
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, we're awake.
Yeah, we're awake.
And I don't like you when we're awake.
That's some issues with a lot of marriages, I think.
Yeah.
Go to bed.
I like you more.
We're unconscious.
In Malaysia, is it popular?
Sorry, because we've never had a Malaysian guest.
You should get Ronnie Chang next.
He's Malaysian, too.
I've messaged about it.
He's so funny.
I got to do it.
He's Malaysian?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
So some people keeping secret then,
because I didn't know that.
Yeah.
But I would love to see,
is it, in Malaysia,
I just want to learn about
a little bit of the tradition of the place.
Okay, let's do it.
Do you have to,
is it arranged marriage or what is dating like there?
No, it's not arranged at all.
Okay.
Yeah, you've got to find someone.
We got insults there, too.
You know,
Arranged marriages would be a great solution to the in-cell problem, wouldn't it?
And when insoles, you say, what do you mean?
Incells, you know, like gamers or whatever?
They can be incels, some of them.
There's a whole movement, isn't it?
The Reddit people, the, what I call it, blue pill, red pill, black pill?
Something pill.
The incels who, they can't get laid, and then they start hating on women, that kind of thing.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But no, no, in Malaysia, it's all, it's not arranged.
You have to arrange it for yourself.
Yeah, their gamer tag is like, these whores are ruining everything, 6,000 or whatever.
Thailand to sleep with some hoes, you know?
Yeah, oh, that kind of thing.
Yeah, but that's not, we don't really have that either.
That's what I'm saying in Malaysia, there's not much to do.
In Thailand, there's that, there's beaches, there's the red light district.
Bali, there's beaches and, you know, other places have other things.
Vietnam has the beaches and beaches and holes, really, all of Asia, really, except for Malaysia.
So, we are a bit boring.
And why is there a different, do they outlaw that kind of stuff there?
So they must have, because it seemed like you would just keep.
keep a stricter, yeah, why don't they have that prostitution and stuff like that?
And or just put some people to say hose, fun hose or whatever, fun money hose.
It's probably the religion thing.
It's majority Muslim in Malaysia.
So maybe that's frowned upon a little bit more.
I'm sure you can find some, maybe some like sugar baby type arrangement.
Right.
Yeah, but I've never looked into it.
Secret hose.
Secret hose.
Oh, there's an app for that.
I think it's called Sugar Book.
Sugar book?
Yeah, look it up.
It's a big app in Asia.
And I know, I know this app exists in Malaysia.
So it's like a dating app.
Let's see it.
But, you know, romance meets finance.
There you go.
Where romance meets finance.
Oh, definitely.
I mean, what about $40 a week?
It goes far, man.
It goes to money.
The U.S. dollar goes far in Asia.
Dude, what if our podcast, we sponsored a couple of sugar, we booked some sugar?
Let's book some sugar.
It's a deterrent, you know.
It is slowly, slowly clawed.
Oh, definitely. I can see it.
Ruining a lot of things.
How many episodes of a pod you put out a week is going to get that number way down, man.
But what if we book some sugar, right?
Yeah.
And we just support it.
And every now and then they just check in.
But they don't have to do anything sexual.
We have them maybe get a good hobby.
Yeah.
Maybe help around the neighborhood, clean up, pick up trash or something.
That would be nice.
I'm sure they'll be down.
This is safer than, you know, you know that the only fans model will fly to Dubai and they
get shat on.
Yeah.
You know,
that sugar book
is a safer alternative,
you know?
Oh,
I'm a huge
sugar book fan
all of a sudden.
Yeah.
I think it's good.
But I do,
I would love to look into
Nick,
maybe the price of
if we could
sponsor a couple
of good,
um,
women sugar,
sugar,
sugar,
sugar,
sugar girls.
I think a grand a month.
Ooh,
yeah.
That's a lot.
I mean,
you said it goes far over there,
dude.
I'm talking 80,
maybe 120 or month.
Okay.
You would get a different
quality of women for 80.
But that's okay.
But would it be great to sponsor that lady?
Let her just say, hey, take the week off.
Yeah.
Go relax, go for a run or something.
Okay.
Yeah, that would be good.
Sign up for something.
That would be great.
And we can support the infrastructure over there.
Yeah.
Is family big over there?
Is that like a big thing?
What's it like there that you notice that's different between Malaysia and U.S. or
UK culture?
I think it's really the difference between Asia and the West, really.
Family is big.
People live with their parents
and it's socially acceptable to do that.
And then when the parents get old,
we don't really send them to homes.
You know, we bring them into our own home
instead of sending them to a nursing home.
That's better, huh?
That's nice, I think.
Yeah.
But what I like about the West is everybody
everybody's so confident
and they have an opinion
and they're not afraid to express it.
And sometimes in Asia,
because we are taught a little bit more
just obey, obey, obey.
you don't really have that confidence and that assertiveness.
And sometimes that doesn't work well here.
If you're an Asian person in the West and you have a corporate job
and you just keep to yourself, you miss out on promotions
because you're just not speaking enough and not bullshitting enough
and not building that social relationship enough.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And do Asian people want to say more?
Do they have a feeling inside of them or like,
I want to speak up, but I don't think it's appropriate or is it I'm afraid
or it's just not part of their
natural capability.
I think it's all those things.
I think it's cultural.
It's like, I'm afraid.
Why don't I just mind my own business?
You know, put your head down and work hard.
Sometimes that doesn't work out well, you know?
You can't just put your head down.
You've got to put your head up
and look at the world and talk some shit.
Oh, yeah, dude.
That's what stand-up is, right?
Yeah.
Oh, you have your head down for a half hour.
Somebody will start fucking you around here, you know?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's a dangerous area.
That would have your head down.
Oh, yeah.
Some freaking Narcan monk you'll start freaking jacking you from the back over there, you know?
Yeah.
So it's definitely, you got to have your head up, man.
Yeah.
Is there something do you think that Americans could do to better support Asian people, like to, like, ask more.
Like, is there something like, you know what I'm saying?
Like, because sometimes there's never this communication about how cultures should interact,
and we're all just left to figure it out.
You ask me, like, I'm the leader of all the Asians.
But you can.
The door's been open for many moons.
Anybody can come.
Anybody can come legally.
I hear you're cracking down on that a little bit.
Just wipe your phone, you know.
Wap your phone before you come.
What can you do?
Honestly, I enjoy living in L.A.
because I feel like the Asian food here is probably some of the best in the world.
Maybe New York is better.
I don't know.
But here, I just drive 20 minutes to San Gabriel Valley
and that's all the Chinese and Taiwanese people.
and then there's Korea town a 10 minute drive from me
than a little Tokyo
You just, I like that
Just don't fuck with us, let us do our thing
Okay
And everybody's happy, you know
Just enjoy
Just enjoy our food
Enjoy the food
Yeah
It's great food, yeah
It's a lot of good stuff man
It's not like when I do the Laugh factory
They just don't let me on
Because I'm Asian
So I feel like I get the
No no no
They don't do that
I get the same opportunities I think
So unorganized over there
It seems like
I hate to say that
But everybody's been saying it
But they've been good to me.
They've been good to you.
I like the audiences there because it's like you get such a tourist crowd, right?
Oh, it's a good point.
So I feel like I'm playing to all of America, you know, west coast, east coast, middle.
Yeah.
Everywhere, the south.
And I think if a joke works there, you know you can take it on the road with you.
Yeah, it's a good point.
I think one thing that makes it tough in there is the lighting, the way the lighting, like the whole room is kind of lit up.
Yeah.
And so I think it creates an ambiance there sometimes where the audience is more involved in the show.
That's true.
You can see everyone.
Right.
And then they feel like they're supposed to be involved
because they're kind of not protected from the, you know,
because usually the audience is kind of in the dark.
Yeah, yeah, I see that.
And so Asian families, Malaysian families,
a lot of times you'll live at home.
Yeah, it's common.
Yeah.
More common than here.
That's cool, man.
And right now in L.A., hopefully, you know, if things go well,
I can buy a slightly bigger house with an ADU,
then fly my mom over, you know,
let her stay with us for a few months.
Oh, like an ADU is like, what?
additional dwelling unit.
Okay.
So like a separate guest house.
Like a casita or something.
A cassida.
Yeah, the accessory.
Accessory dwelling unit.
Secondary residential dwelling unit
located on the same lot
as a primary residence.
Yeah.
And so essentially a smaller
separate living space.
So a smaller house for the mom
and the mother-in-law
with their own kitchen
because Asian cooking
can stink up a house.
It's delicious,
but during the cooking process,
it smells.
It's bad?
It's bad.
It smells bad,
but it tastes good.
Why? What are some of the, is it because it's a lot of, I'm guessing, fish maybe or a cabbage?
Oh, God.
Yeah.
And then pepper paste.
A lot of pork.
You know how you cook bacon?
The whole house smells like bacon.
Yeah.
A lot of pork, a lot of garlic, shrimp paste.
You know, sometimes fermented shrimp paste.
Ooh, why?
Fish sauces.
Why?
But why?
Why?
It tastes good, man.
Yeah?
It tastes good.
It adds a different sort of flavor.
It adds this thing called umami to your food.
Hmm.
Yeah.
Try it.
Umami means what?
Umami.
is like, you know how the tongue can taste like four flavors,
sweet, sour, salty, and bitter?
Umami is like the fifth flavor.
It's a meaty, meaty savouriness, yeah.
Umami is one of the five basic taste sensations
along with a sweet, sour, salty, and bitter.
Yeah.
And is often described as a savory or meaty flavor.
Hmm.
Cheese has a lot of it, see?
Cheese.
So when you eat pizza, that's why it's so good, you know?
Oh, it is perceived through taste receptors
that respond to compounds like glutamins.
I'mate, inocinate, and guanyl, guanilate, which are abundant in food such as meat, cheese, tomatoes, and mushrooms.
Yeah.
I'll bring you around some Asian restaurants.
Food is my thing, you know.
I do comedy about food now.
Yeah, yeah.
Oh, yeah, I know.
I want to get into some of that.
I want to ask you, I'm just trying to get a little bit more idea.
Of Malaysia.
Just of what it feels like to be Malaysia, because you don't hear a ton about it.
Yeah.
And the biggest thing you heard about probably is the plane that.
You guys lost.
Yeah, we're still lost, man.
Is it really?
Still can't find it.
Oh.
It's crazy.
What's the word over there?
Bring that up Malaysian 370.
What's going on with it?
I think.
And the most, I've gone into a rabbit hole about this.
Also, Kathleen Madigan, she's a comic here.
And she has the best bit.
If you want the best stand-up routine about Malaysian Airlines,
go search Kathleen Madigan, MH-370.
Okay.
But my theory is the pilot wanted to kill himself.
And so he just, because of the way the plane,
swirved, the path the plane took, it swerved past his hometown first before riding off into the
Indian Ocean. So he just swerved past his hometown, just take one last peak. But by that point,
all the passengers on the plane were already unconscious. Really goes to the pressure?
Yeah, he depressurized the plane. But then the cockpit, the pressure stays on for a little bit longer.
So he was just taking one last peek at his hometown and then just driving off into the sunset and ocean.
It's almost kind of...
It's romantic.
Don't give them any ideas, man.
United Airlines don't need to hear this.
I hate to say this.
But it sounds a little bit romantic.
Yeah, let's play one clip right here.
What do we have?
Yeah.
...a disturbing reason for the plane's disappearance.
On and off search efforts have failed to locate the plane
which disappeared with 239 people on board more than four years ago.
60 Minutes Australia brought together an international group of aviation experts
who say that the plane's pilot crashed the flight intentionally.
Joining me now to discuss the report is CBS News.
And former chairman of the National Transportation Safety Board.
For sure.
And it looks like he probably shorted the Malaysia Airlines.
He definitely is, dude.
First, the flight path that was reconstructed using military radar.
What was suspicious about that?
Well, the plan showed that he was going in and out of very,
countries between Thailand and Malaysia.
One would have thought, based on that pattern, that someone would have sent up some military
aircraft to look at them.
But according to the television experts, they said he did this on purpose to evade the military
radar.
Well, one of the experts...
Well, it's kind of boring.
Yeah.
What do you expect, you know?
Yeah, what do you expect?
And it's like people like something...
It's like hiding go seek.
They never found the guy.
and people are just wondering where we find like a part of a wing every two years you know it's like a
fun little treasure hunt yeah it comes up i keep i keep track of this man this is that this is my true
crime oh it is you know it's the only thing people know is for and i i love it but also in a way
it's almost beautiful like a place so like it almost makes it mystical in a way Malaysia yeah
yeah thanks you know one one big the biggest thing that when my fiancee when she traveled to
Malaysia for the first time. She's American, right? So the biggest thing she noticed is
she told me she's never seen Muslim people who look Asian. I would say that is the biggest,
not culture shot, but the biggest observation you'll get. They look like me, but they're
Muslim. Oh, that's a surprise. Yeah, yeah. Over in the US, you don't see none of that.
No, do you see nothing like that? Yeah. Yeah, you see, um, a lot of people call Muslim Slims or
whatever, is like a nickname or Slims. Yeah. It's like a good, it's like a new, I don't want to say
racial slur, but it is what it is. It sounds like it almost.
One syllable, you know.
Yeah, look at these slims, right?
Yeah, look at these slims.
I like it. I like, you know, Muslims are definitely really interesting.
I've been learning more.
The Muslims in Malaysia, you know, well, everybody in Malaysia, they're not slim, though.
We have like a fat country, man.
Oh, it's fat country, huh?
Yeah, we're catching up to you guys.
Oh, fat?
Yeah.
And people die early or what?
How long are people living over there in Malaysia?
Put up a, bring up a corp.
I think, I think a website.
Bring up a link.
We love our sugary foods.
We love our fatty foods.
That's why.
People fat.
fat dying.
Yeah.
Fat dying.
That'd be a name of somebody I feel like.
Fat dying.
Fat dying.
That's a Vietnamese name.
P-H-A-T-D-A-E-N-G or something.
Fat-D-D-A-N-G or something.
Malaysia.
76 years in Malaysia.
What's the American average lifespan?
I feel like you beat us.
Our healthcare system is better, though.
Well, so...
I'll tell you about in a second.
It might even out.
77.
Oh.
Okay.
So one year longer?
It's an eight months longer.
But still, enough to point and laugh, you know?
Your final years.
Yeah.
We won.
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What was one of the biggest myths
over the years about the Malaysian flight?
Was there something that was like,
did people think it had gone to like a certain place
or was it always just a missing plane?
I'm trying to...
I think there are lots of theories, right?
And some people say they just entered
the Bermuda Triangle and they're all still alive.
But yeah, I think they're all dead.
He just drove the plane until he ran out of gas.
And it just sunk into the ocean.
Everybody was unconscious, though, so they didn't have that really scary moment, right?
That's nice.
I think it's like a less tragic situation than 9-11.
You know, 9-11, they were all conscious.
They knew they were flying into that building.
Yeah.
Right.
And some people were probably trying to hurry up and get their luggage because I hate it when people get up on a plane early before at lance stops or whatever.
Yeah.
You think they're out ruffling through the overhead storage?
Oh, some hurried ass, some business assholes.
Like, I got to get off first.
It's like, bitch, we're fucking.
Yeah, we're dead.
Yeah, it's just crazy
But you can
I hate when people
Get up early
Before the plane
Is like at the gate
You know
Yeah
And then the flight attendant
Has to tell you
Please sit down
The seatbelt light
Still on
Yeah
I know
Do you fly a lot
When you tour
Around the US
Oh yeah
Or just a big
The
My conception
My concept of
U.S.
Touring is a big
A ass tour bus
With your face
On the side of it
Oh no face
No face
No I think
That would be too ego
I think I wouldn't
Want my face
Because I don't want
People to know
Like
I don't want people
Come in and looking
for me or, you know, you already have at night, they'll have some, if you do a show in a town,
sometimes they'll be in a tour bus. Yeah, yeah. And see if you bring up. You can put your face
on a different bus. Oh, that's a good idea. You ride a nondescript bus. You put your face at a different
bus. Just like the LA City Transit bus just, you're just riding around. It's just like a greyhound
bus like going through Mississippi. It's like, follow us to the next show and you get there. And it's just
A bunch of like people who just get out of prison.
Yeah.
Getting off and ham in Louisiana.
Joe Koi has his face on a bus.
Yo Koi has his face on it.
Have you had him on the pot?
He's the other leader of Asian people.
Yeah, yeah.
We definitely have had him on.
Joe Koi's special guy.
Special guy, special guy, Joe Koe.
Yeah.
Josep.
Joseph?
Good guy.
Yeah.
There we are right there with the tour bus.
Yeah, we do like.
Oh, nice.
Yeah, a lot of times it's just a tour bus.
Very under the radar.
Nothing really crazy.
On the inside or outside.
We were on a pretty lean ship for the most part.
Yeah, when I was on tour in the U.S., I just flew to every city.
Did you?
I didn't even go with an opener.
On tour, I would open for myself.
Uncle Roger was my opener.
Oh, really?
So I save a bit of money that way.
So Uncle Roger is your assumed character, kind of.
It's like another character, but it's just you.
Yeah, it's just me.
I would speak of a stronger accent and I'm a little bit grumpier.
But you don't wear, you're not wearing a mustache or a cape or anything.
I wear an orange polo.
Yeah.
That's it.
Best Uncle Roger.
And it just took off because it came a, you know, if you want to see someone,
Uncle Roger mostly complains about food, right?
Yeah.
And mostly about Asian food, like fried rice and those things.
And if you want to see someone complain about Asian food,
it better be someone like extremely Asian, right?
That adds the authenticity and the comedy of it.
Yeah.
So that's why I took off the food stuff.
Yeah.
But yeah, he's just me with an orange polo, stronger accent.
You know, when I do Uncle Roger's portion in my tour,
is like my old material.
I just let the character do it.
Oh, yeah.
People love it.
That's me.
Yeah.
Orange polo.
But, you know,
the bar for character comedy on YouTube
is very low.
Yeah, that's a good point.
Just put a shirt.
You just put a shirt.
You just put a shirt.
Dr. Phil is higher effort
than whatever this is.
Oh, yeah, dude.
It just seemed like the best guy
at Home Depot, you know?
Like a student.
You look like a student.
at Home Depot.
Oh, thank you.
It's very great, man.
Yeah, people love Uncle Roger
and people love learning
about different food through him.
I think that's one thing.
Did you, in Malaysia,
there's a, I noticed when I was there
is a big monkey issue, right?
It's a big monkey.
Depends where you go.
In the city, that's fine.
You probably went to this place
called Batu Caves.
It's like a cave,
a Hindu cave.
And then when you walk up,
the steps, there are monkeys
who would just steal food from you.
Right.
Yeah.
Yeah, that sounds like a monkey issue.
Yeah.
So what I'm saying is,
do y'all eat
have you ever had monkeys?
No, no, no.
I know some Asians do.
Really?
You know?
I think maybe China's.
I've heard, and I don't know how true this is,
but in some places,
I believe it too, man.
They would just have a table with a hole in the middle,
and then the monkey's head
would be just coming through that hole,
and they would just cut open the monkey's head
and eat their monkey's brain
as the monkey's still alive
and just squiggling under the table.
Yeah, yeah.
I don't know how true that is,
but I'd like to believe that.
We eat everything.
I love that.
Yeah.
I love thinking about...
It's a bit inhumane, though, right?
It's the next level to the snail mucing stuff.
Right, but monkeys are...
They deserve some of it.
No, they're nice.
They're nice.
They're smart.
They're smarter.
Yeah, I agree.
Every now and then you see one who fucking, you know,
knows how to open bag of Dorito or something.
Yeah, they can paint.
But overall, they're...
They're...
They're five.
Put monkeys attacking woman for chips.
Well, that's bias.
You can also Google.
Google monkeys being cute and loving.
Okay.
Let's see both.
We'll do a video for each.
The woman who was mauled by a 200 pound chip.
Okay.
That's not a monkey.
That's like King Kong.
I'm just saying this lady probably had a little bit of chips on her.
I watched some monkeys attack a sister for a sack of vinegar salt chips one time on a stairwell.
Okay.
I need to know more context.
Okay.
So go to his version now.
What do you want to pull up?
monkeys being cute
monkeys being cute
in Malaysia
yeah let's do that
okay let's see that
oh that's a beautiful monkey
oh look like he's doing black face
the monkey looks like it's in black face
no
okay yeah we have a monkey problem
we have racist fucking monkeys
yeah look at this monkey dude
wow
bro look at this
who is that
oh that's Justin Trudeau
Look, look
He's not running for office
He's swinging for office from his tail
But that is cute
Come on, he's not attacking no one
No, that's a prime minister
Of course not
Yeah, yeah
That's hilarious
Look at this
Here we have
Come on
Oh beautiful monkey
Yeah, it's so tiny
That monkey can't beat anyone
Very romantic
What made you decide
To go into a food direction
on your YouTube, man.
And some of my audience won't be familiar with
Nigel or Uncle Roger,
and that's okay, right?
But it's, the way you kind of effortlessly
kind of just like, I think
you seem, this is what it is to me,
and this is very judgmental.
All right, here we go.
I'm used to seeing some Asian people
be more probably quiet
or not have maybe the similar sense of humor.
Uh-huh.
And I think your humor seems very similar
and relatable to just somebody like me.
Oh, thank you.
So, yeah, and I don't mean it.
Like, it's a judgment because it's like, well, what does that matter, right?
But I think that's why it seems so, like your humor.
Sometimes I feel like maybe some Asian humor I wouldn't get it.
Or even if it's an Asian person with American humor, I wouldn't get it as much.
But yeah, yours just seems so like effortless and comes across, man.
I feel like every kind of family has an Uncle Roger type character, right?
This person who likes to talk shit.
There's no-it-all who likes to talk shit, loudmouthed person who just roasting everyone.
Oh, yeah.
I think every culture has someone like that.
Maybe pedophile or none?
No, no pedophile.
Okay.
Keep it, keep it, PG.
Okay, fine, whatever, man.
I don't know, whatever.
I'm just asking what the question is.
Do they have pedophiles in Malaysia, though?
They have or no?
Yeah, of course.
Okay.
Yeah, they start young.
Sometimes they start young.
Sometimes it's allowed, too.
Oh, really?
They're different cultures, I think.
Sometimes they marry really young and...
Like the Burmese or whatever?
The Burmese, I don't know what specific Asian culture is.
But I know of other people who are in Malaysia
who marry a 14-year-old.
It's rare.
And it's very frowned upon and illegal, I think.
I don't know the Malaysian constitution that well.
But yeah, every country has a pedophile problem, man.
It's just that I think in the U.S.,
your pedophiles are higher profile.
They're successful pedophiles here.
Yeah, that's crazy.
It's like, well, this guy's great at business.
What's his secret?
And his secret is pet and kids or whatever.
You're like, well, that's, you know,
I'll just do a vitamin D supplement or whatever.
You have a whole island, you know, you have Epstein.
Yeah, we had Epstein.
It's great.
We don't have someone like that.
Asia consent, Malaysia, 16.
China, 14, okay.
Japan, 13.
13.
Whoa, hold on.
Lower Bob.
That's insane, dude.
India, or get back to 18, and South Korea is doing 16.
Thailand, 15.
legal, 18, effective.
What does effective mean?
Bahrain, 21.
Wow.
I like that.
Pedophiles need to move away from Bahrainian pedophiles need to move to Japan.
Yeah.
Blame it on Bahrain, brother.
Wow.
Yeah.
Oh, why talk about food?
So you got into food, yes.
Your channel seems like it kind of really started to focus more on food.
Yeah.
I grew up, growing up, I think most Malaysians, most Asians love food and we have opinions,
a lot of opinions on food and where the best thing is and what is the best fried rice, for instance,
you know? So during COVID, I remember I went full-time stand-up comedy, September 2019,
so six months before COVID hit. I was like, finally, I saved off enough money, I got enough
paying gigs that I can make a living off of stand-up. And then COVID hit six months later. I lost all
my work. So I had to be like, okay, I have all this time on my hands. What do I do? You know,
have this idea for this character in my head.
And then one day somebody sent me that very first video,
the BBC food, this woman making egg fight rice.
And I was just watching and I was just like,
this is horrendous.
This is horrible.
So let's put that character idea with this reaction video,
YouTube idea, and then things just took off from there.
So, and I realized food is relatable to Asian people,
to everyone, right?
Fright rice, everybody's had fright rice before.
White, Asian and black,
it doesn't matter what race you are.
Everybody likes it.
Yeah, everybody likes it.
Everybody has had it.
Everybody has an opinion on it.
Is there fried rice crispy treats or no?
No, we can start one, though.
That's a good idea.
Fright rice crispy treats for a little packet.
I like that, huh?
Yeah, but it's too sweet, though.
Maybe it can come out with a savory one.
Yeah, that is the BBC food egg, fried rice video.
The one that I reacted to.
And what is it?
Yeah.
Who is that?
Her name's Hershap Patel.
We did a video together.
Wow.
She was just, you know,
know, like a collateral damage.
She was just a presenter.
And the BBC gave her this recipe.
And Hersha, she's got her pronouns are heavy in her first name.
Her shot.
Oh, wow.
So she does a lot of bizarre things, you know, like.
I don't care.
I would buy her a damn omelet somewhere.
Yeah, he's making the rise.
And so what is she?
This is your, you know her?
I, yeah.
After the video went viral and she got a lot of hate messages.
About this video?
Yeah.
For making bad rice.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
This is like a Megan Markle effect or whatever.
Yeah.
Something's.
And then I realized my videos where I critique when I roast celebrity chefs or I critique food, those go really viral.
They do super well.
And then after doing it for a few more years, I was like, okay, people trust me when I talk about food.
Because I try to keep it honest if the food is good.
I say it's good.
If it's bad, I say it's bad.
So that's why I think I can make, you know, do some good business in the food world.
That's why now I have restaurants, I'm writing a cookbook, all that stuff.
And it's fun, man.
It's like fun.
You know, I've done the, I love stand-up still.
I just don't have a time to do it anymore.
And I'm taking a break from it because I realized I'm not, I wasn't devoting enough time to it.
You know, at most I could do two sets a week.
And that's not enough.
That's not enough.
You get, you feel so rusty.
The first 10 minutes of your set, you're getting rid of that rush.
and you can't really get better.
So maybe one day when things settled down a bit,
I'll get back to stand up because I love it.
It's just that, you know,
that instant reaction from people.
Yeah.
Well, it's also, you know, it's funny, I think how if you try,
like, was it scary to try your first,
that first kind of food video?
Because it's interesting for an entertainer
if you're in a certain world or space, right?
It's interesting to then try something different.
You're like, well, my friend does this and it's really neat.
He does it super well.
but if I do it,
is mine going to be okay?
Are people going to perceive it as okay?
Right?
I think that's a big fear.
You know,
I have friends that do great sketches.
Like Shane Gillis does some really great sketches.
Like his,
I've seen it.
Yeah,
Gillian Keeves.
Oh,
I love that.
Ice is Toyota sketch.
Some of it is just so,
so funny.
And there's times where it's like,
I'll think of a great sketch.
I'll write it on my phone.
And I'm like,
well, if I did that,
would it be okay?
Would I be too,
but it's like,
I think you think,
like that, right? It's normal. It's normal. It's normal thing like that, but nobody cares,
dude. Right, that's the truth, right? Yeah. But then, I don't know. If somebody saw somebody doing something
like a bunch, you're like, oh, this isn't the avenue for them. But then if you're, if you have a good
instinct for yourself, you would kind of notice that as well. Here's what I'm asking you, was it hard to do that?
Was it hard to just take that leap and be like, I'm going to try this different thing? Oh, yeah.
Yeah. You fear, I fear the judgment of every back, because back then in the UK, nobody was doing
YouTube, you know.
It was just a weird thing for someone to do,
for a stand-up to do.
People, other stand-ups would be like,
oh, he's just a YouTuber, you know?
Yeah, remember that?
It was like a slur, right?
Yeah, YouTube-ah.
Yeah, YouTuber, ugh.
But.
No hard R on it.
YouTube-up.
Yeah, that's crazy, dude.
YouTube, please.
Yeah, dude.
Oh, have you heard that song?
YouTubeers can be gay too.
Yeah.
Have you heard it?
No.
I watch it right.
You got to hear this song.
It's great.
It's just like a, it's a summer bop that's really taken over, and then we'll get back to this.
Hell yeah.
What a banger.
This is that banger, bro.
We got to remix this shit for the summer, dude.
Yeah.
Very hard to sing along.
That's in your car.
He can say this in your car.
Yeah.
Yeah, you just say this to your friend.
He's not wrong, though.
They can't be gay.
I support this guy.
Yeah.
Hey, this guy has a vote for me, bro.
It needs to be said.
Yeah.
There's too much toxic masculinity in that N-word community sometimes.
Yeah.
You've got to let the air out the tire a little.
That's what I'm saying.
Boy, sometimes the best seasoning gives a little bit of zest.
Yeah.
Who likes that zesty barbecue?
They snuck it in on us.
They snuck it in on us with that zes.
dusty barbecue.
But let's go back to what you were saying.
Sorry.
Anytime I get a chance,
I love this artist,
Eves,
and so I just want to be able to support him
and put out his song that I think is a banger
and has not gotten the
vibes it should have gotten so far.
And it just needs to be resurrected
because there's been about eight years
since that song came out.
What is,
I wonder,
in Asian culture even,
because Asian culture to me, right?
And I know I relate things to culture a lot,
but I think it's played a big role in my life, I think, somehow.
But Asian people seem more reserved overall, right?
We kind of talked about that.
Yeah.
So is that even scarier to put yourself out there in Asians,
like as an Asian you think,
than it would be in other cultures where it's more like boisterous, you know?
I never thought about this.
I think it would be, you know?
In the U.S., I think people here like it when you're being creative,
at least they're supportive, you know, like you go, you do you.
Yeah, yeah.
More positive here.
Can be gay too, man, you know.
If you try to put it as that song in Malaysia, Asians can be gay too.
That's not going to go far.
Come on, dude.
I think in some countries, that would be illegal as well.
Oh, yeah.
Asians can be gay too.
Muslims can be gay too.
Dude, that song needs a remake in every culture.
Yeah, so I just wondered if it was even scarier and what, like, I guess, what got you
that what made you kind of brave enough to take that,
to take that leap?
Because in my life, I've noticed that the,
the toughest thing is just that first step every time.
Well, I went to university here, and that helped.
I went to Northwestern, and it's, you know,
I was very lucky I got a scholarship because it's an expensive school.
But a lot of people who go there are, like,
very upper middle class,
mostly white Midwestern kids.
Oh, yeah, fancy.
They're all so confident.
And even though they have the exact wrong answer,
but they're still like, just saying it with their chest.
You're talking about being a cap of SIG, dude, I think.
Something like that.
I wasn't very popular with the frat people.
They have their own culture, right?
When you talk about culture, frat, it's its own culture.
Oh, yeah.
They like to vomit on each other until somebody's secretly gay.
You know what I'm saying, dude?
That's the type shit I'm into.
Type shit, boy.
Shout out Pikes, pill gang.
Can you still do those things, the hazing rituals?
It's just sexual assault, but on people, on your friends.
I didn't know vomit could be a lubricant, but hey, here's another bush light, Ricky.
Yeah, they're just so, and I see them just bullshit their way through university.
I was like, I need some of that.
I need some of that white male confidence.
Not too much.
You have too much, you become annoying and entitled, right?
Yeah, 20% of it, just a little bit.
Not too much.
Yeah, you don't want to turn into Chet Hanks or whatever.
He went to our school.
Did he?
Northwestern.
Let's go.
Nice, man.
He came to see it.
I was in a black sketch comedy group back in university.
Chad Hanks and Tom Hanks were at our show once.
And Rita Wilson, Tom, Tom's wife.
And they all came to your show?
Yeah, they came to the show.
It was me and a group of people.
Black folks?
Yeah, mostly black folks.
They always need one Asian guy and one white person.
So that was a token.
He was a token.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We got the past 80 N word in certain sketches.
You did?
Cool.
Yeah.
Oh, wow.
They're doing that at Northwestern?
Yeah, yeah.
Hell, yeah.
That's what the end stands for, Northwestern, dude.
that's what I'm talking about.
That's what we need more of.
Dude, I've said this for years.
And not for years, but I've said this for almost four months.
If you had, if you auctioned off the N-word, say somebody's going to say it, right?
Like tonight, Uncle Roger's going to drop the N-bomb at 11 p.m., right?
But you auctioned it off.
You say, I'm going to donate money to watch the stream.
I'm going to pay.
They say it, and the money goes towards like a black organization.
Yeah.
I think that would work.
I think that's a good idea.
Yeah.
But do you have limitations in how they say it?
No, I think they just get, they have to say it within three or four minutes.
So they could do like a little bit of a dance ensemble and then say it at the end.
Like da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-dha.
You know?
Hard-R or no hard R?
I think it's up to them and I think it's at what price level you pay.
Like say Angelina Jolie is going to drop that thing, right?
Okay.
I mean.
I would tune in to watch that.
I think more people would like that than that fucking imagine song that they did a few years ago.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, imagine N-words.
That's what I'm saying, dude.
That's what they need to do.
So I'm just saying, because people are always talking about reparations this, reparations that.
Mm-hmm.
But you're out here policing people for the N-word, organize.
That's a great idea.
And make some money for your community by auctioning it.
People are already saying it.
Yeah, for free.
That's no problem.
Dude, I love this.
This is like the United Nations meeting, dude.
Let's start a Twitch stream, okay?
Yeah, dude.
And tonight?
Yeah.
Who would be the best that you would love to hear say the N-word?
And let's be honest.
And this isn't a racial thing.
This is just about vernacular and raising money for a community.
I want to see Trevor Wallace say the N-word.
Yeah, because he does not say it.
But he looks like he wants to say it sometimes.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, if you tickle him?
Yeah.
Oh.
I bet he says it is asleep.
This is sleep talking.
Sorry, Trevor.
Oh, yeah.
He puts the end in ambient, dude.
You know what I'm talking about?
What's up, Kyle?
Dude, that would be so great.
Yeah, I love to see that.
Yeah, I would love to see Trevor Wallace.
And then who's someone that's older
that I would love to see, say it?
Someone who's probably like in a coma or something,
but if you could get them to whisper it or something
for like an expensive stream.
I'm talking like about a $13, $14 stream.
Who's somebody?
Look up older people in coma as celebrities
or people on their struggling, something like that.
Old people who are struggling.
Put almost RIP.
you can put on there.
Oh,
Clint Eastwood.
Oh,
hey,
that'll be a legend.
He did it for first.
Huh?
That'll be legendary.
He says it already.
Yeah,
he did it for fun.
There's like three movies
about him almost saying it up.
Oh,
Buzz Aldrin,
definitely, dude.
Yeah.
Bro.
Is he the guy who went to the moon?
Yeah,
you know if you're out in space,
you got to yell it out there once.
Yeah, nobody can hear it.
Only Houston can hear it.
We call the pro.
problem.
Houston, we have a problem.
Yeah.
Paul Wall, baby.
I'm the people's champ.
We got a problem, Hughes.
And Buzz is racist.
Really racist.
You don't think a white guy named Buzz
was driving in bombs?
After a few whiskeys.
After a few whiskeys and fake trips to the moon,
you don't think he's driving a fucking inbound.
First of all, if you send me to a fake moon
and drug me up and send me to a fake moon,
I get one in bomb, man.
He could open up for Angelina Jolie.
But it's just good to think about how you can raise money.
And that's where I'm at.
It's like, you know, are we raising money or not?
Yeah.
I wish we had such a cool, like, racial slur for Asian people.
You know, we got chink, but it's nowhere near the cultural coolness.
Yeah, I'm trying to think of chop dogs would be good.
Chop dogs.
But that's kind of fun.
Yeah.
That's funny.
That's funny to say.
Look at my chop dogs right here.
Yeah, look at best Asian racial slurs if you can.
Sorry.
That's probably on X, not on YouTube.
Best Asian slurs.
Yeah, at Elon.
If you can, we're going to need...
Excuse me, Grock.
Do you know if these slurs are definitely Asian?
Let's just look at a couple.
I don't want to get crazy.
Yeah.
Have you had Elon on the pod?
I have not.
Mama son, Mongoloid.
I thought that was for, like, Down syndrome people.
Not for Asian.
That's just redneck people who don't know how to say...
Mongolia.
Mongolia.
Yeah, I have some mongoloid beef
Look, I ate so much of it
I can't even fucking read that well anymore
My forehead got bigger
After eating some mongolite beef
My eyes got sunken in
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Oh my God, we gotta get out of here, dude
Dude, you know what you need to do
Is do a show with my friends
Over there in Australia when you go
Which one?
Sean and Marley
Oh, these guys?
Yeah
Yeah, I've done like some reactions
to chefs with
Down syndrome and they're great
They can cook
These guys are the best
One of them doesn't have Down syndrome
One of them does
I'm not even sure
But you go to their home
The greatest experience I had in Australia
Was spending time with these guys at their home
And went to their homes
Yes
And you pull up dude
It was just unbelievable
But that would be an amazing crossover
That's you
Oh nice
And they would love to have you there man
I've worked with Down syndrome kids before
I used to volunteer Down syndrome
Factory or whatever
That's just a agent
And that's a job
That's because a lot of this one of Asian factory work.
I didn't think it was funny.
Yeah, the most joyful people.
Oh, for sure.
Dude, you tickle them.
They can't even feel it because they're already feeling that good.
Isn't that crazy?
Yeah.
Is that true?
Yeah.
They're already feeling at a level of being tickled.
Oh, I didn't know that.
How'd you find out about that fact?
Oh, that's easy one.
Is that a grok?
Question as well.
That's grok.
Do Down syndrome people feel tickles?
I'm not with that.
You're going to.
jail, dude. You're definitely going to jail.
Did Rocket Money cancel a subscription for you that would have been time consuming or confusing
to cancel? It did for me. I was latched on a, I was paying for something, bacon buck or
bacon bundle or something where they just dang hit you with a month full of bacon at first week
at a month. And Rock, I forgot about it. I'm over here just dang. Whole home smells like pork,
but Rocket Money figured it out and put it to an end.
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I need it again.
I need a good friend.
I need somebody to listen, right?
I think that's something we all need.
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slash Theo
I was a Middle East trip, man.
I was watching the clip of you doing that show.
That must be a tough crowd when you did good.
Oh, it's nice you to say that.
You're being very nice.
That show was hard.
I'll tell you what.
So they weren't supposed to be recording the show.
That was part of the agreement,
was there would be no recording.
And I get out there,
and then there's 20 news cameras.
Oh, shit.
And so I'm like, well, what do I do now?
Like, you know, I can't just do all my material because then it'll just be out there, right?
It's like, and I'm trying to maybe do a special at some point.
And then, so that was a...
Nice.
Yeah, those are thobes, right?
Okay.
Thobb.
That's Qatar, right?
Qatar, yeah.
And it was so cool, man.
But, yeah, so I get out there.
And then there's an audience in front of me, behind me, and to this side of me.
And half of each one of them can't speak.
English.
They still laughed.
I heard laughs.
I heard applause breaks.
People, I think a lot of that they were...
You made fun of the Navy.
They loved it.
Oh, yeah.
That part was...
The best part was calling him
Clu Klux Sandsman.
That was my favorite.
That was the only thing.
And at that point,
I was like, at least, if anything,
they flew somebody over here to say that.
Yeah.
That must be a tough crowd.
It feels like a corporate crowd, but tougher.
Well, I just didn't expect the camera.
So suddenly, everything has to change.
You're like,
what do I do?
do now. I can't, you know. And so it was just like this interesting mix. But then I also like,
before I went out there, I was like asking God, I was like, just don't make it about me. Let me just
try and do my best. Like, you know, so I, and then I realize it's just you're over there to have
fun. So we stayed after and took a ton of photos. And it was cool, man, just to be on the base and see
like, you know, I've done some military tours in the past, but just to be there and just see what
people, just what people are living like over there and what the environment is like over there.
Yeah.
And then we got to drive across town and all the buildings have, bring up like a basic or what's it
called common structure structuring in Qatar.
All of their stuff have like the castle, like, you know that like castles are kind of like
that on the top of them.
Let me see.
I don't fully understand.
Like you know the rook in when you're playing.
A rook is a castle.
Yeah.
The rook is the castle.
So it has the castle top.
You know how the top of the castle is like that?
All of their buildings there are like that.
Oh, really?
Wow.
So you'll be driving by a place and you're like, oh my God, is that a palace?
And I'm like, that's a KFC, dude.
Every building there has the castling tops.
And it's all very uniform and there's nothing out of place.
There's not a tree out of place.
There's not a curve of a sidewalk out of place.
Nothing's on.
It's like, it's unbelievable.
They have a lot of money because everybody there gets subsidized from the government if you're a Qatari citizen.
Yeah, but it's impossible to be a Qatari citizen, isn't it?
Right.
It only travels through the mail.
So you can't just have a baby on the land and it's a citizen.
Yeah.
Can you be gay and marry a male and get it that way?
Let's see.
That's a great question because you always hear that you can't be gay there or whatever.
And it's funny, they had the secret service there and I kept going up to it and I'm like, what's your secret?
If you're gay
Just say if you're gay
What's your secret
You wore your mom's
Underpants like what is it
And every time
Every time
Would slightly show me a gun
Just like
Shut the fuck up
And then that's when I would listen
To N words can be gay too
Just a fucking
Let's play that in that years
Pathways to Katari citizenship
Citizenship is automatically granted
Anyone born to a Katari father
Regardless a birthplace
Oh interesting
Children of Qatari mothers and non-Katari fathers may apply for citizenship, but only under strict conditions are not guaranteed citizenship.
Foreigners can apply for citizenship after at least 25 consecutive years of lawful residents.
Wow.
With no more than two months spent outside the country per year.
Oh my God, with no more than two months spent outside the country per year.
Whereas in America, you could hang your lower half over a fence and drop something over here and it's American.
Yeah.
Which is kind of cool, actually.
I think there's that golden visa, I think, in America now, right?
$5 million or something?
They're giving that away.
I think America's got citizenship.
I think Howie Mandel is one of the hosts of it.
But dual citizenship is not permitted.
Applicants must renounce their previous citizenship upon naturalization.
I think that's important.
So you can't be gay.
Oh, wait, legal status of same-sex marriage.
Same-sex marriage, civil unions, and domestic partnerships are not recognized or legal in Qatar.
Qatari law influenced by traditional Islamic principles
criminalizes same-sex sexual activity
and does not recognize any legal status
for same-sex couples.
Cohabitation outside of heterosexual marriage is also illegal.
Wow.
So there's no way for us to be Qatari citizens.
In our next life, I believe in reincarnation.
I'll meet you there, brother.
See you there, man.
Play our song.
That's perfect.
What is the
What's the improper way to cook rice
Just for whites and listeners of this?
That's when I built my whole career off of it.
Is it really?
I think the proper way is just get a rice cooker.
Yeah.
You have one of those?
No, I lived with an Asian girl
When I first moved to Los Angeles, we...
She needs to educate you on that stuff, man.
Oh, we couldn't even afford heat.
Sometimes we'd have her turn that on in our room for a little while.
Oh, shit.
But now things are different now, right?
You can afford a rice cooker now.
Oh, yeah, I can have a rice cooker in each room.
Yeah.
You can just be making rice.
You can have an Asian in each room making rice for you.
That's how what you can afford now.
I would love that.
A little cinnamon Asian.
Got the sugar book person.
Yeah.
$80 a week.
Just come make rice for me, girl.
But a rice cooker is great because it just takes care of everything for you.
And when it's done, it keeps it warm.
So you can just press play, go out, do your thing, come back.
Rice is ready.
That's it.
And it smells good.
It's perfect.
So doing anything crazy with rice where you're boiling, all that.
It's kind of ridiculous.
You can just do a rice cooker easy.
Yeah, because every time in the West, okay, here's a difference.
In Asia, you ask someone how to make rice.
They're like, rice cooker, the story is over.
Over here, I ask someone how to make rice.
They give you this long mathematical equation with science
and how many cups of water to one to three ratio of rice to water
is a whole science lab breaking bad project.
Yeah, it's like Andrew Huberman making rice.
Yeah, like we don't need that.
a whole podcast to make one bowl of rice.
Yeah.
You know, so I recommend everybody, just get a rice cooker.
You know, make life easy for yourself.
Yeah, make it simple.
Just do that.
Do you cook a lot at home?
I only eat two things, honestly.
At home, smoothie.
Okay.
I eat one smoothie that has blueberries, spinaches, walnut.
But that's eating, though.
That's not eating.
Protein powder.
Okay.
And food?
What about food?
milk, a little bit of cinnamon, half teaspoon of Stamets mushroom powder, some arm-rah, armora,
colostrum.
What else?
Oh, half a teaspoon of algae, sea algae powder.
That's fine grain, fine grain.
I don't like that choppy shit.
What is, what's colostrum?
Armour, it's something that, it's in baby milk.
Is it placenta?
Oh, it's something in baby milk?
Oh, okay.
I love, is it good for you?
I mean, was baby milk good for you?
you? Probably. I don't remember now.
Oh, you imagine that? Yeah. I need to ask my mom.
Was that healthier when I was sucking in your tit?
I'm sure I was. Did look at me now.
Fucking trouble. I'm fucking spray tanning my back because I'm losing pigment.
God damn, yeah.
Just getting wider and wider.
I love that damn baby milk tit in milk.
Gloucrum.
Why did you get? That looks like an air wand thing, isn't it?
They started dealing. I think we actually do, I think we honestly, I think we even do some ads for them.
But so I mixed out together in a blender, that is my, that's my smoothie.
That's what I have every time.
And then other than that, sometimes at night, about 45 minutes for bed, I'll make myself a ground beef, a cassidia.
Okay.
Okay.
You've got to expand your palate, man.
Give it a try.
I don't want that.
I'll bring you around.
I'll bring you to the Korea town.
But why is it, every time Asians, they want to take you somewhere to fucking feed you?
That's the thing.
Yeah.
We don't like cooking at home.
Oh, really?
Because cooking, there's so much good food here.
The cooking at home is almost arrogant.
You think like what?
You think you can do better?
than this place, you know.
So I got to bring you somewhere.
Create some joy,
let you see some shit.
Fouio, that's your restaurant?
Fouio, yeah, yeah.
Fouio, it's Uncle Roger.
That's the restaurant name.
Congratulations, dude.
Thank you, man.
It's so awesome.
That's only in Malaysia right now.
Hopefully you will expand this concept
to all of Asia.
But later this year, hopefully,
we also have something,
a new concept opening in London.
Really?
Yeah.
different,
oh, this is the first time
I'm saying it to the world, shit.
But yeah, we have,
we just got the lease
for a place in London.
Let's go.
Uncle Rugia.
Yeah.
Thank you.
Fuio is like a Malaysian slang
for saying,
fuck yeah.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, yeah.
Nice.
Fuio.
Foyo.
Yeah, I love that, dude.
It's so cool.
And when you went there
for the first time,
did you have to go
and help design the actual restaurant?
How did that?
How hands on are you
in something like that, right?
Certain aspects.
I came up with a few of the fried rice recipes.
So Fuyo, it's Uncle Roger,
is a fast casual fried rice restaurant.
Okay.
So you get fried rice as your base
so you can add toppings to it.
Oh, it sounds so good.
Oh, it's good, man.
We are very proud of our fried rice.
And I came up with a few of the recipes,
you know, this is a kimchi fried rice.
So I decided, yes, we need some seaweed.
We decide how we want to plate it.
You know, the seaweed on the side and the perimeter.
And how you want to chop the spring onion.
There are many ways to chop spring onion.
You've got to find the perfect way.
Yeah, yeah.
It's all a little, like, bright colored and a little, a little corny from a western eye,
but it works for Asia, and we like cutesy things, and also a lot of kids like it, younger people like it.
Yeah, it's fun.
Well, also, I think getting younger people to like, especially like younger American people to like,
just to try something a little bit different, right?
Yeah.
Like, I think my nephews would love this kind of thing, man.
Look at an egg, man.
Look at how runny it is.
Oh, that's good, huh?
So that's another decision to make.
You've got to make the sides crispy and the yolk.
That's what Asians like.
Foo, you're going to add some eggs to your diet, man.
Oh, fool, yeah.
Add some runny eggs to your cassadilla,
to your ground beef, casadia.
I do very, I do a little bit of cheese on there,
shredded cheese,
cassidia.
And that's real?
That's the two things you eat every day?
It's the only thing that.
For real, you're not joking.
It's the only thing is it's at my house to eat
and the only thing is it's at my apartment team.
Oh, wow.
So I have that, put a cheese,
put a layer of ground beef.
One more layer of cheese.
Take some salt, sea salt,
Put it on there, top on it, one napkin over it in the microwave.
Probably a minute, 15 seconds.
When it comes out, I push down on the napkin to strengthen that cheese and that meat combo.
Put it all together, make it a team.
Then I'll cut it.
A second I take that napkin off, I cut it four.
One across one of the bottom, make four pieces.
Do not let it get too cold.
Brother gets bad.
I need to open a restaurant here, man.
So you're going to experience a joy of eating.
Oh, I would love that, man.
I would love to be associated with your restaurant.
Part of, part of why I took a break from stand-up
is because it eats into my dinner time.
That's how much I like food.
It's real, man.
Right, you do a show on tour.
It's like, I have to sound check at like five,
and then I'm stuck in the green room
and just eating a cold salad.
And then after the show, you just want to drink.
You don't want to eat.
Yeah, you're a little bit heightened up.
And then otherwise, you're eating at like 11 o'clock at night.
That's never super fun.
No good restaurants still open at 11.
Nothing.
Yeah.
Even if you try to set up something in advance, you know,
know, it won't stay open sometimes.
But you can order food.
But yeah, it's touring is, it's a hectic lifestyle.
Yeah.
How do you stay fit when you're always eating?
Do you also have to take care of yourself or do you want to get turned into fat?
No, I think I got to take care of myself, man.
I wanted my life expectancy to go a little, a little beyond that.
So I just work out.
I try to, I try to let my dinner be my all-out meal.
Every dinner is my cheat meal.
but every other meal is like a healthy thing.
I try.
I try.
And do you eat breakfast?
Do Malaysians eat breakfast?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We got some good breakfast, man.
I think best breakfast in the world,
we've got rice for breakfast.
See, that's the part.
I'm open to it.
I think you just, I would have to get it.
Just try it.
Search this,
search Nassi.
Yeah, Malaysian breakfast.
That's the first image.
That's the one we have.
So look at the variety.
Rice, peanuts.
The sambal paste, a red paste there,
fried chicken.
sometimes.
What's a sambaa paste?
It's like a chili shrimp paste.
You know?
It's, it tastes.
I'm getting hungry now.
I'm just thinking about this.
And those are sardines?
Huh?
Those are sardines?
Those are deep fried anchovies.
Oh.
Krispy.
I feel like this, the joy of this image is lost on you, Theo.
I could see that.
Yeah, look at that.
It's served on a banana leaf.
Look at how appetizing that is.
You know?
Look at that one.
The one from medium.
The one, yeah, that one.
This is an,
Another Malaysian breakfast.
This is more Indian Malaysian style.
I like this one.
You have the roti, the thin bread, slightly crispy and airy.
You dip it in that yellow doll.
Oh, yeah.
Ah, man.
Again, it beats any ground beef cassadia, man.
But in Qatar, they had a lot of beautiful sauces and stuff too.
Yeah, we love.
Sauce is what makes life worth living, you know?
Add that to your cholesterol smoothie or something.
You're right, dude.
I'm a fucking idiot.
What am I doing?
There's all this great food and I'm eating the same shit all the time.
fucking loser.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We should make a video.
Do you like,
maybe next time,
maybe you can make Uncle Roger your meal.
And then let him judge it.
No, I'm a little snack.
Dude,
I'm fucking losing my mind, bro.
You know?
I gotta get it together, man.
And we'll bleep that word out.
Sorry,
that was a little bit out of sorts.
Yeah.
And the shirt you're wearing, too,
that's the national flower of Malaysia.
You want to know more about Malaysia?
That's a hybiscus.
Is it?
Did you wear that for me?
To your respect, yeah.
Oh, thank you, man.
I'll take it.
Look at that.
Oh, that's beautiful.
Yeah.
We have a lot of respect for Asian culture here.
Thank you.
And I think we want to...
Thank you.
That's Japanese.
But, you know.
It is?
Yeah.
Howjima.
Huh?
Hajimimaste.
I don't know what that means.
I know one word.
Oh, our friendship begins.
That's what it means in Japanese.
Thank you.
Hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi.
I love the way they say thank you in Japan.
It just, they just bow at you.
Yeah.
The most polite Asian people.
I know.
You know?
Have you been there?
Have you toured there?
Beautiful.
Yeah, I've been to Japan.
I haven't toured there, though.
Oh, you should tour there.
I think you'll get a good crowd.
You'd think so?
An ex-pat crowd.
Yeah.
And then maybe a few, like, random Japanese people who got lost.
Yeah, yeah.
I saw a sign.
I like that a haircut.
I just end up with your show.
What?
Yeah, dude, the thing of, let's, what are some of the, like, some Asians get no credit,
the Laotians, right?
Yeah.
Laotian people.
I pissed them off one time.
Did you?
Because I said, what did I say?
Uncle Roger said,
Cambodian food is like a shit version of Thai food.
And they get mad when you insult their food, man.
Yeah, Laosians.
Yeah, Laosians and Cambodians.
Oh.
I still think it's, okay, maybe not Lao, but Cambodian food, yeah, it's kind of true in a way.
I think Thai people perfected that region's food.
You think so?
Yeah, because they took inspiration from the Lausian people, their own Thai people.
And Cambodia, you know,
You guys bombed them to shit.
So that's why they couldn't.
Yeah, that's why.
It's hard to eat with the bombing.
Yeah, I know.
It's hard to enjoy your noodles when there's a landmine next to you.
Don't drop the chopstick.
It's got to trigger the explosion.
Yeah, I've been to Cambodia.
Sometimes it makes me sad.
You've been to Cambodia?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I've been to, what's it called?
Angkor Wat.
That city of Africa.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And it's right next to Vietnam.
Yeah.
And is it makes you sad because of just the.
aftermath of the war there and stuff?
Yeah, aftermath of the war.
And you just see people who lost limbs.
Oh.
You know?
Because you plant, and there's still active landmines there.
So you never, you can't venture, you can't just venture off the path, you know?
The tour guy tells you, don't walk off the path.
Everybody's walking.
You might step on a landmine.
Oh.
Yeah.
Who has that song, Landmine?
Who is that?
Landmines can be gay too.
Pooh.
Jazz hands.
Oh, it's Bruno Mars?
Catch a grenade for you, that song?
Oh, yeah, that's what I'm thinking of Bruno Mars.
I'll catch a grenade for you.
Oh.
But, no, that is heartbreaking.
Can you bring that up?
Is that true?
How much landmines are still in Cambodia?
That's heartbreaking.
Yeah, it's your...
And did we put them there?
I think so.
I think what's the guy who, the president who passed away last year, I think.
Joe Biden?
No.
He's still kicking.
he's still kick i think
Jimmy Carter
oh Jimmy Carter yeah
Jimmy Carter was he the one who
there's somebody
I don't fully know that the history
I just know that you guys were
highly responsible
I'm sure let me see
millions of landmines
Cambodia is one of the most heavily landmine
contaminated countries in the world
with estimates ranging from
four to six million landmines
and unexploded ordinance scattered
across the country
at the
as of the end of 2022
Cambodia had identified 681 square kilometers of land contaminated with anti-personnel landmines.
God.
Yeah.
New areas of contamination are continually being discovered, making the precise number of landmines difficult to determine.
Click on that third article over there, Human Progress.
On February 2025, Prime Minister, Samdette de Hun Minute.
How do you say it?
I don't know.
Oh, damn.
Yeah.
Highlighted the remarkable achievements in Cambodia's ongoing mind clearing.
campaign over the past 32 years.
Since its inception in 1992,
the initiative has successfully cleared
nearly 3,300 square kilometers
of landmines. Man.
Yeah. They have more landmines
than you have, like, Starbucks is here.
Yeah, but I mean, it just puts hopscotch
on a whole new fucking level, huh?
Yeah. Advanced hopscots. It's high
stakes hopscotch. Just draw the lines.
Good luck.
Dude. This is horrible.
It's like a squid game over there.
Hopscotch squeak games.
All you need is,
It's like a simply safe camera set up on a tree over there to get your squid game season three.
Oh, yeah.
What is this, what Asian have the most, like a lot of Asians squint when they look, right?
Yeah, yeah.
Which Asian have the- I think every race squid when they look, come on.
You scream when you look too.
Oh yeah, I look a little Asian, man.
Yeah, you got a little Asian in you.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And what, but what Asian have the most squint?
Is there one that, like, what Asian has the one where you just want to put a couple quarters in their face,
you know what I'm talking about, type of shit?
type of shit, you know?
The squintiest Asians.
I don't know.
Maybe Mongolians because...
Bring them up.
Bring up a Mongol.
Yeah, because they have like really puffy cheeks in there.
Oh.
So it's a...
So it just pushed the cheeks, push the eyelids up maybe.
Oh, beautiful.
I love that.
Yeah.
Squintiest...
Let me see what you search.
Let me see the Google search.
Yeah, so the search, man.
What agents have the squintiest eyes.
I mean, that's going to get us in trouble, dude.
Oh, man.
I would love to be on this brainstorming session
when you guys had me on yesterday.
Brainstorming session.
Nigel's coming.
What can we ask him?
I don't know.
Ask him, we were afraid to say your name out loud.
Case this place is bugged by fucking Memphis PD, dude.
Yeah.
That's another GROC question.
Yeah, bringing up on GROC as well.
See if they can help us.
Some people say Japanese people
because the blast was so bright
it like that they have like a permanent sunglasses.
Well it like it was a lot for the community.
It's all heartbreaking, man.
Oh, it's a stereotype tied to East Asian populations.
It's not a stereotype if it's kind of true, right?
I don't know.
Bring up some wide-odd Asians in.
Let's see it because this could all be bullshit.
When I film myself on camera, I have to make sure the cameras position a certain way
if there's an emotion I want to convey because otherwise if I look down, it's just a slit.
Yeah.
You know, so I know I experienced that problem.
Ooh, this is beautiful.
Yeah, I think this is a stereotype, man.
We might want to get rid of that stereotype.
I don't know if that's true.
I think it's true, man.
What are common plastic surgeries that some Asians get in order to adjust themselves?
We make our eyes bigger.
Make our eyes bigger?
Yeah.
Look at the one lady's got one eye big and one eye regular.
Look at that.
Second row left, left.
Oh, that's makeup.
Nuh.
And I think contact lenses.
That's see, let's play it.
Let's play it.
Yeah, that's crazy.
Asian bring catfish to a whole new level.
Yeah.
Ooh.
It's like one of this Roershark church.
No.
You search like crazy Chinese makeup and you'll see it on TikTok.
But the beauty of it is, is how much, how artistic that Asians are.
Yeah, but it takes ages.
It takes so much time out of your day.
Yeah.
Asians, they call them.
Yeah.
Look at this woman just transformed.
Uh-uh.
Yeah.
Oh, Jim puts a fake nose on to make the nose slimmer.
Oh, look at this, huh?
Oh, it's Rob Schneider.
This is a joke, Rob.
Wow, this is really...
This is what Jeff Bezos' his wife does, you know?
This is crazy, bro.
This really happens?
I think this is a rare case, you know.
Yeah.
All of Rob, though, getting close, dude.
Yeah.
He's the after.
That's almost.
Dale King at least.
Yeah, he's the after, bro.
Rob just performed down in Louisiana was pretty cool.
What?
What else can we talk about?
How many episodes do you put out a week?
Three, four?
No, no, no, no.
One or two.
One or two.
We put out six a month.
Ah, okay.
So that's kind of where we're at in the space right now.
It's interesting because, you know, over time you start thinking like,
well, you start learning more stuff.
So then there's more stuff you want to talk about, right?
And then you start thinking, well, I want to, you know, if people are listening,
I want to introduce some of the things that I like that I think are neat, you know,
or people that it's like, oh, maybe they wouldn't know about, you know.
Like, if half of our audience doesn't know about you and they listen and they love you,
like, I've had a great time chatting, man.
It's been very fun.
Same.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
And I was like kind of worried.
I was like, I don't know what it's going to be like, but.
It's a normal guy, man.
You're hilarious, dude.
Thank you.
Thank you.
So funny, dude.
And so I'm like, yeah, I think it's.
just things like that and then I would like to be able to learn more stuff like have people in
to learn more you know we're trying to have a health care like a doctor from Gaza who's been
in like over there come on we're trying to have somebody come on about dopamine and like the
effects of like dopamine addiction and kind of where we are as like especially as men you know
being addicted and then um always jerking off we always talk about that kind of stuff and if we can
get better you got to get that guy who's trying to live forever that brian johnson
Yeah, we saw that guy.
Yeah.
I'm fascinated by him.
He's almost Korean, huh?
Yeah, he looks like it.
Everybody turns Asian after a while.
Ariana Grande, her latest look is Asian.
Oh, yeah, ASEAN, they call it in some places.
Asiana Grande.
Asiana Grande.
Yeah, look at this guy, definitely.
Yeah, he's turning into a K-pop star.
Oh, play our song again real quick.
Oh, Roger, Roger, Roger.
It's no bedtime.
It's no bedtime.
Yeah, this is crazy, man.
And do Asian people think like they want to live forever?
Is that more of an American thing?
I think it's an American thing, man.
We accept our fate, you know?
Really?
But that's what I like about you guys.
You think you can change things.
And sometimes you can.
You know, maybe he will live forever.
But I have so many relatives who are, like, old and given how annoying they are,
I don't want them to live forever, man.
Imagine if you're this annoying at 70.
Imagine if you have 700.
Oh.
How annoying would you be?
The worst.
Yeah.
That's part of the reason why I want to do my wedding in Europe,
so hopefully none of them can come.
It's too far.
You have a hit replace.
Oh, dude, definitely, because a lot of the air travel will really wear on some of that metal.
Yeah.
They can't have a walk through the TSA.
They start beeping.
Yeah, they need, yeah, I'm trying to think about Asians.
In a sense, the thing you want to do with your channel,
introducing people to more things.
That's kind of the same with what I want.
to do, you know, especially from my food.
Because food is so tied to culture, right?
So there are a lot of videos where, sure, you know, a lot of them is me roasting celebrity chefs,
but there are also a lot where Uncle Roger travels to a place.
Like my recent one, I went to Thailand, and I got someone who lives there to show me,
Mark Wien is another big food person.
Oh, you ate at 6.30 a.m.
You ate in the morning.
Oh, the best I've tasted.
So good.
And I feel like a lot of the times when Western people go to Asia, they always show the weirdest parts of
of what Asian people eat.
Yeah, like come eat these cat nuts or whatever, huh?
Yeah.
So I feel like me doing this is kind of like,
almost like an insider view of Asia
compared to like a Western perspective of Asia.
And I feel like that's my little contribution to the internet.
Yeah, oh, there you go.
Oh, yeah, that's me.
And that's just a secret curry spice.
I look good.
This is a high effort podcast, man.
You got a Photoshop person on board?
Yeah, we got one guy.
but it's just a secret seasoning you're selling.
That'd be great.
That's a chili sauce.
That's my new chili sauce.
Well, I think Asian food is just expanding in the U.S.
I'm sure that it's just growing.
Look that up.
Is Asian cuisine growing in America?
It must be.
Definitely, definitely.
And there are so many of us globally, you know?
Ev Asian.
Yeah, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, you see one Asian, you've seen them all.
That's the old motto.
Asian cuisine is growing.
is growing in popular in America.
This is reflected in the increase of Asian restaurants.
Well, that's easy to say that.
So it's getting more specific.
Oh, sorry, please read for us.
Go back up.
U.S. visitors to Asia saw a 33% jump
while Oceania and Central America
each saw a 30% increase.
So people just traveling.
Yeah.
Traveling overall is just increasing their palate.
Japan is the gateway drug to Asia.
Really?
Americans love Japan.
When they get there, they love it so much,
then you get the courage to explore other parts of Asia.
Thailand, Cambodia,
see the landmines, you know?
Yeah.
See, the lady boys in Bangkok.
Oh, dude, yeah.
They'll both blow you up.
Yeah.
One's a little nicer, I think.
Yeah, that's true.
Yeah, I think Thailand's been doing the trans thing for a long time.
They've nailed it.
Yeah.
I think.
And that's growing, too.
Men that prefer trans women.
And bring that up.
How much are people enjoying more transsexual?
But the trans people in Thailand are like hot, hot.
You know, they pull it off effort into their process.
Oh, yeah.
They're not just these bootleg trans people.
They have pageants.
They have competitions.
Yeah, here we just have some fucking fit ginger running around with a bra on during the streets of New Orleans during Marty Graw.
And he's yelling that he's into something new or whatever.
It's like, bitch, you're not.
You're just a fucking some St. Patrick's Day bear.
Yeah.
You know?
These are men right here.
Yeah, they're all dudes, man.
Well, what are we?
If you hadn't had told me that, I would be empty in an hour.
I'm just saying, sometimes people to say wiener is just long pussy.
I don't think anybody said that.
I think it's just you, Theo.
A weiner's a long pussy?
I think that's just you, man.
I think it's something you hear if you put your, you know, if you really dig the internet.
Dig deep.
Winner's just that long,
Bersh.
Who won?
The pageant was inaugurated
in 1998.
Okay, let me get a little bit more of this
because this is really fascinating.
Sandra Pimae
Paniakam
collapsed to the floor and shed tears of joy
after she was announced
the winner of the 25th Miss Tiffany
pageant held at the Tiffany show theater
and Pagia on Sunday night.
Saru de Triumph after failing to catch
the judge's eye on four previous appearances
as a Miss Tiffany contestant.
Wow.
Miss Tiffany, a nod to the pageant's original goal of promoting human rights and equality for transgender people in Thailand and around the world.
Are transgender people accepted in Thailand?
Yeah.
They are.
Yeah.
So it's a big part of their culture.
It's a big part of the culture.
They've dealt with this shit.
They're ahead of the time.
You know, I think the arguments people have over here about the trans issue.
I think Thailand probably had that 20 years ago.
But now it's just part of society.
They don't even think about the pronouns.
They just get called like she.
her or whatever they want to get called. So it's nice. I think we can learn from that a little bit.
For sure. I think, yeah, these people are beautiful. Wow, this is a, that's a young lady, huh?
Yeah, they look good, man. Hey, it's like, you don't know what you don't know, you know, don't come on
my back and tell me it's raining, you know? That's that old wives tale. I think you've got to tour
Thailand next. Wow. I don't know. I don't want. You don't know to risk finding out you enjoy this?
I don't know.
You don't want to accidentally bring sand to the freaking Wiener Beach or whatever, you know?
But yeah, oh, no, dude, I think this is great.
But I think the issue that we have in America, and that's just a joke.
But I think the issue that we have in America is that you have men using, mostly for sports, right?
It's like if you're going over to play sports and you know you're a biological male, to me, it just feels like you're cheating, right?
We should have a class that's just for trans people and let them compete there.
Yeah, yeah.
And let it be a new thing that we embody and embrace.
race and that's the thing I would try to start if I'm trans like don't put me in with man or put
me in with women if I'm not exactly as them let me do something new I think that's why they
have the pageants so they keep them busy with the pageants so they don't do sports oh that's a good
oh yeah if you're too busy yeah these these are actual biological women and they don't look near as
good nearly as good as that's a good point huh yeah maybe we're coming to a unique time in culture
where men are tired of being men
so they would rather spend their time
looking like women
and women are tired of being women
and they would rather
spend time looking like men.
Yeah, you can do whatever they want, man.
I think if you become a woman,
that's a benefit too.
You can actually become a Qatari citizen, right?
Oh, that's a good point on.
And marry the Qatari male citizen.
Yeah, there's a loophole.
That's a loophole.
I like this, huh?
That's the dessert on the menu
at Fuyo.
Oh, it's Uncle Roger, yeah.
That is hurt is a secret path
to a Qatari citizenship.
I like that.
I like that.
One last thing I want to talk to you about,
oh, you hear a lot about Taiwan and China, right?
Oh, yeah, that's gone to some trouble there a few years ago.
Just what, talking about it?
Or what do you...
I just had a joke if you search Uncle Roger, V.S., China.
I just did a bit that it works all over the world.
I did that bit in Bangkok and Toronto and L.A.
works all over the world.
So I kind of just wanted to gently roast Taiwan
and gently rose China.
And then right after that,
all my Chinese social media accounts got banned, you know?
Really?
Yeah, there was two years ago.
Everything got wiped.
If you search Uncle Roger
on those Chinese social media apps,
you'll find nothing.
Even though I had like hundreds of thousands of followers before that.
Really?
Yeah.
And did you have, oh yeah, wow, this has 40 million views, Uncle Roger?
Yeah, it's a YouTube short.
Those things go viral sometimes.
Not this viral.
Yeah.
Yeah.
This is the most viral thing since COVID out of China.
China.
China, okay.
China, good country.
Good country.
We have to say that now, correct?
All their phone listening.
Oh, their phone listening.
This nephew got Huawei phone.
They're all listening.
All our phone tap into it.
Long live presidency.
Long live presidency.
Uncle Roger's social credit score going up.
And he's a nephew from Taiwan.
Not a real country.
Not a real...
Oh.
The motherland, one China.
That's hilarious, dude.
So is that a real feeling in Taiwan?
Some of them feel like they should be part of China
and some people don't?
Yes, it's a very divided thing.
But most people don't want to be part of China.
Yeah.
Taiwan is a very interesting place.
They do not use any of the Chinese social media apps.
They use the Western ones.
They use Facebook, Google, Instagram.
Whereas in China, all those things are blocked.
Oh.
You know?
and, you know, I released this clip
and then everything got wiped
from Chinese socials.
And then remember last year,
a few months ago,
everybody was getting on Red Note,
this Chinese app.
I tried re-registering for an account.
And the moment I uploaded my profile photo,
that whole account got wiped again.
No.
So they have some sort of,
I'm in some sort of database over there.
So China's against you, you think?
I probably can still visit if I get a visa,
but I don't know if I want to risk it,
Yeah, and they just probably don't want you having a say in what China is like.
They just don't want you having a voice in their country.
Yeah, yeah.
But, you know, it is what it is.
Sometimes, I think in the U.S., we take free speech for granted sometimes.
I mean, we forget that not all countries are like this.
In the U.S., you say anything, and the worst thing that happens is people get mad at you.
Yeah.
Right?
In the comments, whatever.
I don't know.
I mean, these days, a lot of things get taken down even in the U.S.
I feel like there's things you can't say.
I think things get submerged, you know, or like, what is it called?
Shadowband.
Shadow band.
True, true.
But in a stand-up context, I feel we get more leeway.
Oh, that's a great point.
Yeah.
In a stand-up context, we get so much freedom here.
What is the biggest issue over there with Taiwan?
Do you think that they'll remain free?
Because they make some of the most semiconductors in the world, right?
Yeah, TSMC, that company, yeah.
Taiwan's semiconductor.
TSMC is the only reason China hasn't attacked Taiwan yet, you know?
Wow.
That's too valuable.
China and the United States both view Taiwan's dominance of the global tech supply chain as a national security risk.
In response, they have tried to boost their own capacity to make chips they need.
Yeah, I think they're trying to make more chips in the U.S.
I know that that was something I saw a couple weeks ago.
NVIDIA's chief says U.S. chip controls on China have backfired.
Jensen Huang, who I'd love to talk to, the chipmaker's top executive,
from Nvidia, they're the number one.
They're the leader in chips, I believe,
said the attempt to cut off the flow of advanced AI chips
spurred Chinese companies to accelerate their development.
Wow.
Lawmakers in Washington have worked for years
to limit China's access to the cutting-edge computer chips
needed for advanced artificial intelligence,
particularly those made by Nvidia,
America's leading chip maker.
And yes, so these are the chips that are used for AI.
And for some reason...
AI weapons, you know, rockets.
Right.
And for some reason, they make them the best over here, right?
Taiwan has the best ones.
I think so.
So far, I think.
Yeah.
But according to Nvidia's chief executive, Jensen Huang, those regulations driven by
economic security concerns have only made Chinese tech companies stronger.
Wow.
Yeah.
I mean, this is the type of thing somebody would go to war because whoever controls this
is going to control a lot of things.
I think this is going over my head, man.
I just buy some Bitcoin and call it a day, you know.
Yeah.
Oh, me too.
I'm just wondering
what could happen
to the people of Taiwan, right?
I think that's my like question
is like, do people there live every day?
It must be weird there every day.
You're going to a factory probably
and creating these chips
but knowing that the creation of these chips
could have a semblance on
if your country gets
attacked or attempted to be controlled.
It has to be very strange, I feel like, you know?
Do you think that makes any sense or no?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
They have this, maybe this added responsibility
that I better make a good fucking chip.
otherwise China's going to ruin us.
Right.
Or by keeping them make these,
what if we all decided we're not going to make them?
Would they all just leave us alone
and we could just be at peace?
No, if Taiwan stops making them,
China's going to attack it.
China needs those chips right now.
That's why they're not bombing the factories.
Oh, I see.
So they need them because they're supplying them.
Yes, yes.
So if you stop making it,
that'll be like a, you know,
if a what they call it, a bin man,
a garbage truck person,
you know, if they suck at their job,
the whole country gets attacked.
Oh, yeah.
That would be stressful.
Oh, it'd be the worst.
Imagine you're working in and out.
If you got the order wrong, Mexico's coming.
Do this made one of my last questions.
Do you think, so a lot of goods from America are made in Asia.
Yeah.
Right?
Yeah.
Do you think that, how do Asian people feel about that?
Like, do they take a lot of pride that they make it, all these, like, things that go all over the world?
Do they just feel like it's just a means to an end?
and there's not a lot of pride in it.
Like, what does that feel like?
Do you feel like, especially probably to China,
China's the place that gets labeled a lot
as like making everything, you know?
Yeah.
What have you heard or like, what do people say about that?
Does that make sense to you?
Yeah, Malaysia makes quite a few things too,
not as much as China for sure.
I feel like to us, it's a job.
And it's a decent job.
And without those manufacturing jobs,
those people will have a shittier life.
Oh.
You know?
So I think we like that those things,
you know, globalization, I think when people talk about globalization to see it from the American
perspective, yeah, you are, you are losing jobs to the outside world. But on the flip side,
we, we Asians are gaining some jobs that pay better than those jobs that existed prior,
like, you know, working at a hawker stall selling noodles all day. Manufacturing shoes probably
pays them more. And I think this is a tough part, right? Sometimes the, sometimes the economy, I feel
is a zero-sum game, right? Making the shoe, it's either a job in America or a job in
Asia. We only need so many shoes, right? So, but we do think it is good. It helps us elevate our
quality of life and hopefully in a few generations time, the Asians will have made more money,
and then maybe we won't have to do those menial manufacturing jobs anymore. But for now,
you know, it's the same thing where there was a news article, I think it came out recently,
last year maybe, where in New York they were starting to use, you know, like self-checkout
lines, but then you had a FaceTime video calling someone from the Philippines, the persons being
the checkout, the cashier for you from the Philippines. Oh, so you had like a, you had a Zoom
call with a checkout person? Yeah, yeah. So the whole internet hated it. But then from my perspective,
it's like the person in the Philippines is probably getting paid way more than any job that she
would have gotten the person that they would have gotten in the Philippines. And this is just a hard
part of, it's not an easy problem to solve, right? Global inequality.
And I think it just takes time maybe and just the hope is one day globalization or just even the playing field.
Everybody can afford the things we need in life.
Healthcare, a house, vehicle, those things.
So that's my take on it.
It's not very funny, but hopefully, yeah, that's the thing.
Oh, Philippine, yeah.
Yeah.
But no, I think that's great.
I just always wonder.
Like, I always think, like, oh, yeah, it's just like how I look at it from my perspective as an American.
I never think, like, what do these people feel about it?
Like, you know, do that?
We probably like it to the Filipino person.
Oh, for sure.
She's just working from home, putting a fake Zoom background.
Nothing, huh?
Just clocking in.
Cooking.
Yeah, not even cooking.
She's just checking out the cashier.
Yeah, but she could be cooking at the same time.
Yeah, she could be cooking for her kids.
She'll be home for her kids.
Because in Asia, people work long hours, man.
There are some, you know, in Malaysia we have domestic helpers sometimes who are coming
from Indonesia and they live with us.
Right.
So they are just gone from their families three years at a time.
and they get one day off a week maybe
where they get to call their families.
So this Filipino job, this virtual cashier job,
that's like the best job.
That's working remotely, man.
That's being a digital nomad for them.
Yeah, I like that.
They're doing that in Bali, you know.
I like that tree.
I like that shit.
Yeah.
But what about this?
So, and I'll say this,
right of applause for Filipinos, I want to say that, right?
Yes.
Joe Koi.
Doing good job.
Yeah.
Doing good job.
Yeah.
But I want to say,
Filipinos, it's funny because
they're usually the last people you see before you die
because a lot of them work in hospice care.
Oh, that's true.
You know?
I was wondering where this conversation was going.
Oh, yeah, it's going on.
But you just see the light and then there's a Filipino person.
It's just like, well, the light is a little bit...
Blocking the light.
It's a little bit blocked, yeah, by like one Filipino person
with like a stethoscope, you know?
Yeah, it's Joe Koi blocking the light.
But they often have a lot of the same name, you know,
Deby, Deb, Deb, that...
David.
David.
David.
Yeah.
Yeah.
What's another one?
Maria.
Susie.
Suzy.
Popular.
Look at a popular Filipino-American names.
Then we'll get you out of here.
Yeah.
Maria, Christina.
Filipino.
God, I want to be, when it happens again.
I think they have the biggest eyes for Asians.
Because they're roundest eyes.
Full of love.
Yeah, full of love and care.
Oh.
When you're in hospice,
You don't want, you want someone with like big round eyes taking care of you, you know?
Big round eyes.
You ever heard that song?
No.
Oh, I know that song.
Big round eyes.
Oh, yeah.
It's about Filipino love.
It's about Pinoy heartbreak.
I think in hospice care, you don't want a squeat-eyed person taking care of you.
They look like they're up to something.
Oh, yeah.
They're a secret, huh?
Yeah.
James, that could be one.
Edward.
Edward.
Yeah, yeah.
Filipino.
Yeah, I love it.
Benjamin.
Benjamin. Yeah, Benjamin. A lot of good Filipinos. God.
Mario's good.
Oh, like Italian Filipino.
Yeah.
Like, oh, Pinoy pasta.
It's a Ravioli.
Yeah, I would love to be Filipino next time, man.
Yeah, that's reincarnate, man.
Dude, we can come back, huh?
Yeah, I better come back rich, dude.
I want to come back to a kid with rich parents.
Oh, you want to be a kid of rich parents?
Oh, it would be fun.
Yeah, it doesn't matter what race.
Doesn't matter what race.
This kid with rich parents.
But would you attack them?
Would you like Menendez him or whatever?
Menendez brothers, the guys that, I think they attack their parents or something
because they brought them cold food or whatever?
I haven't looked at it.
I probably would just to get their inheritance, you know?
I'll make sure they write their wheel down first.
Yeah.
Just double-check the wheel.
All right, step, step, step.
Okay, it sounds dangerous.
It sounds dangerous for us.
Nigel-un.
Thank you so much for coming in.
We really appreciate your time.
to some good food sometimes.
Yeah, I would love to do that.
And make a video or something.
I'd love to, dude.
Yeah.
I'd love to swap a number or something.
And this has been one of my favorite interviews, man.
Thank you so much.
Like, sometimes I go into like a day or something.
I'm sure this happens to everybody.
But it's like, how's this day going to be?
And you're like kind of tired.
You're just been a long, whatever.
And then it's awesome, you know?
Thank you.
Likewise.
Likewise.
So I think that's the power of like people getting together, right?
Because sometimes you need somebody else to make your day better, you know?
And so I just want to say thank you so much for your time.
time. And yeah, I hope you do get that extra restaurant opened up, dude. I think it would be
exciting for people to go see and for more people to learn about foods from different parts
of the world. You can check out Uncle Roger's channel. He's got a great channel. It's
Nigel, Nijl-ung. Yeah. Nigel-un. And we'll put all the links and everything, man.
Anything else that you wanted to share? No, that's it. Check up my channel. Yeah.
Oh, and best of luck with the marriage, dude. Let's say one nice thing.
Say one or two or three or three nice things about your wife so that one day she can look back and have this.
She'll look back to the Theovan podcast.
That's true.
That's a horrible thought to say.
Is that egotistical to say that?
No, no, it's okay.
I think she'll be happy.
That's all I'm saying.
Yeah.
She'll love it.
Okay.
What's something nice about her that you really admire?
I think she's a love of my life and she makes every day better.
Oh, dude.
That's gay, bro.
Play the song again, dude.
That's the gayest shit I've ever heard.
bro, God, dude.
I regret saying that now.
I regret.
I'm joking, dude.
Shut it down.
No.
Okay, you think you found the love of your life?
Yeah, I think so.
Yeah.
That's cool.
That's why people get married, right?
Yeah.
That's a good point, huh?
If you haven't found the love of your life,
then what are you just part-time
and it was somebody on your heart?
Yeah, situation shit.
Just the fuck buddy of your life.
Yeah.
That's a long haul, man.
Well, congratulations.
Two months to your marriage?
Yep.
Oh, it's exciting, dude.
Very few relatives are coming.
It's too far.
Not allowed.
Too far for these old Asians.
Shut them down.
Shut them down, dude.
Deport them from Europe.
Pull the semiconductors right out of their backs, dude.
We do not need them hitting the air.
Go back to the factory.
To that factory in the sky, dude.
Thank you so much.
I'll have a good day, brother.
You too.
