This Past Weekend - #593 - Kevin Gates

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Starting point is 00:00:19 19 plus and physically located in Ontario. Gambling problem? Call 1-866-531-2600 or visit connexontario.ca. Please play responsibly. We're getting into the final shows for the Return of the Rat Tour. Gosh, this rat is almost fully returned. July 9th will be in Philadelphia, Rochester, New York on July 10th. Then we're in Detroit after that. Moving on, we're in Los Angeles, Anaheim, at the Honda Center and Oceanside, California.

Starting point is 00:00:54 You can get all your tickets at theovon.com slash T-O-U-R. And just thank you so much for your support. Today's guest is a musician out of Baton Rouge, Louisiana. Baby out the boot. He crosses many genres like rap, R&B, soul. He does it all. This dog, he a 101. He a 101.

Starting point is 00:01:18 He's got a new album on the way, Luca Brasi 4. And he's heading out on a huge tour this October. I'm grateful to sit down with my Louisiana amigo Mr. Kevin Gates. I'm off the stuff. I'm off the stuff. I'm off the stuff. It has tough, man. Yeah, I got this from, I collect these kind of heads. I bought two of them this time because I put dents in them. Really? Every time I travel.

Starting point is 00:02:03 What, just traveling, setting it somewhere? Yeah, and they get smushed every time. Yeah. Yeah, a hat is kind of hard to take care of. That's the only thing I don't love about a hat. Like if I'm on a plane, I'll put it, and then I'll take a nap, it'll fall off the seat or something.

Starting point is 00:02:15 Every time. Yeah, you look sharp, man. Thank you. Recently, I started feeling in my own life, man, I wish that I dressed up a little bit more. I just wish that. It's like how you do anything is how you do everything. So I'm like, I prepare to, for something great to happen.

Starting point is 00:02:34 Every time I leave the house, I prepare for something great to happen. Like even when I go to the gym, I prepare for something great to happen. Yeah, that's an energy. I think I just started thinking that like Like, yeah, I want to just, because then I want to be excited about how I even look. You know?

Starting point is 00:02:50 Like, I never. I mean, I only got, well, I got multiple suits, but I only got like four color that I wear. I got a gray suit. I got like three or four of them. I got like three or four black suits. Got like three or four black suits. Got like three or four navy suits.

Starting point is 00:03:08 And I got like three or four, they like different shades, so I say like a tan and a darker tan. You like them? Yeah, I just love suits. I love them, they look fly. You've always been pretty stylish, actually. I remember, you and I went to a Super Bowl together. I don't know if you remember it or not. Yeah, that's when I had the turtleneck on with the slacks

Starting point is 00:03:27 Yeah, that's when I realized I was like, oh Kevin's doing something different cuz you hear rumors about Kevin You hear people like Kevin, you know Kevin like big foot. Yeah, he's staring at the moon Kevin out there He you know, he he hiding in the tree branches and stuff. You hear a lot of rumors like that, you know I shoot my bow and arrow. Yeah. He's out there, he babysitting bats or something. Oh excuse me, shout out to Mike at Cabela's. He's your guy? Yeah, he the one who, he dialed my bow and arrow in for me.

Starting point is 00:03:56 Like dialed it in, like set the sights on it for me. I haven't used one. But yeah, you hear everything about that. Kevin Gates, he's out there, he breastfeeding pelicans and stuff like that. You hear a lot of the mystery, right? The lore and I love the lore because it makes things really it's like Advertising without you really doing anything in a way except being yourself But I remember we were on a like a limo bus. They were taking us to the soup bowl

Starting point is 00:04:21 Everybody's on their phones or something like that Kevin just sitting there, look you look like the happiest guy in the thing. It's this thing I do called breath work. And I think I said it one time in another interview, but I'm super into Navy SEALs and shit. I like watch. Don't think I'm weird, but I am.

Starting point is 00:04:45 Oh yeah. I just sit there and watch like videos or like the training that they do and I watch people take the Navy SEAL test and fail and then try to come back and do it and I just watch that shit and I'll be watching like David Goggins and shit like that.

Starting point is 00:04:59 And it's like, you know, the first thing they teach them how to do is breathe. So that's why I be doing the box breathing. And it really help with anxiety. Explain it to me. You inhale for four seconds. It's like you pretend like you looking at a box. You inhale for four seconds.

Starting point is 00:05:17 You hold it. You exhale for four seconds. And then you hold it. And it keep you super calm. And does it get a little scary at certain points or hard to remember? I guess you just get used to the pattern. If you ever get off, you just reconnect to your breath.

Starting point is 00:05:33 Because you're going to talk, you're going to interrupt yourself, but then you reconnect to your breath and it keep you calm, like no anxiety. Yeah. Oh yeah, I get rattled pretty easy. And I'm an over thinker, like, especially get I get rattled pretty easy and I'm an over thinker like Especially if I'm about to go somewhere like I put Unrealistic expectations on myself about the outcome

Starting point is 00:05:54 Yeah, and we say that we and I might say that I'm going in there with a positive attitude, but I Want to know everything I want to know how it's gonna go I want to be able to like make sure I'm okay. No matter what's going on I knew this shit was gonna be cool cuz I was already wrong you at the Super Bowl. I like man I do crazy. Oh I don't think anybody could out crazy You lost everybody man, it's gonna be a little hot Do we have any ice we don't have any I don't need no ice I'm good, okay I'd like I was kind of nervous to talk to you cuz I've known of you know

Starting point is 00:06:31 I'm from Louisiana so I known about you like we see our bread even growing up I remember the first time I ever heard about you some of this girl I was talking to from Boga Lusa was like have you heard of Kevin Gates and I thought it was a subdivision and It is it is really Kevin gates damn I said, I don't know. I don't know You know, I got a friend that lives in Meadowbrook or whatever, but I've never been over there and she's like no you have to Hear some of what this guy's doing and it was intense it remind the first time I listen to your music It reminded me the first time I saw UFC

Starting point is 00:07:05 I was like some of this stuff is a little too hard for me, you know Look cuz it's you your stuff is very it's not all of it. But some of us a great it's graphic It is real. It's very rarely is really raw. That's my perception of it But so that's how I got it introduced to you. Obviously was just from being in Louisiana Do you miss those days in Louisiana coming up? What was that like for you just kind of coming up when you look back on it now? I'm grateful for Louisiana

Starting point is 00:07:31 because it made me everything that I am right now. And the things that we cherish, other people don't really cherish when you go other places. And then with us having that Southern hospitality, like, yes, sir, no, sir, don't call me that, you make me feel old when you go other places, but we used to catch whoopings for not saying yes sir, no sir, yes ma'am, no ma'am.

Starting point is 00:07:52 You know, I done been beat with extension cords and whatever they could find. Go get a branch off the tree. Go get something, oh dude, my mother would beat me with my younger siblings, she would, I'm like, god damn, both of us getting it. Grab them by the ankle. Yeah, like damn what? Um, what were, what was some of like, did you ever, did you get to work with other artists? I know people ask you that kind of stuff all the time, but growing up, like when

Starting point is 00:08:16 I was coming up, they had like, uh, Mr. P, uh, Master P, Mystical. Um, Master P did a song together and I done done, I. I didn't work with Wayne. We talked about only Louisiana. Yeah, I'm just talking about kind of that, that time in the 90s. I don't work with master P. If you want to go currently, I don't work with Fredo bang NBA, young boy, tech. Oh yeah. I heard that song. You got what young boy. I just heard it the other day. I don't know who you say I am.

Starting point is 00:08:49 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, they had, I'm trying to think, oh Partners in Crime, remember them? Yeah. It's that new Mr. Mina, with that pop-up, there you go. Dude, they had Partners in Crime, UNLV, oh is that UNLV? Pump the pump the party. UNLV.

Starting point is 00:09:03 They had, I'm trying to think of who else we love. Oh, Mystical was the best. Mystical was great, bro. I liked that bitch. I'm on that Boo Cal click. Danger! Yeah, I liked that. The keep bumping me. He kind of had his own thing and he had those horns in it. Yeah, if we going that way, I like Fiend, Mr. Magic.

Starting point is 00:09:19 I liked all, I liked everything that was coming out. Oh. You gotta say so to Slim. Oh yeah. You gotta say Soldier Slim. Oh yeah. You gotta say Soldier Slim. I didn't, I don't, somebody didn't put me on to a lot of Soldier Slim. You gotta say Stone and Leck, you gotta say the D-Boys,

Starting point is 00:09:33 you gotta say all of them. I think some of that I didn't get put on then. But I loved it, that was a special time, I felt like, in Louisiana, because every, there were so many eyes were focused on it, they had like just so much sound coming out of there. Still do. Yeah. Like the sound different.

Starting point is 00:09:50 Oh yeah, well things have changed so much, but at that time I just felt like, I don't know, there was something really spectacular about it at that time. We still got our own signature sound. Louisiana like, that's where the flavor at. Oh yeah. You get a container of juice and you sit it on a table.

Starting point is 00:10:08 The flavor falls to the bottom. You have to shake it up for the flavor to go to the top. The flavor always stay on the bottom. The bottom of the map. That's it. The bottom of the map, man. The bottom of the boot. Yeah, dude, I loved that time.

Starting point is 00:10:23 That was a special time growing up, man. What was the styles that y'all had? An art tan, because in Covington we had like, Jabeau jeans, polo with the big horse. Remember people wear that sometimes? He'll figure. I went polo crazy. I went polo crazy. I could see that. I went polo crazy. I could see that. Dead caps, collars, Jabeaus. I did Air Force 1s, but my thing was Adidas Stan Smith. Oh yeah. I did the Adidas Stan Smith. I almost wore those today. All day I dream about stacks.

Starting point is 00:10:52 Yeah. Dude, that was a great time, bro. I mean, all times are great, but that was a special time. It's just something you and I can, you know, we both have a little bit of similarity of that. Yeah, I was born in 86, so. Yeah, you're younger than me. Well, did you ever get to see Mystical around the way or no?

Starting point is 00:11:07 Uh-uh, I seen him a few times when he was out of prison, but I haven't seen him since then. Yeah. Yeah, I'm trying to think of, I remember we'd go to the rec center over at Baton Rouge. By LSU? Yep, and Master P and his, they would be in their playing ball with like silk.

Starting point is 00:11:24 I don't know if C Murder might have been in and out of there, but they definitely had Silk was in there. Silk stay out here now. Does he? Yeah, I be seeing him at 24 hours 50's. Let's go. Every now and then when I used to go to him. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:11:37 Just seeing him in that hoop and still hoop. Yeah, that was a special time though, man. That was a big like explosion for, I felt like for Louisiana rap. When you think of, I know there was a lot of hustling and stuff when you grew up. What was it like, the hustle? When people say I had to hustle a lot when I was young,

Starting point is 00:11:56 what does that mean exactly? Hustle? Yeah, I know what it means. You have to grind, you gotta stay busy, you gotta figure things out. You gotta be locked in and you gotta be focused. Whatever your hustle is, you gotta give it 110%. Because being from Louisiana ain't really nothing to do

Starting point is 00:12:10 but die or go to jail. So whatever it is that you focus on, you gotta be locked in. Like Juva and I say, we snatched all the hoes and bows and retennis, we didn't give a fuck, and we bowed for three minutes. I might have said it backwards. That's all right.

Starting point is 00:12:28 We can edit it into the correct format. What was some of your hustles as a youngster? What kind of hustle did you have to do personally? I started off washing cars. Yeah. What, just like in the yard, you'd put a passan or you'd get like a? I started off working at a, they got a car wash on Corsica and that was my first job washing cars. With it like they had an inside and outside? Yeah inside and outside. I started on a vacuum

Starting point is 00:12:56 and then I started being like once it come through the washer you dry it off and that's how I learned how to get the fender wells and the door jams last. Oh, yeah, why? Because that's where all the dirt at. So if you drying the car, you gotta dry the body of the car first, then you go back and get the door jams and the fender wells last.

Starting point is 00:13:16 That's where all the dirt at. Because otherwise you're gonna get the rag dirty and put it everywhere else. You're gonna put dirt on it, yeah. Yeah. And then even when you wipe the rims, you hold the tile and wipe the rims. You spray the tile off, but you hold the tile

Starting point is 00:13:31 and wipe the rims on the inside, clean them real good. Yeah. And the best thing to clean windows, I mean, to wipe windows with is newspaper. Oh yeah. No streaks. Yeah, why was that, I wonder? I don't know, I know it don't leave no streaks,

Starting point is 00:13:43 make it look good. Yeah, that was nice. Dude, yeah, when I, I know it don't leave no streets, make it look good. Yeah, that was nice. Dude, yeah, when I was growing up, washing your car was one of the best things you could do. Of course. Because you leave that, that thing felt beautiful, boy. That was your office. Yeah. That was your escape.

Starting point is 00:14:00 Ain't nothing like a little late night ride. Yeah. Waffle house. Yeah. Dude, I remember exactly, if I lit a cigarette at this one point, Ain't nothing like a little late night ride. Waffle house. Dude, I remember exactly, if I lit a cigarette at this one point right when I take off out of work, it would get me all the way home. I'd pull up right into the driveway when that cigarette was done.

Starting point is 00:14:15 It was like this perfect kind of seance that I had in my life. I loved that. That was your first car? My first car was an 84 Ford Escort. That bitch was chill, but somebody- My first call was a Nissan Sentra. Yeah, really?

Starting point is 00:14:28 What year was it? I don't know, the old one. The old, old one. Pull one up. Just pull up a- Pull up a- The tan one. Pull up a-

Starting point is 00:14:40 Pull up a 1990. Let's see what they got. Let's see if we close on it. That Nissan. Nah, I was a little newer than that. Nuh-uh, yeah, that's a little too old. Pull up a 1990. Let's see what they got. Let's see if we close on it That nice house a little more than that. No. Yeah, that's a little too old pull up a 2001 That's it right there. Oh, yeah that bitch tasted white. Yeah and So so your first hustle was car washing and did you get into stuff in the streets? Did you get into stuff that was kind of illegal type of stuff or no?

Starting point is 00:15:06 Yeah, a little bit. Yeah. Not nothing major, but a little bit. I did a little something. Yeah. Does it feel like if you grow up in certain areas that you have to do that? You gonna want to.

Starting point is 00:15:18 Them the only people getting money. Right. That's what a girl's like. Yeah. Oh yeah, the girl's like somebody got a little bit of cash. Like I remember telling Gilly and Wild Low, I was like, man, when I was young, I remember all I wanted was a car,

Starting point is 00:15:35 some money, a girlfriend, and a gun. Cause that's all you see. Oh yeah. Yeah, I got to pull out a bank roll. That was just, you know. Just to show it off. Then they start calling it rex. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:15:50 Yeah, rex. They went from stacks to rex. Yeah, I think the name, do you think like, like over the years you hear like things have changed, like the hood, the block, the trenches, the mud, like there's always kind of this evolution of the name, the block, the trenches, the mud. There's always kind of this evolution of the name, I feel like.

Starting point is 00:16:08 I mean, we always, I call it the section. They from the section, they from our section. Are they from out the section? Yeah. Like if somebody, if you from my section, or you from my area where I'm at, at the time that I'm, oh yeah, he's from out the section.

Starting point is 00:16:26 Right. Or I'm gonna ask him, or say I'm just coming home from jail and I see new faces, like who are they? They from out the section? Yeah, that's such and such people, that's such and such people. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. Do you feel like, do you have to live in fear?

Starting point is 00:16:39 Like in the section, do you feel like in a black area, do you have to live in fear? Did it feel like in a black area, do you have to live in fear, did it feel like? No, because it's, anything that you do every day is gonna feel regular to you. You know, anything that is new to you, say if it's new, if it's new, you're gonna be a little apprehensive. You know what I'm saying? So you're gonna have to sit back, scope it out,

Starting point is 00:17:00 and then you fall in, you in the mix now. But if you grew up in them type of environments, it ain't gonna feel like somewhat dangerous, it's gonna feel like home. Oh yeah. So whatever, go on, it just went on. Right, you don't know any different. But from the outside looking in, it's like,

Starting point is 00:17:16 oh God, it's so horrible there, da da da da da. But when you in it, it's like, man, that's my people, this my auntie, this my cousin, this, you know. This is the culture. Yeah, it's like, man, that's my people, that's my auntie, that's my cousin, it's, you know. This is the culture. Yeah, it's like. Right, a fist don't know it's in water, really. It's family, you know what I'm saying? Do you think, because you always hear over the years,

Starting point is 00:17:34 you hear like, we gotta change these areas, right? You hear like, you have people, we gotta make things safer, we gotta change these areas. Do you think that the people actually in those communities, do you think they really want those communities to change or that is... If given the opportunity... Does the question make any sense to you or no? It make a lot. If given the opportunity anybody would do better. Right. People do... A man, yeah this is a wise quote, a man is what he know, not what he's told.

Starting point is 00:18:06 And I'll say it in like a vernacular. A man is what he knows and not what he's told. You are what you know, not what you told. You are what you do, not what you say you'll do. So I could sit around and somebody could tell me, man, you know what, you should change and you should do this and there's so many other opportunities.

Starting point is 00:18:23 But if I've never been exposed to these opportunities all I know is what I know right and that's like that's what recidivism that's people that repeat offenders habitual offenders because it's recidivism because they don't know anything but what they know and I was like that I was locked in focused on one thing till I started experiencing other things. I broadened my horizon, I opened my mind. Yeah. Oh, I've watched a lot of interviews with you, man,

Starting point is 00:18:51 and a lot of it's been really fascinating, man. I feel really thankful that you're here today to spend time. I just took a, uh. What, an ambient? I just read about Laguna Beach, like, this was in 2000 or 11, because I read a lot of like vampire novels and all of that.

Starting point is 00:19:13 Oh damn bro. Yeah, like I read a lot. I'm a record of reader. So this was like way in 2010 or 11 that I read a book. When I was reading the book, that was how I'm going to Laguna Beach. Last weekend, I just took my son to Laguna Beach for his birthday, so it was like a, kind of like a bucket list.

Starting point is 00:19:33 Not a bucket list, but I was like, it'll be cool to go there. Like, even like with Palm Springs, I read about Palm Springs before, and I just passed through Palm Springs. And they had vampires that were there? And Rachelle Meade got this vampire academy, and one of the schools that they went to was in Palm Springs. And they had vampires that were there? And Rachelle Meade got this vampire academy, and one of the schools that they went to

Starting point is 00:19:48 was in Palm Springs. Yeah, boy. They sent part of the older gay vampires, probably, over there. I don't know, but it was so crazy that you say that. It's because when you're given the opportunity to do better, you will. If you're never given that opportunity, you're not going to do better.

Starting point is 00:20:04 We could say, yeah, you just got to overcome and stay focused and lock in. I think me, the beautiful thing about Kevin Gates is I have a very adventurous spirit and I'm going to try something. I love to try new things because it's how you create new neuro paths. Even if you did it and you didn't like it you still had the experience yeah so you created like new neuro paths because if you do the same thing every day you become stagnant in the mind you just yeah you know a robot you become a cul-de-sac to your own cul-de-sac yeah like that's like that's my biggest fear is being complacent I don't ever want to get

Starting point is 00:20:41 stuck hmm so I did that I went to the beach and it was like, and I unlocked a few things for me, it was like, we just took a road trip, it wasn't nothing but like two hours, but. We did it. We did it. Yeah, we did something different. We did something different. Yeah, cause I wonder sometimes, like,

Starting point is 00:20:56 cause you always like, you know, like a lot of neighborhoods, especially if it's like impoverished neighborhoods, you know, they say that type of thing. Predominantly black. And predominantly black neighborhoods. It's like, it's also those neighborhoods that give a lot of the culture its flavor and give it its story, right?

Starting point is 00:21:13 Or some of its story, right? People say like, I came out of this, I came through this, right? So sometimes I just wonder like. It's a blessed, it's the people that are blessed. I say that because you're looking at people that grew up in hardship and the roughest conditions ever, but we made the best of what we had.

Starting point is 00:21:32 And we didn't even know we was poor until we saw rich people. It's like when you go to other countries, third world countries, they don't even know they poor until they see people with more than what they have. Like I was telling somebody at one time, we just wanted a car. And then once we saw the Bentley, we wanted the Bentley.

Starting point is 00:21:48 And then we wanted this and we wanted that because we saw it. But to answer your question about the people that come through that, I believe it's a rite of passage. It's like the movie Leonidas, when the boy went off into the wilderness and he came back a man.

Starting point is 00:22:09 We don't have no father figures or none of that in the house. We come from mostly single mother, your mom made work, your grandmother raised you, things of that nature. And we had to go out there and just find our way. So it was like a rite of passage. And the beautiful thing about me is I had beautiful people in my life that kind of helped guide me and lead me and steer me in the right direction. Yeah. I made mistakes. I bumped my head and I appreciate every one of them because they made

Starting point is 00:22:36 me this. But to answer that question, I look at it more like a rite of passage. I look at it more like a rite of passage. This is an ad by BetterHelp. You know, men today face immense pressures to keep it all together, to provide, to just frickin' be a lieutenant in your own little world. It's a lot. It's responsibility. If you're a father, especially, it adds more to it.

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Starting point is 00:25:32 But a lot of time when we'd be having like, our body just really needs salt. Yeah. We'd be dehydrated. You know, I noticed that happens more often. I feel like, and when I was a kid, you didn't hear anybody talk about dehydration. And now I feel like people talk about it every day cuz we ate salt

Starting point is 00:25:47 We cooked with seasoning Louisiana season. It's a good point people don't hear people down there talking about you dehydrated Eat a pickle Country boy can't survive. Yeah, bro. That was it country boy can survive. That's a good point Everybody had gout to everybody had sugar pressure gout Salt pressure everything country boy can survive everything that was it You were practicing Muslim Nice nice to see you today I like you talking about what I got on no, I think you know this ain't got you. No, it doesn't look like that

Starting point is 00:26:45 No You talking about what I got on? No, please forgive me. No, I didn't know what it UV because you thought it, cause I thought the bow tie. I mean the irony is ironic that I got the bow tie on. I'm not that kind, but Dave Shapiro said, I'm not good at it, but you know, I do the best I can, you know? No, I didn't know, I thought, no, I feel like, no, yeah, I didn't know what I thought,

Starting point is 00:27:14 I just felt like, dang, Kevin, yeah, I thought you just seemed like a, uh. It's okay. Okay. It's okay. Dang, that's hilarious. It was just funny, cause I had to, that's one thing I, like,

Starting point is 00:27:27 like, I possessed the ability to laugh at myself. And once I developed the ability to laugh at myself, life became so much more easier. Let's talk about that. If I slip and fall, like, every time we step outside, we're being judged. You know, if you went to school and you had to, oh God, I gotta say it.

Starting point is 00:27:49 I gotta, not to get off subject, I used to hate free dress day at school. Uniform saved my life. Really? Yeah. But, yeah. Why, you couldn't handle it? I ain't had no clothes.

Starting point is 00:28:01 Oh damn. Yeah, you just wore a uniform again like Kevin. For a free dress day I wore my mama, I wore a pair of my mama jeans to middle school in an old type of ear figure shirt in the same shoes I had been wearing to school the old time. Man, they teased me forever. Then, you know how you got the faded part on the knees?

Starting point is 00:28:22 Yeah. It was like, why your knees white? What you been on your knees? Nah, that's the style. Everybody got distressed dental now. So that was hard, that was the worst. But I said that to say this, if you possess the ability to laugh at yourself,

Starting point is 00:28:36 you never have to worry about being shamed of anything. I've heard you talk about that before. In fact, man, it's funny, because one of the things that- It's okay okay to be human you know what I'm saying well you know it was most of my life it was hard for me to laugh at myself a couple years ago it's so funny a couple years ago there was a moment that happened I don't remember what it was but I like I went Theo I just kind of laughed at myself and said my name my My whole life, it had been this internal thing

Starting point is 00:29:07 that had been just judging me always. And for the first time ever. We are our worst critics. But I just didn't realize how infected I'd been by my own, by judgment of myself. But we're taught that because when we come outside, we judged by our peers, we judged by everything. If you do this, if you do that.

Starting point is 00:29:25 And then it's like, you know what? I'm gonna be the best human I could be. I don't care if I make mistakes, I'm gonna follow my heart. I don't care what nobody think. I swear to God, I'm gonna be the best human I could be. And something else I used to do, before I developed the greater sense of self-worth, I would overcompensate. And that's still a form of seeking validation.

Starting point is 00:29:52 Like I would overextend and I would overextend myself as far as just the person I am, not to be liked. I was doing this because this is what I really wanted somebody to do for me. Yeah. So I will overextend and just overshare and over love and over everything. I would do it to the moat, but this is the love that I should have been giving myself. Bro, there'll be times I'll text this over the past two years. I noticed this happened for me. I'll text somebody. Hey man, just wanted to remind you, you're a great guy and I'm so proud of you. I wish somebody would tell me that. And as I'm typing it to them, tears will come out of my face and I didn't realize and it's a nice thing to say to them and a lot of times it's a person I'll have enough of a connection with where like we share a lot of similar experiences so we can, you know, we'll say that type of thing to each other. But man, sometimes as I'm sending that, because really I just like, that's what I always needed, right? The dude who did my guns on my hands, my gun tattoos, his

Starting point is 00:30:54 name, Trevin Spielman, but some people call him Trevon or Trevon. I call him just T, or my brother. But what is he doing? He's out of Louisiana or where? I'm out of T. He used to always make jokes. He used to always laugh. He used to always check on everybody else. And he sent me a text message. I got on the flight and went to California. When my flight landed, the last text message was he was like,

Starting point is 00:31:20 I don't think I could do this anymore. Then I found out he killed himself. So it's like oftentimes the people that's always helping everybody else, it make you want to start checking on them. That's why when I did it, and not to bring up nothing with Drusky, but shout out to Drusky.

Starting point is 00:31:39 I did a little show where I was on there like a blind date and he was like, man, you too uptight. And I'm like, I'm not. I just, most of the time, the people that make all the jokes, I check on their well-being, because that's how my brother was. He used to always make jokes and make me laugh, and he'd be doing my tattoos,

Starting point is 00:31:57 and I'd be telling him about everything I've been through. Like, he was like my therapist. And he even flew out to California one time just to tattoo me. Can't stay at my apartment and everything. And you never know what people going through internally. And that's the reason I don't just take people for granted. Like especially people that's always making everybody else laugh.

Starting point is 00:32:18 So I'll laugh with you, but I'm also want to be here with you to see what's going on. Yeah, so I'ma laugh with you, but when we finish, I'ma ask you, you sure everything okay? Because if you need to talk, I'm here. And that's just the type of person I am, because he was one of them people. He was super funny, everything.

Starting point is 00:32:36 I never would have thought he would have took his own life. And that's what he just was dealing with, too much pain? Yeah, he was dealing with a lot. He was dealing with a lot. That's my brother, I love him. Amen. Trevon Spillman. His name Trevon Spillman.

Starting point is 00:32:53 Trevon Spillman. But some people call him Trevor. Yeah. And he from Louisiana too. Trevon Spillman. Well good, I'm glad we say his name today, man. Yeah, it just made me think about that. The people that give the most, we never ask them do they need anything. Yeah, it just made me think about that. Like the people that give the most,

Starting point is 00:33:05 we never ask them, do they need anything? Yeah. Yeah, man, it's, you know, it's, man, a lot of my life, especially like as an adult in the past 10 years, eight years really has been having a journey with myself, right? I didn't even know who I was. I don't even know if honestly, brah,

Starting point is 00:33:23 I feel, it's not as like I've only been alive for about five or six years in some way. Before that. You too? Yeah, you too. Before that, I was alive, but I was just, and I don't even know what was controlling me. I'm grateful that God was giving me guidance. You was alive, but you wasn't living.

Starting point is 00:33:37 Man, I was, well, I just didn't even know who, only the only way I was experiencing the world was how you needed me to experience it, you know, kind of type of thing But I wanted to say one more time just that like yeah, there was a moment where I laughed at myself. Oh Hey, I ain't mean to cut you off. Please forgive me. No, you didn't got lost. No, it's important. This is good at the end You've you're totally forgiven and yeah, I'm sorry for cutting you off, too But uh totally forgiven and yeah, I'm sorry for cutting you off too. But yeah, just to be able to laugh at myself, bro.

Starting point is 00:34:08 And then part of me, I felt, man, my whole life, here I am. And I won't even give my own self a laugh. It's like, cause I'm not only am I talking but I'm listening to myself at the same time. And I wouldn't even laugh every time I just been like, man there's an old thing inside of me. not enough you got to be perfect or you know nobody's gonna pay attention it's like just a constant system of judgment you know and so man to laugh at myself is just crazy my publicist her

Starting point is 00:34:37 name Alvina she like God give you what you need a lot of times when you don't even know that you need it. And me and her arguing, arguing, arguing, arguing. But she always tell me like, you're going to be great. That's my life's mission, that you be great. So one of the lessons, we have like a lesson every week. And one of the lessons for one week she was telling me, give yourself because I'm super I'm like you I'm super critical on myself I don't honor the commitments I made to myself I'm a bitch yeah you know and here's the crazy thing I would do Kevin I would go I would go for a run one day

Starting point is 00:35:19 or do something and then I'll be like we grinding every day I'm gonna go I'm gonna go run a million mile next week I'm running seven miles. And then the next day I wouldn't even go for a run, but I'd have built up all of this steam in my head like I was in the Olympics. And so then I'd let myself, my aspirations were so diabolical and ridiculous that, but when I let myself down,

Starting point is 00:35:42 I would let myself fall from the heights of my aspirations, not even from, you just took one run. Not even from where you was at. Yes, you just took one run, and you just won neighborhood over. And you got yourself at the Olympic trials in Atlanta. But the shame I would feel would be the fall from the Olympic trials, and I only fucking went,

Starting point is 00:35:58 damn, probably 1,100 feet. That's why everybody that tell me they wanna get into fitness, they be like, what you think I should do first? I say baby steps. Baby steps. Take baby steps. If you walk in the gym and walk out, you still showed up. You did something that you wouldn't have done yesterday. Maybe this time you might get on a treadmill and walk for maybe two or three minutes. I don't know. Who knows? Start drinking more water. Baby steps. like everything is baby steps.

Starting point is 00:36:27 Yeah, I would never even give myself the grace of like, let me have those babies, you know? And you know something else I used to do? I used to compare myself to people that was taking steroids and all of that, and I'm like, I want my body to look like this. And I'm like, yeah. And I used to watch them dudes say stuff like if you ain't

Starting point is 00:36:46 got no six-pack you fat homie and I was like damn I'm fat so I had unrealistic expectations I'm just like you and then I started giving myself grace and I'm like yeah I didn't even come in it to look like that I just wanted my clothes to be able to feel good yeah I just I just didn't want to be Titty Man anymore. Yeah, yeah, he didn't want to have them nice titties on him. Man, and breastesses. I just didn't want to be Titty Man anymore. And then you start comparing yourself to other people

Starting point is 00:37:16 and you lose, we lose ourselves in what we really wanted. What was our goal? I just wanted a bedroom body. That's it, that's it. That's it, that's all. That's it, that's all. I don't want to look good in my pajamas. That's it. Yeah, I just wanted a nice little bedroom body. Now all of a sudden I'm just like, man,

Starting point is 00:37:31 I want to be Hercules. I'm like, no. Oh yeah, I want to have muscles on the side of my cock or whatever. You have them dudes, they be showing, they be flexing their cock. They got one dude, he can flex his cock. I'm like, I don't got to see that.

Starting point is 00:37:42 You been doing them dicklifts. Yeah, you been fucking doing something, bro. Putting a little, get that fishing string, you put it at the end of it with the little weight, the sinker. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And make it flex. With that fishing sinker, that little thing.

Starting point is 00:38:00 Dang, man. No, thank you for saying some of that, dude. Yeah, but the first time I ever laughed at myself, I realized, not a prophet. I'm just not a prophet. I'm just not a prophet. I'm just not a prophet. I'm just not a prophet. I'm just not a prophet. I'm just not a prophet. I'm just not a prophet. I'm just not a prophet. I'm just not a prophet.

Starting point is 00:38:11 I'm just not a prophet. I'm just not a prophet. I'm just not a prophet. I'm just not a prophet. I'm just not a prophet. I'm just not a prophet. I'm just not a prophet. I'm just not a prophet.

Starting point is 00:38:19 I'm just not a prophet. I'm just not a prophet. I'm just not a prophet. I'm just not a prophet. I'm just not a prophet. I'm just not a prophet. I'm just not a prophet. I'm just not a prophet. I'm try to do. Yeah, I'm for a profit. Yeah, but I feel like we can try to share honestly. I'm profitable.

Starting point is 00:38:28 Yeah. I'm just out of profits. What? Only reason I say that, because you know, when you hear about profits, they like these such perfect people. Yeah. I ain't perfect.

Starting point is 00:38:42 I'm going to make some mistakes today. Yeah, huh? Titty man on the loose today, baby. They got a dude at the gym, his name Kevin. When I walk in, he was like, hey, not Titty man anymore. Yeah. Oh, he showed up, huh? Yeah, like, because I did an interview and I was like. Yeah, sorry for calling you Titty man.

Starting point is 00:39:02 No, it's OK. It's no big deal. I was just joking. It's beautiful because that's where I came from. I you titty man. No, it's okay. It's no big deal. Hey, it's beautiful because that's where I came from I was titty man. Yeah, like I was holding a baby and the baby tried to suck my titty I had breasts and that was the most embarrassing moment for me ever I still talk about that to this day and somebody was like no you're one like I said, yeah, I had breasts I was titty man. So then they heard the interview and when I went to the gym, they were like, hey

Starting point is 00:39:31 You're not titty man anymore. I was like, oh I used to stay up and look at my buddy had some tits on in my buddy I was gonna do that thing. I used to think that I had uh, what is called? gyno-glam-ash-gly-no-glam-astra gyno-glam-astra, whatever it's called. Pull it up glana-glam-astra. See what it is. Where is it? in the Middle East? Oh, gynacomastia. Whatever it is, I don't know how to pronounce the word. I be hearing a lot of people say it. They like gyn-o or whatever.

Starting point is 00:39:52 Gynacomastia, a condition where male breast tissue enlarges due to an imbalance of estrogen and testosterone. And they had this surgery where you go get your titty cut out, and I was like, man, ah, do that, I'm tired of this shit. And I didn't know you got abs under here. And when you work the abs, that's what lift, like your ab muscle, don't just, it go all the way up to the pectoral.

Starting point is 00:40:14 And that's what lift it. And then doing dips and doing abs, that's what made all of that disappear, just lift. Got that titty off. Yeah. God. Yeah, my buddy had them and I used to step at night and he'd have his shirt off and I'd look at them bitches, bruh.

Starting point is 00:40:32 I hate that. I liked it. Like when I used to go to the YMCA. Oh yeah, which one? I used to go to the one on college. The old one though, not the new, the old one. Well look at that YMCA and Baton Rouge the one There's one over there by the Walgreens. It's not on college on Foster. Yeah on Foster the whole Foster I used to go to that one. I'm talking about when I used to come out my shirt

Starting point is 00:40:58 They used to free willy talking about the well damn. Yeah. Oh my god Life, I didn't know people were going through that. Yeah, that's AC Lewis right there. That's a good YMCA. Free Willy out there. Yeah. Did you go to school over there ever? Did you go to college over there too?

Starting point is 00:41:16 Something like that. I went to community college. Did you? Where you go, BRCC? Of course. Let's go. Turn up. My sister used to work over there

Starting point is 00:41:23 at cost communications over there, man. I know where that's at. Yeah, my brother went to there at Coss Communications over there, man. I know where that is. Yeah, my brother went to Southern for a little while. Dang, bro, that's wild. What were you studying over there? Business. Yeah. Introduction to business.

Starting point is 00:41:33 And you graduated, bro. I ain't graduated. But overall you did. Yeah, I graduated. Yeah, big facts, man. I'm a billion miles past. Yeah, yeah. Did you get a degree? I, at some point I saw that,

Starting point is 00:41:47 or I read that you got a degree in jail, in prison. Yeah. Is that true? Yeah, that's true. Wow. What were the classes like in there and stuff? What is it? There was no classes, you just test.

Starting point is 00:41:59 I got credits by testing. Oh, so they don't have like, do y'all doall have, do y'all do like, um, I'm trying to think of what it's called. Do y'all have like, um, group projects or whatever? No, you have an administrator that administer the tests. Oh, damn. You test whenever you're ready to test, you test. Well, you can't say whenever you're ready to test, like you might test once a month or something like that. But I had a little way that I was able to keep testing. or something like that, but I had a little way that I was able to keep testing. Shout out to them.

Starting point is 00:42:26 Yeah, shout out to them. But you don't have group projects. I was wondering, yeah, if you got a group project or something, what if your group leader gets put in like in a solitary confinement or whatever? It wasn't like that. Yeah. It was not like that in Louisiana prison.

Starting point is 00:42:40 It was like really every man for they self. So you take your test and then like was it? You studied a curriculum and then you go take a test. Dang. You have an administrator that makes sure you don't cheat. And did other people look down on you if you was trying to study in there or no? No, you trying to get out, just trying to get out the door.

Starting point is 00:42:58 Yeah. Trying to get out the door. Yeah, I was just wondering if you had like a. Now when I went to prison in Chicago, when I, what that's Illinois, it was, I forgot, it's EMCC East Moline, but I forgot the place in Illinois that it was. Now they had individual classrooms, like on the campus.

Starting point is 00:43:22 So y'all would go to class. Yeah, it was beautiful. Dang. That last bit I did, it changed my life completely. That's how I got into yoga. Like they offer programs and everything. At the prison. At the prison and they had weights. I say that like I was living weights.

Starting point is 00:43:40 But they had weights. Like if you wanted to be better, you could become better. But dude that reminds me you ever been at like a hotel or motel and you'll be in the gym working out they have a family just come look at the gym equipment and then just walk out? That just happened to me and you say at the gym? Yeah like you'll be in the gym. That just happened to me and I was in South Carolina. Yeah I was in South Carolina working out at a hotel in a gym.

Starting point is 00:44:07 And they had people passing by the gym, and they would look in the gym, and open the door, and leave out. But they was having like a fraternity reunion there. I forgot what fraternity it was, but it was like from all over the country, they were there having some kind of reunion. Like Panhellenic or something like that maybe? No, they was frets, they was fraternity.

Starting point is 00:44:30 And they told me they was in a fraternity. A few of them came in and talked to me. Masons or something? No, they weren't Masons. They was like college. Oh, Fraldelta's or something? Something like that. Chopperdarts?

Starting point is 00:44:42 And they was like, yeah, bro, we down here for some kind of get together, they having parties. Oh, they drink. Yeah, we big fans. I was like, yeah, thank you. Yeah, sometimes it's wild. I'll be in the gym and people will come in and just look at the gym like, well, look at this,

Starting point is 00:44:56 if it ain't a gym, you know? And then they just leave out. At least they showed up. Yeah, that's a good point, huh? That's baby steps. They showed up. That's baby steps. Yeah, because I was just wondering if you're in jail,

Starting point is 00:45:07 do you have group projects or is there like, most likely to, you know, like that kind of thing? Like, is it like a real, like most likely to succeed or most likely to get out of jail or whatever? It's still individual based learning, but you do earn good time by going to school. I liked it. The way they had it set up in Illinois,

Starting point is 00:45:27 they had programs and you earn good time by going to school. It's like that in Louisiana, in some facilities you earn good time by going to school, but the way they had it set up in Illinois was different. Like they had real programs, like real classrooms that you go to. They got some facilities that offer that,

Starting point is 00:45:47 but it's not the same. So it's more organized over there? Yeah, it was more, I'ma say this. It was based to help people, it was geared toward anti-recidivism. Recidivism is repeat offenders, anti-recidivism is people that go to jail and become better and don't come back. It was geared toward anti-recidivism. Like in Louisiana, it's not geared toward that. It's geared toward

Starting point is 00:46:13 it's a revolving door. You're gonna come back. Right. We'll see you soon. Yeah. Yeah, welcome back. That type of thing. See you next time. You know, like, you going in that, they... We missed you. This is one of the worst things, but it was the most beautiful thing that ever happened too, because I needed this. They called me in, and they had switched my PO. They switched my PO, so they called me in. I go in. I'm thinking, I'm just going to piss.

Starting point is 00:46:39 Yeah. Like, you know, give an update on what's going on. Yeah, put your hands behind your back. Took me to jail. Like, you know, give an update on what's going on. Yeah, put your hands behind your back. Took me to jail. They say you traveled without notifying anybody. I'm like, y'all switch my PO. I had been attempting to contact

Starting point is 00:46:54 and nobody had ever picked the phone up. Dang. And where'd you go? You took a vacation? No, I didn't take a vacation. I was working. I won't say anything. Yeah, in the same spot that the PO had already approved travel for And that's what made me start getting copies of everything right so you got proof of what somebody said

Starting point is 00:47:11 I want can you sign it? Can I get a travel for me? Can you sign it? And I start getting copy. Can you make me a copy? I start keeping a fold and keeping copies. It was beautiful though It made me be more organized Yeah get some organization in your life and recognize Yeah You got to have proof of what's going on even for yourself because you can't even rely on other people's proof because they'll forget the proof, they'll alter the proof. Sometimes, I don't believe it there. Sometimes people get so busy and caught up with what they got going on.

Starting point is 00:47:34 That's true. That is easy to forget. If you're dealing with a hundred different people, you're not going to possibly remember a little old me till my name start buzzing. Right. Well, that's a good point too, because that's an interesting way. Sometimes I'll think, this is the way that I'll think. I'll think, oh, they're doing that on purpose to me, as opposed to what you just said. Sounds like you're like, people. Adversity builds character.

Starting point is 00:47:54 But people got a million things going on. They're not thinking. They're just doing their shit. They say, never suspect malice of what could be mistaken for incompetence. Yeah. Never take as malice for what could be misinterpreted as incompetent And it usually is this usually is just kind of in class people don't just go out of their way to do

Starting point is 00:48:12 Fucked up shit to you. They just be so preoccupied with what they got going on They don't even know that this what they doing. Yeah until made aware But see I do there were times in my head like these motherfuckers That's how they treat but it's not anything like that, you know? But I would take that on. We gonna automatically, you know, we gonna automatically plex. I still plex sometimes, like have a,

Starting point is 00:48:33 develop a complex about feeling like I'm being, you know, mishandled and things of that nature, but I don't even look at it like that, that shit be so petty, cause I look at it now like, it's an invitation for me to lower my frequency. I stay What is something you miss about prison? I don't miss nothing about prison He's gonna something little

Starting point is 00:48:59 This so there's nothing in it, but what about even just getting some rest every now and then was it like that or no I can get rest out here. I need to go to prison for the good rest. Yeah, you're right. You're right, man. I'm trying to, yeah. What'd I miss? Now I'm going to read ads for some of the prisons.

Starting point is 00:49:12 Somebody coming up, girl, somebody coming up making sure you in compliance. Bed made up, all that. I ain't got time for that shit. I do that on my own anyway. And what about a cellmate at night? Like, do people say good night to each other or people just quietly go to sleep?

Starting point is 00:49:26 It depends on if you and your celly cool. If you got a celly and y'all cool like that, you know, but with me, anytime I leave, any cell that I have, they gonna always, man, I'ma miss you, bro. Cause I just, I keep it going. I run EPS and everything. And when I say run EPS, that mean like I'm running an episode,

Starting point is 00:49:48 like we talking about shit. But he might go, when I first get in the cell, he might go by 90 days. My cell is gonna always ask me the same thing. Hey, you sleep all day and you be up all night. You don't watch TV and you don't get on the phone. So I be reading. I just read.

Starting point is 00:50:08 I read books, I got stacks of books, L. Then I don't even go to child. So like say if you indigent, indigent mean don't nobody send you no money. I'm gonna ask you, you got family out there, they love you, they send you money, you gonna tell me no, that what I'm gonna do, I'm gonna put $100 on your books.

Starting point is 00:50:27 You're gonna give me 80, worth of shit, and you're gonna just keep the 20 for you. Yeah, that's business. Yeah, so you know, you eating and I'm eating because I don't even go to child. So I do hookups every night, I cook. So you in your own space then? Yeah, I'm gonna cook every night.

Starting point is 00:50:43 So you kind of try to create your own system within that system, do you feel like in a way? No, that's just how I live. That's how I do my time. I do my business like that. I don't really go to childless's on chicken day. Right. And then... And no judgment on that. I probably don't go on chicken day, because all the chicken gonna get brought to me anyway. And I'm gonna just cut all that up and put that in a soup.

Starting point is 00:51:04 Put that in a hookup. A hookup like where you get a big bowl and you know we cook. You got your own thing going. Now how do you heat the food up in the cell? It depends on what spot we at. It depends on what we at. They got some people they cook on the bone like on the middle. They got some people they got some gels where they give you a high pack, but you gotta rig it for it to make it ball. It depends, some people make a Stinger. What is that?

Starting point is 00:51:32 A Stinger, that's the thing, they hook in the electric socket and a little Stinger. It depends. Oh, there you got somebody grilling something right there on a bed sheet. Yeah. Oh, that's good. It depends on what spot we at.

Starting point is 00:51:46 They have some good chefs in prison? The best. Amen. Amen, dude. Yeah, where's that cooking show, huh? They got people make pizzas, everything. Anything you could think of. Stir fry, everything.

Starting point is 00:51:59 Yeah. I love that. I was locked up in Florida. They got some shit they do. They called making a brick where they take it, man, they put everything in there, turkey sausage, everything. And they just, I'm talking about everything you could think that they can get out of the kitchen.

Starting point is 00:52:13 They put in there and they make it, they cook it in a Dorito bag and make it like a whole brick. Oh yeah. Man, I'm talking about the truth. Good, huh? You ever do a prison night or something at the house and remake some food like that? Or try to, you ever remake any stuff like that

Starting point is 00:52:28 for your friends so they can taste it? Yeah, I done did that for my partners and my little son. He like all that. Oh, hell yeah. But we come from that anywhere on the street, nothing but ramen noodles and all that. We come from that, putting anything you can find in it. Yeah, well the big thing in our house is-

Starting point is 00:52:41 Oh yeah, my partner used to make my, he wasn't my seller, but he was like two dollars down. About three dollars down. He used to make burritos. Oh yeah. Did he really? He's a Mexican guy? Nah, he wasn't Mexican, but he used to make burritos. He pretended he was Mexican for dinner, huh? You'd have thought he was a Mexican. Yeah, I love a burrito, bruh.

Starting point is 00:53:02 Man, he used to make the best ones. I didn't like him at first because I didn't want to do, I like sandwiches, I didn't want to betray a sandwich. Man, he used to do it with all beef, all turkey, all chicken, I'm talking about the truth. My God. Onions, everything, bell peppers, everything. Oh.

Starting point is 00:53:17 He was putting everything in it. Now, all the ingredients, you get them through the jail or some people smuggling a bell pepper. You get that from commissary, but like, like vegetables and shit, all that's going to get broke. That's coming from the kitchen. Yeah. That's going to get broke. That's broke. And what about it got any good desserts in prison? Was there ever like a... Yeah, they got dudes in there that make candy. They got dudes in there that make ice cream.

Starting point is 00:53:38 God dang, really? Wow, I would love that. They got dudes that make everything, you know. Them some of the most creative people you're gonna ever meet in your life. Them some of the most intelligent people you're gonna ever meet in your life. The most intelligent. You talk about weights, you talk about yoga. You got into yoga when you're in there? Yeah, I accidentally got into yoga. How'd that happen?

Starting point is 00:54:00 My partner kept telling me, man bro. But I think a lot of black men, you can't just say I got into yoga. I think you have to be like, I accidentally got into yoga. I was against it. I was all over against it. Oh yeah. He was telling me, man, bro, I'm telling you, bro, they got yoga classes.

Starting point is 00:54:13 I said, well, you go in there and bend over. I'm not going in there and doing shit. You go in there and bend your ass over. So I was like too hard for myself, just whatever, whatever, whatever. So one of my partners from across the hall, he was like, yeah, bro, I'm a whatever. So one of my potters from across the hall, he was like, yeah bro, I'm a highlater, I'm about to go do yoga.

Starting point is 00:54:28 I said, for what? He was like, man, I couldn't even like, he was telling me he had knee pains and all kinds of different pains in his joints. He said, I don't even have that shit no more since I've been doing yoga. He said, man, everything on me, like he said it's been healing my body.

Starting point is 00:54:43 So I'm like, what up? Like two days passed, I give it a try. Going to the first maybe two poses of the shit I did. I'm thinking it's some bullshit like, you know. When you see on TV, you see people, oh, namaste. You know, you thinking it's bullshit. So I did it.

Starting point is 00:55:02 Like maybe after the third pose, I ran to the bathroom and shit it everything. Like it cut my appetite. It's really what started my, kind of started my fitness journey. Like a lot of the people that was lifting weights and doing all that, was still coming to do yoga because I had read in a,

Starting point is 00:55:21 what's that, the Arnold Schwarzenegger encyclopedia? That big yellow book? What's he got on there? He had a big, what's that, the Arnold Schwarzenegger Encyclopedia? That big yellow book? What's he got on there? He had a big, it's called... There it go right there. Arnold Schwarzenegger Encyclopedia, that's the one. But he did yoga. He was like, whenever a lion wake up,

Starting point is 00:55:38 a lion stretch first before they do anything. So I started looking at it. And you know, when you start feeding yourself that that not when you know your brain open up to something different when you reading it because you could you become like an information freak you become like a seeker of knowledge because this is the only thing that stimulating you mentally you know I'm saying you being stimulated by new information so then I was like man yeah, yeah, I'm gonna go fuck with it.

Starting point is 00:56:05 So I started fucking with it. I came home, I got off it, but then I got back on it. And now I'm like fully committed. Oh yeah, dude, I've definitely done some yoga where you'll, I mean, you will shit, you'll have shit, you're like, damn, this shit been missing. It cuts your appetite and everything. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:56:22 If I don't do yoga, I feel weird. Yeah. Oh dude, there's nothing better when you get done with yoga and you cut off the computer or however you do, you know. I love when my yoga coach used to tell me, thank you for allowing me to share this space with you. Namaste. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:56:40 I'm like, I bet you not like this at the house. But in my brain, you know. Oh yeah. Oh dude, yoga sometimes, about there'd be a pose one time, I would do something with my shoulder. I had shoulder pain, all that shit. It unlocked something inside of me, my tears just coming out of my face,

Starting point is 00:56:57 just stuck in my muscles. You know that's crazy? That happened to me, doing a pigeon pose. And I was just in the pose, I was laying there, and I didn't want to lift back up, because I was just crying uncontrollably. And she came and put her hands on my back, and she was like, the energy that you're feeling right now

Starting point is 00:57:16 is not your own, it's just psychic debris. You're having an emotional detox. Damn. Release it. And I was just breathing through it, and then I did the left side, and then I, whoever tell us about emotional detoxes, I ain't grow up knowing about that shit.

Starting point is 00:57:31 I ain't know that everything that we go through dramatically, it harness itself somewhere in some type of muscle fascia, or somewhere in the fascia. I ain't know that shit. Well, there's not a lot of guys, there's not a lot of guys, I don't feel like, where guys I don't feel like where you're from talking about this stuff man. What do you think really took you? Yeah I felt like it was, I'm going to be honest with you.

Starting point is 00:57:50 I did prejudge it. I thought that was for pussies. Oh yeah dude. When they first told me about yoga, I'm not about to do that bitch ass shit. Especially in prison. I didn't even know they had different sports. I thought homosexuality was the only sport in prison. The first thing I told him, I said, man, you go in there and bend your ass over. I'm not about to do it. Yeah, fucking little zesty boy.

Starting point is 00:58:10 Next thing I know, I was doing them warrior poses and all that shit. Hey, you in there. This shit ain't no joke. Yeah, you get in there with your little sugar cane in there. I ain't going in there. That's how I would think at first. You get in there with your little spicy baby body.

Starting point is 00:58:25 Nah, you're the only victim of what you're in the tank. Yeah. Oh, but that was, I was all, that's how I was, I was against everything. Yeah, I used to plex like that. I think in juvenile detention, because you hear so many fucked up stories about jail, when you go in there, they're going to try to fuck you. Yeah, they fucking people.

Starting point is 00:58:40 And you think that's how it's going, so. Don't let no cologne in there. When you go in there, the first thing you do is plex. What I mean by plex, you have a complex. You're in defense mode, but when you get there, you really see that prison is structured. It's really off respect. It's ran off respect, respect around the compound.

Starting point is 00:58:59 Ain't nobody gonna pass by you and not say, excuse me. It's different. Do you admire the level of respect that was in there in some ways? I give my respect first, but at the end of the day, I still demand it. Did you get treated special because you had celebrity in your life?

Starting point is 00:59:19 I wasn't a celebrity at first. Got it. Like juvenile detention through that circuit, I wasn't a celebrity. Was it scary to go back to prison? Like damn, now they know me. Juvenile facilities are more chaotic than adult facilities.

Starting point is 00:59:31 Oh yeah, I can see that's the point. They way more chaotic. So that's where the fighting and all that go on every day. In adult prison, it's structured. It ain't like that, it's laid back. That shit they be showing on TV them Mickey Mouse counts. Yeah. That's not no... Right, it's not real shit. There's not no maximum security, that's not no none of that. Them Mickey Mouse counts. I used to want to... That's not like Louisiana.

Starting point is 00:59:53 Like Louisiana prisons are the roughest prisons from my perspective because I had been around a little bit. I haven't been a prison in Canada. So... That nice. So man they had the best food. Oh man Canada's great. I would go to prison in Canada. It was it was different like the way they respect you there is totally like the way the guards respect you there is different. When you get to Louisiana it's a whole nother story. Yeah always different. This is a different way that people communicate overall. Dude I'll tell you this even what I noticed about racial stuff in Canada when I was up there I feel like it's sometimes in America, especially growing up in the south. There's

Starting point is 01:00:32 There's not there's there's some tension between black and white I feel like but there's a lot of history, right? Louisiana Mississippi our white boys different. Yeah Oh, thank you, but in Canada if you did in Canada, there's no racial tension. They not regular white boys in Mississippi and Louisiana. They built different. Well, some of them got they, some of them seem like... I got a partner right now. Wheels locked up. If you call him G White,

Starting point is 01:01:01 you might as well just go and get ready. Just don't even call him if you call, because you know that be like, what up G White? You know you say that to like, you know he think he a nigga, you know what, what up G White? Man they got some white boy, they not going for that. I'm not going, you not about to call me G White,

Starting point is 01:01:17 we could fight all, hey all, we could play with that knife. And that's how they come and they built like that. Yeah it's changed a little bit, huh? No it ain't changed, it's been like that. You think? Yeah, you got real niggas and bitch niggas everywhere you go. God dang, I hope so. So it's like, it's like.

Starting point is 01:01:32 I'm glad to know that, I guess. Yeah, it's, you're only a victim of what you wanna attain. Yeah. See, like when you went through the sugar cane, baby, that conversation, I ain't even grinning, cause I'm not in. Right. If you grinning, you in.

Starting point is 01:01:44 Oh, dang. That was your conversation. I'm not, I'm not in. If you green, you in. That was your conversation. I'm not talking to me. When you was like, yeah, I want to be in there with my sugar baby and a yoga thing. I said there were men in there. I think there's creative men in there. Yeah, that wasn't my conversation. I'm a real vixxer.

Starting point is 01:02:00 That just went over my head. I ain't no new j. Me too, bro. I ain't about that shit. So when somebody had them kind of head. I ain't no new J. Me too, bro. I ain't about that shit. Yeah, so when somebody had them kind of conversations. I ain't having them. Yeah, that just go over my head. Me too.

Starting point is 01:02:11 Cause if you grin, you in. You're only victim of what you entertain. I'm chilling, I ain't smiling about nothing. I feel that. Not like if you grin, you in, but if you entertain it, Right, oh I see what you're saying. You open the door for that.

Starting point is 01:02:23 Yeah, not me. I'm locking that up And that's one thing I teach my son like Sometimes he'll see something on the internet like a comment. I say hey, you don't entertain that you a man, right? I'll never let nobody defeat you with words. You don't entertain it. How did you start to get to know yourself? Right, you talked about that Solitude really solitude because you're one of the few people you're one of the few kind of rappers I feel like that there are that I've met or experienced or paid attention to that I

Starting point is 01:02:52 know of that talks about that kind of stuff their relationship with themselves right sort of things that we did excuse me I can't say we I'm gonna say I'm gonna speak for me all right most of the things that I did in my life that people would consider heroic or violent That I got stripes for that was out of fear or seeking validation from somebody older than me But how did you start to realize that that that that that's what was going on like that you Like when you say like solitary Being by yourself. Being in solitude, spending time alone.

Starting point is 01:03:28 So what was that practice? Did you have a practice that started? I mean, you said like a little bit of yoga, so that kind of opened up your idea to like doing something different. But what was, was there somebody who started to teach you these practices? Because it's hard to get from just-

Starting point is 01:03:42 When a student ready to learn to teach a pill, once you start walking this path Like this path led me to doing this right now. Mm-hmm today and when I leave here I don't know who I'm a meet that may give me a tidbit of knowledge. That's gonna prepare me forward I don't know and it just you pick it up. The reward really is in the journey So I just pick up little tidbits along the way. Yeah, or how you say tidbits my bad Yeah, that's that Louisiana. That's that Louisiana my tongue heavy that tidbits. Oh, yeah, so I got a look I talk lazy What when you look on your life what's like what are some of the worst pain that you felt like you ever ever been in?

Starting point is 01:04:23 physical emotional emotional probably I would say, or mental. Cause I've heard you talk about trauma and overcoming past traumas. You don't hear a lot of people talk like that. So like, I'm just like. Recently, 2020, I was gonna kill myself. Damn. I had deleted my Instagram for like a year and a half.

Starting point is 01:04:44 I was gonna kill myself. Cause I only felt appreciated for my ability to do. And then I was always looking at Instagram and it was like I was comparing, I was comparing, and I spoke about this before, I was comparing my life to other people's life. And comparison really is the killer of all joy and I didn't understand that until I started looking at my life like damn like I'm

Starting point is 01:05:11 seeing everybody highlight real but at the end of the day I'm just me but everybody else living so great but that's just the highlights that's not what they going through every day and And it took me getting off Instagram and getting off social media period to see that people really do love me and enjoy the world and start having gratitude. Like, think about the things you grateful for. Not what you don't have and not how shit not going

Starting point is 01:05:40 but think about all the good shit and just be thankful. Like I'm grateful for this, I'm grateful for that. And that's when things started to kind of change for me. A lot of people say that kind of stuff, but that's not a practice in their life, right? It's not like a real truth that they're living. I think that's one thing to me that's interesting about you. It feels like that's really how you have chosen

Starting point is 01:05:59 to live your life. What were like practices? I don't have, I'ma be honest. Every day not going to be a good day for me, but I'm still gonna go to the gym. Cause that is my therapy. And I kind of trained myself to know that whenever I have like a fucked up feeling,

Starting point is 01:06:13 like the days that I don't even wanna go, them the days that I had the best workouts. I then kind of start playing a game with myself. I know when certain people start texting me and it's low vibrational people, something good must be about to happen. There's gotta be a text, something good about to happen. And I just started training myself to look at it like that

Starting point is 01:06:32 and that's really how it be going now. Yeah. Yeah, alternate act, like, yeah, taking the opposite choice, making the opposite choice. Cause everything inside of you is like, take it, take off today, take it easy, don't do nothing. I swear to God. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:06:44 Like, I went jogging and everything before I came here. Amen. I heard you talk before about like, a lot of men, you don't feel like are living their truth, right? You're not. I feel like we're in a tough spot, like, with like love and the value, the moral value of relationships and stuff like that.

Starting point is 01:07:02 You're not. Like, ain't nobody really loving people no more. I think I'm the only person right now that's like really living in my authenticity. I'm talking about as far as like on the main stage, like people say what's politically correct, and I don't give a fuck what nobody think about me. Because if everybody like me, then I'm pussy. you know what I'm saying I'm just I want to

Starting point is 01:07:27 be liked by everybody he who is a friend to everyone is a friend to no one I'm not a good I'm not friendly but I'm a great friend and it's just my perspective on it like it's a lot of people that won't allow themselves to love somebody based on their past situations or the bumps and mistakes that they made and for fear of how the rest of the world will look at them. Yeah. I don't care how the world look at me.

Starting point is 01:07:56 Don't care. I'm living life all out. Damn, dude. Really, really. Dude, I'll tell, boom, boom. Really, really. Dude, I'll tell you this, Kevin. I remember times in my life I was like, man, I wouldn't date a certain girl

Starting point is 01:08:11 because of what my friends would think of her, bro. And then I spent like a couple years like that one time. I had that problem, but. But then I missed out on a good opportunity too. Man, once I started fucking, man listen, once I started fucking with this little chick, everybody told me don't fuck with her. She ended up being, and still to this day,

Starting point is 01:08:29 we still good friends. She was one of the most solid people I ever met. And this back from when I was still on the block, shit. And we still cool, she doin' good for herself, nah, she in the real estate and shit, nah, but this from back when I was on the block with her. She was dancin', she used to dance. Everybody, man, don't mess with her, she a stripper,

Starting point is 01:08:48 she, and she ended up being one of the most silent people. And that's when I realized it's the people that the world say the most fucked up shit about be the best people. And the people, everybody that prays and be like, yeah, this person, he's such a great guy. They really be barbaric behind closed doors. They don't have no morals, they don't have no principles, they don't stand for nothing. So I just noticed like some of your better people be the people that everybody don't like. Well I think it's tough

Starting point is 01:09:14 for people. You kind of one of them people like when I say authentic like you pretty much do your own shit. You one of them people. To me, to me, like you live in your authenticity. A lot of people be like, the stuff that you say, a lot of people wouldn't say it for fear of how it would be perceived. You just said it and I'm like, I fuck with you.

Starting point is 01:09:38 I can't help but the fuck with it like. That's a good point, right? You just real people. Thanks for the compliment, man. Yeah, I try my best. I think the tough part is... It was the truth. Like, it was the truth. Right.

Starting point is 01:09:50 I think the tough part is just... I'm just always still trying to figure out who I am, and I'm amazed at new things that come along. Most people want to admit that, like, one of my albums that's about to come out is called Don't Know What I'm Doing, because I don't know what I'm doing. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:10:10 Most people want to admit that they don't know what they're doing. I don't know what I'm doing. I'm still discovering new parts of myself every day. I don't know. People be asking me, so what you going to do today? I don't know. I haven't figured it out yet.

Starting point is 01:10:25 How do you keep your ego, because this is something I've noticed in my life, right? Like my ego, what do I do? What? How do I figure out what is my ego and what is, uh, self confidence and self worth? Like, you know what I'm talking about? Your ego can slip in. To be honest, 2025, some people can say that I'm operating out of ego,

Starting point is 01:10:47 but I'm not giving to nobody but me. Like I'm not, I've given everything I had to give and now everybody else can just figure it out. And we can say that's ego, that's cool, but when I go to the gym, I don't ego lift. I don't lift the heaviest weights in there. I do what's comfortable for me. I work at my own pace.

Starting point is 01:11:11 Hey, you know, what I eat doesn't make you shit and what you eat doesn't make me shit. So if you want to go in there and be the world's strongest person, you know, good luck, buddy. Yeah. Great for you. Do what works for me.

Starting point is 01:11:27 And I always make sure am I getting what I came for? I just want to get what I came for. Like what do you mean by that? Like when I go to the gym, I don't get sidetracked and hoaxalizing. What I mean by hoaxalizing is, I knew I had this interview today and I already made the commitment so I'm going to honor that commitment.

Starting point is 01:11:48 So when I went, I'm just giving you an illustration or example. So when I went to the gym today, I went in there to get what I came for. I ain't coming here to be friendly. I ain't coming here to hoaxalize. And what I mean by hoaxalizing, you know your uncle paid by y'all over there, hoaxalizing. Yeah, y'all over there hoaxalizing. You lying to Hoselizing, yeah, y'all over there hoselizing. You lying to him and he lying to you, y'all lying to each other.

Starting point is 01:12:08 I ain't coming here to hoselize. Yeah, man, I think having parameters for yourself and boundaries for what your goals are, that's I think what- And had I not did what I needed to do to raise my frequency, me going to the gym today was committing to act of self love, I wouldn't have been able to do this.

Starting point is 01:12:29 I feel great now. Yeah. Yeah, and you're- I feel amazing. Yeah, your energy comes in and yeah, it's funny, because you come in, I feel like damn, I got to, I want to be on a level. Well, you came in when I saw Jesse,

Starting point is 01:12:43 and every time I see Jesse, I'm Jesse is a friend, and he's always been a good friend of mine. Lately, something's changed. If you're watching this, Jesse, shout out to you, Jesse. Yes. He was like, every time I see him. He's locking with those eyes. He was like, every time he sees me,

Starting point is 01:13:00 he makes a song about stealing my fucking girl. And that's just a joke that we got every time I see it. Good to see you, Jesse, bro. Jesse, if you're watching this. He's watching, man. If you're watching, Jesse, this one's for you, brother. You buddy is for you, buddy. Did you have self-hatred and stuff?

Starting point is 01:13:21 Did you deal with that? Of course. How do you know you had it? My actions. You know who told me, who kind of started the conversation? I was talking to Plas one day. Really? Yeah, and it may not seem like it, but that's a real intelligent dude.

Starting point is 01:13:40 So he was like, man, Gaze, there's something I be noticing, bro. He said, Gaze, man, you be acting like a ugly nigga, man. I said, what you mean? You just be, you be moving around like a ugly nigga, man, and you not no ugly nigga, you handsome, but I'm just saying you be like a ugly nigga. And I be like, what you mean? Man, you got to ask him, say, kid, it ain't with you.

Starting point is 01:14:01 Can't nobody be just touching you. And then we were sitting down at the table and a lady was trying to tell me, he said, hold on, I'm scared of it with you, can't nobody be just touching you. And then we were sitting down at the table and a lady was trying to tell me, he said, hold on, I'm delicate. I didn't know what he meant, but he was talking about setting those energetic boundaries for yourself like everybody not supposed to have access to you, because it's texting on your spirit, it's draining.

Starting point is 01:14:20 It's draining. Certain phone calls is draining. Hello? Oh. Yeah. What's going on? They about to tell you some bullshit, some bad news. I don't want to hear that shit.

Starting point is 01:14:31 Yeah. Maybe that's my ego. You act like you don't care. I don't. It's not that I don't give a fuck. I could just give a fuck less. Yeah. I care about me.

Starting point is 01:14:43 Right. Fuck that. I don't want to hear that shit. Damn. Yeah, it's so true, man. Because a person that don't- You'll take it on. A person that don't- you're not doing the work every day. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:14:55 So it's like, I'm doing the work every day. So a person that's not doing the work every day, it's really nothing you could tell me because I'm doing the work every day. Like, I go weeks sometimes without eating when I'm fasting when I need clarity I just stop eating. I'm three days in no food you wouldn't even go three hours. Yeah. I'm hungry I have a headache. That's your body detoxing. So I don't even listen at people like that. Yeah. Oh yeah. People don't care. People get all fattened out or whatever they cook.

Starting point is 01:15:26 Yeah, people just wasting your time. I mean, food could be used as a drug sometimes. Sometimes food could be used as a coping mechanism because I used to use food as a coping mechanism. Sometimes I overeat or sometimes I wouldn't eat. What would your snack be if you had a Destin, like an evening snack, nighttime snack, goodnight Kevin or whatever snack?

Starting point is 01:15:47 Now or then. Back then. I used to drink a lot of syrup. Straight syrup? No, I used to mix it with like the pineapple, the pineapple sun kiss. That's when Activist was out. I used to like the cough syrup.

Starting point is 01:16:02 I used to mix it with pineapple sun kiss, Sprite and Mountain Dew, them was my favorites. I used to like the cough syrup. I used to mix it with Pineapple, Sun Kiss, Sprite, and Mountain Dew. Them was my favorites. Damn, and some syrup? Yeah. What kind of low cabin light or whatever? Uh-uh.

Starting point is 01:16:12 And then I used to have to eat. What was my thing, my favorite thing to eat? I liked the them little crust, the uncrustables, the little peanut butter and jelly. I liked the dim. And what else I used to eat? Something else I used to eat all the time. I don't know if it was.

Starting point is 01:16:33 Doritos maybe or something. I don't know if it was chicken wings. It was something. I forgot. It was something I used to eat all the time. I forgot. I know it was unhealthy, whatever it was. But you're talking about drugs. Yeah, I used to coding syrup. Yeah, okay. I didn't know you're talking about it first

Starting point is 01:16:49 Yeah, wow, you were addicted to it. I know say addicted but you enjoy I didn't like it. I loved it. Yeah Yeah It's but now we went to rehab either you did it Rehabs for quitters. I'm not trying to quit. How, but you don't do that anymore though. Cause I found a new drug. Fitness.

Starting point is 01:17:14 Yeah. My new drug of choice. Do you notice though, are you able to notice a different feeling of how much different you feel making those choices? Yeah, I miss, yes, I'ma be honest. And I hate to say what I'm about to say. When people be like, I miss the old Kevin, I get it.

Starting point is 01:17:31 Cause I miss the old Eminem when he was on drugs. That's the Eminem I like. That's the Eminem I like. I like the Eminem that was on drugs. So I know what people mean when they, man I miss the old Kevin. I'm like, I get it. was on drugs. So I know what people mean when they, man, I miss the old Kevin. I'm like, I get it. I get it.

Starting point is 01:17:49 Because I miss him too. I do, but I'm not about to sacrifice the way I feel for that. Like I love where I'm at now. Well, I think that's a trap too, is to stay where you are. You know, it's a trap. You can grow with me or you can grow without me,

Starting point is 01:18:06 but either way, it's on with and up with me. But I do get it though when people say, man, I miss the old Kevin, because I miss the old Emondale. I do. I miss the old Emondale. I swear to God I do. Oh yeah, I believe that.

Starting point is 01:18:18 I miss there's times in my own life that I miss. There's times in my own life where I felt like I was funnier or like had better ideas and stuff, but things just changed and sometimes it's different. Nah, I like where I'm at, nah. Yeah? I like where I'm at, nah. Man, I'm a motherfucking supermodel, man.

Starting point is 01:18:34 I love where I'm at, nah. This shit different now. I used to couldn't even do the wheel to add wheel, now I do that shit effortless. Really? I go jogging in the morning effortless. It's just automatic. When I stretch, it's effortless. Really? I go jogging in the morning effortless. It's just automatic. When I stretch,

Starting point is 01:18:45 it's effortless. When I fuck my bitch, it's just effortless. Wow. And I just, I do everything better and I hate to say what I just said, but it's the God honest truth. I just, I wouldn't change this for the world. It was time drinking, sir. My dick wouldn't even get hard. Oh yeah. And not to get off on those six-week related types, but I had erectile dysfunction at 20, what, 23, 24 years old because of all the drugs I was doing. So I'm okay. Oh. Never trade that for this.

Starting point is 01:19:16 I love when I'm in now. I can sing better. Like my singing voice has matured now because I'm not on drugs. So I love when I'm in. Now the music that I make is I make music that I can work out in the gym to now. So I, you know, not other, I get it though. I get it. I understand.

Starting point is 01:19:35 But I don't care. But I understand. Yeah. I miss the old gates. Yeah. Oh dude. Yeah. I think.

Starting point is 01:19:44 Great. But I think the new gates. Oh, dude. Yeah, I think. But I think the new gates is really prophetic. I think the new gates says some things that are really. Man, the old bro say bro I love you bro. You scaring me right now. I am? Yeah.

Starting point is 01:20:00 Sorry. I don't want to be a prophet. That's scary. Yeah, that won't. That's scary. Like, that's scary when you say shit like that. Like, you know, that's crazy. Like, you're the first person that I ever said in front of that said that to me. Like, thank you, I love you for being able to see me.

Starting point is 01:20:22 But that's scary. Yeah, maybe that's's unnecessary kind of like. And I don't mean it like that. It's somebody else that when they see this, they're gonna be like, see, I told you. Because there's some people that argue with me, like I told you you was a prophet. I'm like, but prophets are perfect.

Starting point is 01:20:38 I'm not perfect. No, I don't think that. I wouldn't have made it in the book. Hey, it's a good thing I wasn't around Jesus. I would have made us look bad. Yeah, instead of a disciple, you didn't need a disciple. I would have made us look bad. You know what I said?

Starting point is 01:20:53 In general, most religious traditions do not consider prophets to be perfect in the sense of being entirely free from error or sin, while they're often revered for the divine connection and ability to convey God's message. There's still a lot of pressure. I just like, man, I like the new bars you have just as much as the old bars, man. That's what I like. At least somebody cares. That's what I like, dude.

Starting point is 01:21:14 At least somebody cares. But it's just, and it's not to say that you wrong for saying that. It's just a few people in my camp, in my circle, they'd be like, you know, you're a prophet, right? And I'm like, no, I don't want to say that you wrong for saying that, it's just a few people in my camp, in my circle, they be like, you know you're a prophet, right? And I'm like, no, I don't want to be that. And I guess it's me shying away from the responsibility of it. I don't want that responsibility.

Starting point is 01:21:36 If I said something and it helped, take it for what it's worth. I made a bunch of mistakes to get to, whatever knowledge and wisdom I gave you, I made a bunch of mistakes to get to whatever knowledge and wisdom I gave you. I made a bunch of mistakes to get to that point. How do you be a parent that was different than how you was parented? Because that's one of the most important things. We could go anywhere. We could go anywhere like because the truth hurts but it heals. So we could go, we could have any kind of conversation. What makes me a better parent is I was sexually victimized

Starting point is 01:22:12 and I didn't have a safe place to communicate. I created a space for my children to communicate with me. So they say when you work on yourself, you heal seven generations backwards and seven generations forward. And damn, I hate to say this, but somebody before me, they was sexually victimized also, so it was like something that kind of ran in the family.

Starting point is 01:22:38 Oh yeah, like a learned behavior, or okay, yeah. It was like, they had went through the same thing. And by me creating that space for my children to be able to communicate with me, don't nobody never touch you. You always talk to me, I don't judge my children. Long as you tell me the truth, I'm never going to be upset with you no matter what it is. I'm here to help you figure it out. That's me.

Starting point is 01:23:03 So anyway, I broke those generational curses or excuse me, generational traumas, let's say that. They're not generational curses, generational traumas. So, I broke that. And the reason I don't really speak on it like because it was, um, my family's still kind of healing from this situation. Yeah, that's understood. Like me and my mother, we got a beautiful relationship now. Like it's super beautiful, but it was strange for a while because I wasn't able to communicate.

Starting point is 01:23:33 So now it's beautiful because we communicate and me going back and forgiving my mother and forgiving myself and things of that nature, you gotta realize they didn't know what they was doing. Nobody handed them a pamphlet and said, this is how you rear children. Yeah. So when they hear shocking news like that, the first thing they do is panic. They don't think to act.

Starting point is 01:23:56 But me, I think to act. I don't think to just say, oh God, oh, that's not how you stop bullying. Fighting solves everything. I teach my stop bullying. Fighting solves everything. I teach my children that. Fighting solves everything. Like I tell my son, like if you go to school and if somebody say something to you, don't worry about that.

Starting point is 01:24:14 But if somebody put their hands on you, you punch them right in their nose and you don't stop. You keep going. When I come to the school, I'm going to be like, I can't believe you did all this bitch ass shit. I swear to God, I'm gonna kill your motherfucking ass. I'm gonna make it look good when I get there. Then after that, I'm gonna take you

Starting point is 01:24:30 and buy you every toy in the store. Because fighting solves everything. You got to, yeah, you got to. We don't, what's that coach? That Texas, what'd he say? We don't raise no pussies. I forgot that coach. Who was that? I forgot his name. The football guy? Yeah, he said, we don't raise no pussies Yeah, he said we don't raise no pussies he died didn't he I forgot the coach name I just seen that shit Yeah, Michael Leach. He was like we don't raise no pussies. Yeah. Yeah, but that's just

Starting point is 01:24:57 That's just one of my biggest things when I could say to the way our parent is different. Mm-hmm I don't parent like that. I parent different. Like, well you used to like, yeah. I parent like Coach Knight. Yeah. But, yeah, I parent like Coach Knight. I parent like a coach. Okay.

Starting point is 01:25:18 My grandfather was like a coach, like that tough love. That's how I parent. Yeah, I think people don't realize how they look at their children too is important. If you always look at your child with like, will you go do that or this is wrong or something, then they feel like something is always wrong, right? Like the look you put into your child's eyes,

Starting point is 01:25:37 like your child is kind of like a cup and you're like a picture. It is accountability going on. They have to make their beds, they have to go to school, they have to do these things, and if not, then you can't play the game. You're gonna have to take accountability. My son and my daughter know.

Starting point is 01:25:50 And my daughter, she not even 13 yet, she came to me and told me, Daddy, is there anything I could help do around the house to make your life more easier? One of her choices is you keep the kitchen clean. Still gotta make your bed, still gotta go to school, but you keep the kitchen clean. My son, you gotta make your bed, still gotta go to school, but you keep the kitchen clean. My son, you gotta make your bed, still gotta go to school,

Starting point is 01:26:08 but you make sure the trash put out. And I just give them little jobs. And then you earn your wages. Yeah. I pay them 250 a week. Do you really? $250? Yeah. Yeah, damn, bruh.

Starting point is 01:26:23 I pay them 250 a week. You want Robux, you want that, you know you gotta, I pay them. Wow. Damn, they could have a- But they work. Oh yeah, they could have a Chevy Sedan by September. That's a good amount of money. Yeah, my daughter, she like, into the furry costumes.

Starting point is 01:26:40 They be dressing up like, don't kill me, because I don't want to say she real defensive about this. No dad, it's not, that's what it's called, it's called this, I don't know the name of it. But they dress up like animals in. I did it one time with her. And that was my way of like going into her world.

Starting point is 01:26:57 And she was like, I want to post the video that me and you did on TikTok, but I'm scared people are going to hate on it. I said, promise me you're going to do one thing. She said, what? I heard Floyd Mayweather say this. Say, no matter what you do, if you do something good, if you do something bad, if you do something for yourself

Starting point is 01:27:14 or you do something for other people, people gonna always have something to say about you. So just promise me that you're gonna make yourself happy. Oh yeah, that's me right there. Watch me, I'm about to come in on the first. Yeah, that's me right there. Which one? I'm about to come in on the furry. Yeah, that's me right there. Look. Ooh, Kevin, yeah, that's beautiful, man.

Starting point is 01:27:28 Ooh, ooh, wow. And what animal is that? I don't know what I was. I think I was like a little wolf or something. Yeah, that's a damn little Cajun wolf. And then, so she was afraid to post it, but then once she posted it, the shit went viral. Like, cause she was already lit in the furry community.

Starting point is 01:27:49 I hope I'm saying it right easily if you watching me don't. Yeah, young lady, we're just trying to- I love you. Your father just honoring what you guys got going on there. I think that's it. But that was my way of going into the whole world. Right, and saying, look, I'm proud of what I do.

Starting point is 01:28:02 I spend time with my daughter, yeah. Yeah, like- It's important. I'm proud of them. Like, just telling them you love them every day, hugging on them and letting them know how I'm proud of you. Oh, yeah. Like that reassurance. Oh, dude. They're not afraid to make me mad. You know what they're afraid to do? Disappoint me. The same way I'm afraid to disappoint God, they're afraid to disappoint me. Yeah. That relationship is just so important, man. It's so important, you know? Like, yeah, I remember, I was just, I was so angry as a kid, man. I wish I'd had that relationship. I used to get angry, like if I see somebody spending time with their father playing basketball,

Starting point is 01:28:42 I'd be like, yeah, cuz I wanted it but now I am that And then I can't be upset with my real father cuz we have beautiful times together. Oh, yeah We have some beautiful times together the times we had. Yeah What was a special time? You're my mom. I remember one time. So my mom delivered like newspapers and stuff, you know, so One time I think I got sick as I couldn't go to school But she had to work and so I got to go on her route with her and she would go and then we took a ride went out to but over by picayune and We went they had a Wendy's over there and we got a Wendy's

Starting point is 01:29:20 Sandwich over there and it was like the only time I ever remember doing something just me and my mom but I remembered us everything about it how how I was sitting, what we were doing. Just we had like a nice day together, you know? But I had to get sick at school to even just because my mom always had to work. So I'm not like whining about it. It's just like, but I remember that it was important to me, you know? As we get older, sometimes it let us know that the act of love that they had coming from where we come from was them sacrificing time with us

Starting point is 01:29:53 to make sure that we had food on the table. Looking at it in hindsight, it's a good thing. Makes me like, damn, I appreciate you more. Even my children understand, in October. I'm going on tour I love y'all, but I got to go do this, but I love y'all right So I spend as much time as I can with y'all, but also I gotta go do this in October, but I love y'all Yeah for me to have a new perspective instead of man

Starting point is 01:30:20 I bet my mom didn't want to leave me to go to work instead I'm thinking what parent does right nobody leaves earth saying hey I should have wish I could have spent more time throwing the papers out delivering the papers everybody leave even the most the richest businessmen on me and on earth they leave and say I wish I could have spent more time with my family yeah but it's beautiful because it's about balance and I don't beat myself up for the time that I'm not there I understand that they understand Cuz I talk to them. Yeah, I don't baby talk. I talk to them regular. Yeah, I think that's the biggest thing is communicating

Starting point is 01:30:54 What's going on? Probably, you know What uh, yeah, what's do what's different about your tour this time? Well, how do you feel about it? Like do you notice that that changes for you as you grow up? What's different about my tour this time? Because in October it starts, yeah? Me. Me. It's just another thing.

Starting point is 01:31:12 I'm different. I'm not the same person I was last year. I'm better. OK. Way better. And man, I could go down the list. But I can say one of the biggest things, I start giving myself grace.

Starting point is 01:31:30 I don't beat myself up no more. I used to beat myself up. Yeah. What would you say, like in your head, what would that be like you think? I beat myself up. The way I would beat myself up is I would replay something I did and it'll bring shame till I almost cringe when I think about it like,

Starting point is 01:31:53 no man, plus I tell myself, excuse me, you probably don't know this, I talk to myself. All geniuses talk to theyself. Ever since I read that it kind of gave me the green like to start talking to myself more. But if I do something, I be like, players fuck up too. Players fuck up too.

Starting point is 01:32:14 Players do fuck up. Players fuck up too. And I always tell myself, I'm like, players fuck up too. Learn from your mistakes, don't make them one more. And I talk to myself, I used to be hard on myself like a coach, like, hey bitch. But I'm still like a coach in the gym.

Starting point is 01:32:30 I be like, hey, the weights ain't gonna push theyself. You know what I'm saying? You got enough strength to do that, but you ain't got enough strength to lift a cup and get up and go to the gym. You know what I'm saying? So it's just, I'm more like motivational toward myself with that, but if it's a,

Starting point is 01:32:53 because you know you have moments that might come up from the past and it might just come up in your mental inventory and then when it come up instead of running from it. All the time I go like that. Instead of, yeah, I do that all the time and then you know what I started doing? I see it with it, man.

Starting point is 01:33:07 Play us fuck up too. That shit ain't nothing. You the only one remember that, Kevin. Don't nobody else even remember that shit. That's crazy. Don't nobody remember that shit. The only thing keeping that feet, that messed up moment alive is you.

Starting point is 01:33:19 Yeah, I'm giving energy to that bullshit, man. Play us fuck up too, man. I'm fly. Play us fuck up too, bro. Play us fuck up too, man. I might walk out of us fuck up too. Play us fuck up too, man. I might walk out of here and trip, but I'm gonna make, hey, it's gonna be a fly. When I trip, I might do a little dance move or something.

Starting point is 01:33:32 It's gonna be a fly trip when I trip. Oh, yeah, boy. Ain't nobody trip better than me. Yeah, man, that's gonna be beautiful, a little trip. Play us fuck up too. Dude, if I see you trip, I'm gonna be like, man, play us, hey, that's graceful, bro. Play us fuck up too. I if I see you trip I'ma be like man, play us, hey, that's graceful bro, play us fuck up too. I'ma laugh at myself.

Starting point is 01:33:47 Yeah. I don't care who see me make a mistake. I've been on stage sometimes, make a mistake. Hey excuse me, I just made a mistake. Hey the beautiful thing about mistakes is, it's okay for people to see you make a mistake. Just don't ever let a motherfucker see you quit. You gonna watch me make mistakes

Starting point is 01:34:02 but you ain't gonna never watch me quit. Hell yeah. I still, like I tell people, I still don't get tired. I've been up since 3.30. Oh yeah, I've heard that in your song too. Yeah, I still don't get tired. I've been up since like 3.30 this morning. Dang, bro. I'm fucking fired up all of a sudden.

Starting point is 01:34:21 Yeah, energy I wanna translate to more energy. Is that true? Yeah, want to translate to more energy. Is that true? Yeah, like energy translates to more energy. Now once I go eat my meal, I'm supposed to be having dinner tonight. That's why I have on this suit. Okay, it's nice, yeah. Yeah, I'm supposed to be having dinner.

Starting point is 01:34:39 But, to me. But anyway, but uh. You got a date for dinner or no? I'm supposed to be having dinner, but after I eat that meal, kind of get some good rest. Oh, I love that.

Starting point is 01:34:54 I love getting a good rest. Do you have, I'm gonna ask you a couple more things before you go. You have a, you are religious, man. Mm, religious smidges. Yeah. You have a, you are a religious man? What'd you say? Religious smidges. Yeah. Religious smidges.

Starting point is 01:35:10 But yeah, I guess. Or do you feel like a, cause people say that you're a Muslim man. I'ma be honest, I'm spiritual. Okay. I'm spiritual. But like the word Muslim in Arabic, it only means believer.

Starting point is 01:35:23 Right. So I'm a believer, but I'm very spiritual. Got it. Like, I believe spirituality is if I walk in a room and something don't feel right and I leave, something bad happen, I believe I was guided by God to leave. I done been in a club in New York. I'm like, come on, let's go.

Starting point is 01:35:44 We go outside. Sometimes we go outside, a fight break out, somebody get shot. But I just felt like it was time to go. And I just always been like this. No Frills delivers. Get groceries delivered to your door from No Frills with PC Express.

Starting point is 01:36:01 Shop online and get $15 in PC optimum points on your first five orders. Shop now at nofrills.ca. Why do you think it's so hard for us to step into what we really believe we want? Because when I hear you say that, that's what it hits me as. I've been saying that though.

Starting point is 01:36:16 I say it in my song. I say, when the Lord said, my new wife will pray to God, and I'm going to keep her sacred. I say that in the song, so I manifested this. I didn't know it was gonna be her. But as men, why do you think it's so hard for a lot of men to just, yeah, it's like,

Starting point is 01:36:32 man, I'm just so tired of everything that's not remain something. Cause you don't get fulfillment. I done had more hoes than clothes. I never got no fulfillment from having a bunch of different women. That shit is stressful. It's vexating to my spirit. It don't give me no fulfillment from having a bunch of different women. That shit is stressful It's vexed say it into my spirit It don't give me no fulfillment a lot of men ain't gonna say that and then I've been on a semen retention journey for the last

Starting point is 01:36:52 What maybe five years I talked about like retaining the life force retaining the semen Now watching porn not jacking out taking that sexual energy and transmuting it into something else So if I have a craving to go jack off or I'm horny or whatever you want to call it, I go to the gym or I go to the studio, I transmute that energy into something else. And most people that's out here jacking off. And you realize though when you see dudes with a lot of women, but them dudes be stressed out. Like you know what I'm saying? As a man you're gonna see shit that you gonna look,

Starting point is 01:37:27 but at the same time, you ain't gonna help me on my mission. You gonna take away. You ain't gonna add value to me. You gonna take from me. Behind closed doors, do you speak life into me? Do you help me become greater? Are you helping me become greater? Like, it don't really be that. And if you are helping me become greater, are you helping me become greater? Like it don't really be that and

Starting point is 01:37:45 if you are helping me become greater are you helping me become greater for me or you helping me become greater for you? Are you manipulating me? Are you verbally abusive to me behind closed doors? You know what I'm saying? Like are you using my flaws against me? You know there's a lot of women that'll do that too and no excuse me I can't say women it's a lot of people that'll do that too. And no, excuse me, I can't say women. It's a lot of people that'll do that. Oh, for sure. Because I done had men do that too,

Starting point is 01:38:08 like bring up stuff from the past and try to hold it against me to keep you within whatever kind of energetic construct that they have for you because they need your energy. Their, everybody's life is great, but we suffer. So that's why I'm here with it right now Yeah, that seems to be something that's kind of vexing our I wouldn't even gonna talk about this, but She you don't want you got it all be I wasn't trying to get anything

Starting point is 01:38:36 I'm just trying to know but it's like this gonna be healing for somebody. Oh, it's healing for me That's why I'm curious about it. It's like cuz I'm sick of like You know I'm like but also I'm the one keeping me me. That's why I'm curious about it. It's like cuz I'm sick of like, you know in my life But also I'm the one keeping me there. That's the crazy thing It's like I have the ability to change things and I do a good job I say in my song I'm only excited about spiritual things and I swear I can't wait to move on I'm only excited about spiritual things. Yeah, I think I'm just amazed sometimes that uh, I Don't know but I'm also I you know, I got a late start sometimes

Starting point is 01:39:07 Man, I got a late start. I'm 39. I Just look you upset. Oh, yeah, don't age. I'm 39 though. So I feel like it's never too late. Yeah It's never too late. But when you said that about all the women that shit was draining Yeah, we'll just I have so many of my friends, like I'm going on this date, I don't care. Just like, well what are we doing? And then you have people, it's like you're giving yourself away to people, and I'm not accusing anybody,

Starting point is 01:39:34 that's what I'm talking about myself and my own life. And then it's just. Tell me about it. Yeah. Tell me about it. And it's like, what kind of journey am I making? What am I really building here? And then another word, once I start operating and looking for reciprocation it shouldn't cost anything

Starting point is 01:39:50 If I fuck with you, it shouldn't cost anything If you fuck with me, it shouldn't cost us anything. It should be reciprocated The energy that I'm giving you should be reciprocated if it's not reciprocated Then you're not nobody that I even need to know. And a lot of times, when you look at relationships, I could be somebody's best friend, but they're not my best friend. It's not the energy not being reciprocated.

Starting point is 01:40:17 And a lot of people are victims of that, being in relationships that are one-sided. The door don't really swing both ways. It may look like it swings both ways, but it don't. Yeah, it's just a trap too. I mean, a lot of the date, like the sex, the dating, just the pornography, because that's been something I've dealt with, you know?

Starting point is 01:40:36 When you stop watching porn, it's going to change everything. Yeah. It's going to change the way you have sex. Once you realize these people acting, this is fake. This is not real, this is not a connection, this is bullshit. No disrespect to people that do porn, it's just. But they know it, they know it's fake.

Starting point is 01:40:53 You know, they know it's. That's just not my cup of tea, that just ain't no. Like, how a man told me he was like, you jacking off to another man's success. Like, I ain't fucking that bitch. Dang, that's crazy, God, oh my God. I'm jacking off to watching another man's success. Like I ain't fucking that bitch. Dang, that's crazy. God, oh my God. I'm jacking off to watching another man's success.

Starting point is 01:41:09 I'm not doing this. It is kind of crazy, huh? If you really think about it, it's psychotic in nature. And then you gotta hide and sneak to do it. They got some people probably just go do it publicly, but you gotta sneak and do it. Yeah, I sneak and do it. And then under the guise of I'm having me time. Yeah, but then after you do it you feel guilty You're horrible like damn why I did it because there was precious life for us. I just wasted on somebody else success

Starting point is 01:41:38 God dang it Listen, I've been there. I've been there. I know about it So I've been there and what was the thing that got you out of that? Like how'd you able to stop that specifically? I took baby steps. I was like, I'm only going to release on Fridays. Okay. Shabam, shaboom, huh? And I started saying, well, maybe this is my creative energy. When you release your life force, that's your creative energy. So I'm not gonna release my creative energy. Like when you boxing, or you preparing for a fight,

Starting point is 01:42:09 when I'm working on this album, I ain't gonna release no semen. Or while I'm doing this, I ain't gonna release, and it just, I became better and better and better. But it was baby steps. I ain't just start off just saying cold turkey. But by the time it was like, man. It's semen has babies in it, which is crazy. And you taking baby steps

Starting point is 01:42:26 Yeah, if I ain't getting no pussy, that's wrong If I ain't getting no pussy, she ain't no pussy. Yeah, what am I doing? I can wait. Yeah, I can wait That's the thing is just that relationship with yourself, you know and having like having conversation with yourself Like what am I doing? What do I what would I really like to do and then how do I get through this. You respect yourself different. Yeah your integrity changes a lot. I respect myself different now that I only play around like this. Yeah. I respect myself different now. And when you show up people because here's the funny thing people can see the the integrity you have for yourself. You know what people tell me? They say your aura is big. I'm like I don't know why and they were like what kind of practices do you do? I practice semen retention

Starting point is 01:43:09 Yeah, it's my precious life force and it was like That's what it is. You have a glow. That's back. Yeah, I said semen damn It's your life force. Oh, yes, everything you are. It's your truth. It's your script It's just I mean that is you that yeah, it's everything you are. It's your truth, it's your script. Yeah. It's your, I mean that is, and it's not even your script, it's a script of all your ancestors. Just wasting it in a sock. And you, yeah, you blasting it out here

Starting point is 01:43:33 in a dang church sock too at times, God. Oh my God. I forgive myself. Yeah, you're right, man. Cause sometimes I'll have that shame feeling. All the misfires, I forgive myself. Yeah. We learn from ourfires, I forgive myself. Yeah. We learn from our mistakes, we move on.

Starting point is 01:43:48 But somebody needed to hear this. No, I think somebody did today. And I think, you know what, I think it's like, we need more leaders in the community to say things like that. We have to get, I don't know, we got to do something, has to start to be different, I feel like. The greatest teachers teach without teaching. Yeah, you're right. The greatest teachers teach without teaching. Yeah, you're right.

Starting point is 01:44:06 The greatest teachers teach without teaching, so when the student's ready to learn, the teacher will appear. You'll be amazed where wisdom could come from. Yeah. Even the homeless person standing on the street corner, it smell bad. The person that you would be afraid of,

Starting point is 01:44:21 the person that you would look down upon, one of those people, the wisdom and the knowledge that they can impute that you would look down upon, one of those people, the wisdom and the knowledge that they can impute, you would be amazed. Oh yeah, they got bars over there. I mean, I don't care what you do with the money, just, I committed to act a given. He's just gonna buy drugs with it.

Starting point is 01:44:37 I committed to act a given, whatever he do, that's his choice. Now one lady made me mad though, cause she was holding a sign, talking about she had worked for food, and gave her a sandwich and she put it in her book set and then I said you know what maybe she had children to go feed but I don't know like yeah. What she thinks you gonna sell it? Maybe you had children to go feed or something so I was like I did overreact because I got

Starting point is 01:45:03 pissed off. Kevin not everybody eats immediately when you serve them. I mean, you know, maybe she was saving it for later. I don't know. Maybe she got baby birds in a nest or something. I don't know. Maybe she got saving it for her kids or something. And I just said, you know what, I ain't tripping. Whatever you do with it as long as you,

Starting point is 01:45:18 I committed to act a given. Probably so, Kevin, I bet. Yeah, I think she probably is doing something nice, hopefully. I hope so. Yeah, I bet she will. I hope you, I think she probably is doing something nice. Hopefully I Hope so. Yeah, I bet you will hope you ain't take advantage of me Yeah, if you did this if you did as your cosmetic bag, right? I did I did the right thing, right? I did what I did. Yeah kind of like man. I think one interesting thing is like Yeah, we just we need we got to have leaders making things cool you know, I

Starting point is 01:45:44 think it's why it's one, to me, and this might be, I guess I'm afraid to say this probably, cause it's probably. Where'd he say go? I think it's cool to have a black man say something about that, because black people notoriously, I feel like make things cool, right?

Starting point is 01:46:00 Like people go to the black community to make something cool. Like you give a metal plate to somebody in a black community, then they got a rim out of it. You know what I'm saying community to make something cool. Like you give a, you give a metal plate to somebody in a black community, then they got a ram out of it. You know what I'm saying? They make things cool. So I think to hear a black- Creativity thrives in the darkness.

Starting point is 01:46:13 Okay. Well said. You didn't say anything wrong. Okay. So I think to hear a black guy say that to act certain ways, I think that makes it cool. Because we all take, I feel like a lot of culture comes from what's cool comes from the black community. Creativity thrives in the darkness. So you're not saying nothing wrong. Okay. Yeah, I think it's, yeah, it makes it cool, you know? And we need

Starting point is 01:46:39 things that I think have moral value and integrity to be cool like like I watch anime cuz they have more moralistic value then regular movies, yeah So I watch a lot of anime. I don't watch a lot of it Israel A lot of Sonia watches a lot of it, you know, he is UFC fighter the last time Incredible day the last time been but yeah you and him with you and him would be such a neat I mean you guys are I mean both humans or whatever. I'm gonna talk about I'm trying to give me the answer. We want to talk about you have a new tour coming up

Starting point is 01:47:13 Yeah, new tour coming out. I got coffee. You had a new album that came out on my birthday I think March 19th or something. Yeah, I wouldn't come out. I'm here. No, I'm here. I'm here too Yeah, I'm trying to think, is there anything else that you wanted to talk about today? If anybody watched this and they gained any insight, I'm grateful for that. If you didn't gain any insight, I could give a fuck less. Hang on.

Starting point is 01:47:43 That's fair. That's it, that's all. That's it, that's all. Whenever I drop an album, I'm like, get it. If you want to get it, if you don't, don't get it. Like, I'm not here to force you. If you want to get it, if you don't want to get it, don't get it. It's already going to do what it's going to do. Yeah. I didn't do. I can say this. This album that I put out, this last one, I was proud of it. Usually I'm upset when a project come out, I'm like, I wasn't happy at this and this and that whenever it released, but this time I was like, I celebrated myself the whole way through, and I was like, man, I love this project. Like, out of my other projects,

Starting point is 01:48:23 I go back and appreciate them after the next one come out. But now this one, I'm like, nah, I fuck with this one all the way through. Why do you think that was? Because I'm in a different space. Like I don't make depression music anymore. And then if I do make depression music, I'm just venting.

Starting point is 01:48:40 It's my therapeutic release. I got it all out. I know there's somebody out there that could relate to what I'm going through But this is how we combat that as onward and upward. Hmm. That's it. That's all I don't stay stuck in the sunken place No, yeah, I don't stay stuck in that. I don't stay stuck. I don't stay stuck in a sunken place I don't stay stuck in the sunken place. Amen. I'm a snap out of it quick That's it. Nothing changes if nothing changes, they say.

Starting point is 01:49:06 Nothing changes if nothing changes, yes sir. Kevin Gates, man, the proud of Louisiana. Thank you so much, man, for spending time with me today, man, it's a blessing, I really appreciate it. Thank you for having me, and I just want to tell you this sincerely, I mean it sincerely, thank you for being you. This was like the most different type of interview,

Starting point is 01:49:25 podcast, whatever you want to call it. It was just like, we was just talking shit. But it was beautiful because not too many people could see me, like really see me. And I just appreciate you for that. Usually when I go places I have to meet the person at the level of the person. I had to see where they at and just, but with this it was like the transparency was beautiful.

Starting point is 01:49:50 It was refreshing talking to you like I lost track of time. If you ever watch when I go other places I have to meet the person at the level they at and I hate what I'm about to say but it's the truth. I look at my watch to keep time. I didn't do that one time there, because it was refreshing. It was refreshing. Well, I appreciate you sharing yourself with the world, sharing what's going on in your head and your spirit with the world, man.

Starting point is 01:50:13 It's been, some of the things you say make me think, and I appreciate that, because I think me having taken time to think is more important than I knew it needed to be for myself. Yeah. So thank you very much, Mr. Gates. Thank you for having me. Oh, but when I reach that ground I'll share this peace of mind I found I can feel it in my bones

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This Past Weekend - #593 - Kevin Gates

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