This Past Weekend - #652 - Matt McCusker

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Starting point is 00:01:00 That's the only type we're selling anymore is my favorite type. All that and more available at Theo Vaughn's Store.com. I hope everyone is having a good day, and thank you for your support. Today's guest is a stand-up comedian. He's one half of the Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast. He's the shaman. He is. He's on a higher frequency.

Starting point is 00:01:25 He operates in a special realm. and he's on the road soon. So if you get a chance, I recommend that you go see him. It's just, if you even get to spend time with this guy, it's a smart choice. I'm thankful to be able to do that today.

Starting point is 00:01:40 My guest is Mr. Matt McCusker. Beautiful. Yeah. You got those crap out of my pockets. Oh, dude, that's one thing. Well, how much shit do guys start? And I'm a guy. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:02:14 And it's like the shit, we start to have in our pockets. Look at that. You have glass around the neck. I... The phone. Phone wallet keys. I need an upper.

Starting point is 00:02:25 I need a downer. You need the little naked teeth. You got BC powders. You're fucking... We need pocketbooks, dude. Some guys have already adopted pocketbook technology. We need... What do you mean?

Starting point is 00:02:35 We need a pocketbook. Guys, the purse, whatever. Pocket book. Oh, that thing. Yeah, yep, yep. That fanny pack that people wear around their heart or whatever? Yeah. They're satchel.

Starting point is 00:02:45 That's a weird. when the fanny pack on the heart, that guy's always like, what's going on here? I think you have to like, if you're going to have one, you have to have a gun in there just so you can maintain, you know what I mean? But one of those little guns or whatever? Yeah, I think a tiny like James Bond, like a little 38, little snub. Ah, that'd be nice thing. Good to see you, dude. Yeah, pleasure to see you, man.

Starting point is 00:03:09 Yeah, congrats on everything, bro. Thank you, man. Yeah, you guys' podcast is crushing it. And you're on tour right now, too. Yeah. Yep, yep. Yeah, I got to, where am I going? I'm going to, uh, I know, I know I have Phoenix.

Starting point is 00:03:21 Phoenix is haunting me. I don't know what's up with the city of Phoenix. I got to do the celebrity theater, so it's like the little one in the round. Yeah, I hope that's full. Otherwise, we're going to have like a semi-circle. It's going to be, that'd be pretty bad. I couldn't do the ramp. I could only do like 270 degrees.

Starting point is 00:03:38 Just a you. So yeah, I get there with Phoenix and, yeah. Go support that one, guys, in Phoenix. Yeah, man. And they're everywhere else. But yeah, man, I've been good, man. It's chilling. Yeah, pull up Matt's Dachian, just so we have them, please.

Starting point is 00:03:48 Yes, thank you. Oh, there we go. St. Paul, there we go. Yeah, where are you at in this thing right now? I'm towards the end. I'm at the bottom half or the bottom, like, quarter here. Okay, St. Paul, Indianapolis. Yep, I got Des Moines.

Starting point is 00:04:02 Yeah, St. Paul, Des Moines, Phoenix, Tucson, Toronto, and Chicago. Oh, yeah, you got Des Moines. You got Des Moines, obviously, a black guy. Des Moines. Let's just say that, dude. True. But there's not a lot of them there because you expect to see them when you get there. Des Moines, I think he invented jelly.

Starting point is 00:04:20 One guy did peanut butter. Yeah, Des Moines. Please. Phoenix. Tucson, bro. Tucson's huge. Great place to get some coral. What's that blue core?

Starting point is 00:04:33 That rock. It's a lot of older women wear the silver and the what? Coral. Is it good for like a magnetic bracelet you're talking about? Yeah, there's a lot of people. A lot of people, a lot of copper. in opal or whatever. Okay.

Starting point is 00:04:48 What's a blue stone? Yeah, it's a lot of that shit out there. A lot of people missing arms. Oh, okay. It's like the mystical end of Arizona. There's like the guys with their pants up to here, Marizondians, and there's like, yeah, I got you. It's Shaman country.

Starting point is 00:05:01 Do you think those would be your vibes over there? Yeah, I've never been to Tucson yet. Phoenix, I'm telling you. I like Phoenix. It's just, I don't know why. It's always, there's always cities I have that tickets go great. There's other cities where they're like a slog. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:05:13 Phoenix tradition, just like historically has been. log. It's okay. I just accept it. It is what it is. That's just Phoenix. That's my Phoenix experience. Yeah. So. Dang, dude. Yeah. I think for some like that from here, like Minneapolis, Puerto Rico. Puerto Rico. I noticed. Really? Yeah. I'm like PR. That kind of surprises me honest. I feel like you would rock the PR ticket market. Yeah. Yeah, that's kind of, me too. The boletas. Um, yeah, dude, great to see you. bro. What's cracking? What's new right now in your world, man? Dude, the only thing I can even, it's boring, but it's just gardening. I've been gardening.

Starting point is 00:05:52 I've been gardening nonstop. I got ahead of it this year. Last year, I planned it when it was already too hot. Everything got scorched. So, yeah, I got some blackberries and raspberries I'm waiting on. So, really? Yeah, I've been a big, I've been big on that, man, trying to grow stuff. I got garlic coming, so. So blackberries and garlic, and this is all in your own y'all? Oh, shoot. That's my garden, yeah. That's, it's been revamped. The hailstorm destroyed my blueberry bushes. Yeah, it's in my life, like a little backyard. But you're making the most out of it. Now, can you feed your family here, man? No, dude, it's so sad.

Starting point is 00:06:21 So that's a blueberry bush. It got destroyed in the hail storm. That one's coming back to life as well. And is there any reward from the, like it? Doesn't your government subsidize this kind of shit or whatever? I should get them. I should get some sort of subsidy. But there, we had a blueberry bush, and we had,

Starting point is 00:06:34 it produced one, literally one blueberry. The first time I did it, and me and my whole family cut it into force. We each had a fourth of blueberry. We would be dead if I actually had to farm. we would all be dead. I've gotten like five radishes, one blueberry. And raspberries were flowing, man. And then just the hailstorm wiped,

Starting point is 00:06:52 just completely wiped me out. And was there stuff you could have done in advance to prepare for that? Because, I mean, and do the, does it feel like the plants look to you for, like, the leadership, or you don't feel that at all? I am. Because I've never had a garden yet.

Starting point is 00:07:03 Yeah, so here's the thing. You can be like that. There's a lot of doting mother-type gardeners. I'm a stern father. If you can't pull your own, you die. I need producers. I know people who are going to adapt to the element. Like I'm not gonna baby any of these plants like Stalin yeah completely it's a completely totalitarian system my wife's like well bring that one in I'm like if I can't handle the sun is dead

Starting point is 00:07:22 Yeah I'll get someone who can handle the son I'm not out here baby in these plants where I got I have kids I'm not worried about a plant Yeah I got to say her cry about a beanstalk is dead pull it out yeah throw in the compost next so I run a ruthless guard it's completely ruthless I had a rat that just died Did you fuck him I dude he was that's the thing with gardening it does kind of connects you to like a real life or death thing because it's like I don't want to kill, I don't want to kill an animal, but then it starts eating like, you know, starts just munching all your leafy greens and you're like, not about to grow food for a rat. That's bullshit. So then like I had a guy come out and the guy gave, it was like an exterminator. And this stuff he gave it. He's like, dude, this stuff's the real deal. Don't let your dogs get it.

Starting point is 00:08:04 Because my dog had eaten rat poison once. No problem. Survived. And I was like, yeah, he'll be all right. He's like, no, this shit is like fiberglass in it. So when the rat eats the poison, the fiberglass cuts. cuts his lungs and he starts like drowning in his own blood. Who created this?

Starting point is 00:08:16 Is that in Yahoo? I think so. That's the same stuff they were putting in the Palestinians food that they were giving them. Which is fucking heartbreaking. That's a fair point. And why are they trying to kill them so hard? Dude, well, they just like,

Starting point is 00:08:34 that's their job, man. They're like, because if they half step in, you still have rats, you're going to call them all pissed off. So like the poison messes them up. but the fiberglass or whatever really make sure they die no matter what. And also rats won't die around the colony. They'll, like a dog, they'll run off and find solitude and die.

Starting point is 00:08:53 And we got rid of this chair recently. So it was like hogging up a space in our backyard. And we lifted it up, there was a dead rat, one of the dead rats back there. They'd been laying there so long. I picked it up. Dude, its face was gone. It like really like kind of fucked me up. Like it was yesterday.

Starting point is 00:09:09 I picked it up. I had like, you know, two sticks put together. And I was like, is this thing? been sitting for all. Let me peep its face to just avoid where its face was just like things ate its face. Yeah. Just a hole for where its face was. And I was like, damn, it was fucked me up. Fuck, you're living in a damn saw episode over there. Dude, gardening is crazy. Where are you gardening at? Just my backyard. Transylvania, dude. It just sounds insane, bro. Gardening is crazy, though, because you get like, you have little spider allies. I see my spider, my orb weavers in my garden.

Starting point is 00:09:38 I kind of, they're like, they're on my team. We're fighting the bugs. The rats. I'm trying to fight the rats. We got them, I think, under control. How did you know that you were having issues with the rats? I'd see them right in my face, just munching my, I'd like open the door and they'd just be munching my shit. Oh, yeah, we'd all see. I'd be like, what the fuck? They are kind of cute, though. They're called cotton rats.

Starting point is 00:10:00 So they're these big guys and they have these like, they have these really furry coats. I kind of like them. But then they started shitting in my grill and I was like, we're done. Yeah, they honestly, I would have tolerated them, but they completely overpush. overstep their boundaries. There we go. Dude, there he is. That's the exact guy.

Starting point is 00:10:16 Imagine one of those guys, no face, hole for a face. Zoom in on him. Look at that little guy. A little fat little hairy guy. Look at that little gerbils almost. Yeah, it's that little flaw bear.

Starting point is 00:10:27 Yeah. He's munching on somebody's fucking herbs right now. One of God's little macnuggets. They're little thing. Yeah, they are. They're thick, huh? They're thick as hell.

Starting point is 00:10:36 They had a burrow underneath my little porch in the back of my garden. And also people were like, oh, just dumb cayenne pepper. all this, dude, I dumped like, I got like four pounds of red pepper flakes, just lace the whole garden. Dude, that guy was just sitting in a bed of it. I'm like, man, get out of here with this bullshit.

Starting point is 00:10:52 Give me the fiberglass poison. There's always all those tricks, dude. Like if you, uh, if you'll siphon some piss out of a senior citizen or something and put it out there. Yeah, rub a baby's ass on the fucking stair rails or whatever. Nobody will fall down it. Yeah, nobody will get hurt. It doesn't work. It doesn't work.

Starting point is 00:11:07 The exterminators come. Not even the Home Depot. And I don't want to, you know, mess up Home Depot. No, let's talk about them. They're not. Dude, that shit, none of that stuff works. You need a professional exterminator, and they have, like, like, Dr. Evil weapons.

Starting point is 00:11:19 That's the only thing that gets him. Well, did you get one of those guys who comes, and he's tatted? And he's, like, has all his, like, AA years of recovery fucking medallions around his neck, and he's fucking... Ideally, that's what you want. Yeah. But this guy's pretty chill. He's pretty clean, but he, uh, you can tell he's been around,

Starting point is 00:11:36 he's been around the stuff for a while. The other guy, I know, got bit by a rattlesnake. Literally got bit. He drove himself to the hospital. Fuck yeah. That's boss shit. Bro, it's crazy. I get nothing but love for exterminators.

Starting point is 00:11:47 Do you ever have a horrible infestation of any kind? Just these hoes. True. Basically. Sorry, I was just making a meme flip. Oh, he needs a strong hand for that. But no, I never had anything like that. You know, actually, you know what?

Starting point is 00:12:06 Bring up some of these exterminators first. I want to see some of these. Yeah, good call. Let's get a gander at some of these. America's top ten most extramators. Extreme exterminators, including women. There we go. A lot of these bitches will kill anything.

Starting point is 00:12:19 They go around. There we go. Look at that guy. Look at extreme. Yeah, look at that fucking guy right there. Sandblasting a fuck. Yeah, they're giving, this is, I need to see the real guys. This is the fucking, it's like the stock footage.

Starting point is 00:12:34 Yeah, it's all T-moose shit, man. Yeah. No, none of the exterminators look like these guys. These are male models. Yeah, I mean, there's Billy the exterminator. There's that guy. And he passed away. Did he really?

Starting point is 00:12:43 Yeah. Yeah. Dude, short shelf life on those guys. I mean, you're literally dealing in poison. You're out there to fucking spraying glyphosate on everything. You're out there fucking. Those bug bombs, what they do is they inhibit reproductive systems. So like, I had fleas and I had to do a bug bomb.

Starting point is 00:13:00 The Home Depot was bullshit. So I got the real guy who came out. And when I did the first one, I lit it all. You know, you pull the thing. And it's supposed to give you 10 seconds. It just exploded in my face. So I just got drenched in this shit and had to run outside. Did you get it at the 4th of July place?

Starting point is 00:13:12 Or where you get that bitch? Because they'll put those things in together, dude. Dude, they just, they can't reproduce. So it just like scorches bug genitals. And then they just just sit, have to watch like the apocalypse. There's, there's a colony of them.

Starting point is 00:13:27 Is this Palantir online? Where are you? I just can't believe you're involved in all this, dude. And your children are what sleeping inside? Well, I came in from like, talking to the exterminator and I'm like, bro, this rat poison's crazy. I forgot my two daughters were there.

Starting point is 00:13:42 And I'm like, yeah, those little mice. and they like watch it play. And they always like, all the mouse is back. I'm like, what it does is it cuts their lungs and they drown in their own blood. My wife's like, chill, dude. I'm like, yeah, my bad. My bad.

Starting point is 00:13:52 My bad. Are you part of a group with the gardening or how? I'm lone wolf. I have thought about joining a group. But I'm like, when you ever do something like that, it's just too much human interaction for me. I just, I like to figure it out by myself. Maybe one mentor would be good.

Starting point is 00:14:09 A whole group, there's bound to be someone I don't like. Yeah. I'm going to be battling. I'm like, no, thank you. Some guy trying to get you to buy his soil or some other thing. Something like that. Or just a run-of-the-mill know it all. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:14:21 Any group of just adults together, there's going to be at least one, if not two, like, unbearable guys usually. Like, you ever do you ever do like adult education? There's always one person who's going to raise your hand, talk for 10 minutes every time. It's just like, bro, shut up, man. Or when you go to like that DUI course, some guy who's like, you know, like he's never going to drink and drive again, dude. First of all, what a God's rules is nobody gets just one DWI.

Starting point is 00:14:48 I know, I know. Everyone needs to get one. My friend, it was funny, it was a couple years ago, but he had one. I think he was the last one to get one, but his brother had one and his dad had one. And they're all at like family Christmas party with extended family. And he like, they're all drinking beer and he like cheers them. Like, hey, we all have DUIs guys. And I think his dad was trying to keep his underwhips.

Starting point is 00:15:10 He was like, shut the fuck up. You did a DUI's cheers, and, you know, I thought he would go over better. Dude, there's nothing sadder than a dad getting a DUI on his way or him from working. He's been drinking or whatever. They get him, man. I know a lot of guys who just quietly, you get them, and you're like, all right, all right, you got me. Dude, they drive dry. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:15:30 Oh, my stepdad got one. My dad would be drunk. He would park his car just like wherever it kind of stopped, like by our gate or whatever. So my mom would fucking be. out there yelling at this 77-year-old man who's just fucking unconscious in a white fucking LTT that he was not even at a certain point, dude,

Starting point is 00:15:49 he wasn't strong enough to get the door back open once he got in. So sometimes he'd get in there and he'd get him from work and we didn't know. We'd be inside of him fucking slumped. Leave him out there all night. Yeah. Crazy, dude.

Starting point is 00:16:02 Well, dude, that's the thing. They were allowed to drink and drive. Like, drinking and driving was like, like, my dad is almost 70 and like, when they were in high school, cops would be hammered driving a car and they'd be like, come on, man, get the hell. Take your beer and be like, get out here.

Starting point is 00:16:15 Yeah. You didn't get in trouble for it. So all of a sudden, now it's criminalized. Fucking woke bullshit. It's a good point. It's pretty bad. It's very dangerous. There we go.

Starting point is 00:16:25 Who's this guy? That's a exterminator. And if he has a church behind it, he means it. Who is he? It's AI? Well, I think if you just go to YouTube, say you put in like Tucson, extreme exterminator. If you go to some of those,

Starting point is 00:16:38 place and just look for some, try to make it by city or whatever you have to do to see if you can come up with some. Yeah, let's get some organic. Yeah, it'd be nice if by the end, we had some. Damn, exterminators are really, they keep, we keep themselves hidden. Well, I think, first of all, I wonder if that's a dying game. I don't know. I don't think so, man, because it's like, is it running the family?

Starting point is 00:16:56 Because a lot of times you'd be like, you know, my dad was a fireman, I'm a fireman. And then the third kid is like, I'm not, I'm just fat or whatever. Yeah, true. Yeah, no, that's. But there's always that lineage, you know, like, I love hot dogs. My dad loved hot dogs. dog. Yeah. My son loves hot dogs and then you have like breaks. Gay son. Yeah, like, who really likes hot dogs. Yeah. Dude, I think it's just like one of those, it's just one of those

Starting point is 00:17:20 gigs. I think it's just like a get out of jail gig and, you know, you do it. Especially if you like do it for yourself. That's a lot of them. It's just like it's a business you can get into. It's like cleaning. You can run a, you can start a cleaning company pretty easily. It's very low overhead. A lot of strippers do it. Yeah. That's actually a great, yeah. It's a great move. And it's their gate, it's like a re-entry program into, I've hung out with a lot of strippers, and me even made out in their cars sometimes. That's awesome. And you'll have like a mop handle coming across your shoulder and shit.

Starting point is 00:17:47 You know, they're on the Ascension. Oh, yeah. You see that, you know, this is actually a good sign. This lady's got her act together. You hop in, there's a nine-month-old in a car seat. You're like, bad sign. This lady needs a mop. He's sleeping on a pack of a Swiffer replacement covers.

Starting point is 00:18:02 I tried my hand at stripper dating. It wasn't, you know, I had nothing against them. I just wasn't cut out for it. It was a little too rough and tumble for me. You have to be a boss. You have to also work late hours. To be a stripper's boyfriend, you are working, they work in late hours. You have to be up when they get home.

Starting point is 00:18:17 Dude, my sister had a friend that was a stripper, right? Yes. And she would come over to our house and shit. And her and my sister always fighting and stuff. And then she stole her a vacuum one time, right? Trying to break into the industry. Valissa, that was her name. Belissa, which isn't even a name.

Starting point is 00:18:32 Felissa. Like, what name is it? Valissa. That is a crazy name. Yeah, it's crazy, dude. And so many, she stole her vacuum. Dude, two years later, I met like one of these real fancy parties where they have a woman pop out of the cake or whatever. Like, you know, the thing you kind of see it to me, like, they actually had a girl pop out of the cake.

Starting point is 00:18:55 They had two cakes and two girls pop out of them. And, like, it was a big birthday for this guy. And they were strippers, right? And one of them was the woman. Whoa. It was Verissa who had stolen our vacuum, dude. And so guys are tipping her and shit, and I'm just fucking like...

Starting point is 00:19:12 Waiting. I'm just in the bag, just like... Just making vacuum sounds and shit and fucking locking on her. That's fucked up to take someone's vacuum, too. That could really throw a household under quick. And me and my sister were on our last limb as neighbors, dude. And we lived under this family that was like very heavy-boned.

Starting point is 00:19:30 Yeah. They're stomping. Yes. And they were beating each other. I think there was domestic abuse. Yikes. And I would call the police all the time on them. I've called the police.

Starting point is 00:19:39 I've always called the police a lot since I was, since I was a child. But yeah, I would call the police all the time. And I'd be like, he has a gun. That's what I would say every time. That's good. They get right there. They're right there. If you're like, hey, he's beating this woman.

Starting point is 00:19:51 One of his kids, he fucking tied his kid to a tree outside or whatever. Yeah. He just put a bunch of crow food on his kids' shoulders and tied him to a tree outside. Never. They don't get, yeah, they're not going to shoot. Gun is, that's the code. That's the. Fast pass. Because they want the action, dude.

Starting point is 00:20:07 They do. They love it. And, well, they get, like, cred. If a cop takes a gun off the street, that's something they get, like, accolades for. Bringing a guy's, like, just socked his wife in the stomach. No, but your sergeant doesn't, like, pat you on the back. If you get a gun, that's like a cop, like Pac-Man pellet, that, like, takes you further in your journey. Yeah. That's a bad.

Starting point is 00:20:24 That's, like, literally a metric for cops. How many guns you get and all that stuff? Were you almost on the force ever? No, my wife was on the cop. So I got to, like, observe secondhand. I thought so hard about becoming a cop, but I could, I wasn't able to do it. That's right. Your wife was a cop, huh?

Starting point is 00:20:39 Yeah, I was selling weed, so I couldn't become a cop. But you guys met, dude? We met before, yeah, we go before that. But she was a cop when you met her? No, she wasn't a cop. She just surprised me one day. I was like, I think I'm going to become a police officer. And I was like, she was a cop now?

Starting point is 00:20:52 No, no. She did it for like five years. Was she ever a cop? She was for five years in Philadelphia. Okay. That's being a cop, dude. Yeah, dude. She was on like a little foot, she was on foot patrol and everything.

Starting point is 00:21:01 She was in, like, not the best area for sure in Philly. Like, North? No, she was in South, like, Grey's Ferryish. So it's like, it's pretty rough. A lot of areas there. Yeah. It was like gang. There were some gangs there for sure.

Starting point is 00:21:13 It was like an old Irish neighborhood of like pretty, I would say, pretty hardcore white trash. And then it was like black gangs. You know, it's a brutal. It's not a good mix. But the, so yeah. And do you got to, cops got to watch, like, videos, too, of like all the bad stuff that happened. You get an email of like a 14-year-old got shot up in a deli. last night. It's just lively. It's like the video.

Starting point is 00:21:34 It's like, I don't know, why do they make them watch that stuff? Dude, well, Twitter makes us all watch all that. Yeah, true. Dude, I'm not a cop. That's what I'm going to start fucking replying to some of these Twitter feeds. And this is the authorities. I'll wake up in the middle of the night for some reason turn my phone next day I've seen seven people getting massacred outside of something like, um, outside of like a car dealership and

Starting point is 00:21:54 outside of Tijuana or something. What? Yeah. What portal of hell did I just take myself to? Dude, X is crazy now. I remember. like, I remember when it was Twitter, it was like, there's too much censorship. And I'm like, yeah, dude, like, let me see the real shit. Now I'm kind of like, let's go. Let's censor this heavily again. My, my, I can't even go on X anymore. It's my, I get all like race baiting kind of like race war propaganda where it's like, can you believe the it's just nonstop. Huh. You know, you can know, you watch it. And you're like, you get the race war propaganda. Yeah, dude. I get like lots of like, uh, I get a lot of like white supremacy stuff. Yeah, I swear to God. I don't even like, I don't like or share. You know you have a black wife. They want me, man. They want me, man. They're trying to break me out of that.

Starting point is 00:22:35 But it's just like, yeah, it's, it's rough. I'll be like watching trying to scroll next to my wife and it'll be like a guy screams the N-word. I'm like, oh, who? What was that? I'm like, some fucking video. Going back to Instagram. It's just a guy screamed to M-word again.

Starting point is 00:22:47 I'm like, oh, shit. My ex-feeds is just completely bonkers. Dude, Elon should do better than that. He should want better than that for society, I feel like. Yeah. You know, I think there's a lot of smud. It's just trash. It feels like trash.

Starting point is 00:23:01 honestly. Yeah. I think there was a spot where it felt like, I mean, I guess there's still some good video and stuff on there. You'll see, like, I'll see like some good political stuff on there.

Starting point is 00:23:13 But I do feel like outside of that, it's losing, I feel like it's kind of starting to lose its vibe. I think so. It's, then you read the news. It's like this now valued at $90 trillion.

Starting point is 00:23:26 And like, how? Why is this worth so much money? I don't know. Maybe, maybe, You know, if you do flood it with porn and, like, violence, it does make a bazillion dollars. So, good business-wise, you might be crushing it.

Starting point is 00:23:36 But I, it's too, I had a, I've stepped off of X. Yeah. I can't. I just can't watch it. It's too much. It's too much. Yeah. I'm trying to go to bed.

Starting point is 00:23:44 I'm trying to drown myself to sleep. I'm trying to have a decent life. Fucking killing animals in my backyard. Only what necessary. Yeah. What is funny, too. Like, yeah, you're like trying to, like, you know, I want to live in a safe neighborhood. Then you're just watching, just people being shot in the face.

Starting point is 00:24:00 like, why am I doing this? Am I safe house? This is crazy. Dude, it's, we're at a point for sure. One of the biggest things I'm noticing, or for myself that I notice,

Starting point is 00:24:07 we're at a point with the fuck am I talking about. That's insane. We might be at a point. Let's see. Where like, I have to control what comes into me, man. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:24:20 And if I don't, then that's my fucking fault. Yeah, it's true. You know? Now, the algorithm, the people that make the algorithms

Starting point is 00:24:26 should be able to be held liable if, like, someone goes and does a crime based on like them feeding them like the same type of bullshit like somebody goes and shoots out of place because they got indoctrinated into some really strong and uh like sadistic beliefs or something because the algorithm fed them that i think that those people should be held liable yeah man or it's tough case by case is tough because it's like well how do you is it like in court

Starting point is 00:24:51 obviously like the moral thing yeah but like a lawyer they'll like facebook's lawyers will just shred that be like oh he's watching that and this and that they'll get out of that but i agree it's like i think Didn't they just rule against Facebook now being like, yeah, what was that? I think a thing came against them being like, yo, you guys, kind of like they did with cigarettes, where they're like,

Starting point is 00:25:07 yeah, dude, this shit's bad, you knew it was bad, you gave it to people, now you got a fork. Here you go right here. A jury has ordered meta and Google to pay $3 million to a 20-year-old woman who alleged

Starting point is 00:25:18 that she became addicted to Instagram and YouTube as a child. Fucking damn. Shit, all right, everyone else get on that train. Jurors found the company's liable for product design features that harmed her mental health, the plaintiff,

Starting point is 00:25:29 Kali G. testified that the apps replaced her hobbies and contributed to anxiety, depression, and body dysmorphia. Yeah. Bro, they have about two billion lawsuits coming about the same. Like, that's... It says it right here. The case is the first of thousands targeting big tech over addiction to reach trial

Starting point is 00:25:45 of bellwether to assess how other claims could be resolved. Well, this is apparently, from what I heard, like, long ago is a lot of these social media companies had people who designed slot machines, consult with them to, like, how to make their basically interface as addictive as possible. You know when you like pull down and refresh and like your phone kind of like shakes a little bit, there's that little noise? That's like slot machine technology somehow. Like it's designed to like, you get a little dopamine burst when it goes like,

Starting point is 00:26:11 bump and you're like, ooh, yeah, new stuff. And it's like, apparently it's set up like that where it's like, it's purposely designed to be maximally addictive. And they did that on purpose. Shit. Yeah. And it's like, it's like cigarettes. They're like, ah, this is bad for you.

Starting point is 00:26:25 You know, now they're going to have to pay out. They already have billions and billions of dollars. They're going to have to just fork some of the billions. Yeah. Yeah. It's worth it to them. Yeah. To continue to do it.

Starting point is 00:26:35 But do, remember the old school dopamine burst? You'd see a bald eagle fly by? That was the dopamine burst. Yeah, remember those days. Or even if it wasn't and somebody just said it was. True.

Starting point is 00:26:46 Yeah. You couldn't fucking see when you're a kid. You're just staring up into the sky to fucking pointing. Dude, I do remember being younger before the internet and just like, like, it's like summer. And I would just be like sitting outside. and just like, I would just be able to kind of like stare off for a while and just like,

Starting point is 00:26:59 be like, this is nice. And I, it's like, I can't even like take a shit now. If I don't have my phone, I'm like, I need to need to be scrolling. Yeah, when was the last time that we've daydreamed, you know? I know. It's tough. You really do. I have to like, on a plane, I can try to like force myself.

Starting point is 00:27:12 But then the whole time, I'm like, I can't believe I'm out of my phone. I'm so cool right now. I don't even daydream. I just like pat myself on the back for not looking at my phone. Yeah. And then I go, you know what? I'm going to look at my phone. Everyone's looking at the phone.

Starting point is 00:27:26 to think that someone could be in a restaurant by themselves. Like 40 years ago, you could do that. You could be in a restaurant by yourself sitting at a table and you wouldn't look insane. That's true. Now, without a phone. Now, if you see someone in a restaurant by themselves just sitting there, waiting for some people who are probably doing Coke to bring them their food, dude, There's fucking no.

Starting point is 00:27:57 Dude, I do this. When I go out, when I, like, I'm in a different city, I'll go out to dinner by myself, and I'll pride myself, and I'll sit there and just, like, waiting for some congratulations. It never comes. I just stare straight.

Starting point is 00:28:08 Like, you literally don't know what to do with yourself. Because it is that problem. You're like, I can't stare straight ahead. I'll try to look, like, kind of almost like I'm dreamily, like, yeah. Oh, and it's just nothing there. Or I'll rearrange a software again, do that shit. Play the shell game with, like,

Starting point is 00:28:24 fork knife napkin, fork knife napkin. Go to the bathroom really slow. Oh, look at that. Chick-fil-A is offering free ice cream to families who agree to put their phones away during their meal. Bro.

Starting point is 00:28:37 As part of an effort to encourage more face-to-face time and less screen use at the table. What are the exact rules with that? Who's enforcing? And, dude, imagine if you cost your family, the Chick-fil-A family meal just from one glance. That's tough.

Starting point is 00:28:53 You would get in serious trouble. You glanced out of your phone just to see the bears didn't get it done again. You fucking cough. Just a retarded guy blows a whistle at you. They should have a dude Chuck Filet is his name. It's just a black dude in there. He's a straight chicken cop in there. That would be a good job.

Starting point is 00:29:13 He's like, boom, got you. Fork, $38. Let's go. Chuck Filet. Chuck strikes again. Yeah, that's a shit, man. That's nice. Chick-fil-A, it's, you know...

Starting point is 00:29:26 I like that. I do, too. I like that. If they're not on their phone, let me see. The promotion is only offered at select Chick-Fleigh locations by individual operators,

Starting point is 00:29:34 not a company-wide program. 2016. It originated in 2016 from a Georgia operator and has been revived locally at various times. I like that, though. I do, too. Yeah, dude,

Starting point is 00:29:44 it was just, like, or just driving and thinking about shit? Yeah, I know. Dude, your mind had so much time to, like, I think that's one reason. even more creative because our mind was able to just fucking create. It was able to like,

Starting point is 00:29:59 the RAM wasn't always, you know, your computer sends you that thing. It's like, your RAM is almost done. You don't even know what your RAM is. You're like, fuck,

Starting point is 00:30:05 I better empty the RAM track. You gotta clean this out. I need a defragment. I still don't know what that is. Yeah, no, dude, it's really, it's like,

Starting point is 00:30:13 you know, because you have sleep, your brain gets to rest, but that, like, downtime, your brain does do stuff. Like, it, like,

Starting point is 00:30:19 kind of organizes things when you just kind of chill out. Because that's, I, like, when you, so when you're on your phone, you know when you read something on your phone? You're like, you don't remember any of it. Because as you're reading, when you're on your phone, every button and thing you're moving is like, it's a problem solving part of your brain.

Starting point is 00:30:35 So like you're trying to like, you know, you want your memory to be active. So you're like reading like information's coming. You have so much coming at you. Like you're the part of your memory that can store information along to the short term is like a tiny little bucket in your brain. So it only fits so much when you're like hitting buttons and going up and down, this and that. it just gets just, it's like splashing a ton of water in a tiny bucket. Just everything spills out.

Starting point is 00:30:56 I never remember anything. I research stuff on my phone all the time. And then I go like, that'll be like, like, how many carbs you need to be in keto? I'll read a whole article on it. And like a day later, I'll be like going to tell someone about it. And I'm like, I don't know. You need like only a little. I can never retain anything.

Starting point is 00:31:12 Well, dude, if somebody wants to tell me something these days, I'm like, dude, I can look at information. And we all have it now. I know. Like somebody, you. used to have the information. Like, you had to go down the street. You had to get molested by a guy. Yeah. That's a price you paid. Just to figure out how to like, you know, grow bougainvilias in your backyard. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. No, it's, it's true. Now I can just take a picture of a plant. It's like, this is the plant you're growing? I do it all the time. And it'll be like,

Starting point is 00:31:40 is this good? When can I harvest this? Blah, blah, blah. Yeah. It's actually, I do kind of like that. But you'll just take a picture and you'll do what? Put it in a like perplexity or something? Yeah. Yeah, like, grok and be like, when can I pull this garlic? But it's, but it's, It's not sure fire. It'll give you like, Have you eaten pussy today? It's going to just show you some fucking poker. No, check this out.

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Starting point is 00:34:25 Tocovas.com slash Theo. See site for details. Tocovas point your toes west. I personally am not worried about AI. Like people like it's going to end the world. It's like, I don't, I don't worry. I don't think it is, honestly. And if it, the thing is like, if it does, what are you really going to do? Right. All these, a lot of people are doing this like, I'm just not using it because it's like, I just feel like it's such a weird, it's like it's a computer. Like it's not,

Starting point is 00:34:53 you can destroy a computer easily. You say, wait, but it'll like self build itself so you can. It's like, dude, it's just nerds freaking out. It's not,

Starting point is 00:35:01 I don't think it's a real threat whatsoever. You know, I started to think it's definitely could be like the, uh, Y2K thing. Remember that? Yes. Yeah,

Starting point is 00:35:08 yeah, yeah. I remember that. Everybody was like forcing their like cousins to admit they were fash or whatever because God wasn't going to want them after midnighter. any like all that shit you know or it was like don't say you're a fash before midnight yeah you know or god won't let you in or whatever there was like all that kind of like those email chains or send this to 10 people that aren't fash you get those type of email chain like what is this shit dude

Starting point is 00:35:32 yeah because they were trying to catch fash whatever i think bush senior was doing that but um anyway that was crazy bro everybody thought y2k was gonna end it and then people thought the dot com boom And people bought, like, remember a guy bought like shoes.com? And then he sold her for like $270 million. And we were all buying different dot coms. Yeah, yeah. People were making up crazy dot com names. I tried to get a couple.

Starting point is 00:35:58 Did you? Yeah, I didn't get anything good, honestly. I don't, I don't remember. I think I sold them off right away or just, they're probably just dead. They expire to if you don't keep refreshing them. Yeah, I didn't have anything good. I watched the soft white underbelly. This has been cracking me out for like a month.

Starting point is 00:36:12 There was a guy who, it was similar to that lawsuit. He was going on being like, like, I had too much internet at a young age, and it had a bad effect on me. And he was, like, going out and compulsively doing, like, gay acts. But he was like, I'm not gay. I just got, like, you know, it was the internet. And the thing that got him into it was gay.com, which just made me laugh so hard. Just as a young kid, it's hitting gay.com. Your whole life just over.

Starting point is 00:36:35 Everything changes from gay.com. Hey, bud. Getting caught in fifth grade on gay.com. I would have been done, dude. Two older brothers catching gay.com. I was fried. Oh, that would have been crazy, huh? Are you going up to your room?

Starting point is 00:36:48 You're going to get on gay.com? Gay. That's a billion dollar hashtag, not hashtag, hyperlink, whatever people got. Gay.com. That's still worth money. For sure. Gay.com to send it to your buddy. Dude, hilarious.

Starting point is 00:37:04 You can change the hyperlink. You can do this way you can do that. Oh, man. Dude, buff homos.com was one of my favorite ones. Ari Manis is a comedian. and he started a website called buffhomos.com. Did he really? Yeah, see if it's still active or not.

Starting point is 00:37:18 I bet he pays. Buffhomos.com is great. What's he doing with it? He didn't want to... Oh, it just goes to his website. Which I think he should change that. Maybe not actually. All he'd have to do is, if he put, like, one good buff gay guy...

Starting point is 00:37:38 Well, he was doing it in his fucking management told him not to do it. He couldn't curate buff. homos? Yeah, they're like, you know, it's just kind of like, that's why nobody should have a fucking manager. Yeah, that's a billion-dollar idea. Yeah. That's crazy.

Starting point is 00:37:53 If you're not a fucking pussy. So his managers had to sit him down and be like, about buffhamos.com. Yeah. But then they told him to make that his landing page, basically. Yeah. A non-buff homo on there. And I love Ari. He's open for me a bunch over the years.

Starting point is 00:38:12 He's a great comedian. And he's a great dude. Clearly business genius, too. Buffhomos.com is so good. Bro, and he would send me the pictures of buff homos and stuff. And it was like, and it was like he would get his friends that owed him favors. He would give him stage time if they modeled for it. So that was the best part.

Starting point is 00:38:27 So you had like guys like Steve, Steve Fury, just different comedians who were like kind of door guys at the store. We were also growing good comedians like Craig Connett. And he would have him just modeling fucking like just regular dudes. But when you put him under the banner of Buff homos, It's crazy. You put a banner over something. You see a picture of a regular dude with this shit off. You're like, okay, maybe that guy is trying to get the military or whatever.

Starting point is 00:38:49 And then they write buff homo's above it. You're like, oh, this changes everything. I mean, okay, so his manager is probably worried about the fallout of being like, is it true that you tricked young comics into stage time for modeling for buffhombo's. First of all, I think some of them knew what was going on. True. For sure. They're all buddies.

Starting point is 00:39:10 But, yeah, that's a good lose. That's a good lose a bet kind of thing. Like you lose the bet. Playing poker for like buff homos of the week. I had a website called total creeper.com for a while. Did you really? Yeah, this was a long time ago. And I would just find total fucking creepers

Starting point is 00:39:24 and just take pictures every now. I didn't put them on that bitch, dude. I did those early websites on the internet. There was mullet.com. That was great. Yeah. Mollet.com was good. There was cameltoe.org.

Starting point is 00:39:37 People would just snap cameltoe shots. No way. That one was that, yeah, that one was a little. That's a little bit of innovation of privacy, obviously, but I remember as a young man being pumped. Yeah, what was a good one? Oh, there was like that, uh, is there a way to look at total, is there a way to find that in the like analogs of anything guys? Yeah, web archive might have it. No.

Starting point is 00:39:59 No, this wasn't my shit. That's Tumblr. That's a UK female. Yeah, that's Tumblr. Do you remember Tumblr? That shit was weird. Tumblr was crazy, dude. I never got into it personally, but I knew a girl who, like, was a big thing was curating a tumbler.

Starting point is 00:40:12 of just like lightly pornographic content. It was just like a sex tumbler. It was crazy. Oh, dude, there was like one like girls in panties getting out of cars or whatever. Fuck, dude.

Starting point is 00:40:24 Something about it, dude. But in panties, not like thong, not trashy fucking, you know. No, dude, we're rare that we can still, we're JPEG heads. We're one of the last who have beaten it to a still image. Oh.

Starting point is 00:40:38 You know what I mean? Like, not a lot of people can say that. Yeah. Dude, like, I remember the fucking, like, Cole, I used to come home from church on Sundays and grab the newspaper, pop out the Coles catalog, straight to the underwear section, locked the door in the bathroom. God. 45 minutes session. Dude, I used to rub some of the, like, I would rub like a thing. This is fucking crazy. I should never say this how much because I'll never have a wife at this, but I would rub like a picture of like if they had a model, like a underwear model.

Starting point is 00:41:06 I'd rub it under my arms because someone would kind of smell like poohy a little bit like that. jerk off too. You would stank it up. Yeah, yeah. I'll just kind of stank it up. Yeah, I don't think my mom got it. My mom,

Starting point is 00:41:20 that's actually really good. I don't think it's a good idea? To stank it up? Yeah. Yeah, I never even thought about that. Thanks, man. I got a lot ashamed of it.

Starting point is 00:41:27 I think that's actually pretty cool. Now, the problem is you're crossing wires because you're going to catch, like, you're going to be out working out one day, catch some of your own funk and be like, God damn. I'm better,

Starting point is 00:41:39 Come under there. Start fucking eating out your armpit. Oh, that's insane, dude. Sorry, that's the line. No worries out of buddy that did that. We catch him doing it at night. No. Sleepovers.

Starting point is 00:41:51 Really? Because he had like hair under his arm and he would kind of get his tongue around the corner of his boss of his pectoral. Ah, that's fucking weird. And get him a little nibble. Just fucking. Get your little nibble, Danny. Pretty impressive. You nibbling your arm pussy?

Starting point is 00:42:08 Huh, Ricky? Okay, this was, yeah, are there any still on here? Total creepers, sick. But yeah, people were supporting, people were sending this shit in. This was good shit. And the creepers in is awesome. My great aunt died, and there are two zombie jokers showed up to the burial and said they were friends of hers, but no one knew these two, what you think?

Starting point is 00:42:26 But that's total creepers, that's a really good one. It was good, dude. Damn, 2011. Lampman. This guy and I were at the same full-service car wash. He was yelling into his phone about a mortgage. What do you think? Yeah, I miss the imagination, bro.

Starting point is 00:42:46 Yeah. I miss, like, seeing a girl smile at you, like, on a Friday at school. Or give you some sign of, like, maybe she even just, like, asked you go throw some trash away forward. That would have been awesome. I would have loved to do that. Totally. And then you're thinking all week, and you'd be like, fuck, she's thinking about me. Yep.

Starting point is 00:43:04 I'm going to start working out. You start making, like, like, we would, like, chisel, like, weights out of, like, wood and shit. trying to like... Get pumps. Yeah. And we didn't know that it had to weigh a real amount. We were like,

Starting point is 00:43:14 oh, it just has to look like weights. And just dumb shit. But then Monday, you'd be like, oh, she fucking hates me again. But there was just that couple day period where there was no phone to see that she was having a blast

Starting point is 00:43:26 or that she was like, her family was rich or whatever, had a boat or whatever. You just laid it home in your fucking poor bed. Yep. Thinking... Just imagine her.

Starting point is 00:43:35 Yeah, it was actually... I genuinely, I know people say this all the time, but I do feel bad for like younger kids. Have you gotten into like the clavicular stuff? I see this guy. Like he did an interview with,

Starting point is 00:43:47 Andrew Callahan recently. I watched and I've watched a lot of his stuff, but there's like this world of guys that are like, you know, looks maxing is like you, your only hope in life is to become as attractive as possible. But now they're doing these things where like the injecting a bunch of peptides. These are like young, like, you know, early 20s. Go on TRT, you're hitting the peptides.

Starting point is 00:44:07 And, you know, the thing that gets like sensationalized is like, like you kind of tap your jawbone with a hammer. It's like it's called like bone hammering or whatever. So you like kind of do micro fracture. Dude, it's crazy. And I watched the interview. He said like, oh man,

Starting point is 00:44:19 like that's really nothing. But that's all like what you have bone smashing. Is a dangerous non-scientific social media trend. Primarily popular on TikTok and within looks maxing subcultures, subcultures that involves intentionally inflicting blunt force trauma on facial bones to alter their structure. Proponents falsely claim that repeatedly breaking and bruising bones with hammers, bottles or hard objects will cause them to heal.

Starting point is 00:44:39 a more chislet or masculine shit. If that's the case, everybody in Stockton would be fucking beautiful. Yeah, true. Yeah, true. Ever just been fucking hit in the face? Everybody has been fucking hit by bottles and shit. Yeah, well,

Starting point is 00:44:51 the thing is, it's like, you know, a lot of it's just internet stuff, but there is the underlying philosophy where it's like, you know, the dye has been cast for you.

Starting point is 00:44:59 And if you're not, like, you know, super attractive or like, as a, you know, it's like guys are kind of becoming girls now where it's like, I just got to be prettier.

Starting point is 00:45:07 It's like there's a, it's called the bonestrapes. structure hierarchy, where, like, the way your bone structure is, that kind of determines your whole fate as a person. And if you don't ascend, you'll become this, like, it's just like sad and very bleak and like this, like, I don't know, this like really nihilistic thing where it's just like, dude, you can just be a dude. You don't have to be like, I need to ascend. I need to ascend. I need to ascend so I can mug and blah, blah, blah. I just, I feel bad. I mean, I think a lot of kids at least joke about it. But I was watching an interview and I'm like,

Starting point is 00:45:33 man, this is like a really sad way to live. Being like my, my suburbal is not maximal. It's like, dude, you're a guy who cares. And what is mogging? That's not part of... Mogging? Yeah. Mogging is like... So you can be height-mogged. You can be frame-mogged.

Starting point is 00:45:49 If you're like someone's bigger than you and you stay... If they take a picture with you and they're looking bigger, you've been mocked. Okay. If they're taller than you, you've been height-mogged, you know? And there's like, you can go any dimension of like whatever you have. So, cock-mog, somebody could be cock-mogging you. Somebody could be... That's the worst mug.

Starting point is 00:46:04 If you get cock-mogged, dude, that's fucking tough. Yeah, because I'd be hitting mine with a hammer. Look at the fucking jaw bones on this little pack. Like, damn, that thing's small. You're like, yeah, but look at that fucking smile on it. Which is brutal. Because I know girls do that. They take pictures together, and there's a lot of, like, very hyper-specific comparison

Starting point is 00:46:23 where they're like, look at my knees and her. It's like this is now, like, younger guys. I think are starting to do that to some degree, becoming very aware and conscious of, like, he's taller than me in that phone. It's like, you're fine. I don't know. That kind of freaks me out. We can't have both people.

Starting point is 00:46:39 Right. There's no, there's not a, he got frame-mogged. That was, he took a picture. That's clavicular. And he got frame-mogged because the guy stood next to him was bigger, and it was just, that's like now you descend. You were ascending, and now he descended a little bit. Damn.

Starting point is 00:46:55 It's. And there's clavicular, I mean, that guy also looks like, he looks like a fucking G&C store. Yeah, I know. So the other guys, so that's the ASU frat guy. The guy in the black is clavicular. Yes. Yeah, so that guy, yeah, it's just, it looks unnatural, I guess, is what I'm trying to say.

Starting point is 00:47:14 Yeah, dude. Well, that first of all, the guy on the right looks fucking insane, dude. He honestly looks like a fucking good, like kind of a trill lesbian. No cat, bro. No cap, dog. BLM, you know what I'm saying? You're wearing a fucking, like, bra shirt or whatever. What are you fucking doing?

Starting point is 00:47:31 And also, you know, he started all that was Larjamelo Ball, dude. It was fucking whatever. that dude wearing that bra or whatever remember he was shooting that fucking fade away or whatever? No, was he wearing a bra? Yeah, him and SGA were like

Starting point is 00:47:46 just gooning around after Oh, I think that shit I think I'd Well, this is The fuck was that? I don't know. That was... When I was growing up, mixed dudes

Starting point is 00:47:57 wasn't fucking mixed dudes had a nothing. That's what you're talking about. What the fuck is that about? No, that's not it. That's crazy. Yeah. I'm saying that's crazy.

Starting point is 00:48:06 That's wild. You don't, When do you need just that much of a shirt? Yes, take it. Yeah, you don't need it at all. Yeah, like you hit a gross spurt or whatever, dude. Dude, the sad thing about, like, the, you see that guy, that's like a very bizarre frame. With all, like, the peptides and, like, filters and all this stuff, that's what's garnering all the attention.

Starting point is 00:48:26 Like, especially for women, like, your lips have to look all. People are becoming literally artificial beings. And it's like, dude, it sounds like a really complicated thing. It's just, I think about this all the time. there's this thing called supernormal stimuli which is like, so, you know, it's, it's not as like crazy as it sounds. So, like, say they did these studies

Starting point is 00:48:43 where they had these butterflies and like the male butterflies that they saw in a female that was a shade of purple, the more purple the butterfly was, that was the more attractive they were and the butterflies would go mate with those butterflies. The scientists made a shade of purple

Starting point is 00:48:56 that wasn't able to be produced by the natural butterflies. That was like such a deep purple. The butterflies would just lay on this piece of cloth and just die. And I feel like that is happening to people in some regard. People are like, especially women are making themselves into these like artificial things. And now guys are matching.

Starting point is 00:49:14 And it's just, I don't know, it freaks me out. So you're chasing an aesthetic that's not natural and it's not attainable. And they're using all these like scientific methods. A lot of women. If women have those lip injections, dude, I'm out. Yep. If women put on too much lip, like if it's a little bit I can get, right? But if it's just fucking dumb, dude, like your lips look like they've been like, like they've been.

Starting point is 00:49:34 like they've been eating or whatever. Yeah, dude. No, I'm telling that. And there's also a fine line of plastic surgery where it almost all ends in the same exact look. There's like a fully constructed face that you're like, oh, it's just like plastic surgery face. I just feel bad because, you know, you're obviously insecure. Everybody is.

Starting point is 00:49:51 And then you do all this work and you're like, oh, my nose looks better. This looks better. And then it's like, I have this like look that I look like I'm a clone or something. Yeah, dude. It's just too much. Yeah. And then also, if a girl puts on so much lip gloss, bro, I'm like, it's just like, it's almost like you're saying.

Starting point is 00:50:08 It's like, it's too, it's like too much of the purple color. It's like, it's too juicy. Yes. No one's lips are this juicy. Right. And it's, I just feel bad because, oh, yes, I've seen this for sure. That one is. What he's wearing?

Starting point is 00:50:22 That's a rough look. He's wearing a fucking jersey bra. He's wearing a jersey bra. Look at this. Yeah, that's. I mean, what is going on? I don't know. I don't know.

Starting point is 00:50:32 Having a good time. Yeah, that's a good point, man. No, but that's, yeah, I saw that. That's one of those videos. You're like, dang, did I really look like that during that? He's still smiling. No, and the guy's a boss, dude, too. And honestly, if he's one of the, if any of these guys ended up being gay fellows or whatever.

Starting point is 00:50:48 Yeah. And being one of the best to ever do it, good for them. Exactly. Gives a shit. Gay Jordan. Gay Jordan would be nice. Just that light, that slightly lighter lift off the, that would actually be kind of sick to watch. Fly.

Starting point is 00:51:01 Floating. It's floating. It's floating. through the air. Ooh. I feel bad for like, you know, because you have,

Starting point is 00:51:07 they, they get, like, preyed upon because you're on social media and it's just nothing but before and afters, before and afters, before and afters,

Starting point is 00:51:13 and you just go after that, and you get like, you can get, like, permanently disfigured. And it's just, you know, it's just, you know, it's evil to do that.

Starting point is 00:51:22 Well, there's a lot of stuff now, too, where it's like, you know, the peptide, like all that stuff, a lot of it, there's not a ton of research done on it. We just started fucking hearing about it. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:51:30 And everybody started using it. I know. And there was, dude, I remember I was with a girl one night in her car, and I was trying to make out or something. I don't remember. But we were sitting in there talking, and she's like, yeah, I got to leave and like two hours to go down to Tia wanted to get some, Ozempig.

Starting point is 00:51:47 It's just cheaper down there. Really? Yeah. Dude, they busted a woman outside of a vineyard buying selling illegal OZimpe. Oh, bro. Yeah, that's, because you start going to the doctor, and then they all start talking to each other, and one of them gets it off the internet.

Starting point is 00:52:00 Yeah, there's, dude, so many of them are doing it. the jab. And it is kind of because you do get it. Like, you can go to a doctor, but it's like, it's kind of expensive. And all it takes is one of them being like, I got this website. I'll get it. I'll inject you. And then it's like, does this person know what they're doing? Where did they really get that? What is this stuff? And it's, I'm, I'm so freaked out about putting anything to my body. I like, I can't do it. I'll take like a new vitamin. And I'm like, I feel kind of weird today. That's me. I'm being a bitch. But it's like, I really am like. But that's Irishness, I think as well. I think so. You guys operate best on beer and stuff like that.

Starting point is 00:52:30 I think so. basic whiskey beer. Complete basics. Yeah. Adding to me, I've, I took the one, it was like a pill form that just take it for your stomach. And I think it helped. I didn't really notice much.

Starting point is 00:52:41 But the needles, man, I'm like, I get just too scared. I have one in my fridge. I can't do it. I'm like, yeah, I'm supposed to help you like sleep and burn fat. And I like look at it. I go, no, I'm not doing that. Just sits there. I'm scared of the needle.

Starting point is 00:52:54 I won't do it. Yeah, dude. Yeah. Save that bitch in case things get crazy. Shoot it in one of your fucking. plants. True. Dude, if you started peptide, you're on your plants, dude.

Starting point is 00:53:07 Next thing, you know, you have like 11 blackberries in your yard, dude. That would be nice, but yeah, we can each have, my whole family, can each have like three apiece. That'd be awesome. How good are radishes though? You mentioned radishes earlier. Radishes, man, they grow so easy, and they're like, they're good. They can get a little spicy here and there, but like those ones

Starting point is 00:53:23 are, they were rewarding because, like, this is a thing too, like, I tried to grow in carrots. Dude, the carrot greens this big. I pull the carrot out. I'm not lying. It was this fucking big. So that kind of hurts. You wait three months. Then you just kind of take it out and throw it on the ground and let it kind of decompose. Radishes just rip, man. You can grow radishes anywhere. Those bold, those under those like potatoes, radish, I think. Those things are pretty easy. Yeah, tubers or whatever they're called. I think potatoes are tubers or radish. I don't know what the hell.

Starting point is 00:53:48 Like root vegetables, I guess. They grow pretty good, man. My Grammy's to have them all in her cellar at the, back in a day, they'd have a lot of like senior citizens would have been in their cellars and stuff like that. They keep a lot of root vegetables in there. I love radishes, though. They're kind of, they've kind of disappeared for a while. You would see them kind of like shaved up like they'd fucking been, literally, like, somebody had terrorized them and put them on, like, little salads. I've seen that shredded radish. Yeah, it's kind of weird.

Starting point is 00:54:16 I feel like Mexican food brought them back into my life. Because I would see them on the tacos. And at first, I'd be like, what the fuck I'm not eating? And then I started eating them. I'm like, damn, these things are pretty good, actually. You get a fucking spicy radish. So, bro, put a little bit of salt on it? Yeah, man.

Starting point is 00:54:29 They're good. They're good. And there's something, I mean, just pulling it out of the ground, washing off and eating it. It's just, there's something awesome about that. You ever pull one right out and just wash it right there and eat it in the yard? I'd have to wash it first. So I usually bring it inside, but I'd like to. I feel like those, you got, I've like picked them off.

Starting point is 00:54:45 I picked like berries off a bush and eating them. But the radish, I'd never pulled them out of the dirt and eat them now. Do that. I should, actually. I have left a little bit of dirt on before when washing it. I'm like, it's got to be minerals and shit in here. I don't believe eating, don't believe all that eating the dirt propaganda. You can eat dirt for sure.

Starting point is 00:54:59 I wouldn't have a ton. I mean, it depends on what area. Just a dust. True. True. True. My soil is pretty good. That's the thing too. You got to work. You got to like, you got to build like a whole little colony in your soil. You know, because if you just dump soil out of a bag, it's not, it's not living. How many square feet is your garden? Oh, man, not a lot. It's probably like 40 total, if that. And then I have a little thing outside of my fence. It gets like full sun all day. That's probably another like, probably have like 50, 60 square feet total. Small. Do you have to water in the morning and evening or how does that work? I do in the summer, yeah. You have water pale, or use the hose? I have the hose. And I have like some sprinklers now.

Starting point is 00:55:35 I got to hook them up. But I just kind of water them, though, twice a day. Depending on how hot it is. If it's like super hot, that's twice a day. You put some mulch down to keep the roots from getting scorched. So it's just, it's nice, man. Especially like, when you just see a new little bud pop off your plant, it's just such a, come out in the morning and I'm like, ooh,

Starting point is 00:55:53 just a nice little treat. Yeah. And you're kind of like an orchestra conductor. of nature. Yeah, it's pretty cool. You got to be patient. You got to wait. It's like,

Starting point is 00:56:03 like, dude, I planted garlic six months ago. I might have something like in three weeks. And it's just like, it's just like a thing that's like good, that's gross. You know what I mean? That's like,

Starting point is 00:56:13 you know, because otherwise, I've had a lot of times in life where I just have nothing to look forward to. And you're just like, whatever. And every day, I'm like,

Starting point is 00:56:20 my berries eventually. Two years, I have like things that are going to take like two years to grow. And I'm like, man, two years is going to be sick. I don't like that. Like that.

Starting point is 00:56:28 I'm telling you, it's really good for you. I've been wondering if there was ever a time when you were with your family and your car broke down. Because I've been there. And I remember the car was broke down. And I stood off. I walked off from that thing. I said, I ain't even being with y'all anymore. Just didn't even want to be by my family, dang it.

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Starting point is 00:59:21 Recently I started to get up earlier and do like just really, just start to take some control. over my own life more. Yeah. Like, and it's just helped me so much, man, it's helped me to like,

Starting point is 00:59:32 I don't know, everything else just feels like more possible. It's like, oh, I'm caring about what I'm doing here. You know? Yeah. Like,

Starting point is 00:59:39 it hasn't been, like, every day has been perfect, but just like over the past month, it's gotten, like, let me see what I'm trying to say. Like,

Starting point is 00:59:48 so I'll get up and I'll, like, do some yoga, workout, meditate, hit an AA meeting or something. And then I'm like, It's like 10 a.m.

Starting point is 00:59:57 And now I'm, but in the rest of my day is mine, right? Like I don't have work and shit to do. But I just feel like, like the more I'm investing in myself or things like that, it's like it feels good. Dude, it's, yeah, it's unbelievable. Because otherwise it's like what is moving your life? You know, you're just kind of being blown about. I do that all the time where I'm just kind of like. You have to make your life mean something.

Starting point is 01:00:18 Exactly. I think when you're a kid, you come out of this time where you're like, oh, there's all these things that I get to get put into and there's somebody putting you in a shit. You don't even realize that like all this stuff happens. You're just in, but you like, we kind of lose that as we get older. You know, I mean, I know work comes along and family comes along. But it's like, yeah, you have to always feel like, oh, life has to make it. No, you have to make it. Yeah, dude, it's like 100% true.

Starting point is 01:00:40 That's actually fair. I never thought about that too because you do get thrown into school. And yeah, you're just like, well, I guess someone will throw me into a job. And then you just kind of just like drift along. And it's like, I'll do that for like stretches of time. And then like, I'll just something will happen where I'm like, Like, what the fuck am I do? And it just is a really bad feeling where I'm like, what am I doing with myself?

Starting point is 01:01:00 And then, yeah, waking up and being like, I'm going to do this at this time. I'm going to work out. I'm going to do this. Dude, it really does make your life feel so much better. It's like, even if you get up like a half an hour early. Yeah. Just like just get up and like go for a walk. Otherwise, yeah, that's a feeling that I get like really free.

Starting point is 01:01:15 Like that'll really like bring me to a bad place when I realize I'm just being blown about. Yeah. By the whims of whatever forces are around me. Especially as time goes on. I went to your birthday party. That was fun, dude. That was a fucking complete shock. So you had no idea.

Starting point is 01:01:31 No clue. Everyone was laughing at me. Like, you didn't even Google the thing. Like, my wife told me she was going to take me to an opera. And then she did it. It was actually,

Starting point is 01:01:40 to her credit, it was a pretty good move. She's like, we never do anything like that. We never get dressed up. And I was like, all right. It was boys in the hood,

Starting point is 01:01:46 the opera. I didn't know, I didn't know what the hell it was, man. I was like, everyone was laughing at me because like, didn't you Google,

Starting point is 01:01:54 the opera, wasn't even in town that weekend. I'm like, I didn't look it up. I was just showing up, man. And, uh, and, uh, 84% of life's just showing up. Yeah, man. That's what. And I, I, I really can just be like, what, like, I don't look into things. I, I, I, I, I, I realized that night, I didn't realize how little I truly, like, look into things. And I'll just, like, just be like, all right, I'll just come. I don't, I don't, I don't like research it. Because I was talking a lot of people that are like, I'd have to look at the seat chart, I have to know where I'm sitting. Yeah, that's whimsical, dude. That's like an Irish hello or whatever. I really do.

Starting point is 01:02:24 He's not knowing what the fuck is going on. No idea what's going on there. And just showing up, be like, oh, this will be cool. I was like, I'll get to see an opera. I've never seen that before. And just wait it until it came. And then, so I'm like, in my head, I'm like, I'm going to be in a dark room all night. I was like, I'm going to eat a little wheat edible. I'll be fine. So I'm literally, she was like, all the tickets we got. We get to go meet the opera singers, like before it.

Starting point is 01:02:44 I'm like a meet and greet with the opera singer. So I'm like, sounds weird, but I'm like, I'm down to meet them. This is kind of cool. I'm super gullible. And then something like kind of stoned And I just like walk into this room being like I remember the last thought I had was like I wonder what opera singers are like

Starting point is 01:03:00 Walk in and I just saw my mother-in-law and I was like What the hell? Why is she here? And then I saw someone I hadn't seen in like three years And I truly was like oh, I'm probably having a dream and I was like this is not real And I kept looking around and like the noises kind of came back and I was like surprised And I was like what the fuck? And then I got like angry I was furious at first I remember you telling me that Dude I stood there

Starting point is 01:03:23 And I was like 150 people I'm like kind of high on it I'm like this is I know This is oh completely overwhelming Surprise And then like I'm looking around me And like what the fuck She made everyone wear tuxitos and shit for this

Starting point is 01:03:34 And I'm just like Furious sorry I just felt like Oh no And then I just kind of like I like realized what was happening That I was like frowning at 150 people And I had to like

Starting point is 01:03:47 Oh hey thank you everybody And it took me like like an hour and a half to like the shock to wear off. I was I was fucked up. But you know, eventually I was like, what was the anger about you think kind of? Because I'm telling me that and that was fascinating. And your wife was great, dude, like she started like five months in advance. He's like, don't forget Friday or whatever. And I'm like, this Friday, she's like, no, Friday in five and a half months. But she would remind you every month. And I was like, fuck. And then once I said, I promise I said, I promise I'll be there. I was like,

Starting point is 01:04:16 Fuck, now I gotta be there. But it ended up being great, though. It was fun. It was a great night, dude. I got to hang out with Tony. There we are right now, Adam Eaget, Joe DeRosa. And is that your...

Starting point is 01:04:27 Zach? He works at the mothership. Yeah, he was at the mothership for a while. But yeah, dude, it was a good group, though. Dude, it was, that was... It was fun. I, though, I got there... It was just like, I don't even...

Starting point is 01:04:40 I couldn't even place the anger at first. I was just going like, what the fuck? And I was actually kind of looking forward to sitting in a dark room. night watching the, I was like, this will be crazy. And then it was just like, what I was angry about was like, I don't really like a lot of attention. So then I walked into just like a complete and total just being like a wash and attention and like surprise. And it just like, it pissed me off. Yeah. And then I was like, oh, this is like a party. This is nice. It was,

Starting point is 01:05:04 it literally took my brain a second to be like, so at first it wasn't even a party. It's like, you know what I mean? Like, these are just people looking at me. Like, why is this happening to me right now? And then I was like, it came in in layers. And I'm like, oh, fuck. this is my 40th surprise party. Because we did something two weeks before that. So I was like, nice, I'm done. So like it like took me. My brain was like lagging for like seconds.

Starting point is 01:05:25 And then, you know, I just like had to walk around and be like, hey, thanks, say thanks, say thanks. Thanks, maxing. Thanks, maxing. That was thanks maxing. Post maxing. Thanks, maxing. Dude, it would be so funny because I'd be talking like a comedian and then there'd be

Starting point is 01:05:37 just somebody who was randomly downstairs who was at the thing. And it was a nice event, man. It was like an event. Dude, it really was. And there was like a thing with desserts. And there was like. think the Haven had like a duck or something. They had great food.

Starting point is 01:05:50 They had, but then there would be also like just family members or somebody's like, I'm mad to live in the cousin or whatever, you know? You know, fire department, you know, just fucking.

Starting point is 01:06:00 I'm like, what is going on? Yeah, one of my cousins, I know I heard the next day, kind of college you was like, let's get a photo right now. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:06:07 Oh, I don't remember some things, but it was just like there was a lot of different things. And you would get like, yeah, kind of Irishy looking guys and this and that. And then a fucking, you know,

Starting point is 01:06:15 just somebody would down, syndrome who they said was Irish or whatever. And then even just down to a big freckle in a wheelchair, you know? It just like, there was this dissension of fucking McCuskas that had just been through it all, you know? Some Civil War veteran was there?

Starting point is 01:06:30 Like there was ghosts there? Yeah, people were taking it back because that was only a small faction of my family. So people that I knew would be like, because you were to see various mutations of me where you'd be like that's got to be one of his that people were like really laughing about that all night being like, I can literally

Starting point is 01:06:46 spot every single one of your family members. You guys all look exactly the same. Dude, that would be the best if they had done a thing, fine Matt's family. Like a wears one. Yes. And you had to like just like amongst all the people there. You had to get like a signature from those 10 people. That's kind of fun actually. But no, it was a, it was cool man. I, you know, I always, I gave it up to Brittany. I was like, it was very sweet of her. Very nice. Very impressive. It was, it was just such a, it was like it was like an event. It was like a massive event. And it's, you know, I'm always kind of like that I don't want to do anything, you know, blah, blah, blah. So that was, it was like, I appreciated it, but it was, it was a lot for me to take in.

Starting point is 01:07:19 Yeah, it's scary. Dude, having a surprise experience is kind of scary. Especially of that magnitude, man. That was like, that really, like, threw me upside out because I'm going like, you know, I don't like ask people to do anything. You see people wearing tuxes. I'm going, oh, fuck. So I didn't my family hates dressing up.

Starting point is 01:07:35 So I'm like, fuck, they made her, they made them do that. And, you know, I was just like, but it was cool. It was awesome. And you can, uh, um, you can. can you still be drafted or not? Oh, for the war? I think they just bought, yeah,

Starting point is 01:07:50 I think the war is a 42. Unique term. Yeah, or the military. Yeah. The conflict. The, uh, yeah,

Starting point is 01:07:57 I think it's up to 42. So if I'm, what are the requirements? And they keep fucking making the age bigger dude, dude. Yeah. 42, dude, there's a fucking,

Starting point is 01:08:06 I got two good years of me. Bro, you could be a colonel. That'd be crazy. I would, I mean, I went to college. At least I went sergeant.

Starting point is 01:08:14 Like, I'm not going in there as a grunt. Yeah. But actually, I'd kind of like to boss up as a grunt. Got to be on time. What is some of the Army chance, do? You have to do some of those probably. Yeah, it's like, I don't know what I've been told. Yeah, I thought, uh, 42 is not that old or whatever.

Starting point is 01:08:29 Welcome, America. Army raises enlistmen age to 42. Yeah, they're pandering to me. Eases marijuana restrictions, dude. So you can have fucking, dude, it's just going to be a bunch of fucking thick trans kids on gummies out there. Here was one of the problems. Did you know that 70% of young Americans are unfit to serve in the military? They couldn't serve in the military.

Starting point is 01:08:53 Yeah, I've heard that. 70%. Yeah, that's no surprise, man. That's, I mean, that's sad. That blew my mind. Really? Yeah, when I was a cat, I feel like, I, like, it felt like 70% could serve in the military. Yeah, yeah, for sure.

Starting point is 01:09:06 Yeah, some kids in wheelchair or something. You had like some black kids that were still sucking their thumb or something, even though they were like 19 and shit. Still rock it, yeah. Yeah, which is cool, but they weren't saying anything, but they weren't retarded. So you got to pick a path. But then you had like, yeah,

Starting point is 01:09:18 one kid that would get sunburn bad, he couldn't go. You had that bee sting kid or whatever. It was always a fucking piece of shit. I'm down for them just doing like battle bots. We're at the point now. Yes, what? It is ridiculous to just be like, yeah, we're going to just send a bunch of 18 year olds there to shoot each other.

Starting point is 01:09:33 So that's like, it's just like, I said this before. It's like embarrassing. Like guys, for real, we're still doing this. Let's do battlebots. Solve it, see what's up. Whoever wins gets, you know, whoever gets. Yeah, it's like pink slips. Yeah, your buzz saw flips my wedge,

Starting point is 01:09:46 and now you get the whole nukes for them. If I'll build a better robot, I'll get the nukes back, so I can destroy the world if I have to, you know, if I want to get my way. Yeah, I agree. It's like, what do... To really be using... I don't know, dude.

Starting point is 01:09:56 It's just fucking... But there's a trick where it's like, yeah, you know what, you're right. And some guy just blows up your city, and you're like, I'm fucking blowing them up. Fuck that. So it's like, you know, I think it's escapeable.

Starting point is 01:10:06 A major update to Army recruiting regulations this week raises the maximum age of recruit can join in 42 and removes a barrier to joining for recruits with a single legal conviction from marijuana or drug paraphernalia possession. Nice. The Army's previous limit was 35, though. Exceptions are occasionally made.

Starting point is 01:10:21 The higher age limit brings the Army in line with other services limit of 41 in the Navy and 42 in the Air Force. That's the weirdest of all. And again, it's, whoa, the fuck is that? That's kind of shit. I don't know. I thought that was fucking Doug Standover for a second.

Starting point is 01:10:34 On the left. Well, the, okay. Secret double life of Christy Nome's cross-dressing husband, Brian, Bimbo photos and trove of explicit messages. Yeah. He could have, that could have been a costume he was doing.

Starting point is 01:10:49 Yeah, I mean, see. It's today revealed as a secret cross-dresser who dons gigantic fake breast and pink hot pants to chat with online fetish models. Ooh, that's the porn hole going wrong, man. Yeah. So you need to shut the laptop. Once you're putting,

Starting point is 01:11:04 when you're bimbifying yourself or webcam? Is that what happened? He was bim bim bim bifing. It looks like, well, his wife operated the highest echelons of government handling matters of national security in a recent role as DHS secretary

Starting point is 01:11:14 Brian Noam 56 has been dressing up and playing adult and paying adult entertainers to talk dirty The Daily Medal has reviewed hundreds of messages

Starting point is 01:11:24 involving three women From the bimbification scene Where porn performers Transfer themselves into real-life Barbie dolls By pumping colossal amounts of saline Into their breath Oh, that's what was That was his boobs basically

Starting point is 01:11:35 From saline? Yeah, so he pumped his Was he pumping his own tits Full of that shit? God. Okay. No, he had balloons. Okay.

Starting point is 01:11:44 Oh. Brian, an insurance mobile could be seen squeezing into a flesh-colored crop top with skin-tight pink shorts. Hold on those those tits were balloons with the nipple. Oh, the knots mimic the nipples. I mean, I'll at least shout them out on the nipple position. That was, that's pretty smart. That was kind of nice. Dang, bro.

Starting point is 01:12:04 What the fuck, dude? What the fuck is going on? Bro, that's nice for balloons. I'll get, whoa, what the fuck? Oh, man. But he has that kind of glossy skin where he's fucking, you know what I'm saying? That's a horny guy. I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that that's kind of alpha.

Starting point is 01:12:22 To be that horny where you have balloon boobs like a fifth grader? No, it sounds like what those fucking clavicular kids are going to be doing. Putting fucking hacky sacks in their chest and shit. Yeah, man, that is a... He sent his secret roster of online acquaintances at least $25,000 of your cash out in PayPal. But when the payments were delayed or, to materialize the chats would quickly turn sour. Oh, I bet I would.

Starting point is 01:12:44 If I paid fucking $25,000, look at my balloon tits and you didn't, uh, you delayed on me. I turned sour. Damn. Oh, dude. So they, they kind of like put his stuff out there. Yeah, it's a sounding that somebody who spouses at that level has that kind of bad judgment.

Starting point is 01:13:01 Oh, whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Bro. I didn't know this is a thing, dude. Yeah, I guess it is, dude. Honestly, bro, all this shit makes me want to cut my own.

Starting point is 01:13:10 wiener off and just mail it to Africa, dude. I'm not even joking, dude. I thought about that for years. Cut my wiener off. Be done. Yeah. If they want it, or just whatever you want.

Starting point is 01:13:22 You can do it, send them both. Keep your nuts because that'll keep your tea going and stuff. That way you'll be charged up. Let your nuts hang. Chop off your unit and just keep everything out. And mail it to Africa. Feed a person or two. That'd be nice.

Starting point is 01:13:35 They grill that bitch off in a second, dude. Munch that thing. They get some fucking Tennessee wiener in the mail. They would grill that bit on a toothpick and serve it at a party with others. But yeah. I know, dude. They'd be like glizzy. Glizzy.

Starting point is 01:13:52 No, it's, that's a glizzy. A fresh glizzy. But that is sad, man. It's like, yeah, it's a... From the way here, the Uber driver. He's like, we need a revolution. You a podcast guy. He was, but you're pumped up.

Starting point is 01:14:07 Yeah, no, he's trying to get me to fucking do something. I'm like, dude, I'm fucking trying to go. I'm going to work, dude. He's probably CIA, honestly. He could have been in fucking up. He's probably massage. But it was just kind of crazy. He's like, we need a revolution.

Starting point is 01:14:18 Yeah. Because he's like, AI's going to come. It's going to be all Waymos. We won't have a job, you know? That's true, too. Yeah, that stuff's coming, man, for sure. That's going to be weird.

Starting point is 01:14:27 I mean, it is going to be a... You're not scared of it, though, you said. No, not really. I mean, it's like, I... Well, here's the thing. It's like, if I felt like it was coming and it would just, like, destroy my livelihood, I'd obviously be afraid of that.

Starting point is 01:14:41 I don't think it is. And I feel bad if it does, but I feel like maybe this is me just being hopeful, it will kind of engender some like massive change where people then have to like learn how to, you know, like do we start just sharing stuff? So everyone has what they need. Like what do you, like literally what do you know?

Starting point is 01:14:58 And people go, that's communistic. It's like, yeah, obviously. But it's like if it wipes out just like nine industries at once and you have millions and millions of people who could work that just there's no point for them to do it. It's like, what do you do? Like, what do you do then? And it's like, are they going to have to just like invent weird, like almost like fake jobs?

Starting point is 01:15:15 Are people going to get paid just to kind of vibe out? I don't know. I'm personally kind of curious to see where it goes. Because it's like, you're not going to fight the AI stuff. Everyone's like, we're going to stop it. It's like, no, you're not. If it saves big corporations money, it's coming. They're going to do that.

Starting point is 01:15:29 And then it becomes like, what do you do? And I guess like, you know, yeah, it could get now that I think about it. It's like, well, yeah, maybe the billionaires will, like give us some money. I'm like, well, they said that fuck, you think they will? Well, that's what they've said. said is that people would get some sort of a stipend or some sort of a UBI, universal basic income or some sort of a token that they could use for things, like for, which is crazy to hear.

Starting point is 01:15:51 Like Altman said this sort of shit. This is a king then. So then we'd have kings. Which, again, if we go back to some like futuristic medieval like serfs, lords, kings, nights, could be chill. I don't know. Again, I don't know. There's probably people like, fuck you.

Starting point is 01:16:04 Could be chill, though. Could be chill, dude. You get to like wander. I get to just be in my garden, light fires and just kind of. of like think about the glory of the king. Yeah. King Sam Altman. King Altman.

Starting point is 01:16:16 It cuts my fucking head off. He cuts your fucking ram down. He cuts your hard drive down to fucking 30 megabytes a month. No more questions about your garden. I'm like, sorry, my lord. And then that thing comes through where you throw the dead people just on it, like if your neighbor dies. Remember back in they're like in the, the wheelbarrow dead part? whatever, yeah.

Starting point is 01:16:41 Yeah, I think, and this is my, again, this is just shit, he had my fucking ear pods in his pocket. We put him on the fucking bed cart. This is me being in a real car. Hey, hey. Humanity. Check his pocket. It's a fat guy.

Starting point is 01:16:54 You got to follow on your device. Yeah. I feel like, you know, every society rises and then falls in a terrible cataclysm. That's like, there hasn't been one that's made it out of it yet. So like maybe, it's like with COVID. There was, with COVID was bad, but it also. did kind of shake people out of that like dull, thoughtless malaise that so many people are trapped in just like a meaningless existence they kind of hate. So I'm hoping the AI

Starting point is 01:17:19 shakes the cage enough to where people can kind of come out of it, but then we don't all just like fall into like complete chaos and start like killing each other. Yeah. I think there's a sweet spot. So I'm hoping it kind of shakes it just a little bit. That makes sense. Yeah. So that that's my hope. But it's like, yeah, then it's like, well, maybe the billionaires will be generous. I'm like, eh. Well, to me, it feels like they, They want us poisoned enough, right? It's obvious there's so much that it has poisoning. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:17:44 Yeah. Or fucking water. Fluoride makes people dumb. Like if you have fluoride in your water, you're dumber. Yeah. Yeah. Which is crazy, dude. Mm-hmm.

Starting point is 01:17:53 But like, they want us to be dumb enough and, like, not have any fucking balls or want to do. And so you just are kind of like in this sort of wheel. Yeah. And you're comfortable in the wheel. And the amazing thing to me sometimes is how comfortable a lot of us are in the wheel, including myself. Oh, yeah. You're like, you know what?

Starting point is 01:18:12 I could go out there and protest sometimes, or I could do this or, you know, but I could just sit here and watch March Madness. Yeah. You know, just got some new massive chips. I got some fucking good ranchers nuggets in the mail. Massa chips are nice, bro. I love those things.

Starting point is 01:18:26 They're nice. If you eat too many of them, though. Yeah, that's a fucked up belly. And I don't eat them anymore. I had like six bags in a row or whatever. I can't have them anymore. No, you eat the whole bag. And you're like, I just ate a pound of beef tallow.

Starting point is 01:18:38 Well, it's like having gym when you're a kid or whatever. You can't have it anymore. You know? But it's like that. For me, it just kind of burnt out. The thing that I'm hopeful about is that like, you know, because if it becomes like, if money becomes a weird thing where it's like there's UBI and like, you do have these like rich billionaire overlords, like money is the thing.

Starting point is 01:18:55 If you have enough of it, it kind of like, you know, pumps up your ego to where you're like, yeah, I did it. I'm the man. I've always wondered if we could somehow trick like ultra rich like billionaire types into being like, no, the real flex is like putting like nine. million people on like assistance and making like a cool future peaceful village and like getting them to think like yeah that would be cool if I did that you know what I mean like yeah like why wouldn't you do that you just have to make up their nerds like so like Zuckerberg you'd be like instead of like

Starting point is 01:19:21 attacking them be like dude actually Zuckerberg's super jacked and super tough and cool jihitsu and be like just like giving the nerds everyone like yeah we love you guys and maybe they'll just like you know use billions of dollars to terraform the earth into like a cool hobbit world I don't know now now I'm just I don't reach it we start to wonder is it an evil all Autism that's out there. Yeah, we need to give them the, we need, yeah, exactly. I think you could be completely right. Because, yeah, to think that you'd have billions of dollars and other people don't have

Starting point is 01:19:48 anything is pretty crazy. Yeah, but that's, that's the thing, though, because it's like, I think about that all the time, and it's like, White House turns down Elon Musk, offer to pay TSA agents during DHS shutdown. Why? That thing was like, well, yeah, we can't pay the TSA guy. This is, I'm a single issue voter and it's wait times at airports currently. But it's like, dude, just take this. the TSA out of that, because they're trying to both pass these, like, big deals where it's like,

Starting point is 01:20:13 well, we'll do the TSA, but you have to agree to this. Both are doing it. Those omnibus bills. Yeah, yeah, it's like, take TSA out of it. You guys can go, okay, let's fund TSA. Okay, back to have arguing about bullshit forever. It's just, dude, that shit pisses me off. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:20:25 Musk, the CEO of Tesla and owner of social media platform X, uh, said, uh, offered to pay the salaries on Saturday. I would like to offer to pay the salaries of TSA personnel during this funding impasse. That is negatively affecting the lives of so many Americans at airports throughout the country he wrote on that. President Trump said money that he would love it if Musk paid the agent's salaries. I think it's great. Let him do that. The offer for Musk was also warmly received by lawmakers. But then this is the, here's the problem this. No, I don't pay him. Right. John Federman said the offer was incredibly generous in his response to the post. TSA agents across the country relying on food, pantries and community donations just to get by.

Starting point is 01:20:59 DHS officials told House lawmakers Wednesday that over 480 airport screeners have quit since the beginning of the shutdown and that the, the agency is expected to lose $1 billion in missed paychecks by the end of this week. Dude, Timothy Mellon, era of Mellon banking, shout out Pittsburgh, donated $130 million to pay the military during the 43-day-long government shutdown from October to November. But what's crazy is, this could be a trap because then you're letting kind of X or Tesla become this privatized, you know, because now you're kind of privatizing airport security. Yeah. Whether you realize it a little bit or not, you're saying, okay, we'll let him pay these salaries.

Starting point is 01:21:40 Then he comes in and says, well, how about this? Why don't I just, why don't Tesla dismanage airport security? Yeah, yeah. We could probably do it so much more efficiently. Yeah. And so that's the, like I'm not, which I'm not saying would be bad. I'm just saying that's where things get kind of risky. A lot of times like offers like that, there's this kind of caveat of, of hopeful business on the line.

Starting point is 01:21:59 Dude, I didn't know this until recently. Public transportation in Chicago and like, I think the late 1800s, there's all public company or private companies. So, like, you would just own, like, you know, whatever, like if you're in New York, it was like, but it's Chicago, like the L train. That was a guy who owned the L train. Everyone who paid tickets, all the money went to him. And there was another guy who owned, like, the North Side Public. And they all, eventually the city came. It was like, that was like that for a while.

Starting point is 01:22:24 It was, like, incredibly competitive and corrupt. And you'd have to lobby the government to, like, pass your thing. You'd pay people off. Then you just collected all the fares personally. Didn't, like, didn't even go to the city. So, yeah, it's a, that is a trick. thing though because they can you know then they can start doing their weird like credit card I mean you don't get great customer service with government agencies.

Starting point is 01:22:44 No dude. Have you been to the post office? Post office is crazy. There was a, there was like this sister that was working in there. She's fucking fighting with a bird that's in there trying to steal like a fucking thing of tape or whatever. And I'm like like in the little gift section area. I'm like there's nobody else in there.

Starting point is 01:23:00 Dude. When going by is just fucking unbelievable. I was an Asian dude. peeked up out of the back for like a second they got with the mustache and the fucking catfish looking dude. One of those packaged catfishes. He's just back there. He swims up to the fucking door

Starting point is 01:23:16 and peeks around just to make sure he's not, nobody's looking for him and fucking goes back into the fucking hiding behind the seven day certified male. You'll never see him for a week. 40 more years. He's just to hide for 40 more year. He's like he saw his own shadow. It's like 11 more months

Starting point is 01:23:32 of fucking being on the clock on the government's dime. Post office is crazy. do I used to mail all of our merch. In the beginning, I would mail all of our merch personally. So I started going to the post office. It was just like boxes of like 45, 50, 60 shirts already wrapped up. And like I got to know the people there pretty well. But it was like at first I would just show up.

Starting point is 01:23:51 Before they knew me, they'd be like, what are you doing to us? And then they eventually gave me another address where I could just like drop it off at the like hub. And they would just take them like a big thing at once and just throw them in the thing. But it was funny. Yeah, I used to get, I used to go there. And they let me like come towards the back and dump it in. Fuck yeah, it's kind of cool to see it behind the scenes. It was cool, but it was just, it's very, it is like chill time.

Starting point is 01:24:10 If there's a line at the post office, people are like, okay. It's like DMV mentality. You're like, yeah, whatever, man. Don't care. They don't feel lines. No, they really, they really don't. You only feel lines on one side of the counter. The other side of the counter, they don't feel that line.

Starting point is 01:24:23 No, it's not a restaurant where you're like, oh, fuck, people are going to leave. Yeah, fuck it. Go use fucking something else. Public transit in Chicago shifted from private to public control in the mid-20th century, centered on their creation of the Chicago Transit Authority, the CTA in the 19th century. The Illinois General Assembly passes the Metropolitan Transit Authority at 1945. When the CTA took over the big private rail and streetcar systems and effectively completed for city service 19 to do with the motor coach purchase. Yeah, anyway.

Starting point is 01:24:53 Yeah. That's when it happened. True. I say you've been doing some history pods. Yeah, all my Patreon. I've been getting deep into like the Conquistador era, like the Spaniards going first to like, like, Yucatan in Mexico to like, you know, when Cortez kind of took over the Aztecs, and then there's another guy who, like,

Starting point is 01:25:14 navigated the Amazon River, like, later on. And they, like, the Pizarros took out the Incan Empire. Those, dude, those stories are, like, insane. And that's, I've talked to, I talked to the author who wrote both the books I was talking about, and we're both agreeing. It's like, dude, that's a movie. I talked to this other guy about this, too,

Starting point is 01:25:32 where it's like, the fact that there's no movie about that yet, it's insane, because it is, like, especially Cortez taking over the Aztecs. It's the craziest story. Because everyone's like, oh, yeah, he showed up and, like, tricked Montezuma. Like, they did do that, but it was like, it was like a multi-year effort. They had, like, brutal battles. It went on, like, forever.

Starting point is 01:25:51 And they were, like, inside Tenich,etland, which was, like, the city of the Aztex. Dude, that was, like, a brutal siege. They barely escaped, had to come back and attack it again. It was absolutely insane. Were they bad people that they were attacking or they were just people that they wanted their land? or it was just like during that colonial times? It was a little bit of everything. It was definitely during the colonial times.

Starting point is 01:26:10 The Spaniards definitely just wanted gold. They were like, yeah, you guys have gold. We're taking the shit. Oh, yeah. Cortez wasn't even supposed to do it. He was sent by another guy, Velazquez, who was like, take this flotilla of ships. They were in, I, what was it, like, Cuba maybe or somewhere?

Starting point is 01:26:25 And they were like, he was like, I want you to scout this Mexico, whatever place. And, you know, see if they have any gold or slaves and, you know, bring them back to me. That's crazy, dude. Dude, so Cortez is like, like for sure, he just took 13 ships and was like, fuck that guy. I'm going on an expedition to conquer. So he just, it was like completely illegal.

Starting point is 01:26:43 You know, it was all like fucked up. But he just was like, I'm doing my own thing. Like a pirate basically. Yeah, it's like when you bar, like when your dad's like, hey, go fill my car by gas, but you take it to go see your girl. Yeah, dude, for like the ultimate version. It's like if he gave you a fleet of like trucks and he were like, yo, let's go. And it was like he just rolled up there with three, 300, 400 guys.

Starting point is 01:27:02 and they just battled and just battled and like made alliance. That was the thing that helped them. They made so many alliances with different people that hated the Aztecs. And it was like, you know, everyone was like the Spaniards. You know, they did some stuff that was obviously horrible. But the problem was in like the Aztec times, it was all kind of like Yucatan Peninsula, southern Mexico, up into like central. And so you were just being a village and the Aztec chiefs would be like,

Starting point is 01:27:26 yo, it's time for taxes, but their taxes were sacrifice victims. So they would come down and be like, give us like 30 people. So you'd be living together And they'd be like, yeah, We're gonna fucking chop you up, chop you up, let's go. And like, they would just snag Most of your babes and you'd be like, fuck. So then Cortez comes and they're like,

Starting point is 01:27:42 Yeah, I'll help you fuck those guys up. So they're all like kind of against each other. And then like the thing that really kind of like It's fucked up, but it'd make me laugh. They would befriend the natives there. And the natives would be like, Oh, you guys seem cool. Want to see something cool that we like

Starting point is 01:27:54 And they would take them to one of these like religious temples. And it would just be like a dog with its head bashed in Like little kids' bones. They'd like, yeah, we fucking chop that dog's head. head off and they'd be like, what the fuck? What are you guys doing? What's wrong with you guys? So there was like, you know, and they say the Spaniards exaggerated a lot

Starting point is 01:28:10 of the sacrifice, but it was like, it was definitely on the books and like, so they got there and they were like greedily looking for gold, but then they'd be like, these guys are chopping off kids' heads and kicking them down the steps. They're like, fuck these guys. That's kind of how they were thinking. These guys need Jesus. We're going to kill them and turn them

Starting point is 01:28:26 into slaves and give them Jesus and take their gold and we're doing a good thing. So it was like, it was kind of fucked up all around on us, in my opinion. like nobody knew, you know what I mean? Like, they didn't think it was bad. So do you think like it kind of goes to an overall idea of like, yeah, do you think that like human existence is like a trial to see of like good versus evil or like, like I wonder what it is, you know? And then, you know, as things start to get weird and stuff, then you start realizing well, most countries always live under like some severe oppression. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:28:58 With no hope of like a lot of freedoms. Yeah. with not even the ability to express themselves in some ways. Oh, dude, yeah, for sure. Like, yeah, you start to realize that like, I don't know. It's just, I don't know. I just, yeah, you wonder like it. And then you start to think, well, how does this end?

Starting point is 01:29:12 Like, does this end well? But then if that, if, if you had groups at that time, if you had Cortez traveling around and realizing, okay, we believe these are bad people, we need to bring them into some sort of enlightenment of understanding. Is that the right way? You know, it's just, I don't know. No, dude, it's, it's really tricky.

Starting point is 01:29:30 and so they were legally also, they were legally bound, so you'd roll into a village and you'd hope they're peaceful, otherwise you're just doing battle. I think that first 10 minutes has got to be a tough. It's very tough,

Starting point is 01:29:40 but luckily for them, they'd roll up, dude, they'd roll up in like, on a horse, which first of all, the Aztecs, they would see a per,

Starting point is 01:29:45 and the lions were there as well, but they would like, they would see a dude in metal on a horse and think this was like some new type of being. Like a Tesla? They never saw,

Starting point is 01:29:55 yeah, they never saw someone riding a horse. So they thought the man and the horse became like one weird creature, and they were like, what the fuck? And they would just come at you 30 miles an hour with a steel sword, and it was terrifying.

Starting point is 01:30:06 And then, like, cannon fire. That, like, helped him out a lot. But yeah, they just thought they were, like, aliens. They didn't know what the fuck they were. They were like, and then, you know, they, like, killed a couple of the Spaniards, and they were like, oh, we can kill these guys. And they were, you know, munch them.

Starting point is 01:30:16 So, wow. It's munch them a little bit. But, yeah, it was, dude, things do seem to be getting better overall. Like, that dude, that's, like, rolling into a village, you're like, I'm hungry. I want some gold. Fucking, you know, Cortez wouldn't, He would be like nice enough, but then as soon as people started fucking fucking fucking

Starting point is 01:30:32 fucking burn villages down, burn people alive. It's like brutal stuff. That's a dude, that's a crazy mix. So I'm hungry. I want some gold. Yeah. Well, they would be starving. They would be walking, walking, walking.

Starting point is 01:30:43 Like, fuck, we don't have enough food. And you just see a village. You got to go munch these guys of shit. Dude. And, bro, you think there was hot babes back then at that time? For sure. Oh, yeah, 100%. I mean, probably healthier babes.

Starting point is 01:30:57 Healthy? I mean, yeah, true. I mean, but here's the thing, though, it's like, it's all relative because, like, you know, you're, uh, these guys are all by the way, like 21, 22. So you're a 22 year old Spanish guy in 1600s or, you know, late 1500s. There's guys probably, they're on like legendary no-faps. All of them, they probably weren't like beating off every day to porn hub. That's a great. These guys are, the chambers fully fucking cocked.

Starting point is 01:31:21 Yeah. So, yeah, they were probably like any, they probably, you know, there's obviously a lot of brutal rape and stuff going on. But like, but, like, but yeah, Cortez famously. in one of the battles, the general handed him, like, here's a bunch of women, like, blah, blah,

Starting point is 01:31:34 and one of them happened to be a former princess from, like, one of the chieftains, who then got sold into sex slavery by, like, you know, a warring tribe, who then got given to Cortez

Starting point is 01:31:45 as, like, you know, a sex slave, but she happened to be a princess, Melinche, who, like, was, like, honestly, one of the key figures

Starting point is 01:31:52 who helped him translate all the languages so that he could move about what he did. I don't know if he could have done it without her. She's pretty crazy. Wow.

Starting point is 01:31:58 They became, they became, lovers, man. They were like, they were thick as thieves. And Cortez had a wife the whole time living in Cuba. So when his wife, after he finally won, he finally wins over, defeats the Astic Empire, takes it over himself. That's great. His wife comes over to visit him. She's like, all right, this fucking guy has been gone. I don't know where the hell he is. He's been gone for two years. Cortez has a child with his new babe who, like, been through it all with him. Yeah. And his wife shows up, kind of gives him an earful. Dude, he choked her to death. and he's just, that was just his baby.

Starting point is 01:32:29 It was pretty fucking brutal. Damn. It's pretty brutal shit, man. Yeah, that's a crazy love story. It's, it's the bizarrest love triangle. But dude, if your guy conquers a bunch of shit like that, you got to chill the first week or something. Dude, you can't just be coming up.

Starting point is 01:32:42 Yeah, you can't get out the car mouth at all. You know? He literally, it was like a savage conquest, and it was like, you know, he's there with all of his bros and, like, he was also, he had made these alliances with these other, like, you know, indigenous factions who, like, when they beat the Aztecs finally, they all had a party the night of. And they're, like, the, you know, the Spaniards was, like, drinking, fucking around.

Starting point is 01:33:07 Dude, these, like, Aztec dudes were, like, cutting off their enemy skin and, like, walking around in it. And, like, you're just all party. They had, like, a brutal, fucked up, like, two-day party that they all woke up from. And we're like, let's say mass right now. That was kind of wild. And then his wife came to visit, mouthed off, and he just killed her. Damn.

Starting point is 01:33:23 Yeah, it's fucked. That's a fucked up story. It is. But it's the story that we keep living. It's just crazy, like, that, you know, you don't know who's supposed to be, like, the righteous ones, who's supposed to win, what the whole thing is,

Starting point is 01:33:38 who's doing things in the name of the right purpose. You know, you're trying to go off of some moral calculations that you feel like you have, but then we're all, like, immoral. We're all, like, broken people. So it's like, I don't know, man. No, that's, that's a thing, too. Like I said, I try to, like, you know, keep, like,

Starting point is 01:33:56 At least an open mind to like, all right, well, even with Iran, it's like, say they do make a nuclear weapon, and then they drop it on whoever. It's like, yeah, maybe they have this. I don't know, but it's like. But they're dropping it. They're not, they're not dropping them. Or they're just going to use it to get like a seat at the table.

Starting point is 01:34:11 I think that's what people do with nukes. You make them and you're like, all right, can we fucking, we get at the big boy table now? Yeah, I can fucking get in here. So yeah, I don't know. You know what I have no idea. That's got to be crazy. Now, do you also think, though,

Starting point is 01:34:21 I have a sweet feeling. Do you also think, though, you can kind of see how like these fucking mega lords and tech lords and shit, like, um, like, they start to just sit around and the like, they all got in room like, dude, we're the fucking, we own the world, right? They have, there's no way they don't, dude, right. Right. You're 100% right. And they be like, well, we should obviously make sure the world stays like this, that we own it. Let's keep everybody fucking dumb. Let's keep doing this shit.

Starting point is 01:34:49 And let's keep bossing out and drinking. kid dick or whatever until we live forever. You know, like I just feel like there's got to be, that has to be like, and then you, because you start to wonder how could people at a certain level get to that, but they must think, well, if I'm this fortunate, this must, God must want me to, you know what I'm saying? Yeah. Because if you have been so fortunate and you do have a religious beliefs and your ego gets

Starting point is 01:35:16 involved, I could see how you could end up on that road. For sure. God wants me to do things this way. And then you start justifying whatever you do. Or it's the opposite. And you have no religious convictions at all. And you go like, this is, it's just, you know, it's like the, those people who look at the world where it's like, yeah, strongest person wins. The whole point of life is to be comfortable and like in a dominant position.

Starting point is 01:35:37 And then like there's people who have that. That's like genuinely their philosophy. So like, yeah, I'll just leverage technology to gain more and more power to my advantage. And it's like that shit's scary, especially when they get into like the realistic possibility of becoming. becoming biologically immortal and you're like, fuck, dude. Like, I just want to grow my radishes, man. Just let me grow my radishes. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:35:58 It's freaked out, man. It is really freaked out. But it's also like, I don't think there's a lot of peace, though. If you're, like, running some cybertronic fucking war surveillance apparatus, I don't think those guys are chilling. I don't think they feel good. I think some of them don't feel. Yeah, that's fucking that's.

Starting point is 01:36:15 So that's the scary part is they don't have the thing. Yeah, I think you're actually right about that. Like to them, it's all the fucking game when they die. They just short circuit. You know what I'm saying? They don't have like a lot of these people that feels like don't have something. No, yeah, you could be right about that. But yeah, man, I agree.

Starting point is 01:36:32 It's like get back to what can you control, right? So you make a garden. You go on a nice walk. You spend some time with your neighbors. You do things that feel good while you're alive. You know, we didn't create the world. We're just here in it. And, yeah, I don't know.

Starting point is 01:36:50 It's all cyclical too, man. It's like it'll, it's going to rise and fall. And, you know, it's, again, it's the problem that's like, yeah, hopefully this time, this isn't the time where like everything pops off and we all just get wiped out in a hot flash. It's like, that is, that's scary. But like, what are you going to like run into the White House and just get like shot in the face by secret security? It's just like you have to just chill. It's like nothing you can really do.

Starting point is 01:37:10 Let me see this. Stephen Pinker argues that by most measurable indicators, violence, health, wealth, rights, and knowledge humans are doing better now than in any previous time, even though it feels like things are getting worse. I don't fucking believe that guy. Well, I mean, it's like, yeah, there's probably less kind of crime and, like, large-scale violence. It's just, you just, it's, problem is just the information. You get bombarded with just, like, all this horrible shit.

Starting point is 01:37:34 Right. And I think there's still, like, you know, news outlets are, it's all, everything is, I believe that this is, it depends on what you mean. If you don't care about existing and, like, feeling like you can grow as a human, And then maybe so. I thought we were past some of this like old school colonial shit. We're just going to, you know, you'd think we would get past that. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:37:58 But, um, no, it's the same thing. They're going to, they did it with Iraq. They're going to go, oh, there's like an existential threat. Like, try to think back on since. But America knows it's not true now. We know it's not true. That's the problem. And it's not our people, nobody's upset at our soldiers or anything.

Starting point is 01:38:12 That is just the people putting them out there in harm's way and to think about that shit. Well, it's like, dude, think about a time there hasn't been a giant looming. existential threat overhead since like literally the atom bomb. It was like terrorism was the big one and that was like the Iraq war you know back in like when I before that it was just like

Starting point is 01:38:29 Fox News my parents would watch it and it would just be like crime in the city it'd be like the inner cities are out of control they're gonna come kill you always and then it was just like terrorists are gonna come fucking kill you and it was like white supremac

Starting point is 01:38:40 remember they threw that there in the middle yeah yeah then there was unsolved mystery unsolved mysteries was fucking good though I like it was banging maybe you that helps solve a mystery. And do we go outside and I'm fucking looking for missing people

Starting point is 01:38:54 in our area? We're like, are you Rebecca Owens? Sadly, I never stepped up to the plate. I was in passive of unsolved mysteries. I never even tried. I kind of, I feel bad about that. I used to collect all those one of here on the missing cards and ones that came in the mail.

Starting point is 01:39:07 Yeah. And I'd fucking look at those bitches on my list. That's good. I was all felt like I was like, because I always wanted to find somebody that was missing or always wanted to find like a dead body or something. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:39:18 I was just talking. to a guy today. He does a, for a living, I had him on my show. For a living, he goes into bank-owned foreclosures, and his job is to, like, assess what bad, how bad of a condition it's in. And he's been multiple times come in, just a dead body. And he said, you just kind of, like, you know, you gotta, like, give it a, you know, respectful nudge. And then you call, if, like, call the cops or whatever, come get it. You think the first time you nudge, you nudge, light, and then after a while, you fucking get a little tough, like the fourth and fifth time, you fucking just give it a, I think you give it too solid, just, mm-mm, like a hard-knocked.

Starting point is 01:39:48 just two. You got to make sure. Just give it one, and then just like, in case it's waking up. Then no response. Like, yeah, it's a dead person. I'm in the house of the dead person by myself. And I got to call the cops.

Starting point is 01:39:59 Yeah. They must have had to get exterminator right. Yeah. That's the great you are, dude. There you go right there, dude. Is that J. Rod the electrician? Shout out J. Rod the electrician, dude. If you haven't followed that guy's journey, it's the best.

Starting point is 01:40:16 But yeah, having a garden, doing things that build your own life up. They give you purpose, right? that's the thing. Let me do something with my kids. Let me fucking look at this dead rat. You know what I'm saying? Let me check out this dead rat space. Let me start a history podcast.

Starting point is 01:40:28 Let me learn about journeys that were before me. You know, I think we have to start to create our own senses of purpose. We have to find new ones in our lives. Yeah, man. I think I totally agree. And it's like, you know, I just, for me, it's just like, I'm weary of the news apparatus,

Starting point is 01:40:42 information. Whenever I find myself getting angry, you know, it's again, it's just like, I just have to ask myself, like, am I getting pulled into some weird thing? I try to just like, you know, it guess it sounds like a cop-out, but like stay out of that as much as possible.

Starting point is 01:40:55 Like, what can I do? It's like I'll try to make people laugh if I can and just make like, you know, some vaguely entertaining in some fashion stuff. And then just try to conduct myself and like, tend to the stuff around me because it's like, I don't fucking know what the hell's going on.

Starting point is 01:41:07 It's like, I don't, you know, I have no idea. I can surmise and guess and I think I have, you know, idea, but it's like, I don't know. Yeah. I just be like, look, man, that's, if someone calls me to ask me to help with the situation.

Starting point is 01:41:19 I'll try to do what I can, but it's like, it's just, you know, you're almost like, sometimes I feel like I'm just spinning my wheels or it's just like, I'm getting like,

Starting point is 01:41:26 kind of worked over a little bit to where it's like, man, these guys, they're in my head right now. And I'm, you know, that's like dangerous, man. I'm supposed to get like,

Starting point is 01:41:32 collective anger. You can just fucking, you can move that stuff around and like people, you can do stuff with it. It's like, I'm always kind of weary where I'm like,

Starting point is 01:41:38 I don't know, man. Yeah, that's part of the trap too. You start to realize, well, this is part of the trap. They want us to be upset. Yeah. There's a reason why they have all this information that's out there. So much of it is still under control that there's a reason why this little bit and this got leaked.

Starting point is 01:41:51 And it's like, yeah, I don't know, being alive is interesting, man. I will say it gets more and more interesting. It does. I agree. The older you get, I think it does get more and more interesting for sure. I like getting older. A lot of people are always like, oh, man, this sucks. I'm like, I'm excited to be 50, dude.

Starting point is 01:42:06 Like, this is going to be awesome. You just got 40, man. I know. I'm going to be 40. I'm going to chill and be 40. but it's like I don't have the I think it's cool I don't know

Starting point is 01:42:12 something about getting older is like everyone I guess when you start hurting all over it probably sucks but I kind of I dig it I like getting older getting gray

Starting point is 01:42:19 I want to get I want to look like old as fuck as fast as possible it's my goal right now really I'm trying to age max yeah yeah

Starting point is 01:42:26 that's fucking dope bro this is a dye job by the way I'm like jet black normally is it really no

Starting point is 01:42:33 no no I'm really stressed out well dude thanks for coming in in chatting with this, bro. Dude, for sure. Thanks for. Upcoming dates,

Starting point is 01:42:44 the Fitzgerald Theater for Matt McCusker. Hoyt Sherman plays. Des Moines, St. Paul, Phoenix, Tucson. Phoenix and Tucson, man,

Starting point is 01:42:55 you guys got to show up. Toronto. Oh, the Elgin's a cool spot, dude. Toronto's been good. I'm happy with Toronto. In Chicago. Let's go.

Starting point is 01:43:02 That's my. I'm stoked on that. Dude, thank you for that. Yeah, dude. Thanks for, and I got to come and do you guys to show again when I'm back in town.

Starting point is 01:43:09 Please. Please do it. That'd be awesome. Next time it's, uh, we gotta come and do. We did that one last time with LaMere. It was awesome, dude. Yeah. Blonkeys or whatever I think he's called. Blonkeys was great. That was,

Starting point is 01:43:19 I think that might have been an all-time episode for real. That was awesome. Yeah, dude, it's fun when you sit down. So thank you, bro. I appreciate it. Yeah, tell Brittany, thanks for inviting me to the party. For sure. It was a good time.

Starting point is 01:43:31 Thanks for coming. Dude, it was great. I'm glad I got to see you and just be there for you. So many people love you. It's so funny. You're like the one guy when you say something like, Oh, man, McCas for people like, God. He's a great guy.

Starting point is 01:43:42 It's almost like you're dead. But they say that shit about you while you were alive. It is kind of fucked up. Like, God, if he were here right now, we would fucking, hi, dog him. He was a great guy. It's nice to be getting eulogized. Just like, yeah, he was a great guy.

Starting point is 01:43:57 When you get living eulogies, dude, I think you're doing a good job, man. Thanks for all your service to humanity, dude. And Matt and Shane's Secret Podcasts. And what's the new history podcast called? It's just on our Patreon. That's just a thing I do on our Patreon. Shane was gone filming, so I had to like, I had to just read books. I had to rely on, like, cool books, you know.

Starting point is 01:44:13 That was, that was kind of move. But it was like I can't just make up stuff to talk about. Yeah. So, yeah, I just had the books. Yeah, man. Thanks, bro. Thank you for everything, dude. Good to see you.

Starting point is 01:44:22 Dude, appreciate you. Yeah, man. Thank you. Now, I'm just floating on the breeze, and I feel I'm falling like these leaves. I must be cornerstone. Oh, I'll share this piece of mind. I found I can. Lanzania, medium power, 15 minutes.

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This Past Weekend - #652 - Matt McCusker

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