This Past Weekend - E292 Chelcie Lynn

Episode Date: August 20, 2020

Theo sits down with Chelcie Lynn.https://www.instagram.com/chelcielynnn/-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------New Merchhttps://theo...vonstore.com -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------This episode is brought to you by…The Zebrahttps://TheZebra.com/THEO Betterhelphttps://BetterHelp.com/THEOModiphyhttps://modiphy.com/THEO -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Music“Shine” - Bishop Gunnhttp://bit.ly/Shine_BishopGunn -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Hit the Hotline 985-664-9503Video Hotline for TheoUpload here: http://bit.ly/TPW_VideoHotline -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Find TheoWebsite: https://theovon.com Instagram: https://instagram.com/theovonFacebook: https://facebook.com/theovonFacebook Group: https://facebook.com/groups/thispastweekend Twitter: https://twitter.com/theovonYouTube: https://youtube.com/theovonClips Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCiEKV_MOhwZ7OEcgFyLKilw-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Producer Nickhttps://instagram.com/realnickdavis See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 today's guest is a hilarious she makes me laugh she makes me feel good you know she's an uplifting gal and um and I'm just really just I mean I'm just tickled I am just tickled to have her it is comedian Chelsea Lynn can you imagine can you imagine a skull it between your legs I cannot and very few women get to know what that's like it's hot I'm sweating are you yeah well I'm large thank you yeah so I have an extra layer anyway so I get hot but yeah it's hot in here is your I know I've seen some of your family members that are more kind of a Rubinesque vibe do you feel do you is your family just kind of
Starting point is 00:01:20 a bigger family no no not at all I've got two sisters and an aunt and cousins and that's really about it everybody else is dead really yeah or just don't have relationships with them yeah you know yeah yeah yeah one or the other dang yeah um no my air conditioner went out yesterday so there's no air in here oh there's air I just turned it off made it colder oh you did just now it'll be good we'll just sweat the whole time yeah there's no but there's no rules to this the elastin is apartment yeah oh and it's been hotter than yeah this is like Texas heat yeah it's not used to this out here well it's bad and I just didn't know what to
Starting point is 00:02:08 do so I got a one of those floor fans and I put all took all the ice out of the freezer and put it right on the floor in front of it did it work like on a cookie sheet did it work that's supposed to work I think it did something but you're used to luxury yeah which is luxury and look it you know what you really I'll tell you this the second went an hour after it went out I was googling like Native American shit I'm starting to see yeah texting my mom I'm like aren't we part Cherokee or whatever I can't even handle you know just the lack of just yeah man just the comfort for real and damn I just feel bad Greg my
Starting point is 00:02:52 husband bitches about the electric bill cuz I run the air 24-7 yeah I keep it like 68 he freaks the fuck out yeah okay my step mom does that she's on pills though oh yeah that makes sense yeah if you're on pills dude yeah yeah I can't even do nothing goes with a Percocet like a little bit air condition you know that makes sense for sure but I'm sorry I interrupted you go on I don't even know what I was talking about but he so he you have the air conditioner going oh so that's what I that's what I spend my money on yeah is air condition I'm dead serious comfort last summer one of our bills was like $1200 for the yeah and I
Starting point is 00:03:30 was like I he threw a I was like I don't give a fuck yeah I'm comfortable yeah that's all that matters we're doing it yeah oh yeah if this is living large it's living large exactly I like that yeah and you guys live in San Diego San Diego yeah yeah cuz I saw you down there at the comedy store yeah that's the first time yeah I ever knew about you so here's what happened here's how I discovered you okay so I was like man I want to go see some comedy it's like let's let's take a look you know looked up the comedy stores going going through the schedule didn't really see anybody that I knew saw a picture of you go oh
Starting point is 00:04:06 he's cute as shit let me YouTube see see if you know I'm gonna see him first video I was like I'm buying fucking tickets start following on Instagram you had like 17,000 followers maybe dang yeah started following you I was almost damn shelter random when saw you you were so fucking funny and afterwards we're so fucking nice to me and my sisters I was like forever fan forever fucking fan man that's sweet and then yeah and then you blew up and now I'm on your podcast I'm freaking out I know it's so having me no I'm so happy to have you and I'm glad I mean I think we really lucked out even by having you on this week cuz I feel
Starting point is 00:04:49 like you're kind of having like a moment a little bit is that crazy to say that I know that sounds really no that's really a lot of people it's kind of coming out of the closet or whatever but this is like a like a yeah like I saw you on Michael Bisping's damn Instagram and I'm just like how are all these worlds collided damn British I went viral a couple days ago you know he's a one-eyed British man dude I don't know it's just I'm just roll I'm just rolling with it yeah day-to-day I have no idea what's happening I'm just like all right let's do this but you just hit a million on Instagram yeah you know what Instagram
Starting point is 00:05:24 hits different so I have a million on you on YouTube I know go sorry everywhere else I have a million I just started TikTok and got a million on TikTok in like two months and I posted like four videos and I'm just kind of okay million whatever I don't really care something about Instagram man I'm like I hit a million on Instagram I think it's harder to grow on Instagram people are stingy with that follow button yeah people a little stingy yeah I think especially the right like now I feel like people have been you know I feel like there's it's Instagram's been a while around for a while now yeah so it's not
Starting point is 00:06:01 you know people aren't just like oh yeah I'm get you know I'm in I'm following anybody you know I'll follow any you know the time I'll follow anybody with a damn kid yeah yeah I'll follow anybody that's not in a damn wheelchair you know I'm saying my requirements were very slim at a certain point right yeah now it's a little bit more you know yep exactly um but that had to feel good when did that happen when did you hit him two days ago two days ago and what were y'all doing where were you I mean this is your damn frickin electronic JFK right oh gosh just sitting on my couch in a moon moon just watching Date Line oh and I was
Starting point is 00:06:34 like oh I had a friend text me and he was like oh congratulations on me I'm like oh I knew what happened that day but I was like oh I get on them like hey look at that and that was pretty much it everybody's like hey gonna celebrate like celebrate like you know how people get balloons and shit yeah I made fun of it a while back and my sister was gonna get me balloons just to fuck with me and I was like you I'll pop them do not fucking get me congratulation balloons holy shit that's embarrassing do not I'll pop them dude they're almost is look I think if you're getting
Starting point is 00:07:06 congratulation balloons you weren't doing enough with your life I'm gonna go out on a damn live and say that because somebody needs to get you damn to show that sometimes it's just God I don't know you see some fucktard walk over with a pack of balloons in a damn you know and then my aunt one time like they have the little thing it's filled with it has a balloon another balloon that's filled with something confetti or yeah yeah candy yeah yeah and she would open that and it's saying nobody was just saying you know I'm saying it was just like saying she if you're buying a balloon in a balloon yeah you got money you got
Starting point is 00:07:50 money that's not a regular balloon you know yeah you definitely got money there but yeah that had to be so wild but that's not I was just like holy smokes like this is so crazy and it's so awesome that everybody starts to know about you yeah you know yeah it's super weird because you're so funny and do you feel like like you're funny comes from where like because you want to stand up to start with no no so how do you let's do your origin story damn it yeah where do you want to start Clark Kent start in the damn mail room yeah so you know I don't know where the funny comes from I think I had such a I guess a shitty
Starting point is 00:08:31 childhood that I kind of had to you know I was the poor kid in school I was the large kid in school you know so I had to have something yeah so I think that just like came out of me probably early junior high were you funny then yeah I think so I wish we had this video yeah yeah I know I was saying about that I was like man I wish we had I wish I could vlog back then oh my god to see that shit but um so funny where were you funny at like was there like an environment that you were kind of really shined in you know was it a particular place or you know certain group I know I've always remembered this and this may
Starting point is 00:09:09 be cheesy as hell but I remember the first time I made a room laugh and I was in seventh grade basketball practice and we after practice symbol basketball yeah oh yeah yeah and went back to the locker room everybody's getting ready for class right I don't even know what was said I have no clue but I had been to this school about a month so I didn't really know you know and I don't know what I said but the whole fucking locker room was pissing their pants and somebody goes she's funny and that always just stuck with me I'm like oh you know kind of so that was like the first time I remember like you know wow yeah
Starting point is 00:09:52 hmm yeah there's something that when you're saying that it makes me it takes me back to those times yeah like there's something magical when you don't feel like you have something that people that people see you know and then when they say that you're funny you're like oh yeah oh it's almost like thank God there's some I have some way yeah for people to see me you know do you ever say something do you ever say something and then somebody dies laughing and you didn't think it was funny but they thought it was the funniest thing they ever heard in their life that happens to me all the time I'm like I was I am not
Starting point is 00:10:28 that funny and they're like dying I well I think you start to become well some people start to become kind of there's times where I know I'm doing something funny and people don't know it yet mmm that's always kind of fun when like and it's not it's not that I'm doing it on purpose it's just I know my brain starts to see a pattern of like oh this is where they're at and this is where my brain is over here right now and so in a second this is all you know this corner is gonna turn or something yeah um sometimes though people like stuff like I'm one I watch when I watch your videos I notice a lot there's a little things
Starting point is 00:11:03 that I like like when your cousin Jim when that little fellow just turns his head at a certain angle and I just see the cut of that boy's damn where his neck just runs right in with them forehead I found that guy on Instagram I flew him out to do a bit I said you got to come do a video with me love that just the look and then I love him and so I think there's one thing that that really for me about you is that you're the people you find funny I find so funny that it's like oh wow I can trust her on different levels not only to entertain me but also like she sees like something that that a lot of people
Starting point is 00:11:49 maybe wouldn't see yeah you know I mean some people see this fellow little Jim and they might even you know somebody probably damn molesting yeah get a couple of damn you know yeah yeah for sure and they'll play them full back in a fucking haunted house with this dude you know but um but yeah I think that's one that that's one of the things I noticed as I'll see more your stuff that makes me laugh more I think is like trusting that you're gonna lead me also to something funny you know thank you and just the cuteness of it like the damn aunt and just the there's a whole storyline to it and it's all made up on
Starting point is 00:12:26 the spot man and I just roll with it I try to remember the storyline for future shit it's just it's just all fucking crazy it's so funny yeah such a good you do you do such a great job I think of just bringing joy especially during like the coronavirus time I feel like I've had such a tough time during all this of trying to like figure out what's funny or be like just be in the funny you know um do you feel like it's been tougher during this time or you feel like opposite opposite for me I feel like my my well my shit's been thriving since you know my creatives been thriving my just everything for
Starting point is 00:13:05 some reason just the total opposite for me yeah I'm supposed to go on tour oh you're gonna and you I don't know if you remember but like two or three years ago we did Josh Wolf Josh will show and do you remember me telling you I was like man I don't know I don't know if I wanted to stand up I'm kind of scared and you were like why and I was like I don't know and you're like just do it and I literally was like I left I was like yeah he's right and so I've literally started stand-up because of that oh wow yeah crazy you were like huh no just do it and I was like he's fucking right well I think some people it's
Starting point is 00:13:43 like you wanted you just want to listen to the person you you want to be a part of their world you know they're bringing the joy you know sometimes if people are selling jokes sometimes people are selling joy not really selling it but you know I just feel like people want to be in your world yeah and once you create like a world people want to be in it yeah so that's great then so you were planning on tour that's the thing I was gonna ask you so so was starting out you started out where at like just being funny where'd you grow up at Thackerville, Oklahoma okay it's about a 45 minutes north of Dallas it's right on
Starting point is 00:14:16 the Oklahoma Texas border okay I graduated high school with 12 people oh damn yeah 12 people we did not have a football team we did not have band we did not have art like nothing did y'all have like a bit like a youth group or something or religious yeah we had this thing called the upper room and my best friends family ran it damn yeah and that was that was all there was to do play play softball and go to the upper room and they just have like pool tables and and Christian rock you know I'm talking about yeah and that was it that was that was all I did for that was fun that was a social life oh yeah and it's
Starting point is 00:14:56 Thackerville a big place or no oh no we've got oh when I was there we didn't even have a stoplight now there's a stoplight because we have the world's largest casino oh yeah so it's random we have nothing but dirt roads one convenience store that's it and then the world's largest casino yeah well that's enough really I mean it's a that's the thing you know that's all you need you would yeah you would think that's all you need people want more yeah yeah people and some people need more man yeah um that's true so Thackerville see you graduated from there and then you went because I was kind of it was kind of
Starting point is 00:15:33 surprising when I saw you in San Diego because I'm like this doesn't seem to fit everything but everything works yeah but it was surprising to me so no well to me too so I graduated college married Greg okay we moved to Dallas so we were there for like three years he's looking for he was looking for a new job oh god I was working at Whole Foods at the time I was working at Whole Foods at the time in the bakery come home from work and he's like oh I've got a job interview I'm like that's great we're at and he's like it's this job in San Diego and I was literally like I thought he was fucking with me I'm like why did you apply for a
Starting point is 00:16:09 job in San Diego and he's like I didn't a recruiter reached out and I'm like we're not moving to San Diego that's called the military for real he's like yeah I'm gonna it's a it's a unique group you know that they've been in business for a couple hundred years they've reached out to me there's battleship opportunities so we moved to San Diego it's supposed to be temporary and once I got out once we got out here I was like I don't want to live anywhere else really yeah yeah and then that's when shit started to pop for me because that's a big move from a place where you have a the comfort and you guys especially going from like in the
Starting point is 00:16:50 Dallas that's a big move to go out west oh it was huge and then you get the shock of everything being more expensive out here which is so true I think I think our one-bedroom apartment was like 700 a month we come out here and it's like $2,200 for you know I mean we were like yeah it was a big shock we're used to it now when we when we moved to San Diego I had just started the social media stuff so I didn't really have a lot of followers and then it just slowly we've been we've been in San Diego seven years almost eight maybe yeah yeah it's flown by yeah yeah and uh and so with the social media so you do the characters
Starting point is 00:17:27 kind of but a lot of it always you always run into all of it it's always seems like a mix of you and the characters and just like a kind of a world kind of do you ever get like scared to try something new are there things that you get afraid to try oh yeah and not for me but because people get pissed you know I mean so I've years ago I tried to do a couple other characters besides trailer trash Danny and people go to this we'll go to this video right here just I don't mean to interrupt you know you're good but this you know we're trying to have Nick keep his job and so this is where he interjects good videos
Starting point is 00:17:59 I'm a big fan of you and all your videos I watch them every day also your moon brings my question is for you are you scared to see something really outrageous are so outrageous that people might take offense to it and you might get what we call cancel culture let me know bye oh my god she's cute I'm not like in terms of comedy not afraid to say anything like I'll joke about whatever so in that way I'm not I guess I'm not scared to but the cancel culture thing holy shit yeah you gotta I mean you got to watch like it's ridiculous I feel like you yeah that's on that's definitely always on the back
Starting point is 00:18:47 of my mind is yours I mean all my I didn't know all my friends were damn sex offenders you know until you know until Hollywood told me that they were you know it surprised me with that I think it here's when it gets scary for me so like I have a Netflix special that we're gonna do sometime in when the world opens back up so we have like a deal over there and trying to work on a cartoon right now and so I get scared of I know that those are the things that are at risk for me yeah so it's like I can you know I can say whatever I want to say but I have to sense those things are on the other side of the teeter
Starting point is 00:19:27 totter yeah if it were just my podcast and just social medias then I wouldn't I think I wouldn't there wouldn't be anything on that other side of the teeter totter deludes yeah but right now those are things where an article or something and then people get scared and in the podcasting world it's like you know some of the guys that something happens and then people are like well why don't they still do their podcast and well because the advertisers say we don't want to be on this podcast right now and so then you know they just get they get really nervous I guess as well you know but um right anyway so yeah
Starting point is 00:20:04 where does it where where does it hit with you oh gosh for me so anything political I don't mess with yeah for multiple reasons not really because I'm scared of the cancel culture thing but for me it's like you know I yeah I have a large platform and I've and very rarely will people message me and say you need to use your platform for this or that 99.9% of people message me and say thank you for not thank you for being a place where I can go and get away from that and laugh so that's the number one reason I love it why I I really you know try to stick with just comedy nothing to you know crazy political and and it's
Starting point is 00:20:46 not that I'm afraid of like the backlash or whatever it's just you know literally Dolly Parton is my you know and I'm just following her footsteps she really keeps it like you know I'm just here to bring entertainment bring laughs bring smiles I'm not here to you can go to another page for that shit yeah you know here we're talking about titties yeah saggy titties you know what I mean like that's all I'm here in bags baby exactly amen yeah something to hold a set of balloons down you know there you go you need a big titties something to hold down a set of damn get well balloons you get all titties do you'll
Starting point is 00:21:21 never get well no exactly dude I remember my mother had this smallest breast God forbid and I love her and she listens to this podcast which almost breaks my heart a lot of times but and makes my heart at the same time damn she had them small I mean you had to beat a little milk out of it so that's why I think I still got that nervous energy you know yeah baby trying to just feed off a small titty there's nothing yeah gotta to break your heart yeah you see a baby trying to you gotta work hard for that milk oh you can't even shake a small tit yeah but I heard somebody's bad without hurting somebody's bag it's just
Starting point is 00:22:00 a different place man for sure different place so sure but yeah you want one thing so then then I start to feel like this I start to feel like well as comedians you're also supposed to and this may be where maybe the line gets a little different for me coming from a background war of stand-up comedy is that you're supposed to be able to comment on things you're supposed to be able to at least be able to take a swing at things without you know without being judged just for taking a swing yeah and so that's where it gets tricky for me sometimes a stand-up because it's like you want to be able to kind of speak
Starting point is 00:22:41 out or push the boundaries or and then it really starts to feel real real limiting when your voice starts to get limited you know but but then maybe I say I'm like I just need to start to be more creative I start to you know I'm finally starting to land in that place instead of the place of oh this you know ah you know the frustration for see for stand-up comedy I feel like it's I feel like that's fine for sure to push that shit I'm worried about like oh an old tweet or if I say something in a vlog I really have and not that I go around saying shit that would get me canceled anyway I don't right I really don't but
Starting point is 00:23:21 you you have to like yeah you have to like watch that shit if you're if you're doing stuff not only on the stage does that make sense like oh totally you know like you if you put yourself out there everywhere stage YouTube vlogging snap chat like I mean it just grows bigger the possibility yeah yeah the possibility of more people getting offended as well yeah well it's this I mean what if ten years from now it's they have seeming lives matter you know and anybody that ever swallowed after a blowjob is going to jail you know I'm saying it's gonna make me think mm-hmm cuz we just don't know what the line is
Starting point is 00:23:55 gonna be in the future I know did you see my Instagram story yesterday I don't know if you did I I had a lady come to the house to give me a massage that I found on the internet oh god here's a crackhead okay and so I made a whole Instagram story making fun of her mm-hmm and telling them what happened she passed out during my massage but it's a whole thing mm-hmm and when you know people don't make fun of her right now yeah let's watch it and I literally said I'm gonna make fun of whatever the fuck I want to make fun of it's long but yeah yeah I decided to splurge and find someone to come to the house and give a
Starting point is 00:24:29 massage look I've been on this site and so is knit back page yeah all right P back page as well and now you have to do adult friend search but thankfully I blockers on my phone now so I'm doing well well that's not what I got let's see what you got I got a fucking crackhead amen photo was old she on crack now yes the bait and switch yeah she got me catfish yeah she got me you couldn't even really understand her when she talked oh y'all's born oh man but then she says she comes in and I'm immediately weirded out I almost tell her I'll pay her for her time but she's got a bounce I've done that before as
Starting point is 00:25:07 well dude I've been so scared I went drop the $300 off the balcony down to the woman holy shit kind of freaking just some kind of bootleg Marty girl some like fuck it let's just see what happens there we go that's what I like that entrepreneurial spirit then she tells me that she left her phone in purse in his car and she forgot to tell him when to be back she she she her car broke down so somebody dropped her off another crackhead oh yeah she's got that muscular pimp if she's out there give a massage is yeah as she can log into her Facebook somewhere and message him so you didn't take any pictures of her though no we'll
Starting point is 00:25:48 see now then I think that that's totally fine oh yeah I didn't post pic no no no you weren't blasted no no no no no but the story is hilarious she she fell asleep on me during my massage and was still massaging me oh yeah she passed out on me and was still massaging me and that's crack baby yeah that's crack I said I said are you good and she and she still laying on me goes yeah why I say cuz you're you're laying on me yeah and she goes oh yeah these are new clothes something a crackhead would say they just call it crackstruction dude so they said people that would do crack and they would come and build like in our
Starting point is 00:26:24 area they had a group of young men that would do crack and you'd see them out there zombied out but still building I saw a guy speaking of building I saw a guy on crack one time at a build a bear and he zoned out bro zero eyes open you know zero out of two eyes open and he's still in his bear and he still made that bad damn that's funny and he still made that bear didn't got the bow right in the middle he did it all even the little where you put the one two three on the feet yeah God he didn't pass out the whole time unconscious completely unconscious dude like if you put that dude right now in a court of law with the
Starting point is 00:27:06 hand one hand on the Bible or or even just a baron stained bears book you know whatever meant more to him and you asked him hey bugaboo you know did you ever build a bear unconscious I bet he would lie about it and he would lie unknowingly oh man you know that's good shit so what else we got some questions that came in yeah and I'm not giving up on my ability to conversate with you yet oh you're good okay good hey I'm having fun are you yeah I'm so glad you're here this is so thank you uh yeah I'm surprised people sent questions in that's that's great yeah we got a lot didn't we know yeah like 15
Starting point is 00:27:46 something some are like kind of the same old hapo yeah we got a lot for you okay what's up Tammy what's up the quick question what was your first experience with tobacco was it that cowboy killer or is it that smokeless lip filler gang gang nicotine buzz oh yeah and a fellow with a nice body there too bro yeah tank top beautiful young fella right there two arms yeah well I'm from that's a damn highlight one eyebrow oh you show up with two arms dog yeah he's cute yeah he's getting married this motherfucker bro you know oh I've never smoked have you smoked oh no no I mean I've tried it but I've never like
Starting point is 00:28:28 been a smoker oh yeah I'm a six months off of cigarettes right okay okay my grandma and parent everyone around me growing up chain smokers no so I you know as little kid would like try meh what did they smoke you what do you remember what kind well grandma had to get that jacket so Marlboro yeah yeah we were always decked out in Marlboro everything head to toe that's how much she smoked and you had a smoke like $20,000 worth of cigarettes to get a jacket yeah and we had closets full wow you know yeah those jackets yeah those are some prized pieces yeah all that it was the adults did the Marlboro's and
Starting point is 00:29:11 the children did those Kool-Aid points are on the back of the little Kool-Aid packets and we'd save up and get a picture every year we'd have a family meeting and we do what we wanted to do with the points you know man and we could get a little picture you could get a little one year we spent all of them got my little sister a damn vest doing that thing with a piece of shit oh it wasn't it wasn't nice I mean it was you think a vest would be nice you would think and damn it was just I don't know it was almost like a discontinued um life jacket you know that they were marketing his clothing no no they can't
Starting point is 00:29:48 do that they can they got you they got yeah they got you they got us but but yeah those Marlboro's and so your family would just smoke them oh yeah and what would you do just watch them yeah oh wow that was like we had no cable so what else we're gonna do you know let's watch grandma's cheeks turn you turn you know we had channels 10 and 12 we got tired of soap opera so we just sat there and watch them smoke what soap operas we all watching oh gosh we so watch like the days of our life just all that shit oh yeah that's literally that's all there was guiding light as yeah yeah we watched them all Santa Barbara that was an old
Starting point is 00:30:27 one my sister still watches them I haven't watched them since high school but she still watches them that's really interesting dedicated yeah that can really lead to loneliness as well yeah um here's a young lady right here that has a question Lauren Virginia love you both if you didn't like my last question here's another question Theo one time you said that you have like a nose power when you go into a public bathroom you can tell if someone just took a dump or not I think a lot of people have that power but what's worse than that is if you go
Starting point is 00:31:06 into the female bathroom after a girl who's currently going through the time of the month oh that smell is worse than poop Chelsea since you're a girl and you can attest to that tell Theo what's up plus you know because apparently your sister's got a little funky love you both thank you so much for being so funny and awesome bye oh dang so yeah um is that a real thing cuz I've always had this superpower and it's I mean I guess some people say it's not a superpower but if I go into a bathroom if someone has been doing poop in there I can tell immediately when I walk I can just smell in the hallway oh my god yeah oh yeah god
Starting point is 00:31:49 dude you might be a damn you might be from Egypt or something yeah so the whole female thing it it it smells like you walked into a room that has a pile of a million pennies oh my god like a bank like a little bad bank like a little like the back of the bank that holds all the coins oh yeah it's like a it's like a copper smell mixed in with some funk oh yeah so so y'all just have shit we have shit and blood oh so very very very kind of like Vietnam like yeah kind of if you think about it to him I never thought about that and so you know you when you walk in there you know if that's been going on yeah well here's
Starting point is 00:32:35 what here's the deal like they'll well that's that's why okay that's if she wore a pad and it's soaked up in fucking a gallon and then leaves it in the trash relax man at least drop it off at the fire department on the steps what is going on hey this is real life you did not know about this I didn't know about this man yeah women are disgusting I knew that but I didn't know that people are just abandoning yeah potential families yeah okay we on that little family pin yada I didn't know people are just abandoned in those things just curbside in the bathroom throw it out the window on the
Starting point is 00:33:25 interstate yeah a damn fucking adult oh my god I'm sorry y'all are going through that I didn't know that mm-hmm yeah that's why I'm quick to use the men's bathroom I'll just use the men's bathroom like I have no problem and the men's bathroom is usually empty mm-hmm and the women's is always full if there's a line I'll go to the men's I don't give a fuck well it's really you know it's really a strong move when you say that because nowadays if I see a woman in there I leave I don't want to be sex crime I don't want to be me to I don't want to be I'm just afraid of everything so it's like it's yours now you know
Starting point is 00:34:01 yeah right at W.O. on the fucking door no if it's like a big men's bathroom with like journals and stalls and there's other men like I won't like but if it's like a single you don't talk about like a gas station bathroom one and there's one you know and the women's is full I'll go to the men's but I won't walk in there and walk up beside a year and all and you know take up no no no but you know I'm talking about if it's like a single I'll use the men's I'll give a shit wow yeah mm-hmm I like that yeah and do you all have you guys ever been to the bathrooms at the Dallas Cowboys Stadium or not I've never been how are they I've never
Starting point is 00:34:30 been your husband's here and he didn't take you there no he hates the Cowboys oh damn but at least take her to the damn place that's true that's true what I'm saying dude I fucking hate a claim jumper but I've been to that bitch three times that's true yeah um no are they nice they are the biggest bathrooms I've ever seen there's four rooms before you get to anything that has water in it wow I mean that's good I mean there's no I'm sure the lines are non-existent yeah oh there's that I mean it's crazy it's just anyway just when you started talking about size of restrooms that really it took me to another level yeah
Starting point is 00:35:12 yeah we got to go babe y'all do no no no I meant to the stadium oh okay I ain't leaving you got to kick my ass out well we will about 45 minutes look that's just one room yeah can you see any other rooms Nick that is pretty nice that's nice that is cool not a lot okay maybe they won't let you tape it or they want to keep a secret yeah yeah yeah it but it is just it's really it's really high in it's like a magic castle of toiletry what's up what is so what's kind of like do you do you see yourself now like obviously you know you got a lot of people interested do you feel any new pressure do you feel do you feel anything
Starting point is 00:35:59 like that or do you feel pressure do you feel inspiration like what do you kind of feel if anything probably fear more than anything I don't feel pressure it's just a little scary to me and not in a bad way I'm not like you know it's just I don't know how to explain it like it's just it's weird you know what I mean like it's weird I never expected any of this you know fame scares me money scares me I'm I'm pretty happy and content so those things change people or can change people so I'm scared of that it's just all kind of like I'm trying to just does that make sense do you how do you feel about that yeah yeah I mean it's scary
Starting point is 00:36:50 to me it's scary yeah money's scary pop popularity is scary money's kind of scary because I feel like I never had any money and I don't and I just don't know I think I always judged people with money as well and so then when you start to make some money you're like damn those people were just you know I don't want to be the same way that I felt like those people were towards me maybe yeah but also just realizing like those people were just people probably trying to do their best yeah it's it's definitely kind of scary will people look at you differently yeah you know it's like especially coming from I feel like some
Starting point is 00:37:36 of the environments maybe you and I are from where you know it always the people with money were always kind of the bad guy felt like yeah maybe that's just my perception no I can definitely see that but rich people dude you went over to somebody's house and they had you know curtains you know and you're like these motherfuckers yeah yeah yeah no I was like I was like to say it's not even like where we're from it's not even like rich people it's like people that lived in like a three-bedroom two-bath brick house with a trampoline in the backyard was rich to me oh that was you had money yeah okay if you have a mini van parked
Starting point is 00:38:14 out front you have money dude if my this kid Brandon broke his fucking head open on a stack of bricks that were next to their trampoline and I was like you rich piece of shit because he had a stack of bricks and they were building something you had money yeah I was just like oh must be tough dude splitting your head open on some fucking high-end textiles your piece of shit yeah I do so yeah I think I had so much judgment sometimes against that whole universe that it makes me feel just way uncomfortable you know I still live in the same apartment I've been in for the past seven seven years and so I'm just
Starting point is 00:38:57 afraid sometimes to spend any money yeah I get scared I get scared to give nicker rays no I feel the exact same way I honestly do Greg drives a truck that has a half a million miles on it he refuses to get a new truck although he just bought a brand new fucking seventy thousand dollar Road Runner but Road Runner what is that oh like a Mopar Road Runner like a 69 Road Runner 68 let's get a picture of that yeah this sounds like but I mean something's all gonna split in the divorce yeah yeah the same thing like we're afraid to and you know I don't have a million dollars in the bank but I'm making more than I ever
Starting point is 00:39:40 have yeah oh that is beautiful it's blue too just like that oh no that is nice dude yep that's it that is something I'll frickin let you hickey my butt in that thing I thought you were talking about that thing at Brennan saw me to drive that damn look like a big mosquito yeah that's nice that's beautiful yeah we just splurged wow and is it run yet do you guys have it running yeah it's a race car so he doesn't drive it yeah it's been sitting in our driveway for eight months so what is it about on being down there and say oh wait you don't drive it at all yet no not that that's that's that's not street legal
Starting point is 00:40:17 okay yeah so what'll make it street legal he won't he's gonna take it to the he's gonna take it to the strip start racing it hell yeah and that'd be great for some Tammy videos dude I would like to go sit in one of those yeah I want to be there it'll be fine I want to be just that like I want to be medieval Keneval you know what I'm saying I want to be on a dirt bike but with a damn Lance and with that mullet yeah oh yeah let the Lord frickin work yes yes um what is it you feel like about being down there in San Diego and in that area I really like it because it's still California but it's not LA I don't know
Starting point is 00:40:57 if I could live in LA yeah yeah oh yeah um oh just the weather I know that's stupid to say but like you know Texas was miserable and you're hardly ever miserable in San Diego the taco shops it's just I just love it I don't think it would take a lot to get us to move I think if we were to move anywhere else it would be Austin yeah Austin area which you know we're going back to the heat but I love the Austin area but I'm I think we're gonna be here for the rest of our lives hopefully San Diego wow I just love it and do you guys have offspring are y'all fertile or anything like that no we're fertile okay so
Starting point is 00:41:36 that's a choice yeah yeah no thanks no thanks for now maybe I don't know I keep saying oh in five years we've been married oh my gosh 11 years and I'll say oh let's wait three or four years and come back and see and then every three four years we're like no no and let's wait three you know so and then now my career's kind of taken off so I'm like I don't know I won't be like if we don't have kids I don't think either of us are gonna be like oh man we miss we should have now I'll be good now which would you freeze a batch of them eggs you think now that freaking cuz I think cold Easter you know start that thing up for
Starting point is 00:42:14 me I'm thinking if it happens it was meant to be if it doesn't it's not so I'm not gonna go out of my way you know I know yeah yeah you know what I mean like I don't know I've never had so I've never had like a strong desire to have kids okay and I'll and I've always said I won't until that happens you know I used to work with this old lady and she asked me if I had kids I said no and she said well let me tell you this don't have kids just because you feel like you should have cuz it'll make it harder have kids if you want kids I was like that's that's so true and so I've I've never felt the strong need to get that
Starting point is 00:42:55 batch yeah but hell in five years I might I don't know so I'm gonna wait until that happens and if it never happens all good I hate to interrupt the bonanza but sometimes you got to get your brain re ignited recalibrated really and something that will help you is a company called BetterHelp you know I've suffered from mental health issues mental disorder probably you know I wake up in the morning and I don't want to do it and I don't even care what it is and when I need help sometimes I don't you know there's not a place I can go there's not a therapist I can drive to or there's not you know somebody there's not
Starting point is 00:43:37 somebody in my area you know I might live in a rural area well that is all changing thanks to BetterHelp BetterHelp will assess your needs and match you with your own licensed professional therapist I mean you can access them on your phone you can access them over FaceTime you can access them over text there's a broad range of expertise in BetterHelp's counselor network which Nate which may not be locally available in many areas it's not a crisis line it's not self-help it is professional counseling done securely you'll get timely and thoughtful responses plus you can
Starting point is 00:44:16 schedule weekly video or phone sessions so you won't ever have to sit in an uncomfortable waiting room as with traditional therapy it's it's time for a change in therapy it's time that everyone should be able to get help and this is how visit betterhelp.com that's B-E-T-T-E-R-H-E-L-P and join the over half a million people taking charge of their mental health with the help of an experienced professional that's right a special offer for this past week and listeners get 10% off your first month at betterhelp.com slash T-H-E-O if you need help don't be afraid don't be ashamed and get it now
Starting point is 00:45:03 back to the episode it has been reported and I'm sadly to share it with you that Americans are overpaying on car insurance by over 21 billion dollars what honk honk hold up I got traffic in my brain suddenly that's right Americans are overpaying on car insurance by over 21 billion dollars but searching for a better deal for car insurance it can take hours and typically results in a barrage of unwanted spam calls who's this I don't know I just I was on the website and now this until now things have changed thanks to the zebra.com the zebra.com is the nation's leading car insurance comparison site it's long
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Starting point is 00:46:46 is too valuable save on car and home insurance as well if you need it go today and start saving at the zebra.com slash teo you're gonna get car insurance support the podcast that's the zebra.com slash teo the zebra.com slash teo thank you do you do you get up like do you have like a daily routine kind of are you kind of go by the wayside like just whatever you know kind of I do have a daily routine and I have to or I won't do shit I won't do shit if I don't have like my week planned out my day-to-day so just I'm gonna film this day I'm gonna post this day I have you know phone calls this day
Starting point is 00:47:36 I have everything and then my nieces live with this so now I'm homeschooling them know how old are they as a week eight and ten oh my god are they smart yeah they are they start they start this week so I'm doing that three days a week no and you're giving lessons and everything yeah what kind of stuff are they learning about well it's a lot of like just math and shit I'm gonna teach them I'm kind of gonna gonna go out of the box I'm gonna teach them how to cook at a grocery shop stuff like that yeah I mean cuz so many damn adults don't know how to cook like they're my sister who lives with us holy shit can you make
Starting point is 00:48:11 spaghetti dude really yeah that's heartbreaking yeah and I you know I cook and so I'm like you're all gonna learn how to cook yeah even if they were boys I would teach them how to cook oh it's such a skill man yeah dude yeah even if we all you make every night is macaroni and cheese you're gonna learn how to do it you know we're split up an apple or so exactly you know I remember we used to do like my mom would work and so we would make whatever you know we had at the house so we'd always come up with some real bad ideas and shit and make it like more we should do macaroni with marshmallows I think we went
Starting point is 00:48:45 through a little phase of that shit and it was and you ate that yeah yeah we ate it well here's the thing once you made it you got to eat yeah oh yeah yeah you can't throw it away no there wasn't a lot of wiggle room but the thing is did you make it a second time and a third well here's what happens somebody would make it one of the kids would make it we have four children one of them would make it then the other three would try to up outdo them you know with their bullshit idea and my one of my sisters at the time was five so she would just fucking burn all kinds of shit and then we would fight you know yeah oh you got
Starting point is 00:49:16 to fill in a fight there oh yeah can't not fight but I really enjoyed that yeah um when you see so you have a lot of interaction with like a lot of different celebrities and stuff it seems like that have reached out to you is all that been organic I know you had the the haha the fan attack video with Luke Brian that was really really crazy and his mother one of the best moments ever dude so I have never ever reached out to a celebrity that's all been them coming to me and why don't a judge follows me that's what I feel that out there yep so anyway yeah so a little backstory on this so they contact me Luke and his wife
Starting point is 00:50:02 they call me like cuz I supposed to go this charity event they call me like a week before he's like hey I want to try to prank my mom like I'm thinking about if you attack me and I'm like yeah that's that's great that's hilarious let's do it he reached out yeah out of the blue yeah so he messaged you as if he is somebody who works with a message his wife had his his wife follows me on Instagram okay so we follow each other and they call yeah they invited me to their charity event and then him and his wife FaceTimed me like a week before I was supposed to go out there he's like I have this idea it's romantic yeah so I
Starting point is 00:50:35 get there I'm thinking it's just gonna be just as simple oh yeah he goes so security's out front and I've been telling my mom my mom all morning that there's a crazy fan out there and that she's threatening to kill us and I go hold on so this is like is she gonna make sure she doesn't have a gun yeah like cuz I didn't know he was gonna like tell her that I was threatening to kid so that so his mom was scared right she's on alert before yeah yeah this is her son this is the dang meal ticket yeah yeah kill mother son yeah kill Randy Bryan set a bear trap on the third hole for Randy but she was set up to be
Starting point is 00:51:21 scared of me okay so I'm like oh my god are you sure he's like no it's gonna be great I can make sure cuz you know she's from the south I don't know if she you know make sure she's not packing he goes we've we've made sure so apparently she does I don't know yeah he goes we've made sure I said okay and that's something nice about a older person you could fruit like it's it you can feel easy if they got a gun on yeah cuz there's not as much body there's not as much body on yeah and she was super skinny too so you can yeah quickly you can give her a big hug and double over like that next thing you know you've done a full body
Starting point is 00:51:51 search but we did the prank and I thought she was gonna I mean I felt I instantly thought I shouldn't have done this yeah I shouldn't have done this at what point let's go through a little bit of it okay and is it is it hot in here isn't it a little bit I'm feeling a little better you are okay I put it down to 70 you did yeah a little sweat right oh thank you thank you thank you yeah yeah look very nice thank you okay so you sneak in okay so you sneak in okay so you yeah and then right there as soon as I stand up I'm like oh my god oh there's mom holding her back yeah
Starting point is 00:52:53 and look at that wow it all comes to a head right there mom saves the day oh yeah shows that she's still got that mother wolf in her you know oh yeah afterward she was like I was gonna whoop your ass and she was gonna to oh she was to whoop ass you see her throw the six yet she go yeah she was ready she's throw that shit like she was warming up like she was swollen Ryan do like she was about to pitch some fucking right in your face that was fine that was fun that's awesome yeah um so do you feel like that world kind of embraces you though the like kind of the country music world do you feel because I feel like
Starting point is 00:53:43 every you're just so I feel like you're for everybody do you feel like it's specific no I feel like I'm for everybody yeah I have a from everywhere from all I mean every ethnicity I think people assume that only you know white southern people follow me and no no no that's not true I feel like I'm for everybody because everybody loves redneck humor yeah have to be a redneck to enjoy that you know it's fucking funny well a lot of it's just relatable even if you're looking at your YouTube and it's going through the drive-thru and just you know you know the people snacking on different stuff and
Starting point is 00:54:23 experiencing it and just to be in that moment also going through the drive-through with somebody a lot of times yeah you get your behind a couple cars do this shit gets you it's some damn intimacy because you're just chilling there that's the biggest commitment I've ever made sometimes is being three cars deep in a drafter with it with somebody I don't know very well sitting there waiting together god you know those drive-thru videos are my most popular and most requested videos which blows my mind yeah because I'm just sitting there eating dude yeah have you watched that have you seen the muckbangs on on YouTube
Starting point is 00:54:58 I've seen some of them I like the donut one that you and Jim did when you all stacked those different types of meals so here's how that started like a couple years ago mukbang it's called mukbang or something I don't say that word because it's stupid it's a mukbang right okay they started getting like people were getting millions and millions of views and making money and I'm like and I said this is the dumbest thing I've ever seen you sit there and watch someone eat I thought it was ridiculous yeah I go let me do one as Tammy to basically make fun of it and so I only planned on doing one so I did one it's my most viewed on
Starting point is 00:55:37 YouTube people would not let me not do another one and it's it's my mode if I go a week or two without doing one my DMs are like when's the next month I'm like you just it's it's so funny it's so easy it's easy content I just go through the drive-thru yeah it's all improv I talk about whatever I make shit up and eat yeah and that's it it's beautiful man you gave that poster I love that I also love it's just like I think it just feels it obviously like it's produced your shit you know it's like you guys are doing it but it just feels I don't know it just feels fun I'm trying to think of what really makes me get into it you
Starting point is 00:56:17 know I'm trying to think of what makes me cuz it's ridiculous it's almost it's almost like watching a car wreck I think it's no because for me sorry like for me it is because I just have been in that situation so many times and never like just been in a moment like that and you're like yeah this is actually kind of close to what shit is like when you're just kind of with somebody yeah you know and you have to decide on food and you display your best chance to display your manners on a damn date sometimes is it the you know when the drive-thru lady says what can I get you you know and you get to see if the person is nice or not
Starting point is 00:56:50 if they say yeah thank you yeah yeah so I think some of that just seeing it just feels real human yeah relatable yeah I feel real relatable people love them do you think about doing like a something that's more in the acting world I know you've had some stuff go on but do you think about that kind of are you kind of happy with the space that you're in I'm happy with the space I'm in but and if I don't go beyond that I'll be so happy and content but yeah I'm I'm trying to write a tiny tiny movie right now so we'll see if that ever gets made or happy you know you know how shit goes like you know but I'm trying to write a
Starting point is 00:57:30 tiny movie got some stuff kind of going on the work so hopefully that'd be great but if it doesn't I'm good you know what I mean yeah but I'm just taking a day of time and I'm you know opportunities I'm like let's let's try it let's do it yeah yeah it's great yeah I would I'm trying to think if I have a opportunity and something I'm doing I would I would certainly include you you know thank you yeah I think it would just be fun that'd be great what kind of thing could we what kind of even think what kind of characters could we be you think and I'm not playing Tammy you can do whatever we if I make a movie you just be alive if
Starting point is 00:58:10 I if I make a tiny movie you got to make a cameo in the Tammy movie oh I'm not doing oh a cameo yeah I'm just not paying somebody I'm not doing a damn birthday party for somebody for $9 you just got to be you just got to be in the movie oh I'll stop in that bitch yeah you know but I want a real role I want to be a damn you know somebody that runs and works at a gift shop or somebody that you know somebody that fixes something I want to be somebody that knocks on a door and shows up yeah you want to play an important part and you should yeah that's what I'll do it dude yes God that's what I want yes well
Starting point is 00:58:48 it's a great time and we're happy and on the website if you go to Theo Vaughn com it's been refurbished and rehashed reimagined and creative eyes and who's helped us well they're called modify modify is a web design and development group that offers game-changing service providing a subscription based professional web design for the cost of your old cable bill why would you want to do it yourself or pay top dollar for less value modify will design your site it's unbeatable plan is fast affordable and high quality with 20 years in the website design game modify's last website ever plan is the best option out
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Starting point is 01:00:33 the $249 a month at modify.com slash Theo that's M-O-D-I-P-H-Y dot com slash T-H-E-O that's modify with a P-H-M-O-D-I-P-H-Y dot com slash T-H-E-O these guys don't f around gang what else is going on not much dude I freaking left some stuff out on the counter at home would you leave out I left some blueberries and I left a damn London broil the blueberries will be okay what's a London broil it's a meat it's like a kind of a high-end kind of meat I guess or medium-end and it's raw yeah oh it's that may be done for just because the heat and the no air yeah oh you gonna take a loss on that one yeah it just
Starting point is 01:01:24 hurts a little yeah at least you got the blueberries London broil I've never heard of that it's good man it's the best thing Britain ever did for us it looks like a skirt steak some yeah yeah you know it's a little more I feel like it's a little more bought like there's not a lot of taste to it it looks kind of great but there's not a lot of taste to it kind of like oh it's very bright it's as British as you could get wait but it says grilled steak served cut diagonally so it's just the cut oh really so it's just a regular steak it's just how it's cut right but they cut it out of a place that definitely is English as fuck I
Starting point is 01:02:03 feel like it like when I'm eating it as compared to like a brisket or something it doesn't stand up okay no that makes sense that makes sense because if you're eating a brisket you're not thinking about Paris France no you're thinking about Texas okay that okay makes if I'm having a brisket I'm thinking about wherever I am at that moment um what was that what's in the news Nick we'll get into a couple of news topics what do we got X Navy Seal credited with killing Osama bin Laden he was people got angry with him on Twitter because he was bragging about not wearing a mask he took a selfie with a marine behind him
Starting point is 01:02:42 or a guy in a marine cap who had a mascot and he goes I'm not a pussy like this guy and risky and then risky to tweet about it yeah that's brave to tweet about it almost wonder if he was tweeting out of like trying to get back at the guy I think it's the rivalry between seals and Marines oh I could see a little bit of that yeah okay okay well this goes really in a recently I saw a dang man in the and a Marines had and I thought it said Mariners on a Seattle Mariners and so I'm asking him about Ichiro and you know all of these different guys and King Griffey Jr. and all this shit and the guy is looking
Starting point is 01:03:21 like and it said Marines and not Mariners he looks at me like I'm a damn still-in-school adult you know I think if you kill bin Laden dude I don't think you got to wear it I don't think you have to wear a mask I don't think that dude needs to wear a damn shirt if he doesn't want yeah I don't care if he wears damn two dicks to a urinal this dude killed Osama bin Laden oh that's him that's him oh I see okay okay and also this guy seems semi ginger you know how hard it is for a ginger to sneak through the damn through you know where it gets I mean he gets pretty you know that's more of a tan environment over
Starting point is 01:04:06 there in the desert oh yeah everybody's got a tan oh yeah so you're just gonna lolly gag through with a damn you know with that damn torch skin torch skin I mean I just don't know if this guy needs I mean he should wear a shirt that said hey I'm not wearing a mask because I killed Osama bin Laden yeah oh I think for me I feel like he gets out of jail free yeah and I don't I mean I wear a mask just to I guess respect other people but if oh totally if someone comes if I'm in the grocery and someone's not I'm not I don't say anything or freak out no no I'm not a man yeah I'm not some kind of mask warrior no no yeah we're not the
Starting point is 01:04:48 mask police no I'm not the mask police I'm not even a man I don't want to be I'm not even a damn mask parole officer yeah like I have certain feelings about the whole pandemic and everything but I wear a mask it's like somebody it's like shaking somebody's hand when you meet them and if you feel comfortable after that if people choose not to then that's between them yeah I think between consenting adults almost kind of agree but I think it's for me this guy killed bin Laden I think this dude doesn't have to wear damn shoes and we're fricking 7-eleven if he doesn't want to don't say nothing he can go high on the hog as he
Starting point is 01:05:25 wants agree Nick what do you think yeah yeah I agree I he should be able to do whatever he wants not wear the mask I'm really worried about this though Uber and Lyft might shut down in California on Friday because they're trying to make all the drivers be employees instead of independent contractors so they're just gonna withdraw they're threatening just withdraw from California and just shut down and there won't be Uber and Lyft in California Friday why wonder why just in California because it's California state that is trying to protect the employees or independent contractors and make employees but if they shut down
Starting point is 01:06:03 then it's hurting everybody wow and that's the only place I Nick Frequence yeah yeah yeah he had a car and then he well it's your story Nick I don't want to throw you under your own car tree a tree fell on it during a windstorm it was like first nice car I ever bought and a tree fell on it and totaled it and then the only windstorm and the only tree I was gonna ask was that here in LA yeah it was the night of the Super Bowl they actually said 2,000 trees were cleared from Los Angeles that night there was oh yeah I slept right through it what's what's taking so long with insurance nothing I got paid out for yeah I got
Starting point is 01:06:46 and then the pandemic happened but then I don't know Uber's actually I like it yeah it's so convenient like it that sucks I like it but I just sometimes I get damn judgmental when I'm in there and I just I will in my head I'll have like a stack of dimes that I'm given as a tip you know hypothetical dimes and each time they do something a little that doesn't really meet my fancy I guess like what I will okay smack in their gum okay yeah a lady gave me a ride from here to home and smacked her gum so much that I had to go see my therapist that week and that is a hundred percent true and that's still I can still hear her
Starting point is 01:07:31 smacking and it was just irrational how much she did it yeah and another thing talking to me about a lot of different stuff no you're right you're right I don't want to talk at all yeah I'd like and if they talk but I'll make it yeah yeah no you're right on that one and it's hard to curtail that conversation you know yeah yeah do you ever do you ever have people ask you that don't know who you are oh what do you do yes do you hate it or do you like it because I hate it I I hate it now yeah okay I think there was a time and I liked it what do you tell them I say I work in it I work in entertainment you know I do we do
Starting point is 01:08:14 outreach I've said I'll do animal outreach have some basic kind of lies I'll tell you know I work for the city you know you know you know or I'll do unemployment I'll do you know I'll say that a lot of times or if it's somebody that I feel like is if it's somebody that's not gonna talk much that's how I gauge what answer I get same if I can feel that they're gonna because when you say comedian or you say youtuber or whatever you say if I if I know that they're gonna be like oh let me put you know what I mean I'll make something up yeah but if it's someone that I usually say like social media marketing which
Starting point is 01:08:53 I don't even know what that is yeah but I tell people that I like like oh like what I'm like just like Facebook and Instagram but I hate it when people ask me what I do and I don't know why I think it's because they do like once you tell them they like want to look you you know I mean they make a big you know so yeah one guy's playing me a thing of mine one time while he's driving I'm like this is insane you know so that really you know that's unfortunate do you have this instance where if you are with somebody and they don't it's kind of uncomfortable sometimes if people are giving you attention and they're not
Starting point is 01:09:30 giving it to somebody else that you're with which they wouldn't probably because they don't know that person or they're not a fan of them I always feel so uncomfortable because I'm like man I don't want my friend to not feel good or not feel like or feel like I'm more important than them you know like when you get recognized yeah that makes me feel yeah if I'm with like my you know family like my sisters or like my close close friends that are like used to it I'm fine but if I'm with someone that's like you know never like for instance I was in Nashville before the pandemic and I was visiting some college friends we
Starting point is 01:10:04 went out and I had people recognize me and it it's awkward when they're just kind of standing there like you know and you know I'm saying like it's it's it can be very awkward you're right like when they're not giving anybody else attention and they're kind of making a big deal about you but yeah you feel some type of way a little bit you start to develop this sixth sense though I know when I walk in a room I can tell like who knows who doesn't how this is all gonna play out like you start to get and it's not an ego thing it's just it's like you've done you've been through this little drill so many times you start
Starting point is 01:10:35 to just you develop a sixth sense you develop you develop okay this person know I can feel them they're telling this person this guy's not gonna say anything but he I feel like he knows I wish this bitch knew you know cuz I always get some real muckbangs that know a lot of closeted men are always hollering at me really yes it's crazy like guys want to go on a damn walk or something go on a walk just easy just you need to get some fresh air but unless one of us is a murderer you know what else we got in the news Nick see what else you really keep up with the news like you know not a ton I stay off
Starting point is 01:11:26 these days it's yeah I don't trust it anymore yeah it wants me to not have fun yeah exactly I'm kind of the same way one thing that gets me though I feel like we need a damn centralized mask like I mean people are wearing yeah you know somebody cut out part of a hat and tape it over their face you know you've got another guy some guy shows up and you think he's a surgeon and he fucking works at Best Buy you know what I'm saying there's so many you have a guy in a damn Scream 3 mask like there's like how there's no protocol for yeah unleash a mask that everyone needs yeah did you see that viral mane going around just a
Starting point is 01:12:07 few days ago there's a guy with a long beard he had it tucked up up and under his sunglasses and he was using his beard as a mask that's pretty cool I would do that that was pretty cool yeah this one guy had his hand amputated and he saved it and he got it put in front of his and it hung it on two damn little door hooks yeah it's just beautiful to see a lot of stuff that's going on I saw it on Instagram but it's like put a centralized mask out you got people just had goddamn half a panty in front of their head you know I'm saying and are they serious I don't know they can't be you can't be and that but it but it
Starting point is 01:12:50 qualifies that's the thing it's funny it's like oh as long as you walk in you know as long as you have something yeah right there and it could be fucking anything you're good come on in yeah that's what's so crazy to me I'm not a doctor fuck I'm not even an exterminator but I'll tell you this dude just anything in front of your mouth that that's not a real that's not a plan doesn't even have to be cloth as long as it's connected behind your ears fucking anything dude oh dude that one guy had a strong enough overbite and they're like that qualifies anything you'll have a fellow just just comb his bang straight
Starting point is 01:13:38 out across his face oh bang face yeah he's healthy get him in here and then you got some 60-year-old man in a damn raggedy Andy mask over there fucking drinking Purell out there just like wow is there's no protocol no no I've never thought about that till you brought it up that you're right like gosh Nick bring up the anti-maskers league if you can know I didn't know about this well this is something let's take us here Nick what is this do you want the anti-mask league we'll go right here marijuana vending machines are now available in Colorado with Colorado with more to follow yeah and do you guys do marijuana
Starting point is 01:14:23 in that I feel like I I was like 28 the first time I ever smoked weed oh yeah I used to on occasion and it started giving me panic attacks where were you at when you smoked it first with you with your man or what oh my gosh I think yeah we were living in San Diego move San Diego when I was 26 so yeah at the house and introduced you do it was it you was it him was it I've always been around people that smoke okay so I think we had a roommate I came I don't even know man but smoked it loved it laughed my ass so it was one of those great laughing you know so I do it like once or twice a month great had a great time
Starting point is 01:15:03 for maybe two three years and then boom panic attacks no matter what I saw I smoked CBD now cuz I still like the smell mm-hmm so I'm just a CBD here okay yeah I feel like it calms you a little yeah oh yeah it works and I don't feel like somebody's gonna murder me yeah yeah yeah honest to God I remember the worst the worst time I ever got paranoid during it smoked weed went to bed and I was positive that Greg was gonna kill me like no like I thought he's gonna murder me tonight it was so real and he came in that he came in the bedroom oh which is the first sign of somebody's gonna murder you they come into the room
Starting point is 01:15:41 in a dark room he comes in I'm like oh my god how's he gonna do it does he have a gun is he gonna strangle me yeah what's he gonna do and he walks over to my side of the bed like I'm literally my heart I'm literally like oh god I'm gonna I'm gonna die I mean and this was real dude yeah in your head yeah it's real and he leans over and goes good night baby and gives me a kiss I go he's fucking faking it he's gonna wait till I fall asleep and he's gonna do it and I did not sleep that night into the morning and I woke up I was like I need to not smoke weed anymore yeah and I yeah I don't smoke anymore not crazy yeah but also some of
Starting point is 01:16:19 his behaviors yeah yeah some of that shit is a dead giveaway do when you're high you're like oh this motherfucker's gonna kill me and the next thing you know they go and take a sip of water and you're like oh yeah yep just hydrating up this damn murderer you know I feel you bro we don't do that um what about do you ever I feel like I remember one time getting so high and going to a damn funeral and I thought I just oh and I was laughing it gave me the day and it was just like can you believe everybody's tripping out dude just cuz mr. Polito is dead did nobody even like this guy like half these people are pretending I'm
Starting point is 01:17:04 fucking laughing and then I'm starting to think yeah I started getting paranoid and thinking that people somebody was a murderer because it looks like a damn crime scene when you're at a funeral yeah yeah it's like a who done it yeah I can see that when you're hot a funeral it is a straight up who did you thank you and be a good experience uh there was just weed going through the area okay and you happen to and I happen to have a funeral in the docket but it was a I would never do it again man oh that's a crazy thing about weed dude it's just it can be either fucking amazing and the best or can bring so much fucking fear
Starting point is 01:17:43 like oh my gosh it's one or the other and I don't get it yeah it's like back page for your DNA it's like meeting somebody off the internet yeah you never know what you're gonna get yeah you might get murdered you might get not murdered yeah you know it's one of the other yeah um this was something that happened this is in uh take us through a little bit of this Nick the anti mask league of San Francisco was an organization formed to protest the requirement for people in San Francisco to wear masks during the 1918 pandemic yes so they had a man yeah they had a group of people and actually there's a
Starting point is 01:18:17 New York Times article if you if you try and look that up real quick so basically they had something very much like what we have now where people didn't want a lot of people didn't want to wear masks a lot of people did want to wear masks there was people getting ill and there's people on the street the police would even give you fines like if you didn't have a mask on you could get a fine for like five dollars up to twenty five dollars that was a lot back then oh yeah it was a it was a just damn damn half of a but low dude if you're doing a damn gender reveal and you're it's your friend Paige it was half a
Starting point is 01:18:52 damn BL the first infection go down a little bit there they are was identified in March at army base in Kansas by the fall of 1918 seven cities had put in effect mandatory face mask laws and the masked city San Francisco became known as the masked city because of this pandemic and people didn't know how to wear them oh and somebody yeah somebody shot somebody eventually because they weren't wearing a mask yeah on October 28 a blacksmith named James Wisser stood on Powell and market streets using a crowd to urging a crowded dispose of their masks and somebody hit him with a sack of silver damn that'll get you yeah
Starting point is 01:19:44 shitty way to go you always want to make money and then bam that shit gets you right in the chin um but anyway yeah I mean this is somebody died nobody's killed anybody yet for not wearing a mask or wearing one I don't think I don't think so so we're still in good space there yeah you know compared to how it had been I mean people really were losing it wow um do we have any other questions that came in Nick that was pretty much it for the questions okay all right well dang cool dang um what are y'all gonna do what do you feel about this
Starting point is 01:20:20 coming up like the holidays in Halloween have you started thinking about that at all well every year we have a big Halloween party you do oh yeah and and there's nobody there that I know it's all like because I don't really know anybody in San Diego I really don't like all my friends are up here in LA and stuff so it's like my friend it's like my sister's like employee like work employee like work what do you call co-workers co-workers at a bank or something no no sure if they work at a plumbing like a plumbing office oh yeah whatever so it's just about the plumbers um but anyway there's always like a ton
Starting point is 01:20:57 of people like it's one of those things where people invite people to where I don't know who's there but anyway it's always a big fun time we look forward to every year we start decorating like a month before and we're probably not gonna have it this year yeah but we'll still have fun you know what I mean but it seems like such a time when masks you need masks it's almost you know everybody has a mask on it's the one party you can have that's I didn't think about that you're right kind of I mean I'm not calling you out for not having it yeah I just want you to damn have it yeah I know you know even though I stay home all
Starting point is 01:21:31 the time I fucking love knowing yeah that somebody's having a Halloween party that people are having a good time yeah that's true that's true I think we were gonna try to still have something but not just just invite like us and the immediate friends not not all the people but we'll still have something but yeah that kind of sucks but and you also get the judgment from social media if you know if I were to have that big Halloween party oh gosh yeah you know you got the people on your ass but I think we're just gonna have something small and then we're going home for Thanksgiving which is the first time in
Starting point is 01:22:05 like eight years you leave back to Thackerville or no yeah we'll do rant which is close so it's like well but yeah so we're doing that my sister's 30th is after Thanksgiving so we're renting a cabin in Oklahoma oh fun I love Oklahoma yeah well certain parts we went to Tulsa and we went to the ball okay yeah yeah there yeah so mm-hmm and it was I like it up there it was a great show yeah I like it up there when you do your live show what is it like what do you do actually um so what I did before the pandemic was I would come out as me and do like like 10 minutes or so and I would thank everybody for coming and
Starting point is 01:22:48 they think that was it and it got so awkward that people were pissed I'd be walking to the crowd and they're like like I paid you know like pissed and then I would come back out as Tammy yeah and that's when it really really took off oh yeah I'm thinking though for the future shows like I'm just gonna do Tammy and I almost only did the Chelsea stuff just to see if I could do it as me and I can but it's more comfortable doing it as Tammy is it oh yeah oh yeah it's more comfortable I feel like the materials funnier mm-hmm although everything I I say is true and happened to me but I tell it as Tammy oh yeah yeah and what
Starting point is 01:23:28 about that little little gym at little sugar Calamari won't you bring him out oh god he lives God I would love to see him at something well he's busy he works at he's assistant manager of the Dollar General no he isn't in what city oh gosh where's he I know he was in Georgia some little town outside of Macon I can't remember it but I love Dollar General oh yeah he's he's he's running the place well a lot of people don't realize Dollar General if you live in a small area rural area Dollar General is it it will be like the Walmart yeah for three towns or four towns you go to wherever the the Dollar General be the quote the place
Starting point is 01:24:03 that everybody goes kind of for every day yeah I realize that God fucking pisses me off dude it really dollar general is like popping in in small towns yeah they know what they're doing yeah they're making money and they're good yeah look at Dollar General stock pull it up and I know it probably hadn't done well in this during this pandemic but prior to that I feel like that that's this is a hot time for me yeah well I guess if they're shut down well if they're still open let me see them over the past two years let me look at yeah give me a two year five year Nick they're open there's there's one year see I mean that's a
Starting point is 01:24:38 money maker yeah they're making money dear god yeah nothing but rising where else can you judge your fucking neighbors and get a damn broom yeah and some and some Dollar General hot pockets yeah not the hot pocket brand no Dollar General and it feels like military essence that has general in it you know I think a lot of men don't mind going yeah it's got that kind of vibe yeah I just had a vision that one day Dolly Parton comes on and you come on and guest hosts that episode because I'm gonna be getting a studio in Nashville starting on September 1st really yeah if you do that can you let me know I'm letting you
Starting point is 01:25:22 know oh if she's gonna do it yes yeah that's gonna be a goal I'm gonna set or if you're doing it and I can come and walk it doesn't matter it doesn't matter and I see her doing this I really do let's put it out to the universe now make this happen are you moving in Asheville I'm getting a place there okay so I'm gonna be there a lot but I'm also we're not we're keeping this and we're keeping you know everything keeping my place here and stuff so I'm just kind of testing it out yeah but yeah maybe that'd be fun maybe you'll come maybe we do some a couple of episodes Morgan Wallin's gonna come on one I'm
Starting point is 01:25:58 so excited about that's even though I didn't ask him yet but I think you will do it yeah that is awesome yeah I'm just kind of excited just to be able to like I think just have different types of people yeah but I would but it's so funny because I was listening to Dolly Parton sings that I will always love you a lot of people know she did that oh yeah people think it's Whitney Houston she did was great but no you know what she wrote that she wrote that after she she quit that show that she was on no way really oh it's a whole for Porter Wagner she wrote it for Porter Wagner who is her boss she was on that show with
Starting point is 01:26:34 him and she quit and he got pissed because she she made the show Porter she's what's that song somebody's are you a woman enough to take my man no it's like you ain't so-and-so and you ain't Porter I think it was her oh yeah I know what you're talking about yeah that's a newer song oh it is I think so you ain't Johnny or something yeah yeah that's a newer song who sings that um oh yeah there you ain't Dolly yeah I was listening to her the other day man I like her me too her voice her voice is different than anything else I've ever heard she's got like a yeah almost like a Dolly voice I could see that like Dolly's voice is
Starting point is 01:27:17 like you know Dolly sing odd it's like father time just damn busting in your ear you know she's singing feels good I just love her but I will always love you put this on a little bit Nick I will listen to a few seconds and then we'll get out of here is there a more beautiful woman she did it still beautiful yeah God bring it up a little for me now you could give me a reach around he would give you a look at this is a bucket list I never knew I had this this we're doing it there you go what a moment yeah you know what I'm pretty confident wish I looked like 1970 dolly I think you just remind
Starting point is 01:28:52 everybody you know that you know that just I don't know you're just so confident I wish I was as confident as you sometimes thank you you should be I know I don't know what happened no you are it's in there you should be you got that mullet you got majestic as fuck you go I got a penis shape like a candy corn oh wow yeah hey that's different you know you're different right you're right you're right it's amazing yeah it just feels weird or something like that you know nobody wants you know you don't you know somebody orders a jug of milk and you break out milk but it's in a damn you know it's in a cornucopia shape
Starting point is 01:29:32 if you don't want to drink it you know well you just got to find people that you just got to find a chick that's gonna not be scared of that yeah yeah and they're out there yeah I've been dating too many shallow wings yeah they don't like that candy corn yeah you know find you a candy corn lover yeah that's what I'm gonna do come to our Halloween party I will have a big oh it'll be on zoom as long as your husband brings that damn haircut and I've been looking at him in the distance guys I don't maybe you guys I don't even know if we said that he was in here but and he has an announcement to make actually as well right now oh I
Starting point is 01:30:06 do don't give him a mic holy crap we're having dinner with Theo tonight yes we are he's gonna actually be laying on the table we're gonna eat sushi off of him we're gonna actually get to have dinner and dessert that's great some candy corn for dessert I'm laying on my stomach for the first course and on my back for the second baby yes sir but you guys have a new studio that you guys gonna put together right you want to talk about that or no yeah we're working on it should be finished first week of September it's in our home our house was built in the 70s and the the room is underneath the staircase but
Starting point is 01:30:48 it's a big room and it was not finished when we moved in like it was like a safe room you know back in the day people have like safe rooms so the walls weren't finished when we bought the house we found an old phone in there from the 70s we found old porn magazines in the walls yeah so I haven't seen the room yet it's for my podcast I'll be starting Greg hasn't let me see in the room but he's been working on it for months so it's gonna be real nice yeah you can tell he's excited about it too it's cool right when he came in I could just see it so excited yeah and it just it hit me it just made me feel excited yeah he's
Starting point is 01:31:22 sweet bless his heart he seems very sweet he seems just damn decent which is the it's as good as you can get these days for a man we'll have to have you out there for our podcast dude I would love to come down that would be really cool what you do some dinner to okay make you a brisket okay dude I'll do it all yeah do it all I would love to come down and and I'm gonna put it out in the world I want to get Dolly and and we'll have you come to Nashville and we'll do of just a dang episode it's gotta happen right it has to it's gonna happen it's gonna happen it will happen it could happen it was used to be a little
Starting point is 01:31:56 boozy was the goal and now it's Dolly Parton I wonder if she'll need a pound of weed Dolly oh yeah we had a we had a surplus boozy and you know we the podcast starts when you said you don't know yet I don't know yet we're you know no rush on it hopefully the next couple months I love it yeah if you haven't seen Chelsea which I don't know you how you haven't because she's all over everything now you got to check her out and we'll share all of her socials and everything and just thanks so much over the years you just been so encouraging even at times you've just said something nice or just
Starting point is 01:32:31 mentioned me on Instagram or anything I just appreciate thank you well you know I'm a huge fucking fan of yours so thank you for having me well same back oh my god thanks for coming yeah now I'm just falling on the breeze and I feel I'm falling like these leaves I must be cornerstone oh but when I reach that ground I'll share this piece of mind I found I can feel it in my bones but it's gonna take a little time for me to set that parking brake and let myself on my shine that light on me I'll sit and tell you my story
Starting point is 01:33:24 shine on me and I will find a song I will sing it just for you now I've been moving way too fast on the runaway train with a heavy load of my past and these wheels that I've been riding on they want something that they damn they're gone I guess now they just weren't built to last

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