This Past Weekend - E302 Elevator Baby

Episode Date: October 24, 2020

New Merchhttps://theovonstore.com This episode is brought to you by:Magic Spoon: https://magicspoon.com/theo and use promo code THEO for free shippingFaherty: https://fahertybrand.com/theo for 25% offAthletic Greens: https://athleticgreens.com/theo for FREE liquid Vitamin D for one year with 1st purchaseMusic:“Runs in the Family” - Matthew Koziolhttps://bit.ly/37IGvXr“Shine” - Bishop Gunnhttp://bit.ly/Shine_BishopGunnHit the Hotline 985-664-9503Video Hotline for TheoUpload here: http://bit.ly/TPW_VideoHotline Find TheoWebsite: https://theovon.com Instagram: https://instagram.com/theovonFacebook: https://facebook.com/theovonFacebook Group: https://facebook.com/groups/thispastweekend Twitter: https://twitter.com/theovonYouTube: https://youtube.com/theovonClips Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCiEKV_MOhwZ7OEcgFyLKilwProducer Nickhttps://instagram.com/realnickdavisSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

All right, check check baby chicken check Checkers check your neck That's what they used to say a lot check your neck and people would go like this Or run a cheese check they say it run a cheese check on your daddy because You know my dad was real old when I was born and when I was young he was even older and The older I got the older he got and I was kind of chasing him you know age chasing and then he died but a

Lot of times we do pizza You know I was on different sporting teams or my sister was on a little sporting team, you know little lesbians group And then they would have a pizza party It used to originally it was if you won if you won your team got a pizza party And then that evolved to even if you got second And then it became hell if your team even if you even had a team You you'd see some kids just we're all wearing the same jersey never played anything eating pizza So it became really just every anybody could do it

But they used to say run a cheese check on your daddy because my dad was so old When he'd have pizza he could you know the cheese comes off that pie When you release that slice off that circle You really get a lot of that you know Those little Little kind of like a cheese web kind of like a lot of little cheese little String cheeses that go from the slice back to that motherland that master pie circle And so a lot of times, you know my dad he didn't know what the hell was going on

He didn't know, you know, who was who was his kid or who was black or who was white or anything? I mean he didn't know if you were a car or a person so I remember one time he put a half a gallon of gas into the back of my pants So you just uh, you know, daddy would have a have him a slice of that pizza and he'd have cheese just draped all over him And some of the kids would say hey, hey, hey, hey, hey run a cheese check on your daddy And you'd have to just kind of you know check on his face like that You'd have to do that dang dang the dang dang And cheese check your daddy make sure you don't have any just cheese just draping off his face You know like somebody's trying to speed lock off his face or something and

So, you know, you don't you just want to make sure you know that was kind of that deal but um Yeah, check check check and check That's a popular term to say chicken check Because a chicken, you know a lot of people don't think about a chicken think about a chicken Now what? Now what a chicken that you are seeing a chicken used to be like sit like like coming across a McDaniels bro when you're driving and you you see that you know you see the the arches you said all down that's a McDaniels right there that's the same in the old days if you came across

a chicken in the 1600 1700s that's like pulling up on a restaurant you know you're riding with your family you guys are in uh you know riding in a horse cart or whatever you see a chicken they say dad dad stop there dad stop at that restaurant and the restaurant's just over there it was like and y'all go over there and slice and dice and mom does her thing and that's family dining that's 1600s family dining man and the chicken dies but hey somebody's got to go man and that's called that chicken check happy autumn we running right here we running up on the heels of winter if you if you listen you can he can he can really feel if you listen with your emotions you can really feel us just

kind of lapping up onto the onto the heels of winter just nipping at the heels just nipping at the heels of that icy bitch miss winter and she's doing her thing but we coming at her baby let's get into the episode this is a little Matthew cause y'all with runs in the family tell him baby catch me on grinder huh there you go Maddie you can cut me down but the roots run deep I ain't gonna die when they bury me I wonder what I'll do when I die you know if I lay there if I'll probably I'll probably try to sneak over and just tickle somebody else that's been laying there piss somebody

off man I wonder what my neighbors will be like where I get buried that's why you know people want to get buried by their family but you gotta think about that you gotta think about that you want to get buried you know I mean it's nice to be by your mom for like an hour but I don't know if you want to be buried right by her it's nice to be by your uncle brown but if he you know if he gets in the gambling or shit it ain't fun you know it's just it's like who where do you who do you want to be back I almost wish that they had a um they had a funeral parlor that had a kind of a 10 disc changer remember them CD changers them 10 disc changers that they had one of those in the ground and everybody

was on kind of a lazy Susan and you just got to kind of you know just do like a little bit of speed date and kind of while you're in the dirt there's something you could cross paths with with different with some difference because yeah for the first hour or two it could be cozy being with your folks but man about 10pm and after they shut down they saw you know a couple of episodes at law and order SVU and they're turning down the lights you gonna want to howl a little you're gonna want to get out you're gonna want to throw one of your bones into the distance and let some dirty dog go get it you know that's one thing about skeleton that's why I think if scale if if ghosts were made you know if they had

real skeletons dogs would attack them all the time so you got to think about that right there I mean you know you couldn't send a skeleton real far without a dog getting that bitch right by the neck or by the caustics or whatever or the occipital or whatever I don't remember you know only got to be in eighth grade in science but you know shout out to science bro we had a um when I was young we had a science teacher and he used to do uh deltoids at the gym and he would do deltoids all the time and he would also at the same time eat altoids and so his big thing he would get you to come over by him and he'd be doing deltoids and he'd be any blow a little bit of a mint smoke out

of his mouth and be doing altoids he'd have nine altoids in his mouth and I'm not saying that I mean I don't know what the pH balance is of somebody's breath if they got nine altoids in him but I mean you like a damn Christmas chimney at that point you running a lot of heat I feel like and shout out to that man Mr. Cave man and he went to jail for a you know dating underage ladies but before that he was a good man I'll say that and I think he served his time too so it's you know and he looked good in a tank top I'll say that shit you know I'm an adult and he's an adult but hell he looked good in a damn tank top what's going on we just had the um the death man in we had Frank Giles in here and I tell

you you know it's it's interesting when you meet a man that's that's that close to the dead and you're right there you with him you know it's interesting when you when you meet a man who who's carried a you know that that's that 15 inch baby and tucked him into a car seat next to him and driven him over there to the death grounds it's interesting to be that close to that man and just kind of just hear his feelings hell I asked him straight up I said let me put my hand on your chest you know let me feel the drum of the of of death because when he walks in the room baby that's it you it's a go order for the Lord Son you it's time to box you up and so yeah I guess I start thinking about that around

this time of year what's it gonna be like when they close when they roll it up one more time you know I tried to fake my death when I was about 20 I'll be honest and my friend Paul called a couple people and said hey you know Theo's dead and and the shit the crazy shit was none of them even told anybody so we planted a couple seeds and that shit didn't even grow bro and then we forgot about it you know we was doing weed we was doing cocaine daddy you know I mean I was anyway I don't know if he was but you know my favorite type of weed was cocaine you'd see me snorting a bowl of weed you know get that little that thanksgiving for your snout daddy I'm talking about cocaine dude I remember I had some good

cocaine one time over there in Tucson Arizona hell I put two grams in my car was out of gas and that bitch ran for a half an hour the headlights wouldn't work but hey you can't have it all daddy you can't have it all and that's God man what else is going on did a show last night out here out here in the center least I want to thank everybody that came out beautiful time man you know and just good to just be in a room with people and laughing and feeling good you know and really just feeling good and um yeah we had a nice time couple of young bucks around here got up and did some comedy to start the show off you know I was all I was on the show and you know they're only the crowds here at half capacity

so they're only allowed about 160 people or something 150 people in the showroom so it's kind of nice because it's almost like you get to practice but it's still a regular show for everybody that's there and you know it'll just have to make do for now you know I'm grateful to have a just a spot to get out there man it really is it really is a good deal but yeah we had the death man in here we had him right here and it's crazy I mean it was say fast forward 40 years from now 80 years from now when I die or when I you know go on I should have told I should have put my order in I should have said hey Frank I want this you know I want this and this I want you know I want the I want the strawberries

and whipped cream under one under each arm when I'm in that basket daddy and I want that wicker casket so you could still still smell me so the ladies could still get up off of my bro loan you feel me but I don't know he's tricky how do you want to go cremated is too much I don't want to be you know I worked one day as a damn chef's apprentice over at um ever at Roadhouse Cafe or whatever that shithole was um link a lot I don't know what it was dude they were supposed to be selling char grilled steaks but the FDA showed up and popped them and got them they were selling them they were selling illegal meat you know they had to hit a raft in there they had to hit a pony or something you know the some

of the shit they were selling was illegal meat and that's the second time in my life I've been popped at a joint where they're selling illegal you know I was out in Tucson Arizona and they had this little chef fella named little Scotty and they popped him and he wore a big ass hat too heavy for his neck and you would see him kind of like this a little bit and that the hat was so damn heavy it would close his eyes man but you know when you were chef they don't give you like a medallion you know some things they give you a medallion if you do well but a chef they give you a big hat looks kind of like an like an atomic bomb explosion shape and he was so damn proud and I think his daddy thought he was bigger

and his daddy hadn't seen him in a while and his daddy got him too heavy of a hat for his little neck and so he had that big bastard on there and he could barely keep his eyes open with that heavy bitch on there but they are yeah they got but they were selling illegal seafood and I remember the FDA showed up and popped everybody dude you know some dude asking me if I know about shrimp bitch I don't know about shit I'm a bus boy okay and they need bread on eight right now so don't try to tangle me up all in this little mermaid bullshit but anyway I'm sorry I didn't mean to get all fired up but um but yeah we out here that's what I'm saying and I forgot to tell you a little bit more about that song on the way

in that was runs in the family by Matthew Cosial talents a young fella and we'll have the link there to uh to his uh to his sound so you can go get a hold of him and see what's going on with him and what's going on with you I'd love to know I'd love if you guys could hit the hotline nine eight five six six four nine five zero three and just let me know who's listening to the to to the show if you work at a kindergarten say that say hey this is Rhonda you know I work at a kindergarten you know I like skittles or I like to you know blow a Winston every now and then you know and I like to listen to the podcast or you know this is a Timothy and I'm 40 but I still go by the by the by the name Timothy

and um you know I'm a janitorial I do janitorial by the church and I listen to the podcast hit the hotline man let us know who's listening just so I know what's going on out there I think it's raining outside wow I don't know if y'all can hear that but that's really rain wow see I think I would like a cat when I go I'd like a casket that every now and then comes up to the surface you could get hit by low rain you know we got a lot of great responses that came in about people talking about rejection and you know I did I'm thankful for the stories man a lot of a lot of just people sharing rejection and and we'll get into it in just a minute and I'll and I'll talk about rejection but first I got to let

you know about magic spoon and magic spoon is I mean it's not what you think it is man or it might be you know when I was growing up cereal was important in our household we had five major food groups and they were cereal cereal cereal cereal and so and that was it man I remember one time we had 27 boxes of so in our house and you could go in there and sometimes it was um you know the older kids would lock you in the cereal closet you know and you'd be in there just frost or flaking your face off and stuff you have a and much cereal as you could have and you cry until somebody let you out but um but it was nice man and it's nice to go back to those times in your life and have you sit

at night and have you a bowl you got the baby put to bed you know a little Abigail's put to bed you know you clean that diaper off and little Abigail's resting you know or little Lance or whatever his name is little Lance a lot you know you took the chain mail off of him and put him to sleep and now it's your time to have you a little something to hit that frickin hit that face of yours with that magic milk and magic uh you know sustenance and who does that for you better than anybody is magic spoon you know if you want to cut down on carbs but still have that sugar cereal vibe magic spoon does it zero grams of sugar 11 grams of protein and only three net grams of carbs in each serving it come in four flavors

cocoa fruity frosted and blueberry what's blueberry and you know right there that sounds like the spice girls if they did a spice girl reenactment but maybe from you know um the Middle East or from Morocco cocoa fruity frosted and blue bar and look I'll tell you this it tastes amazing man it gives you just enough of that hit just enough of that childhood dose of having those magical tastes from back in the day but still maintaining you your uh your physicality and your health it's keto friendly gluten friendly grain free soy free low carb and GMO free and right now you can try it go to magic spoon dot com slash th e o to get that variety of pack and try it out today be sure to use promo code Theo at checkout

to get free shipping and magic spoon is so confident in their product it's backed with a hundred percent happiness guarantee so if you don't like it for any reason they'll reef on your money no questions asked that's magic spoon dot com slash Theo and use code Theo for free shipping we thank magic spoon for sponsoring the podcast go get a taste your childhood man that rain it's really coming in man if I keep talking about you can't hear you guys aren't even believing man but this rain man it sounds like about 30 German shepherds pissing on a tin roof man it's this is a hardy batch you know this that kind of rain where it's like you've been in a conference for three hours and the guy wouldn't stop doing

the power points and you didn't want to leave because you already on you know kind of probation or light probation with the with the boss so you waited till the end of the deal and then you've chirped out of that out of that crown plaza showroom and hit that year and now baby you know I wish they came out with a product where you could you could throw it in the urinal and they would clog it up for about two minutes you then whenever you urinated you could see how much you did because that's one thing I don't like is um you do urine but you don't know how much I mean what's the point of even you know what's the point of even pissing if you don't know how much you did you know what's the point what's the

point of of making urine if you don't know how much you just made so if we can find a way to briefly kind of clog up a toilet just a long enough for you to kind of have a little bit of pride in yourself I think people would feel you know that pride might carry over back into the workplace so that's just me spitballing baby that's what they call me baby spitballing Vaughn what else man what else is going on um oh we got these rejection called man they're good they're really really good so I want to get right into a man and thank you guys for being a part of this show that the number is always 985-664-9503 and I want to thank Raleigh Mow is not here today and it just just didn't fit kind of with the schedule

we'll we'll have him back at some point um we got producer Sean in today and he's not in here right now he's at the hearties but he um he is helping us and we are grateful for that man thank you very much let's hit a call let's hit the hotline here we go hi this is Ashley calling from Indiana and Ashley from Indiana baby and Indiana is a real yes a popular state one of the probably 50 most popular states right there gang and I just heard your segment on being rejected and I've never actually been rejected but I did have to reject someone one time and it was super embarrassing I um had a client at my vet clinic where I was a receptionist for a long time in a vet clinic you know that's where they

bring animals oh you got a little pony and he's got asthma they bring his little ass in there you know you know you got a little squirrel bro and he got maybe a leak in his uh vast deference and he's eating nuts but he's blowing them at the same time you know it's just they do all kind of stuff like that shit you can't handle at the house gang baby onward and um took care of his dog and gave him his medicine and told him how to take care of his dog and told him to have a great day and he left and he called me back about 10 minutes later and said that um he knew he was a little bit older than me but um I was really kind to him and he had just gone through a divorce so he wanted to take me

out on a date but I obviously well at the time I had a boyfriend and I said I'm sorry I have a boyfriend but being a good receptionist that I was I told him that I could take down his name and number and call him back at a later time if things changed well that's kind of perfect Ashley to uh you know to just be you know get that response take his number save it for later because you also don't know what can happen you don't know what God's doing for you you know you may be getting uh you know that may that man could be your second husband what if times get different you know what if you're you know you're current but your fiance or whoever that man the boyfriend falls into a volcano and now you got you don't

know what to do and you hit up freaking dog daddy and he's got a little bit of money next thing you know you know you over at his house early one morning making a couple of quick cakes for him in the pooch it's you know it's uh you just don't know you got to save numbers you got to save numbers you got to you got to hedge your bets you know my daddy used to he used to when the church plate would come around my daddy would throw a business card in it you know it's he's supposed to put money in there and he put that business card in and uh I think he thought they were like drawing for like a free lunch or something but he would throw that business card in there and he didn't even hey he he didn't even have

any business his business was nothing his business was trying not to uh you know sleep on the sofa at night that was his his business was just trying not to make my mom mad so he would throw it in there dude I don't even think it had any phone number I think it just had his name on it and said business card on it and he throw that bastard in there you know I think he was just hedging his bets you notice in case down the line you know he's thinking maybe the lord needs somebody and who he hits you know he's got that card everybody else has just been tithing cash but pops throws in that little that little connection piece out let's hear the rest of the call men I'm sorry I interrupt a young lady I don't know

why I don't know it's like I was trying to get him in for a rabie shot the next week I don't know what was going through my head it was super embarrassing and I took down his name and number and held onto that piece of paper like I was going to call him back at some point um so I really hope that guy moved on and I think you will too so good luck out there well thank you yeah and this is you know I got rejected by a woman at the crepery and I still sat there point blank and ate a crepe right in front of her so you may see me on a future episode of mindhunter but um but I'll say this actually one of the reasons and I'll get into the psyche of a male one of the reasons this man probably did this

is because you took care of his dog and in fact a dog is is an appendage of a man's you know private baby that weiner and and some men got that little yapper some men got that growler some men got that snuggler weiner some men got that winter weiner where their weiner is always kind of hibernate but if you treat a man's puppy well or treat his dog well then he in his mind that's a reflection oh this is how she's going to treat the rest of my body you know a dog is really it's an extension of a man and it's not exactly an extension of his of his privates of his penis but it's it kind of has that same if you had an extra penis that could catch a frisbee that's what your dog is you got to think into the

male psyche and um so if he sees you treating that thing he sees you you know petting the dog and giving it a little you know maybe a little treat maybe a chicken liver he's going to say oh ah you know if she'll take care of that she might take care of the rest of me because you know I remember being really young you'll try to I remember your penis becomes so alive at a certain point in your life I mean when you're 13 or 12 or 14 your penis is like a I mean it just it's just so damn insane it's like having a um it's like having a chatty friend you know you're trying to be cool and be calm and then you know your penis just activates and you got to do so you got to you got to handle him or mangle him you

know I remember when I was young trying to even feed my penis like a little uh cat and crunch I remember I get a little pocket knife and cut the cat and crunch kernels into halves and try to you know you know feed one of your damn weiner I guess or just you know being young man and just anyway I think that's why the man hit on you because you know he you came at the dull but I think it's beautiful and I think it's a compliment and he probably just was looking for somebody to show him a little bit of care and you were the first one around him you know it's crazy how we all could use some care man we all use somebody to pat us on the neck or to you know throw a frisbee or give us a little chicken liver

man if y'all can hear that rain it is cool though I almost wish I was out in it and the police as well you're hearing the police are around here but yeah I went I went kayaking on the out on the Harpeth about a two hour run out there you know couple people out there drinking Mountain Dew Code Reds you know and it was nice man there's one nice thing out here in Tennessee it was really a perfect day because the the weather was it was fall but it was hot so it's 80 degrees but it's you know October whatever 20th or something so though all the foliage had shifted you know because mother nature likes to use different crayons man she don't you know she goes she goes heavy on the green for a while but once

she starts to realize there's other colors in the box that bitch gets extravagant baby and one thing in Tennessee you can see that foliage man so you could really you just you know we're just yakking through these creeks and you just see the just all these trees and leaves and just the endless soundtrack of God man nature it's just a playlist that it's just a playlist that's it's never ending man as far as we know let's take another call 985-664-9503 what's up Co this is Chris from Connecticut what's up Christopher Chris and Chris is short for Christopher a lot of times or Christmas or christening or what else now see it let's hear more I'm calling about getting turned down just made me think

of a story from college I went to a bar with a couple of my friends it was after a intramural softball game oh yeah intramural softball I feel you baby intramural softball dude there was always some psycho on every team he had like nine headbands he's putting on eye black he's doing coke he's then he hits a double and tears his ACL his name is always Hank let's hear more brother let's go Christopher so you know that is but basically I'm dancing by myself which is another great part to the story I forgot but I'm dancing by myself and some girls dance with some guys and I look over and she kind of gives me the swoop to pull her in so I kind of swoop over I'm thinking smoothly and start grinding up on this girl

and she she's digging it you know she's down she she's grinding up on me and we're dancing and I just went in for the kiss thinking like you know next step is trying to make out there and she stops me immediately and goes whoa whoa whoa you are too sweaty and truth be told I don't know I probably was too sweaty after that softball game but uh yeah that's my turn down story basically she wasn't having it so hope that works for the podcast love you man gang gang buzz buzz as always and uh keep shit going man we love you love everything you got love you too man thank you bro I love you too man and thanks for that for that for that statement and I'll tell you this man uh you know sweat is really sweat is that body

river it's that baby glaze man I mean sweat is it's a part of you know a mother sweats when she bring her child into the world you know you don't want to see you don't want to you know be born in your mother's dry as hell like damn who's this am you know who's this dang uh arachnid you know you want to be you want you want that drippy mom after it you know you don't want you I mean I want to be born I want my mother in a damn tank top do you feel me I want her looking like she just had a you know had been doing two of days I don't want one of these dry ass mothers having a child and that's sweat man sweat is just advertising that you've been trying that's all it is man you know it takes

eight minutes to get sweat sweat's not a free gift you know anybody could just do some bullshit but somebody's got to do some bullshit at a decent heart rate for eight minutes to be sweating and way to go dancing by yourself man that's us dancing by yourself the ultimate sign of confidence if you look at different television shows or programs or even drawings some drawings you'll see somebody dancing by themselves and there's nothing it's a sign of confidence man if a guy's dancing by themselves at first a lot of other guys will like man look at this fool but nine out of ten times that guy ends up dancing with a woman a some woman meanders over to that guy there's something magical about it there's something magical

about that just that confidence baby that French confidence man there's something just warm about it there's something inviting so more power to you man it sounds like you're on a great track you're doing you know you're dancing by yourself you're doing your own thing you doing softball do co-ed softball that way you kind of killing two birds with one stone hit you know hit it inside the park homework that's all people hidden in softball and then and then you know dance when you get to home plate you know and you already have women there at the place you don't have to go to the pub dude I remember one time we used to play softball and they put this dude La Davious man and he was he was an urban

youngster if I'm real honest with him he might have been a little bit he might have had a little hit of Shanghai in him or something but he I don't know he had that kind of he had a look a little you know sleepish if you will he had that gas leak kind of vibe but and he was in a wheelchair bro he was WC'd up and they put him out in the left field by me so I had to be out there with him so every now and then you know the ball if it got hit high enough I try to push him over there to get under it man and we were man we were horrible we were horrible I'll tell you what's not horrible though it's Fatterty Fatterty brand one unexpected side effect of this year is fashion we don't even

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who's maybe going to try a new diet this will I tell you this you put it in the glass you mix it in you take it kaboom kaboom I mean it's like Operation Desert Storm baby this thing makes you feel ferocious go to athletic greens dot com slash T H E O and support the podcast all right let's take another call here gang baby boy what's happening with you what up son not much yeah a long time first time here yeah I'm calling about the rejection and one time my first day in my brand new apartment I get in the elevator there's it's just gorgeous for that woman way out of my league comes in I got in my dog right oh yeah you got that little hit man with you baby oh yeah and this goes back to it once you touch that dog in

the man imagination goes from that wiener dog to just that wiener you feel me I froze up man I locked up only thing I could come up was oh you like dog and she looked at me like I was probably the dumbest thing I planted her gave me a smile probably because she felt bad and that's what then we had to take the elevator 10 story up in this awkward embarrassing I didn't know what to say I was all right I was sweaty man I've never been the same gang gang gang brother you never will be the same man that rejection it it sticks in you man like a like a magnet with talons man it just it gets into you it each ass baby it each ass with buck teeth oh man and the elevator me first of all there's so many things

going on in that story first of all elevators if we if we focus if we just build an elevator that went all the way to heaven we wouldn't have we would you know we wouldn't have a lot of the problems we have but instead we're building two store three full three stories do what sometimes you see a building with two stories as an elevator bitch just throw your friend up there dog fucking jump we got wasting all of this money and also if we if we had a if we had an elevator that went all the way up to heaven we you know we do two stories three stories you know you go to a dentist you go to some tax evasion place you go to chiropractor bro do look if a chiropractor ain't on the first floor that place is a

scam bro okay in fact you know I don't we I don't want to go to the penthouse daddy I want to go to the penthouse man I want to go all the way to the top we should make an elevator that goes to heaven man think about it that way when you're ready to go you're ready to go it's not a bad idea man but dude yeah it's so tough when you get with a girl you start and you you have a chance and you're like you like dogs and then you just there's nothing you can do something your voice gets locked up and you have to ride floor after floor just thinking what do I say now and anything would have anything would have been okay you could have said anything man you could have said anything you're just looking at your

dog you keep petting your dog like a pervert oh that's heartbreaking man and I've been there we've all been there I mean if you're listening to this podcast you've definitely been rejected by women and and we've all been there man we've all been there oh that's a frustration just each floor ding ding I'm a loser I'm a loser I'm a loser I'm a loser it's hectic man but at least you were in the elevator at least you had a chance you know I don't want to realize sometimes but I realize men get with who they're brave enough to talk to that's who you end up with a man's wife is whoever they were brave enough to talk to unless the woman picks the man sometimes that happens these days I'm drinking this mountain water

called liquid death and it's supposed to be one of the most fine waters they have from Australia or somewhere damn it's good too man how to taste wet bro damn it tastes like a million children is kind of gleeing in your mouth you know and not children like children children just like hypothetical adult you know non-ageless children am I talking nothing wild bro so get off my get off of me on that but yeah man hey at least you had a dog bro at least you and your dog are sitting there and your dog's like man I did my part I winged man as good as I could she patted me all you had to do was say something I think you owe your dog an apology though brother but I feel you man thanks for sharing we got another

call that came in here 985-664-9503 what up deal this is Greg so you mentioned rejection won't check what's up Greg and that's short usually for Gregory or gregarious is something different that's more of an urban name but Gregory for a white let's go like this how I was in Somalia like the worst place you could ever be in the world yeah I don't know dude I've been to a wah-wah in Philadelphia after about 148 a.m. dude and I saw a guy shoot a 22 caliber gun right through a um right through a ham and egg sandwich and that's shit if I can blew out the glass and that shit was pretty pretty dicey but not challenging you just uh just kind of trying to relate I guess onward getting shot at and I get back

to our our base and I got a letter from my fiancee hold on my back yep so I can hear all your story I'm sorry for interrupting you and thanks for your service man well check this out I was in Somalia like the worst place you could ever be in the world getting shot at and I get back to our our base and I got a letter from my fiancee saying she just moved in with some dude rejected had to go out in the desert look into the sun till my tears dried up anyways hey I love you show gang gang gang bro dang man that's hectic man that's hectic man oh you know I bet I'm going out on a limb here but I bet I bet it was real painful at the time man but I bet it after a certain point or in hindsight years later

I bet you're able to look back and be like man I'm glad that I was far away because then you're not there to have to deal with the breakup you're not right there to have to drive past each other and see each other at the at the twice daily or at the you know time thumb or whatever you know it's um I think there's probably some blessing in that now also being out there in the desert is sheer hell man I remember I went to Kuwait one time to do some military shows and I was on cigarettes and I was doing cigarettes brought puff out brah I was jerking off and puffing out you know I was basically just doing my best and and I remember it was too hot to even smoke it was too hot to even smoke

a cigarette the air outside was hotter than a cigarette was so if you inhaled a cigarette it was almost it was a colder it felt like then the regular air so it was just worthless you know pointless it just you could just inhale the regular air and it felt like a cigarette so hot and I remember some girl went on their morning run or something and she stopped by my low cabin or whatever and tried to make love to me and I couldn't get an erection so I mean she was petting my dog man with she was petting my dang dog and that thing just wasn't waking up I think about it was just old yellow brah my wiener was dead man what else man uh oh I'll tell you one thing that about about uh being an elevator

that gets my girdle I mean it just boils my damn beef uh boils my beef is when somebody gets in with a little child and they're like okay okay Tanner press the button and Tanner standing there he's got all ten fingers up his nose you know he's just straight bug hunting he don't give a damn and they're like all right Tanner press the button and Tanner's like then he beats his damn little booger hunters up against the alt like you know up against all the buttons it never reminds me actually I gotta tell you this one this one story uh I'm in an elevator I'm going back to elevators and I'm in the elevator I get in and this couple gets in at the same time and they have a little child man and his child

probably been alive maybe I'm guessing probably 170 days you know he still smelled a little gamey still a little gamey in the air and uh you know like if an animal came up I bet he would pick that little baby up by the back of the neck you know what I'm saying he's still a little fresh out that mom body so we're in there we get in and I felt like the mom had maybe been drinking and she said to the husband she said oh honey maybe Dunstan will want to press the button and first of all you can't name a baby Dunstan you can't name a baby Dunstan man I think Dunstan is a baseball bat you can't name a baby Dunstan think about a baby named Dunstan dude yeah you can't so I'm looking I'm like Dunstan

and I'm looking at the baby and I'm thinking well sure surely she doesn't mean the baby the baby is five months old that baby couldn't Dunstan don't have he you know he can't move his arms he don't he's like a scarecrow with with no scare in him he can't do nothing you know um I mean a snake could eat him you know he has no Dunstan don't have any capabilities so she's like honey honey maybe Dunstan would like to push the buttons and I'm standing there like we gotta get going you know it's been about 18 seconds that's a long time to start it for an elevator to start in modern day so then the husband he has his his is looking at his face like what like I don't know but then you can tell who wears the

pants and the family the lady and I don't know if she like wanted to show off for me or what she's thinking but next you know the guy like puts you know Dunstan by the buttons and he don't do nothing I knew he wasn't gonna do nothing and I'm thinking man I wish I had a law degree somebody needs to be here on behalf of Dunstan somebody gonna have Dunstan best interests man and then they take Dunstan man and the dad like puts him by the thing and he's not pressing them because he can't press him because he can't do anything the only thing he's pressing or even thinking about pressing is just pressing a tit into his face you know he's that milkhound baby he's that fucking leche weasel daddy so now

he like takes the baby and like pushes the baby against the buttons like the side of the baby like the shoulder and the ear and the in the head he like pushes like three buttons with little Dunstan is pushing him up against the buttons man and I pushed my own man he's like what floor you want to go to I was like if I'll give Dunstan's already done enough man we're going to four fucking floors that none of us are on I'll go where I need to go I handle my own shit alright let's take another call here yo Theo what's up it's your boy Matt from New York and what's up Matt and good to hear from you my man and thank you for calling and being a part of the show in New York one of the premier states

one of the first states they ever had New York onward I heard you got rejected sucks man I've been there thank you brother yep we are we all have and it's good to hear that others have more so I had a funny rejection story so I was working at Planet Fitness at the gym and I don't know if we're gonna call Planet Fitness a gym man but I'll go on with you I'll go on with you here this cute Asian girl will come in there and I kind of had a thing for her so I'd flirt with her you know whatever and oh yeah baby that Peanoy daddy onward and I was nervous to ask her out though she seemed really shy I couldn't tell if she was into me or not and that's the Asian dilemma right there when it comes

to white males and Asian women you have no idea you have no idea you could be getting married to an Asian woman and you have no idea if she likes you or not there is no I mean if I were Asian I would just play poker no one has any idea what is going on you could be a brain surgeon you could work at a hardys I there's no gives onward and then like some of my co-workers hyped me up they're like oh man go for it go for it so I thought oh I'm gonna I'm gonna do it big I'm gonna buy her a flower I got her a rose and I hid the rose like behind the desk and I waited for her to leave oh man so much romance onward and this is the most embarrassing thing because she walked out into the parking lot and I followed

her out like now saying it out loud it sounds so creepy but at the time I thought it would be like romantic and I said hey excuse me and then she turned around and I gave her a flower and I was like you know maybe we should we should go go out sometime you know give me a chance blah blah blah and she's like she was so she felt so awkward I could tell and like at this point I knew I fucked up and she's just like oh I'm busy with school and stuff whatever and then like it was horrible because then she would come in to work out and I'd have to see her again and every time I was like trying to hide and shit so yeah we've all been there man so don't feel bad but anyway gang gang gang brother dang what

a story man oh I can feel you hid that flower the whole time one of your co-workers notice they're all like chatting behind your back like damn he's about to fucking take an L you know and you're all fight you hyped up and and once your mind goes over that cliff of I'm gonna take a flower to a girl you are it's bro it ain't the 1800s I feel you I love the romantic side it's just not as appreciated these days people think you're a stalker people think you're a stalker with a you know who also has a you know green thumb but man I commend it bro you hiding that bitch you know you got a little bit of foliage tucked off behind the Z rocks you sneak over ta-da she's shocked and then she gave you the most age

I have to go to school more I have to go to school more come on at least come up with some others I'm on you know do something else I'm on swim team I have to swim all the time anything other than that I have to go to school but honestly bro in some Asian traditions man that's the thing it's school or die bro there's not a lot of middle ground you know you and a lot of Asians they get a B they go missing and that's documented man and then going back to the gym man I respect the hustle I don't know if it's anytime fitness or planet fitness one of them dude it's like seven it's like $7 a month you go in there there's a cocaine anonymous meeting going on in one corner of it little boosies in another corner shooting

a rap video you know some guys some guys using one of the overhead pulldown bars to pry off an ankle bracelet someone left a baby in a box at the bottom of the stair master there's a produce section for some reason there's people practicing for supermarket sweep in there it's just there's some guy who has an aquarium it's like what it's just none of it makes any sense a lot of people are just going there to bathe some guys storing stuff in there like you go in some guys like has 40 locks on all the lockers in there and he's just storing all of his shit instead of getting like a regular storage and I don't know if that's anytime fitness or planet fitness but one of them man one of them will leave you

will leave you wanting more sometimes but you get that grind baby you get that grind and that's what's important man and that's what's important about your story man you got that grind dog dude I remember when I was in let me think 6 7th grade there was this rich girl and I don't know she might not have been rich but she was rich to me man she had two parents she had a like a cat that was doing well you know she was they were you know she was doing good and I remember we went to their basketball game and I got me a flower bro got me a rose in advance and I got it was nice dude it was like $2.20 and they wrapped it up and that was an extra dollar and I went all in I had to get a ride all

the way out to the other school and I went with one of my oh I actually wrote out with one of my buddies because he was dating another girl and and he was dating another girl and so we went to the basketball game and dude she was on the cheerleading team and at one point they sat down because they you know they dance team or something and I walked over their dog and my face was turning red as could be and I got down on one knee bra down on one hoof man like a marriage I didn't know what to do I didn't know how to do it I got down on a one knee bra like a marriage and I gave this chick a dang rose man and the ball came bouncing over like that you know I wasn't even playing ball like you know like what

a loser I think some kid called me the n word again it was just bad I think even the referee called me the n word but that was love man I gave it a shot you know there's something valuable in that you know you you you're unforgettable you know you're dancing bra everybody else is standing around and doing this and sliding into the DMs man and you're sliding into that demilitarized zone baby you're sliding right in the in the Shanghai man you know you're showing up in real life sliding into the DM but that rose baby that Shakespeare move and there's some value in that there's a you know you're dancing man everybody else is kind of doing the walk but you're you're dancing and when you dance by yourself dog that never

goes away however you do that in your life it comes out in all different types and facets man so that's what we do here man we get rejected brother we show up and I'm happy to be showing up for myself today man it's not always easy but you know you guys are always there for me in support and and I appreciate that and I and I try to do the same as much as I can for you so gang man love you guys man yeah what else do we have going on we got some good episodes coming up Joe Coy will be on what else we're trying to have a we got a couple of neat guests on I don't want to say them yet because we're we're we're we're close to having them but you know we're really hopeful and and what else man I just hope you're doing

okay wherever you are today you know hope you know that you know that you're loved man and there's people thinking about you whoever you are even if maybe you feel like there isn't sometimes it's not that people don't love us is that we can't feel it you know and I hope you find a way to get out there this week and drop that road or hit somebody with that foliage dog you know what I'm saying I'm a damn dandy lion that's some little hope I'll be real with it so we'll go out the way that we came in man because that's life baby how we gonna go out how we gonna come in we're gonna dance while we here we're gonna show that foliage while we here damn your co-workers brother bass they let you ride out into the

distance dog but that's fine man they ain't us dog they back there doing they probably lonesome man you gonna find somebody gonna find your lady guinevere dog amen 100% fool go out the way we came in man with Matthew Cosial and runs in the family I would tell you if any new shows have coming up but I don't have any you know we're still dealing with the disease and corvid lurks man or does it who knows we don't know everything the elections coming up you know I've already made my choice I choose people man I choose people over politics man I just been thinking a lot about it and I'm not I'm just not letting these forces divide me from people I mean we already losing connection here and there and now now they

got people on you know putting us on different sides playing this big dirty game a red rover you know I will vote I will vote and I encourage you to vote for whoever you want to whoever you want to but in my heart I think I need to make another choice and that's and that's for people man you know but also I don't know what I'm talking about so but I love you man I'll see you at that at that anytime fitness baby anytime fitness and florist gang this is Matthew cause y'all with runs in the family be good to yourself man it's out of my hands it's by the wicked washed in the mud can't save my soul so let the fire lead for a moment

Can't watch the scene from the heads, it made me care Now Runwood runs in the family Runs in the family Way to go baby You can cut me down, but the roots run deep We get rejected baby, we keep rolling baby I ain't gonna die when they bury me We've all been rejected dawg

Find me in the rejections section Pray for mercy baby I wear the clock that I'm cut from It's just a matter of time Come on Maddie! There ain't no stopping the setting sun Can't watch the scenes from the heads, it made me care Now Runwood runs in the family

Runs in the family Man, that's a good tunnel baby Yeah Runs in the family Runs in the family And we love you A little time For me to set that parking brake And left myself unwind

Shine that light on me I'll sit and tell you my story Shine on me And I will find a song I will sing it just for you And now I've been moving way too fast On the runaway train with a heavy load of my hands And these friends that I've been riding on

They want so thin that they're damn they're gone