This Past Weekend - E319 Turtleneck Soup

Episode Date: January 28, 2021

Theo talks about Dustin "The Diamond" Poirier avenging his loss to Conor McGregor, going hunting alongside some falcon companions and takes calls from listeners about their favorite childhood restaurants.   New Merch https://theovonstore.com https://bit.ly/theo-von This episode is brought to you by: Manscaped: https://manscaped.com/theo Magic Mind: https://magicmind.co and use promo code THEO for 10% off Skillz: https://skillz.com/theo and use promo code THEO for double the cash BetterHelp: https://betterhelp.com/theo for 10% OFF your First Month BeachBody: Text THEO to 303030 for a special FREE trial     Turnbull Creek Falconry: http://turnbullcreekfalconry.com     Music: “Makin' It” - Bishop Gunn https://bit.ly/3abV2Kx     Hit the Hotline [phone]     Video Hotline for Theo Upload here: http://bit.ly/TPW_VideoHotline     Find Theo: Website: https://theovon.com Instagram: https://instagram.com/theovon Facebook: https://facebook.com/theovon Facebook Group: https://facebook.com/groups/thispastweekend Twitter: https://twitter.com/theovon YouTube: https://youtube.com/theovon Clips Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCiEKV_MOhwZ7OEcgFyLKilw     Producer: Nick Davis https://instagram.com/realnickdavis   Producer: Sean Dugan https://www.instagram.com/SeanDugan/See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Good to be here with you and good to be here without you actually It'd be awkward if you were all here at this moment because it'd be too much This is small space is minimal You know you get minimal space and you just you can't do much with it To a spider this would be a big room, but to a man. This is This is nothing to really write home about Today's episode is brought to you by magic mind magic mind. Oh damn. I

Dropped it man. Ta-da magic mind it It is the anti procrastination sipper if you want to Really create flow state and get yourself out of procrastination Get that magic mind It's the organic alternative to five-hour energy magic mind dot co use promo code Theo for 10% off oh Man, what's going on a lot a lot the diamond one, baby You know that boy the diamond one

What else I went hunting I? Went hunting for something And outdoors hunting You know not just looking for something like a remote control. I'm talking. I did it. I went out there and I'll tell you about it. So I A friend of mine out here an adult he knows a man who does falconry You know deviant birds And I'm not gonna say that these birds are caught up with the dark arts, but I mean they are

Each one of them had probably half a can of Voldemort in them and that's really the truth and So the man does falconry and You know Bobby Kennedy Jr. Had talked about it when he was a guest on here about being around Falcons and and you know kind of Doing homing pigeons that sort of thing when he was growing up But basically what happened was we went and met up with this man behind a church or in front of a church actually first First we met in front of a church. We pulled up. He had a maroon van with two decent Birds in it big, you know big I'm talking about these things were these things were from the dam

They are from the middle of the Bible these things. They was really I Mean these were you know some of the get those game of thrones or these these birds But if these birds shit, they would drown a baby, you know what I'm saying? It was all they had these birds were They were real birds You know like you won't see if you see one of these birds with a canary It's only cuz they trying to fuck, you know what I'm saying like these birds was more about They were more prehistoric prehistorical

You know like if you went back in time and You saw a bird it might be one of these that's what I'm telling you So when we get out there and the man has two Falcons in the back of a red van and I didn't believe him You know cuz I grew up in kind of a you know kind of a troubled area and a lot of times a guy says hey I got two Falcons in the back of a van Somebody's breaking their dick out to be honest

And but this guy, you know, he it was they were real honest and And they had him, you know and everybody was clothed and they had the birds and so We go back behind the church and he has a friend there another man and now we're with two men adult men and They both had on What is it called when you're hopeful the It's like a basketball rim, but it's for your hand. It's like a Jesus not a championship

They both had on wedding rings and So next thing, you know, we get in the woods they have the birds they have a little dog too and the dog and they're called Tumble Creek Falconry I Want to get the name right hold on. I think that was it tumble Creek Falconry and they do falconing and

And so anyway, we get out there so they give us a big stick Because they want you to have a big stick if you're out there This thing called. What is it called here? Turnbull Creek Falconry and they're legitimate and so you get out there and they give you a big stick like a big Like a bottom of an axe like an axe Like if you're like if you're an axe person, but you quit axing, you know But you still want to have the stick, but you don't want to have the blade and And they it's about four feet long and you go you go along you beat the trees, right? You beat the trees and

And the birds first of all here. Let me let me back pedal. Hold on The birds the birds the birds they get them out the cage that he got helmets on they got little like a hide-and-go-seek Little outfits, you know almost like if your grandmother wanted if your grandmother Wanted to make you a hide-and-go-seek outfit for when you counted that it's like a little It covers your eyes, you know what horses wear If you ever been to a fancy city and they got a couple horses down there and They usually have an alcoholic that's running them and they'll you know for a few dollars

They'll pull you and your lady through the city and you can ask her if she wants to marry you or not or whatever Or you don't have to ask her a lot of times by the end of the horse ride. You're like damn I don't even want to marry this woman and So you just keep the ring in your pocket and you go home But but anyway, it's like the blinders like the blinders so they have that on the birds to the birds they come out They both got a Little blinders on full blinders. They can't see anything like if you asked them how many fingers you was holding up They wouldn't squat

So they got the two birds and And dude, it feels like old school. It feels like you would be the It feels like if you showed up with these things you would get the most Pussy at a renaissance fair and I'm sorry for saying pussy as well So I'm gonna say that also, but um You would be oh You would have all the big titty at a ren fair

If you showed up with these straight up just Falcons, baby these heat seekers I'm talking about the Lord's freaking Southwest Airlines, baby big birds So anyway, they come out with the little headcaps on and they're moving but it looks like they're sleeping but basically so then you start walking in the woods you take off their headcaps and And they fly up into the trees So now you have two birds up in the air in the trees and sometimes they'll swoop off and do a just a loop-de-loop and come back to a branch And so the rest of us men grown men We wander

And you get in different lines and you wander through the woods and everybody has like a piece of an axe A stick an axe bottom an axe leg I don't know what's called axe leg And you hit the trees with it And you hit the underbrush And you hit the trees And you're hoping you rounds up a squirrel A round up a little rabbit, you know when a mr. McGregor's little buddy's little cotton tail

And you keep going in the birds though as you walk the birds will they will kind of jump from they'll hop there are kind of coast from one tree to the next So you guys are moving and like this like this unique pack where they're upstairs and you're downstairs But everybody's in the same kind of move move moving hunt house It's like this you're just it's not a real house, but you're just you know, you're kind of in a pack And then suddenly something will happen like you'll hit a tree and it'll make a And a little squirrel will have been being real secretive and he'll move his neck And that's all it takes for these big birds is one just Just one jostle of a neck

Muscle and they and next thing, you know, they're on the tree and they start to They start to like a corner the squirrel So we get the squirrel he's moving the corner of the squirrel So one of the birds gets ahead of it one of his and blows it And then they jump from branch to branch bump up bump bump bump bump bump bump And then next thing, you know one of them goes in for the attack And uh And that was it man. We you know, we did they did us and that's nature

You know people want to say this and that that's nature, baby Okay, and it's all You know, God laid out those more those marbles You know, he laid that's we're not You can say this and that but that's That's somebody else's plan. Don't talk to me about it. Go pray about it. If you have an issue with me Talk to me about it. Go pray about it. If you have an issue with it Because that's just that's what those birds do

So anyway, the birds were you know, they get a squirrel and then Oh and the birds will hold the squirrel down. It was wild So they they caught one squirrel and then they caught a There's a little dog as well A little white and black dog Maybe Mexican. I don't know. I didn't get a good look in his eyes, but he was mixed. He was real real mixed man. He uh He had that jack rustling him, baby that Eddie Bravo. You know what I'm saying And he was real pertinent. He was real particular. He would go over. He was only hunting

And if you try to pet him or scratch his belly, he fucking kick you, bro. This dog It wasn't this wasn't no You know, he was on on the job That's like a FedEx man. He tried to run up and tickle him or something or You know or hide one of his boxes. He might fuck you up And that's like this guy this this dog was so We went through and what else did they catch they caught a rabbit

and opossum And it was just magical man at the beginning of the day. I'm like scared of the birds and by the end of the day I'm like I'm just I'm like I feel like the birds are like working for me and I'm in I mean, I feel like I'm on the damn fifth page of the bible, baby I'm keyed up. You know what I'm saying? We're hunting and they're picking up stuff I'm sending one of the birds to go get me some Twizzlers and Mike and Ike's like these birds. It's just really you start to become like uh con in the barbarian

So it was exceptional man Man, it was really really exceptional and we did some videography of it and we may put something up at some point You know, I thought about trying to do something where I learned new stuff like just how to do new things or have new experiences Um Because I've been looking for things in the woods when I was young But I'd never been actually really hunting You know except to hunt. Oh, actually that's not true. I've been I've been out to hunt Pigs and I've been out to hunt uh boar like boars, but I've been out I've been out to hunt

um ducks one time, but You know, I like that hand-to-hand combat and it feels more like that with uh with the with the birds With the hawks. I mean, there might have been hawks. I think they were they might have been hawks, but um Not atlanta. I think they were from well, they must have been from here. So yeah local hawks, but uh Whatever they were man. It was fascinating. It was fascinating and And yeah, we got a real experience and it was like about a three four hour high uh hunt

and it's just I don't know. It just made me feel so involved with nature You know, it made me feel right there. I just felt I just felt like a root That's what I felt like and I'm used to feeling like a branch and It was pretty powerful So, yeah, I can't believe I did it and I'm so grateful that I got to do it

My friend Bizzle took me out there and he's a white guy Even though he has the name of a nine-year-old black kid. He really is a white man and he took me out and um We had this fellow named Montsell went with us and did some videography and uh The fellows that took us were just great man. That's turn turn Turnbull Creek Falconry

And we'll put a link may you go get an experience with those guys, but it was worth it was worth uh It was worth the time. It was worth the time What else is going on? Um Oh, so on the drive there Right. I'm driving out to the Falconry And I passed by this car like a little red kind of um, it was like a Mustang maybe or uh It was uh, and this dude was sitting right by like right by the window

Uh, and he was driving but also kind of leaning like towards the window And he had like he was kind of leaning up close by the wheel But also by the window kind of and he had a track suit on you could see the edge of the track suit adidas style And I and he had like the stripes down the middle of his car going over the back, you know that shit Where like it's gonna make you go faster, but it doesn't it just means you Maybe finished high school that kind of vibe And I thought oh this dude is a drug dealer This guy is a high this guy is a high school drug dealer

And then it made me think well, why do I think that? And then I realized that every high school drug dealer looks the same None of them There is no no Crime person is worse at disguising themselves than a high school School drug dealer. First of all, they all have like a name like spoonie. Juicy Tate, uh, little Danny bruh little Danny, you know, uh Boof, um

Poop pook, you know, they all got the same type of name They all wear like kind of that track suit Slicked hair with maybe that Caesar cut chain And they all drive like a fancy car Like they all and there's no you're like, oh, that's the drug dealer Like why doesn't the high school drug dealer try and look not like a drug dealer? How hard would it be for you to get a freaking sombrero dog? Get a little uh

Tag it says uh manager You know or even manger misspell it who gives a shit get a freaking name tag Get a job at books of millions, man Damn bruh You know every drug dealer Unfortunately looks at they all and there was something if they didn't wear the um The uh track suit they wear the white tee The white tee maybe Timbalands or maybe

Uh, you know, uh Fatty sneakers And speakers and they all work at uh like an auto sound place all of them That's where they either work or hang out at And they just sell drugs to get more and more speakers put into their car And then here's what happens sadly The speakers are so loud when the cops finally try to pull them over they can't even hear the cop sirens so then

They get resisting arrest Because they couldn't eat because the whole system leads them to not be able to hear Then they end up as a hard of hearing 30 year old trying to get a GED But they never changed the style baby. They still drive the Mustang. They still have the stripes down the back Dude the drug dealers in high school sometimes they would even have the word drugs spray painted or uh airbrushed on the back of the car Dude if you're gonna sell drugs Don't write drugs on the car dog Get a overalls

get a um Uh that Do some disguise yourself, you know get a glasses man get a uh Um acts get a axe man a shoulder chopper man get a axe You know, you just have to do things to Not look like a drug dealer But unfortunately every high school

drug dealer Looks only Like a drug dealer Praise god, baby um today's episode Is brought to you by better help Now look, you know, I'm a I'm a someone who struggled with mental health You know and uh self-worth issues and

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Theo Make money while you play your games you on your lunch break make some money Must be 18 year old or terms and conditions apply not available in all states see website for details All right As we come back man, I want to make a uh a message out to uh boots on the ground luke and he's a A fellow over there in baton rouge Louisiana And he's a white guy maybe ginger semi-ging

And he uh going in for brain operation something's wrong with his brain He said they said he needs more room in his brain or whatever and Shit, I don't know sound like I I wouldn't even get it done, but he's getting it done so Just want to let you know we love you luke and um You know, uh You know, we hope you survive and if and if you survive man, um Send us in some pictures or something, you know

And do you know show us uh before and after you know show us that new two three bedroom brain you're gonna have And if you don't survive, but uh, just want to let you I hate to say it, but you know Let's get it out there and if you don't survive. I just want to let you know that um We'll keep you alive here on the podcast somehow So, uh, my thoughts are with you this week and that's boots on the ground luke over there and boots on the ground luke is um He was in a I think he was hit by a tractor or something a couple years back, but he uh What was

Wait hold on uh he He he he he gave the best man He he was the one that hit us up a month back about the best man's speech For his brother and you guys gave him some recommendations. So Wishing him, uh, the best of luck What else is going on? Oh, I saw the uh, well, look, let's get into it, man I saw the diamond fight baby And I want to thank everybody for all the dms and messages I got I can't even imagine what dustin got

Just by being a friend of dustin's I got um I got I man. I must have got 4 000 messages Congratulating me Um on that man's victory and he's a victory man. If you saw the if you saw the fight You know, he came out with a game plan which It just it was showed a lot of evolution of him as a fighter I thought this is you know, there's two ways that I look at dust and I look at him as a

As a friend and somebody that I care about and then I look at him as a fighter you know, so um You know on the fighting side I think a lot of people expected him to just come out and be you know cap and punchy out there You know fucking Benedict fists out there. You know what I'm saying fucking Larry knuckles out there Just bucking the trend, baby, you know and just hoping for the best um But he came out revamped

I mean, he would be a vampire, but with the sharp teeth on the bottom you feel me. He came out revamped And he had a plan And he executed it man, and there was something about him winning And I felt this in a lot of people that were what that were cheering him on that you just felt hopeful About stuff in your own life or things in the world, you know, you felt like You know the sun was going to come up tomorrow. You just felt like that a little Um

And I love what his wife said at the at the end of the fight. Y'all aren't gonna Don't doubt my husband again something like that. I just You know, I just You know, they just have never paid him fair They've never paid him fair And for him to be there in that hotel for two weeks And he's looking out and Conor's out there on that yacht on that bars Conor's owns a damn barge You know Conor's out there just

And I mean, I don't know if he could see it from his hotel window or not But if that doesn't create some determination in you um But I didn't doubt him and I was definitely scared For him because Conor's a lethal man He's got that freaking shoulder snake baby that that freaking arm though And his arm is a lot longer than it looks Jesus You know his arm you could row a boat with his arm, you know, he got a long arm and

um Yeah, it was just amazing man. I it was just It just you know, I was excited for Dustin as a fight. I was excited for Dustin as a person as well and about his future and um Yeah, it was just man. I was just elated. I was literally swinging from the rafters Of a bar that we went to to watch it at Like they had some steel beams and I'm in there just swinging back and forth like a chimp actually hurt my neck swinging on it So I've had neck pain and now I just

You know, I just have more um But I just I mean, I thought it was a good fight, you know, it was a quick fight, but I thought it was a good fight I mean Conor was still landing some blows kept uh, you know, Dustin was hitting him with those kicks I mean, it was just a lot going on Man, it was but I was just I was I was just I was excited

I was excited man Because I picked the wrong guy a lot of times in fights and you know Betting on the Colts or different shit like that the gutter the horse races you lose You know, you lose on you know, you bet on you know, $60 on frickin You know Donnie's enemy to come in third or whatever Or you know, whatever it is starburst anima all horses have the weirdest names But finally to get you know just to get it right And I want a thousand dollars from your boy Brandon shop vac

And here was the funniest thing was I got a text from Dustin After the fight and it said Tell Brendan he owes you that tell Brendan He owes you that money. That's what he said, man ah So I just can't imagine I think also there was a level of just feeling proud of uh for Dustin, you know feeling proud for him and um Yeah, I think there was something about

How It was like man, I can't imagine how Awesome he must feel right now, you know, just how proud of himself he must feel and just how Just deserving You know, you finally I mean damn his experience with the UFC seem like he's the one he grows up to the ATM and he's got to put in money and finally It comes out and you know, I think you know, I think he's transcended the sport and You know, I've told him that and

um And I'm I'm excited to see his future. I'm excited to see what he does inside of the ring and then outside of the ring um I think on the fighting side it's interesting. How do you figure out who he fights next? because You know If you go for the Conner trilogy, that's right there, but he just beat him and it's been five years since the last one like You know, I agree with Dustin that Michael Chandler who I love Michael Chandler's uh, and I hope to have him back in here soon and um

But he he should have to fight more guys. I mean, I understand Dustin's point of view You know, uh Man, I felt bad for Dan Hooker. I really like Dan Hooker. He seemed like a really cool guy um I also thought the whole way the fight came together was amazing, you know, um Conner McGregor is irish man. He's an irish man. I love Ireland, you know Shout out Dublin. You feel me? And shout out Scotland as well, man

You know, and Scotland is just drunk Ireland Let's be honest, uh and um And I you know what I thought that I mean, you know, the whole thing kind of started if I and I and I may be wrong But it started as a charitable thing Conner and Dustin were going to fight for charity to raise money for their charities And then UFC saw that and got involved, you know, um And

And so the whole thing started from a place of charity. I thought that Conner was was You know, he's a businessman now I mean, he's got to wake up the next day and do business. He's got you know, he there's a difference when you go from being An athlete to to the owner of the gym You're doing two different things. It's two different brains And I'm not saying that Conner's not still one of the greatest fighters of all time I believe it is. I mean, I just watched all of his fights in the past month Um

I remember after I watched all of his fights literally I texted Dustin. I said, hey man, where's you? How's your how's your head man? Are you how you feeling? You know, I was scared Dude, I hurt my neck. I hurt my neck watching the fight. That's how excited I was um But no, I thought they kind of was a class act and I thought that Dustin, you know, I'm just obviously glad that he won and There's just no, you know, he can't there's You can't deny him anymore And I felt his angst after the fight you could feel his angst, you know, he's angst it out

And yeah, he just said being there for two weeks and You know at a certain point if if uh, dana Uh, whatever the man's name is dana wallis or whatever. I don't know what his name is but dana Uh, if big dana the white money man, if he doesn't if you don't treat your employees Well enough at some point then they that they're gonna lose the desire to work with you And I I'm just look I don't know. I also I don't know anything She may be listening to this saying man. Thea doesn't know anything

And you and you you would be right But I I just You know, you got it you got to pay your employees You got to pay him. You got to want them to ride while you ride And I think people could say well, you know connor's one that sells the tickets and this and that and some of that's fair very fair You know what connor's done for that sport is amazing and and I'm new to the sport. I don't know that much But I think you're in the place now where you have to where you you want to pay the man You know and I think that you know

Who was james j. Braddock? Where was he from? Oh, he's an american boxer. Well, I think you got a new james j. Braddock, man I that's what it felt like The hot sauce balls, baby. That's cinderella man himself Dustin the diamond pourier and um And you know, we love him here, but I was ecstatic man. I was so so you know, I was I was kind of bum for connor. I mean, you know, I don't like to see the people lose I want I wish at the end every you know, everybody kind of won

but uh But yeah, I watched it here in the central east man, and they all you know, michael channel lives here And so they were going bononkers for him And his wife came back she went home and watched it and then came back to the bar after And she was uh, they were all cheering when she came in it was pretty cool. Um But yeah, it was it was just a hopeful time. There was something hopeful about it There was something exciting about it Especially at a time when big business is winning everything it feels like and the little man has been knocked down

And then you see uh A man like dustin who's not a little man, but you see him Say hey not today Not on my watch um And I'm you know, I'm done fanboying, but I was you know, I was just uh, I was stoked for him The guy's been on quite a journey and he and he has to prove himself every time And I think a lot of us can relate to that journey

Of con of just constantly having to prove ourselves So man, but it was definitely exciting. Um What else I'll tell you this And we'll get into some calls you guys had some great calls that came in. Um Places you enjoy it as a child eating Uh You know, um

Different places like that and a couple questions came in. Um And then I want to talk to you about some personal stuff as well a little bit, uh support for the podcast This past weekend is brought to you by manscaped Who is the best in men's below the belt grooming? I can tell you right now it's manscaped if you're going to put anything around your Your crotch or your nuts or your body Or your cooter it better be a manscaped item

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Theo look good smell good feel good with manscaped Um What else? What else? Oh, I don't know if you watch UFC. I don't know what was tougher Seeing michael chandler fight dan hooker or then having to Watch michael chandler do a backflip off of the cage I don't know which one was harder for me. I don't know which if I would rather have to fight dan hooker Or do a backflip off the cage, man

Both looked extremely insane Um, but kudos to michael chandler man on his victory and probably the greatest UFC debut of all time To come right out and and a lot of time in UFC they'll do There's a bit of a dance in the beginning You know, there's a bit of a non Kind of a non Non dancing capoeira of sorts a violent capoeira But michael chandler didn't do that. He came straight out

Like that dog like a You know Like a poor person neighborhood dog in the in the 90s that thing They ain't gonna smell you first man. It's it a bite So Ah And it's good, so that's what was going on. Um, what else? What else we got

Oh, I want to recommend a movie to you. I watched and this movie called our friend on amazon And it's expensive. It's a 20 dollar re it's a 20 dollar buy-in And you get to watch it you can watch it three times if you want I'll watch it one time You know, I'm no fucking pervert, but uh And it's a sad when watch it with a friend with a loved one, you know, it's just uh It's interesting But um

Yeah It's just an interesting movie if you get a chance you you watched everything you haven't watched our friend And uh, and I think you'll enjoy it What else and another thing I watched was tiger woods documentary And I think it's on hbo maximum And it's interesting It's a lot about a father and son And their relationship

And a lot about the media You know, um And a lot about popularity and fame and You know, the media really used tiger You know, his dad says in there he says, uh Uh, you know, this is my son. This is my greatest gift Use him wisely And

At the end I feel like Jesus It would email you right now, my god, sorry and by the end I feel like You see like kind of how a father used his son in some ways You see how the media used The father and the son You see how the son used Things substances to make him feel okay women sex, you know, anything you can be addicted to sex drugs

gambling money Anger, you know, there's food. There's every everything can be a You know a supplement for addiction um And it was just it was just this fascinating circle of like because his dad says use him wisely I think is the line he says no the father actually he says this is my treasure. Please accept it and use it wisely And yeah, it's just fascinating just how much like work the dad put I think he saw this a natural gift in his son for um doing golf golf, you know golf golf

and then um And then just took it to another level You know spent so much time and And training him And then kind of you know, I think probably from the father's eyes to look like kind of unleashed him on the world Um And it's just fat it was just pretty fascinating like

Because then the media played like this race card But I'm sure tiger and his family they were all in it, you know, they were it was just you know It's just the way media does things um try to get an angle, you know Um But then he gets so big and so popular that just the pressure of like Finding something that's just his own You know, you'll find addiction. That's easy Um

And it talks about his addiction to women sex addiction um Which some of the stuff I can relate to man I could just relate to nothing like on his level of popularity I don't mean that but just You know the feeling of something inside of you not being there And needing something on the outside To make You forget that you're missing whatever you're missing

Um But it's fascinating man. Those are two good things to watch if you like to watch stuff If you like to look at stuff now, if you just want to go back to high school and buy drugs you can holler at your boy big Pat, all right Slick you can holler a spoonie spotty otty ricky, you know, look down and run a little down So Dude, I remember being at school and the drug dogs came in there And I was high as hell man

I was high as fucking four gay dudes in a fucking hot air balloon, bro. It's fucking high as fuck You know, I was fucking high You know, I'm saying if you need me, I'll be up there bitch. I'm high and um I remember just I was scared of dogs at the time and I'm like hiding by the teacher and shit and they thought I was all fucked up and I was I was high But I was also scared of dogs, you know, which really are kind of feel like the same thing

And uh And I asked the teacher point blank. I said, well, can the dog just smell if I'm high And he asked the policeman that was with the dog and they said no I said, all right We good then found we good Let's get to some of your calls, but first I got to let you know that uh, the time is coming to get your body right God, I need it, man Man, I've been in just so much pain, man. I just got so much pain from

Just man every every freaking week something's wrong with my body, bro And I'm sorry to sound like I'm complaining, but I want to go do jiu-jitsu I want to be able to do yoga. I want to be able to do the things I want to do And I've just been feeling beaten down You know, it's a new year And it's and it is it is my resolution as it is many people's to get in better shape Physically and mentally And I like to work out

But sometimes the workouts you want to do you can't do them It says you need a uh You know, you need a couple barbells. You need a uh a hillside and a big boulder like just Some of the workouts is too egregious Or egregious, bro And I don't want to spend $2,000 on the tony little gazelle free styler Or some susan saran and you know You know a damn uh

You know a swimming tank or something for your yard. I can't afford it So I'm saying beach body on demand offers 1500 at home workouts plus nutrition plans So no matter what your goals are they have a program that will help you build And keep healthy habits. Come on. Come on This is the company behind p90x insanity and 21 day fix Anytime you've ever seen a black guy or asian guy getting fit on television. They're behind that Check out beach bodies newest programs like muscle burns fat and 80 day obsession Dun dun dun

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Just text th eo to 30 30 30 Oh, thank you guys for your patience man Oh They have a slip disc like in the top of my back and man it is It's a lot sorry to bring that on this show, but it is a lot at the moment Let's get into some calls. You guys had some great calls And people saying what they done and thing like that And I want to hear it

You know first we had that last week I wanted to say hit the hotline man hit that h baby Hit the hotline I'm losing my voice For uh, if you went to a special place to eat You know when I was young we went to blow jobs pizza bj's pizza they called it And they said it it stood for bj uh black jacks But everybody knew the truth, baby

People was blowing each other sucking off, you know touching dick to mouth mouth to dick, baby You know what I'm saying? Praise god, bro So, um, here we go a couple calls came in. Let's hear it What's up, bio? This is your boy brian Coming at you from uh, st. Petersburg, florida Oh brian and st. petersburg dude is a good place to get a Find a little buried treasure and maybe see a damn Tattooed tit, bro

Yeah Come on on what And I was just listening to your uh round italian's episode And uh, you were talking about going to bj's pizza when you were a kid with your family And you you asked us if we had any memories growing up of always going to an eatery I grew up in the suburbs of chicago and we'd go to this pizza place called papa paceros. Oh papa paceros, huh? Let's hear more about this is about this beautiful spot And you would think this was a chicago's good pizza, but but very similar to your bj's

Incident, uh, the pizza sucked man The pizza sucked man, but I know they had cheap beer so my parents and my aunts and uncles would go out On a friday night, we'd all get beer and pizza and they had a big old arcade And they'd send us into the arcade with some quarters be playing mortal combat and all the games And the one memory I had this tough guy was this one boy. I don't know his name But he would always dominate the mortal combat machine And he would keep his quarters in his mouth. So it was the strangest thing and he'd get done beating somebody He'd swallow this victory with scorpio and then he'd spit out like a little lizard spit out a couple quarters

Throw him back in the machine say who's next Damn man, and that's a sign usually of uh eating disorder You know that could be some type of eating disorder maybe um But yeah, every arcade had some kid at it that you didn't know from your town You're like who there's only 40 kids in town. I know them all and who is this magic man Some little fellow named laser or something every arcade had some weird ass kid that you never seen before Who was always winning all the games and doing this and that

Dude I was always the weirdo at arcade where I would like I'd have to check every little thing Then I'd go outside and check the newspaper machine. See if they had a quarter and then um Sometimes the video game somebody would have dropped a quarter and it would have got stuck under so I'd look under there Some of them I get a piece of paper and fold it over About four times make me a paper stick Make me a stick but out of paper. It's almost like Because a paper was a stick So really you just doing some damn

It's almost like when you see a mannequin made out of actual human body parts. You're like damn. Okay, this is You know, this is back back forth and forth. You know what I'm saying? This is refurbishment but um But I'd make a paper stick and I would try to slide reach under the machine and see if there was because it's only about A eighth of an inch there and it was dust in there is nasty They usually have a little runt or a little gumball down there And I would slide that paper trying to knock a quarter out the end Um

Or look behind the machine There was a button behind the machine something you could press it It would turn the machine on and off and I would always like wait for it to come on and think it was gonna Let me have a free game and it wouldn't and then there was always the person that would sit there and watch you play all the games that dude That kid whoever that kid was a little bingey or a little tragic We had a little black kid bus named tragic, right? And man, he was he never had a damn dime, bro. He sat there and watched you play

He was why he wouldn't say nothing, bro Damn, he wouldn't say I don't know if he ever even said nothing He might still be just looking at something But um What else would you say, man? Yeah, it was fun though the video games was a big part And I would get what was that game super ice brothers. Let me see super ice Super Ice bros

No, that wasn't it No, that wasn't it. Yeah, super. Maybe it was smash brothers, but it was an old one. I thought it was ice bros Yeah, there was some game just I don't even know some of the games were just so old Oh, Castlevania And you get to you know, it was like I don't know what it was. It was like some guy that was like kind of like It was like Zillow for vampires. It was like some guy that was looking for A castle, I guess I don't remember he

You know, he just couldn't really find I don't remember what it was It was like five. I don't remember if the place had a drawb. He didn't lie What he was fighting but you were he had a whip and you were angry at the realtors And you were like looking for a nice castle, but you couldn't find what you wanted Um You know, you'd be in like a 60 bedroom castle and you'd be pissed off them. Yeah, just I don't know I wasn't real good at it, but mom or dad give you that quarter and you go, oh

When you put that quarter in just the feeling you had I got a chance. All right Hit the buttons a couple times for the game starts Move the joystick Man, it was fun. That was a good time. Thank you for the call as always the hotline [phone] Let's hear another one Hi, Sam. It's Molly Martin from New Albany, Indiana Molly Martin

from New Albany Indiana and Indiana is a good place to Uh, really pull over on the side of the road and think about You know think about uh Some of the choices you've made Onward baby. Let's hear more And I'm calling because I just listened to your episode today with chris the first

A person with down syndrome to complete the iron man and I was crying from the first minute to like I was crying the whole Whole episode It was so heartwarming, especially because my older brother has down syndrome And okay, so you got that insider trading, baby. You really that really would hit that would hit uh Close to home if you have that onward. Thank you for listening It just meant a lot to me to see the way that you gave him The space to express himself and you did such a good job of like asking him questions and

Uh and having conversation with him. I was really impressed and touched by that and chris is so inspirational He's inspiring me to make my own dream board and to stop making excuses for myself of why I can't do this or that and um and to be focused every day on my dreams And um, I also really hope that you guys do that double date That you talked about on the podcast Oh, yeah, I think we might try that. I'm gonna aim for it you know, I mentioned terrace

Terrence Ross on the podcast and uh And he plays for orlando's magic And if if I can when the world's open, I'll go to a game and see if we can't find a couple nickels, man I mean, we'll take dimes, but we'll settle for nickels, baby. You feel me, uh Uh, but that'd be fun if me and chris could go on a double date to the game. So I would love to do it So i'm gonna see if I can't make that happen um

And then you know, obviously terrence will have to get us tickets, but that's on terrence, you know, that is on terrence, man That ain't my problem terrence Uh, so we'll see what happens, man But no molly. I appreciate you Checking it out, you know Man, I just went through such a week of like uplifted moments. There was um There was the chris interview. There was the dust and wind Uh tom brady making it back to the sea just things that made you feel

hopeful I think things that made you feel like, uh Like like everything is like there's like there is magic happening and I needed that You know and it was one of the most interesting things about being around chris was Well, first just from looking at him. I there's there because there there heads this assumption that That there's something that he like he can't hear you sometimes or that he's not paying attention like, um I don't know what it is, you know, and it's not from him

It's just from being having been around other ds children and stuff like that and ds you know And You know, were you you kind of I don't know. I think I went into it with this curiosity like what is it really like to be Inside of him to you know, and not I'm not talking sex or nothing like that I'm talking from a point of like what is it like for his frame of reference for the world You know, and how can I get that? How can I see what he's seeing?

Because I had a time one time I was in a halloween costume and I was in there and it was sweaty and I could look out the eye slots, but The the mask was real thick and And I couldn't move that grade and it was hard people couldn't hear me And I felt like man, I wonder if this is what it's like to have like a down syndrome or autism You know like you can see the world, but it just can't you can't interact with it the way you want to Because that's what I had felt I'd felt trapped a little So I think I wish I would have asked Chris more things like uh, what are things that he likes to smell, you know like um

I wish I would have talked to him more about feelings And asked his dad if he has like all the same feelings that Uh, people would out down syndrome have you know non-dsers um But hey, I think there could be another opportunity. I was extremely just inspired by him and also it was cool to see. He's 22 Are you 20? I mean he's 22 or 21 who gives at that age? Who cares? You know, he's yeah, so he's thinking about women just like I was at that age just like I still am half the time So it's just dope to see that look he's still he's feeling he's trying to find this other element

That may be out there for him that lady, you know smoking hot I love that man. He's smoking hot smoking hot Man, but it was special and his dad was special and uh You know, I just felt lucky to be in their presence. That's kind of what I felt like So So, yeah, God bless him man, you know and And yeah, we can do it whatever it is You know, what is it? What did he say the pain or your dreams?

The pain or your dreams, you know And he just kept choosing his dreams But thank you for that call molly and be safe out there. I saw an owl get Denigrated one time or I don't know if that's a word but killed by uh tow truck over there on 52 or 53 heading from indianapolis to uh bloomington So All right Let's take another call that came in right here, man

Um Here we go Hey, this is will I wanted to call in um, let you know about that what restaurants they used to hit when I was a kid Reminded me when you were talking about my mom taking me to uh, hardy's when uh, she would be taking us to school in the morning You know, that was uh, we'd always get a little uh, just a biscuit You know, you get a biscuit real cheap and then we get a little uh, the jelly packets for free So we could have a biscuit with jelly. Oh, yeah, baby that free jelly God whoever invented free jelly baby, praise god

I mean they knew they knew they knew I was gonna come into the world And I would be looking for something like that You know, something when I think about some I some I'm all lay in bed at night and just think about all the packets of free jelly that are out there Behind every counter at every, you know fast food joint just right under the just right under the ledge Just a bucket of damn free jellies baby and dual jellies strawberry and grape Strawberry and red baby And some of them I just can't even sleep just thinking about all the individual packets

And you know first jelly was all together and then they fucking separated it, man And I don't know who came in the germans or a bunch of business people came in and just You know Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no Zvitter's on, you know And then they put it all in the little packet little orphan little orphan teased tablespoons of jelly, bro And I call it jelly sometimes And I call it jelly sometimes

But damn there's something beautiful man if you close your eyes and think about all the jelly that's out there God this I mean, that's remarkable It's remarkable brother and yeah, I feel you man. I remember when When we had a little bit of money when mom had sold something, you know mom son on would sell different items You know when she did newspapers and she would do sometime You know cookies this company called vortman cookies And I'd sneak out to her car at night and have me about 30 30 damn oatmeal cookies or something

You know 45 short breads or all kind of shit So full of cookie. I couldn't even get back to the house, man So full I couldn't even bend my body. I was walking like a gingerbread man Which was ironic because I just had nine of them And uh, but son on mom would take us to get a bacon egg and cheese biscuit from mc daniels, baby God

I mean, I that was my roof's Chris daddy And I remember the rapper at the time it said bacon egg and cheese biscuit on it So if a girl walked by I'd fucking well, I would wait till a girl walked by And that's when I would open it so she would see the side Bitch, I got all these ingredients up in You know this that full manti, baby This that buffet grenade, baby this bacon egg and yes And there was something special about it, man, there was something about it

And I missed that man, that was fun and some of my father would go with us too when I was real young He only went once or twice before we got they got divorced, but he he he would go sometimes But I remember that man, it was nice man, I felt man, I felt fancy I really really felt fancy when we got that um Let's take another call. Here we go Yo, what up Theo? It's me and Elliott down from here in georgia. What's up, Elliott? It's down there in georgia brother, you know not the country in europe, but you know the state

Oh, yeah, george is a good place to get a uh hickey from somebody who you know who uh Really for anybody Some some people they give it to you as a form of payment You know they paint they paint, you know You paint their fence and they come out suck on your neck for 30 seconds brushes that kind of town baby. Let's go gang

God's good, baby, but what I'm wondering is Rumors are spreading around my old high school that I'm a homosexual You know kids thinking I'm a I'm gay really And oh, yeah gay man gay adult. Yes, sir onward. It's pretty stressful. Okay, because you know Um, I don't want people to think that and mean nothing wrong with that But you know, I'm just not personally into men like that. I like women You know, but you know, they're over here saying I like men and that's a lot on my plate

So I just need some advice for that Take it easy. Have a wonderful day gang brother and look I feel for you man. I know it's uh You know, I don't think that you know people don't like rumors And rumor is just a fairytale that's fired specifically at you like a gun Like one person pulls out a damn fairytale gun and just you know, caps your ass. That's rumor And And if they saying use uh in the homosexuality, then that's that could be alarming because if you're in a small area

And you there's only about nine women a day to five of them here to rumors you down to four women You know and if one of them doesn't like athletic activities and you like to jog in the morning, then you down to three women So yeah, it's tough when rumors like that happen But some of it you just got a man up and just you know, maybe it's maybe it's a sign that you need to start taking dating seriously It could be another man in town planted the rumor because they're trying to get the real dimes And you over here penny pinching, you know what I'm saying? So you're gonna be stuck You're gonna be stuck with a woman. It's less than a nickel dog unless you get out there and hunt

Because if he says that and then the local ladies say, oh, well look, you know, a little Elliott out there Slurping that bone Then I, you know, I can't offer it. I have nothing off for him because I got titty But um What I would say is man, uh, well first of all, there's always when I was young they had a rumor if you had on a Turtle neck you was get you were gay or flirting for gay You know, basically bait fishing for gay. He was letting other gay men or you know kind of homeowners or whatever Know that you were available

And I didn't know that shit man, and I remember a turtle neck truck Uh broke down near our house and somebody robbed it or whatever and next thing, you know, everybody in our neighborhood had turtle necks blue and green And we'd wear them bitches man people was cutting the sleeves off them Cutting the turtle off them cutting the neck off them people grilling them some people thought it was made out of real turtle Made soup out of them. You know, it was a different time But suddenly a lot of men, you know what I'm saying men Showed up in our neighborhood because they saw the turtle necks

And they come over and kind of, you know Ask you how you was doing to try and give you a little butterscotch or something So it's risky, man. It's uh, you know, but there's always stuff that's gonna happen and it's how you react to it, brother And I don't think this is that big of an issue, but You know, I think maybe it's just a sign that it's time for you to get out there and start being real with these ladies And quit p-footing around, you know what I'm saying, let's have it and baby Oh Okay

Wow Let's hear another call that came in man, and thank you guys. I want to say thank you for supporting this podcast If we're being a part of my life um You know, I feel so so grateful we have a lot of uh, man, I just feel grateful I feel grateful I'm just glad that I started podcasting You know, I didn't know that I was gonna do podcasting and then I started so

Let's take one or two more calls here, man. Let's see what we got right here. Uh What up, Theo? This is kelin from michigan What's up kelin and uh, michigan is a good place to Fuck somebody with uh mittens on Let's hear more. Um last week you were talking about Special restaurants or places you would go and you brought up tim hortons So I thought I'd use tim hortons when I was a kid. I it would go camping in canada And oh, that's a good

Good way to go missing onward could get tim hortons, you know, they're bagels Good coffee and shit. I guess I didn't get the coffee. I was a kid them bagels, baby them jewish rounds, baby onward But I always thought tim hortons was just in canada and then we went downstate to the cities and I was like, oh Tim hortons is everywhere Anyways, I always thought that was cool. And when I go there today, I think about Camping with my parents and stuff. So gang gang

gang gang brother. That's an anticlimactic story but You know, I will say there's something there's something unique when you find out that whatever is yours locally is everywhere I remember that I remember thinking wait, wait, wait McDonald's they have a McDonald's You know, josh has a McDonald's in his in in his town You know, they have a McDonald's across the bridge. They have two McDonald's Yeah

I thought McDonald's was just mine just ours when it was young and that orange soda god, it was good Damn my god, it was good Um, but thank you for calling brother appreciate that All right, let's take one more call that came in here man onward Hi Theo, my name is John. I'm from upstate New York. I'm 17 years old. I'm a senior high school and I'm going off to uh Well, I'm going off to the world after this and I Thank you for calling John. I appreciate your brother and I appreciate you and I'm uh, uh and uh upstate New York

And they cut somebody's head off one time up there on a greyhound bus man I'm sorry for reminding everybody about that and I didn't plan on reminding you but I just said it and then I realized, you know that I'd said it Um, I can't believe you're 17 Jeepers man. You're in high school. We're about to graduate from what sounding like an adult technical institution, bro. I can't do you sound like Bro, hold on a second. Let's go back in here. You talk and I love you, brother I do want to tell you that onward. Theo, my name is John. I'm from upstate New York. I'm 17 years old. Hi Theo, my name is

Hi, Theo, my name is John. I'm from all of saddening. Oh, I'm having Dude, you sound 52 years old brother Uh, and you're going out to see the world. What are you in a Charles Dickens novel? Let's hear more old I'm a senior high school and I'm going off to uh Uh, while I'm going off to the world after this and I the world are you lanny from of mison man? Is this brennan? Is this brennan shawb who owes me that thousand onward? I'm just not quite sure what I want to do with my life You know, I work hard. I don't get the best grades in school, but I work hard

And uh, I just want to hear your thoughts on this. What do you think a young man should do? Thank you very much gang brother Gang brother, and I'm sorry. I was making funny a man, but also I was just having a good time What would I do if I was 17 right now with a deep voice? I'd probably do some fucking honestly if I'm real honest with you, man I'd do mating I'd mate with women with that voice man. You couldn't You could probably make love to half your mother's friends, but um Um, what would I do if I was 17?

You know, if you weren't really sure what you would want it to do, I I don't think joining the military would be a bad idea Because you're gonna get a lot of direction. You're gonna get Uh, physically in shape you're gonna get camaraderie And I don't think we're going to hand-to-hand combat anymore We've kind of evolved out of a lot of that You know a lot of war now is more press of a button more pomp and circumstance You know more kind of like the introductions, but not the actual start of the round

Um So, I and here's the thing you'd be done by 21 and you're the rest of your life you would hit you would be so Regimented I think and have such a good structure that from then on you would be able to achieve anything you wanted If I could go back in time I'd have more structure That's what I would have Um Um, so what else? I don't know man, maybe race carin

You know start with like a real beater or something start with maybe a toy auditor cell or something High on D or something like that get out there dodge neon soup that bad job the Lodge neon Um I'm upstairs. Uh, yeah, I would do something like that. Maybe I don't know man What is it? You know, I would learn digital some type of a digital skill Or I'd learn how to teach people to hunt with birds

You know, I would just find something that you kind of like and if you don't know what you like Then try things until you find something you do You know one time I remember I went up to the counter at this recreational facility And there was a cute girl working there and I was trying to holler at her and this is about nine years ago and And I was kind of bored in my life I was just bored and she said well if you're bored, you're boring. That's what she said And I'm not saying that you're bored brother. I'm not saying that you're brother I'm not saying that you're bored john from new york. That's 50 or 40

Um But there's a lot of things out there, man And we just got to go do them and try them out So I'd say just make a little list of things that you love or things that even that you're afraid of And like brooks was said like brooks said man get busy living You know, I don't know if he said it or not he died he died at the grocery store and he killed himself But um What else man, I think that's about it brother, uh

That's it man. I want to thank you guys. We didn't do intro music on this one You know, sometimes we have trouble getting some of the music cleared Uh But next week we'll get back to some music So It's kind of interesting having having no music You know, it keeps the egg right on the grill. I feel like It doesn't give me as much to hide behind

so But we'll talk I got some personal stuff I want to bring up next time and we'll get into some of it or whatever nothing real crazy, but just want to You know share just some things that's going on and and um And just to say thank you man Thank you for being a part of my life and a part of this interesting journey that I've gotten to go on With podcasting and talking to unique people

That are having unique lives and and I don't get to talk to them if you're not here with me Um, because all I'm doing is just listening really same as you so You guys be good to yourselves man And uh, and I love you And I mean that I even lived I even love john's old ass little 40 50 year old ass, bro Hey, hi, huh? Hi, theo. I'm five. I'm six years old

Hi, theo. I'm four Yeah, I've been working at the factory. I don't Yeah I can't even I can't even buy a can of dip in my crib Oh, man uh You guys be good to yourselves man. How about that diamond, baby? Pretty cool pretty cool to watch a lot of neat stuff happening in the world, man

And it can happen to other people and it can happen to us man. You guys be good to yourselves, man Let's go bishop gone, baby making it I ain't seen home in about a hundred days. I can almost hear mama pray for my restless soul And I ain't made a dollar. I ain't spent but when it's going ain't killed me yet. I still get where I'm down to go I'm tired, man. Let's go, baby. I'm making it. Come on. I'm making wrong Feel right I'm making it and it hails where I'm headed then I'm making good time

I Most all of my Slip right through my hands and why I'm up next to me broken on the ground If this bottle wasn't our glance I'd say that I'm about an hour past the minute I should have put it down But I'm making it I'm making wrong Feel right I'm making it and it hails where I'm headed then

I'm making good time I'm making good time I'm making good time I'm making good time I'm making good time Between the lives I've lost and the feelings that I've lost I'm left here alone at my stand But I'm in pretty good shape for the shape that I'm in I'm in pretty good shape for the shape that I'm in. That's the truth

You guys be good to yourselves man. You deserve it and I'll see you next week. Okay