This Past Weekend - E326 Kilo & Stitch

Episode Date: March 2, 2021

Theo discusses the new, gender-neutral Mr. Potato Head, getting mobbed by Nashvillians when walking with Kid Rock, a woman who found a kilo of cocaine in a thrift shop crochet set and the passing of his friend and fellow comedian, Erik Myers. https://bit.ly/theo-von New Merch: theovonstore.com​   Erik Myers LIVE: Stand-Up Special https://www.youtube.com/ErikMyersLive   This episode is brought to you by: ShipStation: https://shipstation.com​ and use promo code Theo for a Free 60 day trial Babbel: https://babbel.com​ and use promo code THEO for an extra 3 months free Magic Mind: https://magicmind.co​ and use promo code THEOMAGIC for 20% off Liquid Death: https://liquiddeath.com  Fabletics Men: https://fabletics.com/theo and get your 1st two pair of shorts for just $24 when you become a VIP member at checkout   Music: “Runs in the Family” - Matthew Koziol https://bit.ly/37IGvXr​   Hit the Hotline[phone]   Video Hotline for TheoUpload here: http://bit.ly/TPW_VideoHotline   Find Theo:Website: https://theovon.comInstagram: https://instagram.com/theovonFacebook: https://facebook.com/theovonFacebook Group: https://facebook.com/groups/thispastweekendTwitter: https://twitter.com/theovonYouTube: https://youtube.com/theovonClips Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCiEKV_MOhwZ7OEcgFyLKilw   Producer: Nick Davis https://instagram.com/realnickdavis   Producer: Sean Dugan https://www.instagram.com/SeanDugan/See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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All right good to be here today good to be with you alive We are living here in time And I got some sage actually a Little bit of sage right here. I just lit it They say it wards off the devil and Everybody anybody like that, you know Frankenstein everybody Mm-hmm damn I let that hot batch found PG baby Ptl, you know it and this stuff when we didn't have a

Marijuana we used to hit this shit pretty hard man. I Mean I I didn't get high but damn I'd be at peace. I'll remember being at peace for all of the entire seventh grade Because of that damn. I can't get it to go out We'll pour some of this liquid death on it. I don't help. There we go Good to be here good to be alive and shout out sage Lanaker Shout out sage Lanaker off. They had a man in our town When I was young

You know, I wasn't I was a child and and there were people that were older and some of those were men and and this fellow sage this gentleman was uh He I guess had a if you he would love sometimes he would torch some of his own body hair with lighter You know, maybe uh, not a candle usually just a lighter and Um, and it would kind of purify the room. It had the same odd your As a burning actual sage, so I remember some I'm at a party

You know if people wanted to kind of set the mood or if people wanted to get kind of Native American they torch a little bit of his arm hair or burn up into his armpit and really Just pacify the crowd like that. So praise God, man Oh What's up? I'm alive. Isn't it weird? Isn't it weird to just You wake up and you're just alive again, you know

But you keep going at it. Happy March. That's one thing I can say to you and We are coming up on springtime and so it's a You know, you can feel a Corvid starting to disappear You can feel feel people having freed them and you know, they're starting to have counties around Um, America that the they're open no masks You start to hear it. It's happening I guess I don't know what to think but

Thinking doesn't usually get me anywhere anyway, so maybe I shouldn't do it What I do know though is that you should be careful what you put in your body and For an all organic alternative to five-hour energy that gets you into the flow state Try magic mind Magic mind. It's an alternative to coffee Go to magic mind.co promo code Theo magic for 20% off Let's get into the episode Oh

There we go This is Matthew Cosiol runs in the family Hey, it's out of my hands and in my blood There's red in a ledger and I can't pay you Come on Let's buy the wicked washed in the mud Can't save my soul with the folly flood I wear the cloth that I'm cut from

Come on Matthew It's just a matter of time There ain't no stopping the setting sun Can't wash the sin from the heads it made me care Can't outrun with runs in the family Runs in the family And some real strong lyrical component right there That's Matthew Cosiol runs in the family

Can't wash the sin from the hands that made me Can't outrun what runs in the family It's you know, I was I was I was actually thinking the other day Which would shock many but I wonder sometimes if we If like our DNA has the pains of Our ancestors in it You know just as much as you could have the

Ability of a You know say your great great grandpappy or grandfather Which is a way more appropriate name A great great grandpappy sound It sounds like somebody who has no enamel in their mouth You know tongue only One of them to bad boys, you know Kind of guy will just inject damn nicotine right into his tongue

And just chill on that bitch But um I was saying uh Yeah, I wonder like our you know our DNA can carry You know if you have a child it might have blue eyes or Or green eyes or red eyes or something based on what the parents have And I was just wondering what if you're you know What if your great great grandfather was

You know something happened to him And does that get stored into your DNA almost like a undeveloped film And sometimes maybe it takes a generation or two for it to You know mature enough or does dissipate enough and It affects you somehow You know I wonder like say if somebody tickled your great great grandmother But she was in a coma or something

You know when she died you know she was in a crazy accident with the uh Something simple like a hillside and a wagon wheel You know there wasn't a lot of hopper of unique accidents back then So she would you know run away wagon wheel knocked her down a hillside She was in a coma For two years And people would tick you know it's one of her nephew her little cousins or somebody An intern or some pervert or somebody would come in and tickle her at night

Just kind of getting off on the fact that you could tickle Tickle the comatose Without any recourse without even hearing a giggle but knowing that that tickle was getting Stored into her body Into her frame into the minutiae of her You know into the textiles into the damn Just the fabric of her whoever she was And then she died she died in the coma

Which happened all the time you I mean it When you were in a coma a long time ago people really thought you were Kind of hanging out with God but your body was still here so they'd come and people would You know hey give this to God slip you a little note You know hey give God made God a little bit of apple cider They slip a jug under your limp arm You know hey tell God I'm trying to do these new hats you know

They put a cap on you Then you're jugged up you're capped up You got hidden giggles in your body because the Night manager's been tickling you And then I just wonder if you know Do you have a grandchild or a great grandchild that just gets the giggles For no reason you know or You know I just wonder what the

I'll just wonder sometimes like If the things I'm feeling or thinking are Or doing even Are dreams that maybe A great great grandfather had or Or are things that happen to them or Experiences or fears or I just wonder sometimes like

You know how much of that How much of the experiences of our ancestors are in locked into the DNA of us You know And even groups of people You know certain ethnicities and And you know how much How much of the travesty of some histories are locked into the people And it takes a while to dissipate

And to fall off of their You know fall off of the core of their being Kind of deal I don't know I'm kind of rambling now but um What's going on I'm happy to be alive You know I What did I do Oh we have Travis Tritt coming on to the podcast If you ever got any erection

To a ballad During the 90s or 2000s That could have been to a Travis Tritt Song at a dance Dude I remember God about after I was always the kid at the dance who like got set up with somebody You know and so you weren't it wasn't like a little girlfriend so it was just like Yeah you know okay I'm with Emily or I'm with you know Larissa

And you kind of you were kind of excited but you knew that they weren't like into you so But you kind of hoped secretly You know and I remember I'd go to the dance and You do you know you They had the obligatory like you had to kind of slow dance with your date but then after that You could kind of free wheel it a little And I remember when some of the slow songs that would come on man I would get this Just one girl had like a damn

I want to say it was like a huge belly button like I mean Like a dang just like a little bowl Like a belly bowl you know just inverted and And if you were I was spry you know at a dance man I would get just spring and bone I had that 35th rib baby just peeking right up out of the middle of my body baby you know what I'm saying My freaking cock was just giraffeing around you know what I'm saying baby You know what I'm saying to you

You know I was spry I was ready I was procreational I was just You know God had wound me up and let me go And I was looking to just spray out And sometimes I would dance with her and I remember she was like I don't know if she didn't have any feeling in her stomach or anything but you could like literally put your Just press your damn Just press your just your

Fucking junk right up just right up just smash it And she was just like wise men say only fools rushing But I can't help falling in It was just a ballad would go on you know And you were just God What just like the world was thirsty for the sauce you had inside of your wiener that's what it felt like The world just was just That's what it felt like being young it felt like the entire universe was constantly just sucking at your pee pee

But those were the days man that is runs in the family by Matthew Cosial What's happening What's going on I need to get some pants I don't like shopping I don't like I don't like I want to make a goal this year to shop more from Smaller brands you know hometown places I've been wanting to get a blender for the past month so I'm going to try to find a locale electronics dealership

Go in there test the models There'll be a guy in there like hey hey I'm Ron Oh yeah that's smoothies yeah that's what smoothies That's one oh shit Oh yeah you got a newborn He's giving him peaches oh that's one That's one You know and I'll listen to the bullshit for a bit

Before I say look Ron I'll take it alright just You just shut up can you do it What I see the original Mr. Potato Head They changed the name to just Potato or something let me see what it says The Mr. Potato Head Article yeah I said Mr. Potato Head is now just going to be Potato Head

That's the thing a gender neutral version of the toy They will be offering a gender neutral version of the toy alongside the traditional Oh so they're keeping the Mr. and Mrs. Potato Head Um and people was uh some people were upset about I don't think the people were that upset about it but They said they say online which is basically a dangerous place to be if you like to have any peace in your life Um but I was thinking like well a potato first of all is male they have male and female characteristics in it So you got to know they are self pollinators I would have this article say meaning that every individual Potato plant possesses both male and female flowers for reproduction

So a potato has already got that dual citizenship you know when it comes to crotch Um so yeah why not Why not again what my question is what what what kid still wants to play with a potato You can't get a kid excited by giving them a damn potot anymore So that kid is not even mentally well let's be honest That kid probably has a little bit hit of uh give me a T Give me an I give me an S give me an M baby Tism you know it And I grew up heavy in the autism world

We had a kid at the end of our block and he really he had just nine different haircuts man he just He was kind of just I mean from everything from cornrow to damn fade to military to damn You know he had that kind of action gospel cut they thought he could sing he couldn't sing He was mentally challenged you know and They put him on the front porch and he would sing a AC DC lyrics and You know and just kind of cheered the cars when they went by and I don't know what happened to him And I would probably guess death if I had to guess something I don't know if I would guess death but I would draw out of a hat

See if there was a hat full of things and it's that had happened to him And everybody had written on a car what happened to him I would draw a card out of there and I bet most of the cars were probably said deceased And bless him bro praise God but one of my shit I'm all over the place Yeah what kid wants to play with a potato now who cares I don't care if the potato dude this that's not a real Mr. Potato Mr. Potato is a man He's a grown man he got his feet out like that he got some mustache glasses He kind of looks like he probably did a crime and now he's hiding

You know he looks a little Polish but maybe also kind of urban bro You know kind of Afro Polish maybe if you look at him base you know If he's that kind of Idaho kind of gold you know But now if they want a potato they got you know both You know that's not a real that's not Mr. Potato they got a new thing They got that dual crotch russet they got that dual crotch russet fam And that's chill just say that Like I think some of the articling is just to create a stir

Just say look we got that DCR baby alright we got you know what I'm saying Poppy mommy got that mixed bag but what kid is still playing with a potato I don't know one kid you can get off his iPad long enough to even discuss a vegetable All kids want to know nowadays is Elon Musk their dad Is Elon Musk my dad And if the answers no then they don't it's that's it The rest of their lives they'll spend in therapy wishing he was That's all that's it is Elon Musk my dad

They don't care what kind of fucking crotch the vegetable has If we want to do a toy where they where they get to discuss gender let's do operation That way let the kid build whoever they want This Bobby Sue right here he got the teddy in the root Party on bro you know invite him to the fricking varmits for dog let's do it But let the kid have a say so in it I think Let him let him have operation you got the mustache You got that fricking that wild oyster bro let's do it

That's what I say just let the kid have a little bit of say so in in the thing Or just do transformers if you're going to make something completely open And open toy do transformers they're having there They're kind of asking for it but let the child have a say so in it I think Or do teddy ruckspins do teddy ruckspins he got the cord on the back You know I want waffles you know I thought I was supposed to be a bear You know do teddy ruckspins he got the thing on the back you know Man won't you be my friend you know

My penis has ovaries I'm only five who wants to see my menstrual cycle Let the animal or the kid have a say so in it That's what I think That's what also what do I know I'm not a child If you see me shopping for toys for kids though that's an even bigger issue So when you see people shopping for toys for children And they don't have a children with them and it's December

And it's not December We are way bigger issues than you know gender Gender Genders Gen him Genders Oh man I got to tell you this so I went And first of all I want to say this to you man I want to thank everybody

You know we had an episode last time the Spill the Duntlands episode It was kind of you know it was it gets emotional sometimes and that's just who I am You know and I just want to thank people just nice messages and just People for just being willing to be a part of this Just kind of conversations and things that I don't know I just want to say thanks you know thanks for the support And thank you for the just the just just it's not even thanks it's just like look let's do this You know let's try not to be afraid to figure out what where we are and what's going on

You know we there's so many like little social rules about being alive and our behaviors and I just want to damn be alive man I just want to Know as much about whatever this is this experience And and and and a lot of you do too so thank you Oh I got to tell you this the that's not a commercial either I I went out the other night so Travis Tritt is a folk country I mean it just so many songs you may know where your parents may know So you got to peep that with your ears and and your face it'll be out this weekend

So anyway after the show after we chatted on the episode We got to go out we went out and kid rock Bob Richie who is an adult man who You know I love I was thinking about what did I love about kid rock as a fan as a listener And I just remember being I remember being poor and white and thinking He just was able to kind of express the he was this rap like I mean it was it wasn't country it was like rap rock a bit I want to say rock a bit I don't know I don't know enough about music to know the exact genre And I think it was kind of a new genre it was just this it was something I could fit into you know

I mean or something I could find was just like oh here's a guy who just is It's like a poor white guy who's who's who's angry and brash and I could just relate to a lot of that shit you know because the world I grew up in the environment That I sprouted through was a crass it was crass and it was but it was passionate and it was I don't know Anyway so um live my life in a slow hell and when he did that slow one with Cheryl Crow come on boy Come on and she would sing and you get kind of erect a little and then he would sing you have to fucking cover it up you know God I mean that was just damn that was a lot but anyway so we went out to dinner which was really neat Just to be in the presence of people that are telling stories you'll never get to hear and

And it was just really it was a good time but anyway afterwards we went We're out here in the central east and Kid Rock has an establishment Bob is his name sorry has an establishment And it's a domicile for liquor and music And so we walked over there from the restaurant we're at and dude I've walked with some heroes right some unique humans I've walked with criminals I walked with a buddy of mine that killed somebody And and he said it felt pretty good honestly I But um anyway so we're walking down the street and you start to and it's so it's just drunk people right It's like a French quarter type of vibe when you're walking down the street and and you see people just start to notice Bob

And they start to get I mean people are losing it you know Some guy tried to spell out Bob at a Bob at a bang at a bang boogie he just tried to say he started spelling it out Like a police officer had said all right I need you to recite this you know some girl threw her ovary at him Some girls running for him ran right into a do not park your sign I see some dude crashed his car like Some fellow drank his own blood put a thing in his side of him started just sipping on it dude just walking I mean people were losing their minds and he had like security but it was just I mean people were just Some woman got down and proposed to her husband every person every like space he walked past something insane would happen A window shattered a baby in a stroller probably four months got out of the stroller and just started walking

Walked off his parents are sitting there kind of hugging he's I'm out of here I want to do my own thing I'm looking for my real dad Elon Musk I mean it was just crazy fireworks a dove pulled a magician out of his hat He had a hat on he pulled a magician out the magician was wondering if he's getting his stimulus payment the bird flew off But every moment we went past like people can rock a caterpillar admitted that he was just a cat And it was all just a ruse to meet women with the long you know trying to show him that link show him that body work So it was just you know it was just a fat it was just because look I've I've ridden in cars and arrived at places with people with unique with pomp and circumstance But to shut but to walk not a mile a walk one a one fifteenth of a mile not in someone's shoes but near someone's shoes it was just it was I don't know it was just interesting You know you just it just doesn't happen every day and certainly not to me

I'm going to tell you this though that if you are selling stuff online which is a lot of people these days you know is people say it's dangerous out there To have a broken mortar business you know because of the Corvid people sneaking in sneezing in your window somebody call for exhale on your merchandise It'll kill a grandmother that's what they're saying that's why you need to be in the right business and you need to put your business online Online with ship station that's the right business orders coming in they need to go out fast import orders from any sales channel ship with any carrier No matter where you're selling Amazon Etsy or your own website you know jerk it out function dot com dot org dot tit Whatever ship station funnels all your orders into one simple interface that you can manage from anywhere even your cell phone you see them come in you send them out You'll get access to amazing discounts with major carriers including UPS FedEx USPS the SPCA and I'm just made a joke on that last one Easily compare carriers and choose the best solutions every time with ship station small businesses can now access the same rates reserved for Fortune 500 companies that's important

Fight back against the big dog just use my offer code THEO to get a 60 day free trial that's two months free of no hassle stress free shipping Just go to ship station dot com click on the microphone at the top of the page and type in THEO that's ship station dot com enter offer code Theo make ship happen Look you know I spoke a decent amount of Spanish over my life but nothing that's really put me to that next level Nothing where I've ever made love to a woman or force any even anyone that was formerly a woman Because that's my thing man if I was ever going to be gay and I'd have to at least say hey we was at least a woman once right If you go full dude bro that's that might be too much I think for me for me But I look if you say look you were a chick for a couple years right then you know we can you know we can at least split a dessert Anyway in case you don't speak Spanish or German

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Just go to Babel.com and use promo code T-H-E-O that's B-A-B-B-E-L.com Code Theo for an extra three months for free Babel language for life We also have new merch now available at TheoVon.com Make sure to grab a get that hitter hoodie We got some neat colors we got some neat stuff coming out this year I'm excited about What else? You know we've had a lot of nice calls from you guys I wanted to make sure that I keep this going as well You know we made a goal this year to help out some single moms and do some nice things

So I want to continue that right now because I sip my liquid death This is water too if you like if you it's funny because if you look at the can you think it's a liquor beverage But that's water baby Praise God man But we want to continue that goal this year and see if we can't holler at somebody right here Hello Hey is Karina there? Yes this is her

Hey Karina my name is Theo I work on a podcast and I think you might have spoken with my producer Nick I haven't Oh you didn't No At least I don't remember That's okay Look we've all done some things I'll tell you that Do you work as a corrections officer?

I do sir And you have two kiddos right? I sure do I have two boys Oh dang boys are freaking dangerous I think They are They're wild Are they? Yeah

Yeah something's in them I don't know what's in them Me neither can you tell me Look I have no idea Well someone called then I'm sorry I thought they maybe spoke to you Someone called and just we do a thing I work on a podcast called This Past Weekend And we just do a thing where you know I was raised by a single mom and so sometimes we reach out to single moms and just try and do something nice So we just wanted to reach out and just offer you 500 bucks just to go do something fun with the kiddos whenever you feel like it So

Oh really? Yeah And you don't have to do anything? No us anything You know that's it we just want you to go have just go do something fun with those freaking deviants Yeah oh wow that's really amazing thank you so much for that I really appreciate it Are they pretty violent? No they're pretty calm kids

Oh dang Yeah they're pretty calm kids Well being a corrections officer does that kind of like if they see you in uniform does that add like a little bit of extra edge? I think so They tend to listen more I think I definitely would Look if my mom said I'm gonna put you in time out and she actually meant it like incarcerated I think I would really tighten up as well Yes sir absolutely

Well Karina thanks for being a sweet mom and whoever I don't even know who it was that nominated I'm sorry I just don't have that information But yeah they just said that this lady is really awesome and that yeah and that she would probably like to do something fun So I'll have my producer call you back and just circle up with you Okay alright that sounds great I thank you so much I thank you for what you're doing Oh no worries thank you for just even letting us chat on the phone and I hope you guys have fun And look that money can be used for bail too if those kids are real bad it can be used for bail I put it here sir towards that Okay you guys in case

You guys have a good one Alright you too sir bye bye Karina that's a pretty name I was thinking if I could have a Spanish name and I don't know if that's Spanish but I'm gonna guess it that it is Karina what does it mean let me look that up Karina Meaning Maiden

Means maiden So Karina is it a Spanish name? The name Karina is a nickname Karo That word Karas which means beloved or dear Oh that's sweet Dude that would be wild bro if your mom goes off to prison dude she would be able to handle you easy Could you even fathom that

And imagine getting frisked before you go to bed That would be insane spread them you know You're like I'm just I just brushed my teeth She says spread them but she just needs your teeth she wants to see if you if you brush them or not That'd be pretty funny The hotline baby praise God baby PTL stay ready bro praise God Hidden there The hotline is always is 985-664-9503

I want to see what we got on On the call see what happened man see what's hitting Let's get into um into some of that here we go Yo what's up my name's Damon calling you I live in Everett Washington Dirty Damon up there outside of Everett And I'm sorry for calling you Damon but dirty sometimes with Damon they say dirty Damon You know like Claude they say clean Claude But they don't say clean Damon onward brother

23 years old I just had a quick question So I wanted you to get your opinion on something My girlfriend and I have been trying to spice things up in the bedroom You know oh yeah brother send pics just joking Don't write an article about that some creep Yeah brother I feel you man look When I was 23 baby doing sex was really God I mean I felt like I was just sunbathing on the Lord's front porch

I mean I just felt like my whole body fucking Just was made out of damn just penis meat man I was just so you were just so excited and fired up God remember that I remember somebody would just accidentally bump into me and if If she was cute I'd damp you know I'd dampen that leg baby you feel me onward baby let's hear more brother thank you for calling man Praise God

It's been a while we've been going at it for a while and Time to try some new things so she suggested that we Come up with different characters and act like we're cheating on each other But the problem is I'm not very good at this I mean I come up with characters and I either break character Or I just I don't know don't know what to say And I think it's been a while since I've been in the games You know Burton and trying to pick up girls isn't really strong

But her she's really good at it I mean she's coming up with characters names right off the back Playing them really well and I don't know I just want to be able to give her what she's given me So if you got any advice from me I would love it Thanks for all you do man love the podcast Gang gang see you later bro Thank you man and thank you for the call and for asking me

I mean that's that's first of all that's exciting You're involved in an exciting world where you guys are You know dressing up and doing different Positions or something or whatever you know Costume and all of that that's that booty Halloween When they say let's get you know why don't you do this or do that And it's kind of the one time I feel like if you want to do I wouldn't say if you want to kind of go a little brown face

You might be able to do it in that instance You know if it's just you and your girl And you want to really kind of explore some sexual You know adventurers You know you do something I'm not saying you know get racial but I'm saying you know Maybe some Nescafe or something on the cheeks a little bit of You know I think you could go at least a mocha

And you know My name is no Dante my name is you know You know Corinthian or something you know you could do like You could do a role play like that so it kind of gives you a chance to Learn about other cultures you could read up on some of You know the certain cultures history a black history if you wanted to If you want to go black and you know just approach a girl Maybe you know everything we've been through that kind of stuff

And at least have like a You know have put on some Poetic justice or something in the background or like a Save the last dance or something or Dancers at Wolves I'm trying to think of like a good kind of racially Movie that promote promotes like You know racial love you know So that could be something

You could do Swedish you know Swedish is kind of easy You get a thing of milk a pail of milk and then you run over there and y'all kind of fuck a little But I'm trying to think of something you could do that would be more historical You could maybe do Native American You know and she's like a white woman and you You know sneak in or something sneak in the window You know you you know You don't attack or you you know you tell you leave her a note or something says I'm gonna attack you

You know playing ahead, but you don't just You don't just You know not call for a couple days and then Swing out of the damn cabinet you can't be like Indian in the cupboard you got to be You know Indian in the closet who left a note But I would go full throttle because if anything the one thing it's gonna do This whole thing is just gonna create comfort ability

So many guys would love for their wife Order, you know fiance their French wife or whatever To do a wig, you know to do a you know You know that crotch wig that strap on or probably not that but they would love for their wife to do something unique But they's afraid to say it They're just afraid to say hey honey put on the green wig Borrow Wanda's fucking wig Borrow Wanda's fucking wig

So for seven seconds of my life it could feel You know I could feel that that vibe Like I'm getting up in that UFO you feel me praise God man, but also you could um What am I thinking about I'm just saying when what you if you're starting to create communication dude, that's fire Because then you guys gonna be able to do anything So many of us we just afraid to talk and say this or say that We're afraid of the judgment or what they gonna think or they're gonna tell people

But man to live outside of that fear And to dress up like the damn You know like saving private Ryan or whatever Or you know dress up like damn Jean-Claude Van Damme you and your girl dress up like karate man or something You know and just kick each other to you ejaculate You know there's just You gotta

Think big picture fam So But thank you for that call man I really appreciate it man Let's see what else we got here Let's see what else we got here Hey, what's up to you you guys out of the Central Pennsylvania here

Seth out of Central PA baby And that's Amish country man That's a good place to get that uh You know a strong batch of milk and a little bit of um Peeping tommy Let's hear more Just finished up washing This past weekend number 322

I noticed you know a good part of that you were going in about um You know how you're having a hard time like really getting intimate with other people and loving other people You know on that On that deeper level man and I find I uh Oh yeah I mean when it comes to connection for me it's Man it's often it's in the shallow end of the pool it feels like Especially when it comes in intimacy

I'll be in 3 feet at the Hampton end uh you know Praise God maybe let's hear more daddy face first baby I struggle with that a lot as well and I feel like a lot of that comes down to Um you know like it's hard for me to trust myself sometimes man and I have uh You know I make a lot of progress in my life you know I'm doing well You know I provide for myself I'm doing things that make me happy but You know at the end of the day I just find it very difficult for me to Trust myself in a lot of things and I feel like you I feel like you uh

I feel like you can relate to that to some extent so I guess the Question I have for you is uh you know what what do you do in your own life Or rather what could you do in your own life to You know build a better relationship with yourself so you can You know trust yourself in whatever situation no matter how bad a gift I got you brother much love gang gang Gang player gang man thank you for uh For taking the time to call man

Yeah trust in yourself man as you're talking I'm thinking One One thing I do sometimes that doesn't Help me I said a lot of boundary You know I said a lot of boundary man like uh I mean just like a fence worker I said I said a lot of strange rules Like I'll go for a run and at the end I'm like alright man Running every day now next 30 days we're gonna do it

We're gonna do it I'll reach into a tree and just grab a raccoon out of it and just choke it out Did you hear me huh stripes So then now I got this rule and I gotta run for the next 30 days Then I forget that I have that plan The next day comes I don't run but my brain will remind me Man you didn't run Hey hey hey

It waits till I literally laid out you didn't run did ya Or all did it like when you're gonna run When you're gonna run huh Day two day two So I'll let myself down but it's just because I make all these rules it'll be everything I'll bite into a tomato it's like oh salad only 30 days Salad only Jesus The next morning I wake up and have a waffle you know

And there's two in a little pack but I only have one but still And my brain's like oh man there's too much of salad only you know Guess I'll just be a glutton and just probably die early you know So anyway I start to not trust myself because I make I constantly make these different rules for myself That are impossible to live up to the number I make of them There's no that's called unrealism So when I do that then I start to not trust myself because I've made so many little rules that I've broken But I never stop making the rules so there's no way I could do it

Let me hear a little bit more again about what you asked starting to be clear I'm that deeper level man and I find I struggle with that a lot as well And I feel like a lot of that comes down to you know like it's hard for me to trust myself sometimes man And I have you know I make a lot of progress in my life You know I'm doing well you know I provide for myself I'm doing things that make me happy So another place where I still have some issues about trusting myself is um You know when like I will find this I'll call like a lot of my friends in recovery and One thing that's interesting about people in recovery or who have ever been in recovery or spent time in it

Once you once somebody you connect with that person you connect with them on a level It's a real level it's different than the other video game levels you're on with regular humans This you straight to Bowser You know so it's uh there's just a real connection Um so I will call a lot of my friends in recovery Al will just say hey man am I am I okay Is everything okay you know just tell me everything's okay please I'll do that man I'll do it three times a week Hey man I'm okay right I mean out of the blue

Hey Alan what's up man hey Dickie how are you dawg yeah I'm all dude I just I'm okay aren't I So I it's hard I never had I just didn't have and I'm not complaining I'm not like upset you know Sometimes I get a little perturbed but when I was young or whatever happened I don't know I just There was never a voice saying everything's okay everything's gonna be okay you're okay You're fine we're fine everything's gonna be fine There was a lot of other commotion where things I didn't know if they were gonna be fine So then still to this day that's like uh there's always still this invisible commotion going around all the time You know um so it's hard for me to then trust myself a lot of times because I don't even know that everything's okay

So if I go for two or three days without hearing man it's okay it's like damn I start to just not trust myself because like well how could I can't make any more decisions right now I don't even know if everything's okay so I don't know if that makes any sense bro but It's also hard to trust yourself when you don't even you feel like you don't know yourself You know a lot of those spaces make it so hard to make decisions from Like man if I do this am I gonna be okay While other people are just doing this doing that doing coke juggling not no concerns Just totally fucking ripping full sin confidence

Uh but one of the byproducts is that of that is that you think sometimes thinking a lot is helpful it's nice Your brain can be really kind of thoughtful at times because you think a lot So um and it gets better as you get a little bit older daddy I promise you that but the shit can be intense I think the one cure for it is something I haven't enacted very well in my life And I do believe that it's meditation Um but also what do I know bro you know what I'm saying I'm just a semi-white fam Praise God dog and RIP Billy Comforto man You know I got a couple of messages about him the other day and uh we're gonna try to get that bench put up over there near Laplace Louisiana

In his hometown where he hit that final in bank and called it quits and got drafted in the first round by God Um you see in the notes anything else I wanted to make sure I got to Uh oh if you know a single mom Uh that could use some support Try not to tell her so we can make it a surprise Um you know I was raised by a single mother I know that it's tough I know that money doesn't solve any problems Uh but I just think sometimes money's just energy

It's just saying here's some some energy that came my way let's put it your way So just when I think about a mom having just a little extra spending money to do something nice for her kiddos I imagine that makes moms feel real good You know there's something I've never had seen this because I don't have any children's but you see a parent and they just see And when their kid is having fun you see they just it's almost like they're they're the remote control and they put in the right codes or whatever And now they're just watching it play out well or something So yeah that's really some of the goals not to really think we're neat or anything it's just to try and do some little You know what can we do so them little boys have a extra fun day and they don't have to know it has anything to do with that

They don't know us them boys ain't podcasting they fucking looking for the devil So but if you know one hit the hotline [phone] We also want to continue our series of interviews with real hard-working people with interest in occupations We're currently searching for a Catholic nun or Baptist nun even I went to last Baptist over there off of Jefferson A pest control or animal control worker and an Amish or Mennonite If any of our listeners know someone they think would be perfect for the podcast fill out a contact form at theovon.com Or hit up the voicemail hotline And thank you guys so much for just being a part of our lives man

What else oh a Seattle woman finds a kilo of cocaine in crochet kit she bought at thrift shop So Seattle woman finds one kilo of cocaine in a croquet croquet crochet crochet kit at thrift shop That kilo damn dog at a croquet shop boy call me kilo and stitch fam Knit me up that gator tail baby we making booty movie son come on that albino giraffe neck daddy you feel me That dust back lizard fam that chunky that Colombian bam bam Feliz Navi damn call me the power company cuz I'm lit If you find a kilo of cocaine with some knitting stuff freakin sew me up a gram mama Okay knit me that hit crochet me that yay boy I'm talking about knit that hit crochet that yay you feel me

Sew me up a pile of toot boo boo All right I'm talking about that Scottish Airlines that Hollywood breakfast baby Damn I need to go to Goodwill boy who's your dealer Goodwill Damn the woman purchased the kit to crochet animal hats animal hats bitch Dude I'll be fucking doing that rhino you know that fucking white nose baby you feel me let's go But when the crochet hobbyist opened the kit she found a suspicious package that was encased in yellow rubber with 100% written on it The item also gave off an odd odor odd odor baby that ain't an odd odor that's that God odder baby And that thing's trying to swim up your snout boo boo come on

Police did not say how the crochet kit and narcotics ended up at the thrift shop Well look unfortunately in America a lot of these workers they're under tight schedules And you know what I'm saying bro freaking toot me up a scarf baby Wolf me up a damn freaking set of mittens son You know it's just you know desperate times of cry or desperate measures baby and that's it People doing toot just to get through a damn afghan brother Even women been through enough man praise God bro Damn so lucky man I never found nothing like that

I remember once we got a baby crib for my cousin and they had a house arrest bracelet in it So but nothing like this I mean this is just damn just lucky Man we can all be winners you know that come on Uh what else do we have going on here let me see let's do one more call that came in man ACO it's your guy Flynn I'm San Antonio What's up Flynn named after Errol Flynn I'm guessing And Errol Flynn played uh I think he was Robin Hood in the 1900s Let's hear more

I'm just taking a walk with my dog it's a frigid 30 degrees we're getting a little bit of fleet out here That uh wannabe snow kind of thing Oh yeah well look the real snow obviously is at the damn thrift shop son you know what I'm saying bro Gang onward brother thanks for calling And uh I was just hearing you talking about how you didn't want to let us down You know you have some viewers who are in programs doing rehab or staying sober trying to stay sober And you feel like you don't want to let them down Yeah man um yeah we touched on that on the last solo episode about uh drinking and um

And yeah like having a not a responsibility but yeah just feeling hard to share And maybe some responsibility um onward By uh by kind of coming on with your own with your own failures your own woes And I'm just I just wanted to say man that you don't have to worry about that We're all here for you you're here for us it's a little family we got going on here Um I have anxiety uh Tourette's I have ADHD you know you name it any of the acronyms I probably got it You know what I mean but we're all here just doing the best we can with what we got And uh I wouldn't fault yourself for cutting back or flacking on your sobriety as long as you realize that

Where you want to be and where you're going and how that intersects with what you got going on now So just keep pushing towards that positive future keep being you and keep keeping us in the loop Thanks for everything man have a good one Thanks man uh yeah I appreciate that man I appreciate uh the sentiment and the call and um and the support Um Yeah I just want to do my best to just be as uh I just want to do my best to say to kind of say what's going on You know I want to be able to work from a place of that's kind of as Not as like real as I can be just like as up to date as I can be and um I don't know but thank you for saying that man

That's nice you to say and uh and I appreciate it Um Yeah it's a lot of people's you know it's just a lot of this kind of stuff is a journey You know um it's just scary man it's so scary when you see the kind of stuff that can happen when people really struggle And I don't know I've never thought that I've had problems with alcohol um ever Uh but yeah it's just that risk of getting too far Uh you know next thing you know you wolf in tune and you in a damn electric chair or something Or just a regular chair hell either way you still just wolfed out on that freaking jack London bro you know um

Um And it's just yeah you see people that get to a wild let you know it's just I don't know I had a friend that uh that died the other day of uh an overdose and that's scary to hear You know it's just scary to hear uh And it's just so final and you wonder like if you stay in the best way you can be what little You know are you more are you sober enough then and where you make an extra call to a friend And you don't save their life or nothing but you just you're one little more little moment that keeps them Because I get those moments from people people hit hey man I you know a buddy will call and just

Check in hey man I'm just calling to let you know this or just those little things that like Just get your day and know a better space you know and just those little pieces that make you feel Like people care you know it's um and I think a lot of it is we do a lot of our caring now on social media So it's not care that people really feel or hear or it so it doesn't have that residual effect I feel like Um as it used to kind of but what do I know uh but what I do know is I appreciate your call man And that's nice you to even think of me and and to think to call you know yeah I was kind of Scared to talk about it but um it was scarier to be in a but also I didn't want to be in a place where I Uh was kind of not living a lie I didn't feel like I was living a lie I just felt like I just wanted to try and

Be just transparent um what else do we got here man here we take this What's up the oh you little dust bear Amen what's up this is Brady calling I just moved to Salt Lake from Colorado a few months ago and um It's the first time I've been living by myself it's been hard to say the least Oh yeah living by yourself is tricky man Because you'll get pissed somebody left the dishes in the sink um but it's always you who did it You did it So um but I've been really struggling with my sobriety and uh

Especially with COVID you know that's like it's really hard to find meetings and um Going to these online meetings isn't the same at all So I was just looking for some tips you know how do I cope with my alcoholism Without being able to go to real life meetings man I don't know I'm struggling I've just been uh drinking a lot and I know it's not the right thing to do but It's easier said than done you know what I'm saying Anyway I don't want to be a Debbie Downer but uh I love your podcast Thanks Brady uh I appreciate it man you're not a Debbie Downer dog I mean you just we do what we can

You know just like the fella that just called in here man you know um we just do what we can Call somebody else you check on them I cannot believe sometimes that there hasn't been more of an outrage From the recovery community to reinstate meetings in person You don't have to agree with me but it is baffling to me the number of It's baffling to me the connection that is created through in person meetings Um and how that is not just like a top story almost every day of how we are missing that throughout this pandemic And I wonder how many more people we've lost to addiction um and some of the byproducts of that

Uh and I would bet it rivals I would bet it rivals I'll tell you this this is a true statement I personally know more people that have overdosed or relapsed and lost their life in the past year Than I do people that have lost their life from COVID That's facts personally no personally I have four I have four friends that have lost their life in the past year from drug and alcohol relapsing Or use overdosing um I know one person who had COVID when they died That's just me um

So I don't know um but anyway man I didn't mean to get away from what you're asking for Brady or what you're asking about We just stick together man look I don't want those zoom meetings either they fucking suck But they also suck if I say that they suck they also everything sucks if I say that it sucks So some of it I have to try and put on me I gotta find a local guy to spend time with you know Um I gotta have other people to check in with and I need to check in with others You know a lot of times like I'm gonna call this person my brain will be like are they'll be calling I'm like don't answer it dude just do your own shit Nah answer it You know answer it

Um You know we lost a comedian about a week ago And I don't want to talk out of school but he struggled man this guy struggled at a level that was um man he struggled I think he was the He was one of the two funniest people I'd ever seen on stage kill a crowd Were him and Joey Diaz Kill a crowd Actually I'll add in I'll add in

Crystallia and I'll add in earthquake Um kill Really kill a crowd and uh And his name is Eric Myers and he um And I just say this because I want I just want his name to be said and I want it to be heard and uh He died in Texas a week ago he Um apparently relapsed and uh was walking on the freeway Or the interstate late at night and was hit by a vehicle

A van actually Jesus oh I'm getting hit by car sounds away actually or getting hit by a van to both sound bad Actually car sounds worse I think than van because van like it's all You know one point of kind of Um but uh You know he was supposed to come on here a couple Months ago he was in Memphis five weeks ago maybe He was in Memphis and we were messaging

And he was going to come here to be a guest on the podcast and I said don't come man Like it's just I felt bad he was going to have to come you know four hours or something I think he was taking the bus and I just said we'll do it later We'll do it when I'm down near you in Florida where he lived Um And it just bones me out like I just I don't know Maybe if I had been in the space where I was just more like yes

Yes saying yes to things you know or just in my maybe if my spirits have been Not that I would have saved him or done anything but we just would have had a time you know he just Maybe there would have been one extra moment of somebody saying yes I care you know welcome Come in you know be a part of Uh So Man he struggled man

So one day get someone in here who knows a lot of the stories Of Eric Myers He had a unique voice Hollywood missed him They missed him He was just I mean he was from another planet I would see him in Baton Rouge we would work together Right in the middle of the hook

And you gotta do comedy and they're doing cracking they're fucking Oysters and slaughtering octopus or octopi right next to you You fucking telling a joke and they're telling an octopus his last Rights you know they're over there electric electric chair And you trying to rattle off a riddle You know to go second. I did not want to go second because that means I had to go after him. And he came down to Baton Rouge once and I would see him in Texas.

Anyway, he was just really talented. Sorry, I'm just kind of rambling and just kind of lamenting at the same time. But I hope you go check out his stuff. He has a special on YouTube that was, I think, shot at the laugh factory or somewhere. But man, he was so good. But man, he battled with the devil. I mean, he just had it inside of him. So anyway, sorry to be such a downer. Look, I'm sorry to be the downer here. But Brady, how do I state? I just the only thing that I know, which hasn't always kept me sober, but it has kept me alive, is that I try to communicate with others. And contrary action, you don't feel like doing something, do it.

When you don't do it, that's the thing. You'll surprise yourself and you'll realize how much you're capable of. But I'm not trying to preach at you, man. I love you, bro. And keep your head up, dog. And praise God, man, gang shit. All right. I think we got to the end of this episode pretty decently. We made it anyway. That's important. And we'll close out on this. Thank you guys as always. And if you're struggling, keep your head up and be good to yourself. Be good to someone else. Just don't feel alone. But yeah, the separation that this whole thing has caused. It's a lot. It's a lot, man. So if you know somebody that struggled, go spend some time with them. Give them that extra call. A little thing to something thinking of you. And you know,

make a plan with them. Anyway, y'all be good to yourselves, man. We'll go out on Matthew Cosial all runs in the family. By the wicked watched in the mud. Can't save my soul so let the folly flood. I wear the cloth that I'm cut from. It's just a matter of time. And there ain't no stop in the setting sun. Can't watch the scene from the head. Maybe can I run with runs in the family? Runs in the family. Got that hitter right here, baby. You can cut me down with the roots run deep.

I ain't gonna die when they bury me. Crown of my father's out of my feet. You can pray for mercy, but it won't come cheap. I wear the cloth that I'm cut from. It's just a matter of time. There ain't no stop in the setting sun. Can't watch the scene from the head. Maybe can I run with runs in the family?