This Past Weekend - E350 John Crist

Episode Date: July 22, 2021

John Crist is an American comedian from Lilburn, Georgia. Theo talks with John about what it was like coming up as a Christian comedian, they tell their first childhood Playboy stories and discuss the most important things they each took with them from being in rehab. Subscribe to John's YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/johnbcrist Tickets for John Crist's "Fresh Cuts Comedy Tour" - https://johncristcomedy.com/calendar/ New Tour Dates! Get Your Tickets Today! https://theovon.com/tour Merch! https://theovonstore.com Podcastville mugs and digital prints available now at https://theovon.pixels.com Music: “Shine” - Bishop Gunn https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F3A_coTcUek  Support our Sponsors: AcreGold: https://getacregold.com/theo The Zebra: https://thezebra.com/theo BlueChew: https://bluechew.com  promo code THEO Keeps: https://keeps.com/theo  Submit your funny videos, TikToks, questions and topics you'd like to hear on the podcast to [e-mail] Hit the Hotline [phone] Video Hotline for Theo Upload here: http://bit.ly/TPW_VideoHotline Find Theo: Website: https://theovon.com Instagram: https://instagram.com/theovon Facebook: https://facebook.com/theovon Facebook Group: https://facebook.com/groups/thispastweekend Twitter: https://twitter.com/theovon YouTube: https://youtube.com/theovon Clips Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCiEKV_MOhwZ7OEcgFyLKilw Producer: Nick Davis https://instagram.com/realnickdavis Producer: Sean Dugan https://www.instagram.com/SeanDugan/ See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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love you and I want to let you know that the tour He's still unnamed. I'll name it soon by next week. I think I'll have a name for it But it's coming to st. Louis Cincinnati good places Charlotte Durham Chattanooga Knoxville Wilmington you want to get out there in Wilmington where people are a lot of milk maids out there Wilkes by

Minneapolis Charleston Richmond Baltimore over there the black main they call it Portland Burlington Albany Buffalo Columbus, Ohio as well the The Netflix taping those shows are sold out in Nashville. Thank you so much for the support and I will be running that material in Huntsville a few days prior That is the first week of August you can get tickets for any date at Theo Vaughn comm slash tour

Don't buy through any other link. It's a scam They's jacked up prices. I Try to keep tickets at fair prices for you Today's guest is a friend of mine a decent man and a man who has walked the road of He's walked a very Common road when it comes to humor and and that's a road of struggle He's become a better friend of mine over the past year and we have a lot in common and we're gonna get into some of that and And and just talk turkey about to embark on his fresh cuts comedy tour. It is

Mr. John Chris Lord's liquid right there, bro. It ain't nothing to it Liquid death man. I don't know if I'd want to go with a dry death or a liquid death to die Now, what do you do now? You have a you got a real religious kind of history, you know Tell me about that. Like how do you kind of because sometimes? Sometimes I feel like you get Not penciled in with religion. Yeah, yeah, but you almost you know Matthew Mark Luke and John Chris, you know Like it's not shocking to hear that they were like or if I did that joke in my show

You'd be like, oh, this is like his like this is part of the thing. You're right, but What I mean if you well if you live in America, let's say an average person's because I grew up in church my dad's pastor I was homeschooled really at home school. They're one of eight kids Wow, so when you so did your dad teach any of the courses or in homeschooling is the what is the the mother? The mom teaches the mom. Well in today. Well, see there's two types of homeschool. There's like homeschool like if you're Serena Williams and you want to be Professional football or you want to be professional tennis player? I'll just homeschool so I can and then there's like the cultural homeschoolers Those are like long jean skirts

Christian traditionally, that's a different type of homeschool like pail of water. Yeah, that's it Here's like where they go when they go for it, but they got one right? Yeah books around a belt, you know Yeah, yeah that type of stuff. Yeah, very Willie and Nellie Olson from little house in the prairie Like is that how we go? Yeah, like no not really, but sure. Yeah. Yeah, so with homeschooling man So your mother homeschooled you yeah, did your dad did does the dad's come up with the curriculum? Where did they get the curriculum? It's You like have a like a there's like a there's like a group. They have like their homeschool like textbooks It's like but but you buy all the textbooks But then you use them eight times because my brother

Did it and then I do it two years later and then the little brother, but all the like a math problem would be like I'm wish I was making this up, but I'm not like I in Matthew 4. He had five loaves and two fish subtract Three loaves How many you they're all like the they're about the Bible, right? Oh, it's not like a train was traveling 60 miles an hour. It's like a caravan of donkey is going to see the North Star Okay, so suddenly like gets it in there. You know say like we'll slide the Bible in what so they'll sneak some facts in, huh? That's true. Dang, we'll get it. Yeah, we'll teach them dude one way or another. Did you guys like at?

Halloween because I dated a girl for a little bit. No Halloween in my house to from Nashville, right? Yeah Yeah, she at Halloween. They were only allowed to dress up as characters from the Bible. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah Yeah, she was growing up. Well, so Do you know what she dressed us? I don't know who she dressed as I think it was one of the women in it Yeah, yeah, here's the thing about the vibe. There's not a dude heavy. Yeah, they're all written by dudes Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, and they educated guys, which is a little Brenda should have got a yeah, she's at least a book. Hey, this is how I say, you know, I used to have a joke in my show about There was a story in the Bible about Jesus and the prostitute. That's the that's the heading of the story

Uh-huh, and you know the prostitute she gets her sins forgiven and she gets saved all this kind of stuff. She's In heaven now, this is my bid but like she's like, yo, what's up? My name's like Cheryl are like who I'm like The price. Oh, what's up? Like she didn't she get a name. Wow. She gets no name So in the Bible, they didn't even give her a name. No, but there's a double. That's not gender specific There's like Jesus and the male leprosy. You're like, he's like dude. I had a nice job. I had a family I right I had more than leprosy But for the book, it's like we just need you to be leprosy. We need you to be leprosy one

There's no, uh, we need prostitute one. We need leprosy one What's the call when you do a TV show and then the somebody's in the background doing something like hey, can you oh, yeah? Release there. There was no release at the back in the Bible times about leprosy guys like hey, we're just gonna right We're just gonna take your story, bro. And leprosy was pretty popular. I think for a while You know if you were if you were if you had it it was It was bad. No, you're out. You can't oh you can't party with leprosy. No, no, no But I don't even know if that's how it was transmitted but that in you know, they're just like you're cast out if you got the I don't know. What is it? What do you think it is a scab or something party?

I think it was like a little something and then your whole body got like your leg would fall off You would shed a limb. Yeah, you want to look at a police on leprosy bring up a limb shedding What is it? But that when you talk about something bad in the Bible like dude, he probably probably had leprosy Infectious Z is called Bob Basilis So I don't know who he is that who it is. Is he uh transmitted via droplets? That sounds familiar. Yeah Nose from the nose of the mouth dude. No masks back then bro. Wow The Basilis is likely transmitted via droplets. Yeah, it's curable with therapy There were there were

202,000 registered cases of leprosy in 2019. Yeah, what if you called a girl? Hey, I can't come over tonight Why not? I got leprosy That would it be like I mean it says right there 202,000 It's plausible, but it's not I guess it doesn't it's not a death sentence now. It's plausible But if you if you were like you walking into something and you rolled an ankle back in the Bible, you're like, that's it That's it. That's it. If you roll the net. Yeah, like you walking with a limp the rest of your that's it Well, we forget, you know, I

Will romanticize things a lot of times and think man, you know it'd be so nice to be on a carriage with my wife or with some like, you know, yeah Yeah, and like old times like old times. I'll do that a lot. Yeah Yeah, and then you start to think like what old times were really like and it was probably pretty sad tough Well, you don't even have to go back that far to like if you think about like dude when you were a kid Remember going to pick someone up at the airport You just like I hope they're here. Oh, yeah, and you'd go around Circle back around you like maybe they're here this time, right? And then you would just there was no check-in. Just there's no flight tracker

There's no cell phones. You just When you would keep going. Yeah, maybe you stay for 30 minutes and then if you were there with your dad He'd send you in hey run in there and see on the on the screen. Yeah, it's here and But you don't even know if he got on it, right because you can't call but it was also so much fun I feel like to just go do anything then it was like everything was kind of like an adventure It was like all right Let's go we're going to pick up our friend from the airport You know what's gonna happen, right?

They were gonna go up there to meet some so until in the movie theater. Maybe but maybe not He might not be there if your date didn't show like you really got stood up Like you like there was no way to like know why or this a is they could lie It was easy next time they saw they could lie But remember when I remember I told you a couple days ago about when you I Didn't get a text back from me and then I your it went to green and I was like That's a red alert in 2021 right but back then he'd be like He'll turn back up and so you're like even he missed a week couple weeks of school. What happened to him?

Yeah, and you show back up. What's up? He's around. Yeah, I don't know. He's cutting the grass. Yeah, where'd he been? Yeah, you don't know no now I can be so much such a mystery then they there were so many that's better But now it's like the like, you know girls be like hey, I noticed you don't watch my Instagram stories anymore You're like, oh my okay We're we know too much. Yeah, when you say that like oh now it's definitely like oh, I saw you like on your Instagram about I don't need to probably know that yeah, and you can't hide anymore. You can't like I used to love to be able to Make things up back in the day. You can make up who your family

You can't anymore you could say you were a prince you could make up anything You're like you're a prince, dude, you know, you couldn't you could fact check anything small big bird Sweatshirt little questionable like a prince would wear that what you moved here to Louisiana. Yeah, but it's kind of like We had a transfer situation, but they were like, all right. Yeah, it was an exchange program at the castle That's like dude in you know in rehab you can't you can't no one knows you don't have any phones or nothing So no one knows that you can make up stuff there, right because this guy said he keeps from India And he's like he had like this is true actually like 37 like Not servants at his house, but 37 people worked at his house. No way and you're like

That's a different but you don't know anybody's name. They don't know their whole name Oh, if I was any in my be like Chuck, right? You're like, I don't know. He might yeah, I don't know Chuck has 37 people before Damn Chuck's heart is up Here's a question right here from somebody that came in Theo Vaughan's my favorite comedian in the whole world. It's more choice, brother Let's go Chris is my wife's favorite comedian in the whole world I would like the wife like the universe is about to implode

How'd you guys connect? Was it the national thing? Did you guys know about each other coming up? And John, what's it like for you to be on Theo's podcast? Like is this it for you? You're gonna blow now. It's like the big This is not gonna blow me dude. You know what I'm saying? No, no, no, I mean I'm not trying to knock it or anything, but okay first of all we got to hang with that guy that everything about that I Don't know the guy shirtless He's like before I get to my question

I need to get some I need to be involved and right we had a lot of backstory So now I get nervous and take my shirt off when I do stuff. I don't like to be shirtless. You don't mmm I just got to make sure you're my body's positioned right when you're shirtless. Oh really when you're sitting up like this You know, I'm saying you don't look good. Oh, that's you know, it's like your body looks a little yeah That's like I don't like I've been drinking step that yeah Yeah, I wonder who came up some of the came up with shirts of a hey, we got a I I wonder why it all goes back to I think how like I like even romanticizing what things used to be like Like it was probably so hot people were so stinky. Yeah, that's the thing. You don't realize someone was horrible

No, people were stinky people were dying like hey, do you want to marry? You know, uh, you got to go down to the river. It might be three and a half miles away. I want to marry Sarah. Yeah There wasn't any options for marriage. I was like, do you want to marry Margaret because that's who you are There was no like that's why they say like hey, there's only you know, very very like a religious Christian There was like you're there you have a soulmate one person on this planet For you that God has a plan for you to find this woman one person on planet Earth There's seven billion people, right and it happened to be the girl that lives two doors down Wow, no this girl actually worked in my office. She worked in your office

And you Billion people on earth and the girl that was God's plan for you worked in your office. Y'all are lucky Then God had the easiest Yo, that's a hookup dude you found her just you didn't even have to go man you barely Let me leave the state. You have to leave the neighborhood. She was right there You can't really say that's like not very romantic to say that there's a bunch of women that would be good for you Well, I marry but that's would be true, right? Well, I don't know like how many do you think would be a good?

Marriage partner for you. Let's say I think I'm a loose nugget. Okay. I'm no loose nugget. So you might cut down and you might do 5,000 in America in the world in the world. Oh, wow Good amount 5,000 but then if you say babe, you're the only one for me. She's like, I mean That's a hefty promise, but it used to be of reliable But it used to be a fair promise to make I think to someone that you're the one for me in now Part of the problem is is there's so many ones. Well, there's also so many like a bill There's so much capability to get access. It's like, you know, they say you're only as

Capable as your options or whatever like you don't yeah. Yeah, all of a sudden you get some money your Sphere kind of you get outside of the neighborhood a little bit, right? Yeah, all of a sudden you got a driver's license Now you can right and go to the next time you could get across town. You could touch Chitty cross town Back in the day, you really that's it you had your did you ever like Intermix with the other high schools like it or do you just kind of hang in your high school? No, I would hang at the other high schools because I ended up switching from one school to another in the same town In two different towns. They were totally different one was like a real country town Yeah, I grew up in and one was a little bit more like suburban. You know, you're wealthy white of them

Yeah, well when I got to the fancier one, that's the first time a girl ever liked me And so it was I had like a new beginning when what you what age what you what grade? Seven eight nine ten grade. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I remember walking across the gym and some girl was looking at me I thought something happened to me. You know what I'm saying? Like you might have glowed up. Yeah, I had a summer. You might have a glow up some I might have man your braces off or something No, I need it. So it must have been like this kind of make-a-wishy type Yeah, yeah, yeah, but her name was Jenny. I remember she was hot, man And she looked at you. She looked that was the first time you ever remember a girl looking at you like in a way

Dude, and I can still feel her looking at me. That's how that's how nice it was Yeah, yeah, yeah to be admired by a woman. You might have been we were still chasing that oh my beat I think I'm still chasing an admiration. Did we answer the other guy's question was a question? I mean we met I think I mean I've known about you over the years, but I've seen you more Oh, I know when I know where I met you We've talked about this before at the punchline in Atlanta, and I did a guest spot for you. Did you really? Yeah Oh, you were wearing sweatpants. You were wearing elastic sweatpants. I go this man is unhinged. Oh, wow You were just you came in you're like what up? Oh, that's what dude was crazy about now with me and you and then is like

we ate Like that when no one knew who we were right no one was like trying like we were trying to Hang with fans like we were trying they were like now. We good remember those days. Oh, yeah We would be like what are y'all doing right and no would it be like yeah, we're good Yeah, and that wasn't that long ago like I got a family man. I got a future They were like hey y'all like drinkers, and they're like no dude. We like we like like your hamster bone story We gotta go Yeah, dude, we want to find us. You get a couple free hams out here. Yeah

Dude, they had good pie at that place. Yeah, they had a great pie great pie the new punch line Yeah, the new punch line, but it but but What's funny about that guy's comment is that which is always happens like you're my favorite comedian and I'm his wife's favorite comedian Oh, it's like that. That's very common for you and I were at that bar one night. Remember yeah, and some guy said Didn't some guy my wife. Yeah. Yeah, my wife loved you which I don't is that good or bad. I don't know I would trade you I was joking with that guy specifically. I mean maybe not knowing his wife not even know it You're like sight unseen. That's a good call. I'll take it. Oh, well, you know Ralphie May Ralphie May said alright P. He said women

Are the ones that that you know if you have like a little like a sexist like misogynistic joke people are like yeah Like first of all women make the decision to come see you guys will come But no like, you know those real like old-school type comics that were very like like That's not a thing and it like women are driving the sales and if you're cool To women you're that's like, you know like only exclusively dude comics, you know that any of those guys There are crowds of audience is male yours. Yeah. Yeah, so What do you think from like that like the fighting stuff? No, I think just from podcasting is talking about stuff Being alive a lot of my audience is just men that are trying to be alive trying to live

I think yeah, do you know if you're looked at your Instagram like you're the breakdown? Yeah, I'm like 80% Men I'm the exact opposite really that is wild. No exact opposite Which I got a little bit. I feel a little bit I feel some kind of way about that, but you feel some kind of way about yours No, I feel honestly, I just feel grateful that I found that I have some sort of connection with an audience Yeah, so I think that that's really the most important. That's that's kind of what feels like that I mean, yes, I think every comedian wishes. There was like a bunch of big juggy breath, bro That you look at your demographics and they have photos of this or this is it some rusty muppets in the front

Yeah, you know what I'm saying? I don't think yeah, maybe but The big dude, I remember the biggest breasts. I ever saw as a kid was on this buddy on a guy on a guy Dude, I remember even touching myself to him once when I was young because it was the only ones we had at that age He's but what you saw him. Oh, dude. Yeah, he's sure with them out. What do you mean out? He slept with him, you know shirtless or I think it was real hot. He was at that weight where it gets real hot Yeah, it gets hot easily. Oh, yeah, he's at that hot weight, dude. You'd see is uh You know you'd see the and yet dude his dad had done the ceiling fan in his room and this thing was Illegally powered. Yes. I was on high

And you'll turn it off. It doesn't turn off. Yeah, just yeah, there's no all you see those ones that are like It's not gonna fall off. It's like This one smelled very I think it ran on kerosene or something. It was really it was authentic, man But I remember the wind would cool would almost put a redness on tint on his skin Okay, yeah, and he would rest and I remember one time was being of age at his house to be erect and just And he was he was asleep. Thank God. I hope you were sleeping in the same room with this man Yeah, or he was uh, yeah, yeah, yeah, and I would don't call him a man. We're both boys. Okay. Yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah, cuz I don't want to be some boy masturbating to a man

Yeah, well, you know when you were like Well when you were like young You were like you wanted to I wanted to be like me and my buddies would like like streak through the neighborhood Yes, and it was cool to be like with your clothes off. Yeah Really, yeah, yeah, no, no, no, it was very like and that's the tricky like when we like in rehab You kind of do your like your sexual history. Mm-hmm. They talk about that kind of stuff like what's the first time? You had like a sexual Anything oh really and I remember when I was I had to be seven or eight this older girl

Came to babysit us. Oh, and I we were playing freeze tag and I tagged her on the boob, but I didn't know you know I Didn't know I didn't know much I didn't know why I wanted to do that, but I just did did you so after you did it Did you feed did it feel like something believable? Yeah, and I don't know and that That's God, but I don't it might be that's that's the way everyone's here Everyone is here because of that right everybody's here because of sex, right? So it's interesting that sex becomes this taboo thing

That's what yeah, like Louis CK had a bit when he came through Zaini's like two three weeks. Did you go watch him? Yeah, yeah, he said I was at a town you No, we take things too far and people do stuff that's across the line But he said you everyone wants to live in a world where Sarah at your high school went What's up with Theo? Yeah, you right? Yeah, and now you don't want to go be touching people inappropriately they're going across But you want to live in a world where I guess someone goes I wonder what she's up to yeah, yeah, right? Yeah, and what's her name? You know Steph Curry. Yeah. Yeah, so his wife man. Yeah grown man his wife

You know before kids when he was coming in the league She said she would always walk through you know the you know the hallways and people would holler at her and be like What's up, and then she she said she had two kids kind of like got a little bit older. She said I miss People like kind of cat calling yet. No, no again not not inappropriate, you know, but you like Let's not act like that world doesn't exist right right I mean it's flattering, huh? What's up? Like I wonder what I want to talk to her right that whatever that is some see a sense of attraction Yeah, yeah, we all want to be wanted

Yeah, in some way and then I don't think it's weird to be You know to be wanted sexually kind of you know at all really it's but and it also is the most natural thing like I get a feeling sometimes in my body That every part of me wants to climb out of my penis You know you got to go inward first and right yeah, I literally have a feeling sometimes like I just get this like yeah This tense energy that everything I Have or am yeah wants to like if my whole body could fly out of my penis Yeah, just disappear then and I'm done. Yeah, we had a good run

You know and that and I feel like I'd be okay with that happen to Theo, you know what it's a long story, but he won Yeah, he's on top. Yeah, he's with the Lord. He went out. We wanted to go out Because it's also interesting if that's the way that you went out. It'd be like an inverse of the way that you came in in a weird way Yeah, yeah, yeah, because everybody came into this world the same way. Yeah, and he was that's the that's the real Lion King That's a circle of life right there, right? Yeah, it should be some guy masturbating off a cliff You know what I'm saying, but somebody else catching in taking care of it well if you were like That because they

They would talk about how like is it like a is this like when you were like, you know When you were with your buddies and you're like, let's like sleep naked or something like that Yeah, they were like was that inappropriate and they were like no that was just a Boy, yeah, yeah, yeah, and they were like they want to make a distinction between because if there if it There's a little bit graphic not really but like if it's two boys being curious Versus a boy and an uncle because he knows right and then that's a problem

That's trauma right when you have the now when one of them when one of them knows and is trying to do a thing Versus if it's like because and then kids get in trouble for stuff that is just curious, right? Don't put that in the same category because then that shame comes in right? Oh, I thought I was you're supposed to be a Christian And you're streaking like that's it right kind of what you're like you're gonna go jump in the girls pool and you're gonna That's kind of just But that's a tough line because then sometimes it can Yeah, switch it. Oh, I don't think that was That wasn't appropriate right can switch. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I mean some of that stuff's tricky dude

I remember a baby said my Some family members one time or semi family and the kids over there in the bed, you know naked with his little buddy You know two boys. Yeah, and so I just I didn't say nothing to him or make him feel weird or anything You know, I didn't I also didn't go in and tickle him at that moment You know what I'm saying? It's like you got to know when to tickle people and when it just let them be you know That's they say how do you know? I think you just gotta that's something that's something, you know, that's you know But I think people's that governor inside of your head for what's okay sexually can certainly get altered Yep, yeah, yeah, and get we and get yeah, like when I think of those Duggar kids like the

Speaking of religious families like they have those Duggar children, you know, they're famous. They're like 10 kids Yeah, 20 children. How many children was it pull up Duggar? I was gonna try yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I was gonna try One of my buddies was like friends of them and I was like gonna try to like date one of them but that yeah that but they're like That seems like a good wholesome thing, but they get a got it got twisted up, right? There's lots of stuff But how I think could you not at this point you have children the age is so different 19 kids and counting so you have kids I mean, you can't even reach a light switch without touching another kid's breast

You know what I'm saying like you can't even there's just there's not 19 showers in that house I know that there's not 19 you everyone can't get a hot shower, right? It's just those are just the facts. There's gonna be a lot of like passing through in the restaurant Yeah, there's a lot of can I get skinly squeezed by right with a lot of it cannot shower with you There's gonna be a lot of that. Yeah, which is first of all really normal for kids, but then it can get weird when one of the kids Is now is now 16 and what the kids is five it can get a little bit weird So if you say like cuz then wasn't there a lot of like incest and stuff going on there I think there was just a lot of like the one guys had a lot of trouble with sex

Sex addiction Josh Duggar. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, but I just and I don't know where it comes from I haven't read enough into it But wouldn't you wouldn't you like if Sight unseen if something told you that story you'd be like Yeah, that checks out. It makes sense. You know what I'm saying? Like, yeah, make sense. It's all right. Yeah. Yeah, I could have yeah What so what when you went to rehab when you say rehab what kind what do you go in for I mean I let's see Cuz I'm in half of them. Yeah, I so they put me with for Five things because they were like they like diagnose you

So I just went in there cuz I was just like I Was drinking a ton and I was I was real sad. I was real sad on the road and I like I just wanted to get like Get out. I just wanted to We talked about this before the scary thing is like everybody We go dinner tonight. Everybody at the restaurant is hoping For a better tomorrow, right? Maybe if I get a job, maybe if I get a wife Maybe if I get a raise may have owned the lottery tomorrow is gonna be better. Maybe if I'm my president gets elected And I was hoping in all these things and then I got them all. Oh, I had money. I had attention from women. I had

All my shows were sold. This is it's unbelievable and that's the saddest Cuz you realize oh the hope is not here You were hoping in all the better everybody at the oh, yeah, the restaurant has a better Better faith cuz you're like one day I might get it and you can live your whole debt your whole life hoping right? And then if you get it and you're still sad That's very dis it's it's that's nowhere to go. Yeah, there's nowhere to go. I can relate to that man Yeah, here's something new. You know how the price of gold has been all over the place lately. It's high. It's low It's low. It's high. Oh, where is it? Oh, I want gold

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dot-com slash Thio to get your first month free K E E PS dot-com slash Theo the stuff is effective. Take care of your hair Here's a question right here that came in from somebody Hey, Theo. Hey, John. I am Jenna from Minneapolis and Seeing you both live can't go Okay, hide money. She said Anyway, I have a question for both of you actually

You have both been open and vulnerable about your addiction and sobriety and recovery and I would just be curious What your greatest gift from that has been and if that has affected your comedy or career in any way? Thank you may come put them on video Yeah, they don't have to they can do video or audio I believe we've just been using video more recently because times have changed and people like I like that. Yeah, but I like When you got a sweet ever to send a question in you got to put yourself together for a bit You're gonna be going I might be on the podcast. I'm a I'm a tight knot. I'm a tighten up

I like she looks you put a church window in the back. Yeah, it's a grip nothing I'm joking, but as you put all those self-help books in the back for me. There you go. Very good What's that up on the top? What's that say? It's very something something from Hobby Lobby. It looks very warm I'm sorry, but look at her books. Dude, they're lined up by the by color. Oh That's a little look at the bottom books. Can they in the can the audience see this bottom books bottom books? Yeah, yeah, yeah, she got them baby and who a dude she loves us turquoise titles She got a she got purple on the bottom turquoise white white white and then dark on the top I like that. That's the dark arts. That's the organization. I want to yeah, um, that's a good question

Well, I think you and I have a connection I mean you and I I mean I just invited the other day to an Alan on meeting. Yeah, so I'm still trying to figure out like No, we didn't we couldn't figure out what it was. Yeah, that meeting is Alan on his interest in But that's like, you know what all those meetings all the a anonymous whatever they are It's just like oh, do you go to like CrossFit or you're going to 24-hour fitness like you're in there, right? emotionally Right lifting doing some reps, right and you got a face And so how you're like, hey, you want to go to Alan? I mean, I go I don't I go it. Yeah, I know

Right again the mental gym, right? Yeah, I go there. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I'll find I'll find something to take from there Right. Yeah, mine was what's it for the earlier question? Mine was alcohol depression workaholism narcissism and sex So all five of those Wow, that's what they put they diagnosed me with they were like You need to you need to work on all of these I was like, wow. Yeah, and so when you go like because the only thing I've done is I went to an eight-day facility recently and then

I've just been an AA, you know, yeah, I would like to go to more kind of Longer term and just stuff because it was really good when I went What do you what are some things you really got out of it that you didn't know about yourself before? Well, alright, so if my situation was not similar to the Duggar situation, but grew up very like This is the way life is, right? And it's very like very there's a lot of shame how I grew up, right? So all these things you're like, you know you when I was Let's say like when's the first time you ever saw like a Playboy? Let me think it was September and it was

Oh, let me think, it was September and it was, I didn't know it was September. Oh, it was September, dude. Oh, it was. Oh, I felt when the leaves were changing. Oh, dude, I was changing, brother. I knew that, man. I definitely, I was shedding skins, brother.

But yeah, it was September and I believe it was in the early, it was in the 90s. Okay, what did you, did you, did you have any context of that prior? Did you, did you? No. And so you saw, I didn't know what could be.

This is, am I, is this bad? What'd you think? Oh, as soon as I eject out of my body, I thought something's wrong with me. Okay, where did that come from? I think, well it came because I didn't know anything. I didn't know what had told you about that. Right, I didn't have any information.

So then when I did that and it felt good, but then it also, it's on my person, then the sea, the semen's on my body, I felt dirty because you have to then clean yourself up. So I think there's, there was an element of feeling dirty. Mine was, me and my brother were riding bikes over this dirt track, this old construction site that we had built these jumps and stuff

down the street from my house on Lulaway. And we were, we were riding and we, I saw a playboy in the, in the, I remember this like it was yesterday, just like Jenny, just like Jenny looking at you. And I saw it, me and my brother saw it. And I, I hadn't, we rode, we were like a mile and a half from my house.

We rode home as fast as we could. And you already had, he picked it up. No, no, no, we never, we didn't touch it. We didn't touch it. Did he see it too? Yup, we both looked at, we saw it. And we had no context of this. We didn't know, and so we rode home as fast as we could.

Let's go. Cause we were like, we were scared of it. Or we didn't, we, we were kids. And we, I remember throwing our bikes down in the garage, we ran aside, we were, my mom was doing something. We were breathing heavy. And she goes, what, where you guys been? And we said, we hid.

We said, no, no, no, nothing. And that's why I go back to, why did we hide? Why? Yeah, why? We didn't do anything wrong. We, we, but then we, and then, you know what? I was, you know, you know the answer to this. I was laying in bed that night. What do you think I was thinking?

I'm like, about that. I gotta go find that. I gotta go sneak. Now I gotta sneak back out. Right. And tell somebody I'm doing, and go back. So now you're building up more secret. You're building up whatever, whatever sex is to you

at this point, it's very secretive. And that, and that, it was from that day until 35 years old, that it was very, right. Listen, if you just, like, we, like, we, like very, and it was a lot of, and that's a lot of Christian growing up Christian is a lot of like, a lot of youth pastors, but like, when's the last time you looked at porn and like,

a lot of, I had to report to my pastor every time I masturbated. Wow. Which is. Oh, that would take me a month. Yeah, I know. It would take me a month of straight talking to the man. Like, literally, we would have to have coffee delivered.

Hey, this is, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So you had to go into their confessional. But did that help? Did that help alleviate some of the, does it just feel like I'm reporting how bad I am? Or is there a part of the template of that process? Cause I'm not as familiar with that process. Part of the template of it is that you,

there is some relief granted to you. Well, like, you all learned pretty quick. They were like, all right, well, I'm just not gonna say. Cause if I'm, if I say, I'm notched down. So I'm just not gonna say, cause it's a private thing anyway. Right. So then you're hiding. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Then you're hiding. And then, so you, but, but you think things, so anyway, fast forward until I was in rehab for four months and I thought, you know, my life is over. Cause I could very Christian, very shame-based, very, to answer her question, I got out. Everybody did was like, dude, we love you, man. Good to see you, man.

I hope you're doing well. That's kind of, you're not gonna, I think I even see it yet. Can't wait to see you back on, whenever you come back to Memphis, we'll be there. And it was, I'm telling you right now, I couldn't grasp that. Cause my whole life I lived with, if anyone ever finds out

the truth about you, everyone's gonna hate you. And then everyone knew the truth about me. And they go, we love you, dude. Everybody, we all, we're all on the path, man. Let us know. It was more lovable in a weird way. It was on, on. That's kind of where our relationship started.

I was like, oh, this guy's fucked up too, man. Yeah, what's up, dude? Oh, this is my buddy. Well, you feel, I think you felt very safe with me. Cause, and people do, I was in the, I was in the, I was buying a car. I was buying a new car and this guy goes, hey man, you John Chris?

And he said, my girlfriend is a big fan. He just like, I just want to let you know, man, I, I struggle with porn too. I get it. I go, what? I don't need, I don't know. I know, I appreciate that you feel very like that we're all out here together.

Take the penthouse package out of this Kia. I don't think I need this, but you do feel very. You feel connected. Connected somehow. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You were like, oh man. And that's what I think a lot of people relate to your podcast cause I go, that's, I see myself in that.

Right. I'm with that. Well, and I think it makes me relate to you, man. Cause you just want to try your bet. You know, you want to try your best and you're in a world where it's really hard. And, and there's a lot of, and this is something we talked with Jordan Peterson about like the level of capabilities

that these companies and these organizations and these. Talk about religious or no. I'm talking about, no, I'm talking about like pornography. Sorry. Or like the advertising, the way that they have to grip you. It's so strong. Strong, yeah. It's so strong, man.

And it's, it's my relationship to alcohol. Like I've been sober for 19 months almost, but it had to be physically taken from me for about a month. And then I was like, well, I'm good. Right. So when you, when you, somebody says to you, hey, I'm going to stop sugar or I'm going to stop caffeine or I'm going to stop drinking

or I'm going to stop, it's, it's kind of disrespectful to the human body is so strong, dude. It's so strong. Yeah. I'm going to start whatever the chemicals is so strong that you can't. It's hard. You can like white knuckle it for a, for a couple of days,

maybe, but to say I'm a, I had my alcohol to be physically taken from me and now I can live without it. Yeah. Now you've been a separate from a long enough you can. But I, that was a rehab is first of all, it's not practical, it's expensive. It's, it's in a, yeah, it's everybody can't do that. So if people come to you or me and say, hey, how do you,

how do I get help? My hand was kind of forced in a little bit. Right. I got exposed and I had to make a choice then, but I don't know what you would tell me two years ago. You couldn't tell me anything. Hey, this consequences of that. I didn't care.

Right. Tell somebody that's in the dark now. Man, it's a great question. I don't, it is. Yeah. What do you tell them? I, I said to my friends, just be a friend to that person. This is what makes me emotional. Just be a friend to that person that when it all comes down,

you're the first person they call. That's it. That's it. There's no giving them a pamphlet about like the dangers of teenage pregnancies. Yeah. You know what I'm saying?

Yeah. They're not even teenagers. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. Yeah. Some guys are unbelievable. Yes.

But yeah. Trying to be there for somebody. Yeah. That's it. That's it. And they say, like if, if you say, hey, I'm a go to this, I'm going to go to a, I mean, I feel like you've helped me a lot of ways say in a meeting, in a, a new meeting is

uncomfortable. You don't know where it is. Yeah. Who's in there and you say, hey, I'm going to check out this meeting. You want to roll. Yeah. Does it help?

Now again, but I'm trying to walk the path to the light, though. Right. So if any meeting helps. If you got a buddy that's out of his mind, what do you, you can't really, right? Yeah. I mean, you almost have to go with them.

You almost want to bring. But you can't force them. No, you can't force them. No, no, no, no, no. Yeah. So you just say. I mean, I had a great talk about this with Chris Delia the other day, you know, because he had a lot of,

I mean, he really, you know, he's really struggled with sex addiction. He talks about it openly. And I don't feel like I'm talking about him outside of shop and, and there were some things he even did that were kind of like just like broken bro code type stuff, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And it's some of us just, he was saying, look man, I was so into my addiction. I didn't, I thought everybody was behaving this way. You know, I didn't know. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's interesting because it's like, you get the opportunity to have some sort of affection or admiration from women.

That you never seen before. That you never seen before. Yes. That you, I mean, I remember, if you remember the Jenny looking at you, I remember in this girl's basement after a basketball game at her, she was having a party with her older brother

and looked her in the eye and asked her to go to prom with me and she said, no. Dang. Oh, I would have stopped. But I have, I have, I have a couple of memories like that. Right. When you were in college or at the frat parties and stuff like that.

Where you just felt. Where you looked a woman in the eye and said, do you want to do? And they said, no. And that. That's hard. So then, then you become a little bit, you get a little bit of success.

And then they, the, the girls be like, hey, what's up? What are you doing? It's like. Right. It's all the pressures off of you. A lot of the onus is off of you. Like, but you didn't even know that.

Now they're coming to you. Right. What? This is my. And, but you, you, when you're like in it, you don't like all the, all you do in rehab, all these people were in there for all different things. Yeah.

All different type of addiction. Something that. Well, crazily, I had a friend that was in there with you. Yeah, really? That's just crazy. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. I forgot about that. He was there with me.

Yeah. He goes, he goes. How many people were in y'all's group? He goes, do you know Theo Bar? How many people were in y'all's group? I forgot about that. Oh, you were y'all's group. 15.

To the odds that there's 15 people meeting up in Arizona for sex addiction, you know, two of them were friends with me. That's how we reconnected. Cause I got out of rehab. I go, do you know, oh my. Yeah. And you go, yeah, that's my guy. I spoke with him today actually.

That blows my mind. Okay. So all they would do in there is try to get you to see it from the other side. Right. So like one of my main struggles and still is is narcissism, behaving, I'm not a narcissist. I have narcissistic capabilities or tendencies.

Right. Which is different. Right. So like a narcissist would never go to rehab. Right. A narcissist would be like, hey, maybe I need to get some help. A narcissist would never do that. Right.

He would never admit that he has a problem. Right. Anyway, so like let's say for example, we're all meeting up to go to dinner at 5.30 in the parking lot. We're all going to meet at 5.30 in the parking lot. I show up at 5.45. I'm like, it's, we're just,

he's like, well, think about it from the other guy's perspective. This guy was on the golf course, taking a nap, doing whatever he got up, changed, showered quickly to be out there at 5.30. And he's standing there 15 minutes, nobody's there. And then you stroll up. Just willy-nilly eating a taffy.

Yeah. Just out here listening and singing a song, just with Kenny Chesney, look at it from that. I go, oh, that makes sense. Right. Oh yeah. I could, I could see why I would be pissed if I was him. And that's the thing with Chris,

and I'm not speaking on an attorney, but me and everybody's, you think about it. From the other person's side. And you go, oh yeah, that person just came to your show and they were just a fan of yours. And you're, they're sitting with 5,000 people, not the bragg or however many people are at the show. Less than that.

And I'm saying in Chris's shows. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. This is yellow. And then, and then the guy from up there says, what's up? Right. And if you're a little bit insecure or a little bit, a little bit lacking in any type of way, and that you're gonna be like, yep, I'm, yes.

Yeah. And that's not, that's not good for that person. Right. Well, it's not, yeah, it's kind of a, it used to be you would just have those kind of feelings and everybody would go home and they would, people would have their imagination and their hopes.

And then when you finally met someone that filled enough of the criteria and warmed your heart, you would attach all those moments of like, oh, I admire, I want this, that I need connection. You would attach them all to that person and you would hope that that, that you guys together made something good. Right.

And then now it's like we get so many, the second we have an urge or someone else does, we have the ability to put the urge onto a blockchain almost through Instagram or social media. Or on dating site. Or on dating sites, yeah. I gotta. Oh dude, I used to go to casual encounters, right?

I've never even said this before. Was that a telephone, is that a call? Scary place. No, this was on Craigslist. Oh, wow. Here's the crazy thing is that I just, I just said it was a place, like it's a real place. I thought it was a,

I thought it was one of those casual, like a phone number you. The ad comes on late at night and you go, yeah, I know what that is. And see if, cause one of my problems in my twenties, I would have a date set up and then. You good bro?

Yeah. Just sending my throat. Bill nut. It's the Lord talking to you, bro. The Lord babies in my mucous membrane, dude. Go ahead. Or the devil's trying to stop you from telling the story. Oh, dude, I got post nasal devil.

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Support the podcast. Rawr! I remember, yeah, I get on casual encounters cause there was the opportunity to have affection for women without any consequences. Yeah. And this lady, I remember I met her at a cafeteria, which is a bad sign out the gate.

Like a school, like a college cafeteria or like a, just like a cafe. Terrier, it had all that. It had a terrier. It had buffet. It had a salad bar. It had buffet and bar, yeah. You would go back with a new plate.

Or you get a new plate if you wanted. New plate, all right. So it's upscale. All right, okay, yeah. But she and I met there. I didn't even know they sold tequila. She chose it, right? She's a few years older than me.

She said, meet me at the cafeteria? Yeah. I meet her there. We have two tequila shots in this, like it was getting close to kind of closing time. So I think they'd had kind of turned off some of the lights kind of by the kitchen, but it was still pretty well there. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Oh my. Then we went back to my apartment. She made sure every light was out in the entire apartment. She even took a little placard, like a piece of paper or something that could be a placard. Yeah. And she put it in front of like the PlayStation, where the little light was, even blocked that.

No light, completely no light. And then. But it didn't start like this. So she knew what you looked like prior. She knew what I looked like prior, right? I don't know if she had like scars or she'd been in some fires. I don't know.

And my hands, I can't tell really that good if somebody has fire skin. I think I just don't have good like feeling hands, you know? If you felt it, you would know, I think. I don't know. Maybe it's like a scar, isn't it? It's kind of like a scarish or tighter. Yeah, it would have to be pretty bad,

I think for me to feel like, if somebody had been in a small fire, I don't think I would know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, you know, I mean, I haven't, I don't know. I could have been, I could have made love to someone that had been in a small fire and have no idea. That's what I'm saying, honestly.

I feel that. I feel that. But you're not, you're not. Okay, we'll continue with the story. So anyway, we end up making love, dude. And, uh... Pitch black. Pitch black, yeah.

What was she wearing at the cafeteria? Full, long sleeves, long pants. She was wearing, she looked like a little bit of a rock and roll woman. Okay, yeah. Like she had listened to rock and roll. She'd been on the road a little bit. She'd definitely driven 200 miles to fuck some guy in a band.

Like she looked... But not the lead singer? Like a... She wanted the lead singer. Yeah. But who knows if she got him? I don't know. A thousand...

She was attractive. Okay, all right, there you go. But... But you knew this before? Was there a photo exchange? Prior to meeting up? Yeah, there was a photo exchange. Okay, but that was like email?

Yeah, through email. So that's what's crazy, bro, is to think that... What's crazy is to think that, that in my mind, whatever sexual stuff had, you know, whatever things had built up in my head, my sexual foundation, it put me in that place where that was kind of...

That was how I was... And you kind of didn't... It was a slow progression. And then you kind of found yourself there. Yeah, I think... But little, little like, sacrifices over, not sacrifice, but like, eh, I wouldn't normally do this,

but I do it and then you get there. Right. Yeah, and then you're there. Right, it's little things. It's like, you know what, I'll see what this is about. I heard about this. Let me just look it up a little bit. Let me look at casual encounters.

Next thing you know, it's a moment of exchanging. And then finally, you're like, okay, now I'm literally walking across, you know, Wilshire in Los Angeles to go and meet someone at a cafeteria. And you, but like, no one, no one does

acts wrong. Nobody on planet Earth. I say, you know the guy that, a true, this is a true story. I think so. It's not a conspiracy. A guy flew hijacked an airplane, flew it into the world trade center.

I can see it. That's a true story. I've seen it. Oh yeah. He believed, that's, he believed he was right. Oh yeah, 911.

He believed he was correct. Did he not? Right, right. Yeah, in his mind, that was the thing to do. In his mind, he thought, I don't know what his rationale was, the American needed to be taken out,

democracy, freedom, liberty. Capitalism. Islam needs to be number, whatever it was, he's, he, and if that guy could convince himself that that is right, anybody can convince himself of anything.

Right. Anybody. And so maybe if you were like, for that, you were like, and I can relate a lot, it was like, I'm in a lot of, I'm in a lot of pain. It doesn't, the consequences don't matter.

Or I'm gonna, you're acting correctly to you. Right. Because in that, you're like, you are. And everybody is. If you're gonna get on the internet and trash Taylor Swift, say she's a slut,

or she's the worst, like if you're going, you are acting correctly to you. Right. That she has a lot of money, or she dumped her boyfriend, or her music isn't good, or she chose to be a public figure.

You have to tell a story before you do that. Right, right. Because if it was wrong, you wouldn't do it. Even if you murdered someone, you shot them, and they'd now later, you'd probably realize,

oh goodness, that wasn't, but in the moment, you were correct. Right, for you. You thought that they deserve to die. Based on what they did, they cheated on your girlfriend, or they whatever,

you acted correctly in the moment. And that's everybody. And that's what's scary, and that's what rehab is like, think about the 2000 people that are in that World Trade Center that are at work, dude. Right, get the other side of the story.

Try, try, try. And then when you do that, if you go into Starbucks, 9.30 in the morning, you scream at the girl for not having your coffee order right. You have to get it out of your head that she is making minimum wage.

She woke up at 4.30. She's been dealing with these people for four hours. If you thought that your body, your mind will not allow you to scream at her, it won't. Right. Because, but when you're, and even if you don't relate to the other person, is if I'm in so much pain,

I have to ease this pain somehow. I'm gonna take it out on anybody. You're acting correctly in the moment. And that all rehab is trying to do is say, right. Think about the guy that has a family that is in the World Trade Center, think and you go. And if rehab, if the process of change is correct,

and maybe not instantly, but you go, oh, yeah. And that's the process of transformation that has the whole thing. Right. That's it. Getting a perspective. That's it. Getting a perspective.

But if you're in a lot of pain, I would do, at the time, I would do anything. To, that closing that hotel room door at night, when I was on tour, it was like a prison cell, dude. Really? On the stage and standing ovations, that was all fine. But you, that thing closes, it's you. You're just sitting there.

Yeah. You just sitting, and now you're nobody. You're a little hungry, you go down. Can I get a Snickers? They're like, well, what's your code? And you're like, you're helpless, dude. And you wanna ease, I don't know why I got into one of my. No, it's interesting.

Anyway, if you'd like to accept the Lord, please raise your hand. I'm sorry, my bad, dude. I got too deep, dude. Yeah, well, I started to think, what is my story that led me to, cause I wonder if I, I go to some SAA or SLA meetings, and that's some sex addiction and sex and love addiction.

Yeah, we've been to a couple of them. Yeah, yeah, we've been to some men, and it's not as big a program as other programs. But there's definitely a lot of it, like a lot of connection, like, I think when I was young, my needs were all met. But you weren't lack, or you were. I wasn't lacking for any, like I had like,

you know, we had food, we were very poor, but we had things, but my mother had to work a lot, but I think my mother never adored me as a child. And I know that sounds like a weird thing to say, and people were like, boo-hoo, right? Sure. And that's fine. I agree somewhat, like, you know,

I don't wanna dwell on it my entire life. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But where I notice it affects me, is when any opportunity for adoration presented itself, that's what I needed. But that was before comedy, dude. That was before comedy. This is from being very small.

Well, the same thing, you're like, dude, oh, you just got into this trouble? Couple, I go, no, no, I've been in this my whole life, dude. Yeah, my whole life. My whole life. I've needed extra. Needed, what are you, yeah. I've needed, I just,

when attention from women became available, I needed, I remember my girlfriends growing up, I was such good friends with their mothers and all my friends, I'm still good friends with their mothers. Like, I just wanted the mom. Yeah, there was just something like, and I also was kind of a, I was real sensitive kid.

So like, and it's not a knock against my mother, you know? She did everything that she could do. It's just I needed an adoration. You needed it. I needed to be seen by a woman in the eyes and like, but bored. You didn't need to be seen by a woman. You needed to be seen

and that was the easiest way to get it. Right. Like, there was a guy in rehab that he would, he was like, he was like one of the richest guys in his town. Right. And he was, I don't know what he was in for, but he was the richest guy in his town.

And we would, everybody's addiction kind of played out in its own way. So every weekend when we left, we had to say what we were doing every hour. Like, I'm gonna wake up at nine, I'm gonna go to breakfast. Because people, addicts get off track. Right.

And if you, you're gonna be at all these places and you can do whatever you want, but you just had to tell them what you were doing. I mean, you couldn't go to like a bar, like a strip club or, but you, and so this guy was the richest guy in his town, just relating to your story. Every Saturday, he would go to the car lot,

the new, the dealership. Oh yeah. And he would go in there and he would get- Ford, Lincoln, Mercury. Yeah. You know, the big ones. Yeah. Lincoln.

And he would get pre-approved and they said they all knew how much money he had. And he would walk around that place, like, Oh. Getting, getting like, just like you're getting it or I'm getting it from the crowd. He got it by people knowing that he was rich. Yeah.

And that's how you said I needed it from women. You didn't, we all have this like- Well, now I need it from everybody. You need it. For comedy, I need it from everyone. He needed, and that was his way of getting it. And he goes, well, dude, I'm not doing anything wrong. I go, well, why don't you tell him?

Why don't you tell him that you're going to the car dealership? And he never bought a car, but he just walked around there and they knew how much money and it felt like, does that make sense? Yeah. It's to another guy. He's like, yeah, I go, that's not my thing, but-

Totally makes sense. Yeah, I got, you need to go feel the thing that you, yeah, checks out, checks out. Yeah. And wanting attention from women. It's also, the tough thing about it is it's also something that's just in your nature. So it's not like it's a crit, like a foreign thing. It's like this substance in this,

and I'm not describing women as a substance, but it's this other, it's the other half of what it takes in the world to make life. It's this magnet. So it's also- Well, they say it's similar, sorry, I finished your thought. I can't. Well, they say it's similar to an eating disorder

where you have to eat, but you know, if you've been working all day and you stop by McDonald's and get a salad, you're like, is that in your addiction? No, but if you're sad, because your boyfriend broke up with you and you eat three double cheeseburgers, now you're eating, that's your addiction.

So sex, you can't be a monk and live in the woods. Right. You have to be amongst women. You have to, and so if a girl comes up to you after the show and says, hey, I love your, I love your, that felt really good. Like, is that, does that like do it for you? Well, I just noticed if I like, I'm just attracted to, I get attracted to women pretty easily, you know?

Yeah, yeah. So like, I want, you wanna really know what it is for me? Cause I'm not like chasing sex and trying to have sex every night, so my friends were like that. Yeah, I was never like that either. I wasn't like that either. I think for me, it was just more like, I want you to like me, period.

And then if you're a female and I'm attracted to you, then yeah, heck, I'd also like you to like me more, probably. And if you're more, yeah. Well, you're very, I don't wanna speak out of tune here, but knowing you personally, that you're very, like after something happens, you're very like, did they like me? Did how did that go?

Very, you kind of reviewed a lot. Like I always said, with the race, do you wanna say what you texted me after the race? Yeah, I went to the race and I didn't really say hey to your family. I remember they were there. But you, so you went into your head somehow and thought, and I texted you, hey, I'm sorry,

I didn't say hey to your family. Which is, but you did the same thing, remember when I said about the Ryman show I got, you were, Oh yeah. You go, but you don't, you can't be a comedian without that. Right. But like, I go, no dude, they loved you

and they know your friend, there's a lot of people there and you said hi to them and they're, but you were like, did they like me? Right, I guess in the end that's what I'm looking for. Yeah, do they still like me? Am I still okay with them? And maybe for whatever reason, you didn't get a clue that they did.

Right. They were just following up to make sure. Yeah. Whatever that, whatever that is right there. Yeah, that's what, that's what definitely leads to. That leads your whole, everything. That leads to it. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And so that can be also what people go to sex and love addiction for. It's like, it can be for affection. It's not just like somebody like sneaking around, like putting their whole through like a bathroom. Yeah, no, yeah, yeah, it's not it. Which happened at LSU when I was there and I wasn't involved in it.

Okay. And I do know who was involved in it. This dude, yeah, this dude, big Henry and this other, this little white dude, bro, with a, not a mustache, but like a, some kind of long sideburns that almost came to a mustache. Real stupid looking thing, but But you were, you heard about it?

I mean, I knew they were doing stuff, bro. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It'll be a real discreet. You know, you can't be going to class in the bathroom every day. So it's hot in here too, guys. The AC broke. Let's get another question that came in here.

Oh, look at this guy in bed triggering. Let's shirtless, bro. Jesus. Is there another person there or no? Oh my God. I'm gonna have to take my penis off and put it somewhere. Oh my God, the kid. McKayla, we're wondering, our church got VBS this week.

You got any good VBS stories? I know y'all both grew up going to that VBS vacation Bible school. Oh, I didn't hear that. Gang, gang, gang, baby. That's unbelievable. Cause I was wondering what percent of my fans are your fans and your fans are my fans.

What do you think a lot? I would say only probably 15% of your fans are my fans. And vice versa. Yeah. I think we have different fans. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But do you talk about VBS?

I haven't talked about it much, man. My dad- But you know what that stands for? Vacation Bible school. My dad would take us over there and we'd make a lot of arts and crafts. It was arts and crafts every dude. The Lord is in the glue, dog.

Oh man. But that was just the kid, the- There were chicks there though too. Oh, 100%, 100%. But they didn't, your family didn't know what to do with you during the summer. No. And they send you out.

Anything. Yarn camp, anything dude. Horse camp, explorer camp, Boy Scouts. Breathing, treasure hunter. Nothing, doesn't matter. Take these kids. Reform pedophile meetings.

Something. Yeah, anything. I wonder how like, you know, like if you're like, botany. So this guy looks like a- Decent man. Like a good Baptist guy. If he's probably from the South.

So then you get a step away. Yeah, I could see him being at least a Pentecostal or one of those new churches. You get a step, so Pentecostal, he's like a step in, you keep stepping away. Then you get Jehovah's Witnesses, then you get into, like you get to, then it's the snake hunt.

And you're in Iverson Jersey after that. There's snake hunt, then you go, so I wonder how far away from traditional Christianity were your parents that desperate to send you to camp that they would have said, hey. Yeah. Yeah. Snake handle in church.

You had to take the kids, dude. It might not have been Christian as much as it was like, take these kids. I know I'm dead serious, dude. Yeah, dude. Oh, you know, exactly. Like, hey, what are you teaching them? Yeah.

Yeah, who knows, man. It's free? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're taking these kids for free. I don't care what you're teaching them for, I mean. Cause some of those songs, Southern churches. It gets dicey, dude. It gets quick, very quickly.

It gets real interesting, man. And you're like, hey, get on. Yeah, VBS growing up was, I used to work at them in college. Did you? Yeah. In college? I went to one in New Orleans. I worked in the inner city of New Orleans

teaching a VBS. Really? And in New York City, I did one. And it, I mean, dude, it was, there was no rules out there. Cause it's tricky because somebody else is, when you work at a church and you're like a missionary, somebody else's, when, when your boss is paying you, but it's not there.

It's weird. The human being was not set up for that. Oh yeah. You're like, yo, I'm gonna work in, in Nicaragua, but my boss is in Louisiana. You wanna set the alarm? No, I don't. No, I'm not setting the alarm tomorrow.

Dude, that's funny. My dad's family was in Nicaragua doing missionary work when, when he was paying. Where was the money coming from? I don't know. And there probably wasn't much money back then. I think it was 1910. Now here's a weird thing I did in relationships.

I painted a chair at Vacation Bible School Camp and gave it to a girl like 17 years later as an adult. And that, look, if you want to end the relationship and end up on at least a list in a woman's head. Some kind of list. Give her a chair you painted as a child. 16 years earlier as an adult dry and also drive at five hours to her, dude.

But again, in your mind, you were acting right. This guy Randy, when I was in Vacation Bible School, he said he was, he was from the other church. He would come over, he was like a, he was a, he had a red sports car and he was, you know, when you at that age, you, you, the guys in his 30s, late 30s, 40s, any single, he's cool. But now you're like, why didn't this guy?

Now he's us. Where was his family? Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah, looking back on it. When you're a youth pastor is 25 and hanging with us on Friday nights. Where? Right.

Where are you? Who's your squad? Right. Is it us? And so this guy Randy would come. He was a bigger guy. He would always. Big Randy, bro.

He would wear shirts. Oh yeah. In the pool to swim. Oh, he would? He would wear shirts. Like, not like, like darker, like darker. Like a black guy. No, white guy, but black shirt.

Oh, wow. You could see through the, if you know what I'm saying. Okay. So he would do like a, he went off the high dive. And that was a, this is a real story, dude. Fake plan, but it'll, I'm sure it'll take. Well, yeah. Dang boy.

So when he. And he loved doing that kind of trick. Oh yeah. But he would always, he wouldn't come out every day. But when, when Randy started walking up, all the kids knew he about to, it's about to, and he would do a huge. Come on, Randy.

Everybody went, and he was like kind of a rogue. He wasn't attached to a church. Like these are from first Baptist. These are from first prayers. Randy just. We was at six Baptist out there. He, anyway, so he said, he said he promised if every kid memorized Psalm 23,

he would shave his head at the end of, cause he had like a long, he had like a long, he was up and he goes, I will shave my head. He's an organ donor. Yeah, a hundred percent. This kid, I think his name was Nathan and James. Oh yeah. Two of my buddies.

If they could quote Psalm 23, he would shave his head. Let's go. And this kid got up there nailed it. And he got in front of church and it was an outdoor, it was like an a pavilion type situation. Oh yeah, a lot of pavilions. Yeah, a lot of pavilions that they were covered, but not at the sides.

Yeah. I remember the, that's a funny, like this is the, this must have been before this lady was working, me and my brother, my older brother. I asked, cause I was going to put this in my act, but I never talked about it on stage. I texted my brother like a year ago and asked him, this is true.

We were getting, we went forward for prayer. Are you familiar with that? Oh yeah. You go to the front of the church? If they, if you're- The children? Yeah. If you're convicted about being a sinner,

which we were the, we were good kids. Right. You know, so they were like, you're, are you positive that you, whatever. We went forward. Me and my brother were getting prayed for, but this woman, this woman was attractive. This was attractive woman.

Oh yeah. Touch me. Yeah. She was praying for us. I mean, pray. Yeah. Touch me on the shoulder and pray with me. And I remember, I'll never forget this.

And this is before I knew what the word meant. So she goes, just bless these boys. Be with, like the gent, they starts general. The prayer starts general. Yeah. Walk with them, teach them your ways, may they do your will, keep them out of trouble, these type of things.

And then as you go on, you kind of get more confident you're hearing from the Lord. Right. And you kind of, you start kind of guessing. And she said, I will never forget this. She said, I've just pray that you, I just asked that Lord that you would break the spirit of masturbation in their lives.

And we didn't know what it was. No. We did not know what it was. Well, he didn't know, dude. I had to have been 12 maybe. Wow. 11 or 12. I was homeschooled.

I didn't know. It sounds like a place almost if you don't know anything about it. And it's a spirit? Oh, the spirit of masturbation. Like it's like, it sounds like a ghost. Like it's, we asked our mom on the way home.

No. We asked her. I go, what, what it, what it, she goes, where'd you, you know, the youth camp. She's thinking. Right. One of the kids. Yeah.

You're out of that. You were on the, during archery or the canoes and the kid that came up. No, it was during prayer. But think about it, think about it from her perspective. If you're, these two, my brother was older than me. So if I was 12, he was 14. That's probably

odds wise. Yeah. I mean, you. Right, right. Yeah. She just guessed wrong. Yeah. She just guessed wrong.

Dude. Dude, I remember biking over to my friend's house like five miles cause they had porno over there. And I'd go over there and look, look at it. You're, dude, I go and use his bathroom for like two hours, dude, on a Sunday. Just in there to some absorbent porno, dude.

Just like, I remember even just like, I would lay down and just put the magazine on my, on my skin and just absorb the porno. That's what you, at the time. But that's what I needed, man. And then somebody had chiseled a set of tits and like a tree outside back of our apartment building. And people would be out.

Like on the bark. Yerking off to it. It's where they got, man. And it was good looking, man. I mean, it was for outdoors. It was an artist. He could have sold that if it wasn't on the tree. I mean, yeah, it got,

it got like these Larva's in it or whatever, but I messed up. Yeah. The messed up the thighs that got the larva that, yeah. She has to be hotter when she was in a varicose. When she was in a prime. Yeah. It was varicose breasts after a while,

after a couple of years, but the first year and a half, first 18, 19 months, that stuff was out there. You'd see people out there, man. Well, you did. It was Armount Rushmore, dude. What city? Huh?

What city? Covington, Louisiana, man. Covington, Louisiana. There you go. I bet that's still there. And we used to do Peep and Tom and two, and that was big when I was young. Again, you, that was just like,

you got to differentiate curiosity versus. Right. Cause I had the same. Or like, you just like look to see, but that you weren't. Dude, I remember my buddy and I, one of my closest friends would sit there and sat there naked one time under a blanket. Okay, not same.

Yeah. Yeah. He might be on your- You don't know this one, but yeah. And we're just like touching each other's shoulders and stuff. And it was hella gay, bro. We didn't know at the time. You didn't know.

Yeah. We wasn't being gay. We was being children. That's the difference. Yeah. Cause they always say when there's, when there's a difference of an imbalance of power. Yeah. That's when it gets, like someone that's your boss,

someone that's a parent, someone that's age, some kind of someone that like. Yeah. This was even Stephen. Yeah. So then it, yeah, yeah, yeah. Which is, which is also tricky because once you come into power, or you come into influencer, you come into something. Right. Then it's already automatically granted that without even realizing it.

That's interesting. Maybe they should, it just should come with like, Hey, you got, it also comes with this. So just be like, you don't know when the transition happens. You're like, Oh, now, I remember Jay Moore talking about a- Right. You're like, now do women like me? Just like, is it, it has nothing to do with me? Now, now it's different.

There should be some sort of a little, they should send you a mail or something that says, Hey, Bubba. Now you're different. Now, like you just need to take this into context. Like if a Chili's, if the Chili's server hooks up with the other Chili's server, there's no problem. That's the, that's a Saturday. That's two for one.

That's, yeah, that's plus dessert. Yeah. But when the manager or the boss hooks up with the waitress. Which happens all the time. Or maybe that's not a good example. But like, yeah, then you, that's an imbalance. I can't do that. Cause you, cause she's, if you say, Hey, do you want to come over?

She's your, you're her boss. Right. Well, the weird thing though is in your head. So for some people, the power never really changes. You're just excited to finally have a way to, to meet women or you like women and you're excited about getting to see them or be naked around them. And now it's like, fuck, now you can't do that. Yeah. It's like, again, when you're the waitress and the waitress, that's fine. But that now, now I, the sudden I see he's, he's right now.

Now what about these text messages that we send each other? Yeah, we're like, well, that's scary to anybody. Dude, if a girl came out like, dude, I, there, there's escorts out there that I've texted some real, you know, probably some poignant information to, you know, and not no nudie pics. I don't send nudies. Yeah. Yeah. But, but stuff.

Yeah. But things like if I would be ashamed, you know, I might be a little proud of myself, but all depends because the spelling depends on the screenshot. Yeah. But there's definitely like some convo's. They'll be like, man, that was not just embarrassment. Yeah. Yeah. That's how we feel like.

Not, not, not that. But and the world doesn't care. The world is more about like, well, let's see the embarrassment more than about what is the content, what's going on with this person, you know? Yeah. Yeah. They remember that, that when at the race, the race, so I've, I've made jokes about like the mayor, Mayor Cooper. Yeah.

I've said, like, my, my comedy shows, the mayor's corrupt or the mayor, like, cause he's raising taxes or whatever it is. I made jokes about him. I go, dude, we have some great comedians in this country. Are we, I do. National's got some amazing comedians, Nate Bargatze, Theo Vaughn, Mayor Cooper, like, like, but then at the race, he came out and did like the. Oh, yeah, that opening thing.

And they booed him. I heard that. So, and I immediately like rehab, if it does anything, it'll move you towards empathy. Yeah. And I go, oh, I don't, I don't like this. This is a man. I saw him. I didn't make eye contact.

But I go, this is a guy that now he might be, he might be corrupt or he might, but he, he's trying to serve. I don't know. But we can't, we, this is not the way. Right. And, and I felt, I felt empathy. I go, I don't, I wanted to DM him and I'm like, hey, dude, it makes me cry to think about like, I was, I don't.

Right. I was there. Sorry how that probably felt. I could understand how that felt. And I go, I've made fun of you on my show. I just wanted to let you know that I've been through my own stuff and I, and we didn't deserve that. Right.

That crowd is probably a lot of conservatives in the crowd. I would give maybe that wasn't, he shouldn't have taken that gig, right? He was probably doing to try and grab some face with conservatives. Yeah, yeah. And he came back in with the city, but he canceled those. Politicians are strategic. And he canceled races at that track for all during COVID. Oh, well.

And so maybe, yeah, yeah, yeah. So then they knew that. Yeah, they all knew it. Yeah, it was not the move, but I remember, I went to the Hawks game, the Hawks Sixers game about a month ago in Atlanta and Ben Simmons, place for the Sixers. Yeah. Kid is a phenom.

I remember he played at LSU duty bomb. An all star, right? This kid was a million, a million dollar contract and, and, and in the playoffs kind of fell apart. Yeah, he set up Duncan past it. And he was very timid. He's very, and I remember being there crushing him, dude. And then somebody was like, I ran on ESPN or something like 22 years old.

And I go, I feel some kind of way about this now. Now this kid's in his hotel room with a phone. Right. But see, that's where we, that's where it gets weird is when we do we, it's tough. That's the tough thing about being a comedian. Because you're like, it's tough to be empathetic, but also want to be able to just rip on stuff and be funny and be a sports fan and be up and be. Bill Burr said that you remember Burke Christchurch asked him if he ever wanted to

meet the president. He said, no, he was, I never want to meet him because if I meet him, then I can't crush him because I empathize. I know Donald Trump. He's a buddy of mine. I can't. Right. And that's, but that's not the right way to live.

You know what I'm saying? Yeah, it's tricky, dude. It's tricky. That's, look, I think that's one of the battles of everything. But also it's like, we've also created an environment now where there's constant information about everything. So there's so much stuff to be empathetic for that you almost get exhausted. That you can't be like the refugees.

You're like, I don't. Yeah. I mean, I felt even on this past weekend on some of the solo episodes, we'll talk a lot about like, you know, try and listen to things that are going on with people and I love it, you know, and I love like, cause a lot of people all call privately and just chat and stuff. And, and, you know, it's important to me and you can tell sometimes that it's, that it's feels good to them to connect with somebody, but you can't take on everybody.

Sometimes having to, yeah, it's like, it's like, yeah, you feel like how I can't do, you can't do everything. Nobody can. And sometimes we, we want to, and sometimes like, like, I notice I'll text people and ask how they're doing sometimes that to me. And the truth is I do that. I feel like, cause I mean, one, I care. I want to know what them to know.

Somebody cares, but also I wish people did that to me. Yes. Yes. Yeah. We all do those things, you know, so I remember I was in my deepest shame when I was in the real, real darkness. When we had a green room that overlooked the parking lot of the show and it was like, is it by Hampton Inn?

It was, uh, that depends on the night. Was it in Baton Rouge? No, it was in the South though. Maybe Jackson or some city like that. And I remember our green room had a window looked out over the, and it was, it was an hour before the show and that line was hundreds of yards. And these people were so excited. Oh, this is, they're super bold.

Dude, this is, and I, I was like, I was, I was like, and I was in a dark, dark place in my, and I couldn't watch it. I go, you got to take me out of here. I can't, I never experienced that before, but I'm a comedian. All I want to do is that to go like, this is my guy, dude, this guy makes me laugh. We drove four hours. Yeah. We got the tickets.

Here's the tickets. There, the truck, this, it's going to, and I, I couldn't, my shame wouldn't allow me to. Why? Like, what is it you think? Like you're a shant, like what? Well, I don't, I think it was like these, these, if, if I felt worthless. So when people drove four hours and say, we love you, that was hard for me to, because I saw, it used to be just a big crowd.

Now I saw a guy and his wife and their friend. And I go, it made it, I go, I can't look at this dude. This is, or like, dude, the lines wrapped around the, I go, I can't look at that. It's hard for me to mean, it's hard for me to feel like, it's hard for me to see that I mean something to someone. When you don't, when you're working on meaning something to yourself. Or when I felt like, I think I felt for a long time that I didn't mean anything to anyone. Yes.

And for me, that's a lot of it. And when someone says, someone watches this podcast, connects with you and says, Hey, the closest Theo is coming to me is eight hours. I'm going to drive to see him. Does that, would that, would that DM make you nervous? Oh, it just makes me feel like, it almost makes me feel sad a little bit, not for them, but it just makes me feel not sad, it makes me feel, it makes me feel like I'm never going to be able to do something to repay them.

That they've, they've saved your life kind of in a way. Yeah. Or just like, man, they're, they're doing this, like, man, I'm not worth that. You want to say, Hey, well, next tour, or don't, don't do it, don't go out of your way for me. But they, but they've, Right. But to them, it's a different, right?

It's their world. And if you let them have their joints, stuff like that. And that thing inside of me, don't go out of your way for me. It's like, all you ever wanted was for someone to go out of the way for me, God, it makes me emotional. Dude. Like, and look, man, I'm not saying any of this stuff. Like I'm not like, you know, I'm not in some Debbie Downer thing or anything like that.

Like, but everybody, if the comedian or not, everybody could relate to that. But it's like, yeah, I think I'll always just, somebody said, Hey, Theo, okay. Of all of these comics, of all the shows, we're choosing you. Right. And even it's, if it's a monetary exchange, you're giving them a thing, it's, but, right. It's like, man, it's just, it feels like, you want to, you want to tell them that you're not worth that, but they have decided you are like, if I went to, right. And then it makes me almost jealous that I wish I could decide that I'm worth that.

Yeah. You're like, which is, when I got out of rehab, everybody said, dude, we love you. I go, what? If you went to prison tomorrow, I remember when I was in rehab, we are, there's a month or there's three weeks where there's a blackout period. You can't talk to anybody. Right. No, but, and I got after three weeks and I thought my life, I thought my life, that was

when I was as close to wanting to end my life because I just, but after three weeks, there's a whiteboard. And when you have a letter or a note, they write your name and your last initial. So there's three weeks, I heard nothing and all of a sudden I walk in, John C. And I, and that granted, think about, I was in Wickenburg, Arizona with, with a bunch of dudes and your buddy. And I didn't know, knew, knew nothing of just trying to, they tell you when to go to the bathroom, when to eat, when to sleep, and it said, John C. And I went up there and they

hit me. It was a little like, you know, when back in the day, when like you called the office and the boss is gone, but they write a little Samantha called from, from accounting, right? Give you the little away, whatever that was, and they handed this message and I looked at it. I was writing the atrium there. I said, this is like, one of those like moments you remember forever and I said, you said, your parents are coming to see you.

Your parents are coming. You didn't know they were coming? No, I didn't know they were coming, but, but I, I thought I ruined it. I thought, I go, why would my, I, I embarrassed the family name. I, my dad's a pastor. My mom works at the school, the Christian school. My dad's in politics, John Christ is on Fox News, CNN, USA Today. What do you mean?

And they cared. It was like for a week. They came for a week. It's like, and that's all I ever wanted my whole life is my parents to say that like they care. And I was like, and I wanted to tell them, tell them I'm not to come. Tell them I'm, I'll be done in whatever, you know what I'm saying? And all, it was like, I was so shocked by that, that they wanted to do that.

I think. But what year? This is your parents. Right. Why would they, what? Why would they not? Where did you get that idea? Like, where did you get that idea that people wouldn't?

It just happened. I don't know. Yeah. I don't know where that, that thing comes from. Where did you, where did you ever get that idea that your parents, when you were in the most amount of need, this is their child that is struggling. Where, why would you think that they wouldn't come to see you? I don't.

I don't know. That's what, that's what the whole process was. But that's how it landed on us. Yes. And every day, dude, every day, I don't want to make a bigger deal about this as it is, but like, you know, easier in rehab, a guy would get a piece of mail once every three weeks, maybe someone to get a piece of mail, except for my wife or from a child or something. Every day stacks of mail for, and I didn't know these people.

Really? Either through my management company or through my family or a friend of a friend. People were like, just stacks of mail, dude. And all these people didn't really know me that well. I mean, my family did, but it was people like, Hey, my daughter is the GM of the club that you worked at in Denver. And she likes, and I have the same story and I need to tell you that it's okay. I have to, I'm compelled to get this message to you.

They were so moved, but it was all people that have been to the dark and looked the devil in the eye. It was all of those people. And for me to refuse, I don't, to not let them love you is. It's almost the same. Right. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. When somebody says, Hey, Theo, comedian or not, you're my guy, dude. He needs, he's like, that can't be. And now we're always thinking someone wants to take something from us. Someone wants to. Yeah. I think comedian or not that thing, whatever that is, that's really.

And you go, it can't. It hits me. It's like, what do you mean? Like if I'm not something extremely special, you can't just, you'll never see me. That's what always felt like. Never. Like unless I stand out like as much as possible. And go over.

Right. And I'll never be seen. And what happens if you're never seen? That's a death sentence. Yeah. For a guy like me, death sentence. Oh, I think it's a death sentence for any human. Yeah.

And what's scary is when everything happened to me, like people were saying the most horrific things about me on the internet. And by everything happened, it was, it was stuff. Like things came up and you had some lewd information with people. Yeah. Yeah. That I was like sexting girls. Sexting girls.

It wasn't anything. No, it wasn't. Yeah. And even non-traumatic. And nothing non-consensual. Right. Nothing. It was just a guy being, and.

But also when you were attached with Christianity. Yeah. I was working in church. When you were working in churches and stuff like that, everything has a different taboo to it. Which is fair. Right. And I say, I've said.

That's a good point. I've said. It's interesting. If you work at a company and they said, you can only wear jeans on Friday and you wear jeans on Thursday and you get fired, that's, you knew the rules. Right. Of the company. That might be a BS rule.

But you knew, I knew when I work in churches that you can't get hammered and bring girls to your hotel room. Right. And I did that. Right. And so that, and you get fired. Fair. Not no moral.

Is this a good guy or a bad guy? Those are the rules. Spoken or unspoken. I took the job. Right. Fair. Yeah. That's a good point.

If it had just been comedy clubs and stuff, it would be different. But when you have churches and stuff, it's different. Sure. But the worst, the worst, you know, I'd read all these comments of people saying these most horrific things. Oh, that's the hardest. Yeah. It's horrible.

But you know, my buddies joke about this. My buddy's in a group text. He goes, you know what? You know what? Comment hurt the worst. This is, it's kind of funny, but it's kind of like, some guy goes, who's John Christ? Oh, man. Which you get that.

Totally. You're like, it's all, but people are talking about me. If Donald Trump is on the front of the New York Times, he wins. He wins. No matter what it's saying, Nobel Peace Prize or got caught with a hooker. If he's on the front, people are talking about him as a narcissist. You win. And somebody goes, who is this?

It was, it crushed me, dude. You're like, that's tough, dude. That's tough. Yeah. I think when I was growing up, there was such little, I had assisted out with real sick. She had a liver disease when she was born. So she needed a liver transplant. And, uh, and so she got any affection my mother had.

She got, and she got to be around nurses, like people that are real caring. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. All a lot of attention. A lot of attention. Yeah. Yeah.

And the rest of us just didn't get it. We just didn't get it. So what I want to say about that kind of stuff is like, I could have gotten it, but I didn't feel like I got it. So that's another thing. If you ever want to talk to your parents about stuff, like one way to do it is you can say, I didn't feel, this is how it felt to me. So that way it's like, you're not attacking them.

And they're not the enemy. They're not the enemy. You're like, my pastor who would ask me if I masturbated. Like, I would like to talk to him now. We're like, Hey, this seemed like a little shame based, but also that guy was trying to help. Yeah. He was trying to help.

Now it wasn't, it wasn't, but your parent is like, my dad was like, oh, he was gone a lot at conferences. You're like, yeah, but I had eight kids. I needed to get the money to, it kind of wasn't, you didn't get the love the way you wanted it. Right. You wanted your dad to play catch with you. Right.

You wanted a certain type of serving. Right. And they didn't have that. That's it. You wanted to some thousand island. All we got is ranch at this house. And the crazy thing, they didn't have it also because nobody ever gave it to them. That's where you also are.

Like a lot of us are suffering the genetic, the third generation of something that happened generations ago. My, my, my buddy Isaac, when I went, I was home school, first eighth grade, then I went to private school and I was always hanging with him. And he would, uh, every time his parents, they would leave him out here, going to the movies, leave the car off the phone, off to, they would go, we love you. Isaac, I love you. And I never, no one ever said that to me in my house.

No one ever said, John, I love you. No, it just wasn't, did my parents love me? My parents, my mom said she, when I was in rehab, she, I said, she said she would give her life for me. Wow. She said that to me. And I believe that. Right.

But does that make sense? I never, I go, how come, and you get a little bit of a scar maybe cause you're like, well, why don't you tell me that? Yeah, but their parents never, that, you know what I'm saying? They don't know. Yeah. They don't know. But so here's the thing then, if you have children, you could tell, you know, get specific

with them sometimes about how you feel if you think that they may not know. And because I think in my house, I think my mom always just assumed we knew also that of course we love you Theo. Right. And so of course we're a family unit. We never knew any of those things. We felt like we were. You were on your scavenging out on your, by yourself.

Yeah. And, and. And so then, yeah, yeah, but you gotta get, if you didn't get that. And I felt like I needed to get everybody in the world to love me so I could get my mom to love me. By default. Look at all these people that are at my shows, Shirley. And then what's odd, what's very odd is like our relationship is like, you burn your life

to the ground and that's when your parents show up. But they, to be fair, they came to every comedy show they could within six hours. They will come to it. They, they, you know what I'm saying? But that's what meant the most is when they came. John C. Oh man, dude. That should be my new name, dude.

Yeah. John C. It's interesting. Once you're in kind of some of the recovery world, it's interesting to have somebody else to talk to about this kind of stuff. You know, so. Yeah. I appreciate you, man.

I appreciate you being willing to, just even when you and I are out of here. Whenever, wherever we are, you know, I feel like we're always willing to kind of talk about some of this kind of stuff. And we've been, we've been in, in, to be fair, we've been in the light and the darkness together. We've been in meetings together. Oh yeah. And then we also been.

Oh yeah. Trying to holler at girls. I was trying to buy drugs that one night at that freaking bar, remember? Jesus Christ. Thank God. Thank God they didn't have it. Yeah. Thank God they didn't have it.

But we, but, but you, you're like, I don't know. The lady got her glasses stuck in her nose ring that he was out of her mind. But you don't have any kind of like, uh, yeah, when it's, when it's past the point of like, I'm not here to get anything from you and you're not here to get anything from me. Cause we both, whatever I have, you have and whatever you have, I already have. So if you said, Hey, and we, and I, and I'd say pray in the past year that we, we both kind of come and gone from the darkness to the light. You know, there, there, there are periods where I'm still, I struggle.

Oh yeah. Yeah. And you go, yeah. But all you're doing, but you're not doing anything. No, no, no, no. You're just challenging your own kind of newer set of boundaries. And you just like, Ed, you want to go to a meeting? Yeah.

I know. And then I start, you know, I start isolating or yeah, you just want to, you just want to kind of not be in the light. But every time we go to a meeting, it's like, that's the, that's whatever that is, that's that's Christ, man. That's Christ. Yeah. You make a joke out of it, but it's not.

But it is seeing people connect, seeing people touch that guy at that meeting, that last one was crying. Yeah. He was sitting right next to us grown. So happy because his wife, it was better. One man had gotten a divorce ball and dude, and he went, how many people were at that meeting? 50?

There's a lot of people there. And he started talking about, I don't know what he was talking about. And he just started, he fell apart, man. Yeah. And you got to wonder how many people are walking out at this, in this everywhere tonight, just close, close to coming undone, dude, you know? Well, especially today where we want to get anything that feels human, it resonates with you in a cord that's on, that that's a connection that that's of a higher power.

And that's a, when that adult man broke down and started crying because his wife that had left him was, was she doing, her health was doing better or something? Yeah. I don't want to compromise. I don't want to compromise anybody. I think he's a couple of your sober. Yeah. And he goes, I'm so proud of, and I'm just so great that she's healthy.

Yeah. That's too much. I mean, it's not too much, but it's the, yeah, yeah, yeah. And what, but you can serve him by just by being there and listening. It hits that heart, heart, dog. And say, get all the way in, that goes all the way in, bro. It plays that heart, heart. John, Chris, if you guys haven't seen a lot of John's videos, they're so, dude, I am so

envious, dude. You, Kyle Dunning, and there's a couple guys that I'm just so envious. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I love Kyle. I love his stuff and go check it out. You have a new tour that's going on too this fall. Yeah.

Fall tour. Every, every theater you're coming to, I'm probably going to the week before, the week after. Cool, man. And some even bigger ones. I think, I know you're going to be on in Baton Rouge too. So I think I might try to go down and do that and go down with my family for that. Remember that one time you came on my show?

Uh-uh. Yeah. He did. It was my show. Oh, it was Zayn. He's here. Yeah. And I think that's too edgy.

Yeah. I didn't, either I go, did you tell him that it was like a church crowd? And I go, nah, he's a comedian, dude. I mean, he said the joke about the guy about by the fans. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Oh, shouldn't have told that one. But. But I say the same thing, dude. Go see Theo's show, man. You'll love it, dude. Thanks, brother. I appreciate it, man. Love you, bro.

Thanks for coming on. Yeah. We'll have to hit a meeting soon. Same to you, brother. Okay. Thanks for coming to the live broadcast. Yeah. Thanks for coming.

Thanks, man. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.

Bye. A little time for me to set that parking brake and let myself on one Shine that light on me I'll sit and tell you my story Shine on me And I will find a song, I will sing it just for you