Threedom - Threevisiting: Boink Boink Whee

Episode Date: January 14, 2025

Threevisiting on the Tues: Scott, Paul & Lauren discuss Valentine's Day, banned books and porn before playing Thank You For Attending My Ted Talk. Send Threetures and emails to [e-mail] us a voicemail asking us a question at hagclaims8.comFollow us on Instagram @ThreedomUSA.Listen ad-free and unlock bi-weekly THREEMIUMS on cbbworld.comGrab some new Threedom merch at cbbworld.com/merchSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hi, I'm Reshma Sajjani, founder of Girls Who Code. Look, I'd consider myself a pretty successful adult woman. I've written books, founded two successful nonprofits, and I'm raising two incredible kids. But here's the thing. I still wake up wondering, is this it? And if the best years are yet to come, when's that going to start? Join me on my so-called midlife, my new podcast with Lemonada Media, where we're building

a playbook for navigating midlife, one episode at a time. Each week, I'll chat with extraordinary guests who've transformed their midlife crisis into opportunities for growth and newfound purpose. At some point, we all ask ourselves, is there more to life? I'm here to discover how to thrive in my second act, right alongside you. My so-called midlife is out now,

wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Coolop Eulisak. And I'm Soojin Park. And we're your aunties on Add to Cart, a podcast all about the things we buy, the things we buy into, and what that says about who we are. We're real life friends who love to talk about what we're adding to cart. Sometimes that means trying the latest snail serum to slather on our faces, or a sweater that screams one third ugly.

That's right, Soo. Each week we dive into honest, oftentimes TMI conversations about what's taking up space in our shopping carts and in our minds, be it products, trends, or something for our auntie book club. We also bring guests on the show and take a peek into their carts because the things a person buys or doesn't says a lot about them.

We like to think of ourselves as aunties to all, fun, slightly unhinged, and always ready to share some sage advice and a good product wreck. Add to Cart is out now, wherever you get your podcasts. Freedom! Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da- I did it by memory. We should always do it acapella. I did it by Menon. By memory. By Menon. What does Menon sell? All I know is that the theme song. Deodorant.

Deodorant. Oh, okay. I just know by Menon. Are they still around? I hope so. God, I hope so. Menon, we want to hear from you. Menon, we want you to sponsor us.

You know what I love? The Crocs have abandoned us. Oh my God, yeah, Crocs really bailed, dude. Where'd they go? You're telling me you didn't see a 1000% spike in your sales after we did your ad? I think everyone was just happy that it happened and no one was, no one did anything,

but they were like, yay, Crocs did it. I feel a sense of completion, but I'm not buying those shoes. Yeah I mean I still wear. Yeah. Scott honey Scott honey you're a little bit quiet. You are a little quiet. Oh dear. Turn that mic up buddy.

Remember when I asked you can hear me okay? Yeah we could hear you but it wasn't as loud as once we all start talking over each other. Okay is this slightly better? You have to pass the freedom test. Yeah, let's hear it. Okay, how's this? It's better. That's better.

It's better. I mean, I could turn all the way up, but then it was peaking on my Zoom recorder. The sneaky peak. We don't want that. Do you want, but I want you to be able to hear me. We can hear you much better now. Okay, all right, great.

Anyway, Laura. Do you want to say something? No. We can hear you much better now. Okay. All right. Great. Anyway, Laura. Do you want to say something? No. Yeah. Do you have anything to say? Well, I'll just say really quickly that I did get Mike of Valentine's present. Did you really? And one of the things I got him was a new pair of Crocs.

Whoa. I got a new pair of Crocs. Does he have an existing pair of Crocs? He does. He loves them. Oh, OK. And he goes of Crocs! Does he have an existing pair of Crocs? He does, he loves them. Oh, okay. And he goes to the pool a lot to swim. And he wears his Crocs. Oh, not just to look at girls in bathing suits?

I'm sure that's a side effect. But he has Crocs that he wears. Has he ever come back home wet? Yeah, actually every time. But only in the dick hole area. Oh my God. Hey! Dick hole area. Oh my god. Hey. Dick hole area.

That general radius of the dick hole. Right in here around the area of my dick hole. Oh my god. So that's one of the things you got him? Yeah. And what's the other thing you got him? And the other thing I got him actually is baby foot. Do you know what baby foot?

I beg your pardon? Is that Sammy Higarts new band? No, that's his island. Oh right. Baby foot island. I have heard of baby foot. Yeah, so it's this thing. I don't know what it is.

Basically what you do Scott is you put this, there's this gel and it comes in these plastic bags and you put your feet into the bags and it comes in these plastic bags and you put your feet into the bags and you like tape them up and tape them closed and you put your feet in them for like 45 minutes or something and then when you take them off it looks like nothing happened but over the course of two weeks your skin will peel off on your feet revealing the baby is layer of your foot so so supple. All the bad is gone. Okay, you have a foot fetish. This sounds nice.

It was a thematic gift. Do you see your skin peeling off? Do you peel it off? You shouldn't grab it yourself. They say don't peel it yourself because even though you'll really want to, Paul, you'll really want to because- Do they say that?

Yeah. That you'll really want to? It says like in like, there's four lines. It'll be a powerful desire. You really, really, really want to. You've say that? Yeah, really want to. It's going to, it says like, there's, there's a powerful desire. You really, really, really want to, you've got, you're dying to, you're, you gotta do it. You just gotta do it. But you can't do it because we shouldn't do it because it basically kind of messes up the process a little bit. Cause you start to appeal, you feel to the point where it's, you appeal it to the old, to less than a baby to an embryo. Yeah, it's bad. It goes back in time It becomes a zygote. This sounds like jackass forever and ever well

Wait, wait, wait, wait, silly if you can do it with your feet. Why can't you do it everywhere? Like can't you do with your face? You know the thing is that what about baby feet is that it says don't use it if you're pregnant or breastfeeding all these things I'm like, I wonder what's going on with baby feet is that it says don't use it if you're pregnant or breastfeeding all these things I'm like I wonder what's going on with baby feet yeah what's in there I would just put it on my feet because it's like that seems pretty low stakes and it works out really well anything above the ankles though you wouldn't you wouldn't dare I'm not covered in calluses anywhere else I would say what about your ashy elbows well my, my ass is a callus.

You know what? That's probably true. All our asses are kind of a callus. No! Asses are calluses. You know that's going to be the title. It better not be. I forbid it. I could just see it tight the second you did it. Is Babyfoot made of the same stuff as the Plan B pill? Something's up in there. I don't know. Asses are basically like the nature's chair.

Asses are nature's candy. Candy? You millennials. Well that's a very sweet Valentine's Day gift. No it's not. Yeah it is. He's gonna like it. He doesn't want Liam to give him some like chocolates and a rose. Like he's gonna like these presents.

I want those chocolates. I want chocolates and a rose. What are you getting for your chosen family? Me? Yeah, for Valentine's Day. The rest of your chosen family. My Galentines? Yeah, your Galentines?

Your Palentines? I'm not getting any, well, I sent Valentine's to my whole family. I sent Valentine's with Holly's picture in there. Yeah I have this this this mini Polaroid printer called a mini insta X It's like very small It's about the size of a phone and you can send pictures from your phone and print them out in little Polaroids It's really cute. And so I and you can write on them

It's like the size of a Polaroid picture like a thin mini one Okay, so you it converts your your pictures that are in your phone into little Polaroids, yeah It's very cute so I taped that into the little Valentine's and we've talked about so many Companies that could be sponsoring us right now All of these things. Come on, guys. This is at least giving us something for the buzz marketing. Jesus Christ. What are you getting your honeys for Valentine's Day? Now, my gift might not sound romantic, but I think it is.

I'm going out on a limb and getting nothing. Me too. What kind of fucking limb are you guys on? Get it together. We're going away. Get some flowers. No, we have so many flowers around here. We don't need it anymore. So you're going away. We're going away. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But Cool-Ops planned it all.

Oh, okay. You should get something. Get her something? Jesus Christ. It's tomorrow. I'd have to get it together so quickly. I think you can and I think you should. Something that would be there when we arrive. I think you will and I think you can, and I think you should. Something that would be there when we arrive. I think you have done it. Where you're going, is there like postmates or grocery delivery?

And will you need roads? Because you could order a cake. We're going into the future with Doc Brown. You could order a little cake. Oh, a little cake, a patty cake, baker's man. Yeah. OK, give me some ideas, because ideally it would be something the hotel would provide.

Oh, let's see. Mexican devil mask. Oh, yeah, that's great. The hotel will provide. Well, you could get her a massage at the hotel. I don't think we have time. She planned everything out already. Oh, OK.

Oh, well then fuck her. You could fuck her. Let me see if we have time for that. Do I have a spare three minutes? Boink, boink, wee! What, today and your birthday? That's the title, Boink, Boink, Wee. Boink, Boink, Wee is an acceptable title.

I think you could get, well you should get her a card and write her a nice message. Why not? Yeah, you're right, Scott, I'm with you. Don't do it. What the fuck? Yeah, don't get her a card. Do you have a nice note?

Do solidarity on this. We've been together too long. It's not meaningless to have a message written to you. Scott and I are, of course, getting each other stuff for Valentine's. Yes, of course. Which we do every year. Yes.

Paul, you're not getting Janie anything for real? No, we don't really observe it. And listen, I've checked with her so many times, like, you don't really you don't care about this, right? She goes, No. And I'm like, does she secretly and she's just lying? Here's what I think you should do. It's not hard. Okay, Tony. Because she says she doesn't care. It's just gonna be a fun surprise. You just go get her a bouquet of flowers. But then he has to do it every year. And also, it's just gonna be a fun surprise. You just go get her a bouquet of flowers. But then he has to do it every year. No he doesn't, and also it's not that hard

to do that every year. Two things, one time she did want to go out for Valentine's Day, and we went out to dinner to one of our favorite restaurants, and it sucked because Valentine's Day. Oh, going out on Valentine's is the worst. Yeah, which I tried to tell her, but she didn't seem to understand.

This is Valentine's week, by the way, on freedom. So, yeah, we're OK. I know it's a few days after Valentine's Day, but this is a big week for the podcast. As everyone knows, find your find your freedom on Valentine's Day. But she's men do not believe in Valentine's Day, however, these men, these men are podcasting fully about Valentine. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, we hate it. That's part of Valentine's Day. So after that, she was fully on board with like,

yeah, that sucked, and we shouldn't do that again. I agree. We need six months after Christmas to wind down from present time. Oh, yes, we need six months after Christmas. I mean, we've done this holidays rescheduling. And I know. Look, I just think it's so easy. I told Mike, I said Valentine's coming up, like about 10 days ago, I was like, just so you know, it's almost Valentine's Day. Cause he never knows what the day is or what the date is. He doesn't know what's going on.

Just so you know. I said, it's just so you know, it's coming up. So I do want something. And I, it's not hard. It's not fucking hard. I want flowers or I like chocolate. You can go to, you can go to the fucking grocery store and get me flowers and chocolates. I'd be like, that's awesome. It's not hard. I'm not doing that, Lauren. Ugh. This reminds me. Why do you hate this? Why do you hate this?

I will tell you exactly why I hate it because what Valentine's Day is to me is the memory, and it's not like a vivid memory anymore, but the memory of all the Valentine's Day days when I was not with someone and desperately wanted to be with someone, and it was just like a reminder of you are alone and no one loves you.

And when I think about it, I think there are so many other people that are experiencing that, even though I have somebody now, it's a shitty holiday because there's a lot of people that are lonely and want love and they don't have it. I just think it sucks. And I I'm reminded of all the Valentine's Day where I days where I broke up with my girlfriend a

week before so I wouldn't have to buy them something. Sure of course. Can I say all this talk of flowers reminds me of a jingle that I used to hear on the radio in Philadelphia many many years ago that and that, I think it's like in my was, well, you can buy flowers for yourself was the theme of the jingle. And I can't remember what florist it was. It was a, it was a. They're like, there's a whole untapped market of lonely people out there.

Exactly. Later, of course, used in the, how to lose a guy in 10 gay, 10 gay. 10 gays. Here, okay. I'm gonna let you have sex with 10 other men and then I'll break up with you. No, you're definitely gonna lose him at that point.

You get 10 gay men. He'll realize how fun it is. To make you, make your girlfriend break up with you. So in the movie, How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, Matthew. Hallelujah. Hallelujah guys. Hallelujah guys in 10 gays. Hallelujah guy in 10 gays. Hallelujah guy in 10 days. Hallelujah. Hallelujah guys. Hallelujah guys in 10 days. Hallelujah guy in 10 days.

Hallelujah guy in 10 days. Father God, we pray. Hallelujah guys in 10 days. He is an advertising executive and the campaign that he comes up with for women to buy diamonds for themselves is, and I quote, frost yourself.

Oh. Here's the jingle. Here's the part of the jingle that I remember. So treat yourself to a bouquet. Flowers. Pick up some flowers. You really started high. That's how the guy does it.

I loved it. I know, but like, you could have picked any key, and you picked such a high one. I loved it. Because I was so high. Don't such a high one. I want it No, because he wanted to do it right Scott That's I have you think you are on the exact pitch. He did it. Yes. I do I have a good I have a good I have a good memory for these things. Okay, I don't

Side-by-side compare II Wish I could find this fucking jingle. Yeah, here wish you could too. Now here's a question Scott. Yep. Cool Up is planning a whole Valentine's excursion. And now how in your mind does that equal she doesn't need a gift? Okay so. Because she likes it. Sometimes we take turns doing this stuff.

Like when we were able to leave the house on our anniversary, we, it became like too much of a thing where like we both had to celebrate an anniversary every year. So I, so we were like, okay, let's switch off planning something. So maybe this is the Valentine's year. She plans. And then I do something. I can't remember what we did last year, but, but you know what I mean? Maybe it's the switch off. Last year you did nothing. Next year you'll do nothing. No, that's great. I do. I do do flowers occasionally, but we'll be out of town. So it's like, no, no, that's fair enough. And I know you've given you've gotten her flowers many times. And, and Paul, I'm just saying it's just, it could just be cute, you know, to just show up

with a little bouquet. I just think it's cute. Little the way I do it. Not the way I do it. A hat, little bouquet, tails, looking like a penguin. Crying ice cubes. Crying. Forget it. Well, Lauren, I think it's nice that you guys observe it, but that- He doesn't care. I forced it. Of course he doesn't care. I think it's your personality though, Lauren.

I love holidays. You love holidays. You love holidays. Your mind is constantly, whenever you see something like a product You think you think of the person in your life that would like that and you file it away I was wondering where this is going. That's nice. Yeah, and yeah, you know what I mean? And I think that's true My mind is you got me that Vitamix. Yeah My mind is more like Always thinking My mind is more like always thinking of myself.

Oh my God. But not everyone. You're like my, you're like my, my sister-in-law. She's very much like that too, but not everyone is, it's not everyone thinks that way. Like I'm just trying to keep it together, man. No, no. And I know that. I know that. I know that.

I know that. I know that., but not everyone thinks that way. Like I'm just trying to keep it together, man. No, no. And I know, I know, I know. Look, Janie and I are hanging by a thread and so I don't think this is going to do it. So yeah, everything's in such peril that a bouquet is not going to turn it around. I think it would actually hurt more than help. Yeah, because she's going to go, oh, you think I fucking care about Valentine's Day? You don't pay attention.

I don't like Valentine's Day. I already told you that. And by the way, Paul took Janie to Jackass Forever on Valentine's Day. How was that? I was sad that I missed that. It was really fun. Janie, this was her first experience

with Jackass of any sort. What? Yes. She'd never seen any of it before. I used to love the show. She was not, I would not say she was an enthusiastic fan. I think she was. I don't think now is the time to be introduced.

I think you have to have some nostalgia. I was saying to Paul, yeah, this one is a little too, a little more extreme than the others in certain aspects of it. So it's like, it's like, we, Paul and I have seen previous ones and we're like charmed by it or won over by it. And now for this one to be someone's first, uh, it would be, yeah, it would be a little weird. Yeah, I think. But she started off kind of laughing at, you know, but as it went on, she was laughing less and less.

There were things that she just could not look at like anything with bugs, anything with, you with you know vomit whatever Well, but we kind of went off on them. Did you see that Peter was upset? Peter Pan Peter Pan From Neverland and he said you fucking ass. You guys gotta grow up at some point I'm being chased by alligator now this you mean you call yourselves jackass. They've you got that right? Dye your hair, come on. Then he went back.

He dyed his hair? Take a bell. No, he doesn't dye. Well, what's weird in the movie is he dyes it for some scenes and let it go gray for other scenes. Here's what I had heard last night, because I was curious about that too, is that they started filming, then

they had to stop for the pandemic. And then during quarantine, he grew his hair out and he's like, hey, I actually like this. I'm gonna stop dying my hair. And so he did. And you know what? It looks good. It looks good. I wanna see that.

I wanna see what his hair looks like. Can I- You should go see Jackass forever, see the first scene with his hair and then walk out. That's all I want. Yeah. So you're saying PETA has an issue. That's a real stretch. Oh, I like it with the gray hair. Yeah. I think that's what I'm seeing here. I mean, I'm not a huge fan of everything that PETA does. Yeah,, people have their problems with PETA. But I do find the guy, their animal guy, very suspect that he's willing to fucking trot

out these animals to do these stupid things. That does seem weird. Yeah, they basically just said that there were a lot of animals being tortured, even including spiders. They were like, they provoked the spider until it attacked it attacked or something yeah that's fine yeah but they got mad you know I mean spiders in my opinion are two seconds away from being dead by my hands if I you know so it's like I agree with that even the Tarantula sure yeah you're gonna you're gonna squash him with a paper or something a paper a

rolled up newspaper bowling A bowling ball. Oh my god. If I saw a tarantula, I wouldn't be happy. Now I've told you, I saw a tarantula in person one time on the side of Freiman Canyon, on a hill. Whoa, that's crazy. Valentino. That's crazy.

I miss something. When our nephew came out from Minnesota one year, he looked up all of the animals in California, like all of the, all of the like lizards and snakes and stuff that he wanted to see while he was out. That's so cute. And he and he looked up all the ones that were in California. And he was like, OK, I have this list. I have this checklist. Where can we see these? And in my head, I'm like, I don't fucking know.

With the zoo dickhead. So he so I was like, there's around my house. I was like, let's go on a hike. Let's go on a hike up in the, up in the Hills. And maybe we'll see some there. And he was like, you know, and we went on this hike and he was actively not enjoying being on the hike. Cause that was not family. That wasn't enjoyable to him. But, but then also mads that I couldn't just point out, Oh, there's that.

There's that. And then finally like a lizard came out and he, and he wasn't looking at it. And it's scampered away. Dude, you missed a lizard. I was like, I'm not going to do that. Right. It's like bird watching though. And then finally, like, a lizard came out, and he wasn't looking at it, and it scampered away. I was like, dude, you missed a lizard.

So he never saw anything? I don't think he ever saw it. Well, I think maybe he saw one thing at one point, and we checked it off the list. But he fully expected to come to- It was P22, the mountain lion. Fully expected to come to California and just, like, go to different places and see.

Yeah, he thought it's going to be a fucking Richard scary book. They have jobs or running a cars. I mean, I think it's adorable. We get it. We get Liz. We it was last year, I think, or the year before where there was a ton of lizards. And I thought I was the only one that I thought it was just happened. Like I was just noticing them more.

Yeah. But then somebody else, I think on Twitter or like somebody that I know is like have there just been way more lizards around than usual so I don't know but then they're not around anymore was that Janie on Twitter oh right Meanwhile, Paul's living in a lizard house. And then someone in my house said, is it just me? Living in a lizard house. But I love them. I say, this is a thing that I do around the house. I don't do this anywhere else, but around the house I do this.

If I walk into the yard or something and I see any kind of living creature, I will say hello to it. Yeah, that's cute. Thank you. We have the coyotes or two. Cool Up by the way is taken to chasing the coyotes. Of course she has. What? No I saw one recently when I was out for a jaunt. Have you been jaunting lately? I was jaunting a little bit just to kind of get moving. And there was a coyote mere feet away from me

and I did get startled, but you know, it just walked away. She's running at them now. Well, we've been getting a lot like, I think I may have talked about this, but they've been in our yard a lot. So they like travel through our yard. Oh no, I didn't hear this, I don't think. Oh, okay, they travel through our yard from the back. Uh, and then go out.

Travel through our yard. And we catch them on the cameras and they'll, it'll be in the middle of the afternoon. We no longer let our dogs out. You can't. You cannot, you No, you cannot. You must not. But then our neighbor came over. I guess one of our neighbors is this very elderly woman. So someone on her behalf came over

and said a lot of the coyotes are jumping over our fence into her yard and then just laying there all afternoon. No. And they were like, is there any way you can raise your fence up so they can't get over? And so we, we measured the fence and it's like five and a half feet, but the tallest you can have it as six. So we're like, we're not going to spend thousands of dollars to raise and they can jump over six. We have a six feet foot fence. They jump over all the time. Some spikes on it or something,

you know, like where or it angles at the top. It doesn't have to be dangerous but like. Like spikes with other coyotes heads on them. Yes exactly. Really send a message. And one George W Bush mask. Like in Game of Thrones. There's nothing but death for you here.

What are they afraid of and get a big plastic version of one of those like you do an owl to scare away birds. Oh you know is it like you put like deer piss all over the place? We did. We did do the deer piss. Well, that did not did not do anything right. Why do they not like deer piss? Maybe they're scared of deer. I thought they would go after them.

Get it. Yeah, I don't know. Deer are slightly bigger, so maybe they're scared of them. But we did put like, I'm bigger than a fucking deer. Sly, sly, sly, sly. Oh. We put the flashing lights that look like animal eyes around the house. Ooh, that's creepy. We haven't seen them since.

Jesus. OK, Halloween. That sounds terrifying. That was four days ago. We haven't seen them since. So maybe it's working. I have no idea. There you go.

I want to see these lights, though. That's weird. I want to see the lights, too. Lights, lights. Yeah. But what is that from? What is it from? It's a Kanye West. I'm to see the lights too. Lights, lights. What is that from? It's a Kanye West. I'm sorry, yay.

You're forgiven. Yay! Seems like a cool guy. The more I hear about him. Hey, how about Koda, nominated for an Oscar? Loved that film. How did you get there? Are we on a morning radio show? In entertainment news, Koda nominated for an Oscar, loved that film. How did you get there? Are we on a morning radio show right now?

Laurie, what happened to you? In entertainment news, Kona nominated for an Oscar. Cause I thought of Kanye. No, I don't know, it somehow led me to that. I thought of Kanye, then Kodye, then Ye. Koda, sure. Kona 2020. Yeah, I don't know what got me there.

What was it? 2012. 2012. Was it Kona? Coney Coney Coney Kona is a coffee, right? It was a kind of Paul's famous punchline That ironic bit that went too far But yeah conversation going nominated for Best Picture, also the father in it nominated for supporting that. Did you see his video where he got nominated?

Oh no, I did too. I gotta check it out. He was so shocked he fell backwards over his chair and he was filming it. Oh no! It's funny. That's adorable. He was terrific. He's so good.

And Marlee Batlin is great. She's fantastic. Absolutely. She won an Oscar in the 80s. I used to wait on, yes she did, for Children of a Lesser God. I used to wait on her at Tower Video back in the day. What? Yes, yes, yes.

Any memories of what she got? I remember she came back with, I think it was Little Nicky. And she returned and said, this movie was awful. Wow. Wow. I don't know what to tell you, Marley. I don't make the films, I just rent them. Maybe the voice doesn't translate into the subtitles.

Because the voice is really funny. If you don't have the little Nicky voice, it all falls apart. But I think you can tell what he's doing when you see it. Yeah. Oh, I think you get the idea, sure. I think you get enough of an idea to say, I don't like this. I don't think I've seen that one. That's Scott Hasenzeen.

We talked about it a lot. Wow, it's coming up. I believe on last Friday's episode. Was that a bomb, that movie? Yeah, it was his first one where he was like paid a lot of money and then it bombed. Right. But then he has like, his company has like a formula, right? Where it's like, now they know. Yeah. They know that if, what is keeping Formula 410, by the way?

I know, come on. It's been so long. They got to 419 and they stopped working on it. I think they did. That's how it was perfect. I mean, they on. It's been so long. They got to 409 and they stopped working on it. They worked so hard on the first 408. But they have a formula where it's like this, this is how much money it's going to cost and this is how much money it's going to make. And it works every time. Oh, I'm sure. Yeah. I mean, how much did they pay you to do the wrong missy? You can't trick me into this one. To do the wrong missy. You can't trick me into this one Yeah, it's all based on actor's if we guess if we guess

You are a freak Scott you're being very freaky today, I'm so freaky I'm not going to take you home to mother What was it? What's the one? She's on the what is it the kind of girl you read about in Newsweek magazine in Newsweek magazine that's right I want to say time for something in the what in the super freak but they say that the kind of girl you read about in Newsweek magazine. Why would it be in Newsweek? that's my that's my thing why would a week of news and sometimes- It feels like it would be in the inquirer. But he's talking about how freaky she is,

not how like high class or newsworthy she is. She's, excuse me, excuse me. She is a super freak. And if you think that's not newsworthy, I don't know what to tell you. Well, maybe he's talking, it's in the sort of context he was talking about. She's a very sexy girl.

The kind you don't think. I'm so sorry. She's a very sexy girl. I do apologize. I do. I'm so sorry. She's a very sexy girl. I do apologize. I do apologize. What's that? So Paul has a late breaking update. What is it?

That girl is pretty wild now. The girl's a super freak. The kind of girl you read about in the New Wave magazine. Oh, see that's- That makes a lot more sense. That is, it makes sense. The kind of girl you read about in Reader's Digest. Why don't we all go around and name our favorite New Wave magazine. Start with Lauren.

Lauren? My favorite New Wave magazine is Bob. Good one. Scott? Bob. Mine's Opab. Yep. Classy.

Three great New Wave magazines. Really good stuff. I love that. That's like the private dancer misunderstanding that I had where it was Deutschmarks or dollars American Express will a dime? I charge my penny candy. Yeah, I'll grind on you. Give me a dime. Is that what that song is about? Private Dancer.

I thought you had a misunderstanding with your private dancer where you couldn't tell if she said Deutschmarks or dollars. Yeah, because she was singing it. And I'm like, just say it. But wait, is it about someone grinding on someone or just someone who's like, hey, come over and dance around like ballet style for me? Yeah, that's what it is. That's that's what I choose to believe.

Oh, you're so wholesome. You remember when you just are, Scott, you can't change. Do you remember, Paul, when the song Erotic City came out I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do that. I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do that. I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do that. I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do that. I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do that. I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do that. I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do that. I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do that. I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do that.

I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do that. I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do that. I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do that. I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do that. I'm not sure if you're gonna be able to do that. can fuck until the dawn making love till cherry's gone. Till till it's gone. Oh, still there. We try to get in there. Let me dip in. Gotta keep going. But OK, so the plausible deniability is Prince says he's saying we can funk

until the dawn. Of course, but it does not sound like he's saying funk. It just sounds like. And by the way, the very next line is making love till cherry's gone. Right? Do they, do they, on the radio, do they, on the radio, do they bleep funk? So, no, so, so it lasted maybe two full weeks. And by the way, I'm, I'm 14 and horny when I'm hearing this. I are? I'm just going crazy. He said it. Scott's like, by the way, I never told you guys. I'm 14 and horny. Oh, yeah.

I meant that right now. I'm 14 and horny. There's something fun about me. I'm 14 and horny. I can't believe we never talked about this. He's 14 and horny. I'm at 11. They call him the horny 14-year-old.

You've read about him in Newsweek, but now we're going to interview him live. So they played it for like a good two weeks, unedited on Kiss FM, top 40 radio, and they must have gotten so many complaints, but this was Prince at the height of his powers that they had to play it because it was a hit. So they then did like a mix where they took out that one line and like did a backwards thing. They never bleeped it or whatever. But it was just it was wild. Crazy to me that they thought they could get away with it for a while.

And they do think who do you think Narked? I know. Yeah. I hate marks. Probably someone's mom. Yeah. My parents, when they saw in the Columbia record club that I ordered Princess Purple Rain they put a stop to it that is just they're like no we are not gonna have that record in the house same as when they when I said I watched a Monty Python movie at my friend's house. They were like, he's a dirty old man. Oh dear.

Oh, mom and pop, no. No. I don't care if he is royalty. You're not listening to Prince. Lauren, what about you? Yeah, Lauren, did your parents ever say you couldn't watch or listen to anything? I might have mentioned this once.

I bought, I went to Barnes and Noble with my dad and I bought, what is that book? Go Ask Alice. Oh my, you bought Go Ask Alice? Yeah, and then my mom saw it and she said I couldn't read that. One pill makes you horny. Because I was like nine or something. But it's like, it's exactly for you. No, but I mean I was too little to even know about drugs.

And nine, hmm, you gotta tell them early. But- You can read that phony book. I think I still read it though, because then I was really intrigued. Of course. What was the one with flowers in the attic? That was the one that like everyone I knew could have got incest. Oh, isn't that some incest?

Yes. When I was a kid, yeah, that was a big deal. Yeah, I never read that. All my female relatives, my cousins and all that all loved, they, well, I don't know if they loved it, but they talked about it. Because it was, it was, they were trapped in an attic. Is that what it was? Yes. It was, it was kids who were.

A mean lady was raising these kids and she trapped them in the attic. So it wasn't like an Anne Frank situation. They were trapped in the attic. No, it was not an Anne Frank situation? They were trapped in the attic! No, it was not an Anne Frank. They were not hiding. They just were not allowed out. Okay, and then they were so... They were growing up and they had to grow up this way

and they were so horny that they got it on together. Yeah, they were the only people they ever saw. I don't know if we can try to justify what happened in the book. I mean... If you're that horny. What if one of them had been gay? OK, you are 14. And then the other one's like, are you fucking kidding me?

I'm trapped in the attic with you. Sorry, doesn't do it for me. That would be a bad situation to be trapped in an attic. I believe that would be bad as well. I bet there's an upside to it. Yeah, true. Nothing is completely terrible. Yeah, I mean, the pandemic is sort of a flowers

in the attic situation for a lot of people. True. And I had sex with my siblings. We don't even live in the same place. You guys are sick. Lauren, you know you love it. I was allowed pretty much to read anything. That was what was so strange was I was able to read Stephen King books. I was able to. I remember reading the Omen when I was like eight. Oh, they didn't just, they just didn't

want you looking at things or listening to things. You can imagine whatever you want. Yeah. I don't, I don't know what it was was and they read Stephen King books and it was fine Weird yeah, the rules seemed a little blurred from time to time. It was blurred lines. It was total word crimes situation, but word crimes So wait Lauren when you read go ask Alice were you What was it like for you? Were you like? Oh my god, this true story is terrifying. I loved anything sort of crazy like that. Like I read when I was in like, I was probably 10 when I read Go Ask Alice and I read Forever by Judy Blume.

What's the deal in that one? What happens? Well, there's a lot of talk of a penis. Yeah, there's a lot of talk about penis. Is that the one where it's like we must we must we must increase our bust No, I would think that's from are you there got it to me Margaret or maybe not But but forever was like her first sort of grown-up. No, all right This was for adults and it was about a girl who has sex with the man she and they go skiing or something I don't remember all the man and they go skiing or something. I don't really remember all the details. Wait, she has sex with the man and then they go skiing?

Maybe they went skiing first. And then his penis was named something like Henry or Harry or something fucking weird. And I remember that really well. And except for the part that I don't remember anything about it. But I just remember being like, wow, this is crazy that I'm reading about this. And that was always pretty exciting. I feel like now with the internet, that kind of thing doesn't really happen as much anymore that you're excited about an illicit book. Right.

You can just Google anything you want. I read Mouse the other day. And- Oh, that one that was banned? Yeah, my teacher got very upset at me. So you and Coolop were role playing banned books banned books. She was my teacher. I read mouse in front of her. I theorized about a race very critically and I got in trouble. Okay, we have to take a break. Let's talk about it on the other side of this. Okay. But let's ban books. Yeah.

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And we're back. Lauren, you had a list of banned books, books you wanted to ban. Yeah, I got a lot of stuff to say. The Bible. No, but I just think it's so cr- Matthew, Mark, Luke, John. This banning books debate,

it's like, why do we live in the past? It is crazy how everything just happens over and over again. It's so stupid. Let's ban future books. Is that what you're saying? Well, yeah, we should ban topics from being written about. That way we don't have to have this problem. Why don't we make up books that contain all the things

that people are afraid they contain, and then we say it's banned? Yeah, that sounds good. The three of us write a book that has everything- No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. We don't write it. The book never exists. Picture these committees though. We just make it up. Yes! The three of us write a book that has everything... No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no It's a psychological operation. Okay. Or it could be a psychedelic operation, you know what I'm saying? I'm already writing.

Yeah, I'm sorry, we've already written it. Lauren and I have written this book. Oh, well, I'm tripping balls. So we're gonna keep a copy for ourselves, right? Just so we know what we wrote. We'll burn and ban all the other copies. Burn and ban! The ones that we wrote are good.

And do you know what it's selling on AirBnB? Yeah, I have an AirBnB that's all banned books. It's like the wrote are good. And do you know what it said about someone Airbnb? Yeah, I have an Airbnb that's all banned books. It's like the walls are aligned. A forbidden Airbnb. I went to an Airbnb. And the only kids can rent it. I went to an Airbnb, speaking of Airbnbs and books. Thank you for justifying it.

Where the owner had filled it. Every shelf everywhere had Tash and books everywhere. Oh, my God. They're so expensive. He just went to that's why they had to Airbnb the house. Well, OK. I can't pay for these books. I believe on another show I said whose house it was. It was Christian Adugé's house. Right. Who's that?

He's the guy who who ruined Ed Hardy. Right. Yeah. Ed Hardy and Fond Dutch. It's his Airbnb? Well, it was one of his houses, right? And just for the record, so everyone knows those Tashin books. Does everyone know what that is? I mean, it's like those huge books, art books. Yeah, I know what it is. I know you know, but I'm saying maybe someone's never heard of that.

Well, I'm part of everybody. Ah, whatever. No, Tashin books are like art books that are that are big and very expensive. And so so the caretaker of the place said, Oh, yeah, Christian used to just go to the Tashin store at the Grove and just get like one of everything. It's so uncreative and stupid. It's very stupid. I'm jealous.

What I love about that, give me the whole store. What I love about that store at the Grove is that it's really part of the farmers market. So like you can still smell the fish of the farmers market. And then all you turn a corner and then there's this like open air stall of Tashin books. It's so incongruous with where it is. That's why I love about it. It does seem weird. But you know, I just don't, I don't like the idea of just having a collection just be,

I'll just take all of those. It's like so like he never opened one. He doesn't care. No, and I don't think we ever. Books, you know what I mean? They're picture books. Yeah. Yeah. I don't think we ever even opened one while we were there. No, and I actually have a couple I've never opened that were given, you know, it's kind of like. Which ones do you have? My house is filled with them. I've never opened them.

I don't know. Wait, you're talking about me. I live in the Tashin's. I'd have to go look and see what they are. But one is like, um, I can't tell you. Um, yeah, I could look at my picture. One is a picture of Dix. Yeah. Well, it's kind of like, actually, it was a thing that like Mike's agent would like give him these big books every once in a while.

That's cool. Yeah, it's a nice gift. But they're just really good job next time. Hey, how about you stop? That's anytime my agents are giving me a Christmas gift, it's like, hey, how about a job instead? Yeah. Why don't you direct this energy for buying books towards pitching me to people? It's not their job. Oh, is it? All they can do is negotiate the deal.

No, it is. Agents only can negotiate deals and managers can only give you advice about what you should be doing yourself. Exactly. This is exactly right. Yeah. What's up with that? What's up with that?

I love that sketch so much. No, I think I've mentioned this before, but it's called What Up With That, but they sing What's Up With That. Now, What Up With That? That should be the whole premise of an episode. I'm just always wondering, when did it change? And why didn't it change the name?

Kenan Thompson is very funny to me. And when did they know it? He's very funny. I've been watching him since I was a wee child. I know you. It was going to be Kenan and is very funny to me. And when did they know it? He's very funny. I've been watching him since I was a wee child. I know you was gonna be Kenan and Kel show and Good Burger and so forth. All that. All that.

I thought Kel was very funny in Good Burger, which I saw for the first time last summer. And then saw it subsequently five more times because of a few nephew. Hello, welcome to Good Burger. Wow. Welcome to Good Burger, home of the Good Burger. Hello, welcome to a good burger. Wow. Welcome to a good burger, home of a good burger. Can I take your order?

Yeah, so good. Classic. Never seen it, never seen it. I don't remember the plot at all. It's fun, I like it. Nice. It's no coda. Gosh. I remember once on Twitter, I wanted to, I was asking people to show me pictures of food

shaped cars. Yes, I remember that. And then a lot of that was a big day for me when you did that. It was fun because there were a lot of that I was not aware of. But so many people sent the good burger car and it's like it's too much car. It's not accurate. You need it to be a basically a strawberry on wheels. Yeah, you need it to be like the it's too much car. It's not accurate. You need it to be basically a strawberry on wheels. Yeah, you need it to be like the Oscar Meyer Wienermobile.

Yeah, I mean, that's the classic one, right? The gold standard. How many times have you seen the Wienermobile? I've seen it probably three times. Always really exciting. Yeah, always exciting. What does it travel around doing? I've never seen it in person,

but I do know someone who used to work on the Wienermobile. Wow. Work on it. Good friend of mine. Mechanic? She was. Yeah, they had to like butter up the ends. She put in the oil slick and the smoke screen and all that stuff.

The machine guns. Yeah, the changing headlights. The headlights. Yeah. No, she was like one of the, one of the, the team of people that drove it and would, they would go around to different places. Yeah, what do they do? Where are they going?

I still don't know. They're not they're not giving away hot dogs, are they? I don't know if they're giving them away or selling them, probably giving them away. But they're like they're just brand ambassadors. They really it's like a it's like a program that you do out of out of college, I think of the kindness of your heart. It's a philanthropic organization where they just drive around throwing a hot dog out the window. I mean, I it is so exciting to see it.

I wish I could see it today. Well, where where does it originate from? And maybe we should go there in the morning and stake it out and then follow it around all day. Yeah. I don't know where we record an episode. I'm I'm I don't believe it originates in Los Angeles. I think it's based somewhere else. No.

We're going to have to fly there? But it, yeah. If we want to do this right. I love things like that because it feels like it has been decades and decades of joy with just the same idea. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's so simple. And my friend, the last time I was in town, she went and visited with somebody

else who wanted to see it. And she was, she like, was talking to the crew and like said something that they realized, oh, she used to work on this thing because it's like, there's a lot of the same protocols. How much hang time on the wiener. You have a hot dog name? Yeah. You have to have a hot dog based name. Well, that doesn't leave a lot of options. It's like a pun on your name that is somehow connected to hot dog,

either hot dog or condiments. How do we do this? So Paul, you'd be like pickle fried Tompkins or like. Something like that. Yeah, Scott would be obviously Scott dog obviously okay the more I know Lauren would be Lauren Lauren okay let's think of the things that are associated with hot dogs buns pickles relish mustard onions ketchup none of that sounds like Lauren lab ketchup you might have a lab ketchup but what could my name be Chicago dog no maybe yeah I think so no I think sorry sorry I'm sorry to do you want me to texture right now and ask? Yeah, yeah.

Could Lauren be called Chicago dog? You're this close with this wiener mobile girl? Oh yeah. And she's a wiener mobile mobile mobile. You're on a text chain? Just text her can Lauren be Chicago dog? Don't text her any other context. No explanation.

And see if she. I bet she will. I want to be hot dog butt kiss. I think that's better. Can you believe that Dick Butkus got away with having his name be that he wanted it to be? We had a time machine right now. You as a child, I was like, that's I mean, that's beyond the pale. Well, we had a politician in Evanston named Dick Durbin and Durbing was also a term for blowjobs. Really?

I don't know if that came after knowing his name. Durbing was it? I've never, I don't think I've ever heard that before. Yeah, I don't know if that, so maybe people will tell me that's not a thing and that was just we named it after Dick Durbin. Dick Durbin. Isn't he a senator or a congressman? Yeah.

I don't know. What'd you do this weekend? I was up to a little Dick Durbin. He derbed. She derbed him. It's like grab ass. I don't want you to be in here just doing a bunch of Dick Durbin. Yeah. Go to sleep.

I legitimately thought you were yelling at Janie right then. You were so good at acting it. And you looked off to the side that I thought she walked in here. You were like, I don't want anyone in here. Be quiet. I'm podcasting. There are people like that. And that makes me so sad. I think I like to do on a zoom, a professional zoom, is if somebody has a dog

in the background that's barking, I will turn off and yell at my imaginary dog. So we're just talking and you hear the dog and I'll go, quiet, quiet. By the way, I love the genre of video of little kids coming in and disturbing people broadcasting live on television zooms. The best, the absolute best. It's the greatest genre. It should happen all the time.

It should be a joyful thing that we all celebrate instead of someone getting embarrassed. But I love when they get embarrassed too. But it brings everyone down to earth, you know? It's like, you think you're so special around the news. Well, here comes your kid talking about how they just pooped on the floor. Oh, I love it so much. Is the best one, is it the...

OK, the one I'm thinking of where the... Where the nanny came in and got the kid? Yeah, well, like... That was the wife. No, where the nanny came in and got the kid? Yeah, well like some, that was his wife. Yeah, thank you. Oh, sorry. Thank you, Paul. But like she was trying to duck.

I don't even remember what happened. She was trying to duck out of the way and all that kind of stuff. That was, that's the gold standard. The best part is that little girl marching in there. Like the way she walks in is like, she does like a little, here we go. It's so good. So good. I love it.

And then the fucking baby coming in. I reliving it and having a wonderful time. I mean, there's so many levels to that video. Yeah. It's so good. That was a highlight of quarantine, I think. But anytime any, just even a different little kid comes in, I still love it. Yeah. Or a dog or anything like that. I only like it when it's that one girl and she goes into different people's homes.

Yeah, yeah. She's dead, right? She's a ghost. That's right, stand your ground. She went to the wrong house. Don't you love that story of that kid who, or the lady who texted the kid about Thanksgiving, but it was the wrong number,

and then he's coming to her house all the time, and then he texts me. They're still close. They did it for like the sixth year in a row. I love it. It's the greatest. And then her husband died and the kid was like, or he's not a kid anymore, he's a grown man.

But he was like, you know, posting about that too. It's like, they developed a strong connection. Yeah. Yeah. It's very nice. I wish I had that kind of connection with anyone. Anyone at all. Isn't that hard that you don't? Text it or not, Just, you know.

Text cool up. See what happens. No, thanks. We got this big weekend coming up. I'll see you then. We're doing an all phones weekend where we are just on our phones the whole time. Can you tell us where you're going? Yeah, because we'll have already been there.

We're going to the Santa Inez Valley and doing some wine tasting and horseback riding and shit like that. Wow, fancy. Like the cover of a romance novel. Yes, I'll be shirtless. Yes. Long mane flowing, I grew out my hair. The horse will be shirtless and the long mane flowing.

But the horse will be wearing pants. I hope so. Nice. Do you want to join us? No. Yeah, I know. I told Scott this before he was going to go. I'm trying to put it in the context for the listener.

That we did a wine tasting one time. And anytime you step outside of Los Angeles to other parts of California, you are despised. And so we were at this place in one of the, I don't remember if it was Napa, Santina, someplace like that. And we were at the little bar of the wine tasting and we're with other people. And the woman who ran the vineyard was asking people where they were from. And these people said, you know, they said Colorado. And she goes, oh yeah, that's so lovely You know, I used to spend a lot of time there and blah blah blah and then she said

Hi Coors then she asked us where we were from and we said Los Angeles and she went oh and Then did not speak to us for the rest of the time we were there What? Yeah. Okay. People hate us. They hate us. I didn't know that. Yeah. Oh, they love it when we put out things like our big Hollywood blockbusters. Yeah, exactly.

Like, oh, they love Osmosis Jones, but they don't like the people who make it. Wow. Oh, they love all about Steve, but they don't want to know that you're a person with a beating heart. Yeah. Absolutely. Absolutely. Absolutely.

Oh, they love Absolutely Productions, but they don't want to know the people who are absolutely human. Oh my God, the ending of Nathan for you was so good. Yeah. Oh my God. The what? The ending of Nathan for you was so good. Yeah. Oh my god. The what? The ending of Nathan for you.

How did it end? I don't think I saw the last scene. He killed himself. With that, with that, where that guy was on a high wire. He was like, he would made it out. Do you know what I'm talking about? Yeah, I do. I don't.

So, keep going. Well, did you watch it, Paul? I can't describe it all. It's so good. Just watch it. Like, instead of hearing us dumbasses talk about ball? I can't describe it. Oh, it's so good Just watch it like instead of hearing us dumbasses talk about I can't explain it It's like it's so funny as it unfolds. I would just ruin it I'm okay with you ruining it, but for everyone Everyone's seen it who's going to see it. I can't I don't think it'll get even one more watch from Lauren

Just casually mentioning it. It will. All right. It's going to be watched a lot. If you've never seen Nathan for you and what Lauren said enticed you to watch it for the very first time, we want to hear from you. Can I just say the gas station episode, the gas station episode is one of the best episodes. I can't remember that one. That's the coupon, coupon for free gas episode. I don't think I saw that.

I gotta go back. So good. Ruin it for him. It's so funny, man. No, don't ruin it. I wanna watch it. Well, you should watch How To with John Wilson, cause he produces that.

I love How To. I love How To. I watched the first season and I just have, I was about to say, I haven't watched the second season yet, but the one with that naked guy in the first season was insane. You'll love Jackass then. Jackass forever.

If you like dicks, go see Jackass forever. Or watch porn. Even if you just like balls. Oh my God, my friend posted this TikTok video though. There's a TikTok trend. It's a Dick-Dock. It's a triple T? It's a Dick-Dock. It's a Dick-Dock trend. It's a dick-tock. It's a triple T. It's a dick-tock

Drend it's a tick-tock trend. I guess where you well, I didn't understand what was happening so I'm not turning myself out to be some saint, but I didn't understand what was happening when I watched this video and And he posted being like oh this really got me out and I and then I was like what is happening? I can't figure out why this is funny So what it is is you hear, it's just clips of people playing this one sound clip and then they see if the person next to them turns to look because of the sound that they're hearing. And it's a little musical sting.

And then if the person looks, they go, oh good. And if they don't look, they're like, whew. And then I figured out from someone else commenting that it's the beginning of porn, like a lot of porn videos start with the same musical sting. And so if the person looks, it's like they think that you're either watching porn or they're basically admitting that they watch porn.

Like this is what the bid is or whatever. And so it's like people like getting to see if seeing if their brother will like turn and they go, oh, or something like that. Is it as recognizable as like the Netflix? I think it is if you watch a lot of porn. Is it that? Yeah. Is it that? Dong dong.

It goes like this. Should steal that from porn? It's like they're hoping no one notices. I can't I can't I can't I can't do an impression of it. Is it like Law and Order? Dong dong. Ah, ding, let me say that. Yeah, that's the to me. That is the best part of the long or theme.

Yeah, that's a good. Here. Okay. Tic tac audio trend attempts to catch people who watch porn hub. I'll see if I can play this sound. Hold on. But then if you're doing it, then you also watch porn. So then it goes into daylight.

We couldn't hear it, but. Okay, Lauren, we couldn't hear it, honey. It's that. It's drums? Okay, I don't know. Okay, all right. But my feeling is if someone's playing a sound next to me, I'm gonna look. Yeah, because anything.

It's a sound. I guess it depends on the look on your face. If you turn around, you're like, what? I'm a whore? Oh yeah, or if you go like, ew, why are you watching porn? Then they go, you watch porn. I got you. Got you.

I got you. It's not what it is. Me, a man who watches porn. It seems like a confusing choice to me. Now I watch porn, but I don't masturbate. So I think that makes me kind to me. Now, I watch porn, but I don't masturbate. So I think that makes me kind of a cool guy. I watch porn, but I just do like interpretive dances to it. I'm neat.

I'm weird. To like the dialogue as well as the music? Whatever happens, happens. Is there, do they still do dialogue in porn? Or like, why was that? Like you used to rent a porn and you'd be like, God, there's so much story in this. They still have that problem, I would say. I bet here's the ideal porn.

What do you think of this? It's like fuck. It's like a person you see, like one hot person in a home doorbell rings. Yeah. Open a nice home, a nice home. Another hop doesn't have to be nice. Another hot person comes a home, doorbell rings, open the door. A nice home, a nice home. Another hot person, doesn't have to be nice, another hot person comes into the room, they look at each other, they slowly take off their clothes.

Then, yes, so you can build up to it. Sure, sure, sure. Then they, once they're completely nude, they look at each other and nod, and then they start fighting. They just do it. Yeah. I think Gabris said he, yeah on a podcast that he,

like John Gabris. Oh, John Gabris, yeah. He likes porn with a story, but he might be a minority there. Well, yeah, I mean, maybe it does it for some people. The acting is really bad. He might be in Minority Report? That's not a porn.

I said he might be in the minority, but the- What if Minority Report was all about catching people before they masturbate? I want porn with incredible- But the what if Minority Report was all about catching people before they masturbate? Underneath the water just like they sit up suddenly We have a red ball I want I want porn with a list actors doing an incredible scene. Well, that's the thing What if what if they were a list actors and then they stepped out and had body doubles for the porn part? That's fine. Yeah Okay, so you want a list actors yes, Justin Hoffman Meryl Streep

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knock it out with the easy button and move on to podcasting and parenting and hanging out with friends. For financial goals though, Acorns is my easy button for my finances this holiday season. Acorns makes it easy to start automatically saving and investing so your money has a chance to grow for you, your kids, and your retirement. You don't need to be an expert. Acorns will recommend a diversified portfolio that fits you and your money goals. And most importantly, you don't need to be rich.

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SEC registered investment advisor. view important disclosures at acorns.com slash podcarrosh. And we're back. We're so back. Time to play some people were thinking we weren't back. And I was like, that's the wisdom of the fool. They were wrong. Before we get into the feature, I have an update.

What? Oh boy. This is huge dog friend has written back. Oh my God. Oh my God. My wiener mobile pilot friend. My hot dog friend has written back. Wiener is my co-pilot. She says, great question.

Now here's what I wrote to her. Yeah, what did you write? Could Lauren be Chicago dog or Lauren bunkus with no, no, you know, whatever. She immediately knew what I was talking about. Great question. Chicago dog seems too far from her true Thank you. hot dogger identity.

That was why I ruled that way. And here's what you have to know is that there's so much pun stuff going on with the Wienermobile. She says Lauren Bunkus, however, really cuts the mustard. Wow. Oh. Wow. She told me one night she like, she remembered so many, so much of the little things they

had to say, they were all like hot dog puns. It was fucking wild. Love. Although, lap ketchup is like you're on your period. That's what I thought too. I didn't want to say it. How is that like you're on your period? Because when I bleed through my white jeans, I have lap ketchup. That's what happens. Okay.

Now it's time to play a three chirp-a-paw. No, no, no. Pickle, pickle, what else is that? Pickle fried pickle Tompkins. Pickle fried Tomp. Pickle and fries Tompkins. Pickle fried Tomp. Pickle fried Tomp ketchup.

Pipple, Pipple, Pipple. Scott Doggerman. Okay. Yeah. This is called, this game is called Thank You for Attending My Ted Talk. Thank you for attending my Ted Talk. Who sent this?

Adam. The first man? Wow. That's a get. One player loads up Wikipedia and goes to a random page. Now we are doing that via wiki roulette.co. They can refresh a few times until a page of an appropriate length comes up. They have 60 seconds to read the article. Then they must give a Ted talk on the subject while the other

two players are encouraged to ask questions. Did you click the link and something came up? I haven't clicked. Oh, did you send us the link? In the chat. It's in the chat. My dear boy. The link is in the chat. I's in the chat, my dear boy. The link is in the chat.

I'm going to do it on my phone. Uh, yeah, I got one. OK, so you want to give me 60 seconds? You can refresh it if you want a different one or. No, no, I mean, it's it's short. So do you want me to read it? Yeah. OK, I'm going to I'm going to time you. Hold on. I'm not looking at it.

I'm not looking at it. I'm not looking at it. Just wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I got to get my clock. OK, make sure that it's not on lap or whatever it was. And ready, set, go. You have 60 seconds to read the Wikipedia page. Now, at this point, I will be searching for something for myself that seems

to be the appropriate length. 60 seconds is kind of a long time, but I guess it's good. You got to really soak it up. So it is now who's doing it? Scott is doing it. So we'll talk. Yeah. So I've been just talking, talking, talking. Okay. Oh, I have an interesting one here that I'm curious to read about. Um, have you gotten, you're worried about him? Yeah. Yeah. Just like doesn't set the stuff with cool off does not sound good.

Well all the ways that they fight all the time and scream and how she was screaming that coyote because she really wanted to take it Out on Scott. Yeah. Yeah, that's exactly what he has 20 seconds left This is so crazy waiting for him to do this It's gonna hear me when I say this is so crazy waiting for him to do this. I'm going out of my mind. This is so crazy. Why does he go reading? Okay.

Guys, thank you for coming to my Ted talk. I'm here to talk about, would you say we're welcome to it? You're welcome for coming to my Ted talk. Um, I'm here to talk about the Would you say we're welcome to it? You're welcome for coming to my Ted Talk. Okay. I'm here to talk about the Ohio State University Press. Okay. Okay. The Ohio State. Okay. Now it looks like you're just reading. It does. I'm looking right at you guys. Okay. The Ohio State University Press. Close your eyes. Okay. The Ohio, the Ohio state university press is the university press at Ohio state. Uh, and we all know the university press is a, is a, uh, a printing press that, um, is

on college that publish colleges at colleges that publishes scholarly works. And this one has been around since 1957 and has published over one book and a lot more than that. But, but I know they've published at least one, I think somewhere in the 20,000 range. And it's Um, and, um, it's run currently by someone named Mr. Sanfilippo. Um, and, uh, it put out a book, uh, recently, uh, a few years back called how to, how to do something to a slave. I can't remember what it was, how to make a slave. I can't remember what it was. Yeah.

And, um, and that one, the, uh, yes. You have a question? Yeah. So it's a university press. So they publish collegiate works or they publish scholarly works. Certainly. I don't know whether they are published by by teachers who write them or I don't know who writes these things, to be quite honest. Yes. Paul, you know, and the gentleman who is now running the press, Mr. SanFilippo.

Yes, Mr. San have the question. And the gentleman who is now running the press. Mr. Sanfilippo, yes. Mr. Sanfilippo, yes. When did he become the gentleman that runs the university press? That was seven years ago or thereabouts. OK. And his first name is? I want to say Mr. OK, all right. So I did hear that correctly.

Yeah. I did hear that correctly. Yeah. Now they're, they also have an offshoot print, uh, called let Tino Latino something where they specialize in Latino books. And, um, that's very, very popular. So it's because it's called Latino something because that, that, that it's about everything. Yeah. If you're looking for something Latino, here's where you go. It's right there. You go to Ohio State University Press and it's offshoot. And you talk to Mr. Martinez. Yeah. Ohio, you know, is a state.

Right. You know, you know that. I don't think this is a part of the TED talk. You're just. Oh, no, this is part of my talk. OK. So Ohio is part of the state. Ohio is a state. It is a state. Yeah. And. So Ohio is part of the state. Ohio is a state. It is a state. Yeah, and There are many cities in Ohio Cleveland The rest so you're just filling in in some time now you this isn't about the university I feel like we've yeah, we've strayed away from I'm telling you everything. I was able to retain from this

And this is your TED talk, sir this. This is your Ted talk, sir. So do you have any more questions about this that I can? Yeah. Why did you do a Ted talk about this? I was forced to at gunpoint. Oh, my God. Well, they've kidnapped my wife and children. No. Who did this? It's a did you ever see Die Hard? Yeah. Yeah, actually, just for the first time.

It's my favorite Christmas movie Are you doing are you doing diehard for for new? Newcomers diehard and we just watched diehard for every episode No, they It was Ted. It was Ted did it He needs more people to do talks. Yeah Well, actually I'm being held at gunpoint right now and he wants me to do one. So he wants you to do one.

I have to kind of study up. So can somebody just tell me? Okay. Yeah. Do you have any more questions? No, I'm scared right now. No, no, you study up. You study up.

Okay. I lost interest. I'm sorry. But do you like books in general? You're happy about this. I like the idea of books. It grew on you a bit. So you like this. I like to. I mean, idea of books. It grew on you a bit. So you like this?

I like it. I mean, they did, quite honestly, they wouldn't have to kidnap my wife and children. Alright, Lauren, excuse me, sir. I have to time this lady for Ted. Okay. Alright, are you ready? Yeah. Three, two, one.

So you don't have any more questions? Not about that, but I have just personal questions. Okay, yeah, hit me. How tall am I? Oh, personal to you? Yeah. I thought it would be personal. Personal questions about me.

No, personal. That's surprising, but I'll roll with it. You're between four feet tall and 20 feet tall, I would say. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, great. Great. When am I going to die?

Hmm. Somewhere between 30 seconds from now and 1,000 years. I think that feels right to me. Yeah. Could God make a rock so heavy that he's like, why did I do this? Yeah, of course. He's God. He can do anything. Anything?

Yeah, anything. Can he make a plane take off before it landed? Oh, wait. Time. OK, I also had an idea that I should just... Oh, wait, I can't send you my thing because it won't be a link. Never mind. I was going to send it to you so that you my thing because it won't be a link. Nevermind. I was going to send it to you so that you could look at it while I talk about it.

That's okay. We'll just hear what you say. Okay. So here's what I'm going to tell you. I closed the window and I can close my eyes if you want me to. The Quaintance Block. Oh, thank you for coming to my TED Talk. Oh yeah.

I want to speak to you today about the Quaintance Block. Now the Quaintance Block was the first storefront in Golden, Colorado to be added to the National Historic Buildings Registry. Wait, it's an entire block or just one store on? It's a storefront, so it's called the Quaintance Block, and I can get into why that is, which I will. It's not time for questions yet. Well, excuse the fuck out of me.

This is in Golden, Colorado. And in 1994, they added the Quaintance block to the Registry of National Historic Buildings. And this this was the first one in Golden to be added. Now, in 1911, this man, Mr. Quaintance,

which he was pleased to make your. I like when they're funny. He, he, he opened up this, this set of three stores that were a brick and mortar storefront. They had a blonde, blonde brick in the back and a sort of red brick in the front. And he sounds like some women I know. Yeah. I'm with you. So what he did was he made one for his realty business

and then he also had one for his brother's business when he was a lawyer and then there was another one as well. And he would get people to stay at, oh wait, I remember what it was, Castle Rock. I would think so. Something, it's a hotel overlooking this area because he wanted to build this up into a sort of shopping area.

And these people would take they've come to take rides with donkeys burros as listed in like on donkeys or with them. They would ride them around because it was a Colorado you know mountainous area. They would take photos with donkeys and then he would develop their photos while they went on a ride. So he had a whole business. And this was 1911. This was a long, long time ago, over a hundred years ago, my dear boys. And he, that is all I really know. So I guess as far as I got, but he did that. What do you mean that's as far as you got?

You're the expert. As far as I got at being the expert. I don't know if you should have done this talk. Look I'm being held at gunpoint. What? I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. Oh my god.

We'll be cool. We'll be cool. The Quaintance block? Any questions about the Quaintance block? Yeah, what was his first name? This Quaintance guy. Yeah. And is he related to Rachel Quaintance block. Yeah, what was his first name? Quaint, this Quaintance guy. Yeah. And is he related to Rachel Quaintance?

Yes, he is. Wow. By marriage, by marriage. By marriage. And Castle Rock, is that any relation to Stephen King? Yeah, is it scary there? I think Stephen King was inspired by it because just Quaintance, often when he would be developing these

photos of people with their burros they would find that they were there was ghosts in them. Okay and of course in the burros in the in the in the pictures in the pictures of the burros and I mean the Shining is set in Colorado so obviously there's a connection there. When what are the other buildings that are legally landmark buildings? So I wasn't able when I when becoming an expert I wasn't able to click to a different page to read about that. But I can tell you right now I'm a little curious. No that's okay. No I want to know. I know. I want to know. I want to know. Thank you. National Register of Historic Places. No, it's got to be too many.

I can't even figure this is a nomination process. Oh, my. You're losing us. You're definitely out. I'm bored. I'm bored as shit. So why should we care? Why do you care about this? As stated by John H. Sprinkle Jr., Deputy Director of the Federal Preservation Institute.

Mr. Sprinkle Jr.? Sprinkle Jr. Why should you care about this? Why should we care? Because this is such a, you know, sometimes we think about big buildings like the, you know, Eiffel Tower. Every day.

Leaning Tower of Pisa. And we don't think about these little buildings that really matter. Oh, and they called it something funny. They called it the Spudnut or something. Does it lean to the side? You're looking at the page now. Now I am. They called it the Spudnut shop. But I did remember Spudnut. The Spudnut shop. Why would they? I mean, who names something the Spudnut shop?

Look, it's 1994. Things were different back then. 1994. Yeah. Wow. Who's holding you at gunpoint? Ted. Ted again? Jesus.

Shit, he's in your Zoom. Why didn't they call Ted to Ted again? Paul, he's holding you at gunpoint. Because Kenneth Brown is holding you at gunpoint. Oh, my God. I have to I have to do a Ted talk. Ma'am, why were you even? Oh, while he was typing. Yeah.

Don't press lap. Yes, sir. Are you doing it? Lap? No, you. OK. Well, I'm going to find the clock and do it. OK.

So while he studies, go ahead. I'm going to ask you a question. So why did you get interested in this? So I was always so interested in the Quaintance Block because... Have you ever been there? No, and I just knew... I had a dream about it actually that it... Before you even knew it existed. Exactly. I saw this beautiful brick and mortar shop and it had three little store friends

and I thought this is special. What I'm seeing here is special. They need to make this something that everyone knows about on a list. So when you looked it up, how are you dreamed about this place? How are you able to look it up? Like I don't think I could enter anything into Google from a dream that would make a subject come up. That's a great question, sir. I drew a picture of what I saw and then I uploaded to Google images and then it looked

exactly like this. Whoa. So it came up. Yeah. Crazy. So you're that good of an artist? Yeah, I really, really am. You want me to draw you? Yeah. Oh my God.

Look at that. Why, why am I wearing, why am I shirtless and wearing fireman's? Cause that's what you're wearing right now. Do you know where you are? I do. The jungle baby. You came to a Ted talking fire suspenders. Okay time Hi, welcome to my Ted talk, thank you so much

I'd like to talk to you about a song by the Scottish singer-songwriter Eddie reader It's a song entitled joke parentheses. I'm laughing Wow, I'm laughing, close parentheses. Wow. I'm already laughing at just him talking about it. That's a great joke. It reached number 42 on the charts. It was the second single off of the album that

was named something. And it was written by Boo Huirdine. You're reading this? No, I'm not. Boo Huirdine. I, Eddie, reader probably, and a third person. Wow. Boo Huirdine released his own version of the song on an album called Baptist

something. Baptist, the word Baptist was in it. on an album called Baptist something? Baptist, the word Baptist was in it. Okay. And the critical reception was not the best. It was called by the Trouser Press, a song that was sardonic, these are direct quotes, sardonic and that it quote, seethes with disdain, end quote. Is that a bad review?

Because there are certain songs that would have both of those qualities that would get good reviews. Well, it's a bad review because those are negative things. Well, OK. But like, if I listen to a punk song or a Nirvana song or something like that, they're talking about negative things. Excuse me.

Who do you think knows more about the tone of Trouser Press, me or you? Me? No, it's me. Because this is my TED Talk. How do you spell Eddie, by the way? E-D-D-I. That's true.

How do you spell Teddy? T-E-D-D-I-Y. And is he holding you at gunpoint right now? Yes. So is it Ted E. DIY, Ted DIY, because Ted do it yourself? Because you do it yourself. That's right. What band did Eddie Reader sing for before she went solo?

That's interesting. In my research, there was not another band named, but it's entirely possible that she's doing with, you're doing a whole Ted talk about this woman's song that you don't even know that you're saying for a different about this song, the, the, whatever band she may or may not have sung for in the past has no bearing on her single, her solo single that was the number two track off her album, but don't you agree that far more success as the singer of this band than she did in her solo single that was the number two track off her album that had a different name than the song. But don't you agree that she had far more success as the singer of this band than she did in her solo career? What band are you talking about?

Fairground Attraction. Fairground Attraction did fine, I'm sure. I'm sure they're all very nice people, but we're talking about Eddie Redder's song. Read her. Joke. Read her. Not Eddie Vedder.

Hey, hey sir, should you be up there doing the Ted Talk? Maybe I should. No, not about that. He shouldn't. Because what do you know about the song Joke? I'm laughing, close parentheses, other than what I've told you, which is that it went to number 42 on the Billboard charts. Well, I can tell you Trouser Press gave it a good review saying it was sardonic.

It was a poor, it was a terrible, this is the critical reception. They're being critical and they're saying it's sardonic and it seems with disdain. One can be critical while still giving it a good criticism and a good review. Can what not? Listen dude, do I come to where, do I come to where Hugh Talk and tell you about Trouser Press? Who is Hugh Talk? That was the band Eddie Reader was in before. Oh, I'm sorry. It was Hugh K. Talk. Hugh K. Talk? H-U-G-H-K-A-Y-T-O-K.

Sir, I want to know what this lady next to me is looking at on her phone. Madam, is there something you'd like to share with the rest of the TED Talk? What is that? It's a cartoon of something? It's a cartoon of something. It's a cartoon. It's a pile of gibbets. This lady is looking at gibbets while you're giving a Ted Talk.

How does that make you feel? This is enraging. And I'm leaving. They'll kill you and your family. Ted can shoot me in the fucking face. I don't care. This is so disrespectful. I can't even imagine why I agreed to do this I pay attention for a long time but a subject you're not interested in it. Um, good stuff! That was fun. Uh huh, uh huh. Paul, get over it.

I'll give you some gibbits. Gib? I'm good, thank you. You're good on the gibbits front? Yeah, I'm all set. Well, especially with crocs. You're all set! Doesn't give us more crocs.

They didn't send us any gibbits, I'll say. No, they didn't. They sure didn't. Maybe they, maybe someone was talking to them and they weren't looking them up online fast enough. You need to stop! Lauren is red-faced. You need to stop!

You need to stop! You need to stop! You need to stop! You need to stop! You need to stop! You need to stop! You need to stop! You need to stop! No, they didn't I sure didn't maybe they maybe someone was talking to them and they weren't looking them up online fast enough Lauren is red-faced and embarrassed. No, I'm not Paul is she sure yes for real They want to say I wouldn't say furious furious is Hurt I feel my feelings my feelings are it's tall. I'm really mad. And Lauren is embarrassed. Paul's hurt. I feel bad. Yes, my feelings are hurt. It's true.

Paul, I'm really sorry I hurt your feelings. I was just a little bit thinking about gibbits and I thought I could get away with it. Good excuse. That's a beautiful apology. One that I have no choice but to accept. More excuses should be like that. I thought I could get away with it.

Yeah. I did. Well guys. I wouldn't have done that if I thought you'd notice. I wish we had promoted our show, Paul, in the last episode, but I guess people could still get it, right? I mean, maybe it won't even happen. What? Cause you're mad at me? He's that mad? Oh my.

No, no, no. Did you want me to hear about this song that you memorized a fact about and you're mad I didn't listen? It wasn't your personal story.'t listen it wasn't your personal story No, it wasn't my personal story, but I fucking be oh I can't believe I have to explain it I'm not happy I did that You're not happy you got caught well, I'm definitely not happy about that. I could have waited five more minutes and I didn't You could have waited one more minutes and I didn't. Ah. You could have waited one more minute. I'm sorry.

Please forgive me. I forgive you. Look, I'm the middle child of freedom and I understand. This is just the way it goes. It's just the way it goes. It's not the way it goes. That's just the way it goes. Is Lauren the oldest? Meaning of our relationship. I'm the big sister. No, I'm the baby. I think you're the big no

I think Scott's the baby. I'm the baby. It's a little rascal. Yeah Paul you're the you're the one telling us we need to buy stuff for wives on Valentine's Day. I'm trying to boss you around Not gonna work Paul I'm really sorry. I feel really bad. I'm going to apologize too much now. It's okay. I just had to give you a hard time about it. Yeah, you did. And I felt it and I won't do it again. And you smelt it. And I can't wait to do our show.

I'm looking forward to it so much. And it will be archived. So as you're hearing this, you can look it up online. DinositeTypewriter.com. You can find all of our past improv shows. This one of course is special. I think it's going to be very interesting because we're going to be in person with no one in the audience, Scott. Do you know that? We're going to be on stage and there'll be no one there. It'll be weird. Kind of can't wait. I think it's going to be very exciting. It's because no one wants to go, right?

Yeah. We tried to sell tickets and no one bought any. It's mortifying. And then the theater was like, we're giving up. We'll just live stream it. We'll live stream you guys people will watch you on their computers eh? and then that was a lie too. Well it sounds fun I'm gonna I'm gonna what am I lying for? You're gonna be on your fancy wine trip. Like for one second I was like is he really gonna say he's gonna watch the show? He never would. He never would. Alright right, guys, we did it again. No, and that hurts me, and that hurts Paul, Scott. And now you need to apologize. Don't turn you actually doing something wrong.

Now I have to apologize. You know what? You need to apologize. Scott, Scott not being interested in anything that we do is not, it doesn't hurt me anymore. Come on. My heart doesn't count. My heart doesn't hurt me anymore. Come on. Anymore. It's just my heart is a cowl. I just. My heart is a cowl is any baby foot.

I, I, I top out at having to listen to comedy stuff at a certain point. Yeah. I understand. After you get the famous people that you suck up to. Sure. And then no room for fame. I'm getting no famous people on my show anymore. They're all doing Conan instead.

What do you get? I, well, there you go. You know how many times I say like, Hey, can we get this person on the show? And they go, no, he's too busy. And then I see he's on Conan the very next day. Come on. I'm sorry.

And the guest is on Conan the very next day. You guys do apologize to me. I don't think so. I think I wanna just say one more time that I just wish I hadn't shown you the gibbets because I feel like that really showed how much I... I think I feel like the it was so what an embarrassing thing that you were looking at. That's why it was funny. And that picture was mortifying. Yeah, they're really girly.

It was like Hello Kitty gibb. Get some adult gibets. It's it's it's it's a hot tip, actually, on Amazon. He had a bag of 100 gibets for $15. A hundred. Why don't I just throw $15 in the trash trash? Yeah, you could do that. Why don't you go right every every 60 seconds I've been doing. They should mail those right to a landfill.

I have every 60 seconds I've been doing. They should mail those right to a landfill. Well, look, guys, they're so small. They won't make a difference. I I had fun on this show, Lauren. I'm going to deflect your trying to make me culpable in any of your blame here. And I'm not going to accept any of that. But I had fun on the show with both of you.

I had a great time. And Paul, I meant every other time when I was listening to every word you said, it's cause I cared so much. And just in the three chair, I waned, you know, when I got weak. I hear you. And I apologize. And I would never do that.

I will never do that again. Look, the siren song, I know that's not true, but the siren song of our phones is very loud. I understand. I should have it across the siren song of our phones is very loud. I understand But what I can say is is if you guys want to subscribe to this show Please do and if you want to listen to ad free Versions of every episode you can go to stitcher premium or you can go to CBB world.com or just stay right here Yeah, do whatever you right here. Yeah.

Do whatever you freaking want. Yeah, you wanna hear no ads? Just listen to this episode. You're all, you're already there. All right, everybody, we love you. FreedomUSA at gmail.com if you wanna send us some three-tures. FreedomUSA on Twitter and Instagram. And check out what's going on everywhere around you.

Move closer to your world, my friend. Take a little bit of time. Move closer to your world, my friend, and you'll see. Bye. What song were you singing earlier? Bye. Flowers. Pick up some flowers.

All right, we'll see you next time. Bye. Bye. This message is sponsored by Cologuard. Because of my own health journey, increasing awareness around the importance of colon cancer screening is a mission close to my heart. And one common misconception about screening for colon cancer is that you should start at age 50. But in actuality, if you're at average risk, the recommended age to start screening is 45. And a great use at home option to screen for colon cancer is with the Coligar

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Hi, everyone. patients. The colic our test is available by prescription only. Hi everyone, Gloria Riviera here and we are back for another season of No One Is Coming to Save Us, a podcast about America's child care crisis. This season we're delving deep into five critical issues facing our country through the lens of child care, poverty, mental health, housing, climate change, and the public school system. By exploring these connections, we aim to highlight that child care is not an isolated issue, but one that influences all facets of American life. Season four of No One Is Coming to Save Us is out now wherever you get your podcasts.