Threedom - Threevisiting: Scales.Oops

Episode Date: April 14, 2026

Threevisiting on the Tues: Lauren, Paul and Scott talk about And Just Like That, not knowing what to do, and 2 surprises.  Send Threetures and emails to [e-mail] us a voicemail asking us a question at hagclaims8.comFollow us on Instagram @ThreedomUSA.Unlock every episode of THREEDOM and THREEMIUM, ad-free, on cbbworld.comGrab some new Threedom merch at cbbworld.com/merchSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hi, it's Julia Louis Dreyfus here, and I can't wait for you to hear our new episode of Wiser Than Me with Cindy Lopper on Amazon Music. Cindy may be a girl who just wants to have fun, but for 40 years she has brought playfulness and a dash of punk to some serious activism. We talk about her lifelong LGBTQ plus advocacy, her astonishing music career, and pick up a whole lot of wisdom along the way. Listen now only on Amazon Music. included with Prime. Freedom is the name of the game. If you miss, you must have a word to say. What?

I don't know. Some childhood playground games I'm recalling. Avocado, anybody? Shiby, chibi, co-pop. Shibby, shibby. Oh, brought to you by Tom Hanks' son at Summer Camp. That's right. That's right.

Apparently it's Colin. Apparently it's Colin. Based on the age. Pronounce colon. Okay. Oh, I always wondered. No. People have been saying it wrong for years.

It's Colin Hanks. What about Colin, pal? Like, here's a guy who, everyone, he could just say like, oh, it's pronounced Colin, but instead he's like, oh, no. In fact, he should. Yes, it's, hey, pronounce it colon, please, that thing that's connected to the shit. Was he waiting for his parents to die before he could say, oh, it's Colin. Mommy Colin.

The thing that's connected to the shit bone. What is avocado, though? It's some game for, I remember from when I was little, it was like, avocado is the name of the game. If you miss, you must have a word to say. And it's like, then you say. like avocado something something and you have to have a word everybody says avocado something on the clapping let's say let's try it avocado okay then you say carrot oh i don't know it's probably some bullshit game like we play we almost played it i think that was real close well it came really close

but it was scary because we didn't know how but yeah that's never stopped us before that's true i can look it up you're right uh avocado game see if it's and then something avocado game and then something Avocado game Fart 3,000? That's it. The avocado game by Jean Lacallar. Can you look up avocado hand clapping game? Okay, because there is an exploding. I don't think I ever knew how to play it.

Look up avocado handcloppy game Lauren Lapkis. Yeah, that'll get you there. Avocado hand clapping game. Lauren Lackis' childhood. Lauren Lepkis memories. Yeah. I can just access your memories. Imagine if we could do that.

That's like in the next Michelle Gondry film. Here's, I forgive me. This is going to come out of nowhere. Paul, I don't forgive you. I think, well, wait, do you what I've said. I think there should be a domain, an internet domain, that's dot oops. Oh. Okay, and why?

What happens to? For like mistakes when you accidentally go to a different website? Just because it's funny. Just as hey, you can find me at all of Tompkins. No, you know, you probably can, like Arden's website for her podcast is at like dot vodka. Oh. Will you accept the service? Oh, yeah, because the real domain is probably dot vodka.com, but they, but you can get to it by just going.

So you could do dot oops. Yeah, we could do it. Let's do dot oops. FreedomUSA. Dot oops. And our website is what? I don't think we have one. And our website is what?

By the way, Paul. And what are we trying to put on there? Paul, I forgive you, but I never forget. Wow. Well, thanks. I don't want to be forgotten. I'll remember you in this thing that you said always. I'm too sweet to be forgotten.

That's so, that's a great math problem. Too sweet. Okay, here's an avocado clapping game video. I'm not going to have a child explain this to me. She's with her mother. Does that mitigate it? They forgot the O. Okay, so it's if you miss the hand clap, you have to say a word.

And that's you changing your name. W, X, one, Z, A, B, stop. So she messed up. Since she messed up. These two love each other. Aw. her two name options and we're just going to figure out. She sounds so cute.

Is she cute? She's very cute and her mom is just lovingly looking at her. Like this is the best thing that. To show you, you just do this. Okay, I got no sense of how you play this from your instructions. I got something. I will definitely remember half of that for the next time I bring this up.

It's a specific type of hand clapping, right? Yes, it's like bump, bump, bump. So then if you miss it. Oh, that kind of shit. But you're saying A, B, C, D. So if you miss it, you have to say, So then what did it happen? So she missed on C?

She missed on like Y or something like that. I don't know. Oh, fuck. Carrot. Carrot, of course. And Cendiary? Carrie, put on the big. This is a sexy thing.

This is Johnny Mitchell. But who is watching it just like that? Janie and I are watching it and we started a recap podcast. You did? Wait, wait, wait. How did I miss this? Is it on your feed? It's in her substact.

It's behind the paywall. Oh, I'll pay for this shit. We might be able to help you. Okay, great. I don't want to pay. But I'm really excited. Wait, that's so amazing. It's wild.

The first two, okay, so they dropped two. So the new model is drop two, drop one, one, one, one, one. Yeah. Two, okay, let me see if I can get this. Two, one, one, one, one, one. It's very simple. Drop two, then, one, one, one, one. And the two. Anyone can do this.

The first one ended, I didn't remember. And you can do it. I didn't remember. You can do it. I didn't remember that the first, the first night. would be two. And so it ended it. I was like, man, I wish I could binge it. And then the next one came up and I want to, oh, fuck you. And then after that, they had the trailer for the rest of the season and I saw Aiden and I cried. Sure. I even knew he was already coming.

What's Aiden? Aiden is her. What's Aiden? The one that got away. So I'm pretty excited. And the first, they're getting really sexual in these first episodes. It's too much. It's so Horntown. Miranda's fully nude multiple times. Miranda? Cynthia Nixon. Did she ask for this? She's like, I'm never going to be governor.

Well, I do listen. Oh, my God. That's fucking hilarious. Let me show my Google. I don't care anymore. That's really funny. I do listen to the companion podcast from the writers. Oh, sure.

Which I really enjoy. Yeah, it's all the friends holding hands. Doctor Who's companions. And what if the sex in the city girls all had to have a companion on the show? Well, it's very good. A sober companion. The women. I'm sorry.

Sober companion, my pilot, that didn't. go last year. Oh, I'm so sorry. It was triggering that you brought up that phrase. We were there with you when you heard it. Yeah, it was disappointing. It was a bad day. It was disappointing, but it was okay. I remember we were holding your hands. Yeah, and I was weeping. Yes. And we said, why don't you get into the pool and then no one can tell you're crying. Yeah. And we were at Earwolf, so it was weird, but I did get into the pool. You got into the Earwool pool. I went into the earwool pool, which is always full of podcasters with their electrical equipment. It's very dangerous.

But the podcast, Michael Patrick King talks about asking Cynthia Nixon to do that fully nude scene because there's a... Did you get down on one knee? Yeah. Will you, please? He held a rose. Be nude. It was a funny scene, though. It wasn't a sex scene when she's fully naked.

She's in a sensory deprivation tank and then you see her full bawd. And it was something that happened to him getting the saline in his eye. Right. And then he asked her, would you be fully naked for this? Because it's funnier if you're fully naked. And she was down. And then they were like, you know, that's 25 years of trust from working together for so long. I was like, I get that.

I thought that was good. And it was funnier that she was naked. If she was in her bikini or something, it wouldn't have been as fun. It was funnier, but not that funny to me. It's not necessary. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, it's not necessary. It was because it was not a plot point.

No, it was just a diversion scene. Although Jane and I talked about this, she's getting to be funny so far in this season in a way that she was not allowed to be. Because it wasn't last season. I don't know that much about it, but it wasn't last season. drag or something where... Well, I loved it, but it was like she's going through her divorce and all this stuff. And so it's like very...

She doesn't have as much fun. This is a more fun lighthearted season for her. We did talk about how the... There were things in the previously on that absolutely did not matter. I didn't remember any of it, by the way. I was shocked. And then there were things in the episode that was like, oh, right. She was an alcoholic.

Like that they did not mention... Why didn't they put them in the recap? Yes, exactly. They kept talking about the Met Ball and making you think like, okay, this episode is going to start right at the moment. Yeah. Wow. No, you're thinking of the Met Gallo. Oh, oh.

Yeah. Are those two different things? Well, no, the Met ball. Are the Mets in charge of one of these? I think it's the same thing, but I think what they, what it was was that they only went to the party portion. They didn't go on the red carpet. Oh, is the gala. Is that the distinction?

I think that was. The gala includes the carpet and the party? I just don't know. I just, I think it's called the Met Ball or the Met Gala. I've never heard Metball in my life. Maybe they can't say Matt Gail. That's what we were wondering. Oh, yeah.

It's like when you talk about the Super Bowl, it's like the big game coming up. You can't say that? You can't say the Super Bowl. That's crazy. It's just a thing in the world. Unless you have a deal with them where you're the official chip or whatever of it, you have to be like, hey, you're ready for the big game on Sunday? I'm sorry, that's bizarre. Because I think Super Bowl is just a word.

It transcends, like, yeah. We're going to watch the ultimate football championship. It's not a brand. It's like Mickey Mouse. Yeah. Can you say Mickey Mouse? I don't know, but, like, especially because Mickey Mouse now describes something of like, oh, boy, that's really Mickey Mouse, you know?

Right. Is he in the public domain now? No, Disney keeps, like, getting extended. But why is Mickey Mouse the word for things that are kind of janky? I don't get that because I'm like, actually, Mickey Mouse is perfect. He early on. He's the perfect male specimen. He's the big ears.

He may not like it, but this is what peak male is. Big ears shirtless. Yeah. Buttons on his shorts. He has a shirt. White Caucasian flesh-colored face. The rest of your body is black. Sort of vitilago.

Like he-h. I think. Um, I, is it that in the early cartoons, he was bad at building things? Was that part of his thing? He just started slapping hammers and nails on the stuff. I kind of can picture that.

He's become so not funny. Was he? He used to be hilarious. Well, no, he's more of a straight man. He's kind of like the every man. He's kind of the Charlie Brown. He's kind of like, he's just, Like things are happening to him and around him.

Well, he's also like, now he has to be so well-meaning and like on the kid's side about everything. It's like, oh, no, let me help you. You know, it's like, somehow, kids side. Well, you know, like, if you go disagreements. When you see like, Fantasmic or whatever it is. Fantasin, yeah. Mickey Mouse is Fantasm. Oh, my God.

I love that. I don't know what that is. Just fucking balls with spikes coming towards his ears. Yeah, Fantasim was a horror movie from the early 80s, right? I remember seeing commercials when I was a kid and it was terrifying. Oh, that's funny. It's really good. Is it good?

Oh, yeah. It's great. So if it was Mickey Mouse, they'd be like the spiky balls would have ears. Floating spiking ball. Yeah, yeah, with like hidden mickeys. Yeah, that slash everybody. Hidden Mickey. Hidden Mickey.

I love to find a hidden Mickey. Hidden Mickey. Hit in Mickey. Jamel Malay. You almost got it. Holly knows who Mickey Mouse is now. She says, oh, thank God. She says, mouse.

I've been emailing her. He refuses to call him by his first name. Yeah. He's a last name basis. Why would she know, like, what is she seen? She's into a couple Disney movies, but then I guess Mike showed her Steamboat Willie. Sure. Oh.

And then now that plays. He showed her his Steamboat Willie. No, no, no. Don't be fucking disgusting. And it played, that little clip plays at the beginning of Disney movies. Right. Every movie. Yeah.

And so she knows that. And waiting on his little ass and whistling. And she has a couple of Disney movies. She likes. Monsters Inc., Monsters University, and Coco. Monster's incredible. Coco's so good. That's what Ink stands for, right?

Yeah. She likes those three. We've been watching Monsters University like in pieces a lot. I'm very familiar with that film now. I love that show, but it makes me cry. Yeah. Monsters University.

Monsters. University. In pieces. I haven't seen it. You got to come on Scott. I'm not going to do that show. But anyway, she says mouse. And I'm very excited because we're going to go to Disneyland soon.

Oh, really? And this is her only work. Is that correct? It's all she's got. No, she's got many words and they're really, really. Mary babysat her last night and had to like decipher a lot of her words. And it was so funny to hear her language from Mary. Like she was like, she was like, gagu, gagu.

And I was like, oh, I was dying. That means grogu, the child. She wanted to be covered in pillows. It was like a whole thing. Wait, gagoo means cover me in pillows? Like cover. Like it was like cover. Like they were in.

Gagoo. Mary, uh, gagu. Because then like she's like, She's so adamant. She's like, Gagoo, Gagoo, Gagher. Would Mary cover me in pillows if I asked her? Probably for our $500 or more. Or more?

I'll just, I'll take the 500. Mary has a very particular set of skills. I'll cover you in pillows, but it's going to cost you $500. So did Holly have to demonstrate Gagu? She pulled her arm. She eventually pulled Mary's arm to like get her to understand. And then she did. This is my dream.

Yeah, yeah. I mean, if you ever want to babysit, It's available to you. I might want to do it. She won't like me. Well, she probably would. But she was, well, I went to a... What if I say gagu to her?

Yeah, and then she covers the one. She'd be like, this guy gets it. Yeah. And then I suffocate. Yeah. They had a fun time. Did you hear how Paul died? A baby covered him.

Sufficated. They laughed on the news. He had all the power to get out. The only time they've ever laughed on the news. He let it. happen. They didn't even apologize for laughing. But yeah, no, I had the premiere last night for the

Outlaws. I was telling us the new Netflix film coming out July 7th. And so Mary Beauty said. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, but it was, it was so cute. She fed her dinner and they had what did she eat now. Last night she had Annie's Mac and Cheese and who's? Who's? Annie's brand.

Oh, it's a brand. Who's that? And like 1,000. strawberries. Mary texted me and said, is there a thing as too many strawberries? And I said, nope. She almost ate the whole box. I was just like, if she's eating something with you, I'm thrilled. And that's all I can do. So. And he will eat anything. Did Mary read her a story? She read her a few stories. And then when it was time for bed, Holly got very upset. And then she started screaming. Yeah. And then Mary picked her off and was taking her and she was really

upset and then she was like, what do you need? And she like pointed dramatically at her milk bottle that was left in the big bed, which is our bed. And Mary was like, oh, you need your milk. And then she was like, yeah. She was fine. And then she went to bed. Yeah. She takes her milk to bed with her? She sometimes does. I wish. Now. It sounds like a luxury. Sometimes, yes. Bed milk. Oh, I love my bed milk. It was literally, as of the last couple weeks, I just allowed it. And then it kind of, Yeah. Interesting. She'll finish it and then fall asleep.

Huh. I love it. Yeah. Love it. Yeah. It's great. It's great. I'm going to start drinking out of a baby bottle again.

You know what? That'd be so cute. It wouldn't be weird at all. Actually, for my brother's baby shower, like for my brother's wife's baby shower years ago. Brothers wife's baby shower. Well, it's his and hers,

but I ran some games for it. Yes, of course. You got to run the race. And one of them was to drink out of a bottle as fast as you can. And I remember my dad and brother having to do it. And it was like, is it really hard? because it doesn't come out quickly.

Right. And so it was like kind of like they're both like getting headaches. I was like this is like an insane game. Oh, no babies do it. So they're trying to chug. It was a psychotic game and it was really funny. Does that mean that babies are just like taking their time when they're drinking out of a bottle? I mean, that's a problem with Emmy is she always wants to gulp everything.

So like with her water bottle. Do you take a slower nipple? No, now she's okay with the milk. But it's especially with her water. There's like different hole sizes basically. Wow. Yeah. We had to expand it.

When she's really young, it's really tiny. And then, you know, but there was a time when she was like gulping down 11 ounces with just like in three minutes. You know, just like, bop, goop, nope. But now with the water. But then when she throw up? No. Oh, that's good. No, she just loves to eat.

But, you know, now with the water, it's like. She loves to eat. She loves it. She loves water. She loves water. And she'll just like. suck so much through the straw that it just like dribbles down the front of her. It's so cute.

What is wrong with her? I don't know. I've been wondering. That's so weird. You should take her to a scientist. I'm hoping that her first words are what's wrong with her. Yeah. You want her first words to you?

What's wrong with her? Yeah. Because I keep saying, what's wrong with you? What's wrong with you? Yeah. I would love her just to answer me. No, I think a scientist would be interested in her like E.T.

You know? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Kind of like what's up. Like, let's see what happens when you get cold. Why don't you put some gray makeup on her or put her in a ditch? And then see if a scientist comes along. Oh, there's more. Sure. Scientists love a little gray thing in a ditch. Yeah, that's the thing about scientists.

They intentionally live far away from the lab so they can commute and pass by ditches. Yeah, yeah, yeah. In case there are ever any little gray areas. Well, when they're on their bikes. Some of their podcasts. They ride bikes. All scientists ride bikes. Scientists love bike rides.

They think it's the best way to get to work. Rain or shine. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, sleep. They're like mailmen. No, sleep. Yeah. Hail.

Hale. What we have? We have slow. Slow? Slow. Sneat. Hail. We got scale.

Hile. Oops. Dot oops. Scale. Scale. Scale. Scale. We should get scale.oops.

That's our whips. And sell freedom scales. When is this episode? Yeah. It's like the scales of justice. Dropping. To be honest, I don't know. But I mean, I think right before your movie maybe, but.

In July. Yeah. I want to ask what you're doing for the fourth. Oh. No, don't have any plans. Great. Zero. I'll be hanging out as well.

Not here. Should we throw some fireworks in that car? I'm unavailable. No, I'm going to be in a different place. Where are you going to be, girl? You're going to a second location? I'm going to a second location. On the 4th of July, I'll be in Michigan City, Indiana.

Whoa. Yes, it sounds random because it is. I'm going to Chicago for a while. Chicago. Just for like around that time. But then my brother and my sister-in-law and I and our kids and Mike, we're all going to go to an Airbnb on the beach. Talk louder.

Oh, nice. Nice, nice, nice. So I'm excited. We've never done that as a unit. Indiana, you said? Yeah, Michigan City, Indiana. It's on the lake. Lake Michigan.

I never think of that. Well, yeah, just like Chicago is. So it loops underneath and around up to Michigan, you know. But it is one of the great lakes. It is a great lake. And I'm excited to have some time, some QT. My favorite lake is Lake Michigan because it's the one that I really know. How about you?

Elsinore. Okay. Interesting. Mine's Ness. And so you're really doing nothing for the fourth? We don't have any plans. We haven't discussed it. Do you usually do something?

We're not talking to each other. Okay. Right now you're just waiting to see. We could do a backyard screening. We could do a backyard screen. That would be fun. Yeah. Let me bring that up.

What movie would you watch? I don't know something just something dumb Born on the 4th of July We tried to We tried to Fun Fun to watch it

Under the Stars Yeah We didn't we try to watch The Green Night One night And then afterwards We saw the Green Night We're like

That would have been terrible For a backyard screening Because it's so like Quiet and Somber There was something There was something wrong

With the projector Basically what happened Was my garage Where I keep the projector There's an incline To get to it And I just let go of the cart and it traveled all the way down and crashed into our gate. Oh my god. And the projector

was fucked up and these guys came over and we were like, well, we can't do this. But did it look cool? Yeah. It did. I mean, I ran after. I ran after it and almost, it was like one of those things where it was like in slow motion. I almost got it, but missed it. But yeah, that would be, that would be fun. The Green Night is a movie that I saw on the big screen, really enjoyed it. And then I've not thought this many times. but I thought, I wish I'd been high watching this. The Green Night? I don't think I know what that is. Oh, man. It kind of came and went, although it was a... It was a talk about a lot?

Yeah. No, no. Oh, what is it? It's like set back in, you know... Green Night Days. Yeah. So like medieval times? Yes. Yeah.

And Dev Patel is in it. Is it actually? Yeah. Oh, I'm just guessing. He's great. It's a beautiful... It's beautifully shot. Why do I feel like he doesn't get his flowers?

Yeah, I know. He's so good in everything he does. He's like a... It's weird when a famous person is underrated. Yeah, he actually is. Yeah, he's great. He always is in good films. I only think about him twice a week.

He's in good films where he's fantastic. Every time. I'm always thinking about him. Yes. But it's like you do guys. I just picture he doesn't. He doesn't misstep. Yeah.

And I think we take that for granted. I think so too. Although the newsroom. Okay. I've never really watched that. Don't ever. Okay. So was he on that?

Yeah. Yeah. He was. It was really weird. That was when I got all the hot actors of that year. and put them on that and everyone was like, ooh, boy, this just sucks. Sorry, Allison, Bill.

Well, I'm catching up on Succession Season 3. Oh, great. That's how behind I am. And guess what, it's really good. Does this ring any bells? Don ding. D-de-de-de-de-de-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-bong. All right, we have to take a break.

I don't know about you, Paul. Well, what would you like to know? Okay, well, let me tell you something about myself, and I'll see if you relate. Okay. I like... I like things too. I... What's that song?

I like... I can't remember any example, but it's permeated through my brain. I love you too. Anyway, I like keeping my money where I can see it. But I don't like big wireless carriers. Oh yeah, I know this. Yeah. So after years of overpaying, dealing with bogus fees and these quote unquote free perks that actually cost

more. I finally just, I gave up, not on life. I gave up and I switched to Mint Mobile. I was so glad because I was watching and doing all those things and it was tearing my heart out. Yeah. It looked so stupid. Min Mobile offers premium wireless plans starting at just $15 a month. All plans come with high speed data, unlimited talk and text, and they're delivered on the nation's largest 5G network. You can bring your own phone and number, activate with ESIM in minutes, and start saving immediately. No, long-term contracts and Scott, I don't going to live this. I hate hassles, is it about

those? No hassle. Oh, hell yeah. Yeah. I am so happy that I switched to Mitt Mobile. The service is fast, it's reliable, and guess what? With all that money that I have in my bank account, I've started

betting Polly Market, and I'm now a trillionaire. Oh, okay. You know what? I was worried. I feel great for you. Yeah. So anyway, it's, it's, I'm I'm saving so much. If you like your money, like Scott does, MintMobile is for you. Shop plans at mintmobile.com slash freedom.

That's mintmobile.com slash freedom. Upfront payment of $45 for three-month five-gigabyte plan required, equivalent to $15 a month. New customer offer for first three months only, then full-price plan options available. Taxes and fees extra see MintMobile for details. You know, this time of year, it always makes me rethink what is in my closet.

Oh. You know what I mean? This time of year makes me think about weird bugs. Yeah, I know. No, yeah. That's usually what's in my closet. Oh. Yeah. So, I mean, yeah, we're very, very similar.

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You know why that is? Why? What's up? Well, Quince makes high quality everyday essentials using premium materials like 100% European linen and their insanely soft, flow-knit activeware fabric. I'm glad you mentioned linen because this is something I like to talk about all the time. Their men's linen pants and shirts are lightweight, breathable, and comfortable. The perfect layer for spring.

The pants strike the right balance between laid back and refined. So you look put together without even trying. Yeah. Quince works directly with ethical factories and cuts out the middlemen. I hate middlemen. We're dismissive. So you're paying for quality, not brand. and markup, everything is designed to last and make getting dressed easy.

You know what? We have a lot of stuff from Quince here at my house. In fact, the three of us. Well, we do. Combines. Yes, we wear the, we try to wear one community outfit every day. I just got a great duffel, like a sort of to go bag on your, when you're traveling and put it on top of your suitcase.

Yes, we got, we actually got clothes for our daughter, and she loves the dress that she's worn it now two days out of the last three. We washed it in between, trust me. We're constantly doing laundry. But she loves this particular dress at Quince. And I was like, wow, where'd she get this dress? I looked in the back and I should have known. There's that tag. I should have a lovely zip up cardigan, cashmere, if you please. And it's a beautiful blue color. I couldn't be happier with it. Well, we want to implore you out there. Refresh your wardrobe with Quince. Go to quince.com slash freedom for free shipping and 365 day returns. Now available, by the way, in Canada, too.

Go to Q-U-I-N-C-E.com slash freedom for free shipping and 365-day returns. Quince.com slash freedom! Do you ever find yourself scrolling through headlines, especially health headlines, and just thinking that can't be true? Well, I certainly do. 2025 brought us some ridiculous far-fetched health claims and some especially terrifying changes in public health. What's in store for us in 26? I'm Chelsea Clinton, and we're back with season two of my podcast. That Can't Be True.

Follow along and catch up on season one wherever you get your podcasts. And we're back. And, okay, so I had something happened to me the other day. Again, this is not a story. Good or bad? Neutral? Bad? I mean, bad for everyone involved.

What? Okay. Something bad for everyone involved happened? Includging you? Well, Including or? Let me just tell the story. And you can decide what I should have done.

With hurling. Okay, so this is kind of a, what would, moral quandary? What would you do? What would you do? Is that, is that the theme to what would you do? That's a theme from, what would you do? The news program?

90s show hosted by Mark Summers. Oh. But the news program, don't you love that when John Quinois is like, what would you do? What would you do? If you saw this bitch screaming in the street. There is a phrase that he said that the phrase that pays. It's just in my brain forever where he's, you know,

they're going through the scenario and they show one person after another doing whatever. And then he goes, look at this guy. Wow. Look at this guy. Oh, my God. I love how he talks. looks like this. Look at this guy.

What would you do? I want to hear we're going to say, but we also haven't talked about the curious case of Natalia Grace on each other than X-Ga-Mas. Fantastic. That's true. We haven't talked about that. It's a really good show.

I've never even heard of it. Well, it feels like the kind of thing John Quinoos would host. What? It's a doc. I only thought that he would host one show, which is what would you do? If you see the show, you get it.

Who's the guy with the white hair who's like. Keith Morrison. Yeah. And we didn't know if this was a child or an adult. But was this orphan? all that she's seen. Yeah. We needed that on the dockey series.

What would you do? I think I saw him on a plane once. No. You think you saw him? That's incredible. You think you saw him on a plane? Yeah. And people are coming up to him going,

I love your show. People were coming up. I love your Spro. I follow this like blog that I followed for like 20 years probably. A web blog? Yeah. And I followed it for like 15 years. And this, I really enjoy it.

But there was a, they now sent an email in the email title. And some people out there might know, what I'm talking about. I'm not going to name it, because I am a fan, but the email subject line was was, I got like, celebrity gossip. And I was like, oh, celebrity gossip. And I opened it up, and it was that her friend saw the priest from, from Fleabaget on a plane. I was like, that's not gossip. I want, that's a sighting. I want things about him. Did he famously say, I will never fly on a plane? Yeah. I just was like, don't call it that if it's not that. I got my hopes up. Okay, so what

happened to you that was bad? All right. So I'm at a wedding. Oh, no. A friend's wedding. Oh, God. Lots of spieple. Lots of s' people. Very fun. Lots of skeet. I mean, sleet. I beg your pardon.

I meant sneat. Very fun. And it's getting laid into the celebration. That's part where you have to dance now. The regular crowd shuffle is in. Before the dancing. Okay. They cut the cake.

Slice. Slice. Slice. Slice. Exactly. Yeah. 55 pieces. 55.

55. 155. Pets. I've finally seen it. Yay. Yay. I actually was so impressed by that woman saying all that stuff. That's hard to say without tripping over yourself.

Yeah. So the cake gets cut and I go over and I grab a piece of cake and it looks really. The bridegroom's still standing there. The knife still in their head. He was actually putting the piece towards her mouth and Scott goes out. He puts his bread. Everyone's got their cake. Everything's cool.

What flavor? It was some sort of chocolate. Wedding. Yeah, wedding. No, you don't see chocolate every day at a wedding, and I love chocolate cake. Too true. I love chocolate cake. I didn't even have chocolate at my own wedding.

Why? Why? Why? Why? So I grab the piece of cake, and I come over to where everyone's kind of congregating, and I take my fork. I take my fork, or I cut a piece, a forkful. Yeah. And I'm lifting it to my mouth.

Oh, now. Is there a worm on it? No. Okay. Half a worm? Of course. order form. So I'm lifting it up to my mouth and suddenly someone, someone's mother from the wedding party takes us a stumble. Oh no. A nasty fall and falls like right in, not right in front of me.

I really don't like when people fall. Yeah. I hate it. It's, it's, I think, I think about falling all the time. Yeah. Yeah. It's like I was reading some press about Tom Sagarra's new special and I guess his wife like fell downstairs and it's it's one of my big pet peeves when people fall down the stairs yeah it's like we're having fun here why did you do that so this this older woman falls not in not directly in front of me there still is like a group of people around me who can help her your aunt around better than me so you're having a larry david moment of like do i eat the cake i literally am like i'm look i'm gonna look like an asshole if i eat this bite so i put the fork sorted down.

And I, but then I'm like, I can't walk away to eat it because then I look like I don't care about the situation. So I'm just sitting here like moving back and forth going how soon is too soon to take this delicious bite. Moving back and forth. So that's the bad thing that happened to everyone was that you didn't know if you could bite it because. And I stand there like a Pirates of the Caribbean animatronic.

Yes, it's just kind of going back and forth. Like I'm going moving closer going, no, no, I can't. I put it back. And then, and then I'm like. I really want this piece. Why should I eat the cake? Finally, about five minutes. She falls out.

There's nothing I can do. When everything looked okay. I'm not going to waste the cake? I walked away and I finally had that piece of cake. And is it so good. And then is she okay? I think so. Did anyone notice you?

No, I don't think anyone was trained on me because this terrible thing was happening, but I just felt very self-conscious. It would be so great if there's a wedding video where she falls. Everybody was like, oh my God. And then there's you like, oh. No, it's actually. I did not want to happen. It's actually his hand going up down, up down.

He's like, is this weird? Is this weird? Oh my God. I felt so self-conscious. But now with camera phones, that stuff can happen. You don't want to happen to you. Absolutely. Wow.

Apparently also at the wedding, I left before this drama, but apparently a neighbor, because it was at a house that has public events, but that had, you know, residential neighbors. Right. Apparently, a neighbor got so upset at the noise that you start bumrushing everyone and got pepper sprayed by security. What? People are actually out of their minds.

People are out of their minds these days. I do worry about that. Yeah. I don't worry about it. I feel like it'll sort itself out. Okay. People being insane right now? No mental health help in the world.

It balances out. Okay. Speaking of almost putting a forkful of something in your mouth. One time, Janie and I were out to dinner. we were headed to dinner we ran into somebody that we knew he said come have dinner with us we're having a lovely time

and this friend starts telling he told us a story about this guy that he used to work with at a gas station and the guy would bring a briefcase to work every day like he he sort of

he was like a guy who acted as if he had maybe he was in special forces or something like that. Like he acted, he tried to act like a cool, tough macho guy. And then,

uh, one day they opened up his briefcase and there was nothing in it. And so they put, which they figured. Right. You know, whatever was in, it was like inconsequential.

And then they put a, a, is that series? That was Alexa. Someone's Alexa. What? Do you have Alexa? I brought my Alexa with me.

Is that weird? Oh. Oh. Yeah. I brought my Alexa with it. Will you please introduce us? I plugged. in I got it on your Wi-Fi.

I thought in case I wanted to know what the weather was before he left. I wonder why they named her Alexa. Maybe because it's a word that no one ever said with a certain... But Siri is worse because you're always saying I'm sorry and then it turns on. You're always saying you're sorry. I'm constantly apologizing. I'm sorry. So...

I'm Siri Kool-up. I'm Siri. I'm serious. Oh my God. I'm very serious to hear that. Oh, I am. So, um, so. So they put something inside the

They put a dildo in his briefcase. Where did they? What? Where did they? I didn't know. I seem to have a dildo right here behind. I think this prank was planned.

Oh, okay. They were able to access one. Hey, let's put the dildo in there. Let's put the community dildo. He knows it on his desk. What if he found it in his briefcase? That's what the restroom key is attached to. I was thinking on the way here about the phrase.

Oh, I'm sorry. Please go ahead. So we're laughing at the story. and then I ask our friend, well, what happened to the guy after that? And I had a forkful of food and I was bringing it up to my mouth and our friend said, oh, he killed himself.

And I froze. I've never, you're like, you did a freeze take. I did a freeze take where I was like, I literally did not know what to do. It shocked me to my core. And was it true? Yes. Oh my God.

They're fucking, I... Because of the dildo thing? I think because he was... Humiliated. He was humiliated. That's tragic. Yeah. That's not a fun story then.

I just thought you meant like, oh, he was very troubled and years later he did that. He did it because of the dildo thing? I think it was not long after that. I really don't like that. But yeah, you don't know if you're supposed to take a bite. It's not that I was trying to decide what to do. I was incapable of doing it. Did you ever take the bite?

No, it's still there. Oh my God. You still? I love that fork full food. Yes. Look, years old. It's rotting.

Jeez. You brought your Alexa and that? You're a psycho. Hey. Well, you are. Alexa. Am I a psycho? I found this on the web.

You are. You bitch. It is wedding season, though. Isn't it? So true. Oh, but I was going to say, I was thinking on the way here about the phrase. It is wedding season though.

I was, what is it? Like, I was sitting. with my thumb up my ass. Yeah. Like, like, I was thinking it's kind of a funny phrase. Like, if you're, like, I was, I made up a whole, I made up a whole scenario my head on the way here of like, what would be funny. If someone was like, oh, did you go to that birthday party of someone you hate or whatever?

And then like, no, like, what did you do instead? I sat at home with my thumb up my ass. And I was like, that's actually kind of like, it's a really harsh thing to say. Well, it's usually it's directed at other people. It's like, you're just sitting around with your thumb on your ass. Yeah, but I thought it was funny to say about yourself. It's weird to take. That's how much you didn't want to go to the thing.

Where'd you take ownership of it? Instead, I chose to put my thumb up my ass. Like, I so didn't want to go. Another great ass-related phrases, if it was up your ass, you'd know. If it was up your ass, you'd know. If someone's saying, like, where do I leave my keys? If they were up your ass, you'd know. Yeah, yeah, that's so 80s, isn't it?

It feels really 80. What a nice thing to say to a love one. It feels like something that would be a John Hughes movie. I would think it's 99% of the time you say that to someone, it's someone you live with and love. Because otherwise- Yeah, 99%. You live love. love and laugh with them?

Sure. Do you relax? You're at the lake with them? Like, would you be saying that to a coworker? Oh, yeah. Well, if they were up your ass, you'd know. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. In our line of work, I think you can't. Where are those files? If they were up your ass, you'd know. It is. Okay, that's the, if it were up your ass, you'd know challenge. Freedom challenge. Say that to your boss.

Yeah. Today. If only if your boss asks for files. Yes. And only if your boss is cool as hell. Yeah. No. I think, I think anyone.

So you want people to get fired. This is the test to see if the boss is cool as hell. Okay. Fair enough. I think it cannot be about files, too. Like, if you're working at a pizza place and it's like, where's the mozzarella cheese? If it was up your ass, you'd know. I think it has to be.

Imagine being at a pizza place and losing track of the mozzarella cheese. And honestly, if it was up my ass, I don't know if I would know. If the boss. We need to close down. Where is? Where is cheese? This is an emergency. Important ingredients.

Pizza dough. We have tomato sauce. We have. peppers, pepperoni, olives. But we don't have the cheese. No cheese all day. No cheese all day. We went to Lake Arrowhead, as I mentioned recently, and we went to this pizza place,

and then we were waiting. It was going to make a 45-minute wait. Remember you went to Lake Arrowhead? You came back with that Lake Arrowhead accent? I know. Even though you were only there for like a few days. I know. It was so bratty of me.

But then this guy was like, have you been here before? Like this guy waiting in line? To Lake Arrowhead? Well, because he said to us, how long is the wait today? Like, I don't know. I guess there's like a thing there. And then we were like, I heard 45 minutes. He goes, is this your first time here?

And we said, yeah. And he's like, it's the best pizza on the mountain. Are the best pizza on the mountain? I'm like, yeah, the bar is low. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, it's dominoes. I saw one other one.

Like it was good. Yeah. Like I get all my pizza sea level. Yeah. Every individual place on the mountain would have the best of whatever it is. It is. Yeah. Yeah.

It's the best gas on the mountain. The best milk on the mountain. Best lemonade. on the mountain. Yeah. Best, what else you get, tissues?

Best tissues on the mountain. You get, you get a car freshener. You get, um, ah, shit, you get a,

uh, you know, uh, come on. Well, you could put your phone cord in it in the lighter and then you put it in the, in the cigarette lighter.

You put it in the cigarette lighter. It puts it in the cigarette lighter. Oh my God. Oh my God. I saw something. Oh, I went to, um,

I know, thank God, something. I went to, two more minutes. I went to, God. Child's birthday party last weekend.

Were you invited? I was. No, don't tell me you saw aliens like in signs. No, I didn't. Well, my favorite line of... I saw signs in aliens. My favorite... Don't go in here, aliens.

My favorite line of dialogue for the movie signs was when the aliens were on the news. They, you know... They took over for the anchor movies. They were like, well, a little, la, la. The story was being reported on the news, and the anchor said in voiceover, the images were taken by a 40-year-old at a child's birthday party. What?

It was like the clunky. Why would you need to know the person's exact age who took the video? It's also outing someone's age, which is kind of rude. Yeah. Can you imagine you captured the video of the aliens? And you've been telling all of your friends, you're 35? Yeah. A man in his 40s took that of a child's birthday party.

Can you believe he was even there? Should have only been children present. So you went to a child's birthday park? I did. So we were looking for parking. I was at someone's house. And we turned on the street and... Screege.

Yeah, it was like that. And then we drove by this guy and his car... This guy's car was parked and he had his door open and his feet on the ground as if he was maybe going to get out. But he had on only tight boxer briefs. Ouch, out. Okay. And he had a child's, like a little girl's suitcase, like a pink with white polka-dots rolly suitcase. Did he have a dildo inside? I didn't open it.

Did he have shoes on? He did not. And he had, he looked like Buffalo Bill. I was literally like, his hair was a little cray and I was like. The cool Western Buffalo Bill? No. And I was like, did he mention if he'd fuck him? I literally said to him like, what the fuck was that?

He just drove by this guy. Because it's like a suburban area. It was just like really weird. Right. Go into the party and then Spider-Man walks in with a pink suitcase with white. Oh, wow. And he was Spider-Man. He was putting on his costume,

but he was putting it on half a block away in plain sight, apparently, because I saw him in his own-ins. Not in plain sight of the party, but in-line-side of anyone. I mean, like other kids were parking their car, you know. Kids were parking their cars. Other kids were pulling up around the same area. That would be so great to have a child's birthday party a line of big wheels just like coming up.

It was kind of hilarious. And then it's a different kid. Then there was a Batman who came in as well. What? Spider-Man and Batman? Those are two different universes. The kid loves them both. And so the kids were all really excited.

And they were, don't make me choose. They did a good job and they were like doing this little like, just doing games with the little kids. They were like four and under. So they didn't have to do too much. So three, two, one. Yeah.

And Holly was really skeptical of the whole situation. Hey, anybody here into Gabagaw or whatever? cover up so so this guy they have like a little parachute I know it's time to go they have a little parachute and they're having the kids like do

you know like sit in the middle and they're like you know pulled on the parachute make it flap and whatever and this the Batman was like Swedish and so he's like okay where are you a met

I can't do the accent but he's like where do you imagine yourself and he was like doing this sort of game that we were later talking about was like too like advanced advanced he was like where could you be anywhere in the world are you in Paris?

And he's like, are you in Mallorca? Okay, are you in Mallorca? It's like a four-year-old being like, and there's like a parachute flapping all around me. He's like, you're in Mayorka. You could be anywhere in the world. Are you in Maraqa? Do you see it now?

Stop saying, Majorca, Batman. You're in a beautiful beach with a lady who's wearing a string bikini and you're having drinks. It was truly so specific and weird. And I was like... Later you go to the disco and just a cocaine. And the kids were like looking around like, what?

I've never heard Batman talk about myorca in any of his movies. And then we also were like, wait, Spider-Man shouldn't have had a pink dotted suitcase. He should have a black bag, if anything. If anything. And not roly. I would also, a duffel. I think a black duffel.

He should have a camera too that he like webs to the wall that takes pictures of everything. Yeah. The daily bugle. There should also be a Jay Jonah Jameson who comes in and says, I'm going to get pictures of you. You're a menace. The Spider-Man should have a bag that looks like a web, which Spider-Man would sometimes do. Something like that.

would be... Not a little pink suitcase. Well, because it makes you have too many questions. But did the kids have any questions, or did they just see it and get it? I think that they were fine in general, but I think I don't know what the actual reaction was. I feel like there was a lot of just like, okay, we're playing with them now. Like, I don't know if they were like, it's Spider-Man. You've seen the video of the little kid who loves, uh, it's, is it Jason?

No, it's a Mike Myers for Halloween. Yes, yes, yes. It's so funny because like, oh, because that little kid who loves that character, yeah. that character and views it as like a Mickey Mouse type character. So he comes around the corner and it looks ominous, but she just like runs up and hugs him and he hugs her back. It's so funny. It's so funny.

It's so funny. And I just saw a video of a like probably nine-year-old girl who loves Michael McDonald. And her dad surprised her with, do you know where we're at? We're at this place and we're going to see the Doobie Brothers. Do you know what that means? She goes, Michael McDonald's. And he goes, that's right, Michael McDonald is singing with the Doobie brothers? Do you want to go inside?

She's like, yeah. And then he's taking video the whole time. She's like nine with glasses and cute. And she's like screaming, Michael! The entire time. Hey, wait a minute, wait a minute. Hey, hold on. Hold on.

Dumbies. Stop. Shut up, doobie. This is, I haven't stopped a song since rerun had the tape recorder fall out of his. Now that's a, don't panic, folks. That's not happening here. Do I hear a child's voice out there? Someone under 80?

And so then he's like going off stage and she's waving to him and he like waves up there and she's like Michael McDonald waved at me. Michael McDonald waved at me. And then her dad very nicely like takes her back to the cordoned off area where the buses are or whatever and has her weight and he comes over and signs her poster that she got. And she's just like, you saw me and you wave to me. and he's like, oh, yeah, but not a lot of kids. And he's like, you're actually very special.

And the dad is like, she's actually a huge fan. I didn't make her do this. I don't want to be here. I don't like your music. I'm having a hard time. All right, we have to stick right. That's a good, I think you should leave sketch. Yep.

Yeah. All right. For now. Only 18 states require sex ed to be medically accurate. And relationship classes, Let's fix that. I'm Shan, an A-Sertified Sex Educator with a Masters in Psych. And on my podcast, Lovers by Shan, we make learning about love as mind-blowing as making it.

Celebrities and fascinating people share an intimate story. Then we uncover the lesson for all of us. Watch Lovers by Shan from Lemonada Media on YouTube or listen wherever you like your podcast. All right, we're back. And guess what? We got a Matt, I'll producer update. Yeah, Matt. I said that like it was a regular thing and then I realized.

Yeah, we've never had that. A Matt Appa update. He said, okay, this isn't a three-shirt, but a piss pig named Patrick White. By the way, shout out to the piss pigs. It's all over the place. I was leaving a show on Thursday night. Lacey Mosley's scam got us live. And as I was walking out, a gentleman yelled at me,

hey, Paul, I'm a piss pig. I also, by the way, I did a show the other night with Ben Schwartz and one of the nice people who worked there came up and said, I'm a freedom listener and then embarrassedly said, I guess I should say I'm a piss pig. Yeah, that's right, you should. And Taney was there and she laughed out loud and said, I'm so happy to see that in the wild.

If you say they're not supposed to say it proudly, you're supposed to say it. You're supposed to be embarrassed. With shame, with shame. Yes. All right. I thought there was, there was, an update.

There's two, we got two updates. Two, okay, you're doing him in order? Two Matt and I producer updates. He said the first update. Okay, this isn't a three-tribed but a piss pig named Patrick White sent this video.

I want to keep it a surprise, so here it is. Okay. And then I'm clicking on the link. I'm plugged into the ox. It is loading. Here we go. Oh, Scott, Paul, and Lauren. Oh, my God.

We know. I know that your fans. I've actually heard about your podcast from a lot of Oh no, no, no. Paige, I'm just here to tell you that I will never be a guest. Oh! And God's mentioned to me like, I've sent out messages saying if they, if you want me on, I would be more than delighted to come on. But if you don't, that's also a...

Paige, we need you. She's clearly never heard the show. No. Well, that was funny. That was good. That was good. She got us. She looks terrific, by the way.

Let me see. Oh, she does. Her hair looks great. Like her hair. Beautiful eyes. Yeah. She looks fresh as a daisy. Beautiful eyelashes.

Let me see. She does. Yeah. Oh, no. I hope that's not true. Alert from cameo. And now I know. So anyway, all that being said, I'm very flattered.

I'm glad you guys are fans. That was the whole thing. Well, honestly, I'll let her finish. Let her finish. Whoa. What a nice lady. The fuck. Oh.

Wow. Okay, Patrick, don't abuse that number. Don't, yeah, Patrick. Don't ask her for tips on how to trade spaces with what of your neighbor. Don't be sending Paige Davis a you up. That was so nice. Wow. I liked the fake out.

I liked the not fake out. And I liked all of it. You know, it's a tough situation we're in because I think we moved on. And we said Reggie Miller and then we... The time did pass. But it sounds like she was trying to find us during that time and so that's really frustrating. We're going to have to talk about this off air.

Yeah, yeah, we're going to have a group meeting with our secretary and treasure. Amazing to hear from Paige. Oh my God. Thank you, Patrick. And thank you, Patrick. That was a really great gift. That was really delightful. Incredible.

It's so nice to hear from her and it's so great to see her. It really was. I enjoy her. Broadway's own Paige Davis. Well, that was really nice. That was so cool. Very cool of her. Thank you, Paige.

That was maybe the first time I've understood why cameo is cool. Not because of me. That was the best cameo I could have received is how I should have phrased that, even though I do want one from you. I feel like Bono should do cameo. Why? It'd be funny. He has no reason. Hi, it's Bono.

Do you feel like they would be... Don't you think he'd be inundated? He'd never be able to stop. Do you feel like they'd be 30 seconds or they'd be 10 minutes long? 10 minutes. And but I feel like to weed out unsurious people, you'd have to charge like $10,000 a cameo for him. Do you think it would ever include phrases like,

we're all just people? Like at some point that comes up. All right, Matt, I'll producer update number two. Oh, God. Another update. What's he doing another one? Another one. Kelly Strobel, who writes,

whipped this up after listening today and I don't know. I think it's a bob. Okay. We'll be the judges of that. Was that you gasping or was that calls video? I just saw crazy news on my phone. I should be. Yeah

That's just the way it works You're perfect No, that was actually him That's just the way it works That's just the way it works Some things will never change What? What?

I sang that part That was, yeah, that's us, I think. That's us, I think. I didn't know we did that so much. We're perfect. That's just the way it works. We're perfect. Kelly, thank you so much.

Thank you, Kelly. Can we put that on Instagram somehow? Is that possible? No. It's impossible. They haven't figured that out how to do that. Can you upload original audio? No.

No, they haven't. It's a weird iPhone quirk. All right. Guess we can't. Now, it's time to play iPhone quirk. I love it. Wow. Incredible.

Thank you to our. our loving pisspigs. I feel like in Page Davis were actually to be on the show, we would have to explain the concept of pisspigs to her, and that would be too embarrassing for me. It's too embarrassing to explain the whole situation. I hope this is okay to share.

But this is from... Matt's got another update? This is from my dear friend, Mendel Mon. Oh, no, it's not a... She just texted me a screenshot. Somebody wrote to her saying, Hi, Mandel.

I know you're probably not going to see this, but nevertheless, I wanted to ask you if you had any idea where I could stream a billion dollar properties because I want to watch it so bad. But there's no way in hell I'm paying per episode or season. Or season? Yeah. And she, I'll just wrote, I love our fans. I mean, season, if you're not even willing to pay per season, that to me doesn't make any sense.

It's like you get it all at once for a bulk price. It's so crazy how everyone just is like, everything should be free. all the time. There's a lot of that. I mean, we're in a really horrible time with so many streamers and services that, like, you have to have to spend hundreds to have all of them. Like, it doesn't make me sense. I will say I recently got rid of cable and I now only use Hulu Live. And I'm pretty excited. It saved me $100 a month when I figured out the math on that. Can I have it? No. You actually can't share it because it knows your location. Oh. Well, I'm saving it now. No, but can I have it? No, I'm saving it for something really special.

Are you really? Because I want to have $1,200 a year now, because I'm not spending that on cable. For how many years? Forever. So, because I'll probably never get it again. So say, like, how many more years do you think you'll be alive? I'll be alive. 60, maybe?

I hope so. Okay, so 60 years at $1,200 a year. Yeah. We're talking somewhere in the range of like 70-something thousand dollars. Bruce Hornsby in the range? Yeah. That's just the way it works. So I think I'll buy like a really fancy.

car right now. Right now and then just like, no, that's that money. Yeah, yeah. Great. I feel like collecting cars is a sign of a bad person. Really? Who do we know? Not take.

Would you say that I collect cars because Kulap has one and I have one? Oh shit. Janie and I each have cars. You collect it all too. Fuck. Yeah. I just, it's like, I don't know. It just seems it's such a gross thing to collect.

It's so. I always feel like how often do you. get to use each one. That's the part. If you're Jay Leno, you're out there driving them all. Is he? Yes. When he goes to give his donuts to the Writers Guild, is he in a different car?

He drives different cars all the fucking time. When he, at least he would always go to Bob's Big Lord. When he was doing the Tonight Show, he would drive a different car there. Every day. Yeah. But that's his touring money. Yeah. He doesn't touch his Tonight Show money.

Well, he still doesn't. Will he just give that money to us, please? If you're not going to touch it, I'll touch it. I'll touch the shit out of it. I'll have the cars. I'd love to have a lot of cars. I don't know. There was a second where I thought it'd be fun to have like a sort of like a convertible that's like, you know, not expensive or something.

But like something's like to take on the weekends. But then I was like, yeah, it's probably going to have to. I don't even like going to go anywhere on the weekends. It's going to be a lot of worked up, keep this thing. And then I'm going to get my, I'm going to get sunburned. I thought that so many times about like a classic car or something. Yeah. Yeah. But then it's just a nightmare.

It seems like a lot of work. It also is like how much money are you. like 30 grand if you get something in like shitty condition or whatever and then that's so much money for something you're all you're gonna drive like 35 times and I really don't want to be broken down on the side of the road with that kind of situation where yeah what do you want to be broken down by the side of the road what kind of situation do you want to be next to a McDonald's oh okay oh fun yeah I can go in the play place have some fries yeah two fries I'd have two fries I'd have two fries we only sell them in one and a two

Groups of 25 or so. No sale. I want fries or I'm starving. Could we do the game? No, Whitney, we're out of time. We are? Oh, shit. The surprises took up the future time.

I love surprises. That's just the way it works. That's just the way it works. Some things will never change. Never change, babe. No, no. Okay, take that and do something with it. That was a better version.

It works. It works. It works. It works. Well, we got to go. Listen, You want to hear ad-free editions? At this point, I think you can only hear them on CVBWorld.com.

I believe that's true because I just got some news. I just got some late breaking news five minutes before we started the show that digital premium is going away. Yes, they are discontinuing operations. So, but you can hear those. They were operating on people? I think all five subscribers. That's so weird.

Like Frankenstein situation? I have to find a new place to go. Well, CBBWorld.com has all the ad-free episodes. So that's the only place you're really going to go. Let me let's. And you get so much. more. So you can hear ad-free episodes on CBPworld.com.

If you'd like to write to us, send a three-cher. You can write to us at 3DMUSA at gmail.com. If you would like to call us and ask for some advice or just tell us an amusing story or whatever the fuck you do, call us at Hague Claims 8. But now I would like to close it out by formally reading this announcement from Stitcher. Okay. Oh, good. I didn't get to see this.

This was via the social media platform Twitter. The Stitcher app and website. The place for racist congregate? Yes, the very same. Also, Jack owns Blue Sky. I just want to say that. Anyway. The Stitcher app and website

will discontinue operations on August 29th, 20203. For Inchin, for Inchimation on how to export your show list and other questions, please visit, and then there's a link. If you are a creator and have questions about your show distribution,

please visit our FAQs here. What? I'm supposed to find it on a website? After August. something everyone could see. This account will transition to Stitcher Studios and provide updates about the podcast produced within a network. Thank you for giving us the opportunity over the last decade

to create the best possible podcast listening. Best possible, not the best podcast. They tried really hard. But if you, so you're saying if I want to know what's going to happen to my shows that are on there, I have to go to the FAQ that anyone on this listening to us right now. So you all could find out. So why doesn't want someone listening to this, go look, can tell me what's happening to all my shows.

Well, we're going to miss you our IP to a real one. Yes, you are very divisive within the podcast listening community. People really had a lot of opinions about you, and that's great. Yes. Some people liked you. Most people hated you. Yeah. But don't worry about us.

We're not going away. I think we have three more episodes after it goes away. But we're not going away anytime soon, but the ad-free episodes will only be on CBB world. Yeah. But we love you for listening and please don't bother Page anymore. I think we have it covered at this point. We'll take it from here. The fact that she responded was amazing.

Although I wouldn't mind if you got in touch with Reggie Miller. No, no, don't waste his time now. Oh, God. If you can, if your psychic and can talk to Clara Peller, would love to hear what she's up to. Is it a waste of time to get money to do a little dumb video? No. It is, actually. I tricked you.

Okay. All right. All right. Goodbye. Bye. Bye. Want to listen to your favorite Lemonada shows without the ads? Subscribe to Lemonada Premium on Apple Podcasts.

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