Threedom - You're a Fun Drunk

Episode Date: February 13, 2025

Lauren, Scott, and Paul discuss being overserved, handwriting, and improvising before playing Taboo Word. Send Threetures and emails to [e-mail] us a voicemail asking us a question at hagclaims8.comFollow us on Instagram @ThreedomUSA.Listen ad-free and unlock bi-weekly THREEMIUMS on cbbworld.comGrab some new Threedom merch at cbbworld.com/merchSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hi, I'm Reshma Sajjani, founder of Girls Who Code. Look, I'd consider myself a pretty successful adult woman. I've written books, founded two successful nonprofits, and I'm raising two incredible kids. But here's the thing. I still wake up wondering, is this it? And if the best years are yet to come, when's that going to start? Join me on my so-called midlife, my new podcast with Lemonada Media, where we're building

a playbook for navigating midlife, one episode at a time. Each week, I'll chat with extraordinary guests who've transformed their midlife crisis into opportunities for growth and newfound purpose. At some point, we all ask ourselves, is there more to life? I'm here to discover how to thrive in my second act, right alongside you. My so-called midlife is out now,

wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Coolop Eulisak. And I'm Soojin Park. And we're your aunties on Add to Cart, a podcast all about the things we buy, the things we buy into, and what that says about who we are. We're real life friends who love to talk about what we're adding to cart. Sometimes that means trying the latest snail serum to slather on our faces, or a sweater that screams one third ugly.

That's right, Soo. Each week we dive into honest, oftentimes TMI conversations about what's taking up space in our shopping carts and in our minds, be it products, trends, or something for our auntie book club. We also bring guests on the show and take a peek into their carts because the things a person buys or doesn't says a lot about them.

We like to think of ourselves as aunties to all, fun, slightly unhinged, and always ready to share some sage advice and a good product wreck. Add to Cart is out now wherever you get your podcasts. 3-0! Ha-hoo, ha-ha, ga-ki-ki-ki, bante, do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do as a nation when we stopped having this sound in songs. Boo! Boo boo boo boo boo! It's such a fun sound. What was the purpose of it? Because it was in 70s music and early 80s music. Kind of exclusively.

It was to trigger, it was to activate your drugs that were in your system. Oh, that's what it was. Everyone stopped taking drugs. Yeah. And then- Other than our sponsor. Soul.

Those don't make me feel crazy. They make me feel great. Yes. those don't make me feel crazy. They make me feel great. Yes. I don't make me feel like dancing. Don't feel like dancing. They make me feel like relaxing. The scissors sisters. That says it says scissors. Those crazy lesbians.

Well, the scissors scissors. I don't believe they are less. But isn't that what that means? Oh, yes. Yes. OK. Don't do the gesture means? Oh, yes. Yes, of course. Okay, don't do the gesture. So hard at this. You have to do it really hard if you don't feel anything.

Hurting the webbing of my fingers. You're Spider-Man? Spider-Man? Spider-Man. Does whatever Spider-Man can. Hey everyone, welcome to Freedom. I'm Scott. I'm Paul.

And I'm Lauren. And we're back together in the same room. Yeah, it's nice. You can't stop us. Did you put tissue in your guitar to stop the ghost from strumming it? Why are you always looking this way at all of my possessions?

Because I'm always seated here. We've never changed seats in every... Should we do that sometime? Yeah, but not right now. No, not right now. Next episode. It's gonna change everything I talk about. It'll change everything.

Yeah. Okay, so I- Including the balance of power in the DC universe. Yeah. I put a paper towel in the hole of my guitar. I put a paper towel in the hole of my guitar. Basically like deadening the strings because I have this guitar

mounted to the wall, the holder mounted to the wall. Because you shot it. Yes, exactly. And I'm very proud of it. You removed the body. You stalked and shot it in the woods. And I noticed anytime I would watch a movie in here, I would hear this hum and it was the base of the movie

or whatever making the strings vibrate and so I needed to deaden it and so I did. Great. Then I have assholes like you coming around here. It's just an honest question. I'm just curious. You did, I will say you came in a little hot with that question as if he had done something wrong. This is great feedback. I would love to be better about how I communicate. Guys, I will be frank with you. Yeah. Okay. I was over served last night in my own home.

No, in your own home, who was serving you? Me. And we had a couple of people over, our friend, one of our friends was in town from New York. I know who this is. Does the man live in New York? Is that who you're referring to, the man? The man lives in New York.

He does, I didn't know that. This is the Statue of Liberty? Yes, who's a man by the way? Yeah. Yeah. And we were watching traitors. I just watched the last night, too. And we had two blackouts over the course of the lights and you.

Well, it was pouring rain. It was pouring rain. And so the power just suddenly went out. And then we lit candles and then we. Does it ever like give you like it always suddenly goes out. It doesn't ever give you like a hey, I'm going out in about 10 minutes no a lot of times we'll have appliances go off one at a time later so we lit candles and then we were just like hanging out and it was you know there's it's kind of fun when it hurts

oh it's so fun yeah it's change of pace you know we could just turn it's so fun. Yeah. It's the, it's like. Change of pace. You know, we could just turn off the lights at any time and put out candles, but we're not going to do that. Then eventually. What would you think if like Mike one day, your husband. Oh yeah. Uh, just like all the lights. You're married to Mike one day.

All the lights went out and he's like, oh no, the power's out and you got candles and it was nice and romantic. And then you found out three weeks later that he had just turned the lights out and lied's like, Oh no, the power's out. And you got candles and it was nice and romantic. And then you found out three weeks later that he had just turned the lights out and lied about it because you won't give him sex. So he like, he like made my computer not work. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He flipped all the breakers. Okay. a breaker, yeah. Oh, okay, okay. He's like, oh no, the power, we don't like it. That's a good impression. I think I would say,

Oh no. Hey, why don't you just tell me I'm not giving enough sex to you? He's too scared to ask. But he could just tell me. He's too scared. Okay. You're very intimidating.

I know, I do yell a lot and I bare my teeth. It's a weird thing to do and you'd have to- Oh, Mike is a chimpanzee. You would have to wonder like, what else is he lying about? I would get, it would open up a can of worms. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. How would I find out?

Eventually he'd go, hey, by the way, that didn't really happen. No, no, you would like talk about the outages and stuff like that, that everyone had. And everyone would be like, we never had any outages. And then I called the company and they're like, that didn't happen. Yeah. And then you dust the breaker for fingerprints and see his thumbprint on it. But then I'm like, but he lives here.

Perfect rhyme. So then you would, he would talk in his sleep and he would confess. Why didn't you just cut right to that? Oh, okay. But wait, Trader's last night. He's in the middle of his story. So lights go out. We don't, it takes an hour before they're back on.

We did not realize it was an hour. We were having like a lovely time, but we're like all drinking wine and stuff. Then we watched. Spilled the wine. We watched. Spilled the tea. So then lights come back on.

Then there's that excitement of the lights come back on. Hey! We watch five more minutes of Traders. Lights go off again. Oh, this is the worst. Relight the candles. And then our friend is like, I think I'm gonna, if the lights don't come back on soon,

I'm just gonna go, I'm just gonna leave. We're like, oh, okay. And then the lights came back on again. And we continued, we watched the rest of Traders. It was a lot of fun, but I did have too much wine. See, I think God was trying to get you guys to bond. And then when he said he was just gonna leave, God was like, fine, I'll just let you watch Traders.

Yeah, yeah. What's funny is we didn't like each other before we started watching Traders. And by the end, I can't imagine my life without this person. So it did work. It was God's plan. It was God's plan. God's plan. I'm really excited for our eventual Traders night that we're going to have. Yes. I can't wait. I got to get that in the books because I'm, the more I'm watching, the more excited I'm getting. And last night's episode. I haven't seen it. I was over served myself last night.

Wow. By two places, where I ordered two drinks a piece at each of them. What was your day? What was up with you, buddy? I met a friend from Los Angeles. Okay, always say where people are from. And we went to see a movie, but we met at a bar before. And then I lost my phone during the movie.

Oh no. And I couldn't enjoy the last half. A few TikToks you were gonna watch during the film. Exactly. Did you hear it fall out of your pocket? No, so I just, I reached for it. This is how engrossing the movie was. And now 90 minutes into it, I wasn't even thinking about it. And then about a half an hour before I was like,

I don't wonder what's going on. Like what time is this? Basically, I had to go to the restroom and I was like, is this movie ending soon? Can I hold, can I hold it? I reached for my phone. It's not there. And suddenly I have to say, is, is it, so I start feeling around on the ground. It's not there. And suddenly I have to say, is, is it, so I start feeling around on the ground. It's not there. It all is sticky, sticky, sticky bubble gum. A lady calls the usher because she thinks you're a masher. What's a masher?

It's like a creep. Yeah. It's like such an ancient term. I feel like I know it from Bugs Bunny. Yeah. Or like comics where like a lady would hit someone with a purse and go, MASHER! But so I start, I'm just freaking out going like, is it at the bar or is it down below and I don't have a flashlight or anything like that. So finally this movie, this movie is just going on. The underworld.

So I, I, I excuse myself and I go like, and I run to the bathroom. I come back in, right as the credits come up. Oh! Right as the credits come up. Dumb. And then the fine folks at the AMC Burbank helped me out with my situation

and it was wedged in between seats. They're like, people lose things in these all the time. And it wasn't underneath, it was like wedged in, like under, it was like, you when you when someone loses their phone on an airplane yeah they're like we need to take this seat out in order to get it you know I don't know that but I I can imagine it yeah anyway and that's where it was thanks to the fine folks who by the way said said he was a fan at the end of the exchange didn't make me feel bad about being a daughter-in-old fool.

Yes. I can't find my device. What else do people lose in those, when they say these are all kinds of things? Lip gloss. Lip gloss. Wallet. Wallet.

Thankfully it was a documentary. Small purse. I can just look up what happened. Jacks. It was a documentary? Can you tell us what it was called? Becoming Led Zeppelin. Okay. I think I know what that's about.

Yeah. A guy who wanted to be a band. A guy who wanted to be a band that used to exist. Oh, wait, wait, wait. I feel like I saw a trailer for that a while ago. Yeah. I'd never heard of it, but it was. It looked good.

Yeah, it was good. Yeah. It was all just about them Coming to bands and then it it ends right second a piece that's a good right when they get famous Well, you actually don't know when so literally is just up to the point where they become famous. It's up to Led Zeppelin, too It's like now you're like goodbye. I'm being old. You are the weakest link The last two seconds you won't become let's open But a fine night, but I feel like I was over served. And then what? You went to a dinner later? No, no, it was just those two.

It was the theater and the bar were the two places. Oh, you had two drinks at the theater? Of course I went to McGuffins. Oh, theater, theater bar. Is that what it's called? McGuffins, yes. By the way, when I was in line getting getting food, the guy was joking around going, thank you for coming to our fine establishment.

McGuffins. They just start calling it that? No, that's the name of it. Why is he joking that? It's at the brand, the Americana. Is that like, it's a bunch of them. But he said. Oh, they have more than one theater? like, it's a bunch of them. But he said- Oh, they have a more than one theater?

Was he saying it's jokingly? Or he was being serious? He was saying, he was like kind of playing it up like, thanks for coming to McGuffin's. Cause the one at the Americana, it's basically like, it's- The one at the Americana is kind of sad. It's just the hallway? It's so far away.

It's so far away from the theaters. From everything. I think you should have gone to Cheesecake. Which theater did you go to? This is Burbank. In Burbank. I was thinking they don't have any other bars. It's an AMC thing. Oh, at the Americana, they don't have other bars there.

There's nowhere else to really get a drink. Well, there's Cheesecake Factory. There's other places to get drinks there. Oh, really? Oh, well, there's, well, there's Cheesecake Factory. There's other places to get drinks there. Yeah. Oh, really? Oh, well, there's, yep. There's Bakery, which I love. There's what? Bakery. I don't know Bakery.

There's a few locations, Silver Lake, there's one at the Americana, well, outside of the Americana, and then- Is this interesting to anyone who doesn't live in Los Angeles? I don't know, but if they do live there, they might want to eat that. Maybe they're planning a trip.

Yeah, plan a trip to Bakery. It's yummy, and I always saidocari, but then their shirts show you how to pronounce it on the back. Oh. Bocari. Bocari. Now I understand. I would have thought Bocari as well.

Yeah. Because it's like Bacardi without the D. Mm. Cardi D. It says Boc-ar-i. Cardi D. Car-B-D. Carpe Diem.

We've solved it. Yes. That's so fun. What did you drink solved it. Yes. That's so fun. What did you drink? Wine. OK. Yeah. But we wanted to drink during the movie,

so we had some drinks before and then some drinks during the movie. That led to me. Kissing him. Not realizing that my phone was gone. Yeah. And did you trash the theater afterwards? Oh, yeah.

Yeah. Like Led Zeppelin. Yeah. Where's my fucking phone theater afterwards? Oh yeah, yeah. Led Zeppelin would have done. Like Led Zeppelin, yeah. Where's my fucking phone? My TV threw that screen. Okay. Sorry you can't bring that in here. It's my TV.

I can bring my TV wherever I like. Show me where it says I can't bring my own television into this movie theater. It says that about food, but my TV is not food. That's right. Of course we all know about the story when I went to the Universal Theater and I bought a popcorn-opolis gift popcorn

for someone at Christmas and they wouldn't let me in with it. Of course we all know about that. I think that that's wrong. I think it's a gift box, it's so stupid. And you're in a mall, you have to be able to buy stuff. Was it in a basket, one of those kind of things? Yeah, it was wrapped up in a bow. Yeah, I'm just gonna crack this open.

Yeah, I just had to spend $80 on my popcorn. Yeah, this is my only option to get popcorn in here. Shout out to my friend David Reese, who told a story on his podcast, Electra Profit Makers, that when he was a kid, his friends, he and his little friend were going to the movies and his mom said, his little tiny friend, smallest guy you ever saw. She, she did not want to give them money for concessions. She said,

you can bring popcorn. She made them popcorn. I like shopping bags. So they show up with these big bags full of homemade popcorn and the guy at the theater is just like, yeah, you can't bring that in here. Well, why open the bag to show him it's popcorn? Well, because it was- Is it overflowing?

It's like the butter is dripping through the bottom of the bag. I think these are like paper bags. That is, it is interesting because my parent, my mother in particular was- Is one of your parents? Yeah, it's so crazy. Isn't that weird how our mothers are related to us?

Yes. But she's, as she says, a rule follower and a fine Christian woman. She's proud of it. But that was the one rule she would break, is she would bring snacks into the theater in her purse. And because it was way too expensive, you know. But also it is way too expensive.

I'll ask for you lawyers and Pharisees. We did that. We would bring in Coke and candy and stuff. And then cracking it, you had to like kind of wait for like a moment to crack it. Yes, yeah. But also no one's ever gonna catch, no one ever tried to catch us.

No. And also it to catch us. No. And also it is too expensive. Yeah. And like, if I'm gonna eat candy at the movies, I'll just bring it. If your business is dependent on overcharging for things, then your business model does not work. Agreed.

You know what I'm saying? Yes. But you know what I'm- But don't forget, you can get our Christmas cards, a kinship card. Yes, that's right. You know what I'm- Don't forget, you can get our Christmas cards at Kinship Coast. Yes. That's right. You know what we're missing though, is bulk candy stores.

And I think the pandemic probably killed a lot of them. Bulk candy stores. I know what they are. Like the Sweet Factory. Sweet Factory. I don't know what this is. Remember Sweet Factory at the mall? Maybe it wasn't West Coast, but it was like, you know, you just go scoop out the candies

you want and pay by the pound. Oh, yeah. And I always loved doing that before the movies and getting all the candy that I wanted, all the types. And I also had a dream of opening a candy store when I was... Lauren had a dream. Like in my 20s, I thought it was a good idea to have one next to UCB because this was candy stores were more of a thing. But I was like, that would be so great. People wait in line and they get their candy and they go, let's see. And I just thought it'd be cute.

But instead, vegan ice cream. And instead I didn't do shit. And I would have gone under and lost money. That's true. Yeah. A lot of stuff doesn't stick in that strip. What's the business that you would start if you had to start a business with?

You know what I mean? Like a storefront, or you sold something. Probably like I'd breed dogs and stuff. Boo! Ah, ah, ah! I'd probably start a puppy mill. I think I would do a hat store. I would do a hat store. Would you try to buy the trademark to hats in the Belfry?

No. Oh, why not? What would you call it? I don't think it's good. Hat F. Tompkins. Paul F. Hatkins. Paul Hat. You know what?

Hatkins. I would call it Hatkins. Hatkins. That's not bad. Hatkins is pretty good. Yeah. Yeah. Hey, Hatkins.

I'm going down to Hatkins today. When I first joined Twitter, my handle was Twitterkins. And then I changed it at some point to my name because I thought, oh, you should, it's probably better to have my name in there. And I wish I hadn't done it. I wish I had just, I just stuck with Twitterkins. Is that your biggest regret? Yeah. My only regret. That's good. Yeah. No, my life is great. You're a sociopath. Yes. I don't know why that has to be part of it. I wish it was Twitterkins. How many hats do you have to sell?

Because there are stores like Litts. Easy Bob Dylan. How many do you have to sell per day in order to stay in business? One $1,000 hat. Yeah, and that's what I would do. All it takes is one. You would come into the showroom

and there would be one hat in the middle of the store. We only have one of these today. This is the hat of the showroom and there will be one hat in the middle of the store. On a, on a revolving day. And it basically, whoever gets it first, you close immediately. Yeah. We had it's sold in one size. It's kind of a good idea. You build demand. Yes.

And you're like, you know, if you, if you like team up with like a rapper or something, and some people are like, oh, that's actually really cool. And then- So it's like a Hatkins X, like Kendrick Lamar. Macklemore, yeah. Yeah, Macklemore. Should we release one episode for a million dollars

like the Wu-Tang Clan did and just see if anyone would buy it? Yeah. Why not? And we'll say, we'll tell everyone that on that episode we're gonna say a bunch of shit we never would ever say. Yeah, anytime we say like, oh, I'll tell you who this is off mic. We'll say it on that episode, we're gonna say a bunch of shit we never would ever say. Yeah, anytime we say like, oh, I'll tell you who this is off mic,

we'll say it on that. We'll say all those people, everyone we ever said that about will be revealed. Yeah. That's a great idea. It is a good idea. There's gonna be one millionaire who's a fan. What if it's Martin Screlli?

I don't care if I'm getting the money. That Wu-Tang album is probably bad, right? What they released it for a million dollars? I think it was a million, wasn't it? I don't know the story. With the conditions if you bought it that you could never release it yourself, it had to be for your enjoyment only. That's so bizarre. I think Martin Screlli who bought it.

Oh, that's really what happened? Yeah. Wait, that's crazy. I don't know this at all. He, I think what happened, I may be talking out of my ass, but I believe what happened was he copied it. Like it was repossessed from him because he owed the government so much money when he got convicted, but he had made a copy and he was like, Oh, Oh, I'm'm gonna release it or something like that. What a punk, why would you make a copy when that's the one rule? Yeah.

I don't think he cares about rules very much, does he? It would be a very clear cut thing where then you would be back in court and sued. Yeah. So, but I guess if you're Martin Screlli. Martin Screlli. And you're doing it all for the attention. And you are a fucking asshole, then no problem.

Yeah. If I could open a store i think it would be like a boutique where i get to pick every single little fun thing and i would have stationary and pens and i would have because i love pens and stationary and then i would have like all sorts of cute little products do you try to match your pens and stationary when you write on the station i try to use a pen that looks good on the paper. Meaning the ink looks good on the paper, not- Yeah, not the pen.

So, I mean, you're saying this like I'm crazy, but you're the one who said you love pens and stationery. I hate like a pen that doesn't have any role to it. Like a sort of like standard- Like you put it down on the paper. You try to write a letter and it just stays there. Yeah. I hate that. But you know, like those pens where it's like, you're saying knives, it doesn't like glide. It's just. Yeah.

And like my handwriting gets so much worse when I want to smooth. Roller ball. Do you do a lot of writing in, in, I guess, in stationery or in journals? I do. I've always written a lot of letters, but I now just basically seem to collect it and not really use it. So I do have fun. I'd love to get a letter from you someday. I'll send you one. I'll send you one today. I would love, you know, like the Groucho letters. I would love some correspondence. Oh, okay. Yeah, collect. That would be good.

You could keep that for the museum. Yeah, it would be funny for us to all write each other letters and then buying them in a book and sell them for a million dollars. Now here's the thing. My handwriting is terrible. Really? I don't know if I've seen it. It's so bad.

And I have to actually, I have to write a bunch of thank you notes very soon. Did you do something that I wasn't invited to? Yeah, exactly. Oh, no, just for practice. This is sus. No, it was for a, I don't wanna say because what if people that are- That are going to receive these?

Yes. Well, all I know is we're not receiving them. Yeah, you're not. So we don't care. I guess I didn't do it. I have no reason to thank either of you for anything. Do anything for you. Tell us what it is off mic, OK? Because we need to take a break right now.

But obviously, if you're a millionaire, you will find out. You'll find out. All right, we'll be right back. Creating really great retail experiences is tough, I agree. especially with multiple stores, teams of staff, fulfillment centers, separate workflows. It's a lot.

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a thousand locations. Paul, imagine this. Imagine being able to guarantee that shopping is always convenient endless aisle ship to ship to ship to ship to ship to ship to ship to ship to customer buy online pickup in store all made simpler so customers can shop how they want and staff have the tools to close the sale every time. Business owners get it okay. Acquiring new customers is expensive. With Shopify POS, you can keep shoppers coming back with personalized experiences and first-party data that give marketing teams a competitive edge. Hey, I have the receipts.

Based on a report from EY, businesses on Shopify POS see real results. Like 22% better total cost of ownership and benefits equivalent to an 8.9% uplift in sales on average relative to the markets that surveyed. Do you want more? Of course you do. Check out Shopify.com slash freedom, all lowercase, you uppercase queens, and learn how to create the best retail experiences without complexity. Shopify.com slash. Freedom. Freedom.

Hey everyone. Today's episode is sponsored by Acorns. On a previous episode, previously on freedom, I should say, we shared that Lauren's goal for 2025 was better fitness and Scott and Paul's goal for 2025 was to put their brains in jars. When I say them, I mean me and Paul, I guess. So anyway, we've already set the bar for our goals pretty high and they're not going as well as we'd hoped. A month in, my brain is still in my cranium. It's tough to find the right scientists to do it. But you know, if you're falling behind on your resolutions and you need a partner to make things automatic and to turn your financial

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Quince.com slash threedom. So I have to write about a dozen notes and I feel like it should be handwritten. Yeah. What I'm gonna do first is though, I'm gonna make drafts on my laptop. Yeah. So I'm not figuring it out. Figure it out as you're writing this. Sometimes I do that and then I'm gonna make drafts on my laptop. Yeah. So I'm not like figuring it out.

As you're writing this. Sometimes I do that and then I'm like, well that started the sentences, not really what I wanna say, but I'll just make that make sense. Yeah. Yeah. Or I hate scratching out on a card. Oh, it's such a defeat.

It's terrible. It's humiliating. It's humiliating. Or it's like you get, you get down to the bottom, you're like over. Yeah. Right in the back. Ugh. Yeah.

You start real big at the top, get smaller and smaller and smaller. You know, I got, I received. Get bigger, bigger. Fill in the space. I received a, I send Christmas cards as you know, and I got one back in the mail today. No. And it's from, it's from a relative.

Oh, meaning not one of the ones you sent that got returned to you. It was. It was. Returned to me. But it was because. Returned to sender? Well.

Address unknown? From the post office, but it was like, saying the address is not, but every year this happens with this address and every year I check with the people and go, is this your because I don't know what I'm writing. I'm trying to send you a card just so you know you're included in this. I just cannot get this probably a problem for other people like creditors. They have been so confused every time.

I don't know. Nothing's wrong with what you wrote. I'm like, I don't understand. I'm like, did I leave out a word? Like, I'm like, what is wrong? And then, and I even looked it up on Google maps like that is a building. Yeah.

Sounds like a job for the postman. Yeah. So anyway, this is the third year in a row where I'm just going to go, by the way, I tried to send it to you, not left out. Cause there- Kevin Costner at the end of the year should gather up all the mail that was not sent and just

Deliver it hand deliver it to be people would be thrilled. They'd be like the postman himself Tom Petty would have been like I'm famous you're famous You're so bad Tom Petty would have been great as that turtle from Finding Nemo. Yeah, it was a missed opportunity. Do you think he auditioned or was he like, I'm all for only guys? Do you know they do a thing?

And hey, what are you doing? Pushing your glasses up. The brink of his nose. I'm a nerd. I was like, dude, I'm a real poindexter. At Disneyland and I guess World, they apparently have, I heard about this and then I saw a clip of it on Instagram, it was very sweet. They have this thing where that turtle, whatever his fucking name is, who sounds like a surfer

dude. Yeah, the stone turtle. You think he's stoned? Well, he might enjoy. We might turtle getting high under the ocean. Can you imagine, um, they do a thing where you can interact with him. He's like on a screen and then there's a person who's like an improviser who can see, you know, everybody and talk to the kids and everything.

It's very sweet. And this kid had a Buzz Lightyear doll he was holding. And the turtle's like, who are you holding? He's like, Buzz Lightyear. And he goes, oh wait, hold on a second. And then he swims behind a rock and then he comes back and he's holding a Buzz Lightyear. How did they do this?

I don't know, but it's so sweet. This must be AI. Also that would be a fun job. and then he swims behind a rock and then he comes back and he's holding a Buzz Lightyear. What? How did they do this? I don't know, but it's so sweet. This must be AI. Also that would be a fun job. Oh yeah. To be a kid holding a Buzz Lightyear. Yeah. For your job?

We've been talking about how, cause we have a Buzz, a Woody and a Jesse and they're really well made. I'm like, they crushed that. They crushed that. Making the movie about toys and then making the toys just as good as they are really well made. I'm like, they crushed that. They crushed that. Making the movie about toys and then making the toys just as good as they are in the movie. You better make it exactly.

It has to. We should do a podcast about t-shirts and then we sell the t-shirts. Yeah, let's do that. No, let's make a- Let's make a about t-shirts. Let's make a Pixar movie called T-shirts. Yeah. It's all t-shirts with personalities. Don't steal this by the way. And then we movie called T-shirts. We sell T-shirts with personalities.

Don't steal this by the way. And then we will sell T-shirts that look just like the T-shirts in the film and have the same personalities. Obviously the dirty gym shirt is kind of like a, you know. Jim Belushi, please. Hulk Hogan's shirt that he rips all the time is very frayed.

Tattered. The two halves of the ripped shirt played by the Sklar brothers. Right. Good. Emmy, we went on vacation to a place where. Good thinking. Yeah, it was. We were sort of like, do we go to a place here or? But we went to a place where there was a underwater

kind of marine thing that you could look through glass. What did you say? Sealed Team Six? Sealed Team Six, yes. Like an aquarium. Yes, like, well, it wasn't an aquarium. It was like- Was it the real ocean? No, no, but it was more like a giant pool,

but where no one was swimming in, it just had a lot of marine life. The aquarium? It's kind of like an aquarium. I don't know. That's kind of what you would call it. Okay, but in any case. When you say a pool, like a swimming pool?

It was a big body of water that was encased and closed. It's not encased because it had an open air. So they could see the sky. So you stand on the ground, you look down into the sky. No, no, no, like you go down like stairs and you can see. Through glass? Through glass. So let's call that an aquarium.

This sounds like an aquarium. It's an open air aquarium. Okay. Open air aquarium, open air aquarium. In any case, the point of this is anytime we bring up this place, yeah, we did a million fun things and she still remembers them. But the first thing she always says is like, I saw the scuba diver and he blew a heart at me because this one of the people who was

like taking care of the marine life sees the kids and then like with his oxygen tank or something, like blows bubbles out and he can shape them in hearts. What? Yeah. I wanna see that. Me too. So we thought it was just a like sweet memory

and I was always like, why is that the thing? Like out of the five days we were there where she went swimming and. Maybe because a man is showing love to her for the first time. She felt seen. But what we found out is like after the 20th time she was like, and I was scared.

And we went, oh, she's- Processing. Processing. Everything that Holly has been scared of becomes the thing she talks about forever and then she loves it. Yeah. It's every time we like do something and then it's like that didn't go well. She was so scared.

And then later she's like, we did this. Like we went to, we went to Disneyland when they had Nightmare Before Christmas as the haunted mansion and they like overlay everything with Nightmare Before Christmas. And I always forget when you walk into the Haunted Mansion, there's that part where you're in a dark room and then there's like a scream and like the hanging thing from the ceiling. It's always my way out.

Yeah, it's very scary. And I almost, like she almost wanted to leave at that point. And then we did the whole thing. And then at the end, she was like, wait, when's Jack Skellington's house? Probably what's like all she talks about. But they have like a process. Yeah, it's very funny.

But then when she's doing that, are you like, oh yeah, but tell them the real story, Holly. Yeah. You were scared. And you wanted to leave. And you shit your little pants. Literally Mike was like, should we leave? And I was like, no, she's going to end up loving this. Cause like we've had enough situations where I was like- I think I told you that, that when we went to California Adventure, when Kai was really young, we went on the goofy ride, which is legitimately scary. And he was like, the minute we took off, he goes, I want to get off. And it was terrified the entire time and going like, this is terrible.

I want off. I want off. And then at the end, he was like, maybe we should do it again. Kids are so funny. Kai, the entrepreneur. Does he have any schemes lately? Yeah, but I don't want to go with that. OK, fair enough. He's now getting older. I will for the millionaire. He's getting older.

He's into crypto. He's in high school. He's playing football. Wow. Can I tell a quick story about when I was over served last week? Oh, yeah. Yeah. We did go to Cheesecake Factory, actually, for my nephew's

birthday. That was his choice. In had, we did go to Cheesecake Factory actually for my nephew's birthday. That was his choice. And in Chicago though, that's fancy. That's considered, that's considered like people are in tuxedos and stuff. Honestly, it ain't cheap. So yeah, it's a lot. We went there and we, do you think it would be less expensive if they offered fewer fucking things? I mean, it's possible. It's possible. Less cheesecake, which is like the most expensive dessert to ever create. Oh, and that was really good though. I love cheesecake. I had a good die of a cheesecake.

Get out of here. I'm remembering, I'm not derailing you. No. I'm remembering a cheesecake that I had over the Christmas break that- A thought bubble appeared above Paul's head. My mother-in- law's friend made this cheesecake and it was exactly like the cheesecake that my mother used to make. And it was fucking delicious.

It was wild to have that taste again after such a long time. That's very nice. Yeah. Um, did she did they used to make that together or like she used her recipe or was it something that they just both happened to make? My mom and this lady. Wasn't it her, his, her friend? Mother-in-law, dear. Did they, did your mother and your mother-in-law make this together?

No, they were growing up. Never met. I thought it was your mom's friend. That shows my listening skills, which I'll be working on. You really are in a good place where you're receiving a lot of- I'm just open to change. I want to grow. I love this. But what I will say is I had two Yuzu lemon drop cocktails at Cheesecake Factory, and I got pretty

tipsy, which was fun. Because also I was there with- Well, I didn't drive. And I was there with both my children who were at the cheesecake factory having, you know, hollies crawling all over the place. And ostensibly you are responsible for them. I am. I mean, I wasn't drunk, but I was, I had two cocktails. And another, other people were with you who could.

There were 10 people there. It takes a village. No, Gigi like threw up mid midway, projectile vomited. That's when I ordered the second one. Okay, it's like, you just start going, I gotta have a good time at least. Like we're sitting here like, okay. That looks yummy.

Yeah. It was crazy. But anyways, so I had to, and then we were leaving, I'm having a pretty fun time. And then Mike and I walked to the car with the kids and he's getting them in the car. And then I got in the car and I, I wearing my big winter coat with like a big hood.

And I like grabbed the car door. And then at the same time, went to put my seatbelt on and my pinky got caught in the car door. No! It closed on my finger. And caught in the car door. No! It closed on my finger. And you didn't break it? No, I literally sat there and went, oh my God, what's happening to me?

I don't know what I said. And then I opened the door and then I was just like, oh my God, I just got that, I got that, I got that. And like, I, it was, I thought it really hurt. And I thought for sure, oh my God, it's gonna blow up and be crazy. And it didn't. And I think it was that thing of when you're kind of drunk

and then like you just are loose. Like I was like, I didn't pull at it or anything. Do you know what I mean? Just looked at it. I honestly was like, oh my God. And I can, there's like a curve in the door frame where like it sat, like it kind of like fit. Maybe they make it, I mean, I don't know.

That's why they tell you when you jump out of an airplane, like have two drinks before, because if your chute doesn't open, then you just bounce. Yeah, you'll be fine, no broken bones. Anyway, it was crazy, and maybe that's not the reason why it didn't get broken. Probably not. But I'm lucky, and it hurts a little still,

but it's just got a tiny bruise, it barely was anything. It was crazy. I'm glad you're okay, because that- It was crazy, I was like, I had a moment of like, oh my God, my finger could have just been so fucked by that. What if it exploded when that happened? I mean, I don't even know,

but I look, well then the next day I got, I was like, I don't know why that'll happen, and the next day I got in the car and I did the same motion. Oh no. I think I just naturally start putting my seatbelt on as the door's closing or something, like I never have thought about it.

But my hood. Don't put on, never put on the seatbelt again as the door's closing or something. Like I never have thought about it. But my hood. Never put on the seatbelt again. I just won't. My hood has fur and I think what happened was I had no peripheral vision and I was just going and it was like a, and I also was not fully. Did you have one of those like classic 80s parkas, like the blue nylon with the fur?

You could zip up into a periscope. I mean, it's practically that. Yeah. You're a fun drunk. Thanks, so are you. You're fun to be tipsy with, yeah. You're great. I only have one thing,

because you were waiting for something. Oh, no, I don't, have, have, have. I think we've been drunk together. Have we? No, Paul and I definitely have, but I mean, I, Tammel Shantar's alone, I'm like. Sure. I mean, you came to a party at my house drunk once.

That's true. I... That was the first time I ever saw you drunk. It was great. I was going through a heart attack. You greeted me, like within seconds, told me an extremely personal thing. It was really, and I just started laughing.

It was really funny. Yeah, I told everyone. Yeah, it was on your mind. Yeah. But yeah, I mean, I mean, we did a whole tour together where we would get a drink after the show sometimes in a bar, you know? Yeah.

But yeah, I don't know. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Are we all reexamining our life choices right now? I'm just thinking. I like having drinks, but I was thinking. You did it, man. Because you don't drink that often, right?

I don't really, no. I mean, like if I go out to dinner, I'll have a drink or something. I don't go out to dinner all the time. I mean, it's just, it's more, I don't usually drink at home. Every once in a while. You step outside to do it on the porch.

Well, that's where I smoke weed. But I'll remember that you can drink a glass of wine at home and I'll go, oh, that could be kind of good. It has to like dawn on me over and over again. I don't think of it as like. I like that with weed, like with gummies and stuff. I always forget about gummies. I forget about Dre sometimes. You have to remember him.

Nowadays motherfuckers are trying to act like they forgot about Dre and it's like, I'm with them. Trying to act like they forgot. Like they got something to say. They remember Dre. Yeah, they all remember Dre. They remember Dre. Yeah.

I'm trying to remember that rap. I remember when Eminem released that album, that first album, and I got it given to me by a kid at school who made copies of it and everything. And I remember listening to it. Piracy? Not Martin Scrooge. Yeah.

I remember being like, oh my God. Like it was so. This is a little much Eminem. It was so wild. It was crazy. And then you were like, I'm gonna improvise exactly like this. I was like, I'm going to improvise exactly like this. I think I'll take this as a word.

By the way, I went to see... I got something to say when nothing comes out, when they move the lips. Just a bunch of gibberish. When the fuck exactly, I forgot about it. I went to see your improvisational show and it was very funny. Oh, thanks. I didn't. I don't think I got a chance to tell you this, because I thought we would do an episode where I would compliment you. I went to see your improvisational show and it was very funny. Oh, thanks. I don't think I got a chance to tell you this

because I thought we would do an episode where I would compliment you. Thanks. I thought it was interesting. Was it the holy shit one? Yes. Oh yeah, thanks. I thought it was a great show.

It was fun. Oh, I still have, sorry, please. It was interesting. I think you were the only woman. I was the only woman. Do you feel, this is a question I wanted to ask and you don't have to answer this on mic if you want. Okay. Because you don't want to. But do you feel when you're the only woman. Do you feel, this is a question I wanted to ask, and you don't have to answer this on mic if you want, if you don't want to, but do you feel when you're

the only woman in an improv show that you get pigeonholed into like being the wife role or, do you know what I'm saying? Well, yeah, there's, well, you know, what's interesting is I think that my feeling about that has changed over the years with I don't even think about it as much anymore. But I did think about it during that show. Because Mary was supposed to be there. And she was sick. But then I but I was like aware of being

the only woman or something. And then I was thinking like, what's fun about it is you actually can do more of it sort of gives me I mean, it's not it's true about it is you actually can do more of, it sort of gives me, I mean, it's not, it's true whenever, this is just, but there is some level of like, thought about gender when you're performing. And there's almost a feeling of being able to be more free. Because it's like, I can do anything. These guys can't do everything, I can do anything. So it's like kind of fun.

It was interesting because like the scene would start and then out of necessity, like a wife would have to come in or whatever because of whatever the scene that was established. But you were coming in and then you were changing the scene to your own ends, which was very funny. I enjoyed, especially I didn't know all those people very well, so that's also really fun

because I'm like, you can't make me do something. I like to kind of just make me do this. Everyone was very funny. No, everyone was great. And I don't think they were trying to make me do something, but there's this feeling of like, I'm not going to play a stereotypical thing because you want this whole film.

But anytime anyone goes like, you know what I mean? Like a scene's already started and someone goes, honey, come in here. Like it has to be you. Yeah, it doesn't have to be. No, it doesn't have to be, but there's an expectation. And I think also the feeling of, if I'm playing a man, well, yeah, I'm happy to, if I'm playing a man, I would still get called she.

Cause I think sometimes people lose track of that, but it's like, I'm clearly being one of the guys in this group here in my mind. But, but, you know, I think when I started improv, I was always the only, I mean, pretty much, except for my teams that were all women, but I think when I started improv, I was always the only, I mean, pretty much, except for my teams that were all women, but there was like, I was, and the house teams that I own and stuff, they'd be like, room for one girl, maybe two. And so like you were-

These guys, we gotta have all these guys. Yeah, yeah. We do have room for one woman. You get used to that, and then there's a sort of, like at that time, competitiveness, that we started like all girl groups to kind of balance that. But there's this feeling of like, oh there's only room for one.

And then you just try to get, just, it gives you, it does give you a freedom of doing whatever you want in some sense. But then over time, that becomes not really a thing anymore. It's much more balanced now, which is great and really fun. I mean, I liked playing with women, but then the- Same. Okay.

Nice. But then, you know, I still do find myself coming home after and analyzing things like that. So there is still some of that. Yeah. Yeah. It didn't really affect the show at all. I just afterwards was kind of like,

oh, I wonder how Lauren feels about this. So thank you for- Yeah, I thought it was really fun. It was a great show. It was a fun show. I was a fun show, thanks. I was laughing my little butt off the entire time. It was fun. And yeah, was happy to be out of the house.

Yeah, it was fun, thanks for coming. What a great review. Well, honestly, sometimes you'd rather be home. Like more movie reviews were like that, like, you know, thank God I got out of the house. It was so great taking a break. I do think, I have watched some things recently and then looked at reviews on them and I'm like,

you know what, I think critics are getting, maybe not getting, maybe they're always this way, but like so harsh where it's like, this is clearly just a fun time. Why? Yeah, right. Some of the things I'm like, I'm watching things, I don't wanna say, cause I don't wanna say, oh, that got bad reviews, but like things that I'm like,

that was so funny. And then someone's like, this piece of shit. I'm like, what did you, it's funny. Well, I think like, this piece of shit. It's funny. Well, I think I think sometimes a critic is like forced to go out of their house and watch something out of theater for their job. Meanwhile, like, you know, parents are like, Oh, thank God I got a house and I just right. I just got to laugh all night. And that's more who the who's watching it, not people who are angry, they have to go watch it. Actually, there was a study and 99% of the movie going population are critics. That's a lot.

That's high. Almost everyone. It's pretty high. Almost everyone. I was surprised. I remember having, I think I had, it was when all of Wild Horses was on Spontaneo Nation and we were talking in like the interview part, we were talking about communicating, when somebody doesn't understand,

doesn't realize what character you're trying to do in an improv scene. And Mary saying that a lot of times when she does, she's trying to do a man, and people interpret it as a confident woman. And there was also a running gag in Superego where anytime, so it started as somebody doing a voice and then someone responding, sir. And then we would just say like I'm a woman yeah and then after a while we just started fucking doing it whenever

probably our biggest catchphrase just sell t-shirts we should have I'm a woman we should have anybody can wear it. Yeah, anyone. Yeah. There are certain moves like that I think a lot of women do to be, to portray boys or men that people- Or boys to men. When they don't get that it's a man, I'm like, you are being willfully obtuse. Like I'm like, that's so clearly what that person is trying to do.

Scratching their dicks. Yeah. No. Scratching their dicks. Unzipping a fly, pulling a penis out. Running one nail down a penis. God. All right, we have to take a break.

What is the size of that shot? Oh. This message is brought to you by ColiGuard, a non-invasive colon cancer screening test. Did you know that colon cancer is considered the most preventable, yet least prevented cancer? When caught at early stages, colon cancer is survivable in 90% of people, so screening and early detection are key to reducing overall colon cancer deaths. That's why the American Cancer Society recommends

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Coligar test performance in adults aged 45 to 49 is estimated based on a large clinical study of patients 50 and older. False positives and false negatives can occur. Coligar is available by prescription only. Hey, everybody. That includes me. And me. Thanks for listening to this week's episode. If you want more of me, Paul and Lauren, and I know you do, you should join us over on Lemonada Premium on Apple Podcasts. That's what it is. Where subscribers get exclusive access to our 3Mium episodes.

In each 3Mium episode, we take your calls and listen to your voicemails and we answer them. You can send your emails to freedomusa.gmail.com, send your voicemail to hadclaims8.com, and listen to your questions. Be answered by your pretzel gang on Lemonade Premium. Subscribe to Lemonade Premium today by clicking on our podcast logo and Apple podcast app and then clicking the subscribe button.

Who's this guy? I don't know, but I like him. Sir, sir, could you please? I think he's a little crab. Hey, Paul. Sorry about that, who was that guy? Someone took your place for a minute. Yeah that little crab and we liked him better Why did that crab do that? And we're back and during the break Paul got a new scam email No, I thought it was a scam, but it's not a scam. It was it was

Somebody from Libsyn hosting yes Liberated syncopation. It's what that stands for that syndication maybe But I forgot It starts out very spammy. We're reaching out with an important update about your iOS app And I was like that's a fucking sound about? But then I forgot we did make a Pod F. Tompkast app. You have an app? You gotta remember these things Paul. This is so long ago and also why would anyone use it? An app that has one podcast?

This is where I get my podcasts. Listen wherever you get your podcasts. The Bud F. Tompkins. So, to ensure your app remains active, you must log into your account and update this by February 17th, 2025. You gonna do it? I don't know. I don't know. Yeah, sometimes it's better to let things just... I have time.

I'm gonna sleep on it. Okay. Yeah. But I was... about this yesterday because she found an article, I think, about like telling seniors to go fuck themselves. Yeah, finally. Thanks for ruining the planet. It's an article.

Like trying to try to... It's an article. Opinion. Seniors should go fuck themselves. Trying to guide them through like how not to get scammed by people in there. And it was like, if you get an email from a supposed suitor using phrases like, I've never felt this way

about anyone before, stuff like these are like stuff that are used in a lot of scams. Yeah, because old people have felt that way before. And then they're like, how, so when, I mean, and I have, my heart goes out to anyone who's fallen for this, but I'm like, do you think that person knows you? What is happening when you're reading that?

Like, you think like they're in love with me? Like, who do you think it is? You think it's a prospective boyfriend that has chatted you up online and- And you forgot. No, no, no, you know you haven't met them yet. Oh, okay. But they're-

You just haven't met them yet. Yes. Hey, Booblake. Michael Booblake. Yes. That song is about scams. Yeah. Yeah. No, it's basically like someone out of the blue

Facebook messages you- Oh, and they're just like, hey, what's up? And then you start talking to them. And then you start talking to them and they develop feelings for you and they say, up? And then you start talking to them. And then you start talking to them and they develop feelings for you. And they say, I've never felt this way about anyone before. And, you know, meanwhile, send me money and all this, you know, I need to get out of this situation.

Anyway, but we were talking about this kind of going like, what are the scams we're gonna fall for in 30 years? Scott, I think about this all the fucking time. What do you think they are? Is it about technology that hasn't been invented yet? Well, it's terrifying to think about this all the fucking time. What do you think they are? Is it about technology that hasn't been invented yet? Well, it's terrifying to think about. Well, it is scary because it's getting, like, AI images and things are just getting better and better.

Where, like, it could be your daughter talking to you in a video. I've read, and I don't, I think these were in reputable news sources, so it wasn't, like, just a, you know, a story I heard that isn't true. But I've heard about people using AI saying like, I'm in jail. I need money.

Yes. Like your daughter. Absolutely. Not with AI, but like that happened with my sister-in-law. She was being, I don't know, people were trying to scam her family with her information, being like, I'm in London and I can't get my money. And like, they were like, what? Like, I mean, those, even that version was like tricking people

before it had a voice attached to it or anything. That's right. I got a call from somebody who was like, we had a baby, he's a boy. Man, I think about that commercial like every week. I wish I didn't. Anyway, watch out for scams. I think if that's one thing we can impart.

I'd give anything for it to go away. If we can impart anything to our listeners, our piss pigs out there, don't fall for scams. Yeah, that's great advice. If somebody's trying to scam you, don't fall for it. I do think that one of the important things is to slow down. I always tell my mom, like, slow down,

and then I'll say, read it out loud. Here's the other thing. And then you're like, oh, that doesn't make any sense. If there's a, if an email comes to you that you're like, is this a scam? Literally Google whatever the thing in the email is. And there will be a, like a lot of webpages devoted to yes, this is a scam. Do not do this. Nice setup by the way.

Nice setup by the way. They got you though. They sent me that video. No, they did. No! And she loves it. I never was going to tell you but what if that bring it up it's a good movie where it's actually real the scammer does send the video but that everybody loves like this really

humanized you for me yeah I was kind kind of intimidated, but now I see you're just like a regular person. Well, Paul, before we continue on with scams, I did wanna ask you a question. Sure, I'm an open book. What's happening? What's? It's time for- Go back to sleep.

It's time for a three-cher, but I don't know what one is. Oh, I don't know what one is either. You guys, I'm delighted to get this query because I do know what a threacher is. You know what one is? Oh yes, I do. Okay. And I'm about to tell you.

A threacher, you see, is a game that we like to play, AKA, un bustero. Bustero. Bustero. A creature is a game we like to play. It's also known as un Bustero. I see. Okay, that clears it all up for me. I have no more questions.

Yeah, okay. We have a Bustero today? We do, and this one is called Taboo Word. And this was played on our episode Squish Factor. Oh sure. According to the Freedom Wiki. I didn't know we had a Freedom Wiki, but apparently we do.

A, I'm surprised we've played this because I don't remember playing this. And B, Squish Factor, I don't remember either. You don't remember Squish Factor? No. This is two of us decide on a taboo word. And then the third player suggests household item to start a scene. The two players that know the taboo word try to get the third

player to say it. You by any means necessary. By any means. Yeah. At gunpoint. Whatever we need to do. Waterboarding. Yeah at gunpoint So who wants to be the taboo word in chargers Oh Paul and I what if you told me again what the rules are we we know okay? But you if it's you and me we know a taboo word and you're trying to get me to say it trying to get Lauren. Yes Yes

Okay, and then somehow a household object is you have to say it. Trying to get Lauren to say it. Yes. Yes. Okay. And then somehow a household object is what starts. You have to think of that. And it has to be that. Yep. But she has to think of it, do we have to guess what that is or no? No, I'm just gonna show her the scene.

She's responsible for beginning the scene with a household object. I will do that. Okay. That I can handle. Texting you the taboo word. If you agree, then Lauren will start the scene. Love it.

Okay. I agree. God, the sponge is so musty. What happened do you think? I think I just used it too much. I think I should, well, I guess I'll just put it in the dishwasher. Does that work?

I don't know. I don't know if I would do that because it's sort of like then everything that's been on that sponge will sort of permeate the dishwasher. You're right. And then everything will have like the. The sort of. But you shouldn't say quah.

It's by the way, it's called a dishwasher, not a sponge washer. Oh, whoa. Yeah, because I've been working on my insults when you that's a good one. It's not bad. Thank you so much. When you boil it, I'm hurt like to boil it down when you're thinking about the function of the dishwasher. Yeah.

What ultimately is its? Goal? Essence? Object? Oh, hey, we got it. Essence. We did it. We did it. Do I want to say it? No.

Okay. If you can go the whole scene without saying it, then you win. I win a point. Okay, great. I will do that differently next time. Okay, yeah. Great. Okay.

And that will affect our trying to lead you into it as well. Okay, well. Not being as obvious about it probably. I would like to be on the other side of the coin. Okay, great. Who do you wanna? I'm gonna send Scott a word. Okay.

And then Paul, think of that household object as hard as you can. Household object, household object. Now this is anything that's in your house that never leaves the house. Okay. Great. We agree. What if you said no?

Hey guys, come on in. You can just sit right there on the sofa. Oh, thanks. Gosh. This is great. Oh, this is comfy. Thank you. This is like, I mean, it's really soft.

Like I'm falling into it a little bit. Thanks for having us. I love to see you guys. It's been too long. We love seeing you, Sharon. Where'd you get this sofa? Where'd I get the sofa from the store? I mean, yeah, I assumed you got it at a store.

What store? Mervins. Okay. Do they sell sofas now? They sell one sofa. It's this one. You got the one sofa? They sell clothes and they sell one.

Did you pay a million dollars for it? I did pay a million dollars. It's designed by the Wu-Tang Clan. Sharon, you sometimes just spend your money so fast. Yeah. Well, I like to live life. You throw away your money. Yeah, it's, you're always life. You throw away your money. Yeah.

It's just always just tossing it out the window. I don't think so. I think I just know how to live life. You can't take it with you. Well, but a million dollars on a couch seems kind of like a waste. Well when you're a billionaire, it's not that much money. Do you have a bathroom? Of course I do.

Do you have seven? I have six. Is that okay? Can I find one? Cause I need to. Yes, go down the hall and to the right. And then straight on till morning. I need to do it a little earlier than that. He's gotta go pee pee.

I'm saying you can use it until morning. Yeah. I gotta take my main vein and. Do what with it? You know. You have to take my main vein and... And do what with it? You know. You have to take your main veins. Sure, sure.

I have to take them out. That's the old saying goes. I don't know. I have disease control of my main veins. He's not good at sayings. Do you know that one? Do I know what one? He's not good at saying things?

That saying that he's saying. That expression? Yeah. I suppose I do after a fashion. After a fashion. Anyway, I'll be right back. Okay. Oh, he's on a little horse.

He's a little horse and he's got little high heels on. So it's kind of a combination. Well, this is, you know, this is so lovely. It's been months since we've seen you. I know. It's so great to see you again. I've just been busy. I'm so sorry.

Sheila, is that your name? Sharon. Sharon. Sharon! Go for Sharon. Your, your, your sink is clogged up. Bye. Oh, I don't want to say. Well, there should be a plunger in there.

You can plunge a sink. Does plunging work on a sink? You can plunge a sink. Really? Yeah. You can try. You can, wait, wait, wait. Start there before I have to get out the snake.

Yeah, can you get out the snake? Cause I did try and it didn't work. All right. I'm get out the snake. Yeah, can you get out the snake? Because I did try and it didn't work. All right, I'm coming with the snake. Where are you going to put it? Into the sink. That's a real snake. You just let a snake sit in the sink. I thought you meant a plumber snake.

And the hair gets out. You're just going to toss that snake? This snake loves hair. OK. It'll go right down the, ooh, there he goes. Down where? Down the drain. Yay!

Did you know that? No! Oh, wow! I thought it had something to do with being bad with money. Drain the main vein. Well, we were saying throwing your money down the drain is how we first tried. Yeah.

Drain the main vein. Throwing your money down the drain is how we first tried. Yeah. Okay. Now it's your chance to send Lauren a word. This is my chance. This is your chance. Don't miss this chance. Um, let's see. Do you accept? Yep.

Okay. Did any of you guys lose an apple core? Oh, okay. Sorry. I was going to say usually apple cores I try to throw out. I did lose one though. You lost an apple core? I was trying to throw it out, yeah.

Did you, I mean, did you lose the corer that got it out of there? No, no, no, I ate all around it. Did you lose the corer? I didn't, no, I didn't lose the corer. Because I have a fifth corer here and I only own four. Oh. So this is near you guys? Why do you have four apple cores? Because I have a fifth corer here and I only own four. Oh, um... So this is near you guys?

Why do you have four apple corers? Sometimes I like to eat four apples. Okay, um, look, it's the Super Bowl party, I don't think we need so many apples, let's not worry about it. Touchdown! You made me miss a touchdown! Oh my god, he was watching you! We were arguing about apple corers. He watched it while we were sitting here arguing. Oh, I've never seen one like that.

Rewind it. What made it so different? He threw the ball from one end zone into the other end zone. Past the guac. That's 103 yards. Past the guac. Past the guac. All right, honey.

Here. Okay, thanks. Do you need anything with that? Sure. What do you have? I have assorted groceries in the cupboard. Assorted groceries? I'll dip a strawberry in it.

Sure, enjoy yourself. Fucking idiot. I'll have some Lunchables. Anyway, so thanks for- These are good chips. Are these tortilla chips? Yeah. Do you have any Doritos?

It's a Mexican snack. I do. They're in the pantry. Which flavors do you have? Cool Ranch. Okay. Nacho. Yeah! I was trying to say as many flavors as I could

without whatever one you picked. Without going over. Yes. You did it. You did it. Oh, I just remember there's Doritos in my home right now. Yum. Because I love snacks last night.

Oh, lucky. Yum. The Dough Boys talked about a new Doritos flavor that I can't remember what it was right now. Why do the Dough Boys have me on in a while? I don't know. I think they're worried that you are too busy about a new Doritos flavor that I can't remember what it was right now. Why do the Doughboys have me on in a while? I don't know.

I think they're worried that you are too busy. I've heard it told that they might be piss pigs or at least Weiger might be. I've heard that too. And let me tell you this. Here's a story about the Doughboys. I was listening to an episode and I'm trying to remember who all their guest was, but I realized, but it was somebody that I knew as well. And so I texted Mitch and Nick and the guest

to say a funny thing. And then nobody wrote back to me. And I was like, what the fuck? Yeah, Mitch did this to me recently as described on Scott hasn't seen. Here's what happened though. What? I have another Mike Mitchell in my phone.

Oh no, so do I. So I went to this person. I think I have three. And then he wrote back and said, I'm not that Mitch. It ain't me, babe. I was like, oops. But Weiger? Weiger never responded. And maybe he figured it, he was also a mistake

because he saw the other address was a mistake. That's crazy. Yeah, that's true. It was just a coincidence I was referencing something on Doughboys with the guest they had on the show. Yeah. Wow. I guess he just didn't care.

That's the conclusion I came to. And then, of course, I was mortified. I was embarrassed and felt stupid. Oh, I'm sorry. Well guys, you know what I don't feel stupid about is spending this time with you all. Same, it was great. It was great to have you back, Lauren.

I love to be back. Yes, welcome back to Los Angeles. And what do we need to tell everyone? Follow us on socials at FreedomUSA. Yeah. If you want to leave us a voicemail, there's a great website. Follow us on socials at FreedomUSA. If you want to leave us a voicemail, there's a great website. HagClaims8.com.

Oh my God, I love that website. Such a good website. I love your app. I go every day. Yeah. I love that website. Should we get a HagClaims8 app? Sure.

I think it's been announced. And then we'll get a notification in 20 years that we have to update us. Switch your app into being an app for that. Hey, why not? Why not? It just has one button on it. Same icon though on the home screen.

Right. Can we plug South by Southwest? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's been announced that I'll be there. Yeah, we'll be at South by Southwest. Sorry. Paul's busy. We wanted you to be there.

We wanted Paul to be there and we were gonna do a live three of them, but Paul can't go. You said no. Daddy said no. I wanted to see how it felt to be the one to shut it down. Yeah, I know. But yeah, we're gonna be doing Comedy Bang Bang and Lauren and some other special guests are gonna be on the show.

And I might do other shows, TBD. Yeah. Come to that one. Come to comedy shows at South by Southwest. This is in March, somewhere around. March 8th, 9th, 7th, 8th, 9th, to comedy shows at South by Southwest. This is in March Somewhere March 8th, 9th 7th, 8th, something like that something like that and I'm gonna be on the the Joko cruise Yes, that's where I'm gonna be. Yes and Paul right. Oh, that cruise Riotopia tour begins in April, but sooner than that we're doing our third annual

April, but sooner than that, we're doing our third annual, um, St. Patrick's day show Sunday, March 16th, 7 PM Pacific. It's at Lodge Room in Highland Park and it's going to be live streamed. Of course. I feel like the years are going faster and faster. This week went so quickly. I hated it. Yeah. Anyway, see you next time. Yeah. I hated it. Yeah. Anyway. Bleh. See you next time.

Bye. Hi everyone, Gloria Riviera here, and we are back for another season of No One Is Coming to Save Us, a podcast about America's childcare crisis. This season, we're delving deep into five critical issues facing our country through the lens of child care. Poverty, mental health, housing, climate change, and the public school system. By exploring these connections, we aim to highlight

that child care is not an isolated issue, but one that influences all facets of American life. Season four of No One is Coming to Save Us is out now wherever you get your podcasts. Are you in bed by 10? Can you feel your hormones raging more than ever? Do you wake up every day wondering, is this it? Guess what? You're not alone. Welcome to My Soul Called Midlife,

a weekly podcast hosted by me, Reshma Sajjani. On this show, we're going to expose the con we've been sold about middle-age, figure out what the fuck we want from our lives, and how to get there. We'll have help from guests like Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Supreme Court Justice Katanji Brown Jackson, and Alana Glazer. You can listen to My Soul Called Midlife ad-free on Amazon Music.