TigerBelly - Are You Garbage w/ Kevin Ryan & H. Foley

Episode Date: November 5, 2025

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And I'm Jaime Garcia. And this is the Bobby and Jaime Garcia show. And I'm Kalila. I don't know how to your voice. I'm Caliva The testosterone in my veins is pumping I break the mouth Are you still in the Hawaiian stuff?

Yeah He knew that he was I told him he was coming so I didn't know he was coming You said you're Hi How are you? How are you?

Hi How are you? Just those two seats right there If you want to see again man You're a new papa right? Yes Congratulations Thank you.

Thank you. What do you want us? I think he's in the middle. I love it over there. It's cozy. Who plays the piano? Would you ever sit in the middle seat in the airplane? Me?

I have an uncle that's one. I've ruined a couple of flights. Sure. Yeah. Here, Hemet. I look this way. How's Hyman here? Move more.

Am I good here? This is cozy. It was rough. Good. Yeah? You live here? No, I live with Ralph. I just come out here for work.

How many days you have to come out here? Like four days. A week? A week? Yeah, four days a week. Oh, he missed a couple days. I come here four days a week, and this is the whole month. I come here four days a week when I do come, if I come.

Yeah, Ralph's just a house playing with his girlfriend and playing with his cars and stuff. Playing with his girlfriend. Do you live with Ralph? He's in love. He's got a new girlfriend. He's got a new girl, and he's in love, okay? I should understand the verbiage. Wait, what?

This is this me? Hey, Bobby. How faggots? Whoa. Hey. Riyod, baby. Riyon, let's go. You're in the house of Lee now, baby.

You look, you fat faggit. Whoa. Oh, I'm sorry, I got her losing weight. You look fantastic. Your eyes, though? I said tell you this right now. Thanks, bud. No, it's not a good thing.

Okay. Round eye. G.I. Yeah. Is it Sunfaku eyes? You do, you do. What's that? The floating iris.

Yeah. I don't know what it is. You ever the floating iris? Billy Elish eye. You know what that cans? I'm going to put the can't, Tom. Since when do you play the piano? I never.

Asians are born this way. Do you know that? I did not. Now I do. Asians are born with certain abilities. Mm-hmm. You can't play the piano. What are you talking?

We're watching in play. We're born with ninjitsu, Taekwondoish skills. But it depends on what house you're from. I'm from the house of Lee. We're good at Abacus. Was your brother a good student in school? And did he go to college?

What the fuck are you asking shit about my brother for? Huh? Yeah. Age Foley? Because you said you were a bad student and you didn't go to college. I'm so sorry. I assume that's harder on a Korean family.

Yeah. It was very hard for a Korean family. The whole family. Yeah. Where's that? Your eyes are spooky. Okay. I mean, you complimented them before, and now you're saying they're spooky.

They're not spooky. They're so round and beautiful. Oh, thank you. You think so? Let me see. I got good eyes. Yeah. Not much else, but good eyes.

But you're, like, you're a white, the type of white you are, white devil. I call it evergreen white. In what sense? Why? It's very average white. It's always been this case. Hit me. Where's my guy?

What do you mean? In terms of, like, what I'm saying is that Paul Revere or fucked with people that look like you. I don't think so, man. Right down the middle. You're right down the middle of white, which is great. Now we're talking. He's modern white. He's awesome. What? Modern white. They didn't look like that back then. No, if you change his hair style, he'd be a baker in the like 1940s.

The 40s? Yeah, yeah. Forties I'll give you. Yeah, yeah. You were there too in the fucking 40s, probably. No. Yeah, yeah. No. When would you, you be a welder? In the 40s? Yeah. Be a tail gunner. B-29. Teach me everything. Tail gunner, B-29. Memphis Bell. dropping bombs He's big in the military

So you're back in the plane shooting I'm back in the plane shooting So how much weight has to be in the front For you be in the back? 40 guys in the front guys Obviously I wouldn't have this weight I mean because there'd be no Saturated fats and all that stuff

It'd be good stuff You know an apple in the 1950s You have to eat five apples To equal that nutrition I know and you know what And four Big Macs Same Big Macs Yeah

Did you sleep all right last night? slept good Yeah Great Back to the house Did another pod Took a dip Had a couple of beers

A couple of beers Uh huh Yeah Yeah nice How have you been doing Are you coming back and forth Between Hawaii as well Not

Not lately Because I just had a baby Congratulations by the Thank you Thank you Thank you Congratulations to you Congratulations

Yeah You know babies are interesting Sure Babies are interested Yeah I like when they go Google Gaga When they say

Something Google Gaga Who said that? Me. I said that. Most people go Gaga, Gougu, but you want Google Gaga. Oh, it's Gougu Gaga.

I think it's Gugauga. I think it's Gugauga. What do you think of this? Let me do it. Gaga Guga Guga Guga Guga. Guga. I got to go Gugauga. I'm going to go Gugauga.

Yeah. If they offered you, look, who's talking. Would you do it? A reboot? Yes. Yeah, dude. I'm talking. It's a white baby, but it's a Korean place.

I would do the accent, you know what? Speaking of that, you know what blew my mind the other day? I saw a clip of Pat Moriarty. You know who he is? Pat Marita? Pat Marita, sorry. Pat Reirty. He sells cars outside of Philly.

Wait, wait, is that Sherlock Holmes? That's Sherlock Holmes. It's Sherlock's Homes enemy from Japan. Wow, really? Is that really who it was? And Pat Moriardi. That was Sherlock Holmes enemy? Moriarty.

Moriarty is, right? I just thought it was opium. Yeah, yeah. Moriarty. Oh. Yeah, Moriarty was his nemesis. Anyway, you saw Pat Moriarty where... He's a ghost.

No, I saw him on a clip. It was like Battle of the Network stars. Yeah. He died. He died. I know. Oh, yeah, of course he's an American. I didn't know that.

He killed that accent. Oh, he did. He killed it. He was in Happy Days. Of course. He was Arnold. But he also had an Asian accent and that. Oh, he did.

Yeah, but back then you had to do it. You had to. They weren't casting that guy as a guy from Cleveland. That guy had to be from another country. Walking in the 50s? Have you ever met him? No, he died before my time, but... You don't know him?

I don't know if he's shocked that he just never crossed paths or he thinks you guys all know each other. I want to say something to you. Please. Okay, both of you. I love you. Thanks for being here. Of course. We're happy.

Thanks for a lot. You know Roy Choi. You know David Chang. Yeah, I do. Allie Wong. I do. James Moriarty. Yeah.

Gary Moriarty. What I'm saying is that in these days, you have gatherings. We have Asian Excellence Award. We have the Golden Rod. What is that thing? The Golden Gala. The Golden Gala sets where the Asians gather.

So yes, I meet them there. You meet them there. Have you ever won a Golden Dumpling? That was my nickname in high school. There you go. That's all right. But, yeah, so we, so if Pat was still alive, I'm 100%. You would have crossed pads.

Well, he would have done this podcast. For sure. Because I was, I know, you know, Asian actors tend to help each other. Like you said, like you even have comics and stuff that you work with. Did you know Steve McQueen? Yeah. I did. I did.

I was actually in Bullitt. Oh, you were, yeah. You were the bullet. I was the car. Oh, you're the car. My bad. Yeah, I don't know. What Asians do I not know?

the Asian mafia is pretty close-knit so I think everyone knows everyone Yeah we have an ill-a Am I a part of the mafia? Yeah, come on, dude Hello Do you know the actress Suki? Hello

Suki? Oh wait you don't know you don't know Peggy Goo She's like Gougu Gaga High-end Asian DJ, yeah look her up DJ?

Yeah That's not a that's not really No but she is very like socialite cool girls Just like pull up a picture Yeah, but did she live in... H. Fuller's going to go crazy. Oh, wow. She's very...

Oh, she's perfect for me, Dad. What are you? At a store? Hey, what's her name? Peggy Goo? She's an international superstar, but she... Peggy Goo? I'm international, too, Peggy Goo. You ever see the Indian dudes in Bollywood? How big those guys are? Yes. What's the guy's name, Shaka Khan or something like that?

Shaka Khan, you... George was a Hollywood director. Really? Yeah. Oh, wow. Did you live over there? I lived over there for a year after college. I lived over there for a year.

Sounds like you're really blended in. Where can I get some chicken chicken masala? No, no. Hey, you're going to wash your hands, buddy? I had to start doing the accent so they would understand me. Sure. We have to change your voice now. What is that voice?

You get we get weirder every time we come. I feel like that's he. He didn't just greet me with that voice. He took a hard gear. He were wearing a suit the last time we were here. Oh, that's right. The suit era. The suit era.

Is that over? Sorry. Yeah. Now he's doing like, I'm Namaste Stephen Saga, Hawaii vines. I like the glasses. Yeah, that looks good. Yeah, good.

Yeah, good. That's great. So, you were there for how long? A year. A year. How many movies do you make? I was fourth assistant director on Musafir. That's not directing.

A big pop boiler. That's not directing. Oh, I got it wrong. Wait, fourth assistant director? Yeah, that's a PA. I don't want to say anything. Clarified, D. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

He's a gopher. But, wow, so you, where did you stay in India? In Juhu, Juhu Beach. It's a very filmy part of it, Bombay. Juhu Beach. Did you want to get into that? Is that why you went there?

No, I... Did you get kidnapped? Kev, Kev, why you're so aggressive? I'm just shocked. Yeah, round eye, take it easy. How do you grow up, like, you're a seven-day Adventist, right? I went to film school at University of Michigan, and they came over.

What's the seven-day Adventist? They're the ones. What are you reading, by the way? You know all these things. Very educational. It's like a lot of Filipinos are seven-day Adventists. Well, they're the ones that are... You're Filipino?

Like footloose. You can't dance. Whoa, you can't drink coffee. They don't... You're vegetarian, right? Yeah. Kind of like Mormons, but we worship on the holy seventh day.

You're Filipino? Fucking guys all over the place. I'm Filipino. I'm an indie in Filipino. I live in Juhu Beach. Yeah. Wait, Kev, you didn't know that she was Filipino? No, I knew she was Filipino.

Yeah. Oh, okay. He said... I thought you looked at her again. You're Filipino? No, no, no. She was explaining the religion, and she said a lot of Filipinos are.

I thought most Filipinos were Catholic. Yeah, Filipinos, largely Catholic. The whole south of it is Muslim. And then, I don't know, a lot of, like... Filipino Americans, SDA, for sure. A lot of SDA, yeah. What the fuck is that? Seven-day Adventist.

Give me a favor. I had a long week. Seven-day advocates. Yeah. Is that something with Mormons or something? Similar. Similar. It's similar.

Yeah, yeah. George, are we misrepresenting the religion? Oh, no, it came out of like 1844, like the late 1800s. There was a revival of Christianity in America. Yeah. And it came out of that whole movement. Are you still, do you still practice a lot? No, because you'd have to, like, go to church on Sabbath, on Saturday.

Okay. Because they're going back to the Jesus' religion. Okay. You know, the real stuff, because, you know, the Pope is the Antichrist because he changed the seventh day. You know, if you're ready for the end of the world, I can tell you how to avoid it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, we really want to know. I know all about relations.

Like, you believe in the rapture? This is what you were raised in? Yeah. Okay. I want to know. I want to know. What do I do? Well, the Pope's the Antichrist because he changed the Holy Sabbath Day to Sunday.

Whoa. Who is a manned? Bastrodizing God's rules, okay? So the mark of the beast is actually worshipping on Sunday. Oh. So when the end of the world comes, you know, to get saved, you got to just worship on Saturday. If you didn't have a microphone, they were on the street, people would think you're crazy saying all that. Which I respect.

Yeah. So if I went on Saturday's church and stuff, but I didn't believe in God, am I good? Um, halfway there. Halfway there. I'm halfway there. You're going to listen to this guy? What is that? That's their leader.

That's their like, uh, Joseph Smith. I wouldn't you what. It's a woman. Yeah. That's pretty progressive for back then. Sure. That's great. That's great.

Wow. Not a lot of titty on that. Do you handsome woman? Let's pause for that. Let's pause for that. reflect. Not a lot of tidies on that. You're talking shit about the Pope. You're back in LNG white.

LNG That garb seems so hot. That must have to do every individual button. Look at that. Those aren't crazy. You got to make all that shit. Yeah, yeah. But those aren't snap-ons. You have to go, every morning, oh, good morning. Imagine being half drunk trying to make a move on her.

Isn't the lore around like petticoats? You know when women had like multiple layers of clothing and the skirts. Apparently that was because it was like the era of like venereal disease and it would mask the smell of the venereal disease. God damn. I don't know if that's just the lore. I don't know if that's actually true, but. Oh, you could smell syphilis? You could smell anything. After a while, yeah. It sounds like syrup. Yeah. Canadian syrup. Can you tell if I smell gonorrhea and then syphilis, would I be able to know the difference? This one's tangier. This is syphilis. This one has more

oud, you know, like an oudy is actually not, gonorrhea would probably smell more because it's like a bacterial thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Cephalis is like a long progression, like a chronic sickness. Hi man. Do you have any diseases? No, man, but sure about that? You've never had.

You have to, um, you have to praise this woman or what? And we're not shit. We're not shit. You mean? You mean a praise her? Like, she's property? What do you mean? We're not shit. Oh, praise her. Oh, like, bow down her and pray to her. Yeah. Yeah, I don't think so, dude. It's not the way they do, right?

You just read all of her books. She wrote The Great Controversy, which is all about the big war in heaven that's happening right now. Right. Oh, wow. Between the good and bad angels. There's a war in heaven?

Yeah. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Who's fighting? Who's fighting up there? Well, the good man. Santa versus Moses? Like, what is it? Red versus blue?

Moses drops back, passes the Moses. So they don't think all that stuff happened in the beginning of time. The fallen angels and all that stuff. Oh, no. Just wait, which ones? Because why is the devil up there? Shouldn't he be down there in hell?

Why is he beefing with... I don't remember. It's a long book, and I've tried a long time. I skimmed through it once. He has an all-access pass, I think. Don't you think? Pass, pass. Don't think he has a pass to get up there?

The devil? Yeah. Because he's an ex-angel, right? He's an angel. Yeah. You guys are, I'm out of my depth on this one. Yeah. You really?

What about dinosaurs? He didn't believe in this. Not religious. I either. Me neither. Well, dinosaurs, actually, Dinosaur Bob came to my grade school. In fifth grade, I learned that dinosaurs were created during the flood. And, you know, why you have different stratas of, like, dinosaurs is because the fast dinosaurs could run to the top of the hill. And that's why every dinosaur is at a different era. Like, so they're

really, like, the amoebas are at the bottom, and then they got filled in with the flood. They got drowned. And then you have, like, every little, like, so, like, yeah. Right on. Bobby, why you play this song? Thank you, Mr. Spreeball. Dinosaurs Um Yeah Really

Interesting Do you believe this or you're just H? Don't don't Okay Yeah Yeah Don't ton him

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Okay. Plenty. Yeah, not as big as Andrew Santino in my house, but, you know what I mean? Pretty good. Yeah. A couple of rooms. All my rooms have beds.

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Helixleep.com slash belly. Oh, yeah. This segment is presented by a cash app. The other day I was online, maybe a couple weeks ago. So maybe two weeks ago. And I, you know, I like to buy cologne. A lot. But, you know, buying cologne online is crazy.

because you're not smelling it. I've seen you in action. Oh, blind purchase. Yeah, you're blinding it and you're reading the description. It says like, oaky, foresty, but also with a floral scent. You know what I mean? With a little bit of lavender and, um, oud. And you think, I think I'm pretty sure I'd like this.

You think you, you go, and then it comes, and you spray it. You disappoint. Yeah, and you spill like a Hungarian gulag. Yeah. So, Colilo, do you have any items that you've purchased? I'm a little bit more of a careful shopper, but I would say one. Wow, shots fired. One of my more recent ones, I think just because, like, as, like, a mom, you want to buy everything all the time for your kid.

Like, dumb stuff at, like, three in the morning. Yeah. So most of my. Like, what, a rattler? Like, for instance, right? You're like, oh, he likes. Three in the morning, you're bringing a rattler. Not a rattler.

Like, you're like, oh, he's like, he probably doesn't need one for like a couple years, but let's buy him a whole kitchen set. Oh, God. Why? I don't know, because he's going to be a culinary genius? But it's that type of stuff at 2 a.m. when you're like, oh, I've now spent a grand. How about Samo and baby socks? I mean, he's a pretty big. Got big feet?

Big feet. He does have big feet. Yeah, yeah. No. That's what I would do if I were you. So not worth it. Not worth it. I think always worth it because for the memories.

for the memories and just for the silliness of it all. Hi, May. I go to websites every now and then and... What kind? Just websites where they sell stuff. What kind of stuff? Why are you saying it this way? That sounds so shady.

I bought some... Are you trying to say mahogany? Mahogany. Mahogany wood. You just got like eight by five pieces of wood? Mahogany. Four by five. And what are you going to make?

A hut. Okay, okay. I get it. That's the... If you're going to make... Big a hot, mahogany is the root word. Yeah, it is. Was it worth it or not? I haven't got it, but I think it is.

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So there's levels to the dinosaurs, fossils, I'm very sorry. Well, yeah, the fast ones. Okay, good, good. I fucked up. That's why you have, like, bigger dinosaurs at the end, at the top. Yeah. Top of what? Like, the stratas of, like, the era is, like, you know, like, there was.

Like where you find the fossil? Yeah. So if you dig deep enough, there's like older. The old fat dinosaurs. Oh, there's little tiny ones, you know? Oh, there's a little tiny ones. Oh, cute. Yeah.

You know those tiny T-Rexes? So cute. Yeah, they're adorable. So the franchise of Jurassic Park. Okay. Is that any relation to this? She wrote that book. Yeah.

The Jurassic Park is factual. It's from by Ellen Gould. Yeah. By that white lady. Yeah, very good. And it's Steven Spielberg. Yeah. Have you ever met Mexicans before?

What's up? Yeah. No, I'm asking these guys. Yeah, they have. Yeah. Well, you're from the East Coast, more Puerto Ricans. It's more Dominican, more Puerto Rican. Yeah, yeah.

Got it all, baby. You live in Queens, the most diverse place on the planet. Yeah. Whoa. No dinosaurs, though. No, yeah. Queen. You both live in Queens?

Nah, I live in Manhattan. Manhattan. Do you guys see each other outside of work? Hmm. Touchy subject. I mean, because, let me say something. People seem to think that me and Andrew hang out all the time, but no, it's mostly work? Sure. Sure. Yeah.

We work a lot, though. That's not true. We all hang out. Yeah, that's true. This podcast hangs out. We hang out more, I think. Yeah. You guys all go out together. Yeah, we just talked about family functions and stuff. Family function. Family function. Like, well, she had her. My baby's birthday. Okay. Everybody went to that. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I went. What about, George didn't go. Everyone was invited. We're all invited. Do you guys go? Gilbert didn't go. Alex went. Why didn't you guys go? I was in Torrance. Oh, pretty far.

Pretty far away. What about you, George? I was sick. I can't go out on Wednesdays. I'm teasing you, George. I'm sorry. So you guys don't. I feel like he's getting mad.

He's going to murder you. On the seventh day, you will go ahead. But you guys don't, then. No, we do. We'll go to a game. We'll catch a dinner. You know, but we see each other. When we see each other, he's got the baby and, you know.

We also work like three or four days a week together. So it's like we're together a lot You know what I mean So it's not like we're just like meeting And I'm a lot Sure It's not like we're meeting up like once a week We'll get beers or something

Yeah So you do spots You know yeah Are you the more Because in my relationship with Andrew He's the responsible one Yeah So you're the responsible one

We touch this little bit You're the so you take on He's Abraham Lincoln All right So you take on What how many percentage of the work Do you take on Outside of the show?

No, just in the show. 90%. Yeah, a lot of the work. A lot of the business. Every bit of our success was engineered by Kevin Ryan. Yeah. And I'll be honest. And I'm saying this.

Okay. This is fact. I think we've gotten far enough now into the podcast there. This is fact. Nobody did what this guy did. Hey. Nobody did. No.

From nothing. We weren't famous before. Yeah. Engineered every strategy. One of the best patrons. One of the best. We got a big fight before we came over here. One of the best, like...

Huge cock. Huge cock. No, that is our... First of all, for the listener, we're on day 10 of a trip. So it's just where, you know, we've been living together, just tensions are high.

Please, please, please, please tell me what the fight was about. Please, please, please. No one incident, just... I know, but that's what I can tell. Because I know that Andrew, right, you build resentment, right? Do you guys get in fights, fights, fights? Oh, yeah.

Now you do? Oh, yeah. Because I remember we were in Austin together, and we were in the car and you're like, do you fight? Do you guys fight? We're like, we're also wildly just, we come from broken dysfunctional family. Yeah, so normal for us. So do we?

Yeah, yeah. So it's like, it's not great, you know, it's like we just blow up and then fucking move on. Yeah, so what was the fight about earlier? There was a lot of stuff going. A lot of stuff going on. You know a little bit of it. Okay, aside from that. Is it, is it resent?

Am I wrong here? No. But then if they talk about it, you have to talk about your fights. The real one, in London. Oh, London. And we'll lead with L.A. What's your problem, Bubby? All right, you guys go first, and then I will go.

Da-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na. I had a rough summer, and I put a lot of stress on the boys. I see. Yeah. It was just, and listen, we've been together for 10-day. But that's not why I said that. He really did engineer, like, just crazy things. We understand what you were trying to do.

No. Yeah, yeah, because that's what I do. What you do is stuff that I've done, okay? Yeah. I don't know how have you guys been friends? Yeah, 15 years. Where the fuck did you go? I know, yeah.

I thought they piped that in from the outside. What are you that? School newspaper? So what do you guys like to do in your free time? We've been friends since we started comedy. We started around 2008, 2009, and Philly. Ravenland. Or I'll go first then.

That's it. And then you go. No, that's really it. Oh, so there was no like, when you guys fight, there's no screaming. Of course. Of course. Of course. We're fucking dysfunctional.

Today it was a little different. I, you know, I've been putting the boys under a lot of stress. And it kind of, you know, peaked. Came out. Right. Yeah. Would you take on some more workload so that resentment doesn't build up? It's not that.

It's not the workload. It's not the workload. Okay. Okay. He wouldn't want me doing this. Can I be honest with you? Yes, please. That was a nothing burger. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Your thing was a nothing burger and now I have to do my big big thing at London. That's not fair. Yeah, right? Yeah, you didn't give me enough. Yeah, you didn't get enough. I don't think you should talk about that. Because there really isn't anything. There really isn't.

Because the London is juicy. It's too juicy. Then hit us. Yeah. No. Why? Ours wasn't juicy enough. Yeah, yeah.

It's not tit for tat. You see this. Give me juicy. I'll give you juice. Okay. Let's juice it out, dude. It's this, honest, this one wasn't, it wasn't that juicy. It was, we had a bit of a snafu with doing a Patreon episode.

Okay. We were like, okay, we have to scrap it and can't use it. That's all. I've been fucking up all summer. I had a bad summer. Yeah. And I've been driving these guys crazy. Yeah, depression, anxiety, mental illness, personal stuff, you know, and I've been wearing it.

2025 has been fucked for a lot of people. I hear you. It's been rough there. I hear you. It's okay, man. Ralph screams that man. Get off of me. Who invited this guy?

Ralph screams at you? Yeah, sometimes. Yeah. Well, your dynamic is different then because he's best friends with Ralph Boboza. Yeah, yeah, I love Ralph. Of course. And they grew up together as kids.

Yeah, that's a little deft's like 20 plus years. Yeah, yeah. Not to brag. I think you just did. You better hang on to him like grim death. I love that, dude. By the way, speaking of Ralph, I've said this the other day, a bit of a glow-up as far as his look.

He's got the hair long... I agree. He looks like a fucking movie star. Yeah, he does. And let me tell you something. Action buddy cop movie, a couple of years. Cam Patterson, Ralph Barbosa. Oh, yeah.

Right? Yeah. Right? Are you a casting director? I love it. No. But I'd like to have you play the sergeant. I'll be the sergeant in the movie.

You'll be the angry, you'll be the angry, you know... I don't know if Sergeant Talk. Let me let me give a try. Allie, up, up! Allie you? What are you, a basketball coach? I don't know. The cops.

Right, did they say that? No. Have you never played a cop? Get in line. The cop, Bobby, cop on the military. You're due lieutenant. Oh, really? I thought it was military.

No, like, no. Like the cop, you know, the captain. Barbosa, Patton, get in here. Barboza, cat. Wait, Barbosa, who? Caperson. Barbosa, Patterson. Get in here. Let me do it. Let me do it. Let me do it.

Babosa. Damn, get in here. We'll let you know. I liked it. It's all right. You'll let me know? I'll let you know. It was a cold read. Hey, this is Hollywood, baby. Okay. All right.

It's all cold reads. Yeah. I lost it in the room. Have you been in the room? Can I ask you that lately? Or is it all self-tapes? I haven't been in the room in probably pre-COVID. It sucks. No, I never like the room. You're crazy.

you like the room that's what you that you're book in the room not the park go in there hey you're doing good to see you yeah yeah i send my tape in i look fucking that i probably can pass the slate yeah but do you do tape do tape with him no they'll he'll do it in the studio sometimes i'll have like one of our producers do it or whatever yeah do you give notes no it's usually before or after i've left right he does that on personal time right because he's more of the actor than you are yeah you don't ever want to do it not really no i've never been drawn to it he did it you know before kind of comedy or whatever yeah i've never just been drawn to it.

And so do you slate? Yeah, I sleep. I don't think you slate, dude. I do slate. I've been pushing back on it lately all that stuff. Do you slate good? I mean, what's slate good? Hi, I'm H. Foley. I live in New York. I'm 5-11.

Well, fuck yourself. No. I need this. Don't fuck this up for me. That shit's so dumb. It's so dumb. You book the room, you book the job through the slate. Yeah. Then what the fuck is that? How do you do it then? You just took what he said. What do you mean? When he said you booked the room.

No, he's saying that most of the times the casting directors don't get past the slate. So the slate has to be good. What's a good slate then? As a novice, what's a good slate? I don't know. I mean, this is my theory. Hey, oh, tell me ho. My theory is this is that I try to get them to laugh through the slate.

You know what I mean? Sure. Like, I'll go backwards. You'll go backwards. Yeah, yeah. 5-11. Yeah, I'll slate my back. Los Angeles.

I'll just turn my whole back, my hell back, okay? You know what I mean? Or I'll, like, start giggling. I'll just do something. Do people do bits, like, corny bits? Like, I'm, you know what I'm, you know? Do you ever do the slate in character, whatever, whatever you're doing? Or you just, do it know.

Hey, forget about my Bobby Lee. Who's that? Hey, I'm five foot four, Bobby Lee. You know what I'm slate? And I do the, hey, forget about it. Oh, you'll do that. Yeah, yeah. That's good.

You're also, you're also Bobby Liz. what do you mean you know You're a known actor I'm not a known actor man I'm not a known actor you know You'd be surprised They go What have you done

That's crazy No but that's it That's the industry's problem Bobby That ain't you I know but there's always been a disconnect I've already said this before But there's always been a disconnect Between what's going on in the world

And what they're doing Sure Yeah You know what I mean It's a lot of like Although last night I was at the comedy store And there was a lot of Fox people there

Fox people Foxy people Fox people Okay From the network No We're in Hollywood They're from the woods

Oh Foxes You like Fox? I like foxes No there was And you know What What is happening?

Like Fox News or like Fox No no no no Brett Bear wasn't there I love Brett Bear Brett Bear It looks like a cartoon character No I just have You know

over the years you have relationships with it so they you know what were they doing there they did a showcase thing at the like Fox new faces or something which those things never work yeah what that's weird why Fox new faces no like they're seeing the new kids

like a showcase yeah they're gearing up to make a run yeah but looking at a fresh young hot talent that's why we're in town yeah but do you have like those kind of new facesy things I never was We've never done any of them. Yeah, me either. We've literally had zero industry, anything.

I'm not even joking. From any, no one's ever been like, do this or here's this thing. Yeah. Not one time. Not one time. Kevin Ryan did it all. Not, okay. Did, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Here's Kevin Ryan, new face. What do you mean? So you've never, like, never done, like, Netflix, hasn't said, hey, come do a show. No. No, nothing. Wow. We had some, we had some big Hollywood meetings this week. That's more in town.

All right, good, good. Suck our dick. Who with? Gelsons. Gelsons, the grocery store. I'm a cashier next week, part-time training. Wow. Yeah. So you did go today and you're pitching ideas or?

Yeah, but like. More general. More what are you doing? What are we doing? Yeah, it's just like, they're like, oh, you guys are doing great. And you're like, yeah, you can't. I don't know. Can you tell me what companies you want?

Yeah. Kevin Hartz. Great. All things comedy. All things comedy. Oh, yeah, that's easy. North Hills. North Hills.

Who'd you see at all things? The new. guy. Billy. Billy. Bosenberg. Yes. He's the best. And Drew. Yeah, great. Yeah, everybody's great. Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, you guys are with him. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Of course. Why not? Yeah, yeah. Because they knew we were doing We know what you're up. But Billy was a head of comedy at Hulu for a long time. Yeah. Yeah, he was great. No, everybody was really nice. It's

like very much, I don't know. Kevin Hart's got a nice place. Nice joint. We sat and there was, like, a 70-person conference room was meet him and one other guy. Wow. Were you nervous? What? No. We were pretty hungover. Nervous. Over. Whoa. I like the confidence. What are you talking about?

What do you mean? Is that that a valid question? Nervous. Yeah. What am I? An open micer with a number on my chest? What are you talking? Hi, H. Foley, 511 from New York.

They never gave us anything. We took it. What are you going to do? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Huh? Yeah. But do you have a plan thing when you go in there? No, not really.

We're good at winging it. Yeah. We do have a plan thing. We sign with new management. We have like an 18-month plan of things that we're in the process of producing. Oh, great, good. Scripted, unscripted. Great, great, great.

You can send it a self-tape. See if you're, see if you work out for any of the projects. Would I have to read for you guys, you think? Shut up. No. Yes. Never. Never.

It's because, like, you're not going to, you, let's say you'd write a drama movie, and he comes in. Are you talking us? Yeah. He talks to the space. Well, the area. And then you say you're trying to make the people laugh, but what if it's a drama role? Like, well, I'm, you know, dumb ass. Yeah, yeah.

you do that shit on Christopher Nolan will fucking bounce you with that weird soundtrack I saw a tenant on a plane I almost fucking freaked out pull it back with that a little bit will you? Yeah, pull it back

Jesus Christ Have you guys seen the new PTA movie yet? Yeah, I want to see it It's out I know Yeah Paul Thomas Anderson Yeah, I hear it's incredible

It's his best one yet Yeah, I heard it's a masterpiece I hear it as well Yeah Did you see weapons? I did not I did not Why?

Heard it's really good. Do you see it? Not yet. No, it's too dark. I love that movie. Don't you love that movie? Children and I don't know anything about it right now. Oh, you're not a film guy.

Not really. I'll say I can't watch it. I have like no time to watch anything. Well, yeah. He's three months old. Oh, really? Oh, really? Yes.

Oh, but you have time to do this? This is a mother. This is a fact. You have time to slurp, slurp, slurp. Yeah, my titty is, yeah, I'm a cow. Yeah, but when you're slurping, slurping, slurping, why can't you just watch something? You literally have time for nothing, nothing. Do you switch titties?

Sometimes I will, yeah. Yeah. Oh, you will? You have to. Is your wife breastfeeding? No, we're doing bottom. I'm doing it. Get the good stuff.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. What comes out of their age? Mountain Dew. Yeah, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow. Is that what you're breastfeeding? Yeah. You can't do both, right? You can't do what?

You can't do formula and breastfeeding. You can do both. You can do combo feeding. I thought you said you can't do both. You can do whatever you want. I don't know anything about it. Yeah, but. A bunch of suckers, hey, Bobby?

Fall for it. We can't fucking hop on a jet right now and go to Reno. Sit alone in a hotel room. I mean, can I ask you guys something? Please. Yes. Give me the three. Have you seen him?

Whoa. In the middle of a question. This is like whack-a-mole of an interview. Is that a movie? Yeah. Do you have notes? Kind of. Wait, what?

Let's see them. No, no, no. Can I see the notes? He never shares them. He never shares them, yeah. How did, did you? There is mostly stickers on that notebook. I thought, I thought Foley said that as a bit.

Just so the audio listener out there. Yeah. Did you know these guys before? No. You just started kind of working here, right? Yeah. Thanks to Roe. Through Ralph.

You guys met. So Ralph came here with Jaime. Uh-huh. And he was sitting over there, Jaime. Uh-huh. Yeah. And I looked at him, I go, what is that? He did the same thing in our studio.

called security on them Oh really? You went over there? No, you came. Remember you came out? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Go sleep. You did? Sorry, we bored you. No, it's because...

That's right, you guys were fucking drinking. Yeah, we were. But you didn't have them on the pod? No. Oh, this guy's gold. They had just started... You guys had just started the podcast and Ralph was promoting something.

Oh, I see. Okay. All right. No, we did not see him. Okay. Can we move on? Yeah. It's pretty wicked. What the fuck is him?

It's a... It's, it's, Jordan Peel produced a movie called. Oh, yeah. Oh, is that the football one? The football one, yeah. He's in a position that I, um, I don't envy. A lot of pressure, probably. What, a rich famous director?

Yeah, I must suck. Getting your dick sucked all the time. You're Slaten. Yeah. What, Bobby Slaten? Oh, I said, your shout out to the pit bull. Oh, thank you. Why do you think he's in a bad spot?

It's just a lot of pressure. I don't know, I, you know. He hasn't texted me back in like a year, yeah. That's your boy. I just assume he's busy. Sure. With his own stuff. Come on.

You got your own stuff, too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're Bobby Lee, dude. Why do you keep saying? Because stop being dumb. You're our favorite. You're dumb, too, dude. I am dumb.

Yeah, yeah. I'm real dumb. Give me three positives now. About what? Anything? No, if I wanted a baby. About, uh, you could tell me, each one of you could be.

No. Go, if I'm, let's see you guys, I'm, we're at a cafe. I don't know we have to be at a cafe, but let's say we're a cafe. I go, hey, guys, I'm thinking about having a baby. Give me some positives here. I got nothing. I got nothing. We're still super early.

Yeah. He just started, it's like, he started, like, laughing and smile. Like, once that happened, the first couple of weeks, you're like, this, what did we do? This is fucking crazy. Yeah, it's crazy. It's just, like, and you're just a grind. It's just, like, and you're, like, you feel like you're smoking meth.

Like, you're just, like, up, your day. You don't know what day it is. It's fucking crazy. Wow. And then you're like, at that point, then you start thinking, you're like, well, this was, everybody's like the second you see them, it's going to be the bed. I'm like, well, that didn't fucking happen. You didn't happen.

No, no, no. Yeah, yeah. But once he starts smiling, you can connect with him and stuff like that. It's awesome. It's very weird. So what's a smile like? He looks like a big fat Irish baby. Big blue eyes, big fat white, roundhead.

Cool little guy. Yeah? Yeah. Did he smile when he sees you? Yeah. Oh, that's so sweet. Yeah. So when they smile and then what else is another positive?

That's about all I got. They're really, really funny. They're funnier than any walking adult. They're funny. They're weird and funny. They're funny, Bobby, they're funny I'm funny Kids not on Fox moonface

Never when my baby just went up to you And decided he's gonna bite your nose For no reason Yeah, that was cute Yeah That was funny Are you Uncle Bobby or will you be Uncle Bobby? He's Uncle Bob

He is now petrified of me now I think it was because it was a lot of people In one setting But if it was one-on-one You guys, he likes it a lot He was like if he's facing me He goes And he just pulls his

They go through a stage of, like, stranger danger, but it's normal. Yeah, yeah. And I'm like, you know what I'm just so excited. I need this, sure. Do you want to have a kid? Woo! Fuck that, get that. That's what the fight in London was about.

You and me, kid. Come on. I, uh, I think, who said this? Somebody said this to me. Oh, your stepdad said this. Roger. Roger said to me the other day, goes, don't have one. He said the same thing.

And I go, right? And I go, why? He goes, you're too old. By the time he's 10, you'll be 64. Yeah. You know what I mean? My dad had me in his 60s, and it was like half of my life was watching him die. So it was pretty crazy.

I wouldn't recommend too old, but you're not in your 60s yet. You're 50, what, four? Yeah. You're fine. Also, another thing that this is what I heard that you need is a partner. Yeah. It's got to be someone you like to. I know.

I'd say love, but that's just like. It's got to be someone you meet at the bus stop or something. You know what I mean? What about you, big guy? You want to have kids? Yeah. How old are you? You're young.

We're 29. 29. You got a girl? No. No? What happened to that one girl? I don't know. She saw the notepad.

She stole my cue cards. Did you see him? She was the batty, the one you sent food to her and stuff. You were dating a baddie? A girl down there? A daddy baddie. Texas? Single mom, right?

By where you guys are? Yeah. Your boys are probably doing. all right down ain't you he's doing all right I'm sure you're doing all right oh no you're struggling your cool cars and no I'm I'm struggling a bit killing it what do you mean

Ralph's fucking Hollywood you're killing it How long you've been doing stand up Two years now Look at where you are now Yeah that's a pretty good fucking two years It's a good it took us 15 years to get here Yeah that's a pretty good thing You should be grateful

I'm grateful notes Get the big dog a dope bag Me some stickers will you Yeah Rob has it all right now so Well you were just casually seeing this bird? Then it fizzled out. Do you remember who I'm talking about? Are there many? That many? She's friends on me.

How? She's like, hey. I wouldn't fuck him. Yeah. I got to explain this, Steve. I think she went back to her baby daddy. Oh, what are you doing with that? Did you try? Did you make moves? I sent her flowers. He's a sweet young

boy. Sweet boy, and I like that for you. Where'd you meet her, if you don't mind me as on the apps or something? On the apps or something? Mutual friend Mutual friend But she already had a kid She had two kids Two kids

What are you doing She's 72 Did you make a That's the move you made Is you sent flowers Well she was sick So I was like Oh you don't want to be sweet

And send her flowers And you sent her like soup too Right For food Couple can't of soup Oh that's so sweet Did you meet the kids We're on FaceTime one time

Did you go out on a date with her Not yet Not yet Oh what did you mean Nothing What did you mean? What is nothing? What do you mean?

You just liked her? You never even met in person? Yeah, we met in person, but like coffee, but not like a dinner date. Oh, I thought you guys were, like, legit dating. No. Yeah. Wow. Yeah.

She faced, oh, I told you, right, when she was FaceTime Mimi. Yeah. And her kid popped up in the screen, and she, the kid is like, Papa. I was like, oh, no, not yet. And what did you say? Hmm? Did you bang her? Would I marry here?

No. No? Yeah. Kiss her. No. Nothing. You just put on a coffee date. Coffee, yeah.

Did he kissed her? On the cheek. On the cheek. This guy's a gentleman. You are a gentleman. I have to say it. Kind of flowers. Rose.

Yeah, look at Kalala. She wasn't there. Peanies? No, no, no, the white ones. Orchids? Dazis. Dazis. Daisies?

You can order daisies? Daisies? You can order daisies? I thought you just get those in a lot of course of the street. Orchid. You sent her an orchid. Yeah, yeah. That's nice.

Just one? No. That's what you send her. A whole. A whole. Well, yeah, what do you call those? A whole? The whole dozen.

With moss and everything. Yeah, the whole dozen. A dozen orchid doesn't exist. That's a lot of orchids. That's a lot of orchids. Well, it's sunflowers. It was like... It was a sunflower.

It's a sunflower seed. Yeah, yeah. Ranch, ranch style. It was an orchids. Got her a bag of Dave's Killer Bread. Did you go pick them up or did you order them online? I ordered them. I got them delivered.

Got them sent over there. So you guys were talking. You got a coffee, talked to the kid on FaceTime. She wasn't feeling well. You sent her some flowers. Yeah. And then got back from on the road. And I was like, hey, let's get some dinner.

And then she's like, hey, I think we should just be friends. I don't want to seem like I'm interested in you. You go get the suit back? Jesus. I would have fucking marched over. You can never talk to her again. I'm with Bobby on this one. You can, friend zone, fuck you.

You're talking about you, you're not closing ass out there on the road? Yeah. You're not closing ass out there on the road? I don't know what he knows what that means, but he knows what that means. H, some people are openers, some people are closers. He's neither. That's, hey. We're going to be working for this kid one day.

What are you talking about? But do you know that He wouldn't, he says that he would never even get with a sex worker. Yeah. Ever, ever. Oh, yeah, I can't. Why? Because I have to have a connection with her. Oh, you want a spiritual connection.

Yeah, yeah. But you also said you don't want to have to tell your wife one day. Is that what you said on my pod? You have to have a connection with her. What do you mean? Like, I have to feel her. They can get coke. She needs to be a plug.

You know, like, I have to feel her love. You can't, you can't do that with somebody you just met? Mm-mm. Really? Like a one-night stand? Huh. Really? You can't do one-night stands.

Wow. It won't work. Good guy. What? What won't work? You won't get hard. Oh, your penis won't work. You got to lay off the Coke.

Yeah. Do you get hard easy? Me? Yeah. Hard right now. So easy. I didn't for a while, but the blood's coming back. Yeah.

Yeah. How about you? Do you get here? Yeah. Okay. Like a lot. All right. Pretty easy.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What about you? Pretty good. Yeah? Well, you know, pretty good. Doing all right. Have you noticed it throttle back as you've gotten older?

I'll throttle back. I like that term. That happened to me, but it's coming back. No, I find it to be very potent as of late. That's good. Yeah, yeah. Your erections or your load?

Well, you know, I don't watch the porn anymore. Really? So I, you know what I mean? Clear mind. Yeah, the gun is loaded. Wow. Yeah, yeah. And when it releases, my God,

it's like shotgun spread. You know what I mean? It spreads all over the place. You know what I mean? Chinese fireworks. What? Nothing? What?

I said Chinese. Yeah, it's like, Chinese fireworks, yeah. It's like, you know, when you pee and your, your, your, your, your, um, hole is clogged up by some cum and then, you know, I mean, you spray it. It goes two different ways. Did that still happen to you? Yeah.

Okay. What do you, I'm not actually, I'm asking, I'm asking, I'm asking, like, I'm asking. Kevin's a squatter. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I told you that in private. That's what the fight was about.

I shit all over my bedroom. Yeah. Well, I, um, have you ever done this? I did this last couple weeks ago where once I stuck it in I farted What the fuck is right?

I don't think I have Has that ever happened? Involuntarily No it was on purpose thing Oh I thought you were No but it would We laughed so hard Did smell?

No But it was like a cute one too And we went slow And I went Oh quick one Yeah yeah And then we both died Laughing historically

Sounds like a nice furl Uh someone's getting friends zoom send her some daisies orchids that is nice that you have that where you can laugh I laugh every time baby that's a funny that is that you can laugh

with her is very funny you don't have laughs no I'm yes I do I'm saying that's a good connection Yeah I get it Yeah yeah yeah I'm not accusing you of anything I know you did you said that was an accusation You don't have laughs? Yeah

You don't have any good time Yeah I mean do you have laughs with your guy Of course Yeah good Bolli do you have laughs with your guy I do What about you, Gil? I'm more shy

My wife won't care She's like just fart But I had to like leave the room Still, you're married? Because I feel bad for her That's good It's more I feel bad for her I can't fart in front of significant others

Ever Ever She's not well fucking Ever, you've never heard me fart Have you be honest Have you? By accident if I'm in the bathroom And you barge in maybe

Bongo coconut farts Dude farts Nope, nope, nope, nope, don't I don't, I don't. Yeah, yeah, that's you, dude. No, I never heard senior fart. Yeah. You've never seen me fart.

I've cleaned your shit, dude. Whoa. All right, dude. I'm wearing the toilet. No, like he used to shit his pants for fun. I got old school dog. Fun. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

The Prius, right? He used to shit in the car. Yeah, like in public, he would just, like, randomly, his bowels would just give out, and there would have to be some cleaning involved afterwards, and he would be too embarrassed to do it himself. Don't have a baby. Why? Because you can't have two of your shit

Yeah, we can be pulling together Holding hands You would do that on purpose Like as a bit? What do you mean? No, his bowels would just give out Without like a medical? Oh, you want to get into my medical situation?

I'll tell you. Do you have something? Yeah. What do you got? I'm lactose intolerant. Blacktoes intolerant And I get buffalo mozzarella cheese. It's over.

Really? Game over, dude. Wow. You know what the worst one is ricotta. You put some ricotta in me? Oh, my God. It's a blood bath. What about burrata?

Oh, blood bath. Yeah, yeah. Benchengo? Pretty good. Pepper gel. Yeah. Provalone. No, so these kind of cheese.

Cooper sharp. Oh, the hard cheeses you're okay with. Hard cheese is nothing. Parmesan or Reggiano. Because it's raw. You're fine. I'm fine. Yeah, it's raw.

It's the wet cheeses that really do it for me. Nacho cheese. What? No, that's fine, too. Nacho cheese. I don't know what it is about buffalo because of the milk, I think. The buffalo. The buffalo mozzarella.

You a cheese guy? Me, I don't know so much. No, no cheese? I find that hard. No cheese. fascinating man he doesn't in fact he's not a complex either

like you have a chicken finger guy chicken tender yeah oh sorry an aristocrat what's your background

are you a Mexican what did you what did you get the name from from my parents he sound like a like a Jewish lawyer I do the name

no Jaime that's how they put it out Spanish there's Jaime oh okay your mom cook it up she'd do good yeah

yeah so buying and everything. Like he, like, are you go with sushi? What do you mean, am I good with it? Good to eat it. You've ever been to Sea World? My good with it. Yeah, I mean, do you eat sushi? Fuck yeah. Do you eat sushi? No. I'm a picky eater. My thing is like, I'll try. I'll try most

stuff, though. Oh, you will? I'll try it. I'll try everything once, but I just it doesn't connect. Really? So if we went, Kevin Ryan's in town, I go, let's go some sushi. Kevin Ryan's in town? What? A couple of big meetings are there. Yeah. But, um, would you get sushi with me? No, probably not. We went to Noble one time. Oh, you didn't like it.

He's fucking freaking out. We're going to give him the fucking apple juice on the iPad. Shut him up. Put my earmuffs on. Yeah. What's your go-to? Like meat and potatoes? I like a nice.

Chicken parmesan. That's Jaime eating sushi for the first time. What was it? What exactly was? It was a eel. It was a California roll. No, it wasn't. And then he started gagging.

It was eel. I'm with you on the eel. That takes a minute. Yeah, that takes a minute. Yeah. That's the best. It's my best friend. You're yelling at them.

I feel like sushi has remarkably gone downhill Oh, you think so On a mass scale Wow Yeah And you know what I don't really fuck with it

A lot lately either Why not? I don't know You know what I had the other day That fucked me up to Which I will never have again Raman From where

What the fuck are you talking about I'm talking about ramen I'm crazy No I had Sukkaman ramen Why? What do you mean? You're not going to have it again

Have you heard of Sukum and ramen Yeah What is Sukum and ramen ramen. It's when you're Sukhman a guy's dick. I'm not at that. What is it? You know what? You're tone right now?

I don't like to hear you say that. What? You're not going to have ramen anymore. Yeah, yeah. This particular style of ramen. You want an investor in it? Yeah, yeah. I know that. You can't have them. They take your eyes away, wouldn't they?

Put Kevin's on you. Yeah. I was with some friends and we had Sukkman and ramen. And I was so hungry. But can you explain what this is it? I'm going to tell you now. What's the base broth of like a... It's a lot denser.

Pork. Okay. It's, and you dip the noodles into it rather than... So it comes to two bowls. Yeah. Okay. One of this condensed like broth. Mm-hmm.

Right? And then there's a side of noodles with a lime and some chasu pork. Mm-hmm. And you take the noodles, you dunk it into the broth and you eat it that way. Mm-hmm. Right. It's more of an intense flavor. Gotcha.

And we thought we all had some salmina salmilla. Yeah, we got immediately into cold shivers. Yeah. Diarrhea. Wow. It was bad. Hmm. It happens.

It does happen. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That shit's cooking for like weeks, isn't it? Mm-hmm. Aren't they boiling that for a long time? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We get the flavor. Yeah, it was so good, but I may never have it again.

Like, you'll be back on. You know, pudding pops? Jello pudding pops? Yeah, the Bill Cosby kind. Sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's the biggest mistake America ever fucking made. What, pudding pops?

Getting rid of those. They did? Yeah, they've been gone for 30 years. A couple more than that. And it's been all downhill from there. But when I was a kid, when I got sick from it. Really? Yeah.

And I never, it was like, I dread them even to this day. Really? The thought of them. Oh, they're going. You don't have to worry about it. Okay, good. That's probably why. They're probably all recalled.

No, they were great. I don't know what happened. We fucked up getting rid of those. It had like a thin ice layer around it, and the buttons on the bottom were so good. They were great. What kind of putipods do you have? Can you pull it up? There's buttons on the bottom?

It's like it had like a little shelf of ice. There he is. Oh. Yeah, he was a salesman. Who is that, by the way? Yeah, yeah. Say what you want. He could move merchants.

Oh, back then he could, yeah. Yeah, his voice, the gentleman pudding. They're great. You ever have those? No. I had the bluebell. Mm. A bluebell.

Banana pudding. Gotcha. What do you think of high-end ice cream shops? High-end ice cream shop. There's some new ones. There's, you know, salt and straw. Have you had salt and straw? Strawn straw? No, we'll do like that

what's in New York, like Morgansteen's Van Loven, that kind of stuff. Yeah, we'll do that. My wife is all over that shit. Yeah, yeah, Van Luan's good. If you want, what? Nah, I'm a Ben and Jerry's man. I like a Maloney Bar. You know those? You know that. You know those? You know those. Cherry Garcia. Banging. I do the Tonight Show guy. Tonight show is great.

That's great. Chubby hubby. Chunky monkey? Chunky monkey? I think it's Chunky chip cookie dough. I like that from Ben and Jerry's. Cherry Garcia? I don't know. I have to say one. Yeah. Is it my turn? Or even Ben and, not Benjardia,

Baskin Robbins, I thought well. Baskin Robbins? Yeah, sure. You guys go to Handles? Yeah, I love handles. Me too. Handles is great. They make it there.

But here's the thing about handles, and there's a place called Kiwi. We're just redoing the same place every couple of years. It's just frozen yogurt that you go and do yourself and then put gummy bears in. It just changes over names. You know what I'm saying? No, I don't explain it to me.

It's the same fucking thing. I like to say the exact same description of what it is. But like for like five years, it's like handles, handles, handles. And then that goes away. They tank it, bankrupt. Right. Right. But I think what you're saying about handles?

Can I defend handles real quick? No, no, yeah. Right. Handles, they make it there. Everybody makes it there. Baskin Robbins doesn't make their ice cream there. I'm talking about the frozen yogurt places, not Baskin'Roy. But why did you bring frozen yogurt when we're talking about ice cream?

Handles is frozen yogurt. I thought handles was ice cream. It's ice cream. No, it's not. There's a difference. 16 handles and handles. Oh, fuck. I have no idea what I'm talking.

Can I see your notebook? I thought you were talking about 16 candles. Handles is like very indulgent, rich ice school. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Gotcha. Oh, look at this. Yeah, what's that? That's 16 handles.

There's a place, listen. Ah, okay. That's not his fault. There's a place handles and 16 handles. I think you're right. You know what, dude? What are we doing here? We're not, yeah, we're not...

By the way, what's up with your Joe's pizzas out here? Is that, that's not connected to New York, is it? You don't think we're going to go back and tell them? Yeah, yeah, what the fuck? They're fucking good. They're fucking, like the original. That's not connected. They're not connected.

It's the fucking same thing, man. That's funny because we're starting a podcast called Tiger Belly. We're doing Tiger's stomach. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because it's, I'll tell you why your pizza's better. I know. The water. The water.

The water. Yeah, but do you know if the Joe... What are we on a fucking Star Maps bus? You don't think we know that? We got it parked out front. A hop on, hop off. Who is that Pat Sajack? Yeah.

It's the water. It's the water. Yeah. Which I don't know if that's really true. Why is it better then? There's great pizza out here. I mean, maybe in the 50s it was. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Where is Prince Street originally from? New York, I think. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Lowery side, Prince Street. Yeah. Wow, I feel like it's a gift to L.A. It is so good. It's so good.

So good. The naughty pie? Oh, my God. I don't like the honey, though. The hot honey? That's everywhere now. I'm not with the honey. Not with the honey.

I'm not with the fucking honey. What are we doing? A little bit here and there, but it's like fucking, it's everywhere. A pineapple. You're in the pineapple? Do a Hawaiian, of course. Yeah, I do a Hawaiian. Can I ask you something, guys?

Yeah, buddy. We're talking about pizza right now. I forgot even. I have a pizza question. Is this about money? And pizza. So money, we have it. But pizza.

See? You don't worry about that, bro. You got cash. Oh, yeah, right. Killing it. Pizza. I was in New York. Okay, you guys love pizza?

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The school newspaper. We were talking about it for five minutes. He asked questions like a nervous informant who has a wire on them. about to get found out. He's like pizza? You like me? You like drugs? You guys do drugs? Where would you get your drugs?

I would like to buy four kilos, please. It's almost as if he wasn't even in the room. He just pops in. And then he pops back out. Big pizza. Big pizza. Are you listening to what we're saying? No, you're not.

I am. Don't listen to Bobby. Go ahead. If I wasn't listening, I would have talked about something else besides pizza. Like what? Like pineapples. I just said pineapple. Exactly.

So why would I switch to subject? Say something else. Make them look like a dick. Pizza, pizza, okay. Okay, go ask the question. Oh, you love pizza, right, guys? We got that far, dude. If you say that again, I swear to God.

Can you slate before this and take it from the top? Yeah. Pizza is good, right, guys? Yeah. What the fuck? Are you fucking with us? No. Okay.

Okay. Okay, I was in New York a couple days ago. Okay. You're getting around. Yeah, what the fuck? I'm paying for these flights. There you go. And, um...

I answered the exact same way. I was doing spots out there. In New York comedy club. Yeah. Nice. Where were you at? New York Comedy Club. Shout out to it.

Shout out to it. And Greenidge. There you go. There you go. You're fucking killing it. He's all right. Two years in, Tiger Belly. Look at this kid.

He likes pizza. And I passed by the comedy cellar because I can't get in yet. But I want to Joe's Pizza, the one by the cellar. Sure. And I'm meeting. Father Dimo Square. Yeah. It's the original.

Yeah. It is? Yeah. Very good one. And I'm meeting about. pizza by myself and I hear like a group of tourists fucking tourists am I right you're like a

hey I'm walking here you feel me I feel you dog you don't got to say no more I'm not a tourist in New York I know where to go you're working there you're not a tourist you're a fast-paced dude so I don't believe that but no for real like when I'm walking stop taking pictures of Times Square

Emma Joe's pizza and I I have big ears so I overhear everybody's conversations Is he workshopping something? I don't know what you're doing. Are you making this up? No, for real. I'm about to ask a question. So this group of people...

Like a fucking madly. They're like tourists. They're like, oh, we should... This is the place that TikTok sent us and Joe's pizza. And the girl in the group said, yeah, I love pepperoni and cheese, but I wish they had more flavors. Is that the correct term or should they say more topics? That was a long way to get it. I do like the topic for discussion.

Long way to get there. woman is what you call it dumb broad ice cream is flavors yeah yeah different kind of slices yeah but at a pizza shop it's more I wish to have more toppings right more toppings different variety I think you would say that's fucking you know

what would you say unrelated but why is it say Harry Styles on your note pad oh he's a good guy he's on the kidnap list next it says Jaime Stiles he wants to marry him Harry Styles and hearts around it yeah that was somebody else but yeah what did i like not take you off but like the pizza toppings you okay bobby what the

fuck is the question i thought we answered it no oh yeah the answer you mean is that the wrong thing to say yeah like oh yeah no it's not you would say you would say toppings i think yeah that's why i told you don't want to do that shit though you don't want that crap fucking comedian new york guy you could do a slice of pepperoni slice of cheese you get out of there yeah yeah but i told her like hey that's the wrong term you should say toppings wait wait you interjected these strangers? Yes, because, like, he's got to set these broad

straight. What if she goes back and she's like, I wish they had one flavors. Like, that's not a flavor. To me, to my mind is I wouldn't even like care.

Why would you care? Because, so I can correct her. Yeah, but it doesn't matter. I'm like, you're eating your pizza. What?

You correct him all the time. He's got on this because this is being out shown all over the place. Do you want to correct somebody in person? No, I'm not going to interject like, hey,

by the way, by the way, it's not. fucking flavors, it's toppings. I didn't say it like that. How'd you say it? Excuse me, you meant to say toppings. That's fucking crazy.

I really like to talk about it. It's crazy. That's insane. Did she say, do you work here? No, she's like, who are you? I just have. Five hour energy. Five hour energy.

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You know Rappar I don't have big ears You know Rapa Rosa Bobby Lee Yeah yeah yeah Wow

Okay here Here's another question Go ahead I think I don't think You cut to the chase And also Let me

Do the story No I like to hear this Oh yeah Yeah Yeah yeah Yeah Yeah We're at Panette

The trilogy We're at All three Godfathers Let's do it Okay I'm at Panda Express

With my friend Okay Here we go. We're eating. Is this in New York? No, it's in Glendale. Okay. Okay.

Is this directed to me then, because it's Panda Express? No, this is about the- It's eating, it's about us. Okay. No, it's not about eating. It's about- It actually doesn't take place. Okay, go back to it.

Panda Express. They're everywhere, not just in New York. I got you. Panda Express is Glendale. I wasn't, you said you were in New York. I thought you got Panda Express out there. Wait, yeah, Pan-Express and Glendale. It was at the Grendel Mall.

Okay. Okay. What were you getting at the mall? What were you getting at the mall? Some shirts. Some shirts. H. Just let them. And then me and my friend, we get an argument because I told her yesterday at the hotel, I was watching cable TV because that's all they have, cable TV. And I was watching the first 48. And she's like, don't you mean streaming?

I said, no. They were airing because there's a difference between streaming and airing, right? Yes. that's it she was like no you were streaming it and you were like no they were airing they were airing it

because it was at 8 p.m. Again I don't know if that's something that you would correct I don't think it would bother me enough to go okay but streaming

is technically you're right yes right yeah yeah yeah you're technically right back then there was nothing of streaming

yeah said oh the new movies coming out at 8 p.m it's airing at p.m. Yeah you wouldn't say streaming but these new people

these new age people they're like new age or just younger generation. Younger. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, you know what it is? It's these, you have thoughts, right? So we all have thoughts. Sure. These small little thoughts that pop up, right? But we don't take the thoughts, bring it down, and say it out loud. This is why you're not getting late. I do, listen.

I would, I do think that's a... Say that to a guy. Okay, but like, you just told me there's a difference between... Yeah, there's a difference between flavor and topics. You're right, you're right, you're right. You're right. You're really right. You're right.

You're right. Barcasting. Don't die on those hills. You know what I mean? Yeah, but like, you got more important shit going. I know, dude. I don't think he does. I saw the notebook.

People don't believe me. He doesn't believe you. The people like, when I get in arguments like this. And who is the friend? Just a friend from Burbank. And why was it important that it was Panda Express? Well, this is the thought, I think that's what I'm saying. That thought of, hey, isn't it, isn't it wacky how we say airs, but it's really

streams now? That is a thought. Yeah, that is a thought. That story does not need to start a PANDexpress. It doesn't. It does because I wouldn't be able to ask this. What'd you have? Panxpress?

Nope. Obviously, I had Pandy Express. I had beef and broccoli with fried rice and spring egg. Just one entree? No. So what was that one? Oh, it was double with beef and broccoli. Did you guys split the check or did you eat?

How'd you do that? Is she a friend or would you like it to be more? No, she's a comedian from here. Oh, but I paid. Do we know her? You paid. Very good man. Yeah.

Good man. But still, she was arguing about, like, streaming versus broadcasting. Okay. And airing. I got it. Broadcasting. Oh, broadcasting. We got it.

Do you go to Panda? Yeah. What's your dish? Because I have my go-to dish. I just do the orange chick. I'm a straight. I like a, I like a. I agree

Chinese baby Do you like the new spicy orange chicken that they have? I don't think I've had it Honestly I know The orange chicken I go I live in fucking Queens Yeah

I still I go to Nihoa Whatever it's called I think that's what it is Oh I was talking about Panop Because you guys have really good Chinese in New York Yeah so do you guys

I'm sure you guys have it too We do SGV San Francisco Yeah Some of the best Chinese I ever had was in Pacifica Yeah

Raymans Really If you ever in Pacifica Yeah And the rapture's not happening. Go to Raymond's. What's that place in San Francisco we go to? Oh, it's San Tongues.

San Tongues. And you made a call for me, right? And they give us that a little private room. You have to stay. You have to be in line by 430. Like fights break out at this place. You know it's that good. I would never do that.

Yeah. No, it's that good. Have you guys been to Panda Inn in in California? Panda Inn is the original Panda Express, but they just reopened. They're high-end fancy Panics. And you know what? That's another mistake we made. A lot of those places have closed down.

In the 90s, you go out to dinner with your Jewish friends' parents. You go to a nice Chinese sit-down. They put the crispy noodles and the duck sauce and ham mustard on the table. He had a great waiter. He'd get a drink with a fucking an umbrella in it. He'd have stuff going around, the lazy Susan in the middle. It's crazy. Oh, a sit-down Chinese?

We still have a good amount here in San Gabriel Valley. On the East Coast, they're all... It was like every strip mall. You know, like the big halls? Like the really big restaurants. We still have them here. I love it. They're so good.

Yeah. Like Boston Lobster and then Newport Seafood. Newport Seafood's the best. But Boston Lobster, so I think the chef, they started beefing. So he left. He opened another place across the street called Boston Lobster, and it's the exact same menu. And it's just as good. Wow.

And it's huge, too. You know what I do? You want to hear something? I would love to hear everything. I get a wonton. And we have these big bowls. I get the wonton. Put a couple of wanton in there.

Salivating. I don't know. I get duck sauce. and hot mustard, I put a packet of each in there. What's duck sauce? Mix it around. Hot mustard? What's hot mustard?

What's duck sauce? You know duck sauce? What are you talking about? Is it the plum sauce, like sweet? No. It's the orange stuff. Okay. Put that in there, and then I put my egg,

my shrimp roll in there, and I eat that with a spoon and let it soak in. Wow. Is it good? Chinese food after this? We should. You're a Chinese guy?

Yeah, yeah. You're Chinese? What do you do? Oh, yeah. Beef and broccoli? Beef and broccoli? Orange chicken. Yeah.

duck sauce i mean i've been waiting for five minutes to tell you my dish but go ahead oh yeah that's right we built it up now and it's like it's like it's like when i say it's all right it's already chicken i know i mean no when i say it they're gonna be like okay let's shocking yeah yeah well no it's it's it's pretty shocking it's not shocking fried noodles and lobster sauce no no no i don't do a guessing game it'll take forever you'll never guess it why not i'm talking about pan express specifically oh i know what it is what is it eggplant yeah it's a that's one of them what's the second Beijing beef yes What's the third?

There's a third? Yeah. Do you know the third? I don't know third. I always thought it was either cashew or orange chicken. No. Kungpao? Kumpal.

But you got the fucking... Bobby likes his chicken spicy? That's a spicy. That's a spicy. That was racist, Bobby. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, she knows. Hey, I remember Pizza Hut back then in the 90s?

Oh, fuck, here we go. Still around, but... No, yeah, but Pizza Hut, when you can walk in and dine in with your family. Yeah, I remember. Same thing. Jewish friends. friends, eh? Of course.

Jewish friends. He's not Jewish. He said Jewish. No, when I would go out to dinner with my Jewish friends parents. Oh, the buffet. I love the buffet. The old school, because it's like nostalgia is such a big thing. They're opening up all over the country.

Oh, really? Yeah, yeah. Because the fucking crust on this is different. Yeah, it's pan. I know it's pan. No, I know it's pan. But there's a butter. No, there's a buttery.

The buttery, yeah. Butteriness to the fucking crust. That's unlike anything else, Pizza Hut. Yeah, it's a great old school place. Have you ever been to um MOT 32 No that's what I'm saying That's where we went remember there was only four of these in the world

And one of them is in the Philippines The Chinese the duck place Where they like dance with a duck before Oh yeah yeah yeah the dancing duck Yeah yeah yeah yeah we love a dancing duck Yeah which place are you talking about? I fucking that's why I froze What it's an old school pizza place

Shakeys? No Excalibur or it's something like that Ex-caliber. What did you guys do right before this hit? Right before what hit? Are you garbage? I thought you were talking about the drugs. We were, yeah, we were working comedians.

You know? No, but I mean, he was waiting tables. Oh, waiting tables. Yeah, waiting tables and then hosting a New York comedy club and doing little bit parts. And he was working the road. I was, yeah, DoorDash. I was DoorDash when the podcast was like pretty popular still.

And I was like, I would be getting recognized. Why would you still do that? You did the money, dude, because you put it back in the business, Bobby, because the industry wasn't coming to fucking save us. Yeah. He'd put it back in. Kevin Ryan. Yeah, yeah.

And this guy. Yeah. And Panda Express. And his weird religion. And your cousin. And Bobby Lee. Yeah, wow. But it was lucky I had the, it was during the pandemic so I could wear the mask.

And then, like, a lot of people, you were just dropping it at the door. So I didn't have to see a bunch of people. Wow. Just think if you were doing that what you'd be doing. Fucking rubbing your balls on people's French. fries and shit you're in there you're hungry

and you're driving with someone's McDonald it's like takes everything to not fucking open it up and start eating really? Oh my god

I'm a fat ass yeah yeah wow I'm a fat ass what fry? No well it's very much

sealed here's where I would go wrong okay I would I would deliver a food to a house right

and they didn't tip me well I would note that of course so the next time I get that address then I would do something. Roaches.

Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah. I'll give you one shot. That's it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm not, I wouldn't. One opportunity.

Yeah. I mean, because I just, when they don't tip, people don't tip, you know, you've been in the service industry. Sure. It's infuriating. Of course. Yeah. Is it not? It is.

And, you know, there was times when I couldn't tip well and now we're making, I make up for lost time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But even back in the day, I always did 15. I'll leave something. Take these roaches. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I always did 15%.

Yeah, yeah, at least. What, 15%? Yeah. That's not tipping well. Back when I was poor. Oh, when you're poor. God damn, man. Just making sure.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. What are you tipping now? 20, 30? Well, well over. Sometimes 50. Really? Yeah, you know. Bobby Lee.

You're doing this too? You picking this up? Yeah. But he does this weird thing if the service is really bad, then he tips over 100%. To let him know? Don't tell you about. That's the rich man's roaches. I like that.

Yeah, I like that. Oh, what's the mean? Like, what's your, what's your motivation? Well, no, guess it. Because he's going to get the guy fired as soon as he gets home. Guess what the motivation would be. I don't know.

That's kind of a mind fucking... It's like a fuck you. Because they kind of know they're not doing well. They know they didn't deserve that. Yes. So they're going, fuck, does it make them think like I was kind of a dick? And I don't know.

It's this. I like it, though. People, if they don't know who I am, people think I won't. Well, what? Tip. I don't think visually. I look like a tipper.

You mean, because... I just, the way I am, is... I've never agreed with anything more. I do have to say. I think they just assume, oh, this guy has no money, he's not going to tip. But not because of your ethnic candy cap. You mean just...

Not because you're Asian. It's not the Korean part. Yeah. It's just the way... It's just the way I am. Played back a rack. Also, I think that... Is that a thing where Asians aren't good tippers?

No, not at all. All right, all right. Yeah, and in fact, like... Give me some races that aren't. Do you have... You have... Racism in your head that won't tip? What are we doing?

We don't say it out loud. This is like the water in the pizza. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that's not true either. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But yeah, but anyway. Racism is what that. The reason why I do it.

That's talking about Italians. Yeah. The reason why I do it is because I usually do it in this circumstance if I know I'm going to be back there. Right. So I'll give them like 100% and go, next time, treat me better. You say that to them? No, but that's, that's, that's. inferred in the tip.

Because that's going to go around, hey, Bobby gave 100% tip, and that's going to go to the kitchen. So when you do come back in, I don't know. I don't even know if that happens. Or they're going to be like, you believe this idiot. I fucking stiffed them, and he fucking hooked me about 100. Yeah. I forgot to refill his iced tea. Yeah, you do that.

It's more of me like, you know what? You're a jerk. But you know what? Were they jerks or just busy? I mean, dude, remember that guy? He took a fucking plate. A bowl of, like, steaming hot sundivu? Yeah. It threw it like a frisbee. He, like, slid the bowl across to Bobby like this.

Yeah. Like this. It's spilling over. I mean, it was just so rude. Aggressive. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's not how it's done. Yeah.

You know, I don't like that. Now, do you have a cap on what dollar that would be? Like, do you cap the $100? You're like, I'm not, you know. I think our bill was like, at what point do you like, all right, it's 50%. The most is 100. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So at 100, you'll do 100. No, but this, our bill was only like 50 something. And he tipped the guy. a hundred bucks and he put a little smiley face on the receipt yeah that'll teach him i like that yeah well they have to learn how do people learn but that's not the excuse you gave me your excuse was actually quite sweeter you said like i think he's having a really bad day oh so i was like yeah bobby yeah he probably was having a bad day yeah he because he was an older man remember yeah he just seemed really like disgruntled like he hated his life yeah yeah i was like that

I was brutal. Yeah. I was at the end of my career as a server. Brutal. Bitter, pissed, fucking angry. Yeah. Lazy as shit. Yeah.

What's the one question they would ask you that would send you over? Can you stop eating my cheeseburger? Sir, that's my appetizer? If you're fucking, people got a problem. Roaches in your coffee. The one question they would

asking me. Like, for instance, someone's like, well, what do you like here? What would you have? What do you think about? You must know what's good here. Got that all the time. Oh, that's terrible. Yeah. And what would you say? Nothing. Really? Mm-hmm. Would you give me a scowl? No.

Raw. I'll be right back with your cheeseburger, sir. That's even better. You just said that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. You know what they got with it? What? Spit. I never did anything like that. No, it's not that.

People are just, people just think there. You know, they're in their own head. Europeans are brutal, you know? Oh, they are. Yeah. But they just don't know. Yeah. You know?

Yeah, they don't tip. Australia don't, you don't. Well, Australia is not a tipping culture because they're, um, they pay their servers like $30 or more an hour. I know, it's not about that. It's that, I get that. That's why we do it in America to supplement their income. Yeah.

But that doesn't mean you can't make a fucking gesture. Yeah. I think so. I agree. And when you come over here, they fucking know. They fuck. I got to push. We've had this conversation. I have to push back. My wife is German and her mom was like, why do we have to tip? I'm like, that guy's making like $2 an hour. And she was like, that should be illegal. I'm like, yeah, no, everybody's kind of agrees on that. Yeah. So the second, they had no idea. Because to them, their servers get $15, $20 an hour. Yeah. So it's like you just tip a dollar or way. They know. Yeah. Is there a pamphlet? They know. When you come to America, like this, these are the rules? This is a tipping nation. Yeah, we're a tipping nation. At this point, they should. Like, they should know.

They know. They got streaming. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They should know. They should know. They're doing on purpose because they're going to be back here. They don't give a fuck. I think they know they should tip.

I don't think they know why they should tip. Like, they're not aware that the employees are not making. I was over in fucking Paris. I was breaking off fucking franks to everybody. So it makes sense. Yeah. And were they appreciative of it or no? Awesome.

Yeah. The only two things you got to do. when you go to France is attempt to speak French, okay? Walk up to them, don't say, hey, where's the Burger King? Pauly-vous-Francet? Or Pauly-vous-en-Gle? So you're going to say. Right. And they love it. And if they don't speak French, they'll figure it out. If they do speak French, they'll fucking go to bat for you. I had this lady

at the fucking Eiffel Tower. I did that. She walked us all the way up. Wow. Hattie, too. Hey, dumb. Yeah. You know what? I'm going to take a French class if I ever go to France. I would love to speak French. Bradley Cooper speaks French. I know, he's so good. I didn't have fucking guy.

That guy. Good look. Hung out with him one day at the restaurant that I worked at. No. Yeah. Good night. Sweetheart. Yeah.

He grew up in a couple towns over. Wow. He went to the private school in our area. Wow. The one thing he did say to me is we're about the same age and he knew kids in our school would get recruited that were really good at La Crosse would get recruited to like these private schools in Philly. And there was this kid, Kurt Mueller, shout out to him. that was at our school that went there

and they remembered him. I was like, yeah, I played the cross together. And I was about this size. And Bradley Cooper went like this. He used to play the cross? Really? Yeah. Wow.

But, yeah. You think he would remember you or no? No. Yeah, yeah. But now you guys, though, you guys are now in the stratosphere of you're getting some big people. Yeah.

Yeah. It's going well. We're trying to expand a little more. I mean, we've had a lot of the big. big comedians. There's a couple we haven't had that we would like.

Yeah. So you guys, it's one of the best podcasts in the world. It's called Are You Garbage? Thank you. We love them.

They're family to us. We love you. Yeah, you've had Gary V. Jordan Jensen. Is you a good guy? Kumel Nunjani.

Dude, you're getting the big ones, dude. Yeah. Gerbys. There's Gerbys. Hugeies, dude. Yeah.

Wow. We're, we're expanding out doing more, you know, trying to get more musician, you know, just more other people, but like not everybody's good at podcasting as you know that, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it's like we're trying to, we're trying to, we're trying to, see how fat I was in that one at the top? The credit card for all right there. Yeah. I was a big boy. You were saying that I wasn't fat. No, yeah, yeah, you were pretty fat. Trying to get some Muppets. We've been trying to get Muppets.

Oh, Muppets is good. Yeah. There, is that your new studio? Yeah. Yes. You got to come by, come hang out. No, I haven't been there. You don't call, you don't tech. I haven't been in New York since the last time I saw you. The kid's been there. Who? Oh, yeah, I know. San Diego's been out there. You haven't been in New York?

I don't like it there. What are you talking about? I don't like it. I like it. Yeah, it's not my city. That's got nothing to do with it, whether you like it or not. I've never hooked up with a girl in New York. Oh, that's what.

I think that's what it is. I don't think they like me. No. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. What are you talking about? Yeah, one time I was walking down the street with this guy, and we were going to watch the Avengers movie. Which one?

Avengers 2. Angel Ultron. Age of Ultron. Wow. You're really quick. Really quick. James Spader did that voice so well. And this model came up to my friend and got...

Model. Supermodel. Supermodel. We would know her? No. But she was... Looked like it. Uh-huh.

So she's not... Not a model. Not a supermodel. She looked like it. Hot chick. I'm with you on this one. Everywhere in New York. Let me start the story over.

Go ahead. A really hot chick. Mm-hmm. If I love to feel better? Yeah. Okay. And she walked up to my friend and goes, hey I just broke up with my boyfriend

I think you're hot you want to fuck No way I swear to God So he was like a super good looking guy Yeah and my buddy goes See you later dude So I watch Avengers alone

I've never gotten I'd never go back to New York either If that was the kid Yeah Most people Have you ever gotten there Like a freebie like that No

Have you ever gotten a freebie Not like that What's a freebie? A freebie is you don't even know Their name You got one Yeah you come on I guess I have

tell you how you got one. Remember, she was like, my car broke down. Can I go home with you? Jesus. Oh, yeah. And what will make her name? Do you remember? I do remember.

And she lived with you for like two weeks. That's right. What? You shacked up? It didn't happen to me. She was really high. I forgot about her. That's a lottery.

And you weren't even working at this time. I wasn't even working good. I was just like a comeback, you know? Good for you. Say something else, me, Norm. You're right. I forgot about that. That was a fucking gift. But then it all backfired because what happened was he eventually fell in love and then he realized, remember one of your friends was like, hey, dude, that girl you're with, don't bring her to the club anymore.

And I go, why? Because that guy had a girlfriend. So I was just going, why, dude? He goes, I'm bringing my girlfriend to the club. I go, what does it matter if you bring your girlfriend? I can't bring the girl I'm saying. He goes, I'm fucking her too, dude. Oh, wow.

And then I turned to her after the call. you go, are you having sex to so-and-so? And she goes, yeah. How many cars do you have? And I go, who else? And it was just like, you know, the Dead Sea Scrolls.

Damn. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow. But that's still a freebie. That's still a freebie. It's still a freebie. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a freebie for everybody, though.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't like, I want freebie for me. Potluck. Yeah, yeah, it was a potluck freebie. Yeah. But she was very, very beautiful. I remember that. I completely forgot about her.

See? Thanks for bringing that. You're right. There was another, I'll give you another one then. She was beautiful, but she had no moral, so,

you know, that's, you know her? No, she doesn't. It was, it was his way of trying to slam me.

No, it was it. But it came out so poorly. Because of the periscuous sex. Yeah. Yeah? Are you a religious man? No.

Okay. You just think there's got to be a deep connection. Yes. So I was at a coffee being. Okay. Okay, with my friend Ahmed.

We have enough of this with him. Yeah. The pain to express. Go ahead. What? you should go back to New York I thought he was saying that to Foley I was like, jeez, forget the story

No, no, stop, come on, how many times have you? I interrupted you too But I interrupted you too How many times are you going to interrupt me, man? When I was over there He was saying something positive You should go back to New York I'm telling a story, New York

Go New York I think you should do Broadway You go New York I am I think you should do Broadway I'm not doing Broadway, do Why? Yeah, yeah

I think you're right How many times? What? All right. Wait, can I just say something? Yeah, go ahead. You're already going to do it anyway. I was in New York, right?

Oh, my God. This better be good, dude. It's not going to me. It's going to be. I ran the Manhattan Bridge twice. Wow. That's pretty good. And I walked it at 12 a night, which was dangerous.

Chick walked up to him. It was a homeless lady. Yeah? Yeah, she was chasing me. That's why you were. were running? No. I run it three times. So you won't have sex with somebody? You have sex with a homeless lady?

I don't know. Huh? He was just saying he walked across a lot. Okay. It was 12 on night. What he's doing on a bridge at 12 at night? Taking pictures of the skyline? Oh yeah, he's a photographer. He's a photographer. All right. You're doing your art. I'm sorry. Where are you staying? And Williamsburg.

You a Ralph? No, just me. I'm staying with another comic. Nice. Shout to. Julio Diaz. Ah, Julio Diis. So, Kiv, you've never had a free... Very funny.

Not like that, no. I mean, uh, I never had the body type where a woman would just be like, let's go back to your place. Uh, uh,

so yeah, now that I have some sort of notoriety, I'm married, so yeah, yeah, yeah. Be you fan of it? No, probably not. Anyway, let's move on. No, not really. Uh, no, my wife is like,

attractive. She is. So it's like very like... Nice lady. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We had sex, and I was like, I don't go anywhere ever.

Oh, that's what I want to meet. I want to meet somewhere of like, okay, I just, this is, I want, don't go anywhere else. Sure. Well, I also just, it was mostly like I wasn't going to get a girl hotter than her. So I was like, let me just, let me lock it in. Oh, I see, I see, I see. You don't think?

I don't know. Yeah, you have like a kind of an Owen Wilsony kind of. I love this podcast, by the way. No, you do. You have a little kind of, what, quirkyish. Okay. Women love guys like you. You're saying you got a weird nose.

A fucked up voice. No, yeah. Okay, that's a stretch, but I'll take it. No, there's a little bit, do the face. Oh. Yeah, there we go, dude. I see it. I see it, too.

I see it. Right, a little bit in the nose, right? Anyway, okay, yeah. Yeah, but no, no real freebies. Yeah. I don't even want to tell my coffee to be one, because you're not doing it. It's not even a good one, though.

Did you, is it a freebie? You hook up with a girl to coffee bean? It was a freebie. I've had two freebies. It was a second freebie. Had a coffee bean during the day? What? Which one was the coffee bean on?

I was with Ahmed Amen. I was wearing red shoes. Uh-huh. The Velcro kind. Okay. You know, and I was sitting cross like this. Yeah. And this beautiful blonde comes up to me and she goes, I like your shoes.

I think from Japan. And I don't know. And I looked. I took it off. No, but I am. And there was like some Japanese writing. And she goes, yeah, those are the son, some, so. She like knew the shoe.

And then she goes, hey, You're cute. And I go, oh, thank you. You're very beautiful. You know what I mean? She goes, and she goes, come over tonight. Let's hang out. She gave me her address.

This is, um, white lady? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. And I went over there and oh, my God. Praise the Lord. She stole my shoes. Jesus Christ. What?

You hooked up her? Yeah, she stole my shoes. Yeah, no, we did the whole thing. The whole thing. The whole shebang. Yeah, the whole shebang. But that was my only second free of me in about the life. And that was it?

Yeah. Wasn't there another white girl who was, like, obsessed with? with, like, kung fu. I fetishize you a little bit. Yeah, she fetishized, she absolutely fetishized you. I've had a couple of girls that were obsessed with kung fu, though. You break this board before we have... You went to the house, she had bamboo, and, like, a, like, entered the dragon.

That's a little weird. Yeah, yeah. Did the lady in the coffee mean know who you were? No, this is pre-fame. Really? Yeah, it was pre-fame, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I was still on Matt TV. Okay.

Yeah, okay That's pretty famous What? You're famous? That's not famous Yes, it is In the 90s? Okay, anyway

You're talking about Anyone when you promote You want to promote something? Yeah, we're on the road To back on the block tour All tickets available are available at RUGGGG com

We each We each do stand up And then we close out Playing AYG with the crowd We've got a special Document like a documentary we did Route 66 Tour bus

crew we did like I think it was like 10 cities and 10 days type deal kind of good and that's all up on used too for free yeah yeah all right give them around love you guys Wow! Woo! I don't know who canny is makabolololid Oolong kaiyamadomadomobuki, y'u'i-do-i-do. Shukuluki-mooki-mooki-mooki-mooki-mooki-i-a-o-o-i-i-o-i-i-do-i-o. Thank you.