TigerBelly - Bobby is Diagnosed With Baby Girl Legs

Episode Date: September 16, 2026

TigerBelly is in Hawaii for a family episode with Bobo, Khaloko, Jules & Gilbo. We chat lighter side quest, vandalism department, Gilbert’s upcoming amateur MMA fight, Volcano Santa, Lollipop physique, baby girl legs, Planet Fitness, Mulan City, ant-infested revenge, and Disney princess knowledge.Head to www.acorns.com/TIGERBELLY to claim your $20 bonus today.Prizepicks. Download the app today and use code TIGERBELLY to get $150 instantly in Lineups if you win your first $5 Lineup!Download Cash App Today: https://capl.onelink.me/vFut/p06g4a8g #CashAppPodCash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. Cash App Visa® Debit Flex Cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC, and The Bancorp Bank, N.A., pursuant to a license from Visa U.S.A. Inc. See terms and conditions for the Sutton prepaid card, Sutton debit flex card, and Bancorp debit flex card. Cash App Green features, Savings, Direct deposit, Round ups, Overdraft coverage and Discounts provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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I don't know where I'm going. Every word I say, my mind is going, what is the next word here? I'm not formulating any idea. I'm just talking out of my ass. Okay, you want to count one to ten with Tito Bobby? Okay, ready? Ready for him? One.

Wait for him. Okay, go one. Two. Three. Three? Three. Four. Four.

Five. Five. Six. Six. Seven. Seven. Eight. Nine.

What's next? Ten. Ten. Yeah. I only learned that three years ago. So you're well ahead. I love you. Can you teach, can you teach Tito Bobby how to do an

Shaka? I love you. Yeah, change his name for the podcast. Yeah, change his name. What's his name today? Slong. No, no, no. No.

That was weird. That was weird. Why did you say swat and child? I don't know. It's good improv, right? No. What's it? I'm going to start the show now, right?

Okay, go ahead. Why Geli Khoa lo, pottoyo. La Kuiwikinia, oh, ha, ha. Wine music is the most peaceful music ever. It really is. We've been listening to it all day, my girlfriend and I, and we really believe in it. That in religious music.

We listen to some religious music today, too. Like worship? Moro. Yeah, but Jesus, hold me in your arms forever. Which, which. is a nightmare. To be held in Jesus' arms forever. For eternity?

How do you hold each other? Front to front? Eternity. Do you want to come? Okay. No one cares. No one cares. They're babysitting.

Yeah, yeah. This is, let's start from the top. Walkaliki, oh, higher. Sing with Tito Bobby. Bye. You want to sing with Tito Bobby? Yeah, he's scared.

Anyways, I don't have child care today. Okay, okay. Thank you guys for allowing my baby on set. Okay. How are we doing this? Appreciate you being here. What's something that you know he's going to watch this back? I hope he doesn't.

But when he's older, let's create a time capsule for him. You know you look like Volcano Santa. That's your name, Volcano Santa. You heard him? What? Mr. Lava Lava. Mr. Lava. I'm going to say that.

I'm going to call them that from here on out. Okay, so let's start from the top now. Okay, let's start. Wakaliki, Hawaii. Well, let's go around in the room. Everyone do a verse. Oh, no. You don't like that?

Why don't you guys do improv? It's hard. It's hard to pod when you don't do improv. I'm doing all the improvising. A religious one. Yeah, religious. I'm okay to mock religion, but not the Hawaiian language, if that's okay. Oh, is that what I was doing?

Yeah. I was playing homage to it. I have a deep connection to the islands, to be honest. Where are you going? Away from you. You're smelling. Do you smell? It turns out I like it better here.

Do I smell? No, you don't smell at all. You don't smell. That's Julius's accusation, not mine. Okay. He smells like cigarettes right now. Yeah. He was not a lighter way.

Why? What happened? Well, I'll tell you what happened. And I wasn't going to bring it up, but I'd like to bring it up. Can I give you, let's see if I'm in the bad? Yeah, yeah. If I'm in the wrong. Okay.

Let's hear it. Because, you know, I'll tell you a little backstory about how, not backstory, but what I believe. Okay. I believe when you meet a person for the first time or a stranger, the last thing you want to do is deceive. Okay? And when I came in here, this guy, Sean, that runs this building,

deceived me. How so? I'll tell you. I'll tell you, show you. I'll tell you. I show you tell you. I show you tell you. I like the way you said.

Okay. You want to know? Uh-huh. I show you, tell you. Okay. You sound like my son right now. You have the same language. Yeah.

I'll tell you show you. I, we like it. It's fine. Carry on. Can we not do this right now? Like, can I finish the story? Yeah, yeah. Sorry.

Okay. Jules. Get it together. You get it together. Do you go to the boiling crab? No, I've never been. Okay. So anyway,

um. ADHD here, dude. So I come, I, I've been smoking cigarettes again. Boo. Everyone, boo. And so we didn't have my lighter. But in my mind, I'm like, I'm going to a studio. They must have a lighter.

They must. Why? We have lighters in our studio. For who? Off because you're smokers. No, but we just, wait, how many lighters do you think we have in our house? I think we have like 50. Yeah, we have like 50.

50 to 60 lighter. She's laying around the house. Yeah. Yeah. So anyway, I asked this guy, Sean, I go, do you have a lighter? And he looks around. He goes, no, bro. I go, look more.

Look a little more. He looked in that drawer. He goes, no, bro. Sean, come over here. I want to see you. Did you help him? No, so this is what that. This is what, is Sean?

He's not coming out. John? He's scared. He's nervous. Sean. Just there right there. I like you, man. But check it out.

So I go, no, you hear the story. You know what I mean? So I go, where can I get one? He goes, H-Mart. That's out of your mouth, right? So I get in the car, right? I go to the car. We go all the way to H-Mart.

All the way, it's a block from here. To me, it felt like an eternity. Okay? So we had, then you and I had a little bit of a parking situation at the H-March. March. We're kind of arguing, bickering about, like, where to park. She won't park in the handicap for a second. Oh, you're driving this princess around?

No, he's driving, but he pulled into the handicap while I'm not sitting in the car. Oh, that's true. Yeah, I hear you. So you're putting her in a situation. What you do, if you get caught, you have to act, whatever you choose that you're handicapped is. I'd go blind. All right, stuff, dude.

What you're doing is funny. Anyway, we go to, so. So we, that situation, I run in, right? Which, I'll be honest with you, I had to go the other way around. It was a long run. It's a big building. It is. You're going to just ask someone?

So anyway, I get to the first. Jules. Jules? All right, I get in. She wanted beverages. I went and got beverages. I went to the cashier. I go, where are you liars?

He goes, we don't have any matches, no matches. Number one, lie. Okay. So then we go to 7-Eleven. Yeah, right here. Yeah, I know. I see. She goes in.

She comes out. She goes, the line's too long. Oh, whoa, whoa. You know why? Because they have the new egg sandwiches from Japan. Is that what that is? Yeah, from Japan. It just arrived.

I was going to. Yeah, it's really, really a hot commodity right now. We got to get an egg sandwich. We got to go back and get eggs. I'm being real. I love lines. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. So there's no. So then I go.

I just look at my girlfriend, I go, um, you know what? I'm going to go up back to the studio and I'm going to demand a source of fire. Did I not say that? I keep me in hot. I go, someone needs to provide me a source of fire right now. You're like scratching. Angry.

Angry, like angry, right? And then Sean goes, well, here. And he hands me a yellow lighter. Where's a yellow lighter at? Go get it. Evidence it. Yeah, get the Lord. Yeah, so.

What the fuck, Sean? You made me go to A-smart, the 7-E-E-E-11, and do this whole fucking thing, and you had it in your pocket? You could have gotten an egg sandwich. You could have. He almost sent you on, like, a price. Yeah. Yeah. A side quest?

Anyway, I don't need an apology. I don't need one. I don't need an apology. I don't need a handshake. I just want to plead with you, Sean. You want to pee with him? Plead. Oh.

I pee with him. That's not weird. Alex and I pee together. Side by side or like criss-cross? Both. Yeah. We do a combo. Do you sit on his lap?

Sean, what are you going? Oh, so you want to stand there still? Yeah, so Sean. No, because I have to plead with him. Okay. May I plead? Yeah. Okay.

we've been here before the last time we did right I'll see you again wait he wasn't here last time it was Ozzy Oh fuck my that's really rude Oh wow Oh wow No no

I want an apology first and then I'll apologize You do want one Yeah I do want one oh for sure So I'll apologize I apologize for mistaking you for another Hawaiian Okay And then What does that mean

You are forgiven? I am forgiven. Thank you. Sorry. Sorry for hiding the light. Hiding the fire. Now we're, now, this is how nations grow. This is how nations connect.

Okay. Thank you so much. You can sit back down to shine if it makes it feel comfortable. Thank you, Sean. Thank you, Sean. You're the best. Now, can I ask you something? Yeah.

Who sat on you on this? You're going to take, I know you're going to take Sean's side. I'm curious to see what angle you take, both of you, where it's my, where it's my fault. I did okay yeah here's a thing it's where I find it difficult

and like to really kind of feel bad for you is that both 7-11 and H-Mart are literally 0.01 distance from here okay so my girlfriend made that made that case she says why are we driving

we gonna walk when I had Sean come over here Sean come back Sean come back all right Sean, you're the one that said to get in the car to go to H-Mart. Did you not? I said you could log, but... Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Thank you, Sean. Okay. So, yeah, we could have walked. You could have went to the Kalai's place, too. I know, we grew up. I don't have fire there. I do have lighters there, yeah. We have candle.

Do you know that Jules just has a random birthday candle in her purse? From who? And I'm like, are you smoking crap? What are you doing with that? No, just in case there's a birthday. No, that's not why. That's not why. I swear. I don't do anything with it.

But he came in clutch last night because it was my best friend's daughter's birthday and we were scrambling and we were like, is there a candle in the house? Jules was like, I think I have one in her purse and she just pulled it out. That's insane. You just have that in your purse. Yeah, I thought so too. Yeah. What's also strange having in your purse?

like Chinese star that's not strange like Jackstones yeah Chinese star would be struck no Jackstones what's Chinese star that weapon when you throw it you know what a Chinese star is

what Chinese star I was thinking more like what Chinese star why yeah you don't have to be Chinese when you say Chinese star why Chinese star because you went from like birthday

candle I was thinking more wholesome and so I wasn't thinking like weapon. I think we're off the tracks here. Who keeps the Chinese star? I know, I was trying. I need to explain to people what was going to happening here, okay? I'm being, I'm taking a, she had a random candle in her purse, right?

So I'm thinking of other things that are random that would be in a purse. I see. That would be odd. You know what I mean? So I was just throwing things out there. And then you go, who Chinese da? I didn't. Yeah, yeah.

And then I was like, I don't know what is going on. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I took us off. I took us off track. You took off out of Strattaghan. What's going on here today? I can't even speak right now.

Yeah. Because I'm so frustrated. I was really asked. You were. I was so frustrated about this lighter predicament. Yeah. I just have to wind down. Oh, yeah.

You get like moody. I get moody. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I still think it's your fault and it's not Sean. Yeah, but why? Tell me why? Well, in the house, we have like 60 lighters and you keep losing every single one of them. Also, like, as a smoker, why don't you have a lighter on you?

Yeah. Okay, I was in a rush Okay, we rushed out, okay I'll tell you another I'll tell you another reason why Okay, okay, we were rushing Because we're having A hotel problem

Uh-oh That's one of the best hotels We go there two or three times a year It's my favorite hotel in the whole world Right? But, uh, we got a letter there night Uh-oh, uh-oh Yeah

And the letter was there's some complaints. You always have Hawaii hotel complaints. I know, I know. We gotta stop this. Sexual noises.

Sexual noises? No, it's not. Smoking again. Let me guess. It's smoking on the balcony. Smoking on the balcony. Oh, damn it. So it got to the point

where they sent us another letter and they charged $400. Yeah, you don't give a shit. I don't give a shit. But I do care. That's crazy. What? I do care.

It's very crazy. I don't know what camera to look at. I'm going to turn to it. So say your lie. Okay. Okay. But you don't give a shit. What was my line?

But I do care. I do care. I do care. Ready? Yeah. So you don't give a shit. I don't know why I can't do it. Do it.

Ready? Right? Yeah. But you don't give a shit. Let's not do it. But I do care. Okay. Okay.

I need a line reading. All right. Go. You've got to be quick, though, okay? Yeah. But you don't give a show. I do care. Ah, no.

I'm a squirrel. Oh. Saving my money. I'm a squirrel. What? Eight corns. Eight corns, baby. Eight corns, baby.

Eight corns, baby. Get it in my cheeks. Listen, listen, the honest truth, right? When I was a young guy, dude, I had spirit change. I had things, and I just would waste my money. Of course. And I regret not having, like, any kind of investment. Yeah.

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Because you don't mean it. I'm not a good actor. You know why? Because you don't care. I'm not a good actor. No, it's because you don't care. I just realized I'm not a good actor. No, it's because you literally don't care.

You're telling a lie is why it's not coming out. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's move up. How about this? I will do it. Can we do it later? Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Let's revisit it. I want to know, are you getting kicked out of this one? No. Bobby, this you cannot get. This will be the third one. No, because they did something also bizarre. Can I tell you the bizarre It was bizarre

Okay So they charged me the thing Right But the thing is the same day They go we have a surprise for you Right And I think it was like The surprise is get the fuck out of our hotel

Yeah But it wasn't They came in With the most beautiful cake Oh A birthday cake With my face on it The hotel did

Yeah But there's different sections of people in the whole department. Yeah, they don't speak with one another. I want the smoking department or whatever, right? Link up. The vandalism department.

And link up with the cake department, the bakery. Yeah, the kitchen, yeah. And to see if there can be some information, Bobby Lee's staying up there. Yeah, the kitchen and vandalism need to be communicating. They need to be communicating. Yeah, yeah.

I wouldn't call it vandalism, but, you know, I don't think it's vandalism. Wow, okay, like, what is it? What is it, Gild? Not loitering. Law and order. So my manager's in town. She's in the same place, right?

She smoked in her balcony. And some guy in the next balcony goes, I'm trying to enjoy my view! And she put it out, right? Yeah. I have to say that that guy's in the wrong. Why? Because she's not on your patio.

If it's a non-smoking building. He probably can't breathe. It's not outside. It's not inside. It's not smoking. The lanai is part of the hotel. That's still its property. Okay.

It's a non-smoking property. Why are you doing this with your hands? I don't understand what you're doing. Yeah. Are you in the Illuminati? You know what's going on? I just will never defend smokers. So it's always, you're always a problem.

Okay, so what's the problem? Yeah. It's you guys are sensitive. Get your lungs right. Get your lungs right. And then I can do second hand. He's getting cocky about his lungs. Yeah, yeah.

But anyway, um. And so like, how are you going to remedy it? Are you going to walk downstairs now, or are you just going to keep doing? No, so today, the reason why we were a little late is we did a full-blown cleaning. Hands and knees. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But him too? Both of us.

Oh, I got towels. I wet them. Yeah. I'm mopping. Yeah, yeah. And now you get the vandalism department a cake. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah. The vandal. All right, get him a cake. Vandalism department. Yeah. Just figure out a different word for it, but maybe. Yeah, I don't like that. Because I don't think it's vandalism.

I don't think what I'm doing is vandalism. Do you think it's vandalism what we're doing? I think we're on vacationism. That's what it is, vacationism. Anyway, yeah, so, but everything's fine because we're now moving hotels tomorrow. Yes. Yes.

But you know what? Can I just say? Yeah. That hotel is the exact same hotel just on a different part of the island. So the rules, same rules apply. No, it doesn't. Because I'm going to, I know this for a fact. back, right? The two vandalism department, the both hotels have, they don't communicate.

I know that, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And also the bakery department don't communicate with each other, right? So it's like, I don't think there's a, there's no process with that. May I also just warn you ahead of time? Because I was just at this hotel that you're moving to. It's very windy. There's a nice breeze. So that smoke is going to travel fast to the next balcony. Good. Good. Not to the next balcony. Not away. No, that's going to go to them. Yeah, yeah. Okay. I'm not afraid.

And I'm going to stand here and fight for my right. Okay? What I'm saying is that, I don't know what I'm saying. Let's move on. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know what I'm saying. But I'm really.

Sometimes I, everyone listening right now, sometimes I don't come here prepared, obviously. Right? I don't know the English language that well. I mix up words. You know what I mean? Yeah. But I commit. Okay.

And it's like, so today, I don't know what I'm doing. It was a good morning. You got, you had your, you went to breakfast with everyone. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, have you been to Cocoa head cafe. No. Yeah, you have. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. There's no loco moco. There's a cocoa moco.

Yeah, it's a cocoa moco. It's a cocoa moco. Okay, Coca-moco, yeah. Yeah. All right. You got me there, pal. Okay. You got me.

So, how are you enjoying the Hawaiian life? How are you asking? Ask Jules first. How are you enjoying Hawaiian life? She used to have a local BF. I remember that. I don't think they're... You remember? Does BF mean man friend that plays volleyball?

No. That's ESA. That's, yeah, geez. That's a high schooler, Gilbert. Get your mind right. No, she had, yeah. Remember slong? One of my fucking fucked up in-profits.

Okay, let's get back to... Ask Jules first. How's your Hawaiian life? It's been fine. I've been waking up at 6 a.m. For what? Because... Sorry.

Because, um, shlong. Oh, yeah. Had been waking up early as well. Can I address that with you? What? And I have to put my foot down. Oh, shit. Oh, shit, dog.

I have to draw a boundary. Okay. Calla look at me. You're sucking her youth away. You and ask her for this guy. You and Esther Provensky is sucking the life out of this girl.

Babesiting the kids. Her two kids. Your kid. Constantly. Constantly. They're paying me, though. I know, but I pay, I said I pay you triple for not to go. When she goes, dude, when she goes to, I have cash. When she goes, she's like, I'm going to babysit.

I got, what are they paying you? This amount? I go, I'll give you three times the amount to stay home. And she goes, I, you're never going to make it. you have to be frugal you should stay you just you just want me to stay inside the house and never go out because of the dogs the dogs are fine i want you to watch the dogs you have to watch something i know we love the animals i just would do things differently number one all right more treats no no more treats i'm so sorry yeah yeah yeah they anytime anytime you hang out with them they are they have diarrhea Good.

And they get so fat. When something comes in, they has to come out. I don't like, lady is like a completely different breed now. Completely different breed now, yeah, yeah, yeah. She's so fat. I love it. Lady, like, more treats.

Hates you. No, she loves me. She only loves you because of treats, but without the treat, she doesn't love you. Oh yeah, that's conditional. And she really doesn't love you. And she loves you? Oh, yeah.

You abandoned her. How, I rescued her. I know, but then you left her. What do you mean? I gave her a home to live in from the shelter of Downey. What are you talking about? Okay. First of all.

First of all, what? I rescue the dog. Are you Sean White? Why were in those sunglasses? Oh, because it's like I have a period migraine. Oh, she has. You too? Are we synced?

Oh, sorry. Is that information? I'm sorry. That's weird. I'm so sorry. I apologize. You on blast real quick. Oh, okay.

Yeah. It's coming soon. Jesus, Bobby. Do a theater new year near? What? Let's figure. Let's figure out what he was trying to say. Yeah, yeah.

Okay, I think he was trying to say. Yeah, yeah, yeah. A theater new year. Let me see, a theater new year. Yeah. What's your guest, Jules? I have no idea. It's a theater near you.

That's what he was trying to say. Oh. A theater near, no, new year. I don't know what I said, though. You said theater new year. Yeah, theater new year. Well, Bobby cannot be left alone with them for even two minutes. He freaks out.

That's why he wants Jules and honey to never leave the home. When she leaves now, can I imagine, may I? Jules said something about you recently that I'd like for her to say to your face, which is what is Bobby's most favorite thing on earth? You love to be pampered. You love someone to, like, clean your ass. You love someone to feed you. Interesting.

To cook for you, to boil you eggs. Bore me eggs, yeah. To, yeah, slaves. Yeah. It's crazy, dude. It's crazy. Yeah, and I'm going to defend myself. You know what I mean?

You like to yell at them? Them, what you mean them? Slaves, us, me. You're not a slave. She goes, us, me and mama. She's slayed, but you in slavery. I don't. Be honest. Be honest. Who put you in slavery?

You started it and ask that you're going to kick us out if we don't do anything you want. Boil eggs? Yeah. Yeah, I love eggs. You know this, right? I love it. I love the different variations of it. But you got to like jewels.

Hard boiled. You know what I mean? You know what I mean? I like it fried over hard. I love varieties of it. The white part, the yellow part. Sometimes I combine them. But why do you crash out if she has to leave the house?

Yeah, you crash out. It seems to be like that's a problem. Because I don't like, here's what I don't like. Be honest. This is a podcast of honesty. Okay? When you come home, the dogs are out already, right? Why?

Because they're with me. Well, you care now, but before you didn't. Okay, that's not, no. I couldn't stand it. I can't stand it. So I'd rather have them hang out with Papa. Okay. So I can give belly rubs and mouth kisses.

Yeah, for like 30 minutes. And then you're done. Throw balls. I do all that. Yeah. I don't throw balls. I don't know. I've never seen you throw balls.

Who buys balls? He does buy balls. Yeah, but he doesn't, how many balls are by balls? How many balls are my balls? How many balls are my balls? He don't throw the balls. I said, I know how to throw a ball.

You just buy the balls. It's in the Asian regime. We know how to do it now. Okay. So what I want to say to you is this, okay? I think this happened 4th of July. I do remember. Yeah.

was just one time. The dog forgot. So this is, my new trick is this, right? What she does is she leaves the dogs in the spare room downstairs. We have the podcast lobby room, right? So what I do now is I leave her door open. Okay. So the cats get in there.

And what do they do? They dry heave on your fucking bed, do they not? All over my bed and pillow. And then the ants, there was an army of ants. So much ants. On her bed. Eating all this animal, you know what I mean? Waste that was on her bed.

And that was revenge. Okay? That's what happens. But then the whole house had ants. It's just not my room. I know. In your room? I know.

There was an infestation. It backfired. It backfired. It backfired. But you know my intention, though. My diabolical. You got to stop overfeeding the cats, too. That's why they keep puking.

Gooner demands it. Okay, listen, we have one life to live, right, Sean? We have one life to live, right? And these animals don't know, they don't know what a square is. Like, you can't go, hey, go, what's a triangle? They don't know things. That was a terrible thought. Yeah, they've never seen, you know what I mean?

The arrival. You know, like watch a movie, you know, they, yeah. All they know animals, right? What's so funny? I don't know where I'm going. Every word I say, my mind is going, what is the next word here? I'm not formulating any idea. I'm just talking out of my ass.

Okay? That's what I'm doing right now. But you get what I'm saying, right? I guess. Yeah. Animals need exercise, bond, companionship, and all that stuff. And you don't provide that lately. I provide it.

You don't. Yes, I do. You just come out like 30 minutes to chill with the dogs. and then you never see them again for the whole day. Who's out more? You are him. He says you go to rave. Him.

I haven't gone out to any raves lately. I go to raves. You go somewhere. I go to raves. You go somewhere. You know where I go? Where? To work.

So that we as a family. In the morning? In the afternoon. As a family, we can have lights. We can have electrolytes. Anything light. Anything light. You know what I mean?

Illuminating lights. You know what I mean? We have it all, okay? But because we have to work, Papa has to work, okay? And I come straight home with the animals. Anyway, let's move topics because it's like, anyway. Can we, I want to bring up something that's happening in a couple weeks, which is, I don't know if it's been announced yet, but.

Oh, yeah, this debacle. Sorry. So basically, I want to say this, okay, guys. You know. Don't reveal too much because I'm fine. Yeah, I'm not going to reveal too much. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm not going to reveal too much.

Okay. You do have a rib floating in fat. Wait, we should also just announce it. All right, so, all right, so Gilbert's doing his first amateur fight. MMA fight. I miss corner man. I'm walking him out. Oh, you're walking him out.

You're not corner man. I'm doing all of it, the jelly. I'm doing the jelly. You're the cuttman too? Yeah, yeah. Make sure the moth guards in. All right. So Gilbert, what's the date?

October 3rd. Ladies and gentlemen, on October 3rd, 2006, that is the day that Gilbert dies. All right? So we're going to have a funeral. That's it. That's the date. And I'm going to be there.

The reason why I'm there is because I'm going to save your life. but you're going to die out there, then they actually vet you, they actually look into like your martial arts background or are they just... All the coaches watch, so it's like, I'm not going to be going up against a D1 wrestler,

but... I don't know, I don't trust this. Yeah, I don't trust it either. Yeah. It's like if Tim Dillon goes, I'm going to go paragliding. I'd say, I'd be like, Tim, don't do it.

You know what I mean? I mean, you know, you can't do it. But paragliding, bucket list item. This is a bucket list, Brad William's going to do parkor. Why not? I think he can do parkour. Brad William.

Yeah. Yeah, over like a Lego house. He builds it first and he doesn't. Oh, not funny. All right. I can't make fun of little people. Sean, this is what we've come to, Sean. The little ones.

He's your friend. Are there little Hawaiians? Yeah, I'd love to be one. Yeah. Just one big flower on the. her face because the lay's so big, you know what I mean? Fuck, man. They come off the play, they didn't fucking lay this fat.

Wait, they don't have small heads. Yeah, big head. Oh, that's right. That's right. It's regular. Yeah, achondriplasia is. All right. You know what?

It didn't work. It got Gilbert to laugh. Yeah, it's funny. It got Gilbert to laugh, all right? You don't think it's fucking technical about it. The condition you're looking for is microcephaly. Yeah, yeah. I don't like this.

That's a mini head. Okay. Yeah. So I'm going to fight. I'm fighting. You guys are going to be there? Yeah, I'm like, my heart, my mommy heart is like, I'm anxious about it. But also, I have a lot of belief in you because I really do think you are, like, quite an athlete. Okay, okay.

Well, I have to say, the reason of what I'm going, and I'm going to say this right now, it's a fact. I'm going to laugh so much, right, that I could possibly die. Right? It's going to be the funniest thing to witness, right? To see your friend get obliterated. No skill set, just getting destroyed out there. Pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, right? And I'm going to be like,

this is the exact same thing he did to me when he forced me to do stand-up for the first time in front of 750 people. And then he... And you did it. Not only didn't you do it. But the fear, maybe he succeeded. That's why I'm doing this.

It's all psychological. You're going to win that. What's the hardest you've ever? Okay, I need to be. get clear on this. Are we wearing headgear? Oh, my God. Oh, my God, dude. Well, how many ounces? Six.

Okay. Okay. Okay. So, MNMA is four ounces. Yeah. Only two more ounces. Okay. And how many the rounds? This is good.

I've been training a lot of cardio. It's three rounds, two minutes each. Okay, two minutes, two minutes. I feel like you're going to die. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Thank you, Jules. Thank you.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Thank you, Jules. Oh, we're on the same. Both death. Yeah. Death. No. Alex and I both agree that I think that I know you guys think that Gilbert's body is weird.

But he- I want to say your opinion. I got big jeans. Does it work on my body type? It does. It actually does. It does. So much better, Guild.

The skinny jeans, I can't wear those anymore? No. No. Because you have deformed legs. Gil, can you knock me? You retire those other jeans? I mean, it's whatever you are happiest in, but this does look infinitely better. Yes, it looks better.

Also, it makes you, also, it makes you just more proportional overall. Yeah. Yeah. You know what I mean? I agree. You were looking a little bit like a lollipop. Lollipop. Lollipop.

Lollap. Do Gilbert Lollabate. I'm going to yell it. Lollipop. When they say you're down, we go, Lollipop! It's going to catch on. Wait a second, Gild. I do think you have like a sleeper body type, though.

You're like a... Yeah, the strength is, you know, within the fat. It is. It's deep in there. Yeah. The strength. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's deep in the fat.

You kind of like are like a fador. You know, like everyone came in thinking like who is this like chubby dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, fadour, okay. And he was in, yeah. So I believe in you. What's that guy, Louise? the boxer that got beat that English dude Ruiz

Who's that big English heavyweight Tyson Fury is the big big Walled Not him That's the other one Hanson Andy Ruiz Jr. when he beat who Yeah Anthony Johnson Yeah Anthony Johnson's what I meant

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Wait, and it's all the same rules apply, Gil? Yeah, just the only thing, which I hate is I can't elbow people to the head. I love elbowing people to the head. Oh, even standing you can't? Elbow the ribs. Oh, interesting. Yeah. Okay.

Okay. Who do you think that they would set me up with, do you think? 55 years old, 5-3. Brad Williams. No legs. No legs. I think you should do this at the end of the year. You should do the program.

I think you would destroy somebody, honestly. Another guy in his 50s. Imagine. And my size. Yeah, your weight. What weight would you want to fight at? Like, how much would you lose? 135.

You're going to get down to 135. Yeah, but Bobby, can I just say, I think you should go with someone bigger because 135ers are fast. Another guy in his 50s. A 55 year old that's 135. Is that how they match it up? Like age and skill. Okay.

Occupation. You might find like a Ceviche chef or something. Yes. A sevice chef. You keep saying saviche chef. Like you've said a... This is a Seventeen chef fighting at my team. That's why.

Don't see that again. Yeah. I think he only does a Vichet. It's like a dropping a name too. And also like... Yeah, I'm working with a saviche. He doesn't do anything else but Saviche.

That's dumb. It's weird, right? Broaden your horizon. His restaurant is called Saviche stop. Oh, okay. It's all he does. Yeah, do that. Yeah, I guess it's just Cevice.

It's called Cevice stop? Go check it out. Very good. Anyway, so what's concerning me about this fight, I'm thinking about it, but I have one problem, which is I had a doctor's appointment. I went and did a full-on doctor's exam. Blood work, lungs, the pathways in your arms. arteries on your side. Your arteries.

Coronary arteries in this area right here. And everything's pretty clear. Good. No. Then I did a bone density machine. Oh, that's right. And then I went into, you know what I mean, a proportional body mass machine.

Yeah. And then my doctor sat me down. He goes, bad news. Your muscles and your legs are atrophying. Yeah, he has a big. He goes, you have no muscle. You have no, your proportion. for your legs at your body is unsustainable.

Unsustainable. He goes, yeah. You're going to be able to not walk. And I have to lose my teeth too. So I don't know what's going to happen. I think all my teeth out there. You showed us your legs yesterday and they do look like really like baby girl legs. And you know what?

It is like my, I had an auntie. I think that her body type is probably what he doesn't want you to have. Which is what? I always thought she looked like a chicken. Yeah. Where she, like the bird legs just really skinny, but like really rotund up top. Yeah. But you're not rotund up top.

Yeah, go ahead. Rotund. I think a little bit right now. Yeah. Oh. Rotund up top. Yeah. Yeah.

Okay. Interesting. They want you to bit like have like muscle and like be proportioned. Listen, my blood pressure was good. Osteoporosis. My blood work is good. Yeah. Yeah.

So let's just, I just don't want any legs. So how do we fix that? He goes, you have to walk, you have to, you walk? I don't walk. You don't walk? No, I walk to the car. Yeah, yeah, no. No.

He has to do like load bearing stuff. You have to lift weights. Yeah. You have to do like hot girl squats, some like, you know. Just go to the gym with mama. Oh yeah, that's right. At any time fitness. Planet Fitness.

Yeah, I went to Planet Fitness. Remember? And I couldn't get any of the machines to work. What do you mean? No, I paid the thing. What do you mean? I paid the thing. I went, I paid the thing, the day pass.

I want to check it out. You know what I mean? I went in there, paid it, went into the area, and I went into a machine. And, you know, you stick your leg in here right here like this, right? Yeah. And then you stick your arm in another contraption. You hook onto here, right? And then you have another thing like this, right?

And then you do this, right? And it only works out this part of the fucking neck. So you come with me tomorrow to show me how to use all the machines. Yeah. And I tried to go with him. Because I already went there and I don't like, I don't like when machines are complicated. Okay. I don't, you don't even know how to head first.

I don't know how to get in this thing. What, the hamstring curl? Any of them. You know what I mean? Yeah. I'm using legs for arm things. Like they're like, what are you doing? I'm upside down, dangling from a fucking bench.

Press, like, what is going on here? I don't know how to use any of the machines. So it's like somebody has to go there with me and go, this is, don't put your head in there, dude. That's not a head thing. Why don't you just do like free weights. You don't have to use the machines. What's that?

Like a free mason? Is it a free mason? Yeah, it's exactly like free mason. Okay. Just like, you know, do some squats. Just load it up here and then squat down. Okay. I will.

But anyway, I need to work on, you know, a lot of things I need to work on. But everything else health-wise is good. Yeah. But I don't think, I mean, anyway. It's a roller coaster, huh, Sean? It's a roller coaster. It's a whole.

Oh. What does that mean? It's a song. Oh, okay. Hawaiian rollercoaster? Yeah. I don't know. Like, oh.

We'll sing it for me. Hawaiian roller coaster. There's no place I'd rather be. Then on a surfboard out at sea. Never heard of it. Oh, my gosh. Lilo and Stitch. Oh.

Yeah. I don't know. Let me see if I can sing it. There's a chant in the beginning. Here we go. Here we go. Don't do that. Don't do the top.

I'm doing the whole thing. I don't, can you not do the Alohae? I really have to do it. Okay. It's a part of the song. Aloha he, Aloha hey. Right? Aloha hey, Aloha hey.

I know Ike. Alohae A. I know Ike, a lower A. There's no place I'd rather be than all my surfport out at sea lingering in the ocean blue. If I had one wish come true, I'd surf till the sunsets beyond the horizon.

Okay, good? Yeah. Close? Yeah. Take over. I do. I waka, I like a little

waka, waka, walk, I'm not saying. But it's such a fun song. Am I going to get in trouble for that, Sean?

No. Okay, okay, okay. Yeah. Sorry, let's move on. I don't even know the song. I don't want to know it. But Lilo and Stitch,

I saw the blue guy. Yeah, yeah, he's fun. Yeah. You were driving on the billboard you see the little blue guy, you go, that's fun. I'll never see it, though.

Amy Hill's in the movie. What's, yes. What's your most favorite Disney character of all time? Oh, shit. Because I feel like Stitch is up there. The China woman from Milan? Milan?

Yeah, I love the China woman from Milan. Oh, her, yeah. I like her a lot. You know Milan is Jules' number one, Disney movie of all time. I like the skeleton Mexicans. Coco? Coco. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I like skeleton Mexicans. When they dress up in the little white, you know, with the skeleton masks. This lady's awesome. She's so funny. She is so funny. Who's that? The lady, oh my God. You just said she was your favorite.

from what? Milan. No, the main lady, the main girl. That's Milan? No. That's not Milan? Why couldn't you just say Mulan then? I said Mulan.

You said the Chinese lady from Mulan. Isn't the main girl a Chinese? Her name is Mulan. I don't know that. I thought it was a city. I thought Mulan was a city. All right? But this lady is funny.

I thought the whole thing was about a town. She's iconic. Okay, sorry. Let's move on. Anyway, don't think to ask me about, you know. But I don't know, I know much about Disney. I'll try to give you the information they do know. I know that Ariel.

Yeah. Yeah, she's the red-headed lady. Yeah. Let's see, the mermaid. Yeah. Okay. So that's good. Tick.

The beast. Yeah, name all the princesses. Actually, you name all the princesses. Oh, shit. White? Snow white. How about the one from Aladdin? Cinderella. What's Cinderella?

Cinderella. I don't know how to say it. Cinderella. What is it? Cinderella. Cinderella? No, what is it? Cinderella.

No, what is it? Cinderella. Cinqueena. Quincy. You can't even say Kinseñera either. It's Cinderella. Cinderella. Cinderella.

No, oh, fuck. Cinderella. Cinder, yeah. Cinderella. What did I say? I thought I said it In Atlanta Oh I said Atlanta Okay

Anyway I love her Who else I like the one with the long hair I think they all Yeah Untapped Oh Rupons Yeah

Uh huh There's no way I can do it I don't even know Okay Let me see I'll make it up if I don't know Okay Jesus Christ

All right So here we go We got The first one is snow white Second one is Cinderella The third one is Fuck dude

What movie Starts with a B Oh beauty And the Beast Oh What's her name? Starts with the B? Yeah.

Means pretty. Oh, you're bonita. It's Bonita, right? That's pretty. Is Bonita not pretty? It's pretty. So, okay. You're right, cut.

Yeah, yeah. So we'll pass. Okay, yeah. That's Bonita. That's Bonita. That's Bonita. That's the... That's Aladdin?

That's Aladdin. That's from Aladdin. What's her name, though? Give me the initial. A J, starts with a J. Jasmine. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. I've never seen that character before. A. Oh, yeah. What movie now? Sleeping Beauty. Okay, so which one? What are we pointing at now?

The Blondie. What's her name? What movie? Sleeping Beauty. Sleeping Beauty. Give me the initial. A. Oh, A.

A. Not Ariel. I don't know that one. You don't know? No one knows that one. Aurora. Aurora. Go to the polkaontas.

Yeah, that would. what the redhead is. Who's that? You just said it earlier. The lady with the long hair? Oh, you don't know her name. No. Well, you know the names.

You just don't know who it is. I know that she has long hair. It starts with an A also. The mermaid. The mermaid. Ariel. Okay. Oh, yeah.

That's the little mermaid? Yeah. Oh, I can't tell. Oh, that's one. That's one. That's Pocahontas, baby. Yeah. That's her.

Mulan. The city of Milan? That's her in Milan, dude. The city of Milan. Yeah. Vionse. Soul Yeah

No that's not The movie Soul That's not from the movie Soul What about the black jazz We just said Dude Dude I did a good guess

A black female character Soul Pretty good guess dude Give me that one Yeah The last hand drawn one Okay This is Chris's Tatian

Okay Okay That's her Rapunzel Yeah Okay that one You have to know her This is from Moana.

This is from Moana, right? Yeah. Yeah. And that's her name. That's her name, Moana. Yeah. Yeah. This is hard because it's not,

well, not popular. Yeah, it wasn't. It wasn't that popular, no. Jules probably knows. Merida? Mirida. Okay. From?

Brave. Brave, that's right. These two are very popular. Don't know. Who's it? Frozen. What? Frozen.

I never saw Frozen. It starts with an E. E. Evelyn. Okay, let's go with that. Yeah. And the other one, the sister? Give me, a.

A. Al-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a. Revelyn and Ali. Okay. What is it? Elsa and Ana. Okay, forget it. And then the last one, I've never seen that.

Southeast. No. Nobody saw it. Anyway, I'm kidding. It's a great movie. No one did see it. That's the thing. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry, guys. that you don't know Disney princesses? It's okay. I'm sorry that that that character didn't hit off. Oh, the Southeast Asian one? Yeah. That's okay.

Yeah. I think, you know, it's just, Disney's best era is not current. Not right now. Yeah, they're dropping the ball, huh? Yeah. Let's just start a new. Let's get rid of Snow White.

Let's get rid of Cinderella. Let's come up with our new, let's come up with our new characters for the future. What would she look like? What? Yeah. They only made one Wally movie. They did.

Was there only Wally one? That's it. I watch Wally all the time. It's so good. It's so good. I relate to Wally so much. Oh. I feel isolated.

I feel sometimes alone. You know what I mean? I just do. You know, it has nothing to do with, you know what I mean, the people. I know people love me and stuff. I just feel, I feel alone. Yeah. Yeah.

And, you know, know, that little cockroach. Mm-hmm. Yeah. That's probably, you know. Gilbert? No. Yeah, yeah, but you're not that cockroach.

I'm just saying you're my person that's with me. She's not Eve? Oh, she's Eve. She's Eve. Yeah, yeah, you're the cockroach. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. So anyway, I love Wally. You know what, which one I love growing up was brave little toaster. I love that movie. And then I like the Iron Giant a lot.

Iron Giant is great. Yeah. Classic. Really classic. Did you see Odyssey yet? We saw it together. Oh, that's right. I really liked it.

It was good. You never saw it. I don't see anything these days. Yeah. It sucks. What do you mean sucks? I have to see something like that. It must suck.

What do you mean? The Odyssey? Yeah, you're missing on a... Where is it going? You have to, watching the theater. You can't watch it in your house. It's one of those movies you have to watch it in the theater.

Yeah, but also, like, I'm not in a rush. Like, I'm seeing, like, the best movie of my life, which is, like, watching my son grow up. Oh, okay. Yeah. She, sir. What is it all mean?

56 now? Well, I expect real gifts, Because I feel like I'm very mindful and like really cool gifts. I usually. So I can't wait for my everybody here. They're real a gift from their heart. Not just going to a store. I want a specific thing where I go, oh, you're being mindful and you thought of me.

You want heart gifts. Yeah, but you just don't remember gifts. I do. Not really, Bobby. Yeah, I'm like an elephant with gifts. I don't think so. What's the one gift I spent the most money on for you? I remember.

I know what? The gaming chair. Nope. I do know. What is it? Was it? No, don't go, was it? If you know.

Yeah. I think it was the expensive slides. Thank you. I bought you Blair. It was great. I'll tell you gift that you gave me. That leather jacket from Golden Goose. That wasn't the most special one.

The most special. Was the alien with the alien. The alien baby from the razor head. Yeah. Yeah. Do you remember what Jules got you in? Sox. Ashtray.

I don't know. No thought. I was just say a companionship. There's no commandorship. There's no roommate. It's living with an aborition. I mean, a thought of a specter. You know what I mean?

Nothing. You know what I mean? I would love some life. How about an acknowledgement that I exist? I do acknowledge you. Like a good morning, Tito Bobby. Or, you know what I mean? It's always like, like this face of disgust.

You know what I mean? It's like, fuck you, you know? Yeah. What are some things he would like this? gift-wise so that we can all collectively... Well, that's the funny thing is I know you guys already have it for me because you guys already, you know what I mean?

Planned. You know, it's me. It's me, Bob. I deserve birth gifts too. So I'm just curious to see what everyone's going to get me. I can't wait. Right, Sean, you got something? You got the lighter? The lighter?

Maybe I'll give me the lighter. But yeah, that's what I expect. Your own creativity. Okay, so you don't care about like how expensive something is or how fancy. Like if we were to make something like at home and be like, look, Bobby. A cupcake? Would that mean something to you?

It means nothing to me. What about banana bread? No. What about banana bread? You don't know banana bread. You love banana bread. I know I love banana bread, but it's like that's not, I get banana bread every day. Is it a thought or not?

It's so hard to shop for you because you can get anything you want. I'll give you an example of, I'll give you an example of thoughtfulness. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. And mindfulness. Okay. Okay.

Okay. She got me one last year, right? A framed photo of Tashira Mufoon in his underwear host. Hosting a toast. That's a great one. That's a great one. It's a cool photo. Yeah.

I have a, she framed it. Especially because you love art. She, and it didn't cost her a lot, but it was, I could see. the effort you know what I mean? Yeah. And that's all I want is effort. You know, I ought to do arts and crafts. So much effort.

Jules of all the breads that actually is the least effort. For me, it's a lot of effort. You mash a banana, you throw flour and then you serve it. Yeah, I don't Yeah. It's a lot of effort because I hate doing anything. So there's something.

If some people were, if people call me and go, have you ever tried Jules banana bread? I go, what is it like? It's amazing. That would be, you know what I mean? But it's going to be average shit banana bread banana bread. I'll just be honest.

You're not a banana bread maker. You're not your mom. Your mom's a baker. I guess. Yeah. So I want everyone, you know what I mean, to be that's all. That's the biggest gift that you can give me. Oh, okay.

We got to really. By the time I leave Hawaii. I leave Wednesday. Thursday. I leave Thursday. I leave Thursday. What? What did you say?

me though, right? I didn't hear you. Not including him. He's not part of the gift. You're not a part of it because you give me pokes and I like that. Yeah, what was that? What is that? What kind of poke?

We're poking each other underneath the table. Underneath the table. Oh, yeah. You just flirt. You flirting, yeah. With my wide eyes. What did they call it slap butt? It's not slap butt.

It's not slap butt. You know what I like? Remember in return of the Jedi. You know that little creature next to Jabba? That little kind of you know, he's like a Jabba's pet.

Right? I feel like that guy when I'm near him. Because he's Jabba. Look at his face. If you look at a whole photo of Jabba the hut, there's a tiny little creature next to him

who giggled maniacally. Do you see him or no? They poke each other, that's all. There he is. Zoom in. There I am. You can hardly even see him. I know.

That's it. That's us. The face of Jabba is crazy. Yeah, yeah. You have Jabba's face for sure. I don't know if that's a good thing, but. It's crazy. Do you have grills on?

I know you get. I'm having a blast. You are? Yeah. Okay, good. I'm glad. I thought the show last night was good. Amazing crowd.

That was an amazing crowd. I love it playing here. It's been a great trip. Yeah. A lot of reflection. A lot of things to do. I know that I only live here, like, part-time back and forth and stuff. But staying here this long, this time for a couple months, I kind of don't want to go back home.

You do? I don't want to go back. Oh, you don't. Then don't. No, but it's like everything I need to do is back home. And my family is there. And I really do want to be close to them. But like, I don't want to leave.

We don't want to leave. But we have to. I know. But I'm going to come back in November, I think. Oh, really? Once my special comes out, I might go to Maui. Anyway, what do we, let's wrap up. Let's wrap up.

Happy birthday. Happy birthday to me. Happy birthday, Bobby. 55. I thought 56. I'm 55. Oh, 55, okay. I'll be 55.

And then reflections of my life, well, it's been a journey. A lot of ups and downs, like everyone's lives. But I can kind of see the light at the end of the tunnel here. In a good way or like heaven? Both. Okay, okay. I mean, as you get older, you're in your third half. You're in your last chapter.

I'm in my last chapter 55's last chapter Maybe the third chapter But like there's four chapters Maybe the third chapter You're third I think yeah Late third chapter You're not sunset

Okay Far from sunset I can't wait for sunset though Okay I'm gonna be fucking out of my mind When I become like a little dementia Yeah imagine And you're gonna be taking care of me Jules

I know That's gonna be a lot You wouldn't If I was like bedridden you wouldn't clean my poo and stuff? I will, but I'll still get mad at you. Yeah, I know. Maybe push you a little.

I know. But anyway, it's been great. What a life. And thanks for listening. And thanks for listening to our Hawaiian episodes. They're a little different. They're a lot of different. Yeah.

I miss pronounced so many words today. Cinderella. It was just Sid from Atlanta. Cinderella, Cinderella. Yeah. I get tongue-tied. But anyway, Mahalo, Allah. And good night.

And good evening.