TigerBelly - Bobby’s 999 Club with Chelcie Lynn & Paige Ginn

Episode Date: September 17, 2025

Chelcie and Paige come back to bring the chaos. We chat oatmilk pump, Jamie's pickup lines, a 2.2 billion dollar lawsuit, swingers, smuggling pills, and crab boil obsessions.  BUY NEW MERCH HEREEarn points on rent and around your neighborhood, wherever you call home, by going to joinbilt.com/bellyDraftKings Casino. New players get FIVE HUNDRED SPINS on Huff N’ More Puff over TEN DAYS. Download the app, use code TIGERBELLY, and claim your Spins after your first five-dollar wager. Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial and start selling today at www.shopify.com/tigerbelly   

Oh, yeah, baby. We got shirts in the building. Okay. We get shirts all day long. Yeah. We got shorts, too, in the building. And that's awesome. Hey, Kalila, where can I buy this stuff?

Slapkingdom.com. One more time. Slapkingdom. Third time's a charm! Slepkingdom.com SLEpt kingdom.com Slept Kintekong Dekong

So all that oatmeal you're drinking Well, you should tell Bobby about that new pickup line That actually worked Oh, tell me He's so excited about it So I was at the coffee shop And there was a girl in front of me And she was in my way to get my coffee

And I noticed her hair And I was like, hey, I like your hair Like, it was curdy I like you curly hair And she said, oh, I'm thank you, thank you very much and I was like with confidence I was like you got a name and she's like

yeah I do and then keep going she's like my name is Jenny and I was like oh you got an Instagram now she's like yeah and then she put me on Instagram and like two days later she DMs me

she's like hey I'm going through your Instagram and I don't know you're famous I was like I'm not but okay you're not that's why I told her you're absolutely not yeah

Absolutely not. And that's why I keep tanning her. I mean, some people know you. Some people, yeah, like Jenny. Let me ask you something. Do you think you're famous? I don't think so. Yeah.

Do you think you're getting there? No, I have a long way to go. Okay. I'm nowhere, like... Do you get recognized? Yeah. Where? You know, it's so interesting.

In Dallas, you came to me, you had, did you think you struggled in Dallas or no? At your soul's, yeah, a little bit. Why do you think that is? I was trying new material, and then, you know, as the host, going up first, you know, not everybody knows who you are. So when you set the tone of the show, or you try to set the tone of the show, and it fails, then, you know, then the whole show. You didn't fail?

It was, it's just hosting is a tough job. And a lot of my fan base is not Tiger Valley. It's a lot of its other, like, backgrounds and whatnot. So it's like, some of them probably don't know you. So I felt like, but I thought you did a great job. True? Yeah. I did that stuff you told me to do.

Good. Did you know? Did you know? I had some shows this past weekend in Dallas, and it was like small crowds, but I looked at the people. Like, I locked eyes, and it worked better. Yeah. I still use that, the thermostat. Thermostat, yeah.

Thermostat, yeah. Do you know? So what were Bobby's tips for you? Don't sound scripted. Just go up there and just talk and have fun. And then I did And it was working out better now Yeah

I was like I miss my ex And they just laugh at that And So I was like Yeah I miss my ex guys And I look at I look at a guy

With a girl in the crowd I was like You miss your ex bro He's like Say yeah Don't answer Oh let's go Don't answer that

And I don't know So I'm getting better And was the other tip To lock eyes With the audience Just be funny Okay Lock eyes

Yeah I mean, I was, it was, what's up? Nothing. No, the tip was,

um, he's none of my tips. Yeah. That's what you said. I know, but the tip was, um, a lot of comics,

they, um, memorize these jokes and they're like, I'm going to do these jokes in order, right? But my, um, um,

forget the jokes. Remember to be funny first. Okay? There's a difference between being funny and just telling jokes. Is what I'm saying. So try to get a laugh without even saying anything. That's my, you know, just to kind of be funny, you know. Yeah, just.

And, yeah. Natural. Are they here? No. Okay. But anyway, what is another tip I gave you? Um, I think that's, just don't overthink it. You're, you're still far ahead from, like, coming, like, a natural comic?

I didn't say that. No? I didn't say that. That's not what he said. No, right. Like, I'm still, you know, I'm still in my open mic day, so, you know. So. And I don't beat myself up after every set anymore.

You're not going to remember these sets 10 years from now. No, I don't think of it. Did you know? Did you know they can ride, we find beans? Yeah. Three times? Oh, yeah. Yeah, so we can't have, what, did you know?

Did you know? So, well, the premise was this. We, um, you go up on stage and then you say, you know, a lot of people think I'm like, that I don't know much. I don't know how to pronounce words, but there are things that I do know, right? That I can maybe enlighten you. Yeah. Right.

Right. And then, did you know? Right. Then you go, go ahead. Did you know? Try a couple. Did you know you can refite beans in the infinite times? I don't know.

Yeah, yeah, that's funny, right? I didn't know that. Yeah, yeah. Give me another, did you know? Did you know I can't say the word thermothass? That's good. Keep that. Keep that.

Keep that one. Yeah. And then, I don't want to say this on the camera because I use it now as a joke. Where do I say that? I'll say you later. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So can you come up? Because these are the...

The ones... Yeah, let's try to... The music is great. I feel like you should do it with music. It's so good. Did you know A B stings you It might

I don't know Cure cancer Okay Well we go work on that Yeah Did you know My dad Yeah

Go I don't know Fuck Oh my God He's getting nervous You get nervous Yeah You got too hot

Did you know my dad Was a cheap steak? What's a what A cheese steak? A cheese steak? A cheese steak? A cheap steak. Cheap steak.

Cheap steak. He's the cheap steak. He said, him. Oh, yeah? No. Oh. It's team no. Have you met Andrew?

Yeah. Is he nice to you? Yeah. Can I say what he told me? What? When he saw me in Chicago with Ralph. He's like, what's your little fat friend at? Because I was laying on the, like, the lounge.

Yeah. He says, hey. I was like, yeah? So, Andrew. And he came over. He's like. How's it going? I said, good, good, good.

He's like, he's like, good good. You having fun over there? Sucking on Pumby's ditty. How'd your response? Yeah, he said that and he's like, gosh, man, you're something, man. Because your DM's supposed to be flooded with, like, request and, like, girls. And I told him, you would think so. And he started laughing at me.

Andrew's stories. I love your Ander stories. I love Andrew, man. Have you met Whitney Cummings? No. You haven't met her. You mean the famous people you've met? Comics, yeah.

Yeah. Comics? Famous one. Like the ones from here or just... Just in general. So many followers. Oh, yeah, not guests from here because obviously you've met them, but, like on the wild. At the comedy store, I ran into Shane.

Gillis? Yeah, this past. Do you say hi to him? Shane Wayne. Do you say hi to him? Yeah, that was a stupid joke. I'm sorry. Oh, so Shane Wang or Gillis?

Shane Gillis. Oh. Do you say hi to him or you just, you just did a head nod? You did a what's up? What's up? What's up? All you, sure? Okay.

The comedy store. How was that conversation? So this is all just headnights. I don't want to be like, hey, what's up, dude? Like, my name is Jaime or whatever. What's up, man? Because Shane was by himself. He was just walking up.

And then, um, that's it. What's up? That's it? I think so far. Theo, Theo Vaughn, see him at the comedy story

sometimes. He told Ralph, oh, this is Ralph's story never mind. Ralph met him and then he said,

what branch are you in? Okay. That's it? You're the first guy I met. What? You're the first famous guy I met.

In life? but a Ralph shows you've never met anybody backstage? T.J. Mellor? Oh, he's famous. What a good guy. But before everything started, you were the first one. Oh, really? Yeah. Okay. I'm the nicest one to you. Yeah. Oat milk, man.

And, uh... Of course, you get all the oat milk you want. Give me 15 minutes. Yeah, give you 15 minutes on stage. Can I do you Austin shows? Yeah. I love you. May I please do you? I love you.

I love you. you. One of those coming up, December. Yeah, I love me. Mothership. November 20th. I love you too. I love you too.

No, doing it in a real way, dude. I love you. No. You don't know how to be intimate. Yeah, I do. Hey, dude, as a dude, I love you, man. Dude, man, I love you, man. Do you really do love me, though?

Yeah. Oh, you do? Yeah, man. Okay. I'd like to just hear it every once in a while. I think everybody, I think everybody loves to hear something like, like fun like that like I love you man I love you like a hug yeah

do we hug do we hug yeah you hug me at the Addison Improv I do you hug me right before coming on stage yeah yeah I love you you know why I hug you why

I love you I love you too man this is uh Robert De Niro I love you yeah I love you man yeah yeah

I love you okay good very good Christopher Wachin Yeah. Try it. You got it. Let me see, Christopher.

Forget it, dude. The remote controls you. It's the word. You do an impression of which one to guess what it is. Are they here? I'm going to get them. Hello, everybody. Yeah, you guys are here at the old one.

You hear at the old one, right? Yeah. Do we just sit down where? You guys sit right there? And then Chelsea. I'll be a podcast room like this. Me too. You don't have one like this?

You guys have a ranch. You have a good one. It's good. Yeah, yeah. You have a real good one. Yeah, it's not like this. Our ceiling isn't even a ceiling. Yeah, we don't have a ceiling.

Oh, you don't have a ceiling? No. It's outside? It's outside. Okay, what camera is me? Too soon? Oh, good. Is this guy new?

You don't know him? No. You don't know Hy-Hibbe? Oh, I know the name. Oh, okay, yes. No, you don't. No, I do. Don't. Don't act like you do. You don't.

No, I've seen him on here. Yeah, Jaime. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's like, I've heard of my name. You don't know. No. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's been on here for a minute. Yeah, he's been on here for a minute. Yeah, he's Hispanic. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You've met, run into those before, right? I met a couple. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And you love.

Love. Yeah, me too. I wouldn't say, well, no. Oh, man, this is awesome. I love. Stop it. Like we're at a funeral. I'm not a fucking late. Don't say that. Oh, that's not worse fear. Don't say it twice.

We're now we're fucking late. Say that. See? We're on tiger belly and we're fucking late. I was late. We're going to have a debate. Oh, wow. Wow.

On why you shouldn't be late. Yeah, you're fucking late. Yeah. Welcome. Paige Jen, Chelsea Lynn. A.k.a. Trailer trash. Sure.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. You can call me anything. Yeah. You don't go by that anymore? Well, people will call me trailer trash, Tammy. Yeah, yeah. But you could mostly go now go for Chelsea.

That's on my birth certificate. Yeah. That's on your birth certificate. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Did you know that? Yes. Yeah. Are you still married? Oh, yeah. Yeah, I like him a lot. He wanted to come today, and he was trying to finagle his way onto the podcast.

Yeah, we were actually going to bring you a gift, but he didn't. What happened? What happened? Well, here's what happened. Yeah. We wanted to sneak in a bag of crab boil. Oh, what? Crabboil. First of all, what are you so obsessed with fucking crab? You're obsessed with crabboil.

Why are you so obsessed with crabboil? You're obsessed with it. I've never been there. You told us last time. Oh, okay. And we've been trying to go. But you're more obsessed than I am. No.

Yeah, yeah. That's all you talk about is crab boil. Because we just want to eat a crab boil with you. I just want to break sticks with you. Okay. Or crab legged. Grab leg. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And we've been trying to do that forever. And you're always, I'm busy. I'm doing here. Oh, I have a flight. I'm a really sure. I better hop on a street. Well, I mean, I got. I go to the boiling crab in Hawaii.

Okay. No, there's one here. I know there's several here. Okay. So I thought, okay, if you're not going to go with us to a boiling crab, we're going to bring it to you. Yeah. And we wanted to sneak it maybe 10 minutes in, pull it out. Yeah.

But we didn't want you to think that the smell was us. Ah, there is a smell. Yeah. Do you get the whole shebang or do you get in some of the seasoning? I get mild still with the seasoning. All of it, though. Yeah. Extra garlic.

Yeah. There's Cajun in it, butter. The whole thing. Mild. You get mild. You can't do medium. No. Well, I could.

Yeah, yeah. But the crab legs are so good. I don't want to take away from that flavor. Oh, sure. You know what I mean? You're eating a delicacy. Yeah. You know?

Yeah. And I add eggs. You add hard boiled egg. Yeah. Well, I'll tell you what I add. Okay. Do you mind? I would love.

Step by step. Yeah. I always get probably six potatoes. Ooh. I'll leave those out. I get six potatoes, too. Yeah, yeah, yeah, good. You.

Oh, China. China. Hey, you China. Oh, China. And we get the, I get sliced sausages in there. Okay. I always get a side of white rice for some reason. Yeah, and then what else do I do?

Corn. I got to do about four or five corn in there. Wow. Do you ever tell them to leave the sausage hole? No. You do the hole? No. Okay.

You said slice, so I didn't know if you had it. Ask. No, but they always come Slice. Yeah. I've never said whole. They pre-slice for you. Yeah.

What? They pre-slice for you. They pre-slice, yeah, yeah. So we wanted to do that, and Greg was like, oh, well, y'all can start the podcast, and then I can walk in and bring you the crab boil 10 minutes. I go, you're not coming on the podcast. We wanted to B-Y-O-B. Well, now that I know you don't care, I could have brought them.

Yeah. Do you tattoo those? Those are tattooed? Yes, because if I don't, they're blonde, and they don't exist. Oh. Oh, so, China. China. Every time I think of a boil, I think of a pussy boil.

Stop. Well, stop. What did you mean to boil? You don't know what pussy boy's on? Can you tell me about a pussy boil? She had once. Yeah, yeah. So you had a boil in your pussy?

Not in it. I call her Susan Boyle. I've had a couple. Yeah. I've had a couple. Is it like a bunion? No. Not that rough.

It's not that rough. Yeah, yeah. But it's almost like a pimple, but it's, it's huge, and when it pops, bro, I'm not even going to... It locks and drops. Wait, wait, wait, wait. I'm not a doctor, but... So, this is the vaginal region, for instance, right? Point to where the boil would be.

Okay, so this is inside the hole. Don't go in there. That's not in there. So this is just the outside. It could be like right there. Oh, like on the outside. Like the lip. Oh, well, it's like...

It's Gaza. Yeah. Some can come inside, though. Sorry. I've never had one in there. Well, you're never inside. No, no. And how do you pop it?

Can I just, can I admit to people? Because this is something I don't admit to. If you're paying rent, if you're paying rent every month without earning anything in return, let me introduce you to Build, the awards program designed for renters who want to earn something. for their largest monthly expense. Let me explain. Nobody wants to pay rent. Nobody, nobody. But if you have to,

Bilt makes it worth it. Built is revolutionizing how millions think about paying rent by rewarding their members with points and exclusive benefits around their neighborhood every single month. By paying rent through Bilt,

you earn flexible points that can be redeemed towards hundreds of hotels and airlines of future rent payment, your next lift ride, and more. But it doesn't stop there. Built is about making your entire neighborhood more rewarding.

You can dine. sign out that your favorite local restaurants and earn additional points get VIP treatment at certain fitness studios, enjoy exclusive experiences just for Build members every month. Built is turning a monthly expense into an opportunity to earn rewards, discover the best that your neighborhood has to offer. Your rent is finally working for you. Earn points on rent around your neighborhood. Wherever you call home by going to jointbilt.com slash belly, that's J-O-I-N-B-B-I-L-T-com slash Belly. Make sure you use our URL so they know we sent you. Built. Draft King's Casino

Woo! Draft King's Casino Yeah! Drive King's Casino has your playbook for getting action all season long. Play thousands of popular slots for a shot at jackpots. Over 400 million has already been awarded. New players get 500 spins on Huff and More Puff over 10 days.

Download the app, use code Tiger Belly, and claim your spins after your first $5 wager. Get in the game with Draft King's Casino. Home of the largest jackpot win in online casino history. The crown is yours. Gambling problem call 1-800-Gambler. In Connecticut, help is available for problem gambling. Call 888-78-9-77 or visit ccpg.org.

Please play responsibly 21-plus physically present in Connecticut, Michigan, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, West Virginia only, void in Ontario. Eligibility restrictions apply. New customers-only, non-withdrawable casino spins issued at 50 spins per day for 10 days, valid for featured game only, and expire each day after 24 hours. See terms at Casino. dot com slash probos ends October 5th, 2025 at 11.59 p.m. Eastern Time. Poppet.

Can I admit to people? Because this is something I don't admit to, is I get boils on my head. Ooh, so just my dad. Not on my penis head. Do you have a greasy head? Yeah, I have a greasy head. That's why.

Yeah. Yeah. So I get boils on my head once every five years. Okay. Yeah, and so I have a process of how to get to pop it. Okay, what's that process? What's your process first? So I just let it kind of marinate.

With what, sweat and tears? Just, yeah. She was like, oh, my birthday hurts so bad. Well, because when you walk, you know, and it's like, you know. So I just let it go until I know it's ready, and you can feel it in your soul. I know, but there's a way to force it out. It's like, I just do this. It's like my version of like, open up.

Yeah. Right? And they're like, we ain't come going out there. Right? Open up. Let's in a swat. Yeah, man. Yeah, but, and then I have a way of forcing them out.

Yeah. Right. So, you know how you do it? Hot cold, baby. Mm. Hot cold. Okay. So what you do is you take a bag of fucking ice.

Just listen to me. Oh, we're here. Yeah, yeah. This is too much. And not your kind of ice. Hi, man, but, um. Shamed ice. Pevelled ice

No, no, no, you know the Mexicans and the ice agents Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, that joke Yeah, that joke Keep it in, keep it in, keep it in, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, keep it in it in, yeah, yeah, keep it in it, but, um, this is what you do, a bag, excuse me? You say keep in any of one, no, like us. A little different, so, so not a handful of ice, a bag. Damn, what, just have a bag. Just have a bag.

Ten gallon bag? Not a ten bag, but, you know, have some ice, is what I'm saying, you can have a bowl of it. Okay. All right, and then you freeze it. Freeze the ice. No, you, no. I'm like, that's kind of dog. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, you freeze the boil.

You take an ice cube, you lay it against the boil, and you get it so it's so cold, okay? Okay. And then what you do, you're in a bathtub doing this, by the way. Okay. And then you take hot water, and then you heat it. Okay. And you go back and forth about a hundred times. Why?

It draws the pus out. Oh. It draws the pus out. Okay. Yeah, and that's what I do. So how do you get the hot water? Well, you know, I have a bathtub, and it has a thing where you can heat adjustment. So when you get the ice cube on there?

What? When you get the ice cube on there, you just hold it, and then you just do a dunk under the water. Yeah, then I dunk my head in the water. Then I put a nice ice cube, dunk, and then back and forth. A hundred times. That's efficient. It's efficient, yeah, yeah. Do that with your pussy boil.

I can. I would, but it just, mine is just ready when it's ready, and then I do this, and it just. Yeah, but it's not. but there's a, there's a, okay, let me just say something. So you're, you're speeding up the process. I don't want to wait a month. Yeah, I'm letting it happen. Oh, you wanted to let it happen.

He's your friend. You were just hanging out. All right, you name him. If I get bored. You name him? I'll talk to him. Yeah, what do you name them? Yeah, I don't know.

Yeah, Susan. Do you know Susan Boyle? Yeah, the singer that from, I dream to dream and talk about. 30 billion views. Didn't know you were music. musical. What do you mean? I'm not. That was impressive. We don't know you can move your fingers like that. Yeah, yeah. I can't. No clue. Well, I could play basic piano. You know what I mean?

Wow. They many song. Okay. No, no. May many song. Mary had a little land. No, no, I don't know to do that. But my point is this, stop doing this. But, um, yeah, I mean, I know a little. I'm Asian. Wow. We all know a little. Okay. Yeah, yeah. Impressive. How about you, Paige? I mean, you're half, right? Yes. Half Chinese? Yeah, I know some things. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, she does. I forgot your dad or your mom's Chinese? Dad. Dad's Chinese.

Yeah. Yeah. So. Is he full blown? Full blown. Yeah, yeah. He's full-blown Chinese, dude. Not blowing.

Yeah, yeah. No. Do you have a good relationship with him? Oh, we talk every day. You do? Yes, we smoke weed together. He's almost 80. Oh, my God.

Does he have an accent? No. No. Yeah, he does. Yeah, he does? Yeah. He does. Yeah.

Give me an impression of her. Do an impression of her dad. Oh, God. He has like a 10% accent. So he'll be like, Like 100 being like, you know, a strong accent. He's got like, you know, he'll just be like, he'll even tell me like, oh, I love my daughter. That's not the other.

I feel like you're not committing. Yeah, there's no. Because he's, it's a little. Oh, so it sounds American then? Yeah, with a slight. Wow, I'm not my daughter. It's too much. Oh, too much?

Yeah, yeah. Oh, I love my daughter. It's not enough. Oh, I see. What? Yeah. Well, budgedo. I don't know what I have.

It means I don't know. I don't know. Yeah. What part of a China is he from? They're Cantonese Oh, they're Cantonese Yeah, and your mom's white Yeah, white

So when you, do you identify as Asian? Yeah, a half, but I say, I think I said this last time But I say I'm a cock Asian You know That's funny Yeah, that's funny That's real fun

Yeah That's real fun thing So there's that Yeah, yeah Do you speak a little Chinese? I've been trying to learn Mandarin Oh my gosh It's so hard

Yeah But you know some She'll be popping stuff out. I'm like, whoa. I've been trying to learn, but damn. Yeah. Do you, we already were talking about your farts already, right? Okay, no, we haven't talked about them this time, I don't think. I know, but last

time we talked about your farts? I think we should talk about them again. We can speak, yeah. Do you have new questions? I do. Any questions? Why? Can you fart on command page? I can I can brew it up, and then when I need to release it, I can do that. So, yeah. But, like, right now I don't. Right now.

Is that like coffee brewing or? I'll drink Starbucks, tomatoes, do it. Cabbage. And cabbage. Cabbage will smell bad, though. Oh, they will? Oh, stinky. But you can do it in, it takes about an hour to brew or?

Do you need me to start brewing? No, I don't want you to brew and, no. We don't know. We don't need buries. Well, we can maybe end the pod with a fart. So I'll just start something. Okay. And you'll fart into the mic?

Yeah, I will. Let me start the pot. Okay, yeah, all right. How do you feel about that? It's pretty hot. Really? You're a fart guy? So you like farts in a sexual way? A lot of people do.

But like if she can brew a fart of, that's pretty hot. Okay, it's a hot fart, but like, pretty cool, man. Would you ever, like, not to him? Wait, rewind it a little bit. Watch timing. There we go. Wow.

Like his eyes. His eyes got. Wow. One time we got a comment on that video and it said everyone in this video deserves to be in hell. Really? And we laughed. We thought that was funny.

That's not against the Lord's rules No, I know The Lord loves it Why do you think we have buttholes Besides the poop Yeah There's other really things Smuggling for me

Yeah Opium Across the border Yeah yeah There's a few things Yeah yeah Balloons Like I would be the balloon guy

In prison Oh a little balloon not Like I would visit you Yeah I feel like you'd be in prison Before me or no Well I'm wearing a cutoff shirt You're halfway there

You know I'm wearing the uniform Yeah I think I would visit you in prison And I would smuggle things my butthole for you. What would you want me to I'm trying to think of what I would want. Dintai Fong. Bring me a dumpling. I can probably do one pot sticker.

Bring me a shallow. One pod sticker, one cucumber. Spicy cucumber? Bobby, I'm going to need you to start stretching. I'm going to eat a whole meal. All right. Okay. I'm going to need Coral. All right. Aside from Dingtai Fong, that's a lot. But the dumplings would come out so easy.

I would have to put them in a balloon, though. That's smart. Keep it all together. Yeah, yeah. You got to keep everything together. You want a seafood boil? Yeah, yeah. Crabb boil? A corn. Cod might be hard.

Yeah, if we're doing no food, I'm going to do, I think just honestly, like, probably quarters so I can get some food at the commissary. But also, that's not something. Six bucks, I can do six bucks. You can do six bucks in your hole? Yeah, in my hall. Yeah, yeah, yeah, of quarters, yeah. That's also something you don't have to smuggle.

You can just give that to me. Oh, right, right. I think it's fun for fun. For fun. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I want to hand you the balloon. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Imagine you pulling it out slowly Yeah, but I'd have to do it secretly Yeah And they're good to see you She'd probably want her phone Yeah But you smuggle a phone Well they allow phones now in prison

Oh yeah they do already People in prison are making TikToks What would you page? What should I smuggle for you? Hmm Maybe like a vape pen or Oh Very good Maybe one

Yeah some indica and I know the storage of my bunhole So like you know what I mean You know the capacity The capacity yes Could you ever? Could you ever fit a shot glass in your butt, for real? If need be, yes.

Yeah, I think you could. Yeah. Oh, you take bigger turds than a shot glass. Yeah. That's easy. Yeah. And you can smoke probably a lot, not that. Why do you say that?

Because the boil. You could probably put something in the boil. If the boil's big enough, that's an extra hole we can smoke. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's what I'm saying. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's true. Yeah, that's very true. That's an extra hole.

Have you ever smuggled anything in your ass or? I smuggled, so when I, back in the day when I was doing drugs, I used to smuggled pills. I used to smuggled pills from Mexico across the border. And you'd put them in a balloon? No, I wouldn't put them in a balloon. What I'd do was I would take all the, I would take a bottle of, like, gigantic ball of tile and all. Okay? And then you have to take all the, back then there was like metal wrapping.

I didn't think the metal wrapping. Did you just sound like a baby rattle when you would walk? Here's the key, cotton balls. Ah. Smart. So it's stuff it would put up, so there was no rattling. And I would scotch tape it to my leg. Oh, you didn't put it in your butthole.

No, no, no. I'm thinking you put it in your butt hole. I'm like, what the hell? What, George, you have a... Why the Tylenol bottle? I thought that was like the tricky thing that I'd think it was Tylenol, but if you're having it in your pants,

I think they're pretty sure that it's something. I'm too afraid that they're going to open it. Yeah. Why is he bringing Tylenolol? They sell it in America. In my mind, that's not like they were thinking. Damn, but you get headaches even if you cross the border and stuff. Yeah, that is true.

Did you ever get caught? You have a scary moment where maybe they looked at your leg and were you trying to pass it off as your wiener? Was it in your inner thigh and you were trying to pass it off? Or where was it? Sometimes I would strap it to my thigh and sometimes, yeah, I think a couple times I did it in my wiener. So they're looking at it and saying, oh, he's just hard. Well, they don't say pull your pants down. Right.

I wear baggy pants. Smart. Yeah, yeah. But I'll be sweating. Oh, that could have been a dead giveaway. Yeah, yeah. So when they were doing this. Yeah.

What were you, what were you like, I'm done? No, I would like, I would just be like this. Bulk up? No, I would like bring my, um, stick my butt out. Yeah. Right? Yeah, put your upper body over your. Like I had spinal biffitt or something.

You know what? The great thing, the great thing about being fat is, and this is probably the only thing, is I could hide anything almost anywhere at any time under my tit. Damn. Whoa. Her tits have a different temperature. Under my... Hemisphere. There's different...

It's like a hemisphere or something. Probably 20 degrees hotter. Wow. You should feel. Really? Under there. Just go under. Really? Stick my finger underneath your grass? Just hand to hand. Just under. Hurry.

It's getting cold. Get the real heat. Oh my God. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's hot in there. Hey, you have to be careful, tying things to your legs. What? Yeah. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on.

You said sorry, but not you. Oh, I have nothing to give. Just put a hand up against their end, go. Oh, yeah, it's hot. Yeah, it's hot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Interesting. Yeah.

But, you know, I could, I mean, that's easy. I feel like you lost weight. Oh, I'm the fattest I've ever been in my line. Oh, okay, my bad. I, uh, I, uh, I, uh, I, uh, I, I, uh, I feel like, I'm crazy conference. I don't know why I just said that. I didn't get 30 pounds.

I really didn't. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But thank you. You really can't see. Yeah. Um, are you, um, are you, you're just eating a lot more? What's going on? Yeah, I think, I think honestly, like, touring got me.

Yeah. There's nothing to eat when you're in the Midwest, you know, it's late at night. It is. What are you going to eat? Pars, Jr. I know, that's what I'm saying. That's really, or gas stations. Yeah, when I started touring is when I started gaining weight.

And now I'm like, okay, you've been, yeah. So, yeah, I've gained a lot of weight since touring. But, Paige, you don't gain weight. Ever. I take 14-inch shits. Oh, 14-inch. Are they thin? No, they're thick.

Oh, you're thick, yeah. And they're intact. And with a great dog taper. What, we're intact. This is an interesting. People have those brisket shits and they're all floating all over the toilet. Mine are a solid rope. A rope, right.

You know what I do is I have a mechanism in my anal cavity where I clinch it. Ooh. Yeah, yeah. You don't clinch your butt hole. You clinch up. No, what I'm saying is, is the poo's coming out and I go, that's too long. So I'll just clinch it and then I'll start a new one. Okay.

Yeah, you make the Lincoln Log House. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There was a study done at University of Michigan. A girl did a 26-foot poop. Damn. It's the night to have, Paige. I got to beat her. Yeah, you got to beat her, dude.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I think you could, Paige. Yeah. This bitch eats more than me. Wow. And I'm not kidding. You have a good metabolism. Yeah, all, yeah.

The best one in the world. I told her, I go, bro, if you had my metabolism, this bitch would pay 500 pounds. I always want to gain about 400 pounds because I always have to sit in the back. of the car. Yeah. And so I always tell her, hey, I'm going to gain some weight so I don't have to sit back here anymore. Oh, you're always in the middle.

They're always like, Paige, get in the back. Right. Because she's the littlest one. I'm not climbing back there. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's true. That's true. That's true.

You know, so there's perks to being bigger. Yeah. What about coach? Do you coach on flights? I do. Yeah, yeah. Is that hard or? No, no, no, no.

Okay. Not at all. I'm not that fat yet. You would think that you're at first class now. It depends, Bobby. I mean, let me, let me, let me tell you, you're kind of here yet, no, I think. Well, if it's, like, ridiculously, I'm like, I'm not doing it. If I can get a coach for like $250, but then the first class is $2,000, I'm not doing that.

You're not. Hell no. Oh. I'm like, hell. But if it's like better, a little bit better price. Me either. I was like, I would ever do that. Me either.

Uh-uh. And she can sleep anywhere. Yeah. Oh, you can sleep anywhere. She could fall asleep right here. Do you fall asleep standing up? I have a friend named Jensen that used to do that. No.

If I'm sitting up, I'm walking. I knew a good dude that could just go to a corner of the room, just stand in the corner and fall deeply asleep. Oh, yeah. I can do it sitting down, though. You can sit down. Oh, I can literally go sleep right now. Standing up, how would he not fall down?

I don't know. He was just, it was an incredible talent. Wow. Yeah, but I'm. That sounds like you're just yet. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you think so. A little bit. Yeah, I think maybe I lied.

A little bit. Well, show proof. Yeah. We want to see a video. Well, no. I can stand up sleeping. You do? Yeah.

How do you know you're asleep? Because I'm falling asleep. Boom, got you. Boom, Jaime. Damn, he got me. Yeah, you got you. I got a quick one here, dude. I was working at a warehouse.

And my instructor was Chinese. And he got mad at me because I was like, because he was telling me how to put the engine in one piece. Yeah. I was like, this is boring. sleeping on the job yeah and what did he say to you wake up wake up wake up yeah yeah oh sorry sir

what was his name huh what was his name wong Wong okay that sounds that means that sounds made up you just thought of a Chinese name I have proof I have witness okay who Ralph Ralph Ralph Barbrosa yeah yeah yeah yeah okay hey so

you eat a lot yeah rippity question like what are you a feeder are you a feeder No, I don't eat a lot, but are you hungry or you just? Sure, what do you have? No, no, no, I'm saying like, when you eat in a lot, are you hungry or you just stress eating? Because this is not fair.

Just I'll be sitting there and I'm like, dang, in and out sounds good. She eats for fun. And so I go. She's always hungry and she eats for fun. Oh. We'll go eat and then. Wait, wait, wait, wait, you live in Nashville? Yeah. All right.

In the city or outside? Outside. How long does it take you to get to Nashville from Florida? 15 minutes. Okay, so you live in Nashville. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

And you guys live together? No. Okay. But we live close. We live close to each time. We live 20 minutes apart. Yeah, 20 minutes apart. But she'll, I mean, we'll go eat.

And then 30 minutes later, she'll go, let's go get something to eat. A lot. And I'm like, well, even me, I'm like, we just ate. But she's like, no, let's go. I'm like, oh my God. You know what? Being friends with her, I think that's what's really got me ballooned up, I think. I do need to do better because I'll be like, let's go, let's go here.

Let's go to Sonic and get a cherry lime made, add sweet cream. Let's go here. And then, you know. Yeah. So not everyone has the same metabolism. Oh, I see. But who pays? We both pay.

We just pay for ourselves, or we usually split. Or you guys split. Or I'll pay and then she'll get next time. We don't, or if like she pays, I don't, like, we don't Venmo. You know, we're just like, whatever. Here's my pet peeve. If I'm in line at Starbucks and I see two people together, you know this, and they order separately and they pay separately, it drives me crazy.

I understand a party more than two, right? But two people, I'm just like... Just pay for the guy's coffee. Yeah, and they just do something, like an arrangement like that. Yeah. It just saves time. Yeah. Or if you're out to eat with a group and you're like, split this up, like, that can...

No, we don't get annoying. We don't do that. If I'm at dinner. What happens? There's six people, what do you do? I'll just pay for everybody. Yeah, we'll just pay. And I will not.

And they'll be like, oh, VINMO. I'm like, no. I VINMO her, though. She will. But I'm like, no, I got dinner. I just, I hate at. Can we split it all? I'm not asking.

I can't. I can't. I can't. I got the bill. Yeah, yeah. Wow, wow. Or she'll get whatever. Yeah.

I'm not having them split it. Yeah. That's a pet peeve of mine too. Thank you. We have the same pet peeve. Yep. Yeah. Yeah.

What's another pet peeve of yours? Oh, I have so many. Name a couple. Let's hear them. I got one. When you're at the air pole? Yeah. TSA?

No, not Tia. Obviously, when you're, or I guess when you're anywhere and the stall opens, like, on the inside and you, like, can't even. Well, I guess you guys use urinals a lot, huh? You're not really in the stalls. Yeah. Here's another peppy airport, okay, is when you're going to security checkpoint, get ready. Be ready. You know, have your ID out.

You know what to do. Electrical stuff should be out of your bag already. Oh, no. My husband will wait until we are there, and the guy's, like, license, and then. And then he'll start digging out his license out. I have my license out. Bobby, I have my license out when I'm outside of the airport in my hand. Yeah, me too.

Bo, bro. And the whole time I'm like, get your license out. Greg, get your license out. Yeah. I will get your license out now. I will. Yeah, I have another one. Go ahead.

I have another one there. Oh, I bet you have a couple. Let's hear. Yeah, yeah. Here's another one, okay. Is, you know, if you're not group number one and you're group number four, what are you standing in the fucking area for?

Yeah. What about when you're at baggage claim and they're all. Oh. Oh. I don't even know what you're saying, but oh. Oh. Oh. No, stand back.

So when you see your bag, you can walk up and get it. Don't stand right next to the barrel and then the person whose bags there, they can't go rip it off because you're standing there. Yeah. What about people on the cell phones like on their airplanes? Talking loud or what? Talking loud. That's not really a thing Oh, okay

Yeah People don't do that I do that I've never seen that And you really don't have cell phone service Too much up in the plane Yeah Okay, what if you're like

Get it off the plane You're in a hurry To get a baggage claim You have somewhere to be You're having an audition And the guy in front of you Just slow walking and like No

That's not a good No I've never had that happen I mean one more time Come connect connect Come on Come on Okay

I pet peeve at that airport Let's go TSA no Yeah Don't you have TSA pre-check Yeah Yeah yeah I do What are you talking about?

Yeah Yeah Oh from spirit Yeah Go ahead Yeah Just say that When your flight gets delayed

Yeah Yeah Yeah That sucks Yeah That's a pet Yeah Yeah but that's something

That's a pet pee on Oh my God That's a pet When they know How your favorite Chicken sandwich There we go Yeah

Yeah Yeah that Yeah That's a pet food Yeah Okay Another thing is It's the same thing at like

You know Okay coffee shops Yeah That's what I'm saying The guy in front of you He's on the phone And he's like Why

Let go on the phone thing He likes the phone Get off the phone Let go to the phone thing Okay I do hate when people talk On speaker Okay

That's annoying Never seen that But not at the airport But like in grocery stores When Paul Movie theaters Okay

Give me a pep There when somebody is watching the movie with you and then they're on the phone throughout the movie I rarely see that I never see that either but if it did happen if it did happen it would bother me yes if it did happen but I've never been

with anybody that's been on their phone I hate when you can hear people eating popcorn and snacks next to you I can't even concentrate oh that's a pretty good one yeah yeah that's a good one get off the cell phones I'm basically yeah I know that's what you're trying to say yeah okay so you would rather have lived in like

early 1900 I don't think so I won't make it. You would make it in the early? Why not? Why not? Because I need my cell phone. No, no.

Honestly. What would Jaime do in the early 1900s in America? Make ice? No, you would make ice? An ice maker. Yeah, yeah, yeah, maybe that.

Hopefully it's pebbled. Yeah. Do you guys like pebbled ice? What's it? From Sonic? What is it? Yeah. Oh, the little tiny ball.

We like the ball. I don't like the ball. What? You like the thick cubes? Yeah, yeah, I prefer thick cubes and balls. You never thought about this before, have you? We're ice connoisseurs.

Oh, yeah. Well, it will teach me then because I want to be... Well, you just said you hated pebble ice. I've never had it before. Crushed. It just makes the drink better. Okay. Oh, these are the different forms.

Okay. I'll take a flake. I'll take a nugget. A nugget. A little nugget. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, have you guys been to Mexico?

Yeah. We have that. What? I heard you're not supposed to drink the ice in Mexico. It'll give you the shits. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I got a gut of steel.

I'll do anything. You don't get diarrhea? Well, that's the thing. I have it every day. So if I go to Mexico, it's going to be no different. So I might as well just have fun. Yeah. How about you?

You get D or no? No, I don't really get D. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. You know, being on Wegovi, I'm on Wegovi. I don't get D's anymore. Wow. I can't poo, actually.

I have to take a supplement. What's Wegoia? Like, Trip Advisory? Ozympic. Oh, okay. An ozimic thing. Okay, okay. So now you have to take a pill.

for that and then a build a shit. Okay, okay. It's an injection. And then I feel the shit. Yeah. Is it worth it? Well, I mean, Andrew Santino texted me this weekend and goes, 10 people are blind now because of Ozimic.

You've got to get off it. Yeah, I've been seeing stuff pop up. Blindness? Not just other bodily problems. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So have you lost vision at all? No, I feel, see, but also I think my, Chelsea Handler's my, like, you know what I mean? If she goes blind, then I'll stop.

Yeah. Because she takes a lot of it. She's your mentor. She's just somebody I'm like, here's my movie mentor. Here's my, we go, like, Ozimic, you know what I mean? Someone that I look at and go, oh, she seems fine. Yeah. Okay.

I'd rather be fat than go blind and shit your pants all the day. Then be an experiment and have something happen. And I'd be like, oh, she could have just been fat. And I saw that you were puking. Yeah, that was, I took too much in the beginning. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, but it's, I lost like 25 pounds almost.

Yeah, yeah. You look great. You didn't say anything when I first greeted you at the door. I said, you look great. She did say that. Oh, you did. Oh, thank you. She did and you ignored it

Yeah Paige you have a boyfriend Nope Why not? Wow Men Because I don't have one

Because you know I just don't And I had a squatter though My ex-boyfriend was squatting in my house For the past four months And I wasn't living in my house I was just with the suitcase Yeah traveling around

And I just barely got back into my house And is he still there? No But if he was there your ex, would you one night maybe hook up with her? Hell no. He's suing me in Chelsea right now for $1.2 billion. Literally.

Billion? Yep, with a B. It's actually $2.2 billion. For what? Bro. This is a whole thing. Can we talk about it? I mean, a little bit, yeah, yeah. He just said, you know,

that he came up with all of, he said he came up with our podcast, produced it, came up with all of our jingles, that he came up with our tours. and everything. He did nothing. Yeah, he did nothing.

He's his own lawyer. Literally, he had chat, GBT, right up the lawsuit. And my lawyers are like, bro, this is like the most ridiculous thing. It's going to be dropped. Also billion? Yeah.

Well, he also listed Apple, Spotify, Draft Kings, and a couple other people in the lawsuit. And he's just, well, here's the thing. He would rather try to sue people and get money than work. That's what it is. He's one of those.

He's one of those. Question. So, yeah. What is he? White? Yeah, white. Yeah, it's a white guy. Shopify.

Shopify. Shopify. Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of businesses around the world. And 10% of all e-commerce in the U.S. old names like Mattel and Jim Sharp to brands just getting started, buddy. Like Tiger Belly. Just like Tiger Belly, we use Shopify, and without it, we would be not good. Not good.

You'd be drowning in the water. You can get started with your own design studio. With hundreds of ready-to-use templates, Shopify helps you build a beautiful online store to match your brand style. Accelerate your content creation. Shopify is packed with helpful AI tools that write product descriptions, page headlines, and even enhance your product photography. Get the word out like you have a marketing team behind you.

Easily create email and social media campaign wherever your customers are scrolling or strolling. And guess what? I don't know. Best yet, Bobby. Shopify is your commerce expert with world class expertise and everything from managing inventory to international shipping to processing returns and beyond. If you're ready to sell, you're ready for Shopify. Turn your big business idea into with Shopify on your side. Sign up for your $1 per month trial and starts slang today at Shopify.com slash Tiger Belly.

Go to Shopify.com slash Tiger Belly. Shopify.com slash Tiger Belly. And it's a white guy. And a trust fund, baby. You got to go Asian. Okay. Have you ever gone Asian? I haven't.

Why? Hmm. You don't find us attractive? No, I find Asians attractive. I just never have had any. in my area. In my area. In the natural area,

there's not a single Asian you see. Well, she hasn't looked. You haven't looked since. You haven't looked at, yeah. You know what we look like, right?

She's been like, I'm not looking at it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know what you look like, but I haven't really been looking for anything. Oh, I see. I've just been scrolling on my phone.

And I mean, I'm not opposed to Asians, though. Yeah, you're not opposed to. You were totally fucking Asian. Oh, yeah. Come on. What about

Mexicans? Yeah, I mean Mexican. All races. Okay. Yeah, all of us. You think all races.

Yeah, all races. All about. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're white. You like white. Oh, you're married. I'm married to a white guy. We're together 20 years.

Yeah. Oh, so before that you probably didn't like experiment with different. Oh, no. Oh, no. And I'm ready for that stage in my life. To go wild? And I love them to death.

Yeah. And I still want to be with him. But I keep saying, Baby, I want to go to one of those sex clubs where everybody's fucking. Like a swinger party. Like a swinger party, but they're called something. When you go in and there's like 500 people and they're all just fucking. You want to train on you.

Well, no, but what are they called? Okay, if we were, okay, let's say there's a set club, right? And it's, let's pick a city. It's in Indianapolis. Oh, yeah. You guys fly there, right? And then you see, you see me there. I'm working with those eyes wide shut masks.

But you can tell it to me. Yeah. I'm bad Yeah, because I'm sorry Jesse And there's a beanie There's a beanie on top Beanie on

Are you pretend to be someone else Are you trying to trick us? Yeah, no, I'm Casamiro That's my name Okay But you know it's me Yeah Right

And we're all naked Yeah Right You know it's me But We're gonna pretend like it's not And we're gonna fuck you Really?

Yeah You would Would you let me suck on your boil Oh Oh If it would cure it Hold on Hold on

Yeah Would you want to I would probably kiss it but not suck on it I would go like that Okay, I'll let you do that Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Yeah, I would let you do that But you would really literally let me like

Have sex with you at a sex? Well, I'm at a sex party Yeah, but you know it's me or friends You guys are friends Yeah, yeah, yeah See, now if it was like Just me and you in a bedroom or something I'd leave.

You would leave. That'd be weird That'd be weird, yeah At a sex club though In a sex club Yeah, yeah There's people around and we're all having fun Yeah, yeah

I'd be like, hey, why not? Yeah. I think that'd be fun. I think I would stick the tip in. Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think if you stuck the tip in, just the tip in. It would be so funny.

We'd be laughing so hard, dude. Bro. We'd be laughing. We'd be crying. So hard. Crying. Would you do missionary, doggy? What are you working with?

We'd have to be missionary so we'd watch each other laugh. Yeah. Dude, we would be, we would probably die from laughing. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. Bobby. And I would go, you know what?

I would get soft inside your badge, I think. And that's fine. Yeah, yeah. That would be funny. And then when I try to pull it out, it's like gum in it because it gets stuck. Well, that's called soaking. That's what the Mormons do. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

So how about you? Would you be too fine? Yeah. Would I be okay? No, it would be fine. Okay. Yeah. All right.

Uh-huh. He's like, when are you guys going? I don't think I could do it, to be honest with you. You can go to the street? I love you guys too much as friends as though. I think that's, yeah. No, we would. No, we would have.

No, no, yeah. But it would be funny. But for sure. So funny. We would do it for the bit. Yes. For the bit, I'd do anything for a bit. Yes.

Yeah, you're right. Now, would you actually go to a sex club? Have you been? Mm-mm. I thought you did. You were all white. Well, yeah, but that one, I didn't participate. I just, I was an observer.

Okay. Yeah, yeah. But, you know, I've never been to like an active sex party where, you know what I was participating. Gotcha. Yeah, yeah. I didn't even know how to. How to start it?

So what were you, a cuck? Yeah. I just ran into a group of people that were having a sex party. I just went. You just walked in? I walked in. They were all Asian, and it was like, they were all dressed in white.

He had a corn and dog. And I went up there, and it was the most incredible. And you were eating a corn dog? No, it was a corn dog? No, it was a corn dog. Oh, banana. It was a frozen banana with chocolate.

That was a copse, sir. So I had a frozen banana with chocolate from carnies. That was somebody's cock. That's me. Eyes white shut. Eyes white shut. That would be me. So I'm trying to talk my husband

to come to a sex party with me. Really? He's just weird about. I don't want to do that. Oh. But you do want to experiment a little bit. She wants D.P. That's my.

Okay. Stop. Not Dr. Pepper. With the pebble dice. DP, you've never done that. No. Okay. Have you?

No. Yeah. I've never even done D. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Just pee. Yeah. Only pee.

Chelsea, don't you want to see Paige see somebody or no? Or do you like her single? Oh. Um, I want to see her, I like to see her getting pounded and getting some pipe. I love to see that. What would you guys like to see? Yeah. What do you mean?

That was a weird question. Would you guys like me to be in a relationship? Oh, that's what, yeah. Yeah. Well, I want you to find love, Paige. Real love. Well, what about you? What do you mean?

Don't you need to find love? Yeah, I'm looking for love. You are? What are you looking for? Love in all the wrong places. Looking for love. You know that song. Yeah.

I know a lot of songs. Wow. Start a song. Oh, good game. No matter how hard I try. Ooh. You keep pushing me aside and I can't break through. Yeah, very good.

There's no king to you. Good. Good. You think that. Oh, Bobby. I don't know. And you say that you're saying. You know why I know.

Riva. What? Share. Share. Share. Yeah, I know because I like to watch a lot of talent shows Singing talent shows American God talent is happening American Idol and all that I like a lot of stuff

Did you like Adam Lambert? He was the most talented Yeah Isn't the one that, is that the guy in the Queens? He's like, what do you want from me? What do you want for me? Yeah, but is Adam Landon but the guy that's the lead singer of the new Queen band? Yes, really?

I think so. No, yeah, see if Adam's Lambert is the He replaced Trady Mercury and Queen. at least did for a while. Oh, he did for a while. Yeah, yeah. Because he, that song, you know, who wants to live forever?

Who wants to live forever? That Queen's song? He does a cover of it with Queen. It's better than Freddie Mercury. Dude, Adam Lambert used to hit. What happened to him? You know more than me about the guy. I do.

Just threw Ipo out there. Yeah. I'm going to brag for a minute. here we go guess who followed me a couple days ago on Instagram Brian me Chris Pratt

Adam Lambert Brain me Clay Akin Oh wow What Clay Aiken I'm sure there's bigger people following you

Well that one was fine Yeah yeah yeah Who's the biggest person That follows you? Oh gosh I don't even know You don't look through it You put me on spot

I had to think about it I don't even I don't really like Keep a list You know Do you mean like the biggest Like the most Celebrity.

Not a celebrity, but just someone you look up to. Yeah, I don't know. I've got a few in there. Yeah. A few in the chain. What about you? Yeah. I have a few.

Who are they? Are you going to name them? I don't. No. Why not? Just name one of them. Come on, it's okay to be a fan of celebrities, even if you are one. I think Chris Pratt follows me.

Oh. Oh, that's why you threw that out there, huh? Fishing. Who else? Lewis Capaldi. I think he still does. I don't know if they do. Just about a couple of years.

Name drops. That's cool. That's cool. Oh, I follow that. Yeah, for sure. For sure. Isn't it fun when somebody famous? You're like, you know who I am?

What about when somebody famous unfollows you? Oh. I've had that happen. Yeah. Who? Chris Brent. Same day. He's like,

oops. Accident. No, have you run into a celebrity and they're like, I love you. Yeah. Yeah. And it's funny because. Wynonna Judd, you know this, you know who you want.

I love her. Love. So she followed me for a while and then unfollowed me. Why? Don't know. Edgy. Too edgy? So I didn't know, so we had never talked at this point.

And I was kind of just poking fun. I thought it was funny. So I posted like, oh, why don't know a judge unfollowed me? And the fans went absolutely messaging her. I'm like, y'all leave her alone. And then she refollowed me and then was like, hey, sorry, don't know why I unfollowed you. And now we're friends. Wow

You've met her Oh yeah Oh wow What's you like Amazing Beautiful Beautiful Beautiful

Like unreal You met her I've seen her I've seen her Wait Yeah Yeah So you don't get invited

Those lunch and dinners Nah She lives in Nashville I get left out Yeah Yeah yeah Yeah But I've seen her like

Out of the road Why do you cut Why do you cut page out of things I don't Pages with me almost 24 7 Yeah But the window at you had meetings

That has nothing I have no control over that. I don't have control. She can't bring a plus two. Yeah. And Greg, I want to go. I don't want to see the DP. Greg, Greg.

He doesn't want to miss out. Yeah, yeah. So I got to take Greg. Oh, so Greg goes. Oh. Who would you say? Greg or Paige? Well, it depends.

Greg's been the one. Well, Greg drives. Yeah. He'll drive. Yeah. I don't like to drive. And that's a big factor. Am I going to drive or not?

Yeah. That would be number one, a chauffeur. I got to drive. Yeah. You know, Greg will drive. I would take the driver, too. Yeah. Paige, who's the most famous you person that you met?

That I've met? I know. I wish I would have thought about all this before. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That I met. Maybe like... Seth Rogen started following you on Instagram. Not too long...

Yeah, but that I've actually met. Maybe like... Well, that's a huge follow. That's a huge follow. It was probably by accident. No, I don't think so. Paige, why don't you tell them? Paige, you have the...

I show. people your pratfalls and your farts to anyone that would listen That is not Thank you so much You're the queen of that Spreading

Yeah Thank you The in and out Prat Falls The greatest Pratfall Of all time Hands down The movie theater second

But you don't do that Any more Prat Falls Hey I'm bringing it back You gotta bring it back And I want to do a series And I need you in one Okay You'll be in one

Yeah I'll be in one Okay You have to prattfall No you just have to act Oh I'll act Yeah yeah yeah Yeah Before we move on

Go ahead Paige. What? Won't you go ahead and tell him who the... Who unfollowed me? Who the biggest celebrity that unfollowed you was? Well, John Mayer. Oh, why?

I don't know. Yeah. I don't think she... I was on his close stories. What? And now, just straight to unfollow. I know him. Really?

The nicest guy in the world. They call him right now. Never. Never. Never. No, he's probably at the spear. You know, could I just... Defend him for a second.

It could have been and accidentally unfollow his people, right? Or number two, it's, because you know, people are aloof, right? Here's another thing that could happen, right? And this is what I do, and people get offended all the time. I can't follow

more than a thousand. Bobby, I'm the same way. Yeah, so I keep it at 999. Wow. So if you want to follow someone else, do you have to go through the list? I have to go to the list. And who's, who's, yeah, who's,

and then I feel so bad I'm following them. Because people are going to know if Bobby Lee unfiled. Yeah, so I feel so bad about it. What am I at now? Oh my God, I got to unfollow. Bobby, four people. Bobby, four people got to go.

And we got to know who's going. And do it on the podcast. Do it right now. Do it right now. You want to do it now. We can bleep the games if you want. We'll help you and follow it. All right.

He's like starting up. You already unfollowed me. So that's, uh... You were one of them. Yeah, yeah, you're one of them. Sorry. Dang, this is like split games. So I'm going to go later.

Unfollow Gilbert. Yeah, yeah. You can unfollow me. I don't even know if you do follow me. What you need to do is... Okay, I'm going to unfollow. Just take these that already I'm going to unfollow. Maybe go through and just close your eyes and then stop.

He's got one. Unfollow one. You got to have unfollow Chris Pratt. He's not... No, no, no. No, no. Just fucking no way. You got to do one big celebrity. You got to unfollow.

All right, give me... All right, so... Chris Pratt. Hey, Bobby, be honest. Do you go and check every day to see if Chris Pratt still follows you? Oh, look. Hey. No. Hey, how about your friend?

What? Unfollow John Mayer. No. Does he follow you back? Wait. He doesn't follow me, but I follow him. Yeah. I'm sure he follows you.

Wait, click on his profile. It says follow. Oh, sorry, there's a different account. Oh. But this is who you definitely follow him. We'll see. Okay. See if he's following Bobby.

And if not, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, see if he's following me. Go to following. Oh, let me go inside of it. Here we go. Yeah. Go to following. I will unfollow him if he's not following me.

Yep. Toppin Bobby Oh, he follows you He follows you Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, I can't follow it, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, we gotta figure this out Yeah, we gotta figure this out Is there a hot chick that you followed That does not give you the time of day now, it's time to unfollow her

Or somebody that's not posting, they're just lurking, unfollow Oh, I see You know, I'll have to do this later No, you want us to take it? I already took one Who did you take off? Um, he's down one, 1,0002. I know what um go through his following list and we'll name off some people he should unfollow maybe

how you go through it you just stop oh you have control of my thing no no no okay it's just like public so that's why I can't go through the whole thing I have to type it a name gotcha I don't know who this person is is it time mm-hmm delete okay it's gonna unfollow this person okay I have one more two more two more I want to follow who is it me it's a lot of are they famous people female no that's what I'm saying They're just females, really. Chicks who you thought you were going to bang and you have it. That's what I'm doing now. That's what I'm doing now, man.

Let them go, Bobby. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or if you follow like Barstall Sports or a meme account, maybe you can. Yeah, follow Barstall Sports. Yes. Yeah. Or sometimes it's like actors, like you're on set. Yeah, I'll follow you, you know.

Yeah. Ooh, I want to unfollow her so bad this person. Do it. Hey, Bobby, when people come up and they're like. How many do I have now? You got a thousand. One more. Oh, one more.

One more. This is hilarious. Do you hate when people come up to you and say, Hey, can you follow me? This is my Instagram. What do you do? No, I say, no. Are you crazy?

I mean, the other day I had, so here's what happened. Let me just figure this off. Yeah. All right. You follow Calvin Cater. Who's that? UFC fighter. I love him.

Who's that? I love him. You got to still follow Landon Donovan. Does he follow you? No, he's only following five people. Oh, you're not talking about. Landon Donovan. NLS legend.

Yeah, yeah, where's Lennonovan? Former Team USA captain. What if one of the five is Bobby? Check, check. That's a easy unfollow. That's an easy one. Is he following me? No.

I don't think he is. There's no way. Five people? No, it's just his family. I got it. He's following Tim Howard. Yeah, unfollow. I'm at 999.

Nine, nine, nine. Does that feel better? All right, so here's, let me ask you this. This is what happened the other night. So I'm at a comedy club. Okay. and there's a guy I've never seen before my life, but he's hanging out in the green room, right?

And I go, what's your name? He gives me his name, okay? So then I immediately go to the list of that night, you know what I mean? And he's not on the lineup. That's fine. He's hanging out there. He knew another guy in there. And then he kept going, and then he's like,

yeah, so I just did a special on YouTube. Oh, oh, cool. And then he goes, I need help with it. And I go Oh, okay, it's good. All right. Then he goes, can you No.

Post story? Oh, there we go. And you had no idea who this guy was? I just met him that night. So let me ask you, what do you do? What do you do, Chalse? And it's Chris Pratt. No, it's not, no, it's, no.

If it was like a super, like Louis C.K., I would do it. Yeah. You have I mean? I would probably do it. What? I would. Because I've been asked by a couple of comedians that I've never met before.

But I watched the special first. Yeah. Okay. Maybe say, let me watch your special first. And if I genuinely like it, I'll share it. Then he'll know. Yeah. Also, you're way more famous.

And if I were, I mean, I would never not knowing you and ask, you know what I'm saying? I would never do that. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. If I'm sitting there with Chris Rock And I don't know him that well He knows who I am Because he says hi But it's like I don't

I've never read a conversation with him You could say listen man Everyone asked me to post For them on my stories If I did it for everyone That'd just be my full time job So I don't do it for anybody That's but I do do it

Unless I'm getting paid Unless it's like for a paid Partnership Or it's for you If you ask me Or a friend Or a buddy But like

Different Because we have a friend relationship. You two ask me, I would do it. Yeah, say close friends and acquaintances, but just I can't do it for, you know, if you're not part of the 9-99. Oh.

Oh, good. That's good. Not part of the 9-9-9-9-club, dude. That's really good. Yeah. Wow. I mean, the guy had balls. That's balls.

Yeah, it's real, yeah. He'll blow up because if you have that mentality, if you're going to meet Bobby Leanback, hey, slap me on your story, you're going to do well. Interesting. So it is a good thing that he asked. Yeah, you also can't just use people. You know, yeah.

How are you doing? I don't think I would just talk. It was me. Oh, I thought I heard something. What's going on? No, I told me that I asked you to. You asked? Yeah, that's, let's just try to figure if that's funny.

Let's, let's dissect that, okay? That's great. Is it funny? Yeah. It was pretty good. It was pretty good. Yeah, I guess. You're right, you're right. I didn't hear it the first time. That's why.

Yeah. You had to be there. Yeah. Yeah. So it wasn't you. It wasn't me. Yeah. Yeah. But sometimes if people ask me something, I'll be like, message me. I go, send it to me on Instagram, and I'll look for it tonight. And then, you know. Nice. Yeah. And then sometimes I do, and then sometimes I won't. What about this? You do a show. You're leaving. You're packing and you're going out. There's a fan. And they're like, what are you doing tonight? It happens every night. And then what do you say? I will literally go, honey's, I'm so tired. I go, I am. Well, I heard from Pais

Are you guys all gonna go eat? No, honies. I'm picking up, I'll probably pick up tacos and go back to my hotel And can I go? And I'll let it go, no, honies. Nope.

Honeys. There's no circumstances where you would go come. No. Oh, I've done it. No. She actually does do random fans. I do random fans.

Wait, come like a lo to come? Or what are you? You'll do random fans. No, no, no. What I'm saying is, is that like if there's a guy who's, I like, who's a comic, right? Or some random dude that's like, you know,

and I'll be like, all right, come. I've had, not after a show. I've hung out with people before shows. We've been staying at the same hotel with people. We'll go, you know, get a car. That, but after a show, I'm so, I'm like, I am crashing. I'm not doing anything to come. I'm crashing.

Besides putting that satisfying pro on your pussy. I'm rubbing my pussy and going to bed. People think that we party, though, and drink, and we don't really drink or do anything like that. You don't smoke hot? No, I smoke pot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, and I'll go smoke with fans and stuff.

Oh, you know. But I won't, no. We rarely will go drink with them. Okay, so you have a tour. I got a tour coming up. Yeah. Called the Loose Lips Tour. The Loose Lips.

You have another hour now? Well, I do. I've got about 35 to 40 minutes, and then the last 20 minutes I'm doing kind of like some crowd stuff. We're doing a couple of segments. Oh, I see. I see. And does Paige do the shows with you?

No. No. Why? I just don't have anything written up. You don't do stand-up? No. And she would be so good at it, Bobby. Why don't you do it?

You're missing on a large chunk of money, and I think you can do it. Okay. She's so quick. Yeah. She's so witty. Her crowd work would be. It's fear. Bro.

It's fear. She would be so, I've been telling her this. Why do you live in fear? I don't live in fear. I really never even knew about the, comedy scene really until I met her and then moving to Nashville and watching all these comedians. I'm like, this is a freaking art. I like quick witty jokes. If a joke

drags on, I'm fucking lost. Yeah, but then you you learn from going on. Oh, I learned from just watching other comedians and I watch the crowd and... You're doing it. Doing stand-up? Yeah. Okay. Even if she just did crowdwork? Bro. You're doing it! Okay, I'll do it. Yeah, you're doing it. I have some notes written down to my phone for stand-up. I want to test our friendship

real quick. Okay. If I relapsed and I lost everything and I was in the streets and I run in a deal. I'm like, could I spare some change?

You were to talk like that? Yeah. Spare some change. Chelsea, Page? Because my accent will come back. Yeah, oh, yeah. Yeah, because I'm just hungry. Like Ken Watanabe in the exception.

No, like in Batman Recurans. Yeah, Batman begins. I am Bobby. I am Bobby Damn, bro, that's your voice That's great Yeah, that's me

How much would you give me? A place to stay You wouldn't give me any cash? No, it'd be like He's gonna go blow it on drugs I'd be like, what do you need? Are you down bad to where you just look so cracked out? I leave here

Are you down bad? You'll suck a cock for some meth? Yes. Then I probably wouldn't give you cash. We'd go buy you something to eat. Oh my God. you're not friends with me at all then there's no friendship

we don't want to enable we care about you we would give you a place to stay we would shower you yep oh you get me a hotel I'd make you a home cooked meal no we'd bring you home with us and put you in a robe yeah and slippers oh yeah we know Asians love slippers yeah yeah yeah yeah

or barefoot I could do barefoot okay yeah yeah yeah so you would ship me back let's say it's in L.A. You would ship me back to Nashville I would live in whose house your house we would switch you off week to week week yeah and I would live where

in your basement in the spare bedroom in the spare bedroom right and you just let me know when you're hungry well door dash yeah so go check out

the viral podcast with Paige and Chelsea also check out um their your tour my tour the loose lips tour

go to get tickets at my website which is eat my trash dot com and for me to go to do viral podcast I'd have to go to Nashville right we'd please be on yeah I would love to go really next time you have a show in Nashville or something yeah yeah I don't ever have shows

really you never go you never go never go never go when's the last time you were in Nashville well I did the rhyme in theater with Andrew probably three years ago okay so you're I haven't played like any rooms there in a very very long time are you do are you do what do you mean are you do for a show in Nashville I am due

get that off the screen nice ass it took that for fans on sale yeah yeah that's you That's me. Nice, that? Well, my ass doesn't look like that. Page helped me pose to where it created that. It don't look like that in real life.

What does it look like in real life? Just flat. Okay. It's not. Wow. Okay. It's an illusion. And if you want to see more than that, I do a calendar of year where I show full tit.

Yeah. But no vage. No, I can't get my boils away. Okay. No, I can't be doing that. All right. Give them a round of applause, everybody. Thank you.

I got a bolluloole. I got this line from a movie. I got this line from a movie. Tell me what a movie did it is. Hey, a thousand bucks. We skipped to our third date. right and she's like what is that and it's a parking garage hand handy I got from war dogs you ever see war dogs I know I was at home this weekend and I was watching rush hour

again do you understand the words that come out of my mouth that's Chris Tucker Chris Tucker and Jackie Chan You know Jackie Chan does his own stunts That's pretty impressive It's pretty It's pretty goddamn impressive I'll tell you that You ever picked up a kung fu

Just I mean I don't know Like all those stuntmen in the movies Like do they pick up kung fu Are they trained Thank you, fuck up, chak the fuck up. Lee! Bobby Lee!

Sorry, man, I'm just pumped up with oat milk. He's pumped up with oat milk. Well, Jaime, how was your week? man who man chu who cho man who cho man cho man chou man yeah total girl if you're a chinese what would our your name be rubber ely no what would your name be chinese name yeah yeah tongue chung what no just listen do that one with your mouth yeah bong tong ping pong tong i think tong is your name Tong. Yeah, yeah.

That's a good. Thanks, man. Tongue. Tong. Yeah. I watch weapons. What did you think of, give me a review, bud. Oh, man.

Give me your review. How much time do you have? Well, we have an hour for this podcast. Okay, yeah. Yeah, I liked it. I loved it. It's a good movie. Yeah.

Were you scared at all? No. It was very, like, it was very fun to watch. It was like up there between that and Superman, but I chose weapons. Ooh Close call But no Weapons was a good movie

I liked it I loved it What do you think the message was Oh yeah Yeah what was that lady Doing up there Okay Skip my question

Yeah yeah What was the lady doing up there What was Ms. Gladys She was witchcraft That was witchcraft Yeah That was witchcraft Do you think that was normal

Yeah I thought she was just Getting those kids To like test out But how do you think she did it Through witchcraft Oh Yeah

But why Because I think it had to do with her youth or she was getting sick and it was helping her. No. Well, tell me, oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Siskel. I think she was getting those kids to, like, try new flavors

for chicken noodle soups, you know? Oh, that's an interesting take. Yeah, I'm a take... We didn't see a chicken or noodle in the movie. Yeah, you did. You got campbell soup. Oh, that's what it was. Chicken noodles. That was... As well, she was eating them soup.

Take part, take that part out because I forgot. You're right. chicken noodles that was a funny job soup yeah yeah I remember that was good that was a good movie yeah yeah do you eat canned soup ever

no I'm like you make your own fresh soup fresh Mexican soup well sopita give me the recipe I just put water tomatoes in

you put okay let me see I'm I'm your student we're in culinary class um teacher see cat what's up Bobby Hey, Tong. I'm Mr. Tong.

Okay. Benedict Wing. Benedict Wing. Very good. Very funny joke. Play on words. That's what you told me. Yeah.

He stole my joke. You used his joke? Yeah, he told me. But I heard it, so. I met Benedict Wong once. Oh, yeah. You remember? At Dums.

Yeah, and what a sweet guy. He's sort of like the English. just bigger version of me, maybe. Yeah. More talented. He got so talented. And what a guy. What a great guy.

What a blessing in life. For Benedict to be existing? Yeah. He's a good actor. He's a very good actor. Very good actor. Who are your favorite Asian actors, do you think? Give me top five.

Mail. Let's go male first. Mail first. Like comedic actors or just actors? Actors in general. Actors in general. I don't think you can name five. Jackie

Cham One Yeah The villain in Rush Hour 2 You gotta say the name You gotta say the name You gotta say the name, but I don't know man Um

Shit Ali Wong No, male I said Oh male Okay You, you're funny All right Ken John

Oh wait Yeah, yeah Ken John Ken John No that's his name The doctor one Yeah What's his name? Ken Jung

No, it's not Kenjong It is I'm friends He's like his friend I've known for 30 years Of course it is You see that photo Oh yeah

Ken Chong Ken Jong Ken Jong So me Ken Zhang You already know Benedict Wong Give me two more Jackie Chan you said

One more Is the guy No just say the name On Star Trek Is he Asian? Yeah he is Sulu? Sulu's dead.

No, no, no, no, no. He's a Romanian. The Asian one or the black one, hi. Yeah. Asian one. Yeah. Yeah, he's Asian. What's his name?

You're trying to think of... The old one. Not him, the old one. What's his name? This one? This guy's... Something with a T. Try your best.

Yeah. It doesn't rhyme with Tearyaki, but... It doesn't rhyme with Terry. It rhymes with Teiraki. Oh, it does. Yeah. Right? Try it.

Mr. Tanaki. What's his Star Trek name? Mr. Tanaki. I don't know. Bobby just said it. He's on a... Sulu. Sulu.

Yeah, yeah. Oh. Hello. Dude, that's a real good George... That's a good... Diqai. Oh, George Takai. Yeah.

Yeah. Not Terriaki. Yeah, yeah. Hello. Hello. I'm George Takai. Hello. You know what I mean?

Yeah. I'm the first Asian gay. ever to exist he was yeah well he's gay you know that he was right he's still alive oh he's still alive

yeah yeah he switched over last year at 86 yeah so he's hetero now and then that's John Chow oh the actor who died

Spock he died right yes he Spock died yeah what was his name the actor's name yeah I'll see his first name Leonard Napoleon no

you got the right first letter right Leonard Ney Yeah There we go Niposh Neepos

What's the name? Leonard Nimoy Yeah Strange names back then, huh? George Tikai William Shatner That's a handsome face

Well, it's, I don't know The structure It's long you like long faces or short short faces? Because you have a fat short You want to hear something funny

Yeah go ahead So I was You need to get some tests done On your mind No okay Yeah yeah There's something going on Okay never mind

I'm not gonna tell you No tell me now No because Don't be embarrassed Don't be embarrassed Just throw it out there So I was with this date

This past weekend At the shows Okay can I just say something About your dates Oh my God You talk about Dallas I mean Every time we go to a gig

You're with a different A different Hispanic girl. No, I'm not. You've blown up a spot. Do you see how he did that? No, I'm not. No, they're just friends, but this one was a date. Okay, tell me about it.

And she's taking me home because I didn't drive. And she has car play. And, like, her friend, Bree texted her. And it was, like, a sunflower emoji next to her name. And then her next friend. Jenny, she had a sunshine emoji next to her name. And then the next text was Gabe, which was a teddy bear in the kissy face. And I asked her, who is that?

She's like, oh, that's my dad. Whoa. That's not your dad. That's not your dad. No, it's my dad. And he texted again, I was like, that's not your dad. And he's like, no, he's just a friend. Then why lie?

Why lie? It's not your dad? I don't know he's not your dad. It's your friend. And then I texted And I told her, what's my emoji? And she said, a potato. So I texted her.

Okay, okay, it's enough of that. You scoring this is insane. I know. I thought it would help. It's not. Low-hanging film, was that her daddy? I was waiting for somebody to say that. From Bobby, I have a rake.

Okay. And then George, I have a Bible. What? What about me? Nothing. A leaf. It's a rush hour. Yeah.

Tell me about it. Do you understand? Stop doing that voice. We have to think of it the first time. Try a different quote maybe too. Hey, man, you guys don't go out low chicken wings or some baby bag ribs. And then the Chinese man goes, the Chinese man goes, no soul food here. Only Chinese food.

Ain't nobody else saying anything by no soul food. Keep going. Keep going. I don't know. You don't know. Ricky Tam. Rudy Tam. You know Danny Crane?

No, I don't know Danny Crane. You know Danny Crane. You're friends with him? No, he's fiction. Okay. He's played by William Shatner. Really? Yeah, Danny Crane.

Oh, which show is that? Boston Legal? Yeah. Boston Legal? Yeah, yeah, good show. It was a good show. Yeah. And he shot the guy with a BB gun?

Yeah. Do you like him? Danny Crane William Chattner William Chattner Yeah Yeah Yeah he's pretty good

You know how old is he now He's probably almost 95 Yeah You met him I told you that story Oh Yeah yeah yeah yeah Wait

I'm forgetting which one The Billboard Award story Got it Do you remember it? Yeah that was when you were hosting Right No Oh it was an interview

On the red card No man What is this I get a call Score it though I have to score it I get a call from my people

they said you're going to do the Billboard Awards and you're going to do a sketch with William Shatner because we know you love William Shatner because I'm a Star Trek fan

So they fly me all over to Vegas and I show up in a tent and there's like this poker table there and the sketches you're going to be sitting at the poker table Shatner's going to come in and you guys have this

I forgot what the dialogue was but you know something that I had memorized and stuff so we wait there for like an hour. He's not there yet. And then he shows up. And there was another actor they had flown in. I forget it was. And Shatner goes, points to me and the other guy and goes, you're out, you're out. I'm doing it on my own. And then the next thing I know I'm on a plane flying back to LA. Do you remember that? Oh, my. You're out. And I was so livid. I'm still a Star Trek fan,

but it was heartbreaking. Because I'm just a huge fan that was just super heartbreaking. We should have And then another, I ran into Jordy LaForge when I was on Animal Practice, and I walked past him on set, it was at Paramount. And I go, I'm a big fan, oh my God. And he goes,

thank you. Like that? Walking away from me. Thank you. And I was like, oh, I thought I was going to have a fucking discussion with you about it. I'm not just fucking some guy that works there. I'm on a show bitch. God.

Thank you. Yeah, I've never run into a Star Trek person and have them go, you know what I mean? Like, have a conversation with them. You know? I mean, John Cho. That's the newer ones. Yeah. Just wait, have you met George Sakai? Yeah, oh yeah, he's nice

to me. Yeah, I've met George Takai. Yeah, he's very good. Well, I think it's the Asian connection. Hello, Bobby. Oh, Bobby. That was okay, man. You start off with an improv. Me? Yeah.

Yeah. Give me something. No, just go. You start up with the improv. Give me something. Give me something. Yeah. Okay, give me a work location, occupation, and who I am.

Okay. And action. Go. You work at Target. No, no. You just improvise. Just go right into the same. You're in the scenes.

You're going to tell them. And go. You tell me. Hey, Matthew. Hey, boss. Yeah, I know you're new to Target. but Target has strict policies here and you know

as a sales manager you need to do better you need to clock in way 20 minutes before your schedule time and we need to have a talk with you okay so give me the talk I mean because I was here on time

but okay no you're not I might bet you know because my car was there was something going on with it I'm sorry it'll never happen again listen man I know you've been going through a lot well I mean I told you last week what I was going to

yeah I know And, you know, when a pet dies, you know, it life. Life happens, Matthew, okay? You grow up, you're 29, you live with your parents. Wow. Yeah, I do. And your pet died, ooh-l-la. I get it, dude, but it's like...

Does someone say, ooh-l-l-la? Oh, it's just me? What's up, Renee? Renee. Hey, I'm so sorry. Yeah, yeah. My bad, my dad. My bad.

My bad. I just heard uh-l-la-la-la-la, yeah, go. By that, by that. Yeah, yeah, go do the bakery stuff. I love France. Listen. I really do. So, I know we put you in a position where you need to sell solar panels.

Yeah, I mean, can I just say something, boss? I don't know if people come into Target. I don't know what we created this whole solar panel division. You know what I mean? I just don't think that people know that we sell solar panels. I think that's the problem. Look, we pay you $18 an hour. Yeah.

We're going to get our monies. worth. And also, can I just say another thing? Can I just say? You need to sell at least 20 per day to white folks. I understand that white people love it. But also, we're selling

now windmills. You know what I mean? And we can only fit one in the store. I don't think people know that they can. Do you know what about you? You created this section, all right? Of energy, alternative energy. But I don't think that's why people come to target.

Okay, listen, Matthew. I think you're resenting me Yes Because I'm dating your mom right now Okay, yeah Maybe there is a resentment I'm your stepfather But I am not

I am Well my mother is 90 years old Paralyzed from the neck down From a stroke Right And I'm there to take care of her Well, okay And you're over here

That's why the only job I could give you, okay? So sell me 20 solar panels By the end of the day By the end of 8 p.m. Oh my God I'll try so much

or I'm out. Oh, you're out. Okay. Thank you. Thank you, boss. That was pretty good. That was pretty good. You're much better.

Much better. Lots of added information. A lot of ad information. The oat milk. It's not the same as caffeine. Yeah, yeah. So that oat milk you're drinking.