TigerBelly - Brad Williams and The Low Five

Episode Date: January 22, 2025

Comedian Brad Williams makes his first appearance and Bobby refuses to talk about dwarves. We chat Snow White, Peter Dinklage, famous little people, candy corn, pocket Hercules, Legoland bully, and Pixie from Chucklebutt. Get 5 dollars off your next order at www.magicspoon.com/belly. Or look for Magic Spoon on Amazon or in your nearest grocery store. That’s www.magicspoon.com/belly for five dollars off. www.hims.com/belly for your personalized hair loss treatment options.  Download the app today and use code BELLY to get $50 instantly after you play your first $5 lineup! PrizePicks. Run Your Game!” “Established in 2025” has a nice ring to it, doesn’t it? Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial period at www.shopify.com/tigerbelly, ALL LOWERCASE. www.shopify.com/tigerbelly to start selling with Shopify today.

🎵 Hey, don't look at my sugar look at my life. Choco chocobo. OK. It's so small. It's so cute. Dude, I saw that first episode of that show pretty good. Pretty good, right? Pretty good. Dude, that scene with the mask, American Medieval, is that what you're saying? Yeah, yeah

With that girl talking the arrowhead her head it was insane with what show You saw the whole thing It's called American primal It's on Netflix. Okay, what? Tally it had nothing to do with you do it up. It has nothing to do with you. Do another one. It has nothing to do with you, Dan. Yeah, I just like to know good shows.

I like to know good shows, Bobby. Yeah, I mean, what I was upset about was I saw the Snow White trailer. You didn't get an audition for that? No dwarves did. Oh, that is true. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I mean, I saw it. how many are there? Eight of them? Uh, there, there's seven.

There's been seven and we're all... There's seven of them. There's seven of them in the movie. Once the first, once the first trailer came out for the first live action Disney, all the dwarf community was just sitting there going like, when are we gonna get our shot? When are we gonna get our movie? And then, uh, And then it happened. And then Dinklage said no.

So Dinklage, is he the president of your people? Yeah. More like everything that he says. Yes, more like a dictator. We didn't elect him. There was a coup and he just took over. He's the pole pot of, yeah, he's the pole pot of dwarves. I pick him out, dude. Yes, we, we all are.

Yeah, we all are. Cause here, cause here's the thing. Uh, they were all set to have dwarves play the dwarves as is good. So we could have, you know, work. And then, uh, Dinklage went on the mark baron podcast and said are we still doing the snow white dwarf thing? I can't believe we're doing that that bastard. He's sabotaging your whole people. Yeah, and then Funny and it's got outrageous and it's gotta stop Disney to a dwarf. They're not even employing He's not even on the payroll and he's just like ah Tinklage spoke Okay, get all the dwarves out get him out and then they replaced him with Snow White and the seven magical beings Which if you if you look this up it they they they look like a hacky sack

Circle at Chico State. It's just it's just it's just a bunch of loose-fitting clothes Someone of every race creed color. There's just a bunch of loose fitting clothes, someone of every race, creed, color. There's one actual little person. Okay. Cool. Where? In the Snow White and the Seven Magical Beings. There. So that was the original dwarves for the film before they changed it. Yes. Does that not look like- Those are dwarves? I know. There's one. That looks like if the rejected members of Yo Gabba Gabba that that is that sorry I got I got a I got a four I got a Five-year-old so it's yeah Yeah, you got it exactly so yeah that that was Snow White and the seven magical

DEI hires Because oh and look at that. Not one Asian. Wow. Snow White's Mexican. Wow. What is going on around here? Don't be wrong. There were some angry white people that were like, why is Snow White Mexican? I'm like, I don't mind that one. I don't mind it. I don't mind that one either. don't mind it. I don't mind that one either. One woman living with seven other people, that seems pretty Mexican to me. Let me ask you another thing. Is Gal Gadot the Wicked Witch of the Witch, right? Yeah,

she's the mirror mirror on the wall. Yeah, she. And it's like, she's the fairest one. How could she be the hottest one? And she's like, oh no. She's just way uglier than Snow White, right? But see, now they've switched it. Because in this new Disney movie, it's, oh, Snow White has better inner beauty. They talk about Snow White having more inner beauty than the Queen.

But inner beauty's not a real thing. I mean mean Bobby, you and I know lots of women. If I go to Raya, you know what I mean? They don't shoot inner beauty in the Raya. And we all know women just will look at another woman and be like, oh that bitch, her inner beauty is so much better than mine. Yeah, you know what's crazy too is your wife is hot, right? Yes. That's so crazy. That's crazy. How did that ever happen? I don't

know. I didn't say anything wrong. Let me finish my statement. Are you mad because she's Asian? I got one of yours. No, no, no. She's half. That doesn't count for us. Oh, she would hit you. She's not half? No, she is. It does not count. But it's a very sensitive subject to her, because she, because, because. Well, I mean, talk to her white dad then. Well, I wish I could, but no one can find him. They killed him, huh? Yeah.

No, he's, no, he's gone. He's a piece of shit. He's a. Really? Yeah, he's a deadbeat. And yeah, he's. And the mom's Asian, no? Yes.

What kind of Asian is your mom? The mom, I mean. Chinese. Ooh. All right, give moms Asian. Oh, yes. What kind of Asian is your mom the mom? I mean Chinese All right, give me your Asian rankings Bobby give me your Asian rankings who's number one obviously Korean I don't have a ranking but no, let's get let's hear If Chinese isn't you let's hear your rankings rank the Asians Bobby family few the top five answers are on the board Rank the Asians, Bobby. Family feud. Top five answers are on the board. Filipino number one. Thank you so much, sir. That's for you, Gilbert. I'll take that.

Is that because the Filipinos are mixed race? I don't know what you're getting at there. I just woke up, so I don't know what you're getting at. The Spaniards created you. Yeah. Anyway, that's number one. They also created Mexicans. Spain really like putting themselves out there They created also. I love the movies. I love the movies of Vietnamese to Oh put you in full metal jacket I'm really into the movies big big fan of that war. I Think it's my favorite war. Yeah for sure. Yeah, what's your favorite war?

War of 1812. That's a pretty good one. Yeah, it's pretty good I don't know much about it though. Tell me about the war of 1812. I just said it cuz I know the name And a bait intention, you know when I watch movies like Save any more movies saving pirate Ryan whatnot, right? You guys never fought in any war Oh dwarfs. Yeah, no, you'd never see yeah, we did that one Here's another thing. I want to say too, okay Why are you guys in the zombie like when you guys get bitten by zombies you guys aren't you know guys will turn into zombies We're underground

We're hiding we forge. I Don't get oh so according to war wait no, that's not no that's not a zombie people and that's it Yeah, that's like a different type of dwarf. There there's they're not even dwarves Yeah, so is a hobbit a dwarf hobbit is not a dwarf, but there are I don't want to know what you guys I woke I can't I woke up in my head. I was like don't Dude, you went hot. I just realized what my rule was. I was like, don't do it because he always gets brought, it always comes up, the dwarves them.

So don't do it. And I opened up with Snow White. That was my fault. I was confused. No, but I got to rant on Dinklage. So I like it. Yeah. We got to take him out, dude.

Yeah. Where does he live? I don't know. He never comes to the meeting. Yeah. No, you've never met him? I've never met him. There's no like meeting you guys have we we have meetings Really do we do have meetings? Yeah, I'm going to one in July. Oh

And who goes to that one little people? I know which ones Give me the famous ones. Well, okay. We'll talk about Dwarves. It's a little bit longer We'll break it a little bit Just this one's Bobby I'll talk about it. Oh, that's Switchgears. That's Switchgears. Okay, I'm so sorry. Whatever you want. It's okay. It's your show. Yeah, yeah. Well, it's our show, you know? I feel like I just woke you up.

Why, no? Are those the famous ones? Oh, great. I'm not even on the list. We'll find you. Don't worry. We'll find you. Tyrion Lannister! Fucking, Dinklage's character is on the list. How are you not on that list? I should be on the list. There's multiples that are dead. Who's Angelo Rossozito? Go to Angelo Rossozito. Verne Troyer. Dead. Billy Barty. Dead. Herve Villacheff. Dead. 2-11. Kenny Baker. Dead. Okay, Angelo Rosasito, do you know him? I don't know Angelo.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, he's 2'11". That's pushing it. Of what? That's pushing it to nothing. He's pushing it to nothing. He's trying to be something. He's pushing it on the living.

What are you doing, dude? What are you doing? Get off this list. We want you to exist, Angelo. Right? That's a really good observation, Gilbert. General Tom Thumb. Yeah, what are you doing? What are you doing? We want you to exist and go home. Right?

Really good observation, Gilbert. General Tom Thumb. Dead. I'm just going down the list. So, I mean, what... The last question I have about it. Bridget the Midget should have been killed by a lot of black dick. No, what's the line? What? She tried. She tried to kill herself.

Is there a line of height? 4'11". No, sorry. the line? What's the line? She tried she tried to kill herself. Is there a line of black dick? Four foot eleven. No, sorry four foot ten. That's the light. So but yeah, but if somebody doesn't have dwarfism Yeah, and the person is just four foot eleven. Mm-hmm. Would that be still considered dwarfism? No, it's just considered Vietnamese God that's what that was. I always thought that I always thought that I always thought that they're just yeah, they're really small people Yeah, they're just very tiny people. I have one more last question. I don't want to be rude, but you know, we'll move on. I'm sorry. We'll move after this, right? You're not being rude. Yeah. Um, you've never done doggy style, right?

There's no way. It's my best position. Oh, you stand completely straight. Exactly. Now you're using your head. Don't get angry. I'm not angry. You'll know when I'm angry. So you do, you stand completely still.

I stand up. You stand up, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And she chooses her position. Yes, she chooses her height level. That's real good. Yeah. Wow, that's incredible.

It's great. It's the best position to do with a dwarf. Yeah. If any women are listening out there and they want to have sex with a little person, not me because I'm married. But if you have sex with another dwarf, yeah, doggie style is the best position you could do. And I'm going to say one last sexual question,

and I want to be rude. Six inches. But you've not had enough. Oh, hey. The Filipino is impressed. Wow. White guy's like, eh. The Filipino is impressed. Wow. White guys like, eh. This is not funny.

What? Agent John Perry like, oh my god. Amazing, white guys. It's not that kind of show. I don't know what you're doing, but it's not this kind of show. We don't talk about stuff like that. Thank god there's not a black guy here. This is y'all.

I'm telling you right now. Boring. I y'all. I'm telling you right now. I'm warning you. I'm warning you right now. Don't bring it back up again. That's the kind of show we do. Okay. Okay. Okay.

Penis size, crazy. Yeah, who needs it? What I wanna know is, and I don't wanna be rude, but you've never, there's no way. I don't even know how this works. Okay. You've never locked eyes with a girl when you're having sex? Of course I have.

It doesn't make any sense because if you're doing missionary. Yeah. Walk him through it, yeah. Right? I'm the girl. Okay. Your head is here. Play it out, play it out.

No, no. Get out of here! Sit down, sit down! Sit down right now, sit down right now. I'm not doing role play with you. I'll show you how it lines up. I don't want to see you. I don't want to see you. I don't want to see you. Oh, get out of here! Sit down, sit down! Sit down right now, sit down right now. I'm not doing role play with you. I'll show you how it lines up. I know, alright. Let me pull your hair.

No, no, no, no. You sit down there. What are you doing, dude? Get up like that. Let me put a finger in your ear. No, please don't stop. Why are you talking this way right now? It turns me on. Okay. No.

Let's move on from here. All right, Bobby, Bobby. Because if you look at me, look at how we're sitting. We're at the same height sitting. Yeah. My torso is the same size as your torso. So when it's for sex. Okay, guy, guy, guy.

Hot claim. I don't know what you're trying to do. That's a hot claim. Yeah, that's a hot claim dude, and I disagree. We're lined up. We're not lined up to do. That's a hot claim. Yeah, that's a hot claim, dude. And I disagree. We're lined up. We're not lined up, dude. That's how it works. Oh, so you have a regular torso.

It's just your legs are incredibly short? Yes, legs and arms. Legs, arms are tiny. All right, well, you know what? We'll have to believe you because we're not gonna do any of these actions. You wanna stand up? Get the fuck out of here, dude.

You little guy. No, no, no, don't even get out of here, dude. Get out of here. No, no, I don't wanna even get out of here, dude. Get out of here. No, no, I don't wanna look in your eyes. Let's talk about other things. I don't wanna talk about this anymore, okay? I can't do my eyes. He's looking away.

I'm not looking away. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've looked in your eyes before, guy. So what I wanna talk to you about is, do you ever talk to Carlos anymore? Yeah, we were supposed to have dinner last week, but we had to cancel last minute. Oh, so you still see him?

Yeah. Good. I don't, I feel bad about it, but I should, huh? I always think about him though. I think about him all the time. He's a friend. He's a friend of mine too, I love him, but I'm just saying that,

so for those of you who don't know, Brad and I went through the Carlos Mencia Opening Academy. Yeah, I was there for four years. How long were you? Probably that long too. Yeah, and so, and people have their opinions and that's fine, I'm not here to change them. I'm here to say that I'm always friends with them

and I probably wouldn't be here having the success of currently having him. I 100% agree with you. But that I would not be agree with you. But. That I would not be here, you wouldn't. No, me either, me either. Me either? Yeah.

What I find to be a little strange is that when other comics, let's preferably, I mean more specifically white comics. When they get accused of stealing jokes, they're in the doghouse for about six months and they get to come back. Yeah. If you think about it.

Yeah. I don't want to name names but there are many white comics that have been accused of something. Male and female. Yeah, exactly. And the videos will come out similarly where they put jokes side-by-side And it's pretty obvious that there was some influence there and they go ah

Shame shame bad on you so I also know they're not I don't want to name his name because I love the guy But yeah, there's another Hispanic dude that recently was accused of stealing You know I mean, and he's out of the dog house. My point being is that, why him specifically? Because he did a lot? I don't know. I wish I could answer that question. ["Magic Spoon"] Magic spoon, magic spoon, high protein cereal.

Eat it at noon. As a kid, I loved eating cereal, guys. I still eat it today noon as a kid I loved eating cereal guys I still eat it today as an adult but I don't want all that sugar y'all most cereals don't give the protein I need I love protein I don't know if you know that but then I found magic spoon a nostalgically delicious cereal that tastes just like my childhood five favorites but without the sugar and with a ton of protein with magic spoon has always turned their super popular cereal into high protein treats. They are light, crispy and taste just like those classic crunchy cereal bars. Magic Spoon's

treats are so delicious and have already become my favorite before and after the gym snack. Every serving of Magic Spoon high protein cereal has crazy macros. 13 grams of protein, 0 grams of sugar, and 4 grams of net carbs. They come in so many nostalgic flavors like cocoa and cinnamon roll. We have fruity natural flavor. Wow. We have blueberry muffin. Okay. We have peanut butter. Nice. And what are you eating there Bobby? Cocoa man is so good get five dollars off your next order at magic spoon comm slash belly or look for a magic spoon on Amazon or in your nearest grocery store, that's magic spoon comm slash belly for five dollars off him

If you lost your hair it doesn't mean you can't find it again Try him hair loss solutions If you lost your hair, it doesn't mean you can't find it again. Try Hims Hair Loss Solutions and you'll be joining hundreds of thousands of subscribers who found their hair again. Hims provides you with convenient and quality access to a range of hair loss treatments that work all from the comfort of your couch. Hims makes treating hair loss simple with doctor trusted options and clinically proven ingredients like finasteride and minoxidil that can grow your hair in as little time as three to six months.

Choose from personalized chewable oral spray and serum treatments to find what works best for you. The process is simple and 100% online, so there are no uncomfortable doctor visits. Answer a few questions and a medical provider will determine if treatment is right for you. If prescribed, your treatment is sent directly to you for free. Start your free online visit today at HIMS.com slash belly. That's HIMS.com slash belly for your personalized hair loss treatment options.

HIMS.com slash belly. Results vary based on studies of topical and oral minoxidil and finasteride. Prescription products require an online consultation with a healthcare provider who will determine if a prescription is appropriate. Restriction Supply, see website for full details and important safety information. These are the rules of Tiger Belly. I'm willing to talk about my penis. I don't want to visualize your penis. Oh, not my penis? Yeah, because the way I visualize your penis is the way I want to see it for the rest of my life.

Oh, okay, which is much smaller than yours. No, it looks like candy corn. Wait, yellow? Orange? It's tri-colored. But it's got like a little cute little candy candy a ship dry colored It's dry and there's a debate on if it's actually good or not Well, let's talk about candy Okay, because I'm not a candy corn person. I think it's I think it tastes like candle wax

I think it's horrible and I feel like as a little person my judgment on candy should be held in a higher regard That's interesting. Let me tell you something about candy, my little friend. Okay? Is this that- I'm like trying to get high from you. Yeah, yeah. I believe, I truly believe this,

that you don't have the corner stone, corner on candy. I agree. That came out wrong, that came out wrong. I agree, let me say that again, okay? I believe that my opinion is on candy is just as valid as your opinion on candy. I would absolutely.

Just because you're a little person doesn't mean that you have like other senses in your tongue or, you know what I mean? Yeah, well, cause that's one of the weird things about being a little person is that every other racer, whatever, they have some stereotypes, positive or negative, but usually they're based in some sort of truth or fact or even realm of possibility. Dwarf stereotypes are all fantastical. They're all like, we live in caves.

No, I've never heard of caves. Leprechaun. Have you ever heard of caves? Yeah, because we're underground and we forge oh Because you're doing the hobbit again. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, but the hobbits didn't forge dwarves forge We like make swords underground and shit. That's not a cave. That's a mine. Yeah, okay, so we mine Is that not right? Yeah, we you're not like a bear you're like like Like you're not like a bear, you're like out there with... We're a cuff really. Like if you play like Skyrim for instance, right?

And you go into a dwarven like, you know, ancient ruin, it's always sophisticated technology and there's a lot of engineering going on. So it's not like a cave, it's more of like, you would like to go and mine for like, mithril. You know what mithril is? It sounds like something you've smoked. No, no.

Do you know what mithril is? I don't. See, that's what makes me sad. I'm a horrible dwarf. That makes me sad. I don't know what mithril is. You don't know what mithril is? I don't.

Does anyone in this room know what mithril is? A mithril... You don't, E.J. A mythical mineral? Okay, come to the mic and talk about mithril, my friend. Is it a mythical mineral? Come to the mic and talk about mythical my friend. Is it a mythical mineral? Yeah it's like an ore that's usually like high level and like most like fantasy RPG games. Like if you get like a mythical sword, what? You know what? A mythical sword? Sit down EJ. When I

walked in this room I was wondering why there was no women, now I know. That's rude. I don't like that. To you, okay? I'll tell you, that may be true each day. But you know, Mithril is in the movie, The Hobbit, or The Lord of the Rings, and guess what it was? Which one? Well, I mean, Frodo would have died without Mithril. Oh, I'm not a Lord of the Rings guy.

You've never seen any of the movies? I've seen a few of them. I've been to Hobbiton. I know you did. You told me about it. You bragged about it. I saw the photos. I saw the photos. It was awesome. Yeah. Yeah, it was great. I went home. Yeah, okay. I've been to Seoul, Korea, too. I mean, it's the same thing. Yeah, right. Seoul, Korea, New Zealand. Same thing. Same thing. Same thing. So that's Mithril.

Mithril coat. So it's basically, Bill will give it to Frodo. Right. And then there's a couple... Is that the thing that makes him invisible? No. It's Harry Potter. Oh, invisibility cloak.

Sorry, I got my... I think there's a... Across my nerd streams. No, there's a cloak that he wears. Okay. Anyway, there's a cloak that he wears. Anyway, there's two instances where he could have died. The first, do you remember the movie? I remember some guys riding elephants into battle.

Okay, that's the third one. I don't know what the fuck. You're hopping around. There was a big fight. Those were trees. There was a big fight on a dam. I know that one. So may myself my friend. Yeah, sure God What would you remember when in the first movie when what do you call those?

Specters they were like the human specter. You remember when Samwise Gamgee and those guys were cooking bacon Jedi Knights No, you're doing a different movie. Oh, sorry, wait. Which one's that? It's a different genre, you fucktard. Okay. There you go. Damn it, dude.

And then, remember, and then one of them stabbed him, Frodo. Are these the Klingons? If you say shit like that again, I swear to God, I'm gonna kick your little guy out of here, man. And then in the next movie, The Two Towers, no, it was the first movie too, when the gigantic cave troll stabbed him too.

Do you remember? Ooh, the Slytherin. Are you fucking around with me right now? I'll be real. You don't watch any fantasy movies? I watch them. I watch them. I just don't make them the cornerstone of my existence.

Yeah, but you're not, that's not your favorite type of movie. No, no, what's your favorite type of movie Brad? I'd have to say thrillers or Martial arts movies. I just watched a horrible one the other day a martial arts or a thriller martial arts movie What was it called? It was the one not a Tony Ja, but he was trying to get an elephant back Does it un back? No the same guy that played on Bach, but he's trying to get an It's the worst way wait there's an actual elephant Yes, there's two somebody owned an elephant and they're like it's gone and now I have to get it back Yeah, like it was taken for elephants

So like Tony Ja is a guy and his elephant is an elephant too. he's not now. Okay. I think it's the protector, right? Yes Oh the protector this was the worst movie. He protects elephants. It was so bad Well, could you know? Yeah, yeah. Wow. It was so bad. It was that bad, huh? Yeah, it's streaming for free on Amazon Prime. How do you steal an elephant? I don't, like, they... With peanuts. There's a lot of plot holes in this movie. Don't they eat peanuts?

Yeah. Okay, yeah. A peanut train. Yeah. You see Bob doing... Yeah. And the squirrels keep stealing him, right? Stop it, stop, stop!

Yeah, so that's him doing, we have a photo of him right now doing exercising elephant crossfit That right there seems like you know the elephant doesn't like it. That's gonna be in Venice in a few years Yeah, but look at the elephant you think the elephant likes that? No I'm just trying to get to the river to get some fresh water And some guys doing exercises on his tusk. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Apparently those are very expensive. Mm. Yes. And you used to kill them for the tusk. I know, they still do. Ivory. Is that what it is? Yeah, Ivory. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You know much about Ivory? No, only that it goes well with ebony. God, that was a really crafty thing you just said. That's great. You remember the song, ebony andory? Yeah. Who's singing and saying that? Stevie Wonder? And who else? A white guy. Is that Michael Jackson? No, Ebony and Ivory. He can sing it by himself. Ebony and Ivory. Paul McCartney. Oh yeah. Stevie Wonder. Paul McCartney. I should have known that one. He's a Beatle for God's sakes. Exactly. You like the Beatles?

Yeah. Who's the oldest person you've ever seen in concert? Because I think Paul might be mine Ringo Starr you oh you saw Ringo yeah recently no When one time you my friend Craig Crawford we were in high school and Ringo Starr high school That was like 40 years ago for you. Oh, and there we go Here we are I K knew this was going to happen. I knew this moment was going to happen. I dreaded this moment. And now, alas, here it is. That's why we haven't had you on. Yeah, that's why I haven't had you on. Well, you've never done Tiger Belly?

I've never done Tiger Belly. This is the first time. Yeah. How is that possible? This was my birthday gift to myself. It's my birthday today. What? Wow.

Let's go eat. You see a dwarf on his birthday? You guys are all getting wishes. You caught me. How old are you today? 41, which is like 65 in dwarf. Wow. Really?

No, it's not. That just made me so sad. No, I'm good. Yeah, that's why I'm wearing a t-shirt that says, Daddy of the Birthday Girl, because it's also my daughter's birthday today. Whoa. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She was born on my birthday.

Yeah, I think we talked about the other day about Dwarf's longevity in the green room. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Did I bring that up? Yeah, we're fine. I said, how long do you guys live? It's not as long though. No, no, it's fine. It's good I don't know. Let's talk about it If you have my type of dwarfism, which is called achondroplasia then for the most part, it's fine You just stay like it's like it's like everything else stay stay. Yeah, how long did R2D2 live?

Look up Kenny Baker. Kenny Baker. I have to know. I have to know too. I have to know when. It will dictate how. 1934 to 2016, 81 years old. Look at that. Is that the cut you have? Yeah. Wow, what a celebration. Kenny Baker! Wow that's great! Wait no, no, I don't have, no he has a different type than mine. I have... How can you tell? Because you can tell. Oh like Asians can tell. Yeah! Oh is that one of the, yeah we should start playing that game. I think he has... What kind of dwarfism? I believe Kenny Baker has something called pseudo contraplasia Which is a fucked up name for a type of dwarfism because pseudo means false Yeah, contraplasia, which is like I have a I have a contraplasia. It's a fucked up name for

Is there any way to Google what dwarves die faster? I? Can tell you that's probably a different frame it primordial Primordial dwarves usually don't live that long really yeah interesting. Yeah, yeah, they're they're they're very tiny Yeah, oh, so yeah, let's not talk about I don't know why we keep going back I do it Ringo star Ringo star Ringo star oldest concert you've ever seen oh, yeah, that's right I said ring got and then we made an order years ago 40 years ago, and then. Oh, yeah, that's right. I said ring Yeah, okay when Ringo is third was 39 and that was the old I'm only like 12 years older than you I know but Insane that you would even say something like that

anyway Because you're what 52? Yeah, whatever. I don't even know if I'll get there. You will. I hope so. It'll be a... No, here's the thing about... I don't fear death. I'm just sad that I'm not gonna be able to look at Twitter the day after I die. Because I feel like the jokes will be really good. Oh, I see. Yeah. Or know your impact.

And I don't care about the impact. I just want the jokes. Because the jokes are going to be like, oh, and here's his coffin, and they're going to show a picture of a shoe box. You know, like, it's going to be stuff like that. I know, but they already did that with Verne Troyer. That's true. But like, one of them was like, he killed himself, he jumped off the kitchen table or whatever.

And you read a bunch of the hosts, right, and you're like, what? The thing about also being a little person is no matter how I those, right? And you're like, what? The thing about also being a little person is no matter how I die, it will be funny. Like you can make... I can come up with some things that wouldn't be funny. Like what? The way you did. I mean, your death. Yeah. Let me see if there's a death. What part of my death would not be funny? Would not be funny. OK, you're at the eulogy. Brad's dead. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

He's a ghost watching. He's going to be the judge of your jokes. Go ahead. No, I'm not saying it's a joke. I'm just saying that there's got to be an event that happened where people are going to be a difficult time to like, OK, you were eaten by a shark. No, that'd be pretty funny

That'd be really Yeah, I want to giggle just they would show gifts of People throwing chum in the water be like here. They are throwing Brad's that's true. That's true. The shark. Yeah. Yeah, that's come on That's really funny to be like how big's the shark and they're so gold How do you feel about like those videos were like some guys like standing, you right, and well they'll show like a dwarf like throwing a, you know what I mean, javelin or whatever. Oh. And it cuts to a guy with toothpicks coming in. Oh yeah. Those kind of, what do you think? Those are funny. No, they make me mad. They're simple but they're funny. Oh they are? They make you mad? Okay. I think they're funny. I know the types where it's like it it shows a dwarf at a gym working out with the ropes,

like doing the ropes, and then it cuts to a guy's shoelaces going up and down. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, those ones. That's pretty funny. You like those? Yeah. Okay.

I made one. Oh, you weren't in one? Yeah, it didn't go as viral. What was yours? It was my opening act. JB Ball was coming out of a shower and he was nude and I was like, ah, put on a towel and I threw him a big towel and the camera cut and it was this like little hand towel that he caught. And then... Oh, that's fun.

Yeah. And it wasn't big enough to cover his massive dick. Okay. Well, let's like cut that out. Why? Very uncomfortable. He's hung. We're going to Penis again. JP Ball is the very hung comedian. We're talking about Penis and dwarves again. We're not talking about those two things. Very funny, very hung comedian. You know what I find, and see if you can agree with this.

Okay. And I kind of have the same thing you have, not dwarfism, but like I have this thing where it's a little easier on stage for us, especially if we're unknown, when you walk out there, it's almost as if they kind of already like you. So when you go up on stage, you could just, even back when you weren't a name, people were like, oh, you know what I mean? There was a feeling of a trust or something.

I had it too, where- The audience was rooting for us. Rooting for us. Yeah. Now, how do you feel about that? About the audience rooting for me? Great. I'll take it.

This is a really hard business. If I can have any advantage whatsoever. Now, it's like all stand-up comedy where, and this is the same for you as it was for me, you could walk out and be the adorable teddy bear Asian that you are, and then the audience will root for you. But then that lasts only for a minute or two, and then you have to actually have jokes. Like it's the same thing for me where it's like,

I've watched, I won't say the name, but I've watched a little person comedian bomb, and it is- Where? No, if I say the name, he'll know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You can bleep it if you want it It was somewhere at a comedy club in Well, that don't be specific Just do this I'm gonna say something okay, okay?

Well bleep it just here's what you do when you cut in a situation like that like that You make up a name you make them a name make up a completely different city Oh, and also make up a different year. Oh, okay. Right, so let's, with those rules, I want you to... Oh, you know what? I could say one because the Comic Club doesn't even exist anymore.

No, no, do the game I'm playing now. All right, use this technology. I just set up a game, dude, just do the game, dude. Pepperbite. All right, so I'm gonna go back to where we're like, yes, do you guys bomb? Yeah, I've seen a dwarf comedian bomb. What's his name?

No, no, you make it up. You have to cover your mouth now because we're making it up. Why do we cover up? Why did we do that whole thing? Wait, why were you explaining the rules of your mouth? We like, he'll take me more serious if I'm a ninja. Is that why you did that? Why'd you do this? It's a secret.

What's so laugh? Why are you laughing so hard? So just now, just feel the rules. You know the rules? Now I'm picturing Bobby as an NFL football coach, calling plays, but he's trying not to get his lips red where he's like, I write tight 37 all on the wing, go. Yeah, yeah, so here we go. So you know the rules. I have it so I'm to do a small community situation

There was I did a comedy club in Fairfield, California Called pepper bellies it is fun It is since shut down. Yeah Pepper belly sounds like something you order off a Japanese menu. Yeah. But it's not. Hey, hey, hey, don't make the, don't make the, don't make the little jokes in between because it's just. Pepper belly?

It takes, no, it just takes away from the story. Oh, okay. So just tell the story. Start over, start over with something. Oh, so, oh, this is how we talk to each other. Just, just start without. Just start, no, you don't get involved. You stay put.

What are you going to, what are you going to say? say if you cover your mouth that's when you tell the real story No, no, no, no, no, no, no, I want to make believe one. So just make believe ready and it's a one I'm not gonna make it Never said to a bum. Oh, can you tell me a story? Yeah. Oh, I've seen a dwarf bomb. Oh, tell me pixie There's a dwarf comic named pixie. Okay good over at the Tempe chuckle hut. I Love that room. It's a great room weird green room. It's a good it's a little weird Yeah, the green room because it's like mark made out of marshmallows. Yeah, it's very strange

Yeah, there's a door and a hot days dude, but get sticky Yeah, it's very strange. Yeah, there's door and a hot days dude get sticky But there's a dwarf comedian named pixie pixie and her tell me about pixie and her whole bit was a woman Yeah, okay. She would have someone toss her on stage Because the stage was too high and then there and then pixie bombed. Yeah, after that she was tossed on stage Yeah, cuz the guy threw her too hard. Oh Knocked him knock. out a little bit. Does that really have to happen? What part is real now?

What part is real? I mean, that one? I feel like we're- What part is real? Did that really happen? I'm in a Christopher Nolan sketch right now. Did that really happen? No.

You told me to make it up. No, but I want the real story. But you know what I mean? You changed the- But know what I mean? The details are on it. The real story is that I gave a Dwarf comic a guest spot. Oh, there we go. At the Tempe Chuckle Pot. At the Tempe Chuckle Pot.

And then you gave Pixie the thing. Pixie. And then what happened? And then Pixie proceeded to do jokes for my second album. No. What? And then in front of me. Okay, wait, wait.

So let's back up for a second. This is a true story. I know it is. Can we just back up for a second? Sure. Had you not seen Pixie perform before, then why would you do that? Because... It's some random Korean guy that's at a club. I'm like, you want to go out? Why would you do that? Because it's just some Korean random Korean guy that's at a club

I'm like you want to go out like why would you do that? I've done is he's dwarf Yeah, I've done it multiple times because I think I I think dwarf comics don't get enough. Oh, that's not a spotlight So I try to help them out there. There's a guy in Houston named Clinton shorter That's his real name. His last name is shorter and he's a dwarf God's hilarious. I Mean the parents were assholes the parents aren't dwarves so he their last name is shorter I knew a guy named Tom Chinkeer which is interesting great yeah yeah yeah glad you made and yeah he was uh yeah Tom Cheney! Tom Cheney was like, really Asian. I just don't know.

There he is! Alright, Clinton Shorter. Clinton Shorter! That's insane. And he was in the audience of one of my shows and I saw him and I like made some dwarf jokes to him and he fired back. Yeah, that's him. That's pretty handsome for a...

That was the show! So he's in the audience of one of my shows. Yeah. And this is kind of full circle because this is also kind of how Minsea discovered me. Yeah, but this is getting confusing. So it's like... This is the real story, by the way. Yeah, I know, I know, but we're moving on from the Pixie story. Okay, maybe. Are we moving on from the Pixie story? I could go back to it. I want to go back to the Pixie and then we'll go to this guy. Okay. Okay. All right pixie Said can I have a guest spot and I said no problem and then she went up and proceeded to do jokes

From my second album called hi-ho and the audience knew no they didn't know. Yeah, I knew yeah And cuz so it's a pixie killed no bombed with your material That's a bigger shame. Yes. I'm like, I've gotten standing o's with this shit. Wow. Wow. And she's bombing. And now you're watching her from the back. Yeah. Now do you have the, do you know in your mind? Cause what, this is what I would do. Yeah. I would like not bring it up and just never have that person. What's going on there?

Things are falling. Yeah, but what happened? Who did that? My phone fell. They're fired. Interesting, dude. He did not get down. It's really cool to see Dustin.

E.J., what are you doing? I'm just embarrassed. He's embarrassed. He's embarrassed. Wait, he just described the whole nerd-dom that he was okay with, but now this is embarrassing him. Coming on saying like, well actually, the rock-thor doesn't have the strength of a thorn

with the Middeth metal that we talked about. Who said that? He did. Oh, okay. I don't remember. A minthorol. Minthorol, that's what I was going for. Anyway, so the...

You're attracted. Pixie comes off stage, and I go up to Pixie and I go... Because before I gave Pixie the guest spot, Pixie told me that they were a really big fan. And when Pixie came off stage, I was like, big fan, huh? And then what did Pixie say? Yeah. And you never confronted this woman woman Oh, I did. I said yeah, cuz I could tell cuz most of those jokes were mine off my second album

And what'd she say? She said no What it was like? Now don't get me wrong. I am fully aware that as dwarf comedians We're gonna hit on some of the same topics. What are some of the topics? Fully aware. Yes, we're- You guess. We're elves- Gilbert, fucking guess!

I don't know philosophy. I'm not gonna assume. What do you think, dude? Maybe it's about the economy. I don't know. How long their legs are? Yes. There are certain things that we will talk about.

No problem. Okay. And that's totally fine. But when you tell a specific story about me on an airplane getting thrown off the airplane, which happened when I flew to, when I was flying to Salt Lake City, yeah, then I'm like, well, that's just the story

that happened to me. So yeah. Oh, so you were in a different city, but this could have happened though. Somebody could have been like, oh I got some jokes I'll write for you, and they just listened to your album, and then they gave him,

now let's go back to this guy now. Yeah, Clint Shorter. Shortier. Great guy. Yeah, yeah. And so I'm on stage. And you didn't know Shorter at all? No, I didn't see him at the meetings.

So I'm up there and I see him in the audience and I started cracking some jokes to him and he was zipping him right back at me. And I was like, what the hell? And I was like, what do you do for a living? And he goes, I'm a comedian. And I stopped and I went, all right. And I go, what's the biggest crowd you've ever performed for? He goes, like about 15 people. And I go, well, tonight you're gonna do 400.

And the people went crazy. Yeah, and I go, get up on stage. And he goes up on stage at the Houston Improv. And he does about seven minutes. I love that room. And yeah, it's great room. And he crushes, crushes. Of course.

For seven minutes. Of course. And then literally after the show, the management from Houston Improv came up to him and they're like, hey, we want to start booking you on some shows and shit. And they got his number and he's doing great. And I loved it. And you did that. No, I mean, he did that, but I gave him the opportunity. You did that. Yeah. You know what? Love this guy. You're his Peter Dinklage. Did you know that? You're his Peter Dinklage.

So that's really good. Wait, so he hates me? No. For the record, internet, I don't hate Peter Dinklage. I'm just jealous. You don't have to explore the joke even further. Anyway. But no, I was happy that he got that opportunity

Even more happy that he succeeded and that's great. Hope there's more dwarf comics that succeed Well, I think that um Like do you do you want other Asian comics to succeed my god? They all do succeed. We're talking about There's nothing I can do about it. He's trying to stop it. Yeah, yeah. I'm just trying to, you know what I mean? Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. Of course I do. Price picks! It's playoff time. It is now or never. Don't miss out on the last few weeks of football action with PricePix, the best place to win cash while watching the playoffs. You can now win up to a thousand times your money on PricePix.

PricePix is the best way to get action on sports in more than 30 states including California, Texas, Georgia and Florida. PricePix is the best place to get real money sports action. Join over 10 million members and sign up today. Prize Fix now offers MasterCard for quick and easy deposits into your account this sports season. Just guys, once again, sign up today and get $50 instantly when you play $5.

You don't even need to win to receive the $50 bonus. It's guaranteed. Make sure you do this. Hey Bobby, do you think Lamar Jackson will get more than 250 passing yards this week? Oh yeah. Will Patrick Mahomes pass more than 1.5 touchdowns? Nope.

All right, cook up hot takes with your friends and win real money this football season when you and your crew run your game on prize picks. Download the app today and use code belly to get $50 instantly after you play your first $5 lineup. That's download the app today and use code belly to get $50 instantly after you play your first $5 lineup That's download the app today and use code belly to get $50 instantly after you play your first $5 lineup price picks run your game You guys Shopify is how we run our business, you know, if you have an online business, you don't do Shopify You're already losing. Yep, and you have an online business, you don't do Shopify, you're already losing. Yep.

And you want to be winning. Uh-huh. Get your store up and running easily with thousands of customizable templates. No coding or design skills required. All you need to do is drag and drop, man. Their powerful social media tools lets you connect all your channels

and create shoppable posts and help you sell everywhere people scroll. Shopify makes it easy to manage your growing business. They'll help you with the details like shipping, taxes, and payments from one single dashboard allowing you to focus on the important stuff like growing your business. What happens if you don't act now? I don't know. Will you regret it?

I think so. What if someone beats you to the idea? That's not a good thing. Don't kick yourself and you hear this again in a year because you didn't do anything now. I'm kicking myself now. With Shopify, your first sale is closer than you think. Wow.

Established in 2025 has a nice ring to it, doesn't it? Sign up for your $1 per month trial period at Shopify.com slash Tiger Belly, all lower case. Go to Shopify.com slash Tiger Belly to start selling with Shopify today. Shopify.com slash Tiger Belly all lowercase go to Shopify.com slash Tiger Belly to start selling with Shopify today Shopify.com slash Tiger Belly I met my wife on an app When I was doing work in San Francisco The app is called field. I know field. Yeah that it's for like it's more for like sexual like sexual like

What you call it on fetishes and stuff? It's for like niche it like niche. Yeah alternative stuff. It like I was told Do you want the full do you want the full story? Well, I got the full one. I'm here full stories fun Full story, so I I had to move to San Francisco to do a morning radio show. I was tired, I was burnt out from the road, and I got offered a morning radio show in San Francisco, and I was like.

Let me ask some questions. Is it before the Las Vegas thing? Yes. Way before. Yeah. This is after Mencia? Yes. Okay, continue.

Okay, going through the Brad timeline. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah Yeah, and I went to San Francisco and it was on a morning radio show and I didn't know anyone in the city So one of the bits we played On the show is a game called tinder or grinder where I would flip a coin every day and based on what the coin landed On I would have to go and either a tinder date or a grinder date to meet people Yeah, and I and I did go on one Grindr date. Was it with a guy? Yeah.

What was that like? It was awesome. Really? Yeah, he paid for everything. I know, but did you, was he? I let him know that, hey, like we matched, and I'm like, hey, I'm not gay, this is a radio bit. And he's like, no, well, we're still gonna go out.

And I was like, well, okay. Wow, where did he take you? Yield Ship saloon, which is on battery street. Did you get drunk? Of course I had to. Okay. Are you guys taping it too? Is it, is they taping it? No. Okay. We, we, we just went and we, and there was a game on and he was like really into sports. So we watched sports. Cool. Cool. We ate wings. We drank beer. That's great. And he paid for the whole thing. Yeah. We ate wings, we drank beer. That's great. And he paid for the whole thing. Yeah, he told me how hot I was. It's like seriously the best first date ever.

Wait, what? He said that you were hot? Yeah. Okay, good. You don't believe him? I believe it. I believe it. Of course I do. Nine years ago. I was hotter back then.

No, you were hot. Tell me about the Tinder. Then what happened? Tinder? You went to Tinder? Then we're doing the radio bit again and someone calls in and goes Brad should get on an app. So Field at the time was called Thrinder. So he goes, hey, you should get on Thrinder. And I go, what's that? And they go, that's Tinder for threesomes. Wow. And that's how it was sold to me. And I was like, okay, so let me try that. And I got on the app and I matched with two women and we were all gonna go out

and then one of the women didn't show up on the date and the other woman did and the other woman, is your wife, is my wife. Yeah, but the two women, had they hooked up before? No. Wow. So it was just three. So it was you and your wife

and then what'd you guys do that first night? We went out to this coffee shop, which is right by where she lived, and we went on the date with the expectation of, hey, we're just going to meet, make sure we're not psychotic, and then go bang. That's going to be what the date's going to be. And that didn't happen because it was literally 15 minutes into the day. We're like shit I like you. Oh my god, and do you guys fuck that night? No How long when did that happen third date?

Amazing. Yeah second day. We're just like we're still trying to make sure the first date wasn't just a fluke Yeah, and the third day we went out to this tiki bar where? Yeah, it was that was a good night. And then I was doing morning radio, so when we went back to her place, I didn't sleep that night, because I had to be up for morning radio. That next show, I must have been horrible, because I had no sleep.

I was wearing the clothes from the day before. My coworkers recognized it. They're like, why are you in the same clothes? Is it laundry day or whatever? And I went, no, I had a date last night. So somewhere out there is a recording of me talking about the first date with the woman that would eventually become my wife.

Wow. And then, did you guys like hang out with each other every day ever since then or no? Like not every day, but a lot. A lot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then when you, when did that radio job end? I lasted about three months. Why? And then when you, when did that radio job end?

I lasted about three months. And then I couldn't do it. Why? I can't wake up at 3.30 in the morning. Oh yeah, it must be so hard. That and I missed stand up because I couldn't do stand up. Even though San Francisco is such a great stand up city. It is, yeah. Clubs like the punchline, cars.

Too tired, too tired. Yeah, I was done. So like, I just quit. And then you moved back to LA? Yeah, and then she moved with me. At that same time she moved with you? A couple months after that. Wow. Amazing. Yeah, so that's how we met. What a beautiful thing. And now we have a kid and she turns five years old today. I've never met your kid before. There's a reason for that. So fast. So quick.

Extremely fast. Not just fast, rude. Okay. I don't want to meet her either. I honestly don't want to meet her now ever. In fact, there's a war now. Yeah, yeah, there's a war between me and your baby. Not me. Okay, is that your baby?

Oh, so you don't put her online or anything like that? No, I don't put her face on the internet. Well, because I used to, but then we had an incident. Oh, okay. Let's not... It's fine to talk about it. I don't want to talk about it. No. Okay. I forget, your daughter has dwarfism as well? Yes. Okay. Yes. So she is... You're going to have another one after? Yes. Okay, yeah, so she is. Are you gonna have another one after? No. Just one?

Yeah, just one. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, because we found out that we're kid people, we love kids, we're not baby people. Babies are hard, man. I bet, yeah, they're very difficult, especially when, I mean, my job is what it is where I have to leave, that leaves my poor wife at home

and she's gotta like hold it down and she does does she's amazing at it yeah but yeah that's tough. Can I ask you some more personal questions um. Fire away dude. Did your parents or your parents were they dwarves as well? Yeah. Is there anywhere in your family history? I looked no. None. You're the beginning. Yes I'm Neo. I'm the one. Wow. It was really confusing for my dad because my dad's like there's no dwarves in my family. There's no dwarves in You my my mom's family. She's like my dad's like what the heck happened here? Did you have a good upbringing though with your parents? Great upbringing. Oh that I bet love my parents and yeah That's so great. Yeah. Yeah, we we were the we were the Beaver Cleaver family. We were like mom, dad, sister, brother, dog, and I'm the weirdest part about the family.

Well, so your brother and your sister, obviously, they don't have dwarfism. No. Okay, so what was that like growing up though in the house? I mean, was it, were they, never, I mean. So here's the thing. My, well, technically I didn't really grow Bobby, but then you bring that up. No, you did. I'm tired of these little jokes. Yeah. You did grow. Not a lot, but you did. No, it was great. Um, my dad was really intelligent in terms of how he raised me, where he wasn't in denial of my dwarfism, or he wasn't overprotective. He knew that I'd be bullied as a kid. So what he would do is he would sit with me

and write comebacks with me. So then when I went to school and kids made fun of me, I would make fun of them back and they'd be like, oh shit. And then- That's how you did it. Yeah, and then- Oh, I love that.

Then kids would be friends with me because they're like, oh, he just made fun of the bully. That was awesome. So yeah, my childhood was great. I got no complaints. But now we live in a different era, so I don't think your daughter is going to experience the same things you did.

Yeah, I don't think so. And so far so good. Like, she goes to school. The kids are meaner to me than they are to her, which fine. How? How are kids bullying you? Because I drop her off. First time I dropped her off, there was a kid that just looked up and he saw me goes, you're not a real dad. I was like, so I will punch that kid. I will pump up my foot to this kid's chest. Such a good one. I had no comebacks for that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's a, that was so hurtful.

All the comebacks my dad and I wrote, all my time as a comedian, nothing prepared me for a five year old walking up to me and going, you're not real dad. It's like fuck you. Was he taller than you? About the same size. Yeah, wow, that's so funny. It's an even fight. If I was to shave my mustache and beard, I could fight him.

Yeah, and then what was your response? Were you just kind of like laughing or? I did the more like, so there's this like kind of speech I go into with kids to kind of help them understand like okay okay let's I want to hear the speech so I'm okay you want to say the thing all right I really want to do that I'm salivating you're not a real dad. You would laugh like that? Can we take it back one more time?

Light was off. Thank you. Director. Oh, light was off. This guy is like... Brad, we gotta just stay in the scene. That's not Peter Dinklage? Oh no, this is Brad Williams.

Sorry. Oh shit. Lion face. Lemon face. Ready? Lion face. And action. You're not a real dad. You son of a bitch. That's a speech? Yeah, that's how it starts. Okay. You son of a bitch.

Excuse me? You heard me. I did. Your mom's a whore. That's the only reason why you're here. I bet you don't even know who your real dad is. Because your mom's a whore. That's the only reason why you're here. I bet you don't even know who your real dad is. Because your mom's a whore. A filthy, filthy Korean whore. Whoa. That's in the speech.

I say Korean every time. Wow, which is an odd little, that's a big add in there for a white kid. You know what I mean? So you do the speech. That's all it is? You're a whore? Your mom's a whore?

Uh-oh. Your mom, over. Over, your mom's a whore, Your mom's a whore? Your mom! Over! I follow him through the school. Just remind him. Alright, we're going to play Duck Duck Goose. How about Duck Duck, your mom's still a whore. Good speech. I tell the kids, like, hey, you see how that kid over there has brown hair, when I was

blonde hair, girls, boys. There's some people that are really tall and some people are really small. I just happen to be really small. And normally when I say that speech, kids go, okay. And then they move on. Has there been one kid that was like, nah, fuck that. Oh, there's a kid. The Bobby Lee kid.

Nah, fuck all that shit. There was a kid, so for my daughter's birthday, I took her to Legoland yesterday. Yesterday? Yeah. Wow. And there was one kid, okay. Okay, I want to hear this kid. So we're in line for this ride, it's like a boat thing, you hop in the boat, you drive

it, it's fine. It's fun. And the kid starts looking at me, and he has two brothers and his dad with him, and they're all in line too. And he starts kinda being like, are you a man or a boy? And just like- His dad's not saying anything? His dad's like, hey, hey son, that's not, you know, he's-

Oh, he's doing one of those? He's nervous as hell. He's like, oh my God. The dad is not, you know, he's, he's nervous as hell. He's like, oh my God. He's scared out of his mind. He's like, there's going to be camera phones. It's going to be horrible. Oh, the, all right. Yeah. So, but I give the speech to the kid and he's fine.

He's good. Later. And now what's your daughter doing, during this? She's just playing. She's just, she's not even listening. Okay. Yeah. She's in her own world. She's great. And then later, having this moment with my daughter, we're still in line, and we like to give each other high fives, and she goes like, Daddy, high five! And I go, yeah! Boom! And I do high five.

And then the kid from behind us goes, well, it's not really a high five if you do it. Damn! It's a low five. Is that what he said? Yeah. That's what he's saying. Thanks for explaining the joke, Bobby. Just in case you missed it at home. Wait, wait. So that was a joke that you were saying. That didn't really happen.

No, that really happened. It's not a high five when you do it? The kid behind us said it's not really a high five when you do it. Oh my god. So I turned to the kid, and the dad's just like horrified horrified. Yeah. Yeah, and I turn and I turn the kid I go Yeah, you're right. It's kind of it's kind of like if I looked at you went hey smart five I see what did the dad do the dad just kind of looked at me went yep He kind of just nodded with like, I'll take that one.

Two, all right, for the record, the rest of the time in the line, the kids were... This dad was going through it, man. I felt for this dad. Yeah. He had three boys and they were just like... The boats don't have real engines in them. Like, they were just like being those asshole kids the whole time and like like Legoland isn't even fun and this dad's like I Know how much the tickets are this dad's like out like a couple hundred bucks for take these three Monsters the way I don't have kids. Yeah, I'll have one of those. Yeah, don't yeah Here's a shame about the whole thing though. Yeah, the shame about the whole thing is is that these kids

Don't know like you have such a specific skill set of talent. You know what I mean? And what you do is so brave and I just wish I could just like was near you and just had like an iPad and go look at how many people went to a show. I mean look at his skill set. Like he's, you know what I mean? He's so special. It's kind of like when those guys get into bar fights and then the guy they fight happens to be like a UFC champion. It's like, oh, you're eight and you just went up against me. A stand-up comic who we have this skill set.

So yeah, and there is a part of me that, of course, I wish I could do that as well, but then I'd be a guy going, you don't understand how important I am to a fucking eight-year-old. Yeah, you can't. I thought, that's why I need you to do it. But does Peter Dinklage get, I mean, is he famous enough where he doesn't get that as much,

you think? Oh, he's gotta get it. He still has gotta get it. It never leaves. It never leaves. Never leaves. Wow, what a shame, shame. So it's like. That sucks. So it's hard to really like some people have asked like oh do you have like a have you changed with your success? Do you think you have a big ego? Whatever. I go well it's kind

of hard to have a big ego where literally like almost every time I drop off a kid to school there's a kid that just goes what's up with him? And that's still every time every day? Not every day the kids are getting better some of the kids and this this terrifies me Bobby some of the kids know who I am and they're like in third grade and I'm like how the fuck do you know who I am? Oh they know they have the internet yeah they're big yeah yeah yeah I mean no I'm just saying when we when Andrew and I or even when I go on the road There's like 12 year old 14 year old kids in the audience

I mean, they just isn't that terrifying though? No, because our parents are huge fans, you know Yeah, but um, you know, I mean there when I was 12 I was waiting. I was watching crazy shit Mm-hmm. You know man, like, you know, like I would you ever go back and watch like a PG movie in the 80s and go Oh, that's a PG-13 are nowadays yeah yeah yeah yeah like there's some movies back in the day we were like huh and there's the obvious ones like big you have like an adult woman is essentially wanting to have sex with an eight-year-old right that's crazy like I never thought about that yeah there's that going on in that movie and then there but there's like a bunch of others where

Like you watch it again you go. Oh Wow, yeah I'm I think I'm growing up in a time or my daughter's growing up in a time where she's gonna get a little less than me I'm hoping so far all the kids in her class love her. It's yeah, she has friends. It's so cool Like I'm so I'm so thankful. Cause I was like nervous, you know, as most parents would be that she'd go to school and all the kids would look at my kid and be like,

oh, she's weird looking. And then like not wanna be friends with her, but everyone wants to be friends with her. And I'm just like, oh yes, did it. Yeah, I've told this story before, but I one time worked with a dwarf. And he was like, Ben. We worked on a movie together.

It never came out. What movie did we do? Something about penguins. You guys did a penguin movie? Oh, that's right. Yeah. What happened to that? I don't know.

There was some penguins. I shot it twice. Yeah. Wait, what was it about? So, I'm not gonna believe this. You're right, I vaguely, I remember now. So they did a movie, something penguins, but there was dwarves in it.

Were you one of the dwarves? I was one of the little people. That was actually when I first met you. Yeah, and then what happened was I shot it, and then like six months later, I'm at the comedy store, and these guys, the director came to the store, and he goes, hey, can we talk?

I go, yeah, what's up, man? And he goes, you know the earthquake? That just happened, I go, yeah, yeah, yeah. He goes, you're not gonna believe it, but you know what I mean, the editing facility was right where the earthquake went off. And I go, okay, and he's like, we lost everything. I go, the whole movie, the whole movie. Oh my Oh, so I had to reshoot the show.

It was a pilot. Yeah, at some point you were like hugging a penguin doll. That's right, that's what I remember that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was crazy. Really weird thing. And that was like in the time where I was like, this is before podcasting and stuff. This is like the bottom of. After Mad. After Mad, before Pod, when it was dwindling down to nothing and I had to take anything that the people gave me. So I didn't realize that you were in that. I'm proud of you, Bobby.

I really am because you did not realize I was in that. Most people would just assume I was in that because there were dwarves. Was there a lot of dwarves? Yeah, there was like, I don't want to say seven, but... Yeah, yeah, yeah. I remember that. Wow. I wonder what ever happened to that project. I don't even remember the name of it. I don't remember. What's a project that you're like, I can't believe I'm in that? Like... Oh, I have so many.

Either in a good way or a bad way Well, I made them cut me out of the underground comedy movie So there's this guy Vince offer he sold Scrunchies or something on the internet Like late night what was no he had a product that he would always on MTV he would Look up Vince Offer. Vince Offer, okay. And so I was in the, yeah, Vince Offer, that guy.

But don't IMDB him, go to his regular. Oh, this is the movie by the way. That's the movie, yeah. But go to what he was known for, so get out of that and go to just Google Vince Offer. Michael Clarke Duncan is in this movie. Oh yeah. Stack film. Why'd you want to get cut?

He looks like the ShamWow guy. That is him. Oh it is? That's ShamWow. That's what I was thinking of. ShamWow. Dude. Yeah, yeah. So what happened was I was an open micer in La Jolla in Vince Offer.

This is when ShamWow was a big thing. And I'm like, Oh my God, the Shamow guy. And then he goes, Hey man, I'm doing this movie. And I'm like, I had no agent or manager. I go, and he goes, I want you to win it. So I did it. It was called the underground comedy movie. And I played the most stereotypical Asian guy in it. It wasn't in my voice. they dubbed in my voice. It was karate or something. You couldn't do an Asian enough accent? No, the joke was them dubbing it.

Oh. And I did a lot of karate. Look at Bobby Lee as Chinese man. Oh my God. Yeah, Chinese man. That's how bad it was. Bobby Lee as Chinese man. And I remember,

I drove up to LA to shoot it and I was like, oh my God, this is like, this is how movies are made, huh? Joey Budafuco is in this movie. It was crazy. And then when... Now for the audio only audience, on the cover of this movie. There's two women That are just look like they're having the biggest bowel movements ever just sit. Yeah, it's a shit movie Yeah, well see if you can find my scene in on YouTube Can you and it says unrated cuz it cuz this was back before we had porn just a bit just available on our phones 24-7 yeah, so to sell movies be like, this is the unrated version. There might be a titty.

And we would buy a movie, because it'd be like, I'm 14, I don't give a shit. I'll just buy anything that has a tit in it. Male, female, male, I don't give a fuck. They released it on DVD, and then they called me, and then they go, and I go, I had to sign something,

and I didn't sign it, so they took me out of the thing But it was just like it was like I mean I've done many of those types of movie I mean you don't any shitty things. Oh, uh, I want to call it shitty because there's actually some fans of it, but A random one was a movie. I did called Hercules Saves Christmas And you and you would think Hercules right? Yeah. The Greek

hero? Nope. Hercules is the name of a pit bull. Really? Yep. It was a pit bull movie? Yeah it was a pit bull movie. What'd you play in it? An elf. It yeah Hercules saves Christmas. There I am on the cover. That post. Wait. That's you? Yeah. No no in the front. No in the middle one. Not, no, in the front. No, in the middle one. Not the dog licking the lady. Or the one about... Well, who's the lady? I don't know that. Yeah. Marissa Tomei? No. That's you right there. That's me. Wow. No beard. Yeah. How much you get paid for that? Not enough. And Urquely Saves Christmas. enough. Hercules Saves Christmas. It was produced by Shorty Rossi, who if you remember a TV show called Pit Boss, it was about a dwarf and two of the little people that saved pitbulls

that was on Animal Planet. They made a movie. Hercules is the name of his pitbull and yeah, he saved Christmas apparently. Wow. And what sucks about these kind of movies, you know by being at the Comedy Store, is they go there, these people that are making these movies, and they always corner you. Yep. Hey man, you know what I mean?

I got this so and so attached, you know what I mean? Oh boy. Is this it? Here's Bobby Lee's character in the underground. You're so skinny. Oh my God. You have a V cut Yo, you uh? Damn, I was talking. I was 23 years old there. Dude. You're like jacked kind of know look at your arm

It's yo, these are classic moves And and and look you backhand that I look so good. There was it sketches in there sketches. Yeah. Yeah, they're just sketches You're you fucking a woman right now. I know. You look great. Yeah. Hollywood. This is so embarrassing.

I haven't seen this in years. And now the woman was like, thank you for letting me face fuck you. Is this rated R, like she gets nude? I don't remember. You don't remember? Oh, fuck. Bobbie Lee just ripped off her dress but yeah it ended up not ripping and then she goes like...

You're just in a porn. It's like a porn. Now she's naked. There's some titties. Wow. Wow. And then the ShamWow guy. The ShamWow guy did this. Is one of your first. Yeah. I don't know who I feel more sorry for her or you. How did you find this? I don't know who I feel more sorry for her or you. How did you find this? I don't want to. You just dropped it. You're so like ripped. I know.

What the? Now you're fighting. Were you working out during this time? No, I was just no food. Yeah, he was poor. I had no money then. That's poor bod. Yeah.

For the dad bod, that's poor bod. Hopefully that's it, right? That's the whole thing. That's the whole thing. So you're just making Asian noises. yeah the whole thing oh so when they were releasing that for the DVD I go I cannot be in this because I had already been doing I like doing things oh like real legitimate things I was like I don't want that you know that was that before mad TV then that was not even just this

is the first week I did stand up i ran into this guy in san diego in 1995 i didn't know how any first yeah your first project but now that's when it came out i did it in like 95 oh damn you know what i mean and then four years later it came out and because in 99 is when i started getting like the tonight show and this and that and that's when i was like I don't want to be a part of it. Yeah, you know I mean, yeah But yeah, because sometimes that happens like bad movies get made and then they get scrapped But then one of the stars like blows up. They're like, oh shit

It was Michael Duncan and release this it was Michael Clark Duncan that started blowing up and that's how they got Like financing to get it out, you know But you know what I love about that is whether it be you in this movie, me and Hercules saves Christmas, Michael Clark Duncan was in the movie with you, like this shows people like you don't just sign up and be like, Hey, I'd like to be in show business now. And then they go, Oh, you want to be in show business? Wonderful. Here's your role in movies and television. Here's the shit that you have to eat.

Yeah. And so I did a bunch of like weird shit like that. It's all the same. And it's also like, I mean, I did this one pilot audition downtown and it was like a cattle call. And I remember, and I was just moved up here from San Diego and the line was, I'm not even exaggerating, it was an eight hour line

where I had to sit, wait in line and they were just reading people and it was just one line. And I would go in, I would say a line and then I would leave and that was it. And they saw probably 3,000 people. And it was like, in my mind I was like, oh, I'm never gonna, how do you make it?

How the fuck do you make it? Like you've been, you've, I'm sure been on the same types of auditions that I have where, because you're a certain type, like you show up and you're like, oh, here's a hundred people that look like me. Yeah, exactly, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like a commercial, because I've been on the Dwarf ads,

the Dwarf commercial auditions where I show up, it's like a commercial because I've been on the dwarf ads, the dwarf commercial auditions where I show up to a bunch of little people and they go like okay, so the only time I had like so in the show entourage, there was like one scene where Johnny drama like flips out on on the casting directors. I had that moment in an audition because it was for I forget the commercial, but it's it called for a little person that's like, all right, must have good improv comedy skills, must have great comedic timing. I'm just like, holy shit, this is me. They're describing me. And then I go to the audition, there's like 30 little people there. Yeah. And we go inside and they're like, do you

know them all? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Or deeper voice. I love how I've been, I've been talking like this the whole time and Bobby immediately just talk like this. What if I just came on the yeah. So yeah. So Bobby so Bobby, you... Like your lo-fi's going on. Yeah, Bobby, you go to these auditions, right?

And there's all these other Asians, you're like, how much are you? That's different. That's insane. How much are you? That's completely different. How much are you? That is completely different.

Do you understand my stuff? No, what you're doing right now is... Come by. No, that's not... Ebi roll. No. No, because it's like, if I could do now a dwarf with a little voice and also an Asian accent.

I mean, so we could do that too. Let's move on. Very true. Point taken. Either way, I'm doing the audition and you go, they're like, all right, we're calling you in. And then they go, oh, and then they go, OK, stack these boxes. Take these boxes and take them here and then make a stack of them. And I go, OK, like in a funny way, they go, no, just stack the boxes. And I go, OK. So I think this is going to make me mad, I think. Yeah, so I start just stacking the boxes. And then they go, OK.

I go, what do you mean okay? And they're like, no, you're- That makes me so mad. I hate that. You're done, that's it. That makes me so mad. And I go, why do the auditions say, must have comedic timing and improv skills and all that? And they're like, well, because, I mean, it's just important to have those types of things.

And I just stopped and I went, I've been a stand-up comedian For ten years. I'm on the road. I'm doing shows. I know nothing but to be funny This is all I know yeah to be funny. So if you want a dwarf to be funny, it's me. Yeah, that's me That's what you said to them. Yeah, I said respect to all these other little people. Yeah. Yeah, they're not me Yeah, they're not gonna be as funny as I am. So if you want someone funny, hire me. If you don't, it's all bullshit. Hire whoever you want to hire.

They did not hire me. Peter Dinklage. Yeah. That makes me so mad. Yeah, that's what this business is. I mean, that's what this Vince Offer thing was, was, you know, we just need an Asian guy to do an Asiany thing, and he never saw me perform.

I was an open micer. He just saw me in the lobby at the comedy store. It was just based on me being Asian, which is just so annoying. And then that's what I love so much about these podcasts and what you guys are doing now, because now it now it's like oh you don't have to go in Audition and be like and do the stereotypical bullshit that just that just hurts your soul. Yeah, you're you You're the most successful you've ever been because you're off. Well, I mean no, I mean

Yeah, I agree with you. I know but it's like also I mean what happened was I don't know about you know Little people can I call you little people? Yeah, is that with you. I know, but it's like also, I mean, what happened was, I don't know about, you know, little people, can I call you little people? Is that what you say? Yeah, yeah. But younger people, you know what I mean, that are my type, put their foot down and says, we're not doing Asian accents.

Yeah. You know, and so now you can look at, you know, it wasn't me that did it because I was a part of that generation that had to do it. Like I talked to Getty Wananabe when he did Magnum PI, he did Long Nuk Dong. And you know, we were in Hawaii shooting and I was looking at him and I was like,

dude, I just thought you were like a legend because it's like, and he said, dude, that was the only audition that we all had in years. So whenever they did, you know, the audition for Long A Tung, everyone auditioned for that because that was the only thing available. You know what I mean?

And all these guys had such deep skill sets in terms of acting and this and that and probably training and all that, but that's the only thing that were offered to them. And then as generations go on, you have the young kids like Steven Yeun and John Cho and Ali Wong and all these people and it just, they changed it.

You know what I mean? Where they put their foot down. It's so great. It's great. Yeah, and then, yeah, cause I mean, that essentially is happening with the little people right now is we had that transition where it's like, I think we're in the middle of it.

Ultimately what Dinklage is doing in terms of taking all the dwarves out of Snow White probably is a good thing for little people. But right now, it just sucks because it's like, well, that's the only parts we got. But let's explore that. Why, though? I mean, if it's dwarves, why can't dwarves be in it?

What's his argument? It's that it's exploitive and that it's like, oh, so we're just playing little people and that's like we're just playing's like, oh, so we're just playing little people, and that's like, we're just playing, dwarves playing dwarves. But not just playing little people, Sleepy has his own, like, specific. What's my motivation?

You're sleepy, got it. I know what I'm saying, is they're all individual characters, right? What's the, Dusty, what's one of them? Dusty? Is there Dusty, is there Dusty? I don't know. Yeah, Grumpy, is there grumpy?

There's grumpy. Yes, well done. That's two. Let's zoom in, let me read them all. Okay. All right, so you have Bashful. Yeah. Yeah, so not every dwarf is gonna get Bashful.

Correct. Yeah, do Bashful. Do Bashful. Yeah, what is Bashful? Oh, is it your audition? Yeah, yeah, yeah, let's see. I'm casting Snow White okay and um good to see you Brad Williams we saw you at the Comedy Store a couple weeks ago

thank you we're like oh my god so um we decided you're just gonna read for everything oh wonderful yeah we just want to see what dwarf you could be can't wait can you do Sneezy for me? Patchou! Wow that was fantastic. That was very good. Thank you. Can you do sleepy please? I don't know. Joe earlier did a better sleepy. Bigger yawn. Anyway happy? Okay. Yeah no problem. I'll do happy. But there's bitterness in his eyes. Yeah. Sneaky? Sneaky? Sneaky is better. That's the Asian style. That's the Japanese. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Cause we're doing, we're casting for both. We're casting for the Asian. Oh, okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I can be sneaky. Yeah. So like, look, cause we have a slanty.

We have a Japanese version. We have a slanty. We have a chinky. Nippy. We have sneaky. We have nippy. You know what I mean? So we have for the audio for the audio audience The Asians are only making those jokes. No, Brad said a couple My head yeah. So anyway, can we do doc? We've got cast that Peter Dingle's is doing dog Yeah, we're giving him we offer them dog. Yeah, he's a leader. Yeah grumpy. What the fuck man? Really? I'm grumpy grumpy. Maybe you want me to be grumpy. Yeah, he's the leader. Yeah, um, Grumpy. What the fuck, man? Really? Grumpy, Grumpy.

You want me to be Grumpy? That's it. Grumpy, oh yeah, my first audition in four fucking years and it has to be for the little people. Okay, and you just gave the part to Dinklage? When does the audition for Grumpy start? That was it. You got the part.

Oh, all right. We just talked and... Yeah, let's have him move these two boxes. No, was that right? But although we just talked and... Yeah, let's have him move these two boxes. No, no, no. That's not what it is. But can he move boxes? What we decided is that we would like you to read the Japanese version. Yeah, you know what? Let's try Slanty for this.

Oh, boy. Let's try to do Slanty. We're going to go on live stream as well. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, goodbye, SNL. It's never gonna happen, here we go. That's great, so, and we're done. So what I'm saying is as though that why,

it's more offensive to have regular, how do you, what do you call, Average size. Average size people. Yeah, we call you reachers. Reachers, yeah. Because to me, it's like if they were casting a live-action Mulan, and then they put Asians in it.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, they put Tom Cruise as the last samurai. He last said, yeah. That's another thing. What is the last of every people in a movie is a white guy? Last of the Mohicans? White guy.

Last samurai, white guy. Last of the Mohicans? White guy. Last Samurai? White guy. Yeah, I mean. Similar, but the Great Wall. Sorry, Matt Damon. As the man that saves China. Yeah. Is that Pedro Pascal?

I think early on, yeah. Wow! Yeah, why is that? Why does the last guy, the savior, have to be a white guy? Okay, was the last Airbender white? Oh, I don't know. I'm not. Who's Asian? The last action hero? White guy. The last... No, but that last action hero could be a white guy. I'm just saying the

last samurai should be an Asian person. Yeah. The last Mohicum should be a native person. Yes. That's a different conversation. But I just think that... Now... What about the movie I read for the Time Bandits? The Time Bandits, yeah, yeah, yeah. There's a little person in that one. I don't think they cast, did they cast all little people? Look up the cat,

because the original Time Bandits was all dwarves, right? Oh, there's a remake? There's a remake. Oh. Those are some... Yeah, that was the old ones. Give me the remake. The Apple one, right?

The Apple Time Bandits, yeah. Oh, there's an Apple Time Bandit? Yeah. You didn't get the... Yeah, I auditioned. Oh, so that's... And I asked my agent, I go, is there going to be... They replaced us with Asians?

I think they did. Oh, they're just regular people. They're average size. We read the features So now so now I now I feel like a fucking worker it Like a coup dro is one of the yeah, that's them. That's yeah, those are the time. It's average dwarves. They're reachers Taika Waititi. Yeah, he did it. It's cool though. I could have been in a Taika Waititi thing. Yeah, no, I don't see any dwarves. There's a kid. Yeah, I think that's bullshit. It's a kid. Is it bullshit or not? Be honest. How do you feel about it? I think it's bullshit. The thing is is I don't mind if you don't do dwarves in Snow White as long as there's other

parts that we're able to play. Like, if you want us to audition and for things and just like, and but it's not a dwarf role, it's just like, hey, let's just find an actor. Let's just find a good person. Yeah. That's fine. But like, if there's other options, but there's just not all those options out there for little people to play. And if you say like, there's always no good dwarf stories Bullshit, I could tell you three off the top of my head Tell me a dwarf story. I will tell I will tell you a story when I happy one or a sad one

Tell me a sad oh boy. Okay, so this is a true story. This is true. Okay This is yeah true story. Yeah, yeah In the Holocaust This is true. Okay. This is a true story. Yeah. Yeah. Um, in the holocaust. Oh, I got already let's green light that I don't need to hear more. Tell me the story. Yeah, real story is there is a there was a family of little people that were Jewish that were I don't know if they were Jewish or not but they were captured by the Nazis and they were brought to one of the camps. I'm not sure which one and they were experimented on Right here. Yeah dwarfs of Auschwitz and they were

experimented on yeah, I the Nazi doctors and That's that's the movie. I want to make and did they survive Wait, was it the dwarves who survived Auschwitz? Yes Wow Warwick Davis and the dwarves of Auschwitz premieres premieres you Do you miss it why do you miss everything to call your agent willow made this What the fuck?

Davis tells you a terrible story of seven. Oh, so the word Jewish. Is it a doc though? Maybe you can do the obits family. Oh, I think it's a doc. It's a doctor. Yeah. Yeah, it's a doc You can still lie. She were Jewish still alive. Okay, we can still make the bread. Of course. You were Jewish I don't know. They're not gonna be like a man. We're just we're not to do it Of course you were Jewish. I don't know. They're not gonna be like hey man, we're not Jewish Hey, you know Why is the doc called Giants? That's gonna be good. That's gonna be great. Oh, no, that's a book All right, so that's a sad one. They lived. Yeah. All right. Give me another story

Tell me another dwarves story. Skeramonalu. What? Skeramonalu. Well that seems scary. No he's a I know it's now that I'm saying that out loud it's it sounds like a troll that lives in a mountain. I don't know how you spell Skeramonalu but he was a weightlifter. His nickname is Pocket Hercules and he made all comes back to Hercules it made I think it's the Turkish Olympic team but not as like not the Special Olympics he made like the actual Olympic team as a weightlifter damn and he's a little person yeah wow yeah yeah he look up see what he looks like yeah I don't know how

to spell scare monolou Well, sorry this story toward dwarf stripper gets bride pregnant Interesting on our night. That is not cool. That is not me. That's cool. We had the aboard If we go can we go to the Olympic thing or I don't know why you're going that try to find the guy very interesting Yeah, nickname pocket Hercules pocket Hercules may have been Turkish just pop. Yeah pocket Hercules weightlifter Yeah, and you should find it. Yeah, there's another story. You want to play that guy? I want I want to fucking play that guy Yeah, yeah. There is let me look at him. Is he scared monolou? Yep. Oh wow. I don't know dude. Yeah Look at that. Yeah.

Bam, dwarf story. Yeah. Let's. These are stories that should be told. These are. Gilbert, I want you to make the noise what he's doing right now. Yeah, I will.

Yeah. Yeah. Ooh, yeah. I don't think so, dude. What is your interpretation? Thank you for making it Andre the Giant. Here we go. Shh.

Shh. That Andre the Giant. Here we go. Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee That's the noise. That's the noise he was making. Now go accurate. That's a cool movie. That's a cool movie Yeah, but I think you're telling Oscar. Yeah, I think the Auschwitz one is oh, yeah. Yeah, the dwarves of Auschwitz Yeah, that's winning. Now, would you be mad if they cast average people to do? In the dwarves of Auschwitz? Yeah. Yeah. Yes. I'd be furious. But you think Peter Dinklage will be mad

Yeah, he'd be mad cuz he'd want that part. Oh, he'd have to be in that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We have to make that movie Dude, I'm so fun. I've been tragic too. Yeah, it'd be fun and tragic. It's fun. It's tragic. It's inspiring Yeah, cuz they live spoiler alert, but they live so let's make a new rule you and I no more Jokes about my race or your height height That didn't last long did it You know who I was making fun of yeah, I did it because I cuz I could say hi like it's too high like I can't reach That's good. Yeah, I definitely. Because I can say hi like it's too high, like I can't reach. Oh, that's good.

Yeah. So you think Adam will ever do your podcast again? Adam Ray, yes. We might. I don't know. I love going on the show now as a guest. And what show? About Last Night, which is the podcast. Oh, he still does is the podcast oh he still does it

yeah he does it he does it without you so yeah why I stopped because I had the kid and I wanted more time it was a lot it was a lot of work yeah and I think it's it would be a bigger thing because you're both a bigger now yeah I mean in terms of reputation is what I meant to say. Yeah. I haven't grown. Yeah. Yeah. 11 grown. Yeah. But I mean I because I remember I did it. Well I did it once. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I would revisit it. Mm-hmm. How do you feel about his success now? Love it. It's great. Love it. Yeah. There are certain people because we live in a business. We work in a business where sometimes people get famous and then we're like, as comedians, we're like, like, like we get jealous,

we get mad, we get, we get upset about it. But now there you go, Bobby Lee on a bat last night, episode number 403, all time classic. Wow. But, but Adam's one of these guys where he's worked so fucking hard for so long, so hard, and now he's finally getting the credit that he deserves. He's selling out theaters. It's so cool. Like to see you get yours, to see Andrew Santino get his, like it's just really... There are certain comedians I want to like manifest their their success now Like I now want them to get that like I want I want for him to fucking start playing theaters Yeah, well guys so good Laura peak America Amir okay? Amir whole America so I don't know why Amira's never done this he's we're so close

Yeah, why is Amir Kay not done Tiger Belly? Let's get shame. Let's get Amir K. It's a real shame. Amir, come on out. Because Amir and I are very close, you know, and him and I have good chemistry. It's shocking that Brad is the first time this year, because, you know, we know each other. Yeah, but there's so many great comedians out there, and now I think there's so many avenues for people to discover them, and I think it's fantastic because it's no longer like, it used to be there was like one comic that was doing stadiums, one, and now like we could each name at least five

that are doing stadiums which is incredible. So yeah, oh yeah there's my most recent special, Starfish. Oh, you too? Wow, look at that, it's insane. Please watch. Incredible. But yeah, Starfish. Oh, YouTube. Wow, look at that. It's insane. Please watch. Incredible. But yeah, I'm booked until New Year's Eve of 2025. Wow. Yeah. It's incredible. Go to the tour schedule and get some tickets. Starfish has 3.8 million views. Let's get it to four, people. Wow. Let's get the Tiger Belly boost. Let's get it to four. Well, now how did you release that through YouTube? Yeah. Wow. That's the way to do it. Yeah. The next one you're gonna do a streaming right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You're already logged in? You're logged in? You can cover your mouth if you want. Is there anything? We got some offers. Yeah. Yeah. So we're good. That's

great. Yeah. Things are really great right now. It's like when I started doing comedy, I don't know what your goals were in the beginning, but like my goal when I started comedy is I, and I'm retelling myself this, I just wanted to be a headliner comedian, a touring headliner club comic making, you know, three grand a week. Awesome. Done. I'll live on that for the rest of my life. So anything after that is a great bonus and now that we're doing theaters, it's just incredible. Never thought I'd get to this point. Hallelujah.

Hallelujah. Praise. So, uh- Praise Pryor. Follow Brad Williams on everything that you see. His Instagram handle everything. We're gonna have you back on here. Yeah. Your regular here. Hell yeah.

And thank you so much for making it such a joyous, informative hour. Thank you for waking up. We appreciate it, thank you. Give Brad a round of applause. Yeah! Oh, we got cupcakes! Last minute cupcakes! Let's go!

Can you buy these for him? I think we just did it in the middle of the talk.