TigerBelly - Connor Wood & Crossing Tribes

Episode Date: June 10, 2026

Connor Wood, stand-up comedian and host of Brooke and Connor Make A Podcast, joins the TigerBelly chaos for the 1st time. We chat Hollywood parties, meeting your heroes, Eddie Murphy encounters, dating questions, AI fears, Star Trek deep cuts, single tooth, and Barbie butts.Limited Time Offer — get 15% off on Huel online with my code TIGERBELLY at https://www.huel.com/TIGERBELLY.  New Customers Only, limited time, so don't sit on it. Thank you to Huel for partnering and supporting our show!That’s helixsleep.com/TigerBelly for 27% Off Sitewide. Make sure you enter our show name after checkout so they know we sent you! Download the Klarna app today or visit Klarna.comBefore we dive back into today’s episode, great news for comedy tv fans! Every episode of the Hulu Original series Alice and Steve is streaming on Hulu.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We're on Spotify video. Hey, Tiger Belly video now available to watch on Spotify, everybody. Spotify premium users get fewer ads and more eyes. We love fewer ads. And more eyes. We love more eyes. Yeah. Get the third eye.

Fourth. And watch more. Get Spotify premium. More, much videos and watch it. I rushed to get here, and I apologize for being late Connor. And I appreciate you coming and enjoy you. Is he doing scary vibes right now, Kat? No, no, I think he's just in a rush.

Out of breath. Yeah, yeah. I rushed out to get out. I left Mookie Vets House. Okay. The MOOC, I call him. Did you know who he was before you? Yes, I do.

I know Shoahatani. I know Muki. I know the whole thing. That's awesome. I'm a part of that. No, you're not. Stop lying. I'm a part of the whole thing.

This morning I was like, apparently Jules was like, where are you going? And you're like, oh, some guy, Muki's house. I don't know who he is. Yeah, I was kidding. And then Jules was like, Tito Bobby, that's Mookie Betts. And you were like, oh, what does he do? Of course. That's not true.

I was doing a joke. Connor, why would I fucking love? You know, my energy right now? Welcome to the show. Give Connor Wooder on a lot of applause, everybody. Yeah, yeah. Thanks for having. The comedic talent and what kind of coffee you're drinking, bud?

It's black. That's how I like it. Yeah? Give me a pound. Come on. They called an Americano because I'm staying at a hotel where they call it an Americano. That's what it's called. It's just black coffee, right?

No, there's a couple of shots of espresso in it. That's what's happening. Yeah, yeah. It's a different. I walked up the dry water with a couple of shots of espresso. Invented in World War II. Invented in World War II. that invented in World War II.

Why, George? Yeah. Because the Americans wanted their watered down coffee, not this thick-ass espresso shit. So they said, put some hot water in that espresso, and then that's how it became an Americano. You know, I was sitting outside on the driveway for five minutes before I rang the doorbell because I was trying it sober up from drinking half of this. Oh, it's been making me freak out every day. I've been telling you.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, stop freaking out. Stop drinking yet, maybe. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've been doing meth and I'm like, jittery. I'm like, I've got to quit meth. Because I'm so jittery, dude. I can't get hard.

It's fucking crazy. Oh, I said something's changed chemically in my body where, like, I can't drink coffee anymore. I'm acting. The first sentence I said to you, and I walked in, I was like, I was hoping, I came up and you were like, let's get you inside off the street. You look so nervous, dude, at the door. The driveway and the... Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Maybe stop drinking that. I'll have it. I'll take a breath. It's good. Me? drinks of water. Why? We're out of breath.

Oh, it's Italian, too. Italian. What do you? How do you? How do you fucking know? about Italians. I don't know. That was good.

Yeah? Yeah, you do a... What do you think? New York. You got a... Yeah, I would... This is like... Is that it?

This is like Jersey. It's not really... Like a mafioso. It's just loud and yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I'm walking in here. Yeah, you just kind of yell at each other.

But I want to be very... I'm not from New York. If that gets back to people that are from... I'm from Texas. Oh, you know, man. Yeah. How you doing you, man? I got to Texas? Yeah.

How are you doing? I haven't been back in a while. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's somewhere Mongolian. I'm okay. I'm okay. I'm okay. How you're doing, man.

Yeah. Check out my eagle. Yeah. Anyway. What did you do at Muki Betts's house? Yeah, no, we bowled. Oh, fine. Yeah.

Like we bowl? No, like an actual bowl. We actually bowled. He has a bowling alley in his house. Yeah, a lot of these people do. What are these people? Famous people. Oh.

Yeah, Michael Bay has a full-blown movie theater in his house. And I have a podcast studio. You know what? Michael Bay has an act. I use my space. My tiny space for a podcast studio. I could have had a jihitsu studio in here or, you know what? A jojo.

A jojo. Yeah, yeah, but I decided to do a pod. What are you looking at, Kahn? I'm looking around because I'm like, this is a big space, honestly, for a podcast studio. It would have been a good dojo, right? It's a great. I mean, it is a dojo. Yeah, if you think about it. I put in a suit at my house, it's just the one chair.

Oh, that's awesome. Because I do it remote, but then it's a right off 67% of my apartment. Yeah, yeah, that's great. Kind of worked out. That's amazing. You live in Jersey now? I live in New York. Well, I lived in New York.

We were talking the other day that My Lisa did. How do you know her? We just been following each other. We did a show together. In what world is in universe and metaverse? We were also all in Hawaii at the same. Hawaii at the same time Bobby yeah oh that's right that's right he played at the Blue Note you're in the Hawaii theater yeah blue note great venue played it is my diet it's great have you

have you done blue note yeah I love that venue it's cool I've heard it's awesome yeah you have big eyed white it's interesting you big eyed white yeah it's a great song big eyed white hit the keys okay okay blah thing blah boom So you're on tour or what? Kind of. I'm not doing like an official tour. We stopped touring last year. We did two years of tour and then we stopped and then we just have a couple shows going on just to get ready for Netflix as a joke.

And then that's right. Is it why you're out here? Yeah. Where did you play? The Avalon. Oh, that's a nice theater. It was awesome. It was really great.

How many seats? I think it was standing 700, but I think it was 700 seated. Oh, that's amazing. Yeah, it was a great show. I did 6,000. Anyway. Hit it. Hit the keys.

I started sweating again. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. This made my heart start. I'm talking. I'm kidding. No, I sold out because I bought the last six tickets, but. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it felt good. Did you go to the house? No, I didn't come across my desk. I think Dan Soder went on right after me.

He was probably. No, no, no, no, no. The Ted Sarandos's house Thursday. Oh, no, no, no, no. You weren't invited. I think I need to do a little more thousand for a seat before I get invited to Ted's house. Well, that was the first year I was invited. Really? Yeah.

I mean, everybody was here. That was the coolest. I'm zooming in on this photo. Yeah, a lot of people were there. A lot of balloons and faces. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Did you see this Tom Sawgura sabotage on it? What was it?

So Greg Fitzsimmons is in the photo. You know Greg Fitzsimmons? I do. Yeah, yeah. And so they had us throw a ball, right? Now, when they's telling me to throw it. a ball, what the fuck do I do? He's throwing a ball like your face. I don't throw the ball.

You never throw the ball, my friend, right? I just did a, so they did one, two, three, throw the ball, right? And I just went because I didn't want any, right? Yeah. Cigura does like a long throw. So they catch his hand here. Yeah.

Completely covering Greg Fitzssevon's face. I have the photo in my phone. Would you like to see it? I want to see it. I didn't notice that. Yeah, yeah. I'm going to show you. I wouldn't want my throwing for him in the... Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Yeah. Next time they say

throw a phone, a ball, I mean. Don't throw the fucking ball, dude. You know what I mean? It's a really good foresight. Has that happened? Have you had another ball drawing? It's an instinctual thing. So I'll show you the photo. Yeah, this is... That's... All right, so there's Tom... All right, so here's the... Oh, damn. All right. So, zoom in where I am.

Where are you? I'm in the middle. Why is there so much? There's so many people. Go in the middle. See me right there? You almost had it. Yeah, I see. Oh, my.

Why is it blurry? Why is it blurry? The only photo they have. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, I see the fist. Yeah, so I'm going to text you the high-depth photo. Please do, please do. Yeah, yeah, because there's a high-depth photo.

This is more people than the first one, right? Like, double? It's double the people, yeah. Jesus. There's a lot of fear walking. What does that mean? Well, you're completely anxious because I've never really seen the Eddie Murphy in the wild. Yeah.

Yeah. You know what I mean? And you see, you witness the Eddie Murphy in the wild, you know, right? And then you see other people that you've just never seen in the wild before. So let me ask you something. If you were at the house, right? And you saw, you don't put shit in coffee. It's like, it's strong.

Yeah, it's really strong. Yeah. If you were at the house and you saw somebody that you were a fan of, would you walk up to them? Yeah, I'm bad. I'm really bad at this. And this is something that, like, I know that it's exposure therapy. Yeah. I have not.

I have not like nailed this thing And there's a thing It's like well There's a couple signs I'm giving you here It's like whoa you weren't invited That's weird It's not weird if you see me outside I want to say this right

It was Mark Norman Sam Morrell Santino Me First time ever invited Really And we've been around for so long

So it's like Yeah I think of you guys Like OG Yeah yeah And this is the first time We've been invited So it's like Look at Spade there

You guys are heavy hitters Yeah, yeah There's Ronnie Chang With Tomlinson Taylor Tomlinson Yeah And who's the Who's what

The guy in the Above Taylor Who's the guy above Taylor? Yeah, who's that guy? I don't know And yeah Go to the left There's Will Sassa

Go to the left Dane Cook is acting like a spider monkey Yeah, he's over No look at Dane Cook Go more further Further No, to the left. More to the left. More to the left.

Spider-Monkey. What's on his hand? What is he doing there, dude? He's clinging onto the tree or something, but he's doing something. Well, that's the, yeah, that's the throwing for him. You don't want them to catch. Oh, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I think he's putting some spin on it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Wow, yeah. Yeah, so. So, Connor, you're weird around these situations. I just, you know, there's one out of every five, it is so, so detrimental to me, like, having a career in this. I think in this situation, I'd probably do a nonverbal.

Oh, nonverbal, I communicate. Who's that probably just not looking at? All right, so I'm Bob Odenkirk, right? I'm eating a pizza, right? And I'm looking over at you. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Oh, you look away. You look away.

Yeah, because I would already be looking at you if you're Bob Odenkirk. No, but to do verbal communication, you have to look at it. Oh, no, I'm doing. You can't look at the birds. I'm doing nonverbal. I'm not, I didn't say me a case. Oh, oh, I see. I'm Bob Odenkirk.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. That's not good. Zero. That's not good. That's not good. That's, it's better than I walk up and I share something that I, you know, I shouldn't. What I did was with Oden Kirk was I walk right to him.

I'm a comic and I just want to say you just one of the best and you influenced me so much. And he goes, I know fucking who you are. And he gave me a hug, took a photo with me, and we talked about Titanic, one of my favorite sketches on Mr. Scha. And then he told me about some folklore about the song. He was super sweet. Then I saw John Stewart.

I tapped him the shoulder. I'm just a big fan. And he gave me a hug and talked for a bit. And I did all that. That's awesome. And that's not your... That's not my thing. I know, but I'm asking Connor.

Like, that's not your approach. You got to learn to do that. So attack me on the shoulder and just... Let's see. I'm Eddie Murray. So go ahead. Okay. Sorry, I shouldn't have full,

full palms your back. That's not, no, no, no, no, no. I like that entrance, I should have done. I shouldn't have full palm. Yo, man, don't touch me. Yeah, that was. Yeah, don't touch me. Okay.

Uh, yeah. No, I agree. It takes that, that's, you can't, I just full palm, shoulder blade in my back. You gotta go right into compliments. Oh, that's, okay. Yeah, but what do you do? You're talking about your own behavior.

You get two seconds with the guy. Yeah, yeah, I loved. No, no, no, yeah. Okay, do it again. Okay. I loved rush hour. Eddie? Sorry, Eddie.

What's up, man? I really like the haunted mansion. That's the movie. No, but would you like, I really did like the haunted mansion? I know, but that's the movie. Wait, wait, he probably appreciates that. Are you? She's younger.

Because he's younger. Forty eight. hours, Beverly Hills Cop. I think Haunted Mansion, and then I could go to, you know, it's crazy is when I used to... You've already lost them. No, no, you haven't because I'm telling you...

He's talking now to Kevin Hart. No, that's not true. I'm telling you, Eddie Murphy loves that he has younger fans. I think he feels like he lost that group, and so a young kid saying, I love Haunted Mansion is the movie. Haunted Mansion for me,

and then you do something from the heart. I just remember being, I had a, for one year for Christmas, I got a portable DVD player, which was the coolest shit I had ever seen. And it was little and it was actually pretty big. It was the size of a laptop. Now I've lost him.

You've lost. He's packing his bag. He's also opening his bag to poetic. All right. Get out of. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But here's the rule. I pirated the Honodd Mansion.

I put it in a maybe he likes it. Here's the rule. It is a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. In this genre, yeah. But Connor, the rule is this, you don't touch, you don't. You don't touch Eddie Murphy?

I think he was, when he walked, no, when he walks into the, he was like one of the last guys to enter. And you could, he stopped the party for a split second. Right? And you realized, oh, you don't just walk up to the guy and go, I love haunted mansion. Yeah, I mean. So what I did, what miraculously what happened was, I was the first guy to be in the photo and he was right in front of me

and he looked at me and he goes, nice to meet you young man and he shook my hand. That's sick. Right? And I went, oh, he's the good to meet me too.

I loved you at Haunted Mansion. Yeah, I love the haunted mansion. Boo. Favorite part. But I do want to talk about if you had to tap Bobby. Yeah. Would you do this or would you go full palm like Connor?

I'm not big enough for a tap. You go directly to my face. No, I'm just saying if you were to tap. If you had to tap someone, do you use, do you do? Like, because I feel as though, this is really. I don't do your long E.T. finger. No, that's weird. Yeah, because this is really like offensive.

E.T. phone home. No, yeah, I don't do that. I felt like that too. No, this is what you do. This is what I do. That's what I was trying to do. No tap. You hold it.

You hold a little bit to know that there's a presence there. Maybe grab the collar of the shirt. Because he was in, all the incidences, do you understand what I just said? Incidences? That's how I would have said it to. All instances, right, right? Plural.

It that I encountered was a light hold on the shoulder to let them know that I'm around, but finish your conversation. Because they're all in conversation. Maybe, can I think this one? Go ahead, that? Thank you. Do it.

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Make sure you enter our show name after checkouts. They know we sent you. Helixleep.com slash tigerbelly. My strategy would be this. If I saw someone that I really wanted to talk to, I would kind of see if they were going to go get a snack. Oh, surveillance. A little bit of surveillance.

I see. And then if they were like going in for a cheese, I would be like, oh, me too. Kind of like, Oh, me too, cheese. I love me too cheese. You did that when I sat down here with the coffee. You drink coffee?

Me too. Yeah, we thought that was crazy. Oh, that's, you're, oh, interesting. But you're looking for a meat cute. Yeah, like a romance model. But then it's normal, so it's not like, oh, I'm like, I'm not like, you know, I'm just like, I also like cheese, Eddie Murphy. Boo.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I loved you in the cheese, Eddie. I know you weren't in that. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. This shit, huh? This big, uh, chocolate wasted.

You don't say chocolate in front of Eddie Murphy? I don't think. Because I think that he would, you know, misinterpreted that as something. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, chocolate. You don't do that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I get, like, this, was the whole, the whole day, the whole morning, how long did people stay? Was it like a level playing field situation or was there still like levels to, because everyone's invited. You're right. So there are divisions. It's like a high school kind of campus. Yeah, yeah.

So basically you're hanging out with your tribe. Okay. Interesting. And then you can see another tribe forming and you're realizing, oh, I'm, you know what I mean? Not that I'm lower class, but I'm like not there. Not that tribe. Yeah, yeah. Because you see the Seinfelds, the David Letterman, the Ellie Murphy.

The Cappell's up there. Chappelle's up there. Shepel. They're all now talking in a circle. Interesting. Right? And then you're like, you're over here with Mark Norman, you know what I mean, Sam, Maril, these times. What a great tribe, though.

You're in. It's a good tribe. It's a good. I'm not downing my tribe. In a war, we would lose. That's all I'm saying. I don't think so. It depends what the war is, though.

And then you have like the Nicos and the Malanis and them in one tribe. Yeah. But you know who's great? Spade. David Spade is always in our tribe, because Theo is in our tribe. You know what I mean? So it's like we have our own tribe.

Then I went for the Asians. Interesting. Yeah, so do you cross tribe? I cross tribe. Cross tribe. Yeah, yeah. And I went to the Kenjungs and the Atsucos and the Jimmy O Yang, and we took that photo.

I saw that. You know what I mean? Did they put on the people magazine? I think Eliza thinks she's in the Asian tribe. Why? Just seen. Oh, because she's just next to Jimmy O Yang? What are you saying?

I don't know. Oh, he's, oh, okay, I get you where you're saying. Do you know what I mean? She purposely went between Joe Coy and Jimmy O'Yang. Yeah, yeah. And she's squitting her eyes. Definitely, the squit was where I was right. Yeah, yeah.

But look at where, am I close? Oh, you're in a different track. Perspective, it looks like you're in the black track. Yeah. Yeah, but I'm still below, Eric Andre, I think I'm in a good. Is your tongue out? Yeah, it's my tongue's out. Oh, I was like, his bottom.

Donnell looks so upset. He's upset. He's sitting next to me. Because I went next to him and he's like, no, dude. Go somewhere else. And I go, no, I mean, I'm standing here. Can I ask, with all due respect, what is Kate Hudson doing here? It is cool.

Like, I have a huge Kate Hudson. I love Kate, too. Is she, was she, did she do a? It's a comedic show. Is that why? Yeah, I mean, these are like all comedy. Well, now you're going to get me off. Well, she's in rom-com.

Now you're going to get me up. Now go up to the corner. Nice Connor. Nice Connor. Now you fuck me up. All right. And wait, let me look. Let me look.

Let me look. Everyone here's a comic, right? No. Is Bill Burr there? No, Bill Burr's not there. I'm going to tell you. I think Scott MacArthur is there. No, I was only curious about her.

I didn't know if she had some new projects or something that's like comedy adjacent or comedy. There's a lot of actors that are in the comedic field that were there as. well yeah so you're sick that's cool that's awesome yeah you think that people were very calculated about where they were sitting oh yeah you could see a lot of moving and jangling and stuff like they're like wherever i'm in this picture yeah yeah yeah yeah but i felt comfortable in the spot i was in because i knew theo was above me and cicro's a friend you know mean and whitney's a friend and donnell's a friend you know what i mean so that was a nice little that's awesome yeah yeah but it's it was a um i walked through a lot of fear there

Random divines there Yeah so it was fun Anyway next year for you I'm gonna manifest it for you When they start letting just anybody Get to get to his house Well I'll be honest This is double the amount

Of the last photo Yeah this is a lot compared to last year Yeah so it's like I think they're gonna triple it next time Were there more shows this year? Yeah Yeah I think there were a lot more shows And you know what?

Our show I would thank everyone to come out for the other podcasts I do you know what I mean bad friends and they came out to see her show it was an excellent show awesome you opened I did he did a great job thank you yeah that's fun and

I'm glad your show went well it was great I don't do a ton of shows in L.A I was gonna ask how often you do too often okay yeah too often is the answer yeah what's it matter nothing nothing I just I have like thin lips I like it yeah there's almost none

yeah anyway I can make him go completely. I think it's weird with white people's lips. I don't know what it's. I have an obsession with white people's lips. I don't know why. He just doesn't like that there isn't a boundary with the lips for us, I guess. I don't know.

He doesn't like any lips cat. Oh. Yeah. He thinks mine are too plump. He thinks thin lips are too thin. It's like there's no, he doesn't like lips. I think he wants people to just have like an open hole in their face. I just, I, I, uh, I, uh, I, uh, I, what's the deal with?

Yeah, I'll tell you the deal. I'll tell you. And I'll be honest with you, dude. It's like, what is, it's unnecessary. I don't think so at all. It's an extra aesthetic that God went, I would just put these on. You know what I mean? And it's like, it could just be an open

hole. How about kissing? Yeah, kissing. You still have an opening. Yeah, but. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you'll be able to control with muscle. It would just be no color.

You could suck on the opening of the skin. You know what I mean? Like if your tongue kissing and stuff. I don't like it. All right. I'm not the designer. Maybe he was right. I'm not God.

Yeah, yeah. Can I have my own preference? I don't like eyelids. Oh. I want to open hole, no eyelids. That's so much. It's wrong with you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

You know, there's a lot of things I don't like about the human body. Yeah. No, same. I think we should have one, I say this all the time, one big tooth. It's crazy that we have like a bunch of little ones. That's insane. That's a very, dude, you're so smart. Oh, you have to floss?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It should just be one bone. One big one. Oh, like, that's a very, oh, that's a very, oh. kind of like bailing like a whale. Any, I think the things that we have right now are just, it feels, it feels like we made these on, I know that we've always had teeth. Yeah.

Now I'm going to start sounding real dom. Well, can I tell you, can I counter your point a little bit? No, because I'm on counter side, but go ahead. No, because the reason you, you're saying just one giant connected, like two. You have two teeth. I know, but just one up front or like a whole system, just one giant system. Yes. One giant system, I think.

Yeah, yeah. Because if it's like, if you think about it, like coral. one part of the coral gets that or cracked, then the whole thing is out. I hadn't gotten that. I had not gotten that. I'm going to defend it. I'm going to defend your point of view.

I just floss. I floss a lot and I have this thing where I can kind of like feel stuff in my. Right. I'm like, I should just, it was one big piece. Yeah. So here's another thing.

No roots. We should do. We should do one solid tooth, no roots. No roots. So there's no pain. Counter. How do you have no roots on your teeth? No,

I have many roots. Right? I don't want any. You don't want any. The pain. Free floating. Yeah, just one white tooth from end to end. And there's, it cracks and you can feel the crack.

The reason you need the root. Yeah, one big cosmetic tooth. One unit of teeth, I think. You need the root in order to feel what you're doing. There has to be a, in order for your brain to know what your teeth are doing, the teeth have to be connected to the brain. How does that happen via nerves? That's the root.

So then if not, then what? Why does your brain need to know what your teeth are doing? Because it's all feedback. What am I eating? Is this hard? Is this soft? Because if you don't have that information, you're just going to crack into a rock. I'll tell you how I know why it's not working.

I can't get into it. What do you mean? Like, here's a, just listen to my point of view. Okay. I got to hear that. You got to hear of this, right? I'm viding into gold, right? And I'm chewing it for a while.

Right? You got in it? No, I'm like trying to chew a bar of gold. Okay. A little bar of gold, right? Yeah. And after about... Everyone does that, yeah, yeah.

I was there right at the beginning. Yeah, yeah, yeah, pirates do it. With the gold's in your mouth. Yeah, pirates do it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'd be chewing on it, too. Give me a piece of a goal. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And after about six taps, right, I realize, I look and I realize, oh, I can't chew this. So your eyes are doing the work. Yeah. Yeah. Counter, please. Temperature. You need roots. My tongue has temperature.

Eh, can I have a... Maybe you can do your white tooth, but can we do different colors? Well, you can do that on your own at a facility. At that facility. So you can do that purple. You can choose one solid color black or whatever. You can dye them. A family member has such a big gap in between her two front teeth that instead of doing braces,

she just added an extra tooth between the two teeth. Oh, wow. Wow. She has one center tooth. Fuck it, new tooth. Yeah, new tooth. That's awesome. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's so much faster, too. She probably got that done same day and probably, like, could go eat, corn. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. She probably did it on her own. So I think that's pretty genius. Went to Michaels.

I'm not sold on the one-to's. Pop it in at my gun. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Health insurance, what? What about the human body as? I'll tell you another thing that I realized. I don't know if we talked about this, but I didn't realize that there were

two holes in a woman's vagina. Oh my God. I think that's a lot. We talked about that already, right? A lot of men don't know that, I don't think. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a good trivia question. It's a good trivia.

I would say. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I didn't know. I thought that the pee came out of the actual hole. That's so sad. I did too until I was like like. Like a fire hydrant. I think a lot of people would be shocked.

Did I say that talk about that already? Yeah, you did. You know what I did learn from, um. I cannot hear to see that one again. I did learn from Brooke and Conner's podcast. about the naturally healed penis. Who the fuck is Brooke? He does a podcast with Brooke.

She's my podcast co-hosts, Brooke Averick. We talked about that yesterday. Well, I posted this video. What did you talk about? Matrilineal penis. A naturally healed penis? Matrilineal penis. Well, like, Connor will explain.

Well, okay, look at my eyes and explain it. I had heard that you get your penis from your mom. Not literally you get your penis from your mom, but the build of your penis. Thank God. You inherited. My dad has a small penis. He's not responsible for it. It's not passed down from dad to son.

Your ass is your dad's. You have your dad's ass. You have your mother's penis. What about vaginas? Is that your dad's vagina? I didn't look into vagina. You have your dad's vagina. I for sure have my dad's vagina.

Yeah. Damn it. That's why it looks like bat wings. Hey. Hey. Hey. I'm walking over here. You have your dad's second hole.

I'm flopping over here. Yeah. That's interesting. Do you're, so I have my dad's ass Yeah, I don't know how... Cheeks, I think. I think the... Where's the asshole?

That's your grandma. That's my grandmother's asshole. That's your grandmother's asshole. That's interesting. Very interesting. It's weird. Well, hair loss comes from the mother's side of the family. Not always.

There's different kinds of hair loss. But it can. Yeah, your tone is really crazy. Yeah, your tone is very aggressive. It's not always. Yeah, yeah. Let me try again. Okay, say it again.

Yeah, yeah. I heard the hair loss is from your mother's side of the family. Not always. Okay, that's better. Better? That was a good delivery. That was a good delivery. Like, mental parenting.

Okay, yeah. It was a better choice. How about boobs? Are those from your dad, too? I for sure have my dad's tits. Yeah, yeah. Your daddy's tits. Thank you.

Yeah, yeah. That's not a good thing. It's not. I only really looked into... I'm not an expert, guys. And your other body parts, what do you think? I only look into my... Teeth.

One tooth. Where do you get that from? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I know stuff skips a generation, too, So there is, like, you probably have, like, different, your nipples are probably your grandmas or your grandpas. Yeah.

But I, I think the asshole should be on the bottom of your left foot. Oh. Actually, you know what? This is the one thing I do agree with you about. This is, I feel like where the asshole is, is not the most optimal. Sitting on it? Sitting on it? No, it's too close.

And from a girl's perspective, I will say just the amount of, like, UTIs you can get from cross-contamination. That's, yeah. And it's like the poop where the good stuff is. I just don't. love it. I don't love the... You pee out of your left foot, you poo out your right foot. Oh, interesting. Like a Pepsi Coke kind of machine. And then the penis is only for

sperm. Interesting. We could do a lot of work in here. How about... We have some ideas. We're writing a new Bible. But what about blood for women? Where does that go? And when you say blood, why did you do this hand? Because I think maybe it comes out of the right hand.

Oh, you know, for your period. Period, yeah. Yeah. Well, the baby comes out of the vagina, so I would say the same. Keep it there. Keep it there, yeah. Wow. I mean, God did a perfect job in designing us, so we're not, God, I'm sorry, you did a perfect job. I'm just throwing out some suggestions. For the next round? For the next round. Yeah, yeah.

I do get confused about evolution, like a lot. Tell me about it. Just like, tell me your comfort. Stuff evolves. I know that I'm, I know that I'm evolving a little bit because I hold my phone. Oh. Oh, here we go. I hold my phone. It's a heavy phone. Fones are heavy kind of if you're not built very well. and I got my grandma's body, so. Okay. I hold my phone like this, like on my pinky.

Yeah, yeah. And you see, when you look at my pinkies separately, maybe, maybe I have some more hands. Maybe just from the, this side. You see that little ridge here from. Oh, I have it. Oh, I see. Oh my God, I have it too.

Wait, I have it my right hand. Wait, wait. Just my right hand. Yeah, yeah, because you don't hold you. Do I have a ridge. Oh, my God, I have a rich too. Yeah. I'm the pinky.

This is bad. Yeah, because I hold it like this. Yeah. Oh my God years of holding this Wow so I don't know maybe our kids are gonna have really strong Grotesque binkies yeah so scary You know I I mean I want you to cut this part out and this is something that's evolved into my penis But I can't have it I can't have it out there

I'm not sure if evolution works within one generation No no I'm talking about because we hold our thing like this there's a dent Because I use vaginal machines right There's a dent no the middle of my because I've the sucking thing, the middle of my penis, right? Yeah. Is super thin now. Like an hour glass?

Yeah, so it's like an hour. It's like an hour glass. You have a Kardashian. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It has a doop like that, like a vase. People pay a lot of money for that. Yeah, I know. And it's longer.

No way. That's good. Because my, the sucking, it's really powerful. Why don't you do the whole? It goes. I think it was kind of like. And it's made my, that's what I'm saying. The shaft thinner.

Wait, so it the shaft is, it redistributed the meat. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they put it up top? Yeah, yeah, the meat's on the top. Both. Meat on the bottom, meat on top. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh my gosh.

I don't know if I can put that out there. Jimmy John's order. Meat on the bottom, meat on top. I'll have a Jimmy's way. You might sell it. You might push a lot of these devices. It really did. So I don't know if I can put that out there,

but it's transformed it. Through use. An affiliate link would be great for me. Really start moving some units. This might have to be a warehouse instead of the dojo. That's funny. Very good. But that's smart.

I mean, you were in marketing, right? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If you were to tell me, by the way, in college, high school, not only are you, you're having a great experience at home with this device, but also you're at the gym, essentially, your dick's getting bigger by using this? No, not bigger. Longer. Longer? Yeah. Bigger in... It looks like an Udo-Noodle.

Yeah. U-Don. It used to look like Soba. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The chef. Very good chef. Yeah, yeah. No, but it's changed. So I guess, you know, years of doing this has put a dent, right? But there are some other things that your body gets affected by use, you think? Easy payments. Klarna.

You guys, you know, looks maxing. We talked about it earlier. I have to say, and I don't want to put you on the spot, Alex, we need to max out your look. Right? So we're going to do some payments here. What's wrong with it? Describe his body.

Shoes. Well, he's shaped like a water buffalo. Okay. We can't help that, but yeah. We can't help that, right? But I think the clothing, we can, So we're going to go and we're going to buy you some clothing. Yeah.

Right. And so, you know, a vintage look, right? Cool pants and some shoes. Well, so you could, with Klarna, you could also money max because you'll be able to have more money in your account and do it in force, you know, small payments or how many small payments you need. Yeah. So you'll money max on top of your looks maxing as well. Exactly. So you're doing both actually.

Yeah. Looks maxing and money max. What else? There are Rams. I like that also it's really easy. It's just like four easy payments, you know. It's very nice and, you know, life is complicated. Yeah.

Klarna also offers value, transparency control, and no surprises. Pay now, later or overtime, whatever fits your lifestyle, really, to be honest with you. All right. So what do you think we should get Alex to help his Hobbit feet? Where I will. Is it a Hobbit? You know how they say men's women's? Is there like mythological?

Yeah. Is it like a hoof or something? Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I have really extreme wide feet. You do. You might need Tim's, right? I think we get him Timbs.

Because then you can also, you'll get a little taller. are pretty tight though Yeah they're tight It's leathery it's tight How about a burke and stock? Oh I like burks Yeah burks are cool We'll do burks are cool

Let's do some burks right there What size Alex? Let me guess Bobby what do you think What size is? The length probably four foot The width 19 foot

So four by 19th 4 by 19th I think Yeah maybe let's go to Home Depot Bill them one The way Zoom in on those pants That's what he needs. You need that, dude.

Okay, so we'll get a... Yeah, yeah, yeah, that looks back. With the burks. With the burks. Yeah, so you get the whole thing with the burks. Yeah, yeah. We're ski masks. That's the first one right there.

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It's very interesting. I saw a picture. Maybe driving. Maybe we're getting like. Techneck is real. Yeah. Oh, tech neck is for sure. Real.

Yeah. Yeah. You do have a slouch. I know. Yeah. And it's not a bad thing. I've always had it kind of. And you're also, can I just say another note that you're doing?

Another note physically for you. It's just like, I get your hair. It's a good note, I think, yeah. I noticed at the YouTube theater show, you're in the middle of the thing again. I was walking around on there. I just to go to the front of the stage. Okay, okay. I thought I was.

You're too middle of the stage. Okay. Okay. And it's like, it's a fear thing. Like two four back from the audience? From the audience. Oh. Yeah, yeah.

And it's like, I used to do that. But how big? Is the stage really big? You stage pretty big, yeah. That's scary. That's not my concern. My concern is connecting with the audience, locking eyes with them, and being apart. And it's, you know, an alpha thing.

I'm not alpha on beta, but definitely a bottom. I think you're alpha. I think you have to be a bottom. Yeah, yeah, yeah. In prison, I'm a, like, if I was in prison with Alex, he'd be like just laying your stomach. But how about your back? I'd be like every time. Come on twin.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, every time. I don't think so because you're a guy who likes to hump once in a while. You like to get up there and hump. I don't think, oh, I see what you're saying. You do your. I don't think you're a bottom. I don't think.

I think you want to believe you're a bottom because you're the smaller guy. You're shorter. Yeah, yeah. Why did you look your lips? I thought you were looking at her. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm sure that's a tight shot on someone else. Yeah.

No, I'm like, um. How about if your butthole? on your foot though and then you have anal sex how does that work well that we will eliminate that oh yeah yeah because i don't i'm not that's not my thing but how about the gay community yeah keep it at that yeah i didn't think of that yeah i yeah go ahead Connor i think that you just you just we our brains would change if our brains would be like i that i need to i need to have sex with your foot right now yeah yeah and then you could just do it you could be doing doing other things.

You could be driving. Yeah, you could be driving. You could be, you know what I mean? I'm watching love on the spectrum. Wait, now I think God's actually quite a genius for keeping it up here. I think you're right. It's because people, you can lose your limbs. Yeah.

It's really hard to lose your asshole. Your asshole. Yeah, I've never, I got in a car accident. I lost my asshole. That's never happened. Everything else is fine. I was on a motorcycle. I lost my asshole.

I mean, yeah. Good point. You would have to be like impaled. but like, you know, it's easier to lose like a digit or a limb. Yeah. In your butt hole. Really reverse engineered that can, that really simple. I know.

We did. Yeah. Thank you, God. And on top of it, it's also, it's like I'd rather lose an arm or leg than the butthole. Yeah. Because at that point, you need to put things in your body to do it. Like plastics and machinery, you know what I mean?

And other things. You have to carry around another thing. Like a colostomy bag. Yeah, or something. Yeah, and it's not sexy. You're at the club. I mean, and you have a bag. You know what's in your bag?

They're playing fucking daft pong. Shit. Yeah. And you're trying to, you know, you know what I mean? I would make my not see-through, probably black. You'd probably have some sort of print on it. Yeah. Like Gucci.

No, Gucci, coach. No, but that's what they do now. Like a lot of people with ostomies or any kind of like bag situation, if they've had to get, I don't know if you know what a Barbie butt is, is if you've had like chronic ulcerative colitis or Crohn's. They just kind of shut it so that you, and then they do, if you have to live with an ostomere, a bag, they have really cool options now.

Like a satchel? Yeah, they're very discreet. It's like a whole thing now because I have friends with ostomies and... I have no friends with osomies. You do. Why is it called Barbie butt? Because Barbie doesn't have a butt. She has, what's that?

Crohn's is it? I figured it. I figured it out. No, I didn't know that. Which means, you guys were like, God, well, I had never heard that term, but immediately I was like, I'm not gonna ask, I'll figure it out, and I've been,

that's why I've been quiet. Just figuring it out in my head. You know, go ahead? No, I mean, I just, go ahead. Well, no, I was gonna exactly. Exactly what? I'd throw up. Yeah, tell me.

No, I just, I get, I have this girl on TikTok that does, she makes cool versions of all these inherently, like not, shit bag. Great to look at things. Yeah, and they make some cool and then people can don't even notice.

Yeah. Which is sick. I think it's cool. Except it would suck if you did show up with your Gucci colonoscopy bag or what is it? Yeah, like,

and then they had to be like, we have to check your purse at the door like the bouncer. Oh yeah, that's what's that about? You go through TSA. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. If you want to look,

no, that would be a little bit put them on blast situation. Well, there's a zipper then, is what you're saying. Yeah. Zip? Take a look. It causes some issue.

I'm sure it causes people some issues. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just like another. Yeah. What a great way to hide a weapon, though. I was going to get there. Yeah. That's where I was going to get there.

Oh, you're going to look at my shit bag. They're like, no, don't know. Yeah, it's okay. Exactly. And you can have like a plastic gun. Yeah, a plastic gun. So it doesn't, you know what I mean? Set off the sensor.

Ghost gun. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then you have a poo gun. I think that's a scary. Yeah, that's what's, I don't know why we went down this rabbit hole. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I think it was your fault. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I think you both conspire. Yeah, how did we? Yeah, yeah, yeah, because you were like, you know what I mean? Yeah, I was like, was that on our bullet points? Started from a single tooth. Yeah, yeah, it went from two to that. 20 minutes. Yeah, and it was like, you know, we shouldn't question God's design.

I think that's the point. Yeah. What are you writing down? Oh, I'm just crossing off things. Oh, you have other things. Oh, so that was a colossal bag. The first thing on my list, you, I tried, to bring up and you like batted it down.

You're like, nah, bitch. All right, so let's start with that. And I wanna- No, no, it doesn't matter. I wanna see- No, let's just try. No, it was the sunglasses issue because I had- Oh, your eye, let me see your eye.

Let me see your, what are you guys doing? I'm sorry, we, I, she was like, oh, looking at my watch. It doesn't work, it hasn't worked into like five years. Why do you, why do you wear it? It's kind of like a habit, you click it on when you leave. It says it's- Is it like a lucky charm? Like you wear it because it's good luck.

I know how to read a clock or a watch. I just, it's 9 p.m. Yeah. And it just stays at 9 p.m. Yeah. Let me see your eyes. It's moving. No, I don't want to show my eye.

I want to see your eye. I, no, I don't want to show it. If you don't show your eye, you don't show me your eye. I showed them earlier. I want to see the eye. I didn't notice it until you said it. I didn't know until you said it.

Yeah, you look like a cross-eyed. No. You always do. No, it's a thigh. Yeah, looks the same. Cross-eyed, what's new? Which I'm attracted to. Ew.

I know you are. Yeah, yeah. No, I am. All my girlfriends have been, except for the current one, has cross-eyes. Really? Yeah, I love it. Light, slightly.

Yeah, I like it when it's a little, I don't like it when it's out like Michael Shannon. Yeah. You have more of a Michael Shannon. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's too E.T. like for me. What the heck? What do you?

What the heck? Dude, my eyes. like this? No, I'm just saying they're farther apart than what I like. Okay, you like Yeah, yeah, yeah. But that's my personal preference. Together. I mean, that's incredible to know that much about what you like. Yeah, yeah.

That's incredible. Yeah, you're, let me look at your face. Good face. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's a very good face. Do you think? Yeah, I do. Wow. But it's still not what I, if you're a female, would I would be attracted to. Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I understand. You look kind of like Paul Revere. Oh, he's okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You guys know what Paul Revere?

That's just my gut instinct. Oh. It is Paul Revere. I think it's a camo hat too. The camo hat. Yeah. Okay. Ouch.

Yeah. Yeah. Come on. I was pretty close. I was pretty close, dude. He looks a little bit cross-off. Paul Rufi. He has no, what?

He loves tea, dude. Yeah, yeah. He looks a little cross-eyed to me. Yeah, yeah. But I'm just saying the vibe is like you could deliver messages from town to town really quickly. Okay. Yeah.

The British, say the British is coming. Say it. See the British is coming. The British are coming right now. They're on their, the British are coming. The world, that's cool. I would, mass tax, like, British are literally here. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I would go, the British are coming! Oh, yeah, like, so then I have to, because I feel like you're doing individual to individual. Yeah, it's like a larger. Yeah, there's a lot happening. I'm forgetting the level of urgency that he had. There was a lot of urgency. I'm forgetting what the situation was.

I didn't know if they were coming. I know it was, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It was very urgent. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I would not, you would not be the pick of, like, warning the towns. Why? I don't think you have the vocal intensity to do it. Oh.

Oh. Yeah, I think I'm more of that. Yeah, it's, no. I think you for sure. They're like, what? You're the, you're the armed guy. Dude, I am the Korean Paul Revere. Okay, do it.

And. Well, I'll be good. It's going to be so loud. Okay, good. Yeah. Okay. Ready? Yeah.

Yeah. Wow. You didn't even have to ride the, you could just do it in one town. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. One town, that's it. That's great. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't you think?

Yeah, no, you're the guy. Yeah, I'm the guy, dude. Okay, Connor, maybe you try now. I can try. When I really yell, I should stand up, too. Yeah, yeah, go. Yeah, go. Yeah, go far away.

We're just, you know, we're all meeting. I just want you guys, I'm going to get ahead of it. I have a vein when I really yell, it does go down. Love it. It's fun. It doesn't Angelina Joe Lee vein. Yeah. Yeah.

It doesn't look like that on me. But don't get a stroke. Ready? Right. Right. Your sounds modern. His does sound like Paul Revere. You do it now. I will say that his voice kind of carries a little bit more than you are.

Really? Fuck you. Just by a smith. Cist eye. I'm kidding. All right. So you step away, Kat. Let's see.

Step away. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, go a little back, distant. Yeah. No, urgency.

They are coming. Wait, cue me in. Yeah, one, two, three. The British are coming! What are you some? She's on the side of the British. The British are coming. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

People are just still plowing, making butter. She's a witch. They're not moving. They're not moving. Yeah, they're not moving. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, her again. Why does she do this every?

Every fucking week. We tried to hang her a long time. Yeah, yeah. But that's still a very good look. You know, I mean, you have a very good look. I mean, I had not, I didn't know. It was funny, the cadence of polar reviewers, is that what you were kind of saying? No, I just think that you have a colonial look. That's so fascinating.

Yeah, yeah. And you are, like maybe a quill? Because people have been. I think you both have a Rockefeller, not Rockefeller, who's the painter, Norman Rockwell. Yeah, Norman Rockwell White. Is that the guy with a pitchfork? Yeah, but he's the artist. Okay.

He's done many portraits, right? And you have traditional, you both have traditional white looks that Norman Rockwell would use, which is, I think it's a good thing. Okay. Right? You know, you guys are both likable looking. You know what I mean? Very Americana to me.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. And it makes me feel safe, you know. I think George. I think George does not have that. What? Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, you have more. No, you're not Rockwell at all.

Maybe you're like the shoe Shiner. You know what I mean? You're in the background, but you're not like the focal point. These are focal point true Americans. Focal point. True American. Yeah. That's scary.

Like if I was, if I was an artist back then, let's suppose I was like a Norman Rockwell. I was walking on the street. And I love you as a human being, right? but you wouldn't be like my first like, hey, you want to be the center point of... Well, the center points all look like they've been through the Great Depression.

They all have a little bit of a... I would dirty them up. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I would dirty them up. I think that what Bobby's trying to say is, let me help you out. Is that if you were... I would hear what I was saying. No, like, if there was a Christopher Nolan movie and people had to be cast, like you would get cast in Dunkirk.

That's what I would say. That's what I'd say. George would not. George or not. Yeah, yeah. I look like I would die early and in a war. No, no, no. I think you and Harry Styles are like,

together. Okay. You know what I mean? And together. Yeah, yeah. And you're like, he would be the focal point. Yeah, right.

Yeah, yeah. Okay, wait. Yeah, yeah. Wait, wait. Wait, who's the guy? That's, that's me. Yeah, yeah. So that's.

You know the guy that's right, but not the guy in the left. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I love all your jewelry. Got confused. That is a hair style that we went with.

Just bring up the cast of Dunkirk. And I'm telling you that's where Connor belongs. Yeah, cast of Dunkirk. That's Alfalfa. I've been getting, I'm liking this. Yeah, it's very good. It's a very good look. What are you talking about?

I've been getting Charlie Kirk a lot in my DMs recently. Yeah, it's like good. Oh, come on. Oh, wow. Dude, that's you look like. Right now. He would fit in that. You would fit into this movie.

I didn't know that Harry Styles was in this. Yeah, he was. He was really good. Yeah, he was. No way. So you look like one of those. All-American, I could see you in Normandy. You know what I mean?

As a medic. Wow. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's see what Cat would be. Cat would be a waitress on the Titanic. What the heck? A waitress on the Titanic. Let me see.

Yeah. Yeah, or you know those British movies about the royalty? What's that? Oh. What's that TV show that's super famous? Downtown Abbey. Yeah, you're downtown Abby one. Not downtown.

It's downtown. Downton. No, she's downtown. Or. No. You're definitely downtown Abby. Downtown Abby. The British are really coming now.

Yeah. Or you're the one that's. Fed Oliver twist the porridge. Oh. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, you're a porridge giver. Giver. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

She's like, please, uh, ma'am. Mom, could I have another? Yeah, and then you're like, you giving me the porridge. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, which is a good thing. That's nice. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'll take that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You were, Eddie Murphy up getting porridge. I'm getting porridge too. I like porridge too. Oh, call back.

There is no historical film that I, you could possibly put me in. You, 100%, I can. What? Apocalyptic. Holy shit. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. If I, put your head back. Yeah, you're right. You know what I mean? Tattoo's on your face. Yeah. Throwing spears. You know mean? Yeah. Yeah. You're definitely apocalyptic. Yeah. I'm not native. Yeah. I're indigenous, but yes, I think we could cast you as that and dirt you up. And I think, not that they're dirty. But I think Prince of Egypt. Prince of Egypt. I think we could do. How's that not? How is that not you? Or the Road to El Dorado? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. If, if. If, if. If, if. If, if. If,

Make that photo, make that photo, right? Through chat, TBD, make the eyes closer and put a cyst on one of the eyes. And make her right face a little paralyzed. Let's see what happened. Yeah, give you 15 minutes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, but.

How about you? Did we have a movie for you? I'm afraid of what you're going to say. I'm afraid of what you're going to say, but I want the honor's true than I can handle it. Go for, Connor. I don't think. I just got here.

No, no, Connor, be real. Well, I actually didn't know that last, like, six movies. I was laughing and nodding, but I haven't seen any... I don't know what Marado is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I didn't know about Egypt. This is a very good thing with that Rockwell Whites do. And, um...

It's divert. They ask, they act confused. And like, they can't put, you know what I mean? And that's what you're doing. No, I'm acting... I'm telling you right now is... I'm not asking you. Okay.

I'm telling you what movie do you think, or what genre or what I would be in. I see you in a... I see you in a... Hawaiian shirt. Oh. Yeah. Okay. Yes.

Like a Hawaiian shirt. Yeah. You know what? Maybe, you know what? Maybe this could be? Maybe this could be an issue for the industry that I can't recall a movie that I think you, like, would be a great, maybe they're not telling those stories. Oh, so what?

Nice move. Nice move. What? That's a nice move. That's a very good move. That's a very good survival thing. Kung Fu Panda. You said

It's not even real people I know What's the ingredients now lately It's actually sugar free Do we think that or? Yeah I don't know It's a little weird No way

Yeah It's very good And animated Have you guys Do you like Diet Coke Over Coke light Yeah this is my preference No Coke light in Asia

Oh yeah Coglac Asia What's you fucking talking about See then you don't know I don't know It's noting Yeah yeah yeah I've never had Cucolite

I'm not a world traveler like you. Yeah, you are. Yeah, you are. I've never had Coke light in Asia. I saw you drink it. Oh, yeah. Yeah. That's all you drank in the Philippines.

I've had it. Yeah, yeah. It's just Coca-Cola light. Diet Coke. I dare I say. It's not Diet Coke? It is. It is.

But they call it Coke Light and it's better. Yeah. Where's the chat photo, man? It's working on it. It's working. This is so silly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Why is it silly?

Nothing. It's just the cyst in the eye. Connor, can I ask you a question? I would love that. So I'm doing these chat GPT posters Okay every night You hate them right? I hate them so much

I know I think they're working though Tell me why you hate them Because it's like clearly chat And it's just I don't know corny I know but I don't know what else to do that I love when you do the Canva one yourself

Those ones are more interesting to me You don't like the chats ones No I think they're fun I'm sorry That's okay it's okay You see the new one I like the David Attenborough The Planet Earth one

I think it's just I'm over just the chat. I just like, I know it's chat. But the Canva one, the weird ones where you're putting Kim Jong-un and like random people in it. I like that style. I like your style better than chat. Okay.

That's all I got to say. So you think it bothers people? No, probably not. Probably people probably like it. It doesn't bother. Thank you. I am. A lot of people, I think they like it.

I think you get a lot of likes on it. Yeah. Yeah. So it's just you. It's just me. It's just me. But what was that alien that I was that you put me at? You were a frangy.

Oh. Yeah. Who's that? Okay, so in the Star Trek next generation. Okay, I'm out of... No, I'm out of touch with Star Trek. Yeah, I'm just... I'm informing you.

I know, I'm sorry. I should have watched it before. But in Star Trek, obviously there are... Can I ask you some Star Trek that basic trivia? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Good luck. Good luck.

I'll have it before both of you. No, no, no, no. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, so in that world, what was the first human... What alien race was the first human contact with? with Earth. It was an alien race. It's a basic one? It's basic. Yeah. Okay. There's not even a point.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Does it sound like a word that we might know? You might have to give him a little. It starts with a V. It starts with a V. Do you know the actor Zachary Quinto? Quinto. Leonard Nimoy, have you heard of him? He played one. Nemo. Yeah. Not Nemo. Not Nemo. Quinto, Jonathan Quinto.

Vinto? We're going to go with... No, no, it's just with a V. Vento. No, the Quinto's the actor's name. Oh, he's... Zachary place. He's one of them? Yeah, yeah, yeah, it has nothing to do with.

In Quinto and it doesn't... Yeah, I'll give you another hint. I'll give you another hint. Okay. This is not West Side. No, this is... Yeah. You know, with my...

Here we go. That's you. I'm sorry, Klala. And you also hate... You look like you've been a beaten. Pretty, though. Yeah, yeah. What is the storyline?

That looks like your angry ex-boyfriend in the corner who's like... Oh, Jesus. Yeah, yeah. Me. You're not angry at me. No, I'm not. I love you.

But let's go back to that. Yeah, Vintone. See, with my new finger notch from my phone, I can't even do that. I know. I understand that. That's going to be a lost art. Yeah, I'll just tell you what it is.

Okay. Vulcan. I knew that. I knew that. No, you didn't know that. No, you didn't know that. Now that you said Vulcan, I was like, that's completely,

It wasn't on the tip of my time, but I've heard of it. Vulcan I've heard of. Oh, yeah. And Spock was a Vulcan. And I know Spock. Yeah, I know Spock. Oh, yeah, and he does this. He does this a lot.

Right, so all you had to do, did you know it? Of course. Kalilin of. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, of course you do. See, I know Vulcan because there's a venue in Austin called the Vulcan room. And did they do this? I don't know. I don't, no.

I didn't, and now it's a Star Trek. I know a lot of women with that haircut now. The microband. Nothing to do with Vulcans. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The baby bangs? The baby bangs.

Oh, yeah. The hot girls always wear the baby bangs. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, so those, can you name me any other race in the Star Trek universe? Uh-huh. You can't. Um, yeah. A fearing, firing.

The one that I just, I just said it. You didn't specify which other race. Oh, you were trying to say Ferengi. Yeah. What the fuck you said? Look up Ferengis, please? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Would never even ended.

Yeah, you never heard of a frangay. I've never heard, even when you, you must have said it, and it even went over my head. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's his Instagram. That's a frangie. This is what you made me out in the phone. Yeah. Holy.

That whole, holy shit. Are they nice? I've never even seen that. No, they're actually, like, really crude, rude, rude business people, and they have no, like, you know, allegiance to anybody. They're just barterers and they believe in commerce. but they're also shady. You can't trust them.

Okay. Yeah, that's how I feel about you. Anyway, you've never heard of Klingons? I know Klingon! So what do you say? No, Klingon! You know a lot. Yeah, yeah, you're not thinking.

Klingon, Ferengi, Vulcan. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know, this wasn't, uh, and Spock. Yeah. If you were to explain to me what Star Trek was about, oh man. Could you explain it to me both of you? Well, I imagine it's a trek and

this, for the Star Trek. In space, there's a lot of commerce back and forth with the. The trekking in there. I understand there's a lot of... They're searching for something. There's a lot of... There's not a ton of agreement out there because there's not a ton of...

But it's not Star Wars. Rules. It's just a big part of my life. Star Trek Next Generation's, the Star Trek universe. I need a TV show, so maybe you'll... I don't think you'll like it. Really? But if you were going to...

I've said this before. If you're going to get into it, season five... Okay. Oh, yeah. The second to the last episode. Do you need to, is it episodic? Can I just tune where?

You just tune to that one? Yeah. Okay. And the episode's called The Inner Light. Okay. And it's the season five, second to the last episode. I think it's the best piece of sci-fi television ever made. Okay.

Starlight. So what's it called? Star Trek Starlight? No, inner light. That's your special. Yeah, yeah. And Spock's in this one? You both don't.

Yeah. No, it's next generation, so Spock is... Spock has passed away. He's not passed, I don't think, by season five, no, he's still... Wait, sit next generation. No, he's dead. Spock's dead. Did the actor that played Spock get so many opportunities from being in Star Trek

that he, like, got too big and they killed him off? No, what happened was in the new J.J. Abrams Star Trek episodes, in the second movie, what happens is the real Spock Leonard Lee Nimoy gets caught in some sort of time wormhole and goes back in time

and meets Zachary Quinto and now he's stuck in that timeline so there's one of the movies I don't know which one there's three of them where Zachary Quinto gets told that Leonard Nimoy died

it's super sad And then he has to contemplate. Yeah. What? That sucks. I hate when people die. It's rough. I know.

He has to contemplate, you know what I mean? That whole idea. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

It's like if I went back in time, like, when I'm 90 and then I meet, which is, would be weird to meet your 30-year future self? Oh, I would love to. I would love to spend a day with my 30-year-old self at 90? Yeah, yeah, and she goes, it gets real bad. Oh, what if that? What if she gives you just bad news? I'm going to be your future self.

Okay. All right. Hey, man. What happened to me? Good question. When does this happen? What do you mean, man? Hey, hey, T, you're older self.

Your dick's about to get really long because you're going to buy that thing. Yeah. It's twisted now, bud. What? No, I'm going to tell you, Drew, all right? Things get really good. They do. Oh, yeah.

I forgot what time period. How old are you now? I'm 29. Oh, shit. Yeah. I thought it was coming for the 37, Connor. It gets really bad. Okay.

Until you're 37. The next 10 years. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. It gets bad. Is it a money thing? Is it a relationship thing? You're going to lose limbs.

Oh, geez. Yeah. But you'll keep your body. But my butt stays in the same place. Yeah, yeah. I'm cool with it. Yeah, yeah, that stays the same. I'm cool with it.

And guess what? In the future, you get it re-corrected. I put, I get a new. You get a new butt hole. I get a new butt hole? Yeah, yeah. And it's rainbow colored. Okay.

Yeah, yeah, because you're really into the movie. Okay. Then that's, you're really into the movement. That's great. Yeah. I'm happy for me and my new butt hole. Well, it gets shredded. It gets bad at first.

It has to get bad before I get my new butt. Yeah, yeah. The whole reason why you get a new one is. Anyway, what are you looking at? I'm trying to think if would you want, like today on the table, like, would you, they're like Bobby, 87 year old Bobby wants to speak to you. You have five minutes to think about it. Would you take the call or not?

Yeah, because what I would do is I would go, I would want to know, because I have so much anxiety and I have so much like unanswered questions about the future and this and that, and I ruminate a lot. I think it's getting better, but I would probably take a five-minute meeting. with him. What if? What if? Okay, tell me. 87. Okay, you pick up the phone. Yeah, what's up? Hurry, five minutes.

Okay. Okay, what? You need to leave comedy today. Oh, that's crazy, yeah. Why? Disconnected. Yeah. That's it. Go. What if you? No, I want more information. Why?

Five minutes. You will lead a life very lonely, depressed, and unfulfilled. Only chasing something very surface versus and you will die alone. And I will die alone. It's true. It's getting too real. Every comic is like, oh.

I know. Like today, today. Like right now. This is the turning point. It's either you leave now. Yeah. Or. You're stuck.

Yeah, you're stuck. All right. Well, then. And what do you think is going to happen? Because you've only lived. You've only lived the life that I was about to take. So how do you know it's better? I have no one.

Yeah, but I haven't had anyone in the last 25 years. Even if I quit, I could still have no one. Oh, good. Maybe, but you don't know that one. You don't know that. Yeah, so it's still an unknown. Well, no, that's not true because I, there have been opportunities down the road

where I could have led a life, you know, with family. So you want me to go get a regular job? Yes. Okay, I'll work at where a bobo shop. Best buy. Okay. Bobo shop. Boba shop right.

Yeah, that's it. Hang up. Click. Click. And I would probably go. Wish you hadn't taken the phone call, right? Yeah, I don't think that's what he's going to say. No, I'm just saying that's what he would think is now that you know this.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, don't you wish you wouldn't know that? I think you'd have too many follow-up questions. Yeah, exactly. You wouldn't have enough time. That was literally 40 seconds. I think in four minutes I would have got more information. Not a chance because you're going to be like, what do you mean?

You have a girlfriend? No. Okay. Connor, would you want to meet your older 87 years? Would you take that phone? Why don't you have a girlfriend? Because I'm leading this lonely, depressing life, right? I see, I see.

I'm focusing my career right now in the past 10 years. But I'll let you know. That feeling that you have now? Yeah. That's what she's getting it. I'm okay, by the way. I feel like that. But that feeling never goes away.

Yeah, yeah. I mean, I've been doing it for 30 years. It never goes away. There is a set. The feeling of I haven't made it yet. What do I need to do to make it? More, more, more, more. Yeah, the chase, the chase.

Yeah, the chase. Yeah, the chase. I haven't gotten it yet. You know what I mean? And it's like, that never goes away. I guess it's that, like, would you rather love and lose than never love at all? Like, that could be applied anywhere, you know? Would you rather know?

I guess that doesn't help. Would you rather know what this person's going to say? Yeah. And then live with that or never get that. and just be like, I don't. I don't know. I wouldn't. I would not.

No, what I would do is, what do I invest in? And he's like, clapacania. And I go, what is that? It's a startup now, right? But invest, put all your money in Slovakia. Clavacia? Like Slovakia? It's a new country.

Invest in the country. Where do I go to invest? He's like, call this person, he owns Slovakia, and they have nothing right now. But offer him this. some number and he will take it and then you're going to be a billionaire. I don't want it now. I'm just same. Investment?

Oh, investment I definitely would take. Yeah, I would insider trade this afternoon if you guys know anything. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Love to. From your future self, that'd be insane. Yeah, that's a loophole, I have to say. Yeah. But it definitely would be, that's going to be one of those.

It's like, the AI is calling my grandma right now all the time. He's like, it's genuinely like, hi, I'm Jennifer Aniston, and I am, I need some help. getting back on my feet. Yeah. Those are crazy, dude. Wait, wait. That's actually happening?

It's like, yeah, no, it's, like on Facebook right now. There's videos and it's like, you can tell it's. Was it Matt Rife? It's an overlay. Oh, yeah. Matt Rife has a woman that thinks that she's in the relationship with Matt Rife. You see that? Yeah, it's, it's concerning, but she seems super happy.

I know, I understand, but I'm going to, can I look at the woman right now if she's listening, okay? I'm friends with Matt Okay I know who he's seeing He's not seeing you Okay That's a 100% factual thing

Because I don't want you ruminating And obsessing over something that's not happening You're also giving some random person money I think that's fucking bullshit But I would want to help Jennifer Aniston back on her feet She's fine I need a thousand dollars The delivery is like

Hi, I'm Jennifer Aniston's from Friend. And it's like, okay, I believe you. It's an AI video? And it's like, I'm giving away 1,000 Apple's MacBook. And it's like, everything's like a little bit eerie. Like I can tell, but easy, no problem. If I was my grandma and I had had a glass of Franzy, a box wine. I would be like, this is my girl.

Oh, yeah. And I get, I bet that woman that you just spoke to just now is like, that is so Matt to like tell his friends to, joke with me over their pod. You know, like she's... Yeah, gonna convince herself. That's something they always mess around like that, my boys. Oh, so you think that what my message was just now

is she's still justifying it? Yeah. It's so funny, this human psychology. You mean, people are just trapped into this way of thinking and their ego will not allow them to the truth. I say this all the time. You could literally line up the most concrete receipts, have all the evidence laid out,

and you could not convince someone. Anyway, You have fun? I had so much fun. I had so much fun. Yeah. So you have a podcast. What is it called?

Brooke and Connor make a podcast. Brooke and Connor making a podcast. This is our YouTube here. Yeah. We look really... We look really cute. Why don't you guys date? Our thumbnails.

She's cute. We are so close. That's good. We're not so close to dating. We're so close. It would never... As friends. Okay.

Yeah. Very attractively. HR violation. Yeah. HR. Yeah, that is. And so you. And then how long you've been doing this?

We just figured out it's been four, we're going on five years. Wow, that's a good run. That's a really good run. We're stoked on it. It's a real cut. I've never seen our thumbnails just close. Yeah, yeah. That's great.

Broken makeup podcast. How long are they? Like an hour? Yeah, they're an hour. I like that we, I just looked at my phone a second ago, and I'm like, wow, this flew by. I can't believe we're done. Because you're with a pro. It's so fun.

I love these. Should we keep going? No, we're not going to keep back. I got to go. I have a phone call. And then I think this comes out. We still have the Funny Bone Comedy Club. Oh, Epic.

I'm shooting. And go to the Funny Bone, Tampa, and go to the Funny Bone Comedy Club in Orlando. Yep. Yeah, and go check them out. I'm shooting those for the, we're not calling it a special, because we're going to do something kind of weird,

so I'm calling it a spectacle. Yeah, to come to the spectacle. Oh, yeah. And you're doing a multiple. We're going to shoot it over a week in Florida. That's so cool. Fucking amazing. Six shows.

Yeah. Well, thank you. you guys so much. Give Connor with a run of applause, everybody.