TigerBelly - Ep 223: Michael Rosenbaum Says I Love You

Episode Date: December 4, 2019

Coldplay breaks Bobby. Michael plays Germany. Khalyla takes her memories for a jog. We talk boomer mosh pits, being present with trees, and figurative defecation.  Listen to Michael's podcast: https://insideofyoupodcast.com/episodes  https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/inside-of-you-with-michael-rosenbaum/id1256754097Support us by supporting our sponsors!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey Prime members you can listen to Tiger Belly add free on Amazon music download the app today Five four a three a two. Oh, uh, forever young. I want to be forever young That song Rings true for every man Every man wants to be forever young. Welcome to another episode of Tiger Belly I have no idea what that means, but I'm gonna tell you something right now Acai bowls are my favorite meal as of late. We have Kyla my beautiful princess and my foundation and She's forever young to me when I look at her at night man. I go. Holy shit. Is that a fanning?

Oh, yeah, yeah, I don't know how old they are. Are they young they're like What's a fanning the Cody L all the whole clan the fannings to Cody's yeah, I was younger whatever Sam L You know what I mean. Yeah, you friend. Yeah, you're like fucking Elvis. Yes, if he only had a two-dimensional Okay structure to his face. Oh, there we go We got Fuck man, you know what dude? Fuck man Jones man George pink dick forever friend. I really rely on you man for a lot And I love you so much and we got

Yeah, guys, um, I love price I love you, dude You know that but the reason why I do that treat you like this because I get intimidated by your sexuality. Oh, yeah So there's a couple of things I want to talk we have a very very special guest and He's one of my favorite people of literally of all time. I've seen his penis. I know He's he's a but I want to talk about something You guys I've you know I'm on a new show and I want to listen. The show is I don't know what it is. It's a competition show We talked about the last time. I'm with Gronkowski

Venus Williams and Ian Cart Carmel we compete in competitions and last night I did I played a goalkeeper and Coolio Mark McGrath and Macy Gray. They try to get goals, but um as you know a Year ago, I don't know when but I was a little critical of Ronda Rousey and that a little I was a little a lot of okay. Look at the I remember he said that she needs to drop her entire team and move to the mountains like Rocky She needs to go to Big Bear And you know what and you what you know what that's not that wasn't a bad advice

No, hold on. I'm second. I'm sure that collectively we all have said some things about Ronda Rousey, but not as harsh as you all right. So you really went into how I mean for all that she's done for the sport I think that she didn't deserve your mouthful about her Anyway, you're right You're absolutely correct and that's why I'm bringing imagine what Mike Bisping said imagine having a bad set at the store Imagine being beloved for let's say five six years and then having one bad way fucking worse One bad set at the store and then everyone turns on you and says you're not you're right shit That's why I'm bringing it up. You were right and I was wrong

But Monday night Ronda Rousey was on my team on the show So she comes out to me and she's just says she was she has a smile She hugged me and she goes, you know, we're cool man, right? We're gonna be good They go what I love you. I said to her She's again. No, but we heard, you know You know, I mean so Travis is there and then Travis her boyfriend is hovering over her like this And can I say something

And I talked to Whitney Cummings about it afterwards I've never worked with anyone better than her She's funny She she knows every moment without even just gut instinct. She's a performer and She's cool as fuck man. We have a guest. Yeah, I know I know I understand that we're almost 10 minutes in I already fucking told him that I would do that now and I want to react to that No, you will fuck not but I told I saw you're not a fuck night. You're you you spent the day

You scheduled the day so that you could revolve your life around this program. I really appreciate it Yeah, and George wouldn't even let me shit like oh, wow I had to take a shit and Michaels, you know that story next to Marshall's Why didn't you wait you had to pass our house? I took a shit in Marshall Michael's a fabric store. I sort of got on my mother's life. I just took a shit at Michael Why can't you see she sit here? Well, he just never texts me back in time. Oh, we have Sorry a bathroom here. It's nice. It's way better. It was you thought that we didn't have bathrooms here No, I knew you lived in a new mansion

Wow, oh, wow, that's fucking quaint. He's not like I wanted to get a crap in it. Okay good because I've been to your mansion as well Okay, oh, well, I wouldn't call this one as well. All right to show. So anyway, I I've been going through I'm gonna bring you up now. Okay. Yeah, you've never introduced me by the way I think ever on any of your shows but people come up to me go. Hey, I love John Bobby Lee show. I'm like great How about you listen to my show? No, I just look okay. Well, fuck not fuck not. That's what happens now. You're a fucking okay I'm gonna do it now Okay So honestly, I his podcast

Right is so interesting to me and that's why I've done twice, right? Yep, because it's It has you have cool friends and some celebrities and whatnot, but it's It really is a platform to it's a therapy platform for people can express themselves right in ways that they can't in other mediums and it's a really great therapeutic show and I love doing it and Honestly, dude, it's called inside you if you're not listening to it You're you also have something we are incapable you do something. We're incapable of doing You're what we're incapable of being you're refined. Yes, like when your show is well done Refined and clear we can't it's as if you went to school for broadcasting

I'm I nerd in it But you know what is the truth is yeah, and we'll get to Rhonda Rousey. Yeah, is That I Honestly, I'm gonna be honest with you. I never said this. I thought I'd do it because somebody kept telling me. Oh, you should do this You'll make money. Hmm that I'm gonna be honest. That's why I thought I was gonna do it like okay I'll make money. I'll talk to people I could talk to people and Then I for some reason started getting vulnerable and started talking to guests like you know I have this I don't know what this is but since I was a kid. I'm able to talk to people

I don't know what it is But I can bring out things that they don't normally talk about because I guess it's ignorance on my behalf I just don't I'm not trying to like interrogate them So it's it's just cool when you can sit down and normalize mental health and anxiety and like Kristen Bell has anxiety and you know She talks about her depressions. I can't believe I've never talked about my depression like this I'm like well we could stop just no. I just feel comfortable talk. So I love it. It gives me purpose I'll tell you what I love it better than acting. I love it better than any I love talking to guys like you who just open up about the death of their dad

Yeah, and you know most people like don't talk about this don't talk about this and I could sit there And have real conversations and I love doing it. So it's so funny that you say that you Michael because You know because I'm in I'm on this weird sports athletic show. I'm around a lot of people That are you know Killing it right right, but then they talk and I expressed that I'm on a podcast and this and that and they're not aware of what That really is right, but in my opinion and what I want to tell them is that oh It's something that I'd rather do than this But even though the thing that I'm doing now is the most amazing thing and I love being on that

I honestly do love being on that show game on but this podcast is changed everything yeah in my life in just in terms of waking up and being able to like talk and And and and my dad died And I'm gonna tell everyone it's been really I've dealt with it in in the worst kind of way And I I don't Know how to do it. I've never been here before and so what I did was I

Didn't grieve I held it inside. I have I've lost 20 pounds. I can't sleep Right, I can't eat yeah, he hasn't slept in two days two days even after a very grueling day on set he's incapable of Relaxing closing in his eyes and drifting into some form of like REM sleep like he just is incapable of it Yeah, I just really weird. I feel I feel lost and I and I and I I know that Being on the show that was on that I could have been better if I was as clear-headed I mean, I did good. I felt great, but I could have been much better But at the end of the day man, it's like I've never been here before I'm lost. Let me tell you something. Okay, I

Don't know everything. I don't know most things but I Talked about my podcast. I haven't talked about it in depth, but I Went to a wellness center Wasn't for drugs or alcohol. Maybe cuz I took some Xanax to go to sleep. I couldn't sleep. I was an insomniac I I was low. I had surgeries. I was in pain. That's right. You had that next yeah I had some surgeries and yeah, I had a disc that got fucked up And I just want you to know when you're in surgery. I prayed hard bra

Dude, that's what I'm doing better. I think you saved me. Thank you But you know when I went there the reason I went there people I think we're shocked. They're like what you're going to a wellness center. I Don't you're like the the leader you have gatherings and you're the funny guy you make everybody happy. You're a giver You're your party is we're the best honor. I Would run into people. Oh my god. There's Johnny. That's great. Anyway, but I just I was I was low Yeah, Bobby. I couldn't explain it other than if there was a scale from one to ten on how you feel. I To was pushing it. I just go I just don't like enough. I love myself. I don't feel like I really am enjoying anything I feel like I'm going through the motions of life. Yeah

And I'm doing all these great things. I'm so lucky like and that's by the way What you don't realize until you go through these things where people are talking to you like I'm 21 days in and I'm having a Pit I remember 10 10 days in yeah, I might call the psychiatrist could call somebody that get them over here I'm flipping out. I can't I was like emotional. I was like it's about getting Everything off your chest. It's about when you just said, I don't know if I was good enough. I wanted to be great It's about just you are good enough. I know it sounds funny But the more you fucking just say I don't have you can't be perfect. You will never be perfect I don't give a shit who you are. You're not perfect

You're not I know so if just be good enough Yeah, go out there and you might you you're not your work Bobby you go out and you give your best and when that day is over You go home. This is not something I learned like day one. All right. Thanks. I'll take the next 20 days I saved my money. Yeah, it's funny that you say that because when you say work, right? Remember like when we first came into town We started work that used to fix me Because you would you when you would get a job like you know when I got I remember getting the dictator Getting the call because I did the table read but they had called me and said you don't have the part

But that was basically my audition But I remember going oh, they didn't do anything for my career, but still the call fixed me for a month You know, you wake up and you go, oh, you know, I'm gonna kill it right so you're getting your your your it doesn't work anymore It catches up to you as you get older work. Oh, I feel great It's it dude. That's exactly what it is unless you have unless you have like you feel real love unless you're You know, it's very hard to differentiate between Insta like gratification from other people like acceptance like attention and love like people like you're great You're great. You're great and it fills you up and it feels like oh this feels great. Yeah, but what happens

It's you're like a fucking colander, you know what you put spaghetti in it just goes right out and it's gone You're like wait a minute. Why do I feel empty because you have to feel good about yourself You have to love yourself and know that no matter how much shit you've caused other people or you don't like yourself or all the things You've done away. You have to love yourself. I I this is funny. You'll love this finally the first funny thing Go ahead. Is it aggressive? I'm not gonna point My my therapist is what do you do when you wake up anxiety? What do you do? I don't what do you mean what I do? Well, what do you do? I lie there?

And I think you're the most put together over the years. Yeah, no, oh god. That's what everybody thinks you put together. So So she goes you wake up and you have anxiety. Yeah, what do you do about it? I lie there You lie there and what do you think's gonna happen? No, that's a little go away does it know So what are you doing? Here's what I want you to do I want you to get the fuck up immediately unless you're exhausted and you got to go back to sleep Immediately anytime you starting to think about things get out of bed Then what do I do? I'm like a child. I don't know what to do

I want you to go up go get some water drink some water some lemon water something healthy Just drink some water go take a piss. Okay. I don't want you to look in the mirror I know this sounds fucking stupid and it will sound stupid when I say it right now. Yeah, and it sounded stupid look in the mirror And she said this to me. Oh, she's say, I love you. I go. Ah, come on. I love you really Oh, it's one of this stupid Just just do it Yeah

And then I want you to just go back and try to meditate for five or ten minutes where you just breathe and listen to a guided meditation My a sponsor told me to do that. I'm telling you for years for years I was like fuck you fuck you just like everybody listening. Oh, we don't need that we need laughter and still Try just be in present for a fucking minute, man. Try being present So what I would do as I woke up and I remember the first day I looked in the mirror Bobby I was too cool for my own self, man. I looked in the mirror and I go love you Nobody around yeah, love you. Yeah, and then about bye bye day eight and I was meditating stuff I was like, you know, I give this a fucking shot. Just I

Looked in the mirror. I love you man. You know what and I go, you know what you got flaws, man You're a fuck up. You've let people down. You've let girls know what you're a good person You help people you give the charity. You're a good guy, man. I love you, man. I love you I don't went back to bed and I meditated and I got up to go walk 15 days in a wellness center They were saying try to be present try to go outside and just be present I'm just like you. I know and many people out there every day walk. I go. Oh look. There's a tree I'm present. Yeah, hey tree. I was like sandler. Oh, yeah, and all of a sudden date I don't know what it was. I woke up did my routine love you all that shit little things and I'll get to that I

took a walk and I just noticed I just like oh man, that's so cool. I had a little stream right there. That's really cool How they did that? How they do that's beautiful right there. That's really me and I I didn't I wasn't aware of what I was doing I was just actually just being in the moment. Yeah, I was listening to I was just It's my surroundings and being present and I started getting emotional. I go. Oh my god This is what it is. It's just about not thinking about your fucking self Not thinking about all these things that you need to you think you need to be that people need you to be and Because who gives a fuck Bobby? We're gonna die and then what happens when we die. I don't know. That's the issue

Bobby all you have are your memories and your moments with your friends and your family and your life because the thing is is though Mikey Can I call you that you can call it? Ever you want fuck not whatever the thing is is did I get too deep for this show? Throw it in to I'm gonna make it even deeper and darker in a second, but go you go ahead make it darker You're thinking about when you said all you have are your memories So this is what kept me paralyzed on Sunday in bed We were supposed to record this podcast and I called George. I told Bobby. I was like we can't record today I physically could not remove myself out of bed. Oh my god because of the idea of memories in my head

My biggest fear is vanishing memories Whatever happened to me when I was 11 Let's say on a Tuesday when I was 14 was a clear memory once upon a time Now I don't remember a lot of things in my childhood and it it spirals me into this idea that Memories are really not all you have because they morph and then they fade and eventually all that will become in the forefront of our thoughts are within the last couple of years and I just started crying thinking that my childhood memories were vanishing and Never are they morphed. Maybe they're not as true as I as the little things

I remember and I couldn't get out of bed because of that Michael is not crazy My grandfather is I just say he he's like my best friend. He's been he's had Alzheimer's talk about memory Yeah, the one thing that and by the way, he was just put in a hospice So I'm gonna get a call any moment that you know that I have to fly out So but I was it was important for me to keep busy and do all these things like your podcast I wanted to do it and like last night I played at the rock scene. I was like, I know my grandfather I know him. I know he'd be like, what are you doing? Why do you need? I'm this is it I've been dying of all sums. I can hear his voice like I want you to be happy. I love you. I can hear it

I know it. No one can tell you that and With the memories you have I don't mean like you have to remember everything But he even with Alzheimer's he would talk about I have an interview with him. I forgot I interviewed my grandfather. I said what um You're happiest because you know my childhood, you know my happiest moments were playing with my friends I remember sir as a 92 year old man or he remembers it. You remember the fun things You remember the great things. There's so many that you don't even know that you're thinking. Oh my god I can't remember this you do and it's it's deeper and sometimes you have to feel it more and

Even moments from an hour ago or a week ago. That's still a memory memories are always just following you That's the way I think so I don't I wouldn't get caught up so much in like you well with the solution to my problem After when I did finally get out of bed after my paralysis for a couple hours was I decided that Whatever I had now in my bank that I would just jog it that I would just jog those memories over and over again and write them Down and repeat them to people so that they that synapse is reinforced and that that that that memory stay stronger in My bank because there are certain moments

I try to recall where I was able to tell stories to tell a to tell a story of a particular instance very clearly now I'm not able to where I'm like wow. It's just going away. Do you remember meeting the moment you met Bobby? Yeah, but how many years ago was that six years ago six years ago, but when he the way he tells it Changes the way I tell it changes and that scares me because I'm like wow. I need to either need to jog it drastically different It's not drastically because the thing is it's like the affair. You have you seen that show cover his story and her story and There's by the way I'm so angry with my parents because they both tell me the complete opposite stories of how they met and now you guys are Telling me that this is normal. Yeah, what?

Yeah, but you know what if that's what's been going on throughout mankind Nothing is real. I don't think anything is Right Well, Brian Kellen was here last week. He says this is basically all a simulation and we should What's your Rhonda thing what's your Rhonda thing? Oh, yeah I will but I want to say one more thing. Okay. I want to say the number one thing of all this shit I was talking about however deep it was. I don't you know, it's it was deep The the wellness of the one thing it taught me that I just think that you would benefit from this

Yeah, well, I'm going Saturday. I already told you that is routine Chains, you know, 20 days. I was there for I didn't realize 21 days. It takes to break a habit But what happens? It's probably 21 days to create a new habit. So what happens was I started going I'm not meditating Oh, I'm now Taking a hike in my schedule that I will not Doing healthy things that are on my schedule that I do not say that I say no, I'm not gonna do that today I don't feel like it. You don't have a choice yet and the more you do it the more you incorporate these good things Then it becomes a habit and you feel bad when you don't do it

It's the same thing. It's the worst kind of addiction when you have all these bad habits because you don't know how to get rid of it If you have your alcoholic, okay, I just got to stop drinking. Yeah, but if you're like you have all these emotions and all these things Anyway, I'm not gonna talk about Rhonda Rousey Yeah, yeah, let's go back to Rhonda. You said something about like she was really professional that she didn't kill me Know what I'm saying is is that we talked we did games we laughed you like her I love her. Do you think you do that with a lot of people you think we all have a sort of a propensity for like Being judgmental and then all of a sudden we meet them. Oh, hey, yeah, it's easy to just hate isn't it? It's easy to just judge it's easy to write and then when we meet somebody we're normal like maybe I was wrong

Yeah, when somebody says hey, I met so-and-so that guy's an asshole. He's a subreddit. You know what? Maybe he's having a bad day. Maybe his grandfather's in a hospice. Yeah off. Here's a memory that didn't vanish I remember we were at by Chloe's which is the vegan place 365 delicious, and you yelled turn this shit off, and it was a sugary wait at the whole foods 360 That song. Oh, yeah, I remember that song with that. I don't know what song it was. Yeah, wherever it's playing I always yell that is a memory that will never leave. You know what else if I hear that song closing time Am I Sonic yeah, yeah, but it's a good song. Yeah, it's a bad song Oh, is it you hear it so much it makes you nauseous does like if I list my one of my favorite album

is Pixies do little me too, but I can't listen to it because I listen to it so much Wait, were you there on time to see the pixies before the cure? Yes. I saw the whole set. Yeah, I thought it was good But it without Kim deal. I'm not supporting why Because I'll tell you why Will you ask me can I answer you? You filthy fuck I'll be easy because other but you know, no, you don't be easy. I'm fucking filthy Joe. Oh

Just for that lift up the shirt of my podcast right there. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Show them what I got you there That's that's my face. I have a inside you Michael Rosenbaugh t-shirt, and I'm gonna wear it on stage Are you well not you know this year? Oh What year just stress I want this to be more. You know mean like a what is that? You don't know my girl like you know me. Oh, no. No, they won't sure. Yeah. No, I want them to know. I appreciate them That's nice. I love you so much. I love you, too I also want to say a statement and you can comment if you want But you would you didn't finish his question about the pixies do little why no Kim deal?

Why won't you listen to them? Oh, yeah, good call Koala fuck that could have gone and listen to okay? I got my hat somebody Now it's going Koala. Fuck. We didn't want to hear Imagine the Beatles being all alive and and the Beatles are playing and Paul's is not in it Frank black compared to the it's like John Lennon and the rest of Ringo Starr. That's not true Kim deal and the breeders. They're great. They had two songs. Oh, yeah, seven songs. I really like okay I think that she's a creative powerhouse. I think she's amazing, too I really do think she's amazing, but I you know to me Frank black and Joe. He's a legend. Oh, man guitar It's like that guitar and that unique voice and those words that it's like

I'm right on this. Oh, you're totally right. Come on. I got caught in a A boomer mosh pit with older men with cargo shorts fighting around me when I went to go see the pixies Really? Yeah, it was frightening. Put your fucking phone down And the guy's like make me motherfucker I would have and I was there with like my 16 year old knees. Yeah. Yeah, because we were waiting for the cure I mean, I love the pixies, but she wasn't there for the pixie. She wanted to go see the cure and yeah I was caught in a in a A fight with a bunch of boomers sounds to me like I don't know if you guys listening, but a lot of memories here. I had one bad day

You smoked a little too much grass. I couldn't remember shit. So you go. Where's my we do that all the time There's sometimes where I can't remember my best friend's names. That's not like, you know If you just can't do it after a couple of days, it was a panic attack I think that's what it was because sometimes I go in grocery stores if the lights are a little too bright I have this fear that I'm gonna forget who I am and then I pull out my phone then I have this I'm frozen. I think I have I have this fear that I'm not gonna remember who to call. Do you guys get that kind of Yes, I get I get some weird shit grocery store lights really by the way, I'm gonna go back 18 minutes It's probably 18 minutes. Yep. You're about right. Yeah, do you know? I was just thinking about what you said

I couldn't get out of my head as we were talking with the water. You said Hey, it was about, you know, it's sort of insatiable. It's like, you know, you know, I just whatever it was What I just think you're yourself believe it or not when you're here when you're with these guys You have the most fun with Kalilah just talking to people You're like me on my podcast when I put these things on I'm actually somewhat focused you and I have such bad ADD We can't keep our fucking mind So look we're forced to and we engage and we find out so many cool things, okay? We help people. Okay. It helps me. All right. Okay. That's what you're gonna. Okay. When I was staring at you when you well

You when I was staring at you. Yeah, you think I was trying to connect with you. I thought that no My eyesight. Oh, I was just thinking about all these other things like like baby Yoda is life. That's embarrassing By the way. Yeah, Mandalorian. I finished it I'm not gonna say anything Don't know you I know you you're gonna go but and then I know but would you kill your dogs to have a baby Yoda? Interesting Irvin Blanche no way. I don't know he's hesitated thinking a lot because I was thinking you gave something away like there's No, no, no, no, I'm not giving you an answer. No, I think that don't do it. Yeah, don't oh by the way

Can I read something? Let me just finish with the baby Yoda fucking bullshit, man Okay, so angry about this baby Yoda bullshit. Yeah, what I finally did research. I watched the fucking thing man I want to talk about it for a second man only episode two. Yeah, I'm not gonna talk about the spoilers It's there's only three episodes. Fuck not. That's it. Yeah, the fourth one comes out Friday They're better than all the Star Wars movies except for the first three. I know and also It's the when you watch it the last Jedi is an abomination Not good in terms of pacing in terms of laying true to this the the world that The job was in episode two. I'm like, why can they just be in this world? Yes, it feels tangible

Yeah, it feels real. Yeah job was the fucking Space crawler with the fuck's it called the sand crawler. Yeah, it opens. I'm like, oh my god I had that toy. I feel like a kid again, and it's dark. Yeah, so Fuck off and and and the gel was look better. Oh my god. The eyes look clear. They didn't say they didn't say they're famous Maybe that word is like a bad word. Yeah, and because this is later, right? After right it's like the meat to move it. You can't yeah, maybe it's like Midget or faggot Yeah

Right and they got woke right the job was got woke. Yeah, and so yeah I think oh my god. Hey, by the way, my friend text me this guy randomly. He doesn't he didn't know I was gonna be in your show This was yesterday. I Goes dude I did a random deep dive into your episodes your podcast and listen to you and Bobby Lee today on my way back to work dying Fucking dying. You hear that? That's me Bobby Lee. Yeah, that's a helicopter Bobby I know it's a helicopter fuck face. I live on planet Earth Wow, thank you for that. Yeah, because that did nothing for me

Who's your friend that is a Tom Hardy or somebody? I don't know Tom. I'm hard. Oh Did you ever see warrior? That's a great movie. I love Oh, yeah, nobody saw it. I love I saw it. I just said it. We saw I know and I said nobody Yeah, you knew it was in a Callan. Callan was your friend's gonna tell him was in it. Yeah, Callan was in the Joker Really, you know, you see a joke. I love the Joker. You saw it. So there's a scene You heard him you didn't really see him. You don't see him. You see a little you see literally this much of them, right? You know, we're split second. Yeah, cuz I know his voice I hear it's like in the background and I see this much of his face and that's all he had

But in that second Oscar In that moment in that moment Oscar, bro the acting from this side of his is unbelievable fucking blue Have you ever been in a movie where you think you're gonna be a lot in it a lot and then no, oh, yeah I've been cut out of complete movies Paul And you probably are crushed. I played a valet. I thought it was funny But then they they I was in the director's cut or whatever But in the theatrical, I remember going to the movie And then go and then remember. Oh, this is and then you're not in it and I just left

Have you ever been in a movie where you cut out and you're like, oh, thank God. Oh Yeah, or I've been in movies that you wanted me cut out. No No, just check this out. There's a guy on the mic and there's a guy named Dante. I'm gonna say it We talked about it earlier. I would say real quick. Okay. There's a comic named Dante. Mm-hmm. He calls me He goes, dude, I'm a director now Which is cool. Yeah, if you call me when you said you did music, right? Yeah, I don't question it I watch it. I think you're very talented. I really think I think in another life You could I don't see you could have been a musician. Maybe no one hundred percent. I love you

If you focused your attention, I think you could have done it. Thank you white. He's doing it now. I'm old though Be honest. I'm 47. Where am I going? I'm going to one tour Why the fuck not? I don't even know what I was talking about You're making me mad. I didn't start it. All right So don't think I'm a director. I'm fine. He goes. I want you to be my movie. He's doing a movie and I go, I can't It's just one day. I just I don't come on. I want to do it, right? But then he you know, we're old friends. I got dude. All right. I'll do one day one scene That's it. I show up. I do one scene. I leave. I don't sign anything

The next thing I know I see posters of me and Jamie Kennedy in the front of the poster Saying bro, what happened? That's what the movie is called Starring me and Jamie Kennedy starring. Yeah, and I am in one scene And I got paid nothing The movie making any money. No, but he used your name. He didn't ask you but Chelsea Peretti. I remember Her texting me with bro. What happened poster and she goes bro. What happened and she did like nine question marks and the rage I'm dude, honestly

If you did one scene in a movie and they made it and seemed like you were the lead of the movie to sell the movie And you got no money. Would you get angry? Yeah, yeah, what would you do that does nothing you can do. Yeah, there's you could probably Kick your friends ass. Have your friends ass kicked sue him. Go and put graffiti all over the posters Say on Twitter and Instagram say this is a fucking hoax. Oh, all right. I have three lines. What did I do? I did nothing Just disrespect you obviously wasn't your friend. No, he is he was still no, he's not well I mean, I get don't forgive that Yeah, that's really like exploitative. I think that's wrong. Oh, that's why you have to always be careful. He was like, hey

Just just one little thing Yeah, make sure there's a lot bigger names and usually there are I would get on my knees often What and beg him not to do these like he would he had a when I first met him He had a really hard time saying no and he would just do these really dumb dumb dumb. Oh my god No, YouTube videos with people and I wouldn't get a YouTube. That's how where I was in my career And I was and I didn't get you that YouTube video Funny or die. Oh my god devastating

That's where I was before I met her I Was on a series two series and I got to the point where what I can't get into uh Just kidding films But over there in Alhambra. Oh, by the way, by the way, that's great company. I love them. That's a great group. That's that's a wrong example No, I would say I would just give me an example, but you know, you think that's oh, that's what we're talking about I know that like you're talking about you're talking about all these things that it always this meant so much I need this I need people to see me. I need to be great. I need to be famous

I need to be all these things and Hopefully if you're lucky find out one day like who gives a shit I really who gives a shit. That's where I'm at and that's right. That's where I know what hopefully after all this and I know it Yeah, you're gonna come out of it stronger. You're gonna give me a hug You're gonna fucking love life. You're gonna start doing things you never did before because I mean how many meditate I don't care what you do as long as it's healthy and it's good for you You know and you and you appreciate you how talented you are how far I was a challenge How much of a good person a big heart you are it's hard for us to be uh, what's the word?

Intimate yep, that's it. You don't know that word. Well, I could come up with okay I think you should tell me the way we should do it. Hey guys, I think we should do a calm We've always talked about it. We should do a comedy together. I mean, I know we did a comedy But I was it really well I mean you did do I said it was a you did director movie. I wasn't in it What do you mean? Oh, yeah back in the day Well, here's the thing it was based on the characters like there was a black guy There was I'm kidding. I know if there was an Asian guy I was totally fucking in fact that guy should have I it doesn't matter if it doesn't happen. I would have had a major

Fuck is it too late? You get it him man. No, but it's true Michael I don't have to give me anything. I love you bro. I don't give no, but I want to work with you I think you're fucking so hilarious and I just feel like your personality gets mine Where you just going crazy and we just Well, I mean I did pitch to um Brian Callan delia to do we should come up with um and St. Andrew Santino a Movie that's kind of with podcasters in it an ensemble movie and see if we can just make a really funny kind of a catty-shacky

ensemble very kind of R rated movie and see if we could sell it via our These platforms like fire in the kid, you know, yeah, and um But maybe that'll happen one day, you know, Delia talented fucker really nice woman. I met him never came on the podcast and After you called him. He says I'm in All right. Yeah, email me supposed to be there that day. Hey, where are didn't show up nothing Week later said hey, man. Can we reschedule? Yeah, man. How about tomorrow? Great nothing? Well on three times or something. I was just like what the fuck your dad does that's weird

It doesn't sound like him at all. It's just weird. It just doesn't make sense You know did Theo's show and Chris was great. I was he was so nice to me when I met him I saw I was a little hurt, but I was like, it's not I think there's something cuz he he's really reliable I'm just saying it. It was personal. I don't think it's personal. I think that it was a loof. Oh my god Sorry for that. Did you? Yeah, I thought that was your chair, bro That was a chair. I'm not saying I love the guy. He's a nice guy brilliant comedian. I'm just saying I love what we're doing I don't know what happened. You that's great. What are you doing that? Yeah, he's gonna do it now No, he won't it's okay. If he doesn't reverse cycle. I love it. I think I swear to God

I'm just saying the Jews created it. I'm just saying I love the guys town. I just was wondering why you come Theo came on you come on Swartz and comes on Holland comes on All right, how many names Jim or Jeffries came on and a ferris which shows My inside of you with Michael Rose and a ferris. Did you do it? She is coming on because did you do hers? I did not I did hers. Yeah, I thought I did a pretty good job Do you think you think she liked you? I don't know, but you know what start thinking like this No, I don't know if I liked her. No No, no, no, think like that. I love I've done. I love her. She's great. He is great

Yeah, she's like I'm part with Rhonda Rossi and she's hilarious. Yeah, best friends Look at what I just did because she didn't kill him. No, that's not what it is. I and Rhonda if you're listening Please do my podcast. I think we wait. Hold on. Hey, she really does deserve a longer period of groveling from us though Sure, the way we talked about her. We really should Because now I Don't give a fuck I will fight for her. Yeah to the end of time I'm not kidding. I think you guys think that I'm because of my dad's death that had some sort of psychological change Yeah, I did I know it did

I But there's still you know, I mean Yeah, no, but just this section of my head the amount of screen time The Callan got on the joke right is the amount right of clear information that I have right so that's real Okay friend. Yeah, man. I love you. I really love you too. I love you, but I love you all you guys play Germany, right? That was good. We talk about that already. You know, it's Uh, my my band, you know, it's just look it's it's photos. Yeah We went to Germany for a week and we played for a couple nights and then we just played at the Roxy

Dude, here's the reality is we're not ever gonna be a big band. It's not and we're not intended to do that This is like I always thought this it was fear. This is another thing. Everything was always fear for me if You know, I'm gonna fail. I'm gonna look like an idiot They're gonna say and I don't have a voice like Adam Lambert. Why should I do this and I go finally I got to the bottom I go Cuz you love it and you makes you feel good and you enjoy it and you like being with your friends Why else why should anything else matter Michael? So that's why I do it So last night was fun and it was I didn't feel like oh my god

Another 10 people are gonna buy my $10 album or download. I didn't think that I just enjoy website Do they get it at all? They want one. I mean if they really want merch or anything they can go on my But no, I don't I really don't like you know, it's we have great fans Michael. Well, I'm being honest here Mikey Yeah, Bobby's trying to launch his own music career. Hold on, babe. I know I remember we talked about this before I Asked you one time Did you stand up comedy at the Irvine improv? He did and you did every show with me, right? I did two shows or whatever not every but you did to you mean that night. Yeah. Yeah, it was packed Yep, first time you've ever really done it. Yeah

Who no one does that? No one you can't go up to anybody, you know, Jay Rod Jay Hernandez from Magnum PI. Yeah, you know, I do that. So I love Jay It's very funny by the way, and I love him nice guy very talented, but he's funny, right? But I just jokingly go you should open for me at the Irvine improv and he you could feel him go Oh, you're mean you didn't have that. I know I know but you but you did it. I didn't I can't that's rare Yeah, it's it's the most intimidating thing. I'll tell you music could be intimidating

Yeah, but to go up on stage with no band behind you. Yeah to go up on stage and Not only that I wouldn't have been as nervous if I was you Yeah, or you exactly but the fact that oh, I'm around all these other big comedians like Callan and Delia and all these big guys who have careers and specials and making money and podcasts that get millions of followers and all of a sudden I'm like going Look at this. I'm thinking they're thinking thinking about them. Look at this fucking actor. Yeah, he's an actor He's gonna always gonna be he's gonna be a comedian now go ahead go ahead even though they're cool and they're nice I'm going I gotta be great. I put so much pressure on myself to be great

You can't be I can't go after Joe Rogan and kill it I can't I could only do as good as I can do so I put so much pressure on myself Bobby I it's hard to get that out of my head. It's it's a very hard to start when you're also I think that other comics would appreciate that that is in your head that you're not some delusional guy who thinks they can do What they've been doing for so long and I think that makes you grounded and a lot more Likeable actually that compared to someone who thinks like yeah, I could just go ahead and do what those guys do Yeah, and I'm not saying I I should care. Yeah, gosh go ahead You're not entitled by the way, that's what we mean. That's what yeah

You know, you know, I think that comes on that's very clear to everybody. Okay, good Yeah, right and so It's it's it's the same as me doing stand-up for you know, I started doing stand-up and then one day they go you have to act and I went into Yeah, I went to Meisner technique, you know classes and I I did no, I just the way you said go I went to Meisner. Yeah, you look with their whole roof for a year, you know, yeah years sure and I did the repetitions and I did One-on-one sessions and I worked. What's a funny vocal warm-ups? No, I would go in and see Laura, you know my my teacher and my coach or whatever you call them, you know

You're sad, right? But my point is is that all those things that you're thinking about other people thinking about you is what all comics feel about everyone Even when you start that's always in our head. You don't think that I think that was about that guy. Yeah, right? So my poor they know right like Joe. I haven't been on Joe Rogan's podcast in six years That's crazy and everyone's everyone every day Goes how come Cheeto does it once a month? How come all these people? I don't know. Maybe he likes him better I don't know. I know that when I see Joe He's so happy to see me hugs me. He kisses me. So he's the nicest guy in the world. I love him, right?

I don't know what that is, but It's just what it is. It is what it is. Isn't that something that we do? I think like that too. I get caught up in stuff of where, you know, my friend Dax He's a close friend of my closest never heard of him. He's got it. So he was on my podcast I know and I love him and I respect him and I think he's beautiful He's I really truly like one of my favorite people on the planet and I got caught up in a little bit of a Envy or maybe jealousy or what happened was he came on my podcast and he loved it so much

he'll tell you he decided to have his own podcast and Then he asked me if I could use my engineer because Rob. It's great. Mm-hmm. So Rob went over there and helped him and The next thing, you know, I had to let Rob go, you know, we well because I know why I left no well because You know Dax started like I mean talk about numbers. I mean, he's probably I don't know how I'm not He's number one number one top top. I've got to have 600,000 so I don't even know no one's told me 700,000 listen Don't be jealous George. Don't whatever it is. It's his eyes. Whatever it is. And so You know, it was you know, and then I told Rob, I go look Rob

I feel like there's resentment coming on here like I feel like you're not giving me enough time But you're not making any money over here. You're making a living over there. You have a family You have to go over there. Yeah, just stay full-time over there. I totally get it. I'll figure it out I don't know what the fuck I'm doing, but I'll figure it out. Yeah, wait. Okay. This is the evolution and I figure it out You know we need to get because I've always wondered this Did you know him before you met him at Bobby's show? Who Rob? No, okay? So here's where it the evolution of Rob gets interesting this guy Rob He was a craft. I love him

He's he's he was a photographer at a tiny show at UCB that Bobby did with Chris Wattaski It was from that show and then so he was a stage and he said Kalyla I hear Bobby is performing at Irvine improv Um, can you put me on the list? So we put him on the list It just so happens that you were doing your first set ever that weekend you met Rob You started a podcast with him. You know what what the first thing that comes to mind is I wouldn't have had a podcast It wasn't for Rob. He pushed me to have a podcast. I love him. I love what I do I found purpose inadvertently kind of coincidentally through him and no hard feelings. We still talk. I love him

He's doing that. He's making a great living. Dax is killing it. I think sometimes I go like you said with Chia cheetah Cheeto, what's his name Cheeto Andrews Andrew Santino, right? You're like why are some of these people always? Joe Rogan show, I don't know. I just yeah And so I started thinking wow I haven't been on Dax's show and then months and months past and then he does these live shows where he goes to another state They just do a live show. Yeah, so I finally asked me and he asked me to do his live show. Yeah, and in my heart I go I'm not good enough or a big enough celebrity to be on his regular show and the response that response was you're just great live

You have that energy. Yeah, we killed it and I understand I get it But I was like in my head. I'm like fuck man. I just felt they're so similar. We're so I just felt like I love you Dax, thank you for having me on your show But like and I want to be like dude. Just can't you just fucking do a tweet. Can't you do an Instagram? Tell your listeners. This is a great fucking podcast for mental health. Just listen to this guy Michael They're gonna come. No, no, I'm not saying that I'm saying, but this is how I start to feel Yeah, I stopped myself. Okay, and then I go Dax put me in hit and run

Dax put me, you know, he always looks after me. I know that Dax is a great friend Dax calls me out on shit. Dax would be there if I need him. Dax is there if I need him This isn't about that for this is it all in my head. Whatever this is. It's in my head So it's not Dax's fault. It's not Joe's fault. Joe doesn't love you any less. Joe just for whatever reason It's schedule. I don't whatever when you become a bigger celebrity. Joe will have you When I start my star meter yeah gets to 10 can I know what's through it is true? I heard a rumor that like Sam and I love samer Sam would like look at Stop me the guy said star meter is not even like in the top ten

I don't know. Yeah, you can buy star meter. Maybe it wasn't so you can't buy stuff. What the fuck is that? There's some young actors that do that's they get revved. Oh girl. How low can you buy it? What if you buy number one? What I was getting Rob by the way, it's not that he was crafty George Kimmel is number one on Star meter. I wasn't saying anything bad about Rob. I was simply saying it's so cool how life works I don't think you are little instances of meeting people backstage turn into him now being Dax's guy I'm gonna tell him and by the way Smart as shit knows his stuff. He's cocky as fuck and I got George Kimmel's friend I used to get so pissed off with Rob because he was be like, no, we're doing this

I go, dude, you fucking I get arguments with them. I go. I never get in arguments ever Yeah, with any of the people I work with all of them. There's so easy, but he'd be like he's so I love him But he isn't he's so smart and he perseveres and look at him and he deserves all that we but there was moments I'm like, dude shut the fuck up. It's my fucking show It's so funny cuz whenever you're bringing that guy's fate I have to sneeze Have you ever seen this before sneezing? Don't touch my shirt. I gave you please it comes out Why did you do it in your hand like this? Oh? It comes out is no sick. No

That's just how he sneezes when you bring up to his name It makes me so angry who's Dax Because he why I I'll never do his podcast either But in the in my head because he has the number one podcast I want to do it you think so you think the number one The reason why I was never asked is because he doesn't like me so much podcasting beef I was in a way. I know but that goes in my head when you say it. Well, you know what it is It's just like I'm fucking like an open book. I'm like, hey come on the show whatever Yeah, I get you know and sometimes I I have to fight for my shit like Theo who I love

Theo and I do the Ronald McDonald house every Tuesday. I I heard like I want to get involved in children's charity So I call somebody goes. Well, yeah, I think Theo do I go Theo yeah doesn't so email Theo and I've been in his show He's been my show and I caught Theo and goes yeah, I do it Tuesday nights man. Come out brother. Yeah Well, and so I've been doing it. I love Theo. What is it? It's the Ronald McDonald house I have I have movie night like every other Tuesday night. So I go for three hours. I want to do it Popcorn, I love you. The kids are amazing. I want to do it. Yeah, I want to get I want to do you'd love it It's great. You can totally do it with me. So there was a moment where I'm like, you know I'm like that where I'm like, hey, you know

I was on your podcast and I got a ton of hits and I talked about something like I talked about I think the Allison Mack shit with the small oh, yeah, oh, yeah And it got like a million hits and all this stuff all tons it and I was like then he came on my show and a week passed I go, hey, could you could you post something? Could you say you were on my show and And then they know another week. I did it like two times. I was like, no, I'm gonna fucking he's gonna post something He's gonna fucking post something And finally he goes, dude, you're fucking in my ass or something. I go and I'm gonna keep being in your ass Yeah, fucking post it you lazy fuck. Yeah, and he posted it

But that's like hold on now. I want to now that you mentioned that we did your show recently. Yeah, and I know the Bobby's terrible But do you do you forgive him or do you have resentments when when he doesn't post? You know, I don't I don't have I'm here. I don't have resentments, but like sometimes I think God I always fucking post Michael anyway He doesn't post their own show Our merch when we got not time That's too unhealthy, you know, and I love it. I don't care. Look, there's some people in the world that you just go I I get it. I'll always get you. I'll always love you. I want to see you on top

I want to see you just love yourself and said I want to see my me love me. I want your memory to be great Thank you I want us to just be happy and to be happy you have to love yourself. So that's what we're trying. I aside from being silly Because I know I mean I just want to I just need to Get better. I have to get out of where I'm at. You have to want to I do want to and you have to want to make those changes My dude, I got a fucking therapist. I go every week. I Decided to go to this into institution. It's not an institution

It's an institution We call it a wellness center and you get well, I'm gonna call an institution. It's like a federal building This doesn't sound right. Yeah, it's fine. Um, and I'm doing all these things. Why why would I do it? I'm not doing it for peer pressure I'm doing it because I'm I need to get out I have to I can't live in the spiritual rape That I have do you know, do you know what I think what I think? It's very simple. It's cliche, but it's very very easy if you think about it

You're grieving so hard and your loss is so real But honestly if you take a second and just go is this what my father would want me to be doing falling apart Is that what he wants me to do? Is that his legacy? Is that what like my grandfather who's in a hospice who's gonna die any second right now? He's my best friend. You know what last night. I'm up on stage. I'm thinking the whole time And I'm like Irv would be fucking front row Smiling and that's my Michael. No, but he wants to see don't get me emotional. I'm not gonna go there right now I've been so emotional lately. It's just been crazy. I was crying in front of my assistant. I never cried before I wrote a letter

to my grandfather Because I know there's only gonna be me and maybe my uncle who are gonna give a speech So I I made a it took me eight hours to make this video of all these moments of earth where he's fucking hilarious If you saw this I have it on my video. It's hilarious. Yeah, he is. That's where I get my comedy from Yeah, I mean if you think I'm fine and then I wrote this letter and I just I just started writing I just started writing my feelings. I didn't think about oh, what am I gonna write about? Let me make you sound smart and I just remember I put I'm lucky and I started going I'm lucky to have a grandfather This you know that for 47 years. I'm lucky to have and I started going on and I wrote it out

And I didn't even edit it and I go hey Jess. Can I read this to you thinking I'm fine? I Have a letter and I just sit there. I go blah blah and And I go and I'm lucky that I have a grandfather who just really That just really gets a kick out of me, you know just gets a kick out of me That really likes me just likes me for me see it get me a little emotional you fuck and I just lost it and I put my head down on the on the dresser because I did not want to see her and I was I just went fuck I'm sorry. She's no she's I look up. She's hysterical and

Then it happened again. I mean it happened over and over and you have to just let things go You have to be able to just If you just don't show any emotion It's like you're not living man. You just got a this is what it is what who cares somebody sees you cry It's like this is how I feel. I love this man. I wear it on my shoulder. This is who I am. You love your father He knows that so you don't have to suffer anymore to let the world know that or let yourself know that more importantly Well, it's a Coldplay song that broke him What's cold play but there's a song called daddy and the newest album

Coldplay is one of those bands Even if I don't like the album because they think just after they get to it after parachutes Whatever the first album whether it was called. Yeah, yeah Yeah, and then the second it was second was great, but it's got kind of teaser and teaser But this album is great. Can I am Matt? Can I say I have a feeling of what maybe I'd never heard it Yeah, yeah, but if it's a cold play, there's a sound like That's about it's kind of it's like it's like this Yeah, it's like the algorithm

Yeah You know me that kind of oh, I can see that But then there's a he reverbs his voice for the chorus He goes in the course is daddy you're so far away, but it echoes echoes into like space I'm gonna cry and when you're laying there like this I know Everything gets you every moment do the fucking unhelpful advice I'll help advised with Bobby Kalilah and Michael Rosenbaum

That voice gets me every time every time recently I found out my best friend for the past six years has been using meth for a few months She disappeared for four days and I now know she's back and refusing to get help and won't talk to me I've started grieving this friendship. I've been sober for six years and know you can't make someone get help They don't want it. How can I move on and forget the last six years and put this to rest without fucking up my own mental health? I didn't want to give up on her, but I feel like I'm living through all these lies I don't know her anymore. Thanks a the quickest way

For her to get help is to reach the bottom and When people enable people It helped like you know a lot of comics I see a lot of comics that are headliners that make a lot of money That are full-blown drug addicts and alcoholics that do it 24 hours a day And they have people like their agents and managers booking them road dates And what they should be doing is hey, we're not gonna rep you until you get sober Right. No, they have to make all their money. I know right. It's gross as long as their clown makes some money Who gives a shit right? Oh, and that's their mentality, right? So

What I'm saying to this person is is that you know by being sober for six years that that she Also meth in a good way You hit bottoms really quickly with crack ice Matt those types of things So there's a person who it's not your responsibility To wait for them to hit rock bottom and keep enabling like Bobby said, I mean if you've done all your can you've acknowledged it I want to get you help can I get you help and if they keep saying no you stay away from them like that's just a What can you do at this point? Yeah, I see all that because I watched that show intervention or I used to yeah I mean you watch these these people are getting tortured keeping these people around and giving them money

And I can't see them, but they're like they're already killing themselves You know what I mean? It's like what are you gonna you're just in it? Like what's the word? intimate All that I think it's that was if there was a studio audience that would got a big laugh After therapy and I was thinking about you a lot and your coping mechanisms in life And when I was with Julio at the vet over the weekend When he was under stress our dog Julio, he had an eye infection. He doesn't like that. I saw the picture on the yeah He's very he's he's a he's a he's very similar to Bobby in essence similar essence and eyes when put under stress

His way of coping Was to his way as a defense mechanism. He should himself at the vet both out of fear Defense and coping and I and I the vet told me this is actually what a lot of animals do when they don't want you when they're trying to like Go through a tough situation and I think with Bobby When his dad died as a defense mechanism as a coping mechanism, he defecated himself. You did No, not I'm talking figuratively not literally. Oh my god, cuz I was like, oh, what? I imagine my dad Well, my epiphany didn't come out as as nicely as I thought it that would have been the bet that was it

No, no, no, you better cook strong babe because we went on this journey figuratively figuratively yes figuratively you Shit yourself. Yeah in your own home in your own pants in your own bed on himself shit on himself. Yeah Yeah, I think that's what that's where I was like. Oh, yeah, he's he's coping and he's in defense He's on defense and he don't you fuck it. I hate when you do That's his way of telling me to shut up. No, that's not me. I love you. That's what oh my god

That's what does another thing he does to tell me That wasn't as I know you're getting by the way No, no, no, no, that you know what what I take it all back. That wasn't a great epiphany We're keeping it in. Well, no in a way not cutting it out Kaili. No As a defense mechanism, he's kind of shitting all over the place in a way shitting on his life When someone's trying to help him yes, the vet is trying to help you Trying to help you but you want to just shit on your own bed no matter what I Love you. What kind of shirt is that? That's cool. It's free. It's a free shootie pie. Can you give me a medium?

He doesn't know who that is. He just love keep my logo. All right, so, um What do you what did you watch on anything good? Parasite or you see parasite. No, I haven't seen parasite masterpiece. You got to watch it I'm not I see you until I get back from the institution. How long I'm not doing it. That's why I'm gonna I'm gonna say institution 12 more times by the that But um, I Thank you. You were the right guest Mm-hmm for today because I honestly don't think that I would be able to do it with anybody else

That's where I'm at. I'm in such pain that I and I'm you know people listening Tiger Billy fans by the way, I have to say this laugh because I Had a troll I posted a photo. You really hurt my feelings a troll Because I posted a photo with me in Keegan and he's like look at you know, there's one guy That's honed his craft is evolving become a big star There's not and he's the other guy who tells fart jokes and he's so desperate to get acting parts. That's the comment Right. So when you read something like that, you just especially I'm not kidding you This is the best my career's ever been. Yeah

Just in terms of work, right? So I wasn't gonna say something, but I just kind of I did comment I said something like well Keegan doesn't do stand-up. So I'm honing. What do you mean? Well, there's nothing compared to he's you know, why would you even I did that? What do you say? You know, I don't agree with that. I don't agree with not commenting sometimes. You're right I'm not the one to talk because I I interviewed my own troll on patreon on a patreon episode Should I do patreon is that should I do that? Yes, I should yes, but let me finish my point my friends

Here's what it is is and then you click on the troll and they're not you know, they always have Jesus or Bible quotes No, but not this person this person was always a fat guy who has 80 followers He lives in Michigan. I don't know where right. He works at some laundry now I don't know what he does right and it just out of nowhere. He just out of the blue just wants to Yeah, do that. Well, what you know, but what I love about Tiger Belly fans is I no longer am gonna comment Do you know why why because Tiger Belly fans do it for me and they do it more viciously To kind of shit, I have your grandmother's eyeballs. Yeah filled with A's and they explode into the fucking mind Can I just like they get real personal? I love it

There is one today. I get last night I posted a picture of what I thought was a really cute photo of Gobi and I yeah, and everyone number one thought I was cuddling a goat Second of all, there's one commenter said I look like Takashi six nine and it broke me it broke Why I went to therapy today, and I was like I do look like You know what I look at the mirror and all I could see was I'm just Missing the tattoos. I look like Takashi. All right. All right. All right. Hang on. Hang on Bobby. Yeah, first of all I know it's very hard But you it's just like what are you it's torture

You're looking at one comment. You're looking at a hundred people going. Oh my god. It was so funny that episode was so funny You guys are blah blah blah. Oh my god. You're a fucking idiot. No. No, I know I rarely do it Okay, good. Don't people get personal and doesn't make any block immediately block. It doesn't make any sense though. Sorry Block all right. All right. All right. That's power watch block. You don't get to do anything anymore You lose or you let people think or you let it pass you by yes That's actually about her. There's two ways to do it. You either just never delete never respond or Daddy are you out? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, we should listen to that you're so far away by the way

I'm gonna play it now. Yeah, but Dax by the way one time somebody wrote an article about him And he just was like what the fuck you the guy was so mean and he emailed the guy back and he goes dude You don't even know me. Why would you say all these things about me? He goes because that's how I feel about you That's what my opinion is and that's none of your business and he goes You're right. Wow and that was it in fact I remember one time there was a movie that we did Dax and I and some guy was because it was a good movie Some guy put this quote. He's like he's like Tom Arnold is not funny

Dax Shepherd is never funny Michael Rosenbaum has and never will be funny. Wow, and I thought it was funny So I shared it with Dax because I don't want to hear that stuff. I don't want to know about that. Yeah Don't tell me anything. You know what? I actually feel the same way because one of my band mates after The album came out and of all there was a bunch of nice reviews one person Who's like an 18 year old goes? Here's what I have it wrong with the album Here's this is like a stop stop and I was starting getting on a machine. I don't need to hear this. Yeah, it doesn't mean no good

Because it's funny. It's funny. No, it's not. I don't need to have negativity. I don't need it I have enough I imagine being Trump. I look at Trump's Twitter. Have you read his car? No, I stopped. I stopped. He doesn't he doesn't read it He must not know what's going on. Oh Yeah, okay, um, let's just close out with this daddy with this a coldplay song and I want to say Can't hear it. Oh, there's a heartbeat thing. Maybe I should ask for it. I'll fast Leave it leave it part of the experience So anyway

Michael Put it louder. It's just as loud as it's gonna go Michael yeah, thank you for being here. I'm sorry about the situation that you're in personally Oh, he hasn't seen yet. I thought it was gonna sing there. Yeah granola on your mic. It doesn't matter Doesn't matter right now because this is audio. Thanks Bobby for being so open. Yeah, and I and thank you for being here in your busy schedule It's not that we go right You sound like him actually sing with him sing with him. I don't know the lyrics. Oh, you can do lyrics. I think We're here

Okay, isn't nothing that you want to say you real though. Yeah, I'm sorry I'm gonna sing with you. I think I found out This is where I cry now right here This is the reverb give me a little more mic Where are you imagine? Yeah. Yeah. Anyway Oh, you know what I just got you to you what you started feeling again. I know that's why even now you stopped it. Yeah, I can understand that Yeah, yeah guys guys daddy dead too. Okay I'm sorry, I love I'm sorry

So, um This is you know this podcast. I don't I don't put pressure on this podcast to go. Is it gonna be funny? I don't give a fuck This podcast was very real. I needed it. So thank you so much. I love you. I love you watch inside you Listen to inside whatever free. Whatevs everywhere. I love you guys I love you. Isn't this am I the most? Yes, the guest that's been out here most you are now number one. Yeah, am I 100%? Yeah, absolutely I love that. Yeah, that means a lot. See I'm like you're like my Joe Rogan. I'm like your Tito. Yeah, well, no and um, no because I um

Just shut you Michael. I don't look at number. I don't know what other podcasts do I don't I don't know how I on ask them They don't I don't even know what I make if I make any I Stay away from the results of it. Wait, but you're well informed. I inform you I understand that But I don't know I just said that you tell me but yeah, I don't know logistics Yes, Bobby here. Oh, I want to say is this I You know when you love something so much and you're so passionate about it. I don't care I'll be good the money. I do I just want people give them up. I just want people to hear it Michael Rosenbaum

I love them inside of you guys guys listen to inside of you Michael Rosenbaum. Thanks. Thank you, buddy Hello, everyone welcome back to the housekeeping with Gilbert your queen Coloco and that thing thing over there George Kimmel. What's up? What's up? Do you guys have any shout outs or? Shout-ins shout out to Albert Pratt for doing that cool animation at the beginning of this episode of Bobby's dates Shout out to you, man. Kalilah shout out to my Thanksgiving Stuffing that I'm about to make that I haven't bought any ingredients

You literally have to go to the gas station and buy corn nuts for it to dust it off Red Guild No, you can get corn nuts at a Like anywhere you could get get wherever you get your ingredients get corn nuts there now Do you think that I should use boxed or? Should I already just buy it made cornbread? You know what I did hmm. I had my sister bake me the cornbread See that's cheating because she makes really good stuff You could buy it, but I mean like I think you're you're a good baker, too So it just takes more time you just have to do it today like if you don't tell me any anything

I'm just gonna bake a jiffy and use that as my base. She's a jiffy. She's good Okay, you guys like into cornbread stuffing. Are you into the breads? This is someone who clearly hates Thanksgiving. It's just like a forced conversation No, the reason I hate Thanksgiving is because you don't have it in the Philippines. I didn't grow up with it but also November is a really rough transition when the sun sets really early and this is where I sink into Depression and paralysis. Well, that's what we're thankful for. Well. Hey, you know what? I'm thankful for you Kalilah Ate Thanks, Gil. Why are you covering your nose?

cuz trying to cope All right having a mental breakdown, that's fine. Okay, I have regrets about I have regrets about that episode Can we talk about that? Mm-hmm You know some sometimes like something we when you think of something you're like, wow, that is so prophetic and I Can't wait to say this out loud and everyone's gonna fuck it I'm gonna get a standing ovation for this thought and you say it and you're like, oh my god That didn't come out quite right

And now the whole room is looking at you like you've just gone off the deep end. I actually liked it a lot I understood I was laughing because Bobby was like you're he's pissed that you compared him to a dog shitting Well, he that's exactly what he is. He's a dog shitting in his own bed. It's a good analogy I I wish there was a better analogy that I could come up with but it seemed right for the time It was good. Don't be ashamed of it. Thanks, Guild. I also regret No, I don't regret but the reason I'm very sensitive about the whole Takashi thing Pull a photo right here and put it next to Kalilah. Thank you editors

Okay, it's because listen you have to hear me out So I have since thought I have long since thought that I do resemble Takashi and Especially without makeup where my eyes are a little bit more Squinty and I have big cheeks and my eyes are a little bit more together than others, right? Which is a very so I had I thought this for a long time and I thought okay No one's gonna say anything because I don't have rainbow hair and I don't have tattoos on my face Well, one time about two years ago when I was in Joshua tree I took a picture with Bobby with which I thought and I put it on my story

mm-hmm and One person was like, oh my god And I had a fucking meltdown in the desert because he confirmed to me what I saw in myself and what I saw in the mirror, right? And then that's why fast forward to yesterday when I posted that picture and then another person said I look like Takashi now Now it's it's proven. I I look like him. There's no telling me otherwise But I ain't no snitch So in a sense, I'm still a little bit better. Should we have him on the podcast? He's in jail

Via phone prison phone call Look, I think that I don't want you guys to do a side-by-side, you know, you've already invited There's gonna be so many licks and Takashi like gang like pose cuz I was always wondering like, you know, I think like Chris Delia had a Takashi thing going on and people You know put Takashi and Chris did they kind of like amalgamated So you say it and I was like, oh my god I always thought I was like if I would die if someone did that to me because I actually look like him and And now I've just fucked myself. I think can we take this part out? Nope. We're gonna keep it in but no one do a side-by-side

I think it's always fine to be the better-looking version of someone Yeah, but Version of Takashi, I am the poorer version of Takashi Yeah, but I'm the non-criminal but if it's comparing looks it's a if you're like You don't want to ever be like the poor man's to cash it to cash He there's somebody out there who does not look as good as Takashi and they're like everybody's like oh, you look like Takashi six nine except Not as good, but when I look at him George Sand comes out of my vagina. I find him to be so unattractive. So you're the better-looking version of him

No, I when I when I see him in me. I don't want to ever masturbate for the rest of my life. What's his race? He's um not Gordon He's from Central America, I think yeah, I think he might be a mix I think is a stepdad is something other than he is possibly as well. So it might be Yeah, a lot of things. Yeah, well guys, there's a Clila's gripes But maybe that's why I'm depressed Takashi fucked you over Guys if you are listening to this the merch store is still open right now. So make sure it's your chance This is your chance to grab some stuff for the year ends and before Christmas if you miss the last one

So grab some old shirts from back in the day and some new stuff. Guess what? It's an entire store 25% off. What right? There we go. Wow, that's a lot Stuff for my family. Bye. Stop stop Guys, we love you so much Clila. Where can we follow you? Um at Kashi 69 People just are falling. I love you at Tiger Valley, Takashi Oh, I'm gonna fucking go comment on Tia's 11 Instagram

Go comment on all his photos that he looks just like Clila. Let's get yeah, let's see what that does Calamity cake if our calamity cake George will come you follow George under score cable. Oh my god I'm gonna be him for next Halloween. That's perfect done Done, but he won't be relevant by then. He still will be trust me. Brass, where can we follow you in micro fishing? Brass, how follow me at Gilbets and Bobby everything at Bobby Lee live and all his tour dates at Bobby Lee live comm false uh tiger belly on instagram at tiger belly on twitter at the tiger belly and emails any questions at You know advice on helpful a gmail.com and just uh, you guys know some tour dates bray of california. Nope. We already did that You're dumb give it to me

Oh, I'm dumb aggressive can some people get some that takashi photos side by side asap Please. Uh, you know what? I kind of want to see you All right, uh, we doing it. Okay. Um, bobby's dates go to bobbyleelive.com for more, uh, Road dates his next date of san francisco, california at the punchline december 12 through the 14th Then um, hilarity sin cleveland, which he's rescheduled to january 7th and 8th Then irvine california at the irvine improv january 17th to the 19th and then shomburg at the chicago improv february 13th through the 16th Love you Oh

Hey prime members you can listen to tiger barely ad free on amazon music Download the amazon music app today or you can listen ad free with wondery plus in apple podcast Before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at wondery.com slash survey