TigerBelly - Ep 275: Jeremiah Watkins is The Sacrificial Lamb

Episode Date: December 9, 2020

Bobby is the #1 mic sucker. Jeremiah puts Tony Hinchcliffe above Bobby. Khalyla is ovulating. We talk the Vegas bomb, Yardhouse Asian slurs, Before Khalyla (BK) times, and the Great Souplantation Robbery.Singing Competition Episodes: www.patreon.com/tigerbellyPlease support our sponsors.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey prime members, you can listen to Tiger Belly add free on Amazon music download the app today. I Feel mean Old I'm bringing I'm bringing that out of you dude. I know I feel mean yeah, I think yeah Yeah, I think he does but I was watching that show. We finished that show undoing. Okay. What's that one? It's on HBL Kidman, oh, you you you he's fucking great. Isn't he you? Yeah, is it Hugh Grant? Yeah, what's it? What's oopsie daisy? Oh my gosh, babe, Notting Hill. Oh really take a famous line from that movie. Who's he daisy? Yeah, yeah, oh you're gonna start with did he say that when he had that black prostitute? Oopsie daisy my bad

That's what I like about it because that's all I never saw notting notting. I never saw anything that he's ever been in What else is you grant? I don't know So I know what he looks like because of the prostitute on Santa Monica Boulevard when he did that That's how I know I'm that's just big credit. You know, I mean, that's what yeah, it's all in design DB Actually, well, that was like, you know, I mean I was a fan of that You know, and then once I saw undoing I go, holy fuck This huge you guy more versatile can fucking act You never saw four four weddings in a funeral. I don't watch any English bullshit, but anyway nine months

Nine months isn't nine months. It's one of those pregnant movies. Yeah. Yeah, you don't talk until I bring your name up Okay, got you Get to see you though. It really is You're not even looking at me Anyway good to see you dude, I don't know the amount of space that he asked me to stay away from him while he was smoking I say just go towards the street, dude. Keep coming You want to start I want to be positive. I want to be good. Is the heat on you Yeah, it was on so I turned it off. Oh, thank you. It's really hot here. I know, but I love it when it's sweaty in here

When I play at night, that's why I put the heat up when you get all those dubs with Dylan now I got four four and ninths in a row. I'm aware of your record right again. Thank you Thank you so much. I really appreciate it and it's really kind of you I'm getting better people are saying on Twitter that my awareness is you know made more clinical and you know, and that I'm I've improved nice So that's a good feeling anyway, what you want to start. Yeah Five Three two one here. Hello. Hello. Here you go. You grant. Hello

He loves it. He loves getting his penis dirty You grant. Yep, and he's a great actor as well and that Nicole Kidman. Holy shit. Has she ever seen the Sun? She's so white But she's so beautiful Yeah, you too. You too. You too, man. Is that Nicole Kidman? Those are you have Nicole Kidman's body, honestly No, don't say anything. I'm her body double. He has to me Timothy McVeigh's body. Okay. Yeah, which is this probably the same thing? He has a Timothy McVeigh vibe It's good to be here. You know, we've taken a break from Tiger Belly

You know we the podcast that you were listening to the Bill Burr one the uh, Jesse may just say me paluso one. They were all backlogged. We're now fresh now We're we're up to date and it's really good day. I went to Hawaii. Oh, loa. Loa, Waikiki, you know Mahalo to you. I love my law. I didn't leave my apartment or my hotel room for fucking a week and a half And I just played war zone and then I acted as well Mm-hmm, but um, I have to say something about this next guest. I Saw a photo of his father It's a good start. That's a good start on Instagram and I was confused. I was confused

I was confused man, and I'll tell you why man So I see the father and I go Handsome man by the way, you know, he's no Hugh Grant, but he's up there. Okay. I was looking at him when I was going is Jeremiah's mother a pelican Because the father's nose is like a button, right? Oh like small. Yeah So he what is what is the where does he get the note the bird shit?

Yeah, I mean the big bird shit he had when can I start talking not yet. Okay. I'll say your name I already defend the baby the longer. Yeah, he's getting up. I'm part of that gang. Yeah Yeah, and I'm part of the I'm part of the bird gang. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, and I love the bird gang the tooch But um, I also want to say I know I attacked you but that's not the intro that I was gonna start with. Okay The intro I wanted to start with is a very good one and a very positive one and I have to say this You remind me of a Young like what I felt about Melissa via senior or I felt about Leslie Jones in the sense that

There is something I think big that's gonna happen for you And I think that and I hate saying this because it's a compliment, but I honestly think that you're a mercilessly talented and I think that Your work ethic is Just up there man. I've never seen a young man Work so hard You fucked me in Vegas. Oh, you fucked me over in Vegas. I think you fucked himself. No when he opened for me Yeah, oh, we can talk about

But he fucked me hard and it was a devastation It was it was my 9-11. I can't wait Sorry, I can't wait to tell my version of the story. It was absolute disaster But I just remember you guys rented or read Mustang. Yeah. Yeah, it was a dodge challenger Oh, don't show that much credit And we drove out there, but so I think that he's really talented. He makes me laugh. I think He what he's also done over the years is the neediness of him, right? It has died down and he's a little bit more jaded, which I like

Yeah, look at him. He's got the Tom Cruise lies going And I let's introduce his name is Jeremiah Watkins. Give him a round of applause. Yeah Now you can talk. How are you? Thank you, man? It's so nice to be here with Looks like a dumpling wish to be a real boy for a day. This is good. This is good. See this is what I love about him Yeah, we got one we got we got one time. We got one time Theo Vaughn over here Haha, go ahead. I love it. It's good man. Is there more? Oh, you look like a substitute teacher at Hogwarts Yeah, see when people slam me I'm used to that. I'm used to it. You know, I was grew I grew up with it, you know

So is there any more? You look like a bootleg home alone villain That's for that one doesn't Christmas season one. That was a Christmas. Yeah, that's inspired by the beanie. Yeah Yeah, and you look like the bottom of the wet bandits change jar. You know what I mean? Yeah, I do know what you mean. Yeah. Yeah, the sticky bandits. Yeah, that fifth one was good too. Thank you, man Any more? No, I'll simmer with that for a second. No, no, let me ask you something. Did you come up with those on the spot? I've been thinking about you all day Right because I knew I knew Bobby. I knew this how I Bobby greets me all the time He has told me so many times like

Twitter I do that a lot sweet. Hi bird man. Yeah. Yeah, or he'll just go you're the ugliest person I've ever seen That when I when I told him that my wife was pregnant. He goes He's the ugly. I don't know how you did it. Yeah. Yeah, so you're the ugliest. It's okay George gets the same treatment, but I'll tell you why and I and I and I he's projecting. I'm projecting. Thank you I don't know what that word means, but I am All right, so I'm projecting and number two It's it's a sign of Love coming from me. Oh, dude. Don't you do or do you think that I'm being mean? No, I love you

All right, so you know that there's love way back. I know that you know There's love you wouldn't you wouldn't give attention if you didn't love, you know what I mean? That's right The people that I feel that the people that I don't like I ignore exactly. Yeah, or Or are on on my radar. I just kind of not that I do a Sebastian Monoscalco You know what? What does men ask I'll go do at the comedy store? He comes in he comes in doesn't suddenly you never even you know, he's there, right? He's in it. Yeah Yeah, and a lot of doorman go they go Does he really like me? He's like he doesn't even know you. He's not even thinking about yeah

Yeah, he's not even on a part of radar. Yeah. Yeah, you're not even a part of the you know, yeah You're like a um, you know a tree or something or or the dumpster at the you know The the back dumpster is at the comedy store. He doesn't so um when young kids come up They you know it they have to do things to To make me go. Oh, there there he is, you know, you know, who's another one I like is um What's that little fat come down dumpster? Yeah, yeah, I love that kid. Yeah, but I really do like you and I and I apologize if over the years, you know that I treated you um poorly

Yeah Yeah, I have ever made you mad. Of course. Tell me tell me some you you want to hear? Yeah. Yeah, um One time you said to me That we couldn't hang out anymore until I was a headliner Damn, that's an ultimatum for sure and that was yeah, but you know what what a little fire Underneath me. That's what I did because I was pissed because basically you told me that I had graduated from Featuring for you. You're like you're done, dude. Yeah done. It's not it's not happening anymore. Yeah, and I was like, all right Well, yeah, we should hang out you're like

Yeah, we're not hanging out until your headliner. Yeah, you know kidding, right? Did that we I have not hung out until I was a Yeah, but I called you like the beginning of the pandemic though. Yeah, do you remember when I called you? No Oh, exactly. And then what I said, I called us like hey a man Uh, how's it going? And immediately you get filled with rage whenever you hear somebody say how's it going? Cuz you you don't you don't like to talk to people on the phone. I know that about yeah Yeah, I was like, hey, I just wanted to check on you and Kalilah's say I miss you. Love you guys Yeah, sending some good vibes and you're like Like right away, but he picked up he did pick up though. He never picks up. I don't pick up

You know that yeah, I don't pick up you picked up when I called you and told you that my wife was pregnant You did and what did I say? You you say congratulations. Exactly. Because I'm a decent human being you'd ever seen I know, but are you you said some things about how you you said some choice words about certain comedians kids that I probably shouldn't say on the spot. Yeah, but leave that out. Please. I leave that out. I love to say it Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, okay Well, we could cut it out you can say it and then maybe if it's too much we cut it okay He's like go ahead. Okay. We're gonna leave that out. Okay. I would cut that out Too far too far a little too far. Okay, because he's one of the kings and I want to attack a king. Yeah, you know

So you want to talk about Vegas or what happened? Yeah, I like the story. I like how you think that I set you up for destruction because Okay, so Bobby calls me in the middle of the day I Remember this very specifically because I just got done shooting like a music video in Venice and he calls me He's like amen. What are you doing tomorrow? I was like, I don't know. I got like a show around here locally in LA, but that's about it. What's up? He goes you want to go to Vegas?

And I go what? You're gonna go to Vegas with Papa. Yeah The way yeah, that's how I do and I was like like for like like for a show Yeah, yeah Daddy's got a private corporate gig and I need it open for me. Yeah, I was like, okay great And he goes all right meet me tomorrow my place Pick me up and then we're gonna go rent a car and then we'll drive to Vegas. I was like, okay, cool So we go to the the rental place

He fills out all the paperwork and we're looking all the cars and then he like tosses me keys like an 80s movie I catch him and he's like that's us over there. Yeah And it's like your drive. Yeah, you know the way Yeah, of course I did. Yeah, you're on your iPad the whole time. It's beautiful. Yeah, and it was a brand new Dodge Challenger and It was like Really a much faster car than we needed like by any means. Yeah, and we go to Vegas and We have a good time like Bobby's take it to dinner. You did. I mean I remember the picture of that steak. The steak was ridiculous because they were a fan of Bobby and they're like

I'm gonna get you prime cut and just we couldn't even finish the meat. Yeah. Yeah, and I being you know, his poor opener I'm like, can I take some this to go? Bobby will not let you take The amount of why why though, you're like I paid for it That's mine because people I tell that story sometimes and people don't believe me Yeah, the amount of meals that that I wanted to take with Bobby But then you ever crazy, but you just leave it. But then you go you really want that you really want that, dude You just take some money. Just go get a new meal. Okay, get a new meal. I know I'm such a gross person Hearing hearing it though. Yeah, right. It makes me feel like why do I behave that way? So and this is good

This is a good thing. So then what happens? so we have a great time like just like on the way we get some meals and stuff like that and I remember at the check-in counter. We had a room like at this amazing suite at the win at the win. Yeah, like it was It was like this amazing spread. I'd never seen a hotel like this in my life. I'm from Kansas I'm like, I'm in Vegas right now with Bobby like this is crazy and we check into the counter and he's like amen reservation for Bobby Lee and He's oh welcome, mr. Lee and He looked at the guy at the counter. He's like, yeah, we're gonna. We're gonna go fuck each other in that room

And and as a joke though as a joke as a joke, you know, Bobby does I like yeah, yeah, yeah that thing Yeah, yeah, and and and I like go into it I go along with it because I yes and everything like yeah, yeah, man I'm gonna suck his dick and Bobby didn't like that. I played along with it He likes to be the weirdest person in the room. Yeah, it's mad when somebody outweards him. Yeah. Yeah, I do It's really upset. I do. He's like, hey, he's like, yeah, I'm gonna fuck his butt like it like he had to Yeah, so we check into this room

And I tell Bobby I'm like, oh, can we take can we take like some some promo photos? and he's like, yeah, sure and And so he has his shirt off and I started to take my shirt off and he goes whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa What are you doing? I? Was I was gonna join in with you, you know promo photo. Yeah now man. That's me. You're the opener keep your shirt on He's like he's very much likes to put me in my place like I like our entire friendship. I feel bad It's okay, but finish the story so we go to this gig later in the evening and It's for an all-male crowd

Literally at the top of the show It's it's like a four Bobby comes a men's like it's a billionaire men's club Yeah, and it's like, you know a bunch of businessmen and millionaires, right? And I don't know why you would think that they would hire Burt Kreischer or somebody of that elk, right? But for some reason they wanted me and so we go into this and also in this room, right? It's not just a showroom. It's it's a gigantic like a warehouse looking like a place, right? It's a mansion ballroom ballroom, right huge ballroom And then it's like the other half of the ballroom is curtain off for an auction

So there's like sports cars in there and like memorabilia, you know, I mean, yeah and people are You know in in in the place where we're performing people are there But they're also people are out bidding and walking around in this other area So there's it's and and we're supposed to perform for just the front part of yeah in this environment It's almost as like performing in front of a cafeteria. Yeah, right because it was like there was no show Almost what I felt like it felt like a nightmare. It was it was one of the hardest gigs. I've had I've never seen anybody Bomb as bad as Jeremiah. I mean, I've seen thousands of shows, right?

But here's what I loved about it. It's like, you know, when you bought like I've seen openers Bomb and cry or they they start off strong But it's late the crowd, you know, I mean wither them down into nothing, right? And when I see that happening, I feel sad. All right, but what when I see what Jeremiah did, right? It makes me proud like a proud parent. What this fucking guy got he goes up there and people there are guys standing up With red-faced veins on their faces, right? This is a hundred percent true. Yeah, a hundred percent true You suck get off get off the stage. Yeah. Oh my god

Screaming yeah screaming, you know, they don't know worried about neighbors. Oh, yeah. Yeah that but that's But literally literally That's in the first 40 seconds. Yeah, oh right and I'm in the back like it through a curtain looking at him, right? And when I'm hearing get off Jeremiah is on stage upside down With a stool or something, right and a pose pole and he's doing some sort of Right He doesn't meeting thousand he does not care, right? He does how much three minutes? No Well, I'm you said you said this is what you said right before I went on. Yeah, because you had to do 40 minutes for this

Oh, my god, you do 40 minutes and you go you go. All right. I Need you do seven minutes and if you want to make daddy real happy do more like 10 All right. Yeah, okay, and before I went out there. They just done a raffle. They just done a raffle. Yeah, and then the guy the host He gets handed a card and he goes. Oh, I Guess I guess the the act brought an opener This is my intro I guess the act brought an opener. Yeah Please welcome Jeremiah doesn't even say man. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm like Jeremiah and I walk out

Nobody claps. Nobody class because they want to see Bobby Mm-hmm. So what Bobby knew was gonna happen is that I was gonna be the sacrificial lamb Yeah, or that gig I ate it too No, you didn't know you didn't I not as hard as you Bobby. You're doing that thing. You're doing that thing you do No, no, no, no, no Him saying he crushed it. Yeah, exactly. He did great Oh, but he told me but but to preface this on the on the way to Vegas the entire time Bobby is telling me you're gonna bomb the night. Oh, I love that one. You're gonna

Have I done that to you before my first time doing state You actually get on this podcast for three weeks and promote. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, huh? So and I was like, no, I'm not no, I'm not you're you're like you'll see you'll see and then it happened The only laugh I heard the entire time was Bobby dying laughs backstage Just cackling because it was so he thought it was so funny to see what was happening Just the absolute nothing that I was getting in the ground. I know but I wasn't laughing at the because you're failing I was laughing at the fact that you're seeing two different things at the same time. Yeah, of course You're seeing hatred like literally like, you know, um

Imagine like AOC going to a Trump rally. Yeah, that's what it felt like. Yeah, like just the wrong person at the wrong time Right and then AOC committing right to a speech Right and finishing it like doubling like I'm gonna I have a ten minute speech I'm in a Trump rally and I'm gonna finish it now imagine AOC Saying good night, and then Trump walking out kicking her in the pussy That was Bobby that night He destroyed and

Literally after the show like, you know, they're cutting in the check and stuff and they're like, wow, that's amazing Everybody's coming up to him shaking his hand one pictures and I'm just standing there like looking for anything the entire time Just looking for any reassurance and the booker kept looking at me and going Yeah, kid. Good luck. Uh Yeah, but then Bobby he knew what had happened He took me out to like the nicest steak dinner afterwards and reward me like dude You did exactly why I brought you here You did exactly what I wanted you because I'm gonna tell you something all right if he hadn't gone up before me and done that

I would have struggled for 15 minutes. Of course. Yeah, right. Yeah, I knew so I needed a kid Right that was gonna commit to it. Right was going to know he was gonna fail Right and set me up And I'm gonna say this right now. It sounds cruel, but I had been that guy Of course, right. Jay Moore did it to me at USC. Oh, right. We had a daytime show, right? It was so supposed to start at five, right and I was supposed to do 15 minutes But I'm I'm I'm in my 15 minutes and and I was like about to wrap up But the Sun was still up and Jay Moore goes you're not getting off stage until the Sun is you're mean

gone Till it sets until it's black. Oh, geez, right? And I remember being up there for an hour Yeah eating it Just running around. I did everything I could every trick that I had in the running around You know clap sing a song right? I was doing everything right and I bombed so bad And I got off stage so angry off stage so angry and then Jay went up, you know, I mean everyone cheered He killed it and I just remember just being in a ball of anger in the back But then in retrospect I go I thought you know, that's just the best

You know comedy experience that you can have because it's like You're learning to perform Right, like when you're on the tonight show and you're bombing Right, if you're if you've condition conditioned yourself to pretend that you're doing well in a hostile environment, right? People on the camera watching it are gonna go. Oh, he's doing fine. Mm-hmm, right? It's if you let the audience affect you, right, then you're dead And that's why I think the comedy stores or such store is so important because it's such a tough room, right?

Yeah, we were able to learn how to that's right when you play the comedy store and then you go to a place like the ice house It's easy. It's like you're killing it, right? but I think that you know putting young comics in those kind of You know environments is a good thing in the beginning of all this you said that in Vegas. He fucked you So it was the other way around I did fuck him You fucked him. I fucked you. Yeah, dude. I fucked you and I apologize. It's okay, man But look at you now. I know I'm here with you No, it's not that

I've been we freaking made it dude. I'm gonna say something. Okay when I watch you when I watch you on Tony Hingecliffe's show. Yeah, right? Yeah, what's a kill Tony? Yeah, right? It's and I watch you improvise into different characters and and do your thing I think I literally always think to myself. Wow, that guy is so funny. I really do Quick quick quick quick quick quick for your teeth You guys I never used to brush my teeth ever It was like a yearly event and my teeth started falling out And I think the reason why if I had quip my whole life

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Flicked it. Well this holiday season check out quips exclusive deals And if you go to get quip comm slash belly right now, you get your first refill free That's your first refill free at get quip comm slash belly spell Gtqip comm slash belly quip better oral health made simple enjoy the rest of the show I think to myself that guy is so quick and so fast and he's young and And he's white. He's he's odd-looking, you know, and I think all those things, right? Well, what's so funny? I give you a couple of it. It's okay. I'm I'm conditioned to like the pain. I'm like, yeah, daddy I know because I think

By you having by you being here at tiger belly, I'm I'm I'm gonna say something out loud my my relationship with you From now on is gonna be different My relationship with you from now on is gonna be as a peer Yeah As as one of the gang, right? I think that you've done a lot You know to prove to me and to the people or my generation of comics that you belong and that you're a real the real deal And I I want to say I apologize for roasting you and treating you like shit over the years and

But I have to I have to say that I've always loved you and I um, I just think that you have a really bright future and congratulations on I'm having a baby. Thank you. Yeah, and congratulations on the future. Thank you, man Mm-hmm. I appreciate that God. That was hard to say. I know I felt like the graduation song like was Yeah, that was difficult to say, but I really do mean that. What was your graduation song? Wait, when did you graduate? What year? High school was like 07 Okay, it was around the time It's the same one for like the ten years. It was yeah, right and then it was Green Day for a while I hope you have the time of your life. Yeah, yeah, ten years before. Yeah, what I like about you, too

Is that you came to town as this devout Christian? Right. Yeah. Oh, can I say something about like you congratulate me on and you never liked me to bring this up But you and my wife have touched my penis more than anybody Look at that. Congratulations to you. Maybe it's you're in my top, too Dude, I'm not wait. First of all, you're my top because of because you have a Christian background Yeah, yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, and I've never touched your penis in the flesh No, no, it's through layers of clothing and right. Yeah, and they're love taps. They're not really caressing some squeezes You squeeze my nose. Yeah, he's like copy paste, you know, yeah

You've never touched mine. Oh, yeah. Well, that's the thing is like you don't like it when I touched it back You do it hard. I don't I think I remember you doing it. No, no, I just gave you a little tap and you're like You're like I'm the headliner, dude. You don't Yeah, I know you know what and and because you're here. I'm gonna I'm gonna negotiate something with you I get to touch your penis or we can negotiate this Or we can negotiate maybe that because You know our culture has changed

that Either we can do a deal where we can freely touch each other genitals. Okay anytime we want. Yeah. Yeah, or We just don't ever do that again. Okay, or you could just state your consent now. Oh, God. Yeah. Yeah Oh, yeah, so what do you want to do? Give him consent man. Say it to the camera. No, I'm giving consent to Bobby Lee Okay, touch my genitalia Dude, you know that like your brother and I we're real close. We turn each other's pubes and stuff, right? Okay That's crazy. I know keep it in an in a lock. No, but I've seen my brother hold up a bag of his own pubes Oh, and I know because Jeremiah has something to do with that. Yeah, we're called scissor brothers

It's on Jeremiah wonders. That's this whole storyline. How many how many times have you done it with my brother? He literally he was on this week for the fourth time. Wow. Now. Do you love my brother? I love your brother. Why cuz he's like just the more positive version of Right he is right, you know the movie twins with Danny DeVito and Arnold Schwarzenegger. Yeah, Arnold Schwarzenegger But see here's the deal I want to be that positive light now. Okay, great, right? Yeah, I want you to have a relationship with my Brother Steve. I love my brother. I love Steve. Yeah, but but I Don't want to be

The negative version of it, right? I mean, I want to be positive. Yeah, and do you feel that I've changed? You've gotten more positive over the years for sure and Kaleila had a big part to do with that Like a huge part to do with it like a massive part to do with it. Do you think so? Yeah Yeah, she made you a better person dude off of me. Yeah, of course and he hard and called you out on your stuff You didn't have anybody to call you out in your crap. So then Kaleila came in and fixed you man Thanks. Yeah, she has done that. I mean my wife did the same thing with me I like you know what I mean like as a comic like she's put up with a lot like you You know better than anybody like how much you have to put up with when you're dating a comedian

It's like patience is such a virtue with you ladies That's an interesting thing that you said because it's not obviously because the process is slow And you don't really kind of see, you know the change really because it's just it's been an eight-year relationship, right? But if I do look back, you know, there's definitely been a change and she's you know, she's done a lot for me You know, I honestly think that I would have already had COVID If you were you dude, you definitely would I would have because you still would have been touring and like sucking on mics and stuff Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I would have number one Mike sucker, too I know yeah, I suck on that. Yeah, I'm so close to it too all the time. I lick it

You know I mean so disgusting, but that's not your ultimate dream. Is it what stand up? I Mean, I always want standards to be a part of my career. I'll always do it for the rest. Yeah, I love it But you have bigger dreams. No Yeah, yeah, what are they? I mean, I want to do movies I want to be in a sketch show or whether it's my my sketch show or somebody else's sketch I that's another that that's the feeling that I had that like the reason why I think that you remind me of Melissa's I didn't think I think SNL might be Could be in your future

We'll see I keep submitting so oh you do. Yeah. Yeah, Melissa put in she was very sweet She put in a word for me this most recent time. It was yeah, sir so because I think that once you go there and and Seth and People see you is set up still a part of it I don't know. I don't think so. It's Colin Joseph and Michael Chay. Yeah, Michael. Yeah. Yeah, so I think I think once they see you I think once you're in the room off of a tape it would be difficult But I see you go in there with your energy that you I think you have a shot at that was the first thing you You told me when you saw me at the comedy store

You pulled me to the side because you used to Bobby used to Like early on when he was single he would just go and hang out during potluck and he would just like watch Comedians sets from the back of the room and just like and if he liked you It was dope because he would pull you aside and a lot of times I would see people get road work or whatever like hey I'm gonna come up for me on terror improv or that here. Yeah, I used to do that, huh? Yeah, you did do that a lot. Don't you anymore? um, I

Don't know I just want to come home. Mm-hmm. I think I think that's what it is. Yeah, like when I wasn't in a relationship. I I um, I Mean there's a Don't don't get offended, but it's two-fold. I like to stay out. Maybe I'll meet somebody. Mm-hmm. Oh, gotcha Right, maybe you could meet somebody, you know, and then also I I love watching young comics, you know Yeah, I do. I just you know, I like I remember a Lot of young guys that are big now that I saw for the very first time at open mic night Just sitting there and just watching them and going

Like that's how I met Santino. So I remember seeing Santino with Delia him and I were watching a Sunday and we saw Santino go up and Immediately him and I looked at each other and said That guy's good. There's something about that guy, you know, and then you see the guy, you know But then there are some people that you see and you don't think and they still do it Well, yeah, you know, there were guys that like like Sebastian When I first saw him I I could I would have bet my life on it that he would have never made it really Yeah, because he was wearing a red

Silk, you know, I mean like, you know some sort of Vegas showroom. He was a Guido. Yeah, like a red silk button up Do you remember my red blazer that I used to wear? No, you remember that? No, do you remember that call island? Oh, yeah, oh, yeah, I used to wear a red blazer at the first couple years at his standup It was obnoxious, but why because I thought it's gonna be my thing man. Yeah, I thought I needed a thing Yeah, you know what I mean? That's why the red blazer guy I made my hair really puffy and big sure and I used to suck like this. Really? Yeah Yeah, I had my hair up like this unrecognizable unrecognizable like on old tapes and stuff like that. Yeah, it is this I'd be like, what's up? So anyway, um and I used to do that on purpose because I thought that I needed a hook

Right, right and I used to wear like overalls with no shirt Underneath cowboy hat cowboy hat cowboy boots and go up on stage like that and and I tried to like Steve I know. Yeah, I was hey, that's weird. I know that's weird, but I Felt like I need it Yeah, but then you would have comics come up to you and go Dude, just be yourself Yeah, no, I like you're like what does that mean? I got the advice from three different comics to tell me to stop wearing it

They're like you do characters. You're not a character. Stop wearing that thing. Yeah, you don't point Yeah, and I think the people that like stick to those things those hooks They just it they're just one dime dimensional really. Yeah, you know, there was a guy named Jackie banana You ever don't tell you about Jackie banana. I don't think so. Yeah, but this oh wait, I do remember Jackie It sounds the name so there was his name was Jackie Graham So it was a comic named Jackie grab and one that night he was performing at the store and Mitzi Comes up to him and says Your new name is Jackie banana, and he goes what your new name is Jackie banana

He goes, okay, you had to wear a yellow suit Right, so he would go up on stage as Jackie banana wearing a yellow suit and then you know You never really you didn't really pan out or there was like and that man is Chris rock And then there are other ones like Well Carlos was one of those Mencia where you know his Mitzi told him to change his name He told Jackson Purdue she told Jackson Purdue from now on you have to wear a thick purple turtle neck like in the summer So he did it for like three years. Wow. We're a fucking turtle net purple turtle neck, all right, and

Because this is back in the 80s when Works were like they thought like you know like y'all coffee should wear enough, you know, yeah, what a country You know I mean that type of thing. Yeah, sure, but now What's your baby's name we don't know yet is it a boy or girl it's gonna be a boy is it I saw that you're Obulating Kalilah. I was any any plans with you, too. How do you know? She texted me bro Don't text me. She text me text me when I took that picture of my 70s thing And then you took it that oh, yeah. Yeah, that was the caption was this usually was yeah

Yeah, I think my factory might not be in in Full working shape. Okay, sure. Yeah, you know, we we haven't really tried it out during ovulation period So we don't know you might be shut down for good No, how do you know? I want to get it started. Are you? Yeah, that's not I want a baby But I don't want to talk about baby because we always talk What do you mean? Whoa? That'd be cool to see you guys parents. So are you still a Christian? I

I still believe in God, but I I don't think that I because you were a guy that wouldn't trick off Yeah, I none till I was like 17. Yeah. Yeah, when I met you, you're like, I know pussy Wait, hang on. I want to get I want to get into this So what would you do when you would feel the urge? Were you allowed to use your rub up against a wall without using your hands? I would get super creative I would go to rock climbing gyms Just Just leave me for a little bit No, I I don't know so

Until older like I literally just didn't know I Had no sex education at the Christian school that I went to they literally like we're gonna skip this section Oh, wow abstinence. Yeah, that's the only way. Thank you. Yep. We're gonna move on from that Yeah, and it was one of those things where I was like, okay I just started getting an ungodly amount of boners where I was just like this is this is crazy Yeah, like I was like dude if I hugged a girl in the hallway at high school It's like immediately and I'm wearing like basketball shorts and I'm the kid who's like walking like with the books and stuff Yeah, you know, yeah, just trying to hide it and stuff like that. So then I started jerking off and then you know loved it and

Never feels good. Oh, if it feels so good. It feels real Was there a bagel Literally, yeah, there's a bagel that Did you ever go into pornography or no? I did Only a few scenes I shot um I Would look at porn but there's a lot of guilt associated with that and I actually so I haven't been looking at porn during the pandemic really Which I've been trying to avoid doing it because I feel better about my relationship and everything with my wife when I'm not looking

At that stuff. I try not to consume that stuff Because it makes it does make our sex better for sure Yeah, if I'm avoiding looking at like graphic stuff online like it's just it is more special as cheesy as that sounds But I do think like I've done it both ways But when I'm on I was on the road, it's like you got to take care of it on the road and I would like yeah You know go to town like you'd have to yeah, you have to yeah Do you get girls hitting on you on the road now or no? I don't think I put out that vibe Yeah, you don't have a sexual. No, I know you're a sexual being right right? No

I'm gonna throw that out there. Yeah, you're a very sexual being and I could see why women would be attracted to you Thank you so much, but but You have mutante face. You know what I mean? He calls everyone mutante. Yeah, it's like a mutante. You know you have a very like what what is that disease that were The skin is inside out Harlequin Bobby would send me photos all the time and say I just found your doppelganger

He would send me those photos all the time Dude all the time he's like graphic stuff. I think there was one time We were looking at we were watching one of those shows and like the kid had like Pierre Robin syndrome And you were like, that's a baby Jeremiah Yeah, but you know, um, I apologize again, I'm okay. I'm okay changing as a person I have to apologize because one time I did something as a comic that was very embarrassing in front of you Kalayla this and you I doubt you I doubt you remember this I remember everything you remember everything. We were at we are at a yard house after one of the shows at the improv

And we're eating and Bobby was making Asian jokes And he was like saying jungle Asian and all this stuff and I think I said like an Asian slur And Bobby went up to me by the throat and he goes Yeah, but in a joking way, no, no, no, I would never violently attack you. I did that. What was it? What was a slur? I think I said Say it No, but we're allowing you to do it because here look into my eyes and call me whatever you Then look back at the camera. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, so you said gook. Yeah, right? Yeah, and then

They lift you off the ground Yeah, you got angry about that. I don't think I did that. That's why for me if a white you were trying it was early on It was very early on dating Kalayla. You were trying to impress how long I've known you. I've known you before yeah before Kalayla really Jeremiah was at The Irvine and no, Brea Brea improv, okay, and you opened for him and I remember You doing your jokes about snorting cocaine. Yes. Yes, all right him. Yeah, yeah Huh, I think it was then that we it was probably then yeah, it's probably the yardhouse right after that show

Yeah, and I remember Kalayla like like kind of like looked the other way and then like we went back to eating and it was fine Like well, here's a message to my white friends out there my white male friends Okay, if you're a white male careful, I know I am and you're out with your Asian friend and your Asian friend Yeah, right is dating another Asian, right? My message to the white guy is don't call the Asian woman a gook It's more no it was more the false sense of like, you know when you're hanging out with black friends and they're using the n-word a lot and then you get excited and you're like, oh I can say it too. It was that similar situation You're going down the list of like Asian slurs and stuff Yeah, and I am a young comic trying to impress Bobby and I like

Yeah, and I've never actually by the way, I have never I've wanted to But I never thought that I've been around a lot of like black friends and they use the n-word, right? But for some reason I just never had the balls to do it, right? Good for you as it should be you never and I hope it's trying to get beat up You know me. I just never had I've wanted to like, you know, I'm real like I'm real close with Jamar neighbors and Willie Hunter Yeah, we've done I love them years and years of shows together Yeah, and they'll let me have one every like couple years. Oh Really? Oh, yeah, would you ask first man? No, I don't I don't because it cuz it kills

Because we're all friends. Yeah, and they're like I used to do this joke that Jamar would give me like it was this bit that I Definitely can't do anymore But Jamar would be side stage and he would give me permission to say the n-word And in front of the crowd that's great and I would do it and like half the crowd loved it Yeah, and then the other half like was fuming angry every time I do it Yeah, because that's another reason why I like you In terms of your work is the the roast battles. Yeah, and your work with Jamar, right on those roast my battles are just so Fucking funny, man. Some of the things you've done you sometimes I've been involved, right?

Yeah, you jumped in a couple times. It's amazing. You make me do it Yeah, but the things that you guys would do I just felt like there was a good you and Jamar should do something Yeah, there's a good chemistry. Yeah, we have good chemistry. Yeah. Yeah, we want to figure something out Did you grow up with black people? I black friends and stuff like that and then like my mom I technically I had like a black stepdad for a little while after my parents had divorce and stuff like that. Oh Yeah, who was that? Did you call him that word? No, but my mom did I Really? Oh, yeah, oh, that's like terms of affection for that. All right

So the yeah, so the dad I saw on your Instagram isn't your biological dad. That's my biological dad Oh, yeah, but he does look like he's a darker skin tone than me. I'm yeah, it's weird He doesn't do nothing like it. I look nothing like my family members. I look nothing like them It's the weirdest thing. I think we should get it. Could you have been adopted? I don't think so Really? I don't think so. There's no similar like an eyeball. I look like my dad's brother a little bit But I have my dad's eyes. We both I have my dad's like brown eyes like a hundred percent. Yeah Haven't met your brothers or sisters? No, you haven't why oh, you know what you've you not you didn't meet my brother

But in at the Kansas City improv when they asked for and you asked for a volunteer to do your striptease on My brother volunteered one night and he called me. He goes, I just got a lap dance from Bobby Lee So that's the only connection that you guys have is is he's literally why wouldn't he have said I'm Jeremiah's brother Well, I was grinding up on him. I don't I don't know I can't do that anymore that dance. Oh, really? Oh, yeah That's done done Had to end somehow. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I mean, it's amazing closer. I was the only is the only closer that every Weight staff and every comedian would still pile into the room to see even though you've seen it It's yeah, I would feet. I remember one time like me a couple years ago

I Have a Christian friend her name is Beverly and she lives in Texas Mm-hmm, and she'd never seen the striptease and she saw the show. She was laughing through the whole show But then when she saw it Her husband and herself came up to me after the show. They came in the green room They throw holy water at you. No, and they were really concerned. What? Yeah, I just like for your well-being No, like I don't think that you need to do that. I think it's against, you know Because I know you don't believe in Christ, but

It's against the energies of what Christ would want you to do. It's just it's it's blasphemy You know me and I'd be like I was like, but it's killing Yeah, I don't care about Christ. I the audience loves it Christ killed two. Yeah, but like And then I remember being in Kansas City and the manager I doing that dance and the manager being a Christian He he told me to come into his office and he said let's pray about it really Yeah, so we got on our hands and knees and we prayed about I love that offer I love when people ask to pray over things that I've yeah, but then I did it every show after that

That's what my grandma does what when I call her like she'll like check in on me and stuff like that She's like, well, let's let's just pray about it. Let's pray on this. Let's just pray on this No, is your grandmother to date now because I know that you come from a religious family Mm-hmm. Are they freaked out that you're still out here? My grandma is for sure and why yeah, what do you mean? Why I mean she thinks this is this Is the devil Satan City? You know what I mean? She does? Yeah, it's like what's the only time about it? The only time she was proud of me is when I did a Chevy Volt commercial Really saw it on CNN and Fox and she could show her friends and the old folks. Oh, yeah

She's like she literally said to me. She goes well I don't agree with a lot of that you do out there But if you keep working for good American companies like Chevy then I can get behind that Wow, like what? You know, it's it's the divisions because you know, it's it's funny You and I both Jeremiah have been out in the world. We've got we've been in red states Yeah performed and the people that come out look like the people that you would see in LA Right, you don't really see a difference. I

Don't and it's like it's funny how people think that like LA some sort of like Wasteland or you know some dystopian wasteland where it's like there's crime happening. No, you see kids You know me and and families and and yeah, like you would see anywhere else It's all the same and yet, you know, I don't know. It's it's it's just weird out there, man It's you know, I think maybe the media does have something to do with it Yeah, they think they have a lot to do with it Right carving out some sort of like, you know, it's all about perception or narratives No, thank you about narratives, you know, but we're all the same. I want to meet your grandma. Will she meet me?

I don't think so. Why? I mean Would she say the G word? No No, why wouldn't I okay? Let's you play your grandmother. Has she seen an agent? You play your grandmother. I come over Okay, where does she live in an apartment? She lives in like an old folks home right now. All right, so what room number is it? 201 I would show yeah, yeah, so I'm left Kingdom. You're not knock on the door. I got knock knock knock Hello, hi, what's her name? What's her name? Bernice Bernice? Hey, what's up? My name is Bobby. I'm a calm one of the new nurses No

No, no, no, I am Jeremiah's friend from Los Angeles. I'm a comic. He opens for me sometimes. Oh, how's he doing? I don't hear from him. He's Oh, we're doing great. He's really climbing the comedy ladder and I think he's very talented. Can I come in? Okay. Yeah, so Bernice Bernice. Yes, Bernice. Yeah, yeah How do you feel about Jeremiah being in LA? Oh, I feel like he's a lost soul Oh, you oh, I feel like if he gets right with God and maybe comes back to Kansas and finds a different career path and that would be More in God's storyline for him. Wow. Yeah, right. So you think that like, you know Because Bernice if like Van Gogh, right didn't paint would you think that that would have been a good thing?

I think you're comparing apples and oranges, Bobby. What do you mean? There's one true God and there's only one path to him Bye I would not know what to say. Oh, yeah, you don't know. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Bye There's no it's you hit a railroad. So she's really like handmade his tail I mean, it's pretty she was a missionary in the Cayman Islands Oh, like so she has taught like with like They were like the only white people on the Cayman Islands. Oh, they were like taken care of like they like There and it was very like a unique situation where like they were very revered and very respected because

They were you know, they're rare people who were bringing God's message to them. Yeah, so It's a whole different so if I said to betris Bernice Bernice, right? But trees. That was a stretch Bernice. I was if I said to your grandmother Bernice. I said, um Jeremiah and I are getting married What? What would she do? I You want me to know not as Jeremiah. Okay. I didn't want me to stay right. What would she do?

I mean, she would she I think that she would tell you to your face like I don't believe that gays should get married And I think that you can pray about this and get rid of this. Wow. So yeah, that's it. You know what I mean You can't change that. You can't yeah. Yeah, there's not like I'm as not I'm happy for you kind of thing like she just thinks one way she wouldn't come see you perform Then I would never invite her she'd have a heart attack if she if she Yeah, if she found my youtube If she ever saw my youtube they've my family's been hiding my youtube from her for so many years because she's not that tech savvy

But she could get like she could get on the internet. Yeah wants to yeah And I think that she kind of knows by the way my family talks about stuff Like like I don't know it's kind of like a family who their daughter does porn and they're like no You know, she's still she's doing some modeling. Right stuff like that You don't need to see it like we'll let you know when it comes out when the next project comes out But are your are your but your parents aren't like that? No, they used to be at some point like more my more so my dad, but yeah, but your dad's into it now Because because a little bit well because what you posted on instagram. Oh, I know was a newspaper article

Yeah, a newspaper that you and your dad as when you were a kid used to read every sunday, right? And now you're in the arts and leisure's portion of the knotted grandma Bernice see that I hope that they take it to her I mean that would that would probably be nice because they talk about they talk about in the article how I the guy who watched my special Uh, how I don't uh, I don't swear in it like I talk about graphic stuff But I don't swear and my grandma probably love that, you know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah, so he called my comedy PG 19 Because that's what I do. I don't really swear with my stand-up I choose to be to paint the the words differently with different stuff

Just because I've like never like people it's weird people come up to me like after shows after I'm talking about jizzing and stuff And they're like, thank you so much for not swearing But jizzing, but I'm you say jizzing. Yeah. Yeah, they don't jizzing not swearing. No, and you can be like You know the whole thing and and they're like you didn't say the f word. So we appreciate that. It's very weird Wow, very weird. Yeah But your dad is slowly getting there then He what like just more loose with everything. Yeah in terms of he's much more loose Like where my parents are now is night and day from where I was when I was a kid. Yeah

Yeah, it's literally so if I like because you know, you know, I you know I I wrote a show with my friend Peter and well, it's so we had you on it. Would they watch it? Would they watch the show like yeah, I have I have a network show that I'm working on now, right? And we put you on it. Would they put would they watch the net watch you on the show? Oh, yeah, for sure. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, absolutely You played a gay guy Um, my mom has been saying for years that I only like to play women and gay guys. Yeah Yeah, but but she thinks it's funny. She's like, yeah, but you know what I love about you, too Is is that you um came here because I do remember you being really religious

and really like, um Not scared, but like, um, you know trepidatious. I guess yeah trepidatious. Yeah, and um, it's that you did you have changed You know, I mean for sure. I mean, dude I from where I my belief system to where when I started out here in LA to now is night and day Like I I didn't even really have relationships with gay people or anything like that and like gay marriage back in the day When I lived in Kansas, I was just taught like, oh that you that you shouldn't that shouldn't happen Yeah, you know what I mean? And obviously now like I'm a friend open person. I'm yeah, you know what I mean? Yeah Yeah, yeah, that's great. You what do we have one? Yeah, we got a question

You know what happens at the end of the show? What an unhelpful advice. Okay, you know, you're not a fan of the show You don't know I am I am You try to play it cool. You should play play play. No. No, I thought you're setting me up for something. No, I'm not gonna hurt you anymore Oh, okay. No, I already fucking said that trauma time. Are you traumatized the way I'm acting your body language No, but I think I think that you and I still like I think there's an energy between us Yeah, that I think I would I would like to get to be more of like fun. No, no No, no, nope It's over

What's over? Wait, he wants to get to that point where he can fuck back, right? And when he fuck when he said the four fucking things about me Yeah, if I look like a fucking pillow panda or whatever you're fucking saying we're talking about, you know I mean a flat floating fucking gaslight panda, right? I was just like bringing on, you know, I mean about Harry pot or whatever he was saying, you know, I mean, so I was like bringing on right And I was I defensive about it. No, I Rolled back the tape

I absorbed it, right and I and I smile like giggled about it Check it and I go hey, do you check the gate? Check the gate? Yeah, so, you know, that's the deal, you know from now on um I'm gonna treat you like a human being. This is a cathartic episode for us both Bobby. Yeah, I mean, we're not gonna be like You know, I mean you don't call me crying Oh, man. No, we're not there. Who do I call crying? I know, but just don't go You cry a lot No, but I don't want that kind of relationship where he's calling me about fucking sensitive shit, right?

Oh, it's pretty rare that I cry, but I mean my like Maya sees me cry every once in a great while. I love her by the way. Yeah. I love Maya. She loves you guys I really really really do love her. Yeah. She's um, perfect for you. What a ray of sunshine. She really is. Yeah only positive I love yeah, it's amazing Where's she from? Northern California. Oh, so she's hippies. Uh, yeah, her dad used to sell like candles on the side of the Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, and that's good. Did you know does Patrice know like her? Um, Bernice, Bernice. She just doesn't know Patrice, Patrice

She doesn't like really know her like that because we've only like but you're married I know, but I only go back to Kansas like with Maya like once a year, maybe and we'll see my grandma for 30 45 minutes inside like her home You know what I mean? So it's not like they have a an ongoing relationship. Is it awkward? Yeah, it's always awkward It's always awkward. I can't I'm so sorry. I mean imagine if my grandparents were alive. I wonder how you would um act around them My family's so easy. My nana and big pop like my mom's side of the family I wish that my wife would have gotten to meet them because they were so chill and so loving and so relaxed with They're not with us with everything. I'm sorry. Yes

Happens. Yeah Um Would you come to my funeral? Come on, of course. I think you would of course. What if though Jeremiah? Oh, yeah, what if what if You were asked to co-headline with chappelle 40 000 seats Um on that Saturday the same time that bobby's funeral is about to take place and this is Wow

That hurts The pause hurts the pause the reason why I pause is because like are there other wakes going on? I'm just kidding bro. I'd be there. You went okay. I wish I could say the same Do the thing you didn't come to my wedding which you said you invite him I don't think you invited me. He did. Of course. I did you guys ended up getting us a wedding gift. You're very sweet Well, I got you. We did. I think we did. He doesn't know anything Yeah, yeah, what do we get it? What do we get though? What do you think the gift was bobby? What do you think the gift was? Yeah, let's do a guess a carriage

A carriage a baby carriage. No a wedding. This is all blankets Towels spices. What do we get mer? It was just money towards the honeymoon, right? Yeah. Yeah, how much It was you know a couple grand. It was from my bank account now yours. It wasn't as much as it was. Did you have a fun honeymoon? Yeah, where'd you go? We don't have to tell her Oh Do the thing Bobby Kalala a job by Watkins

Here's my situation. I'm currently working for a large department store chain The pay is shipped and the working conditions are even worse most recent paycheck is uh, uh, also nearly two weeks late now I work in a position where I have access to most products in all areas of the store and can remove items to be shipped to customers without anyone paying any attention to me No one really knows who I am there and no one pays attention to me in my main area where I work My question is is it wrong for me to take small valuable items from the store like jewelry? As sort of a vigilante justice sort of action to counter the act gross mistreatment of employees And the terrible capitalistic ideals of the company and help spread their hoarded wealth from price products to other people in my community

Uh, what do you robin hood? That's what he wanted to say is basically I know Bobby Kalala had mentioned how they never take from an independently owned or small business Uh, but should I play some sort of robin hood type individual to help others in my community? And also myself because I have very expensive medical costs like insulin. You know what I When when I was in high school, my best friend jessica was the asian robin hood and she You know my sister and I didn't have a lot of money or family didn't have a lot of money and for our birthdays If I wanted a baby fat jacket, she got me a baby fat jacket from macy's and always big big establishments if I wanted, you know

Whatever what was a fancy cologne then I always use men's cologne like curve blue water cool water aqua digio Whatever I wanted she got it for me and um I am forever grateful that you know an asian robin hood existed when I was young. Um, I I go ahead I used to work at a coffee shop and we used to put We were but they had these old registers where if somebody who used to be slammed

And when I would play the when I was the register guy I was I figured out how to um ring something up without having To put it through the register. So they would give me the cash Right and then I was able to I would take that cash and put it in the tip jar And I did it. I would probably make an extra For the for because we had to split the the tips So an extra couple hundred bucks

And I did that For years as starbucks. I stole from them for for years. Yeah For years I would get like uh, you could mark things out as damaged. Yeah, I would just go Oh, oops. Yeah, I'd drop it and then it would have like a little dent in it. I'm like lunch Oh, and you would take it. Oh, yeah, I get naked juices. I'd get sandwiches All this different stuff like yeah, just to survive the first couple years in LA, you know, yeah I'm gonna answer like he's my son And I just don't think it's worth it overall like getting caught especially, you know, like

I my son I would say, um I just know what the consequences are But you know, get me some shit. Yeah. Yeah, hook it up. But go wild. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah Give me a list of things they do have the amount of sandwiches and stuff that I hooked friends up with Like at Starbucks while I was there like I would bring home so much stuff and it fed so many comedians. It was great Yeah, all you were comic then. Yeah, my biggest high school crush ever I won't say his name, but I was so in love with so in love with him

But he got kicked out of high school like two months before he graduated because he robbed a soup plantation I was really upset about it. He did. How do you rob a buffet? Yeah He he robbed a soup plant. I think they broke in or something and I don't know how it happened Oh, he never graduated. I thought it was soup like they're taking like Like out of there like why would you do that? Yeah like in bags. Yeah, that's only garbage bags of soup RIP plantations, by the way. Oh, they're done. RIP. They're done. Yeah I don't think that was Jeremiah, what does he do? We didn't hear your thoughts. I think

I mean, just be careful if you're gonna do it I don't think that you should necessarily do the robin hood thing where you're like Giving it like to tons of people in like a community like if it's people close to you And it doesn't it doesn't get like out of hand then I guess that's maybe okay, but you know generally I wouldn't say you should I think if you're doing it for the good If you have the gifting these people and not charging them an arm and leg and you're making a lot of people happy Maybe, you know, do it in little bits at a time and space out. But make some money I mean if you're gonna do it make some money

So not not much money. Not robbing it at all. Not robbing. No, you you you do robin hood it, right? But let's say you you steal like a stereo system. Yeah, you ocean's loving it. Yeah, yeah, right a stereo system, right? You sell it. I mean don't sell it for 10 bucks Right sell it for if it's worth 500 bucks sell it for 100. What kind of stereo system did you have in mind? I don't know. I don't I've never met I've never I don't know what kind of stereo system like bows. Yeah, you got bows Okay, yeah, yeah, and then like, you know make a little money if you can take the risk Little bit Yeah, no cash in baby

That's not a robin hood at all that guy named robin. That's robin. Yeah. Well, this is rob him Yeah, he's just robbing them. Yeah, he's a robbing hood There we go because if he's young, right and he goes to prison, right You can learn from your lesson, right Just see It's not the way to learn lessons. Yes, it is. What are you gonna get a year? No, it depends. You just fucking ask three times. It gets there a limit Isn't it like a misdemeanor if it's like below a certain amount and then a felony if it's above a certain amount

Yeah, because I remember my friend always saying that it's got to be You can't go over. I right. I would just amount. You got to be safe just in case I'm gonna say who but I I was in a um I was acting on something and I was in a van with a driver And we were talking because we had to go a long way And he goes I was in prison for 30 years Yeah, and now I would use this cool union job and I know how much transport people make they make a lot, right? And I go

Why were you in prison? We used to rob banks, right? I robbed like 20 of them And I got away with most of it But I spent 30 years in prison, right? But look at my life now and I've changed. I don't rob and I don't steal And I just thought to myself He learned his lesson So steal. What a great example. So steal. I can't wait for you to be a dad, dude. Yeah No, if it was my son, I would say don't do it. Yeah, right? Yeah, that's what we would say at the end of the day

Don't do it At the end of the day. I don't know if I like this new me What do you mean? With Jeremiah Because as soon as you're gonna resist dude, I know as soon as as soon as I have you did you notice as soon as I threw that out Right as you're even in this pond. Yeah, my energy change. This is I'm gonna say just to be transparent. Yeah Interesting energy Yeah, the dynamic you're right. I mean, you're right because I once I said I was gonna make peace with you

It's like you you shut energy off I know and I and I'm like and I should do you notice that And a fun Bobby fun Bobby went away because I couldn't be you know, I mean nasty anymore I feel like I'm stepping on eggshells, right? Yeah Oh, that's you ugly fucking mutant. Thank you. Thank you You're you're one of the ugliest people I've ever seen in my fucking life You look like a pinhead, right? You do you those freakish circus freak, right pinheads, right?

And they come up with the fucking pajamas on the fucking look like you look like if a dirty Sanchez was a person Yeah, yeah, suck it dude. Yes, but you know what I don't want to you know, we'll see let me figure it out Yeah, we'll we'll find a medium. Well, I'll find out if you find a medium But it is interesting you said that because as soon as I said Um, I want to be nice to him. I just completely I know shut down. Did you notice that? Let's do a part two. Yeah. Yeah. That's how he gets the part two. Well, we go where we do. Um, we're we we're wigs Let's do it and do character work. I mean, I love it like trumpets and do the whole thing I mean, I'll bring my sax. It's a party. What's it? What's a gift? Oh, yeah, I got some gifts for you guys

The gifts. Yeah, but why are you getting the gifts? Uh, what's this all about? That is that is my one hour special that is out right now on amazon prime Video and demand apple tv. It's my debut one hour special and go check it out guys He's a talent and the the album is out I have an album uh for you guys that I brought and What I will say is uh on the inside of this. I don't know if you if you want me to slide this under I don't know Thank you. There is uh

Look at the special things bobby Okay, so here we go Well, you don't have to read it. I want to read it. Okay special things to my wife. My yeah Maya family Dave rath your manager. Yeah. Yeah, great guy. He's amazing tg mark walther raised jj ria

johnny su chef jen Willi love dustin kaufman These are all your reps. No the uh people associated with reps or like the club dustin kaufman owns the comedy club of kansas city Okay, tony hingecliff. He's before me Do you need me to explain? No, okay. Yeah. Yeah. Do you want me to explain? Yeah. Yeah I've been doing he's taking me on the road more than anybody I'll let that slide like like he I'll let it slide. I'll let it slide Does it stand up going on the road with him? Ryan red band?

I've done before me. Yeah. He he has also given me more road dates than you have He's a comic. He we I do spots out the out of the ice house. Yeah, he does That one burns Toward the country and out of the country with brian red band. I've literally been at everywhere. I didn't get of course You know, I mean, he's the town corner of the store right and then I'm next bobby lee Yeah, and then why is eric riffin so close?

He's a he's a good friend and I but what has he done for you? I used to open for eric on the road Oh dean del rey Dean when I started out. Yeah, he got me so many gigs as far as like developing but he always wrote and he would take from you When he helps you he always wants something He Is he gave me a lot of he gave me a lot of gigs. Yeah, he's very Shakespearean Who else who the fuck is lucas hurl? Lucas or he works at the comedy stories. I love him. He works. He works the back bar. He's a great guy

He's a great guy. We filmed tons of sketches and music videos together over the years and stuff like that. Okay, so um Ralphie maze. Why was Ralphie on it? Ralphie, uh, I opened for him in the past and he was uh, the only person who really fought for me at the comedy store. He said, uh, He goes, I won't perform in that original room until jeremiah walkins is a pay regular here at this comedy store And uh, he yelled at he yelled at him and this is before I was passed roadie stevens. Who's that? I'm kidding. He's right there. I love him. It's him. He and I understand why he's on it. Yeah Yeah, mitzi never knew her more for the comedy story. I didn't like you trying

It's funny that your best buddy is not on here. What do you mean? Jamar, we don't we I like as far as stand-up goes. I don't know. I don't I don't look at it like that I didn't put I put people very specific to stand up like yeah, you know what dude? I I'm very blessed to be on Thank you, sir. Do you wear flat brims? Yeah, well yours And then I got you guys some shirts. Thank you. This is cool with the fucking saxophone on it. I love how you're so ready for this This is for ukulele. Oh, that's dope. Like it. Love it

If people wanted to purchase this, where could they get it jeremiah? They get it jeremiah walkins.com. I have a small, um, this is for george All right. All right. So next time you're on we'll have you on the next time what you're The next time you're on I'm gonna go on attack mode. Oh, I love feminist stacey Oh, this one was for bobby, but you can this is a medium if you I'm gonna wear that too. Oh, I wear this Yeah, yeah, thank you Thank you. Yeah The next time you're on I'll be More attacking. Oh be more tacky. Gilbert. I got an album for you too

Oh, because I thought I because when I attacked you and then you started attacking me I thought that your eyes but in your eyes It felt like um that you were being you were hurt. No Jeremiah being hurt dude. I'm around some of the the meanest people On a weekly basis. Yeah. Yeah, like I've I've been roasted so much just being like around like the environment of the comedy You gotta get a little baby ton Tony in here too Mm-hmm, you know, I mean little baby Tony. Yeah, a little baby Tony, man I gotta gripe to fucking hash out with him. Oh, yeah. Yeah

He um I love him, but he irks me. He's moving to awesome. Brian Redman and him are here moving awesome Are you moving? No, I'm in LA man. Okay, good. Yeah Yeah, stay here. I'm riding out. Yeah, ride it out. Yeah, for sure. Anyway, give Tony a round of applause Tony Look at the camera give him a better Give it up for Tony Hitchcliff everybody After he gave you like 50

You're a special thanks to his album. I don't know what's wrong with me. Hey, I want to say I want to say bobby Yeah, that was your best burn of the night, bro Yeah, very good. Give Jeremy a round of applause Yeah, Jeremy Jeremy we at Watson. Hey guys, we have a special shout out to the slap kingdom I have a very special shout out to the slap kingdom That's because I was my line, um to to lino and visa Lino and I were in the military together. Oh, what war three world wars the canadian Great Baltic war crazy. Yeah, the virishian

Veronica, sorry for those people. There were two people we killed Vrishana, but I Veronica. Yeah, and we also the um the one in the Baltic sea Oh, amazing and and uh lino saved my life several times. I had um C shrapnel C shrapnel a bunch of shells exploded And you know coral reef shells and what happened was um, I was on a coral reef with lino and we were fighting the uh the Baltic sea Marauders is this aquaman

Yeah describing the and you know, they they they threw bombs on these coral reef. Yeah, and it All the coral reef went into my ass. Oh, right and lino like he's a medic as well He took his teeth and he every little piece of shard of coral In my ass, he was to pluck it out. That's not too far from what his wife actually wrote on the email. I already read it That's why I said it they she says that lino is one of the people they call or anyone calls if they need help Like he when she was writing this he was helping like a neighbor change their light bulb Yeah, he told me that too when he was doing the teeth. Yeah teeth thing repairs fences He helps with hauling the list goes on. It's interesting that you say that because we had to build the wall

between the slaves and the Baltic marauders And we and and lino built it you helped build a wall to keep slaves in yeah and out. Oh in and out yeah Hi lino. Bye. Happy holiday. Happy holidays. Bye. Bye. Hello slap kingdom We've got lots of updates an amazing fan song Our fan made song if you can stick around for a few more minutes at the very end of this that we want you guys to check out We just want to thank our sponsors very quickly hymns quip tushy and calm Today's hymns is giving you the best offer yet to get yourself. Go to four hymns.com

Slash belly better oral health made simple if you go to get quip.com slash belly right now You'll get your first refill free get 10% off free shipping right now at hello tushy.com slash tiger belly Get a better night's sleep with soundscape and guided meditations calm is offering a special limited time promotion off 40% off a calm premium subscription at calm com slash belly And guys, we will have one last run of merch before the new year. You won't want to miss it We're talking with our print shop right now. It looks like we'll open the store This friday so check out our social media on ig at tiger belly or just go to slap kingdom.com to get the latest information on that

And finally a lot of you have already been enjoying the singing competition at the tiger belly patron For the rest of you we wanted to give you this music video and a reaction from episode one at patreon.com slash tiger belly Jack champ is an early fan favorite, but there are more rounds to go who will win the competition Hey prime members you can listen to tiger belly ad free on amazon music Download the amazon music app today or you can listen ad free with wondery plus in apple podcast Before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at wondery.com slash survey