TigerBelly - Ep 320: Rick Glassman Goes Full Moon Manic

Episode Date: October 27, 2021

**Warning** It's our most seizure-inducing episode yet. Bobby is the boss, he really is the boss. Rick takes umbrage with 'it's 5 O'Clock Somewhere'. Khalyla is the sit-down-to-pee coach. We talk Jim Baker's apocalypse food, a Japanese yam, trade Jewish and Korean fables, and give the "loudest animal in the sea" punchline. Listen to TigerBelly Singing Competition winner Brandon Ross at the end of the episode.Recorded: 10/08/21More Rick Glassman: Take Your Shoes Off Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/take-your-shoes-off-w-rick-glassman/id1457648702Official Website: https://www.rickglassman.comSupport us by supporting our sponsors!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

You're listening ad-free on Wondery plus This could possibly be the best the worst episode ever. No, I think it's the best one in history of podcasting. Do you think it's the best? It is but also the best So let me start then yeah, all right. Can I have more juice in the fucking hood all the juice you want There you go What are you doing? You're freaking me out right now directing you more juice. Um, just turn Bobby's audio off All right, that's the second one. I love it. Wow. I love it I'm sick of having to cut to Marshall Rugg Galler. So at some point you guys take care of this

I'll do the marshals. I would love to Marshall Rugg factory gallery gallery. I'll do it. Yep. Yeah Yeah, in fact, why don't you do a hand signal and that's when you'll give me a cue to do it Oh, yeah, if you need that Ready you're gonna do the countdown. What Jack are you ready? What are you gonna start from if this stuff hasn't been in that was my best stuff Can I say this to you shut the fuck up until I say your name? That's the rule of this fucking yeah Everyone loves that about that part where the I'm sure they love it because the numbers are good. Yeah, the numbers aren't good because the guest is uncomfortable for five minutes I'm sure they love it

You fuck. Do you read your comments? I don't read the comments. They all say why does Bobby fucking try to control the beginning of everything Can we start because all right? Racist jackass you jackfuck. All right. Here's what we'll do. All right, you do the countdown. We started We're in play my theme song Play my theme song or just tell me you won't now. I'll go home right now. All right, so just calm down Don't go home Ricky. Calm down Ricky. Okay. I need you. I'm down Ricky It's the worst thing to tell someone. No, I like I actually like when he talks to me like that I'm gonna do what my mom does and I'm gonna cover my belly. Okay. Is that where she whips you?

That's where my mom whips me. Oh, no, my mom doesn't do that. Stomach belt is what she called. No, my mom My mom took care of me All right, so why don't we do this let's be a little bit more peaceful. Mm-hmm. Let's have a positive energy All right Gilbert doing all yeah, you're gonna be one three two one Don't you guys edit out the ums on this podcast Oh yeah, all right, so you do the countdown. Oh, okay, but that's why I will call I love will take take the show Because that's what Rick wants. I just said my brain was shut off. All right

So I know but this is what he said that everyone's like why is Bobby controlling? No, I don't think you're gonna stop be able to stop doing that. I'm just I will I'm gonna prove to you Well, then why don't you start now instead of controlling how you're gonna prove it? Okay, five five four three two one welcome back to another episode of Tiger Belly today Your special guest is me Rick Glassman from the take your shoes off podcast. It's my second appearance in the It's my second appearance, and it's a privilege to be here Bobby. How are you good? Good. Kalayla. How are you? I'm doing okay, Ricky boy. Let me ask again. Yeah, Kalayla. Mm-hmm. How are you a little down to be honest? What's going on? Having memories of my mom whipping my stomach. Can I borrow that pillow?

Maybe we need you Bobby. I don't like it. I don't like the tone. I don't like any do the countdown I think we need you. I'm gonna do it. I don't give a fuck if I ruin it. I ruin it go ahead five four three two one don't let the sound of your own wheels drive you crazy Take it easy You guys welcome to another podcast episodes of the fucking Tiger Belly's I'm your captain Bob and There's so many we have so many great things in store for you in this program. We're gonna talk about vitamins We are we're talking about vitamins. We're gonna talk about Apocalypse food like survival food. I think that we should do this merch. We'll get in that

we've got The same cast of characters that we've always gotten but they're great and they're very likable. We've got Gilbert on the The the keys you don't look good. I look I'm very tired. I know you run yourself to the ground. Yeah, it's not necessary I know I need some I need to sleep. I need Hawaii Well, you were just there and you will have Hawaii. I have a feeling I have a feeling We've got George in a bad mood A real bad mood. Yeah, and then we've got Kalyla and she looks beautiful. Yeah, and very present and willing and Ah Rick, yeah, I know your name. I

Know your name, but can I do the podcast the way I want to do it because it's my podcast. Yeah. Okay. Thank you Yeah So, um, you know, I Know some people. I Know lots of people Throughout my voyage of life. I have met people from all over the world not to brag from different states like Idaho

Wyoming Delaware Florida Texas Nevada. Oh, yeah. Yeah, Montana Idaho Oh, we would you know you just did he did left right left right up down up down was that subconscious? yep, and

Out of all the people that I don't know what you're saying, but of all the people that I've met in my lifetime, okay I've never met somebody quite like the next gentleman that we have as a guest Number one I had no idea that he was even gonna be on today's podcast until I woke up and when Kalyla told me it put me in Immediate bad mood. Oh, and I don't know why but it just I went right into, you know What I was talking about maybe even thinking about relapsing. I think that's where I think that's where it started Rick I had a great meeting last night this and that I woke up Rick Glassman and all of a sudden I'm like

Should I relapse but here I didn't right? I prayed and I meditated and I you know, I was like see in the present moment and He's just oh, you know, I know he I've never seen him sweat, but he seems like he's always sweating You know, like when I see him at the store his googly eyes with his freaky glasses and looking at me with his cross-eyes Kind of like foam, you know, hey, can we talk, you know that kind of vibe? You asked me here. I know I didn't ask you. Yeah, you're I did not ask you Bobby You control everything everybody run a lot of me here I wouldn't be here if you didn't want me here Welcome to the show

Hi, how are you? I was um, you're gonna think I'm poking fun at you and I'm not I don't think you're a funny stand-up But the relapse thing the way you said it that's fun That's a joke and that's the kind of stuff you should do right like jokes. That's inspired by reality Right showing your dick and pretending to be angry. Oh Is that what you think my stand-up is? Yeah, and I'm angry on stage. Yeah. Oh Oh interesting, so, you know, I've invited you to do shows with me Yeah, yeah, and I wanted to do more, but I guess you don't want to anymore Bobby. Yeah

You've invited me to do two shows in five years. Yeah. Yeah, and both of those shows Yeah, you talk about how great I am and you're gonna have me back right away and months and months years go by Yeah, until you finally have me back and all you do is say you didn't want me here You know, it's a joke. All right, and that's what I'm talking about and that's what you're doing No, I love it. I think you're fine. I love it. I think you're fine. I love what you're doing I think you're so and what and you know what I want to be honest and truthful with you All right, and let's start there honest and truth. All right. Give us a five. Go ahead We're gonna start now five four three two

Welcome to another episode of the truth podcast and being honestly open. That's what our podcast about Tiger Belly We have in the most greatest guy Tiger Tiger. I mean Rick Glassman Sorry, sorry, babe, right We're not gonna keep we'll fix that in a post. Yeah. All right, send it to me. We'll send it to Post right we have a beautiful man. Okay straight from the Valley You live there, right? Yeah. Yeah, and he is honest and open good guy Rick Glassman

Anyway, I want to say this this morning when I woke up I go Are we doing the podcast today and client goes Rick Glassman and I got an instantly erect And it wasn't a sexual erection. It was like my life energy going into the fucking organ What's the difference between a sexual erection and your life energy going into your life force is different? Yeah, it depends on what you're thinking about. You know how sometimes you wake up with a morning wood. Yeah, that's life force That's life force. Isn't that insulin? That's life. I don't know. I'm not diabetic. So I don't know But anyway, I had anything wrong with by the way, and we love diet. That's diabetics. It's yeah

We have we love diets love diabetic. We love diet. We'd like both. We like and I want to say this, okay? What a pleasure Thank you so much for coming And you know also we had a little time thing. I was to get in my haircut I go is there any way Rick can come later and you obliged really appreciate that well blige Doesn't that kind of sound like a golden girl that didn't make it a really funny joke and you're gonna play with words puns We're very witty Let me ask you something. How many vitamins are there?

Essential or non-essential? Well, I'm just saying I'm thinking like there's vitamin a right B, right? Is there an eye? Yes What's it? Lactose intolerancy. It's a lactate. Okay. Is there a vitamin M? Yeah, what steak because every time I take a bite I go mm-hmm No, I have been trying to not eat meat. Yeah, I've been doing I had okay Yeah, I've been doing okay, so I didn't know much about it But what do you think essential versus non-essential is I feel like let me see is that this I feel like they're all it's essential Somebody true to somebody, right? It's kind of like it's oh, it's five o'clock somewhere

And it's true and that thank you so much for saying that that's true, right? And so I think they're number one. They're all essential number two. They're very important for the bodily functions Mm-hmm each one serves a purpose, right like everyone in this room. We all serve a purpose in this room All right. Yeah Gilbert is the um He serves the purpose of No, no, I'm gonna give it no because I Listen, let me just think about it. Okay. I had a joke that I didn't say say it say it now Yeah, well, you said that I accidentally called him a porpoise. I was gonna say you really seal the deal on that pun

Because you stuttered on purpose and he said porpoise instead and so he's sealing the deal on that joke And now that's a seal clap or Nicole Kidman They're the same. Okay. Okay. Forget the forget the vitamins. Yeah forget the purpose It's also often usually not five o'clock anywhere You know, it it typically is no what when is it five o'clock when it's two oh two Somewhere completely opposite. Well, yeah, you're right usually That's an interesting point every thought because the most furthest away in time that That is from us is what 18 hours. Yeah, so you he's right that leaves six hours plus all the intervals, right?

Correct. Yeah, right. Well, that's interesting. Okay, the purpose purpose. What is this seal? It's a clapping with a pork with a seal. Okay purpose. So, um, you're right and I also want to say I have a movie recommendation. Can I just throw that out real quick before I forget? I saw something last night called VHS 94 Very good If you have shudder check it out some dude on fucking Instagram goes you got to watch it. I watched it. It was very good It's scary. It's not scary. It's just interesting and well done. Are we screaming? It's fun. What?

Why are you screaming then? What? Maybe a stomach hurt Did you hear me screaming last night? I did. Yeah, no because I get scared Well, yeah, but it was jump scares. I get scared to jump scares Why don't we why don't we zoom in on that for a second? What the fact that you've recognized that you get scared? When do you get scared? Are you scared a lot? I get scared a lot. Yeah, I get scared at the wind

Like when the when the girls aren't home and there's wind I get very scared Are you scared that the wind's gonna hurt you or does the wind sound like something that might hurt you? The wind um creates noises in the in the trees and the branches the branches rubber poetry Excuse me say that what you said again, but slower, okay? The wind causes the branches in the trees To grace slowly past my window, but try it like this though wind Grazes slowly in the trees. Okay, right? Oh spoke the wind

Grazes slowly in the trees. Oh, I'm not done with my poem making noise Throughout the evening it does Pretty good. Yeah, would you think I could be like in the back in the beat nicks back in the day can't say that word anymore Oh, that's right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Also, um, you're not someone who's very That could easily get knocked down by the wind. So I don't think you should fear it as much You're very low-center. Ladies and gentlemen, that's today's fat joke. You know, it's funny You might not be getting knocked down by the wind seal seal seals that today's fat joke is president by Kalala Coon

All right, all right Okay, what is your problem? Everyone's attacking each other. There's a porpoise. There's a president. All right Here we go. Bobby Lee can't be knocked down by the wind, but he can be by Kalala. We'll be right back Right. Ladies and gentlemen, go to the front rug factory by Marshall rugs. It's got the cheapest ghetto rugs No, no, no, I'm not done. I'm not done with it, right? They're the worst rugs. You know, they're made in China Is that good no, what are you doing texting his dad a text to your dad? Hey daddy I'm on I'm on tiger belly

I'm doing Kalala a favor and we're cutting to Marshall rug gallery and Bobby as you could imagine gives the worst Cut to it. So could you give us five to ten seconds lead us in tell us why you're so great? Okay, all right, you ready in Gilbert give us a ten ten nine eight seven six five four three two one Tiger belly Marshall carpet one and rock gallery. They're like one in the same. We both make people happy We both give people what they want by a rug for Marshall carpet one and rock gallery Thank you so much mr. Glassman. Bye daddy. Thank you Yeah made in China

What tiger belly and the rugs yeah, we are made in China. We're made in China. Are you Chinese? Yeah, both are Chinese you converted or were you born? Converted Mike Pence's program. Is your is your girlfriend back from Europe or she's still is she gone I? Don't want to correct you but technically it's England But is your out of your yeah date? Oh, they're they're out of the European Brexit. Yeah, all right So is your look I say that can I get no take on it or do you mind? Yeah, give them a cut on you know I don't need a cut not from ten, please okay from two to One hi is your girlfriend still in England or is she here in the States? She's in England. Did you miss her? Yes?

Okay, what's having a long? It's fine it hurts her sometimes, but she gets used to it. Have you ever been in a long-distance relationship? Oh No, I haven't never You never like someone from somewhere and thought fuck I want to keep this going, but we don't live in the same place I mean I like I sometimes read about or meet people that are like yeah I met this girl online, and we're in a relationship, but I've never met her in flash Is where'd you read about that? I read it in a newspaper New York Times. You've heard of it No

But I'll tell you this I do know that sometimes yeah I go to New York Times, and I and they give me a little bit of a piece of an article. Yeah, and then I have to subscribe All right, I try that scribe comm slash ties. Oh for 60 days free Yeah, I've done that too where I want to read and I go fuck it. I'm not I refuse to pay it Yeah, even if it's a dollar right so anyway, let's go back to what was I saying give me to one again locked in So I sometimes I'll go and for me. It's like That wouldn't work for me because women like need to be around my energy huh for them to like me I think oh what yeah, I don't think I don't think that people would like like me like let's suppose well

Let's let's let's client. Are you allowed to talk? Who knows go ahead. All right. What do you think of that? What do you think of that? I think that you and I could probably benefit from you know Living miles apart sometimes and you know why I know this is because when we're not apart our Conversations on the phone feel like he's actually listening and there's like legitimate connection Not when we're together he doesn't Right sweetie, so boy. Can I finish my Finish my point so sweet when you're far away. You're sweet. You're sweet, too

close and far You're sweet all the time. No, you're right. You know, I know I disagree with you I'll tell you why because remember I told you when I was on the when I went on the road a lot I don't like talking on the phone at night. Mm-hmm, right? So how is that? But we talk on the phone a lot and you tell me so much about your day and you're so much sweeter You're so much you give a lot of like like affirmation of like love and missing I love you when you get home. It doesn't match that because we

As soon as you get I text sweeter with Betty that I talked to her they're different like There are different languages through different mediums. I think mm-hmm, and Even even with the way Betty texts with me and she uses a lot of gifts that are just she's good at them Who's Betty Betty? It's a friend of mine. She lives in the United Kingdom and There's something and also you message we met with messaging. We're sending each other stuff, too So texting also includes pictures of her dog and these kind of things and then it's like oh hard heart heart And then she'll call and I'll sometimes be like I

Just I don't want to talk to her. I just I just I just I get anxious I don't and I'm whole one of my how close I put I have to put on speaker at the reception You know, I become very Jewish when I have to talk on the phone. You do not like Quiet moments or if there's like space in between thoughts. I Love them You know what you've been good at though is sometimes when I'm on the road Let's say I'm shooting something and I'm like hey, baby. I got a five o'clock in the morning call It's like what 11 o'clock and it's like I can't talk really I gotta I have to go right to sleep right now

You're really good about going get your rest, baby. It's worse. I know but before Years ago used to be like no, let's we have to talk for 30 minutes. That's not true Before you weren't working a lot. So you had no reason to not talk to me. It looks like the way the only thing you can blow That was another slam, huh? You weren't working a lot. Let's be real another slam Uh-huh, but also she's learned how to in you have learned how to communicate with each other better over the years Yeah, we have. Yeah. Yeah, we have. Yeah. Thank you Can I just throw something out? Yeah, man throw something out. What do you guys think? Let's throw it. Yeah, do it

By the way, I just want to reiterate to the people listening right now For some reason this is a we're at night We don't always feel we don't feel Yeah, right second of all it's a Monday It's a weird but we're by thirdly every like when I came in here full moon is probably tonight What look close? I feel it. Are you finishing it or throwing it out? Those are two completely different things until you're both. How are we gonna know? I want to do both. We'll be right back with a word from script. Yeah didn't get Marshall's China rugs

Right it's cheap cheap cheap two dollars a big rug For your family if you live in Anyway, um back. Yeah It's good to be back, um, that's my opener It is What I was gonna say what I want to say is that so when we came when I came in here Everyone is in a bad mood everyone is tired Everyone's frat dodgers are down the Dodgers are down again. You know they're losing

Yeah, I know shut up right that sucks. They're they're a part of the culture. They are the American dream Correct, you know, I think it's language like that that kind of separates us as if our dreams are better or more important I think it's just a dream to be successful at what you do. I agree right and to bring others joy. Yeah Yeah, so are you reiterating throwing out or putting down? Speaking of putting down, how come you weren't working much when you guys first started what was going on? What do you think changed I? Think so I was out I was out on the streets like can I finish my point man? Yes. All right So, um

Back to so back in the day, right there was a point where it's like You go I was playing a lot of video games down here, right? And then you were like we don't get to spend a lot of time with each other, right? So then I brought the video game system up to the bedroom right so that I can be around you But that's not what you were talking about about what intimacy about intimacy no But why can't I play video games and do intimacy at the same time? I do see intimacy would involve you not holding a Xbox controller. Why? Why?

What do you think Rick? I think if you Connected through Xbox as well. Perhaps it could So you're saying I should I'm saying we all have our languages and Bobby assumes that you have his But you are also saying that his isn't important. His is very important. He's taking care of what it what where do I lack? Tell me in what way in the cameras off But true question in the eight years we've been together What are things you feel as though I lack at that I could do more for you?

nothing That feel good. Yeah. Yeah, nothing That must feel good. It really is I can't think of one. Yeah. Yeah, and there's a million things that I could do for you Name five. I would not put a number to it. Okay, just because the pressure of five five right name ten Intimacy what does intimacy mean to you to be present with you to ask about your day really ask right ask How you feel how you are in the moment When I were together when we're holding each other and cuddling right is this that I'm not on my gadgets And that that my attention my attention is fully on you, right? That's something you desire, right?

Also, you would like for me to know more about you in terms of things that you love and your spire and your dreams and your Feelings you want me to know those things, right? I know them, right? About your spear fishing and all that stuff you want me to know about it. Well, not all of it I know I'm just saying right like you get upset when I When you send me a photo of you're spearing an innocent little fishy In the ocean. No, I sent you a video of me swimming with dolphins and he left me on red Right, and it's there's a study that was I've seen it before I've seen the dolphin such a metaphor when someone leaves you on red. It kind of leaves

You on red, you know, like you kind of just get hot and Hey, can you cut that part out where I go? I seen it before I seen it. Can you cut that part out? Yeah, fine If you cut that part out then cut out what when I said art it's about I Gotta get it all in now. Yeah, that's the art No, because when I did that my anyway when I did my thing it just came out of left field Sure. Yeah, I mean speaking of which the Dodgers really need to get no Marcos a Piarra or somebody to play let I know I mean you well I'm on Maro. Yeah, I'm not gonna work here anymore. That's for sure. Yeah

Anyway, you named the one but that was really but that's a big one. That's the biggest one. That's the only one That's not the only one. What's in the second one? Personal hygiene. Oh, that's right. Stop. Stop personal hygiene You know Bobby Bobby, yeah Bobby Bobby Bobby, I gotta say that it doesn't seem like you're wanting Kalyla to feel heard as much as proving that you know what's best and You're almost regurgitating the rules instead of accepting the reality. I don't know. What do you think about that? I think you're on to something Rick. I think you're off off the charts on that

You're not even in the ballpark the Dodgers are the Dodgers. Yeah, the dog. Oh, what do you think the Dodgers need to do? They need to just They need to keep their eye in the prize That's if there's if there's a guy in scoring position a pop-up fly Would be just fine. You can't put guys out there and not turn it over into runs. I'll tell you what I think Let me tell you what I think. I think we should Just up. Let me I really have a thought on this. I'm gonna let you say it. We're gonna just say something. What do you guys think? Yeah, but who's the boss?

Who's the boss? I'm the boss, right? So can the boss say something? What do you think two one? Thank you Start from five five are from ten. Yes, sir for 20 There should be do 20 I'm the boss do 20 There should be a disclaimer up front before anyone listens to the show that this is very seizure induced. I know it's easier counting is seizures That's the case and That sucks count from 20. I said 20

1918 17 I'm kidding. So let's say let me say something. I'm the boss. Okay It's weird it when I say that out loud, but well, then why'd you say it five times? Seem like you liked it. I think what we need right now. I think we're Number one We've never done a podcast quite like this. It's fantastic, right? It's like Fantastic, it's fantastic. It's a mat. It's a mashup edit that in edit that part in do a sound effect to it Fantastic fantastic, but you know like I go if you take a sweet potato and an idle potato and put them together is that a mashup potatoes?

Yes What kind of sweet potato does it matter, baby many colors? No, it matters the Japanese yams are different. They're smaller And that's nothing wrong with yeah, that's okay. Can you say that anymore? No? I'm saying nothing wrong with the small yam Okay, right Bobby. Like if I saw a Japanese person in little Tokyo, you look like a Japanese yam. I've been saying that for weeks What I want to say about the Dodgers is I really think we need to have Open the door to a start letting women play. I agree with you. Yeah, but also So no Because I'll tell you why

They should have you know what? I'll you know I'll back You know, I mean like me a hint. I'll back now. I'll give you a hint I'll back a completely like a league of their own a league of their own I can how about you back this what how about yeah, we produce a remake of a league of their own in a world That's dominated by a matriarchical Society and all the women go to war and the men have to play baseball Who would play Tom Hanks? Tom Hanks is still alive. Okay? Okay? Okay, hold on it has to be a woman then yes

There's no crying in baseball is what I would tell my little Japanese yam But it would be it'd be this you're supposed to cry in baseball You're supposed to fucking cry in and the coach will sit down and pee for a really long time That's what I do when I'm scared. Maybe you guys can help me. Maybe you guys can help with a new stand-up joke That's not working. Okay. Okay ready? Yeah, this is I'm good at this. You're good at this Yeah, all right, so I do a bit. You know my Braveheart bit. Well, so the Braveheart bit is is like the premise of it is um, I Wish one day Hollywood would like remake movies but put Asian people in white parts and in fact I want to remake certain white movies Braveheart. I have a joke about that, right?

So I have a second joke right what they should remake but Asian right so I go in North Korea, right? There's a lot of orphans Apparently on the streets and they get hunted down sometimes and they get eaten now the audience now money Yeah, but the audience now is a very uncomfortable when I say that right then I say that's why I want to remake the movie North Korean Annie Right kind of gets chuckled and then I go what they made a black Annie That kind of gets a laugh right and then I say um and I'm gonna it's cheaper than the other Annie's because I'm gonna save my money on casting There's only one orphan Annie the rest of them are in a pot roast pot roast. Oh Sweetie, it's it gets worse forget it. It's a grown-er keep going Oh, maybe it's a grown-er. Oh, yeah, it's I don't really it just seems like you're I

Don't know do you have another joke that I'm not done with the joke All right, so I'm gonna cast Kim Jong-il okay as daddy. How are you gonna get him? If that's a heckler oh Yeah, that's a heckler. That's a heckler and that's what my response is when I get heckled what I just did I just just freeze which is which makes me. Yeah, I mean not that great of a comeback guy Mm-hmm. Well, let's work on that All right, so here we go, so I'm gonna you know me and cast Kim Jong-il. I'll play a heckler I'm already assumed

You're wearing mustache, right All right, so I'm gonna cast Kim Jong-il. Where's Santino? Hey, man, where's fucking mr. Magoo. Okay. All right. I'm sorry Nice got him got him. I got him. Got him. Did I get him? Yeah. Yeah. All right, so I'm sorry. No, I'm sorry Yeah, I'm gonna cause Kim Jong-il as Daddy war fucks. That's what I call him. Okay Thank you one laugh I'm already never gonna tell this over again. Yeah. Yes, but then I go um

But don't worry about it, right? I'm gonna keep the music the same just change the lyrics a little bit You have Grey Goose Okay, you got a Grey Goose in cranberry imagine a wide shot and Annie, right? It's a hot mark of life just for me Right now, but here and then daddy war fucks jumped into frame and got something with cranberry. It's about to get hot Ah, right then he picks up Annie tilt his head back and eats her whole like a snack a sneaky eating a hamster Then the credits roll down and he's still chomping away at any I've been telling this joke for the last three weeks I can't get a laugh

And scene oh, that's what you've been writing in your little joke. No, yeah, yeah, you know what? I hate I hate the fact that it didn't do well. I'm gonna get I'm not gonna give up on it. Don't give up There's something there, you know, I've learned you don't for me at least don't Don't try your jokes anywhere, but on stage because it doesn't work. You're right and absolutely right Okay, you're the boss. I Was agreeing. Well, you were you were cutting me off for telling you my reasons why Please continue You know, I wasn't feeling like I had it today. Yeah, but you feel it

well Yeah, yeah, I feel it's it's what it's supposed to be. I feel this is what supposed to be yeah, but I did think it's too late for a coffee and Well, I'm gonna drink. Oh, you know in fact, I'm gonna drink one of these Colombo oatmeal's what's your cut off? It depends on where I'm at and what it feels like but I try not to do after the Monday It's a full moon the Dodgers are losing you're doing this with us. Just take a couple sips. It's not worth I've been going I I fall asleep at five like without coffee. I'm just my um, I Have a new I have a new

I'll tell you in one sec probably he's gonna talk about his merch. I have a new merch idea. Mm-hmm. If you guys want to hear it Yeah, I don't I'll tell you about what I was saying. So I wasn't really feeling like I wanted a coffee so I thought oh, I'll have a little weed shout out to Kiva chocolates and Then I decided not to take it because the reason I was gonna take it was because I felt like I needed it Oh, and I couldn't tell well. Yeah, well you need coffee, but what's the difference and it's a feel thing But I brought it with me, and I thought maybe I'll take it at the beginning and then halfway through and then I thought No, I feel like it's I feel like for right or wrong It's not gonna be good enough if I don't take the weed. So that's why I didn't take it and

You're doing just new merch pitch You call me Would you call me? I've been doing a new merch pitch pitch to the group. I thought you said new merch bitch I thought you said coming Let's do it again. Is that what the noise Bobby makes when he comes? Okay Oh, you should that's good. That's dude. That's really good. Oh, oh call a duty

Real good feels good. All right. What's your idea? So I've been watching I like Jim Baker, you know him the Pastor pastor. Yeah, he has a new wife. I don't know her name. It's not Tammy Faye. She's dead She yeah, I think she is. Yeah, but ironically her eyebrows are still alive. Hello I'm her eyelashes. I mean the joke is wrong. The joke. I fucked up the joke I Fucked up the joke Let's do it again. Come on. That's a real person. Be cool, man. Yeah, but our eyebrows are still I Give me a third shot, right? No

Oh That's just still alive Anyway, beep beep so Jim Baker It's like a football player. He has what he's doing is He's selling apocalypse Food apocalypse food like earthquake kits. Yeah, but like in these gigantic drums Right, and I think the tiger belly because the end is coming Mm-hmm, right. I think we should have our own apocalypse food that they're not because they're gonna have flavors and foods and different things flavors

That you know, I mean those people like Okay, why can't you just buy Patagonia provisions because they're expensive and they're hard to get are you new? Yeah, and that's why I like territory foods to deliver my meals go to territory foods.com slash Taiso So what would you want like a gate if we had ten? Let's say we had ten how these generally work is you open it up and it's pretty much like powder Yeah, right and like dried Vegetables and these are the bakers and they pour hot water. I'm gonna you have to rehydrate it You pour hot water in it and makes food for like you're dehydrated foods and packets, right?

So let's figure out what kind of foods we want that we couldn't live without 20 of them It can't be anything like pizza or anything like that because you can't pack a lasagna. Yeah, so it was yeah We you know what I'm thinking the first one is Korean porridge smart Would give me the three bears version in Korea not the language but culturally The porridge is too hot. It's too cold. It's just right Yeah, all right, so those are pigs the other ones are bears maybe in Korea, what would they be? Okay, let me just do that. There's old fairy dogs. Oh, yeah, you hear it. Yeah, if you want to hear it, right?

Long time ago in the 17th century. Can I do it in the accent because it's better? Sure Long time. No, I'll do American if you can say the 17th century. You don't need to say long time ago Like just but in the in the in the fairy tale. That's what it says in the books a Long long time ago in a galaxy far far away. That's 17th century Right in Korea, right? They're lived three bears Mama bear Papa bear baby bear. They lived in the log cabin a wolf shows up He blows the fucking house down combining two stories. No, this is a Korean one three if you count Star Wars

Three IPs right now, right? Then Obi-Wan But that's the wolf's name Oh, not that connect us. Yeah. Yeah, Obi-Wan the wolf cause Obi-Wolf. Well, what? What's going on? What's going on? And the bears are like why'd you blow that our house bitches? Right, we don't have a home now bitch. He's like

And the wolf is like later and he does this run Yeah, right and the bears are not as fast as the fucking wolf, right? Yeah, but they chase and they're pissed off It took them by the way a little backstory He couldn't even find a contractor for years to even build the fucking thing I took five years to build this thing one blow wolf blows down the fucking hole out They're chasing this wolf right the wolf jumps off of cliff. He dies But we don't realize is that wolf dude is the son of a wolf mafia Well, how do you know if we didn't realize it? That's exactly why because it's a part two. Oh

It's a backstory, right? So it goes back and forth. Well now that same wolf that jumped off the cliff is now a baby Because we're now we're starting right number two is a prequel. It's like a prequel, right? Which is where they actually get the term prequel because of the wolf's fur is it's a quilt They would do it and earlier was the prequilt. So anyway, Obi-Wan the baby will all be Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan zero No, Obi-Wan is one Well, I got you, you know, I'm not making this up. This is an actual Korean folklore tale So I'm just going by the book. So I don't know what the fuck you're doing. I don't know I think I'm forcing stuff and I'm wrong. Go ahead. No, don't get in your head. You're doing great. I'm not

I'm just sometimes you get in your head. I don't want you to be getting your head. Okay. Okay. Good. We're doing very well right here Okay So anyway, when he was a kid with the wolf, right? He had a wolf grandfather And he goes Obi-Wan Right 40 years from now, you're gonna blow down these three bears house

But you're not gonna know why and then you're gonna die. That's it Yeah, man, comedy's tough, dude It really is it's hard and we were in a pandemic We were in a pandemic. I missed I missed I missed it on that one. Yeah. Yeah Well, the problem isn't that you missed it. It's that you took you so long to realize you didn't have it Well, here's the problem, you know, one you know, I kept going to see if I could find it Of course, right? I said your instincts. That was your first mistake. Yeah I think your dismount would have been that when the wolf was like, what's up guys or whatever and you realized?

Oh, I don't have it. I got a laugh. Let me pass it over to a professional, right? And what I did was I tried to milk it Yeah, yeah, yeah, you know what you were doing You you you were digging because you were you just didn't know what else to do and then you got lucky and you found something And you threw it away and you tell us an old Jewish childhood fable sure a long time ago in the in the in the early aughts of

1900 BC 2000 BC there was this this evil pharaoh, okay? Oh, yeah And I love by the way, I love those movies The mommy and command yeah, no, I love the mommy, right? I even like the Tom Cruise one. That's the mommy that mommy Yeah, yeah, and the Brendan Fraser that they can't be that I also like any of that one rock one What rock was in the Egypt one? What was that called? Oh the bad scorpion king. Scorpion King. I enjoyed that What was the one that you were saying? I said ten commandments. Yeah, but that's not you know They're remaking history of the world part two. Yeah, I burn holds something. Yeah, I bear notes and Dave Stassen and Mel Brooks. Yeah

Mm-hmm. You think you'll get in that tell me this pharaoh. What happened? Locusts frogs water parts you've all heard that but what you haven't heard is The other part and that is with Haman and Princess Esther. Do you guys know about Haman and Princess Esther? No, I think so Oh, well, you've heard it What do you tell us a story about spearfishing? Wait, let me let's do a vote everyone listening right now, okay? What's a funnier fable mine wasn't a funny fable mine? It wasn't either funny. I wasn't like I was nothing funny Yeah, I wasn't either yours was about Obi-Wan the baby wolf

No, my mind was an analogy on what how the Japanese oppressed the Koreans. That's why they came. Oh explain it The Japanese oppressed the Korean explain the analogy. They stole the rice. They stole the rice No, really, but the wolf didn't steal anything It actually the bears were the ones that were chasing the wolf the wolf know the wolf represents North Korea He came to the fucking bear the bears with the Korean It seems like blue the architect was the North Korean who made a house that could blow over from the wind now I know why you're scared of the wind and now I know why I love you. I thought you're gonna call me a Jewish bitch This is the full circle is a full circle all circles are full otherwise

They're just silly use is there a Filipino story that you would like to tell fable any of you Well, we have a couple creatures that might oh, yeah, you might that might pique your interest I'll show a picture. Go ahead. Well the Korean bet and that the jet the there's one really hot one We have a tick ball on but the bad that's crazy. Um centaur or what do you call? Minotaur centaur, which is the horse centaur is the one with a hundred legs men Go tick ball on it very hot. I would fuck ball. I would have very very hot sex with this aren't you already That's that's that's a walking horse

Yeah, that's a Bojackman. Whatever his name is. What's his name? You made him Jewish. I will our net. Yeah Yeah, that's it. There's a lot left. Yeah. Wow Did they even have horses in the Philippines? He's only good-looking because of his body We don't have my wild mustangs or anything But we have horses that it's not it's not a big horse country, but we do have pangolins Oh Interests you in any way. So that's one of you. That's a part of your folklore That's part of our tick ball on tick ball on. Why don't we pull up the sixth lead watch an episode?

Go to Rick glass don't do it. Don't you dare fucking do it on the top? No, no, no, it's what he does to get girls to sleep with him. Oh wow, Rick. That is Whoa, ridiculous. I said that as a joke on trash Tuesdays. I have them watch My old sketches with John DeWalt Is that the only one what's the story behind this cloud? I don't know Yeah, well, how does he have a horse head? Oh, he just has a fucking horse head here. How about this? There's one called Bob baby She's baby. This is a comedy podcast. I know do you guys have gotten more laughs in both of us

We should take a stab at it Hold on. There's one called Bob. We buck yeah, and it's a pig with high are we just gonna look at the photo Are you gonna say something about it? I'm gonna tell you all right Oh, yeah, go ahead. The last word yeah, yeah, yeah is b a k y a and it's a pig with high heels Hey, come on. That's your podcast partner. Oh same joke, but All right, that's you know what that's the last. No, I was talking about that. I was talking about that I'm about my fucking body on my face There we go, it does the second one looks like Bobby a little like Bobby just now

I just warned Bobby was just yelling Bobby when you put it. It's true. It's true mix that ugly Fucking mythological pig from the Philippines. All right. Is that what you're saying? You know, we I don't think you're ugly You're not I also don't think you're mythological. Yeah. Yeah, Visayan Warthogs are very beautiful. Okay, um, but that's a Bob way back. Yeah Wow. Yeah, Bob boy back. Yeah Lee. Yeah, Bob boy means pig There's no really a real stretch of imaginations out to create these things. It's like a pig and heels Yeah, that's what cares as his kids. That's what you know, uh, all those little body and the horse head and that's That's every culture has their version of a horse head that don't they okay? Yeah, well, that's why that's why the Jews get so many

nose jobs I Want to say that You came up in conversation I don't remember with whom I was doing a podcast and I did this I adjusted myself and they had commented on how I moved the mic with my adjustment Mm-hmm, and a lot of people don't do that I'm I don't know if you guys deal with this ever

But when you're mixing stuff and people don't wear headphones there and I said Bobby does it you're really good at staying on mic So it's not the nicest compliment in the world, but it is one It's I thought of you in number one is a compliment number two to make me feel anything Yeah, well, how could you feel anything if someone else is the one saying it doesn't make any sense when you just sit there When does your show come on on Netflix? It's Amazon Did you not research me I have a show I'm gonna plug Alright, so I'm on a new animated show called inside job it comes out October 22nd and it's got me Brett Gelman

He's finding your daily list Kaplan Lizzie Kaplan a bunch of people. It's a great show. I've been working on it for two years Check it out on Netflix Amazon so we don't have an air date yet. We find out in the next few weeks How many episodes have you done we finished filming? It's the first season eight episodes as we see it Yeah, and to you. I know that so season it as well. Yeah. Yeah Congratulations. Thank you very much. Yeah, you're proud of the show. Yeah Excited. Yeah, do you love so see? Yeah, very much. She loves you back. Yeah, um, she Has a I has a similar vibe to Esther. I don't know if you've noticed this not

Really in in like in liking to make jokes and make jokes about her and she like connects with like busting balls the difference is like She's so she doesn't she doesn't fight back Mm-hmm, you know, but there's a very similar thing between her and Esther so small world I never know when to use this right, but it's a great actress. Nice find out that great actress They share you all share a best friend and it's like oh, maybe there's common sensibilities with Jenna She was on mayor of Eastwood very good in that job Mary Easton

Okay, and okay to you and she's a narcos never saw it so I can't say anything She's in it. That's a fact. She's in the new Lord of the Rings show Is she there's a new Lord of the Rings show on Amazon? Yeah, and what is it? Lord of the Rings. Yeah That upset you that you're not in it. I mean well, I mean I don't think I can get it in anything on Amazon actually I could I could put in a good word I was joking. She's not really in that show, but I could put in a good word and get you in anyway Um, take out when I said that oh thing earlier. Yeah, well now. They don't know what I'm talking about leave it all in

Cool, leave it all. Why not? Let's have one Linear line. This is amazing. Just one thought that we we can actually sit on for 30 seconds. Let's say Okay, try that. Let's have a conversation One thing for 30 fucking seconds. Oh, no, how about this longer? Let's because we're toward the end. Why don't we do this? Can you let me finish what I have to say and then you say something but let me finish what the fuck I have to say I think that's a problem here. This could possibly be the best the worst episode you've ever done I think it's the best one in history of podcasts. Do you think it's the best? It is but also the best what's causing a seizure from this do I not understand how people get seizures what do you yeah?

It's a stimulus thing. Oh Because people keep laughing at me and then Bobby talks and they're laughing at me Well, it's like there's just not a single linear thought So my mind is like different parts of my brain are lighting up at different times in very incongruent That that's why and it's like knocking me back like this. Let me kind of just all right Everyone shut the fuck up until I'm done with it. No show us again what you meant knocking back. I didn't quite get that But now the timing has passed is gone

You know what edit it all out. All right. Let me finish my point earlier today. Bobby said that Eric Griffin looked like a blackhead And I was like that's racist he goes no to say a man looks like a pimple is not racist And what did you say if you popped him you said come and oatmeal would come out? Okay, what does that mean? I don't know So anyway, it's a podcast. I wanted to start called come and oatmeal keep that in so um Um, can I just finish my point, please? Yeah, like a like a hearty breakfast. Yes Hey 10 more seconds. We're almost at a minute on this Okay, this is not the thing

We're not I'll tell you when to start all right so Number one we have to figure out a topic That we get a topic that we can talk about right because I want to talk about something that we all have an interest in Okay, so that we could talk about something for two minutes two minutes. Okay, so let's do a vote What do you like throw out what you want to talk about? I want to talk about mantis shrimp Okay, go ahead you

I'll talk about mantis shrimp. All right good challenge Gilbert you have a voice I'll go to the shrimp as well. Okay, pull up a mantis shrimp and tell us why there's special gillard. I don't want to do mantis Okay, it's not a mantis. It's a mantis shrimp. What did you I got fucked here? What did you I got railroaded here? What were you thinking? I didn't have an idea What were you going to go for nothing? What? Let's talk about a mantis shrimp two fucking minutes guys. It started. I know nothing about us. You're gonna be talking. You're gonna be talking

Hey, this is on you It will give us the facts gilbert and we can talk about why Either they're important not important why they're special. Maybe you don't find them. Well, they obviously are special and important Or this is a waste of everyone's time Well, it's kind of very similar to the bird of paradise in um magic the gathering One green man. Let's you add one color two minutes rick. We can't go into magic the gathering I changed my shrimp bullshit and I want to talk about magic the gathering Gil, what do you want to talk about? Hello?

Yep Hi All right, we talked about it. Let's go unhelpful advice. No. No. No. No. No. Yeah, we're going to unhelp us I'm ending this I'm short. I'm ending this and unhelpful advice. This feels like it's going well. It's going well It's not I think I love it. I think it's going Oh, because the mood that I was in before I got here where I felt like now I'm you didn't move with your mic Oh my god, it's a fake thing you do You're feeling good too. You want to play but you don't know how to how to you don't do unhelpful

You didn't move the mic. If you're all right. That's fun. You know, you're one of us, you know Unhelpful advice with bobby kalayla Eric glasman We didn't even get to the two minutes kalayla. I'm sorry because you didn't fucking pull up mantis shrimp when it was a little black A beta birds of paradise That's the most important thing about it. I've seen this in a movie. Right. What is that? It's one of the most powerful animals sea creatures in the world. That looks like doc williams Willis's dick it competes look go up go up go up go up

It come I'm not all the way up all the way up. I'm not doing well. You're getting back It competes with what? It competes do the unhelpful No, no, no, no here pistol shrimp is that's I mean, that's what it is who gives us fuck Go claula come on get it in claula get one thing in I have a question If we do this, could I have two minutes one minute on uh for two different cards that have a similar thing? Okay Yes, we can talk about the two cards. Great. Go ahead, babe. Let's do it and three two one mantis shrimp the snapping shrimp, right?

Or the mantis shrimp competes with much larger animals such as the sperm whale and the beluga whale for the title of loudest animal in the sea True. It's basically a you but underwater That joke is so good That joke is so good. I like that. Let's just let it seep in Mm-hmm. It's like me But underwater let her do it again and know that there's punch line is there so you can sit and deliver it like a punch line She's gonna Is it a rip your dick?

Lila do it like a punch line All right, so now your turn the two cards. No it hasn't been two minutes do it It's been one minute. It's your turn hit it rick rick go all right first first Some it's like a you but underwater. I want to hear you do it like like it's a punch line I'll give the support for it. Okay. All right. Let's get it. Uh ladies and gentlemen kalila The snapping shrimp the snapping shrimp competes with much larger animals such as the sperm whale and the beluga whale For the title of the loudest animal in the sea Just like you

But underwater I liked it You fucking booed me Two cards All right. Yeah, so I was thinking of the birds of paradise Pull up a birds of paradise pull up two screens You'll pull up a birds of paradise look for a foil might no do a beta birds of paradise and a foil city of brass foil city of brass

Okay, here's the first one Great make it big so it shows what it is 1993 Jesus expensive. What's the second card wow city of brass? Look look up a foil. I like the foils go arabian knights. Why don't we go originals? What do you think birds of paradise originate? Not the plant the bird There's got to be somewhere in the in the jungle in a jungle Wait, there's a birds of paradise. That's a plant. You don't know that. Do you even know your card? Damn

Why are you making that face because you booed her? What are you doing? I just want you to know the card. I know that is a value. Okay. I know the artist. Do you have both of these? Do you have both? The artist is mark pool. Do you have both of these? Well ask mark fucking pool I've been reaching out to him. I know joke. I've been reaching out to him. I really want to get him on my podcast Do you have these core cards? Yes your national bird of micronesia So a birds of paradise Is flying and it adds one color of any mana to your mana pool any color The city of brass is a land you could also add one mana of any color to your mana pool

But every time you tap it which to get the mana it costs you one life Where the birds of paradise doesn't but the birds of paradise cost one green to come out Where the city of brass you could bring out for free But also birds of paradise is a creature. It isn't attacking for much as you see a power hero. It's also a plant Yes, a very very hardy plant that can grow in different climbs But I want to say a lot of people get very excited about About there there's fancy spells and they're big creatures in the combinations But a lot of people forget the fundamentals are everything costs money

Everything costs mana if you have some heavy hitters that give you extra land early in the game It doesn't matter how big something is that you could get out turn seven. I got you done in turn four So these are these are cards that I I do I do play with often I don't have an arabian night city of brass on hopeful advice with bobby kalilah every classman Hi guys, I got pregnant when I was 19 The father left and I was left to make a hard decision I placed my daughter for open adoption to a gay couple. I'm sorry. I'm sorry

You're gonna read it one more time and I did it for a question because this reminds me of a riddle We're assuming That this is the mother Because they said the father left, but it could be the father with custody and he is talking in third person It's you know what riddle that is the mother the mother is a surgeon. Yeah surgeon surgeon. What's the actual riddle? Uh a horse goes into town on friday friday. What's the whole yeah, it's friday. The horse is friday I was doing the doctor one That's not the doctor. What's the horse face thing called dick ball your mom

That's what it's called. Let's do the fucking thing. I got pregnant when I was who you're calling his mom Oh, don't call your mom. Don't call your mom Don't call your mom, dude. You called yours. She didn't even want to talk to you fucking coward mom. Please pick up Hello, oh did I wake you? I'm sorry, mama. We're on a podcast. Did I wake you? No, yeah, it's okay. What's up, babe? Oh, I'm I'm doing tiger belly. You know kalayla and her boyfriend And we're we're doing we're playing around and we're making jokes and stuff and we we saw this picture of something that are you okay, mom? Yeah, I'm fine. I'm just talking because daddy's sleeping. I'll tell you later. Yeah, I'll tell you later. Good. Good night Good night. Do you have anything you want to plug mom?

Uh, no, except that I love you both What about bobby? Oh, three of you actually. Okay. Thank you. Bobby or bobby is tiger belly, isn't he? That's right I am okay. All right. Good one mom. All right. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I love you. Bye You know, she's probably really tired because she galloped all day. Anyway, can you? I Can you Finish the fucking thing I got pregnant when I was 19 the father left and I was left to make a hard decision

I placed my daughter for open adoption to a gay couple Her dads have been nothing but open and now we are basically family I'm in a roundabout way still mom to my nine-year-old daughter This weekend she spent the night and had a breakdown telling me how much she hates herself She told me she doesn't think we look alike kids at school tell her that she doesn't have a mom She told me she hates the way she looks and everything about herself I told her I would come down to her school and shake any kids hand who tells her that and comfort her the best I could I was wondering if you had any advice for a confused 28-year-old who doesn't know how to approach this with her dads

And then with her she's going to shake the hand of the people who are making fun of the daughter Yeah, I think to give him like no a firm grip like don't fuck with my daughter I wouldn't never heard that before Yeah, I think she's just gonna shake her hand. Yeah, let me shake it. What a cruel way Hey kid, let me shake your hand you crunched What would you do if your kid got bullied bobby? I would take him out of school. Hmm. I put him in a different school. Would you try to speak to those kids parents? No, it would be a good podcast you bring them on

Oh, I think I think my kid I think my kid is are going to be doing the bullying Oh, that's what you do. That's a good chance of that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Not if I'm the mommy Yeah, not if I'm mommy. No, but can I just say something this it's it's a very very difficult time For her kid. I think a lot of kids go through. Were you bullied? I think I was a lot You look like you were A lot Not really. I wasn't included, but I didn't know that Oh

Oh, no Oh Sorry, I thought I had friends and I now realize I didn't he didn't know He didn't but Oops, how did that out? I was trying for something. Yeah. Yeah I'm gonna call my mom Your mom can't beat you because he doesn't have hands. She's four feet That wasn't a good job. That wasn't even a good job. Should we edit that one out?

No, don't cut it out. Everything stays in because this is a fucking chaos, but it's okay, but the Lady, I'm so sorry. And then let's end the podcast now. I think I'm done. She's about to call her mom Um that Isn't I mean doesn't matter. Hi ma Uh, what's up? Was I was I ever bullied when I was younger? No Okay, good night I mean, what's the point?

Good night. What's the point? I was never made fun of. No, you weren't. Let's move on Only window. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Good night Okay, ma. I love you. I love you Okay So you weren't bullied you weren't I wasn't no, but I would protect my sister a lot and I would get up like girls as I was commendable. I would fight. I would fight people all I got into a lot of fights in elementary school because she wouldn't stand up for herself and You know, she was tall and lanky and

Awkward, you know rick. I I have to I have to say um, I really enjoy you. I think we podcast well together. Yeah today was um Either it could either be the best we've ever done or the worst. I can't tell I'm gonna I have my I have my um But I enjoyed doing it. What is your what are you thinking? There's no way it's either. This was just fine. Yeah, to me. That's fine. If you thought that was just fine You're saying it's What do you think it is? What are you saying? But be honest. I'm being honest This is our cold open

I think what we just did Is Otherworldly that's that's good and honestly Un what do you call it unintelligible George? What'd you think? Oh, it sounds like that was your like your mean nickname. What would you? Yeah? What would you what do you think? Don't you think unintelligible George? Okay, I'll take that that's actually George and I are probably on the same page there It's if you're into acid trips, please listen to this if you're not trying to take a

A hallucinogen in the form of a podcast do not listen to this and instead go check out the sixth lead On my youtube channel. I'll tell you this. I get a lot. I've talked about this. I think with you last time you were on There's always there's a lot of a lot of like strong opinions when I do one of your podcasts positive and negative There's not that many like just like Oh, I feel like this was the most Out of all the things no. No. Oh no. No, they're gonna come for you. They're gonna come and me and him Yeah, that they're gonna come for all of us

They're gonna tell us to quit because of the the the jewish-nose thing. No, I no no no no mama horse thing No, I'm a horse the mama horse thing I'll be real. Okay To me It's the way my mind thinks I connect I connect to it. Yeah, this is what it is. That's what it is. It's not all over the place It fits. Yeah, it fit in a weird way. We did a lot of callbacks, right? I did You didn't call your mom back

No callbacks in terms of jokes not in terms of Calling people Yeah, I should let me end this with a callback. No, no, don't call anybody no more. Please don't call anybody else And I was just doing a callback to the joke. I just did So anyway, um, let's thank rick for I can't even finish it but I have to say something because no, please No, I have to I have to please stop then leave then leave Then leave you can leave. I won't why don't you leave go ahead? So I know when you were saying that about my mom you were making a joke

Um, and I know how much you struggle with structure But I still want to acknowledge the fact that my mom is the cutest sweetest most lovely woman And the fact that you called her a horse the only place that makes sense Is because I I I have an appreciation and a trust for strong women because I was raised by them Much like a horse So yes, my mother is like a horse in the fact that she is a strong woman And uh can carry the family honestly. She carry. Yeah, she carried me on on her back. She still kind of does All right, bobby's gonna try a joke that kalilah pitched. Let's see if kalilah's writing with bobby's joke structure

Yeah, I said I mean I said the word wrong right the way I said it rick have a quick I'll say the way I want to say it. Okay. I said the word wrong, right? I wasn't supposed to put an s in horse Oh So my mom looks like a whore you saying she's beautiful. Oh That's her joke I said I was it's so mean it's so mean my mom's beautiful and also Oh, man. Fuck a lot of girls. They're cool women do all of a sudden. They're fucking trash It's such a double standard and that's why my mom's beautiful and the dodgers need to have women in it. I fuck a lot

And thank you that's that is the podcast what is happening Guys you can follow kalah like lamb decay bobby bobby the live tiger tiger belly and rick Where can we follow all your things? What's the most important thing we need to follow? uh Just you know the past remember everything that's happened. Otherwise we're doomed to repeat it number two I'd say yep. You could go to ricklivesman.com check out the sixth lead Uh, or why don't you go to my store? You know what we don't go to the store go back Go back and go to number one there and we'll just watch the first episode as a lead out

If you guys want to watch episode two through five, it's pretty easy. There's five episodes 30 minutes total Check it out, but we'll watch the first one now. We'll cut to it and we'll we'll end we'll end this with the episode Just go ahead and play it. Let's show it. We could get us watching it Press play If you're looking for just the right flooring you need choices and at marshall carpet one you'll certainly find them So with josepapias, um, my name is brandon and uh today I will be singing the tiger belly theme You can find my music at grand underscore paw underscore verne on instagram And we have a couple singles out on spotify. You can just look us up. It's grandpa verne

My band is a punk project Um, and yeah, and today I will be doing the tiger body theme, so I'll just get right into it I Thank you Hey prime members, you can listen to tiger barely ad free on amazon music Download the amazon music app today or you can listen ad free with wondery plus in apple podcast Before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at wondery.com slash survey