TigerBelly - Ep 384: Blake Anderson Is Still Mad About Dinner

Episode Date: February 1, 2023

Our guest is Blake Anderson, an American actor, comedian, producer, screenwriter, and fashion designer best known for his role on the hit show Workaholics.Bobby is King of the Jungle. Blake prefers Erik Griffin. Khalyla went to High School with Worf. We talk penis sashimi, territory marking, Tom Hanks' classmates, and church lies.This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. If you want to live a more empowered life, therapy can get you there. Visit www.BetterHelp.com/belly today to get 10% off your first month.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey Prime members, you can listen to Tiger Belly add free on Amazon music download the app today Anderson yeah, we have both have the same amount of followers a thing and um me you would have never really hung out no ever No, there was one time when we went to Some diner after a comedy show. It was like you me Adam We did it was like a group of people. Was it before workaholics? It was yeah. Yeah, you were a dick You know what I believe I believe you honestly was I dick you weren't like super nice Different man this is I you know my Blake. I want you to be really honest with me All right, so what's the vibe? You were just kind of not at all interested in who I was at as a person

Oh, that's the common theme. Can I argue or no? Yeah, it's your life. Yeah. Yeah, now I go argue against it. Sure. All right so He's like Blake Blake, right? Yeah, you know, you're all right. So let's say some guy You're at a comedy club, right and you're friends with somebody and he's like I'm gonna bring four other dudes to the diner. Sure, right? Are you gonna be asking questions to the other four guys? You don't know. Um, I Guess it's a bit eventually That was so cute like you cracked your nose

Yeah, I stretch to my butthole muscle. There you go. Nice. Yeah. Yeah Um, so would you do that would I talked it? Yeah, I mean, I would talk to I would engage with people at the table Fuck yeah, that's the wrong angle Let me try a different angle, right? How about this? Mm-hmm. All right, you look the way you look now back then Yeah, I've been changing. All right. So check this out What about this? What if you know, I'm a sober guy, right? Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah, I've always been a sober guy, right? Where are you then? Yeah Oh, cool. Yeah, so here's my argument. All right. Okay. What about this? I did not seem like it. I

Just have assumed you partied but I don't know. I just look like I do. Yeah, which is cool But okay, I'm a sober guy, right? You look like a partier. Okay, right, right? So right so I'm like, I'm out there like if I get to know this guy, right? Mm-hmm. He might he might draw me back into engaging in the parting way in the dark life It's a dark the dark lifestyle, right? Wow, I put a barrier up for the guys like you because I don't want to get You know, I mean the pussy that you get and the cocaine and all that stuff. What do you think? Yeah, well, I think you had a wrong assumption about me because I'm a really good boy. Oh God damn it. This is our off. Okay. Um, how about this? Okay, let me give you this

All the excuses for being a dick Explain yourself. I try to do it one last try. Okay Back then right I wasn't doing well in my career, okay, okay? I really wasn't and I was in a dip, right? And I was just depressed and I was just an angry guy, you know, I mean and Until I found Until I got to the point where I could let it go, right and realize that this isn't Who I am, you know, I mean this isn't my life if I you know, I mean my happiness

Isn't based upon the jobs that I get and where I'm at in my career and I'd be able to I just I did some inner work I changed my point is is that back then when I was probably hanging out with you I was really bitter and really angry and I hated my life and I hated who I was and where I was and I am I Changed things about myself. So I apologize. Wow Forgiving. Yeah, nice. Wow Yeah, thanks takes a takes a big man to apologize. Yeah Oh, yeah, do you feel better about it? Yeah, I know it didn't feel like you know me anyway, let's start I

Welcome welcome welcome welcome welcome to the tiger tiger tiger belly belly. Here. I am here. I am here I am and here's Kalyla. Here's George You give a good look at Blake Anderson also a like Anderson also a what up? He's from workaholics he's doing a bunch of other shit and You know, this is my gotta plug the new the new movie. Yeah. Yeah, go ahead Brandon Durmer will he try to FaceTime you're oh, that's right. Right. So Durmer I thought you guys were talking about workaholics movie because that got axed oh

Did it did really why? Paramount plus pulled the plug those fucking bastards tax cuts man I know those bad. You know what? It's not that the dream's not dead though. No, it's never dead Exactly. Go somewhere else. The dream's alive. Is the Brandon Durmer movie that he's in the movie. I was supposed to do right Yeah, what they replaced you last minute. Oh, were you gonna be the DJ? Oh I thought I was like driving these two girls somewhere. Oh, I think Kyle my buddy Kyle the director Knew a check he might have swooped your role as he did. Yeah, and the reason why I got replaced Was because of COVID

Yeah, the I'm totally fine as the movie we're talking about. I'm fine and it was shot like height of COVID yeah, so it was really Small crew. Yeah, I think it was like six people. Yeah, and I remember him calling me that night He's like dude. I think one of the actresses got covered or something and he was just like I just can't You know risk you coming out here. Yeah, and I go I Cryed you did you shit. It's here. Yeah, because my dream to be in the movie Well, maybe a sequel you could have a sequel you will maybe he's a great guy. Is he not Kyle or Brandon? Which one?

Why are you trying to confuse me? What are these mind games are playing with Bob? What's up, man? You still mad about the diner? Yeah, and I'm finding a way to get I know but what I'm just saying I already apologized to you man. If you're gonna do this But you have to accept that I'm praying on your downfall You thought it was COVID that didn't you get you in the movie? I'm gonna call Dermot right now because I didn't get a miss call from him Yeah, yeah, call him right now. I need to talk to you because I think it's him You know what this is great, and you know me all those things I think about you know

I mean that are happening they really do happen in my mind. Yeah, I was like in real life. Hey, Dermot Give me give it to Bobby's having a crisis cuz he thinks he got replaced intentionally on the movie. Okay good to me Bro, don't tell him What up? Hey, how's it going? He's coming unhinged. I'm not becoming I got banned from hinge Hey, um, bro, so Blake was telling me Mm-hmm that the reason why you replaced me in the movie wasn't because of somebody getting COVID It was because Blake sat you down and said I don't want to work with him

What Yeah, no, no, that's what it is Yes, that's what I believe Blake over you And you know what's so fun? Let me say something to you this last weekend Do you have a guy came up to me at the store and I exchange number his name is McCone Yeah, right McCone, right and he goes I'm from the dermis. So I was so generous with them Mm-hmm. I sat down with him and I go, you know me what do you let's do something together

Let's come up with some ideas isn't that because he's a creative guy, right? But I did that because you know partly, you know, I know you right and I want you to look good Right, right, and this is how you treat me with this guy Oh, I don't know what you're doing right now, but that's a really good segue to somewhere else. Let's talk about Blake. Okay. Yeah, he's not here I said that I said that your decision Yeah, you were like, thank you, dude. You were like, I've been stressing over this. Okay, my bad. Yeah, you didn't want to show up. That's fucking bullshit. Oh, whoa. Wow. Wanted to show up for me in like the love sense, but the pressure and and the situation of COVID you were you were scared as were we and then when I was like, look, we might have a positive we're scared to break the bubble Okay, you know what? Let's put this behind us. Yeah, I don't know. Yeah. Yeah. What do you mean? I don't know. What do you mean? I don't know. Just not adding up all right. I'll talk to you later. Bye Dermot. Bye Dermot. It's not adding up, is it? Yeah. Yeah. That doesn't make any sense. No, it doesn't. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So when you sat down with Dermot, what exactly did you say?

Oh, I just said, like, you know, you were a dick to me back in the day. All right. So you let me ask you something. Let me ask you this then. So you who do you think is a better guy? A better guy. I'm going to give you two options. Me or what's the big guy that I know? There's some glasses. Oh, Eric. Eric Griffin with Griffin. What? Yeah. Who's a better guy? Yeah. Bobby Lee or Eric Griffin on air right now. Right now. Let's go. Well, I have so much history with Eric. Go to the pros and cons right now. I don't have any history with Jesus Christ, but he's a better guy. I agree. Thank you. The bad guy. I mean, I'll go with Eric. Okay, good. Yeah. Who's a better guy? Me or Adam Devine? Adam. Okay. Who's a better guy? Me or the other guy? I don't know the other guy's name. Anders? Yeah. Anders for sure. This feels real bad. I mean, I believe we could our friendship to grow. We could be friends. I'm not working with a lot other than like a dinner eight years ago where he won't look me in the eyes. Oh my God. Why are you doubling down? More details. You're adding new shit to the fucking story. You're the Asian Ellen? Yeah, I was the Asian Ellen back then. Yeah, you Ellen'd me. You were dapping? Yeah, I was dapping, like Ellen did. But my point is that I am the Asian Ellen. Yeah, you are. I've always said that about you.

I know, but can I say, let me defend Ellen. I wanted to tell you that that night, but you wouldn't let me talk. All right, let me defend Ellen then. Okay. Okay. Right. I'm going to defend Ellen, right? Okay. You can obviously tell she's not in a good place in her heart. When you treat people like that, right? Yes. There's something going on with her, right? And she's self-centered and she's, you know, probably not in therapy and not working on herself. And she's in a lot of pain, right? So why can't we, you know, and I already apologized. I said that I was in a lot of pain. I admitted my frailties and, you know, my wrongdoings. You did admit. I made amends. But you still have to be punished. I know. I lost a movie. I know. That was your punishment. And I had you on my podcast. Well, this is, this is big of you. Yeah. This is my, this is my amends to retribution. Right. Yes. Who else was that? Was that other guy? Jesus. Was that other guy at dinner too? The other guy from workaholics? Adam was. I know Adam, the other one. Oh, Anders. No. What's his name? Anders. He wasn't there. Ders was not there. So he has no history with me. None. Right. Yeah. And then did I treat Adam divine like shit?

No, you were treating him okay. Because I think Adam had been like on some shows and was a comedian. Oh. More details. I see. I see. All right. More details. Yeah. I can't let this go. I'm so sorry. You guys, I'm sorry. We have to, we have to get past this. You passed it. I'm not. Yeah. It sounds a little bit like you. Back then. Back then. What the fuck are you doing right now? Wait, you said eight years ago? Might have even been more. It had to have been. Yeah. I want to say it could have been 10 to 12. Oh, yeah. So 12 years ago. This is before me, pre-me. So before you. Yeah. Right. So you're right. No. What was I like back then? You're doing it again. What? Like we have a guest on and you are not getting to know him. This whole thing has been about your mistake. Okay. Listen. Let's stop for a second. Yeah. This is weird. She god did that. She god did that. Right. Yeah. And you know what? I did that with my mind. Yeah. It's a scare tactic. Yeah. Yeah. So.

Oh, that's fine. Yeah. That's fine. All right. Now it's double dead. Oh, that's a fucking from a. Yeah. What do they call those? June something. Yeah. Junabi. Junabi. Yeah. Wow. You know that, but you don't know people's kids names. Crazy. Crazy. What's important? All right. Listen, you're right. Everyone's right. So let's move on. But here's another thing. This is going to go on for this podcast is going a little longer. All right. Yeah. I will get to know him. Right. We might even edit some of this stuff out. I just this is just for my own personal thing. Growth. Growth. All right. Yeah. Cool. So here's the deal. Okay. I'm sorry to you too. Okay. But I have to say this to you now. Right. I really do love you. Wow. Right. And I out of it. I trust you implicitly. I really do. Do you think that I love you? Yeah. Okay, good. Because I do. All right. I love you as well. I love you as well. Let's move on and I apologize. Give Blake Anderson a round of applause. Thank you. She's great. She's a friend of German's new movie and he's killing it.

Feeling good. Feeling good. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. When you're at your best, you can do great things, but sometimes life gets you bogged down. You may feel overwhelmed or stressed out or like you're not showing up in the way you want to. That's why here at Tiger Belly, Bobby Cloud on myself and George, we tell everyone to use BetterHelp. We've had a lot of tough things happen earlier in my life and, you know, I carried that baggage with me through life and I've been able to release that stuff and talk about it through BetterHelp online therapy. It's changed my life. I'm free now. You know, the trauma that's inside you stuck in your body, it gets released. Yep. And these therapists are trained to help you figure out what's causing these challenging emotions and learn productive coping skills.

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That's BetterHelpHLP.com slash Belly. It's online therapy and it really is the best in the business. So, hi. Hey, what up? How are you? You're a new man. Yeah, thanks for being on the show, Tiger Belly. Oh, so fun.

Yeah, I like your style. Thanks, man. Yeah, man. How old do you know, Blake? How old? Yeah. I'm 38. Shit. Killing it.

Looks young. Young, killing it. Bro. Dude, I'm not young. I know, but look at Mark. You have that Mark Smalls' vibe and you look younger than him. Oh, yeah. Okay.

You know what I mean? He's very funny, by the way, but no offense, Mark. You know what I mean? You're a funny guy. But my point is, is that, and then where'd you grow up? I grew up in Concord, California. It's like Northern California, East Bay. Let me, is Visalia near there?

I believe so. I've never been to Visalia. Have you heard of it? I have. Yeah. Where's Concord grapes are from? I believe that is New Hampshire. There's like two, there's two Concords.

And I think the one that makes the grapes is the other one. Oh, okay. There's probably more than two Concords. There's probably a lot. Is that why those two guys, are they from your hometown? No. The guys that played the guitar, the flight of the? Flight of the Concord?

Yeah. No, I think they're from New Zealand. Oh, they are? I always thought they're from Concord. Yeah. They're not from there? No, that's not our accent. Your name is from there?

Tom Hanks. Oh. That's all he needs to say. All you need is one dude like that. Yeah. From your hometown. It's Endgame. What's Poway?

Poway? Tom from Blink 182. Tom DeLong from Blink 182. And Stephanie Seymour. Oh, she's a big one. Guns N' Roses. Guns N' Roses. Axl Rose's ex-girl.

She's a supermodel. Supermodel. Whoa. She was two years older. And then Tom DeLong was two years younger. And I didn't know either one of them growing up. Dang. Rockers.

They're both rockers. Yeah, they're rockers. Who do you have, Gilbert? Herschel Walker? Oh. Oh, our senator. I mean, we are from the University of Georgia. He lost, right?

Yeah. Mine is Manny Pacquiao. Oh, that's true. He's from Cebu. He speaks Visaya. Is he from Cebu? So he's from General Santos, like right a little bit south. He's from the south.

But he's from that island? Not from Cebu. Down south. By like 20 minutes. A different island, though? Yeah. You can't claim them. Wow.

I have to. No, you can't. I look cute. We speak the same dialect. It doesn't matter. He's not. You know what? Fucking.

Atlanta speaks the same dialogue as San Diego. Oh, I have one. That's true. Language. Language. That's true. That's true, right? Oh, good point, right?

Good point. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. From Blair High School, I have his name is Lee Merritt. And you can pull him up. He was a Maude Arborist. Never heard of him. He's a lawyer. He's like one of the.

He's a lawyer? He's a freaking. A famous lawyer? Yeah. We have lawyers too from Concord, right? Yeah. We have Charles Strawberry's son. Okay.

I'll take that. Yeah. Look at Lee Merritt. My first client. He's a notable alumni here. Notable alumni from what? Kermit Johnson. Oh, my God.

You're on it. Wow. That's not you. See, I'm fructible. Wow. Wow. How sad is it when you press your Wikipedia? My face comes up.

That is. You did that. How do I do that? How do I do that? Doesn't that make sense? I'm not sure. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. How do I do that? Doesn't that sound like him? You can fuck with Wikipedia. I don't know how to do that. I didn't do that. I didn't do that, man. Wait a second.

You have a Pulitzer Prize-winning author. That's a playmate. And then there's me. A playmate. Jesus. I knew about that playmate. A playmate? Yeah.

That's from your high school, though, right? Blair. Blair High School. We don't have a lot. It's like, look. Star Trek Next Generation. That's my dude. My dude.

Oh, my God. Wharf, baby. What do you fucking ask? I didn't even know that. I didn't. Oh, my God. Wharf. It was with the pixelation of that guy's mustache.

Yeah, what did he do? That mustache was illegal back then. Yeah. It was too sexy. It looks like the spray paint from, like, Microsoft Paint. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. That looks weird.

Yeah. What's going on there? Wow. Wow. He's handsome, though. Wharf. So, from Blake. I mean, that's your name.

From Concord. Is it Concord High School? I think that's, I could be totally wrong. I think that's where Tom Hanks might have went. Wait. So, what's the high school called? I went to Clayton Valley High. So, look at Clayton Valley High alumni.

Okay. That's what you have to claim. Oh, it's going to be me. I'll be there. You think you're number one? Let's see. I hope so. If you're not honored, dude, we're going to laugh so much.

It's going to be me with a picture of, who knows, though? Let's see, let's see. It's going to be a picture of Adam. Sorry, I'm pulling up their website because they don't have a Wikipedia. They don't? Wow. They don't have a, what class for you? O2.

Let's go. Oh, we graduated the same year. Look at that. O2. Let's go. On times. It was. No.

Wait. Oh, there I am. Where? Oh, but this is just listing who went. Oh. No, no, no. This is not. This is online.

Are we like doxing everyone? This is online. Yeah, you don't have any. You're the only, you're the biggest guy that came from there. I would have to say that. Yeah, probably. Yeah. Go power high.

See what the notable alumni. Wait, where did Tom Hanks go to school? I thought he went to Concord High, but I don't know. It's okay. It's better to be the only guy. No? Yeah, I don't know. You have kids?

I do. How many? Two. You have two kids? Yeah. Two daughters. No. Yeah.

Are they twins? No. They're very far apart. How many years? Like eight. Wait. So did you have one of your kids before? Workaholics?

No, during. During you had it? Yeah. All right. Power high. You can zoom in. Am I on it? Yeah, Bobby.

There we go. Up there. Notable. Your favorite photo. Wow. Yeah, and then. Look at all the people who went there. What's San Diego?

You know what I mean? You would think. Yeah, I guess you're right. There's a lot of San Diego. The athletes. Look at Brian. Tony Gwynne. Is that good, right?

That's a baseball player, right? It's like the best Padre ever, I think. Wow. So that's a good one. What else? Tina. Tina. Oh, it's cellist.

Fuck that. Fuck that. Fuck that shit. All right. Cellist. A lot of athletes. A lot of athletes. A lot of baseball players.

Who's that? That's Tom Dunlong. That's Tom. That's a big one. That's a pretty big one, dude. To have the, come on. 182. Yeah.

You went to school? Is he bigger than Worf, though? Worf. Worf. To me, Worf is bigger. Really? Shout out Blair Hatch. I'm a huge next generation fan.

Are you? I've never dabbled in any sort of Star Trek. Okay. Can I tell you something? Absolutely. And do you want to be friends with me? I do. We're getting along?

I think so. I think so, too. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And I want to say this, too. From now on, in life, every time I see you out there, I'm going to get excited. All right. Wow.

I really will. Okay, cool. We'll hug. We'll talk. I love it. We'll do the whole thing. I love it. Okay.

Maybe I'll see you out and about. We will. At the cha-cha lounge. At the cha-cha lounge. Yeah, come to cha-cha. Okay. Okay. So, next generation.

All right. Second to the last episode is an episode called The Inner Light. The Inner Light? That's what the episode's called. Okay. Okay. Okay. Watch that one episode.

And I'll be hooked? No, but, you know, Adam Egett from... No, you won't. Adam Egett, the guy that used to book the comedy store. Yeah. He saw The Inner Light, and then he saw every next generation and every Deep Space Nine available because that got him hooked. That was his entry?

Okay. If you don't like The Inner Light, you're not going to like the concepts because it's not great, you know what I mean, CGI and special effects, but the writing is like, you know, you know, just high sci-fi. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. It's pretty trailblazing. I think so.

Yeah. Do you like sci-fi? I love it. Me too. I love it. That's why I'm like, it's weird. I've never dabbled. You should dabble.

I got to. Because it's better than Star Wars in this sense. Well, this movie, I'm totally fine. It's kind of sci-fi-ish. Yeah. It is. What's the sci-fi in it? Well, it's about this Jillian Bell.

She like loses a friend and she's like kind of goes out, they were going to celebrate this business they sold. So she's going to the house that they were going to celebrate at in the desert. And did I say her friend died? Yeah, you did. Okay, cool. We can say it again. Her friend who passed away ends up visiting her as an alien at this house.

Whoa. Yeah. So let me ask you some questions. She was an alien the whole time she was on earth? No. She was a regular human being. Right. She literally died.

She literally. Well, in the movie. In the movie. In the movie. In the movie. Yeah, not in real life. Yeah. Well, I don't know.

You get COVID times. You don't know, man. You're right. You're right. You're right. Good, good, good. Good point. She might have.

She could have died. Yeah. So she was in the movie. She was a person. She died. And now she's back, but she's now in an alien life form. She looks like an alien. Yeah.

No, she looks like herself. Right, right, right. So I'm watching the movie. Like, is she an alien? All right. What's going on? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so what?

When she died, an alien was observing her and goes, I want that body? Or something. That's kind of what it's it. Because I think the alien is on earth to like observe like grieving. Oh. Oh. I love that. That sounds like a Star Trek.

Yeah. Next generation concept. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So this is the episode where Diana Troy is the ship's counselor. She's half beta said. And she.

I love this. And beta says they're telepathic. What do they look like? That's not the. Like human. Regular. They look Greek. Yeah.

Okay. There's a bunch of Greek people. Yeah. Yeah. They're like. Black curly hair. Yeah. Hairy arms.

They never show those shots in the fucking thing, but I assume. Yes. But anyway, she's sleeping on the enterprise and a little tiny light, right? It's like going through space. It's like a little life form. And it goes, oh, look at the ship. So it goes into the ship, sees her sleeping this little light, and he goes inside her. And she wakes up.

What? Through what orifice? Yeah. How did it enter? It's television. Yeah, I know. I want to see it. I know.

Me too. Probably the fucking Greek pussy. Damn. Oh, Greek pussy. Damn. It went through the Greek pussy. She got a little. Which is a lot of hair to go through.

I know. It's a forest. He couldn't get in there, but he finally gets in there. Good. She wakes up. Pregnant. Oh, he did go through the pussy, the little light came inside her. That's weird.

That's weird, right? She's pregnant. And then, but the pregnancy is accelerated. Oh. So three days in, she gives birth. Oh, damn. And everyone's going crazy. What the fuck?

You know what I mean? They say the F word is. What the fuck? That's the card. You know what I mean? Beam me the fuck up. Yes, so and then the baby is born in a week. He grows to be 15.

Oh, damn 16. And then he leaves, but before he leaves, he turns back into a life form and goes in her mind and goes, I just want to experience. What's it like being. Rape. What is that? That's true. That's true.

That's true. That's true. That's true. That's fucking true. Yeah. I remember that little light bulb. The voice was Cosby. She was sleeping.

She was sleeping. Damn. Yeah. Yeah. That's so deep. Wow. In fact, if you turn up the volume, right in the night that episode, you hear the light bulb go.

Hey, hey, hey, he says, Hey, hey, hey. Okay. I'm trying to think how. Like, I just feel cosy and I've been a while since I've heard him talk. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So anyway give me a Greek, sleepy Greek pussy. Sleepy.

That's the title of this episode. Sleepy. sleepy. Greek pussy. Right. Monetize. All right. So.

It's not monetized, you said. So my point is, is that episode is the same kind of saying because he's, you know, this little alien life form is living as a human or a humanoid and it goes okay I get it I love you guys you guys are great and I'm gonna move on to a different right so same time go get another one yeah my next ship right and also as being a little light you know I mean like you could probably rape easy yeah right you're you can go in and out of doors and and walls because that's what it can do oh he can right the weight rape whistle wait she blows a

rape whistle and the organs go God feel it though but he's like swimming through the Ruge of her vagina what's rude it's like the rib part on the inside but that's actually a medical term Ruge Ruge it's like a Ruge love but yeah but that's a scientific okay Ruge I've never heard of that body part yeah Ruge it's not yeah I feel like I know vagina is very well like if I stuck my finger in your vagina can I go oh you have a good Ruge when you touch the walls does it not feel like bumpy and oh is it yours is bumpy bumpy but it's like it's got you know it's got structure I don't have one it's got structure oh you've never been

in one either I've stuck my finger I'm like oh this is not I've never felt bumps one bump the clip but that's you felt structure no but I just feel moisture and skin you're not paying attention you're not paying attention this is he blacks out you've never even okay Bobby no all right you've touched my Ruge is what I'm saying you have a beautiful beautiful Ruge yeah you know when I stick my finger in your vagina it's like what the avatar creatures do with the other plants and stuff they connect yeah we're not together by the way we're not together anymore because it's awkward because he did see me out

that cha cha lounge on a date oh oh you see another guy with her yes it's a friend of his I see what you're I see I was withholding some information back man let me ask you something yeah this is excited you got so perked up man I did get perked up because I feel like this ask him who's a better guy you are that guy I feel like this is a part of his sabotage again and years ago I'm making chess moves I know it hurts all right so let me connect may I ask some questions wait till I clip all that rape stuff out of this interview your career is fucked so Blake did you go to the Cha Cha Club with this guy no I went with

my friends you were friends did you know he was gonna be there no no are you friends with this guy yes is he a writer yes okay and when you saw her did you know who she was yes okay did you know who he was yes and they're just alone I believe so okay last question okay who's a better guy he is you are you seem like a really yeah who's better looking real that hurt what you just now what you just did there right you went hurt more than anything I've ever heard of my life who's who's better looking at like a duh that's your version of duh right him right him I mean conventionally handsome yeah I think

you're cute but like dude let me say something do you know you think in a western way I do I do I'm so western I know I'm right if if right if we were in fucking panda belly and I was a Chinese dude with a fucking podcast in in Shanghai right that's a great but panda belly right and you're some like you're on workaholics but hold on all right yeah and you were all right that's and then you probably a pretty dark show yeah and you probably say that I was better looking maybe yeah if you're in Shanghai yeah probably yeah all right so um let's talk about the Roomba Roomba yeah yeah yeah can I can I stick my

fingers in and feel your fallopian tubes no no is that too far back yeah I bet um LeBron James can you get back there yeah probably especially mine right so you think LeBron James if he had sex with you that he would be able to hit his head of a penis with it he'd come out of my mouth oh yeah damn so there is scientifically look at the ridges on the cervix right there in the vagina yeah yeah that looks great yeah how far back the fallopian tube is Bobby holy mo that's pretty bad yeah yeah that's beautiful it really is interesting yeah I think the fallopian tube would be delicious oh to eat I mean because look what's inside a

lot of strands most fibers like a pomegranate yeah sweet yeah it does look pretty appetizing it looks pretty the whole thing does kind of yeah it's very Star Trek yeah it's very Star Trek yeah um do you do you prefer do you like eating that badger do I like they like yeah oh yeah oh you do you do you I do oh yeah you good I think so I've never lived my own but I think have you asked to have my badge click or have I asked if I'm good yeah yeah yeah no have you oh yeah what do you how do you say it how do you present that question did you like that I go am I good at eating your vagina and you know what they do what they

do what he did what in Shanghai it's a guy yeah so I'm so good at eating pussy in Shanghai you gotta believe yeah I either mine yeah yeah yeah I have an eastern way of doing it hey that's cool oh okay you're very American about you about it what do you mean you're it's it's standard it's great it's fine it's standard like it's the gold standard it's yeah it is the gold and you know why yeah because you're sweet about it I think dudes like who go in like bro we do is to go in aggressive thinking they know how to do it usually never know how to do it right like they're terrible you need an artist yeah

you need someone who's gonna use and listen and be sweet about it yeah it's such a delicate little thing it's a delicate thing in there yeah but the top that I because I don't have one the where the clit is that the most sensitive area I would say yeah and just the entry of the vagina too yeah yeah back there it's like he says no man's land yeah no man so yeah you don't feel a lot back there I said six that's our size I'm like size queens I'm like are you just looking to just feel impaled huh because like all of the nerves are kind of in the opening yeah I'm learning here buddy yeah no I'm yeah I am eating this up

great have you ever said like stop yeah but like that abruptly how would you do it redirect yeah yeah yeah yeah it's terrible when it just feels like someone is like like wants to like swallow your clit hole it's terrible feeling yeah it's like yeah a couple of months ago I was with a girl and I and I she was giving a blow job nice and I said stop but I grabbed her pits and pulled her oh was it that bad she was teeth grinding or she just didn't feel the great me yeah yeah so I just went okay from the armpits up probably not is that not the way to do it that's a lot of power in those two yeah yeah yeah yeah it's like

I'm like you're using the force like Magneto made out of metal and I was I think it's really polite did you just hate the way she was doing it no just let's go to the next phase oh yeah that's pretty much what I'm not we begin the next you hate that I feel like that's what Shim Lim does yes but he doesn't do the pits he just like you know what you probably didn't why can't I can't have an orgasm through it that's true you cannot I can I'd really yeah yeah it takes an hour it's so demoralizing yeah that's for a girl or you just like what do you mean demoralizing like nothing I

like I want to pump chump I want to feel like a champion every time I yeah but when you're sophisticated down there you know yeah I mean who sophisticated you for me me oh yeah yeah you got a sophisticated day yeah like if I was it's tricolored would I be a miss you Neapolitan yeah that's what I say I like what colors yours standard white it's well let me ask you something be real okay white standard if I had it in front of me on a plate right I still attached to him what colors the plate oh yeah that's for true right right black oh that's not good with presenting food on black plate but when you have a white item on

it as pale as his are you good at plating yeah I would put a lot of white stuff on it like a white male okay with it cute be like if I was serving your penis as a meal like we're in the menu right now and I would put like pep like a red on top of it as a seasoning it's really like a freak is like and also black truffle on a plate slices of black truffle on top of it right that's cool and then I would put like a little you know how some days they put like a little dab of a you know I mean I don't like it you know like a chipotle dollop a dollop of a sauce yeah right on top of it but a completely different color like

a red color red color right so black plate white penis black truffle right yeah and then um maybe like a microgreen and a stakes knife like one of those ones from like out back yeah yeah yeah big ones yeah and college like even today all of my utensils are from out back I would just get like leave out by like jingle jangling because I just was a broke college get so I stole all of my utensils from out wow that's a good you could do that everywhere everywhere but they had the good knives yeah their knives are pretty good so anyway when I'm looking at your penis here as like I'm you know I put a bib on of course I go

oh this is Michelin Star Wars is nice right uh-huh your penis is there right and then I'd be like I wouldn't go it's not completely white I go other section of those that's a little tenor would I say that yeah probably yeah exactly like are you saying like is it spotted no I'm not spotted but there's always a ring yeah there is on the stem right on the shaft on the shaft part I don't think there is a ring oh it's just completely well yeah now let's see you're at a restaurant I want to try to be what my penis would look like on a plate what would be out back for sure out back steakhouse it's in the middle of a

blooming onion yes absolutely oh that's so rude so it's basically like the best appetizer right but they don't have to go what what is this what is this in the middle of my the thing I ordered no it's kind of yeah it would look cool it looked like a spiky like pubic mound or something all right yeah as a waiter what would you say I go what's this I said well that's the catch of the day oh you so I see did you catch this studio city yeah no burbanks oh yeah yeah that's worth a good outback that's great I imagine my penis would come in a bowl but there's like also although like a thousand other ones you eat it like

cereal oh no no no no no it's more special than that oh thank you thank you so much see that's what I need it is like artistic my penis is artistic yeah really artistic and it also like shape shifts whoa this is his everyone in here's penis is shape shape no no no but yours it's like sometimes it just takes on a completely different like persona yeah persona damn he's acting yeah it's a method actually yeah yeah it takes his roles very seriously yeah oh so it does have a you know I mean not you're not saying erect no anyway like even if it's fully erect there's sometimes where it just feels like it's a

different penis or that maybe it's gonna be real played for so many oh you got the Daniel Day Lewis cop thank you so much and that's the best couple but you give yeah I love him as a actor yeah he's great you prefer acting or live shows and stuff acting yeah yeah for sure yeah acting is do you get nervous though yeah okay nervous for sure the word you know the worst part is what is so I was on Magnum a couple weeks ago and I didn't memorize my lines that good yeah I got you sometimes you go I'll memorize it on the van mm-hmm have you done that right so just reading it in the van right and then when I showed up on set it was like

more people on set than normal that been on the show before yeah and all of a sudden I was just like when panicking oh did you like break out in a sweat a little bit yeah and I the two guys on the show I'm very good friends with that's good and I've worked with the director before right and I know the camera man everybody right but still they went to rehearsal and I literally normally don't do this but I read it off the page oh okay yeah I mean what are you when you rehearse before you shoot are you completely memorized no you read it off the page yeah even when you're like blocking yeah oh good I'll do it to the

last second oh you do yes why I have a bad brain yet me too yeah yeah me too well I find that like the more you work the easier it is to memorize but like if it's been a while since you've been on a set it's like it's a muscle memory it really is it really is yeah yeah cuz I've had gaps of like not working enough for years yeah and then all of a sudden you get something you're like oh can I even do this yeah yeah am I boring you no not at all I don't want to borrow you baby don't call me baby anymore yeah oh that's true we're not gonna do that anymore every time I am on the phone with I know you know it's probably a guy

because every time you know I'm on a phone with a guy you go babe babe I love you bet you just go crazy love it and it's the guys I was like are you guys like for sure broken like you always and you know you do it intentionally you do it on purpose you know Jane Goodall you know Jane Goodall I think well guess who Jane Goodall is newscaster nope second good all senator no forget it animals animals oh okay so Jane Goodall was the white lady that lived in Africa and hung out with the monk chimpanzees yes grill is in the mist grill is in the mist yes and when the head chimpanzee the male the

alpha male he does this that's my hey babe yeah I could see that what are you trying to accomplish in that moment to let them know that we're done but I'm still king yeah okay I'm still king of the jungle all right intimidating you think so yeah yeah yeah and I just don't know I'm because am I not gonna be a part of your life for the rest of your life you are there we go okay so I got to let them know okay you know I mean what would you do with my girl I don't do nothing I stay out of your way and you wouldn't squirt on them right yeah a mark like a mark okay like what like tigers do when they on a rock to let the

other tigers what if your girls did something intentional when I was like why I I don't live here anymore but I did see that there was an intentional leaving behind of a pair of earrings on my bedside interest before I moved out and I thought oh I know what that is like and I thought it was fine marking but she was definitely marking that side of the bed they nice earrings no they were cheap oh that's her you marking her so many more you see that they're marking each other kind that turns green oh double mark double mark double marked it damn um so you're married right no hello

single no oh you've got somebody yes now may ask you some questions about your family or no sure well I want to get to know you okay all right sure get defensive no I'm not defense okay so the two daughters that you have yes I remember right were they from the same woman no two separate women yes the woman that you're with now is it any of those daughters yes oh the second one yes right yeah right so um were you married when you had your first daughter I was oh you were yeah so this is are you married now no no you said no she's just dating now yeah yeah yeah but you raise the two raise the two daughters

are they living in your house well I've you know I had a shared custody with the first one but that's generally how it works when two people are split up yeah that's not what Barack Obama experience wait are they did they get a divorce no but he never was in his life oh you're talking about dad I thought Obama and Michelle was like oh no oh that would oh that would suck that would be bad that would break my heart I don't think they can legally they can't there's no way they can anymore not like there is a good service would like shoot one of them first right but you know it's like Bill Clinton and Hillary you know the

there's no love there no they're not they don't fuck no do you think that if you put them across from each other and just got them so fucked up and put a bunch of old photos in front of them that they wouldn't at least like do a reminisce fondle no I'm maybe bill might make a move but I don't think Hillary likes him at all yeah you're right I mean her I mean she's I like her and I haven't you know I mean Benghazi whatever you know email whatever right but I'm just saying that I don't think I think her bad let's just say this I think a mommy would have a moister fad really you don't know that I think like I think Hillary is

like sopping wet really oh you want to go the other way you want sopping wow hiding off her chair why I didn't hear that maybe she was a lesbian oh this up are we making up no I think I did hear that really not from like a good source right yeah but like I feel like he's a sex addict yes right so when you have somebody that's asexual a sex addict what is the sex he must be in a lot of pain she's not asexual I said sopping wet oh for women right yeah just for something else I don't know a freaking inanimate object I don't care I just she reads sopping wet to me wow wow that's I've never yeah I've never

never even never ever violently jerks off every night I just know it violently yeah yeah she is in the Ruge baby did she use fingers or do you see your machine contraptions yeah all your brook stone contraptions oh wow what do you got like massage wands and shit yeah yeah I used to get down with that really when I was a kid oh I was gonna bond with you just now yeah no I can't bond with anybody with this what you what you put like the massager on your dick no I get those gigantic ones and I put it on against my penis yeah dude I used to do that when I was a little kid it's all good right so good how do you do it now I

don't know what do you mean you don't know I just don't know what I don't want it's your chance to bond dude I don't know I've got like I got like kids bro that's right but you can't go I'm massaging my back anyway I'm massaging my back yeah I got I have one of those Thera guns but those like punch too much but you can try they have the face one now they do yeah the Thera gun has the face massager now maybe you can try the face and cock well I last night I was in the green room at the in the main at the comedy store and a woman that works for a sex toy company was sitting next to me and I started

going well can I develop one oh I want to develop my own what I want isn't out in the market you know can I say this that's your billion-dollar idea because I truly think that men sex toys are so like just beneath the quality of women sex thank you like the engineering and women sex toys like basically like you and I can live in separate states and I can have a vibrator and you control it that's how women's toys are yeah like men there's nothing there with a flesh light yeah well I have one I have one upstairs a flesh like not I could bring it down I could bring it all flesh lights oh a real doll yeah can I bring it

down real quick yeah I'll be right back we should ask it does it have jizz on it there's no jizz on it let's not bring out you sure so I did not bring it down should not bring it down I want I want to see what it looks like do you mind I don't mind okay good I mean I've seen plenty I'm excited proud of this comes down sopping is it like one of those signature series ones I have never seen this one so this is a reveal for me as well okay you see how like excitedly he really wants to show you all this stuff I don't know why he doesn't do this with everybody no so this is the first time the the audience will be seen his flesh

light yeah I think it looks like a speaker yeah like a JBL looks like a beats pill why is it so wet why is it so wet it's oil it's oil not my mom was caring that around all day last like last week really came over to clean your place oh she's a what is the speaker you know where do I put this dirty she thought it was your thermos yeah so I get thirsty so um so basically open it like this oh Jesus so you know I mean this is the opening look ridges yeah that's the roo-gay roo-gay the roo-gay ridges right so let's see if I can turn it on oh just don't let it shoot anything out no there's it doesn't squirt there's no

there's no energy in it but basically what it has is it has an air release right so there's a suction so when you press yes when you press this when you press this button right here it does a suction oh it goes oh there it's on right so this is why so this is a suction yeah and it sucks look at sucking like the clit suckers stick your finger oh I thought it was gonna cut that was too hard we a georgia we stick your finger in it no don't wash your hands when you're done you're gonna get no don't wipe your eyes you're gonna get ocular herpes yeah yeah all right I forget all right yeah yeah thank you gonna do it

yeah yeah thank you George George you know he fucked that what if it gets stuck you gotta go to the hospital all right let's take a middle finger let's take your middle finger and that has not been washed George put some popcorn in the eat out of it yeah yeah just line yeah yeah yeah go wash your hands go what you're vibrating as well it vibrates right and it sucks there's an air release you have you know different types of vibration Tesla that's yeah it's a Tesla yeah so basically but this is not good enough what do you mean is that the best one you've ever had how much is the best one I've ever had probably

three hundred dollars don't even say the brand until they pay you actually yeah but my point is is that I need the vibration here's the deal right I need the do you think about buying one right no that wow was more of like why the cleaning process right I don't like any sort of like reusable thing you come in really yeah interesting life do you pull out when you come or you're not right into it is a baby newborn you can have it make a third yeah he's going to the lab is it a thing where you like do it wash it in the dishwasher or no well you can take the little silicone thing out right and I really wash it deeply I

didn't watch this one this one's still got coming up dude now they have these things called tanga eggs they are literally like these eggs yeah now they probably vibrate I've only had like the manual ones yeah it's kind of like this egg that's that material sort of and you just kind of for men yeah for men did you ever use one I did yeah yeah we did like a big free box of them at work a haul it really yeah yeah and it was kind of weird because we like give them to employees and I'm sure that's frowned upon now all right you think so yeah yeah they were cool it was nice there we go yeah they were cool yeah so you just

freehand it yeah freehand I respect the shit out of that thank you that is so risk I truly respect that respect what it's freehand game yeah I really am starting to respect people who can like jerk off to memory and just freehand yeah can you do that um in my yeah I bet I could yeah I'm not saying you could like it would take you hours though no no oh so you so here's could I have you in a room now we're gonna do this Gary have you in a room you in a room nice bad temperpina sure right silk sheets yeah right and I go like you gotta you know I mean come into this thing with no lube no porn no 30 I don't in 30 minutes I

wouldn't spit I don't use lubrication oh dry yeah dry you dry cock it yeah never like use like lotion no wow white people are so dry in itself yeah we're you guys seem like a dry people we are we are yeah yeah right did they just seem like whenever I touch their skin it's like oh there's no nothing yes bad we don't have like oils that's a creep from us hey well ethnic people are more soft and they're more moist and a little moist I agree yeah yeah but my point is is that could you in 30 minutes come have come in a cup I don't like if you're giving me like a shot clock I don't know that's like adding something all

pressure yeah all right no take as long as you want yeah I could probably get something yeah but I'll squeeze something out okay good good good good good good I don't think I could do it without visual aid right not right now no yeah not right now cuz you're so important peeking on with all the four 4k porn right oh yeah I do really you watch a lot why I'm just saying it's like you why there's no coming back from 4k I think what is for what is 4k have anything to do with it I mean the high definition that's true you like that stuff well I like you know I you know when I I know a guy that has good fellas on VHS yeah

any blu-ray yeah absolutely right yeah they have there's a few companies that are doing that like elevated porno it's cool oh I know yeah I know cuz I I took a porn star out Friday night just as a friend okay and I'll just say her name Lou Me Ray is that the girl whose friend you found attractive no okay no Lou Me Ray is a funny girl yeah but she's a porn person and we talked about that stuff yeah yeah yeah like the biz like you talk biz yeah we talk biz yeah I love porn girls yeah I had a million questions yeah she does full-blown now she's segwaying into full-blown film with dialogue and and a character wow you

know something's gonzo you know I mean they just have scenes yeah no not she's going although she's going Hollywood yeah yeah star she's a starlet she's a starlet yeah yeah awesome she's a part of that whole like AVN like perfect yeah she goes to all the things I don't know if she's not been nominated she will be yeah she got the talent yeah performer of the year let's let's manifest it I want to manifest it for her but also it's one of those things where it's like there was just no vibe oh yeah yeah you sometimes girls hang out with me because they think I'm like mr. Miyagi oh okay yeah and they asked me why his questions

like you know what is it like living in the moment I guess there's no pussy coming my way tonight but you know you're out here imparting wisdom on people yeah so now I have to be I have to play that role so when you come to this situation you gotta be able to you know I mean read this book and it's sad I know it's sad yeah but that's just the nature of looking like this that's not true I look wise yeah that's the problem no we got it on pretty yeah but some girls go they can't believe that they're fucking a fat Asian guy that they get even wetter that's a secret they're like I can't believe in my wildest dream I

would fuck somebody looks like this but it turns them out even more wow that's my is that what do you mean what is it I don't know it's mythological yeah it's otherworldly I mean it's out of the box you know I prefer Owen Gray okay yeah yeah yeah I prefer on gray but if that's the guy that's a guy is Owen Gray a porn star he's one of the best what makes him the best I've been watching him I I like it he's so good that's the way he's the way he does it he's skinny you know me he's got tattoos uh-huh and he locks in the eyes oh yeah something I look away wait he looks in the camera no he looks in there oh that'd be

interesting yeah yeah something he does that yeah but he locks inside her eyes yeah right and you know when I look in the eyes you know I mean do you look in the eyes there's moments but I wouldn't say it was like full lock the whole time that's weird that's no let's try a 30 second one see what happens that's him that's Owen that's Owen Gray oh I think I've seen him no he's better than anyone else yeah I believe it he because this girl that I went out with Friday Loomi she booked an appointment with him but he's like four months in he's like one of those like high-class Michelin star restaurants were no we're like you

know a mama's fish house and you know Maui yeah they're like three months at reservation that's what Owen Gray is holy shit yeah people want and when women fuck him and I've never experienced this before right huh when he enters yeah you know mean something happens to the face it's like the matrix like yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah she they took the was it the red one yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah and they they get you know they you know go to different that doesn't look like a pleasure face scary alright let me I can really do it let me see if I can why are you like why cuz I gotta envision it right are you the woman I'm the

woman who fucks like this as a guy what oh I oh that's what I do you do you do my bad Amazon Amazon I do Amazon style it's like frog stance yeah yeah it's a frog style some people go fries the frog style that's cool yeah I mean is that like a pile driver scenario down there's the pile driver is like you know it's interesting my dick's not long enough no yeah because when I go down my sacks is still lower your sack hangs right so that sack you know I mean hits the badge before my dick right so that doesn't work yeah but my point yeah anyway I don't want to talk about dick's anymore it's uncomfortable yeah I'm not a

position guy you know no you're like such a sweet Mish guy Mish and cow girl yeah girl and that's it that's it yeah I mean yeah yeah I mean what what decisions are kind of overrated right yeah that's what I had my dad of it was said that your dad my dad used to go position oh so over like what do you mean that you know like I can't do power drive my sock you're too long you know me it's like a rice you said interesting but my point is yeah yeah yeah positions are too overrated yeah I feel like this episode is really dick heavy can we just like maybe that's the second way we gave vagina the spotlight

for a little bit open with the vagina yeah yeah yeah no no no let's close with like Christian stuff all right let's go Christian Christian you believe in God yeah like Jesus no no I believe in like a like a god in like a sense of like connectedness and all that like as soon as you're like do you believe in him and it's like what all right right fucking God's a dude oh right exactly so and I think in a lot of people's minds it is it's like a dude up in heaven right it doesn't make any sense people's idea of God I was in a uber in Hawaii and the guy had Christian rock music on sweet and one of the lead no it was like a

Christian real Christian probably Mormon if it was in Hawaii maybe but the line I listened to one line and it said Jesus hold me in your arms forever right and I thought to myself Jesus has arms yeah like why would you have arms like when you die and go to heaven you guys welcome yeah you're like oh shit he's got arms like why would he need it he's God yeah you know he's got arms and he's got a dick we're back but I was like if Jesus took your hand well you never you would never look down you know why why the holes oh you don't want to put a spotlight to it my uncle would get crucified on the cross like every

Easter Sunday go crazy in the Philippines like they nail them what's that called again I forget what they call it my uncle was my uncle was the guy and he became a murderer and you wonder why okay became a murderer yeah he ended up like committing a crime but he was nailed on the cross every year for like most of my childhood I remember just seeing my uncle nailed like every how long would you say how long would you not that long but they would like put the thorns and like put her uncle dude yeah they'd like that's crazy dude that's crazy yeah they go full on that's dedication yeah the nail is there a

hole yeah yeah they nail them no sacrificial they really put the nail in his hand and there's always a volunteer I don't think God even thinks that's necessary I don't think that's like chill out dude yeah it's overboard also you God's probably got you're stealing my thing yeah hey all right I did that first yeah yeah it's kind of my thing do they do the knife to the thing no they don't crucify the feet they just dangle the hands man this is really yeah oh because the feet is like you have to do that cross it like this and they do one bolt to both feet but have you ever seen the difference between oh yep there it

is that's so gnarly dude that is so gnarly dude are crazy insane yeah yeah what the I want to apologize to I lied what did you lie about I did go to church yesterday morning what oh my god I knew it you went to church in LA he woke up really early on a Sunday and I and he woke me up he was like hey I'm off to so-and-so and I was like where are you and jokingly I was like why are you up this early are you going to church and he was like what no no it was just a guess you did go to church yeah with a girl yeah I did I knew it there's only one reason why you'd go to church for pussy that's only reason that's a

lot of reason people go to church for yeah not the Bible pussy yeah I know and did you get no oh well no long con not even long con I was sitting there going what am I doing here yeah did you learn did you feel the the spirit I did learn it move you it's been so no one that's where the girls are yeah church hell yeah I never knew I looked around I was like holy this is better than the club you know man yeah and number two their music has improved oh yeah yeah the band was ripping not ripping like Interpol no not Interpol not dark okay it wasn't like you know I mean golfing like that yeah but it was more like you know church

revival like the luminaires acoustic guitars and people you know I mean so I was like oh they've changed their thing yeah they rebranded they rebranded dude right cool this church was we have you seen those like Christian like rock bad groups it's like arena they pack out arenas oh really huge moneymaker yeah yeah so that I also noticed that I was like a lot of people music's good and the sermon it's it wasn't one of those churches where it was like gays are an abomination kind of a church yeah they're more like open and stuff that's cool yeah I mean so what like a progressive yeah I mean I mean that's

one of the reasons I never went to church because of those rules yeah the ones that didn't make any sense right if you just changed a couple of things we would all go yeah like number one barbecued what if you had a barbecued yeah right right yeah yeah for certain races yeah yeah yeah that's not all the races all the race at barbecues I know but more anyway there's some reason they'll be more excited but anyway my my cousin who was like the island meth dealer yeah he would go to church every Sunday he was the most like pious motherfucker every like I've ever met in my life wow and every Sunday he would get

Kala what the you know the bread yeah he would cry with Neil on the pews but he was our island meth dealer wow did you ever go to church no I did when I was young right but as an adult you've never yeah I went to like church camp oh Jesus camp yeah no it was fun it was cool yeah it wasn't like it wasn't like no Sunday school like you have to be in class all night like the documentary Jesus camp yeah that thing yeah terrifying great documentary though really good yeah it wasn't any it wasn't weird like cult or anything it was just basically summer camp and then at night we did like the singing Jesus stuff all right the guy

would read from the Bible or whatever right were you high no okay no that'd be one of those kids that would go in the woods and you probably get high yeah there were like people we heard about people like fuck and each other oh yeah yeah it was cool what are some of the things they should get rid of gaze abomination yeah you get rid of get rid of that conversion therapy yeah but that's part of the same thing right speaking in tongues but you're over it no over it's not real no no no no you have to keep that because like that is just endless joy for me to watch for entertainment we'll keep it okay let's

keep it tongue stay okay we're starting because you look like Jesus thank you you're welcome so let's say we're you and I're gonna start our own ministry so what we're gonna have and not have on it barbecue for all the race yeah yeah we already heard every race every race gets a barbecue we'll do different styles of barbecue then that's a lot of barbecuing bring it on yeah cuz we have to do the sweet barbecue for the Koreans love that right so we have to have gal be there love that oh yeah of it and then all right so we keep barbecue but do that before after um maybe you could kind of I think you're gonna want to do after

otherwise people will leave after they eat no what about if it's just church is a giant cookout that's cool yeah I feel like that would that would be a hit that's a hit yeah so we barbecue all right and then what else do we do um also a rule you you you can have sex before you're married yeah yeah yeah yeah let's get behind that yeah the board yeah it's we that's kind of it's odd if you're first time you're having sex is your wedding night that's yeah I watched yental and that was very traumatizing yeah yeah but what's weird about it I like how do you even know a person how do you even know who you are if you haven't

even had sex at you're just like a yeah but we let's see your three years dating a girl yes and you're having sex you already know who she is and you like her right but what is so give me the one thing what the pussy you don't fuck good oh or if we never yeah but you never see it no you can't learn it you can learn to fuck good no you can learn you can learn to play soccer too but you're not pale that's true who wants to be a paleo pussy I want paleo pussy you do not his pussy all right PR IP yeah yeah we're going back to Vagina we are all right let's stay away from let's all right so the church all right church have

sex before abortion abortion should we should have them for them yeah I because I've you know I've we've had a couple or she's abortion's gotta be a change the name to that no I don't think that's a good abortion abortion okay yeah but we like a name the church that I'm just saying you know the gays are fine abortion's they're fine yeah just one of the rules were you know allowing what else we what do we exclude oh we got a church you got to screw something yeah we got to exclude something I'm trying to even think of what the other rules are I know well that yeah that that um yeah what are the else that's it I think I

think that's it yeah yeah like you got to throw in some like obnoxious thing you can't eat like nightshades you know like no egg plant no tomato no yeah that's come up some arbitrary very inflammatory anyways yeah do like an old testament food thing like the juice let's just know we can make our own thing no eggplants yeah I don't know you guys like eggplants no I love tortang talong is really good okay we just can't even say that it's a torta it's like this smashed eggplant and you cook it with ground pork and egg yeah but now it's not really eggplants so it's all that other delicious yes like

it's an omelette basically that sounds good okay how about this no I don't the halloween candy what about it what about it just we the yellow red one the one that you can't have it no candy corn that's what it calls candy corn you don't like candy corn you like that you like candy corn you eat candy what the fuck maybe it's a white guy thing look at dors the door loves it like candy corn candy corn is delicious oh yeah what's the flavor honey sugar yeah yeah it's delicious I love sugar though no sugar I get just dip your fucking finger in a fucking bowl of sugar then no there's fun to like eat the little white tip and

then eat the orange like can you change the flavors of the colors at least they they do lazy white candy making classic I'm tired of lazy white candy making you go to a fucking Japanese oh my god right okay they have fucking juice in it yeah but you can eat the paper sometimes yeah that's right why yeah why are you so lazy at making candy look at that you open a Japanese website yeah this is a Japanese website look at it wow colors the colors yeah but some of the what Japanese candies nasty like what I don't know I'm not I'm not a huge green tea guy I love green tea do you like haichu that I love haichu that's probably one

like a starburst there we go that one's good I've had the wheat whole wheat biscuit it's actually kind of good exactly yeah yeah cuz I got like a box of every Kit Kat flavor cuz I didn't know they had like thousand not a thousand but like a hundred flavors right like the green tea one I'm just not a green tea guy really oh you like matcha then no really all right so when you guys make Kit Kats my people your people right you're like let's stick it with one kind of flavor chocolate chocolate the Japanese took it with 10 top labor what did they say 10 top labor paper you're mean and they're like what prayers all

right leechy we could do right hand on hand on who obey obey right and they did it all I like who bae why are you guys so lazy in that way it's like you do something good you do it right and then you right right right that's the American standard right yeah yeah I like it make one thing great but just we're not gonna go outside the box yeah it's like in and out right what about Snickers they're good like it it's okay I'm not like a chocolate guy per se but Snickers is delicious I like American these are classic Americans number one me too I think so too I'm enjoy is number one crunches is delicious but I

like I liked a bunch of crunches what's a bunch of crunches they were the little balls yeah yeah they were really good for movies bunch of crunches oh yeah yeah um what about let's see what else we got a m&m's plain m&m's our garbage are obsolete wow they should get rid of it the I agree yeah I agree it's so bland it's terrible the peanut ones good peanuts are delicious I don't understand a white food is the peppermint patties yeah I don't like those too minty you where's the peppermint patty York hate it do you guys like mint chocolate chip ice cream I love it you yeah it's pretty good she

hates it and I think like on days you know those is that how you say you know little green square ones yeah it mint chocolate but York's are like they fucking suck the dick of all dicks yeah it's like mouthwash candy yeah I hate dude fucking great thing man yeah we just critic in our church we also have a candy company there we go right wait you know what three musketeers was actually okay you like that that's the all new get yeah what is new get yeah what's new get new get killed looking at also white people can you explain to me this yes black liquorice that's bad why I don't know that's just like I don't

maybe it was like one of the original candies yeah but that like the flavor you mean it's wait is it garbage liquorice star anise yes but see in Asian food we use a lot of star anise in your food not in your candy yeah that's true it's a favorite thing like it's like putting pork in your candy or candy it sounds delicious actually meat candy that's kind of like sweet like yeah like sweet beef jerky yeah sweet kind of yeah I go I go hard you could also do chocolate in it bacon chocolate that's like isn't it like mole isn't that chocolate like the mole baby yeah good and plenty garbage good terrible terrible that's black

licorice just like goober's goober's what you call me man yeah yeah what the hell's a girl okay yeah Swedish fish too hard you don't like those no you got to get a fresh pack and really a fresh pack yeah because I know because Swedish people invented it and you love you whites I we love you know that's what is shit of the gummies I think I like the all the knees ones better they're really soft they serve it on Alaska Airlines oh okay yeah I have to pee real quick yeah and then we'll finish I promise okay okay we'll be talking about candy still candy yeah of course anyway let's move on

from candy I think we should end on candy before we go back to dick let's close with pussy yeah closing on can do we have any unhelpful advice yeah we got some rapid fire for Blake so we have some rapid fire questions at the end okay yeah let me let before we do this let me ask you something sure would you do our podcast again yeah you don't want me to you did you did the sound kind of like the yeah yeah you were in the middle there yes I would you would yeah you have fun yeah I had a blast it was a lot of fun yeah do you think that you and I became closer I do I do I do too yeah now when we see each other we're

gonna hug I do man nice yeah and I have good feelings for you I feel I feel good about you as well great and honestly we I had a blast with you today and you're welcome anytime you want to promote anything just give us a call you're on okay okay all right go ahead this is a question from beer chugger what's the wildest craziest drug-induced experience last story ever had for everyone in the room for the drug experience yeah mmm I don't know yesterday I drank like a kava kava root oh it wasn't wild or anything but I'm just excited that I'm still trying new things in my older age and nice it was cool made my body feel

good yeah kava yeah Bobby craziest one give the question again what is the craziest drug-induced experience you've ever had I know koalas drug induced yeah I mean it's the best drug in on planet Earth nice I think you're in I'm in yeah I mean mine was for yeah mental health purposes it was ketamine but that was in a controlled setting but boy it was rough it went out of control it was a little rough for me I thought I was dying I was there I've never done ketamine well they give it such a high dose I think in a controlled setting it's not like recreational ketamine where people are like oh yeah I had this and you can

still drive it's like no no no like you're completely departed from your body interesting yeah like you can hear like when you when you talk you sound like just a garbled version of yourself like a distant version that's it yeah it was scary for me because I don't I'm kind of a square like maybe I drink twice a year and I don't do anything else so when I got shot up into space it was terrifying yeah but you did it but I did it I'm proud of you this is from the master Blake what are three keys to achieving happiness what is the Blake Anderson rules I just you know I think a lot of my happiness roots from just the

people in my life friends family and then a bunch of money helps to money helps hate worrying about money do you still worry I do yeah yeah me too sometimes you have to have a healthy worry yeah keeps you keeps you hustling you've investments and whatnot yeah okay me too yeah yeah you yeah we all do right I do I do yeah everybody's investing we're investing okay a lot but you know a little little here a little there like NFTs or something no mutuals oh not NFTs I got Trump all of Trump's NFTs oh good good I got every card I got every card what good I got every card yeah they were you like him no no you

don't no okay no I don't like him we can still get along though yeah you know I'm a big trunk I that's yeah yeah I don't get upset when people claim it but yeah yeah I think he's kind of a yeah me too a dork yeah he's a dork yeah I don't like him you know that yeah it's fine without Republicans that's fine I don't know I don't do politics Blake when you get the new workaholics movie up and going again how would you write in Bobby Lee into the movie oh we had a scene where we went to like the bunny ranch like the whorehouse I think you would have been really really good as the guy who ran ran the ranch bro if you ran up

it would it would have been really fun dude dude yeah it would have been good it's gonna happen we'll see no but here's the thing you don't understand about me bud okay I'm a manifester dream weaver I'm a dream weaver right I like it now I just put it on the world I'm doing it okay I'm doing it with you guys okay I'm gonna eat the bunny ranch guy right I want to be really weird as the part you're gonna do really good yeah it's gonna be and um yeah it's happening okay cool in 30 years okay yeah yeah yeah I'll still be alive it's my last role we always said workaholics would be way funnier if we were really old guys yeah that'd be great yeah I

think that's God has his own time yeah you know and we should talk about that on our church I would love to yeah God has his own time we'll put that as a banner would you guys all go to our church if like a night right okay cool right any else anything else you want to plug well we got I'm totally fine let's do that for Brendan Dermot's movie and your movie yeah where can we watch it yes I believe it comes out like February 2nd where on Hulu fuck great great fucking streaming platform yeah yeah why are you laughing I like when you said fuck great fuck great fuck great fuck great and what else this is important our

podcast me and the guys that we do hmm we have a lot of fun with that tell the guys I said hello I will good all of them all three Anders as well Anders too yeah you got it's Anders Anders yeah yeah who else is there Kyle Kyle right yeah Kyle Adam Anders and myself that's great yeah and with Adam's schedule he makes everyone or no well we zoom them all they're all zoom that's why it's kind of cool to be live in person oh you don't do live no oh yeah with I only was Anders in that Anna Delvy show was he played the husband yes yeah he was great in that I'll tell them to look at you guys you guys look great yeah thanks you

know a lot of mine I was intimidated by you guys be honest with you when you guys were killing it really yeah I was intimidated by you when I went to that dinner I was I was all right anyway give him a round of applause like thanks hey Prime members you can listen to Tiger barely ad-free on Amazon music download the Amazon music app today or you can listen ad-free with Wondry plus in Apple podcast before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at wondry.com slash survey