TigerBelly - Episode 140: Independence Day

Episode Date: May 2, 2018

Bobo is the Ice King. Khaloko laughs at a funeral. Gilbo is quizzed on his love. George wears a special tee. We talk mental prisons, a balancing act, and a birthday bonanza.Support us by supporting our sponsors!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey Prime members, you can listen to Tiger Belly add free on Amazon music download the app today You You You Go ahead five four three two one What theme song is that from what movie No, no, I'm being real. I didn't say I didn't see the repeat after me. Oh, that's what we're all singing. No, no, no What movie is that from?

No, no, no Is it space related? Yes. I know I can see it. Yeah mom mom watch this. Yeah Not starving. I'll get yes. Would you say independence day? I love that movie. Welcome to Tiger Belly I love that movie so much so close. Can I have some trivia for Independence Day? Okay, tell me tell me okay. I'm gonna ask you some questions. Okay In independence day In the independence day in the movie Independence Day, right? Yeah. What what what main character died? Oh My god the wife of the president. Yeah

Spoiler all right, let me ask you this Who plays the main scientist in air for an air for what's it called Jeff Goldblum. No, let me finish area 51 The main scientist the guy who escorts the president in yeah, yeah, but he's the main scientist down there Can you give me a clue? He's in another sci-fi show. Oh Shit, I know I see his face. You guys are fucking losers. Who is it? Brent Spiner? I wouldn't guess that data from Star Trek This data's from Star Trek die In the movie. Yes, how I don't know. Yeah, he does he dies and the reason how he dies is that what they have

They you know, um the black guy. What's his name? Will Smith? Yes Yeah, yeah, the black guy right the military black guy. Yeah Okay, so he was an air first guy. Yeah, and he was in space not in space. He was an air He was in the air. He was fighting. He was fighting. No, he was fighting the aliens one of the aliens, right? Yeah, and then that's what's a singer songwriter with a singer his friend He's a lounge singer or something Harry Connick Harry Connick. What's his name Harry Connick? Yeah, he's in it Yeah, he played his buddy. That's right. Harry Connick dies. They're in the space battle No, they're air air battle and then and then the black guy gets really angry

Yeah, yeah, the black. Yeah, I refuse At this point, right and he's going in the air with the space and then he shoots one down I think and then he he grabs one of the aliens. He punches him in the face, right? He said have a nice day or something Yeah, and punches him in the face and he drags this alien through the desert. Yeah, remember that in a parachute Yep, and he gets picked up by Randy Quaid's brother. Yep. Was that right or Dennis Quaid one of the quades The one who believes he got abducted whatever that guy. Yeah, and then they make it to the military base And then that one alien um, he's still alive because they did surgery on him

And then he came back alive and then he took Brent Spiner and he killed That's how he died. Can I give you guys another trivia? Well Bobby actually auditioned for Aquaman. Yeah, and the reason why his audition went really well is because they used the same lines as No, it didn't go well independence day. It didn't go well. We wait you memorize every But I did here's why it didn't go well, right because I first of all, I love independence day is one of my favorite movies I love everyone in it. Okay, the black guy. Yeah, I love Jeff. What's the president's name in it? Bill Pullman Bill Pullman Jeff. Jeff Bill Pullman

Vivica Fox. Vivica Fox. A Fox isn't it right that black guy the loud singer. He's in it, right the quaid Yeah, data. I love it data's in it But um, the thing is is that I've seen the movie so many times that it they the the audition for Aquaman was all the lines from the movie Independence Day that the scientists but since I've seen the movie so many times that I did it the same exact way And it didn't turn out well I thought I thought you had it in if I would if I had it in the bag I would have got the fucking movie baby, but I think that if you had an Independence Day to audition Yeah, yeah, kill it. No, but one of my dreams is to be in a like a I love disaster movies

Everyone knows that right. I've seen all of them. I've seen volcano. Yeah, if we can see volcano, of course With Tommy Lee Jones. Yeah, that's a classic. All right, who plays the woman in it the main and H lezzie Yeah, he rubbed used to rub the badge with my producer with George. No, my producer on spilling up together Ellen DeGeneres Rub the badge is they not and they started a fire in the West Hollywood years ago Yeah, because they rub so hard, right? It lit up the fucking town. Do you guys know that dough? I hope my boss doesn't hear what I just said there, but I don't want you to cut it out Okay, all right because that's the truth Mm-hmm, but um, yeah, so I saw that today and I was at the Ontario improv and

A magic happened guys pure magic happened. Well, first of all Last week they called me said no tickets were sold. Oh You this is gonna be the worst weekend of your life. All right. That's what they freak me out They freak you out the manager my everyone freaks me out about first of all, I'm a sick, too Just to let you guys know I'm a sick too and Kala is very sick I'm sicker. I'm a sickest, but anyway, um, so you know, I did one tweet I go help me Tiger Belly people and It every show was filled and they did a magic and Adam Adam Groutman So my so the backstory is remember I used to live in Silver Lake

And I made fun of the guy that lived down the hallway for me. Yeah, Adam Groutman the comedian And I said he would come to my apartment and she would hear I would hear his sets from his tape recorder And they were not good. So anyway, he He texted me about a month ago saying like very tearful and saying you hurt my feelings I've gotten better this and that so I go, you know, what? Why don't you open for me in a? Ontario so he showed up every show five shows and let me say something He was entertaining He was so nice. He's so nice. Didn't you feel bad that you had said that about him?

I did and here's the one thing that I didn't know about him. He's much better than George But he's been doing it more than for 20 years. So he should be better I know you're coming back and then people showed up and it was a really mighty fine weekend I thought you know and there's a lot going on in this country and I'm so sick I can't even deal with any of it really to be honest with you You know, I you know, we know talk about politics here and I'm not going to talk about it now because clearly gets mad when I talk about it because you know, it's It's a lose-lose situation. It's it's it's

You know what George told me just now before the podcast is that live in a mental prism mental prison. Yeah You said that live in a mental prison. I'm just saying let Kanye's tweets inspire you to break out of your mental prisons Don't look at what he like what he's tweeting Look at like the floats you can gain from what he's tweeting. If you live in a mental prison break out of it. I Don't live in a mental prison. You fucking No one lives in a mental fucking prison, dude, you know, I took some time. I was like what mental prisons do I live in? Well, let me ask you. Let me ask you. How would I even know if I live in a mental prison? You just got to think about it. What are one of yours? So yeah, what are you? Yeah, why how are you living in a mental prison? I?

I don't think big enough, you know, I'm thinking too small. I'm only thinking about like Next week think about five years from now. What's possible? Achieve that's not a fucking prison No, cuz I think that you should stay present Maybe you're not thinking big enough, but I think that thinking too far ahead can be a huge I'm thinking about too small about what's possible Oh, okay, I understand. Here's my mental prison. I okay Yes, I have certain beliefs and I know that other people have the opposite beliefs that I do, right? You know, I believe in you know, I'm a bleeding heart liberal and it's sad to say that I am

You know, I believe that You know, we should be able to take some of our money and help others with it. I don't think I'll ever shake that I believe that I just have this inner paranoia That corporations and the people that are running this country are selfish and they're greedy and that they they don't share their wealth and I want to put a kink in that, you know, I like when I see a movie I like when the little man comes up, you know, like when the black guy from Independence Day He's a little man, right? But him and the guy from Jurassic Park Yeah, so, you know, the black guy from Prince Prince, the fresh Prince

Prince and the fly right they got into a rogue like, you know, abandoned And that one jellyfish movie the blue octopus ring movie Yeah, that and they went up and they they they harbored on to it in the harbor but they latched on to the main mothership, right and they put a virus in the Spacecraft, right and they gave it a sickness, right and they really escape and save the day, right? When I see movies like that, I want the little man to come up They would have never thought of that if they were in a mental prison of like what's possible. I have a mental prison What's your mental is it in your nose right now? Yeah, it's really weird that you have an issue coming under a ghost

I have two options. I can either you can either watch my nose drip like a waterfall or I can plug it It's natural though. I gotta fucking plug it. I'm sorry. There is nothing there. There is no recourse. No other recourse My mental prison is I'm an idea machine But I cannot I have no follow-through and the reason I don't have follow-through is because I don't have I'm so afraid To fail On not even just fail in general, but like for instance, yes I think that in that sense because I do have a perfectionist gene you fucking talk, right? It's okay

That I cannot I'd rather not know if I if I'd rather not know the end of it because yeah I already know it's not gonna be perfect. So I don't even fucking try and I don't fucking Yeah, it drives me crazy and I sit here and I just have a mountain of ideas And I'm sure you guys have known me long enough to get a lot of ideas You're like wow Kaleila, that's a lot, but then I never fucking put pens of paper and I want to apologize to No, you sound great Because you just ignited something and within my soul my friend. Oh good my girlfriend. You just You ignited something within my soul my friend and what that is is that you're right?

I did live in a mental prison But a couple of weeks ago. Maybe a week ago I saw something on the net and it opened my world up and I think I took a step out of my present prison Oh, was it? I was watching British Got Talent Just listen to what I'm saying. Okay. I love I love watching talent shows. Oh, yeah, boy shows Everyone knows that about me and I was watching these two Vietnamese brothers. Oh, yeah And you white people out there. Well, you can call them whatever you want. Okay. I know what No, I know what they're trying to think in their heads

But what I'm saying to you right now Bobby knows I know all right and these two good brothers are winners and And they're creative and they're strong and they're evolved and they're better than all of us Tell us what they did on stage and tell one brother. Okay, so I'm gonna tell you so I was explained to George earlier this week that I saw this and What the act was this eventually what happens is one Vietnamese meanie's brother Right. Go goes on the head of another Vietnamese brother, right? And he balances his What

What are you doing? Yeah, what's gonna sit down sit down. What are you talking about? Kala just fell off her chair What Vietnam and Okay, I'm so sorry. I don't know why tomato tomato tomato tomorrow. All right, so one Vietnamese brother That's another Vietnamese brother on his head So basically just imagine this I don't even know how to explain it, but I imagine one Man standing there, right and another man his the top of his head

He's balancing the other man and the other man's backwards, right? And then he's walking around With his brother in that fashion they go down these stairs and then they go backwards up these stairs I'm telling you right now and I told that to George and George says me and Bryce can do it. Yeah Well, you offered that I said to I said George. I said I said to George. I said I'll give you 40% all income of all income I make For the rest of my life if you and Bryce do that in six months though in six months And you said yes, we can yeah, no head apparatus nothing

We get exactly the same thing they have if they have a head apparatus that's hidden by their hair We get it. No, but we don't have a head Yes, yeah, I'm just saying if they have one they don't have one, but if they did Okay, okay, you get the exact same thing they have yeah, but but you have to do exactly what they did Okay, so okay, they got advanced to like the semi-finals or whatever. Yeah, no they didn't oh they didn't but they got passed through right So like what is their next act aside from walking around with his brother on his top? Well, maybe does he dance you know the dance? Maybe yeah, maybe there's more like he puts his him on his head There's the third brother. It comes out. Yeah, and then a third brother comes out the upside-down running man. I

Don't know what it is. I think they did that thing that what they did was and that's a problem with those shows Yeah, is they show their best shit up front. Yeah, then they get through and then they panic for two weeks What else do we do? Right They probably get erectioned. They probably try different things get erections and balance You know But I don't know practicing George. No, there's no way they can do it I need to have it secured and right like what Bobby will give us. I know I got a 40% it

All in come he ever made I don't want to renegotiation as soon as we're getting close It's like, okay 30% you really believe and then we you you let me ask you fucking gangly as white fuck You really actually believe that you can do it with Bryce. You think you can balance Bryce on your head with the right amount of money They're with the right motivation. Yes Wow Oh, he also said it's because that him and Bryce are taller that they can balance better Bryce is tall It's better for better for balancing. I feel like if you're shorter, it's shorter is better The center of gravity you're just better when you're shorter because you have your stockier

It's like putting two the bottom person could be maybe not me tall, but I'm I'm upside down. Who's the body obviously I'm stronger He's too gangly, you know, he's got to be up there on the upside down Well, you know what I did the reason why I gave you that idea is because um, I haven't had a big laugh in a long time Like you know God roll like I can't breathe kind of a laugh And so I just wanted to set this up so that I could like just you know set myself up for happiness Because there's no fucking way you're gonna be able to do it There's no way there's no way but I want you to try please do that. Please and please record it Please record it like the practice sessions the rehearsals the rehearsals. Yeah

Okay, what are you thinking about? I'm thinking how to start where to get the where to get a rope to get Bryce upside down Just to practice like slowly with like within a few inches, you know, just like Hanging upside down I love it. Oh, then like, you know, but just like where I have like three inches where if I lift up three inches Then we can practice like there and then like slowly build up. Yeah. Okay. Great That's great People wanted also us to talk about that movie the quiet place Right. We did mention it last week or no

We were supposed to but we had a guest. We had a guest. Yeah, um, well on my rave review. I have a rave review of that movie I think I gave it a nay a solid day for that movie. I believe that that movie is crafty entertaining it's basically original It's aliens on a farm. No, but the whole like, you know, sound thing. Yeah. Oh I'm sorry. I'm gonna stop talking. I cannot stand how nasally my my voice is I'm just what did you say before this podcast my new someone in particular What did you say I can't stand hearing myself because I sound exactly like George. Damn it. But can I just

I want to throw something out there. It's like, why don't you just go to an island? Oh In the quiet place. Yeah, I Would find like a little island and then you know, I feel like I think they were just everywhere That's the idea that I got not really in that one place. Uh-huh. I think they were inescapable and our military couldn't get them Oh, I guess not it just wiped everyone out, huh? They wiped but there were still people that living there, right? Other camps Yeah, yeah, but anyone anyone anyone listening to me. It's you know, that movie is the opposite of annihilation I never I don't give a fuck what people say, you know my I have a friend I have a guy I go on YouTube. I go on YouTube and I listen to a guy named Chris truckman. He's a I love him

He's a movie reviewer reviewer. My brother and I love him. I and if I can get Chris truckman here in my podcast Anyone that knows him he lives in Ohio, but I would love to have him. So if you know him Reach out. Oh, this guy's great on YouTube. Yeah He's a great YouTube guy and he liked annihilation and you know what I can disagree with them Annihilation was pretty well acted, but it's basically the tree of life with aliens Hmm. It's just boring and at the end of it make any sense and you you can email me all you want and go Bobby You know, you don't know what you're talking about you. You know, you're dumb, right? But I prefer, you know just the fly

and Frisk fresh first doing their thing. I do You know go back to a quiet place. Would you could do you think you could survive in that environment? Oh My farts alone. That's how I was trying to think like how would you yeah? Yeah, you have to play one mask in your butt to fart into it or what? Well, what I would do is probably you know, what I know exactly what I would how would you survive? I already know what I would do

No, what I would do is this and this is very very good. So I would put yeah, you know, um Like a dildo in my butthole, but it's listen listen, but it's hollow So it's like a flute, but not not a flute where it's gonna whistle But you wanted the shape of a penis though. Yeah, no, it's just no just listen to what I'm saying A straw but much thicker and bigger And just so keep the hole constantly open Right because what makes the fart sound because this is what I do in bed I cut my fingers. I spread my butthole apart same here with my fingers and I it seeps

So when she slayed me it goes like that, right? So I would constantly have just something in my butthole And then hopefully like over time. It'll just be an open gap So you see just flies out your ass all day. Yeah, so it would just come out like Yeah, yeah, yeah It would be like that Like that. Yeah. Oh, I could see those monsters being like that guys. Why does he have something up his butthole? Or they could just follow my shit He went this way, you know the trail. Yeah, but um, so that would take care of my farts

I'm pretty loud snoring snoring snoring to Well, I would just put something on my nose like this now You know how they put the baby in that like that's what I would do. I would hyperbaric chamber. I would live like I would live like a vampire I would be in a casket. Oh, you would do all the forging for like. Oh, I'm a forager. Yeah, yeah I think it's pretty easy. I think you you'd live underground Right, you you'd sleep in a casket. How about laughing? That's a hard one for me. Well, it's hard to laugh when people are dying It really is there's no laughter

But anytime anyone tells me that I'm not allowed to laugh. I feel the urge to laugh. Yeah I think that if death is on around the corner. I think that that would like nix it Like I laughed at like I've laughed at every funeral I've ever been in. Yeah It's just my and it's not because I'm evil It's because um You know years ago my aunt died And stevee webe and I were at the funeral And this is when I was in

high school And we were sitting there and people were crying And You heard this knock knock like that. It's like somebody knocked something over or something, right? And I turned to steve. I got she's alive or I said something. Oh, my brother goes Ah, like and he starts laughing and we both started laughing and that was not good What did people around you do? I mean, they already knew that we were like kind of evil. Yeah Yeah, the same thing happened. Um, my dad didn't have a full service when he passed away

But he had some friends from his like an old like Born again christian church. Remember I was I was welcome to america by like a large um a group of Um, nigerian people who ran this like boarding and christian church. Yeah, and so, um This woman insisted that she come over to our house and he had his ashes on the table and she insisted that she was going to sing a song in honor of my dad and um I think it was her name was sister clareese or something like sister pam or something like that And she her rendition of amazing grace had my sister and I in tears that bad laughing I'm telling you laughing and we had a really small apartment. Yeah, but she's like brother edga

We miss you I and I was so like grief stricken But in that moment my sister and I like we were pinching each other so that we wouldn't laugh But I was holding my breath in because I was it was the funniest thing I had ever heard in my life She was so horrible. I mean look at kalilah Look how far she's come Let's hear what I'm saying Look how far look at look how far she's come

She's getting laughs on her own Listen, listen Yeah, she's taking her time. She's confident. She knows that she's gonna get a laugh, right? She she commits to the fucking punch lines, right? And look at her on the field one pilot On comedy central. What did I text you? What are the reviews? Yeah, what did you text? I texted kalilah. No joke not being completely serious. You fucking killed it on the show. She killed it natural I was being myself. I know but you know, you just look at what she's doing now. She's blowing up. She's she's now getting the confidence It's hard to be yourself in front of camera

And she said in the car there and I say you think I should go on No And I go I go I go Yeah, you did What do you mean like I think maybe I go No, that's like maybe you're mean so now why wait a couple years from now, right? She's gonna be on a series, you know, we're not working. Oh my god. We've created a monster Would you consider it though? No, you did it really very good. I thought it was good. What did you you were very funny?

What did I send you after you said? After you said, hey, um, you should work for 1fc. Oh, yeah, what did I send you back? What text did I send you? Oh, I can't because of my anxiety and I'd sweat. I know but what picture did I send you? Oh, you're nasty wet foot. Exactly. It's impossible for me to Impossible you look dry. You look very dry. I was very dry But if you have a chance it's on right the comedy central. Please watch it. It's very good man up man up So funny. We did the opening was our the opening episode I don't think so

There was a couple before us. There's only three episodes out. So yeah, anyway, um, I've been getting a lot of rave reviews on it Dude, you and the kid you and that lady was so you're really good with children Yeah, kids. Well, I'm like, you know, like a young boy. No, they get it I mean if you I mean if you look at the story of the spilling up together photo with, um sand or Jumping on me and me hugging was like a photo that they took photos splitting up together on instagram And there's a photo where the youngest kid jumps on me and we laugh, right? Kids generally, you know, I think like me

Right, I do because my intentions are pure You know, I think that they see the kid in me Mm-hmm, right and they know that there's no like crimson Hanson motive Chris, Chris Hanson from catch predator. There's none of that going on. No, I have a question. What just random Um, I got a text. How do you say in english? like, you know when when a movie is When a movie doesn't have a proper ending it kind of leaves you hanging. How do you say that? Like did have you seen infinity war yet? Yeah, okay in my language my niece is asking me at the collide

What's bitten in english like who won't let me think I don't movie meaning like how do you say that in english? Because she's trying to explain it to an american boy. She's going on a date with she's What she's going on a date. Well, so guy who's asking her on a date an american boy She doesn't know how to explain that the movie was like a cliffhanger cliffhanger But is that what it's called cliffhanger? But let me say something every single person that I've talked to about that movie Said it's the best out of all the movies. Is it true? Uh, you talking about infinity war? No, I'm talking about fucking apocalypse now. Oh, okay. You know if you're talking about the quiet place

Yeah, I'm talking about the fucking infinity. Were you fucking cock sucker? It's only the best one if you if you've uh put the time to watch all the other ones the payoff is greater if you watch I've seen all of them. Ask me ask me a question. Okay uh What is the actor's name black panther that plays no that that's not that's not a storyline thing Okay, what is that? I don't know anyone's name. I don't even know. I barely knew will smith's name. I called him black guy from fresh prince. What who is the villain in uh, the first avenger captain america first avenger The villain of the captain america. Yeah, the actor was hugo weeping, but what's the character's name?

Decepticon Exactly I don't know. I don't know. I think you'd like it Wait, wait, I don't even know it now you fucking cock sucker. Yeah, but if you've seen all of them Yeah, you'll just know it's a lot of a lot of payoff if you haven't seen any of them You'll be like I've seen them all I I think I can watch it and go Okay, I kind of get the gist of it, but I heard it was great. It was the russo brothers did it You worked with them. They did animal practice. Oh, yeah, that's right

So I was on a sitcom called the animal practice with justin kirk And anthony russo and his brother joe Yeah, you know, we're the producers of it. I auditioned for anthony He called nbc and just said just hire him I did animal practice Got canceled and now they're the they're like they did they did um Just listen captain america, um winter winter winter soldier. I call it winter winter. I call it double winter. Yeah

civics case civil war whatever All right, so I saw civics case and went to winter. Yeah great movies and the russo brothers did that And then I did this one infinities. Oh, you might get a cameo then in the future. No, they do it They give it to all people they've worked with They know not me they're going they're going backwards in their timeline. Well, they use danny. I know that. Yeah, right I did I did his pilot You know danny and sung kang. Yeah, oh sat fast and furious. What's this show? I saw I did I did I did a um their pilot a gaster and I had two lines

And then my arm breaks and then blood spews on danny's face And that was my scene. Oh, wow, but it was so funny Because I love sung kang, you know, if you ever see um the korean dramas I did on matt tv Sung kang is the star of that main star He's a good-looking korean dude, but he's in the fast and furious the tokyo tokyo han. Yeah, han, right? And he's one of the night he used to own a restaurant in brentwood. I used to go to all the time A japanese restaurant or something with his wife But he asked me to do it and um at first at first. I'm gonna whisper because I don't want to be here when I'm saying

Yeah, yeah But at first I didn't want to do it Because you know small thing But then he texted me and then I had to do it So I did it. I was forced to do it. I did it. He can't say no I can't say no to people. When was the last time you said no to a project? Never. Well, no, he can't say no if they personally call him Yeah, if I if they personally call me Like I have an audition. I'm not gonna see what it is

But tonight after we're done with this I have to put myself on tape with george And I at first I wasn't gonna do it But then the star of it And the writer of it Contacted me personally and goes can you do it? And I'm like, I'll do it And I don't want to do it. Not because it's because of the fact that I just I'm lazy You're gonna do it

Yeah, I'm gonna do it I'm gonna fucking do it. I'm gonna fucking do it. Yeah But um poor Kanye Why poor Kanye? I just don't like what he's doing, but do you want me to read through some of the hot topics and you have one word answers Why did you just make that up? Uh, no, we did not pre-plan this beforehand. So what are you doing? I'm gonna tell me what the game is. So I'm just gonna read a headline. Yeah, or just Uh, I'll give you a word and then you can respond your opinion only in one word. All right. I'll try it go ahead

North korea south korea rainbow Not good. Yeah Kanye uh trump tweets deception Michelle wolf white house correspondence dinner you turn Stormy daniels loose Uh

NBA playoffs California Yep, and that was hot takes You know what we're gonna do every week every week is it do a theme song do it? Hot takes that's it. That's it. So guys we're doing hot takes every week. Submit your hot takes. Yeah. Bobby will give his hot Take. Oh my god. They were good. That was good. California People think that I'm dumb people think that I don't read up Who is who's playing right now though? Who is just give me at least one team that's in the you know, okay

I'll I'll let me let me throw one out. Okay Um golden state nuggets The golden state the the california one. Yeah, I know but what is it? They're not nuggets. That's denver, babe Oh, yeah, I'm okay. Okay. Oh, yeah, they're the golden state. Give me the first word w The golden state wonder No, no, no, no, no the golden state. Um, what is it? No, just say it warriors. Oh

I like the golden state And then well, who else? Okay. What about the um, indiana india pacers? Clutch from that clutch clutch Give me another one. Just yeah, just say the same. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Give me the cities orlando Magic No, give me another one. Give me all the teams. Yeah, fuck them. I think you might know all of them I want to see if I want to see what's football like give me football and basketball. Okay Sacramento What for what do you want to just do playoffs?

What what sport though? This is all basketball. Okay. Go ahead. So utah Jazz wow, that's a good one. Uh, didn't know golden state to be how about this, uh, portland Trailblazers, he knows that one's easy sports. All right, scottie pippin, baby. Was he in that? I almost believed him. I think he is. I don't think he was. Wait, you know what sandy danto talked about scottie pippin. I don't know. I obviously we don't know. We know scottie pippin was chicago bull. I know But he was you know why you thought that why because we were with sandy danto in portland and he was talking about Um, see it's all association. I'll give me some football teams. Okay. Uh, we'll start pretty easy. LA, babe The los angeles. What there's different ones. Okay. Well, too, but the rams good los angeles. Um chargers

Yeah, I guess technically. Yeah, technically. Yes. Yeah And then los that's it. Uh, chicago what The the football teams. Yeah The bears good. Yeah, that one's easy. New york Which one? Yeah, okay. Both of this. He's like jets and new york patriots No, no, no buffalo buffalo bull bills. That's also good to you. That's a good team. Buffalo bills New york jets new york giants. Yes, new england. You know that patriots. Yes, uh, cleveland browns

He even knows the deep cuts. Well, I played techno bowl Yeah, I've played games in houston. What houston houston oilers. They yeah, that's techno bowl Yeah, they're not houston oilers anymore. What are they? Uh, texans. Well, but here's where you're left and think you guys fucked up because those are old teams The new ones. I don't know There are new ones like carolina panthers. Oh, but see, you know it. That's what they're called. Now. You're just showing off Is that what they're called? There's new ones like panther Yeah, yeah, yeah

Now here's where you're gonna get in trouble hockey. That's tough. Okay. Give me some Um, let's see. Here's chicago Uh, blackhawks. Yes, but he knows enough because he played hockey. Oh, what you don't know I play ice hockey We've never talked about this on the podcast. Can I tell you something? He is an amazing ice like a figure skater We've never talked about this. He is elegant. When did you play? Listen, everyone listen to right now. Okay, papa, right the slap king, right? He's a king, correct? Yeah, kings know things. All right, and I have physical attributes that people don't even fucking know it. Yes I'm shaped like a dumpling. Right. Yes. I'm round. All right. In fact, right, but papa can ice skate

Papa can play tennis. He can play ping pong and he also can play. Um, he can wrestle Can I also tell you guys something please look in the closet? He has his own pair of skates. Yeah I have a pair of hockey skates powers. How did you do that for play hockey since I was five? Whoa, yeah, I play ice hockey. I could skate backwards. I know how to play. I know the rules we went to um Adam Sandler's Christmas party at the pickwick about four years ago and bobby Brought his own skates because he thought that in his head that if he was impressive on the ice that he could be friends Were you gonna just skate at a party?

Well, I didn't think All right, all right Number one, okay It's not as if I don't like if you asked Adam Sandler, who's bobby Lee, he wouldn't know who I am I've just had like limited discussions with him. And yes, I thought that if I was like jassing it up on the ice, right? I didn't realize the 10,000 people go to his Christmas party. Oh, it's not like a small No, when they asked me they're like, you want to go to Adam Sandler's Christmas party? I thought there's gonna be like 50 people there. I'm gonna make it. Yeah, I'm gonna make yeah

I'm breaking my own ice skates. He made me fucking drive to like thousand oaks to get his fucking skate sharpen. Yeah And he was the only guy who brought his own skate. Yeah. Yeah, and I did backward skating And we didn't run into him once at the party. He did an eagle party. No, he had he his band played Yeah, so they were in this one place where everyone was And then we were just at the ice skating rink, but it was still a fun fucking party. It was how fun was that so fun? Yeah, there was like little video games and little the sections that you go and um a lot of comics and it was fun I can't wait to get to the bobby lee party

when is that you know, I used to have a um You know, there used to be a spaghetti factory. I've talked about this before I would love to do a gigantic Tiger belly birthday party this prom babe. We decided on a prom. No, I want I want to go to a place And this is the real I want maybe we'll try a book with the peppa at the universal city walk. I've done it there also For a birthday I want to do a birthday party where certain members of tiger belly fans can go

Like the diehard ones like uh, it's is it like a lottery? It's not just a lottery. Maybe people need to do like a um an essay video submission or a video submission or an essay But we we we do 15 people 20 people and then we'll invite maybe 150 comics guests Crazy celebrity right and I have a big rent out a big section of book with the peppo You know, I mean, you'll have to spend some of my money, but that's fine. I like festival festive things and I think this September Is the right time to do it because papa's honest networks sitcom papa um

That show I think it's going to get picked up Uh, can we also do a prom then? Because I want a prom redo What'd be a prom redo? I just I I need I need a reason to get into a ball gown again To do it on your own, bitch. I ain't gonna do it. We're gonna do a prom right? You're gonna do one on your own lady. You're gonna be my date. I gotta go shit, bro Prom prom king though. Look at me. She's demanding. She because she's an actress now Wow

Nancy, uh next week. She was actually really she was actually really good at it. No, she killed. I killed it Okay, okay. I I want to take the credit but also you guys. Yeah, it wasn't like I was playing a character I was playing myself Stop you were playing a character because if you're when people try to play themselves They try they overdo it you like if someone doesn't know you're like, oh that girl is just being real right now Yeah, your yourself is a character Also, okay. Well, then thank you. Yeah, it was pretty good. Also Roger wasn't that bad. Roger wasn't that bad either I'm like, okay. Can you I forgot what was that?

Well before our sponsor you were talking about uh, we talking about Roger. Oh, yeah, because Roger I mean if you guys saw how The whole thing that was filmed between Bobby and Roger Bobby was verbally abusing him. It was the funniest thing I had ever seen at the table calling him like a draft dodger Yeah, that is weak, you know, you know, man, they put any of that. Yeah, I didn't put any of that in and it was weird But you know what that's not our responsibility Because they had to condense it for that format. So it's like, you know, you do a lot of things and you try things and they cut it out Yeah, that's just the name of the game. Also when Theo and I were talking here on the couch

Theo was saying some I couldn't keep a straight face. Maybe that's why they couldn't put that part in you didn't laugh once in that whole thing And that's why I bought it. But I'm telling you right now I laughed hysterically so many times because he would just like off the top of his head. You know how he talks Yeah, we gotta get him back. We gotta get him back. I love him. We love Theo Vaughan more than a year. We're getting back No, I'm being real. Yeah. Are you being sarcastic? No, we should get him back. Okay, good I want him. Did you go out a lot on pilot season ever asked you pilot season? Yes, and no, what I mean. Well, what's going on towards the end while I'm trying to sell

Three shows. Yeah, but you didn't go out at all or no, I did go out There wasn't a lot of good roles for this type and a lot of stuff was offered this year They were Celeb two people with a lot of credits. Wow So that's how they're doing it now a lot of the new kids were like which we were going crazy like going out like for everything last year This year was like Not really and if you weren't you it was all the indian people. There were a lot of indian pilots Oh, really? It was like the hottest Asians are in our indians

Wow, three like indian pilots. Yeah, there's three indian pilots. Yeah, that's cool Because you didn't go out a lot. No, but after uh more probably guest star auditions after that after the season I really just been thinking about you and um, I really really seriously need you to make it here He's he's he's carving his own path though because he's just writing his own. Yeah. Yeah. I just really need you to um Step it up a bit. Okay. Okay. Thank you so much What else is going on with you? Uh, I don't ever talk to you You know when you come into my house, right and you come in you give me a pound with your warthand

Well, you just listen to warthand and um, you're very bit distant lately toward me You don't call me. You don't really talk to me. What time I texted you you did not respond But that's just a given. It was on your birthday Oh my bad. Yeah, I put I wrote your name on my butt cheek and I sent that And you sent me a thing. Yeah, remember I send a thing of like congratulating you or something Your birthday or like the show and I please don't show that on the camera. Yeah, but have I'm not going to but have I hurt you? No You I've never hurt you. What do you mean hurt me like physically? No, I have ever like, you know, just made you mad where you went

I'll fuck that guy Uh, when we first met but I know we got on fight once but then I realized that was like Remember it was like episode 60 something. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We threatened to leave or something. Yeah. Yeah Yeah, it was a power movie on that now, but no, yeah, no, not I've never felt hurt by you. I really haven't Do you love me? I talked to my mom about this. No, do you love me? No, I'm telling you I talked to my mom. Oh my god. I do Do you love me more though? No, I want you to be completely honest. I this is a time and place for it because I might not ask you

apron is no, no, I I love both of you. No, do you love me more though? I probably we're closer. So I probably love you. Thank you Yeah And no, no, and that's the truth and that's fine and I can take it and I love it because it's honesty Yeah, but can I just say this? Yeah, right? That's here now But do you love her more than me? No I love you the same I'm so sorry. I didn't know that I love you more than I didn't know that I love you the same

All right, I feel bad. I'm kidding babe. Come on. No. Hey, he's big serious. Hey, babe. Come on. I'm right here He's big serious. Hey, baby. Hey, hey, baby. Twinsy. Do you love more? George, uh, you call Lila. Thank you. Wow. He's gonna remember that, you know So for all you motherfuckers, I think I'm a bitch. Yeah, I you know, here's the thing. I'm not here's the thing I know that buzzfeed put out that thing of the best podcast celebrity podcast out there I didn't even see that. Do you know what? No, yeah, they put um, did you did you say motherfuckers instead of motherfrikers? Oh, he's oh, what is that shirt? Wait, what is that shirt? Nothing just my new favorite shirt. Georgia's shirt says this guy This guy loves that fan. Have you been wearing it the whole time?

Where'd you get that shirt? He made it. I know he made it. Dude. There's a lot of great merch available online my friend No, yes over 20 options and that what that one says what this guy loves that that fan has two thumbs up, dude Wait, hold on. Is that from his website? No, there's some other uh, not it might be teespring or something else like that. So people are just awesome options Wow What are some of them? You know, those are all coming because of uh um, what is it uh Datfan knows

Yes, he does It's just all basically every cliche shirt from the 90s just with datfan in it. I love it datfan coca-cola logo Oh, right. Oh, yeah, I gotta get one order me one medium. Oh shit. What? We fucked up. What? Oh, um, so we Me nervous. No, we were supposed to be wearing a certain shirt today Remember from the woman with the um son who is a non-verbal Sookie sookie. Yes, that one Fuck ilean. I fucked up. They're in um

Um, they're in the bedroom, but now it's too late. We can't wear it now. We'll do it next week. Okay. We're in it. We're in it back story Um, a woman named ilean Grab the shirt. No, no, don't grab it. It's fine. We'll do it next week a woman named ilean emailed us And said that she listens to tiger belly constantly around her house and her son jameson is um non-verbal autistic And the only thing that he um, he apparently he loves our intro song with you singing gibberish and he Goes around the house demanding that his mom play the sookie sookie song. So she made shirts

Um with the word sookie sookie in honor of jameson and in honor of his love for your music babe And we were supposed she came to your ontario show and she gave us shirts and we were supposed to wear it In honor of jameson and we did not I failed We'll do it next week kids really do love you I said a joke this weekend and I and this there was a I looked I improvised a joke And then the look on a lady's face when I said it I broke my heart really like because she was like with me the whole time and then I said it

I said I love going on a girl going down on a girl Especially when they queef Especially when they're on their period because it sprays on your face I'm right and then I you look like Tyler Durden, you know Yeah Right and then I said that joke and I looked down at her and you can just tell her that she just Her she just shut down Why if she was like I want to get out of here

I may be so sad. Maybe she has PCOS and she's sensitive about not getting her period Maybe she's what are we into time? This is a weird one, huh? Uh, no, we're almost about 50. Dang babe. That's hella short. Let's keep talking We didn't even hit an hour. I'm sick. Okay. Hang on. Here's what I'm nervous about. Yeah, but don't be but now What are we doing? I'm nervous about something What are we doing? We have you and I have to do your mom's house with Tom Segura and Christina Pizitzki Tomorrow, we're both sick. Yeah I don't know how I can get sick too with either of them. You coming with us

Uh, if you want me to how are we getting there? I can drive. I'm sick. I'll drive Yeah, tomorrow. We're doing Tom Segura show. It'll be fine. No, I work. I'm gonna because there's no no They're because I love those two. They're too funny guy people and it'll be great Listen guys. Listen to me right now. Not everything has to be perfect Never not everything has to be the way people want it to be. You know, sometimes just like You know, did I want to talk about Independence Day? No You mean I want to talk about

You know But we did. Yeah And that's life. Well, then let's just get to the questions then go ahead. We'll do two. Okay Our helpful advice with Bobby Kalila and George Hello, the tiger belly crew. I'm a big fan of the podcast Actually, the only podcast I listened to I emailed you because I came across this youtube video involving an interracial couple and I wanted to hear bobbing Kalila's opinion on this a Korean man

Justin is in a relationship with a Sudanese Filipino female Sarah Justin brought Sarah to meet his parents unannounced. The parents did not approve Especially the mother and would not let Sarah into the house nor talk to her In my opinion, we live in a great diverse society that has many different cultures religions and race Definitely in our generation We were raised in a multicultural society It allowed us to appreciate the difference between cultures provide us with an open eye perspective to other parts of the world

And engage in a diverse group as a second generation immigrant. I'm very accepting to interracial relationships The question is when bobby first introduced Kalila to his parents. What was the reaction? I wanted to say this Okay, how accepting were they? It's the guy's fault The Korean guy. Yeah, I'll tell you why You you think that my brother and I right have little liberal parents No, they're traditional Koreans that have fucked up views about society Right We hate

Filipino we you know all growing up. We hate indian Yeah, only Korean number one, right? With the finger. Yeah Black people should not be president. Yeah, that kind of shit. Yeah, right And you look at your parents and go if you if you don't change that right now. I'm never talking to you again That's fucking crazy And then they realized through years of us just being like You know being gay is fine

Okay, it's fine then Right. You you train them Yeah, you each they're they're an extension of you your parents And if like if if my parent with my dad said I'm gonna vote for Trump, right? I just like all right. Well, we're done. I'm done They know that No, they're gonna they're gonna they're gonna abide by the rules

Set out for us They're all men are created equally There's no difference, right being gay is an abomination. They're you're just born that way because of fuck, right? And this guy didn't train his parents Because let me say this right now if I brought my fucking girlfriend this fucking, you know, I mean island gook right There's island gook to my house

And I go, hey mom and dad, this is Kalila. Oh, she don't go inside. Well, I'm not going inside and I'll see you later And we'd get a hotel room and I'd eat her pussy In that hotel room, right? I think you know what you're right because I think that you told her I was Filipino Yeah, but you didn't tell her I was half. Yeah, because when she saw me she goes, oh I thought you were Filipino, but you're so pretty Yeah And I say if like a Filipino couldn't otherwise be and I was like, oh thanks

Yeah, now if she was ugly, that's a different That's different also nighting her pussy But you know like here's what it not ugly. What I'm saying is is that My parents here's what here's what they want, right? They don't care necessarily about race You know or they care more about Their heart What their heart is like

So it's like when Kalila was helping my dad with his medical stuff waking up early And really trying to engage with them. They get what that is and they go, oh, this is a good person You know my my ex-girlfriend Christine She's a nice girl and I'm not saying anything about she's married now. I'm very happy for her But she was a little standoffish with my parents and they were fine with her But they they didn't fall in love with her Like they fell in love with Kalila. They really love Kalila like an extension They loved Sarah because Sarah's much like Kalila in that way

I think that your mom likes easy people Yes, she likes people who are like just go to the living room squad on the floor low maintenance Yeah, and if Sarah seems like she was probably very similar. She's very similar in that way but low maintenance. Yeah but um But there was again, there was nothing wrong with Christina, you know, she was a cool girl, you know They just wasn't that connection, you know um, I think this guy um If I was that guy, I would just be like

Well, I'll see you later mom and dad and just move on with his life I know it's difficult to do and I know that sounds crazy, but To me I it's embarrassing It's like when you know, I talked to white dude. Yeah, my parents voted for trump It's like, oh But that just would not happen with my parents Because you know, what if you went home And then you saw like an old like

Ballot or whatever like a stub like let's say they had receipts And you saw that all this time they'd be like bobby we didn't vote we didn't vote But they actually voted for trump like what would what would happen after that Well, I would probably go did you vote for trump and they would say, oh, yeah, okay. We did we did right? Okay, I'm fine with it Really? Yeah Um, you guys don't have cell phones anymore by the world

You can't communicate with the outside world. No, I mean because I pay for their cell phones. Yeah So that's cut off. Yeah, they go, okay And I go and the four thousand dollars I send you every month that's done Oh, but Yeah, bye That's how and that and now that sounds crazy, right? Yeah. Yeah, I know it sounds crazy But I think I believe that I stand by it I don't think I'll go ahead. I don't think you could do what cut your parents off. I don't think so either

I think you love your parents too much from everything you talk about you love your parents too much. I'm the same way with mine Let me think let me think let me think Let me think let me think let me think Revisit revisit. Yeah, maybe you're right. You love them too much. It's a condition that's a tough one Well, um, I guess leave this lose a girlfriend then Cut the girlfriend off I don't know what else is her. I watched some of these videos of this couple they vlog her family I she her father

Disowned her as well because he was Korean and was not going to be a muslim and that was a whole Yeah, I mean, you know what? You know what? It's like At the end of the day, it's like, you know, I really believe who gives a fuck, but you know There's old traditional things And my mommy keeps saying Bobby if you were gay, I'd be fine with it. No, you wouldn't have been You know, but you know at least us Coloco and I right if we had kids. I think that we would be a lot more open

And you know, yeah, well, I'm a product of you know, Multiracial like if our daughter said I'm dating a black guy, I'd be fine Would you? Yeah, I would invite a man to show me your skills I feel like you really would. You know what I mean? He'd have to do basketball or like rap or something. You know, man, but let me show you Can you explain to me the deep rooted racism that exists in the asian community that's so kept hush hush But it's so deeply rooted against

black people What Do you want him to answer you want him to answer that for all of asians? I can call jessica I think I think that I think there is a cross-section of every ethnicity that has a problem with other ethnicities in colors No, I'm not saying younger generation of koreans. No, what I'm saying is is that it's It's something, you know, people are afraid of things that they don't know, right? Yeah

Like for instance, um, I'll give you an example and this is going to be a little farfetched in your eyes. Okay But it's this it's um We were at the dog park You and I one time And guess who was at the dog park a pig A pig. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah the instagram pig. Yeah, there was an instagram pig famous one at the dog park And my kalilah was like You could go come meet the pig

And I go no She said why not because I don't want to love it She's like why because I I'm going to continue to eat them Just just hear like Just hear me out. Just hear me out. Okay, bro. Listen to bro. All right. I'm on board right? It's like people from the south, right? They don't have muslin friends. Why? Because they don't want anything that for them to change their worldview Right, they're happy with their worldview. They're happy with their worldview

So if they they're if they they're afraid that if they bring in a muslin in their circle That they might oh my god They're just regular like us and they're good people and you know, I mean, wow here my worldview is changing Right. I see where you're trying to go But it's hard for me to believe that someone is so dead set and happy with their worldview that they're not willing to Try it because they're afraid of it. I agree. I think that everyone should be open and they would try it. What except the pigs? It was just an example of it like chickens either. I don't know a chicken because I want to eat them Yeah, I don't want anyone that anything to change my worldview

Now I'm starting to feel like we're just talking about foods that you like to eat my pet chicken cook cook eight chicken So that's why I kept eating chicken. You guys don't get what I'm saying. It's fine. I'm sick. So it doesn't matter Yeah, I just say what I want to say you're sick. Do you have another email or no? I want you want to talk about the chinese dress No, let's talk about a difference. Well, we do need to get your reaction when bought your parents met bobby Oh, I'm a product of Mom's initial reaction. Yeah, like I'm an interracial child. Why I'm a multiracial child. My parents don't give a shit My dad is part egyptian. My mom's filipino

Spanish whatever There's no That would be so hypocritical of them to say. Hey, like why are you bringing home a black guy? Why are you bringing home a korean? Why they don't give a shit. They never gave a shit In fact, I have never heard them give me they've never given me a hard time about any race of people at all And I really appreciate that about them even my mom. She never nagged you once about be with filipino, honey Actually, my mom. That's the only thing she doesn't want me. It's a filipino. Yeah, um, I think she has an idea that filipino men are a certain way

and she That's the one type that she has always been like stay away from the filipino men Thanks. Stay away from my pee. Yeah, it's weird, but I get what she's saying It's not all filipino men are like that, but there's a specific type that she that Encountered that were like husbands of her sisters that she was like no, no, no So, uh, any shows for bobby? Hold on a second. What about what about your parents? Um, do they care that Cindy is taiwanese? Uh, I don't think they care now. I think before it was, uh,

I think their mind always like filipino catholic filipino catholic That's so weird for me because I feel like koreans are like, okay, mary another korean for sure But filipinos have never I've never heard another filipino say you have to marry filipino and they never say you had to But I think that was like their preference Dang, that's new to me and then it turned into when they started seeing me dating white girls They're like just asian just trying to keep it abroad asian What about you george? They just want me to get married and have grandkids. Yeah, they don't care what they are my mom. That was a great tiger belly guys

Oh My parents want me to get thank you so much for the podcast listening guys mental prisons Check us out on itunes and spotify. Are we on spotify? Yeah, check us out on all the platforms all things comedy any shows I'm in caligurian like three weeks two weeks. Is that the right one everybody that was in the other Calgary It wasn't an error on our part. It was an error on I just write down what's on the copy and paste And it was vancouver on the list and I wrote vancouver. So calgrass. Yeah, it's actually calgary. Yes It's the first time bobby's doing calgary. So everybody come out and see him show up tiger belly

Uh, anything else? That's it. Thank you watch. I'm spilling up together. Okay. Thank you Uh, we have a new clips channel on youtube. Uh, tiger belly clips. Check it out Tiger belly clips. Uh, subscribe, please so we can open up all the new ones Sorry youtube channel. What's that? Was that our actual youtube channel? Just tiger belly. Good stuff, george. Just tiger. Yeah, all one word George, can you turn it off now? I want to talk to him about something. Okay. Uh, so make sure you follow us on instagram at tiger belly On twitter at the tiger belly emails any questions and thank you so much for all your breakup with girl questions But let's uh try some different unhelpful advice questions guys. I love your and that's an unhelpful Or that's a tiger belly at gmail.com. You can follow cloud on all social media at calamity k

And for more, um for more stuff bring in the fucking clown Bobby the live dot com and you can follow george at just instagram george underscore kimmel Send in the clouds rip it rip it and that's it. Check out independence day And make sure you blue apron dot com new movie called independence day Oh, uh, slash belly slash belly. Bye guys Hey Prime members, you can listen to Tiger Barely Ad-Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today, or you can listen Ad-Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcast. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at wondry.com slash survey.