TigerBelly - Episode 143: Joey Diaz & American Ingenuity

Episode Date: May 23, 2018

Coco and Bobo talk lobster tails, fat balls, Santeria, signs from the universe, and how to make an extra $27 in one night.Support us by supporting our sponsors!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey Prime members, you can listen to Tiger Belly add free on Amazon music download the app today Hey Five four three two Everybody Big fat Cuban in the house Welcome to another episode of the great The great Bobby Lee's here the one the wonder the wonder lost. Yeah, the wonderful Bob Lee captain

I'm at the precipice of life and everyone knows that okay. We got George in the house with his four eyes We got um, this is dude. I'm this is pure gook. Yeah, we got pure Asian fucking right look at that face Newbie pale white droopy. That's what Asian people are supposed to look like Gilbert. Sorry. I'm not Yeah, you got to tan we got We got here my girlfriend Kali like you beautiful Yeah, we got him and we got me and we got a special guest tonight guys Hey, everybody You're ready for big fat Cuban stuff

We got my old friend dude my old friend Joey Coco Diaz give him a round of applause everybody Everybody was up. No, stop Bobby Lee dude. It's been a pleasure having you in my home very much for how many times I've done years a couple of times Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, you always trying to get me on nine o'clock perfect They've been asking me for you, but I'm like, you know You know, I don't like asking people because I want people to say no, no fucking ask But you you said yes, right away. Yeah, your family. I was I was very honored that you'd even have me Yeah, you're a criminal, aren't you? I am opening with that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, because I was in Canada

And I and the club owner at Calgary was like, what should I bring here? I go what acts I go first foremost Joey Diaz and he goes can't even get in the country and then I go. Oh, yeah, he has criminality is criminal. Yeah You hit somebody with a pipe. What happened a loneous. Can you hit somebody with a pipe? No, I kidnap somebody. Oh, that is close I did a drug rip. You did a drug rip. Yeah, like you show up and you're supposed to have cash, but you have dick Yeah, yeah, yeah That was I was in Denver. What is that in Colorado? Yeah, and then Boulder a Boulder, Colorado. That's I've heard of it Yeah, there's Cubans out there. No, I went out there because they were looking for me in Jersey

Yeah, yeah, you went out. I was a hellion man. Yeah, you were a hellion. It's so funny. I'm When I met you I was just crossing over Like that's what I was crossing over Like once I got to the comedy store. I was still a criminal. I'll still throw a glass at you I'll still throw a bottle at you. You know me. I'm still an animal Yeah That thief and shit and all that scamming shit went away because I saw other scammers up there And I saw how bad it looked. It's a full house of scammers. That's a full house of scammers

What's cleaned out now, but before it was like dead wood. You had to go in there and fucking rock the house You had to rock the house. You had to fucking always check your back pocket always Right You know when I was up there addicted to coke, you know the first fucking 10 years Yeah, it's not blow and fucking I feel bad because I used to when I was using drugs I used to give you pills all the time. Yeah. Do you remember that? Oh, yeah, please. I eat them I know you I know you would. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He wouldn't even ask me He would just look at me and I would just pull it out. Oh, wow, and he would just eat them

And I just eat them. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. I trust If the FDA approves them, fuck it. We're good. You know what I'm saying? Don't be giving me that ching ching shit Make my dick hard for two days. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm not gonna give you no change You know, it's so crazy. I've never been addicted to pain medication Like the big thing in this country now is the opiate problem People give me a Viking to do something like a couple weeks right through the podcast and a dude had A stash of pills on a Sunday at like 12 like just give me whatever Just to get the party started. Yeah. I was fucked up

For like 10 fucking hours on pills like 10 fucking hours. I can't I don't have that type of time I think it's hard for three hours. You know what I'm saying? We smoke a joint, watch a movie. Yeah. Yeah. But ten hours. I was roasted. I took the pills like mid-podcast But the time I got in my car was sizzled. It was like one o'clock in the afternoon. It was opiates. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah And I was high till 10 jack like yeah, my wife's like you okay. Yeah. Yeah. Hey the edible That was no edible. That was straight up fucking opiate And I'll tell you what the next day. I'm like, that's fine. I got high. I got no regrets. I did it I manned up to it. Wow, but I'll never do I don't know how people do that on a daily basis

Do you never because you never got physically addicted maybe maybe that you're mentally strong? No, I got I got hooked on all that shit like I got hooked. I went through phases Yeah, like when I first started comedy I was selling xanax. I was selling valium. Oh And you know the bringer shows. Yeah, that's how I would bring people I'm American ingenuity So even though you'd call me 11 o'clock strung out. Yeah, nothing till eight o'clock at the comedy store And I made your pay. What the fuck joey this annex only cost me a quarter. I would sell them for $1.50 So I would just give you four on the house, man. You made me come all the way to

I was making a move. Yeah, meet me at the comedy store at eight. Meet me at the comedy store at eight Meet me at the comedy store at eight. Thanks. You know, I got eight people So ingenuity come on American ingenuity is what you're calling it with immigrant mentality I'm a lethal weapon. You are What a one on a weapon. Yeah, dude You know, and that's so I I saw xanax when I first got divorced I had this fucking mexican dude in longmont, colorado I had a trailer and half the trailer was pills and heroin. Yeah, everyone by the way has a mexican dude

I had one paul. Yeah, I had my guy Paul once a week and he would give me You remember the old days crackers would come in a tin Saltine crackers. Yeah, he'd give me a tin like every time I go to like we eat a mexican food Yeah, yeah, I give him an envelope and he'd give me a tin and I take it home like it was crackers like those cookies Those french cookies. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Meanwhile. I had fucking a hundred and thousands annexes in there the valley Wow And then I sold that shit for a while then I got off that and I just went to new york and sold coke One thing I was a very very good coke salesman. I never took a pinch for cocaine. You can't fucking get me at all

You couldn't get me. Yeah, I knew when they came as a matter of fact A da agent came to my show on saturday and gave me a card and he goes I heard you one time in a podcast. He goes, you got all the procedures down I know exactly when somebody comes and they're looking for For fucking they're an undercover cop. So I never took a pinch for fucking drug sales or possession. None of that shit My shit was straight up robberies. It's amazing. You're not dead It is. Is it not? I almost died a few times. I almost died in bowmont, texas. Can you imagine that?

I did fucking at the top of these bowmont texas after the longest yard And I went down there on fire. You know what it is. Yeah, you're fine. Remember when you went on the road to get high Yeah, I done that. Yeah, I've done that. Yeah, there's a time when you go on the road to get fucking high You call the guy the doorman at the club. Yeah, you got a cousin who's fucked up Like on tuesday. Yeah, I'm coming tomorrow. I don't want no slip-ups. Yeah And this news you get to the club they give you a draw And you just bang out that drug deal and he's good for the like I used to go on the road for drugs I used to go on the road to fuck. I mean

I believe it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, of course. When Paulie we got did like I didn't do open for Paulie for the money Yeah, yeah, it's like did come on and see the round, right? I'd be like, yeah pussy And then you would go, you know, you would go and there's no offense to Paulie and his fans But at that time They were easily manipulated You can manipulate them easily. Oh, I was there with Joe Rogan with fear factor I had women say to me look me in the face and go, I'll do anything to meet Joe Rogan. Yeah What's the story? He's playing the flute? No, and then I would give him like a code. You want to play the flute?

Yeah, I played the flute. Okay, play that fucking flute. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They play the flute And then that's why I got banned from the tempi impromptu the first time I brought some freak up there, right? Yeah, sucked dick and then she started sucking Everybody's dick and she eventually sucked a busboy that was 17. You know how that It's not the impromptu to have those young guys Yeah, yeah, yeah He lost his fucking mind. Yeah. Yeah. The next day. What's his name Danny Murr? Yeah, imagine me the guy that didn't get his dicks up She sucked everybody's dick

Like she sucked my dick I took her upstairs and I just left her there like she took the tits out in the old green room Started playing with a pussy. I'm like, I'll be right back. I can get the fuck out of it. I just left her there And they found the like passed out. Yeah, she that's why Danny Murr was mad at me because she blew a 17 year old busboy that night That Danny Murr though, huh? Yeah, Danny Murr. God rest his soul. He's dead. He was a creepy motherfucker. Yeah, Danny Murr died Yeah, about two a year ago two years ago. Well, I thought mark anderson died mark anderson killed himself But Danny Murr died Danny Murr went to chicago. He was sick. He was ill after that. Oh, man I didn't know that's feel bad That sucks. I wouldn't do I wouldn't do the comedy game is a deadly motherfucker. Do you remember warlock?

You staying out with paul? Yes, I do. So I was on a tour bus with paulie warlock looks like a warlock Right, he's got skinny arms. He's still in san diego. No, I think he lived moved to chicago Right, but he's just like kind of you know, um, you know the lord of the rings movie the the one that was feeding the king the lies worm tongue You gotta remember worm tongue. Well, that's um warlock, okay? And paulie goes this these two college kids from columbia girls not kids girls from columbia in columbia Right, they blew me steve somone a bunch of people and then paulie goes. What about that guy? And I saw them blow warlock

And their faces I will never forget It was like eating like rotten You know me food They were just like, you know, man, like they were gonna get sick, but they did it and I just I don't know. I just liked it Oh, okay All right. I mean watching it was like fun. You know what I mean? Is that what does that mean to me? Do you ever think about? The disgusting things You did on the road with people and how?

Like that was one that I was telling me and lee I took lee to the store with me on the way up to hell Yeah, we were telling I was telling them from the road like triple runs like 91. Oh my god 93 95 we do a feature act like The disgust that I saw like what I saw at the comedy store Was enough like I saw sexual perversion Harvey Weinstein type shit. Yeah. Yeah, women going there on dates and sucking dick I mean on the way to the bathroom like you hanging out by the woman's bathroom Yeah, I can and next thing you know, let me give you a tour of the holidays. I want a comedy store

Like how many women I saw I know up there It was crazy especially if like Mike young and some of these are around You'd see a girl walking in the hall is and they disappear And they're in the bathroom somewhere with my getting a letter from a girl one time Like I when I was when I first moved to LA There was a girl that would hang out there on sunday nights. Yeah And she was a sweet girl, you know, whatever. I never you know, I'm saying like she wasn't my type whatever I just didn't look at her that way

And years later. I got a letter at the comedy store and it was her Saying that thank you that there were animals She goes I got I almost got raped up there and all this shit But you were the only one that was nice to me on sunday nights because I used to host Yeah, yeah, I did that too and she said she's like I'll never go back out there Yeah, like she was cracked like how many people have come and gone in the time that you and I Have you know what's crazy? I just thought was that I remember you and I In the late 90s. We're at in san antonio for the latino laugh festival

And I remember you and I didn't have any money like dollars between. Yeah, we asked worthy paterson to take us to eat Right and he goes. Oh, all right, you know, but we couldn't even eat That's how little money that we had 50 bucks a set. They paid us. They sent us a check Two weeks later. It took him a month that fucking scumbag. Jeff out there. Yeah. Yeah, no per diem No playing picket. Yeah, I did. I mean I had to do a night in fucking Some town with the cousin Jeff all does his cousin. Yeah, Jeff out there is a somebody in the festival had a cousin who played like the organ And he booked a room on thursdays. Yeah. Yeah in some fucking bar. Yeah

So I had to do that just to have a little bit of money to put down on the room because I didn't have an atm card Yeah, so it would make you give them 35 dollars cash deposit and that would bust me Yeah, I couldn't afford 20 dollars for a fucking breakfast at a hotel. It's just amazing to think that like There's a bunch of us that are doing well now But back then it was just like how should we keep doing this? Right, didn't you get that feeling like are we ever gonna and then to see like when I see you now How successful your podcast is how you're like selling out rooms and just you know, you're you're like this We stuck with it. We stuck with it. Yeah, that's all it is. I know, but it's not special. We I didn't say I didn't say I was special

It's so funny. How did I say I was special? It's so funny how we were having a conversation And you and I are those people that never got the smoke blown up our ass We put our pants on one leg at a time. Like I don't It's so funny that he just said that because the thing is the truth I have never been like, you know, how like there's that hot guy who has a lot of buzz around him Who is going to the festival and he got a deal? I was never that guy. I will never be that guy And I want I've always wanted to be that guy. That's easy

You know for me I've always been like, all right, I'm gonna have to get through the back door I have to get through the back door. Where are those guys today? Gone. That's 99 and 2000. We got half million dollar deals Right. Whoa. Those guys had gone today. Some of our dead chicken died. Chicken died. Mitch Hedberg died. Yeah, you know, I know Those deals would destroy people Because you get a deal And let's say three yards signs you and your deal doesn't get picked up three yards drops you and people gonna go If three yards couldn't do nothing with him, what am I gonna do with him? Yeah, so those people would you know chicken for example

Yeah, chicken. Yeah, first time I saw a chicken I didn't get it. Oh, you didn't like it. No, I didn't get it. Oh, yeah I didn't get it. I'll never forget he the day he got signed and he got his first deal Yeah, the big news in town was that he walked into three yards naked Like I'm supposed to fuck them be impressed like I take my dick out every night. Nobody says nothing Yeah, I mean he walks into three yards naked and he's brilliant. Yeah, he's white. That's why it was People pull out the dicks. There's like How much fun do we have with the comedy store? Do you remember that night that there was a girl heckling?

I tell the story all the time because I was flat fucking broke And I think bobby was starting to bust already a little bit Yeah, and the girl came I went up on stage and some girl heckled me. She goes take your dick out And I go I'll take my dick out if you take your pussy out. It was a friday Fear factor was just Coming on and fucking this check came on stage dropped the pants took a little clam out Had a little fucking thinness of hair right above the cliff dropped the pants and I took my dick out And bobby lee and joe rogan came to this. I remember the people who were standing outside ran in

Oh my god, the place was packed and bobby lee and joe rogan were throwing money at me and me I was so broke. I actually picked up that And bought a grandma blow from fucking chewy. You understand me? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, like I think I got 27 dollars on the stage I was so happy. Yeah, I had a grandma blow and a pack of cigarettes. I'm good for taking out my dick That's success jack. I'm a friday night at the store. Plus. I'm getting 15 next friday joe joe Showed me a photo at the brea improv of you and in the bathroom with a girl And I've never seen so many veins on a penis

That was crazy. Yeah, do you remember that? That's right. That's right. Your penis is so veiny. Yes, that's right. You like it I don't fucking know. I'm an old man. I know, but do you like that the veins and all that? What the fuck? I don't know. What do you mean? It doesn't matter if I like it It doesn't matter what I like. No, I'm just giving you props. I'm not making fun of you. No, no, no I don't know. I don't know. Congratulations with all the veins. I mean the blood's coming through nicely. Yeah, the blood's coming through nicely. Yeah, yeah, you gotta have blood. And then joe used to do this. Just every night he did this He'd go home. You get where would he sleep? Where would you sleep in the bathtub in the bathtub? Yeah, yeah I remember yeah with the pillow with the sleep apnea. Yeah with the flea apnea and he'd have the shower on right?

Yeah, I live in the poly. It's so weird. It's so weird That you could buy a house in Wildland Hills pay two million dollars and after 15 minutes you run out of hot water You're like, what did I pay three mil for to run out of hot water? Right? Yeah. Yeah, I lived Maybe four blocks from here. I lived on 1440 North Schrader All right, you don't live there. You don't live in there in Marnaya. That building has been there since Jesus left Chicago I could go in the shower one in the morning Put the hot water on and wake up at eight in the morning and still have hot water

And the paint would be peeling off the fucking boy. Yeah Because I had sleep apnea and that's the only way I could sleep Was if I took a Tylenol p.m. I'd pop like six of them I'd do like an eight ball and pop six Tylenol pms And fucking go in the tub put a garbage can a garbage bag on the pillow That's how bad my sleep apnea was And I would sleep in the tub and that's the only way I could get like six I would get up and my skin would be like a fucking prune. Wow

You know a Whitney Houston diner No, she didn't die of cocaine. Wow. That's a lot drowning right? She died because she went into a hot tub after she did a line of coke And because she was so coked up. She couldn't feel the intensity of the heat. Oh, she boiled together boiled her What what hot what kind of hot tub is this? This is what a lot of people don't know. They don't know No, I watch I always watch that shit The last 24 hours Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's my shit. I just watched James Gandolfini and I watched the first 25 minutes to see if it was real

If they would release the cocaine reports and they did I'm like, I go. Hold on. Don't change this yet. I want to see if this show is real and sharing up They were like would a lot of people to know about James Gandolfini was he snorted with three hands He went to like nine rehabs a lot of people didn't know that And even told you when I got when I shot grudge match. Yeah, the big rumor was that The week before Sean Penn was shooting a movie in New Orleans And Gandolfini had one day on the set one day. They were going to shoot him out in one day And that night he went to a strip club and he canceled

They couldn't find them and he said he got roofied at the strip club. Yeah, I've been there. Were you like fucking? I'm not going to work today. Yeah And they said on the show that he had a couple times. He wouldn't show up for four days in a row Wow And I worked with a guy that was heavy in the sopranos and he told me you don't know how many times he came on the set Just just went to sleep on the floor Got a pillow and we just called him he's sleeping hour Did he die with his son with his son in Italy? Yeah, he was really sad. Baby. If I ever die don't spin it

I won't spin it. Why the fuck would I spin it? No, just tell people Well, because the way I die is kind of be is going to be mysterious. It'll be a little weird I don't know. I mean, I'll probably die like just you know watching old j He's super emo. So he'll probably document something where he like goes off into a trailer in portland He'll have some like weird emo like music But like red house painters playing in the background. Yeah, it's a black and white film. Yeah, he'll do the whole thing I'll do the whole thing. Yeah, but just don't paint a different picture. I want reality, baby

Your parents are still around by me. My parents are still around. My dad had a stroke though How's he doing? He can't talk which is cool You know what I mean? He can only say I love you And that's as you know for my dad to say I love you and still be around He used to be a violent man I have talked about it on the podcast and I didn't like him for many years But I love the man and um, he's still around. He's strong. What do you mean by violent? Was he this he disciplined you with a certain? Well, no, he's to beat me with golf clubs. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, um, turn that okay

Punched my mom's mouth a bunch of times. Okay. Yeah, she'd lost a bunch of teeth. But it's an old culture Korea, that's an old you know, it's funny. I was telling uh, Steve Simone about two weeks ago We were talking about I remember the 70s I lived on a block where two women Every time you saw them they would get fucking they were getting jacked by their husbands and nobody said nothing Yeah In the 70s and 80s domestic violence is just one of those fucking things And I mean, let me tell you something one of the scariest things I ever saw

Was one of you know those holiday seasons from the 27 the 25th to the 31st One of those nights when I was about 13 Me and my mom were in the kitchen and my stepdad was sleeping and we heard a banging on the door And my mom goes hold on one second, you know, she wouldn't got a knife. It was like one in the fucking morning And I mean I can remember this like it was yesterday opening that door and that woman Which just covered him blood and then she had like a house And she's like please take me from this and he was chasing her Oh my god, as we were pulling her in she was chasing her my stepdad came down with a gun

And pointed at the guy and that's how we got rid of the fucking guy And we brought the woman in he had turned cigarettes out on her I will never ever he was putting cigarettes out on her. Oh my god. He was beaten her when she was unconscious He was waking her up with a cigarette. That's how my uh, I was it was it was horrible That's how it was for my mom to her first husband because we grew up in the philippines and my mom's philippina Um during a wedding there were about 200 people at a wedding reception Her ex-husband dragged her by her hair in front of all the wedding guests and not one person It was bad an eyelash. It was accepted people

It was an ugly taboo Were there no ass trays back then? I mean it was just uh Bobby I would have made a bunch of money if I was an ass tray maker. I have an idea. I have an idea I still remember my mother pulling fucking glass out of her like yeah, he hit her in the head with a vase But he had been beating her for like, you know 10 years. I mean every time I saw She had a bruise on it, but that memory has stayed with me My mom when she opened her mouth and she had two teeth missing because my dad punched him out

I still have that memory in my head and That's why I'm so good to women now. I you know, I'm good to you It could go either way though because the cycle could keep repeating because that's so I said to myself back then I go, you know what? No, it's not in my world. Yeah, I'm not ever gonna hit. It's not in my world anybody Especially a woman because um, I loved my mom and I was so sympathetic toward her too And to see somebody that I loved and that's why I had such a deep resentment toward my dad, but

You know, it is cultural. It's you know, it's the time period But I think things are changing in that way where I think it's getting better for everyone You know, I don't you think don't you feel that or no? Yeah, you hear yelling now you downline one more right, right? It was a time where you just close your window mind your business, you know, it's interesting You asked me a question on the way on the elevator. I didn't want to get into it with you on the elevator Because it was a question on the elevator You asked me if that was my only daughter. That's my answer is no. I have a 27 year old

But were you lied? Not in line. I just didn't want to open up the conversation with those fucking three idiots. I don't know I don't talk in front of people All right, that's a new thing. That's a new thing. Okay people talking in front of people. I don't say nothing in front of nobody I don't know your old school. Okay. I'm my bad. I don't know those people tell me about your 27 year old daughter My 27 year old daughter me having spoken And since she's like 10, but when I was three, I knew what time it was already I knew that they didn't want me around her white side of the family I could see it already and then the lie started packing it

and one of those things she said that really like Like I had to take piss tests Even though she would come to the house and take weed out of the refrigerator. I was selling weed She would come in the house with the spare key when we were separated And take weed but she went to the judge and said, you know, he smokes pot and they made me piss in the fucking thing Thank god. I knew the probation department and they wouldn't test me for weed They would test me for coke and everything else But they wouldn't test me for weed. So I would continue to smoke weed

But that's the hypocrisy. I knew this woman for a long time Yeah, but then another time we went to court and in court she said that one time I had broken her nose until this day I'm not cool with her and one of the reasons why I'm not cool is yes I was at pretty fucking I did some bad things when I was growing up, but I copped to all of them I don't like when people make shit up. Like I just went home In march and some kid I went to my seventh grade teacher's bar. He had his own to bar now He was like 70 and the kid in there pulled me outside. He was going to talk to you about something

He goes, let me years ago. You got accused or something The kid who robbed it came clean And he goes, I always knew you didn't rob it. I always when I was in trouble I was such a piece of shit that I would get accused of shit I didn't even do and I learned to live with it because that's the reputation I had If Bobby Lee's house got house got robbed I get the blame Bobby would blame how to be Joey Because Joey could be in La Jolla and I would get the blame

That's what I fear about him because he tells so many stories of like sexual deviances like in the past That I feel like anyone could fabricate a story and then be like, yeah That would that that would be in line with what he's done in the past So I always tell him to just be extra. I'm the same way, but I'll tell you the truth. Yeah. Yeah I'll tell you the fucking truth. I don't like I don't like what's going on today Yeah, I don't like that a woman came out three weeks ago and said Tom sighs more Well, last time when she's 11 And that's the reason why she does drugs. Did you guys see that interview? No, no, that could happen to anybody

any one of us Just that word on a piece of paper and we don't get any more work Yeah, yeah, we're working in the Mall of America following Jeremy Piven Because that's what that's what happens. Yeah, that's what happens before I accuse you or something I'm gonna be 100 fucking sure and I'm gonna have a witness or something. You cannot accuse me Without a witness a tape a film. I want to see it. I want to see it when Three five before my daughter was born. I met a woman at flappers one night Just very casually in the back. She was like, uh, she did something for flappers and I didn't and I

I'm an old fucking man Come on. You look great. What am I gonna do with a girl? Oh, man, I got 55 year old nuts. They look like they're 55 For a young girl to suck them. I wouldn't get no satisfaction out. I'm just fucking somebody's world up. Yeah I'm just fucking somebody's world It's like one time rogan asked me. Did you ever have a girlfriend that committed suicide? No, but if anybody sucked my dick I'd kill myself I'd kill myself. It's disgusting. Yeah, understand me. It's just disgusting. We've gone through comedy hell

Like it's disgusting and you know, I think of an indian chick and boy is the Idaho one time on the dance floor I was fingering and she had a yeast infection. How can you know? I took my hand out and it was covered in yogurt How the fuck does that happen? Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah, I mean how the fuck did you know that far? It was a good far Yeah We're gonna take a moment. We have a sponsor. Yeah There's can I just say this there's a better way to do that And when next time one of my one of my guests a special guest like this, right?

Is talking and he's in a fucking, you know in the rhythm of life, right and you pull out one of those things He's the producer. He's got to do that. Don't give him any of beating on me. I apologize You're right. I apologize. You're right. You're right. You're right. I apologize. He's doing his job I know but you know, I mean and now just It's Some of these white people you gotta fucking, you know You gotta get a bow one day if I was Asian I'd make white people bow That's true. You think you think I love that

We everybody thinks Bruce Lee's tough Bruce Lee wasn't about being tough. Yeah, Bruce Lee was a light to immigrants Before 1960 fucking eight everybody that was any other color but white you walked around like in the shadows You walked around like Harvey Weinstein in the shadows. Yeah after Bruce Lee came he opened up the door to immigrants Immigrants had a voice especially fucking Asians. Yeah Asians are like fuck with me now. Motherfuck. I got an uncle who's got stars Like I'll fuck your world up. Yeah Asians had a way. That's what Bruce Lee was. Bruce Lee was a hope for people Black people went crazy. How many black people do you ever see that think they're Chinese? Yeah, of course. He riced with chopsticks and shit. It's infused into the hip hop too. Yeah, they fucked them up Those black people got fucked up by kung fu movies. Yeah

If you grew up in the early 70s The asian could you love bro my mother took me to a santeria dude because I kept saying I'm moving to asia I had the shoes. I had the white shirt with the buttons. I was going to turn it down All dog. I had the white shirt with the blue or black With the shoes, the high cut. I used to I used to fucking burn incense in my room And my mom with a bowl of rice. All I want is rice. You can't eat rice You can't eat rice all day. You got to eat meat. Yeah. Yeah, I mean rice. You show me a fat fucking china man And she would look at me. You're right. Yeah, yeah, I've never seen a fat chinese guy just Buddha

Yeah, yeah, except for Buddha, yeah Now you don't talk to your daughter now then still. Yeah, very painful. No, but does she know you exist? Yes I was so this this 27-year-old girl out there. This knows that you exist. Absolutely knows your name. Absolutely, right? So and and I had contact with her until they yanked out of the country and took it to england And every time I remember I got a taco bell commercial that went home and she kept telling me she's too busy to see you What the fuck is she so busy? How old is she when that happened? She was eight Seven the torture started when I was about when she was about two She told me she was moving into her mother's house. She ended up moving in with a guy

In my neck of the woods. That's fucking cause for murder That's slit your throat type shit. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So I don't smile when you say that. Yeah No, no, no, no, no, no. It's just really weird when you smile slit your throat and you smile You have to be honest. I know you're being honest right now, but with your eyes and stuff. Yeah. Yeah, it's really cool It's in my Asian lines. Yeah My Charles Bronson eyes. Yeah, you have that. Yeah Yeah, so I put up with it and I tolerated it and I had the two felonies So I had to behave myself because the third one they'll say you're uh

And the boyfriend called me a spick one day and I fucking Face I said he's going down and guess what you can't use this uh racial slur In the cities who limits a boulder so they threw it out of court But after that day, I saw her crying in the car And I'm like she doesn't need this what I bring to the table What what I was bringing to the table at that time It was just I was making everybody's life and me and my wife were just not going to get along Yeah, I came to I was getting to five hours a week and every other sunday

That's no She even came to me and said I want you to change her name because people don't like spanish people and there's neck of the woods Do you know, I mean it was fucking brutal. It was brutal. I dealt with it, but But today how I pacify myself is saying that I I gave a life to get a life You know I'm saying I lost a daughter To become a comedian, but hold on That she's still alive. She's still alive and that she will not talk to me. We don't know yet though. No, I've reached out It doesn't I listen. I just want I know but

Let me just be the voice of reason here. Okay Okay, did you just laugh? No, it will be side. Oh, I thought that was chore. Here's yeah, because I wasn't you were about to die I love you though, but um Here's the voice I I'm being real right now and um, you know, I'm a liar I'm a deceiver and I I do shadow play sometimes but every once in a while there's truisms when I say things There's truisms and I'm very real And you're gonna have a real moment right now. Okay honest to god

Out of all the comics I've met especially in our class of guys because you're in the same classes I know I know I look young and people think that I'm in my 20s still But um, we're in the same class. Okay You you you're probably one of the best souls I've met. I mean you and I I've always just you're an honest guy. You're you're a hard worker and um, you're a nice guy And it's a shame that there's your daughter's out there and she doesn't get to know The great joey Diaz. I think you're a great guy and I think it's a loss for her

You know, I think I would really wish that she reached out to you And and develop the relationship because you're a great guy Also, I know this for a fact too is is that because I've asked around Is joey Diaz a good father to his five-year-old daughter. Yeah, you guys go to the park I talked to her the other day when I called you remember you can go talk to um say hi to um Your uncle bobby and she can hi She said hi uncle bobby, right? This guy's legit, dude

I gotta say and it really hurts my feelings that she that happened. I got a second chance. Okay. Do you know what that's like in life? Yeah, I've had third chances. Yeah, I mean to have a second chance. I got to have a kid at 50 That's incredible So whoever's controlling the cards buddha Jesus, I don't call say Jesus. Thank you. Whatever the fuck is controlling the cards the big picture Yeah, replace that gap in my life. Yeah for right now. I'm cool When I go to Denver and perform, I do not get in the car and go to boulder Because I know me

You know, you still haven't asked me why I didn't go to the memorial. It's you sure Why did I know me? Because I know me Well, wait, I know I don't know but we need I need to ask a couple more questions. Okay You were not at the memorial at mitzi shores. No, you were in town. Yes. Yeah. Why didn't you go? Because I knew what mitzi wanted Mitzi wanted me to go down there and smack through motherfuckers That's true. Okay. I get what you're saying mitzi like controversy

Yeah, mitzi loved all that shit. Yeah, and guess what what? I'm bad at funerals Remember Marilyn Martinez when I went off on Jeff Valdez. Oh, yeah Oh, yeah My mother's funeral. There was a fistfight the first night And when I was a kid a kid died the eighth grade and there was a huge brawl at the funeral So I don't do well at funerals because I'm the type of guy that'll go. Hey, man. Can I talk to you for a second? Didn't you fucking torture barbie lee when he's alive get the fuck out of here before I stab you in the neck

I play security guard at funerals I can't do that. Yeah. Yeah. That's how I was raised. That's right. That's how I was raised The way you were raised. That's how I was raised. That was another name. Marilyn Martinez Marilyn Martinez was another one. Yeah, we were all partners in crime. It's weird. Remember who we've seen. Her boyfriend David Yes, Dave. Oh, please. You know what he peels I got that gave that guy. Oh my god Me too one that I called him at three in the morning. He came over just for two pills. Yeah He's like, oh, you're giving me his two pills. Yeah. I'm like, that's all I got. One time he cried I'm dying

Give me the pills. I'm dying Because they they lived in silver like as well. Yes, right. I live in silver like I drive over. I'm drugged out, right? And I give give this guy fucking drugs. Oh my god Poor david and they ended up dying of cancer. He died. Yeah Two people died in the spot because I didn't even know they died a couple years after Marilyn. He went down His sister used to call me from time to time and say, thank you. Oh my god. So David and Marilyn died They're in heaven or wherever Marilyn died first and David died august Maybe two years later. Marilyn Martinez every and people don't probably know who she is but um

She was a part of our class as well. Yes, and she was this older latino lady And she was just think of a hispanic rosanne type of a girl loud funny A pure heart. She got me in. You know, she's the one that said wait till men cc. He's Yeah, yeah, I submit her at the lab factory latino night on monday nights when it was the hottest night that Tuesday night And monday night before it was no better mondays. It was something else. Those were the hottest nights in town

They were yeah, what was the black night on tuesday night tuesday show tory No, what was freaky month freaky monday was at the improv freaky monday was the improbable tuesday tuesday was um Um, I forgot what it was called man tory and all those guys. Yeah, I saw richard prior there one night not on stage I saw cedric. They're the very first. I never heard of cedric the entertainer I lose i saw him on tuesday nights in the main room. My brother and i steve was with me And paulie goes did watch this black guy. He's pretty funny I had never seen cedric

I was sitting there like and i'm going he comes on i remember steve and i were on her knees Because we were laughing so fucking hard Like we couldn't breathe I think you know he he was a big guy cedric. He's a big guy, but he was physical It was just something about his like physicality and how we used the space that was so fucking funny But um, yeah, man Asian nights never really took off

Yeah She's taken off. Yeah killing the game. I just saw the beginning of the special and she says there's a rumor going around That every asian in town is here tonight or whatever. So yeah, let me ask you about netflix now You have a half hour. Yes, you did it already? No, no june 4th june 4th Should i shouldn't they have given you an hour? Let me tell you something. No, let me tell you something. Let me tell you something. Okay, and you don't have to speak i'll speak Okay, and i i'm on love. I mean, i you know, i don't know netflix at all I would love to be in business with them one day. It's a great company, but

Let me just say this is is that I know that you showcased a couple of times for them And then I had heard through and this could be wrong that They weren't really going to give you a special and then they gave you a half hour and I just wanted to say this is that Regardless of that you're a fucking monster You are a genuine Monster of a comedian. I've seen you. You're one of those guys

That if I have to follow you, I literally would be scared. I would do it and I'll be able to handle myself You know me because I'm professional, you know, I mean, but let me tell you this It would be like, all right, how are you gonna open like and I would have to Strategize it. All right. I'm gonna not tell a joke in the first 45 seconds, right? I'm gonna just can't get try to get the audience. You know, I mean, I would have to think it through Sometimes when you're mostly when I if they're followed somebody at the comedy store I don't think about it. I just go up and just do it, you know But this guy is a genuine beast and to me

It's a given, right? But you know But congratulations on the 30 minutes. Listen, Bobby. Okay. I went to jail for the second that you burglared. I know Did you ever see Molly's game? Mm-hmm. Just saying Molly's game when The father talks to the daughter and he goes I did a couple things, right? Like that's all you do in your life. We do a couple of things, right? Everything else we do is fucking wrong. Think about it. How long we become fuck ups for How long were we fuck ups for before we did and but think of the

What made us go to the comedy store? What made us showcase for mitzvi? What made us go to the improv that tuesday and bud freeman was gonna be there? We made some good choices I'm lucky just to be here If netflix said no, do you think I would go home and cry? I wouldn't give a frenchman's fuck I know but at 55 Just a fact. No, no, no, no that i'm selling tickets that i'm still at the comedy store

No, no, no that I have a daughter that I don't do drugs anymore. Yes. Yes. I still smoke reefer I love my reefer do what you got a fucking xanax. I'll pop that motherfucker with an edible tame the tiger Watch your heart. But yeah, you can sometimes eat an edible. You get anxiety. I get anxiety. Well, you don't fucking xanax You won't get anxiety. I'm very happy. You found say I'm grateful. I'm grateful. I'm grateful. I'm gonna just say this. Can I just say this? Say it? All right um, no That's flat out fucking no because I'm gonna tell you this right now. Okay It's like this. It's like, um, you know, I don't know these kids that get these things. That's fine

I'm happy for everyone that gets it. Okay, but there are just certain people, right? That is just a given all right, you did 25 years of time into this thing All right, and you were always in it. You were never like some of these guys. Yeah, I I went away for 10 years and I came back You know, this this guy was like me. We were in the pocket when I always see you Why because it's not because I mean, I like seeing you but it's because you and I have never quit We never quit. Yeah. We're always just oh, there he is. He's just a part of

My reality because him and our both guys that refuse to leave the game. I know where to go We're like richard gear. No, I have a place to go dude. I know where to go. I can go to mountaintops I can go to beat cities. I can go all over the world if you would have had somewhere to go You would have gone already. No, but who puts up with this fucking abuse Who puts up with this people choosing us Netflix not giving you a special, but you're following Paul Mooney for a year. Who the fuck are they to decide? That's why we're so lucky. You and I have arrived that no other comic ads You won me over. Are you ready for this? Yeah, you know what you and I are what?

All right, you have the air force You have the army. You have the fucking marine navy seal. You have my navy seal. We are the navy seals Oh, I want to hear it when shit gets danger danger shit gets danger. Who do they drop out of the hell? Us the navy seal us We're real mitzi shaw hand picked Our status never ever happened again So who the fuck is anybody?

To judge me. Is there a picture of me an improv? Not really There's not a picture. You don't see me on any shows getting interviewed by Conan. You know, whatever Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've come to that agreement. That's another thing. That's interesting. Yeah, I've come to that I go I go to Facebook right or my Instagram whatever social media And I'll scroll through like, you know these younger guys on Conan and all these jimmy kimmel all these things Now go imagine that's great. And then it always in my back of my head is like I've never even been invited Yeah, I'll never go I'm on a show now, right

A network show they have that up front every year Two year two up front. They've had so far right to yeah Do they invite Bobby? No, they have never been there. What and all they talk about is diversity and yeah I mean, I'm on the show, which is great. That's good. And that was great. But you know, it's like just for laughs Never been no me either Oh Now they know yeah, but they you've never been to latin montreal never never even they said they didn't like the twitch I did with my hand one year

That's an actual note That was one year bruce hill. Well, I remember one year He came out to see me like six times And then the last time was just like, this is just no way and I remember my manager abby. I'm still with her She's like, yeah, sweetie. I'm sorry to no go again this year. I just remember going How many years have you been with abby for? 20 plus And who's left with abby? No one else

Loyal just you I've been with matt blake for as long as the same thing. I don't leave my people That's a man. Yeah, you have to you have to i'm loyal. I'm loyal also. That's it. Yeah. Yeah. I see people switching camps I don't like it. I don't like it either. Fuck Okay, right. Okay, sponsor. Well, what time just spot 10 45? Okay, we got a couple more minutes a couple more minutes, okay And so all right. So joey, you got a half hour. Also, can I just say this? I Here's another thing. This is that You and I are similar in this way also is that we get like three or four lines in a movie

You know, like I remember like I watched that movie taxi Not taxi driver, but the jimmy fallon queen. Let's see. Yeah, right. You're in that movie. Yeah, right And I remember going watching the movie going The only thing I remember is joey Diaz being in it. He's so funny or spider-man. Yeah, you remember spider-man Yeah, the first one. Yeah, the second one. The second one. I mean, you're in that 14 days one line Those are the good old days over time. Yeah, drinking pomegranate juice smoking dope in my green room Yeah, oh, yeah two weeks one line joey, you're too big to be hanging out in the train Yeah, go to the green room when I booked it. It was one day

Yeah, and then they call me in june. They go call the wardrobe when I went to wardrobe. They're like you start working next week I'm like, what are you talking about? I got July 31st. I'm like, nah Those are the good old days. They don't know they let you sit for two days Or you're like in your trailer and you fall asleep for like seven or eight eight hours And you open your eyes. You don't know where you are and then you get a knock and then some nerd. We're not gonna use you You're like, wow, it's great That was fucking great. Yeah, lobster tails on friday and spider-man too. Yeah, wow Friday and white people still be eating salads and apple pie I'm eating lobster tails to go. I got 19 lobster tails. I'm shoving lobster tail in every pocket

Have you ever done a movie where they didn't even you weren't even in it at all? We're like they cut it out. I think I just did that. I did that movie About Howard Hughes and I put a gangster But I was in my trailer when they called and the two gangsters sat in the boot So I sat across from Ali Baldwin And I think they cut it out because nobody said nothing to me that they saw me I got a check. It's so funny how I get residual checks from movies. I'm not even in yeah Like I get checks for some reason but then I get my checks too and I cash them all the same

I did that movie paul and I'm in the director's cut or whatever but in the original cut I remember like, you know leaving the driving away from that scene and going wow, that was really good I made everyone laugh. You know what I mean? And you get really pumped up and you tell people about it I mean that new cyber-peg movie right and it comes out and they go like you weren't in it And you're like oh fuck my bad. When you text me your address the other day. Yeah, I'm not gonna repeat it I go I know the street I just don't know where it is. I mean I looked it up. I go this is my old cook deal history He used to stay open till two

So I read business hours He had business hours from 11 to 2 11 8 p.m. To 2 it's three hours 11 a.m. Oh, wow that's long hours. He would get drunk from 4 to 7 So you couldn't call him. He'd never self go from 4 to 7 But it's tip top hour and then he then he shortened my curfew till 1 If you don't have no cash, it's one if you got cash, it's two if you're front and you got to a one I would leave La Jolla comedy store At a quarter to 12. Yeah, and I would get right here by one

I could do La Jolla in an hour and 15 an hour 20 I do 90 Or 80 all the way to the border. Yeah, but they asked you to stop for fruit and from there to Irvine I'd do a hundred a hundred a hundred no registration no insurance barely break pads That brings up a story. I remember one time I was in my hotel a hotel room in San Diego like by Tijuana

And it was like 2 p.m. I was sleeping in this hotel room And I get a call and they go Why are you at are you at the table read and I was so drugged out Right because I had just gotten pills from Tijuana I'm like, I have a table read How fucking embarrassing is that? I'm so drugged out. I can't even make it to a fucking network table read for a show So I did a movie. I booked a movie called pizza and bullets

Sounds great. It was horrible. Yeah, it was horrible and they had the girl from the godfather But I went and shot the first scene and I'm like, I'm not going back I'm not going back And the next day I had a 6 a.m. Call and I got coked up to the gills And they came knocking on my daughter and I grabbed the kid threw him and shit And they called the cops. It was hysterical. Don't you want to be in this movie? I'm like, I never want to be in your fucking movie again The casting director called me and said he'd never booked me again. He was gonna call everybody

Fuck pizza and bullets and tell them that I was a fucking piece of shit Yeah, and they direct the call me and I yelled at him and now the director is trying to be my friend on linkedin Fuck him Fuck him. I don't even have linkedin. But I saw his name. I'm like, look at this fucking creepy dude I know you got to go but I'm gonna ask one last one more one more question. Okay, because you have to go but um So when you you left the store, where'd you go for those three or four years seven years seven years I uh Did the pray improv the second week. Yeah, but what would you go up at nights in la anywhere? Improv

You're sorely rogan sorely missed I had to do that You have to do that once in a while. Yeah, if you if you start in ohio If you start at columbus ohio and the guy likes you You're gonna emcee for two years Then you're gonna feature for about four years and then one day he's gonna let you headline Thanksgiving New year's day off night. Yeah, and then eventually you're gonna get a weekend

And then that guy's gonna come to you and go at about the seven-year mark Eight-year mark. He's gonna look at you and go you got a shit or get off the pot You either gonna stay here and be a fucking a mook comic Or you go to la I can't do nothing else with you. I had been at the store from 97 from February 97 To Whenever the fuck I disappeared. Yeah 2006

Seven I saw the writing on the wall. Yeah, I saw it. It was time for me to leave. Yeah I take signs from the universe. Okay. Okay. There's people that don't see it. Sometimes you're not supposed to be somewhere I got surgery. I had a fat ball in my neck That would get really swollen. I breathe That's where the guys are. Look at them and they had a break. No, they had a basketball factory right here They had a break my fucking collarbone. Oh, he did to take the fat ball out and when they took it out The fuck is a fat ball like a a ball of fat with no cancer Oh, and the doctor came to me and he goes, do you want to see it? I'll never forget this

I'm like, yeah, I want to see it and he brought it in the jar when I looked at it I go that's the evil from the comedy store Like, you know when you book a movie and you somebody comes up and he says congratulations, Bobby You were great and you walk away Don't look at the other guy go fuck that motherfucking piece of shit So all that shit that happens I felt it It was at a time when there was weird people there that didn't like Rogan was doing 45 minutes on Friday

Yeah, they didn't like they didn't understand that he bought a sound system that dice had bought a sound system They didn't understand and I just thought it was time to move on But I just wanted to say welcome back Yes, okay. It's really good to see you back. It's good to see Joe Rogan. Hold on. Let me tell you something else Okay, let me tell you why I went back. Why just so you know, I work on science I got the call from Adam on a Friday That that fuckers do not Tommy wasn't there no more and he was taking over the store what I consider coming back And I said, I'll call you next week. Let me think about it

And I had a colonoscopy That's when they stick a camera in your ass And that night I stayed up drinking that fucking shit to shit go lightly and you drink it and the movie was on that movie with Peter Sellers being there That was Marilyn Martinez's favorite That's my favorite movie and I watched that movie and I said that's a sign from Marilyn to go back to the store There you go, motherfucker. You wanted that don't leave yet I

Was gonna make me cry. Yes. No, that's a true story. Oh my god. That was God That was God that was malin malin was the one in her deathbed That in the middle of a rant in the middle of a rant about jesus and that if she Got beat the cancer. She was wasn't gonna work dirty again in the middle of a rant She stopped and looked at me and she goes joey. You gotta stop doing coke and I probably stopped Three weeks later. I went for an interview for a movie And they told me we really want you for this movie, but we understand you have a drug problem. We don't have a big budget

I was so embarrassed that somebody else knew about my little secret That i'm like, I can't do this no more and I was about 44 And I read somewhere that John Gotti had taken over the gambino crime family when he was 45 So I said I got to do something when i'm 45 And i've been clean from coke for 10 years amazing There you have it If Gotti could take over the gambino's in 45, I had to do some of my life for 45

No, we do no, we do this thing at the end where we do um god joey You get so emotional. You got it so emotional. Yeah, bro. We're talking. This is home to heart here. This ain't no fucking oaky dog podcast I don't do podcast I know that I know that i'm real too. I know that's why i'm saying i don't call me oaky I love you. I love you too. No, we do this thing called unhelpful advice. We'll do it really quickly We have an email and then we give suggestions and then we'll end it. Okay, go ahead Unhelpful advice with barbie kalala and joey coco Diaz

My father-in-law equals amazing loving supportive and love seeing him always his y slash mother-in-law equals attic booze pills cigarettes cigarettes and weed for years We've uh bit our tongues and tried to include my husband's mother in our exciting life milestones His dad's always there and supportive, but his mother in her condition has added nothing But stress and frustration to our lives events and holidays We're now expecting our first child and I do want I do not want her at the hospital or even around the first couple of weeks Until I am comfortable with the new motherhood And if she is sober she makes me anxious and is a mess

I don't want our exciting next chapter to have a horrible memory of her actions like our wedding did We do love and want my husband's father around whenever he wants to be he's amazing But they come as a pair quite often. How do we approach the newborn time? I would hate to rob my father-in-law of his first moments as a grandfather because of her actions. What did we do out? Mimi weed her out together That's a tricky one. That's not a tricky one. You go. Hey dad. You come mom. You're out No, um father-in-law's cool mother-in-law is bad shit crazy they want to

Bring dad and father-in-law for all family festivities, but not mom-in-law, but they come as a duo They don't come as a duo. Well, it I understand that but the thing is is that when people think that they come in pairs It's like if I was in my drug addiction Right, I was using and claud didn't leave and she was still she would leave but She would definitely leave but if she didn't leave, right and then I you were invited to a wedding and I wasn't I'm well aware of I'm like, yeah, that's why because I'm a fucking fuck up Yeah, I would I would set boundaries and be clear about how you feel about her

That's just says that's the only solution to this. Well, that was a great episode Let's get the fuck out of here. That was great. All right. All right. Um, we let's take a photo and uh, give joey Diaz a round of applause Everybody join any dates for everyone to look out for nothing. I'm too special when I'm taking time off I got kalusa casino june 17th I got vegas July 14th, and I got fucking utah the last week of july. That's it. There you go guys Thank you guys for having me on the podcast. Uh, we'll be right. Oh We'll be right back guys, uh with some housekeeping

And we are back. Wow joey He's so emotional got me got me tear yeah for a second He reminds me so much of like his life trajectory. He reminds me so much of my dad Because you know, my dad had two daughters Um before like from his first marriage And you know, my dad had a really you know, he had done some fucked up things later on his life But then he had a second chance and then he had us and he was the greatest dad ever Scary but great

Um any shows for bobby come on bobby will be at um in seattle At parlor live in bell view June 7th through 9th. I believe in the following weekend after that punch line san francisco He can go to bobby live live.com for all his dates after that. I also wanted to make another announcement Something uh on your lap. Yeah, so um, I've actually been fostering and bottle feeding This four week old puppy as I mentioned last week. Yeah um Don't grow on the mic

Hi, hi So I've been fostering this guy hashtag puppy fritter for mayday rescue So if you're interested in having a new member in your family go visit um at mayday rescue. That's m a e d a y on instagram and fill out an application for this guy I I don't get to choose or decide where he goes after um, I wean him off the bottles but you can turn in an application and Hopefully you get to meet puppy fritter puppy fritter is gonna end up in this home. So no, he's not Don't fill out those applications. No, this isn't going to be a foster fail

I love him, but I want to continue to keep I'm looking at your face right now and hit that like come on Calyla, I love you. I love you so much I love you anytime calyla fosters. She just keeps it. I love you Uh, george, uh, what is the youtube uh channels? We have two don't we sir? Uh, we now have a tiger belly clips channel. So go there for uh, all your highlights needs Very cool. What are highlights? Give me an example of a highlight. What are highlights formal code tigerbelly.com highlights Just like clips of previous episodes that like we like or are like

Yeah, just the best parts of the the old episodes. It's fun to walk to the old stuff. They were we were different back then I was I was really just nervous. I still am but really just like My jaws were always really tight like and your face was more matte I think you said man. I was like, no, it's more man now mad matete I'm like, come on guys. My skin's going through some shiny. I'm just kidding because calyla every day It's like am I shiny? I'm like you are not shiny. You're fine. No, I think they changed a formulation of my favorite BB cream And now it's like super oily And I want to write a letter to my congressman about it. That's all I'm saying

So youtube.com slash tiger belly clips and also a quick merch update Uh, we are getting samples of our merch soon So you'll see us wearing that in a in a few couple of weeks And then merch should come out pretty soon. So be on the lookout for that anything else Um, no, I think that's it I meant to do a shout out shout out or reverse shout out. No, no real shout out. I don't do reverse ones anymore I'm trying to try to keep it positive Also, I wanted to thank everyone for giving me recommendations for my um tmj pain. Oh, yeah

So I took all their suggestions I went to go see a dentist and then I went to go see another crappy dentist And then I started massaging my face And then uh, I think I'm just gonna live with this pain for the rest of my life Yeah, yeah, I think that I probably need to get a mouth guard, but that I'm probably gonna have intermittent pain for the rest of my life. I can't wear headphones anymore Oh, is that why you don't put them on? It hurts me so badly as a matter of fact after I did Tom Segura and Christina's podcast your mom's house

That I was suffering for five days after that because I didn't want to you know, I wanted To put the headphones on because I didn't want to be like, I don't want to hear the headphones, you know Um, so yeah, I wasn't so much pain afterwards. So no more headphones for me Oh, don't get sponsors that are head, but if there was a sponsor that was like, you know Headphone company beats if you want to send us some headphones my jaws. I was lying about my job will be fine Yeah, yeah, I can suck dick again Uh, george, uh, or clalo we can follow you on all social media at calamity k and george We can follow you on instagram george underscore kimmel and all for your

bobby lee need you can go to bobby lee live.com and if you would like to You know just support us just make sure you follow us on instagram at tiger belly twitter at the tiger belly and email us any questions or unhelpful advice at the tiger belly at gmail.com Have a good day Hey Prime members, you can listen to tiger belly ad free on amazon music download the amazon music app today Or you can listen ad free with wondery plus in apple podcast before you go Tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at wondery.com slash survey