TigerBelly - Episode 153: Theo Von & The Frisbee

Episode Date: August 1, 2018

Theo plays chess. Bobo has a kazoo. Khaloko is a plant. Gilbo is on a boat. We talk Inner Light, the dark arts, vagerries, island mahogany, and the top 300 million Christians in the world.Support us by supporting our sponsors!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey Prime members, you can listen to Tiger Belly add free on Amazon music download the app today Thank you, how do you do a lot? You run out of shit to talk about or what well podcast. Yeah, I mean, I I don't know I'm blanking today, dude Are you really? Yeah. Well, let's talk about Stevie We'll talk about whatever I want to talk about. You know, man. We just said you had nothing No, I know but I just want to see what happens when I just want to see what happens when this Hope be the aggressive person with nothing I just want to see what happens when this thing turns on. Yeah, I have been opening though

I'm gonna open a certain way. Okay Damn, huh? I remember him from all the cruise ships He's like the guy that's trying to fuck everybody on the cruise ships, you know He's like the fucking Leos and school teacher Yeah, you do look like Face you look like somebody you'd find in the woods if you weren't looking way deep in the woods like in Polynesia Yeah, you but you'd be running the sweatshop to there's no one else working. Yeah, yeah, you run the sweatshop, but nothing's being made Yeah, there's like there's like sewing machines and things. Yeah machinery pushing buttons. No, no, there's no fabric

There's no no, there's no fabric. Oh guy. Yeah, you know what sweet you have some really thick legs. Thank you He does thank you. Let's start female thick Where's George like that George? We're starting George Yeah, like that young kind of high school Wow, no hair at the top of your legs, you know Oh, you should get that cut off, huh? What is that? It's a fupa. Oh, you got to get that cut off or donated, huh? I got that. I got that too. You do. Yeah, go ahead five four three two one Base the final frontier. These are the voyages of the Starship Enterprise. It's continuing mission to

What are you wearing? Huh? Welcome to another episode of Tiger Belly Welcome, oh man, we got fucking footloose in the audience But what we got here is a Tiger Belly episode with me Blankie What was your name Blankie like a my name is Blankie and we got uh flat You got flats right there. We got Kendall gender. What Kendall's Kendall Jenner. We got We got how's that not a Halloween costume Kendall gender. Yeah, right

Just the whole family don't even talk until I fucking introduce you. What do you think Tom Cruise for a fucking strictly business? Oh, yeah, I'm Stevie. Yeah, you're strictly do No, don't do that. Yeah, don't do that. Yeah, you know, don't do my brother right now We got this dude right here. Bob's a wild card Oh me and Bob We got George we got my girl right here. How long have we been brother? Oh Yeah

And we got um, we got a lot of we got the king rat right here, man. We got country Country times USA right we got fucking the white and lemur hunter baby. Yeah White Knights low thunder Thunder bro, I'm after that cage You know what I'm saying America's free. We got dickless free here, man. Yeah, we got fucking Gauge eyes gouge. We got gouge eyes here, man. We got you're lucky. Oh Vaughn. Everybody clap your hands Nothing aka nothing. Oh, whatever dude. I see you got your boy right here. Yeah Talk about my boy right here, man. The DJ from every cruise ship

Oh, you think you were in a cruise ship you get laid or no? Yeah, for sure. I don't know the cruise director always gets laid No, yeah, no, oh 69 in my room You ever play for cruise ship as a stand-up. No, dude, I would never do that Yeah, I've never been offered but even if they offered I'd say no are there Canadians that accept that. Oh, yeah a lot of comics do cruise ships out of like desperation or they really want to be on a cruise Desperate man. You think yeah, man. I think some people like to be on cruises. Some people like Buffets, I mean, I have a friend that goes

Oh, really he never even goes outside and looks at the water or anything He just stays in the boat and just goes to the buffet. I was 20 for our buffet. I love buffets I love when they have a honeycomb. Really? Yeah, they're not regular honey. They have honeycomb Oh, honeycomb is the best of that. What do you mean? Where is that? Yeah, why? Honey comes from bro, I know where honey comes from trees, brother I'm not talking about no sad. I'm talking about honeycomb Sorry Where from the south that's what I got caught up I got caught up in that set scandal

That hit a lot of the southern us, bro When when Theo doesn't know what he's talking about. He closes his eyes Yeah Don't know where you know where you know who makes honey though, right? Yeah bees man If there we go, then that's you know, that's we're halfway there and other animals There's something else that makes honey. What kind of but there's another insect that they're starting to get honey out of what is it? I'm not sure. I don't know, but let me look at bears. No. No Bears are taking out of pots. Yeah

They make it too. How do you know they don't make it? But sap isn't that bad on a biscuit if you put sugar with it, you know That's the only thing sap is like it's kind of like honey, but it's it's definitely a lot more tart You know, and you could barely chew. You want to know about tart sap? I got some right here. I'm on my body right now Right your fucking eyes, bro. I can't even imagine the petri dish that surrounds your fucking bowl bag I'm asking something right now. Yeah, and this is a real question. Do If um If like people in this country had a disease, right? And they're all what's my favorite disease

No, the only and the only way to cure it is if you suck my dick. Would you suck my dick? I'm talking about billions of people bro billions people. What what do you mean? What we said like Basically, you said would you suck my dick? It's a people I was like, what does he mean watching? I'm just saying though There was some sort of design some disease in the country, right? Do you really have a dick? I bet you have like a kazoo Yeah, makes no would you would you suck it though to save millions of people's lives or what? I mean

Here's what I would do. I wouldn't suck it. Yeah, but if uh someone else sucked it, you know And it was late late at night. I might smell the breath really fast Oh, you would do that. Yeah, I would hope that I wouldn't cure the disease. That would cure probably 100 people Maybe yeah, but as long as I'm one of those hundred then that's fine with me We'll ask you to ask the reverse. Would I suck your dick for a fucking four billions? Yeah What do you think ask me would you suck my dick for a little for for 70 80 bucks? What? That's it 70 80 bucks save the world. Well, you're not gonna be just give me 80. Can you just give me 80? Yeah, wow. Yeah round it out to 100. What about for a cheat code on uh on that bejeweled game you play or whatever?

Oh That's time. What about for mystery levels? Would you suck dick for mystery? What's that game called whatever man That game your car runs on what is it? It's like bejeweled or something. Yeah. Yeah, man. So yeah, I guess I would then okay. Yeah. Why are you so aggressive, dude? Well right now you're so like bet. Yeah, you're like what up? You're like beijing you're like back of the Oh Fupa alert

Look like a sick animal you like fat meals or what? So weird I'm gonna say this but that looks a lot more. Is that shaved? Yeah, I shave. I know I've been shaving it as of late Yeah, because usually it's a bush. Yeah, look. Oh, wow. That is crazy. It looks like it needs to be drained Dr. Pippa popper Yeah, I you know, I have a leaky I have leaky things in my body. I could see that. Yeah You know when I was on the show, I would I did Portland Friday night And the second show um work club at the uh helium. How was it? It's okay Fun and I was on stage and then I I I was doing a bit and all of a sudden

I just shit my pants. Oh, yeah Have your your pants on stage? No, I've shit my pants like in a couple of different places But I've never shit my pants on stage, but you and I had I stopped the show Yeah, oh, I went good night and I went back backstage and then here's the crazy part No, it was the first show Friday night because then I took my pants down And there was a load of shit in my pants. Oh No, you don't have leaky shit. Oh my yeah, and then what happened was um, who cares what happened after that? I was saying this is already disgusting

And it's already like here's the thing I know I'm gonna just guy can I just finish my story guy? Yeah, you can all right, um Um, so I go I go to the manager. I go the manager like they manage your fucking asshole, dude No, I go grow up. Can you go get go to the store and get me a modium ad What right because you had a second show for a second show modium ad from what the periodic table No, I'm only a present. No, that's not an element bro. Yeah, it is. No, I look at the modium ad Where does honey come from? Yeah, honey come from trees come from the woods. Yeah, yeah Yeah, but uh, he um wouldn't do it. Yeah. Oh, give me a modium. He's a fucking adult, dude

No, no, how am I gonna do the second show if I have diarrhea? I don't care wrap your body in something Dude and get out there shit boy. You know paddle the fucking riddles shit boy. I gotta get me underwear He had to get me all that stuff. Oh, oh, yeah, it was a disaster Friday night. Hmm. You never sit your pants, man Let me think about what happened to me one time. Oh, I remember one time I got stuck in a tunnel my car broke down in a tunnel in uh Pittsburgh and I had to defecate Extremely and that's French actually for shit. Yeah. Yeah, and I had to defecate and uh So I got in my back seat of my car and the only like I didn't have any choice This was like, you know, it was like something got into my body like a pink. I had gotten into my stomach

And uh, and all the shit in my body was coming out of my body. Yeah, it was in your stomach Yeah, it was like hey, we need all this shit out of here. I gingivitis once in my stomach. Yeah, you really? Yeah And I got diarrhea from that too. Yeah, really? Yeah. I know how it got down there And I had to defecate into a frisbee out of upside down frisbee was all I had Really? He real. Yeah. Yeah. What? And so I'm in this tunnel. There were cars whizzing by here's the crazy thing Yeah, extremely hard to poop when cars are going by at 50 60 70 miles an hour and furious too Yeah, furious like and also white people like it was Pittsburgh. So it's furious white people driving by I can

If other people are some certain ethnicities, I can shit easier when they're driving by honestly You know, like if a couple of brothers are rolling by blasting some fucking good music I can fucking blow ass all day into a frisbee No problem. I'm part of you know, everything is everybody's you know, everybody seems like it's more laid back Yeah, yeah, but an angry white dudes, you know rolling by, you know, six seven eight They would probably call somebody too, huh? Oh, they weren't calling anybody. I mean the only free finger They had they were waving it out the window Yeah, they weren't using it to dial the phone

So you shit on a frisbee out of shit in the open the down now the you know at the top part but the bottom part A frisbee is basically a cup basically the size Oh a plate. It's a plate a plate. Well a plate is just a cup That's way Are you a place is a wide wide wide cup? No, no, no, no. Are you pulled over? Well, I'll pull it. Yeah, I'll pull over the car. I think honestly run out of gas. You just shit on the ground Why did you have to like I was in a tunnel. Yeah, so it's dark. Shit. What's that shit in a tunnel you idiot? Okay, you should be familiar with tunnels, dude. Why? Huh?

Because you're gonna do that shit again right now, man. What's shit, bro? Why are you why you oh, no, no, dude Whoa, you're doing that nom shit again. Ah, bro. What nom what you thought that I was digging tunnels in the Ho Chi Minh trail and trying to attack you people No, I think that was me the fruit juice the pomegranate fruit juice. That's always in there Palm yeah, no No, not palm. No, bro. I don't believe in vietnam. I don't believe it and it happened. Huh? I'm gonna say it didn't happen, dude Are you those uh, they never found the boats, dude. Oh, right. It's just like slavery. They never found the boats What do you mean tunnels though, bro? So anyway, I'm in a tunnel. I'm in a tunnel and there's only two lanes going each way

There's no there's nowhere to get out on the tunnel like in a tunnel, you know, right cars are whizzing by And so I had to get in the back seat and defecate into this frisbee right and um And then wait for the cops to come why do you call the cops come how do they call the cops? I had somebody I well somebody not somebody I had just shit in the frisbee in my car and I Needed help. Yeah, there's a lot of things I didn't learn From that story I'll tell you what I didn't learn. Okay. Say something. I didn't learn that um,

Fris a cup a cup and a plate are the same fucking thing. They're not the same thing depends on you ask depends on who where you are How strong the gravity is in an area how fresh the cup how recently you made it how hot how warm is the clay? The fucking cup is just a plate is just a wide wide cup Sides can't get along That's all it is. No, that's the truth, dude Wow Go beat a plate apart with a hammer and then tape it together and don't do a good job

You got a bowl would be the same as a as a plate go beat a cup apart. I'm sorry with the hammer That's true. You flatten it out. Maybe there there's a tape it together Right, what do you have? You have a fucking plate there. You got a plate and you fucking won. How does he feel Vaughn? I don't know how you do it. You're crafty, dude, huh? Chink mate, man Would you say chink? I didn't say chink. I said checkmate. I heard Don't set me up for racial

I'm not I'm not but dude Whoa, I would never say that. I just say this though, dude. Yeah a couple of things you did already. Okay. I would never say that Put your fucking tongue through strictly business glasses on. Okay, dude. So this is what I'm saying, dude I just washed my hair today. I know you look great. But what I was saying though is is that you accused me of making tunnels Mm-hmm. You I didn't say that I said you might have heard a check rate. I would never say that, dude Clever pun very clever On your podcast we talked about how you can't tell us a different tell us apart Asians. That's not true I know he's from Laos

I know but if you saw him in the like there was a five other Laos guys Would you go? Oh, that's that dude from tiger bell. Or you'd be like, no, that's five Laos guys I'm like that's the guy from the cruise. First of all It's the same thing everybody does on the shirt Like bro, if you had a tag a namesake that said riko on it, you get fucked all the time So and look man, I'm trying to work with you guys, you know Yeah He's gotten tight with the jk guys

I know dude. Yeah, and there's a lot of them are vietnamese a lot of them are from mexico There's two mexicans there for sure. There's two mexicans. Yeah, who knows what there is. I don't see colors, bro I don't see colored people damn chink made again I never said that Yeah, and you did say it. I don't want to hear it. Yeah, you know what i'm saying Are there any racial slurs? It's porn I didn't say it, bro

Or I would never say I wouldn't say I would not say I would I know you would never say they're bad now that somebody's Are there any slurs that why people get offended by? Oh, dude, I'll tell you what offends me And somebody says redneck that offends me Oh, why because I'm not a redneck and people say it a lot of times and it makes me mad, you know But they probably say it to you in a joking matter, right? I mean, I don't know you're pretty sophisticated for a redneck But if you say something to somebody, you know in a defense, it just I guess it matters how how they take it So if somebody does say it and I'll be like, you know, I don't like I don't like being called that, you know

Right, but rednecks can't be as bad as the n-word or or faggot. Oh, I'm not saying it's Sure, can I say that should be you're not calling it? I'm not calling it a faggot. Yeah, so no, I mean I I don't know man. I think for different, you know, here's the thing different people affecting people differently I mean, here's another thing like I mean people like that were slaves, you know, or that were those people are all gone now You know, those people aren't with us anymore. So the effect that a word is going to have It's not going to be the same on somebody today As it is going to be have been on some that's true. That is very true. That's true. You know, there's no way it can be

Yeah, you know, but yeah, I don't know what it's like to be called certain things certain things don't affect me You know, I'm saying you call me crippled, you know, I'm saying like you're not crippled though I'm not crippled. So I wouldn't that wouldn't have that wouldn't hurt my feelings very much, you know Yeah, you call me, um You know, uh pervo or something or you know, uh, yeah, you know, you do have a pervy vibe about you Yeah, do you really do? I think you do. I think it's kind of cute. But yeah What but I'm also kind of you think your pervy vibe is cute. I think some of it is dude I think is when I get real tired. I can barely see I can barely open my eyes and it kind of

Spooks people out. I'd love to go camping with you one day. Oh way, bro. Why? Hey, dude, you and I camping you and me camping where we're gonna camp right outside of here I can't see you going very far. No, no, no, no, we'll go to colorado Or are you just saying things you see on a map? I can't see you going to color no, I've been to colorado I really did think that you and I could go camping. I would love to camp at some time You and I well, he's from george's. No, he doesn't come. He doesn't come. Um, just you and I We could get some things done

Well, yeah, you do Like I think colliding comes to just make sure that you eat and that I eat Who's gonna do anything you and I got about you and I would starve to death dude in a fucking grocery store I think we could hunt. Are you at doors at all? Huh? Are you outdoors at all? Yeah, I like to be outdoors man. I don't mind being outdoors like I'll go out there and wait for an uber You know, I don't wait inside Right, so Yeah, but you seem like you from the outdoors though. I mean, I know some things

I spent a lot of time outdoors growing up, you know I think here's a weird thing about california. You get kind of immune to some of that in a weird way It's or los angeles. I think the rest of america you you're more in the elements more. Yeah, but when I was in honduras I was in honduras for a month Honduras exactly. Yeah, and carlos mancia took me there Oh, wow, and I was complaining the whole boat ride over there We landed and you have to take a boat there Yeah, because we landed on the major airport then we took another little plane to another like field

Mm-hmm, and then we had to take a four hour like boat ride to his village And during the boat ride. I was complaining the whole time. Wow. Fuck this because I was younger. That's how I sounded All these fucking mosquitoes. Fuck this shit There's no electricity. I'm not gonna make it carlos. I'm not gonna make it That's all screaming that shit. Is that a cow? There's a dead cow in the river. Oh It's not a motherfucking cow. That's your deity you idiot. That's not a fucking right. That's a deity a deity Yeah, and when I got there. I was complaining for three days. I didn't see that. There's no toilet. You can flush nothing Right. You don't know how to just shit shit in the frisbee dude two weeks later. I was walking around naked with a spear

I fucking acclimated The kids were following me around the village kids Right, we were like on logs like balancing ourselves on logs and shit like I became a primitive man I can see that I can adapt really see that I could see I don't know. I don't really can't I really can't see you adapt and actually but I did Yeah, but that was then no, no, what do you mean then dude? You said it was back then. Yeah, but like 20 years ago Yeah, and you're so different now. I know but I think that I have the ability to do it

Do you remember what it feels like to even be hungry at all? Yeah Oh, yeah, I was hungry the other day man. I mean I was hungry in my hotel room in portland and what'd you do? Oh, I try to walk to the red robin and what you fainted. There's a red robin by the house and I try to map quest it It was you know how you when you're walking in map questing. You don't know what Who uses map quest? You go straight to heaven if you walk in map quest at the same time You can go straight to heaven dude. Yeah, and I was going and I was and then all of a sudden I didn't want nine blogs

I was going the opposite direction Right, so I didn't know what to do and I was so hungry. I'd woken up at 4 p.m. There's no food at the hotel He's sort of an old dad in that way like he doesn't have the uber app or the postmates app on his phone It's all on mine. I don't know how to I'm not allowed or something. So like he still prints out directions from map quest. I do Do you know what I mean? Like he doesn't know how to use apps at all. He only knows his games But luckily there was a drive-thru starbucks there

Right, and I got a fucking one of those breakfast sandwiches and I lived so I was hungry then So I know what it's like to be hungry. I know that that certainly is a plight. Yeah Do you think honestly, and I mean you're in love with this man and you see him a lot Do you think he could survive outdoors like? Um, let me pick an element and you tell me how long he could survive in it. All right, okay rain Oh cold or a tropical Oh good question, uh, just so you know, um

let's go, uh Because those are two very Well, look, I'll support thom cruise over here and let's go with uh, let's go with warm Warm hell no I think that's the reason being is that he's really susceptible to mosquitoes and I know what it's like to live in the tropics And anywhere there's a rain puddle is where mosquito lay there lay lay their eggs and you would be Just yeah, they figure a big egg, but in the cold this guy goes to Um, what's that placement Edmonton in flip-flops?

I think he's he has like hide or some type of like walrus blower. He does not Feel any cold at all. I can stick my foot In a puddle of icy water and won't feel a thing. That's just diabetes. That's Not that strength. Yes, it's intercooler. It's intercooler. It's not the sugar foot It ain't no sugar foot dog. You have no idea what you're talking about dude. I'm a survivor in cold elements, dude Dude, no, here's what I'm saying is Warm rain so warm rain. No because of the mosquitoes. I know he cries about like a single mosquito bite You're acting so rudely that I can't even explain myself. This is just the truth

It's not the truth. You have no idea what my elements are. Do you think mosquitoes are hard? Do you think they bite hard? I just said you could You can survive in the cold like I couldn't yeah, I'm a baby in the cold I would die But how long are you saying dude because when I was in Thailand I was out in the fucking jungles No, you were not. I just we just talked about it last week. You fell into a Like a plant terrarium outside of the fucking hotel lot Yeah, no, I I've been out in the forests and stuff. That's true. Yeah

Yeah, I don't like when people accuse me of uh Being weak my bad man, you know, and I think you could survive out there Look, I think you're the kind of person that they would find in a you know in a cave or something They would find you, you know, some a couple of um Soccer players A couple of cub scouts and get lost in the woods, right? Right somewhere in Polynesia or Eurasia Yeah, and they get lost in the woods and or maybe they're like young and they're like, you know Thinking about acting out sexually and they're both kind of experimenting, right?

And they slip off in the woods together two boys and they're taking off each other's scarves and just Fucking just being wild and just you know feeling pressing each other Just medium hard cocks up against each other's merit badges and just learning about each other You know, right just learning about each other just fucking rubbing sticks together out there Yeah, and then one of them falls through like a hole in the ground or something like a magical hole or not even a magical hole just like a weak part of dirt and And then all of a sudden they fall into like a place and you're there Right, and you're sitting in a chair and like he's dead. This guy's been dead

Yeah, yeah, yeah, and uh But do I have words of wisdom when you open your eyes? I open my eyes. Yeah, I say something. Fuck this guy's in dead He looks fucking dead, right? And then you say something, right? I say Tommy's about to say something Yeah, he's about to say something clean air air twice believe increments grams molecules

believe bend over That's what I'd say Yeah, yeah, and then you'd be confused, right? Then I have a snake dick I take shit like a snake. Okay. They hear it first though Like that. It's got the rattle. Is there a snake on the ground? No, no, no. It's my dick. Whoa, right? Mila Kiehl's It keeps you from this thing. Linger, lingers. Linger. Yeah, inkle lead bend over. In increments. So why did he tell you to bend over?

Just do a LeBron James. And then I just turn into ash. Yes. Oh, and I'm gone And let me tell you this right now, right? They will never forget it. I love that. Yeah, right? I was watching a Star Trek and they get married one day too and they have a son named Bobby Lee Yeah, I was watching a Star Trek next generation BE and Jean-Luc Bacardi and some people with the big card Some Bacardi All right, Jean-Luc Bacardi Jean-Luc Bacardi. Dude, he's had some respect for the different ethnicities. He's French and they go through. Um, what do you call it? The

Octagon not the octagon thing. No, I know what it is. Rainforest. They become younger. Yeah, they turn into kids Oh, do they really? Yeah. Well, they still have the same Um, the only they only go back into their kid bodies, but their brains are still the same their life experiences are still there Oh, wow And then what happens is uh O'Brien one of the engineers his wife was in it and she's now a kid But she's inside. She's the same. Here's why it's same person, right? And what happened? She had cancer. No, man He had no cancer man. She's a kid now. Oh, sorry. Yeah, but she's now they're in their room, right? And he feels uncomfortable. So what I'm saying to you is is that and this is a philosophical

Debate debate is is that um if I turn into a kid, I'm 12 years old and I'm like Bobby It's still me, but I'm in my 12 year old body. Yeah. Yeah. Um, but I still have sexual sexuals Could your dick even get I mean, yeah, of course I don't think you can bro. I mean if she's the same girl Can I just show you guys a picture of what I looked like when I was 12? It was not cute. You wouldn't fuck me Do you have a vagina? I Yeah

You know, you know, it's tough. It's like Because here's the thing Like, um, I used to like whenever I would send dick pics to chicks. Yeah, like I would like I would I didn't want to send them Like my current penis, you know In current form not in current form. I wanted to have to start somewhere. It's like if you started the end then you're at the end Right, so I wanted to start at the beginning. So I had a young I happened to have like a bunch of younger pictures of me When I was naked, right? So I would send them like a picture of me at 11 with my fucking dick, right?

And they're like, what the fuck is this? Like this is like a naked boy. I'm like, yeah Nah, that's me. You know, like that's my dick when it was fresh. Yeah. Yeah. This is that, you know So they can see the evolution right but by the third pic most of them don't want to see the evolution anymore They just feel like they feel like dirty people and then they know a lot of them don't even talk to me Oh, so it's weird. This is what she looked like at 12. Oh, come on guy. Oh my god Yeah, no guys. No, no, no, no. I don't support that kind of stuff. Yeah You know what I do is I give a chick dick pics of my dad's Oh, my dad's dick. Oh, really?

To show to show what it's gonna look like My future dick, I like that, right? So and then when they see my actual dick. Yeah, they go. Oh, it's not that bad Yeah, right. It's still fresh. Yeah, right. I like that future future penis that future cock Dude, they um They have a app that can show you what your dick will look like in the future Do they yeah, no, they don't yeah, they do how it's like future dick or something dick More dick in the future. Oh, I know what it is. It's probably like that same aging thing that they do It's like time plus dick or something. Yeah, but

I've seen I've seen a lot of old penises. Yeah. Well, why? Including my dad because I had to like why why to see your dad's dick. Oh, I took care of him when he was dying Yeah, all right nurse. Wow, and I knew that but his dick held up. Yeah, I mean not I'm not saying it didn't go Hold up. It looked okay. Yeah, it didn't look, you know, very decrepit or anything If you watch because I watch some weird porn sometimes Oh, sometimes I know and if you watch old women, you know, if you see old women They've been trying to get into that, you know And the vagina like a nine-year-old woman's vagina

It still relatively looks like a vagina. Yeah some some Some now I've also seen a lot of geriatric vagina. Yeah, what do they look like and um, for jerry's they call them Sometimes when you have to put like a catheter in their urethra it takes a while to find It. Whoa. Wait. Well, you can't find the opening. Well, no because the skin has sort of collapsed on each other a little bit Yeah, yeah, yeah, get into it. You just took off the yeah, get into it. So you got to peel back the layers a little bit Yeah, yeah, I can't hear this. Is it skin? Huh? Is it skin? Who cares if it is? But is it? No, but there's a science talk. It's science talk, man Is is is it's I mean what you can't what you have to open it up and there's things that grew over it

Okay, not you don't get extra skin growing on it. Yeah. Yeah, this skin just loses its elasticity over the years Yeah, you kind of just have to pull back But do you know why? Okay. I'm gonna tell you something right now Here's a science alert. I don't like them. The reason why old women born is not like that is because they're using it But like anything, I'm sure You know a girl that's a virgin at 25. It looks like that too then Now I've also seen older women with very nice vaginas. So I think it's I think they have to use it. No, it's how they use it

If it's if you any any tool that you don't use if you go to an old factory Yeah, you go to you know, Detroit and you go to an old car factory. That's been like Not in use for 20 years Things rust Yeah, I think you know, but you got to oil it up get the engines rolling. You got to grease that thing Resting that thing up. So it's like a little butt polish on that thing. Right. So if you look at like, you know, whoopee goldbergs Vagina, right? If she's using it, I bet it's more goldberg than whoopee these What?

I bet it seems aggravated. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, but I'm sure if she uses it, it looks fine That's all I'm not a scientist. Yeah, but your labia is not a muscle. Yeah, dude. Your labia is not a Muscle you You kook. Yeah, but I know where honey comes from You know, so we both win you both lose Where'd you say honey comes from? What was your answer honey comb the woods Yeah, in the wood but in honey comb. Yeah, right honey comb. Yeah, where does that come from you kook? You come you want to call me kook, huh?

You guys edited that in in there Yes, you did and we have it on fucking factual files, dude. We can go back. Okay. That's not a real thing factual I like that. Yeah actual file. Yeah, I make words up, bro Whoa sayings. No, isn't there a drawing that's supposed to happen right now downstairs in the ship lobby? Can we fucking get him a job? The buffet is closed Ladies and gentlemen, uh, the buffet is closed. Well, we were in hawaii. A lot of people do look like you Like the service people. Yeah, a lot of philippinos work on the cruise ships

You know, it's no even in the hotel. They all just kind of have your like bland look. Well, it's not bland Yeah, why did you call me bland? I didn't at all. I feel like it's kind of an island mahogany I like that right, but if you like worked at a you know, I would see it I could see it like an abc like if you saw me in a hotel, you know working there You'd be like, yeah, that guy's weird. Nobody can imagine you working That's so rude that you even say something like that. Let me say something right now. Okay. Let me I used to work on a farm Did you know that an ant farm? No Oh my lord

He's doing hymns, Bob is doing hymns. Right in a little ant farm. That's cute That's cute man. No, man a real farm man. Oh, yeah, who are you guys growing dude, honey? Corn dude. Oh really? You heard of corn? Yeah. Yeah, I used to work at a farm I used to work at a farmer's market I used to work at a pharmacy. Are you just saying things? I used to work construction. I used to wait tables. I used to do a lot of jobs. Did you really and I was a hard worker Okay, I don't it's only when showbiz got in my vein that haven't really worked one vein I believe that part

Hey one way in one way out a upper lip thin. Yeah Yeah, dude my upper lip is so growing dude and lester so gross lester holt has a very thin upper lip and he's had a good Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, he does have a thin upper there Yeah, but have you noticed that about yourself when you look in the mirror though? Huh? Yeah, but my bottom lip took everything Yeah, you have a good bottom lip. I just have a green bottom lip that's not fully formed Is it that uh that to that tuna? What's tuna called? Naki Naki? Yeah, Japanese. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. What's it called in Japanese? Maki Maki Maki. Yeah, yeah Maki. I was gonna say ma. I got this is shimi. I got that one piece of shimi bottom lip. Yeah

What are some odds that you have a forehead to this very caveman like is it really? He has bangs. How can you even see his forehead? Yeah, I can see it right Bro bangs. Okay They're not bro bangs. That's not what I meant. Yeah, yeah, bro bangs though. Okay. No way dude. BroBangs.com No way dude. Check it out, man. What are some odd jobs you've had? Yeah odd jobs I used to deliver pizza for this Christian pizza. It was a Christian What? What? It was a Christian Christian pizza place Well, they would you just happened to be Christians, but it wasn't you know, it was all Christians

Yeah, but the pizza's not blessed. I mean, it was hollow holy water for the dough. Yeah, they would yeah They would do stuff like that like the water would be blessed, you know Really? Yeah. Wow. It's not crazy. It's not a bad deal. It's not a bad deal. No, you know you get saved and you get a good meal So it's you were you a Christian then working there or did you lie? Oh, I mean, I look I grew up in a Christian bro, bro. No, dude. You're not a Christian dude. I am your activities Yeah, my attests my activities are not Christian like right. Yeah. So here's what I would say. I'd be a bad Christian I'd probably one of the maybe top Maybe

Maybe 200 million Christians What that's ever lived on planet earth or that's alive now. That's alive now. I think I'm one of the top maybe 300 million I'll throw in an extra hunt. I don't think you're 100 million. I would bet I would bet I would bet my life on it that you're not No, yeah, there's don't do that. You're a heathen. No, no No, no, you jerk off. Yeah, Chris. I think you're Christian. Yeah, but you watch as weird because a couple chapters in the bible Where you don't know what god's up to you Oh, yeah, that's true. You know, yeah, he's he's after well, you just don't know I'm saying here's what I'm saying is I could see if I I think I'm one of the top 300 million Christians

Really? Yeah, do you really do you really believe that Jesus Christ died for your sins? I believe that Jesus Christ is a good role model and That's what I think a lot of like Kind of like religious figures are but you don't think that Jesus Christ was the the physical embodiment of god I think he could have been one of them Right. I think I could have been a group. Do you think that there are others? I wouldn't be surprised. Yeah It'd be a lot of pressure put on one person Do you think that he when you know what I'm saying? Do you think when you like hey get down there, buddy?

It's all on you make it happen. Do you think he resurrected after a week or whatever? I could see look if the if he is the fucking son of god, he could definitely bounce back Now it's not it's not risen Dude, and he didn't he snuck out of a cave is basically what happened. Who knows how good the doctors were Who knows if he was even deceased, you know No, right. He could have just a wound. Well, he could you know back then it's infected Well, somebody gets tired. They zone out, you know, like you just don't know if he definitely died I gotta take you guys back to the philippines because every easter

Every easter we have real people who get crucified on a cross. So they get the the thorn crown Beautiful, they get the the they get actually crucified. My uncle was with them. People really yeah people die from that or no Um, no, they bring you down after they don't keep you there for three days Oh, they bring you down. Well, they really put a hole in your hand and they they they put a nail I don't think they do that anymore from but back then they used to yeah I'm gonna get close to the lower boy. You got to walk in his uh In his nails when he did the walk remember when the when jesus did the walk and he had the thorns And then people pelting him with rocks. Yeah, would you be one of those pelting?

Yeah, I always thought that when I watched like movies about it I would never do that passion the Christ. Yeah, I think I would have the rock in my hand But I would have just kind of hung back me and Theo just leaned to get the wall Yeah, you want to throw on it, right? I wouldn't have thrown and I would have probably tried to help him out Yeah, even no matter what his his even if he's like I knew that it was some guy that molested like 50 kids Yeah, I don't know if I can throw a rock at somebody's head at a human Yeah, that's what those you know the the boston marathon bombers the brothers Yeah, one of those sarnav brothers was in the hospital because he lived, right? He was like bravely injured or whatever

The cute one. Yeah, and the nurses had that same. He was cute. He was Yeah, but the the nurses had that same dilemma where they just saw this young boy I mean he had like killed a lot of people and injured a lot of people Yeah, but they still felt like hey, this is just a kid Hurting, you know, you can't you are able to compartmentalize. I think no if I was one of those nurses I'd stick my finger in one of his wounds Oh, I just dug it in there and just hide something in there. I don't think so. I think you're too kind Yeah, you wouldn't do it. Yeah, I'm love, right?

Do you see that? Do you see that I'm love? I don't know what you are sometimes man. I think you're a mysterious figure Do you really do you see you don't you think that I could be I think you're hard to figure out sometimes But do you think that I'm playing for the for the evil side? No, dude But you think but you think I'm the dark arts. Yeah. Yeah No, you don't think I'm a part of the dark art. No, I did not. Yeah, you know, can I say something about you? Yeah, I think you're on my team. What is it the team light team light? Yeah. Yeah We don't we don't do dark arts. You don't no, we don't

We don't yeah. Yeah. Yeah, we don't I could see that. I could see us not doing them. Yeah We You know, you don't in any other time period. Yeah, you and I would have been like Schindler. Really? Yeah We would help people I think I feel like I would have to do a lot of the work and you would have been kind of kind of complaining off to the side But I think you've been so what you're saying is if we were Nazi German you and I are Germans And we want to help some Jews. Yes, and we're trying to smuggle 50 out of a camp That I would carry two and you carry 48

I think I'd be put in charge of more of them. Yeah, that's so fucking rude That's so rude. Well, here's what here's no, no, I'm gonna say this dude. All right, I would Probably not do as much as you okay, but I would do a lot of work Why are you looking at me when you said no because I you you gave me a look like you doubt me Here's the thing. I'd put you in charge of the snacks. I would be in charge of leading us I'm out of leading us a direction you be in charge of the the bread bag and something else. Yes, crap No, no, no, how about this could I be in charge of like like escape plan? Mm-hmm. Would I be escape would but would you give me some of that?

Responsibility. Yes, you are an idea man. You're just not an idea. I'm an idea. I'm the guy. You don't execute I'm the guy behind the guy. I don't do groundwork. Is that what you're saying? Okay, good I was getting offended there. Yeah. No, don't get offended. So I would have like a little like I would have you do ideas This is where the fence is. Yeah, right. This is where you dig the hole Yeah, this is where the Goldberg's gonna. Whatever their names are, right? Yeah, I'm gonna sneak out, right? But you do it. I'll say that to you. You do it Theo. I'll be on the train. I'll be on the train I'll wait for them and you wouldn't be able to go undercover probably No, I'm not asian in this

You have to be asian in this. We're both ourselves, you know, right? Well then I could because the Germans were in cahoots with the No, it could be german-japanese. Yes. I'm japan-herman Yeah, japan-herman. Yeah, you could be japan-herman. I'm japan-herman. Yeah. Oh, who is this? So all right. Well, then that's the deal then but I think that in terms of the light We would do the light shit. Yeah, I could probably see us doing some pretty positive stuff, dude Yeah, I could see you doing some stuff probably building toys for like a yard or something like a schoolyard or something teeter-totter man Doing teeters, you know building teeters You don't see it? No, but oh, I know you mean

For like building toppers, bro I'm building like little wooden like little trucks. I mean, they're they're toys or reliable toys, which I know But you're not making any shoddy fucking toys I know but what you're saying though to me is kids put a lot of trust in the toys Yeah, but in like you're fucking people are in a concentration camp and that's what I'm fucking doing You're just making toys, bro Bro, this is for the kids. I know I'm making a seesaw on the concentration camp Is that what you're saying that I'm doing? Is that what a teeter is?

Totters they call them. Yeah, dude, you're fucking, you know, you're building totters for kids man Local kids are gonna play no matter what kids will play anywhere. That's true You put a kid in the seventh circle of hell and they'll fucking play dominoes, you know what I'm saying? Kids are they're just built into them that you know kids will play they'll play. That's what they like to do You know when you just said that it just strung up something inside me. What was it? I think I want children Yeah Yeah I want to build a seesaw. You had that conversation before here a little bit. Yeah, I talk about yeah

Yeah, but I don't you want kids then You know, it's so funny man. I was just thinking about it, you know I was just thinking about if now's like the time to try and figure that out or or not What are you? What are you 40? I'm I'm 38 All right, you're almost 40 Not that close to 45 die, then I'm never gonna be 40 Yeah, but you're all right You're 38. So who wins that you do

But at the age of 38, I think that you don't think it's about time What the fuck you talking? You don't have any fucking kids You got a beautiful lady. You got a beautiful little fucking kid maker right there if you want it And you ain't even busting out dude. You're out. I built two in the fucking factory. Did you really? Yeah, oh, wow. Did you freeze your eggs? No I thought about it. Yeah, I'll freeze the ladies eggs. Have some fucking respect be a gentleman I'll freeze the fuck out of them. There you go. Say it bro. You want me to Take him to Edmonton with you for a week. Can we the piece of fuck out of them?

I'll do it man, bro. I can just lay him over there Lay him in the snow in a tunnel. Oh my god. What if you guys made a snow child that was incubated in the snow? Wow, that would be beautiful and I could see you doing that. They're called Eskimos, bro Huh? They're called Eskimos, bro. Are they? Yeah, man. Really? Yeah, okay Asians born in the snow. Moes they call them. Yeah moes Yeah, it's like it's not a it's not a racial term, but it's a slang term for Eskimos I know you don't like to talk about moes, slims. I don't like to talk about your like sexual sexual life and and relationships. I know you don't like talking about it. I don't mind talking about it

Right, but I hope you know I'm gonna do a little blessing on you man. Okay I hope to God the Lord that you have a child in the next three years What are you guys talking about? Isn't there volleyball on the pool deck? What are you guys talking about? Get your passports out for the raffle. We can't decide if you want them No, we're gonna have but every time I gotta throw him one of the best one I can tell I had dreams of I had visions of it. Well, what are you guys thinking? I still have to the burden is not on you You can just show up and do whatever the fuck you all of my guy do all the work

Do what work that lork, you know Yeah, huh make them magic. Yeah Right inside to your man. That's work right there, bro. Dude. Yeah, don't let the tone factory. See what happens Yeah, that's fucking vietnamese soup right there. All right. If you say vietnam again, huh? Love that. I've been to vietnam and you haven't okay. I've been to the bentan market. Oh, yeah, you were there, right? Yeah, it was a fun. I stayed at the star hotel. What is this? It's vietnamese. Oh

Yeah, you were in asia, huh? Yeah. Yeah, it's not asia. It's vietnam vietnam. Do you go to brothels ever? No You've never been to a brothel. Here's what happened Here's what happened So I got to vietnam right right and we get to vietnam and um And the taxi driver we just wanted to go see anything, right? And we get in and the first thing to do is take you to a place where you can buy sex if you want it If you want sex, you know, and I was 22 years old. I think when this happened, so Who knows if I wanted it or not. So anyway, this guy takes us we don't know that though

We think he's just you know, we told him like oh take us to uh supermarket. Take us to star hotel. Take us to something, you know, um, the American war. That's what they called it there, right? So So this guy was driving as he dropped us off at a pet shop So we go in and they got fucking pets, you know what I'm saying? And I'm you know, I grew up around pets and you know, I know about some pets and I'm like, oh, this would be great You know, see what pets they have over here. And so they have um large parrots Parakeets and parrotlets which are small parrots

And so we're fucking looking at all these parrots and shit next, you know what my buddy kind of moves into the back of the There's like a curtain and he moves back behind there and next thing I know my other buddy in the south This lady comes out and gets me and him next, you know, we're all back there And it's a prostitution and they do in prostitution And so they got the birds up front and it's just a it's a decoy You know the birds are just up there faking it. None of them even want to go home to new people's homes And in the back they're trying to suck you out What do you mean? Yeah trying to suck you out of your dick

Suck you out Suck you out suck the essence out of you. Yeah through your dick hole. Yeah Yeah, it's gonna suck you out of your dick just like normal like they do in america, but they're trying to do it there Yeah, and they're hiding behind pets doing it. Yeah, and that that honestly broke my heart It did. Yeah, because these animals don't know that Yeah, they don't they don't Yeah, it's animal they wake up every day thinking they got a chance to find a new home Right

Suck it back that the yeah that just 20 30 feet away and a little bit of drywall Yeah, you know and a cash register that people are sucking people out of each other When I was in thailand before I met you babe. Oh, yeah, sure I remember didn't you have a girlfriend while you were in thailand? No, no, no, no way no girlfriend Yeah, only once uh, yeah, and you know I like every day to this brothel right And one day, you know, I picked this girl. We went upstairs And you want to hear joy. Mm-hmm. You want to see joy? Mm-hmm We're laying there and I'm trying to get a wrecked. Mm-hmm

I couldn't get it rocked. Jesus. So I looked at I go, you know what? I'm still gonna pay you Mm-hmm, but you don't have to have sex with me. Wow the joy on her face. I've never seen I've never seen joy like that Oh, man. It was like, thank you Like she was crying almost. Yeah, she didn't that's never happened. It was like, babe And we just sat there and watched tv all night. Wow. Yeah, so you know pretty woman If you don't say I don't work for the light, I do. Yeah, you know, you made a hooker watch television with you I wish you could have been out early. It was like, it was a tie a MTV or something. Oh, man. Yeah, light work. Yeah Yeah, that's wow. Huh. That's crazy, man

Well, you know, what's interesting is how like, you know, what's interesting is like how we view, um Like, uh Like form relations and like visitors people visiting from other countries in America and how they do in other countries Like when I wasn't like I was in china a week ago and they don't fucking you were in china a week ago Shanghai. Yeah, you're really in china. Yeah. Oh, Shanghai and they do not Dude, I saw a man. I saw a man pick his nose feet and feed it to a cat You know, I saw a guy pick a booger out of doesn't feed it to a cat. You don't need to go to Shanghai for that

Yeah, I know you guys see that here locally, but not everybody has you know experience. I am my boogers that Cirque de Soleil Not everybody has it right here in the premises. Yeah Yeah, but what happened was dude, they you cannot get citizenship there. Like if you're not chinese, they don't give a fuck They're not like, yeah, come here come spend they don't so many other countries are like, fuck you get the fuck out of here You know, yeah, it's like, why would you want to live there though? It's a beautiful place Yeah, you'd be bored so quick though, man But you're you're thinking china just looks one certain way china is massive

You have Shanghai and then you have the provinces that are I know about city life and country life And then you have we have a year or two. Okay, you think that new york is the same as Nebraska Food you don't remember your days on the corn farm It's like you forget quickly Farmer yeah, you were on the corn farm, bro. Yeah, dude But it's just interesting how like you go to some of these other places and they don't fucking want us there It's like we're not even welcome and I know it's like lead by example, you know welcome everybody Yeah, but at the same time sometimes it's like at least let everybody let people know that these people don't fucking you know

Like you're not really welcome in these places. Yeah, you know in France. They're they're rude And so I understand welcoming people to America. Yeah, but I don't understand sometimes saying, okay Let's turn America into china so that chinese people can feel welcome here You know people come here because they want to be in america like they want to be fucking american You know like or because they want like american shit, you know Yeah, nobody everybody doesn't want to move here from sweden and have it be sweden, you know, right because are they being fucking sweden You know, sometimes it's just like, I don't know. This should make you mad. You shouldn't be a politician. I shouldn't be I don't think you know what the fuck you're talking about. I don't know dude

I sometimes I don't even know what the fuck you're talking about you you said city life and country life, dude They're two different things. Yeah And it would be the same in china. Okay name a country in china a country in china. Yeah Yeah, a country in china. He stick it to his guts. He's not gonna. He's sticking to it. Oh, what? Yeah, please answer So you're just on the same level. Yeah, my country is in china That's a fucking, no, that's a cologne that went out of business eranoid Yeah, eranoid

What do you do, dude? Name a country in china. Yeah, uh, garrower Garrower, I don't know that one. You know, garrower. I think they have hong kong. Is hong kong a country? No, there's no countries in china Hong Kong used to be belongs to um to england. See and then now they belong to china. You see, but it's a Island of china. It's a city where people throw in your shit. Well, nobody in here knows anything is what i'm starting to gather We don't know anything. We really don't we don't we don't know a lot about a lot of that That's why we have people on to teach us. We don't well. You shouldn't have had me Did you ever did you ever take mall pictures with your friends? No, I never went to the mall with my friends. That wasn't school. It was a state hospital But you have to understand that back back when I was in high school

Did they have wallets? Didn't have a lot. All I had was um, I would probably have a joint Okay, am I in a lighter in a lighter? Wow. Yeah. Yeah, cool. Wow. I was a hesher, dude. Really? Yeah, I was a bad dude man like mc hesher. Yeah, I was mc hesher during high school an artist Yeah, no bob bob was the artist wasn't he who bob your brother steve. Oh steve. Yeah Sometimes you guys look the same you look like bob and that's my point. You think we all look the same No, you and steve look the same sometimes sometimes. I can't tell if I look deep inside of your face. I see steve I think nothing in common. Really? We have nothing Sometimes I feel like steve's trapped inside of you

steve is forever Yeah, hey bob You a hongo hongo You're hungry. Yeah Can you pick me up bob coli? Yeah, coli will come over. Yeah, he's a kid My brother fucks too. Is that weird? Oh, I've seen him fuck you're also in pictures of him are drawings him fucking Oh, yeah, he draws his own pictures of him fucking. Yeah. Yeah, it's how two drawings It looked one of me was fucking pretty good in the other one. They were resting

So what are you gonna do now? What what so you have did man up happened? We did a pilot. Yeah, we got a pilot. I know but does that is that gonna be a oh you did yeah for comedy central Now we're getting on full pilot. So it was a digital series. Oh, so now you're gonna do a full pilot for comedy central Thank you guys. You're very well. I'll save the day and so you stepped that he looked great in it didn't he did I thought it was really cute. Roger's awesome. Did he like it? Yeah, he did. Yeah, that's cool So it's gonna be a pilot you seem like a champion and then when it's a series will we get the bed go back on or no? Oh, are you gonna our stories resolve? No, no, no, but what is what's gonna end up happening now? I wasn't fully resolved. It's just seem like Bobby just can't get it together. Yeah, but the thing is is that that's also

That was kind of made when we get to prime time. Will we be on prime time or are you gonna get bigger comics? Answer whoa, we're not gonna get any bigger comments. Well, they're like, can you diversify the program more and we're like What do you want us to do have a fucking alien on the program we had Kalilah call up. She's a woman Okay, we helped Bobby. He is from another Different place than some other people Yeah, we had Ron Funches on an episode. Yeah, you know, we had a Jewish couple that got engaged like I feel like you're some diver It's just crazy like these networks. Like can you make it? What do you want us to do? Have a fucking talking

You know, what do you want to do teach a fucking giraffe to speak and fucking put it on your out of your mind? Yeah, yeah, you're gonna get a lot of that. Yeah, I guess I don't know we crushed it though and you guys helped a lot I really want that to happen for you. It's fun. Well, thanks, man. But but the Theo Vaughn show that I want Is the show about him and his life back home All those characters you do on your stand up. Mm-hmm. That's the show like that boy Gert. Yeah You going home, right? And you reuniting with all your all fucked up friends And just dealing something with just all those stories are just heaven Dude, we had his kid in our in my neighborhood named Robert and he was like he thought he was twins that never got separated, right?

And so Yeah, when he would talk he would say something and then under his breath he would say it again say it again You're like that. Oh, it never ended. Yeah And it scared the fuck out of everybody, bro, and he could not stop doing it. He kept doing Like an echo. Yeah Whoa, and you'd ask him why he didn't he said he was there was twins inside him and one of them never got out That's so funny. Wow I mean that does happen like that guy does it really who took out this massive tumor

It was like freaking 60 pound tumor and when they Inspected it or dissected it. They found like basically it was his twin that had never really Differentiate population, huh? Yeah. Did he say something the twin like amen? I was in here the whole time Dude like you ever seen like stone babies. What's that? Stone babies are basically like stillborns like when women when a woman is pregnant and the baby dies inside and then Over time like usually the woman expels it like it has to come out

But her body sort of make builds this wall around it. So there's this calcified Body in there for like her whole life. Wait, wait. Is there photos online of a stone baby? Mm-hmm. Oh my god. You buy them on the internet I could see you guys having a couple in here. I'm honestly shocked stone babies Stone baby. I'm looking it up stone babies. I haven't been here in a long time. I like a year on tiger belly No, no, there's a stone baby right here, bro. Is it really? It's been a year Oh I feel like you could eat it so sad. No, you can't eat it. They're really cool because they're actually like hard like rock hard

You can't boil them. They're calcified. Oh, look at this stone, baby. Look Oh What was that? I think that's a baby. They got stone Oh, that's what I think that's what I looked at. That's not a stone. That's a type. No, that's not a stone, baby No, that's not a baby. What is that? That's just a baby. Oh Does bobby seem like what does bobby seem like a lot of time? What about this? What is this? Oh, that's um harlequin Harlequin excelsis harlequin excelsis. Yeah, you know these these ones grow up. You know that

Put the glasses on the yeah, no, no. Have you ever seen harle harlequins grow up? He don't want it I'm going to show you harlequin. I know harlequin older harlequin older. Yeah It's scary Yeah, what do you think scares uh comedian? That's what they look like when they get a little Oh, he's cute. But when they're born look like this He's just closing his eyes. What do you think makes comedians not want to have children you think? I don't know but Because none of our friends have kids. I mean if this came out

If I had a baby and this came out and I was holding don't put that out in the universe Yeah, what is wrong with you bob? I'll declare it. I would just take it. Gosh What would you do with it? It's dead. No, this is a lot The harlequin baby, I would take it and I would you know, I would live in a tent with it You're gonna get busted and I would charge I would charge money to see it. What are you talking about, dude? You sound like what are you? Who are you elizabeth smart? Get your act You sound like the guy that took elizabeth smart That crazy guy voldemortar. What was that guy's name?

Jerry Voldemort, yeah Take that fucking strictly business out of your eyes, huh? Your glasses, they're dumb dude. I got these in another country. You idiot canada. Can I try them on? Yeah, sure Yeah, yeah, are they are they special? Do they do stuff? Huh? Are they those? No, I did fuck up last week Let me see babe. Okay. How you doing last week? I actually were there's a lot of mayor I wore those 3d glasses to the beach actually and they fucking Almost burned holes in my eyes, dude. I had them on in the sun for like about two hours You were 3d glasses out in the sun. It's not good for you. That's what bobby does. He he

Um watches for six hours at a time videos of people with uh with who are colorblind And they put on that those special glasses their family. Oh, that's cool Yeah, they're calling chroma tears. Yeah, they're chroma and chroma. Have you ever seen those videos? Uh-huh. They're the best You'll cry. You'll cry. Really? Yeah, like you'll see an old man. And he put glasses on it. Well, they'll give him a pack like happy birthday You know grandpa phillips What's this? And they'll go it's it's whoa. Why does he sound like a slave owner? What's this?

And they go well it's um We all chipped in because they're expensive. Yeah to get you these. Whoa the glasses Right and they'll be like, yeah, the glasses is like, I gotta try mine right now Yeah, they're like, yeah try mine right now So he'll he takes them for like 20 minutes to open it. Yeah, and then he'll oh they'll always read the pet like there's like always a little That's right Colorblind UV range yeah, right and then they put it on

And then this is what generally happens. They'll take it off and they'll go. Oh my god And they start crying for a second and they'll put it back on. Oh my god. So what happened? It's so beautiful. And what is it? Strippers? No, man, he's sliding. No, they've never seen green. Who gives a fuck? They're 80 years old bro. It doesn't matter. Imagine dude. Imagine your whole life, right? Yeah Yeah, you thought that you know the sky was just gray And then you put on no, yeah, imagine putting you put and then they're blue You see colors for the and then they'll go. Oh, wow. They'll just they'll go

No, no, no You only see black and white right now. Yeah, you see black and white right now, right? Well, you you'd be his like wife and like give it right right and here you go. Here you go, uh grandpa phillips Right, yeah And then they'll do that. Yeah, and they'll start crying Okay Okay, I don't know what you're doing right now. I think he's acting. Yeah, honestly You didn't follow it. Yeah, yeah

And it happens to a lot of senior citizens. Well, no, we're bored. We'll no color blind. Let's fucking retard Yeah, I don't think that's the appropriate way to address somebody with a mental illness Okay, just say this you fucking idiot You fucking moron bro. Don't make me take half the sea alice right. All right. I'm gonna just say this right now Okay. Yeah colorblind. You're born with it. Yeah, are you so their whole life? Maybe it's Maybelline So their whole You fucking moron listen to me right now. George laughs dude. All right. He's from another country. He's from Idaho Right, so they can't see so he was he could have lied colorblind

They're they have it of their whole lives who just people they're a colorblind not anyone specific Yeah, I think if people are colorblind, I think we got We got to get them more colors. Yeah. Yeah, you know, that's what enchroma does and here's another A series of videos I cry at yeah is the hearing one. Oh Right. Yeah, well, they they can't hear fart for the first time. That's one of you heard that They have one some guy had never heard of fart and then he puts on like as fast as hearing aid and his buddy farts, huh? Oh, yeah. Yeah, he's like 20 minutes. Yeah, he's like he's shaking the guy's butt trying to get him to do it again And a queef is even

My nephew's deaf and he has a cochlear implant and when he's sick of everybody, he just turns everything off That's an option that he has he's like I can't I want listen to my mom or dad Just turns it off and I think that's gonna be the future. I think you're gonna see a lot We're gonna start to control our senses a lot more than Um, then you know, like we've looked at them as blessings in a lot of ways and I think we're gonna start to control them I think it's one thing you're gonna see people turning down their ears People being able to shut their eyes off if they just want to like stop the intake serious Yeah, I feel like that that would be really

Um useful for somebody like me because I feel like a lot of stimulus overwhelms me a lot So if I'm seeing too many things or there's too many things happens Well, just close your eyes. I get freaked out like it causes me anxiety. Yeah, I have to like receive These things one at a time. I can't drown noise out. I hear it all. Why can't you just put ear plugs in? Well, she could bobby, but we're also talking about technological advancements If you want to be a caveman, dude, you know Yeah, but if you don't want to see close your eyes put ear plugs in and then do that thing or somebody who's autistic somebody who's who Instead of seeing like for instance somebody without autism. They look at your face and they just see a face

Somebody with autism they look at your face and they're looking at a million different photographs Like that's how they perceive things. It's an it's an overwhelming Amount of stimulus that they receive it that they receive So yeah, like if I'm able to turn that off or mute it It might help 100% So when they they see people they see like a dream board or something like a bunch of stuff Yeah, like when I look at your face, it's just a face, right? But for them It's like so many different bits of information coming all at once. Yeah, it's more than just a face. It's a fiasco

It's like everybody Yeah, it's like watching like a it's like watching a marathon or something's just a lot going on Yeah, and I wish I had all you could turn up your autism like a you know He had a crank on your back or some type of a nozzle you could turn it up to like, you know become more artistic aware Whoa, be really interesting. You can go to vegas and make a lot of money Yeah, but you don't want to be some fucking coop that uses it like that use it for something positive If you don't be one of those weirdos in there just cranked up on

Yeah, fucking play in fucking backgammon. I don't know You're making some fucking gentlemen money. No. Yeah, man. You're better than that No, I did that you're taking a bus up there with 700 your buddies just to fucking make $1,200 and come back. I'll smoke that on cigarettes, dude Maybe a $300 fucking massage. You're better than that What do we do at a time? Over an hour I didn't think I had anything to talk about today. Well, we didn't

Have you been in here? Well, how did we do an hour because your beautiful girlfriend sits here and it keeps us all awake and alert She's like a flat. She's like a like a beautiful plant. You know Not even living or breathing Not breathing. Well, I give you oxygen. But you give us out. I got a lot of I really keep us awake a lot of people say though a lot of people say on the internet that you and I I have good chemistry together. Really? Yeah, you want to read them? I mean, I read a lot No, I think a lot of people said you it seemed like a guy like you would teach a guy like me chemistry

No, no, you and I have really good um a symbiotic a symbiotic kind of vibe together, you know If you want to negate it, do you think a lot of racist stuff has been said in here today or no? No Compared to other episodes we've done now who says really racist stuff and I want to know who it is and you can tell me And I won't say anything Eric Griffin, maybe And first of all Pick a race before you fucking say something, you know, right? I was milling around between like nine different ethnic Right, you know what I'm saying, bro. He's the irony. And what is it? I know what is he?

What's that game? We have to get the little puzzle pieces of different color all the way around Right. He's a mammoth. You have to answer the questions. You get the little pie piece Yeah, he's a trivial pursuit Yeah, what else man? Um, you want to plug anything or we're gonna do questions for you. I know but I want to plug you I want to plug something. No, I don't have anything. I mean, I got some tour dates may be coming up. What is it? You know, uh I don't know I got chicago coming up august 16. Which one are you gonna play a life factory? You ever been there? No, I play schaumburg. Yeah

It's laugh factory in the city. It's in the city. It's in the city. Yeah And you do whole weekend there. Yeah for thursday friday saturday. Oh, that's amazing. We already sold out actually So august 16th through the 18th and the laugh factory don't plug it if it's sold out But still I wouldn't mind people standing outside That's real social media zany's and nashville september 14th and 15th And then um, what else do we got? We got the comedy zone in charlotte and that is october 4th 5th and 6th. Love that really? Yeah

I'm looking forward to that. Have you played it before? No, I love that guy. Really? Yeah, it's even have fun there I'm looking forward to that. I got the skyline comedy at appleton whisk countson And I've never been there. Do you get to I get depressed when I'm on the road a little bit You're very depressed and my problem is where I used to masturbate And then I'd masturbate so much that I couldn't even wake up or move around the next day Yeah, I end up lactic acid. Huh lactic acid. I don't know what was coming out of me at certain points It got definitely strange, you know, I got past semen So I don't know what it was. I could have been lactic acid

Lactic acid buildup The muscle Oh, I would say you meant spraying out of me Um, I just end up not leaving the hotel room really. I could see that. Yeah, I just sit there and I'll just like Stare at you know my iPad for like five hours now when you were single Was it more fun to go on the road? Maybe Well, that's a good point. Yeah, I think whenever you're younger too It's like you want to go party like I don't you know, Bobby doesn't drink. I don't drink. So it's like I'm not out there partying

Yeah, when you were also younger, right, you'd never Like I couldn't when I went in my early 20s I couldn't afford to travel anywhere But now you're in cities that you normally would never go to And then all of a sudden you're single and then also I couldn't get girls really before Yeah, so now it's like oh when I perform that gives me an advantage. So it's like Yeah, that there was that excitement and also on top of it. You're opening for people when you're younger Yeah, so I was like you didn't have the pressure of headlining. That's true

Right. So like I get to go up and kill for 20 minutes and then and then just hang out, right? I didn't have to do any press Yeah, and you can be an alcoholic then. Yeah, and it's super fun Yeah, but then now, you know, I'm older. I have to headline. I have to make money I have to draw and you have those pressures. So it just takes the fun away from it Yeah, when I did the odd ball with those guys a couple years ago. That was a lot of fun Because I get to be with my friends And you're performing in front of a large group of people, but there's no pressure really Do you feel like more nervous when you're acting than when you're doing stand-up? Yeah tomorrow. I have a table read. I'm petrified

What are you already need help with? There's a word in there that In in my table read it. Wow. I love this. See this is true love. Isn't it when a woman helps a man with a word? Well, we'll do that later. We'll do that later. But what's a question? What's the question? It's cute though, and it's cool I'm helpful advice with bobby kalyla at thio vile Hey guys, I'm a big fan and a freshman in high school I'm getting tested soon for add slash adhd and I'm almost certain that I have it I also have a condition called 10. Is it 10 tonight is tonight is tonight. What the year tonight?

Yes tonight, which is a ringing in the air my ringing is nonstop So I've never heard silence these things combined with the fact that I'm terrible at math Have made school very hard for me and it caused me to have suicidal thoughts since elementary school I've lost hope that I'm going to get through high school But my parents are dead sad on me going to college the only things I'm interested in are pursuing writing and blacksmithing Oh, what should I do? My name is mini malo. Well mini malo blacksmithing. I would change the name of it because people are going to think that it's you know Something like a slavery. Yeah. No, I don't know what blacksmithing is a lot of people don't and I wouldn't just run around to say

Yeah, in fact, yeah, a lot of you some black people might even be like, whoa Tone it down a little, you know too soon guy Too soon and it's 2018 so um I'm gonna say this For this guy mini malo. Yeah. Um, first of all, having a name like mini malo Is gonna make it tough for you to get a job anywhere outside of probably being like a disc jockey or something Um, look man, I think you know working metalworks and doing metallurgy and all of that or whatever

You know busting out with iron or fucking around with some copper some heated metals or whatever You know, that's beautiful stuff. Dude get out there. You get a special, um helmet You know, you get a fucking torch and it probably keeps your mind pretty focused So even if you have add you can't you can't like forget about what you're doing when you have a fucking torch going, you know So even if somebody with add is gonna focus while there's fire flying out of their hands So it's not like that man. Go build some necklaces build a bridge rubble wherever the fuck you want, dude Yeah, swords. It builds. That's what I would do. So I feel like he's at an advantage. He knows how old is he Uh 19 a freshman in high school. Yeah, he's what 15 and he knows two things that he loves and is good at

Like that's like fifth when I was 15 I didn't know Anything like I kind of sort of like wanted to be in the medical field But I think I just sent that to appease my parents like I didn't know what the fuck I wanted to do So yeah, you're doing just fine about the tinnitus. He's only 15. Yeah, and he got tinnitus too But tinnitus is the ringing in your ear. I get it when I'm really dehydrated And if I've like worked out too hard and you just get the whom and it's really really unpleasant I would go see a really good

Um eent doctor. Where does he live? What city? Uh, he didn't say he doesn't know probably. No, I mean the ring could be pretty bad And also I don't mind a little ring in my ear during the holidays. It's the rest of the season when it really gets on my nerves, you know Yeah, but tinnitus is a It's shitty, but why does tinnitus sound so fucking good? Yeah, that's right. What do you got tinnitus? Yeah, it sounds like tonight tonight. You're gonna fucking party. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, man. No, there is no tomorrow. What are we doing tonight? I got tonight Dude, you heard uh, I'm not gonna live through the night. So this is it. Oh, you got tinnitus

Sounds like a drug actually. Yeah, it does sound like an indie film What are you shooting up tinnitus? Oh fucking somebody else to Eric Dirkerson or whatever text me Griffin What are you Griffin's text here? Uh, nothing. He just fucking sent a blank bubble What else man? What else we got? We'll get one more one. Okay. Well, it's for all three of you. Hey guys I'm a big fan from nyc and I have a question for all of you. There's a Japanese film called afterlife It's premises when you die You get to pick a single moment good or bad in your afterlife to relive over and over

Oh, what moment would you choose? Wait? Hang on you get to pick one good thing in your life Uh, it's premises when you die you get to pick a single moment good or bad In your life to relive over and over in the afterlife. What moment would you over and over? So the my whole afterlife is just going to be that same thing on replay on on repeat groundhog day Is it one day or just one moment if it's a day? That's it's a moment the guy said moment at the beginning But a moment could I guess be a hole? It can't be a super long fucking moment. That's called a day Well, there you go. Theo set the parameters No, I'm a time cop man. I don't like it when people sorry roger

Yeah, so a moment. Yeah We get the definition one more time. Yeah. Yeah a moment. What is that? Probably the coffee shop with kalayla Oh, oh my god, sweetie. That's so sweet because that's not what I had in mind Can you tell Theo what that moment? Tell me about that when I was went to the coffee shop that's taking me there Now, let me ask you in this moment In this moment take you back. No in the in this moment though. Am I aware of what the moment is or am I just kind of I don't think because I had a hard time parking

Right, so in my head. I'm like, you know, if I go, oh, this is the day I meet kalayla this coffee shop I don't I don't mind looking for parking, but if I had to relive the Moment of me parking and then not knowing why I'm parking or whatever I don't think you experience that you experience it once and it resets everything resets. So it's just that Oh, well, then it's got to be a fucking thing That doesn't happen just took away the people the day met kalayla. You can fuck anywhere, bro You can only meet I think it's the day when remember I was doing those like in and outs real quick and your vagina Oh, we were doing I'm circuit training

Yeah, we did circuit training. That's cool. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you stick the ticket in that Yeah, you just gotta go like four pumps now and then go to the corner and like do five jumping jacks Oh, that's cool. Yeah, and then like you'd come around and I'd like blow them four times and then go back to another corner Do another like do some abs that moment. Oh wow. I was working out and getting myself off. I like that circuit training, huh? Yeah, yeah, that's the moment I buried boot camp. Wow. What about your moment buried boot camp buried at that I don't know. I can't think of it won't be that moment. I'll tell you that right now. You know, you know This is gonna sound really bad but I was once

You know that feeling when you're young and you're so in love and there's just a perfect song is playing It's at this one moment at a strip club and I was sitting on top of a boy That I really liked and we had just met that night and the stars just aligned He eventually turned into an asshole. Yeah, but I'm not in that. I know but I'm just saying I I don't care about the person. I just cared about the feeling. Oh, then I have a moment that is it Staring at Tara Black's toes for 16 hours. No, no, no, my moment is when I was in gross, huh? I was in Beirut and I was it was the strip club Now you told the story that the really pretty woman Moroccan woman. Yeah, see that feeling

Because I was taking the elevators up and I couldn't believe I was gonna have sex with this Moroccan woman. Wow Was she deaf and Moroccan? Yeah. Wow. And then we went in and we did it and that was a pretty good moment I take mine back No, you can't I take mine back mine's still gonna be that you want a coffee shop Okay, mine was our third day at the attic. All right, that one was much better I don't believe you because that's because the first time we met we didn't hold hands We didn't do any of that. I was just sort of watching him trying to find people who he he was hoping would recognize him. Yeah Yeah

He would like put himself like he would let's go in that skate shop and I knew what he was doing He was just he was looking for someone to be like, can I take a picture with you just so he would impress me Um, so it wasn't until the third day till we actually, you know broke through all that other bullshit. So maybe that Wow, and did that make you upset that he was doing that? No, I kind of anticipated it. Yeah, what about you Theo? What's your moment one of my greatest moments or a moment that I would relive he said What was it again? I'm sorry. Yeah, you'll relive the same moment the moment you would relive over and over in your after It would reset. It would reset. Yeah. Yeah, not filling that frisbee up in that tunnel. That's for Not that sporting goods and not hanging out in the sporting goods section

I my bowels even rumble a little if I even walked through a sporting good section Yeah, um a moment that I would relive over and over again Probably the first time that I watched bridges of madison county. Have you guys ever seen that movie? I really do like that movie a lot It's a great movie man. He looks through his that rear of the window near right and he sees her That's so sad. She like grabs like the handle of the door. Yeah. Yeah, she's gonna get out of a good movie Probably the first time I ever saw that I'll take mine back again. No, no, you can't anymore five times. No, I know, but it was the problem when you go on the road with my sister Hey, you give a girl a moment. She takes a mile

She takes a day It doesn't even matter. It doesn't even matter what moment it is because if it resets That's then it's like who gives a shit if it's me grocery stress shopping at gelsons That's a good one. That's a good one. It's you're at peace. You're at car right So it doesn't matter or just like cuddling in bed with your animals Yeah, that'd be a good moment if you're a force to choose a bad moment Which one would you live over and over A bad moment because the option in the movie was good or bad

So i'm sure some people chose bad a bad moment that could relive over and over Yeah, or at least yeah, you would hate to relive over and over or what I hate to relive How about that would it could be a moment where it's something bad happened, but I could make different decisions uh theo parameters For this moment. Yeah, um, you can't see very far. You can only see about 10 feet Oh, there you go. Oh, here's the thing and there is a extreme cold front coming I see one that is gonna kill a lot of people All right with that involved. Yeah, uh-huh pop quiz hot shot It you know what the bad moment was my first tv spot

Oh, I was I was so green That I was just terrible. I was so nervous. It was a show called friday night videos And um, it was my first tv spot and I was so bad That they didn't even air it And what was it uh, what kind of we just stand up comedy stand up. Yeah, dude mom was too. They didn't air it really Yeah, it was your craig fergusson. They didn't air for craig fergusson. I thought they had to They didn't they paid me for it. I mean he's paying like a whatever. Did I hurt you when they didn't do it? It hurt my feelings. Yeah Wow, that would have been devastating. Why didn't did I give you reasons they said

Some of the wording or something the way that I'd said something. I couldn't say it like that I didn't even know they think they could do that though You know like craig lives right over here. Is he really have you talked to him since then? No You know what? I'm gonna tell craig to book you on this podcast. Yeah. Yeah. Tell him you owe me one Yeah, I really wouldn't I really want to do that. Tell him there's a guy. Yeah program and he's never been He did a set on your show and he didn't air. Yeah, can we I wanted to set that up. I'd love to do that. That'd be great Yeah, because how long ago was that? 10 years

Damn. Yeah, but you were so green probably then. Yeah, but still I mean I've worked hard and got a good set I put it in there. Wow Yeah, I mean, I've been I've been cut out of movies. Have you? Oh, yeah Well, you went to a movie theater and you're watching it. You're like, I'm not in it Pineapple express Well, no, I'm still in it. Oh, I mean cut completely cut out the whole thing Yeah, but you can find him at any pandex for us guys if you keep your eyes open, you know Which wow

Well, I did not know that about you. Yeah. Yeah, what was yours the Friday night videos and when it air it was my first one And when it didn't air I just was devastated by it and then um Then years later I did Premium blend. Yeah, and the set was bad and then when I saw it back It was bad. I didn't like it. Yeah And then but then when I walked around a couple of times people people recognized me from it So I thought it wasn't that bad, you know from what how I imagined it But um early on man, those things are so important

Yeah, right. Yeah, it just means a lot to you. I can't believe this are your legs. They look like don't even fucking go with your body That's crazy, dude. I'm old man No, I'm not saying you're old. I think you're nice looking. I just think that It seems crazy to have legs like that. I also want to tell people um about my obsession with the next generation star trek Yeah, is it good or bad obsession? It's a great obsession. And if you haven't seen star trek next generation There's a there's an episode I want you to see called the inner light season five second to the last episode That's a two hour one. It's a one hour one. It's one of the greatest sci-fi episodes I've ever seen It'll change your life guys. So please watch

What's your top five movies before we go top five movies burgers of medicine county dream team? um Really? Yeah, dream team is good, dude. Michael Keaton. Yeah, that's a good movie christopher lewis. Yeah dream team It's christopher lewis. Lloyd. Lloyd christopher. Lloyd. Yeah christopher lewis is this lady? I know that married that man in christopher lewis and he was a fucking asshole. Okay, whatever. Um Um, what else? Uh, my favorite movies are the patriot, obviously You know, you know, you know who's in that mel Gibson and kirk fox. Kirk fox is in that How great is that? That's great. He's the best. He's the best of that. Yeah. Yeah, so that I remember watching that movie in the theater

And going that's the guy that works at the tennis shop that by my house Finding neverland I like And um, these are eclectic weird movies, bro. Are they? Yeah, and um, because generally people go Oh apocalypse now or you know, something like that the godfather godfather. Yeah um I also like that other movie frequency with Dennis quaden. Have you seen that one? No We find an old radio and he's able to talk to his father who's who died Oh, uh, a ghost. It's a good movie. What was the one where they were like little people and they're in your they're inside the body

Oh, I know what it is. It's called. Um, honey. I shrunk the kids No, there was one where martin short gets into a little tiny toothpaste. No, he gets into a little spaceship What is it? No, it's not a fantastic voyage No, they go inside the body and now he has to live inside somebody's like bloodstreams Interest what interspace interspace is it good? It sounds bad. It's pretty bad, but I like it. Yeah Yeah, it sounds pretty bad. What is the movie you guys like to watch together? well my top five probably have you seen old boy yeah the Korean one it's not

that great yeah the Korean one is that where they're all fighting in a school give me just that no that's um that's battle royale yeah so that yeah but yeah but yeah but also Japanese I didn't say that yeah but also fuck the fuckhead I didn't say that okay no guy what I'm saying I said the movie I didn't like it oh that's not the movie I said what movie did you say oh boy man okay I don't watch it oh what I'm saying to you white is watch it whoa I will try and watch it I've seen the advertisements it doesn't look that great advertising yeah there is no advertising yes it is it looks like there's a

troubled long-haired Japanese guy outside of a fucking lot of like bright lights and he has on a jacket that's kind of like damn that's just shoveled that is kind of true true movies I think yeah name the rest of my boy okay Paris Texas Paris Texas all yellow I'm sure both old yellow not erase anything with Akira clear Kurosawa yeah I like Rushmore top it's good if you'd like to talk I know that's what I said when he said it anyway thanks for listening to another episode of Tiger Belly um that was Tiger Belly's a delicacy is it yeah what is it what's in it tiger belly an actual tiger's belly yeah there's no fucking

way anyone's eating a tiger oh yeah because they're solitary creatures too it's not like when they are unsolitary anyway listen thanks for thanks for listening to another episode of Tiger Valley go to Ridge wallet comm slash what slash nah nah Tiger Belly promo code Tiger Belly promo code Tiger Belly and I was a little off today but you know what I thought so look I love being around you man it's nighttime and I don't usually like to talk at night time yeah but I really like being with you I like being and I think that one day we should do something together yeah like what kind of thing you mean like a oh I don't have

video or something whoa you can do bigger than that buddy still buddy cop I feel like you guys can do like a buddy show like a real series or yeah real show I could see it maybe like about oh I know what it is I'm blind or you're blind yeah and you're deaf they did that movie no no no no you're blind and gluten-free yeah yeah and we're stuck in a burning bakery right it's called the burning Baker boys the pretty boys yeah you guys brothers oh we're not brothers but we're cousins and we also don't know this we could be brothers you and I work at like an amp-m how about this no that's too easy man yeah it sounds fucking way

easy I know but just the premise what about the last hitchhiker is it you and me hitchhiking across America or a different country wow more of a reality show yeah sure we're going to Hawaii they had a lot of hitchhikers there you go but where they go there was another premise what about this well the show that I picked a show with me and David show maybe it would work with me and yeah we're handcuffed but there's a real show and we have to stay handcuffed learning magic for like six months not learning across America learning magic in hopes that we'll get on but a travel show that would be yeah it'd be a

travel show but I feel like you guys wouldn't necessarily fight we wouldn't get along I feel like you and David show are very antagonistic so you would somebody would be injured at some point the last war we needed a movie called the last war and it's you and me giving taking people to revisit Sarajevo all right Sarajevo last yeah anyway yeah thanks for you anyway I'm trying to break the record yeah thanks for what are we at now what is it going on what are we at now what happened he's a little far from me it's 130 I think someone has 150 Ian what for how long the episode has been at yeah more and

went pretty far too oh I can't imagine that he's not 130 fine okay that's perfect yeah 130 is a very long time very late hour and a half yeah that was good yeah it's a lot all right give it to you on a run of applause all right thank you guys and I appreciate it Bobby thank you so much Eddie show dates Bobby anything club show dates for Bobby not for a while not for a while guys thanks again slept King huh slept King he's going back to slept and it really helps make sure you check out Theo Vaughn's podcast this past weekend because Bobby and him just did it follows on Instagram at Tiger Belly on

Twitter at the Tiger Belly emails any questions at the Tiger Belly at gmail.com you can follow Kalyla on all social media at Calamity K my god and Bobby's ball sack is out this is Tiger Belly see you next week very dark very dark are yours much darker I don't find them dark look like a delicacy delicacy wow bro I can't believe you have that are you flexing your nuts hey Prime members you can listen to Tiger Belly ad-free on Amazon music download the Amazon music app today or you can listen ad-free with Wondry plus in Apple podcast before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short

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