TigerBelly - Episode 155: Thomas Lennon & The Rising Tide

Episode Date: August 15, 2018

Thomas and Bobo talk Detroit spaghetti, figurative push pins, an egg assault, a Korean Stan Lee, and Gustav the Man Servant. Bonus episodes every Monday only at: http://patreon.com/tigerbellySupport us by supporting our sponsors!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

You're listening ad-free on Wondery Plus. Music You ready? Yes. Five, four, three, two, one. Music Welcome to another episode of The Tiger Belly. I have my beautiful girlfriend with me. Her name is Kalilah.

Give her a round of applause, everybody. She's wonderful. We've got Georgetown USA right there with his pink penis and his pink skin and his white. You're so white. You know, with that kind of shirt on, you're like the whitest of whites. I love it.

Keep doing it. Keep doing it. Yeah. Because you guys rule the world. You understand that? You and the Russians and everybody. I love it. I love it. I love what you guys are doing. And then we got his handsome cousin right there.

Gorgeous. Way better than you. Gorgeous. Way better. Like God spent some time on Bryce. So give Bryce a round of applause. He was back from the farms, man. He was back from the farms.

And we got Flip Flip. I love them. What's up? What's up? From the Philippine state of the islands of the Phillips. The Phillips. Right there, man. The Flip Flips.

Yeah. And guys, what a wonderful, what a wonderful guest we have here. I, you know, when George a couple of months ago said, what's your wish list? Who did I put in there? I put a lot of big people in there. Clooney.

Clooney. Yeah, Clooney was on it. Barack Obama. David DeCovney. Yeah, yeah. He was on it. DeCovs. DeCovs.

DeCovs was on it. You know what I mean? I literally said Thomas Lennon, but I don't know if you'll do it. Remember I said that? Yeah. But you put your name down. And guess what?

Who we have right now? I don't know. We have, you know who we have today? We have motherfucking Thomas Lennon. Give him a round of applause. He was like, Thomas Lennon. From Reno 911, a thousand movies. Sean Saves the World.

Odd couple. Good luck. Good bye. Bobby Lee. Yeah. Yeah. This is it, man. I'm going to sing an intro for you every time I'm introduced.

Oh, okay. Yeah. Yeah. Thomas Lennon, everybody. Give him a round of applause. Bobby. Bobby. Bobby.

Bobby. Put it together. Lee. I fucking love your energy right now, man. Let me say something to you, T. Can I call you T? Yeah, but don't say my name again or otherwise I'm going to have to introduce you.

Yeah. Yeah. The Mirage. The Mirage. Proudly welcome. Bobby Lee. Bobby. I'm glad to see you, my friend.

Last time I saw you, we used to. Remember that period of our lives where we ate a lot of Italian food? Yeah. Yeah. Vagianos. No, there was that Italian restaurant in Detroit. Oh, yeah. That one we went to.

We were going crazy on Italian food. So T and I, we've done a couple of things together. When we were in Detroit, we did that movie, Harold. I wish I could remember the name. Harold and Kumar Christmas people. Christmas people. Yeah, yeah. Harold and Kumar's Christmas people.

Yeah, Christmas people. And that was fun. You were the bravest. I've been in a lot of movies. That's not a brag. That's some of them. And one or two good movies. You had the hardest day I've ever seen anybody put up with on that movie.

There's a scene where Bobby, have you guys seen the picture? Yeah. Yeah. So there's a scene where Bobby gets pelted with eggs. You're running from like. Yeah. And they shot that so many times and it was so brutal. But it was a machine.

Yeah. Made. Yeah. Like a Tommy gun. Yeah. Like a Tommy gun egg machine. Shooting at you. Each egg, it's like having a paintball on it.

I believe in the script. It said it looks like the shot of Charlie Sheen in a platoon. Right. What is just going on? Or is that a poem to foe? I don't know. It was either one. Yeah.

It was either one. You got hit so badly. Yeah. And what happened was. You were a real champ. They go, it's going to sting. I think you can handle it. I go, yeah, dude, it's fucking no, no breather.

I'm a man, bro. No breather. Then they shot you with a machine gun full of eggs. Yeah. And as soon as one hit me. Yeah. It was the most painful thing I've ever felt. Why was it so hard?

So it hit. And I go, oh no, there's 80 more. There's 80 more. And by the way, also like, can you get like Legionnaires disease from just like. Basically they're like, we're going to murder you. Yeah. But we're also going to give you Salmonella on the streets of Detroit. You know what the director did too?

He goes, there's not enough on the face. His own eggs. Yeah. And just started throwing eggs on my head when I'm on the ground. Yeah. Like a bastard. I remember thinking, I remember thinking this is fucked up. Yeah.

And I should say something. But did you fuck? Fuck no. Because I was like, what if they come for me? Right. I was like, when they come for Bobby, that's good time for me to stay low and be like, I don't know him. I don't know him.

And you know, I also work with you on fucking head down. I know that's when you got me to start smoking again because you made it look sexy. I was hanging on here. I know, but you were smoking and I was just looking at you. You got to be very careful because I was out looking at you and you were sitting on a break on the universe a lot and I smoked three packs a day. I smoked a cigarette through my nose. I'll tell you about that later.

I'd have my wisdom teeth pulled. And I was like, don't you dare smoke? And I'm like, all right. So I'm like, joke's on you motherfucker. When I left, I lit a cigarette and went, whoa. So I was that guy. Yeah. Then I quit for a long time.

Yeah. And then I saw you one day and you're just sitting. Here's what you're doing. You're literally just like lounging outside the universe. Yeah. Like pontificating. Oh my God. I love it.

Pontificating. That's how he does it. Yeah. And you're writing out funny letters and stuff. Yeah. And I was like, God, that looks really, that looks fucking appealing. Yeah. And then I bought a cigarette off you.

And then you've been smoked. And then I was like, hey, can I one more later? And then like later I chased your car and I'm like, give me one more. I'm going to murder you. Yeah. And then, uh, then I smoked for a couple years. Oh my God. Then I got hypnotized and I'm great.

I'm really just. I'm so sorry that I hooked back in. It wasn't you. You just made it appealing. And I, when I, you never said like, do this or I'll kill you. Right. But I should have just given you one and let it go. Cool.

Yeah. You didn't smoke anymore. No, I know. We've talked about that before, before we started. It's been a year now. Exactly. It's over a year. Over a year.

Oh yeah. It's been over a year. Um, I know. All right. Because I'm suffering through it. Okay, baby. Um, when I was working on that show, Sean, that's Sean Hayes and it was a sitcom. Oh my God.

You were really funny on that. I know. But can I just say something? Uh huh. I literally like, and I, I, I like white dudes. I do. I think. I don't know.

Just listen. I'm not trying to solve it. I'm real nervous that there's one between me and the door. I mean, not to be. No, but what I'm saying is a real kind of tiki torch looking dude between me and the door. I didn't say that. I mean, you present.

I can't help how you present. I know. He has a tiki torch. You got a slight tiki vibe. I'm just, it's not me. Yeah. It's how you present. To the way you present it.

Yeah. Let's be real. I saw, but what I said was I love white guys. No, I, I know, but I do, but what I'm saying is, is that I get like, when I see some comics and stuff and they're Caucasian, I go, yeah, I got to defeat them or I can be better or I'm better or whatever. Right. Right.

It's just one of those things where it's, it's the way that I can like own up to my ethnicity and find courage and, you know, and, and, and set marks for myself. But when I saw you on that show, I'm not, I'm not, I know you don't probably don't like compliments, but dude. Wait, you said that. So fucking, did someone warn you in advance or like, hey, whatever you do, don't compliment Tom. You are so fucking good, dude.

Thank you. I'm good. I'm really good in small doses, which is why you'll love dog days. Not currently. Oh, you want to segue into the thing you're going to promote? It was a quick one. Are you ready? Yeah.

I'm going to get it. We're not there. No, we're not talking about it yet. Well, I'm doing, I'm going to, the thing is I'm just going to do that like 16 times and then it's cool. Yeah. So dog days is an out and out dog days right now. And when did it?

Friday it came out. Yeah. Wednesday. But you know, you know, Ken Marino from the state. Yeah. The big, the handsome Italian. Yeah. Yeah.

I love them. Yeah. Ken directed it. Wow. Yeah. So it's a little funnier than you might expect. Right. And it's a, it's, is there obviously dogs in it?

There's nothing but dogs in it. I saw the poster tone bells in it. Right. Yes. Tom Bell is totally in it. Oh, I love Tom. Yeah. I saw the poster.

Yeah. Yeah. So are you any of those legs? I'm the, I'm the, the, the khakis. How you are? As you can tell by the incredible bulge. Yeah. Oh.

Yeah. Again, he's looking at me now. So the dog is, is out and have you saw the movie obviously? Yeah. It's hilarious. You love it. It's very funny movie. Yeah.

It's a sweet movie. Now there's, sometimes there's movies that like my in-laws in Ohio don't want to see that I'm in. Right. That's most of my uvra. You know? Yeah. It's either, you know, like in bad teacher, like just my wieners on the Xerox machine.

Something stupid's happening, but this is the one, this is actually like a fun movie that like people can go see. Great. And they won't hate you later. Yeah. Well, we, I love dogs and I, I do. I obviously have three. Yeah.

In fact, we have a picture of our dog in front of one of the, you know, those, the bench. Oh, cute. Yeah. I got to show it to you. Wait, wait. You have a photo of one of our dogs in front of his dog days poster? Yeah. All you do?

Yeah. Oh, that's amazing. Julio. I love Julio so much. Julio is in front of him. Julio is the sort of salt and pepper. No, Julio is all brown. Julio is the little, uh, little brown crazy one.

You have what? You have dogs? I got two dogs, Heidi and Pedro. You know what? Yeah. What's up? And I know I don't want to get in. I don't want to get deep into it, but.

I want to get nothing but deep into it. But here, you know, and it's so funny because I'm thinking of today, I was thinking. I'm going to pee in this jar while you talk. But today I was thinking. No, no, no. No, no, no. I was thinking what, what, what, what happened at my encounters with Thomas? And I'm going to tell you, I remember all the encounters I've had with you.

Okay. What are, what was the first one? You'll probably never remember. I bet. Margeanos. Was it Margeanos little Italy? Yeah. Over there on the right.

And you were there with a lot of family. Yeah. Yeah. Do you remember that or not? Maybe. Yeah. Yeah. I remember because you said hi to me.

Yeah. And at that point, I didn't really know who you were. And then later I researched and then I felt guilty for not being more friendly to Thomas. So that was my first encounter with him and that must have been 15 years ago. Okay. Well, now let me say my side of that. I was so excited to see you. I'm like, oh my God, there's Bobby Lee.

I'm going to act like a big wheel in front of my huge family and be like, look, here's one of my hundreds of Korean standup comedy friends. And this is just like, this could be any night. Right. And I'm like, oh, hey, Bobby. Yeah. Hi. And then you look to me and you're like, who's this Tiki torch guy?

I don't know him. I don't need to be. I don't. Oh, I'm blushing. I'm blushing. But you're like, no, here's now I'm sad because I'm like, oh boy, you acted like you're like, oh yeah, that's Tom. He's cool.

Yeah. And then I felt guilty. And then here's another encounter I remember. Right. Yeah. El Cholo. Yeah. And you were eating with your wife and one of your kids, I think.

And I remember the kid in a Hollywood Halloween. My wife family or my other family? Well, you have a black family as well. Spoiler alert. Do you remember that? Of course. No. Well, I don't remember that that well.

But did you? Oh, no, no, I do. We're in the back of a little room. Exactly. And were you, you were out? Pull your ears. Yeah. Pull your ears.

Where you want to take? I think it was a different girl. That's fine. You guys were literally making love. No, we weren't doing that. No way. It was just so much. It doesn't hurt me.

I've been covering poker photos. It was like the Kamasutra. Yeah. Guacamole flying. And it was dangerous because you had one of those open fajita plates next to you. And just, just, oh God. Yeah. That's when I told my son.

I'm like this. I'm glad that Bobby is making love on the next table. Because you had to learn about this at some point. So you don't remember? No, I do remember that. Yeah. I do remember that. And I was like, Bobby, I haven't seen you since Detroit.

Yeah. And you're like, and then that was that. And then, and I'm going to just tell you my next experience with you, but you weren't in it. You weren't around. Okay. But I was, I was watching. You're watching 17 again.

Yeah. I was watching. You know, I rarely go out to the movies to watch anything. And I generally don't watch comedies because, because it's not fun. Don't get high in your own supply. Exactly. Watch horror. And then you watch action movies sometimes.

Yeah. Are you the same way? And snuff. Yeah. That's exactly him. Yeah. Have you ever bought a ticket to see another comedy that you weren't in? It's been a little bit.

Yeah. Yeah. But of course I have. There's something about Mary is the last one I saw. Come on. There's got to be another one. I saw Kingpin before that. That's not true because Best in Show came out after that.

Yeah. I saw that on DVD. Oh. No, we're talking about in the theater. In the theater, like buying a ticket. I thought that you were in the theater for some reason. Because the other thing about being in comedies like dog days, which is in theaters right now, is can I ask this about you when you see a comedy and any friend of yours is in

the theater? Do you just quietly go? Fuck them. Fuck. It's not even that. Fuck. It's not even that. That girl.

I'm a much funnier waiter. I also go into myself. Uh-huh. So when I'm watching, I laugh. Oh, JoJo's in it. In my head? Mm-hmm. And I'll be like, what the fuck have you been doing?

Yeah. You didn't read for that? No, of course. This is exactly what I do. Yeah. You had an audition. You didn't read for it. Yeah.

And this is you. You fucked your own life up. Okay. So there is a movie that my friend John Hamburg made called Why Him? Yeah. And there was a character in it called Gustav the Man-Servant? Yeah. And I was like, I'm like, oh my God.

And he's like, so Tom, I was kind of thinking about you when I read the movie. And he's like, I'd love for you to come in just, you know, gets political, just come in and read for Gustav the Man-Servant. And I'm like, ah, yeah. I do some of it in German. Yeah. And I'm frolicking around. And I've got like a, like the exact right, like weird tank top shirt on.

Yeah. I'm like, I've been Gustav the Man-Servant. Felt like I nailed it. Wrestling him on the ground. It was amazing. Yeah. I don't hear anything for a long time. Yeah.

And then he sends me an email because we're pals. He's like, oh, we're going a different way. And I'm like, oh, we're going a different way with the role that I was kind of in your head. Yeah. And then I see the trailer for the movie. And it's like one of my, probably my favorite living actor. It's Keegan-Michael Key.

Wow. But like, so then you just go down a rabbit hole. So this is why you can't go see comedies. Yeah. Because you're just like, well, that's great casting, son of a bitch. And he's got funny mutton jobs. You do have. Ever have bad auditions?

I feel like you don't. No, I've tanked some stuff for sure. And how you, because I have, I mean, I know I've talked about a lot in this podcast, but yeah. And I wanted to talk to him about it because I have PTSD from some of them. Sure. Like they're so terrible. Yeah.

That I had one front of Amy Poehler once where I was so bad that I hit my head over a water ball when I was walking into my car and I bled from my head. Oh my God. Like I abused myself. I got one for you. And this is a weird deep cut, but it was during parks and rec, they sometimes will bring in other actors just to fail so that they can show the studio that they're positive about it.

And I'm pretty sure I read for Nick Offerman's role, but like most of the people in charge of the show didn't even come. It was just like a, like we had got to turn some people through. I got some lambs to the slaughter. Did you know that going in or not? I did not know that going in. I was just like, the world is mine. Yeah.

Yeah. And then they're like, oh no, no, no, they wrote this very specifically for someone else. You're not that person. You are not getting it. Wow. But everyone's small. I had a friend who had a sitcom and I'll just say it. I'm not going to say the person or what the sitcom is, but this person had a sitcom

and everyone read for it. And eventually I started saying out loud, I can't fucking read for that. Yeah. I mean, yeah, this person's my friend. Yeah. And then I know they casted the part, right? But I get called in for it anyway. No.

Yeah. I'm in a room with no producer, just an intern with a camera. Yeah. Yeah. And I just, I'm literally, once I show up, I already know what it is. Yeah. And the other one, they're like, no. Well, I could do another one.

No. You know what? It was great. Yeah. Did you even get it? Yeah. It was great. And that was like heart fucking breaking.

Yeah. But you know what? I've heard, I once heard them closing Will Arnett's deal through the door. Before you came in, it was just like, I was like, oh, they're like, oh my God, literally tell Will, we will do anything, anything, as long as he does it. Yeah. Great. Yes.

It's Role of Gary. It's 18 days in Vancouver. Yeah. It's the stuff. Favorite nations. Yeah. I just don't want to see anybody. Favorite nations.

Oh, hi, Tom. Come on in. Break a leg. And they're like, oh. Okay. And where do they come up with the terminology? Like if you have a good idea. Favorite nations?

Or yeah, favorite nations. Or they put a pin in it. A pin in you. I don't know what that means. Put a pin in you. They put a pin. What does that mean? Yeah.

No, they put a pin in you means we want someone else. What if that falls through? You're the next option. You are. You're either the backup or like the second backup. I've been pinned so many times. Getting pinned. Right.

Right. So somebody made that up. By the way, they also, here's one for you. They're just checking your avails. This stains. Because you'll be like, people will be like, hey, checking your avails for August. You know, 26, 27, 28. Oh yeah, I'm available.

Okay. And they're like, hey, remember when like, uh, yeah, remember when that cool thing was calling and checking my avails? I'm still avail. Was that? Oh yeah. Like what? Have a guy.

Yeah. Yeah. They're like, oh no, no, no, no, that's not. Yeah. I'm afraid to call. So when they go, you check their avails, they put a pin in you. Put a pin. Yeah.

And then you, and then it's getting closer to August 28th where that, you know, you cleared it. And do you go, do I call and go, hey, what's up with that? Am I just going to get a call sheet tomorrow? Yeah. Yeah. Do I just, I wake up and I go there? Yeah.

I just wait for the 28th and I'm just not in Vancouver. I'll do you. I'll do you on Bobby. Not only can I not go see comedies because it's always a tiny bit sad. Yeah. Because like all you're going to be reminded is, yeah, Rob Hubbell's a genius. Did I? All right.

Yeah. Nick Kroll can do almost anything. Right. Fuck it. Yeah. That's how I felt about you on Sean Saves the World. I've already sat there and watched you rehearse and I said to myself, yeah, I should get out because whatever he just did, I can't do that.

I mean, you were just, it was a rehearsal. You had all the lines memorized. I didn't have very many lines. That's another secret. And then you were like going in and out of this like little secret, be a side dish. Like I am in dog days, which is out in theaters. Why? I'm going to nine at the minimum.

Keep doing it. I'll give you a fuck. Keep doing it. It's a secret. Oh, and you're a side dish. Yeah. Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum. You're aware of kimchi, right?

I love it. Yeah. Yeah. Of course I'm aware of it. Yeah. Yeah. Sometimes my Korean friends, sometimes you have two fridges, one for kimchi. Do you have Korean friends?

Yes, I do. How many? How many do you have? Three. What are their names? John Cho. Oh, he is a friend. Yes.

Bobby Lee. Yeah. And Kathy Shim. I know Kathy too. Kathy's married to my writing partner. Tell Kathy I said hi. You don't have to. You have a podcast.

Hi, Kathy. I'm telling her right now. Hi, Kathy. I love Kathy. Easy. No, she's great. I work with her. Of course.

I know she's married to my writing partner. So when I was, I bought a ticket for an action movie and I was looking for it. It was one of those movies where I went, you know, you know how like Hereditary was the movie for two months I was waiting to see. Yeah. Is it great? This other movie was one. It was, I loved it.

I saw it twice. Great. So scary. I've very seldom seen a movie twice. It's a representation of Christ. And I love that movie. Weirdly. I saw it twice.

I don't know why. I think that movie had nothing to do and I was like 20. Yeah. Yeah. It, that movie really is when you watch it though. It is really emotional. And the, and violence. And the Gabriel music.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Everybody's got wieners out. The movie was. Maybe that's why. Dark Knight. Dark Knight.

The movie that I went to see. Dark Knight Rises. No, no, no. The second one. The movie that you're in. The third one. That one. Oh yeah.

Dark Knight Rises. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. With Bane. Yeah. With Bane. Yeah.

And I'm sitting there in the, are you, you're not in the second one? No, I'm in the third one. You're in the third one. Yeah. And I'm, I'm sitting there in the theater and when you came on as the doctor. Yeah. The place went crazy. When I turned around.

Because I think it was partly because it was unexpected to see Thomas Lennon. Too much tension. There's a lot of tension going in. Right. There's a lot that, you know, yeah, yeah. He scales to see. Oh, everything's murder. He scales to see Gary Oldman.

Right. Who's maybe dying. Maybe dying. Right. So when you turned around. Like hello. Like the fact that I don't have like a bubblegum cigar or like a beanie. But you had worked with him before Christopher Nolan.

A memento. A memento. Right. Yeah. Which is a great picture if you haven't seen it. Oh, one of the best. It's memento's great. Memento's a trip.

Yeah. So when you're working with someone. Cause I've seen him over at the. Oaks. Oaks. You know. When I was a kid. Yeah.

I don't say anything because I just get so intimidated, but. Yeah. Um, do you. I'm intimidated about him too. Yeah. That's what I'm saying. But he's actually a funny sweet guy. That day when you were working or a couple of days, whatever.

90 minutes. That 90 minutes that you were working. Not only does he not slow down on movies. He actually drops days out of the schedule because he starts to speed up the more the faster he goes. So the more he makes a movie, the less days it takes, which is crazy. Incredible. But it's very true.

He doesn't like have a trailer and he doesn't like usually have monitors. He's just like on his feet. Making the movie. It's really impressive. He doesn't have anything where he can see something back. Maybe he does. Uh, to my knowledge, I've just been around him and he just like films it like a movie. Like.

Wow. Kind of like, like Clint Eastwood also does the same thing. Yeah. He's just there like, and he's, there's a camera guy and. Well, I mean, I'm sure for the big stunts sequences, he looks at monitors and stuff. But for me, you get with Christopher Nolan, you also get like two takes. Wow. You know, a third, if you really fucked up the second one, but probably not.

Now we knowing this. Yeah. Is it very scary? Are you nervous? Oh my God. I couldn't sleep for days. I had the, I had one page of dialogue, which is all I say in Dark Knight Rises. And it, someone hand delivered it to my house like four months before shooting.

Wow. And I had a paper so you couldn't quite, you couldn't Xerox it. Right. And everything other than what I say was redacted with a big black marker. So I didn't know who I was talking to. Well, except that I said, well, Mr. Wayne. Yeah. If I didn't say, oh, Mr. Wayne, there was no way to know like, I could be talking to anybody.

Right. So when you're getting that delivery, they got hand delivered and a guy handed it to me. And I was like, imagine. I was like, this was really exciting. I was like, do I need to like sign something? And the guy looked at me and he went. No.

Just like, if this page fell in the wrong hands, you're dead already. A lot. Yeah. It was very exciting. So, but imagine having, you know, it's like a little paragraph and then a tiny little paragraph and then you have four months to think about it. I'm sweating as that. Yeah.

I'm the time. I can't. Mr. Wayne. Yeah. So now let me, let me. So now your day off. Hello, Mr. Wayne. Where's the shot?

Chicago? You ready for this? Yeah. This is one of those times they're like, Hey, Christopher Nolan would like you to play this little part. It's basically a cameo in The Dark Knight Rises. The movie shooting in downtown Los Angeles, which is basically where I live. Yeah.

You know, not that fun. Oh, I mean fun. Obviously. Downtown Los Angeles, India, Pittsburgh and London. And I was like, my fucking luck. I'm going to get downtown Los Angeles. Right. So you flew to London.

Wow. Yes. So you flew to London. You got to fly. You got to get a work permit. You got to go to a wardrobe fitting. You got to go back to the hotel. You got to eat spaghetti, which you know, I love to do.

Oh, you know, I love being on. So you're in London. London. Right. In a nice hotel. Crazy thing. I was in this hotel and then like a fleet of women in burkas moved into the second floor who were obviously with some like Saudi prince or something.

Yeah. Yeah. And they asked that I be removed from the floor. I literally came up one night in my hotel, lovely hotel. Yeah. The Langham in London. And I have the worst room and there's all these ladies with like Louis Vuitton suitcases all the way down the hall.

It's just steamer trunks and just like burkas, but with, you know, like Jimmy Chews and like $5, $10,000 shoes. And everybody looks at me quietly and I'm like, what just happened? Some weird just happened. And then I go back to my room. And then later that night, there's a message from the manager who's like, Mr. London, one of our guests needs the whole second floor. You, I'm so sorry.

Yeah. We have to move you to one of the penthouse suites without be okay. And I'm like, I believe just to see. Yeah. I was like, yeah, that was going to work. And then I did nothing in the movie. Right. Could barely remember my lines because I've known them for four months.

Oh, hi, Mr. Batman. Will you show up though? Yeah. Now, did you know Christian Bale before that? I did not. So you're in now, where do you see him at the, in the makeup trailer or? I don't. Yeah.

Yeah. No, the makeup people, I'm sure he's in some other makeup right situation. So you're on set and then he shows up. Yeah. And he comes in and the thing that's disconcerting is he's also, you know, his big handsome guy. Yeah. But then he's also like very mellow and funny. Yeah.

Like I can see that. Yeah. And you also, you know, you forget he also talks like this. Yeah. So like sometimes you'll see me, he comes in and he's like Batman. Yeah. And he's like, oh, hey, yeah, it's all right. So, you know, I'm Christian.

I'm Christian. I'm going to Batman. You know? And you're like, oh, you're just like a kind of a sweet kind of cocky. Yeah. I'm the Batman, you know? So when you, when you come in, I'll be on Bruce. And then you, you'll be my doctor.

Right. And he's like, it's just like a record. He's telling you what the suit is. Yeah. I'm kidding. But that's so funny. But he's very unassuming and he's a funny dude. Yeah.

I'm going to say this. I think maybe you weren't intimidated, but I think it makes it easier though that you were already in memento. Yes. I don't know if you knew that. I don't know if there's a way to say that. Like, hey, Christian, how's it going? No, but not Christian, but in front of at least Mr. Nolan.

Hey, everybody. I think I've made a joke like once every 13 years, we'll make a movie. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Well, he's the greatest. He makes great movies. He is one of the greatest directors. Even Don Kirk was, I've seen it twice. Crazy. I love that movie. I just recently watched, here's a crazy thing about, oh my God, I just recently watched Dark Knight.

Holy crap. I know. The middle one. Yeah. Oh my God. It's amazing. But they're all great, but that's the second one. Oh my God.

It also begins. Begins. Begins is great too. What's happening? Yeah. That movie's so cool. So good. And to see what happened after that with the fucking Justice League, what fucking happened?

I haven't seen it. Well, I'm going to tell you what it is. Okay, tell me about it. Because I actually don't know. I loved Wonder Woman. That was great. That was great. That was the only one.

And I'm going to say this, okay, is that Marvel has a franchise. They do light. A lot of colors. They're now built like comedies. Yes. A lot of very funny jokes. Oh my God. Thor.

One of the funniest movies of the year. From the very beginning when he's in the chains and he's just like, I'll be right back around with you. It's so funny. So as a, I'm not a big comic book, but I know, I think they should have used Christopher Nolan's movies as a foundation and said, we're going to play this shit real and gritty, you know, and we're going to, since they're doing the funny, we're going to do the real. But they didn't do that.

They made it very glossy. Have you ever seen those movies? Yeah. No. There's like, there's a glow about things, you know, and the CGI is funky. The CGI looks weird. It's humorous, lifeless. And I've never even sat through the whole thing on these fucking things.

I'll like leave or turn it off or whatever. They're fucking. God. It was really funny in like, in Dark Knight. Yeah. The thing with the pencil. That's how you meet. That's how you meet him.

It's fucking. He basically comes in and he's like, there you go. Yeah. Yeah. That was crazy. And his death also got rest of soul and rest in peace. Okay. I don't know why I'm doing this.

You were kind of doing like. I don't know. I was kind of weird. It was weird. I had a vaping. Yeah. I wasn't doing really anything. No, you were showing everyone my vaping.

Yeah. You like it? But that also, his death makes, he makes that movie also very tough to get around. It gives it an extra level of like mystery. You know, right? Yeah. It'll never, it was like a Tibetan mandala. You'll never get it again in any way.

Tibetan mandala. Yeah. Tibetan mandala. Love you just made fun of how I said that. I feel like that's how you say that. That is the way you're saying it. Tibetan mandala. Yeah.

So you have Tommy. Dog days is in the kitchen house. Dog days, yeah. You go right down to the arc light. You say, I want the, I want the wine, the movie pour of wine. Yeah. And a giant pretzel and wiener. Yeah.

And then you enjoy the dog days. It's a great picture. Baby, we should see it this week then. Look at Julio. I actually think you will love it. Yeah. Was that Julio by the poster dog days? So there's Julio with the poster dog days.

And look. It's adorable. Cackies. That's tea. That's where you go. Is that you? You can tell by the definition. Balls, balls, bro.

It's not me, guys. It's not me. It's not you? Which one is it? You're not any in any of these? I technically would be probably just to the side of those people. Technically. Right.

Like I'm the guy who's like right next to the, oh yeah, yeah. I'm just cropped out. You cropped out. Yeah. I just barely cropped out on the other side. Is there a guy in the movie with a skateboard? Oh, for sure. Adam Paley has a skateboard.

Oh, I don't know. Finn Wolfhard Bobbie, you know, from... Stranger Things? Yeah, he's got a... Yeah, yeah. Which we refuse to watch. I can't watch it. Not much Stranger Things, you weirdo.

Please go go and do it. I auditioned for the, and I've said this before and I'll say it again. Oh it's okay. This is why we can't watch anything. Bobby, we've now painted ourselves into a corner. I know. Where we have so much hatred. And then they, they, they, they liked me a lot.

They called me a lot. They liked me for my avails twice. They called me a lot. They liked me for my avails twice. Oh, they pinned me five times. They pinned me five times. They pinned, prevailed. which character for the teacher teacher and the first see actually he's also in

the second season son of a bitch you made it to both seasons yeah yeah and then I auditioned the second year second season because they liked the first and I just didn't I was so didn't bring it because in the first one your own worst it was called something else and it was just an audition it was called Montauk and I just went in and I just kind of went I don't know what this is I was fucking read it yeah right any when you don't but now it's a cultural thing imagine now you're sitting yeah you're in the lobby like I have to kill it yeah and with that in it nah I can't do it I know you know what I usually do by the

way and you can have this I usually walk in and I just look right at everybody and I'm like I'm gonna pass based on the material it's great and then everybody just goes yeah what if I said that before you that would suck I read before you pass based on the material so many rooms get a lab and you go in there and you do it you know what Bobby does this and he really destroys it you know that's that's a classic Bobby Jeff yeah yeah Bobby's been doing that for years how do you that's the other big bummer is when you walk into the the waiting room and you see all your doppelgangers you've got some right oh my

god yeah I got your and I've got some that are just I love their work yeah that that look who when you go into a room who do you see who do I hate to see no who do you generally see I'll see your Andy dailies I Andy daily for sure yeah don't call genius yeah yeah I'll see your rubbubles I'll see your oh I'll see your John Michael Higgins alive yeah Higgins yeah he and I both have that kind of like bon vivant like angry authoritarian who might also like be in the dog rooming yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah a bit of a dandy you know yeah I see the you know I see sometimes Steven youn twice sure right yeah I'm 30 years

older than him and it's like people white people can't tell we just can't yeah I mean I live when he walks into a room I literally turn and go should I leave but there's no way I'm gonna get this but he's just heartbreaking drama guy but he's any yeah but he's from second city he changed it yeah yeah and he's very funny no he is he's a wonderful guy yeah and a kind of a dreamboat do you know him no I'm a little bit I know Malone we met like twice and he was great he's just one of the nicest yeah he was just great but but now a lot of those guys you know have of they're ahead of me now no so like the Randall parks the Don

John chose although they're my class of people I don't see them because they're the they're the leads and I'm still getting like you know the Chinese waiter yeah or you know you're not really yeah or the for Europe yeah for Europe they don't know yeah that might be yeah yeah I was actually okay so I was at walking around the Paramount lot I had to do something there so I took my son I just had to kill some time out at Paramount we walked around the whole lot and they were filming on the back lot and I was like filming and there's like a nice P is like come on watch and I'm like oh cool I'm like what is this and

she's like it's a lucky strike commercial and I'm like what she's like the cigarettes yeah I was like oh this is just not for America she's like no not for America no so that like there's stuff that exists yeah world is very small when you go to like when you go to like Japan you'll see you know de Caprio with a watch yeah you know I mean in a Rolex you'll see Brad Pitt selling oil but sometimes whatever there was an old Woody Allen like whiskey ad and stuff but it's all overseas yeah yeah why is that due to do big A-list actors go I don't want to be seen in a certain way in America some of the guys

with the watch they don't even put it on it's just like near them right they're like for me in the Philippines everything all the beers and all the rums were Steven Segal his line was I found gold in the Philippines and Steven Segal is the biggest thing growing up that's just all you saw was Steven Segal you mean Steven Segal special Russian envoy to the United States I've met Steven Segal twice and the only thing I know about this motherfucker is he loves to say namaste by the way so do I this is something shitty white people love to do so do I yeah it's like my favorite thing you see even when I don't say

namaste yeah I just go like this just to show that I'm the duchiest right but dude do you think Steven Segal only says namaste in front of Asians or you think it does that in front of other just regular just anyone anybody Bobby first of all you've distinguished Asians from regular people which you did that that's insane yeah that shows how fucked up the system but on behalf of regular people I really do understand that but so I'm not trying to downplay Asians I think we're more evolved probably so that's why I said yeah well Chinese people probably are yeah they made up all the they made up fireworks and

stuff quality nicely yeah yeah I want to talk about Tom Tom yeah I want to talk about odd couple mmm yeah and number one mm-hmm it was one of those shows it was after Sean saves the world correct yes right probably Sean saves the world probably led to me meeting on odd couple probably cuz I was like they're both NBC well it's really hard to be like a main character in a TV show if you have not been that before anywhere else ah it's hard yeah yeah like it like they don't want you the lists are tiny of like we can you here's there's three people that can be in everything right and it's really hard so Sean saves the world

while not a hit in any way did open doors for me a little bit too like okay you're sort of allowed to be on something else now right you know which was nice but yeah I mean I did the show air it aired right a couple yeah we did three half seasons which was a very strange thing yeah that was that's anything that was the thing about it we would do like a half a season and then hang around for a little bit no do half season and another half a season yeah but they contractually can have you for three if it's a half a season three years of your life it was say probably door-to-door was probably was very close to three years

in my right yeah so then they they could just hold you like do yes thirteen episodes and hold you for a year yes yeah sure do and do they pay you for the off no not only do they not pay you they don't but they the the upside is generally they pay you a lot when you do it uh-huh you know so like if you bitch and moan about it you're an asshole right yeah so that was a weird yeah that was a really weird thing because it both really kind of kept me from doing like you know at some point Ben and I'll probably do another like weird like Reno 9 one type thing I'd be great um and it but it kept me out of that arena

for a long time yeah and you know doing have you ever watched you've watched Ricky Gervais's extras yeah that's a couple of it that was really interesting because in the second season he does a show that he becomes famous for yeah but he's not necessarily super proud of it the guy the guy goes yeah and the couple felt a little bit like that sometimes yeah where I was like no friend of mine had ever seen it to my knowledge like ever but what was I was hiding in plain sight for years yeah I know I knew about it thank you because I would hear we're also pretty good friends yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah but um what

was Matthew like uh without getting it you know no you know yeah he's his own probably we toughest critic and yeah you know he's very he's a passionate guy he's a pat and I I've met him many a couple times before and I like him no he's a good dude and it was always you know he takes it very seriously and he created that show yeah he was very passionate about it and honestly I think if we'd been on like slightly earlier in the evening yeah it probably would have run much longer than it did yeah because you two together would have been I in my head I thought was a no-brainer we had a nice we we clicked well it's weird

because we actually have we have them like one like we have a mutual ex-girlfriend yeah who's like a major girlfriend in his life and my life wow yeah our friend I can say her name is Gabby but she was a second no but uh so it was really funny and then Gabby came to a taping like of the show and she brought like her whole family and Gabby married now yeah she's married with kids and everything and she's a success and does a lot of stuff has been an actor no he's a director but they all came to the show and it was just like a really weird moment oh wow that's weird here's all of mom's ex-boyfriends living in a fake

apartment in New York City yeah bickering fake bickering in a fake apartment you have one or two kids now I have one child yeah yeah he seems so happy with his cool he's a cool kid I like him yeah the weird thing about kids is they don't there's no way to prepare you for how much you will like the one that you have because other people's kids seem like a real pain yeah this is one why I can hear I think yeah this I honestly I really I honestly I want one you should do it do it right now do it right now do it right now the reason why the reason why is because when I see dudes like this right we'll do no just

like talented you know comics and comedian guys well actors I know and he can do it and the times I've seen him with this kid it seems like fun you know it tell me great whenever I see you with my kid obviously game face I'm gonna keep it together keep it together this is one of dad's one of dad's three Korean friends you fucking blow this for me you're done yeah you understand me yeah so obviously we're putting on a game face when we see you up to it is really fun three well as I was on my way over here tonight at 8 30 p.m. I was like who is up this late ever right that doesn't happen anymore get ready it's a

big difference wait so shit like this when you sleep rowing out you sleep at 9 at night I sleep like things that really wind down at our house by 10 it's very quiet yeah maybe we do need a kid now this is really interesting yes before you had a kid yes what was your schedule like oh my god soups casual I could also when pre-kids I could sleep basically like 11 hours a night then I would take a 90 minute nap yeah I was just a human kitty cat one I was talking to a girlfriend of mine who when I first moved to Los Angeles one night we went to that restaurant the stinking rose yeah as a joke we were like fuck it

let's go to the stinking rose you know why cuz we have nothing to do ever and I look at you guys with the three dogs yeah it's God bless you I mean it's it's really different like tomorrow like what's what's the morning like you probably have a gig in the evening or something I have a table read at one at Warner Brothers and I have I'll probably leave the house at noon yeah but time you actually go to bed I'll go to bed at five in the morning see that's insane it's not but you also just had by the way I'd also yeah I know the response but you had a sugar-free Red Bull at nine o'clock this is some

bullshit that's gonna change yeah you know what I think that I want I think you don't know you gotta do it you gotta do it yeah yeah I want to change wait just from drinking Red Bull it now that's not that hard I'm almost 50 Bob you're not almost 50 are you 46 I thought you were about the same age as Steven Young for fucking 25 years I've just been sleeping at five in the morning right it will just shoots and I like my eyes are all crossed oh it'll make you a better person it will just not as happy right yeah so I mean you'll be yeah you'll be like having an amazing time but you'll be doing a lot of dumb

stuff that you don't want to do all right you'll be mostly just standing around at people's birthday parties for the rest of your life right yeah you're not selling it like you're not selling it no no it's amazing yeah yeah like you cry that amazing you cry a lot and they remind you of you all right right right and then occasionally they do something cool and neat and then sometimes they're just a dick yeah usually it's pretty cool and let me you have to you have to admit though like when you're when you work out of town yeah you come back home and you go to the house on your dad is your son is excited to see you I'm

guessing you and your wife have stable genetics Bobby and I we are a hundred percent producing some type of serial killer or psychopath well have you let's mmm that's a good possibility there's murder on both sides okay family like family gathering stabbings they happen at family gathering okay so the kids gonna be an alpha of some kind yeah it's not gonna be they're not gonna be a weak child boy or girl what it skips a generation baby that's what I heard stabbings they're gonna cut it's us oh it did skip us because we're we're relatively stable yeah so it's gonna go to our kids right it's really not the

only thing to go to your kids is all the weird shit that you can't help that you do around them raw yeah you got to be careful with sarcasm and stuff yeah sarcasm is really dangerous right kids will say almost anything you say right back to them wow and I want to breathe with you baby because I'm romantic you did say breed which was really weird but I want to procreate with you baby because I'm sexier um you're you're a bright you're bright kids are pretty fun they actually are pretty fun and by the way perfect time if you don't really sleep that much now it's perfect because you find that you'll be up at nine it's

really weird but it's like kind of fun it's like a free drug that you are on that makes you cry and keeps you awake yeah so you cry and it keeps you awake and then you feel shitty oh in the first couple of years yeah you also eat stuff you don't want to eat because you're endlessly at somebody's fucking birthday party literally there's these like pizzas birthdays you go to oh my god get ready bro yeah once you start school yeah you got to keep in mind so there's like preschool and then you have all the preschool friends and then you move on to grade school and then there's grade school friends fucking you're just

on a birthday rotation oh my you just keep a bin of like weird presents why do you have to go you do have to go unless sometimes you really have a lot of writing you got to do right or you're very sick those are the only real options well you're generally you're working out of town you obviously yeah exactly but you have a new face time but when you're working out of town you got to act like you're sad because like oh right if you're up in Vancouver for like a couple weeks like making a movie yeah yeah and then people are like people call you from LA on FaceTime you got to be like oh god it's the worst day of my

life up here literally is probably the worst day of my entire life like what you do is like wow we had a scene and then I was done and then I went to yoga everything but it was just it's hell it's never probably coming out yeah yeah wow that's a great thing when you're on the road well if I have a kid I'm gonna have I'm gonna come to you know I'm gonna be with I'm gonna hang out with you from bed you're gonna give me notes yeah and I'll know all the rules yeah the only thing about being a parenting it is also not really that hard everything that you need to know reveals itself immediately yeah yeah like oh don't let

them fall off the thing yeah I don't leave your random blood pressure pills right right right have you done that yes for the dogs or dogs blood pressure bills one of our cats OD'd on your Benadryl no it was unisom wait the fact that if a cat had overdosed on Benadryl I don't know if that's irony but the cat that took too much allergy medicine is full-blown insanity that's that's like a human centipede yeah it took one of my kittens at the time you don't know just don't leave drugs generally around around right or loose at all but I feel like even you do know that as a grown-up man yeah yeah I had to

do pass codes on my pass codes on my iPad because I have all this like stuff on it look go all this like stuff on it yeah you got you got real dodgy when you look around called Older's for Youngers what is this now baby older's for younger whether you're an older or a younger or baby I don't want to know about that I feel like you he should know yeah but I have this weird this secret is honest I have this weird porn obsession of course of older man and younger women okay I'm talking about 90 year old decrepit like on the verge of death okay that's super super gross and kind of a bummer yeah but this is this

is the slippery slope you go down with pornography right I talked about this once where it's like hey you know I thought that like fetish used to mean like fishnet pantyhose right that's not at all not at all it's just people pooping in the hat yeah and then someone has to wear that and the whole thing yeah yeah the the the suggestions that come up on websites are weird yeah but your thing really really bugs me a lot why is it so it's guys who look like Stanley oh yeah is Stanley in any of them and the other are like so Stanley form and from a fresh fresh professional okay what you're talking about is

crimes I mean it's fun to be here okay I know you're kidding yeah of course what it is and here's what it is and I'm gonna say so I'm gonna explain to everyone right now listening okay yeah I don't want people to get out of control right it is I'm not into mm-hmm when I see the old man I see me because I feel like I'm old and I feel like I'm not sexy and so when I see you know me an older dude I don't think this got better yeah actually it actually it was one of these horrible things where it was kind of vague and then it got more specific and it actually got way yeah so you're saying there's no proper Asian

representation in American porn see that's another thing it's like there's never have you ever seen an American porn and seen some Asian dude you know I mean oh no you're right yeah cuz I always have to chuck noodle you know chuck noodle chuck noodle's not in it yeah porn stuff yeah Frank dumpling is not in it if Frank dumpling was rolling up there's I mean it's a fat Chinese guy yeah with just some regular girl I would I would download and I would be I support like crazy rich Asians yeah like awesome Kira right it's always she's always with some dude that looks like you know yeah Josh Brolin I got a real

question for you Bobby it feels like you're really focusing on the dudes a lot I mean I don't want to I'm not I don't want it to peel his onion like a tongue but I'm like well she's fine but why doesn't this guy look like Stan Lee why is this guy not a Korean Stan Lee who's about to die with an oxygen tube otherwise so yeah you're right you know I feel like I mean I mean what does it matter I need it does it doesn't matter because if you if there's a penis in the scene uh-huh right yeah and people are doing things to the penis right and you I can't ignore the fact that there is penile in it and so you know it's like

you put yourself in that man's you know he's basically playing yourself okay you know talking yeah it's not like I want to suck it okay right it's more like that's me no I understand it's wish fulfillment right yeah but it's not so you don't go to POV stuff because you got to see the weird old gentleman I hate POV yeah I can't do POV you like you hate POV what why why that why that face George no but I don't like the angles of it yeah right it's like you know I saw one POV what you just see a girl's belly button in her moth you know you can't see the hole you can't see the whole Stan Lee

he's cropped out he's cropped out Lisa mattresses whether you're 105 what are we at we're at over 50 that's amazing so at the end of our podcast you know dog days you want to plug it again yeah dog days is a lighthearted movie has nothing to do with the last several minutes of the podcast not really it's a hilarious movie it I think if you like dogs what you guys do I think you might you might really love it it's a very heartwarming movie ever lay with some beautiful sleepers sleepers listen to me okay yeah I'm talking to my fan the people listening yeah you know tea tea London here I love this guy I love you

back and he's talented guy and I think we should all we owe it to ourselves to to buy some tickets for dog thanks buddy I also want people to buy tickets to crazy rich Asians as well what if they could only buy one ticket what do they buy dog days dog days first how is crazy rich Asians I'm not in it I don't see it but cuz it's gonna make you mad well I want you to go to dog days just cuz you'll see my part and you'll be like yeah yeah yeah I would love to see dog days but the reason why crazy rich Asians and she's my girlfriend changed my mind about it in my head like fuck Ken's in it Jimmy O. Yang's in it

they've all done our podcast Jimmy O. Yang awkward they've all done it and I love these kids they're beautiful kids yeah very talented right yeah and but when I tried to read for it they were like nah right but you're so not Chinese that's true there's everybody in the movie Chinese either is Ken John Ken is actually the only non-Chinese Nico Santos Filipino oh he is yes so in your face a can of worms but then Colada goes it's the first Asian comedy all cast Asian comedy that's American of its kind it's a studio movie and it's got to do well in the box office and in turn it'll help everyone yeah what the you

know there's a great expression that I like which is a rising tide lifts all ships my great expression Thomas don't reason to cry dog days I mean it's not great expression I know when the tide comes in all the ships all the ships even the ship's a rising tide yeah even even if the ships have some of your absolute enemies on them that doesn't comedy and it right right that's the end of that expression is yeah some of those ships hopefully we'll then tip over and some of these motherfuckers will drown and then you will get all the parts a rising tide lives all ships I wonder that's a great one right I

think I memorized it's a super famous expression I've never heard of it you've never heard of her he doesn't read much I've never I don't either somebody said it to me one time that's a great it's good yeah it's like a something that's good for us is good for all of us so I was the only one in shock of that you heard it before you really heard that have you heard of it team sports they say that a lot about you torches man I mean what then I don't you know I thought that I feel bad about it but it's recited one more all right a rising tide lifts all ships mm-hmm feels good yeah and then some of them tip over and your

enemies die comedy yes yes that's right that's the second part of them yeah and some of your enemies just fall off the fucking ground like baby and then you gurgling for oxygen they can't get it I can't get it that's right and then you get your then you're technically available right and then the sea creatures eat their dead bodies I know I worry about you sometimes I mean I love you and then sometimes every once in a while I worry to nibble nibble right at the flesh anyway right at the end of our podcast TT we do a thing called unhelpful advice yeah great and well let's not unhelpful advice yeah sure is there

category can be helpful or unhelpful sure I got one or go ahead unhelpful advice with Bobby Kalilah and Thomas Lennon hello tiger family I'm listening to your podcast now a little made me laugh and made my day better since I've been crying had an argument with my boyfriend about finances my boyfriend's jealousy I told him I feel like I'm walking through life not being myself like my soul is out of my body type thing we've been together for three years now I'm 29 and my boyfriend is 33 we have a two-year-old son and a five-month old baby girl my question is when we argue about the same thing over and over

I think I'm wasting my time or should I stick it out is it going to get better my boyfriend is more emotional and into the into his feelings I'm not talking about my feelings how do you guys get through your arguments and do you ever argue about the same thing a lot thank you they have a kid together to to well I don't know what the arguments about you know I think that's a specific yeah I think that if it's something finance it finances oh that's a big thing that's a big thing and her boyfriend's jealousy as well that's a big thing to me I was raising a house my parents actually kind of fought a lot and I will say as a

child grew up in a house where the parents fought a lot it's it can be rough it's very tough so I would say you know it's worth getting professional help if you can yeah to not just keep going down a rabbit hole and keep repeating the same stuff that you're doing to each other especially with those kids around you just don't want to you know terrorize them with your feelings and fights which you can do something together doesn't mean that doesn't mean successful parenting not necessarily yeah not necessarily at all that can be a big detriment yeah if you're staying together and just screaming at each other

and making it miserable that's actually worse way worse yeah the worst moments of growing up water were my parents arguing oh yeah my being my room and having them scream yeah it really just scary scary and scarred the fuck out of me I think when I never even thought about it until just now but there are moments I can distinctly remember times in what house it was you know what kind of night it was you know school night or whatever and it's not good for the kids yeah but if you want to make sure your children grow up to be very insecure comedians keep at it keep at it and you're gonna get some like these

people that won't go to see movies yeah because they're afraid people that they love will be in them yeah and it'll make them feel so bad that they'll want to burn down the movie theater because they so those are your options ships drown in the body yeah that one got always said was a rising tide lives all the ships I love it around like babies yeah so I don't know you should you don't have to stay you have another one that one's depressing yeah give me another one hello Bobo Coloco Gilbert and the white man hello I am a huge fan of your podcast and love your unhelpful advice portion I am a sophomore in college and

I've wanted tattoos all my life since I was a child but my super conservative Korean parents would practically disown me if I got any they say I would be disrespecting them as parents if I got any I thought about getting some and hiding them with cover-up or long sleeves whenever I visit home but I dream of having lots of tattoos what should I do is it worth potentially disappointing my parents have what I've always wanted my whole life or should I just give up Jay Lee I think that Asian parents give a lot of empty threats because I think I felt like my mom was very similar mm-hmm I wouldn't do it you

would not do it I would get hit says the guy with the tattoo that I'm looking at literally right now yeah because I regret all the tattoos I have you do I do oh I think that but what if they were cool tattoos yeah like what is this I don't know actually it actually does kind of look like a weird stamp from a nightclub that you forgot about yeah just a little bit and you can see like little like because they have to cover it up all the time oh yeah yeah first question in if you're ever gonna be in movies are always like yeah I hate it but I used to even if I wasn't in the business I just regret them but that's

just me right but she loves hers some right there's something that I got when I was 16 and another one this whole big block of black yeah because I got a random tattoo I hated and I tried covering it up four times didn't quite work yeah so I mean and I worked at a tattoo shop for several years yeah and I always just tell people it's like you really have to sit down and think about it because the way you want to express yourself today is not necessarily how you want to express yourself later and that's just on you forever yeah you know removing tattoos is three times more painful yeah can I make a quick pitch

if we're talking bad advice here yeah here's what you do get a shit ton of the great really good temporary tattoos which you can do at any Halloween store what you do is then go to the go to the house with the parents see if it gives them heart attacks and kills them if they're dead yeah you win you go get the tattoos done permanently yeah if they survive they they disown you and you're like joke alcohol rub them off now I know how you really feel right you didn't die what you said you would but what would probably end up happening and this is I really I like this idea yeah it's you wear them it's like gas gas like

them right yeah Koreans are fighting Koreans are violent yeah yes they'll hit you in the face oh my god right and then and then when you get hit in the face and you know hopefully it's that it's brutal enough where it leaves a mark yeah then you go right yeah you do that thing right yeah and then they're gonna get real ones everybody's weeping right they got to get out of the way and then you go get them you go get tramp stamps together let's say a rising tide all shit holes what oh that's so that's so just be clear about what you want don't I'd say do it yeah fuck it but I don't I don't have Asian parents

well I don't know I don't have strict Korean parents are you parents still together my parents are my parents live in separate apartments in the same retirement community kind of the dream but are they still they're still technically yeah yeah yeah but they each have their own like little pad in a kind of like a retirement scene which is like kind of the dream yeah that's amazing but they still see each other oh yeah every day yeah every day and you know but yeah when they need some space they everybody has a little bit of space right you know retirement homes can get a little bit contentious because you

know people have crushes in one another I actually the highest the I think that there is a really upward trend of STDs especially in retirement like I read that I do feel like I read that in an actual year's trip well they did they just they they smashed without condoms or what smash so much smashing so much a lot of smashing going on really yeah it's an old woman's vagina they still works yes wait a second you can't wait to watch an old man if you Bobby yeah who I love I have to check it out suddenly if it's an old lady oh oh my oh that would be horrifying good day sir I said good

learning a lot today thank you and that means I'm still gonna stay for another 20 minutes or so but good day sir so everyone watch Doc days I just really just I'm blessed that you came here man I'm I'm I really do I really I mean I know I might not see you for a couple years I know I know I do we have that kind of that's like I'm gonna call you and be like Bobby let's like go do karaoke right now yeah yeah that's not gonna happen I don't do anything yeah either do I know I go to bed and you drink Red Bull yeah but when we do see each other it's always great that's it really is I love I honestly picks up I

love you man you're good dude I love you back good dude give him a round of applause already Thomas and we are back Thomas Len was amazing he was amazing and I want to say something to the sleepers out there and the nappers who listen to our podcast every single one of you are special okay but there are a couple of you that are the real papayas oh yeah and there are you guys are all equal in many ways they're all equal okay but there's a couple of you that have signed up for our patreon and when you sign up for our patreon you're the real papayas it has nothing to do with sleepers sleepers you're still very special yeah

okay but these are the real papayas of life okay and I want to shut that shut their names out we got a Juan J. Aguirre Aguirre Aguirre say it again Juan J. Aguirre I wonder what ethnicity he is I don't know Aguirre okay we've got the Laszlo Tatay is that Asian is he Asian right right Laszlo Tatay that sounds like a real papaya name that's a real papaya Laszlo is a great name it's a great name and Laszlo probably has a very big penis very sounds like a big son's name Matthias Matthias Scholl Rodriguez that's a long name that's great name right Matthias is a great name and he has a very long penis oh he's

long yeah not necessarily big just long Melvin Flores also is a real papaya Melvin Flores has a very short penis sorry Melvin Flores I mean has a a brown clip so what do you want to say but he's a real papaya but he's a real papaya because he's doing a patreon yeah patreon yeah what else do you want to say to Juan Laszlo Matthias and Melvin a final miss one what those are the guys Juan Laszlo Matthias and Melvin I want to say that since you joined our patreon I have a little secret there's an afterlife for you and in this afterlife you're gonna have three blind versions blind yeah they're blind I

forgot in the afterlife you want that that's an after now if you want that you don't know what you don't like you don't want vision yeah and then you get super wings as an angel oh right so when you die because you're a part of our patreon you're gonna get these metallic you know super wings wow yeah guaranteed they're made they're made in Tokyo they are by scientists and you can fly faster than other sleepers other angels out there sleepers out there you're gonna get your regular wings and they're gonna be very you know there we can be very good but not as good as these patreon wings yeah in heaven yeah

but you'll get every sleeper gets our own cloud and that's a good thing you get to sleep you know and you can also get a you know when you die and if you're a patreon you also get special privileges you we you know we have I'm not I'm sitting when we're all dead I was I set up a little party with Cleopatra amazing yeah Cleopatra and the guy that invented peanut butter who's you have the end with these yeah I do yeah I have the end with them and also um I got to mix clogs so look out look out look out so thank you so much guys thanks real papayas Clala does Bobby have any shows unfortunately not for a while since he's

currently on set most of the week so if you had tickets for Brea Bobby has to reschedule that date as well interesting and do you have any shows yeah I'll so many guys check well you're should look this what I mentioned that to you your bottom lip is shivering when I say that should I should I say it now I guess it's like there's no better way I have never in my life felt so much clarity and support from strangers you know you guys after last week's episode where I had a semi meltdown I thought I remember telling George and Gilbert like fuck I don't maybe we should edit that out because I'm like I don't really know if

you know it's a comedy podcast I don't know if I want that out there necessarily but we thought about it we were like fuck it just throw it out there and I just won't read any comments just in case you know because I expected a negative response because I cry a lot on this podcast one every ten you do but the response I got was not only comforting but it gave me so much clarity and I want to tell the entire slept kingdom I read all of your messages all of your comments once twice some of it three times and you were able to bring me a comfort of that not even a great therapy session with my

therapist could have given me and there are a few things you guys recommended books bought all of those there wasn't one recommendation that I didn't buy so I bought eight books over the weekend she's poor now there was something that a lot of you said that I feel like a lot of my therapists in my throughout my life weren't able to point out that you guys pointed out and it it it kind of it gave me so much perspective about why I was feeling trapped in this perfectionism perfectionist state of mind along with a depression of course because I that that I can't avoid depression is there but it's compounded by other things and

one of the things that it's compounded by is what a lot of you mentioned to me which was the fact that I was abused senses senselessly as a child physically I was always beat for the wrong reasons by my parents who tried their best my dad not really but he didn't stop my mom either one and that had never been explained to me and something so simple as someone saying hey like you're beat a lot as a child and I'm like you're right I could not I wouldn't dare do anything that might result in failure when I was younger because my mom would beat me if I did something as simple as forgetting the

shampoo in the locker room little things like that and you know that like really builds throughout your lifetime or you don't think that it matters anymore because you're just this reestablished adult but that's ingrained in me so with that I say thank you because I feel like no one's awesome ever put it so and I'm telling you guys like these were thoughtful messages like really I usually don't like reading long messages but I read every single word of every single one from all of you and I just want to say that I've never felt a greater and better sense of community and that I maybe didn't think existed but

I know now that you guys are fucking dope and your family and I love you and I thank you endlessly okay she's gonna I'm not gonna cry look she's gonna cry so so I awesome though that's really you guys are great the slept kingdom dude we have some really prophetic and smart people yeah that listen to this and I when I was reading some of your emails I was like oh my god I'm so dumb like some they were just able to kind of explain things to me that I wouldn't even be able to properly articulate you know myself so thanks for that I really appreciated that and I will try my best to get back to everybody on my own time

but it's just a there was a lot of it and don't worry about it being the perfect response you can just say oh my god four years later I have thought of that too because I was like should I have oh my god that's you're so right I was like I should some of them are like divulging a lot of information about their life and I was like I want to give a meaningful response not just a standard one so it's like each one has to be different because what if they compare notes with each other you know and I'm like oh you're right I should stop doing that they're listening now they know they're appreciated yes you're

so appreciated and I thank you from the bottom of my aching heart that's so cool also why they're so amazing is because I've got a lot of got a lot of direct tweets to Olivia Munn I saw those I was embarrassed but also thankful thankful but also thanks guys keep that up because I was a lover to be on this podcast Olivia Munn Twitter also just a shout out to our sponsors thanks again to all them for supporting this show for 10% off on your slim and sleek front carry wallet go to RidgeWallet.com and use the promo code tigerbelly and for a limited time summer savings of $160 off your mattress go to lisa.com slash Bailey did I miss something it's

one fart the dog no George is ill at me like tongue-kissing my dog which is so normal yeah we're so normal in LA yeah dog a dog that licked my eczema you don't think that I want Giardia Giardiasis you don't think I want that maybe I do maybe I want you know intractable diarrhea maybe she wants Gilbert's maybe it's part of my weight loss program did you ever think of that kiss me dog kiss me dog any update on your diet is it still the same from my diet yeah you said oh you I guess you did eat some meat this weekend I a lot of vegetarians wrote me and they said something that deterred me from eating

meat they said everything that you're feeling right now is not is necessary and you're actually facing your true self and that's something that is only possible when when meat is not in your system I was like oh I and I I take it with it gave me a reason not to go to Korean barbecue and look if you're a meat eater that's fine I just don't like the the way the agriculture the business is ran yeah like the inhumane thing but if you're eating you know responsibly whatever I'm no judgment is what I'm saying I'm not one of those no judgment she had four hamburgers yesterday she's a liar

but you're hurting some beings yeah someone was like oh no this what you're feeling is something is it is a gift that's only given to you when you're not eating someone else's soul well when you put it that way I'm also like wow that's actually that might be true I'm very easy to convince when I'm not in a steady state of mind you can tell me everything you can tell me right as a blue like you're right you know but eat souls for happiness yes steal their happiness yeah is that the point be stronger from it I mean fuck the day where you know you realize plants are sentient are there two dogs eating my

knee scab this is oh because you probably put coconut oil in it I put nothing on it oh they just like meat so they're not vegetarians also guys shout out once again to those real papayas if you're wondering what are they was he talking about well we have a patreon and we'll be dropping premium episodes that will not air on anywhere else except on the patreon website and we'll be dropping those every Monday so make sure you check out our patreon at patreon.com slash tiger belly for those special episodes and it's for just all the basic access to those audio files and maybe some other secret things it's

just five dollars a month and then if you want to get a shout out like what you just experienced from Bobby butchering your name go and see how go see and how by visiting I'm not gonna tell you I'm gonna tell you so go check that out George I miss anything on that I think we are golden golden on that any other announcements guys before we sign off shout out to shrimp daddy at the 626 market shrimp daddy for the free food Asian owned delicious yeah that was in fact that was a highlight of going there because the crowds were really it was too much for me yeah it told you it's good when it's early on yeah enjoy it

and too many people cloudless are sweating and she looks crazy remember my armpits yeah like there was like juice like it's like you were like a nectar eat so you guys just ran into each other there you both had plans to go we talked about that just like like oh hey remember when Gilbert was like Lila you need to get out more and you need exposure therapy oh I saw Bobby there too you know I saw a whole thing I totally like we were both we were all sitting there we're like oh we brain farted we break for like you know who we brain farted about to was Steve and I Lani cuz because that's a place that they

would very much enjoy and everyone was there yeah Bryce's brother was in town I had to spend time with them so it's okay but oh he said it's so sad it's back again what next year it's next week next month once I've heard good things you know everybody says it's right you would love it you probably find a girlfriend there easily like no joke come on you that's his style what's my style he's your file he's your file style a file style why is your face like that I love how Bryce thought that was the funniest thing also Bryce is back and I'm a little upset because Bryce only has a hundred ninety three followers

George doesn't you only has eight hundred ninety three and George has four thousand yeah so I was closer to five but you know or five figure to get Bryce that 10k get Bryce that 10k yeah wait you have another person with your handle it's on YouTube some YouTube guy he's horrible he's awesome I love this very attractive he's always running around with his shirt off you know when are you doing that you know every photo is shirtless but you know looks like an Abercrombie that that you might be getting accidental like Google hits on yourself that's the upside to it I think that's actually a business strategy to

align yourself or name yourself something similar that's already existing even if it's something negative because you might get accidental clients that way so follow Bryce Halleck you like micro fish yeah yeah bring back the yeah so make sure you follow us on Tiger Belly on Instagram at Tiger Belly on Twitter at the Tiger Belly tweet Olivia Munn and also email us any questions or unhelpful advice at the Tiger Belly at gmail.com you can follow Bryce Halleck at Bryce Hal yeah and then George Kimball at oh you'll find at Bryce Halleck and then you could follow Kalala on at Calamity K and all Bobby Lee stuff at

Bobby Lee live everyone Hey Prime members you can listen to Tiger Belly ad-free on Amazon music download the Amazon music app today or you can listen ad-free with Wondry plus in Apple podcast before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at wondry.com slash survey