TigerBelly - Episode 51: Make it Spread 2016

Episode Date: July 27, 2016

Admiral Bobby doesn't get an invite. Khalyla gets spread open. Gilbert is not dead, phew. We talk tiger maulings, Pink Dick resentments, and a deep creep.   Recorded July 25, 2016 Music by Bobby Lee Instagram: @tigerbelly Twitter: @thetigerbelly YouTube.com/tigerbelly Facebook: thetigerbelly www.thetigerbelly.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey Prime members, you can listen to Tiger Belly ad-free on Amazon music download the app today Hey Yo, dog, you ready brah and Bobby's opening with Urban Bobby shit Cuz Urban Bobby, would you like the countdown roof dog? Yeah, do the countdown bro five Welcome to the Tiger Belly. My name is Bobby and we've got Kalyla and we got Gilbert and we got George as a pink dick and Welcome to another the 51st episode of our Podcast podcast our podcast and I just got back from Sacramento and thank you for all the people from Tiger Belly Showing up to the show, but it wasn't enough and I'm

It was the worst weekend I've ever had there Why do you say worst because I've been there that Sacramento punch line probably 20 times my life And I usually do pretty well numbers wise. This was the worst I've ever done Well, the location of that place is upstairs next to a mattress store. So it's a little bit um You know, it's not conducive for business Yeah, and then they stayed they um closed that Mongolian restaurant across the street, which I love you ever been to a Mongolian restaurant Were they cooked in front of you? Yeah, well, they have that gigantic thing. You know, I love that I lived in Mongolia and it is real how many years there 20 years I lived in Mongolia. Oh my gosh

You're not in the Marco Polo cast Wow career attack right away. Sorry, you know, I've had a really rough I've had a rough week career week You know, I number one. Why are you so excited? Because she likes when she likes to rub it in my fucking eyes Specifically your eyes no about a year ago about a year ago, bro You're both I auditioned for a show called Montauk. What's that? I'll just tell you what it is, dude Mm-hmm. I go in I go in and I play a teacher and I did good and then they called they go

Yeah, we were very interested in him So they put me on hold for a couple of months and then they go, you know what? We don't think that there's an because it's a genre piece. So we don't think there were Asians in the 80s. So we're gonna hire Andrew Daley. Who's a friend of mine? He was on Matt TV. I love Andrew But then he couldn't do it. So they called me back to see what my availability was What do you say? And I say I'm available. Oh, and then they go and then another month went by and they go No, we I think we're gonna get a white guy And the show is called Stranger Things now

You know I mean and As a teacher as that teacher and I didn't get it because of my gookie eyes You're supposed to be a stranger Yeah, I could have been in it, but I didn't get it and it's like my gookie eyes Fuck me again. Fuck me again. Now. Were there really no Asian teachers in the in Montauk in the 80s There were but They sold opium They're just dealers dealers. Yeah, I did laundry and stuff

But um, so then that happened and then I get invited to do oddball Big deal, right? Very big fucking deal. I look at the flyer and my name isn't tiny little black You know, I mean The red and blue bold red. They did red. Oh, they did bold ones. Yeah, Brian Regan, Sebastian, Gabriel Glacias, Sebastian, Big Red And then tiny little black font. I want to see it. This is my exaggerating. No, look at it Me, Ellie Wong, black little black funk funk. I mean font Eliza Schlegger slashing hers black little black font That fan in red and bold. Oh my god. No He's never gonna be invited to that. I'm sorry. He's too good. What if he was on there?

He's too. Oh, if he okay, let me just say if you had a black name on there internally combust He would die on the spot. I'm not incompetent. I love the guy. What are you guys talking about? He's my big fan So you would split an hour at oddball with that fan. Yeah, 30 Bobby 30 day. Okay. All right But yeah, I didn't get um red font. That's fine. And then um, what else happened? Oh, and then I shot Matt TV last week. Cool. How was it? It was all right, but One of the scenes was um Ike Barron Holtz

Gives two of the cast members A tour of his dressing room like oh my god's eye giving us a tour And then he there's a little thing on the wall that like a thing opens and I'm living in there And I've gotten feral And basically what happened was when the show got cancelled. I got stuck in the wall Or it was a big storyline behind me. Yeah. I got stuck in the wall. You have to see and um I've gone completely feral and But then it's like but then I think you know what?

Since Matt TV, I could have probably just stayed in that wall. It's pretty much the way my career is gone. Not really Oh, come on. That's what the joke was. That's what the joke was. Well, if you're in a wall, would you be? That's what the fucking joke. They wrote it that way. You know who wrote the sketch? John Barron Holtz. Oh Ike's brother The Barron Holtz is having it out for three years for me on the fucking bus. So then I um So I have long hair. I'm dirty. I am feral. I'm the one. I'm feral. I'm the one. Go to Adam Ray's instagram and there's a video of it there. It is. Yeah, it's so funny

I watched it probably 80 times You just please watch it. Oh, you were feral and you're like, I'm trying to I'm trying to get a job here Your fingernails are all dirty. Yeah. So my point is is that And then oh god, it gets worse. It gets really worse So then I um I forget I can't I don't rip on anybody. No, I don't want to rip on anybody. I'm not gonna rip on anybody And then I went to the Sacramento punchline this weekend. It was pretty bad. So I've had a tumultuous Week, but you know what guys? I'm not gonna give up. Boom. I'm gonna do the oddball as black font

It's all the same I'm gonna go, um, you know, do I'm gonna host mad TV next Friday with Ike live Next Friday this Friday this coming Friday. I mean live. Are we go are we going? Can we you're gonna go? Can Gilbert and Georgie come with me? They want to come they can come. Yeah 100% you can be my auntie The entourage and then um, but you're gonna come to oddball Kaila because people have been requesting to do a little, um, Vlog vlog when I'm there backstage because I'm gonna have a panic attack. Oh, okay. Sure thing. You know what I mean? So you're gonna come do that and then wait. Why are you gonna have a panic attack at oddball? Because it's you know, I I never do well in front of more than 10,000 people in a crowd

Oh, I thought you killed that one giant crowd that all black show you said you came out Where you said you bombed that then you did it again and you killed some story or time. Yeah, it's the same That's when he followed Leslie Jones. Yeah, the first time and I bombed and then the next week. It's fine. It's just difficult Okay, Gabriel. I'm a Gabriel. What's your name? You've been calling me Gabriel for the festival. What's your name? I'm not Gabriel Glacias, man. Gilbert Filipino Gilbert. Yeah. Hey, I have a I have a cousin named Gabriel And he's the one who molested me when I was eight. He's Filipino soon. That's way too soon. How old are you? Yeah, he fingerblasted me. He blasted your little verge. Well, I was asleep. Yeah, he How do you know that? What was the dream? Because I woke up and my panties were down and then his fingers were inside me

And how concerned he is concerned or excited I was it was painful and I woke up from the pain But when you hear pain what the worst pain of all of it combined. All right, was I wasn't invited to george's party So george has a party because he's leaving maker. You guys were invited, correct? I was invited and it really just kind of stung like a spiritual rape myself. Wow It really hurt my heart and um, like you're my producer for this. I Feel like I brought you in here. All my friends were invited and I wasn't invited. Why why George? Yeah, I don't need to I Don't need to respond

Yeah, yeah, but based on my okay though Yes No, but she doesn't and I wasn't invited and that's one one What's wait, why is it one? Okay, because I didn't respond to his emails and all that stuff over the years and I think it's one one and Hurt by it, but that just shows your character and that's fine Hurt by it, but you need to ton of hot guys there, baby. I bet whoa. Oh, and here's another thing bitch Yeah, and you went George you're gonna bring Italians over there to fuck it hit up my fucking girl at the fucking party It was like six Italians that try to rape my fucking girlfriend at your party, dude. Whoa, whatever they were Spaniards

Hey, anybody. Hey listen anybody Italians you European guys She's fucking taken man By a Korean doesn't fuck me often. Yeah Do we not fuck like an hour? It wasn't called fucking. Oh, I don't in what world is that considered fucking did I stick my dick in your vagina? Yeah, but it was like a lie. He fucked it. He called. You know what he does. He was like singing this song called make it spread Bobby stop and then I spread her cheeks open really But I pull her pants down and stuff like dig in her vagina and pump to the right and it was it was rapist

It was it was good, but was it sex such a deep creep like deep creep deep be creepy Spread Daddy that was so wrong what you did to me earlier. Oh, we'll call the police son Or some Italian men, I don't know. Yeah, we'll call the time. Let me sit bitch. I'm gonna say something right now You get Italian man to fuck you and I and I and I know right? You'll see what happens to those Italian George didn't stop it, babe. He just walked I know I know everything about this fucking guy Maybe maybe he was trying to send you the pictures like a look what your girls up to. Oh, so so let me say something to you George, okay? Why don't we start here you just tell me all your resentments

Alright about because I feel like you have resentments toward me and I will I will apologize for them and then no more of these games that you play You start inviting me to your parties and you stop having Spanish people try to fuck my fucking girlfriend, okay? So tell me exactly what you have a resentment toward me about and I will clarify and I will apologize go ahead Get on the mic George Because Gabriel ain't saying shit last couple podcasts Well Gabriel also is having the worst week of his life because he got into a huge accident, which we'll talk about after George Talk about bad we go ahead Um

Just professional resentment you it's hard to get notes out of you man It's hard to like I I try to respect you I try not to like email you or call you like late or text you yeah, but then All the days at maker I had so many big dreams. I don't have resentment now because I can text Lila and we can make things happen So it's kind of hard to have resentment when when things so when I was at maker and you were my producer That's when you had the resentment Yeah, it was hard to get a hold of hard to get a hold of hard that we had lots of videos that lots of videos that we needed Yeah, they were brilliant that the world

Really brilliant ones. Yeah So me doing rotates and An old practice and dictator and I will come right now. Just set the fuck up. All right Not credit. No, but during that time period is when I was doing all those things right In the last five years. Yes I had probably worked the least out of anyone from that TV But I still fucking worked and when I'm on a set with a real movie

I ain't gonna do you too, bro, but listen to this you don't leave people hanging That's just the principle of life. You know what get out get out get out Go back a bro. I quit my job for you Bobby. I know you And thank you thank you for the pressure Thank you for the pressure Yeah, no, why is your day back week bad? He got a fucking t-bone and nearly died this past weekend in Chicago You know what they say when you get hit an accent everything slows down. Yeah actually does

Uh-huh, but everything's a blur. He has a huge wealth on his leg and he showed me the wreck and it was I who was driving It was a hidden run so I didn't know you were driving your own car rental car Which is fucking worse. Okay, so you're driving a rental car and somebody hit you from behind No, no, no, they hit me front passenger side. So I spun a 180. They basically ran a red light They hit me on the right. I spun and they took off some guys was just like y'all. I got just took off you dead, man I got out of the car. I don't know why I was telling her I got out of the car so angry because it was adrenaline I had to kick the door cuz it was stuck. I kept yelling. It was just raining. Yeah, and I just found out the guy wasn't there and I really

Gilbert if you died We would be shattered be on repair. Oh, I want to hear Bobby say it devastated. I No, I'm trying to figure out how I feel No, I'm not being real. I want to do the most honest thing. Okay. Tell me that Gilbert died in an accident Yeah You need to sit down for this. What I Just got a text from who? I'm Gilbert's mom. Who's that?

Babe Gilbert Gabriel Gabriel the guy on a third Mike. Oh, yeah. Yeah, he's cool. What happened? He died Gilbert's mom died No, no, no Gabriel Gilbert himself himself died. Yes, and then what what happened? What else so many questions yeah, yeah, that made me feel weird doing that I don't actually want to do that Yeah, it's not gonna ever fucking happen and never want to actually say that but I used to always say I'll never get an accident cuz I never been an accident. I've been in millions who that's part of life. Yeah, he hit and runs I hit and run. I've been running it. I gotta hit and run. I don't know But he does like like small hit and run. He's like serious like he hits their

Um bumper if it's a bumper away if it's a bumper to bumper and it's a white person Oh, you you get in my BMW, right and they pull over. I just drive by you're good. It's stupid It's even say hi. I don't say hi. I just got to memorize my license plate. I'd rather go to prison I'm being real. All right. You didn't die and I don't know what you're saying. Okay, so I'm sorry that Can we talk about my bad week? What the fuck happened to you bitch before we get to your bad week and I have a question Yeah, I was walking in the kitchen and there's like a shitload of toothpaste and toothbrushes. Okay. Are you guys donating? No, no, no, no, here's the thing. I'm glad you noticed that and I'm glad that I'm not the only one that

Has to deal with the situation. Oh God. It's a group thing drama. It's not drama Kaila There's two things. Okay. She's a normal person. Yeah Yeah, okay, that's right. She's not but but she hoards two things She holds water and Fucking toothpaste if you buy her the biggest size toothpaste One day it's gone. I'm not even I'm not even kidding you

Right, so I bought 20 boxes later today because I'm fucking tired of going into the fucking Bathroom and having you know what she did the other day. I bought a toothpaste She used it in two days then she filled the water into the tube to make it seem like you know Like there's some still left Bobby won't notice. Yeah. Yeah, that's what fucking whore's do and people with diseases Look, I there's I can explain one of my favorite things to do to decompress when I'm in the shower is To put a shit ton of toothpaste on a toothbrush sit there think and chew I chew down That's why I go through toothbrushes once a week one. Oh, I get one every week

I just sit there and I chew like a fucking dog teething. Yeah, and it's one of my ways It's like it's a coping mechanism I've been doing this since I was younger and you can always tell if you walk into a bathroom Which one my toothbrush is because it's the one that's just completely like dilapidated. Yeah, this is sense. You've known her Yeah, and with a whole water thing. I think I hide balls of water I hide them under the bed She finds them all the time and she drinks all my water. I have an obsession with water I need to always touch it. I need I have panic attacks when I don't have like a bottle of water next to me

I think that I spent most of my life in the water twice. I did two days for 15 years I need to be I take two showers a day and I know it's a California drought But it's for my sanity and I just um If I could sleep with a finger inside a cup of water, I would okay. Yeah, it might I have might have a problem You know, she definitely has one I get why you bought all that now and I buy I drink probably I'd say eight of these a day It's I'm not even kidding you. That's the truth. Yeah, and it's like Dude, it's like all my money is going into water Bottle water bottled water waters for you know, what are you drinking right now? I have extreme anxiety. What are you drinking right now coconut water that rocks?

Roxy. Oh, there's this okay our fan Roxy Roxy. Yeah, I am a rock. Okay. The reason why my left leg is numb It's because of the fact that she's been sending candy. I Sort of got candy ice cream all kind of fucking shit, right? I left leg is completely numb now from diabetes Are you serious? Yeah, I think this bitch is trying to kill me. She knows what she's trying to feed us She just send us healthy things coconut water is very healthy, but she also says gummy bears and stuff But she does love I love gummy bears and all that and she's done as a huge bag of high-choose Which are your favorite? I love high-choose man. Yeah, my favorite. But look at this right here. These gummy givers are from her Yeah, everything cats. Yeah, the strawberry kid cats from Hong Kong. I think yeah, she sent those two. Yeah, I love her

Please keep sending us. Can we talk about my bad week? Go ahead or is that gonna take down the whole podcast cuz mine's like real life I mean not to say your accident wasn't be real life. You know his accident wasn't real life I don't feel bad about it. I don't I'm trying to move past it. Don't there's nothing to move past Sweetie, he's traumatized. There's a fuck now. You tell me yours. Thanks. Thanks. I'm sorry. What what George? You have something to say. Thanks. I fucking know I am in a bad mood right now. I mean a grumpy. Why? What's tell me the bad day? Well, it wasn't I didn't have a chance to talk about it last podcast because we had a guest and I didn't want to bring down the energy but my stepdad

Roger had a massive heart attack and he almost died and It was three days of just hell because he went in initially to for chest pain and his blood work was positive for you know something that for Troponin his troponin was positive. And so I told him I was like look you cannot leave here Your troponin is elevated. It means your heart has sustained some type of damage, but Kaiser discharged him Because they didn't fucking I'm so done with Kaiser. They sent him home with elevated troponin And it's such a huge marker for possible heart attack. So he went in and out of the emergency room for three days And they kept telling him. Oh, it's just heartburn. It's just heartburn. It's just heartburn

And I kept my sister and I kept telling them. It's not heartburn. Can you do an echocardiogram? Can you do further tests? No, we don't it's not blah blah blah. They gave us a fucking run around all weekend finally Monday morning. He had He full blast heart attack to the point where he needed to go and get surgery Within 40 minutes. It was he was in and out of surgery within 40 minutes. It was awful He had a hundred percent occlusion in his like main artery That shit really scared me, you know, you and your sister gonna tear the hospital apart. I I mean, I'm not I mean, I told him to you know, like I like to respect my boundaries with like medical professionals But I mean, it's just really frustrating when you have to even when you advocate for someone

They still do it wrong and I was just really scared because Roger has been like my dad for the past 15 years, you know So I was terrified and really upset and I needed to just get that out my chest and I think we're all having a bad week But I'm glad that we're here together George had an amazing week. George has had an amazing week Fuck you George. Why is your week so amazing? He quit his job for us, baby, but we need to make money though Are you quitting your job? We know it has so much pressure on us to make you fucking money dog He's a king maker

Wow, I love it. Great. He's manifesting it. Yes. How great is it that he has that much belief in us? It's great that he's gonna quit a senior producer maker. Good job, Georgie Good job. Did they try to hold on to you or? Wow, but Taraka was she at your party But she was invited babe, she was invited Taraka. Yeah, do you like her? Yeah, she's cool But you're my favorite from there Don't laugh like a little schoolboy. He did a heehee. Yeah. Yeah. Hey, I really you're one of my favorites You know who's having even a worse week than us. Who did you guys see that video of that tiger mauling in China?

No, so I mean, I'm I don't know why I'm laughing. It's really fucked up But look at the video online some woman I guess gets into of an argument with they go into a safari park You know when you those safaris where you cannot you shouldn't even roll your windows down You just go through it and they're like wild tigers around here or whatever she gets into an altercation I guess with the The other person in the car she gets out of her car goes to the passenger side and a fucking tiger just mauls her like grabs her and

carries her off of the thing and Then a second person who was inside a car goes and tries to save her gets mauled by a second tiger and then gets mauled to death Don't get out the car. They got out of the fucking car. Were they in the zoo? It was yeah, it's like a zoo But you know those wildlife safari parks where you've never been to China. Yeah, I've been in Africa. I've been to them Okay, good. Good. I have yeah, I know. Yeah. Yeah, well, you're not supposed to get out of the fucking Rule number one don't leave the fucking car like we're in the Jeep in Africa. They're like there were the lions. I go well cool I'm not leaving the car. Yeah, why do they leave again because they got into an altercation like let's say you and I were fighting in the car

I'm like, you know, fuck you Bobby and whatever I get out the car. We're not getting out the car No, you fight in the car child lock. Well, no, or just go. Hey, let's continue this fight when there aren't fucking tigers around Let's find out the hotel. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, let's do I know you're mad sweetie, right? Because I'm playing too much destiny, right and whatnot, but can you say it when we're inside a hotel? Mm-hmm. Not where there's fucking tigers are You have to watch the video babe, I don't want to drag she died the second lady who tried to save her died Oh my Chinese though Chinese Too many

Why are you laughing because you smiled I didn't smile. Oh, there's camera. Let's go. That's right. Oh Chinese died Speaking of crying, what's with these snaps of Bobby always having a massager leg? Oh Oh, he pays to play. Is that a real currency? It really is She's gonna happen tonight, too. It's not gonna happen. I do you know why he pays in massages? Do you know what? Do you know why it's not gonna happen tonight? Why? Because I came in to okay. Let me just say something right now. I've been so fucking busy, right? I did fucking iron banners going on. All right, explain iron banner is a thing

It's a tournament that only happens once a month and because I was busy this week I couldn't participate it ends at two in the morning tonight and I haven't finished it yet And if I would now my plan was to fly home, which I did this morning from Sacramento I thought she would be sleeping. I'll play all day long all night long, right and then boom I would finish it But I wasn't able to do that because as soon as I did in one game. She was mad at me. I wasn't mad Here's here's the deal with it. I Ask you how many hours do you need to play tonight because I can my sister's I can do things listen But this is what's unreasonable about you. I said I asked you today

I was a Bobby tell me what our day looks like. How many hours do you need to play destiny? He goes 60. He needs 60 hours today in one day. Yeah, yeah, he asked for three days in one day Oh, man, because it ends at two and I I'm hungry, but I'm literally thinking maybe I'm not going to eat because I have to finish this thing Sacrifice, I mean, it's the need either. Yeah, it's that important to me. No one ate, you know, it's that important to me Mm-hmm, and you might think it's an addiction. It's not It's a game and I want to finish it. Why's your smile getting bigger? I don't know Oh, you know what happened and and the reason why I spread her cheeks earlier and penetrated her for fucking dry vagina Is out of punishment? Okay, I get it. That was punishment. Yeah, it was punishable for sure

It was and then just when I was kind of sort of getting into it. I stopped he stopped second punishment. Yeah, you don't get the juice Yeah Yeah, just as I was getting like a little bit moist. He was like, okay, that's enough No, you don't get my inner juice. My inner juice is the sanctum of life. Oh, yeah, it's life juice Okay, okay, and when you taste it you taste You taste pure life Like a baby. No It's like what uh, it's like a stem cell. No, it's not like stem cell

I want to tell you what it is when god created adam, right? and before eve, you know and That's stuff that made adam Yeah, but it's pure life my fucking jizz. It's like you know what women beg for it Oh god, they do they could we have your life essence? They yell about you in public. Oh, yeah, I'd say dude. You cannot have it. It's a it's a gift Okay, it's only bottled if I if I ball. Yeah, if I bottled it and I sold it in the fucking black market We'd be millionaires

Oh, wow. Yeah, it gets rid of like carpet carpal tunnel if you don't get yeah, you know what I mean Um flat feet. Yeah, no longer have flat feet. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah You're the finger arches if you're colorblind. You're just gonna see colors again. Dude. This is revolution. Yeah My sperm has all kinds of benefits that people don't realize. Yeah, you'll grow hair Back on your head. Okay, you know, and that's why like One girl ate my cum all the time and she grew a beard. I think that was a man My point is is that my cum has So many benefits to it, right? And I've been to doctors and scientists. Yeah, and they've studied it

You know, you know what it does if it hits fucking metal What it melts like alien blood in the movie aliens Whoa, it also has powers has powers too. Yeah, and she wanted it Inside she wanted my fucking life juice inside her you punished her and I punished her and I Reframed because if she would have been cool And as soon as I came in and said you play as long as you want today because I know that the The iron banner ends at two and it's gonna completely go away And all the work that you've you know, I mean that you worked on it. It's gonna completely go away

I would have been like, all right, you'll get a little bit of juice inside you Which would probably you know, I mean you give her benefits. Yeah, there's vitamins and your probiotics That pimple right there. Yeah, but bitch you don't get juice for a while Man, what is the punishment if he doesn't massage you? He doesn't get to play. That's it. It's bullshit. It's a bullshit Fucking pay-to-play system. Why is a pay-to-play because if I don't if I don't demand that from you I won't fucking see you. Okay. Can I just say this? I don't want to just

Have a relationship with you right now and this because this might cause a fight. It probably will I'm gonna say something very factual Okay, and I and and I'm gonna say something that I believe That I love kalayla. Okay more than she loves me. Oh god, it's gonna be bad. It's controversial bullshit No, shut. Let me let me say what I have to say Okay, you think you love me more than I love you. I already know it's a fact. Breathe kalayla. Breathe. I'll tell you why it's a fact Because kalayla loves going to a funny way of showing. Can I just say it? Can I just say it?

What I'm gonna say. Yes, you know, you're about you love going to the beach Correct. Yeah If you said to me one day, hey, bobby, I'm gonna go to the beach every day for 10 hours a day 12 hours a day Every day for a year I'd be like, you know what? I'm not gonna see you as our friend and that sucks But I support it because I want you to be happy You love the beach Go to the beach

Yes, I'll be hurt and I'll miss you and my heart will shatter But do it It doesn't it's not the first one with video games, is it? I love video games, right, but there's conditions Massaging bullshit. Yeah, so I love her. Fuck when the fuck would anyone why would anyone spend more than Five hours at the beach you spend 12 hours What do you like? What do you love doing? Say spending time with bobby. Yeah, that's one of them. Oh, wow, you know what if I had a rope around my neck

You know what I'm saying dog you guys know exactly what I'm saying dog player I just don't want us to become that that like, you know, I don't want to become that functional couple that just coexist We don't coexist. Yeah, we do sometimes babe. It's like You know, we we work well together. We're really good at communicating. All of these things are perfect But in terms of just we just don't have a we don't I understand. We don't connect enough. I don't know We don't hug a bow hug a bow. You know in yours in your Feminine way that it seems like a problem, but let me just say this right now. Okay. My parents were together

for 40 years plus No, 50 years now. That's right. It's really long. There was a time where my dad used to knock my Mom's teeth out with his fists. He used to get drunk and beat this living shit out of her To the point where he could have been arrested You know, man, and they were those were dark times for my mom, but she hung in there every every She gets an award what I'm saying is that in every relationship

There are good years bad years ups and downs. Okay. I just been I happened to be going through a destiny phase Look motherfucker. I I'm hanging a thing. Let's call it a phase. It's just a phase. Look, I told you What did I tell you last week? I'm not going anywhere. I know I will fight Yeah, and tooth and nail to make this work. Yeah, I don't care even if you tried to leave me I would try to find a way to make it work. I'm not but but look you also have You know to make concessions of you know once in a while. Okay, you know instead of 12 hours No, maybe one of you know, okay think 12

It's not 12 hours. First of all, that's it's 12 That's it is red. That's red dick. It's 12 and high. All right. It's not 12 and higher. It's red dick It's just that there are times when Trials of Osiris and the brotherhood, you know, I mean the iron banners going on and there's only a little window to play And you have to get the prize and it's not me It's they set it up that way bungee to get me addicted and I'm addicted to it And I and my brother's addicted everyone's addicted to it and I was I was out but they pulled me back in And for right now I'm going through a phase

Okay, and I'm hungry. I haven't eaten all day. How long is this phase last? I just want to prep myself I want to prepare my soul answer it honestly too. How long is the phase? I don't know And that's the best answer. I could fucking give you Gabriel And I you know what by your town You're on her side. He is. No, you're not everyone. Oh every guy in this room should be on my fucking side You know why they're not on your side is because we sit here and we wait here for a fucking hour for you to get Your ass off the couch and start the podcast or in the meantime, they're not on my side because they're fucking Gay and they don't have fucking girlfriends

What do you think of that? I'm on to you too. All right, you both dick suck and Be careful. I got your back Bobby. I got your back so hard dog. I'll suck your dick for it All right, so guys Gilbert has a special lady in his life. You don't know that who is it and she's asian jessica No, uh, I think jessica is for Who is it? I'm not just I'm just girl. I'm talking to you right now. Do I know her? No, give me a photo. No photos right now Very beginning phase. We're not going to ruin it for him like we did with kentucky four, babe I do want to say this. No, no, no, you're not going to switch the topics. You're not going to sway. No, I'm telling you

But tell me why he cares. No, no, no that this is more important. Remember you guys told me in like episode something early on Did asian girl? Yeah, I'm trying it. Yes. Let me tell you something. Yeah Yeah, you love something different about it. I love the cultural understanding of things. Yeah And I love the way you shifted The tempo of the direction of the thing so that I don't see a photo No photo. No photo. I don't have social media There's not a single photo online. I'm sure there's something on the facebook with no photos

We're also not gonna we're not gonna we're gonna make I'll show you later I See, oh, you know, he needs to see a photo. I can't show photo. I'll show you later. I can't I'll show you later We're switching this off. Okay. It's fine. Okay Uh, thanks for the tiger belly You think I'm kidding, but I'm not kidding. I'm not kidding either. I'm not kidding either I don't want to see now you're sitting back down. Okay

Do you see me sit back down? Okay. Okay. It's done. It's done. It's done Can you sit the fuck down? He cares about this girl and can you not ruin it for somebody? And here's my evidence Because I will not let this girl that I'm talking to be body shamed by a celebrity Body shame. We didn't body shame sarah. No, just I don't like she's fat. What if she is is that a problem? No Yes, it is. No, it's not. That's why I'm not showing you photos. She's not fat. She's very pretty. She's 400 pounds. She's chunky You look here, I'm gonna say no. No. No. No. No. No, you're not the only one. Let me say this I want to try the problem with him doing this. No, I have to say this. I want to treat you guys

It's gonna sound weird like my parents It's gonna sound weird. It's gonna sound weird. Go with it My mom, my mom has always told me that she's like never ever bring a girl home I don't care if you're dating her or whatever unless she is the one then you can introduce me to her All the other girls. It's just white noise Give me a couple give you a couple months and find out you to papa and mama thank you thank you okay that's fine and also if you all you would ever need to say to me is look she's special I care about this girl and

I would show you the most utmost respect yeah maybe I do take a couple digs at other girls that you've been with because they're throwaways and I know you don't agree that special and they're not impressive so obviously I'm gonna give you my most honest opinion but even if suppose I'm not fully impressed by this girl but if you loved her and you cared about her I would never show I would only show respect to you and her I would never fucking say anything bad about her in this podcast he would on the other hand anytime his brother comes to him says Bob I met this girl show me a picture show me a picture no and then

you know he there's his 30-minute whole thing show me a fucking picture same thing that's going on right now finally Steve shows him a picture first thing he says it's yuck yuck you get inside that wow awful he's awful so I understand where you're coming from and never show him a picture I want you to do something right yeah come on baby be nice just be happy for him it's an Asian man this is a big step she's in comedy no she's not an actress she's a civilian in the entertainment industry she's an agent no she's not right I'll just say this producer that's it oh fancy I know very ambitious all right fine

I don't care anymore okay yeah I don't care anymore what else do you guys want to talk about today what do you mean why are you so what was that I'm trying to switch the subject why I can feel Gilbert you know feeling serious about this yeah thanks I just want I just want to say this though before we end this fucking thing I don't know what I would probably have a long way to go but I don't care is that you motherfuckers that been calling Leslie Jones gorilla and all that fucking bullshit okay awful listen listen listen to me let's know just be quiet listen to me okay I've been in LA for 20 fucking years and I've been at

the comedy store for 20 fucking years I've known Leslie's for that long and she's struggled for a very long time okay she was at a point where she couldn't pair up bills at some times and she she's just been up and down she couldn't eat for many many years and she stressed out and whatnot and at the age of 48 she finally fucking makes it and then you call her a gorilla on Twitter first of all I'm gonna say this when I did that gig in San Jose where I bombed I had to follow Leslie Jones this is about eight nine years ago she was good then she was a beast Chris Rock knew it everyone knew it okay so anyone calling

her that is fucking crazy your racist there are a ton of racist people I mean a lot of people cannot accept that number one a woman is making it that big but a black woman especially is a ghostbuster like that just doesn't sit well why a lot of simpletons it just was a black guy that she does a black guy in the ghostbusters in the first one imagine the vitriol that a woman like Leslie experiences if even me doing a simple podcast that that doesn't even compare it's not even a blip compared to the notoriety and the fame that Leslie Jones is experiencing imagine if I receive a lot of hatred if I receive

hate mail if I receive essays from people in the fucking morning of the 4th of July just trying to hurt my feelings imagine the vitriol that she feels yeah I can't I get it blows my mind and you know what I don't blame her for leaving Twitter that is a toxic toxic toxic place for the thing is is this is is that she's always gotten it right like we all get it you know I mean what do you mean what do you mean getting it I mean we just by being in the public public eye no matter what level you're in you're gonna get you know some I mean I get it still a lot I learned it from this yeah but my point

though is is that it's like you can make fun of her comedy maybe you know I mean but to call her just to be racist like that's racist it just is and I'm glad but why is it when people call me panda I'm not that offended but when black people are called monkeys they get offended you know what people have called me panda or even raccoon sometimes yeah or a koala I go oh that's cool I'm like I laugh yeah why are we so accepting no because there's no okay it's fucking different why it's fucking different because you have a completely different history than black people you've had your you're a well-to-do Korean man that

lived that grew up in a fucking country club the history of black people in America is a fucking world away from your world so there's a lot of you know different sensitivities in play and I think that if I were black and if someone called me a monkey or an ape I would be a fucking offended it's I don't think it's that I think that it's that pandas and koala bears are known as to be cute right and there's a negative connotation when it comes to monkeys because they're so close to our gene gene right and you know like the step below our evolution you know so there is there is a negative thing but I don't

even know why that would be negative but I don't know stop tweeting those jokes bad things she's already off of Twitter and I don't think that she was necessarily offended because she's a comedian she's heard it all you know I don't think that she left Twitter because oh god this hurts I think she was more in shock of shit like there are this many racist motherfuckers in existence why do I want to be a part of this you know Richard Pryor did a roast once and on the roast panel it was Robin Williams was on the roast panel but Marsha Warfield was on the roast panel I saw that one and yeah I showed it to you

and Richard Pryor says said looks at Marsha Warfield we got this one you know at the zoo like she's a gorilla and the place just is dying laughing but the reason the why though is because Richard Pryor is number one black all right number two Marsha Warfield this is her friend they're very good friends right which get and he's a comedian so in those in that circumstance you can say stuff like that right but if you're just fucking some white dude you know I mean who drives a truck shut the fuck up you have no right you're a loser that's right daddy but it gets passionate I do to get his head shake yeah well he knows

Leslie that's his friend yeah it infuriates me because you know she takes so much bravery and walking through fear to do stand up and whatever she her dream is and it's like for any fucking guy who is you know man making fun of her who hasn't done anything makes me angry yeah these fucking keyboard warriors sitting under like in lazy boys just attacking people because they have nothing better they should have a thing they should have a thing they should have a thing you can comment you can say but you have to leave her address that should be law yeah I think so I think that's show me where you live GPS location you

can call me a gook but where are you exactly right and then if I know where you live then that's fair but these people are mysterious something I've no avatar have no pictures they're faceless and that's what infuriates me I think that should be a law and you know this is always my thing for instance anytime like in the beginning when we first started recording you know obviously I was very sensitive before George or you read the comments I was very sensitive so I would read you know certain fucking long ass essays written about me you know and I always think to myself wow this person number one

doesn't have a name didn't leave a real email address but if I would ever if I wanted to so many times to write them back and say hey sit in front of me at a podcast I dare you to sit next to Bobby Lee and attempt to banter with him for an hour in a podcast I I guarantee you you will fucking crumble on the spot I guarantee you so for these people to always kind of tear me apart in the beginning you know because yeah I'm not a comedian and yeah of course I'm I'm just I'm Bobby's accessory right no no no his partner no I know I'm his partner but I'm saying like I dare you I dare you take my seat if I could leave for

one week and take each person who's ever said anything you're not my accessory bitch shut up fuck up I'm happy to be your accessory no the reason why bitch bitch reason why you're I'm I decided to do a fucking podcast with you ding-dong that you can fucking do it bitch yeah Gabriel's gay Gilbert's not on this because he's Jenna's friend who happened to come to a UFC night that's how I met him no we tried him the first time he's he can do it and that's why he is in it George is here not because he I met him at makers because he can produce the fucking thing they're all everyone in this thing is in it because they can do

it okay so that's that where are we at a time not yet sir I always in my head I always speak more eloquently bitch but you're not accessory bitch no but I'm happy to be baby that's all I'm saying I'm not necessary your sidekick I'm happy to you know just be here in our home and you know talk shit I'm not talk shoot yeah it's um anyways sensitive subject really quick MMA minute what switch topics this is Mark Hunt statement cuz after you know Brock Lesnar tested positive I know of course just look at his fucking body yeah this was the official statement you put on M.A.R. Mark Hunt here's part of it well

this fucking white piece of shit sticking needles in his ass and say oh he's gonna take all of us all the way to the fucking bank let's give him fucking millions of dollars not worry about his motherfucker you know what fuck that and fuck your shit company look at that for a contract you consume me on that motherfuckers that was Dana Whitech that was the day no I'd good for him good for him cuz they they didn't allow John Jones to fight in that 200 card they didn't allow Connor McGregor to fight because he missed a press conference but they allow a juiced out Brock Lesnar who they gave a window of exemption to not

even test him very tight one yeah right and and and you you allow him to take the fucking big bag of cash in the meantime Mark Hunt who's risked his life against a fucking behemoth man goes home with no fucking cash you know what I mean yeah like it's it's absurd it's absurd that company is so inconsistent and so mob like that it's laughable I think that Dana White you know they sold the company for four billion not only do I honestly don't think he's a lot like a president I want to go to UFC matches I retract my statement we're friends okay yeah Mark Hunt don't talk about that you know you're doing a great

job for the thing what he did to Ariel Hawani I mean you know what so what do you think about Mark Hunt saying that he's gonna leave he wants to leave the UFC you're not gonna leave I think you'll leave no I think that he should wait it out because I think that a fighters union is on its way we're gonna fight fight bores in New Zealand I mean I mean this guy do you fucking throw you know I mean bore a little little hula dress and he's dancing on the beach now get your shit together Mark shut the fuck up you know who's gonna know white side I love him I love him I love him cuz Joe because Joe Rogan is about to leave

and they need a new commentator really Joe's gonna leave yeah he said he would leave what if the UFC ever got bought out and it fucking happened I just I here's what I here's what I want to say what they did to Holly Holm oh my lord Holly Holm right is it's done now for her it is it's done she lost two in a row yeah it's done yeah because like she number one didn't defend her belt Misha took it right then Misha didn't defend hers either yeah she's done I think Misha is done you know I think Holly's done and it's like they're just throwing these girls out there and they're using them up and I think that they should have held

on Holly Holm should have just been champion and waited for Rhonda to come back I have that big money fight but she gets fucked no I don't believe that I think that you know she got fucked yeah but I she's a competitive woman she wants to take a fight every three months and I don't think there's anything wrong with her taking you know girls like bullet or who's the last one she fought Tate yeah Misha she lost the Misha yeah yeah it's like those are the girls in the top five so why wouldn't they oh you know yeah but now it's like when is she gonna fight next who's she gonna fight exactly she's gonna be on

some sort of fucking B card you know I mean in some obscure night Fox night you don't think she still has the whole like I beat Rhonda Rousey no I don't because I think that first of all is Rhonda Rousey gonna fight Holly Holm or Nunez true that's the first fight that that Rhonda is gonna get I think Nunez is gonna get bullet next probably and I think that Nunez is gonna beat the bullet I love Nunez she's great and no one's talking about how good Nunez is because of the fact that she you know Brazilian or no she's scissors some other elements what she scissors no what is the other element nothing I did everything she's not

pretty that's not what I'm saying that's exactly a lot of different elements no I just think that she is somebody that has an accent she does unholy activities in the bad with other women and that which is great has nothing to do with me I love it I support it the LGBT yeah and I believe that she's not a marketable face right well she's also not speak English but she's not Holly Holm preacher's daughter all American you know all those things play into a narrative a storyline Nunez is you know Brazilian okay but then that begs the question do you want to just see good fights or do you want a narrative like

no I'm saying I love Nunez know what I'm saying is you know if we're always talking about marketability that's gonna you know we're not you're not prioritizing good fights you're prioritizing the narrative you know so you're operating like a business rather than a real sport well it's for me it's like it is a business and and you're the one that taught me about Conor McGregor all right I was I was at that point of view before Conor McGregor I was like it should be based on yeah but it's not it's an entertainment sport and Conor McGregor you know is an entertainer and he has revitalized that

sport I think John Jones is an entertainer I think that the stuff that he does running over a pregnant lady and all those part of the narrative is a part of the narrative and it makes it like exciting and weird yeah I think guys like Luke Rockhold who's like just this guy I love him but there's really he's just like a good-looking white dude that you know he's skateboards it's not really doesn't fit into any kind of thing you know he's a nice guy Cormie too they're all nice guys that whole camp actually okay came the last guy they're all just nice guys they're all friends and also it's a white guy a black guy in

a Mexican and together I don't like it I don't like it but I think I think what Johanna Young-Jagdek did for that Claudia Claudia fight what yeah what she was doing what she was learned it from the Conor blueprint yeah I think that it's good to be both to understand the business and to be the best fighter so if you're in the top five come up with a personality come up with an alter ego or come up with a great story for yourself because that's just gonna make you this isn't a big money-making sport so it's like get it while you can while your name is hot if I was Holly Holm I would have probably ran over a pregnant lady

too yeah I think Josie Aldo right yeah he is now beginning he's starting he's starting he grew a mustache that was a lot I'm not kidding you it was funny well you're laughing at that he's trying to be a villain now I think he looks a little like more reality old-timey like like Sherlock Holmes you villain he grew a mustache he's saying he's trying to speak English now which is weird which is weird and he said calling out Conor McGregor when Conor McGregor is not even fighting fighting him in his division you know so now like Josie Aldo looks like a crazy person yeah you know me and he's like he's in the movie you know

you're making about movie they were almost done with the movie do you know that about him oh yeah no yeah they in Brazil I mean if they said an actor that played him and they were shooting in the movie and when he lost to Conor McGregor they stopped production on the movie yeah which only made him crazier probably yeah and now he probably just talks to himself in a mirror and now he's turning into a fucking psychopath psychopath and we like what we love it and what we saw him against Frankie Edgar was a different kind of fighter I believe you know I love maybe maybe look good no he looks so good really disgusting what

that one you blew a piece of food into the mic and you just plucked it where we had time wise time for question yeah we are unhopeful boss with Bobby and Kalilah hi guys this is from Azar how can I be part of an Asian circle of friends I always see you guys at school in a big group you seem to have been having so much fun is a white guy Azar there is always a lot you guys always have a lot of energy I'm not Asian but I occasionally see non-Asians in groups so I have hope it generally seems like it's an exclusive club I sometimes hang out with whites but it's only a couple of them

and they always want to watch movies TV and etc and I generally pretty boring what is the secret to making friends with Asians thanks Bobby Lee if you're watching Mitch Mulaney here's a comic here's a joke about that that one white guy that's that's you know that hangs out with Asians so he's like more Asian than them yeah I'm hungry guy you know me yeah don't be that guy you know it's like you know we live in America I don't hang out with Asians my friends are think he's fetishizing if you want to hang out with a large group of Asians and you want to fit into that that's that's a fetish you know for me it's

like I don't the only Asians I hang out with is you guys David show my brother that's pretty much it growing up not really didn't really have a lot of white friends Mexican friends and a lot of my friends and stand up are all white and black and Mexican I don't really hang out with other I mean I'll see Ali Wong were friends you know I mean she's cool but I don't look at her and go wow there's an Asian girl yeah Steve Burns half Asian I don't really see him as that I don't have a proper answer for this because you grew up in yeah well no and also when I came from the Philippines for the first time the Filipinos all

rejected me I was too fobby I wasn't Philip I was too Filipino my accent was too thick and it I don't know I was probably didn't dress cool and shave my legs there were a lot of like well so I didn't catch up because I didn't know that I did I only ever shaved for swim meets because we had to but I didn't know that boys like shaved legs here I didn't know a lot of things and I probably you know dressed a little backwards because my parents you know we had already lost a lot of our money and you know I dressed like kid from when I first talked to Kaleila on the phone she goes sorry about my accent she said

that right away it made me go oh yeah I was very insecure for a while because I couldn't I had hard consonants and I was always called out for it so when I was in a swim team we would have to scream out our times to our coach so let's say like I do like a 50 butterfly right and I'd have to I'd have to say like Kala what's your time 26.2 right and I I was so insecure how'd it come out 26.2 I would go home and practice this 20 20 20 20 Oregon or mountain mounted because I was a mountain mountain oh my god no frigidare I was a refrigerator refrigerator like I would practice my heart ease because you know

it matters when you're 14 and 15 and people are like where the fuck are you from well you don't look Filipino and the Filipinos would say well you're too Filipino so you know who I hung out with Jessica my only Korean friend but she didn't even go to the same school I only hung out with Mexicans Mexicans took me in didn't give a fuck I went to more quinceaneras and it's so funny that you say that because in comedy there was a time where you had to be either Mexican black or white in the 90s and the Mexicans took me in I did Latina LaFestival yeah I did it's like in prison when you're like Asian and

like I gotta join a clan they go with the Mexicans yeah that's what happened to me Mexicans yeah Mencia Willy Barcena Jeff Garcia Gabriel Felipe as far as all those guys I started with because they were the only ones that took me in because the white ones I wasn't nerdy enough or cool enough like Dane was the thing then you know and the black ones no so I the Mexicans harbored me but also Mexicans just have a really really deep sense of family and a lot of the Mexican kids that I that I hung out with you know their families were immigrants right or they weren't here so so we kind of just bonded in that same

sense where it's like oh I was new to the country their parents were illegal immigrants and I just partied with them all the time and for a while they're I started on this school popular Spanish is my people I love them I love Mexican so much I really do they're inclusive yeah they're full of they're full of party in their heart yeah I love Mexicans I love I don't you know what I'm not a fan of and I'm gonna get a lot of shit for this be careful Chinese no I'm not a fan of super Bobby doesn't like well we know that a lot of Filipinos that live in California whoa I would never catch me dating a Filipino guy

either that's there's something about this sense of righteousness that the Filipinos were born here have that is a complete turn off California ones yeah it's like they kind of all bond together because they have this Filipino click but they know nothing about the Philippines as a country they don't nothing about the history you know nothing about the language but they're very like clickish and they're like oh but this is all of this is a flip crew this is a pinnoy crew I'm like no you're not because to them I'm not Filipino looking enough but I'm too Filipino acting and they're the ones who kind of

they're the ones who go back to the Philippines and have this this kind of air like oh but we're the Americanized Filipinos and I hate that bullshit I wanted to say this because you said Filipino right I just want to say anyone if you're gonna come up to me and recognize me don't go hey aren't you on YouTube because what that does is it negates everyone's on YouTube yeah okay yeah that's what a Filipino dude at a Mexican restaurant in Sacramento said to me hey dude aren't you on YouTube I go yeah you are too George Kimmel is as well George Kimmel I think everyone's on YouTube right if you say hey once you

on Matt TV or even Comedy Central is a vague but say that yeah don't say YouTube and that's the word shows for Bobby Kalala oh that's right in two weeks Bobby is going to be at the Arlington draft house in Virginia and the week after that he is going to be at Helium in Helium Comedy Club in Philadelphia and those are the only two dates I have right now I also want to let everyone know that if you go into our Instagram account we are having a logo contest and the contest ends a little bit under two weeks from now go to Instagram and find the details there I'm gonna repost it probably sometime this week and

anybody can enter you don't have to be this great artist to submit I mean I even drew something yeah up and we're like an artist right so we don't necessarily know what we want the only rules is no tiger so yeah whatever this means to you whatever Tiger Belly means to you yeah picture form right so throw throw us your ideas and so that contest ends in two weeks also we are looking for somebody to is it called a web developer yeah to help us with our websites and if you're interested in helping us with their website and you have experience with Shopify email us at the tiger belly dot com a tiger belly

at gmail.com yeah the tiger belly at gmail.com right right and also if you have any questions you can send your questions there for unhelpful advice you can also follow us on Instagram at Tiger Belly and on Twitter at the Tiger Belly and also if you want to mail us anything so we can open up in the vlog or if you want us to get Clyla a new hat cuz Clyla is on a hat streak right now you guys want to send a hat of her to wear on the podcast she might wear it George do you want anything I also he wants you know what I want because his dick is huge I really want harmless harvest coconut water I'm really thankful for this

particular one but for the next round if you ain't got me harmless harvest and also you can send us the stuff at 1626 North Wilcox Avenue unit 161 Hollywood California 9 0 0 2 8 and also you can follow Clyla on all social media at calamity K if you like videos of cats and Bobby massaging her legs and today I snap a pic of snap of him makey-nakey Bobby's penis is on her snapchat and if you want to follow anyone else on this podcast or people that have been on this podcast just go to our Instagram and hit follow and we're all there yep we are thank you for listening and we hope you guys have a wonderful week we will see

you next time bye hey Prime members you can listen to Tiger barely ad-free on Amazon music download the Amazon music app today or you can listen ad-free with Wondry plus in Apple podcast before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at wondry.com slash survey