TigerBelly - It's Leslie F-ing Jones!!
Episode Date: January 10, 2024Thank you to our Sponsors: Helix & DraftKings Casino Helix - Helix is offering 20% off all mattress orders AND two free pillows for our listeners! Go to www.HelixSleep.com/BELLY and use code HELIX...PARTNER20.This is their best offer yet and it won’t last long! With Helix, better sleep starts now. DraftKings Casino - Download the DraftKings Casino app NOW and use code TIGERBELLY. New players get an instant deposit match up to ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS in casino credits when you deposit five dollars or more. Check out Leslie Jones' Book: https://www.amazon.com/Leslie-F-cking-Jones/dp/1538706490
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This show is sponsored by Helix. Helix is offering 20% off all mattress orders and two free
pillows for our listeners. Go to helixleap. on the Great British Bakeman. Yeah, he won. He won. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Oh, you thought right? You know, can I tell you a problem? You finished. Can I tell you what your problems or what they actually it's not your problem
And this is what hurts my feeling this Jeff. This will hurt my feelings and mayhem
Yes, all all of the above but also am this he doesn't win. Oh, you're your mind. That's terrible. I
Look at John. No, huh. Do you see that?
It's insane. What's my problem now?
Do you know that Gabby is like the best?
She used to make your birthday cakes, right?
Yeah, I loved every single one of them.
Yeah, I'm just saying, shout out to our girl.
Great, so Gabby, so Gab.
Gab.
Everyone's gonna run blood for Gab because what you do.
Yeah, Gabby.
That's Gilbert's sister, Gab.
She's better.
I don't know what, but she is.
I still working with my friend.
Yes, on toist Blood. Yeah.
Yeah. Janina. Yeah.
She's great. Are you, what do you do for her?
I produce her podcast.
We're on HBO.
On HBO, Matt.
Oh, really? So it's about true.
So you get about the show True Blood?
Yeah. So I, I help record with actors.
So Kristen, power and ever and wall and they interview different actors from the show.
Oh, yeah. Yeah. I did use to get Joe. He'll be coming.
Yeah, that's my.
Tell him I said hi.
Okay, do you know?
Just like your brother, the same kind of thing.
Yeah, I knew him back before he was on True Blood.
Oh, I knew way back in the day.
You know what I mean, when he was just a guy.
So yeah, I mean, you meet people from in the early days and then you become friends and then they blow up and then they can't
Then they have to be nice to you. I think like Eric Stone Street remember Stone Street was like I knew a way back
When he was just a commercial actor. What's up? I mean, I knew Gabby when she was in PA school
Yeah, and you were miserable and I remember you feeling like you were at an impasse
in your life.
Like, do you do you know Gabby?
Do you even know Gabby?
Yeah, that's Gilbert's brother.
They're friends.
That's Gilbert's brother.
Brother.
Yeah?
Yeah.
Yeah, brother Gabby.
Oh, he's from...
Where am I from, Bobby?
Chicago, Georgia.
Exactly.
Yep.
And, um, yeah, that's it.
We would have wide together once.
We did.
Yeah.
You were attacking me in the street
and no one said anything.
Exactly.
I did try, Gabby, but there was no stopping him.
Also, like, I'm glad you were there
because it would have been me instead if you were there.
I've met your parents.
What do you think?
I love them.
I love them.
I want you to your wedding.
She's not married. Gilbert's wedding. Well, you were there, right? I love them. And what are you doing? I love them. And what are you doing?
I love them.
And what are you doing?
I love them.
And what are you doing?
I love them.
And what are you doing?
I love them.
And what are you doing?
I love them.
And what are you doing?
I love them.
And what are you doing?
I love them.
And what are you doing?
I love them.
And what are you doing?
I love them.
And what are you doing?
I love them.
And what are you doing?
I love them.
And what are you doing?
I love them.
And what are you doing? I love them. And what are you doing? I love them. And what are you doing? I love them. And what are you doing?
I love them. And what are's right, I got a reverse.
I got a both mixed up, yeah.
So I did cry.
Okay, I got a good one.
I think selfies, yeah, that's right.
Okay.
Yeah.
What do you want to ask me?
This is what I, this is what you do that hurts my feelings
and I just have to get it off my chest.
When you're having a particularly difficult week,
like I'm on speed dial, like you are like help me, me you call me six seven times in like a span of an hour
You dump all of you like trauma dump on me and then you're like I miss you
I love you. I can't live without you and then you're like I'm gonna see tomorrow
You're gonna be around tomorrow and then tomorrow comes and then crickets. And you don't even call to say like,
oh, I'm not coming over anymore to see the dogs.
So you just, I just don't hear from you.
And it hurts me.
I'm sorry.
Because you're like, we're gonna watch movies together.
I said that.
Yeah.
We didn't watch one.
We didn't.
In your mind, can you fantasize we did, though?
I can try, I can try. You have a little
bit of like trust in your own fantasies. You're right. You know what you're right. I just go we watch
this is you know what we watch fast enough viewers part 90 and you can make it up. They're old.
You know what I mean? The cars are a future. This is on me. You're right. You're on you, dude. This is
not right. You did nothing wrong. Because Sunday we spent the day together. I saw four scoped 15 and like, he doesn't have AIDS.
He does it?
Oh no, yeah, and Jenny's back alive.
Recurten, they reincarnated it.
Oh, I love seeing you.
So good.
And she grew up beard in heaven and she ran forever.
She went from heaven to hell.
She ran just like he did on earth.
You had the hat, the beard.
It's great.
Anyway, welcome to another episode of Tiger Valley.
I'm sorry that I did that.
I feel bad.
I feel bad.
I feel so bad about it.
You don't even remember.
I don't even know what you're talking about,
but dude, I swear to God, no, I do.
I'd know what you'd say.
She just wouldn't happen.
So, Saturday night.
Can I guess you had a date?
No.
Okay. No. Saturday night, I went guess? You had a date. No. Okay.
No.
Saturday night, I went through,
you know, I read things online,
I go into a panic, I call her,
she's the only one that can get me out of it,
and then, um,
then Sunday I came, I was super tired,
and then I had to do a show,
I remember at the store,
but I had been asleep because I flew in,
so I took a nap during the day,
then I woke up right before the show, and then I went to the show, and I was gonna go, but then I, um, because I flew in. So I took a nap during the day, then I woke up right before the show,
and then I went to the show,
and I was gonna go, but then I,
we got too late.
Can I just say something?
I dressed up all of the dogs,
I mean, they're Christmas stuff,
because I'm like, daddies coming over guys.
Daddy's gonna come today.
No, we gotta fucking get the gas coming.
And daddy didn't.
Neglectful parents.
Okay.
Anyway, sorry. Let's start over, baby. Neglectful parents
Let's start over maybe
He has a mother
Yeah, it isn't me. That's Gabby Hello
Yeah, Leslie just walking to Bush
What did he just walk?
The deck I freaking you out right? Yeah, is the if a Republican?
Yeah, yeah, would you would you would you fucking no?
What do you mean not even like I know but could just listen no you're an award no Vietnam
I don't give a scared yeah back in the 60s. Why would we be
Hypothetically Jesus yeah, yeah, you're a war with him. He's your admiral.
Absolutely not.
I would die at the sword for.
Yeah.
I literally would run into a Vietnam camp
and be like, kill me.
Kill me or train me.
Kill me or train me.
Yeah.
Yeah, so that's, you know, maybe do something.
But anyway, he has cowboy boots on.
Yup. I can go. I'm telling you, I'm telling you,
that I'm just getting this business,
this is a lachit.
It's a lachit.
They would rip back
and throw into your
life.
The people on the street would literally
start beating you with their fucking umbrella.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
They would, the handle of the umbrella,
they would just jam it in and out of the fucking bottle.
They literally would get him in the corner
and just destruct you. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, jam it in and out. Literally, we get him in the corner and just to start
Yeah, I know fucking where right. Yeah, my fuck and you know what you'd come
You'd come to you know like that. I'm sorry. Sorry. Sorry. So anyway, I
How do you want that in my brain? Yeah, I know. So Les, thank you for doing this and I
I just came in. I ain't do a test in one two three at nothing my fuck is just sitting here
You this is how we already did it. Oh, okay, so we already know the test. You already been working. No
We just do the testing. Yeah, but one two three one two three, you know
And we already did that we got the camera set up feel like I live in his room
He just comes in and talks to you guys
Why wake up and I come down, it's all set up already.
That's nice.
I do my share walk back up, no?
Oh, that's nice, right?
Hey Bobby.
So I want to-
I'm going to do something like that.
Yeah, you will.
And you will.
Show me how.
Show me how.
So many, many years ago.
That he's the guy.
That's guy.
No.
He's a big producer.
I don't want to do that.
He's a good producer. I know. I quit the guy. He's the guy. No. He's a big producer. And I don't want to do that.
He's a good producer.
I quit the business.
I quit.
So all of that picture.
When I want to sit.
Right, right?
Yeah.
That's the best thing I've ever.
So many, many years ago, you know, I've been at the comedy store for since 1990.
Yeah, LA's comedy store for, since 1990, L.A.s comedy store since 1997.
And through time I met Liz Leslie,
she was a regular there.
She was a killer on stage.
And we all knew in our hearts, I really did.
I mean, I would bet a million dollars on it.
I'd go, this lady was gonna be a huge star.
And, you know, it came true, you know, um, and I'll tell you how and you know
I just want to hate about you right now because I have a story that I tell on stage
It's so funny and you go it didn't happen, but it did happen. It okay
The way that you heat every time he introduces me this story gets more and more and more elaborate
That sounds about right Every time he introduces me, this story gets more and more and more elaborate.
That sounds about right.
It does.
I was like, so now, so now it was 200,000 people.
Now it was 200,000 people.
By the way, he tells that story on here all the time. I mean, does he raise the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, maybe. No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Absolutely, it had to be only like 10,000.
Oh, please, please, please.
I had to be like, it's 10,000,
we'll cat Williams.
It was just like, okay, Shepel.
It was like 10,000 people.
We'll shepel not there.
I don't remember.
I don't remember.
I remember Shepel, Pablo Francisco.
I remember Pablo and Cat.
Yeah, I remember David. I think he was. Mencia was on it. I remember mencia was on it. I remember Pablo and Kat. But I remember him, David. I think he was.
Mencia was on it.
I remember mencia was on it.
I remember that.
So with that lineup,
and I think it was at the San Jose Ampitheater thing,
and that's 20,000 seats.
Oh shit, I'm not that.
Okay, so here's the deal.
Wow, that's funny.
And the truth is this,
and this is actually,
I'm gonna go, let's be honest.
He's lying.
And I'm not lying, I'm not lying, I'm not lying.
Let's, he's so exaggerating to the second power.
Okay, let me be as real as I can.
Let me let you finish.
Okay, let me finish, okay.
Okay, we're on the same show.
You wanna perform me.
Those are facts.
Okay, you don't believe? No, yeah, I did, I went before you. Those are facts. Okay. You don't believe?
No, I did.
I went before you.
Okay, good.
So, you went up before me,
and you crushed.
Was I with SNL then?
No.
Oh, wow.
That's why you were wild.
Yeah, I was.
You were wild, but you were faking.
Oh, and that was...
What do you remember what year that was?
No, but you weren't on SNL yet.
Because it had to be in my getting over my brother years
because at that point, I didn't give a fuck
about nobody's life.
What do you mean?
What do you mean?
I mean, my brother had died.
That was the last of my family.
And I was just like, I'm about to die too.
So fuck everybody.
Whoa.
So you probably got me an award.
Yeah.
That was a probably one.
My death energy, I'm better, man.
Like I did.
If it was between 2010 and 2014,
them years was some samurai years.
Yeah, I was literally beheading mother fuckers.
I didn't give a fuck.
In fact, when I was a UR on stage, I heard, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo What the fuck? What the fuck? Oh, that's it, right? How you get, yeah.
You were killing.
Oh, man.
And then you jumped off the stage.
Yeah, that's when I was, yeah.
Yeah, you jumped off the stage
and there was like this white kid in the front.
And you did something, right?
And then I remember being backstage
and the wall, I was behind this wall.
This is true.
And it started shaking.
Yes. Oh, yes. He. It's sort of shaking. Yes.
Oh yes.
He's talking about bleachers shaking.
Oh, no, no, no.
What?
They was bleachers?
I can see.
Can I say bleachers less?
You always say bleachers.
Oh, okay.
I'm the story on that stage.
I say bleachers.
Yeah, no bleachers.
Yeah, yeah.
But it was like this, right?
And here's another deal, dude.
I have witnesses. Not witnesses. Jeff Will's. Jeff Will's. You know this, right? And here's another deal, dude. I have witnesses.
I have not witnesses.
Jeff Will's.
Jeff Will's.
You know Jeff, right?
Oh, Superman.
Yeah, that comes, well, Superman.
And my agent Matt Blake was there.
Matt Blake.
And they were like calm down to me.
They're talking me down.
They're going, because I was, like, you were killing
so bad I was like, um, but you're Bobby Lee?
I understand, I understand, I understand.
But when I wacked up there, I could feel it immediately
that I just didn't like me.
Oh, stop it.
You, let's, let's, let's,
let's be, I wouldn't like you.
Let's, let's, let's, let's,
just like they were high.
Maybe they were high. They were high. Yeah, high off of you. Yeah, but they got too high off like you. That's just like they were high. Maybe they were high.
They were high.
Yeah, high off of you.
Yeah, but they got too high off of you.
They owed OD, baby.
And what I'm saying is I walked up there,
I was supposed to do it out 20 minutes.
Yeah.
They owed OD after less, and I,
I don't even remember what I was doing.
Two minutes in.
Two minutes in, I walked off stage.
They're my only remember what jokes I was doing.
I don't know, I don't know,
you were just killing so bad.
And I remember being in a room in the back.
Cause they had these little shacks.
Shacks, yeah, yeah.
My shirt was off, I was sweating, I tears in my eyes.
And I literally went, what happened?
Like I was in a car accident. You mean blackout what happened, like I was in a car accident.
You mean blackout?
Yeah, like I was in a car accident.
I go, what happened?
Oh my God.
Yeah, Leslie killed and you walked out.
And so then, I don't know if you remember,
the week later we had to do it in Irvine.
Oh my God.
So I was on that?
Yeah.
So we switched, I switched the line up.
You don't remember none of that.
I go, I wanna go after this person, not Leslie.
Yeah.
And it worked better.
A lot of people started saying that. Yeah, but I worked better. Well, a lot of people started saying that.
Yeah, but I'm just saying you were a beast up there.
You killer.
You see, and this is the thing, no,
about that, it's so crazy because like,
if I was a man, it wouldn't be a big deal.
It wouldn't be a big deal.
Like, it's just a big deal because I'm a woman.
And that's the thing that drives me insane is because it's like,
I can do the same work, I can do the same, And that's the thing that drives me insane is because it's like,
I can do the same work, I can do the same,
being a ditches and shit,
but it's a novelty that I made it.
You know what I'm saying?
Like why would not be as strong as everybody else?
I'm competing with it.
Like, you know, I mean, of course I'm competing with the men
because yeah, ain't no bitch going to fuck with me.
I mean, because the women, I love y'all.
This is very respectful that I'm saying
is this way, okay?
Because I always get in trouble,
but I'm very honest person.
Okay.
The women, the women, they're starting to figure it out.
I'm starting to see something that are figuring it out,
but the women are not figuring out
that they don't have to be women on stage.
Like when you walk on stage, we know you are woman.
You got titties asked, you look like a woman.
If you're a woman, you're a fucking woman.
So you don't have to do woman jokes.
Oh, I'm a woman, hear me roar.
You just have to be fucking funny.
From that point of view, yeah.
Yeah, so it's just like, like, I don't know.
I just, I feel like women are always,
like you're fighting against something that you produce
in in your head.
Like, I put it like this.
When I first started performing, I used to wear skirts.
I used to wear heels.
I used to dress up.
I used to do all of that.
Wow.
But I realized it was, it was not playing against me,
but it was playing against me because you have to be
a real performer.
You have to perform for everybody.
So when I'm walking on stage and I'm dressed like that,
that gives everybody the assumption
that I think I'm the shit, especially in women's eyes.
When I walk up, it's like, oh, this bitch,
didn't she cute?
And then they look at the man and be like,
oh, do my man think she cute?
Does my man wanna fuck her?
So that's all going on with the first three minutes
that I'm performing.
That's why I always tell girls, T-shirt, jeans, tennis shoes.
Put it, you, I'm not saying you can't look pretty.
Please do not take that and say that let's just end it.
Good.
I'm saying it's like going to work, like go to work, go to work,
and don't concentrate on if you're pretty or not or if you're,
I can't, does that make the, I'm, I mean, I mean,
I think it has changed.
I think when I started, it was like that,
and like I remember people, like Sarah Silverman
and people would like dress down, you know what I mean?
And they would, you know, just put themselves
out in a certain way, right?
But I think that now,
um, I was out in a certain way, right? But I think that now, um... ...
...
He looks for your back and your sleep, deep, deep, deep, in,
He looks sleep.
You guys, I have, you know, not a mansion,
but I have several rooms in my little abode.
How many rooms?
Three. Wow.
Not like a normal family, but I don't have a family.
But what I do have, see, every room has a helix mattress in it.
Do you know why?
One day when I do have family, what if I had an uncle
or a first cousin that ever came over,
I can give the most pleasant sleep, you know,
better than any hotel that they could ever sleep in.
Wow.
Because these mattresses are unique.
They're the best in the business.
And everybody is unique.
By the way, you are too, man.
Thanks.
And everyone sleeps differently.
Man, I sleep outward, dude, and downward.
Yeah.
And sideways.
Great.
All you have to do is take a quiz and they will match you
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For example, like I run hot when I sleep,
I'm also a side sleeper, so I got matched
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And the lux is a really cool option.
It's a little bit thicker than the regular mattress.
I love it.
You spend a third of your life, maybe even more like me.
Yeah, I'd be like to be horizontal.
Can I tell you about enhanced cooling, dude?
Please do.
It's the best, dude.
You know why?
Why?
A lot of people sleep over hot heat.
That's true.
That's pretty common.
Overheat that night, I mean.
That's pretty common, right?
But helix, dude.
They have enhanced cooling features, dude.
God.
I know, dude.
It's almost as if I'm like explaining a scientific, futuristic world that things don't
exist, but they exist now.
And why don't you, it's real, dude.
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I mean, you see like, Steph Toll of,
and so these girls are just out there, just be-
They're doing who they will. Oh yeah.
And that's good, because it's like embracing that part
of comedy, like I put it like this,
like I don't let me go, do not fucking bring me up with no,
y'all ready for a female,
because I will fucking destroy you,
like I'm gonna on stage,
because it's just like saying,
y'all ready for a female?
Oh, you ready for a unicorn?
You guys ready for a billi-go?
You guys ready for an object that you've never seen before?
Like you don't do that with me and hey, you're ready for a man?
You know what I'm saying?
It's like it's so infuriating, shit like that.
When you say hey, you're ready for a female,
you are setting a precedent stuff like, hey,
a bitch about to come up here and talk about dick.
Lauren talk about me and it was like,
so get ready.
You about to hear a bunch of complaining.
No, introduce me as a fucking comment,
because I'm gonna whoop your mother fucking ass.
When I get on stage, when people introduce me as like that,
I destroy them.
I destroy them because it's like,
you don't have no respect for me.
Like you think you're showing respect.
I had to do, I ain't even tell you who it is.
I had to do it introduce me.
He was like, yeah, you know, she always, you know,
fighting with me and stuff.
And some shit, and I was like, did we fuck?
And you were like, did we fuck?
What kind of introduction is that?
Yeah, yeah.
It was because a lot of men are very, you, I don't care.
You're fucking
misogynistic motherfuckers, are just very much like,
and I used to tell people, like,
and again, I can't just get ready to throw names
and shit out, but I throw names.
But love calling.
I often used to, I often used to tell Colin,
Colin, I used to tell him a lot,
and guys like Colin, comics like Colin,
or not Colin, it's not just Colin,
it's not just Colin who does it,
but it's like they treat everybody like their bitches.
So when I say that, you treat me like your bitch,
I'm not your bitch, I'm your peer.
So if I text you, you text me back.
I'm not fucking you.
If I'm texting you about business, you text me back. I'm not fucking you. If I'm texting you about business, you text me back.
You're like my friends, you're my friend,
you put yourself in that friend lane, I'm not your bitch.
Like I used to have to tell my brother that.
I used to be like, I'm not one of your bitches.
I'm not one of your bitches.
Like you have to really sometimes tell me in that,
hey, I'm your work, hey, we're peers.
I'm not your hoe.
Don't treat me like your hoe.
I used to, and, and, but what I treated you always like a killer though.
Oh, no, yeah, Bobby, this, whenever I hear anything,
like we have, I was like, Bobby has my number.
Like, I think I saw you on the podcast talking to Andrew Santino and he was like,
you know, I was kind of hurt because I think
Leslie was mad.
I was like, if I'm mad at you,
you know, I come up to you and be like,
Bobby, bring your mother fucking ass over here.
Yeah, you are.
Because we are, we're like, Bobby didn't save my fucking life.
Three or four fucking times.
No, real talk.
Like, he don't talk about it, but I talk about it.
Bobby has written me checks for me to fucking,
and let me tell you this, and I never told you this,
the lesson I learned when I came to you the fourth time,
and you was like, nah, I did?
No, but it was, no, but it was in such a respectful way
because it really, I had started depending on you doing that.
So it was just like, nah, I can't do that.
Because in you, it was. Because I got the money.
Yeah, yeah.
Does that make sense?
It was like, don't, no, you, you're not stepping out
on your shit.
It was, it was, it was, it was,
this is when you were still up and cut.
Yeah, but it was, I think this is what happened.
I'll just be honest.
So it's like, I always, because,
when you were asking, I was like,
it's like investing in something you know is gonna like
Go yeah, so it didn't feel like the money was I think at that time
I think the fourth time you asked I was going through some things
Actually that I couldn't do it, but like yeah, I would have done it for like I think maybe ten more time
I think maybe 10 more times. Because that's what life is.
Yeah, yeah.
That's so frightening.
It's even, but to me, but to me,
that happened on purpose, that happened on purpose.
Oh, I see it.
Because it taught me a lesson.
Yeah, yeah.
It taught me a lesson.
It taught me, too, how to give money, too.
Like, I help a lot of people,
but if you're not helping yourself,
and I was not helping myself at that time,
I was like, oh no, I can go ask Bobby.
Do you give him, I'm saying,
and that's not a good attitude to have.
That's not the right attitude to have.
And you get pay me back.
And of course, I mean, and it's so great.
No, let me tell you about that shit.
So crazy.
So crazy.
No, okay, no, for real.
I don't even know if you remember this.
Oh my God.
And there was a time when I was so broke.
So I asked 14 people for $100,
cause I needed rent.
So I was like, if I asked 14 people,
everybody got $100. You know what I'm saying? That's so smart. No, I mean, you I was like, if I asked 14 people, everybody got $100, you know what I'm saying?
That's so smart.
No, I mean, you ain't got, if you got 14 shares,
I didn't have 14 friends.
I just randomly asking motherfuckers like,
yo, can I borrow $100?
And I was getting it.
Like, and then some people would give you two.
So then you ain't got to have, you know, so I had,
and I did that with a couple of people.
So Steve Renziski gave me money.
I think I remember in everyone's gave me money, I think I remember Ian Erwin's gave me money.
Erick Griffin gave me money, which is a funny story.
Erick, Erick, I asked him for $200,
and I hadn't asked him before.
So he mistakenly texted me,
because he thought he's texting this girl.
And he was like,
he was like, let's exacit for money again.
Oh yeah.
I remember that, I remember that.
I remember that. And he was like, I remember. Mother of that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember that I remember like, fuck you dude, like whatever. Anyway, so when I made it, when I got up there, whatever,
I wasn't, I swear to God,
because whenever I give money, I never expect people
to pay me back.
So, on any one day, I was like,
people would be acting kind of shitty.
And I thought you was mad at me.
I didn't think you was mad at me for the money.
I just thought everybody had an attitude because I had came back mad at me. I didn't think you was mad at me for the money. I just thought everybody had an attitude
because I had came back after SNL.
And yes, I'm a fucking comic.
You know how long I've been doing this shit?
You know how long I've been, I've been bumping,
I've been bumping, you know how I've been bumping.
So I would come in and do spots.
And yes, I was bumping some people,
but it's like, that's the right of passage type shit
that I thought, you know what I'm saying? But again, but it's like, that's the right of passage type shit that I thought, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But again, because it's me and because I used to hang out with everybody, everybody's like,
oh well, why are you doing it?
It was such a big noise.
I mean, till Bill Burr and Neil Brennan going like, yeah, she should call.
What the fuck?
She should call.
And I'm like, Mother fuckers like, like, it's kind of a vanish that I'm coming through.
I'm like, do you say that to Chris Rock?
Do you say that to Dave Shepard?
Like, no, for real.
Like, I'm not saying that I'm those people,
but it's not like some ragly ass bitch coming through
and doing some bullshit ass jokes.
It was your time.
And I was funny.
So it was, and then I was always known
for doing 20, 25 fucking minutes
because I can. Like, so it was, and then I was always known for doing 20, 25 fucking minutes because I can.
So it was very annoying because it's like, you're only doing that because it's me or because
it's I'm a female, that's fucking can do that shit and it's fucking annoying.
Whitney, Whitney come is this one, Whitney, Whitney told me she was like, you gotta start
treating these motherfuckers like, you work with them, they're your work employee people.
They're not your friends.
You gotta fucking really know that these people
will fuck them like, you know, like people going back
to Emily, like, okay, okay, let me say something.
Oh, sorry.
No, no, cause I was gonna go, you go, you go, you go.
You finished, let me finish.
You finished first.
Anyway, anyway, cause we'll put a pin in that shit.
I've put a pin in that'll put a pin in that shit.
I'll put a pin in that shit.
I'll put a pin in that shit.
It's a negative.
I'm just gonna go.
No, no, but put a pin in it.
And we'll come back.
Anyway, anyway, anyway, cause I'm trying to finish it.
I'm trying to figure out.
Okay, Emily, Emily.
No, the money.
No, the money, money.
So, one day I was like, you know, and then Lenny was like,
hey, yo, did you pay them people back that you borrowed money from? And I was like, you know, and then Lenny was like, hey, yo, did you pay them people back that you borrowed money from?
And I was like, holy shit.
You know how you just don't, you know how you,
I swear, I was like, that is like, yeah.
It's no payin' for it, bitch, payin' back, you know what I'm sayin'?
You can payin' for it, but payin' back.
And I swear, I swear it was more of like,
I wasn't tryin' to disrespect nobody or not payin' back. it was more of like,
I wasn't trying to disrespect nobody
or not paying back, it was more of like,
oh shit, I need to pay these people back.
I didn't even fucking think that I owe people money.
So I went got bottles of champagne
and like envelopes and stuff and just like gave everybody
like that I can remember,
cause I'm pretty sure that some more
of those fucking fuckers that I don't fucking remember.
I hope they come up to me and tell me,
the old me like 200 and then I give it to you.
I probably don't lie though.
Yeah.
I gotta go get the life.
But it was like, I'm giving,
I wanted to give everybody the money back
and it was a trip because when I did do that,
it was, I was like holy shit.
It almost felt like a weight off of me.
I can't explain it.
It was like, it shit. It almost felt like a weight off of me. I can't explain it.
It was like, it was a lighter atmosphere.
Like it was more of like everybody's like,
okay, so she does respect the fact that this happened
and we supported her and we were woping.
And it's like, I never ever wanted anyone
to know that I didn't appreciate that.
Right, or that you didn't remember.
Right, right, or remember that shit.
That's so, and it's just so crazy because I'm just was so in the game that. Right, or that you didn't remember. Right, right, or remember that shit. That's so, and it's just so crazy
because I'm just was so in the game
that you go, oh these are people like,
like you do your family,
like you brought money from your uncle,
you don't think, oh I got to pay my uncle.
I mean, that's how it works in my family.
Like when I lend money, it's gone.
I don't ever see it back.
Right, right, but it was, I was glad that I did that
because it was a signal,
and because I knew, I knew you didn't really need it
And I knew that I wanted to show you that hey my fuck. I remember when you was there my bed
Is he probably didn't even cash a chuck? Oh?
I didn't I refused yeah, you're
Look look go ahead, no go ahead
I'm going to go ahead you get yeah right yeah, I'm going to do it right now.
I'm not going to catch it.
I'm going to just talk right now.
Yeah, go ahead.
Go ahead.
I don't know what I was saying.
Wait, my assistant's thinking I'm not here.
Oh, okay, yes.
I got him.
Yes, I found him.
Because I was like, yo, which house is it?
Yeah, yeah.
When Bobby came out, thank God.
So here's, okay, let me just say what I was gonna say, okay.
Okay.
You said pretty much what I was going to say.
Anyway, but I just let me just double down
on what you're saying, okay.
Number one, you've given me, so number one, right?
You gave me a bottle of champagne and a note,
and then also a check, okay?
I read the note.
As soon as I saw the check,
I'm like, first of all, I think it's,
you paid me way too much.
No, it was, it was, anyway.
All right, give me a face, $1,000.
I'll go, I'll go, I'll go.
All right, so anyway.
Because I remember, I grabbed the check
in my dresser drawer, I'll never cash it.
That's so crazy.
And I, but I'm gonna frame it.
That's so sweet.
Yeah, yeah, because it's like a sweet thing.
Number two, okay.
You also, out of all my friends, for my birthday,
I think you were the, you were an Andrew,
are the only ones that gave me physical gifts.
Oh, she gave me 12 pair of like African pants.
How you say hi?
I have six of them.
You say hi, I, I, exactly.
I think that was like three pairs.
That was three, it was three.
So I have, I have one of them.
What, wait, wait, stop, stop.
Why can't you just let that go?
Because I want
people who was like why was she
well-pairs of
Hey, they're so cute.
They're so cute.
They're so cute.
They're so cute.
They're a little parachute pants.
Oh man, they're from me and end women.
They're so comfortable.
They call Buddha pants.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
What does this insult think to Buddha?
But anyway,
Oh, that is. Where does it come from? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm sorry. It's come Stavros pants. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's this insult thing to boot up? But anyway, um, that is, yeah, I'm sorry. It's come Stavros pants. Stavros pants. Yeah, I just
call them. Yeah. So anyway, you gave me those pants, right? And honestly, I,
because I have been thinking about, because I'll have to admit, let me admit to you.
Yes. That I, what, that I was one of the guys that were like, why is she bumping?
I was that, right?
But then I was like, why am I mad about it?
Because everyone else does it, right?
And then when you gave me, paid me back,
I didn't realize the connection.
But when you paid me back and you wrote that lovely letter,
it was just like, maybe that was it
because I ever since then, I've just been like, so at peace with it, you know what I mean?
And I don't, it doesn't, I didn't connect the two either.
I don't know if it's that, maybe, I don't know.
And that's my fault, you know what I mean?
Because when I was talking, when Lenny was telling me about it,
I was like, God damn Lenny, I can't believe that I let that,
that's something that, the first, one of the first things I should have did.
But it's a lesson,
and because I was just like,
when I was like,
what is what?
Why would he think that I'm mad at him?
I would tell him I'm mad at him.
Because when I saw it, I was like,
that I was not hurt,
but I was just more of like,
oh, y'all motherfuckers get on my fucking nerves,
you fucking children.
Like it's just like,
like dealing with the comedy stories
is a hard place.
If I can tell you, for me,
comedy story was like,
ooh, like a home base.
When my brother died, oh my God.
It was where I went, I ate there, I've slept,
I fucked there, I fucked.
A couple of times. I fucked there. I've slept, I fucked there, I fucked.
A couple of times.
I fucked there.
I'm so glad you've said that.
Because I always hear about just like male comics,
like, fucking at the colonies.
So I'm so glad you fucked there.
You think the males is fucked.
I was fucked.
I was fucked.
But like, I'm like, you know, that place is like,
it's like a heart place for me.
And this is real talking.
You can ask anyone, I don't do no clubs outside of comedy stories.
I think the last time I did the improv, I was like, yep, not coming back here no more.
Because it's still the same thing, it's still the same type of respect.
It's still like, okay, I put it like this.
When I was before SNL, I used to grade them like,
like how fuck people, like, okay, comedy store,
let me fuck the shit out of them.
I can fuck in a parking lot in a tree.
Like, comedy store was, let me fuck the shit out of them.
Laugh factory, let me grab her titties in tongue-kissed,
but she won't fuck me, right?
Improv don't even call me back.
Improv don't even text me back.
Oh, no, no, no, no.
It's now, but it's like, now I don't want to get,
you don't forget.
It's not even that.
I don't even, at that place, don't have
a comedic atmosphere for me.
The Improv makes me always feel like I owe them something.
Oh.
Oh.
Does that make sense?
Like, it's a lot of things.
See, people don't understand that I've known everybody
25 years before they became famous.
So I've known all these people and they've done dirty shit
to you and you go, hey, motherfucker, I remember,
don't try to act like, oh, you would not believe the audacity of this business
of some of the people that have walked up to me
that have done real dirt shit.
And oh, I am, oh, and when I say that it's the funniest thing
to be like, get the fuck out of my face.
Oh, do you know how many people that I've done that too?
I'd be like, this been like, why are you talking to me?
Can you teach me how to do that?
It's not teaching, it's like just fuck.
I throw one point of view.
I don't want to get a fight with you.
I know.
I don't want to get a fight with you,
but I'm going to, I think I'm going to screend
to the forest to see what happens.
Okay.
All right, so I have my flashlight.
I've got my ass, let me go in there, right?
Okay.
So, but, yeah, yeah, yeah.
But, be on, like, let's see.
But, before one makes it,
there's so many comics in LA, right?
And it's like they can't open their hearts to everybody.
Well, it's not even about,
I don't know, it's not even about opening.
It's not even about opening their hearts
it's about just being respectful
because I've always been very respectful.
Like, I, listen, I'm hardcore as far as when it come to New
Jack's and comedy because I love stand up.
And me and you both are at the type of business.
Let me just say something, okay.
So in 1999, right, I told my manager, I go,
I need an agent and she's like, okay, well,
so she called ICM at the time and I had a meeting with one of the agents and the agent
looks at me from across the room and I'm going to say his name because he's still around
and I love him now, but he looks from across the room and he goes, can I be honest with
you kid? I go, yeah, he goes, you're never gonna make it. And I go, what do you mean?
He's like, you're Asian, you're kind of weird.
You know what I mean?
I mean, I think you're funny,
but there's just, I know what's out there
in terms of roles and stuff.
And they just don't write stuff for you.
And so there's just no way I could ever,
you're not gonna make it, right?
So I remember going into the elevator with Abby,
my man is, I still have Abby, and I tears in my eyes.
Right?
And I was like, should I just quit?
He said, no, no, no, we'll find somebody.
And I eventually did.
But so that eight years later, maybe, nine years later,
I was on Mad.
And David Salisman, the owner of Mad TV,
was like, I'm looking for this type of performer I want.
On Mad and I go, here's the guy, and I told him a name.
And then I walked this guy through the process, auditioned this and that, but this guy's
agent is that guy for my CM.
Right?
So he gets the show, my friend. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha? But in my peripheral, I felt an energy to my left.
It was that guy in a suit and he was standing there
proud of his client.
How did it feel though for you?
But at that point, I- Did it get it?
Yeah, he was performing live on the-
Oh, live live.
Like we're shooting the show.
Oh, okay.
We're shooting the show.
My friend got it.
He's a sketch all for him,
live studio audience.
He has agents right here,
the guy that said,
I was never gonna make it.
And as soon as I realized who it was,
I know at that point I won.
I don't have to say anything or do anything.
And I looked at the guy and he was like,
hello, and I hugged him. And I go, hey dude, congratulations on like, Hello. And I hugged him.
And I go, hey dude, congratulations on him.
You know what I mean?
Okay.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm not going to wait.
Hold on.
Wait, wait, wait.
Wait, wait.
So what I'm saying is, is that,
I'm just saying, I know, I know.
Hold on, hold on.
I respect you.
He is just fucking calm down for a second.
I'll let you go, all right.
Let me just fit, let me put a little fucking bow on it, right?
It's just that at the end of the day,
you know, he was wrong, this guy,
and people are wrong.
They think it's things wrong.
And I think without, I think that when people say no,
it gives me energy to persevere.
So I don't know, I mean, so go ahead.
I agree, I agree with that with that as far as like,
because we've all had those stories,
like I have six or seven of those that you,
but I respect.
I respect you too.
I respect how you handled it.
But,
Who would you have done?
Dropkick that motherfucker.
As soon as I even realized this press But who would you have done? Dropkick that motherfucker.
As soon as I even realized this press has been like,
oh motherfucker, you like Chinese people now?
You like us now, bitch!
Now you like us, bitch!
Enjoy my, enjoy my homeboy!
Wow!
You would have done that?
What?
Yeah, okay.
Okay, okay, okay.
And I'm not gonna say these people,
because then it's like, now I'm out there.
But I just, in a row,
I scave two motherfuckers that need it to be,
and you know these people, I'll tell you after that.
Okay, okay, okay.
But like I said, Bobby,
I don't, there's a lot of motherfuckers
that I can stop and go fuck you and ask, fuck you and ask.
But it's like, like you said, I'm like,
I'm, they're paying their debt
by not being able to have any time from me or any space.
Like there's some motherfuckers that I just walk past.
I don't say shit, you know?
But I do respect what you're saying though,
because it's like, yeah, I mean,
I see from both sides, I mean.
Me too, because I mean, there's some people
who really are that fucking delusional
in the way that they treat people.
And they never ever feel the consequences of that.
They just walk around like they have done nothing wrong.
And still getting clients.
And still getting clients.
That's the thing that I'm saying.
But like these people that I've checked,
they're still dealing with people
and they're still treating them like shit.
Like this, let me tell you,
this business has a whole needs just a fucking re-haul
where agents and managers have the power that they have.
They don't actually have no fucking power.
They're fucking high paid receptionists.
And I'm sorry, you don't get the job.
You get the job.
You get the job.
And they have to go through them to get to you.
And they're receptionist.
And I'm not, listen, I let my agents and my managers know.
I don't work for you.
You work for me.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Does that make sense?
Here's what drives me crazy.
I thought about this there a day.
OK, it's like every job that I get,
whenever I'm on the job,
I talk to the director or the producers and they go,
oh yeah, so we wrote this for you
or you know what I mean,
you were always gonna get that, right?
So in my mind, I'm like,
what did the agents do?
They just received a phone call.
That's that, they're, right.
I paid, and then you're paying 10% to two people.
Now, I'm not, listen,
I'm not saying that there's not agents that they don't'm not, listen, I'm not saying that there's not
agents out there don't fucking go and take,
they're not saying that there's not meant,
but y'all have shown to me in the years
that I've been in this business that she useless.
You're fucking useless.
And you don't change your real fucking,
like this is what I've been telling them,
like I've been through managers and agents
because I have to explain to them.
Listen, I was at SNL.
I know how celebrities are.
And sometimes how you have to hold their hand
and take them through shit.
Some people really don't get it.
I'm not that person.
I understand what your job is.
I understand what my job is.
But I need to make sure that you're selling me correctly
because this, I'm not, listen,
my 20s and 30s, I was just as funny.
And I did all the things.
I did all the formulas.
I did all the put the square in the box.
It never worked for me.
Even with stuff that was, it never worked
because that was not the formula for me.
Until I found out who I was as a comic
and figured it out that I was Leslie fucking Jones.
And it was really, after my brother died and it was really after my brother died,
it was more of like, oh, you gotta step the fuck out
on who the fuck you are.
So the crazy hair, that's where the crazy hair came from.
That's, oh my God, the crazy hair came from,
I just didn't wanna comb my hair.
I was going through morning,
so I didn't wanna comb my hair.
So it was, but it was emotionally for everyone else,
a freedom thing.
Like when people would see the Mohawk,
they would literally go,
I just wanna know what this bitch is doing.
And then I was just murder, you know what I'm saying?
So let me tell you something,
my brother's death brought on a thing of where
I had to even learn how to like myself.
I didn't even know I didn't like myself.
I didn't know that.
I didn't know that some of the things
that I was doing was to hide what I was. What didn't you myself. I didn't know that. I didn't know that some of the things that I was doing
was to hide what I was.
What didn't you like about your friend?
You know that I was like,
I was going out straight manicured and my hair always done
and always like,
I could be because I'm tall.
I'm tall and I sweat and I'm loud
and I'm not always,
and I'm not Beyonce, I'm not gorgeous.
So I need to compensate for that with earrings
and stuff that people is gonna,
but when I started embracing that bitch,
she was a fucking warrior.
Like you some mother fucking bitch,
you can kill justice hard as any male comic.
When I started really realizing that,
it was like fuck everybody.
So I'm about to die anyway.
I'm gonna kill about 70, 700 people on the way down.
Listen to me, I'll do something.
So I don't know much, so your parents are gone.
Where'd you grow up?
I grew up.
I grew up in Memphis, well, everywhere
because my dad was in the army,
but Memphis, North Carolina,
because my dad was in the army,
then we moved here when I was 14.
I see.
My parents and my mom and dad passed away
six months between each other in 2000.
Wow.
And 2000.
No one knew that shit.
Dude, I was traveling and doing gigs and shit.
I was living in my home girls apartment
when all that shit was happening.
So, and then my brother died in 2010.
And your brother was older, younger.
He was younger.
He was 38.
He was 38.
And how did he pass up? I have no idea. Okay. I still don't. He was younger, he was 38. He was 38. And how did he pass it?
I have no idea.
Okay.
I still don't, he died in the park.
Sorry.
It's tragic.
It's tragic.
Murder.
I don't think it was murder.
I think everybody, everybody think,
I think it was hard, but I think he was sick already.
A man, him, didn't have the best relationship
and I had to put him out because he was starting,
we were starting to fight, like physically fight.
And I can't fight a man.
You know, it's just was like, so he went back to his friend's house and then he just ended
up on the street and just he ain't survived Bobby.
I don't make me cry.
It's very sad because it's like for those years that I tortured myself, I was like, it was my fault.
Like, it's my fault.
Like, why didn't I just put up with it?
Why didn't I just, he would be, and everybody keeps going,
no, he would have still died because he was dying already.
You know what I'm saying?
So, because he died so quickly, and it was just so many things wrong with him.
So, you know, it was like, there was a drug, was it, no, it wasn't,
it wasn't. My brother didn't do drugs. He smoked weed, you know, he drank. But I think at this point,
when he figured out that there was nothing, I think he just gave up. I think it was just more of
giving up. You know, people say it was a heart attack. The deaf certificate said it was a heart
attack diabetes. That time, I don't know. We still don't know because they found him in the park
and I was doing a movie in Atlanta
that called me in three days later, he was gone.
I'm sorry.
But it's just, after that, it was like,
well, what the fuck am I gonna do?
You know what I'm saying?
I'm still living.
What do I have to contribute?
Yeah, after when he passed you were just like fuck it like I after he passed
I was laying in the middle of the floor when Ian Edwards called me for a gig. I was just
I was just on the floor. I was just like this is where they're gonna find me. Yeah. There's no reason
for me to get up. Yeah, and you know what that always reminds me of this lethal weapon when male Gibson was like
I was laying on the floor and now I looked under and saw that pin and there was my wife
couldn't clamp my house.
It was like that moment and Ian Edwards called me and he was like, yo, somebody didn't show
for a spot, come through the spot.
I said, if I had others for you, you said, if I had others, I'm up.
I got up and I went in, I put in my clothes, I looked in the mirror because I had just
got my hair done, it was straight and it was cut.
But it was that mohawk and I was like, that shit looked dope, I'm aware it like that because
I don't feel like doing my hair.
I love Ian Edwards.
Yeah.
Shout out to him.
Yeah.
And Ian Edwards gave me $900.
I remember and I said I paid them back.
But yeah, after that, it was more of now,
okay, what is making people laugh about you?
What is it that you're very pure, you're pure from passion.
People don't understand that that is not something you can't copy.
So many people have tried to copy what I do.
They try to do the, you can't commentate
because you don't know where it's coming from.
It's coming from a real place.
It's coming from a place of real passion.
So that is what I grabbed on to.
I'm always wondering why you're my superhero.
I think that's what you're a store comic
because a store comic, usually I look at people
that are like, I feel like you were developed there.
You know what I mean?
And it's like, you don't see anything like that
in other places.
And that's what I'm saying, Bobby,
so when I came all back,
Comedy Store was my home.
So I didn't think it was a problem with me
coming to do spots, because it's like,
hey, one of our own made it, and she's coming back
and blessing the fucking club,
because when I do spots, it's like,
Leslie Jones was there.
Like, I can bring that now to the club now.
Like I'm not, I don't even take the money that they give me.
I like, I give it to the waitresses.
Like anybody give me, I give it to the waitresses
because I love the way I make sure I tip the waitress,
make sure I tip the lot people.
Like I, it's like a joy because you guys was here with me.
Like we all hung with each other because, you know,
comedy store blew up a little bit after,
I mean, you know, they started getting better,
but, you know, I was there for them,
they was there for me, I didn't give a fuck
if you're a checks bounce, I didn't give a fuck.
Because I loved this fucking club,
and that's really was really what we were.
Yeah, we were there in the Dark Ages.
We were there when there was nothing.
And, yo, I remember just being like,
with Paulie one time in the park, like, Paulie, yo, this should be the number one club
in the fucking, in the fucking,
y'all got three rooms, you have three rooms.
I was like, they all should be full.
This is like the dopest,
you have the dopest comics coming in here doing time.
Why is this my fucking not full?
And I'm taking with Adam,
I think Adam is the one who turned it around.
It's just started becoming so like the play, like it still is.
It still is my fucking, I love Adam.
It's still my joy, it's still my joy at comedy store, you know?
But it's just like when you make it,
and I don't know if you're a test of this,
but people be, and I'm going through it
because I feel like I'm a female, I'm a black female,
and it's just like, oh, this bitch, you know what I'm saying?
And what, and since Sultan is like, yo, do you,
do you not remember that I was with you
doing these two o'clock spots?
Like, why, I would be happy for you,
why are you not happy?
Right in the trenches.
Yeah.
I would ask you something, you might get angry at this.
Oh, God.
I'm gonna, I'm not.
I'm not. People think that I'm always angry.
No, I am like the whole thing.
I'm passionate.
I'm passionate too.
I'm passionate too.
I'm passionate too.
And I'm gonna ask the question.
And we use hands.
Yeah, we use hands a lot.
Okay, so I want to say something, okay?
Yes sir.
So they're just a proposal question.
Okay.
But why can't you, I just see me out.
All right, why can't you call in and then just hear me out
and get a spot and say special guest
because you know, Ali doesn't go up as Ali,
she has a different name.
But that's what I do now.
Oh, you do it, that's what I do now.
I think that's also what is,
because what happens is when you're on a lineup
and you're off to the side, there's a pop-in
that you can go in any of the, which is fine, that's how poppins work. But it's like
sometimes it just fucks up people's timing because some
people have two shows that night and they show up. They have
a 915 show at the store, you go up, right? But then they have
to be at the improv at 945. It fucks it up. So it, but I think
doing it, yeah, because I'm not, because I'm like, you're telling me something that I fucking did.
Do you understand?
I understand what that is.
I understand having to show it to the live factory
and then wanting to have to come back
and having to fucking wait for Dane Cook or Eddie Griffith
or Dave Chappelle or whoever the fuck comes in there
and do a spot.
So yeah, I know that.
Does that make sense?
So it was, I don't do hours like they do. I know, I know. I can do a spot. So yeah, I know that. Does that make sense? So it was, I don't do hours
like they do. I know I know. Do a spot. So I get what you're saying. That's why you do it now. And
that's I think it's a better system. No, but I do after, but they don't. I know, but this is
saying. But I don't listen to this. I don't. Yeah, but let me just. I'm saying, Bobby. Yeah, yeah.
I get what I understand. And that's why I started texting and letting Richie
and all of them know.
But you not understanding that these people didn't do that.
I understand that.
I understand that.
And I understand that.
I am a fucked up thing that I, because I'll tell you why.
It's culture has changed.
It's different.
Okay, let me say something.
Can I be honest with you?
I think my instincts are always right.
I think that.
No, always.
You used to tell me how to audition.
You said you go into an audition act like you don't give a fuck.
Like, this is something that was on your schedule.
Like, okay, how many?
Yeah, so, okay, in audition me.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Okay, thanks, kid.
I know what someone needy, like, oh my God,
I started doing that shit and that shit works.
Yeah, yeah. And then here's like, when I was in South Africa, many, many years ago, I started doing that shit. And that shit works. Yeah, yeah.
And then here's like, when I was in South Africa
many, many years ago, I was a kid.
I called CAA and the kid, they signed the kid
and the kid became a huge star.
Trevor, no, I didn't.
See?
But anyway, I wanna say, listen, I wanna say this, okay.
I love you.
You and I will be good for the rest of our lives.
You know what I mean?
You and I will always have open communication.
I hope so.
I hope so too as well.
And do you have anything you want to plug?
You know, I got my book, Leslie.
Yeah, yeah.
So what, you can get them now Leslie?
Yeah, I do your book and people say the audio book is fire.
You do the air in here.
You do the air in here. I didn't read shit in the book either. It's all
Me telling stuff. I mean I started reading the book and I was like why am I reading my own book?
I know the story so that's so I just yeah, you know that that right there. Yes. I love that picture
That is so cute. I'm so cute. Yeah. Yeah, it's just down to the mic I had to fight
They wanted to put another mic.
They had a mic that had the big head on it.
It's like, yeah.
A little girl holding a big dick in her hand.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Just put the fucking mic that's in the goddamn picture.
That, you know, two of the dates coming up.
You know, just a lot of little shit happening.
I just did this daily show.
You hosted it, yeah. Yeah, hosted that.
And, you know, just a lot of little projects
that's coming up.
Yeah, yeah.
I have a strike fucked up a lot of shit.
I have a question.
You were in comedy for so long.
When did you finally feel like, oh, like, I'm getting my flowers
finally?
You never feel that way.
I mean, listen, I don't feel like that. Now I
mean, I feel like that I am in a level where I'm Leslie Jones. Like I walk in I'm
Leslie Jones. I feel like I've established that. But as far as flowers like like
how you don't how you haven't seen me like Chris Roxette in my forward like how
you haven't seen me in three Marvel movies already? Or a romance like, you know, it's like they have me
in this box.
You believe that the industry grows,
the industry still is so behind in the way
that they look at actresses, actors, all of that.
And they feel like, oh, she came from messing with her.
So that's what she is.
She's a comedian who does this and this,
but they're not thinking that I can do this.
I can do that.
You have to still show.
It's still a, it's layer after layer after layer,
you have to go, so I'm at this layer,
but I'm not still at the layer where I can just like
people are calling me going,
hey, we want you to be this,
hey, we want you to be this.
And you know, like how am I not some major villain?
Or you know what I'm saying,
a playing Manifala said that type of shit.
You know what I'm saying? So that's the level I would like to get to
but I'm 56 so it's hard because it's like you do have your age
playing even though people don't think I look like I'm 56 is
still in a producer or directors mind they're thinking she's
56 or do you hear what I'm saying so yeah yeah it's just like I
would like to have a lot more going on you know give them saying so? Yeah. Yeah. It's just like I would like to have a lot more going on.
You know what I'm saying?
So we all feel that way.
Yeah.
I don't know if you know that.
I don't know if you know that.
I don't know if you know if you know a single person
doesn't feel that way.
That doesn't feel too like you said the flower thing
is like what is, you get flowers because you are who you are
and you have the flowers.
I'm just letting you know you.
You have the flowers.
Like growing them, I got flowers.
I got flowers.
You know what I'm saying?
Exactly. But do I have a garden? Is the question. I don't I got flowers. You know what I'm saying?
Exactly.
But do I have a garden?
I don't have a garden.
You know what I'm saying?
I don't think all of us ever get a garden.
Does that make sense?
It's so funny.
Kim Jong.
I don't know if you talk about Kim Jong, but Kim Jong, I was hosting the belly room when I was
supposed to be in the belly room for N'Shel.
And Kim Jong walked in with his guitar.
And I remember looking over going,
this is Asian dude, would a guitar.
What is this about, right?
And he was like, can I get some time in it?
And I was like, yeah man, I'll put you up.
I'm just like, fuck it, like this is the belly room.
Like you never know what the fuck's gonna happen.
You have mother fucker got up there and crushed.
RIP, crushed.
And I was like, dude, do you know what the fuck you doing?
He was like, yeah, yeah, I was like, you funny.
It's fuck, I was like, you can come up,
you can do time anytime and that motherfucker blew blue.
I saw him then too.
I was a psych, you're a doctor, what the fuck?
Like you a doctor, you a doctor with a get-tie.
Like what the fuck made you, like you,
you literally went to medical school, motherfucker.
What made you just, just say fuck all that and became a comedian?
And he's so funny.
Kim don't really is funny to me.
I mean.
I knew I was with him and Tram.
Really?
I was me and Steve Bernworthy, the only comics there.
And I went with a dancing in a circle.
You know what I mean?
Oh, this guy, this guy, this guy's gonna be a doctor.
And then he just, way bigger than me now.
No. I think, I'm still dancing.
I'm still dancing.
That's so fun.
I love that guy.
So anyway, Les, I want to say thank you so much for doing this.
Also, we're always open.
If you ever want to plug anything, we have a big audience.
You can always come in to plug.
And we want to say that thank you so much for doing it.
Thank you.
I love you so much.
Yeah, thank you for having me.
And that was a exhilarating.
That was like very, like it was.
Exilarating.
Very therapy, like, because I was like, not in a bad mood, but I was just like, oh, I don't
gonna go do this podcast.
Oh, you killed it on Whitney's.
I mean, this is something you can do too, you know anyway
I love you give a Leslie Jones a round of applause everybody Kulugimu o kisalamat Filiyita buko ba ni ay magabalol
Ulo mo ay amat
Ulo mo na
Ulo mo na
Yog bukia ito ay