TigerBelly - TigerBelly 400!

Episode Date: May 24, 2023

Come celebrate our 400th episode with us! A special guest performance, gifts, fan voicemails, spicy questions, and much more! New merch available on 05/25 9am PT only at www.sleptkingdom.com Live show tickets here www.tigerbellylive.com #TheAccidentals @theaccidentalsquartet  Check out @celebsonsandwiches and buy prints at www.celebsonsandwiches.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Kanye was there. Where at the comedy store? What was his whole energy, what did people say? He just walked I remember he was there for a second He just ran across the street with his another guy. I was like, where the fuck are they going? Uh-huh, and then actually he stayed and watched like show the no Chappelle was there. Oh Shabelle, I guess the weekend the weekday weekday was there. It was there. Yeah, yeah, and then What is it called weekend? That's right from Canada Canadians weekend keep going. Okay, you know some stuff and

I think you know, honestly, I think the mood is are my mood is a little weird because of what you've made me do What did I make you do? You know what you made me do? I didn't know what I was making you do until I made you do it Okay, so this is I'll give you a quick synopsis of Bobby in my weekend. He's like I'm gonna come over I said, okay, fine. Come on over. There's a movie. I think we should watch or movie by the way I because I didn't know all I knew is that it was a Blumhouse movie. I was like, okay Cool, I think yeah, you know, I'm I was I I stumbled on to this thing on tiktok People are like you you guys like watch this movie. Don't watch the trailer. Just watch it and tell me how long you last

So I was like Bobby. We've got a I know I know I know I know but I don't you think we should have seen the trailer I don't think so if we would have seen the trailer. We would have never saw the movie Can you pitch the for the audience? That's the log line. Okay? No, there's no you can't you can't give a log you can't log line But the movie is called soft and quiet and it's not on like the top ten Netflix recommendations or anything like that. I I just like look it if you know what it's about. You're not gonna watch it. Is it well done. Yes Yes. Oh, okay executed. Well. Yes. Why are you complaining? You know, is the acting good pretty good really good realistic, right? Oh, they have all the things is it one shot the whole time. Yeah, but you know what it took four days to shoot

That's what this nerd just said Yes, it's nerd Okay, tell me why it bothered you so much and why did it bother you? You know what I have regrets and I wish that um, I haven't been able to kind of sleep. Well, either me either You fucked me up man. You fucked my mood up You told the you the one that told me to watch you agree Because whenever you recommend something I I watch and what did I say? I was like, I don't know what it's about It could be terrible, but you're like fucking let's roll the dice. Well, will you tell me when I'm risky you like it

And then we had Indian food. We took a break midway through and it was like we had Indian food And then I said we don't have to watch the rest of the movie. What's can doing taking notes, maybe you're taking notes No, what were you doing? I think he's hot. He's our new John. What were you doing? He was texting. Are you high right now? Oh my god, yeah, yeah, I don't care if you're high you just have high eyes right now not because you're Asian, but I'm just I got high eyes, dude. Yeah. Yeah. What? No, no, no, don't do that Because I'm Asian too and I wasn't saying that oh you're you're you're you have Asian eyes. That's why you look high Yeah, anyway, okay, so

We had a halftime show we stopped halfway throughout through the movie and let's eat some Indian food We ate Indian food. I was like, we don't have to watch the rest. You have a spot at the store Why don't you just go and you were like we have to finish it? So that second half was your fault and the second Why would I why would I say that we had to finish it in your mind? I OCD maybe you have to finish Because in my mind, I'm like, there's this has to pay off I mean in your mind, you're like, you know, this is really fucked up. We're watching it's very tense, you know But there's gonna be a great payoff, you know, I mean there's there could be a million ways that this could pay off, right?

Yeah, do they get there? Never I Think that they should have a part two be two. But anyways, you guys watch it. It's about just tell you what it's about. I Can't stop it. I gotta tell you what it's about. All right, give it to us What give it to you? Do you have you heard about the movie? No check it out, bro It's about school teachers man. No, it's no All right, so it opens up with the school teacher. Okay, she's like, you know, um, she's She stops starts off in the toilet. Yeah, and she takes a pregnancy test, right? Yeah, and in your mind and I guess she can't get pregnant. Okay, right?

She starts crying and she's not pregnant. So just the camera follows her out. She goes through she sees a Colombian Clean up a janitor. Why did you say Colombian? That's kind of cool. I thought for sure you're gonna say Mexican You chose a different reason. It was never cuz I'm going cuz I'm growing. I love that. Yeah, I'm growing. I'm getting better person That's a person. I'm like growing. I'm like totally grow. I'm evolved my mind and my eyes. Yeah, what Asian is that guy? What? He's the kind the high kind. Yeah, he's the high guy. No, no, he always seems like a machete type Oh, what's the machete type? What country would you place that on? He's not Korean. There's no way it's Korean. There we go No, you couldn't could not be no because you have a job with you so

I've been mistaken for Korean So how do you explain that? Yeah, um, they had autism. I don't know. Here's it. Here's a hint. See how we came in and out of the brush Cambodian So close Vietnamese really they're close You know what? I'm evolving. That's all I know is I'm evolving. I'm getting better as a guy. All right, it's just story Yeah, all right, so she so she goes out and she sees a little kid in the front And she's very nice and then they follow this lady across the street

She goes in the woods and she ends up at a church. Okay, like a oldie would the whole thing Bobby, right? The whole beginning to end your I have to that's what there's the only way the only way to explain Okay, I'll do it as fast as again. Okay, basically in it what it is if I don't explain it You're just gonna be confusing. Yeah, she has a pie. Okay. Oh my god. Okay. She brings a pie She's a pie. She's a pie and it's all these white ladies at this church meeting and on the pie is a swastika. Oh On the face of the pie. Okay, right and then it turns out like they're all like white supremacists, right? And then all these ladies are and then they get kicked out of the church because the Anyway, then they end up at a store. Yeah, right and that one of the white supremacist lady owns a store

and they're all getting wine and cheese and stuff and to Colombians what I don't know where they are to native. We don't know if we don't know two brown girls cute girls sisters come in Yeah, they have an altercation with these ladies. The ladies decide we're gonna go to their house and fuck them up They go to their house. Yeah, right spoil the rest. I have to that's the only way to go because every character arc for every person What don't spoil the rest on spoiler? All right. That's it. That's what happens. It's very simple really fucked up But you know Bobby I and this is absolutely no disrespect to you at all. Yeah. Yeah Oh my god guys, I think it's time to start the podcast as you know, we love to do our theme song. Oh my god art Gentlemen whenever you're ready

I Oh Oh my God, that was so good. Hey man, thank you so much. Wait a second. How long did it take for you guys to learn the lyrics? Well, we took a class in fake Asian culture. Yeah, we figured it out.

You think a while or not? It did. It did take a little while. Oh, you guys absolutely nailed that. Oh my God. Thank you. It was the perfect thing for the perfect moment. And thank you so much.

Oh wait, that was so good. And by the way, guys, these guys are the Accidentals. Wow. Hashtag, the Accidentals. Accidentals. And you guys do tour? I don't know what to tour. I was like, how about you guys do shows?

Well, we go where the work is. Yeah, we go where the work is. That's right, well, we have one more thing for you. Oh, go ahead. One more thing. One more thing. Ready? Yeah.

One, two, three. Bobbily is the slept king. Kalyla is the slept king. Gilbert has the flattest face. And George is terrible at stand up. Kalyla, congratulations on 400 episodes. Thank you so much. You guys are also buying new merch at www.sleptkingdom.com.

The Accidentals, everybody. Incredible, you guys. Thank you. Thank you. I'm so glad. Thank you so much, guys. I think we're going to get a quick pick. Yeah, get a quick pick.

It's time to buy it. Thank you. Congratulations to you, my friend, for being great. I love you guys. Thanks, guys. Have a good one, guys. Oh, that was so sweet. I love you guys so sweet.

Wow. George is bad at stand up. That's so sweet. Why is that the laugh? Why is that the laugh? Hey, edit that whole part out. That was really amazing. Did you set that up?

No, they showed up here, man. Of course they did. You know what, Gilbert? I just have to say, man, you're the heart of the show. Oh, thank you. Don't you think? Sorry, George. Oh, George.

No, you're the brains. Brains and heart. We'll take it. You're the brains. Yeah. You're the heart. I'm the butthole, for sure. Well, who's the butthole?

I'm the butthole. You guys are both kind of buttholes. We're both buttholes. You're the mouth. You're the mouth. No, you're the mouth. You're the butthole. I'm the butthole.

You're the butthole. I'm the butthole. I take the shit. Yeah, yeah. What is he? Andres. He's inside the body somewhere. He's a body part.

You know what? You know, I would say you're maybe more like a spleen. Is that a spleen? It's useless. That's useless. A spleen? That's not. What is a spleen?

It's really a big organ and they do some stuff with farts. I'm just happy to be a part of the body. You're like a liver. A liver is essential. How many livers are there? One. The kidney has two. Two.

Your kidney. We can get rid of one and still live. No, you're everything, man. Thank you. Sorry for calling you a bean. That was rude. I'm so glad those guys came before what I was going to say because I would have fucked up the mood completely.

What were you going to say? I was talking to a friend of yours who will remain unnamed. Basically, we came across a TikTok of this girl who was like, you know, I've had three kids and all of my kids have Down syndrome. She was like, I don't understand. Her doctor was like, I think you should take a genetic test to see if you have Down syndrome. She was like, I clearly don't have Down syndrome. She got tested and she does.

How would she know? Her friend of yours was like, don't you think Bobby needs to get tested? I didn't say it. It was your friend. And I was like, well, and he was like, what is, is there a way for us to just swab his cheeks without knowing? I think he'll just do it. Let me ask you something.

I didn't say it. I know you didn't. This is interesting. Look at the way his hands are. Yeah. And this is my... Do you see what I'm doing with my hands? This is me being very spiritual in the moment and no feelings attached to it.

This is what I do. If I was like a preacher, this would be my main hand thing. That's your praying hands. Yeah. Yeah. I do like this. So I implore you. Who is this person that...

I'm not going to say. No, you will tell me. I implore with you. I ask you the truth. I'll tell you. We can edit it out. Just tell me. It'll...

Okay. I know. No way. And can I just say this? Since you told me, maybe... Because I know who you're saying. Maybe he should get tested. Maybe both of you guys...

I was looking at his hands and his head the other day. His head... Dude, his head is three times bigger than most people's heads. Right? And his hands are like a little bit thick and a little... Nothing wrong with it. Just shaping? Nothing wrong with it.

Nothing wrong with it. Right? So maybe he has the downs. I will take the test. It's not the appearance of it. It's about just, you know... Could I get 20%? Yeah.

So it's called mosaicism. Love it. Oh, I have that already. I have mosaicism. I have mosaicism. Yeah. Just some of your styles. I thought it was just really freaking cool.

And anyways, that's your friend. Wow. You have great friends. So somebody got tested for it and they have a little bit of it. Yeah, but she passed it down to all three of her children. Oh, but then they got full-blown? That? Yes.

Oh, wow. So that was really interesting. So she explains it really well on TikTok, like how that happens and everything. I know that there's something wrong with me. I just don't know what it is, you know? But there is something wrong. I don't know what. I don't know.

I've never seen a cougar in my life. I've never seen a cougar in my life. What was your train of thought when you said cougar just now? Some sort of animal. Like attacked you? Yeah. I had this recurring dream that when I was a kid, I was in the forest because there was like woods by my house, you know, because we're like, you know, frontiers people in

Poway. And there was woods next to the country club that, you know what I mean? It's still woods. It's still woods, right? And that this recurring dream that I was attacked by some sort of creature out there, like a coyote or something. Okay. How would you decipher that dream?

Why would you be attacked by that? I think maybe I was attacked by an animal. Oh. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, your dad. That's him. You're right. That's the coyote.

That's the coyote. Yeah, yeah. A full-blown mammal attacked you. It was your father. Yeah, he yelled at me. That's him, of the jacket I lost. Remember I told you that? Yeah.

Wait, repeat the story. I know. What? Say it again. I remember my dad going, let's go park. To the park? Yeah. Let's go to park.

Because I think my mom was telling him like, you have to do more. So we just sat on this park bench in a park. Why is that so funny? Bro, that was the most diabolical, evil life I've ever fucking seen in my fucking life. Bro, what the fuck was that? That was fucked up when you did Andre's, right? Sorry, I was projected. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah. So we're on a park bench and I remember he didn't bring a ball or anything. We just sat there. But I remember being, this is nice, you know, because he's never invited me to anything. And then we laughed and I forgot my jacket there and I remember him yelling at me for yelling, leaving the jacket, but that's my only real memory of my dad doing something kind. You know what I mean?

But followed up by something not so kind. What do you mean? Well, like you got introvert. But still, even that was a tension, I guess, you know, yeah, but I just, I don't know why I just got into that. But yeah, maybe that's the dream that I have of like, he's the animal in the forest. Maybe. Yeah.

And he's a cougar. So I wasn't wrong. Mountain lion. Yeah, mountain lion. We have him in California. Yeah, we do. Yeah. Do you know Andreas?

That was crazy. Okay. That was crazy. Wow. You want to hurt me, huh? No. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. It just didn't come out normally. Yeah. Yeah. You had something in your throat. Do you have resentments? Absolutely not. Yeah.

Who do you think has more resentments toward you? George or Audrey? When you look at both of them. I have a feeling that everyone has resentments. I think we should air them out loud because it's the fourth hundredth episode. Yeah. I mean, and I just want to say to people that's listening, we're not listening, right? That I will never quit this podcast.

This podcast will go on as long as I have breath in my body. It's my home. Just listen to that song that we came up with and all the experiences we've had on this podcast. Do you remember recording that song together? I remember that. That was amazing. Can you tell us the story for the audience listening?

Well, she always has to push me to do things. So I was like, I was. That's not true. You were already wrong. Oh. You were on GarageBand one day. That's what I'm saying. Okay.

And I was playing. I would play you songs on GarageBand, but I never thought about singing on top of them. I think you encouraged me to sing. And we were in bed. Yeah. And then you were like, oh, listen to this. And then you played around with gibberish. And then you go, you take the second half and I played around with gibberish.

We did it once. One time. And that was it. That was it. When you listen to the episode, do you hear her part two? Yeah. That's amazing. Yeah.

That's amazing. That was a one shot. One shot deal. We never try to fix it or anything. We were like, oh, this sounds insane. I like it. And there's another song that you hate. That's on it that we all recorded called Good Town.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. I didn't like that one. Yeah. So we all sang another song called Good Town. And Bryce. I still have it. Bryce is not on it.

Bryce is on it. Bryce is on it. Bryce is on it. I actually bet my life that he's not. No, your own single. I mean, he is. No, your own single. He wrote the lyrics, but you sang on it.

Oh, that's what it is. That's what it is. And we're equally tone deaf. Yeah. Equally tone deaf. Yeah. But Good Town you guys didn't like. Can we re-release it, Claude?

No, thank you. Why? Thank you. Just like melodically, I just don't even like it. Oh, yeah. It was also a weird time in your guys' relationship because it timed up with Red Dead Redemption and that's when you were playing like. Yeah.

That was 100% resentment. That was a resentment period. Yeah. Yeah. It was Red Dead resentment. Yeah. I have, I have, I mean, did I show you this photo? And this is, and when I, I want to show you this photo, I'll send it to you.

It, I realize I have a problem. Okay. Can I just show you? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And you're going to find this to be interesting. This photo.

Okay. Show me. Can I play it on? No, it's not. So it's, it's basically me. So we played Phoenix, bad friends and I, right, right, and Andrew and my mom came and my mom and I were sitting on a couch together and she was doing this and I was playing, um, my, um, wasn't that Game Boy?

What's it called? Um, my switch. Yeah. But, but her and I were just lost in our gadgets, right? And I realized that my mom, it's just, it's something that we do to not live in the moment and not be here. It's a coping mechanism. Dissociating.

Yeah. Because of just generational trauma and stuff, right? It's just like we just, and Andrew, every, people are ripping us apart on the couch. Like, oh, look at these two. You know what I mean? But it's like, it's just something that we do. It's sad. Must be nice to not have to cope.

You guys are coping in that moment. I get it. And I totally got it. I'm, my mom, when she comes over, does she say anything to me? She doesn't. She cleans around me. Yeah. And I'm like, Ma, do you want to watch a movie?

No. And then she just leaves, right? Yeah. And I force her to interact with me. And I know that she's just coping. So I get it. I totally do. Yeah.

But that was the first time I realized that my mom does it and that we were just kind of like similar in that way. But I don't think that it's a healthy thing. Because you know, everyone, also, when you see the photo, right, there's 40 people in the room having a party. And we're just, well, I, you know, there was something, I was almost there to get the golden clock. I have an excuse, but you know what I mean?

You know about the cam, you know about the golden clock? What game? It's OK. Terrible, terrible question. It's OK, Cam. How do you know Ken? Ken? He's our editor.

He's been for years. He's one of our... How do you not know him? We've met before. We've met at the live show. Live show. How many times? Twice.

And we have conversation? Not really. Well, then there you go. Yeah. You know, like, you know, you have a cool face. Yeah, but Ken, like, here's the thing about Ken. He's had to sign, like, multiple NDAs because he knows everything that's on the editing room floor.

So he knows all of your crazy things. Have I said fucked up things? Get on the mic, get on the mic, Ken. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, so guys, this is Ken. If you guys also know Ken... Of course he's going to say no. Yeah, he signed an NDA.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Also, guys, Ken is a winner. And now it looks to him. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Also, Ken is a... He's been on TV. He's the winner of America's Best Dance Crew. Yeah, he's an incredible dancer.

You mean it from Jabba Walkies? Yeah. Kind of. Yeah. They're on a different season. Wait, are you the one that did the dance and he did the dance, too? Yes. Oh, I know.

You have a big fan of your work, dude. Have a big fan of your work. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I like your shit. Yeah, yeah. What do you think about Bobby's dance moves? It's great. Really?

Very entertaining. Thank you so much. You think he's like... I would say, like, he's kind of an original, right? I would say so. Yeah, I don't know why people don't do that when they're on the dance floor. Do something original. They do.

Yeah. Who? They do. Shut up. A lot of dancers are... Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just don't like the way you're hunched over. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's uncomfortable. It was. Yeah, yeah. Can you go closer to the mic? Yeah. He's a dancer. He seems very tight. I know.

What the hell, dude? Yeah, he seems very, like, you know what I mean, tense. It's because of the type of dancing I do. Oh, you do robotic. Yeah. I have to dance. Yeah. Show me something.

And I'll see if Ken can... Copy it. Copy it. Stand up. All right. Jellyfish. Jellyfish. Jellyfish.

Jellyfish. No, I'm going to make up... I don't know what a jellyfish is. Oh, okay. You don't know what a jellyfish is? What? Oh, wait, you do? I'm going to just come up with my own move, see if you can do it, right?

Just check it out. Dude, he's kind of getting it. What the heck? Oh, you're pure talent, huh? Yeah. You're a mimic. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So have I said things that you've had to edit out when...

Oh, my God, that was troublesome. To me? Troublesome to me? Yeah. No, no, no, to you. No, I don't care. He really doesn't. That's the beautiful thing.

There's two types of people. People that care and don't care. Imagine if we had an editor who was easily offended, though. Yeah. That would be insane. That would be insane. Can is a very specific choice for us because he just is okay with... Well, he's a jungle Asian, no?

He gets it. He gets it. You guys are the best. I love it. How do you feel about Bobby having to apologize to the entire Vietnamese community after? Apologizing for what? Tell them what you did. Yeah.

About years ago, this is probably 15, maybe even longer. I said chunkalations. And I said Vietnamese people are jungle Asians. I didn't really mean anything. I wasn't even trying to get a laugh. It was just... That's what I said. And then...

I can see other Asian comics now using the term, just free nilly, as if they came up with it. But anyway, my point is this is that... Then my manager calls me. She goes, yeah, people at Disney. Some Asian kids at Disney that work there that are just infuriated that you said that. So then I had to go to a Vietnamese news place and go, you know what I meant by this is that... I mean, I know it's insulting, but we're all the same. I was just trying to like...

Apology to her. I had to do an apology to her. That was back in the day. I've got to apologize for a lot of things, but it's like, yeah, but I've said crazy things. But you're not offended by that. No, I'm not. I can see how other people can go in it because what if, you know, not all jungle Asians, if they are jungle Asians, live in the jungle.

They live in the houses. That's right, Bobby. Apartment, apartment, apartment. Would you call Eskimo snow Asians? I'm sure there are some Eskimos that live in the desert. Inuit. Yeah. I think it's just...

Nope, they don't. I don't think Inuits live in the desert. I know, but I mean, I know, but if Eskimo moved to like Joshua Tree... Is it like a Hawaiian that moves to Vegas? Yeah. Like, you know, Hawaiian. Yeah. Well, that's Cannes Point exactly.

It's like not everyone geographically like Southeast Asian is going to live in a jungle. Could I just say this though? Please defend. But here's my defense. All right. Everything I've known about Vietnamese people was through movies. And that fan. And that fan.

Yeah, beef. No, I love that fan. I have no idea what you're talking about. You're right, you're right. I fucking love that guy. That was movies. Yeah. You all right?

I get Apocalypse now. All of the two. All of which were filmed in the Philippines, by the way. Yeah. Get your jungle side. I am a jungle Asian. Yeah, yeah. And there's a lot of jungle there.

Yeah. I mean, there's more jungle than non-jungle. That's... You have a point. No, no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no. No, no, no, no. Because a lot of like the northern part is very mountainous kind of like, I would say

the south. You talking about the Vietnamese or? No, the Philippines. Okay. That's true. You haven't been everywhere? That's true. Okay.

But anyway, but I didn't mean anything bad about it. Right. Or, you know, there wasn't any ill will toward it, but I had to do the Apology tour. But there are people like you that you're not offended. Yes. Are you offended by like racial slurs? No, not really. Really?

I love this one. It's because like, I always think about if someone is trying to offend me, I always think, what's going on with them that they have... So much going on with me, man. There's so many issues. You're right. It's on me, dude. Fuck.

Because usually it's just projecting and I don't feel like they're trying, I don't, I don't feel like they're trying to hurt me. If I was a superhero, that'd be my name, Projector. Projector. Oh. Constantly projecting my shit toward them. You know what I mean? Yeah, you're right.

So I'm projecting, right? But in retrospect, maybe I should have done the Apology tour, but I always ended up like... I mean, this was a time when there was no social media. It's not like you could just turn the camera on yourself and say, hey, I'm sorry. This was a time where you probably had, your manager probably had to call like a Vietnamese publication. And find like the local Vietnamese like community, like... No, I think Mad TV had to do it.

Okay, that's what I'm saying. I was on Mad TV. For some reason that makes it funnier for me. Yeah, Mad TV. Yeah, I think the TV show had had resources like, you know, you have to, you know. But I also remember the very first time I was on that, it was 2000, I got on the show. And there were, I remember being, stay here, I want to talk to you, but I like you a lot. I like you too.

Thank you. You guys are robots. So in fact, I want to see you more often. Okay. One more, one more, because I had to do things in threes. I have OCD, but I remember like there was this thing called Planet Mad TV and it was a forum, right? And I remember...

It was their Reddit back in the day. Back in the day. Yeah. And I wasn't used to like, I've never read things about myself ever in real time. Because back then, it's like, if there was no such thing as the internet, I would think that I was the king of the world. You're just showing up to work, you know what I mean? And you're still on the show and you're killing it.

But when I read, there was literally pages about how terrible I am on that thing. And I just remember being like, I didn't know anything about, now I don't even read it. And there are millions of forums that like hate me, but it's like, I would never read it. And I remember being just so sad and depressed and worthless. But now, you get strengthened by it. I don't know why I got into that, but... I don't know, but I don't think...

Why am I sitting here? I don't think any of that stuff should matter anyway, because it's not true about you. I don't think so. Man, I can't... And you've heard the worst of the worst things he said, so that's a really... Yeah, yeah. And Kent, if you had a vagina... Oh my God.

Jesus. I can't say that. You'll say it. Anyway, that's it. If you had a vagina, that'd be cool. But Dick's good, too. Yeah, for sure. You know what I mean?

He'll take it. Yeah, I feel like I was going into a great area. I don't prefer... I like both sexes. Okay, go back. Wow. Are you coming out? You said you like both sexes.

Are you coming out? Honestly, Bobby, be real with yourself. Dig deep. I want you to look me in the eyes. Are you like bi? Bye. Wow, that's all I needed. Am I bi?

No. At all. You've never wanted... Well, I mean, I know that what I masturbate to is, you know what I mean? It's like only one time in my life, there's one video on Pornhub that has one video with a man who's a woman that has a penis, it's the only time I've ever kind of stroked my penis to something. That's hot, though.

Honestly, like... She's beautiful, though. They're all hot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're so hot to me. But I have, like, male friends who, like, love trans girls and, like, I get it. Like, I find them attractive. Yeah.

And there's nothing wrong with... If Andrea said, I've divorced my wife, right, and said, you know what I mean? I'm dating, you know, trans. I wouldn't... There would be no... There would be no judgment. You know what I mean? I'd be like, good for you, bro.

You know what I mean? Yeah. Grace as a woman? Oh, man. But I don't think I... You know, I think I know my character defects and I know, because I think about myself all the time. That's going to get clipped out.

No, not in terms of, like, you know, how great I am. I think about myself in terms of, I know this sounded weird. I know that. Yeah, that sounded weird. I think about myself in terms of, like, what I have and haven't done and my behaviors and, you know, and going, why do I do this? There's something... You know what I mean?

Even showing you that photo of being looking at things about, you know, my behaviors that seem to be either not healthy and not and trying to fix things. So I'm always... And that thing, in terms of sexuality, do I have a problem kissing a man on the lips? No. Mm-hmm. Would I tongue a guy on the stage to get a laugh, 100%? Would I dock my penis into another man's penis?

100%. 100%. Yeah. But only for entertainment purposes. What if it's not comedy? No. I will not. What's the point?

I don't know. I would do it... Oh, okay, you're right. All right. Let's break it down. I'll break it down. Break it down. I would do it to see if it worked.

The docking? Yeah. I knew it, because you're very curious. That's why I would... I'm science-minded in many ways. I have a question about docking. I have a question about docking. Do you need to have foreskin, or would just one person with foreskin?

I would think that if you and I could... You have foreskin, right? Yeah. I can almost dock with... I'm a universal USB. I can dock with... You're like Type O blood, basically. Type O.

You're a universal donor. Exactly. But there are guys... I'm sure you've met guys that have like regular... Not... Mine's regular, but... They are... It's irregular.

No, that's not true. It's irregular. I thought about this, and I don't think that I would circumcise my sons. Okay. Thank you. To each his own. Yeah, but I'm cutting... Because when you think about it...

I'll cut it if they don't do it. It's like kind of like this weird, like I've been in a country where it's like this legit mutilation. They have kids line up when they're seven years old, and they just get Kamungae, and then it's like this plant, like herbal thing, and then they chop these fucking pork... But if you don't chop it, how are Koreans going to make the skin cream? How Sandra Pollock did that? Yeah, how is Sandra Pollock going to look as young as she does?

Okay. We have to chop. We have to chop for Sandra. You have to chop, Dick? Yeah, for Sandra. Yeah, me, but... But like, no, normal... There's other penises that have skin...

Like you guys can... Okay, am I crazy here? Can you put your skin over your penis tip? Yes. Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, everyone can do it. I have saggy skin, though. You don't?

No, I do. It's just regular? No. It's sagging. I think what... Honestly, I think... My sister looks so concerned. I did it to myself because I jerk off so much that I think I just...

The stick... The stem is loose. No? No. Regular. Okay, thank you. That's all I wanted to hear. Yeah, go ahead.

No, no, I have technical information that probably you won't be happy with. It's... I think... No, I think when... I've never heard anyone sound so white than that. I have technical... Off a penis conversation? Yeah, it's really white.

And you gotta hold back a little bit because you're freaking me out right now, dude. So just start over with the technical line. Go ahead. Okay, I have a son and he is a baby, so he's very fat. It smells so racist. What is happening? Just go back to technical. Go back to technical.

Go back to technical because whatever you're doing now is even worse. He's fat, so it's kind of like babies have a fupa, so it pushes their skin over. So even if they're circumcised, it seems like they have a foreskin. Yeah, look at that. So I think it's just because you got a little bit of chubbiness. Anyway. Pushes your... Yeah, anyway.

Makes you have a baby penis. I think that... He's saying you have a baby penis. Because your fupa... Because your fupa... That's insane. I get it. Dementional, but like...

Not dimensional. As far as like how the... He's basically like you have a fupa and that's the reason why... Maybe it's a foreskin even though your son's fat. You have a baby penis is what he's saying. Can you believe he just said that? I can't believe you just said that. That's what's technical.

He finds that to be technical. Technically you're fat, so you have foreskin. This is a medical opinion. And this is a true thing I'm going to say. On the boss, when me and Andrew are on tour, it was three in the morning and I got erect. Okay. Just by being there. Hanging with him?

Just be with Andrews? No, sometimes my penis will just go, we're up! Yeah. Morning wood. Yeah, morning... But it was like three in the morning wood. I'm trying to help you out. Okay.

Thank you. And I just pulled it out and I showed Andrew. And he went... I gasped. What did he say about it? He went, whoa! Like he did a Keanu Reeves. Like Keanu Reeves.

Yeah, yeah. He's like, whoa! Right? It doesn't look that... It's like a very regular penis. Thank you so much. Anyway, let's go back to docking. Yeah.

Because I'm not... I am circumcised and you're not... I think it'd be easier for... I think one needs to be circumcised so you can have the skin that'll wrap the other penis, right? Yeah. But if both... There's two wraps, right?

That would be fun. Yeah, yeah. Fun. No, that'd be difficult. Difficult, yeah. Yeah. Maybe get it a little sweaty so it really sticks. Let's go back to being bi.

Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Can we go back to being bi? Let's do that. Yeah. But no, I don't think I am. Oh, so I learned this thing recently that, you know, the Philippines doesn't have... has

never had like any serial killers. That's so hard to believe. That is hard to believe. I mean, there's obviously like very like fucked up mass killing of certain... You should be able to... By the government. By the government. Well, you should be a video once.

Oh, God. All right. What did I show you? This is insane. There was a family, all right, who one of the families was a cop and the other family and the guy just went to the neighbor's house and shot the grandmother. Yeah. That's a murderer.

That's not a serial killer. Someone who goes around for months at a time and, you know, someone who's trying to like leave track. It's so humid. But you know why? How do you... No, but there's a very specific reason why. Humidity?

Well, because we have... I just, it's hard as a hysterical when it's that hot. No, we have like the Chismosa culture. So apparently our gossip culture and the speed at which gossip goes around between like Titas and families prevents like, like if there's someone that's a murderer, you'll know about it like the next day. Wow. Because people talk a lot there.

They say gossip is not good, but... Is it? Look. Oh, see? Chismosa culture. Wow. So gossip is good. I was saying, you know how your mouth is, you just run your mouth?

Yeah. It's not a bad thing. You could be saving lives. Yeah, but I lie a lot. Oh, yeah, that's true. That's a problem. You know what I mean? I lie a lot.

Countries with the most serial killers, obviously. United States. Wait, who's the number ones in the United States, obviously. Number two is what? England. England. Makes sense. Yeah.

Look at the number between us and everyone else. It's like staggering. It's so staggering. And it's not because we're the biggest ones. Spain, 17, Andres. Let's go to the end. Who's like the... Netherlands.

They're like 12 in their history. That's crazy. That's crazy. I do wonder though how accurate this is because what about like, you know, like the police and like, you know, what do we, like, what would we do in the Philippines? How do we keep track of serial killers? They don't have a sense of consensus. But I do believe there's something about how gossipy like the Titas are back home where

I don't think anyone can get past like maybe one or two killings. Do you know what I mean? Out of all the people we've had on the podcast, who do you think would be the one that we were gossiping about that it could be a serial killer? Oh, shit. Run some names. Let's go through some time. Okay.

We'll start with an easy one for half a minute. Let me just name some names. I'll say some. We'll start with Rick Glassman. Just put it out there. No way. No way. Yes.

Yes. Yes. Absolutely not. What's your case for yes? I don't know. I don't have a case. I just, because he was telling me... I'm going to kill people.

No, no, no. He wasn't that. He called me up one day. Hey, do you have 800 grand? And I go... I go, why? There's a card I want to get. Magic.

A magic card. Oh my God. Okay. In the East Coast. And in my head, I'm like, this guy could kill somebody. That's all? Because he's... Yeah, yeah, yeah.

He's like a good investor? No. $800,000 to buy a magic card? Yeah. Is insane behavior. First of all, the phone call. Just to call me out of... Not hello.

Someone else. Let's do another. Okay, yeah, yeah. Let's do... Let's go through. Let's do the first name. Okay, here. I don't think... I think he has too much integrity, but a great serial killer look is Samarill.

Oh, the vibe, yeah. He's got... Yeah. Cool. To me, he's more Oklahoma City bombing. Like really intellectual. Yeah. He's more like one shot, you know what I mean? 300 kill.

Seriously. Kind of a guy. When you look at like, come on. Yeah, for sure. Like for sure. Great face. Yeah, yeah. Great face for it.

Eyebrows. Great face for it. Yeah. All right. So Samarill, maybe... Let's just start with just random names. Okay? Eddie Wong.

Eddie Wong. I can see a Virginia Tech. Because he's Asian? Because he's... That's a racist way. I can see a Virginia Tech on that. I don't see it. I rate him like maybe a serial killer potential like a 1.5.

Whoa. Very low. Judd Apatow. Oh, a zero. He's a wholesome daddy. Yeah, wholesome daddy. Very good. That's what I wanted.

Yeah. Thanks, Judd. David Spade. David Spade. What do you think? Spade could be a 10 or a 1. Yeah, exactly. It's one or the other.

He could get away with it because he has like the nice face looking. He gets away with a lot. Yeah, it's just like when my best friend, when we were younger, she was like really like innocent looking Asian girl. So we would send her to steal all of the stuff from Sephora that we wanted. Because no one ever suspected her. She was just so like cute and like innocent looking. No, okay. Okay.

So he's kind of that, right? I'm going to throw out a name. Okay. Little controversial. He's been on our podcast. Shab. No, zero. No, doesn't happen.

Zero. Zero, too. Yeah, because he's, he's a, I. You'd see him coming. Yeah, I think. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think he would leave a lot of track. And he also doesn't know how red it works.

I'm being serious. You have to know how to do computer stuff. Keep that in. You're right. You're right. Is that crazy what I just said? No, no, no. You're right.

He doesn't know how red it works. Yeah. Yeah. Is this our last episode? We're bringing it back. Okay. Okay. Okay.

Let's move on. Let's move on real quick. Let's move on really quick. I'd like to present you guys with a gift actually. Okay. I don't know if you guys are familiar with this. There's a very popular Instagram. What do you call it?

Like yeah. Instagram page called celebs on sandwiches. So during the pandemic, this guy blew up because you can't commission from him, but he will just choose celebrities to put them on sandwiches. And then a lot of celebrities started getting these during the pandemic and posting. Okay. I got in contact with this guy named Jeff through a good friend named Judy. And he commissioned himself, you guys on sandwiches.

Oh my God. Look, it's your favorite meatball sandwich. Oh my God. Can I explain yours? Okay. Mine is, I said, it's a breakfast sandwich. No, it's not. It's a longganisa.

But it's a longga burger. So this burger is made from longganisa and there's an egg and it's on a brioche. And just so you guys can see, these are all the ones that have been picked. Who's that? Barack Obama. Oh shit. Ryan Reynolds. Right.

Robert Downey Jr. Oh my God. Oh my God. We got to frame these now. Don't even touch it. I got to frame these immediately. These are so good. Oh my God.

What's his name? Celebon sandwiches. His name is Jeff. Jeff's Celebon Sandwiches. That's fucking amazing. Thank you so much. That's amazing. Shout out to Judy who connected us.

So can you tell us a little bit about the meatball sub? Why is that a sandwich that's so dear to your heart? What do you mean? The meatball sub. Why? Why do you always order meatball? I've noticed that you order it from almost every restaurant you go to. It's, I mean, I have to say, I don't know.

I'm going to just, let's break it down. Okay. I don't like meatballs on its own. Correct. Because he doesn't like ground meat. Like when I make like a... Burger. Like, no.

Yeah. And anytime I've made like yin and ling or anything like that, he's just like, I don't like ground meat. Dingling? Yin and ling. Dude, whatever she makes, dingling. You don't like it. You're not gay.

You're not gay. I hate dingling. I don't know. I don't know. And then, but I like reds, the pasta sauce. You do. Right? I like cheese.

Yeah. And I like the type of bread, which is like a French roll. Yeah. Italian French roll. Yeah. Like a baguette, you know what I mean? Baguette. Baguette, baguette.

But I, so, but I don't know. It's one of those things where it's like the combination of all of it. Yeah. I love on its own, not so much. So I don't know, but I just love the flavor of it. You like every other day. In fact, I want to get one today. Well, you had one just two days ago.

I know. I love them. Yeah. And I think, can I be honest with you? I'm going to say this. Potbelly has one of the... I know why. Why?

Because when I was in Chicago once, I was with Ike Baronholz. And he was like, we were like, we needed a meal really quickly. And he goes, let's go to potbelly. I never heard of it back then. This is 20 years ago. And I go, I don't want to go to a fast food. He goes, you'll like it. So I was just out of protest.

I go, I'm going to get the thing that I don't think I'm going to like, which is the meatball sandwich. It was the best. I can still remember the sandwich today. Same with omelettes in France. I had an omelette in France. I hated omelettes before that. But when you have a good one, it gets you hooked.

So that was my beginning with meatball sandwiches. Wow. It's a great history. Mine is a little different. Mine is a longanisa burger. I don't know, you know, longanisa is, it's a Filipino like sausage. You got the egg on top. It's a very comforting food for me.

I ate it a lot when I was a dumb drunk in my 20s. It was like the food that would like soak up the alcohol for me. But yeah, that's my story. Is there duck in it? What's your beef with duck? Why do you hate duck so much? You don't eat duck, man. You ate duck in the Philippines when we were there.

You had a duck egg actually, a baby duck. Yeah, I know. And repeat it. You had balot and you had a real duck at Mott 32. That's true. You ate duck five ways. I didn't order it. Did I?

It came out. Of where? The kitchen. Of the kitchen. I didn't order it. I know. But you chose the restaurant specifically known for their duck. I hear his, he's trying to argue that.

This is my argument. He didn't order it, but he had to eat it because it was there. Because it's a fancy restaurant. They have it. And then I go out. It's if I was at that restaurant and they go, here's a meerkat. And a meerkat's like this. I would eat like a slice of the cheek or whatever.

Just to try it. And I'd be like, I don't like it's too dry. Yeah, yeah. But what happens when you, I saw you eat multiple pieces of duck. And I think he has like a philosophical problem with ducks. Because I think you think they're rapists. No. What?

Yeah, ducks are rapists. I'd love to hear this theory. No, no, I don't know much about that. You know, and so let's not cancel the duck right now. All right. So, you know what I mean? A duck word, sorry. Is it because of Donald Duck?

It's because of, they're so associated with cartoon characters. Like Daffy. Like Daffy and Donald, right? That I just, and also they're cute. I think cuteness has, I think the reason why the panda has never been eaten is because of just aesthetically, they're cute, but they could be delicious. That's all that fat. You know what I mean?

They could be the most delicious thing in the world, but you would never eat one because they're just too damn cute. Yeah, but people club seal, seals are cute. Who club seals? People, seal and like whale and all this stuff is like, you know, it's a certain culture's eat it, right? If I was the president of the world, okay. They have those.

If they had one, right? And anybody clubbed a seal, they would be death row. Yeah, but that's dumb. Why? Because sometimes that's the only protein source for a lot of people. Okay. If you're a Viking, then you can do it. Like if you're in a Nordic place, you know how they do it in the Nordic places?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. How they like hang whales and they eat the blubber or whatever. Yeah. She just paid that picture. I don't know much about it, but you know, I think I saw it in the Northman or something. Northman, great movie, but I don't think they did it in the movie. Let's move on. But thank you so much for painting those amazing.

Thank you. Oh, so don't get, let's, let's not fuck these up. Yeah. And he's going to print bigger ones for you guys to play on the wall as well. So he likes us. He doesn't do other podcasts. No, I think you guys might be the first podcast. Oh, that's so nice.

Would you guys like to, I just want to also add, you know, when I was on the road with Andrew, so many Tiger Billy fans with their sweatshirts and our merch and stuff, it's been great. It's been so cool to see, you know. Thank you so much for your support. Anyway, let's move on to the next segment. Would you guys like to listen to some voicemail, some fans? Yeah, let's do a couple here. We'll listen to this.

Sorry, just voicemails. Gabby, what are you doing? Okay. You always attack Gabby. There's something about her. What do you think it is? Wait, hold on. Because I think I like her so much that I.

Hey, my name is Joe. And I saw the, the thing to leave a favorite moment thing for the thing. And there's like all these moments where Kalilah is like, keep me aware of, I don't know, like Bobby's needs and like who he really is. And then there's these moments where Bobby, like the veil is lifted and you see like what a kind person he is. So those are my favorite moments. They're very tender and genuine. And I think they make the laughs that much better.

So thank you guys for the great podcast. So sweet. Yo, what up Tiger Billy Sam. Peter Long Beach. Long Beach. I just say, man, I love the show. Love all you guys, Bobby, your funniest hell, Kalilah, your baddest hell, Gil, George, everybody, man. I appreciate what you guys do every week, man. I love tuning in.

I love listening to this shit, man. It makes my day a lot better. I'll tell you that for sure. Just keep it up, man. Just keep the guest coming in. You know, you got a lot of fam out here. You got a lot of people supporting you guys. This guy's a big dick, I can tell.

What a good dude. Yeah, one more. Yeah. This is my favorite podcast moment is probably when Bobby had that shit underwear that he used as a threat. That was a good one. What do you mean? And then what the podcast means to me. I feel like I can relate to Bobby. We got similar names.

His name is Bobby Lee. Mine's Eddie ski. He's five three. I'm five three. What the fuck? The coincidence and I used to look to when I worked construction, long hours, real draining. But listening to Tiger Valley made it a bit easier to thank y'all. So nice.

Remember when you the poo panty, you try to wipe it on Gilbert? Yeah, early on. I don't remember. So I put in my panty and it got hardened. It wasn't soft. You had put on stage, I think. Oh, that's right. You put on stage and you like thought you just you just farted and then you took it off.

And Clallow's like, Hey, there's actually a poo stain there. And then it was just hanging up in the podcast room. And I forget what Gilbert did to deserve it, but I'm sure they deserved it. It's funny that you say this because when I was in Atlanta or one of those cities, I farted on stage. I took a mic and I would go. I got a fart and I was sticking to my butthole and it made a ripple and it got a huge laugh. But after the show, there was this white lady and she gave me a grimace.

And I go, What's the grimace for your face? You think that's funny farting in a mic? It's disgusting. Right. And that's basically speaking. It's disgusting, sir. Oh, my God. Oh, my God, George.

You swung and you missed. You're forgiven. It is very disgusting what you did on stage. Doubling down with an accent. Was that Asia? I think so. It was India. Yeah.

Let me say something, pal. Look at everyone else in the room. Look at everyone else in the room. Let me say something, pal. Right. I respect it. What? Whatever you're doing right now, I respect it.

And I don't know what kind of game you're playing, but I'm on board. And I think what you're saying is, is that I want a war and I want to be in a war and I want to win a war. Okay. Who are you starting a war with? With this guy and his clan. All right. All right.

So if that's what you want, we'll have it, but I respect your game. Congratulations. You're a man. I'm so confused. Me too, but I think it makes sense. It makes sense. I love you, bud. That was bold.

Would you guys like to answer some, these are like questions some fans have asked, people have asked on the internet. You guys can either choose to answer them or you can not answer them and take a thwack from someone. That's thwack, okay. It's truth or thwack. Go ahead. Here we go.

First one. Started easy. First episode you recorded that didn't air and why? Oh yeah. Want to think about it? In the early days, yeah. No, I think just one. In the beginning?

I think, but we released it as a Patreon. We did? Yeah. The one with Patty. Oh, wow. Yeah, which was, oh yeah, Patty was Jessica's cousin. Cousin. Yeah.

So funny. She's so funny, but not on screen though. No, I think she was, we found her to be really funny in real life. So we really like put her on the show. Yeah. She was like a language barrier. Yeah. I find that people, they, like we do that on the live shows, you know what I mean,

where we bring people on stage. The people just get like. It's scary. It's scary. The lights are bright as shit. Like when my mom came up, so my mom was all, we picked her up from Phoenix and we go, you're going to go on stage and she got, no problem. I love people.

I go up, right? And it was 4,000 people. As she walks out, I can see her change. Like, I got to get the fuck out of here. Yeah. It freaked her out because the whole theater stood for her. Yeah. Imagine this old Korean woman and she just, her face turned all white and she felt the

fear. Happy word. You know, she passes out. No, no, no. She said hi and she ran off stage and we never saw her again until the end of the show. Yeah. But it was great for her to witness that. You know what I mean?

Yeah. And I don't think we've ever not aired episodes. No. We've definitely not aired parts of episodes. Yeah. Chunks, but. Or sometimes, like I think there was a couple times, maybe one or two times when we started recording and then the vibe was just really off either because we had just gone into a

fight or we. Yeah. Those are painful for me. The one, you know, the one back in the condo where we broke up afterwards. Oh, wow. Remember that one? That was a tough one. Yeah.

It's where I stayed after. Yeah. I was like, George, don't be here. Just let me go home. Is it because you had relapse? Yeah. Yeah. It was a tough one.

Yeah. That was tough. Yeah. Because you had, I was shocked because you had like successfully kept your relapse a secret for what? Three months. Yeah. But I knew something was off.

So I kept telling his therapist. Like I kept saying like he's either manic or in a verge of a nervous breakdown and then I would, but that was so scary. That was so scary to hide it. Hiding it is hard. Yeah. I mean, but then once I, you know, I told you, I left it open for a bit and then I got sober.

I was scared. That was scary. But we've had mostly good ones. Yeah. Yeah. We walked away one. This is great. Yeah.

Next question. Next question. Truth or Thwack, would you ever have Andy Dick back on? Yes. Yeah. Okay. And then follow up to that. I think, I think, um, he's concerning for me because I care so much about him that,

um, and I know that he's, I don't know exactly what's going on in his life, but based on his posts and stuff, I don't know if he's on, I don't know. I don't want to make judgments. I'll say this, like, I don't think that you should shove a camera, you know, in front of someone who might be like struggling at the moment. So like, I think we would have him back. Like he would have to have some time or something under his belt because it's fucked up. That's so exploitative to have someone like clearly like in crisis and then being like,

yeah, do what we're doing. But also we're making assumptions that he was in crisis. Maybe that's who he is normally. Uh, well. He was in crisis. He was in crisis. Link down below. Watch the video.

Yeah. Yeah. Follow up to that. Is there a guess you would absolutely not have back on? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Please say the name. Nope.

Nope. Can't do it. Oh my God. It's so rude. It was like, this is the hardest thing I've ever done. And I've had one guess. I don't even want to say the name, but I couldn't even understand a word they're saying. Okay.

Could you please slack each other? Well, let's guess and we'll cut it out. I didn't understand a word they were saying. How about this? How about this? We'll leave it up. And the count of three say the name. Both of you at the same time.

First name. If we guys are thinking of, right? Do you guys have a name? All right. You two, right? You have a name? Uh, no. I understand people.

I don't. So I'm going to say the name. I'm going to cover my mouth so we can keep it in and we'll just bleep out the word. Yeah. Ready? I'm the only one that's doing it. Yeah. I want to see if you can guess it with him.

Want to try it? I want to guess maybe two people. Just guess it. Here you go. Ready? One, two, three. Wow. I don't know why you covered your mouth exposed that he covered it.

Let's do it again. Let's do it again. Let's do it again. Let's do it again. Let's do it again. One, two, three. Yeah. What?

Not who most people think. What? Not who most people think. Yeah. No, that's exactly who I thought he was going to say. No way. Yeah. He had a really hard time with that.

I know. I'm just saying like the audience is going to guess wrong. You're going to guess wrong. Yeah. Because when I was watching this person, I was just like, I don't know exactly what he just said at all in any way, shape, or form to even react to what he's saying. You know what I mean? And he's so funny and that, but that's how he talks.

Yeah. You know what I mean? So that was a very difficult one. I'd have him back if he wanted to, you know, do it. I'd love to have him back. Yeah. And then I think that's it. Oh, really?

Okay. No, no, no. I know another one. Hold on. Hold on. That wasn't a great one. I thought it was going to be great. Ready?

Yeah. Wow. There's a gasp in the room. Surprising. I thought he was okay. It was fine. He wasn't what I thought it was going to be. Where were you expecting?

You know, he's been very good about the Mexican guy. Andres, he's been Colombian, whatever he is, he's been very good about, you know what I mean? Not editing. You're very mindful about things that would resonate as negative or whatever or not good. Look at George rolling his eyes. Oh, you think you're better at it? Completed another producer next to him.

Right. Well, because it was your little fucking shot earlier. See what happened? See what happens, my friend? He's great if he's told what to do. Oh, wow. Intense. Yeah.

Here's another one. Truth or thwack? Okay. Who was the comedian or celebrity that hit on Kalyla on Raya? That's just not one. Several. Ooh, a little flax thing. I'll name it with my mouth covered.

Wait, don't we have to thwack if it's bleeped? But he found a way around it by covering his mouth, apparently. We've heard it in the room. The thwack is if it stays in the episode, if you don't say it in the episode, it's a thwack. Take the thwack. Don't make, don't start wars. Thwack on Kalyla. No thwacks.

Is that what a thwack is? You're the one who made up the word. This is truth or thwack. You know what truth or thwack is? Oh, truth or thwack. Yeah, that's not thwack. You're right. We were grateful that everyone's done it.

Here. Confused the game. Oh, what? Oh, God. Jesus, that was loud. How did you do that? You always broke my bone. Did you hear that?

That was so loud. Holy shit. You just shattered a bone in my fucking finger. That hurt so fucking. That was amazing. You know how they have that slapping thing? You should do a thwacking. I would have been knocked out for sure if that was on my face.

That's insane. Powers. I want to thwack you. No, that fucking hurts so bad. Give her a good one. No, I don't want to thwack you. I'm not gonna thwack you. I love you.

No, I love you too much. Thwack me. All right. You want to thwack her? She won't answer this question. Can we get more details on Kalyla's DJ career? Yeah, thwack me. Oh, dude.

She does it. Very good. All right. Here's a big one. We know about this, but people have asked many times, we've never said on the podcast, why hasn't Bobby gone on Joe Rogan's podcast? What's the inside scoop? Do you want to be honest about it?

If I'm honest about it, we have to cut it out. So I don't want to be honest about it. Thwack time. Thwack time. Oh. Fist bump. Fist bump. I mean, I love the answer.

You got to keep it in then if you answer it. It's for the audience, not for us. Is there a diplomatic version you want? I missed. Don't take the thwack and then say it. I'm going to say it. I don't think it's that bad. I think I'm saving it.

Interesting. For something big. So I think that's what it is. I think if I do a special or something like that or a gigantic movie or something that I need to really promote, I think that's when I would do it. I feel like he's going to have me on once and it'll be a long time since he has me. But yeah, I think that's what it is. But you were on it in the early days.

Early days. Yeah, I did like 10 of them in the early days. Because I would just, there was an open door policy where you could just stop by and say hi. And he would always be happy to see me and stuff. But I think since it's new, it's the way he's doing it now, I want to wait. Because I think it'll be a big deal if I do do it. Yeah. So I'm just holding off on it.

Alright, this is the final one. This is a simple one. I mean, the truth is because of... Why are you covering your mouth? You know what I mean? That's the truth. I think I remind him of... You know, that's what other people have said that to me.

Do you don't think anyone can hear you right now? You're going to cut that out, right? No. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We'll keep that in. No, cut that out. We'll bleep it. We'll bleep it.

Alright, bleep it. Final one. What moment on the pod has made you guys laugh the hardest? Any individual moments where it was? Oh my God, there's so many. Chaotic. What was the most chaotic laugh you've ever had on the pod? Genuine laughs.

It's always like so low once for me and it's always something so stupid. When you and I fight over something ridiculous. I don't remember. I forgot what it was. Stupid stuff. For the last year, something. You and I... Yeah, when we got up.

It got up and yeah, yeah. The Diet Coke thing was funny. That one because he had his... When Bob has his own version of events in his head and I have my own version of events and we stand very firm and so we start to get really... Nothing makes me laugh harder because we really want to physically fight, I think. Yeah, but then we get to a moment where it's lunacy and we laugh. You know, I have such an anger rage toward Tim Dillon right now that I can't...

I can't even... He was supposed to be the guest today, guy. Yeah, I can't even... I feel like our friendship is over. Or just FaceTime him right now and patch it up. Yeah. He's not going to pick up. Just be like, hey, if you just FaceTime, show him that he's on the pod and everything's squashed.

If he picks up right now, everything's squashed. Ooh, it's a good test. Okay. That's a good test. Here we go. FaceTime. What's the over-under? I'm going to say he...

No. No. No. Yeah. Anybody? I think he'll answer. Oh, 100 bucks? He probably thinks he knows a bit.

I say no. 100? George. 200. Stop waiting until it looks like he's not answering. Just do not take it. That's like all the bets. Wow.

That's a double stab. That was definitely a double stab. Tim was supposed to be on this and he's in New York. Yeah. And that's it. How do you feel? How do I feel? Watching Tim Dylan on stage, I have to say he's the funniest guy I've ever seen.

I mean, a couple of months ago I was following him or vice versa in the main room and I was watching him and I was going, this could be the greatest comic I've ever seen. Everything that he says resonates with me. His boldness, his takes on things, his energy. I mean, he's everything to me. And then when we're hanging out backstage or when I went to his Christmas party, he's the nicest guy in the world, but it does hurt that he's never done our podcast. And we're going on tour together.

We're doing a big stadium thing with Schultz, me, Tim Dylan, Shane Gillis. I'm opening. You're the opener? Yeah, I'm in the beginning of the show, but I'm a part of the tour. But I forgive him. I love him. I just think it hurts, but I can't. I don't want to live my life in front of like other great comedians because I always

hold my tongue because I feel like I want everyone to like me, but it's like I also, you know, my stock is up and I want to be able to fight for who I am and how I feel. And I don't want to worry if people are not going to like me. By the way, you don't need your stock to be up to fight for who you are. I understand that. I understand that. You should be that way baseline. I should take that advice.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You're right. I want to be able to just stand up for myself and that's what I'm doing, but please call me back, please. Final messages from you guys to your audience. The Slep Kingdom. Can you believe we've done 400 episodes? That's insane.

That's insane. This is insane. All my firm skin years are behind me. Yeah. Still firm. You look the same. You look the same. I mean, you know, I have to say the last 10 years, you know, of my life has been my best

10 years. Yeah. And Tiger Belly is definitely a big part of that. It's been my best years in terms of really living a life worth living, you know, and Tiger Belly has given me a voice and it kind of reinvented who I am. And it got me back back in the game. It's caused a lot of controversy to podcasting in general, but I wouldn't trade it in for the world.

And it's just been a big part of my life and I'm so grateful for it. What about you? I changed my life. Are you kidding me? Yeah. You know, my mom and both of my sisters are nurses. I thought that that was the path I was supposed to follow because I needed to put food on a table, pay my rent, and this was like an accidental thing, you know, like, and it was

an accidental job, an accidental joy, but, you know, a joy nonetheless. You look exactly the same as I first met you. You kind of do. Really? You really do. You look aged a minute to me. You look younger. You look younger, yeah.

I mean, you're beautiful, but you know, it's remarkable how you haven't aged. Neither have you, Bobby. Oh, my God. I have white hairs on my mustache now. Yeah, but I swear to you, like, even when I touch, like, the skin on your back. The skin's pure. It's like rhino hide. Like, there's no sag.

It's so tight. Your butt is really tight. Yeah, you look incredible. It's just a room full of people watching you guys flirt, but that's fine. You want to hit it or what? Well, hey, look at me. You want to hit it or what? Oh, my God.

As I cackle like a hyena. I get nervous. I get nervous. I love you. I love you guys. I love everyone in the room. Thank you for being here. Happy 400th to us.

Happy 400th. We're going to keep on going. It's just a room full of people watching you guys flirt, but that's fine. Thank you, guys. Bye, new merch and www.sleptkingdom.com. The Accidentals, everybody.