Timcast IRL - Sunday Uncensored: Dave Landau Member Podcast: Jill Biden Calls Hispanics "Tacos" Crew Has To See Naked Hunter Biden But It's Funny

Episode Date: July 17, 2022

Tim & Co. host comedians Dave Landau and Jamie Kilstein for a hilarious uncensored segment available in video format on Timcast.com Monday through Thursday every week. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Every week, we produce four uncensored episodes of the TimCast IRL podcast, exclusively at TimCast.com. And we're going to bring you the most important for our weekend show. If you want to check out more segments just like this, become a member at TimCast.com. Now, enjoy the show. Jill Biden is being ripped by the right, I'll do air quotes, for saying the Hispanic community are as unique as breakfast tacos. Oh my gosh. Hell yeah, dude.

Tacos and burritos. The right rips Jill Biden. Can I just give a simple, fuck you, the hill. Come on. We have this from the NAHJ. NAHJ encourages FLOTUS and a communications team to take the time to better understand the complexities of our people and communities We are not tacos

Our heritage as Latinos is shaped by various diasporas, cultures, and food traditions Wait a sec, real quick Was that a real quote saying we are not tacos? Yes Amazing It's right there, bro Hell yeah, dude It's its own paragraph

We are not tacos National Association of Hispanic Journalists Right, Hispanic Journalists These are not tacos national association of hispanic journalists right hispanic journalists these are not right wingers so this is how um fucking stupid oh my gosh yeah everything i like that yeah uh the biden family out of your jib the cut of my jib uh well here we go we'll kick it off with that jill biden said hispanics are as unique as tacos. She also said the Bogotas of the Bronx. What is Bogota? Bodega.

Oh, Bodega. Bodega is a corner store in New York. She's being a hashtag ally. La Tinks. Bogota is a city in Spain. Maybe that's what she got. Bogota. Bogota.

B-O-G-O-T-A. She got the D and the G mixed up. She's like a step away. generic food they could have picked. It's like Italians and the G mixed up. She's like a step away. Generic food they could have picked. Yeah. It's like Italians are as unique as spaghetti. Can I just point out something weird? Look at this.

It says the Hill has removed its comment section as there are many other forums for readers to participate in the conversation. We invite you to join the discussion on Facebook and Twitter. This is Google's results are rapidly changing. They will not allow any kind of feedback on this because they know it's wrong. What we wanted to do, we don't have comments anymore, and I don't want to say too much because we're working on censorship

resilient comment systems. That's what we're trying to do. I do think it's weird how this thing happened where you can't comment anymore. Why? Because people would just respond with racisms or something? Is that what they're worried about? You guys know about the dead internet theory?

No. We talked about it before. Yeah. The idea is that around 2016, the internet completely died. Corporations came in. Most content is not user-generated anymore. Most profiles are bot accounts, and it's to simulate acceptable public opinion to control the narrative. It's like the horror movie where it's like, but she died 25 years ago. Yeah, exactly.

But then you think about how all of a sudden comment sections everywhere are getting removed and it's like, that's weird. A lot of this is like login with Facebook shit. So they use Facebook comments on the... That's probably it. Centralizing it. Too much vulnerability.

Yeah. You might be right. They just don't want to take on the responsibility of like a five... What are they called at the the 230, Section 230 reform bullshit that they go back through all their stuff and they're like, take this down, take this down, take this down. Right. I think it's partly to – like similar with YouTube, how they got rid of the dislike button. Like it's still there but you can't see it anymore.

Yeah, only the – what is it? Only the people that have the page can see it now. Yeah. Yeah, that's the whole idea. I think the issue is like that New York nuclear attack thing, there's no comments. Joe Biden, there's no comments or likes and all that stuff. Because then people would – you know what? Like, the dead internet theory is kind of real, but not real in the way they think.

The fact that all these news outlets got rid of their comment sections, the fact that, like, so many of these youtube videos from the government don't allow you to comment at all so you can't actually see the dissent you can't see that people would be like we don't like joel biden she's dumb as a fucking box of rocks and she's a racist no they get rid of all that well they just be accurate not not joe uh hunter biden he called asian people yellows oh hunter biden called asians yellow in text exchange with Cousin. Was he ordering one? Yes.

Goodness gracious. Yes. Was he really? Oh, my God. Yes. He's like, give me a yellow to drag across state lines. No. And then he hits a gong.

Look at this. Here's the text. She's a legend. Make him sing Deck the Halls in a very racist fashion while i eat christmas dinner that would be a funny bit like there was a didn't didn't someone do a bit where they hired hookers and when they showed up they said we want you to clean the floors and they went fuck you no yeah why would you degrade me here look at this look at me over like a real man look at these texts she's a legend none of

these women except for diva but nicola and diva and ella and lucy will all know quality girls who are like i am distrusting and very hot and highly highly wary of evil i also have denise a german 26 no to lucy i think okay so fine do you want a foreign or domestic and you have to make the pitch directly i can't give you fucking Asian. Sorry, I'm not doing it. Domesticated foreigner. It's fine. I'd give you Isabella, but she has kids and an NBA ex-husband.

No yellow. Yasmina. Like, what the fuck are they talking about? Whoa. What is this about? He looks like he's getting ready to buy the services of a woman and looking at different patrons to put him in touch with. There may not like the Lakers.

They're haggling ladies. Okay, so that's him and his cousin. How much do you think they hooked up? Was that the one that gave him the old footsie roll? Oh, was that his cousin who did that? No. I thought it was his sister or something. I thought it was his cousin who gave him the foot job.

Can we see that on this part? Oh, this part you can see. He gave him the fucking foot job. Yeah cousin who gave him the foot job uh well can you see that on this part yeah oh this part you can say a fucking foot job yeah i gave it the old fucking foot job okay tossed around his bills i need a yellow and i need a fucking foot job so do you guys want me should i pull up the pictures of hunter biden's dong you can look at it and then i mean do we also get this are there ladies in it or is it just hunter yeah is that his cousin because that definitely does look incestual I'm being a hundred percent and he also has a very night at the Roxbury chain so this is the thing I was pointing out do you

see Hunter Biden's dick because you can rather not I can see it from here that's right that's right take a good look it's naked in a pool the I think the thing I'm the most the the first picture is infinitely more upsetting than him jer the most the first picture is infinitely more upsetting than him jerking off

the first picture literally just looks like he regretfully buried a body of like a hit and run it looks like he just got back from a Ted Kennedy drive he's like I don't know what happened to Susan did you have a towel did the daily caller think that he's quick find me a pool to jerk off in

that's the second... Pretend I was here in the pool. Hey, you can see that he's grabbing his junk. Yes. Oh, yeah. Hold on. These pictures to me now, it's a flip book. It's in order.

Buried a body, then panicked, went to masturbate in the pool, then smoking after he came. Yeah. If it's innocent, it's just dipped his head in. Yep. Decided to take a dip, tried cigarettes for the first time. That's better. Thank you, Dave. I appreciate that.

There's your spin. I like how they circled his head. His face. It's like, don't look down. Don't look down. Yeah, they really did highlight. They highlighted the wrong head. Oh, can you believe that?

Crazy. Look, this guy has a face. Here he is. Oh, look at that frown he's got. Oh, can you believe that? Crazy. Oh, my gosh, that's crazy. Look, this guy has a face. Here he is. Oh, look at that frown he's got. Oh, no. What a wacko. Hunter Biden hacked Snopes. They don't even...

What are you talking about Snopes? What is that? What do we got? 4chan explodes after it allegedly hacked Hunter Biden. The Daily Dot. Ooh, good stuff. So I had to look at a bunch of these hacked things that they were posting, and a lot of it is like Hunter banging women and shit.

Yeah. Like the one of him sending a text message to his dad is basically like a woman bent of these hacked things that they were posting and a lot of it is like Hunter banging women and shit. Yeah. Like the one of him sending a text message to his dad is basically like a woman bent over and he's just from behind.

Oh, okay. I was actually trying to figure out what you were talking about during the show. It's a virtual Christmas card. Yeah, basically.

It's animated. He did spell out happy holidays on her back. Yeah, he did. It's like lines. Let me see if i can pull up something from uh

so this is we have the the form formally the donald it's patriots.win patriot.win patriot and i'm wondering if they have the uh what is this hey if you made me look at him masturbating by himself in a pool can i at least see him fucking a girl yeah but like i'm wondering like where you can get him because oh got it there was one i saw earlier i think it is old though where he's just like twirling around a gun right you know he's just naked like next to his bed jesus i don't know if he's doing meth or oh jesus has nothing to do with it nobody's uh i got I don't know if he's doing meth or, oh, Jesus, has nothing to do with it. Nobody's got,

I don't know if it's meth or cocaine or crack. I know it's not cocaine. Like, one of the things they call him Peto Peter on the phone because apparently Biden called himself Peter Henderson or something.

Who was like a character. Oh, that was like his pseudonym or something? Yeah, like a Tom Clancy character who betrays his country and sells it. Wow. Are you kidding?

No, no. Just call yourself Jack Ryan, bro. Call yourself the hero. This is hilarious. Look at this picture. His daughter on the lips, his daughter on the lips, his daughter on the lips,

his wife on the cheek. Gross. Thank you to our good friends over at Patriots. Wow. I don't know if the... It's so weird with the kid. That's just weird.

Kissing his granddad on the lips? I mean, my parent... Yeah, I've never been kissed on the lips. By a parent? No. No. Not a closed mouth. I've been jerked off to completion.

Okay, that's a little different. After our show, baby. Yeah, okay. Sorry, baby. Yeah, but still. I get kicked off. I'm the only guest who gets kicked off the after our show. There's one rule in what we do, and it's no kissing on the mouth.

That's right. Everything else. Yes, indeed. We're not gross. Well, please. Let's see. It's pretty woman rules. We'll see if I can find some photos, but we do have this tweet from Cernovich.

This is a good point. He says, it was treated as a huge story when some reporters found out that Don Jr. and Eric posted in a hunting forum. It was a major scoop. They didn't even post anything dodgy, but finding this forum,

huge story. Today, we've got Hunter Biden. So wait, what was the hunting thing? Just them hunting? They posted in the forum. They were just like... They were like old photos

of them doing like culling or something. Yeah. Yeah. Hunting is... It was actually just hunting, right, though? hunting right though yeah like hunting animals yeah that's what i thought not like hunting prostitutes and dragging them across state lines no or like even hunting rhinos or whatever like a tiger like a dentist on a bait pile like it wasn't anything bad it was just i think it was some people hunt deer yeah yeah yeah just deer hunting i got this

thing where like i'm got i'm looking at texts apparently hunter biden referred to jill biden as a vindictive fucking what does he say vindictive cunt yeah yeah like apparently she beat him or something and like there's like a text message where he talks about how she abused him or some shit and i'm like staring at it like if am i is this just like drama like real what do they call like reality tv drama trash that's taking my eyes off the fucking federal reserve probably but i mean at the same point it's the president's son you can't fucking ignore i mean you can't you can't really ignore it you can acknowledge it look whether or not it upsets you is up to you it's the president's son who does business with the president yes yes it's the president's business partner yes exactly well i also feel that there's probably a lot of validity to it because if you look at his age i mean he's how old now 52 52 came up in a certain age i

guarantee you they were abusive whether or not you know we you whatever degree they were there was emotional abandonment i assure you there was abuse there's no doubt about it i'm sure she was a certain way if you see him when he's you know all together he's very uh dominating he's very he's almost cruel really when you see him when he's talking to like clarence thomas and stuff like it's very oh yeah just dropping the n-word you know it's really it's pretty amazing how joe biden did carry himself at one time i bet joe biden beat hunter oh for sure no i mean like he really i think beat him quite badly and i'm sure she was very emotional and a very fit and very physically abusive i mean i'm

sure they both had extremely poor hunter of all not poor i'm just imagining this little boy hunter biden i but i bet and he walks in the kitchen and he's got like a potato sack on for clothing and he's like please I'm hungry and he goes

what come on man he rips the belt off just whacking mercilessly beating him and Jill's going yeah fucking get him

get him Jill fucking make him bleed she grabs a big spoon she's like time for dessert Hunter and then Hunter's like one time for dessert, Hunter. And then Hunter's like, one day I'll find crack. One day.

No, no. Then he falls on the ground. There's Parmesan cheese. And he crawls over to it. And he licks it. And then, because he was hungry, right? So then, it's a sad, tragic story. One day, he's 18, he's in college.

And he sees on the carpet what he thinks is Parmesan cheese. So for some reason, he smokes it yeah it was crack yeah this is all and he's wearing the same potato sack at the time he starts selling it for our frat initiation he smoked what he thought was parmesan cheese because it was like a thing he formed and then he was like what's happening i feel so good and they're like yeah that wasn't parmesan that was crack and he was like wow i'm telling you and this girl goes for five dollars i give you a kiss it was actually like it was can you get me a yellow friend to do it it was actually a sad story um he was ordering street parmesan for spaghetti and it was nice with crack

can you believe it that's how he got hooked on it hunter biden's gonna be the true hero he's gonna blow up joe and all this stuff and he's going to be the hero in the story who was abused and everyone riddled him. They're going to make a statue

of Hunter of like the man who stopped Joe Biden. But the statue of him is like him smoking

crack naked. Except from here, Don's an ice cube. When Joe will leave office with a circle around his head

Hunter will go on the redemption tour and everyone there will be all this love for Hunter he was abused by his father and then he's going to accidentally smoke crack again

and then it'll just disappear from the movie. I like the idea that you said he's weakened at Bernie's sobriety. Yes. Like they fixed his teeth.

Yeah. He smokes crack and then they're like alright are you with it? Okay come do the speech and claim to be sober and then as soon as he gets in the car he's crack and then they're like all right are you with it okay come do the speech and claim to be sober and then as soon as he gets in the car he's like oh and then he yeah yeah some crack again he's on he was on the today show and they even had pictures of him like getting his teeth fixed almost like three days before i just and then he's on there and he's just like yeah

you know i used to smoke a lot of you smoke a lot of parmesan cheese. He's having withdrawal right now. He's on the show and he keeps going. Yeah. Are you getting choked up about your dad? Hey, why did your rider only say no green M&Ms and crack? Have you guys ever been around someone who just did a bunch of blow? Oh, yeah. I was a coke. So Joe Biden comes on the Today Show. I was around Dave in in comedy. So Joe Biden comes on the Today Show.

I was around Dave in the 90s. Joe Biden comes on the Today Show and he's sitting there going like this and he's like looking around and he's like, dude, dude, dude,

I got to tell you this story. It's like to my dad. He's like going to China because like, dude, China's really, really bad. But you got to understand, it's not about China, dude. It's also about Ukraine.

Like Ukraine, there's gas. People are getting so mad about this. But like the oil prices are so high. Like I'm telling you. They're just like putting Xanax into a drink,

and they're like, here you go. Here you go, bud. That's him before the show, and then he drinks it, and he goes, my dad helped me become a better man. So it's like the Xanax combined

with the Coke normalizes. It's normal. Yeah, yeah, yeah. A doctor comes in like he's Elvis. They're like, all that matters is he looks normal on that show today. There's a stopwatch,

and they're like, you've got 12 minutes. Yeah. Go. And then he's Elvis. They're like, all that matters is he looks normal on that show today. There's a stopwatch and they're like, you've got 12 minutes. Yeah. Go. And then Hunter's like, oh. He's just even enough to sit in a chair.

So fucked up. I got the, I got the impulse that he's going to kill himself. Hunter is. You know what's crazy? I actually, I thought about that.

I didn't say it out loud, but I thought about that when we started this though. But I mean, what's that? I don't know that. I didn't say it out loud, but I thought about that when we started this, though. But I mean, what's that? I don't know if we'll do it on purpose. Maybe that's how Biden drops out. Like, here's Hunter dies. Then Joe will do the sympathy thing.

That's the only way out. It's so sad. I don't want Hunter to kill himself, man. No, I don't either. Listen, listen. Donald Trump is apparently going to announce the run for the presidency in fall this year. He showed the plane and everything. And he's even contemplating his reports that he's going to announce early.

If he does, Biden is fucked. What can Joe Biden do? We know the Democrats don't want him to run. He can't win. So he'll need to bow out. Why would he bow out? If he bows out early, Trump goes, Joe Biden ran away. The Democrats can't handle it.

I've won. My son needs help. Or Joe Biden ran away. The Democrats can't handle it. I've won. My son needs help. Or Joe Biden is old and he gets sick or something happens. Donald Trump says he can't handle it. You can't vote for him. He's sick. But there is one way out for him that doesn't hurt the Democrats. Hunter becomes sick or dies.

And Joe says, my only children, this is not the life for me. Thank you, America. I'm sorry. I did my best. I'm riding the Amtrak into the sunset. That's right. And then the Democrats don't lose. The Democrats go, you know, we had a great president in Joe Biden despite all his hardships,

and he bowed out because of family, and we respect that. Donald Trump should not be bringing this up. That's the only way they have out. Yeah. You're 100% right. If any of his advisors hear this show right now they're gonna be like we have to kill no i think they're just thinking everyone in this room or severe illness like he might not die yeah but like if he has like an od and he's like in the

hospital he's comatose or something yeah they might just be like or really needs that rehab to the point where you're gonna see some change in him that actually works. Because, I mean, to get sober, you have to want to be sober. And that's a guy who doesn't want to be sober. He's fighting. They're like, no, man. No! And they're dragging him off. And they're like, it's for his own good.

He's losing it. He's just on intervention, just drinking Listerine. Trying to get him to go to bed. Hey, is Hunter Biden my mom? I've got the vanilla extract and Listerine, baby. I have like, the one part of my brain is sympathy and love for this man, and I want his best future. But the other part of me is like, he's a corrupt businessman that's been fucking selling our country out. I want harsh justice.

So I don't know. Part of that, too, for me, though, is like, what else do you do? Like, what else is he supposed to do? And again, I guess you could morally make a different choice but at the same time can you i mean i i guess i don't know i've never walked in those shoes to be him like i i do have empathy for hunter i have none for joe so i i think joe is a i think joe is a sociopath i think he's a narcissist i don't think he has a soul i don't think he cares about his kids i really don't i really think he's a narcissist. I don't think he has a soul. I don't think he cares about his kids. I really don't. I really think he's an evil, evil son of a bitch.

I believe that. I remember there was – I've seen two comics. One, I don't know if he's like outed, but like heavy into drugs. Very, very famous. Heavy into like hard drugs like this. And I did a – there was like a tv showcase in australia and he was on it and he actually seemed really nice but all of his fucking agents and these yes men around him literally applauding in circles when he would make jokes treating him like a like a special royal child and then i

remember i did um i had this weird dinner and andy was there and Andy Dick was sober and he was being super fucking cool. And I had to go to a set and he goes, hey, let me come to your set. And again, super fucking cool. And we were talking about depression and we were talking about recovery and I told him that Robin really helped me with my depression. And he was telling me that Chris Farley gave him the big book his like book of aa yeah and he was like you know really trying to stay sober and the second we got to this shitty fucking comedy club all of these disgusting like hanger-ons were offering him coke and offering him booze because they wanted their um i'm getting fucked up with andy dick story so the reason i bring this up is because you take someone like hunter biden we're

just talking about comics right you take someone as Hunter Biden. We're just talking about comics, right? You take someone as powerful as Hunter Biden, even if homeboy wanted to get sober, when you are just surrounded by sycophants and yes men and people who are using you to either get to your dad or whatever. It's, I mean, borderline impossible to get help, even if you want help. Now, I'm not saying he's a good person and he wants help or whatever but like man it's one thing you know you wanted to get sober you probably had some good fucking people in your life who wanted to help you whereas i feel like when you're that powerful if you don't want to get sober everyone's just going to enable you give you everything you want and not question you at all you're a 30 000 a month house in malibu that's

being funded by the taxpayers yeah that you're allowed to do drugs in i mean it's a big difference yes and yeah andy dick there's always that funny story with norm mcdonald where chris farley went to a bathroom with andy dick and uh i guess uh norma down looks at arie lane goes well there's only two reasons you go into a bathroom with andy Dick and neither one of them are good. Norm was the best. Number one greatest in my opinion. You say that Hunter has a $30,000 house amount? He does.

Isn't it $30,000 a month? $30,000 a month, yeah. Where he's allowed, guarded by security, what do you call them? Secret service. Secret service, thank you. Someone posted the joke from Dirty Work, where Norm is like, look at all these dead hookers, and the guy's trying to close the trunks.

And it's all Hunter. Right, yeah, exactly. They're like the Hunter Biden scandal, and Norm's like, you know, they're all popping open. And the guy's Twitter. He's trying to shut it all down. I've never seen so many dead hookers in all my life. That movie was great. Dirty Work's so underrated. That is the

funniest movie, dude. And the original script is amazing. The best bar fight of all time. Where he's like, G7, Rolling Stone Street Fighters. You press G8. Wham! Chair shot. Entire bar, Street Fighter. So you press G8. Do you like being in a club? I just wham, chair shot. Yeah.

An entire bar fight to that. Oh, Bob Saget did that. Yeah, he directed it. Yeah, he directed it. Wow. Yep. The fish scene. It's one of Farley's greatest roles

because he's basically the unlikable one. Yes. And he's just garbage. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's Lee Ming, the Saigon whore that bit my nose off. I've got to see it.

I haven't seen it yet. Oh, have you not seen it? It's fantastic. I don't think I'll watch it with you, Ian. I'm saying it. Norm are dead. I know. Such a sad, sad year for that, too.

And Norm held cancer, what was it, 11 years, I think, he fought it and never told anybody. And people were, yeah. I mean, I. His last special was beautiful. It was awesome. Just him at home into his computer. We. Hilarious.

You know, I didn't want to. I'm stuttering because I'm like, I don't want to sound like name dropping. But I also think it's like cool to say. And if you had any experiences with Norm, anyone who did can validate. We have pages of direct messages on Twitter, pages, all about comedy, censorship, cancel culture. And the reason I'm saying that is because he cared. I've never seen anyone. Like, I mean, dude, he would just write these, like, monologues about how much he cared about comedy, about free speech.

Like it was so authentic and so legitimate. Like he loved nothing more than comedy and like the purest fucking way. I thought about if you released those, if it were like the McDonald Chronicles or something, and he'd be like, I don't give a fuck. But like his people might not. I mean, he wouldn't, but like I would just feel weird doing it. But like it's cool to have. And like I've shown a couple of like my friends and shit like that just because it's dope. He was fucking smart, man.

We should set up like a private space where only like rich and famous people get to watch that stuff and really experience it. The poor people don't get to watch any of that stuff. One bite Hunter. It's in one of those New York apartments that won't be affected by a nuclear bomb. No, it'll be in a $30,000 a month mansion with blow-in hookers. Yeah, it'll be great. They're called yellows, Tim.

We like walk in and Hunter's like, man, you're making bank off those videos about me, Tim. And I'll be like, haha, we cheers. We got him. We got him. We got him, baby. It'll be like the Playboy Mansion, watching a porn star blow in a dog. Oh, classic.

No, that's real. Have you been to the Playboy Mansion? No, no, but those are old stories. I wanted to. My friend got to go once. That's still a thing? No, no, he's dead. In fact, the company kind of went under, but the deal was if you bought the house, you

had to let him live in it still. So you just had. Yeah. So if you bought the Playboy mansion, you just had this perverted voyeur living upstairs. You can fuck his wife, but he's hanging up above you watching. Just eyes. We got to bring that back. But who's going to.

Jamie. Yes. Can you be our lascivious old man? Oh, yeah. Oh, perfect. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah lascivious old man? Oh, yeah. Oh, perfect. Yeah, yeah, yeah. A hundred percent. This is my man.

According to Jezebel.com, I already am. We'll hire a bunch of young, beautiful women in a talent role for a show. Yep. And they have to be hanging out on you. Yeah, you don't have to ask me twice, buddy. Yes. I used to do – it was the Artie Lane and Anthony show, and I got there, and Artie was saying when he first did it, or went to the Playboy Mansion, it was for stand-up comedy.

And it's like all these beautiful bunnies, and then the grotto and the famous things. Then the second, that whole party ends, the real women come, and it's just these toothless comedy. Oh, no. And Artie's not exactly filled with standards. And even he's just like, what is this? I'm not touching any of this.

Where are the pretty girls going? That's just for show. Yo, yo, yo. We're in West Virginia. That woman looks like Hugh Hefner. We're in West Virginia. And there's a gentleman's club. There's a bunch of them in one area.

And we drove past it because we were going to buy fireworks and then go let them off. And we saw the sign. It said, come visit our daytime dancers for a gentleman's club. I have to go. And it's like two things. I have to go to this. Two things. For a bit.

Everybody knows daytime strippers are the bad ones and when you have to advertise to try and get people to come in they must be especially bad oh right i didn't even think about that right they like throw in the buffet for free that's the worst part too you're like oh well the buffet is free you want to be sitting there like these eggs are delightful dude that'd be like this is like This fat old woman And she's like Thrusting in front of you And you're like It's worth the bang

Dude, I feel like I would get syphilis From the eggs Can you believe It's turkey sausage? It really doesn't taste like it I remember when I was growing up A crab Benedict

Yeah You know what Well, it's really just Benedict People used to say all the time Crabs Benedict This is what I couldn't stand Because people would go Hooters actually has really good food.

I like to go there because the food's really good. And I believed it the first time. I was like 18. And I was like, really? And they're like, oh, yeah, dude, the wings are great. And I was like, oh, okay, I'll go. And then I go and the food was shit. But then we had big tits.

And so I'm like, you lied to me. So it goes. You're like, this is what it is. Yeah. You could have just said you wanted to look at girls' tits. Yeah. Whatever, dude. You want to get bad food and look at nice tits.

Correct. Yeah. I don't know. Maybe it was the Hooters I went to. The food was shit. It's one of those things that you would hear from someone that probably heard it from someone that the food was great. And it's an excuse.

Because someone was embarrassed. They wanted to go stare at tits. Read the articles on Playboy. That's what it is. We had a Hooters in the hotel we were staying at to do comedy. This is like 15 years ago. Just killing it at life. And we went downstairs to eat at Hooters because why not?

You have to. And we're sitting there and there was this girl celebrating her birthday party with her dad, which was the saddest thing I've ever seen with balloons, just her and her dad. That's cool you got to see Joe Biden before he became president. I know, right? And there's this guy at another table and he just looks over and he goes, how old's your daughter? He goes, 13.

And he goes, nice. Oh, what the fuck? And my friend Chris and I were just like, we were crying. We were like, this is the worst thing. That's a commercial for Hooters.

That's Hooters. And it still is an inside joke where anytime we've even to this day even send each other a text, we immediately just go, nice. Jamie is deceased. It was the creepiest thing I've ever

seen. That's a commercial for Hooters That we should just make Holy shit Hooters Oh fuck Oh my god We We

We gotta do We have an idea Of doing fake commercials For Cast Castle Yeah Okay So we gotta do shit like this A hundred percent

A hundred percent Please Yeah How old's your daughter Nice Nice Hooters Watch the big game on Sunday 100%. Please. Yeah. How old's your daughter? Nice. Hooters, watch the big game on Sunday. Bring your kids.

Just her sitting on her dad's lap, sadly, with a balloon. Bring your daughter, who clearly her mom died. That's terrible. It was so sad. I'm definitely going to hell. Bring your daughter for the one weekend you're allowed to see her Yeah For good reason Your first unsupervised

We're going to get a bunch of emails We're going to get a bunch of membership cancellations I brought my daughter to Hooters For her birthday Maybe you shouldn't have done that. What the fuck? There's nothing wrong with that. I go for the wings. That's right.

There was, when people were talking about the drag queen story ever shit, people were like, the leftists were like, well, look at these little boys at Hooters. And all the conservatives were like, that is also bad. It's also bad. But they were like, do you think it's conservative Christians bringing their children to Hooters? No, it's like liberal urban city dudes doing it.

You're complaining about yourself. Right. I got an idea. John Levine from the New York Post wrote, can conservatives actually articulate like what's wrong with drag queen story hour? All they say is it's just bad. And I was like, wow. And I was like, OK. I was like, clearly you've not seen any of our shows talking about it

but I just quote tweeted him I put go go dancer story hour okayed by John Levine because what people don't understand is drag is inherently sexual drag performers all know it but they're doing a non-sexualized performance for kids but it's

like having a go go dancer read a book to a kid right so we that's the gag i'm like okay let's what do you think would happen if we made a flyer for like go-go dancer story hour for your children bring your five-year-olds and it's like a picture of this big bimbo-y busty big tittied woman and she's like smiling and holding a book and she like thrusts while like reading like parents would be like i don't want that like then why would you want the drag queen to do the same thing because they were doing that right no it's true and it's also your kid thinks it's a clown like whatever you're doing like it's not working because your kid's just

showing up and being like there's this painted thing and i i think it's a clown i really do think that's what kids think that'd be so terrifying a clown with the naked ass like yeah you're like i remember there was a very sexual clown at my birthday party. Imagine Bozo. Magnum condoms making animals. Just these greasy elephants. I'm imagining this little kid sitting on his mom's lap with his birthday cake. And she's like, blow out your candles.

And there's a clown next to him thrusting towards the cake with him them like right here just like the clown's like how old's he nice the clown's name is candles that child that child's name all right man dave thanks for hanging out this has been hilarious it's been a blast oh dude thanks for having me it's been wanting to come. Oh, dude, thanks for having me. It's been a while to come for a long time. Thank you for having me. Appreciate it, dude.

Thank you. And for everybody who's a member, we got a ton of stuff we're planning. We've been talking about it. Big announcement potentially coming tomorrow. Really appreciate all of your support. Thanks for hanging out. We'll see you all next time.