Timesuck with Dan Cummins - 107 - The Lost Colony of Roanoke

Episode Date: October 1, 2018

In 1587, Englishman John White led a group of 118 colonists to what was supposed to Roanoke Island. One hundred fifteen of those colonists were never seen again after White returned to England to get word to Sir Walter Raleigh that the colonists desperately needed supplies. On August 18th, 1590, John White returned to Roanoke three years after leaving to get those supplies and found the settlement completely deserted and the word “Croatoan” carved into a fence post. And historians, archaeologists and others have been trying to figure out what happened to those initial settlers ever since. Hear there story and take a look into the most popular possibilities, today, on Timesuck! Merch - https://badmagicmerch.com/ Want to try out Discord!?! https://discord.gg/tqzH89v Want to join the Cult of the Curious private Facebook Group? Go directly to Facebook and search for "Cult of the Curious" in order to locate whatever current page hasn't been put in FB Jail :) For all merch related questions: https://badmagicmerch.com/pages/contact Please rate and subscribe on iTunes and elsewhere and follow the suck on social media!! @timesuckpodcast on IG, @timesuckpodcast on Twitter, and www.facebook.com/timesuckpodcast Wanna be a Space Lizard? We're over 3000 strong! Click here: https://www.patreon.com/timesuckpodcast Sign up through Patreon and for $5 a month you get to listen to the Secret Suck, which will drop Thursdays at Noon, PST. You'll also get 20% off of all regular Timesuck merch PLUS access to exclusive Space Lizard merch. You get to vote on two Monday topics each month via the app. And you get the download link for my new comedy album, Feel the Heat. Check the Patreon posts to find out how to download the new album and take advantage of other benefits. And, thank you for supporting the show by doing your Amazon shopping after clicking on my Amazon link at www.timesuckpodcast.com

On July 4, 1584, English explorer sent by Sir Walter Raleigh landed on Roanoke Island, and what is now the area known as the Outer Banks North Carolina. Roughly 8 miles long and 2 miles wide, the little island lies just about 2 miles off Man's Harbor on the mainland, and less than a mile from the barrier islands near Nag's Head. Good spot for settlement, barrier islands protecting you from the full fury of the Atlantic, and a couple miles of water between you and possible hostile forces on the mainland. The fortification possibilities of an island with easy canoe access to the mainland. After an initial botched attempt to establish a settlement there, Raleigh sent a second group

of colonists in 1587, led by John White. Within he brought his adult daughter, Eleanor White Dare, his son-in-law, and a nice Aston Mason. Soon after they arrived, Dare gave birth to a daughter who she named Virginia. And Virginia Dare was the first English child to be born in the present day United States. The 117 colonists of this second attempt arrived too late to plant crops and their situation quickly grew desperate. They persuaded White to return to England to plead for help but didn't work.

White arrived amid the Anglo-Spanish war meaning every English ship had been commandeered to fight the Spanish Armada. White wouldn't return to Roanoke for three years. When he finally did make it back he found the Roanoke colony utterly vacant and strangely so. There were no skeletal remains indicating that settlers had been attacked. Also the fort had been carefully dismantled showing that they hadn't left in a hurry. And on a fence post, someone had carved the word, Crowe Toan, the name of a group of American

Indians nearby. And scholars, archaeologists, and others have been trying to figure out what the hell happened to those first colonists ever since. Where did they go? What was their fate? Let's dig into the most enduring and vexing mystery of pre-colonial American life today on a perplexing edition of Time Suck. You're listening to Time Suck. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Happy Monday, Time Suckers.

Hail Nimrod, both Jangles and Lucifina, and praise Pudy, Juju, and triple him. Beware Chikotilo and Chikon Joe. Those are the ones you gotta keep your eyes on. Those are the ones you gotta watch out for. Guy here, you Derbex. I'm Dan Cummins, the master sucker of the profit in Nimrod, he has many nicknames, and you fellow meatzac are listening to Time Suck.

Recording today in the sucked dungeon, this fine fall day was Reverend Dr. Joe motherfucking paisley and queen of the suck Lindsey Cummins in advance of the shows that I now will have had at Helium and Portland, Oregon this past weekend. I hope they were splendid. I hope they were the absolute best. And I hope my shows this Friday and Saturday in Huntington Beach are even better at the rec room. And then my shows next week intooma, Washington also just as great.

Coming up soon. Flatters, tour standup shows and a live time suck podcast at the Tacoma Comedy Club, October 11th through the 14th. Links to the tickets always in the episode descriptions. Joe Pays, you're going to be with me, the Reverend Doctor on the 14th. Thanks for the continued reviews. And thanks for continuing to spread this suck, you guys. You guys and gals, it's so exciting.

More and more often now, I hear time suckers, you know, tell me about other people that they're talking to, you know, the tell them that they're listening to time suck, and then those people are like, oh yeah, no, I know about time suck. Yeah, I listened to. That's a great sign of growth, and it's just that much more motivation to keep giving my best of the suck.

It's been such a fun ride. And the ride continues in Columbus, Ohio, Buffalo, New York, Spokane, Washington, San Luis, Missouri, Grand Rapids, Michigan for the rest of 2018. All dates and available tickets listed at dankamas.tv. Thanks to everyone who's been grabbing the new merch, new hoodies have been especially popular. People loving that lemur belly button and King Cobra face skin. Thanks to Axis Apparel for giving the Shopify store facelift as well. Getting it to look so fresh, so clean.

And that's all the announcements for today. How about that? How about it? I know last week I had a lot, so this week I was keeping short. Got a balanced content and commerce. So dear listener, without further ado, let's dig into today's mystery, the last colony

of RONOKE. RONOKE A long requested topic, the last colony, what's going on over there? Well today it's a series of picturesque little coastal communities. There is the gorgeous little 1400 person town of Mantio, North Carolina that sits towards the northern end of the island just over three miles from where the original colony was built on the northern tip. Feeling pretty good about that pronunciation. Had a lot of people write in. We'll be talking about in the updates. A lot of pronunciation mistakes with Andrew Jackson, especially around the Carolinas, apparently. So I got to someone sent in a

North Carolina pronunciation guide and you know what? I used it. Yeah, Manteo, named after a big player in today's story. An American Indian chief named Manteo, a member of the Crow Tone tribe. Manteo had been taken to London in 1584 where he and another Indian won cheese, the last known chief of the Ronoke tribe that the island is named after, learned to become the liaisons between the Rhonoke, colony settlers, and the Indians, and had favorable interaction with British colonists John White. In fact, Mantia was Christian and given the name Lord of Rhonoke, making him the first American Indian to receive a title of nobility.

The only other significant town on Rhonoke island is Wanchise, named after the other chief, around 1700 people on the south end of the island. I've never been to the islands, but now I really want to go. Mantio, especially sounds super charming. It was named the seat of Dair County, named after Virginia Dair, in 1870 and incorporated in 1899, and when it incorporated every store lining the waterfront had two doors. How cute is this? One for those coming by boats,

and the other for those coming from the courthouse, or one of the ends on water street. How fun, just boat on up to the general store, boat on up to the courthouse, boat on over to the saloon, then boat just directly into the dock and then sink your ship and drown. The island itself has about 7,000 people,

has a big aquarium, regional airport, cupped museums, lighthouses, Fort Raleigh, National Historic Site, which preserves the site of the original lost colony of Ronoke. After the lost colony was, we know, well lost. American Indians lived apart from European settlers undisturbed for another 70 years. And then after the island was abandoned by American Indians, following a war between a Poetan tribe, the Jamestown colony in 1646, the English drove them out of the area.

And then in the late 17th century, early English pioneers settled the island. And it was until Mantia was founded in 1899 that the community had its first incorporated town. So took a while after that very, very early attempt to colonize it to actually, you know, gain an actual town. But you're not far, but you're not here, excuse me, from modern Roanoke history, I know that.

I know that. You hear to find out what happened to that original colony and me too. So let's start with the time-slug timeline, beginning with the events that led to the first colonization trip and ending with the disappearance of that first colony. In 1540, a future member of the second Rowan Oak Vogue that established the last colony, grandfather of Virginia Dare John White is born.

Actually his date of birth is not known, historians put it somewhere between 1540 and 1990. He lived to be possibly 450 years old. Look it up if you don't fucking believe me. Alright? Not don't do that. That's a huge waste of time. It's not true. He was born somewhere between 1540 and 1550.

He was most likely born in London as there are records of him attending church in London, the parish of St. Martin Ludgate. It's also a record him getting married to Thomas and Cooper in London in 1566, with whom he had a son and a daughter, and he would be brought on the initial expedition to Roanoke because he was a talented artist.

Centuries later, an expedition would bring a photographer to do what he was asked to do. Today, you would bring a videographer. He was commissioned to draw to life, the inhabitants of the New World and their surroundings. He would complete numerous watercolor drawings of the surrounding landscape and native peoples and these water colors have thankfully survived. Now, you can see the soul-surviving kind of visual record of American Indians first contact with English settlers. Do a Google image search if you have time. So it's worth it. Very, very cool. On 1554, English adventurer, writer, favorite courteer of Queen Elizabeth, the first man who

Raleigh North Carolina is named after and leader of the Roanoke voyage Sir Walter Raleigh is born. Or possibly in 1552. again, not the best birth records for everybody back there. At age 15, maybe 17, in 1569, he fought with the French Huguenots and the French religious civil wars, and then later studied at Oxford in 1572. Between 1579 and 1583, this young dude took part in the suppression of the Desmond Rebellions in Ireland.

When the Earl of Desmond, head of the Fitzgerald Dynasty, rebelled against the Queen of England, and then got punished. On 1580, he took part in the siege of Smurwick during the second Desmond Rebellion with a force of, or Winiforce, excuse me, of 400 to 600 papal soldiers from Spain and Italy captured the village of Smurwick and were besieged then by the English Army. They surrendered and then were massacred. Yes, massacred after they surrendered by Sir Walter Raleigh and Queen Elizabeth was impressed by his ruthlessness. For his part in the victory, Raleigh received 40,000 acres of Irish land including two entire towns.

He's now doing well for a dude in his 20s. He became a favorite of Queen Elizabeth while serving in her army in Ireland. And then they met in the spring of 1582. And she was smitten. He stood six feet tall, a head taller than most men of the day, and was described as handsome and of a muscular build. He was in his late 20s. She was 49.

He was ambitious and loyal to England. And she was a kingless and childish queen who longed for male companionship. He was the ideal companion, and she showered him with gifts. And then once a week, as payment for the riches she bestowed upon him, he was more than happy to lay on her lap and be held like a little baby man in suckle upon her teeth. That was their arrangement. It wasn't sexual. Elizabeth just liked to have her breast suckle upon, and it felt like it was wrong to force that on a child So she would let a man do it It wasn't allowed to touch her wasn't allowed to make eye contact He could adjust the nipple and attempt to get more pretend milk I guess that was the only way he could touch her and he had to have a clean shave and face and they would do this in front of attendance

Like it was no big deal They even did it one time in front of a emissary from Belgium ended up hurting Britain's diplomatic relations with Belgium for decades. And these suckling sessions are likely what put William on the fast track to be knighted by Queen Elizabeth in 1585, and two years later becoming captain of the Queen's Guard. And I doubt any of you are still following that, still believing that, the man, baby, Nipple suckling.

But if you are, God bless you. No, none of that happened. Other than the being knighted in becoming captain, that part is true. How great, how great though, the rest of the stuff was true. What a weird footnote in history that would be. Yes, you know, Queen and my bird of people, eccentric. She was eccentric. She did enjoy having a full grown man suckle upon her teeth.

Other than that, strong leadership qualities. Anyway, Raleigh was an early supporter of North American colonization, and in 1584, Queen Elizabeth, who did really, was really smitten with this guy, granted Raleigh a royal charter authorizing him to explore, colonize, and rule any, quote, remote heathen in barbarous lands, countries and territories, not actually possessed of any Christian prince or inhabited by Christian people. Of course you did. Just a license to kill anyone who isn't like us.

Everyone who's not English or at least you know Christian, it's fucking worthy of death. Ruthless. This is pretty much just the way people were back then, at least the ruling class of most nations. You're either one of us or you're less than human, you're savage. God is on our side and loves us the most and God wants us to do whatever we need to do to fucking win. So get ready, heathen, because death is coming.

Imagine if a leader of a so-called civilized nation did that today. Alright, Bill, you want to head across the sea and grab some land, loop for yourself. Alright, do it. So there's a few countries I want you to leave alone, but other than that, you do what you need to do. I'll find it. You have my permission to just fuck up, anybody want to fuck up especially North Korea. Just go get them. Go on now Life is a little different back before the concept of war crimes and the Geneva conventions Queen Elizabeth

Charter Raleigh in exchange for one fifth of the gold and other treasure he might find and this charter specified that Raleigh had seven years in which to establish a settlement, or else he would lose his right to do so. He had exclusive rights for a settlement for seven years. Raleigh and Elizabeth intended that the venture should provide riches from the new world and a base from which to send privateers on raids against the treasure fleets of Spain. On April 27, 1584, Raleigh dispatched an expedition led by Captain Philip, uh, excuse me, Captain Philip, Amados, uh, and Master Arthur Barlow to explore the eastern coast of North America with two ships piloted by veteran Portuguese navigators

Simon Fernandez, Amados, who commanded the flagship, which may have been Raleigh's 200 ton vessel, Barck Raleigh. It was a member of Raleigh's official household where he made his studied instrumental navigation and related mathematics, Barlow, Commander of the other vessel, possibly a smaller sailboat named the Dorothy had become one of Raleigh's servants in Ireland as early as 1580 or 1581. After sailing through the Canary Islands and the Caribbean, the two ships reached the mainland American coast on July 4th, 1584, exactly 192 years before the colonies with declared independence from Britain.

They suffered no hardships and no storms of any note in this journey. Nice omit of things to come on that first expedition. First expedition every about it is beauty. They sailed northward until they reached an entrance or river issuing into the sea. According to a later account by one Richard Butler, they landed first near present day uh, Oak, Oak recoke. Hopefully that's right. I use that fucking North Carolina pronunciation guy for that one. That doesn't look like it spelled it all to me, but Oak recoke is what they say. Uh, landed near uh, present day Oak recoke islands, though Barlow's journal suggests an initial landing farther north near present day Oregon inland. Uh, the exact

location difficult to determine because of centuries of change in the barrier islands. They shipped around quite a bit. And after Anker and the explorers went ashore on boats to view and take possession of the land next to joining for Queen Elizabeth I and their patron Raleigh. Barlow's journal provides an almost lyrical description of the land and exploration. This is pretty cool too.

If you wanna do something further, I mean, it's gonna send the footnotes to the bottom of the script, which you can find on the app, the notes on the PDF download. But, uh, online, there's, there's, uh, several, just free copies of Barlow's original journal entries, talking about, you know, basically, like, we're not basically, it's the, it's the first time somebody from England is seeing what is now the United States and describing what they're seeing.

Uh, here's the journal entry about Barlow's scene the North American kind of, for the very first time, first time someone who's British would ever lay eyes on the land of become US, it seems like it's a struggle at times to read is because it is not written in today's English, a lot of weird spellings. But I'm gonna do my best. He said, the fourth of the same month,

we arrived upon the coast, which we're supposed to be a continent in firm land, and we sailed along the same 120 English miles, before we could find any entrance or river issuing into the sea. The first that appeared onto us, we entered, though not without some difficulty, and cast anchor about three, Harkibus, shot within the Havensmouth on the left hand of the same. And after thanks given to God for our safe arrival, the other we manned our boats and we went to view the land next to joining and to take possession of the same. And in the right of the Queen's most excellent Majesty and rightful Queen and Princess of the

same and after delivered to the same to your use according to her Majesty's grant and let us patents under her highnessness great seal, which being performed according to the ceremonies used in such enterprises, we viewed the land about us, being where as we first landed, very sandy and low towards the waterside, but so full of grapes, as the very beating and surge of the sea overflowed them, of which we found such plenty, as well there as in all places else, both on the sand and on the green soil, on the hills, as in the plains, as well in every little shrub, as also climbing towards the tops of high cedars, that I think in all the world, the like abundance is not to be found.

And myself having seen those parts of Europe that most abound, first such difference as were incredible to be written. I love how thick the kiss ass late it or the kiss assory went on when he's talking about the queen. Man he just really just puckered up there. The queen's most excellent majesty, the rightful queen, and also the princess. God's finest work, if I may be so bold. More angels and woman, the object of every man's desire, but of course in a most respectful, not a dull lustful way.

But if one were to lust, they would certainly lust more for the queen than any other woman in history. The holiest of holies, the greatest of minds, the bravest of warriors, noblest of royals, the best dancer of the court, the teller of the funniest jokes, the songbird of her generation, most excellent kite flyer, very good at flying kite, the baker of the finest bun cakes, if the queen deemed bun cake baking, worthy of a delicate, yet powerful angel hands, that's quite enough, Arthur.

Yes, your highness. I'm sure it's just we had to do, right? You know, you had kids, queens, ass or your career, if not your life is over. It's still funny to me. Later, Barlow wrote of the first ever encounter between English colonists and American Indians living in present-day United States. He wrote, we remained on the side of this silent two whole days before we saw any people of the country.

The third day, we spied, small boats rowing towards us, having its three persons. This boat came to the island side, four hawkwubas shot from our ships, and the two of the people remaining. The third came along the shoreside towards us, and we, being then all within board, he walked up and down upon the point of land next unto us. Then the master and the pilot of the Admiral Simon Fernando in the Captain Philip Amaris, myself and others rode to the land, who was coming this fellow attended, never making any show or feel doubt. And after he had spoken of many things not understood by us, we brought him with his own good

liking aboard the ships and gave him a shirt, a hat and some other things, and made him taste of our wine and our meat, which he liked very well. And after having viewed both parks he departed and went to his own boat again, with which he had left in a little cove or creek adjoining, as soon as he was two-bow shoot in the water he fell to fishing. And in less than half an hour, he had laden his boat as deep as it could swim with which he came again to the point of the land and there he divided his fish into two pots pointing one pot to the ship and the other to the penis which after he had as much as might require to deform a benefits

received a pot of that of our site. They put lots of fucking weird easiness. It's like the pot seconds because like every word has an extra E at the end like boat is BOATD is D E E at the end. Like boat is BOATED, deep is DEPE, swim, they throw an extra M and it's SWIMME. I wanna read it like, his boat ESDP is, he could swim me with which HE came again, to the point of the land.

Anyway, so sad the thing started off so peacefully between English and American Indians man, sharing a food, giving a gift, and then for the Indians it ended so badly as we were reminded last week with Andrew Jackson, to the victor goes to the spoils, huh? And so often to the losers of war comes nothing but pain and sorrow. Man, what's the oldest of clichés? Just what life's not fair?

Man, sure isn't. Sometimes just buy your best efforts, you just end up on the wrong side of history. Anyways, Barlow also wrote the invitation from a tribal king, Anyways, Barlow also wrote the invitation from a tribal king, uh, Grand Genimo. I couldn't find a pronunciation for this fucker. Uh, Grunge, Grunge in a mo. I don't know. It's tough word. Uh, Grunge, Grunge in a mo.

It's no disrespect. I just, I don't know. It's tricky. Uh, named for the, he used to visit the island of Ronoque with this guy. This is the, this is the chief, uh, this is the tribal king of Ronoque, uh, which was named, of course was named of course for the tribe of Americans called Ronok, living there. And he writes, and the evening following, we came to an island which they call Ronok, distance from the harbor by which we entered seven leagues, and at the north end thereof was a village of nine houses, built of cedar, and fortified round about with sharp trees to keep out their enemies. And the entrance into it made like a turnpike very artificially.

When we came towards it, standing near onto the waterside, the wife of Genghenimo, the King's brother came running out to meet us very cheerfully and friendly. Her husband was not then in the village, some of her people she commanded to draw boats onto the shore for the beating of the billow. I don't know, others she appointed to carry us on the backs to the dry ground. Alright, little fucking piggyback ride up to the beach. That's service. And others to bring our oars into the house of a foe of stealing when we came into the

utter room, five in five rooms in the house she caused us to sit down by a great fire. And after took off our clothes and washed them and dried them again, some of the women plucked off our stockings and washed them, some washed our feet in warm water. And she herself took great pains to see all things ordered in the best manner she could, making great haste to dress some meat for us to eat. After we had dust dried ourselves, she brought us into the inner room where she sat on the board standing along the house some wheat. Sudden venison, roasted fish, sodden, boiled in roasted melons, raw,

and soden, roots of divers, kinds and divers, fruits. That's where the guys, what do you write? Roots of divers, kinds and divers, fruits, their drink is commonly water. But while the grape blaster, they drink as wine. And for they want of cast to keep it, yet, all the year after they drink water,

oh, because they can't throw the wine. But it is sardine with ginger in it and black cinnamon and sometimes sassafras and divers other wholesome and medicinal herbs and trees. But some tree in it apparently. We entertain with all love and kindness and with much bounty, after their manner as they could possibly be devised, we found the people most gentle, loving and faithful, void of all gaiolin trees and such live as the man of the golden age. Man, again, start it off so well.

Chief Grangemo, quite the host. As wife quite the hostess, may just whining and dining as explorers, they're just fucking peaceful, no gail, gentle and loving, washing their clothes, getting them piggyback rides on the beach. Probably just high five in each other. So much fun. Man, it started off so well.

Then after taking more time to survey the land around Rono can learn more about the tribe living there, expedition leaders Arthur Barlow and Philip Amados convinced two local chiefs, Montillo, and want cheese to accompany them back to London where they will report to Sir Walter Olly and tell him about how suitable they think the land they have found is for colonization.

By this, it's just an exploratory trip. They leave two unnamed crew members behind with the tribes as insurance for taking two of their men and somehow convey that to the tribes that they will bring them back. I don't know how you do that. How do you communicate to a new civilization where no one on earth who speaks your language also speaks their language? Hard to even get my head around that. November of 1584, Raleigh's crew minus the two they left behind, make it back to London and report to Raleigh. A crew member, Thomas Harriet, noted English

mathematician, astronomer, and translator. He'd been learning the Algonquin language from Manteo and chief Wanchis on the return voyage and regaled rale with tales of a great city called ski ski coke And reports of vast amounts of golden silver inland from ronok both chief Monmentio and chief wanties were housed at rolleys london resins Durham house Manteo defended his befriended his house and learn English while wanties became more and more suspicious of his house And soon considered himself a captive of the English. By Christmas of 1584, Harriet had become virtually fluent in Algonquin and gathered tons of

intelligence for the next journey. Raleigh's impressed with the information Harry provides and believes there is a great deal of money to be made, a great deal of fortune to be made in Ronoke and in the inland areas beyond Ronoke. So with the Queen's permission, he charters to be made in Ronoke and in the inland areas beyond Ronoke. So with the Queen's permission, he charters a return voyage to Ronoke in the hopes of making a fortune and expanding the Queen's empire

and riches through colonization. And speaking of the Queen, I would like to take a moment to talk about today's sponsor. Today's time suck is brought to you by Queen Lizzie's suckle shack. You ever notice how happy a baby is when his suckling milk of one of Mama's sweet teats? The happiest it could possibly be.

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please go to Queen LizzySuckles Check. Dot warm milk slash time suck sucks teats for 20% off your first nipple. And I'm done. Who's still listening? Half-mountance? 10%. Should I tell Jill Paisley and Lindsay that the run is over? They define new jobs? Okay, that was fun for me at least. Now, back to England in the 1580s. Sir Walter Raleigh, advancing Queen Elizabeth, has nothing to do, she had nothing to do with a suckle shack to allow him to attempt to colonize present day North Carolina. Why would she even want to do that? Well, she wanted to because England was in a tough spot in the 1580s. Spain was making a fortune with gold being plundered from South and Central America. We learned all about that in the Aztec Suck. France was also

powerful and getting more powerful with early colonial efforts. Irish rebellions against British rule were becoming more and more frequent and costly to suppress. In Scotland, pro-English regent, James Douglas had recently been overthrown. And Queen Elizabeth worried about young Scottish King James VI, who would become future King James I of England, worried about him falling under Catholic influence and breaking away from England. So you know, it feels like things are falling apart, it feels like she'd been threatened from all sides in order to keep England from being swallowed up by a rival colonial power or from within. In order to keep hold of her kingdom, she's got to do something and

colonizing what is now the United States was that something she decided to do. So in December of 1584, Queen Elizabeth approves Farahali to establish a large harbor on Rhoneau Island, from which English privateers could harass Spanish shipping in the Caribbean and Western Atlantic. Establish a long term English presence in the new world that wouldn't time fatally undermine Spain's empire. I do love how pirating rival country ships was part of colonial power strategy. Which is a good strategy.

Like, we learned that way back in suck 28, the Blackbeard suck, that a lot of these privateers would actually then eventually transition into becoming full on pirates, you know, realizing why am I risking my life stealing gold from Spanish ships and then give it to the queen when I can just keep it myself. Yeah, I'm the one taking it. But I love how like these pirates, many of them were just created in these political situations. Where you know, how do we keep Spain from getting more powerful? Well, we get this a little island over here.

We have a little harbor built and we have some guys hanging out with ships over there. And then when the Spanish and the shipping routes, you know, they just sneak over and just fuck their ships up, take all their stuff and bring it to us instead. Let them do all the work, go down and you know, get it, actually, you know, the mines or somebody they're going to do all the work. But then let the Spanish bring it back until they get it almost here around the Canary Islands or somewhere, then we just pop it and take it.

January 6, 1585, Queen Elizabeth, as I mentioned earlier, Knights William Raleigh, names him Duke of Virginia. They're calling Rowanoke Virginia at this point, although it will actually become part of North Carolina. Their name Virginia, by the way, is taken from Queen Elizabeth, being known as the Virgin Queen. Virginia coming, of course, from the word Virgin. And I do think that's

a lot better choice than the other name they were considering for Virginia, which was desert pussy, as in vagina, as in vagina that rarely receives any moisture. Sorry, not sorry. When the term desert pussy popped into my sometimes stuck in junior high brain, I just felt compelled to share it with you. So Sir Raleigh begins to prepare his men to establish Roanoke. Queen Elizabeth donates one of her ships, Tiger for the journey. Raleigh buys four ships and has two pinnests or small boats made.

Pinnest was a good for going from the place where you would anchor your larger vessel to the shore. It could be their sail to road. Raleigh wanted to lead the party himself, but his request was denied by Elizabeth. She wanted to keep her young man meat close. It'd keep us lips on our sweetheats. No selling for you waltz, suck a little mama sweetheats. I don't want you.

Come on, don't be a bratwalt. Put my nibble in your mouth. I don't like being caught waltz, I'm a grown man, you're not my mother. You're just tired, waltz. You're just tired, Wall. You're just tired, you just did an app. You'll get one. Just drink, Mom, I was milked first. Ah, I don't know what's wrong with me today.

Unable to go himself, Raleigh chooses Sir Richard Grenville, 42 year old, highly decorated sea captain, veteran of numerous naval battles to lead the colonization voyage. The first colonization expedition, the previous trip being just exploratory, was composed of five ships and two penises and would consist of 600 men. That's such a weird word, penises by the way. Sounds almost like penises. It took five ships and two wings. No, two penises. It was led by Granville along with Colonel Ralph Lane in Philip Amades, who was chosen as Admiral of Virginia and put in charge of defense. Arthur Barlow also returns, Simon Fernandez, once again chief pilot John White, Thomas Harriet, chosen to survey the land

they're back. They were meant to be aided by Chief Mantio, Chief Wanchise. No women and families allowed in this mission, one Anglican minister sent along to spread Christianity to the natives. Raleigh's strategy was to send Grenville with the first wave of colonist Taronoke Island to establish a beachhead, shortly after Bernard Drake and Amaya's Preston, two experienced mariners were to follow with a second group of about 200 men to strengthen their position. Right, so that's the plan.

You send this first wave over first, and a couple months later, then you send this second wave to strengthen the position. And then further supplies and sellers are sent over in more and more waves as the colony grows. That's the plan. You're going to see how that doesn't work out. In the meantime, Granville was to conduct a reconnaissance of the outer banks, establish initial settlements, and then depend on circumstance, either stay with the colony or zip back to England. And how exciting would it be, by the way, to be in charge

of colonizing something? I mean, seriously, you get to build a new civilization and land your people of barely or never even been, that to me more exciting than just exploration. Like, I feel like we're hardwired to want to create and then take pride in our creations. Like, when I make an album or even when I create an episode of this podcast, I think, that's cool man, I made that. I created that.

It feels good. And it feels even better at least to me when you sound to it with your hands as tangible. Like a couple of years ago, I made my kids a tree for it, big one, when I was done, when you sound to it with your hands, it's tangible. Like a couple of years ago, my kids at Tree Fort, big one, when I was done, I just felt an enormous sense of pride. You know, like more than with the album, the Tree Fort is tangible.

I could touch it, walk around on it, sit on the deck, I made it, sit under its roof, be protective from the elements, I built that. I can only imagine what it would be like to fund an expedition to a new territory, fund the building of like a whole new town and a whole new land. How cool for the initial settlers as well.

Like you show up, there's just woods. No one speaks your language, there's even anyone else around at all. Then you just start cutting down trees, building homes with your hands, rudimentary tools, stores, forts, a church, have roads built, fields, plowed crops, planted, harbor built. How incredible if you're the one who chartered the colony also to then come over and just see this brand new shiny town in the woods. Not that any of that would be the fate of Roanoke. On April 9th, 1585, the group sets sail from England

and the seas are rough almost immediately and they lose one pinnest in the first week and then all the other ships are scattered in the storm and lose sight of each other. All of this, bad omen, bad sign of things to come. This trip is fittingly starting off the opposite of that peaceful initial exploratory trip. It's stormy and terrible and things are only going to get worse. Grenville arrived in the lead ship, Tiger and Puerto Rico on May 11th.

The ship Elizabeth made it on May 19th. Grenville decided to continue on without the other ships. He captured a spall, spanish trade ship, and route, which he plundered and then took to his fleet. On June 29th, 1585, they reached the outer banks, but Tiger ends up getting caught on a sandbank. Stuck for over two hours, this trip is cursed. The ship sustains major damage.

Much of the food stores they needed to live on a ruined. On July 11th, 1585, Grenville makes it to Ronog Island and is delighted to discover that two of the food stores they needed to live on a ruined. On July 11th, 1585, Grenville makes it to Rono, Island and is delighted to discover the two of the ships in his fleet. He was parted from in the stormy seas. They began their journey. Robuck and Dorothy had beat him there. And then they all spent a week exploring the area and visiting various Sekaton or Sekitan.

Sekotan, I couldn't find a pronunciation for that. Sorry. I looked, I looked, Sukotan, probably secotin. Various secotin settlements, the secotins were a group of American Indians whose tribes included Rhonoke. On July 21st, chief, chief, grand jameo,

Rhonoke gave Grenville permission to make his settlement on the north end of Rhonoke Island. Things looking up at the moment. And then over the next few weeks, you know, they built a small fort, there was about 120 by 100 yards, large enough to accommodate the 160 man of the tiger. That seems tiny to me.

Well, I guess yards, but man, 160 dude, sleeping in a little fort, I just can't picture how they would do it. Okay, I can all cramped and tiny their sleeping quarters must have been. You know, they weren't sleeping on memory phone, that's for sure, they weren't sleeping on fucking Lisa mattresses. No mattresses,, they weren't sleeping on memory phone, that's for sure, they weren't sleeping on fucking Lisa mattresses.

No mattresses, I imagine they just slept on the floor, maybe on a mat of some kind of best, some humid room, no bug screen, how did they do it? How did they live back then? While they were busy building a settlement, Grenville dispatched men in the surrounding area to look for gold and silver. So far, he had been very disappointed

with the lack of apparent wealth of the natives. Then on August 25th, Granville has planned departs for England on the repaired tiger. He leaves 100 men to work the settlement. He assumed the second wave was still on their way, but unfortunately Queen Elizabeth had repurposed those men to fight the Spanish. Now this is the bummer. This is when shit really starts to go south for those early colonists. Yet another example of the problems with old time communication. How much does suck for the first wave of dudes?

They've prepared for months, they've signed on to a plan that included a second wave of reinforcements to help them fortify their position, bring more food, help farm the new land, help prepare for winter, help them defend themselves from potential hostile armies if need be, and then after they're already over there, after they've done their part of the mission, they get abandoned half a world away. What if we did that with some Mars colonization mission? You know, I just send a first wave of people to Mars with understanding that, you know, second wave's coming

to help finish building the space base. You need to live more food so you don't die. And then after they're already working on Mars, you know, they just get a message like, hey, sorry everybody, I know this is disappointing for you, but look, you're probably gonna die up there now because we had some shit come up It was more important for us to deal with back home and we're not we're not gonna send any more people so best luck Tutorial

Colonel Ralph Lane was left in charge of the settlement Initially Lane was loving it before he found out the reinforcements weren't coming initially written back to England about how amazing This new territory was stating that For in common initially written back to England about how amazing this new territory was state-in-it Rono island was most pleasing territory of the world for the soil is of a huge unknown greatness and very well people And the climate so wholesome that we have not had one sick since we touched land here To conclude if Virginia had but horse and kind and some reasonable proportion I dare show myself being inhabited with English no no wellmen, Christiandom were comparable to it. I think that was way of his way of saying this is pretty cool.

On the way back to England, Grandville attacked and looted his Spanish ship and plundered 40,000 Spanish duckets and about 80,000 duckets worth of ivory ginger. Some other stuff, the English took this is a good omen for building these American colonies. The Tiger lands back in England and John White immediately finds Raleigh to report back on everything by early November 1585, Lane and the men on Rone Oak. Now they realize the second wave of people are just not coming. At least not when they were supposed to, not cool. His men grow restless and irritable, so Lane organizes an expedition up to Chesapeake Bay.

They also plan this expedition because, well, relations with the locals to Cotens rapidly deteriorating Mostly because the English had brought with them a lot of diseases like smallpox and influenza that the Indians had no natural immunity For and these viruses are just wreaking havoc. They're sweeping through villages killing lots of people Just whoops are out there, but we did not oh man We did not plan on this. We didn't expect this. I know you're upset that a lot of your people are dead. And I listen, I get it, but you have to understand it.

We don't know much about medicine. We could not have predicted this. I would take it back if I could. I would go back and cough into the crooked my elbow and not directly into your faces if I could. Some second-tone elders start thinking that the English are actually dead men who'd returned to the world and were immortal.

They prophesied that more English were coming to kill them and take their places, which actually is pretty accurate. Others believed the trail of death left by the colonists was not caused by disease, but by invisible bullets. You and your tricky invisible bullets. They thought the invisible bullets were being fired by soldiers for many miles away to punish the local tribes for somehow insulting them.

This decoding chief decides the English are dangerous. He makes it clear he wants them to get the fuck out. You take your invisible bullets and you go and get out here. Go on, get. And then the American Indian host, you know, started attacking them. And they were also attacked by some of the colonists. So over here, I'm sure a lot of nonsense

and miscommunications. There's also a lot of different tribes. And some of the tribes, not friendly with one another. So it's just starts getting a little rough. Start running into more hostile kind of situations. The honeymoon is over. On June 8th, the 1586, the fleet of ships, led by Sir Francis Drake makes it to Ron Oak.

Drake had been dispatched to fight the Spanish near Florida, but wasn't doing well. And after reporting back to the Queen, he was ordered to send reinforcements to Raleigh's colony. So they didn't get that, you know, that one group coming back over to reinforce him. But now now Drake shows up. So he gets something. But it's not good.

He has three large ships, offers any assistance lane needs, but just as they've been, start making their preparations or hurricanes, strikes and damages the boats. Just shit. Nothing's going well. Juneteenth Drake fits the colonists on his ships. They all set sail back to England. He doesn't have enough provisions after that storm to allow them to stay there.

So they all sail back other than a small garrison of like 15 unlucky bastards who stay back in the Fort Granville of Belts. And so just a year after landing, they take off the head back during that first year, there was no discovery of wells, very little progress and developing a harbor for Queen Elizabeth, the launch attacks that first year. There was no discovery of wealth, very little progress in developing a harbor for Queen Elizabeth's launch attacks against the Spanish.

This colonization effort so far, just pretty much a total failure. Raleigh's pissed when he finds out Drake was supposed to reinforce the colony, not evacuate it. He'd send a supply ship in July. He did send one, he just sent it way late that landed after Drake had left. How much is that suck?

So everybody takes off and then the supply ship's like, hey guys, we're here! Oh, hey, where's everybody? Yeah, Granville arrives less than a month later with six ships carrying 200 new colonists, Baffle defined no sign of Lane's Metters supply ship, which had returned to England. So then he just brings everybody back.

The whole experiment, just one disaster after another now. Lane explains to Raleigh that the river system in the harbor ill-suited to large ships, natives are now enemies. There was not any treasure to be found, nothing but bad news. It tries to convince Raleigh that they needed to move where they wanted to build a colony. But while Lane is telling Raleigh about how unchidable Rowanoke is for colonization Thomas Harriet, it's trying to convince Raleigh of the exact opposite that there's plenty of

valuable resources in Rowanoke Island and it should be where they had back to. He said the English had found silk grass, like that grown in Persia, which could be cultivated to great profit because of the demand in England and abroad. They discovered silkworms, the largest walnuts, introduced mulberry trees. They would be able to develop a trade as great that prompted by the Persians turks, same-panished and Italians. There were all kinds of trees that could be used to produce pitch tar, turpentine, cedar for furniture, other timber products, sugar cane, you know,

all kinds of stuff. And in the spring of 1586, Raleigh decides that he will attempt a colony one more time, but he's not going to do it in Rono. He's going to set his harbor at Chesapeake Bay. He decides that that first colony failed, do not only to location, but also to the caliber of the colonists, Lane described as soldiers, he'd command his wild men unruly and difficult to control, just riff-raff. That's why the first colony didn't take fucking riff-raff. Can't start a colony with riff-raff. Listen, you can't start off with a trailer park.

I mean, sure, a trailer park is going to eventually show up, but you don't lead with it. You start with the cream of the crop. Harriet criticized them for being too aggressive and quick to resort to violence. He said his men killed the local people. He wrote, you know, basically over some bullshit. Many of the men had been unsued to the hardships of life in a fledgling colony. So Raleigh, therefore, decided that the new colony would be a civilian settlement rather than another military garrison, made up of men and women committed to the venture who had an interest, vested interest in its outcome.

To encourage settlers to join the enterprise, for this next attempt, he grants each individual 500 acres and families proportionally more a huge amount of land by the standards of the day. It was then up to White and Grandville to recruit new sellers and recruit they did. They recruited a group of young ambitious families looking for opportunities they'd never find in England because they didn't have the money or the right family name to climb the social ladder there. It was a young group with white and Fernandez in their 40s, everyone else in their mid-20s to early 30s. White's daughter Elizabeth there, mother of the yet to be born for junior dare, and her

husband Anna Nias agreed to relocate to the colony. Raleigh gave three ships for the crossing the line, 120 tons, which would carry white, front and is about 50 settlers, an unnamed fly boat, about 100 tons commanded by Edward Spicer, who carried 50 settlers in their cargo, and a little 30 ton of pennies commanded by Captain Edward Stafford, who a bit of a member of Lane's colony, and this ship had room for about 20 more settlers. All in all, three ships, 150 people. The plan was for the group to stop on Ronok Island

for white to return to natives to Waii and Mantio. Mantio had returned for a second trip to England to their people. And then the colonists were to move on to Chesapeake Bay, find a site for the main colony and begin settling, building their settlement. At that point, Fernandez and Spicer would go back to England to inform Raleigh of the colony's safe arrival,

leaving the penance behind for settlers use. White probably anticipated to England to inform Molly of the colony's safe arrival, leaving the penis behind for settler's use. White probably anticipated that Raleigh had heard the colony had been established. He would fit out another expedition to reinforce the colony as soon as possible. And then in April of 1587, the expedition is ready to set sail. And then it's the last minute two dozen settlers back out, making the best choice of their lives. Then on May 8th, 1587, the fleet anchors in Plymouth and will head to Virginia in a few days. And then on June 22nd 1887 the fleet lands in the St. Croix Islands will rest there for a few days

and they have a disaster there. Eager for fresh fruit, they find some small fruits look like green apples but they turn out to be poisonous and they burn their mouths actually quote, burn their mouths and tongue so badly they could not speak. Many of the settlers also became sick from drinking contaminated water from a stagnant pond near the temporary shelters they constructed to an after landing. Even washing themselves in the water caused their face to burn and swell, so that they were unable to see for nearly a week. Jesus! Oh, it's for this trip even worse than last trip.

Think about that. Everything goes smoothly on the exploratory trip. Right, weather plenty of food friendly indigenous people showering them with gifts Then on the second trip massive storm at the start of the voyage scatters the ships then supplies your damage and loss Then the friendly natives turn on them or probably more actually now they do much a shit to the locals to make the locals Hey, them and one to get out and they have to sail back and now they're starting off their trip getting sick from eating poison apples, drinking some new beverage from the people behind McGill's pop, some new melt and swell your face or burn your eyes out water.

They should have probably turned around at this point. On July 22nd, 1587, white and his men land on Rono, Gailand. At the place, possibly near Shalobag Bay, where the small garrison of 15 men had been left a year earlier, and there was no one there. Only the bleached bones of one of the men who white supposed to be killed by the Indians long before.

This is a really bad sign, not good to just find the bones of the men who left behind in the fort, or that you left behind in the fort when you show up to start the colony. On July 25th, the fly boat arrives with 118 sellers. Only two had deserted the mission in Puerto Rico shortly after that whole poison apple firewater debacle They spent the next few weeks building houses The plan was to build a temporary settlement and then to make it to Chesapeake Bay by the next spring at the latest Then on July 28th more really bad news a

Settler named George Howe Went to a creek near the settlement stripped off all his clothes to catch some crabs, do some crabbing, but hidden in the trees nearby was a group of the code and warriors. They were still angry after the epidemic spread from the last failed colony. They still mad about those invisible bullets and they shoot howe with 16 arrows

and then beat him with clubs until he was just a bloody pulp. I'll teach him, I'll teach him to shoot those invisible bullets. White and the other sellers are shocked. White was not prepared for how much the relationships had deteriorated. He wanted to find out who had killed a house so he could send Captain Edward Stafford along with Manteo

to visit the Croatone to see if they could discover what happened. Well, the Croatones explained with Stafford and Manteo that what had happened with the last colony, you know, how bad relationships had gotten about all the disease and the dying and fighting. They explained also that the missing garrison of those 15 men were attacked by secotans last year from nearby Algonquin village of Dastamongpuk. And then Lane and his men had also killed members of the Crotone tribe, Stafford and Manteo

tell the chief and elders, they want to fix the past wrongs and they want to just start a new relationship. So Stafford informs the elders that elders, they want to fix the past wrongs and they want to just start a new relationship. So Stafford informs the elders that if the Dakotans would accept the seller's friendship, they would in turn willingly receive them again, like all is forgiven. And he gives them a week to decide if they want to do that. Have a truce and start over and have peace. Give them a week to send over the message saying, yep, we agree, peace is good, we're starting over.

Well, the week passes with no words from the chiefs on the mainland or the Kroetown about a meeting. So white concludes reluctantly that there's no other option than to launch a raid and attack that das among Puk village. So on August 9th, white staffer, Menteo, and two dozen men cross over to the mainland in the middle of the night. They launched their attack against group of men

who were sitting around a fire. They were determined to revenge their evil doings towards us, but white made a big mistake. They had not attacked us to Coden, but rather they attacked the friendly Crot Owen. Whoops, wrong tribe. They actually attacked Mantio's tribe instead. Wrong American in his Mantio, understandably,

pretty upset that they were attacking his own people. But he somehow gets over it and ultimately decides with white, but man, what the fuck? How did he not know that he was attacking his own people? This is a problem with nighttime attacks in the days before night vision goggles or even flashlights. Really hard to figure out who the hell you were attacking. Big whoops here.

Huge whoops. Now you have another tribe very, very upset with you and rightfully so. Well, August 13th, 1587, white holds a ceremony where Manteo was Christian and given the title of Lord of Ronoke and uh, and uh, Dassamong Puke by a writer of Raleigh's claim to Virginia and Queen Elizabeth's Authority. You know, this uh, this fitting with the plan that white and settlers would continue on to Chesapeake and Manteo and his people would hold down Ronoke Island. Manteo's first native to be accepted into the Church of England on American soil. Uh, I feel like this is probably a little bit of an apology as well. Just, hey buddy, sorry about the not planning that

attack for a well, which you know, the one that ended up killing lighter people. Extra sorry for bringing you along for the attack where you actually ended up killing a lot of your, uh, lighter people. Super sorry. Hey, how about we make it up to you? Uh, how about we make you one of our chiefs, make you Lord and we'll give you take it to heaven too. Oh, it's good It's actually not good. All better August 18th 1587 Elizabeth there white's daughter gives birth to Virginia there at first Christian first English settler born and what will be Counting United States. She's Christianed on August 24th

By the end of August the big ship to Lion preparing to return to England for the winter one colonist was supposed to return with Fernandez to give updates to Raleigh. The main update being like, hey, we didn't have time to plant crops and we're going to start to death unless you bring back some supply soon. The response is sent back Christopher Cooper, but the settlers came to white. John White is a collective and implored that he be the one to go as he had the best relationship with Raleigh and we have the best odds of getting him to quickly send more supplies back. And so in August 26, White makes the decision that he would be the one to return to England.

He selects Roger Bailey and Anias Dare to take charge of the settlers while he was away and to continue to prepare them for the move up to Chesapeake Bay. White and the settlers agreed that most of the settlers would move into the mainland for winter. They would only leave a small contingent on Mono Islands so that they would receive supplies from the West Indies to help white locate the rest of the settlement when he returned in the spring. Finally, white and his assistance make arrangements in case of emergency. The sellers had to leave the island or they're in the settlement in a hurry. They would carve the name of where they were going to in a prominent tree or someplace that was easy to find.

A cross over the letters would signify that they had been attacked and forced to depart. So interesting, a little note here considering what we know about people finding that carved Croatone later. On August, Carved Word, Croatone later. On August 27, White Sales, Sales for England was Fernandez and the crew of the line and Captain Spicer and the fly boat leaving his daughter and new granddaughter behind. When they reached the West Indies, Fernandez and the line stayed to troll the water for prizes. Spicer and White made way for England immediately in the fly boat and then they had terrible weather during the journey.

Didn't not reach Ireland until October 16th and by that time they were completely out of supplies. Five sailors out of their 15-person crew had died. Spicer, too sick to carry on, stays in Ireland to recover while white takes passage aboard a ship headed to South Hampton called the monkey on November 1st So again after that first amazing exploratory visit almost nothing is going right with these expeditions now White makes it to London on November 8th He learns that the line had already docked weeks before Fernandez had failed to capture any prizes. Why would then have to wait over a week to see Ralebi?

Because the shit storm, he and the settlers he'd convinced to head to Roanoke was continually worsting. He had landed and landed in a terrible time. England was preparing for an invasion. Spain was preparing for an attack. In early October, therefore, the Privy Council, Queen Elizabeth's body of advisors had ordered a general stay of English shipping, which prohibited all ships from leaving port without permission because they might be needed to defend England's shore.

So fuck! Raleigh had been appointed by Queen Elizabeth to be on her council of war, and he had bigger fish to fry than his colonial experiment. On November 20th, nearly three months after leaving Roanoke, White and Raleigh meet and Raleigh tells White that he will send out a relief boat. Don't worry, I'm sending out a relief boat with provisions and men just as soon as I can. It should happen real soon. You know, he's already talked to Captain Edward Stafford, board the line. You know, already talked to Grandville, telling him to start preparing his men, both of us leave.

We're going to get you. And White is initially relieved, but then his anxiety worsens greatly when months go by without another word from Raleigh on when this is going to happen. How terrible does white feel now? How frustrated and helpless is his daughter and granddaughter are across the Atlantic surrounded by indigenous people they have pissed off. You know, people that Collins have already battled,

he knows there's a good chance, you know, that this greatly outnumbered little colony could be under attack or have been attacked already by now. They could be starving. You know, they got there too late to plant crops to winter and that's not a damn thing you can do about it. You know, all his pleas are falling on deaf ears. There's just other shit going on, that's not allowing a boat to go back and help these

people. Finally, in March of 1588, Grenville and his fleet do prepare to depart. Just, you know, yay, supplies, finally gonna arrive in Roanoke, few months late, but hey, hopefully not too late. Hopefully peace with local tribes have been attained. You know, maybe they're all the best friends again. It's woohoo. But then Grenville has given notice

from the Privy Council to cancel the trip. Damn it. Grenville told that all of the ships would need to be sent to Plymouth to join Sir Francis Drake, where they would become part of the Queen Navy's, the Queen's Navy in the preparations for this big battle coming up against the Spanish Armada. So damn it. Still no supplies come and the Rono colony has been abandoned for the moment.

April 22nd, 1588, Raleigh able to retain two small ships to send a Ronoque, the brave 30 tons captain by Arthur Facy and the row a 25 ton penis, not required by Drake. 15 settlers are aboard. Seven women, four men, four children, as well as supplies. And then this ship leaves on April, on April 22nd, excuse me, 1588, yeah, to go to row no. So, you know, rescue mission back on, yay, awesome, unfortunately, Facy actually showed no real interest in making it to the colony.

Instead, he went out of his way to attack and plunder any ship that he came across on the sea. His rampage ended only when the brave was attacked by a well-armed privateers out of Lever Shell. The larger of the two French ships carried a hundred men and ten cannon and was faster than the English vessel. Facy had little choice but to surrender or fight. He chose to fight and signal his intention by sending a volley of shot into the French ship

at close range. The attack set off a fierce battle lasted for now and a half during which 23 men on both sides were killed or wounded. And then once the English lost the fight, the French plundered the ship, took everything that he could carry, face he ordered to abandon the journey and return to England.

So rescue attempt over. So that sucks. You know, he gets everything together, they do headouts. And then we know when the captain of the ship he's on wants to make a little extra money at backfires and gets his ass kicked and then the attempt is over. And also John White wounded, he taking two wounds and all that wound to the head and a bullet to the thigh. So now they arrive back in England on May 22nd. White realizes he would not make it back to Virginia at all in 1588.

Oh man. Elsewhere in 1588, July 29th, 1588, King Phillips, Armada, Seen off the coast of Cornwall, August 18th, the entire English Navy meets the famous Spanish Armada engagement battle. August 18th, the seemingly invincible Spanish Armada has been defeated.

Great news for England, and finally, maybe some good news for white, right? It's been 18 months since white and left Ronoke. No ship had made it to the colonists for Mignol's provisions, but now the spanish armadot has been defeated surely they could send ships of provisions for on oak now right now wrong by january of 1589 rolly was losing interest in his new american colony he was preoccupied with settling forty two thousand acres in irlanda he was awarded in 1587 uh... he's also being

replaced as the object of Queen Elizabeth's affection by the dashing 23-year-old Robert Devaro, second-year-old of Essex. On December of 1588, Raleigh challenges Devaro to a duel, but the damn privy council intervenes and prevents it from taking place. Fucking duels, man. What is it with duels lately? Really starting to understand the dueling tradition behind old suck-subject dog holidays life, right? He was born into it. It's a wild Johnny ringo. You look like someone just walked over your grave. Wow.

Robert Devaro. You look like someone trying to steal my sweet desert. Hey, Luciferina. March of 1589, white who has to has to want to do. Raleigh himself at this point for banning his daughter and granddaughter does manage to pull together enough support finally for a voyage over to the colony trying again Raleigh actually has the nerve to be but hurt that white found another backers But he also doesn't want to invest his own money into backing the mission

He drafts a formal agreement in which Raleigh granted exclusive trading privileges with the city of Raleigh To a syndicate of 19 London merchants and supporters who had joined which on white To assistance England and seven surviving assistants in Virginia. And they had to kind of get his permission because remember, he still has that like seven year hold. He's still in that window of having that seven year hold on colonizing this area. Then in mid-April of 1589, a massive fleet of merchant ships sets out for Rona, but it is yet again a complete failure.

The trip has been poorly organized and the ships just don't make it and have to go back. White has to be feeling nearly completely insane with frustration and worry at this point. He has been trying to get back to Ron Oak from almost two years and just his efforts are continually thwarted. He has to be worried sick. On February 1, 1590, White is finally able to get passage on a boat headed to the West Indies. He persuades a group of privateers to bring him to ronoke he thinks but he has been fucked yet again it is unreal how unlucky these bastards were uh... the group that told him they were going to take in ronoke actually had no intention of actually heading there least not right away uh... they just told everyone that's where they were

heading because the privy council still had a ban on various destinations and telling them they were going to ronoke was about the only way they could get out and get out to see. So they used John, they were actually just privateers interested in treasure and Roanoke didn't have any they were looking for. So instead they went and plundered ships for months around the Canary Islands and the Azores. And then finally, after doing that for a while,

white convinced some of these privateers to sail for Roanoke. And then white finally lands on Roanoke, on August 18th, 1590. It's been three years since the colony was abandoned. The settlement he finds is deserted. The house is dismantled, the colony's gone. His first response, of course, utter dismay.

Yeah, utter dismay, Jesus, I can't say. He dreaded in the settlement abandoned But then he thinks you know what had forced these sellers to leave But as he looked around he finds a gradual sense of relief because there was no sign that the settlement had been attacked The palestade built by the sellers wasn't attacked He discovers the word, you know crow a toe and carved on one of the main gate posts without any cross or sign of distress That would have indicated the sellers had been in grave danger as they continued to look around the site. Cooksman, this is a cathandise with, found iron bars,

a couple of pieces of lead for fowlers, which is from his kin and sacershot, other heavy gear scattered about. It was almost overgrown with grass and weeds. Looks like it'd been abandoned a while back. But at least he is there. At least there's no sign that they've been attacked. Now, white can look around, trying to find his daughter and granddaughter, right? No, even more bad luck. A terrible storm strikes that night and damages their boats. So much bow damage, so many storms.

And then the crew is like, we can't stay here, sorry, and they have to head back for England the next day. And then white goes with them. How much does that suck? He was not able to make it to the Crotto and Village, where they had left sign that maybe they'd headed to check and see if that's actually where they went

to see if that's where his daughter, son-in-law, granddaughter, and those other colonists had relocated to. If he had just been able to stay a few more days, there might not be a mystery of Ronok. It might have been solved right away. Just dammit, Lucifina. Why so close? How low were his spirits on the journey back to England?

Can't even imagine. He arrives back in Plymouth in late October. He writes in a letter, my fifth and last voyage to Virginia, which is what they were calling the area around Rhinoke at that time, which was no less unfortunately ended than forward they begun. And as luckless to many as sinister unfortunate to myself

then that summer 1590 more bad news regarding more journeys to ronox her Walter Raleigh falls in love with Elizabeth best throch morton one of the queens uh maids of honor at Elizabeth's court disloyalty was not tolerated and in the queens view there could be no greater personal affront than a clandestine affair between one of her maids and one of her male favorites By the summer of 1591 best was pregnant and they could do they excuse me they could no longer hide the affair the Queen is pissed Places Sir Walter Rally under house arrest then puts both him and best in the Tower of London imprisoned and then they're released in 1592, but then Sir Walter is banned from the Queen's Presence. So now there is no hope that Raleigh is ever going to get permission to be granted another

charter, you know, be granted a more permission to arrange another fleet to ever set sail for Rhoanoke again. So now the colony that he had begun has been officially and totally abandoned pretty messed up, right? You know you don't abandon the lives of the people you're supposed to protect even chicken Joe knows that where's he been? Well, he just popped in the suck dungeon Baa ba ba ba ba ba ba ba They didn't ride leave your flocks to wolves like that Even the young man don't produce don't talk to that as it is like a man

He's a spiral wolf beef chicken, like dust under the mat. You find a new use for that thick boost? Maybe find a fetish console, turn that loose? Leave me in the street, fend for itself, it's number one way pimp ends up catching dust on a shell. Now, playboy, find a new chef, get a grip of cellos, make that trip world's hard, harder than me, harder than my smooth ass chicken name he can be.

C-5 for yo, it's always playboy, always forever. No time to slide on that, never. John Watch should have hit a back of his Strong hand in the week as land of Walters we guess face blah blah blah blah That was chicken Joe speak for how could Sir Walter Raleigh abandon his colonists even a pimp would never abandon the people He's made a deal with to protect and Chicken Joe thinks that John white should have pressed Walter harder to do right by his colonists I think it was a little more complicated than that for Raleigh And chicken Joe thinks that John White should have pressed Walter Harder to do right by his colonists.

I think it was a little more complicated than that for Raleigh. He had a lot going on. He had a lot of circumstances outside of control. But chicken Joe thinks what chicken Joe thinks. His pet chicken, looking extra sharp today by the way, never seen an actual chicken where platform high heels was goldfish in him before. Impressive. And now back to John White. Little is known of John White after he returned to England

after his final voyage to Ronoke. He allegedly never gave up hope that the colonists found a way to survive. I'm sure he didn't. And then he believed to have died in Plymouth, England around 1593. And then 17 years after Ronoke is abandoned in 1607, the English returned to what is now the United States.

The Virginia Company of London is established in 1606, and then three ships carrying 105 settlers are dispatched in December to found a colony on Chesapeake Bay. They create Jamestown, make in landfall in April 26, 1607, unlike Ronoak it lasts, and now let's hop out of this timeline to look and do what may have happened to the lost colonists of Roanoke. So what happened to those settlers? If you remember from the beginning, it would be over 100 years after the initial settlement attempt before more English pioneers would ever explore the island again.

By that time, any clues to disappearance, those initial settlers are gonna be really, really gone. So let's look into the leading possibilities for what happened to those colonists who we at least know, never established a British colony that lasted until the descendants of the original settlers eventually came into contact with future British colonists. We know that, we know they never built some proper little British town that lasted for any length of time because eventually someone would have obviously found that town or the

remnants of that town. We also know they never eventually found some miraculous way to get back across the Atlantic and make it back to England. There will be a record of that as well. So here's the first of a few possibilities of what might have happened to the lost colony. When considering causes for social and demographic calamities, traditionally, just historically, four general possibilities, war, famine, pestilence, and death. There's a good chance at all four of these combined to bring the Elizabethan Virginia

colonists, aka the Rhono colony, Tuneet. Fear of being discovered by the Spanish may have caused them to move further inland. John White suspected that it moved 50 miles further up into Maine had been intended. And it's not 50 miles from Maine, but that's what they thought was Maine. But the nearby mainland, American Indians were clearly hostile by 1587 towards the settlers. Remember that dude who went crabbing ended up eating over a dozen arrows instead of some scrumptious crab lakes. This local threat was another reason to leave Roanoke.

We know that laying soldiers in 1586 faced a serious food shortage and that white in 1587 returned to England because some supplies have been ruined to get them more food. The civilian colony had no real leverage to convince local tribes to share any of their winter reserves of food. Later famine would almost destroy Jamestown when American Indians there refused to sell food in the same situation could have taken down the Rhinox settlements and Jamestown disease even to plague itself would again and again start to strengthen the young colony.

Infectious diseases may have had similar and even more destructive impact to Ronoq. So disease famine could easily push the colonists outside their forts, ridden to war with local tribes, not happy with them. Another possibility is that they relocated to a new settlement and then died of what I just described in the first possibility. In 2012, first colony foundation, a group of historians and archaeologists researching Raleigh's American colonies asked the British Museum to examine paper patches on a map drawn by John White for Sir Walter Raleigh. Museum staff discovered beneath the symbol of a Renaissance fort.

And upon the patch surface, they noted the fate image of a little fortified town perhaps drawn an invisible ink The patch was located at the west end of the Albumaril sound about 50 miles from Ronoq Island And then remote sensing and fieldwork by FCF revealed no such fort in a five mile wide area in the location that the Discovered the that is supposedly invisible ink on the map in the location that they discovered that it's supposed to be visible ink on the map. But teams did on earth metal objects, tutor period, domestic pottery, and one spot adjacent to a contemporary Algonquin village. I think it may have been pronounced in Algonquin wrong earlier by the way. Damn it. Because of pottery, would not have been able to be carried by Lane Soldiers in 1586, first colony foundation researchers announced in 2015 that Site X was the probable location,

at least a few members of the last colony for a limited period time. So maybe some of them, you know, formed a new little settlement and then, you know, probably died there of the reasons I explained earlier. Another possible fate for the colonists was being killed by the Spanish. The Spanish did have a settlement just down the coast in Florida. It's certain that the Spanish and the West Indies were aware of the English colonist presence. One rowan oak settler named Darby Glond left the 1587 expedition once it set a short and portarico to take on supplies.

And then he later reported that he told Spanish officials the location of the Rohnoke settlement. So did the Spaniards find them and kill them? Maybe. Although no archeological evidence or historical record points to them doing this. There then of course is the possibility of the Rohnhoek recluse spider. Do you remember that? We talked about that a few steps ago.

If you recall, the Rohnhoek recluse was known to go for the eyes, ears, mouth, very aggressive spider. Now extend, because a bite in those areas would send the poison straight to your brain. And when one spider would bite you, it would release a chemical compound that would attract other spiders and they would do it like a swarm on you.

And you would end up just covered. Just think about that right now, just feel it. Feel so many spiders on your body. Hundreds, if not thousands of spiders. Crawling to your mouth, there's your screaming, they love to go straight for the eyes. One spider would often lift up your eyelid and then let other little spiders crawl under your eyeball.

Just feel that right now. Just imagine with your third eye, spiders crawl on your eyeball. God how terrible when I made up that story about a fake spider cone on those real colonists, you know? So since I made that story up, there's very little chance that that would solve the mystery. Back to reality, in the opinion of John Hopkins,

University Anthropologist Lee Miller, the colonists wandered into a violent shift in the balance of power amongst some inland tribes. You know, Americans with whom the colonists were friendly lost their hold over the area. And then other Americans hostile to the settlers took control. The Theronaut colonists made the trip inland when this happened. The men would have likely been killed, the women in children captured as slaves. The colonists would have been traded along around the span of the US coast from present day Georgia to Virginia.

So really again, this goes back to that first explanation, just a variation there. Another theory, not very popular is they tried sailing home and then they drowned along the way. Highly doubtful. They weren't shipbuilders and they didn't have a ship built for taking a group that large across the Atlantic. No legit historian seemed to really believe in this possibility. I don't think they would do something that desperate because I think they would probably

be smarter enough to know that would be certain death. Popular theory that a lot of people who stories included do seem to believe in is assimilation and a variation of this is my favorite. As published in National Geographic in 2015, two independent teams found archaeological remains suggesting that at least some of the Rhonoconis might have survived and split into two groups, each of which assimilated itself into a different American Indian community. One team is excavating a site near Cape Creek on Hatteras Island, about 50 miles southeast

of the Rhonoc Island settlement, while the other is based on the mainland about 50 miles to the northwest of the Rhonoc site. Cape Creek located in an oak forest near Pamela Co. Sound was the site of a major Krotoan town center trading hub. In 1998, archaeologists from East Carolina, university stumbled upon a unique find from early British America, a 10-karat gold, signet ring and grave with a lion or horse believed to date to the 16th century. Now, later testing in 2017 did reveal the ring is actually copper not gold is originally believed but that doesn't seem to really change the significance

of the fine if anything copper rings more common for the class of settlers coming across the Atlantic in the in the late 16th century so gold or copper the rings discovery prompted later excavation to the site led by Mark Horton an archaeologist at Britain's Bristol University who has been directing volunteers with the Crotoan Archaeological Society and Annual Dig since 2009. Recently Horton's team found a small piece of slate. This seems to have been used as a writing tablet and part of a, and also found part of the hilt of an iron rippier,

a light sword similar to those used in England in the late 16th century, along with other artifacts of European and American Indian origin. The slate, smaller version of a similar one found at Jamestown, in the late 16th century, along with other artifacts of European and American Indian origin. The slate, smaller version of a similar one found at Jamestown, bears a small letter M, still barely visible in one corner. It was found alongside a lead pencil. In addition to these intriguing objects, the Cape Creek site yielded an iron bar and a large copper ingot.

Both found buried in layers of earth that appeared to date to the late 1500s. American Indians lacked such metallurgical technology so they are believed to have been a European and origin. Horton told NASA to do graphic that some of the artifacts, his team found her trade items, but it appears that others may have well belong to the Rhino colonists themselves. The evidence is that they assimilated with the American Indians, but kept their goods. Going further into the assimilation possibility is the most intriguing possibility to me about what happened. And this is the theory of the Lumby tribe of American Indians.

This theory is that over the course of generations, intermarriage between the natives and the English survivors of Rhoneau produced a new culture, new tribe, the Lumby tribe. The Lumby tribe, native to North Carolina, yet no certain lineage can be pinned down. The tribe's oral history does link them to the Rhinox settlers, and this tradition is supported by some of their surnames and the tribe's ability to read and write English. Family names of some of the Rhinox colonists, like Dio, Hyatt, Taylor, were shared by Lumbi tribe members as early as 1719. The settlers who met them were astonished to find American Indians that had gray eyes

and spoke English. I found a graduate research paper conducted, I guess, completed by a student at UC Davis decided a lot of excellent books and governmental studies in the 1970s. Other sources that do make the case that the colonists, at least some of them, really did become absorbed by the Lumby tribe. This doesn't seem to be some wacky doodleness. To me, this one feels like best case possibility. Two cultures merging into one.

I hope that's what happened. I really do. There are other possibilities of what happened though, as well to the Rhono colonists. And if you want to find those, you got to dig into the idiots of the internet. It is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro that is the intro of anishing, posting simply people disappear every day. Yeah, true, Charlie, very true. Usually like one person now, at a time, usually not over 100 people all together,

and usually not 100 people who have moved to a very specific area for the very specific purpose of staying in that area and building a settlement in that area. It's not like they were all dropped off the mall and then just kind of wandered off to start new lives themselves, which would also be totally ridiculous. I wonder wonder I just wonder if this is how Charlie reacts to other extreme events, you know

Charlie, what do you think happened with 9-11 Buildings fall whatever it's normal buildings fall every day Yeah, buildings too fall, but not like that buddy. Not like that. I just love certain people's reactions The user Joe yes doesn't seem to understand the concept of context or of racism. Posting, yellow bunch of races talking about Indians had blue eyes, etc. And everyone says race doesn't matter. Obviously it does. It matters in regard to solving this mystery, Joey. If some American Indians had blue eyes when they met English settlers, years after O'Noke, it would imply there was a European genetics in their bloodline, which would mean that they'd encountered an inter-bred with Europeans, probably, at least possibly, the

Rhonoke settlers, since prior to Europeans, full-blooded American Indians did not have blue color eyes. Also, it's not racist to point out the genetic features of someone else, you know, or point out like their racial features. I've always found that argument so just illogical and dumb. And some people get so worked up about shit like this. Like, if you're a party and someone asks you to point out your friend Mike to them. And Mike is the one very white guy, very obviously white guy standing in a group of three dark skinned black guys,

four Asian guys and two dark skinned Latino guys. And they're all similarly dressed, similar ages, right? It's not racist to say, oh yeah, he's the, he's a white dude standing there. That's just the easiest way to discern him from the other people. That's the easiest way to identify him in a crowd. You're just letting your friend know, and his few words as possible, who Mike is. And his race is the most distinguishing feature in that particular setting. I think it's stupid in that situation when some people just get so fucking nervous like he's the guy with the jeans.

He's wearing the jean. No, not that guy. The guy with, he has the brown hair. No, no, not that guy. His hair is straighter than no, not that straight. He has the least 10 of the, get the fuck out. When people say, I don't see, like I don't see color, that phrase, they don't literally mean that, unless they're colorblind or an idiot. We all see color.

What color someone is just doesn't matter to some of us. User Wampus Dubb isn't happy with the quality of the documentary, it's pretty shady, it was. And post something that's not stupid, I just found it funny. He just posted a RIP history channel. Ah man, exactly, I'm gonna stop exactly. I wanna fucking happen to that channel.

It used to be good like a decade ago. Okay, one more video. There's a nice quick video summary of what may have happened to the last columnist on YouTube called Simply, The Rowan Oak Colony, posted by That Was History. Actually, it seems like a good channel for kids, no joke. Just some dude, I don't know, you look like he's maybe

senior in high school age, junior, maybe a little bit older, you know, late teens early 20s, and just when you don't kind of concisely broke it down, I thought very intelligently. The host presents the possibilities with just one over, and then asked listeners to put whatever they think happened to the colonists in the comment section and user storm clouds solves the case fucking sober archaeologist don't even worry about it anymore. We got it. We got it He posts guys. I figured it out. I saw some other videos on this subject and one said that Sir Walter Raleigh

Told the colonists to leave a mark on a tree where they want or no, excuse me to leave a mark on a tree where they went. Or no, excuse me, to leave a mark on a tree where they went. And if you go back to the beginning with the map, you look, sorry, it's written so horribly, it's hard to read. If you go back to the beginning with the map and look closely and pause the video, you can see the word crotone in the bottom left. Now, I'm not sure about the buildings, but I assume they took the buildings with them. Yeah, Mystery Salt, thanks for our archeologist, Selvin Comdou, Definitive, 100% for sure conclusions, but you fucking nailed it.

As if everyone else overlooked that, as if everyone else just didn't realize there was a map that one of the people there was holding with like an X, like a silly Scooby-Doo treasure map that would lead everybody to the answer for sure. Guys, guys, they wrote croat tone on a fence post and that is also on the map. Just follow the map to croat tone. It's so easy. Am I really that much smarter than everyone else?

No, no storm clouds, you're not. At least not in this example, you're really not. How funny would that be? If that really was the answer. And then somebody's like, oh fuck, we just got followed a little, like there was like the little dashes, like an old school treasure map. And then someone just finally followed it. And there was a whole town there of people still living in the 16th century.

Oh, gosh, shit. We forgot to, sorry, you guys. Sorry, I took us 400 years to find you. Everyone just forgot to follow the map. No one knew how to read a treasure map. User Madeline Gager is really not good at solving mysteries. She posts, my theory is that maybe the word Kroeto and mean something like help us. And maybe they were captured. And that word is what the last man wrote to show John White, where they were.

Are you fucking kidding me, Madeline? Are you related to Storm Cloud? How could you possibly think that everyone else has overlooked that? And how do you not understand that's the name of the nearby tribe? They said that in the video, you used to watch like 20 fucking times. Please do not ever get pregnant with Storm Cloud baby. Dear God, that kid would have zero chance in life. A little ways down the thread, Madeline, takes another stab at attempting to solve the mystery of the lost colony. And it's even worse than her first attempt. She writes,

another theory is maybe the Native Americans or something were trying to say that that is their land and they don't want any new people living there. Because maybe they thought they were going to come live with them and that they were trying to say that they don't need anymore people in the village. What are you even talking about, Madeline? What does any of what you just wrote have to do with them disappearing?

If they didn't want them to live in the village, they would just not let them live in the village. What does it have to do with the colonists leaving their own settlement? How are you able to work a phone or a computer, right, or like an iPad? How are you able to leave these comments? Where are your parents? Find them. Find them and tell them they need you to make you,

they need to make you study harder in school, okay? Focus more on what your teachers are telling you to do in school and less on dick around YouTube. Finally, Madeleine Gageer strikes again, posting something that makes even less sense than the previous two posts. I love this. She says,

or my other theory is maybe they were trying to spell in English, but they didn't know how to spell. So they got a letter's mixed up. The absurdity of this one makes me laugh so hard. I mean, I guess maybe there's a chance that Madeline is talking about the American Indians being the ones who wrote, The absurdity of this one makes me laugh so hard. I mean, I guess maybe there's a chance that Badalyn is talking about the American Indians being the ones

who wrote, you know, Krootow in there, but I like to think just based on her earlier post that she's actually talking about the colonists themselves here. You know, did she think that there's over a hundred sellers and yet none of them knew how to spell their own language. So they just started carving random letters in the wood. Like that's their signal. Well, I would anyone try and do that. You just, you would just draw a picture if you random letters in the wood. Like that's their signal. Well, I would anyone try and do that.

You just draw a picture if you didn't know the language. We need to tell them we're going, but we're all a literate. So what? Write some letters. You've seen them before? Carve them. People who are good at letters will figure it out. What letters?

Any of them. Just any of them. Just hope that our spells were hungry and we left to look for food. Okay, all right. okay, I got it. Hungry, hungry, um, see, see, left to look for food. Oh, yes, yes, I think our spells left to look for food. No, just draw some pictures.

Just draw a fucking picture. I want you to do that, Madeline. I want you to draw some pictures. At the moment, solving mystery just does not seem to be your thing. I do think that Madeline may just be a kid, by the way. I just thought it would be funny. I'm hoping she's not like 35 years old and in charge of something in a fucking business. She's like a VP, some important company.

Oh, God. And of course, there's still more possibilities than the stuff I went over. Last thing I'll mention about that is, in 1937, a California tourist walked into the history department of Emory, University, Atlanta, with a 21 pound engraved rock. He said he'd found in the swamp

while traveling through North Carolina. It immediately caught the eye of Haywood Pierce Jr. Emory Professor. And on one side, the engraving appears to be a grave marker reading, Ananias, Dare and Virginia, went hence onto heaven 1591. Anye, it's written really weird. And any, any Englishman, Shu, any, oh, any Englishman, show John White governor of Virginia is what it looks like it's trying to say on the other side The inscription was much longer and appeared to address white as father soon after you go for England. We came hither And then this is if I can such a weird version of English. I don't even know only misery

only only misery and War to ye. Yees salvages, fame spirits, angry, sudden murder, al-saive, seven, mind child, and anias to slain with much misery. So it seems to be an assigned EWD as in Eleanor white dare, John white's daughter. So who knows? You know, maybe, again, that that just can go back to the possibly earlier they get away for a little bit maybe started a new settlement but then were murdered

uh... or or maybe there's a demonic which looks like lady gaga that floated over with the columnist from europe is a stow way and brought a curse upon the columnist but a curse upon the land like in season six of american horror stories the butch i the butch i did it uh... what do i think i think the lumbia story makes me feel the best and it's the butchah did it. What do I think? I like the Lombi story. It makes me feel the best, and it's the only one that appears to have some real evidence behind it.

Nothing conclusive, but how else did that tribe acquire European features? How do their language, you know, feature elements of English? How do they know how to speak English? You know, before meeting other Europeans back in the early 1700s without having met the Rono Connus and you know how do they have their how how their eyes not brown. If in fact that is all true which it does appear to be. Last thing now before a top five take away is what happened to Sir Walter Raleigh, the man who abandoned the colony. Well upon his release from the Tower of London Raleigh hoped to recover his position with the Queen and in 1594 he was able to lead an unsuccessful expedition

to Guyana, now in a sway let's search for El Dorado, this fabled legendary city of gold. The expedition produced a little gold but subsequent forays, took these and the Azores reinstated him with the queen. So Walter Raleigh though wasn't well liked by her successors. We said King James I and Raleigh's enemies worked to taint his reputation with the new king and he was soon charged with treason and condemned to death. However, the sentence was commuted to imprisonment in the tower again in 1603, and he lived there with his wife and served it so weird.

So he was imprisoned in the tower, but he didn't get to leave, but he did get to live with his wife and had some servants, and he wrote the history of the world in 1614. Strange life this guy. He was released in 1616. So he spent fucking 13 years to search again for golden South America against the King's

approval. He invaded and pillaged Spanish territory and then was forced to return to England without any treasure was arrested on the orders of the King. His original descents were treason was reinstated and he was executed at Westminster in 1618 at the age of 65 and he never got to suckle upon another Number one in 1587 Englishman John White led a group of 118 colonists to what was supposed to be a brief stay in Ronoke and 115 of those colonists were never seen again when White returned to England to get word to Sir Walter Raleigh that they desperately needed more supplies. Number two, the initial exploratory expedition to Ronoke in the summer of 1584 was the first

time the British would see the land that would more for the United States. The first time the English would lay eyes upon American Indians living in present-day United States and everyone got along splendidly for that one trip. And then would never coexist like that again. Number three on August 18th, 1590, John White returned to Ronoq three years after leaving to get supplies and found the settlement completely deserted. The word croat-toen carved into a fence post and important clue in a mystery he would never solve, having to return to England the next day due to a storm.

Number four, people have speculated on what happened to the members of the last colony for over 400 years. Their remains were never found. Maybe the Spanish got them. Maybe they were killed by local tribes. Maybe they were taken in by a local tribe, a tribe known as the Lumby tribe, or maybe something else entirely.

It is, after all, still a mystery. Number five, new info, little innocent Virginia dare. That first English baby born present day America, little baby whose fate would, you know, will likely forever be a mystery, has long been used as a symbol and rallying point for white supremacist groups. Seriously, the name Virginia Dare long associated with various white nationalist groups. It started really in an 1837 magazine story, Eliza Lansford Cushing coined the term

lost colony and created this legend of a fair skin Virginia dazzling the swarthy Indians with her beauty and skill. But Virginia remained chased keeping their uncontrolled passions, like the uncontrolled passions of the American Indians at bay. And the story spawned as genre of the Virgional White Woman being hunted, being chased by non-white agents of foreign subversion. And in the 1830s and influx of non-British immigrants alarmed white Americans. Race relations were volatile and violent. Tens of thousands of American Indians forced West and that trail of tears as we learned last week.

Nat Turner led a slavery rebellion. It was brutally suppressed. The plight of an innocent white girl wandering the dark forest amongst lusty savages spoke to Americans who worried that people of British heritage were losing their grip on the young republic. Soon newspapers were referring to the first Anglo-American, Ms. Virginia Dare. And then her popularity spiked again at the turn of the 20th century when more than one million immigrants each year flooded into the US, prompting again white fears of race suicide. Italians and Jews made up the bulk of the new arrivals, typically not considered

whites. In a 1901 best-selling poem called The White Doe by Sally South All Cotton, an evil Indian shaman, one of the slaves of superstition, turns Virginia the heir of civilization into a white dough. She eventually dies a tragic death to pave the way for British domination of the savage continent. At the 1907 exposition celebrating Jamestown's 300th anniversary of Virginia Dare hailed in the North Carolina exhibit as the infant child of pure Caucasian blood, who launched the birth of the white race in the Western hemisphere. Even now, white supremacists and their allies claim Virginia Dare is their own currently

mostly to the website VDare.com. Website described by critics critics being white supremacist the folks at the southern poverty law center list vdare is a hate group specifically anti-immigration hate website that regularly publishes articles by prominent white nationalist race scientists and anti-semites so while we don't know what happened to the real virginia dare we do know what happened to her legacy

it was co-opted by a bunch of aggressively ignorant assholes. Time to suck. Tough five takeaway. Rhono, sucked. Love a mystery. And a good excuse to learn more about American history, which I knew so tragically a little about two years ago. When I started this project, almost exactly two years ago.

Ah, it's been two years that sucked out. And to think I initially fought so hard to keep from being a history podcast, man. And man, so fun. It's fun to have a little moment of reflection here just two years ago. You know, once that first episode, just yeah, some minimal equipment

on a used little kitchen table that I had, it's kind of janky. One of the little wings didn't work quite right, sitting in this dumpy little West LA apartments, and now in the Suck dungeon, in the Suck dungeon, got a bunch of cool shits around me. Pretty sweet you guys, pretty sweet, thank you for that. Thanks again to the Time Suck team,

the high priestess of the Suck Harmony Velocamp, Jesse Guardian of Grammar Dobner, Reverend Dr. Joe Paisley, Time Suck, high Priest Alex Dugan, the guys at Bidelixer, the team, danger brain, spaces, there's merch wizards, access to peril, Queen of the Suck and Boss of everything, Lindsey Cummins, I gotta get the Bidelixer guys,

cause I'm kinda nickname. Big, big thanks to Bojangles Research Assistant, Heather, Knowledge Ninja, Rylinder, another very sharp meat sack. So what's up next week? Well next week we really get into October. With a proper October suck, another mystery, a darker one, Lizzy Borden.

Lizzy Borden in all likelihood, brutally murdered her father and stepmother with an axe on August 4th, 1892, and she was 22 years old. The case was big time national news. The trial was, or the trial, the trial. The trial was closely covered by papers across the country. Trials been compared to like the O.J. Simpson trial in terms of just national interest and coverage. And while she was convicted, you know, by the court of public opinion, she was acquitted by the jury and then stayed

in a little town where she supposedly killed her, her folks for the rest of her life. Did she do it? And if not, who did it? We'll look at the crime, the trial, and the strange details of Lizzie's life next Monday. And now let's hear from you. Find out what I messed up, you know, last week, in today's time-, sucker updates. Get him, get him right here.

Today's first update is a terminology update. Coming from a cross-upond, from Scottish sucker, Kieran Shields, Kieran writes, dear glorious sack of Ojangles, just finish listing to your Andrew, mother-fuckin' Jackson's suck, and was happy to find out the origin of redneck and hillbilly comes from my own kind.

No offense was taken by this and I found it pretty funny, since Scotland is known for being a bit rough. I wouldn't usually write into correct your mush mouth, but when the word scotch is used more than once, I feel the need to intervene. Scotch is an adjective to describe items like whiskey or food, scotch pie, scotch egg, et cetera. For some bizarre reason, it's a bit of a trigger

when we're called this in relation to our Anglo-Nabers, which can strike a nerve. Well, as it's usually in relation to our Anglo-Nabers, our Anglo neighbors, which can strike a nerve. Oh, as it's usually in relation to our Anglo neighbors, Anglo neighbors, which can strike a nerve. For the sake of your heritage, use Scottish or Scots to describe the mighty nation of rain and ear and brew in the future. Earn maybe earn brew. Hope this widened you well to knowledge and please keep these episodes coming.

Big love with Scottish soccer. Oh, thank you. I gotta get to Scotland someday. Man, I gotta get up there. I did this Edinburgh festival. I don't know if I'd wanna do that because it's a month long, that's a little bit harder to kids,

but I gotta get to Edinburgh one of these days. Well, thanks an apologies, Kirin. Yeah, Scotch was a term used in some of the older sources I was using for the episode. I had no idea that it'd become a drogatory term. I would never guess that, especially since I'm a big fan of scotch, whiskey, that word has only positive associations for me.

Now I know, and now I know a little bit about my, a little more about my heritage. I gotta do a family tree. I got this 23 me sitting at home, and I gotta find out some family tree stuff, cause I'm curious how much, how Scottish I am. So glad you told me, keep sucking over there in Scotland, keep spreading suck across the pond, I appreciate it.

And now pronunciation correction from Time Sucker, Jesse Lincoln, the first of a few today. Jesse writes, good morning, powerful leader of the suck and profit of Nimrog. I'm not trying to be a stickler with this, but I'm in the middle of the Andrew Motherfucking Jackson podcast.

This is now the second podcast I listen to, where you've mispronounced the word, Brigadier, as in Brigadier General, youonounced the word, uh, Braydeer, as in Braydeer General, you pronounce it with a hard G as you're saying, Bridget Deer, but it's with a soft G like Braydeer, Braydeer General. I only email this to you because I know that this is not the last podcast

where you'd be talking about military people or personnel or things of that nature. I hope it don't sound like too much of a douche right now. You don't. Uh, I hope to shake your hand to the live podcast and to come in October 14th. Oh yeah, I'll be there, I'll be there right after the show. Hildenham Rod, have a good day and ba, ba, ba, ba, ba. You're a faithful time-sucker.

Jesse Lincoln, yeah, Brigadier. Now let's see if that sticks. Brigadier, not bridge, Brigadier, Brigadier. Yeah, and again, not douchey. I don't learn unless you guys correct me. Learning, one of the main points of all this, isn't it? Yeah, thanks, man. And yes, we will be doing more military sucks down the road.

Clayton Duckett rode in with an update that I had a feeling was going to be based on either my mush mouth or poor pronunciation abilities when I read the subject line of Jesus fucking Christ. It made me laugh very hard. Clayton wrote, DJ fucking suck. I don't know if anyone else has mentioned this, but in the end of Jackson's suck, you pronounce appellation as appellation,

which people who live where I'm from Ashville, North Carolina, A.K.A. Bojangles toilet bowl, toilet bowl, get very pissy if you pronounce it any other way than Appalachian. I myself slipped up during a standup show and had some hillbilly butt baby yell at me for the crowd before he stormed out to his jacked up truck and sister wife. I'd love to see you come down here to the weirdest city in the South, suck on and hail

Nimrod. Thank you Clayton. Yes, and hail Nimrod. You know, my defense, if you go to a site like dictionary.com, they pronounce it like I did. But if you go, if you find like actual Southern or saying it like you can't it Forvo.com is an interesting pronunciation website because it's all like User-based. I thought just people sending their submissions for what you know how to pronounce various words and

And there yes you will hear Appalachian What I never known that was the local way and I would love to get back to Asheville a little jewel of the city I did a show at a college there many way. And I would love to get back to Asheville, little jewel of the city. I did a show at college there many years ago and really would like to get back. They have a fun festival there. I think it's still going there every year called Laugh Your Asheville Off. And it's known nationally for a great foodie scene.

Keep spreading the suck in Asheville. And it might just happen. And yeah, thank you again Clayton. One more pronunciation update from Grant Cook. Grant writes insane, dear salt and a mispronunciation Grand Prince of Garble master mother sucker. I just wanted to inform you as a resident of North Carolina Salisbury I said Salisbury Salisbury is pronounced Salisbury not Salisbury I'm not one for caring about these things

But seen as your next suck is based in North Carolina Here's your handy pronunciation guide, and he provides a link. And I use your link this week, Grant, thank you. I hope I hope I was a little better, at least better than last week. I do think I've come a long way in the last two years of the pronunciations, right? Since the, remember the human genome project?

Anyone remember that? Yeah, yeah, we're getting better, do you know? Okay, last one from John Rogers. This is regarding the racism of Andrew Jackson and the misdeeds of the Andrew Jackson. John sent in the clever subject line of Andrew burning in hell not good as Linda, the saint of Jackson.

So if you recall, Linda from last week's Itted to the internet. John writes, dear Reverend Dr. Master of soccer, Dan, and the rest of the team, just wanna start off by saying I love the show and appreciate all the long hours ago into each and every episode.

The passion for knowledge shows within the cult of curious. Hell no rock! Now, the reason I'm riding, I have hated Andrew Jackson for almost my entire life. I was blinded by my hatred and I never bothered to look into anything else about him. You know, what I had, then, about him, then what I had to, oh yeah, for school. My hatred stemmed from the obvious reason, the Trail of Tears. My great, great grandfather, Benjamin Andrew Jesse,

Paul Moon Kilgore was born on the Trail of Tears and almost died on the trail if he did, I would not exist. Because of this, I was basically the internet without the internet. Time suck has made me more open-minded to certain topics that I wouldn't have been otherwise. Listen to this episode, I realized he was actually pretty badass and he's not an awful guy. He just did some things that today's society would frown

upon. Keep bringing us that sweet suck and heal Nimrod, John Rogers. Well, thank you, John. You bring up such an important point. First off, sorry that happened to a member of your family. It's terrible tragedy. Trailed tears, terrible, terrible tragedy, blight on our nation's history. Undeniably terrible. Second, thank you for seeing past it. I know my take on Jackson pissed off a number of you. And I think it's because, you know, we meet Sachs can let our emotions get the best of us. It's natural. And I just want to make it clear that I never said that Jackson's racial attitudes were good, or that all of the things he did were good, because they were not. His attitudes on race were deplorable based on what we know today. And what he did with the trailer tears was disgusting based on what we know today and

hard to really even rationalize in his own time. But it's obvious it seems to have such little respect for another human being as Jackson had for African Americans or for certain American Indians. It wasn't always obvious to not be like that. Like we are all to a certain extent whether we want to admit it or not, products of our environments and products of the times, you know, we live in. You know, there's a reason it's like nature versus nurture. Like, you know, there is our genetics and then, you know, the nurture or environment, it plays a big part in who we are. You know, like, like every Roman leader I can think of had slaves. That was part of their culture. Should we then now discount every deed or accomplishment every Roman emperor

ever achieved? No. They never thought not to have slaves. It just wasn't what people did back then. It was not a part of life to not do that. So the point I wanted to make with interjects was that you know you should judge someone by the standards of the time they lived in because that's the only fair way to judge them. Many of the things we do today may somehow seem monstrous to a generation of people 500 years from now, but that doesn't make us monsters. And also there's a weird thing culturally going on right now where it's like, you know, people will dig into, you know, somebody's social media feed from 10 years ago. They do this athletes a lot right now and find some deplorable thing they posted one

time when they were 15, I wanna crucify them for that, and I think that is fucking ridiculous. I did, oh my God, if social media would have been around when I was a teenager, oh, I'd be fucking strung up for this shit, I've said, just for shock value humor. No, and just for being a dumb shit teenager. I was a fucking idiot in seven ways,

but you know, that's, yeah, supposed to be. I was fucking 14, 15 years old. I just a weird cultural thing that I think is just really, really stupid to wanna just diminish someone to only the worst moments of their life. And that's how they're defined as if there's nothing else they did matters. It is crazy to me, what has gone on?

Some good intentioned movements that have a lot of good to them. I think it taken too far, it sings often do, and then a lot of innocent people also get screwed over. But it's just, yeah, it's like a weird witch hunt vibe culturally right now that I'm not for'm not I'm not for I'm not for it I'm against a witch hunt I was against it you know the Salem witch trials that I'm against now so thanks for understanding John and it sounds like you

have a very cool family tree and thank everyone for today's time sucker updates thanks time suckers I need a net. We all did. That's all for this week, you guys. You meet Sack, you beautiful bastards. Hail Nimrod, try not to get stranded in a foreign land without proper food and supplies. But if you do get stuck somewhere, please, do me a favor and keep on sucking. Oh shit.