Timesuck with Dan Cummins - 155 - Leonardo da Vinci

Starting point is 00:00:00 Leonardo da Vinci, the man, the myth, the guy who did damn near everything better than anyone who had come before him and better than most who came after him, the geniuses genius. There was seemingly nothing this guy couldn't do exceptionally well. He painted some of the most esteemed and valuable pieces of art of all time. He's got detailed schematics for inventions that were in some cases several hundred years ahead of their time. He was an artist, an architect, an inventor, a mad scientist, a student of all things scientific. He possessed the intense curiosity of a thousand curious people, and the drive of ten thousand to follow through on that curiosity with continual experimentation that led towards immense understanding and scientific advancement.

Starting point is 00:00:41 His social circle, including kings, nobles, the other top artists of the Italian Renaissance and the Pope. His natural genius crossed so many disciplines that he epitomized the term Renaissance man. And he did this all despite being born the bastard child of either a peasant or a slave. We're going to have fun today, going to get some inspiration. And I'm probably going to say some super fucked up stuff here and there because it makes me so happy to do that. All kinds of stuff happening on today's, if I can accomplish 1% of what Leonardo da Vinci did, I'll have lived a very full and successful life edition of Time Sacks. I'm Dan Cummins.

Starting point is 00:01:34 He have many suck based nicknames and you are listening to Time Suck. Pumped the upcoming podcast, The Horror Cast, Scared to Death, now on iTunes, I think everywhere else. All the big third party podcast apps, Hey, Lucifina, hope I can scare you like I'm in scare and queen of the suck, Lindsey, go subscribe to scared to death. Nimrod Bojangles and Triple M can take a back seat today.

Starting point is 00:01:54 Hey, you, cold to the curious member. Today's time suck is brought to you once again by longtime supporter of the suck, Lisa. Yeah, yeah, yeah, put your butt on, Alisa. The only thing that you should spend more time with your high- with your high knee touching than your Lisa mattress is your undies. Or, you know, live free and have nothing spend more time with your bare bottom than Alisa mattress. Hey, Lucifina. Lisa's on a mission to give your body the rest it needs with two awesome mattresses, plus accessories and bases for a better place to sleep. They also believe in providing a better

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Starting point is 00:03:15 Fans like myself, we can list all five albums and I have been now on Spotify, Apple Music, Amazon, iTunes, YouTube Music, Pandora and more. Tool also announced a brand new album. The one we tool fans have been waiting for since 2006, Fear Enoculum, available now. It dropped on August 30th and it's long, it's worth, it's worth a long wait. I mean, I had to record this on August 27th. So I, I have only heard the Fear Enoculum single, but love it. And I also have read reviews about the upcoming album,

Starting point is 00:03:46 upcoming to me. Now as you're hearing this, out now, critics saying that it lives up to the hype. Worth the long wait. So star listed the tools and tire music hell out today. Don't miss their new album, Fear and Nockulum, released just this past August 30th. Thanks to anyone who came to the Hollywood

Starting point is 00:04:02 and San Diego shows, hoping they went really well. Next day to Chicago, get to Thalia Hall, one show Friday, September 13th, Friday the 13th Chicago, fucking get there. Phoenix Copper Blues live, September 19th to the 21st, a live time suck, Ant Hill Kid suck on the 21st Indy after that, being Indianapolis at the Helium New Comedy Club, more dates at Dancomans.tv. Get back to school and style this year with the Pudy and Juju shirt made up of over 20 different fan renditions of what these weird, lovable little dingolinks might look like.

Starting point is 00:04:33 I love it. Fan artwork t-shirts, all shirts made out of 300% pure zip at Juju, two did it, two did it, Pudy, friendship and love, and also porcupine dick to keep the shirts from getting too soft to sentimental Domestic free range porcupine dick. I'm I dad also to go with this, you know, cuter than a pudy-toot shirt We have an old-school pudy and judy metal lunchbox straight out of the fucking 80s Backpack of those peanut butter sammies throwing this bad boy with some hot apple cider. Showbiz, put it in this lunch box, Shirley. I can picture a little Putin judy walking to their weird little jobs or, you know, boring little jobs, actually.

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Starting point is 00:05:33 Nibra, I'm making this way to the ring. Not to throw down, but to donate. That's pretty cool. September, this host is so many national days. National Chess Day, National German Sandwich Day, National 401K Day. And most importantly to my day, national German sandwich day, national 401k day. And most importantly to my wife, Lindsey Quinn, the suck, Beyonce's birthday. But we're not donating to Beyonce. She's, she's, she's good.

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Starting point is 00:06:56 That song, I can read my bike with no Handelbars, no Handelbars, no Handelbars. You've heard it. Thanks to all the space visitors for allowing us to donate this money on behalf of TimeSuck. Nimrod and Luciferina, very pleased. Announcements are done if good news annoys you. Where do you get on to the life and works of David Chino.

Starting point is 00:07:16 So fitting here to do this, since May, Mark, 500 years since his death, great choice Patreon Space Luzards. And thank you, Space Luzards, for just allowing us to hire our third full time employees. Well, someone who worked for months as a time suck volunteer, then for well over a year, someone making a little bit each month to do so many social media things. You know, she got the private Facebook group started, moderated it, discord started,

Starting point is 00:07:37 moderated it, moved from Portland, Oregon to CDAI to hold just for this job. Harmony Vellicamp, high priestess. Thank you for bringing her to us. So hail Nimrod, now back to the DaVinci. Artist, architect, inventor, engineer, scientist, and more. DaVinci's many talents, interest accomplishments. You know, I've made him the inspiration

Starting point is 00:07:59 of many of us lowly hustlers, grinders, workaholics, other ambitious lunatics working our asses off to try and create something amazing. I sure as shit do not have this man's level of talent, but I may have a touch of his drive to create. So let's get inspired. Let's get to know Leonardo, mother fucking DaVinci. As we'll soon learn DaVinci's many, many interest would take him away from an even greater art career than he could have had, which he had such an amazing one already. It's crazy to think about how famous of an artist he is five centuries after he died.

Starting point is 00:08:33 I mean, DaVinci's paintings are some of the most valuable pieces of art ever created. Even the unfinished and damaged ones, part of their value may lie in their scarcity. There are only under 20 surviving pieces, you know, that DaVinci get credit for, even some of those are, you know, disputed. For some reason, I thought there was way more than that. The most expensive of Da Vinci's works, at least that have been put up for sale so far, called Salvador Mundi or Savior of the world sold at Christie's auction house in New York in 2017 for a record smashing $450.3 million. $17 for a record smashing $450.3 million.

Starting point is 00:09:08 Almost a half a billion fucking dollars. For one painting, for a painting that in my opinion isn't even like in the top five, best paintings you made. And it's pretty beat up. What did Mona Lisa get? I'm gonna tell you later, it's insane what it's valued at. Also this particular divinci painting, the most commonly of his quote

Starting point is 00:09:26 unquote known works thought to be a fraud a lot of members of the art world dispute its authenticity so someone spent 450 million bucks for what might be one of DaVinci's biggest paintings now is that kind of cash to blow on a painting by the way anyway uh... soudi prints about baton beta bin abdulla bin bin Farhan, al-Sad, and the Salad Armandi isn't even currently on display. In fact, no one even knows what the painting is. It's rumored to have deteriorated to a point that it might not be fit for display.

Starting point is 00:09:53 The highest amount paid for a work of art at auction previously was 179.4 million. He made that seem like a small number, whatever, 180 million. Okay, that's one of your trash painting. Those Picasso's women of Algiers in May of 2015, the highest known sale price for any artwork, you know, not necessarily an auction, was $300 million for William DeCoonine's interchange. Modern art sold privately in September 2015 by the David Geffen Foundation, the hedge fund manager, Ken Asi Griffin,

Starting point is 00:10:22 2015 by the David Geffen Foundation, the hedge fund manager, Ken Asee Griffin, the abstract landscape. And if I didn't, I'm not kidding, when I say this, if I didn't know its value, and just saw it at a local art gallery, I literally wouldn't put it in my house if they gave it to me for fucking free. Art is so subjective.

Starting point is 00:10:37 Like I looked at it, I'm like, what, that? To me is a piece of shit. But you know, one man's throw that piece of shit in the trash and burn it, there's another man's $300 million dollar painting. Got a love art. In addition to be known for his art, DaVinci also known for conspiracies. Oh, buddy. Yeah, yeah, let's get weird. After half a millennium, the scholarship on Leonardo's immense and continuing Leonardo's life and work of long been the stuff of speculation, wild theories untrammeled fantasy Says Martin Kemp, Professor Emeritus of art history

Starting point is 00:11:08 at Oxford in one of the world's foremost Leonardo scholars. He says, I get bombarded with things about Leonardo on a regular basis that range from laughable to insane. The bombardiers include neuroscientists, Dennis, ophthalmologist, psychologist, pathologist, geo-morphologists, one of the fuck that is artist photographers, even some art historians.

Starting point is 00:11:28 Campus devised a taxonomy of disinformed or eccentric ideas about Leonardo. He says that there are mystic theorists who believe that secret messages about the nature of the cosmos are concealed in Leonardo's work. Heresy theorists who believe that Leonardo was involved in some sort of religious cabal, geo theorists who follow all of was involved in some sort of religious cabal geothea is who follow all of themselves trying to identify the background landscape in the Mona Lisa and other paintings atribution theorists who want to you know, put Leonardo's name on works that isn't his drag theorist who believe that the Mona Lisa depicts either Leonardo or one of his pupils dresses woman sci-fi theorist.

Starting point is 00:12:00 You know, pretty much exactly what you imagine that believe you some kind of reptilian space lizard, some a newton key Illuminati member Chem calls down down br- Yeah, Chem calls Dan Brown Author of the Da Vinci code the godfather of many of these theories It's funny how one fiction author Writing one fictional novel folks in on Da Vinci has played a part in, you know, mysteries that unravel into other fictional

Starting point is 00:12:25 mysteries written about other fictional and written in other fictional Dan Brown novels, millions forget about the fiction part of his job description. I think they should have treated like Dan Brown. He has written a lot of books about a lot of weird things and he uses, you know, real names, but it's fiction. Kim says that Brown is responsible for the idea that there are hidden codes, messages, mystic geometries, disguise words, esoteric numbers, and a variety of Renaissance paintings. I wonder if the end brown, who's only 55 right now just laughs his ass off

Starting point is 00:12:52 when taking a second to really reflect on how many wackadoodles he is fucking riled up. People now out on the web passing along his ideas that he pulled out of his ass as actual could not be more true wake up sheeple conspiracies. How weird is that? He made all of it up to write a fiction novel and now years later, like I don't even know, maybe millions of people will be like, yeah, I mean, you know that he was part of the primary of Sion.

Starting point is 00:13:19 And all this nonsense. Oh, man. I wonder how many conspiracy nuts even understand what the word fictional means. Carmen C. Bombak, a curator in the Department of Drawings and Prince at the Metropolitan Museum of Art, the author of an upcoming four volume study, Leonardo da Vinci rediscovered. Here's from Leonardo da Cyples on the fringe at least once a week. She says a recent example is two men said that Leonardo's earliest data drawing, the Arno Valley from 1473,

Starting point is 00:13:45 they saw elephants, camels, and birds, and what essentially is a landscape. I commended them for their love of Leonardo, but said there are no elephants or other animals in the drawing. I stared at this image for a few minutes, and I didn't see anything that remotely resembled any animal, especially like an elephant.

Starting point is 00:13:59 For a few minutes, I was pretty sure I saw some sweet boobs, though. Hey, I'll lose to a phoenix. Look at those hot tautas. Pretty sure I saw some sweet boobs though. Hey, I'll lose to a phoenix. Look at those hot totas. Pretty sure I projected those girls into the image. I think it's what people do. They see what they want to see. One of the more widespread Leonardo theories involves the figure of the Apostle John with

Starting point is 00:14:15 his vaguely feminine features in the last supper. The idea here, which parallels the findings of Brown's Robert Langdon, the fictional professor of symbology at Harvard, fictional. Is it Leonardo was depicting not John, but Mary Magdalene. And the church authorities, through the centuries, waged a campaign to cover up this intimate relationship between Jesus and Mary. Zero reputable scholarship supports this interpretation of the last supper.

Starting point is 00:14:40 We're going to have some fun with this particular belief in a few minutes. I'm going to really some fun with this particular belief in a few minutes in a really digging to this one. The Mona Lisa has been the subject of a lot of non-expert speculation hidden images. And the painting have been found, quote unquote, by many Ron Piccarillo and artist and Rochester New York claimed on his website that when he looked at the painting upside down and followed the highlights of her portrait, he was able to spot what turned out to be a lion's head in a head and a buffalo head. He added that quote for me, it helps to only use one eye. And the viewer should be extremely close to the left edge of the painting. Good job, Ron. What do you get to the bottom

Starting point is 00:15:16 of some shit? So glad you spent all that time doing that. Very helpful. Very interesting. The DaVinci may have made it very, very difficult to maybe kind of random spot a few dumb animals hidden into a painting. Like what? Silvano, people dedicate so much to their lives to this stuff. Silvano Vincenti, an art history sleuth who runs something in Italy called the National Committee for the Promotion of Historical and Cultural Heritage, claims that he can discern minute letters painted Mona Lisa's eyes.

Starting point is 00:15:43 In the right eye, for instance, he detects letters L and V The Louvre says that it is a you know very famous museum in Paris Says that is examined the painting with every possible laboratory test and is found no letters Huh, yes all the experts at Louvre must be hiding something fucking nights tamper puppets tons of conspiracies revolve around the Mona Lisa. There are hidden messages and symbolism to speculation and Mona Lisa's actually to venture himself for an assistant dressed as woman, as I said earlier. Animals, numbers, you know, sneaking himself into a painting,

Starting point is 00:16:13 maybe dressed as a woman, I hear all that and I think who gives a fuck? Was DaVinci connected to some ancient mysteries? Was you a member of some clandestine secret society and some of those riddles, wackadoodles or take take your tinfo hats and get the fuck off my lawn. According to some, Leonardo was the leader of a secret group called the Priory of Sion. According to the Da Vinci Code, fictional book, it was a Priory's mission to keep the secret of Mary Magdalene and her marriage to Jesus' life. While the Da Vinci Code is fiction, it is based on theories from a controversial nonfiction

Starting point is 00:16:45 book entitled Holy Blood Holy Grail written by Michael Badgent, Richard Lay, Henry Lincoln in the early 1980s. Holy Blood Holy Grail cites the evidence for Leonardo's membership in the secret priori of Sion as a number of documents deposited in the Bibliotech National in Paris. But is that even true? We're, spoiler alert. No, we're going to look into the priori of sign in just a bit. We have talked about that group before and debunked it previously.

Starting point is 00:17:10 We're going to get into that again here soon. So let's take a second to point out one thing before we do that. The DaVinci really did do that helps conspiracy theorists believe lots of crazy shit about the man. DaVinci really was not a stranger to secret codes. A lot of his notes were written backwards with quote unquote mirror writing. It's unclear exactly why Leonardo did this. It's been suggested that he may have felt that some of his military inventions would be

Starting point is 00:17:32 too destructive and powerful. If they fell into the wrong hands, therefore he protected his notes by using a reversed method of writing. Other scholars point out this type of encryption was pretty easy to break. You only need to hold the paper up to a mirror to read it. Not exactly a real, you know, secret code. If Leonardo was used now for security, he probably was only just trying to protect his, the contents from a casual observer, just kind of like walking by or glanced over his shoulder for a second. And other researchers have suggested that he used this reverse writing because he just found it easier to write

Starting point is 00:18:00 that way and he was a weird eccentric genius. He was left handed. It would have made writing backwards less difficult for him than, than for a right handed person. Now, I just think it's funny that some people think he wrote backwards to hide powerful inventions from powerful people. Like, people like the leaders of the church, leaders of nefarious secret societies, as if these powerful leaders just weren't smart enough to figure out he was fucking just writing backwards. It's literally the easiest code to break. Just hold up to mirror code broken. Okay.

Starting point is 00:18:30 So let's take a second now, examine the juiciest conspiracy I've teased a bit here. This one involving Dan Brown's DaVinci code, the last suffer painting, and the priori of Sion. Let's pop into today's idiots of the internet. Idiots, I'll be internet. Get internet. Okay, the video I looked at today is called a Does the Last Supper Really Have a Hidden Meaning? It's published by the Smithsonian channel,

Starting point is 00:18:57 barely reputable. June 18, 2013, four minute video, it looks into the Dan Brown DaVinci Code's novels claimed that the figure sitting to the right of Jesus in the painting is not the disciple John as the church claims, but instead Mary Magdalene and that Mary is the Holy Grail. So what does that even mean? That would mean that Mary bored Jesus at least one child. Scandal alert, Jesus was not celibate, and if Jesus wasn't celibate, that means that Christian churches have been enforcing a patriarchy based on lies.

Starting point is 00:19:28 That means that the Catholic church in particular has built its entire celibate, you know, priest-based workforce on lies. It's all been a scam for the church to maintain unnatural dominion over its faithful. When the truth was, Jesus was just a dude, so calm the fuck down on the celibacy, and on the necessity of the

Starting point is 00:19:45 priests. And it could also mean that the bloodline of Christ led past his death, that the descendants of Jesus walk amongst us, you know, the literal descendants. They're the holy grail. And what does that mean? You know, what does Da Vinci try to tell us? Well, it means that Christ descendants are part God. Therefore, they might have some kind of God-like wizard powers.

Starting point is 00:20:03 These God-wisards are probably illuminati leaders or maybe they've been hidden generation after generation by night's templars or Freemasons or priori of Sion people. Maybe they've made to think that they're not God wizards because the church is afraid of them. They can, you know, tipty balance of power. Maybe the Catholic church is trying to exterminate them because there are threats to its very existence. Look, no one can really seem to agree on all this shit. There's a lot of different conspiracies that just kind of spiral out from this basic belief that Mary Magdalene was sitting next to him. A lot of people just seem to agree that DaVinci tried to expose some carefully guarded secrets in his paintings. They could shake up the current power structure

Starting point is 00:20:35 of the world. Somehow, I think, again, a lot of these conspiracies, you know, fall apart pretty quickly when you try and find out exactly what they do, in fact, me. If they seem to have just more of a general vibe of just like we're trying to find out what it means. We just know that they're fucking hiding something, Dan. Okay. The global elites are making a difficult to find out what you're hiding. So what exactly is the Holy Grail even supposed to be anyway? A turn gets tossed around. Well, the Grail is that fabled artifact that usually shows up as the cup the Jesus drank of it the last supper. We spent some time talking about this in suck 140 legends of King Arthur. We learned in that sucks that the Holy Grail is an invention of our, our, our 30 and

Starting point is 00:21:10 legend myth making. Like no one even talked about it in the first millennium after the death of Christ. It doesn't show up at all until 1190. In this Smithsonian video, a DaVinci expert carefully explains that St. John always looked like a woman in other, you know,Vinci expert carefully explains that St. John always looked like a woman in other, you know, previous traditional paintings of the last supper. You know, DaVinci didn't just come up with this last supper idea and the way he arranged and everything.

Starting point is 00:21:33 It was part of a tradition of many frescoes and murals and paintings. A lot of different Renaissance guys did last supper paintings. Many of them well before DaVinci. So DaVinci had to follow some kind of like, you know, traditions when he's doing this painting. And then that's why, you know, in these paintings, St. Peter, you know, handles a knife, Judas carries a purse of silver. And that's why Da Vinci's depiction of St. John is feminine. It's tradition. He looks feminine in all of the church commission last supper paintings completed by a variety of other artists. Da Vinci didn't invent this.

Starting point is 00:22:01 Da Vinci did break one tradition in his painting. His rendition of the last supper is the first known example of Jesus and his disciples not having halos. What does that mean? Did DaVinci think that these people were not saints and that they were just dudes? Possibly. Or maybe someone told him to do that. They thought it would look cooler. Who the fuck knows? Maybe just random artistic whimsy. The narrator of this miscellany video also quickly points out that there are no hidden letters in the painting, alluding to Mary Magdalene being a in the painting and be her womb being the real Holy Grail. And when you look at it, there's just not any hidden letters clearly. Okay, but now that we kind of have an understanding of what this video is, let's look at the comments.

Starting point is 00:22:37 Renee S. writes, people believe that this painting holds a hidden meaning because DaVinci was supposedly in the prior era of Sion. And then Mandy J. Madison quick to reply. She writes, you seem to have missed out on the most important important point that the expert in this documentary is making. Dan Brown's book is all caps, fiction. None of it is true. The letters are not there.

Starting point is 00:23:00 The young person is not Mary Magdalene. There is no reference whatsoever to the Holy Grail. The Priory of Sin didn't exist and Mandy's right. There was no Priory of Sin. We covered that in bonus Suck 23, followed the Knights Templar. We learned that a Wacketyl named Pierre Plentard made it all up. He invented a secret organization within the Knights Templar tasked with ensuring Christ's blood descendant survived

Starting point is 00:23:23 and that the real identities were kept secret for fear that the church would kill them. Pulled the whole thing out of his whack into the last this same guy here also claimed that, you know, as prophesied by Nosferdomis that he would become the French emperor. He would, you know, retain or, you know, take the Holy Roman Empire, bring it back, take it to it's, you know, to new heights of glory and that he would fight the devil during the second coming of Christ. And you know, he didn't do that. He died porn unknown in February, there are 2000 and there are still spins. There was no big battle. There is no Holy Roman Empire, no rapture, blah, blah, blah.

Starting point is 00:23:59 Sometimes I scare myself by the way with all the weird shit that I now know, thanks to these episodes way too much weird conspiracy trivia inside my head. I could crush Jeopardy, Jeopardy, Jeopardy categories that would never appear on the show. Nathan Dunlap doesn't give two shits about the real origins of any of this. He believes he just has a hard time expressing those beliefs, writing Renee S. Oh, there are more truth out there in many things, I believe. Some circuit societies are a ribbit on some hidden truths. I back up facts with Bick little meeting. I think you mean the other goods is not even closest, but the one seen eyes more than an eye,

Starting point is 00:24:35 but a mind and they got this from the Bible. I will lead you with my eye mind. Okay. Mind I spirit and side soul. That's a sentence. Not just an eye or set of eyes. What the fuck? Not just an eye or set of eyes. And God, we trust. That's another sentence. I don't know. There's some hidden truths, even in druid time, Egyptians, Godelaming and Norick written in stone tablets. Okay. Thank you, Nate. I hope you're out there

Starting point is 00:25:01 of somewhere raising kids. I'd be ashamed not to have someone to pass all of your awesome knowledge down to. Patty Kelly wants to believe she knows why Mary Magdalene was hidden from us and she's pissed about it. She writes, Mary Magdalene was hated for being a woman and jealous he surrounded her for how Jesus felt about her. When male religious leaders turn everything into a boys club, they shun their own birth givers, mothers. It's disgusting how religion has been used and turned against spirituality and to control, keeping women down and men boastful, filled with arrogance and pride,

Starting point is 00:25:30 which is not something God would like. And I really like patty's thoughts. I truly do. I agree that most religions have, you know, have had a misogynistic patriarchal agenda woven into them. Nassim Zway does not agree with Patty. He has a very different theory on why women specifically were left out when it came to church leadership, writing one sentence. It's because women suck Satan's dick. Okay, then. All right.

Starting point is 00:25:57 Patty has yet to reply to this difference of opinion. I would love it if she did take it seriously. It just wrote something back like, interesting observation. Nassim Zway, I hadn't thought of all the devil dick sucking when I made my initial post. Can you send links to theological explanations that help give credence to your claims of satanic phallacio?

Starting point is 00:26:13 Would love to continue examining your very credible and not at all inflammatory hypothesis? Captain seven, seven, Harris posts, I'm not sure about the letter of thing, but that one figure does appear to be a woman, and that is super annoying. It's annoying because a good two fucking minutes of the four minute video is dedicated specifically

Starting point is 00:26:32 to carefully explaining how there was a long tradition of artists commissioned by the church to paint last supper scenes to painting John as being feminine. Why? Because he was the youngest of possible. It was just symbolic. It's not some secret symbol, Da Vinci has snuck into the painting. You know, instead of making him tiny to depict

Starting point is 00:26:49 John being younger, artists just made him look a little more feminine. Since young men do look more feminine than older men, because that's how fucking life works. Series of older, last supper paintings are shown to prove this in this video that this guy is completely just ignored. The world's top, debentied expert is interviewed and still Captain Dumpfuck doesn't listen rights. One figure does appear to be a woman though. That is just as ignorant as if you watch someone who made a video explaining how a mirage

Starting point is 00:27:17 works. They break down the exact scientific principles that come together to make it look like there's water in the distance when there in fact is no water. Experts come on, talk about it, diagrams are fucking drawn out, and shown, footage is evaluated, carefully dissected, everyone agrees that it looks like there's water when there is for sure, not water, and that's how a mirage works. And then someone like Captain Seven, Seven Harris just writes, not sure about the whole light refracted by Warmare near the ground thing, but there for sure is some water in the distance.

Starting point is 00:27:47 Why is that? Lisa Ametri writes, why is the Holy Grail on the wall and not on the table where it once was just asking, Mandy J. Madison doesn't care for this question. She's losing her shit. She's popping back up in the feed. She replies, what this video is telling you is that the book is nonsense. Did you miss that point? It isn't about the holy grail.

Starting point is 00:28:07 I can see her typing this just here. Just like, what, God damn it! We're talking about a real painting! That's a stupid book. Fucking damn brown, look what you've done. And I'll leave you with Tom Atou, who should probably listen and learn more and type a lot less.

Starting point is 00:28:22 He writes, first of all, who the hell was DaVinci? In my point of view, he was just a painter, a man who painted, he has that in quotes for some reason, who painted pictures of things, he visualized in his mind, the last supper, it's just a painting made up in his mind of what the last supper might have looked like.

Starting point is 00:28:40 The painting has no meaning nor fact about crap because he was not present at the time of event. Thank you, Tom. Thank you for showing up. Hey, buddy, I want you to grab your participation trophy. It's out back by the fucking dumpster where your brain lives. What are you talking about? Only people who are there can be trusted when it comes to the accuracy of

Starting point is 00:29:03 historical event. All right. Well, let's just take 90% of the Pulitzer Prize winning biographies, you know, of important people and this fucking Burnham This is Burnham. They weren't there throw them out. They weren't at event throw them out Attention all history professors. If you weren't at event shut the fuck up You don't know facts about crap Beat it Roman history experts. None of you tricks he fuckers were there. So enough with your horse crap.

Starting point is 00:29:30 Hey guy, working on Thomas Jefferson term paper. Take computer and shove it up your line ass. You don't know crap about crap, crap face. Hey, paleontologist, remember that one time you hung out with dinosaurs? No, then pack up your crap. Get job crap holes That's all for today's it of idiots of the crappy internet I gotta say I'm feeling better about that education donation. We've made this month

Starting point is 00:30:03 So important it's so important. Please, please educate your kids. Please, God, please. Okay. Now that I've hopefully shown there is a much credence to DaVinci conspiracies, let's look into how coolest life actually was. Like legit, one of the coolest lives ever in my opinion

Starting point is 00:30:20 in the history of all lives. Let's get to know this, a scrublin' and a doodling some bitch. Let's dig into life and achievements of today's Renaissance Man and today's Time Suck timeline right after a word from our next sponsor. Time Suck is brought to you by hymns. Makers of man lotions and so much more.

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Starting point is 00:31:57 See website, website for full details on my mouse on fire today and save information. This could cost hundreds if you went in person to the doctor's office or pharmacy go to four hymns.com slash time suck ed. That's f-o-r-h-i-m-s dot com slash time suck ed for him's dot com slash time suck ed. Lincoln is episode description all sponsor links there Leonardo mother fucking DaVinci timeline right now. Shrap on those boots, soldier. We're marching down a time, suck timeline. Leonardo DaVinci was born on April 15th, 1452, at the third hour of the night. Around 10 p.m., in the Tuscan Hills town of Vinci and

Starting point is 00:32:46 the lower Valley of the Arno River and the territory of Florence. His birth was recorded by his paternal grandfather and a journal. Vinci just outside of Florence, only 35 kilometers, just over 20 miles west of the fame city of the Renaissance, the main attraction of this little 14,650 person town, Iish area, outer suburb of Florence is the Leonardo da Vinci museum Or you know to say it in Italian Museo Lienadino come through the paintings stick it on for the pizza pie. Yeah, it's a Mario I'm gonna do my best not to keep slipping into a bad cartoonish Italian

Starting point is 00:33:20 Stereotypical accent based only on the Mario brothers, but it's gonna be hard not to keep doing it I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love Da Vinci was born. His birth home still stands, which is pretty awesome. You can get to walk up a trail through an olive tree grove to get there, how very Italian. The home was recently reopened to the public after a careful restoration project. La Casa Natel de Leonardo. Da Vinci was the illegitimate son of Miser Piero, Prusino, De Antonio Da Vinci, a Florentine notary and lawyer,

Starting point is 00:34:04 member of a family of minor nobles and Catalina, a peasant who may have been a slave from China or the Middle East. Humble beginnings. He was a bastard. Literally. The illegitimate child that perhaps a slave, loving him even more right now, and actually being born illegitimately paved the way for Leonardo to become an artist. Had he been born legitimately, he would have been expected to take part

Starting point is 00:34:25 in the family business of being a notary or a lawyer. Notaries, by the way, played an important role, drawn up commercial contracts, land sales, wills, other legal documents, and Latin, for the emergence of Florence's flourishing trade and banking industries. Since he wasn't legitimate, the culture of the day dictated that he was forbidden to join the family business,

Starting point is 00:34:43 which opened the path to art for him. Also Leonardo was also lucky to have been born a bastard in Italy in the mid-15th century, because unlike other times in European history, other places in Europe, it wasn't a social hindrance. 19th century cultural historian Jacob Burkhart went so far as to label the Italian Renaissance a golden age for bastards. Pius II, who was the pope, Leonardo was born, wrote about visiting a Farada, Italy,

Starting point is 00:35:08 where his welcoming party included seven princes from the ruling Este family, among them the reigning Duke, all born out of wedlock. Right? So yeah, now back to Leonardo's mother. Mother, bring up my pizza pie, a mother. Maybe some of meatballs on a stick of mother. A catarina was a common aim for slaves at that point. Some analysis led some to believe

Starting point is 00:35:31 supposedly an art of fingerprint had features common to people of Middle Eastern origin. Most scholars seem to think she was not a slave, just a very poor peasant. Camp that a merits his professor of art history at Oxford University said that his research into the archives of Vinci and Florence suggested that that katarina and her brother poppul were orphans who lived in a derelict farmhouse with her grandmother just outside of inchi meanwhile say a pieto da vinci was on his way to becoming a successful lawyer in florins and was engaged to be married. Piero's family and his father side have been active in florin teen politics for three centuries and they owned farmland in numerous businesses in the area.

Starting point is 00:36:06 So you know, they were a family of means. On Seattle's mother's side, his family owned ceramic kilns in the nearby town of Bacarito. Incredibly powerful and influential Italian Medici family, who will show up later in this suck a bit, had a hunting lodge in Bacarito and would buy the now famous Cobalt Blue Majolaque ceramic pottery still seen a Florence today. In places like, you know, Florence's oldest active hospital, the hospital of Santa Maria Nueva. During a visit to his hometown in July 1451,

Starting point is 00:36:33 Ser Piero, Ser Piero met a young woman named Catarina and she became pregnant. So, you know, I guess he did more than just meet her. In case you don't know how babies are made, he put his penis inside of her vagina, where it would remain, at least for a moment post ejaculation and did this at least once. Then as would be customary, his family seems to have given her a dowry so that she would have enough value to be married off to another man. Which is pretty

Starting point is 00:36:59 kind of crazy. Saudi again, but she's not in the home in the another she had no longer has a her purity to offer a young standing man Maybe there's a five of coats, uh, Will learn to find a fellow into a male to be That allowed me to introduce my brother Luigi. He protect her from a Bowser. Uh, how weird and sad is that there's a lot of truth What I just joke about like that really

Starting point is 00:37:20 That was how people thought of women like historically a woman's value was located primarily just between Her legs like she was a car. Once she'd been thrown off the lot, her value depreciated immensely, a very primitive, uh, reductionary way to look at somebody. Professor Kemp figured all this out managed to property tax records, also found that Sapeado conducted a minor legal transaction for Catarina's husband, another connection linking the artist's parents.

Starting point is 00:37:43 Leonardo has no surname in the modern sense. Da Vinci doesn't come from his dad, or does has nothing to do with him being a bastard, just means of Vinci, as in he was born in the village of Vinci. His full birthday was actually, Leonardo, they see a piedo da Vinci, meaning Leonardo, son of se piedo, from Vinci. He spent his first five years mainly in the hamlet of Anciano with his mother then lived primarily in the household of his father, grandparents at uncle Francesco in the small town of Vinci. Anciano is essentially to neighborhood inside the commune of Vinci, a commune being an administrative division of Italy. And the commune boundary is

Starting point is 00:38:20 sometimes a little different than where the city actually ends visually. Think of it like a tiny American county. Not clear exactly why Leonardo went to live with his father when he's about five, but since we know that the man was a genius, he most likely showed a glimmer of his future intellectual and artistic abilities when he was a small boy. And his father, having a lot more means in his mother, would be able to provide him with an education that she could not. We do know that he didn't go live with his dad because mom died because record show that 35 years after her son was born, Katarina went to live with Leonardo briefly, record showing

Starting point is 00:38:51 that he paid for her funeral. If Katarina and did give him to his birth father to be given opportunities, she could not give him all admit that I'm speculating regarding this. But if true, wow, what an incredible sacrifice. I'm continually amazed by stories like that from history. Like where a parent chooses to let someone else raise their kids to give them a better chance of having a comfortable life, so incredibly selfless, such an enormous sacrifice.

Starting point is 00:39:15 I can't imagine that with Kyler Monroe, losing time with them due to divorce was hard enough and incredibly hard, very painful. You can't imagine essentially saying goodbye to them, hoping, you know, or at least, you know, for most of their life so that they could, you know, have a life that I knew I couldn't give them. Whew. Yeah, yes. I had enough to feel some emotions talking about that. So 14 of 57. Let's get back to our lean-hearted event. She five years old, goes live with his dad, Seattle, and his father's wife, Albieta.

Starting point is 00:39:44 Piero had married a 16-year-old Albieta, De Giovanni, Adamadoli, daughter of a prominent Florentine shoemaker in 1452 when he was 25, and Albietta loved her little illegitimate stepson, Leonardo, like he was her own. In 1462, when Leonardo was 10, it is believed he began his formal artistic education. Little else was known about Leonardo's early years. Later life, he would record only two childhood incidents in his journals. One which he regarded as an omen was when a hawk-like bird called a kite dropped from the sky hovered over his cradle at two years old.

Starting point is 00:40:17 Its tail feathers brushing his face, opening his mouth. He would be obsessed with the art and science of flying all his life. He attributes some of that to that at that moment The second incident occurred while exploring in the mountains a little Leo discovered a cave and was both terrified It's some great monster might lurk inside and also it was driven by curiosity to go inside and find out if it was there So showed you know that great you know determination to follow his curiosity as a young child Leonardo's early life has been the subject of a lot of historical conjecture, a lot of tales about him that are probably just myths and legends. The sorry a 16th century biographer of Renaissance painters tells of how a local peasant requested that

Starting point is 00:40:53 see a pieto ask his talented son to paint a picture on a round plaque. Leonardo responded with a painting of snake spitting fire, which was so terrifying that see a pieto sold it to a Florentine art dealer who sold it to the Duke of Milan. Meanwhile, having made a profit, Sierpietto bought a plaque decorate with a heart pierced by an era which he gave to the peasant. Okay, so now back to 1462, where Leonardo is 10, began in his artistic education. If you'll recall, Sierpietto's family had a Kielman bacarito, which was the center of our artistic ceramic work in the Florence district, the most important and artistic area in all of Europe, if not in all of the world at that time.

Starting point is 00:41:30 In the mid-15th century, the Italian Renaissance was still ramping up. Renaissance is essentially a fancy word for rebirth, and toward the end of the 14th century, a handful of Italian thinkers declared that they were living in a new, reborn age. The barbarus, an unenlightened Middle Ages were over, a new age of learning and literature, art and culture had begun. 15th century Italy was unlike any other place in Europe, especially Florence. But yeah, but Italy, it was divided into independent city states, each with a different form of government, Florence,

Starting point is 00:41:59 where the Italian Renaissance began, the city state Leonardo's birth fell under the jurisdiction of, was an independent republic, also a banking and commercial juggernaut after London and Constantinople. It was the third largest city in Europe at the time. wealthy Florentines like the Medici family flaunted their money in power by becoming patrons or supporters of artists and intellectuals likely in order to venture. And because of this artistic patronage, Florence became the cultural center of Europe and of the Renaissance itself. Very cool. Those guys thought to do that. And what

Starting point is 00:42:30 great art was produced largely by families like the Medici or because of them, because they were able to support artists like Da Vinci. In addition to Leonardo Da Vinci, the Florence art scene would produce other Renaissance artists, teenage mutant Ninja Turtles, Michael Angelo Donatello, Raphael. Michael Angelo created stuff like the Statute David, the painting of the Sistine Chapel. He was one of the architects of the famed and awe-inspiring Vatican Cathedral, helped design St. Peter's Basilica, architects, sculptor, and painter Donatello, created the equestrian statue of Gata Maletta that stands today in the Piazza del Santo in Padua, Italy. They're also multi-talented Raphael, created works such as Madonna of the pinks, a beautiful

Starting point is 00:43:07 painting showcased today in the National Gallery of London that is not a leg-splade wide-open crotch shot, despite what is named clearly implies. Sorry about that. Began on Lucidvina. Florence also kicked out a Sandro Baticelli, one of my favorite Renaissance artists who produced beautiful paintings like the birth of Venus, seen today in Florence's Yufiti Gallery, and Venus and Mars in the National Gallery of London as well. And what feels like a century ago,

Starting point is 00:43:30 when I went to school for a few months, London I used to sit in awe in front of Venus and Mars, blown away, trying to figure out how something so beautiful and artistically powerful was created so long ago. Leonardo Da Vinci's painting, The Virgin of the Rocks, one of two of those, also housed in London's

Starting point is 00:43:44 the National Gallery, also blew me away the detail, the color saturation, the mood and feelings evoked, you know, by this painting, just true masters of art. And 10-year-old Da Vinci is there in the midst of this great artistic revival, this great awakening. His fame is the product of being born with a great mind in a great time and faith placing him in the right situation. Leonardo grown up just outside of Florence in the midst of Florence's Renaissance, his father's family owned to kill him where the Medici family will buy ceramic materials that are put to use by artistic masters and new buildings and monuments built to showcase to showcase Florence's power and strength. And we think this is when his artistic education begins. At early initiation of this age or younger, has been more conclusively documented

Starting point is 00:44:26 in the lives of other Renaissance artists. We have better childhood records of guys like Raphael, who was apprentice to Pietro, Pedogino, another notice, Renaissance artists by the age of 10. So 1464, Leonardo's now 28 year old stepmother, Albieta dies during childbirth. The baby was to be Sapeitos, first legitimate child, but Santa the babyada dies during childbirth. The baby was to be Sampieros, first legitimate child, but standard, the baby also dies during the birth. That same year, 37 year old Sampieros,

Starting point is 00:44:50 quickly remarried Francesca, De Sera, Giuliano, Manfredini, listed in some sources, being 15, other sources being 20, little else has written about her, other than that she died early into the marriage and did not produce legitimate air. What's interesting here is that despite his first two wives, not producing a legitimate air, Leonardo's father does not go through a legal process to make a legal air out of Leonardo, which was possible.

Starting point is 00:45:14 You can go to the courts and go through a process to make this happen. Historians think that Cipieto did not go through this legal process because Leonardo likely had already shown a passion for and a talent in the arts, and he didn't want to take an artistic future away from his son. 1466, the age of 14, Leonardo's artistic education taken to the next level. Now we have some documentation of what's going on with his life. He gets

Starting point is 00:45:36 apprentice to one of the most successful artists of the day. Andrea, Andrea de Sione, better known as Vrocchio. Vrochio, his most famous work of artists, his sculpture, the equestrian statue of Battalomio, or Battalomio, Calioni, which can be seen today in Venice in the Camposante, Giovanni, the Apollo, City Square. Vrochio had himself studied under Donatello, and he served as an official sculptor

Starting point is 00:46:03 to the Rulimidici family. Not only a skilled artist but a skilled teacher, Virocchio's workshop was in the heart of Florence's intellectual and cultural epicenter, assuring the young Leonardo of a fine education in the humanities. Other famous painters, apprentice or associated with the workshop, include Gerlandio, Perogino, Bataccelli, and other names that sound like stuff. You would say ordering something delicious at an authentic Italian pizza ria. Yes, I'd like a gelandillo.

Starting point is 00:46:31 The gelandillo, please. Can I get some of Peragino papers? Can I have some of fresh gran the Batacelli, sprinkle on top of the pizza pie? A plate for two. I got a shadow with my pants as pizza. Getting this apprenticeship was definitely a good news, bad news kind of deal. The good news about getting into apprenticeship in Virochio's workshop was at Leonardo would be exposed to a vast range of technical skills and how the opportunity to learn drafting,

Starting point is 00:46:57 chemistry, metallurgy, metalworking, plaster casting, leatherworking, mechanics, carpentry as well as the artistic skills of drawing, painting, sculpting, modeling, from one of the best teachers in the world, surrounded by other amazing students who would go on to become some of the world's greatest artists. DaVinci's love for studying the anatomy of living things also likely began here in this artistic think tank workshop. The bad news about this apprenticeship

Starting point is 00:47:20 is that DaVinci was likely repeatedly sodomized by Verrocchio, other masters operating out of the workshop, and even other students farther along in their apprenticeships, as was sadly customary at the time, what the fuck? The origin of the phrase, pain or dues, is thought to have come from this 15th century Italian practice, which itself was pulled from ancient Roman and Greek traditions, and then it had a, you know, sad revival during the Renaissance. And I guess no one seemed to think it was wrong to do that to kids as young as 10 back

Starting point is 00:47:51 then. Weird bit of history to try and contemplate. Da Vinci, Michael Angelo, Raphael, Donatello, Bonatelle, all these other Italian masters, Sodomized repeatedly for several years as children in order to learn the skills that allowed them to produce beautiful art later in life that we now know them for. It's going to make it a little difficult to look at these paintings the same way. I'll go in forward. Even among the greats, Leonardo stood out as one of the best. If not the best, he would collaborate with Furokio on his baptism of Christ, a painting of a young angel holding Jesus his robe, complete to some time between 1472 and 1475.

Starting point is 00:48:26 Legend has a divinity painted in a manner that was so far superior to his masters that Virokio put down his brush, never painted again. This is probably a little more myth making, but when you look at the two painters works, Leonardo clearly did possess superior ability. Leonardo himself may have been the model for two works by Virokio, including the bronze statue of David in the bargello and the archangel Michael into Tobias and the angel. But creepy was what I was mentioned earlier. Around 1471 in Virocchio's shop, 19 year old Leonardo works with Barachelli, Peragino, Lorenzo di Creti, and Gellandio. Here in the first half of the 1470s, these various

Starting point is 00:49:01 masters collaborated on numerous works, producing a variety of important pieces of art from Tobias and the Arkane to Raphael and the National Gallery in London to Dreyfus Madonna, currently in the National Gallery of Art and Washington DC. That one is generally primarily attributed to Lorenzo D'Ecreti, but Verrocchio and a young Davinci, believed to have also worked on it. This collaboration is what made it difficult later to ascertain which works. Really were Da Vinci's in which were forgeries or fakes.

Starting point is 00:49:31 No worthy for their high quality complexity of the baptism of Christ, the Nunchation and the enunciation, and the Uffizi, two masterpieces of synthesis in which Leonardo's role is evident, is cool that Da Vinci worked with other masters. By 1472, a day to 20 Leonardo qualified as a master in the guild of St. Luke, a highly respected guild of artists, they give it kind of like a union almost, or a university, and doctors of medicine. Even after his father set him up in his own workshop, though, his attachment to Virocchio, what's such that he continued to collaborate with him. Leonardo's earliest known solo dated work,

Starting point is 00:50:05 drawing in a pen and ink of the Arno Valley, drawn on August 5th, 1473. Oh, and before I forget, Saudi was not part of any Italian Renaissance apprenticeship program. At least not that I'm aware of. I made that up hoping that at least a few new listeners would just be thinking for the next few minutes about like, what the fuck?

Starting point is 00:50:23 Like the guy who painted the Mona Lisa had to go through that. To learn how to do that. I was just a joke and I can't be a, I make a Luigi laugh with the jokes. Sorry, not sorry, JK, not sorry. We know that Leonardo becomes a member of the Florence painter's guild. The 1472 because his name appears in a Florence company's red book of creditors and debtors as Leonardo De Ser Piero Davinci painter. Thank you record keepers. The painting Anunciation or the Anunciation by Leonardo Davinci was painted with Andrea de Verocchio around 1472. One of his earliest done works,

Starting point is 00:50:59 one of my favorites, stunning color saturation, richness and detail. And again, yeah, just, you know, I did not know about a lot of these Renaissance paintings that they were done with a variety of people. Variance to me. In 1869, some critics recognized the enunciation as the youthful work by Leonardo because Verocchio used lead-based paint heavy brush strokes and art historians figured out that he left a note for Leonardo to finish the background and the angel, Leonardo used light brush strokes and no-let. When the enunciation was x-rayed, Baroqueos work as evident while Leonardo's angel

Starting point is 00:51:33 would become invisible, pretty cool how they're able to kind of like figure out like who did what on some of these paintings. 1473 Leonardo draws a landscape on the feast of Santa Maria de la Neve, that pic where the dude thought he saw an elephant hidden in the background. This is earliest known solo drawing that we have a record of. Around 1475, it's believed to begin painting the portrait of Geneva.

Starting point is 00:51:57 Geneva, that fucking something. The art is a weird place. Binchy, currently on display in Washington, DC, at the National Gallery of Art. Why haven't I gone there? I didn't realize that so much cool art was in DC. 1475 Leonardo may have collaborated on the Piazza Madonna for the Pistoria Cathedral Verocchio. That guy that fake needed fake dues had to be paid for Lorenzo Decreti, whose Pradella a painting or sculpture on the front of a raised shelf above an altar, which typically forms the base for an altar piece now in the Louvre.

Starting point is 00:52:27 Around 1475, Leonardo also designs a tapestry for the King of Portugal, which has sadly been lost over time. If you do find it, artist historians would like you to send it to the subject. Peelbox 38919. 492. 83816. We will take good care of it and sell it. I mean, donate it to the highest bidder.

Starting point is 00:52:43 I mean, protector of art things. Leonardo, still working in Baroqueo's shop in 1476. On April 9th, 1476, 24 years old, a major event occurs in his life. He is accused of saturdayme, something I totally forgot about when I was joking about him pants, too. I'll show myself out. Leonardo was arrested along with a few other male companions, one of which he had about when I was joking about him pants, too. I'll show myself out. Leonardo was arrested along with a few other male companions,

Starting point is 00:53:08 one of which he had already been arrested for the crime before, was a well-known prostitute. When no witnesses came forward to testify against the artist and his friends, DaVinci was acquitted on June 16th. The charges were dismissed for lack of evidence. There's speculation that since one of the accused, Leonardo de Torabuani, was related to Lorenzo de Medici.

Starting point is 00:53:27 The Medici family may have exerted its powerful influence to secure a dismissal of this case. The Medici family extremely successful and wealthy merchants and bankers. One of the most, if not the most powerful and wealthy family and not just in Florence, but in all of Europe at this time. Leonardo's journals suggest that the allegations

Starting point is 00:53:44 were somewhat devastating to a man who liked to keep his private life private. And because these accusations, it may have cost us a lot of details about his life. He may have become much more private because he really doesn't say much in his journals that he wrote about his private life. Many speculated that because this atomic charge,

Starting point is 00:54:02 he maintained a life of celibacy, other speculate that he continued to have homosexual relationships or at least flings that he kept extremely private. Many historians think Taventshi wasn't all likely homosexual. He was known in addition to being talented and successful and well liked to also possess what one admire called outstanding physical beauty, and yet he had no known romantic liaisons with any women over the course of his long life. He never married, never had kids.

Starting point is 00:54:27 The only thing he states regarding sex and his nobics at all is the act of procreation and anything that has any relation to it is so disgusting that human beings would soon die out if there were no pretty faces and sensuous dispositions. Okay, agreed to disagree, Leonardo, the nude female form to me long way from discussing. Most beautiful thing on earth, hill is to Fina. Maybe that one time he, you know, he didn't got arrested, maybe he just went out the wrong way with the wrong bodies. And by wrong bodies, I don't mean male bodies, I mean dirty bodies.

Starting point is 00:54:55 You have to go for that clean, Wayne, bro. Dirty dong and a mud butt, it's going to make for a rough first right. Show me, just someone just talk about peanut butter. If you can't take the creamy heat to Vinci you take your monkey and your peeweas out of the spanked my fat bottom to the bleeds kitchen. That's how they do it in Hollywood. Albert Fish Lace and gentlemen, he'll be here all week. Try the field. Showbiz. And maybe he really did become just kind of asexual. Maybe he was asexual. I mean, I have known people over the course of my life that read very, very, very asexual. If we're going to believe

Starting point is 00:55:24 that, you know, sexualities on a spectrum with homosexuality on one side and heterosexuality on the other, I think you also got to believe that asexualities in there, maybe in the middle somewhere. Okay. So sad for sure that homosexuality not acceptable in DaVinci's day, he was lucky he didn't live a few decades earlier because Sodomy and Florence just a few decades prior was a crime punishable by death. 1476 Leonardo da Vinci paints the portrait of Gimbele de Binci.

Starting point is 00:55:49 She was born in 1457, was a lady of the aristocratic class in 15th century Florence admired for her intelligence by Florentine contemporaries. The oil on wood, portrait, permanently acquired by the National Gallery of Art in Washington, DC. In 1967 for five million bucks paid to the princely house of Lichtenstein, a record price of time. Wonder how much that baby would go for now, 750 million? How much trouble would you get in for trying to steal it? Asking for a friend.

Starting point is 00:56:18 It's also the only painting attributed only to the divinity that exists in permanent display in North America. The portrait is one of the highlights of the National Gallery of Art, admired by many for its portrayal of Gianvetas. Her name is so, G-I-N-E-V-R-A. What the fuck? Beautiful, you know, but a steer, she has no hint of a smile in her gaze,

Starting point is 00:56:39 though forward seems indifferent to the viewer. A strip from the bottom of the painting was removed in the past, but presumably due to damage and her arms and hands. I'm gonna call her, go to Ginny. Ginny's arms and hands were lost. In 1478, Leonardo writes in his notebooks that he has begun two virgin marries.

Starting point is 00:56:58 It is also likely that the Benoit Madonna was the first work painted by Leonardo in 1478. Maybe painted by entirely by him. There's a lot of some of the timeline was very difficult in the painting section because we don't know the exact dates. And some people think that one painting was the first one to mine. Someone thinks by his other sofa, if I'm bouncing around a little bit, I apologize. It was a son of a bitch to put together in this section.

Starting point is 00:57:23 The composition of Madonna and child with flowers proved to be one of Leonardo's most, and by the way, on that note, just really quick, I mean, debates continue to this day over a lot of his works. Some works definitively attributed to him by some art scholars, some art historians are thought by others to nope, not by him, but attributed to some other Italian master. Sometimes people think they had a little bit to do with one painting. Other people think they had a lot to do with that one. Yeah, again, a lot of the records regarding specifically the paintings. We have better records for other stuff where you can positively attribute other like sketches and kind of inventions to him. The paintings, the way that they were done with the collaboration and again the lack of records makes it pretty tricky

Starting point is 00:58:07 But yeah 1478 Benoit Madonna painted by Leonardo the British Museum owns two of Leonardo's preliminary sketches for this piece The composition of Madonna and child with flowers proved to be one of Leonardo's most popular works also completed thought to be completed in 1478 It was extensively copied by young painters including Rafael whose own version own version of Leonardo's design, the Madonna of the Pinks, was acquired in 2004 by the National Gallery in London. For centuries, Madonna and childless flowers considered lost, and then in 1909, the Russian architect Leon Benoit, sensationally exhibited it in St. Petersburg as part of his father-in-law's collection. The painting had been apparently brought over from Italy to Russia by the notable connoisseur Alexander Korsakov in the 1790s. Fucking sneaky Russians.

Starting point is 00:58:53 If they're not spreadin' communism or cyber hacking or making dolls that are open to reveal tinier dolls, they're hiding famous paintings. Classic Russian move. Classic Russia. Uh, this painting is currently exhibited in St. Petersburg in the state, hermitage museum. Never heard of it, but apparently it's the second largest art museum in the world. I got to get to St. Petersburg. I can skip.

Starting point is 00:59:12 St. Petersburg would be cool to sell. Dage Leonardo's early works, proving authenticity is difficult, but this picture was probably painted somewhere between 1475 and 1480 when it's recordedly not to produce several virgin marries. The Madonna of the Carnation, aka Madonna with a vase or Madonna with child is an oil painting by DaVinci created sometime around 1478, 1480, permanently displayed in Munich, Germany, in a gallery with the name. It looks like it was created by the devil himself to torture people with pronunciation limitations. It has about 400 consonants and two vowels.

Starting point is 00:59:43 It's been there since 1889 after it was in private ownership. Besides painting stupid babies and shit, Leonardo also did some cool inventing. Let's get to that. Leonardo da Vinci sketched the self-propelled cart. Sometime between 1478 and 1480, for many years, Folio 812R of the Codex Atlanticus was considered a part of Leonardo's famous automobile project. Only recently has it revealed the true nature as a cart device for use in theatrical settings. The Managed Your Page illustration showed two distinct projects, a provincial and preparatory

Starting point is 01:00:14 drawing and a more well-defined one at the center of the folio. Two large spiral springs underneath the horizontal cog wheels of the cart to provide the motive power to set the wheels in motion. They also act as a lever system for theater puppets. An additional ingenious device serves as remote control handbrake. I mean, I mean, you can't really call this the first car, but it does feel like an ancestor to the first car for sure. Amazing how he drew something that looks centuries ahead of its time.

Starting point is 01:00:39 Looks more like a production guide for something being made in the late 19th century than a sketch someone thought up in the mid 15th century. In 1480, Leonardo paints Saint Jerome in the wilderness. It depicts Saint Jerome during his retreat to the Syrian desert, where he lived the life of a hermit. And where if Da Vinci's, Da Vinci's depiction is accurate, he also looked more like some kind of creepy golem from Lord of the Rings than he did like an actual human. I'm guessing this is the Da Vinci painting you at least want to hang in your bedroom if you hate

Starting point is 01:01:08 nightmares. In this painting, creepy ass St. Jerome kneeling in a rocky landscape, gazing towards a crucifix that can be discerned faintly sketched in the extreme right of the painting. In Jerome's right hand, he holds a rock with which he has traditionally shown beating his chest and penance, he holds a rock with which he has traditionally shown beating his chest and penance, sweet, not psychotic at all. At his feet as a lion, which became a loyal companion after he extracted the thorn from his paw. That part's sweet. I like that part of the story. Like the part of being friendly to the lion, way more than the beating his chest with a rock like a fucking cycle path. The lion, the stone, and a cardinal's hat are the traditional attributes of the saint. On the left side of the panel, the background is a distant landscape of the lakes, surrounded by mountains, surrounded by mist. To the right hand side, the only discernible

Starting point is 01:01:52 feature is a faintly sketched church, seen to the opening and some rocks. The church's presence, Mealou, just drums position in Western Christianity is one of the doctors of the church. Left unfinished, the painting provides visitors with extraordinary glimpse into a Leonardo's creative process as he moved from under drawing to the doctors of the church. Left unfinished, the painting provides visitors with extraordinary glimpse into a Leonardo's creative process as he moved from under drawing to the realization of forms and paint. The painting also preserves the imprint of the artist's fingers in the upper left corner.

Starting point is 01:02:14 1491, Da Vinci paints the adoration of the magi for the monks of San Donato, Scoperto, in Florence. Leonardo was given the commission by the Augustinian monks of San Donato, Scrapeto, in Florence. Leonardo was given the commission by the Augustinian monks of San Donato, Scrapeto, in Florence, but departed from Milan the following year, leaving the painting unfinished. As he, you're gonna find out, did often.

Starting point is 01:02:35 It has been New Featsick Gallery in Florence in 1670. I have left several voicemails offering to finish it myself for free, still waiting to hear back. Still hopeful. Still hopeful that I can get in there and do some stuff, do some doodling. The Virgin Mary and child depicted in the foreground of the painting, form a triangular shape with the magi, kneeling, and adoration. Behind them is a semi-circle of accompanying figures, including what may be a self-portrait of the young Leonardo in the far right. In the background on the

Starting point is 01:02:59 left is the ruin of a pagan building on which workmen can be seen apparently repairing it on the right or men on a horseback, fighting at a sketch of a rocky landscape. There's a lot going on. In the adoration of the Magi, Leonardo develops his pioneering use of the treatment of light and shade and drawing and painting, Chiaroscuro,

Starting point is 01:03:18 creating a seemingly chaotic mass of, you know, mass of people, plunge into darkness and confusion from which the Magi peer towards the brightly lit figures of Mary and Jesus. He was really good at like making like paintings seem just like 3D his use of, you know, how he drew light. Ah, the same year, most of the other note were the painters and florins were sent to Rome for work on projects for the Pope.

Starting point is 01:03:39 1482, Leonardo Mouss and Florence, to Milan entering into a long patronage he would have with a ludo, ludo vehicle,ico su forza the future Duke of Milan by this time Leonardo is riding in his notebooks on a regular basis. Da Vinci worked on many projects for the future Duke including the preparation of floats and pageants for special occasions. Yeah, he did fucking parades. Who knew? Designs for a dome for a Milan cathedral and a model for a huge equestrian monument to

Starting point is 01:04:04 Francesco suforza ludoovico's predecessor in 1482, who was meant to be the biggest horse statue in the world, 70 tons of bronze were set aside. 70 tons of bronze set aside for casting the monument known as Leonardo's horse. The monument remained unfinished for several years, which apparently again not unusual for Leonardo, dude did not have a problem walking away from a job. The bronze he was using for the statue was used several decades later for cannons to protect the city of Milan from the invasion of Charles, the fifth king of France. Between 1483 and 1485, Leonardo paints the first Madonna on the rocks.

Starting point is 01:04:38 The version of the rock, sometimes Madonna of the rocks, is the title of two different paintings with almost identical compositions, which were both at least largely painted by Leonardo da Vinci. One is in the Louvre in Paris, other is in the National Gallery in London, which I mentioned earlier. Most authorities agreed that the version Louvre is for the most part painted by Leonardo, and is the earlier of the two works,

Starting point is 01:04:58 the fine brush work, use of Chiescuro, Chiaro, Chiaro, Chicuro, considered characteristic of many of Leonardo's works. It's about eight centimeters taller than the London version. The first record of this picture is in 1625 when it was in the French royal collection. On April 25th, 1483, Leonardo and the brothers Ambrosio and Evangelista de Predis were commissioned by the Milanese co-ferentternity of the Immaculate Con to paint a work to celebrate in the immaculate conception for the new chapel The contract survives as does much of the documentation from later disputes over it now being finished got damn it Leonardo

Starting point is 01:05:34 Bucking Leonardo da Diva apparently They'd already they're already been a previous contract in 1480 with Giancomo del Mino Evidently the work was not completed. Among the work stipulated in the second contract was the completion and gilding of various carvings for the wooden framework of the altarpiece, none of which are known to survive. The three paintings were stipulated,

Starting point is 01:05:55 a central virgin and child in two side panels with angels described only in the earlier contract with Del Meno. These paintings also in the national gallery with different provinces from the main, God damn it. Fuck, too many words are, I was doing well for a while there, but every paragraph in this suck,

Starting point is 01:06:14 it's like, no, just back sweat. Provinces from the main were painted entirely by the brothers Dippetis, according to modern art historians and a contemporary statement by the brothers in the legal dispute. All the work was to be completed by the Feast of the Conception December 8th, 1483, but it didn't happen because DaVinci apparently had the sassy temperament of an NFL wide receiver.

Starting point is 01:06:35 Some later date the legal dispute began, the main issue being that the main painting was not finished. And Leonardo left Milan without Joe fucking doing that. Meanwhile, the Dupretis brothers completed their portion of the work. They wanted payment. The dispute was settled on April 27, 1506 with the requirement that Leonardo needed to return to Milan within two years, complete the painting, and then receive further sums beyond those in the original contracts.

Starting point is 01:06:59 So maybe he just wanted more money as it went along or something. And that appears to have happened. He appears to have got more money. Another sum was paid to him in 1507. In or around 1483, DaVinci sketches sketches the design for a parachute. It is no book. Again, DaVinci so far ahead of his time, this time was not the first time you come up with this idea though. Something that a form of primitive parachute was mentioned by Chinese texts 20 21 centuries ago. A conical parachute appears for the first time in the 1470s in an Italian manuscript,

Starting point is 01:07:28 slightly preceding Leonardo da Vinci's conical parachute designs. It was intended as an escape device to allow people to jump from burning buildings, but there was no evidence that it was actually ever used. Leonardo's parachute design consists of sealed linen cloth held open by a pyramid of wooden poles about seven meters long.

Starting point is 01:07:46 Along with the design, his notebook had an accompanying note that read, if a man is provided with a length of gummed linen cloth with a length of 12 yards or each side and 12 yards high, he can jump from any great height whatsoever without injury. Despite this confidence, no record of DaVinci trying it out. If you look, he's like, yeah, you just parachute. you can jump out of the window of a 10 square 10 square hour And there's no way you can get hurt go ahead go ahead and try it me Demonstrate and get the fuck out of here. I am a DaVinci. I don't even finish my art projects that have at the time But you want me to do the product demonstration a A shita. And that is for fucking the peasants.

Starting point is 01:08:25 Ah, so yeah, you do the next invention to come from DaVinci would be the first of many created for war. And let's go over these theoretical weapons right after today's final sponsor. Today's time. Sok is brought to you by the A whole Air Banjo Academy traditional Italian music master class limited time, special edition Forgotten works of DaVinci course. Don't push the lead. I know some of you hate the AirBangio so much

Starting point is 01:08:49 I just want to demonstrate how to play you know a song Recently rediscovered the DaVinci had you know, you know put together for the AirBangio Just just just just humor for just a bit for just a bit. 10 to 10, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down,

Starting point is 01:09:12 put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down,

Starting point is 01:09:20 down, put down, put down, put down, down, put down, put down, put down, put down, down, put down, put down, down, put down, put down, put down, put down, down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, put down, And of course I had another video to mention. It was an excuse to force some Mario Brothers theme song on you. Tinker, tinker, tinker, tinker. Tinker, tinker, tinker. Tinker, tinker, tinker, tinker. Tinker, tinker, tinker, tinker. Okay, now I'm really done. Now I'm really done.

Starting point is 01:09:33 Here we go! Really done now, don't leave me. Today's time suck is brought to you by Hello Fresh. America's number one meal kit. Yay delicious food. Did you like delicious food? Do you like delicious food? Do you like food that tastes like it's been scraped off some dirty asphalt?

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Starting point is 01:10:33 up the pork and poblano tacos. I'm not a great cook. Don't do it often, but thanks to very clear instructions and everything already be measured out. I knocked out that meal with ease and then made some stuff that looked and tasted like I ordered it from some kind of fancy taco joint. Perfectly seasoned pork. Wood for sure make again. Kiwi salsa, fancy. Like I would some kind of Hawaiian taco school.

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Starting point is 01:11:21 Link in the episode description. Now let's talk about some crazy ass, DaVinci weapons. 1485, plus possibly 1486 Leonardo gets into the missile launching business sketches a design for a giant crossbow, like a really big crossbow. The effort put into the design of the components indicates that he was striving to realize it as a workable weapon. The structure is huge. Its dimensions can be judged when comparing the machine to the drawing of a man who's operating it. The bow is to made a thin wood on six wheels, 27 yards across, made up of 39 separate parts. This giant crossbow were to be cranked with winding gears, had two different firing mechanisms, the simplest of which involved

Starting point is 01:12:00 releasing a holding pin by striking it with a mallet. If successfully built, it would have been able to shoot giant rocks, other huge projectiles very fast across the battlefield. Reminds me of how back into Plague Suck, we talked about launching Plague infected bodies through the air with the Trebuchet. What if you could shoot infected dudes across the battlefield with a giant crossbow? Load the Greg, aim the Greg, crossbow fire the Greg. I mean, can you imagine a giant crossbow fire the Greg. I mean, can you imagine a giant crossbow in the battlefield? I mean, they did already have cannons, but I think a giant crossbow way more intimidating.

Starting point is 01:12:32 That's like straight out of game of thrones. Like it's like one of those things you use to try and kill the dragons with. You know, what if you can make giant arrows, you know, just shoot them to the battlefield, like just just make a shish kabob of enemy dudes. What if the arrow was on fire? What if you can make a make a shish kabob of enemy dudes. One of the arrow was on fire. What if you could make a flaming human shish kabob?

Starting point is 01:12:48 It's good thing Vlad the impaler ruled a few decades before DaVinci and didn't get a hold of that weapon. Oh, he'd have been shish kabob and motherfuckers left it right for Vlokia. Also around 1425, Leonardo DaVinci sketched designs for some other vehicles of war. One idea was a siced chariot, my god.

Starting point is 01:13:06 This is some like grim reaper graphic novel type shit. The siced chariot was propelled by horses with a pillion rider and carried in front of it four sites mounted on a revolving gear, turned by a shaft driven by the wheels of a cart behind the horses. It was like having a chariot with a huge helicopter blade. Just out in front, if all the blades were essentially giant fucking swords, just four huge sword blades, spin

Starting point is 01:13:30 around, chop off people's arms and heads off and shit. Or malfunctioning and chopping off the horses head that was pulling the chariot or pulling the chopping off the head of the chariot driver. Leonardo did note this particular idea was maybe not his best. Maybe had the potential to do a lot of collateral damage. Probably best that one stays in no book. Leonardo also drew a sketch in a no book during this time about of what was basically a tank. Da Vinci's tank was said to be propelled or supposed to be propelled by two men powering

Starting point is 01:14:00 crank shafts, although the drawing itself looks quite finished. The mechanics weren't apparently fully developed because if built is drawn the tank with a lot of effort, it might be made to rotate on the spot. We've never progressed in a forward direction. But in a BBC documentary, it was such a good title, Leonardo, the man who wanted to know everything, a military team built the machine and just made one slight little tweak, found that they just had to change one of the gears and then it did actually work really well. These guys, you know, were moving around, one guy's, manning kind of the top part like the turret. There's a couple guys, you know, turning these gears,

Starting point is 01:14:36 making the tank actually move. Leonardo's notebooks also show cannons, which he claimed could hurl small stones like a storm with the smoke of these causing great terror to the enemy and great loss Confusion these little cannons would come out of the tank and an armored moving vehicle capable of shooting numerous projectiles If you sent those across the battlefield and you were shooting the enemy with a giant fucking crossbow I feel like psychological intimidation alone is gonna win you some battles and Enemies would just be so confused What is it? when you some battles. And enemies would just be so confused. And what is a decent, what do they think of they do in a, who's making a giant a gospel?

Starting point is 01:15:09 It's crazy. It's a make a man is a wica. It must be a warrior behind the decent. Maybe it's a bowser. I love that no one gets mad when you just do the most patronized and Italian accent, whatever. Da Vinci knew a lot about medieval warfare. Here's a quote that speaks to his military acumen.

Starting point is 01:15:28 He wrote, when a place is besieged, I know how to cut off water from the trenches and construct an infinite variety of bridges, mantlets, scaly ladders, other instruments pertaining to sieges. I also have types of mortars that are very convenient and easy to transport. When a place cannot be reduced by the method of bombardment, either because of its height or its location, I have methods for destroying any fortress or other stronghold, even if it would be founded upon rock. If the engagement be at sea, I have many engines of a kind, most efficient for offense and defense and ships that can resist cannons and power.

Starting point is 01:15:59 All right, then, my God. In addition to being a super talented and intelligent dude also had no shortage of confidence. Look, you had a divin, she got a win to battle, okay? It's as simple as that. You need a giant to fucking cross, boy, I got it, I got it. You want a tank? I got you a tank. Believe me, believe me, there are ways, dude. You want, you want to know about it? Believe me. Hey, I can get you a tank by three o'clock at this afternoon. You need a chair with a bunch of giant murder sites, spinning around cutting everything of Tushita?

Starting point is 01:16:27 I don't recommend it because it's very hard to control and dangerous, but I can do that. A rocket launcher is a laser gun and it's a tractor beam to nuke, cause what the fuck ever? I can do it all, baby. I'm a devinci. I can start as an hour. Sure, I'm in the middle of a few arts contracts at the moment, but I can wake away. I can walk away from that shit easy.

Starting point is 01:16:44 I don't think you're gonna fuck about to finish some paint at the moment, but I can wake away, I can walk away from that shit easy. I don't think you've got the fuck up about to finish in some pains at the angels and babies and shita, I do it all at the time. And yes, big Lebowski fans, I did try to snake a Walter parody in the middle of that. You wanna tell I can get you to buy noom? Or I wanna know, I can get you to buy three o'clock. Jesus Walter.

Starting point is 01:17:01 In 1425, a play took over Milan where Leonardo was living and working, Leonardo survived, but outbreaks of the disease killed some 50,000 people. A full third of the city's population and all these deaths inspired the Renaissance man to design concepts for a future city that he illuminated through a series of drawings and notations completed between 1487 and 1490, more on that in a second. In 1487, Leonardo would draw one of his most recognizable images. The iconic Vitruvian man.

Starting point is 01:17:28 It's accompanied by notes based on the work of Vitruvius, a first century BCE Roman military architect author and civil engineer, the drawing, which is an ink and which is an pen and ink on paper, depicts a male figure in two superimposed positions, with his arms and legs apart simultaneously inscribed in a circle and a square. The drawing and text are sometimes called the canon of proportions, or less often proportions of man, or stored in the gallery del academia, in Venice, Italy, and like most works on paper displayed only occasionally. The drawing is based on the correlations of ideal human proportions, with geometry described

Starting point is 01:18:03 by the ancient Roman Vitruvius. Vitruvius described the human figure as being the principal source of proportion among the classical orders of architecture. Other artists had attempted to depict the concept with less success, the drawing is traditionally named in honor of this architect. Leonardo's famous drawings of the Vitruvian proportions of a man's body first standing in the square and then with feet and arms outspread, inscribed in a circle, provide an excellent, early example of the way in which his studies are proportioned would fuse artistic and scientific objectives. It is Leonardo not for tributes, he points out that if you open the legs so as to reduce the stature by one-fourteenth and open and raise your arms so that the middle fingers touch

Starting point is 01:18:42 the lines, the top of the head, know that the center of the extremities of the outspread limbs will be the umbilicus and the space between the legs will make an equilateral triangle. And you know what? I understand all of that. Hey, sure, I do. Sure I do. I'm not dumb. I get it. I ain't agree. Yeah, I was thinking a lot of the same things when I looked at that. The biblical is, it got to be in the middle, you know I mean, and you got to have squares and triangles to make it all all work. That's not moving along. 1488 and response to the plague Leonardo finishes designs on that ideal city, I mentioned. The Renaissance concept of the ideal city expressed by Leonardo in his rigorously geometric urban planning, he envisioned two signature features of this future city, a network of canals that would support both commerce and better sanitation that would lead to less outbreaks of disease.

Starting point is 01:19:29 The vertical division of the city itself into as many as three different tiers, each for a different purpose. The radical vision essentially would have required either the founding of a brand new city, perfectly located on a site featuring large rivers or for an existing city to be entirely rebuilt. Not surprising that his city dream didn't went unrealized. Leonardo conceived a building as hydraulic machines, which distributed water in all the rooms of the house, as well as in the artesian workshops through a mechanical lifting system.

Starting point is 01:19:57 In the workshops, the energy released in this way was used to drive various types of machines. I mean, fuck, he basically was like trying to have a mechanical city way back in the 15th century. So cool that he was even just thinking about things like that. Always thinking, always dreaming. You know, the jokes may not have suited him, but I do think Da Vinci would like the spirit of Time Suck. Hail Da Vinci. Da Vinci's inventions continue. Between 1488 and 1489, Leonardo sketches the design for his first flying machine, and his fastness with flying Leonardo

Starting point is 01:20:28 attempted to combine the dynamic potential of the human body with an imitation of natural flight. And his notes, he cites bats, kites, and other birds as models to imitate. He even refers to his flying machine as the great bird. He wrote, an object offers as much resistance to the air as the air does to the object. You may see that the beating of its wings against the air supports a heavy eagle in the highest He wrote, these instances and the reasons given, a man with wings large enough and duly connected might learn to overcome the resistance of the air and by conquering it, succeed and subjugating

Starting point is 01:21:08 it and rising above it. Jesus! Yeah, he really was such a genius. Would that work? No, not that design, but it wasn't his final attempt at a flight machine. Sometime from 1488, 1490, Leonardo sketches the design for a double-decker bridge, which is surprisingly modern. It recalls the function of bridges and some modern metropolises where the two-way flow of traffic arranged on different levels. Leonardo doesn't mention what this project was actually for, but it is clear that it is a way of organizing the two circulation system in such a way that doesn't create traffic jams or obstructions.

Starting point is 01:21:40 While DaVinci was inventing cars, planes, tanks, bridges, and fucking cities, he was also still in depainting. Leonardo would paint his famous lady with an ermine from 429 to 1490, and ermine, by the way, is a cute little short-tailed white weasel. They're tiny, less than a pound. One of Leonardo's many notebooks was a companion of animals where he made notes about different species, and of the ermine, he wrote, themene out of moderation never eats but wants a day. And it would rather let itself be captured by hunters

Starting point is 01:22:08 than take refuge in a dirty layer in order not to stain its purity. And it has thought he included an image of this creature with the subject of the portrait identified as Cecilia Galerane to symbolize her purity, which is funny because this portrait is probably painted at a time when she was the mistress of the Duke of Milan, Leonardo was being paid to serve. So the purity of a mistress, slightly ironic.

Starting point is 01:22:33 The painting is one of only four female portraits painted by Leonardo, the other is being the Mona Lisa, the portrait of Gennie, God damn, that fucking genie is one of the, I said, the only word that comes up all the time, this sucks that I didn't look at the pronunciation for. Ginevere, back on whatever. Da Benshi and La Belle, long word. It is displayed by the, oh Jesus Christ. It is displayed by the Sartorisky Museum and Crackout Poland. And it has cited the Museum's Guide as the first truly modern portrait.

Starting point is 01:23:04 It's been in Poland since 1798. And if you're surprised, Poland has art, don't be. Remember Polish people can't read. So they love pictures. When I said, it's decided in the museum's guide as the first truly modern portrait a moment ago, I didn't mean it was written. I meant to Polish museum guide points at it and he else, that's a portrait of a lady. Davinci did it a long time ago. He yells at every 30 seconds and every two hours, he's given a part of a lady. Da Vinci did it long time ago. He yells at every 30 seconds and every two hours

Starting point is 01:23:27 he's given a sausage as a reward. I love you, Polish-huckers. And I love that as I make fun of you for your limitations, when I can barely say so many words in 1489, Da Vinci also planned a wedding. Was there nothing he couldn't do? Yes, Da Vinci not kidding. Da Vinci planned the wedding of Duke Giovanni, Galazio, with Ezabella, the Ergon in Milan,

Starting point is 01:23:48 and 429 on behalf of his patron, Ludovico Savos, that. I think I should say everything in weird accents, because then at least it sounds like I'm kind of saying, he's made it away, the Ergon in Milan, the Ergon in Milan, the Vickin in the Savos, that is the Duque Lombard, the Lombard, the Lombard, the Lombard, the Lombard, the Lombard, the Lombard, the Lombard, the Lombard, his production for the ceremony included a representation of heaven and the revolving planets. As the couple walked through the display,

Starting point is 01:24:10 each planet opened revealing a person dressed as the deity of each Jesus. Each person recited a bellow Cionic poem for the newlyweds and then he helped the planet even bigger Malon wedding in 1491 for the Duke himself. Not only did he create the menu, entertainment, decoration, he even designed what guests would wear, including their hats. It was based on dining room layout,

Starting point is 01:24:34 which was a one long table with diners all set on the same side on the style of the last supper painting. He may have also composed the music to be played at this wedding. The evidence of DaVci's composition abilities scarce, but he was in charge of the music at the wedding. It's believed he knew how to compose and he for sure did invent a new musical instrument in 1490.

Starting point is 01:24:53 Somewhere between 1488, 1489, Da Vinci sketched out designs for something called a Viola Organista. I guess it could have been 1490 as well. It was designed to use a friction belt to vibrate individual strings kind of like how violin produces sound. You press keys on a keyboard to select different strings, kind of like an organ.

Starting point is 01:25:14 It's a mix of piano and violin. It's not believed DaVinci ever built one, but Polish concert pianist and instrument builder Zlawomir Zubryski. I guess Polish people can do some pretty cool things. Did make one based on Dvence's designs in 2013, and I want you to hear this. Here is a sample of this man in 2013,

Starting point is 01:25:36 playing the strange and beautiful instrument that Dvence created five centuries previously. There was a few notations regarding lyrics, nothing full. We don't have anything unfortunately, like the full song, but there was a couple scribbles and I believe the word was supposed to be... I like it as spaghetti, I like it as lasagna, I like it as pizza pie, yeah. Nesta, I know that, I do know that. But how fucking cool is that sound? All of that noise from one instrument, it sounds so full.

Starting point is 01:26:35 Sounds like multiple to me, it sounds like multiple instruments are being played. Yeah, just an instrument built on plans over 500 years old. The Vinci's amazing brain kept being curious and inventive in the 1490s, around 1490, Leonardo sketched design for an adding machine, basically an old, early type of calculator in one of his journals. That particular journal would be lost until the 20th century.

Starting point is 01:26:57 What a cool discovery this is. February 13th, 1967, an amazing discovery was made by American scientists working in the National Library of Spain and Madrid. They had a chance upon two unknown works of Leonardo da Vinci, known as the Codex Madrid, 197 pages these guys found of Da Vinci notes that had just been lost in this giant library's vast inventory. I mean, turns out they weren't actually lost, they were just misplaced.

Starting point is 01:27:23 Like, how cool would it be to find that? Now, yeah, do you want to keep these two old notebooks of some doodles? Nah, throw them out. We don't have room. They say property of Leonardo DaVinci on the front. Nah, I don't throw them out. Those are worth like a million billion dollars each. French mathematician and inventor Blasé Pascal. He is credited with the AdiMachine in 1642, the first one. Diagrams and directions discovered for an even earlier Adi machine design, though, 1624, Wilhelm Schikard, designed a mechanical calculator, believed that two prototypes survived, although there were abouts remain unknown.

Starting point is 01:27:57 Leonardo's device was a lot like Pascal's Adi machine, and he came up with it now because these notebooks we know, over 150 years earlier and had DaVinci been able to implement this invention and so many others, he could have revolutionized the already innovative renaissance, so much further. He could have single-handedly advanced society in so many different ways, like centuries. My God, his work towards the goal of human flight continued in the 1490s. In 1493, Leonardo da Vinci sketches his design for his aerial screw. The world's first known design for a helicopter type device. Leonardo da Vinci credited with having first thought of a machine designed for vertical flight.

Starting point is 01:28:36 So he's like the guy who thought of the first helicopter-ish machine. The designs for Da Vinci's air screw dated 1493 again discovered in that Madrid library. So cool. I can't imagine finding a book like that in some old archives. It's fuck oak island. That is cool, Barry Treasurer. Way cooler to me than a big pile of gold, cooler than pirate treasure. And worth more than a bunch of gold. It's just cool that somebody else could find something in some monastery attic or a cubbent or, you know, I guess maybe some other library. Who knows what's out there? Anyway, this design consists of a platform surmounted by a helical screw driven by a somewhat

Starting point is 01:29:13 rudimentary system. Kind of like the rubber powered propeller of a model aircraft, like a kid's model aircraft. The gray genius wrote that if this instrument in the form of a screw was made of linen, the pores of which have been stopped with starch, it should, upon being turned sharply, rise into the air in a spiral. However, his design was never put into any practical use. So cool how we understood through his genius

Starting point is 01:29:35 and years of study, yet to be explained in scientific principles. I mean, in 1686, two full centuries later, Sir Isaac Newton would introduce his third law of motion, summarized as for every action in nature, there's an equal and opposite reaction. And Da Vinci's description of an object offering as much resistance to the air as the air does to the object tells me he understood this law perfectly.

Starting point is 01:29:55 1495 Da Vinci busy painting one of his most famous works, the last supper, the one author Dan Brown ruined from billions of paranoid people. This religious theme mural was created for his patron Duke Milan Ludwigos Svoreza last supper measures 15 feet by 29 feet covers the back wall of the dining hall at the UNESCO World Heritage Site in church The Santa Maria de la Grecia in Milan, Italy had no idea was that huge The theme was a additional one for communal eating halls, but Leonardo's talents gave it much greater realism and depth.

Starting point is 01:30:27 The arches above the main painting painted with the Savorosa Code of Arms, the opposite wall of the refractory, a refractory covered by a crucifixion fresco, painted by a much or less known Milan-based Renaissance artist, Giovanni Donato da Montorfano. Leonardo began work on the last supper in 1495, completed it in 1498. However, he did not work on the piece continuously throughout this period.

Starting point is 01:30:49 Of course, he didn't get in this whimsical son of a bitch, just kind of stepped away from things when he felt like it. As we learn in the Internet, lots of last-suffer paintings were commissioned during the Italian Renaissance. What makes Da Vinci's work so remarkable? Well, first, the disciples are all displaying very human, identifiable emotions. Leonardo's version was the first to depict real people, acting like real people. Secondly, the technical perspective, Davidine she displayed in the last summer,

Starting point is 01:31:14 set a new bar for art at the time. Every single element of the painting directs one's attention straight to the midpoint of the composition, Christ's head. To many respected art experts, the last supper is arguably the greatest example of one point perspective ever created, like ever. And if I had, you know, I've even heard of one point perspective before, I would probably agree, but my art knowledge is limited. But like, I guess I could be like, yeah, fuck it, fuck it, fuck it, yeah, I know. This is the best. I get it. You know, it's cool. I think it's cool, he didn't use stick figures. I'd be the worst art, you know, tour guy.

Starting point is 01:31:46 Yes, this guy faces look cool. And, you know, I like the colors. And it's good size. I like, I like bigger painting. This guy was known for like bigger things. And that's why he was more famous. And he liked, look at the blue, that's fucking cool shit. Anyway, A plus for art.

Starting point is 01:32:03 Some were started in 1495, Leonardo also paints the second of his Madonna on the rocks. Dude, love Madonna's. And he love rocks. A lot of people don't know that about Leonardo. He's a big rock guy. If I was given the tour, I would include that too. I'd be like, yes, painted the Madonna on the rocks

Starting point is 01:32:19 because you know, he had a heart on for rocks. You know what I mean? Rocks, guys, rocks off. Anyway, let's move it along. The second version of the rocks is the National Gallery of London. And we mentioned that one as well earlier. 1498, the Italian mathematician and Francis Confriar, a celibate member of the Catholic religious order

Starting point is 01:32:37 founded by St. Francis of a CC, Luca Paciole, who's called the father of a countenance bookkeeping, composed a book called De Divina Proposione on the divine proportion, which was illustrated by our buddy, Leonardo da Diva da Vinci. The title of the book refers to the golden ratio. What does that mean? Does it have to do with golden showers? Does it tell you not to disparage us before you give a golden shower?

Starting point is 01:33:01 Is that rude? Should you be extra hydrated for golden shower? Should you take a regular shower before you're given someone a golden shower? And should they probably shower after receiving your shower? Should you probably never talk about any of this? Should you probably never do it? Sprite it unhealthy. The golden ratio has nothing to do,

Starting point is 01:33:14 thank God it was golden showers. In the golden ratio, A plus B is to A as A is to B. The golden ratio is a special number found by dividing a line into two parts. So it's a longer part divided by the smaller part is equal to the whole length divided by the longer part, often symbolized by using phi, some nice pronounced phi, the 21st letter of the Greek alphabet. Why is it important?

Starting point is 01:33:37 Well some of the arise that many of the Nardos paintings employ the golden ratio in ways that give his work perspective that our brains naturally identify is looking better, like more perfect somehow. He was using math to trick our minds into finding more beauty in his work. You know, he was just using some kind of scientific whiz or tricks. It's kind of like how babies are more drawn to faces that are more symmetrical than those that aren't. They've done studies that are proven at, or like how adults tend to find more symmetrical faces, more attractive.

Starting point is 01:34:08 Kind of like how banana peels are way sexier looking, you know, than other fruit. You know, forget about that last example. What I was trying to say is that whether we are conscious of it or not, we do seek out and appreciate balance. And Leonardo knew that and he knew how to incorporate, you to incorporate certain mathematic principles into his work. However, saying that most art historians don't think he did it to the level some people do. They don't think he used the golden ratio in his art as much as others. But it's part of the legend. So Nimrod wills me to include it in telling it to you. 1499. Get back on track.

Starting point is 01:34:45 French army invades Milan, Leonardo Leaves. They should have built his tanks. Should have made some of his giant crossbows. Duke Svorsa was overthrown, which leaves now 47-year-old Leonardo without a patron. He traveled around Italy for a while, maybe snuck in a little Saudi on the down low, some speculate.

Starting point is 01:35:01 You know, you gotta have some kind of romantic life, right? Maybe, maybe not. Then landed in Mantua before eventually returning to Florence. While in Mantua, DaVinci draws the portrait and profile of Isabella de Estes. This famous drawing is a sketch for a portrait that was never painted. Despite its fragile state of conservation, it is said to be one of Leonardo's finest head and shoulders portraits. It is also the only known drawing by the master highlighted

Starting point is 01:35:25 with several colored pigments. It offers cool inside as well to his portrait process, starting with the detailed sketch before moving into the actual paint. Starting in 1499, Leonardo draws the Virgin and Child with St. Anne and St. John the Baptist. The Virgin and Child with St. Anne and St. John the Baptist, sometimes called the Burlington House cartoon

Starting point is 01:35:43 is a full-size cartoon done by Leonardo da Vinci. And I have such, I feel like, hopefully I'm doing this episode justice. I have such little artistic education. Like I've always loved it. I've always loved paintings specifically. Don't know fucking shit about them. How to make them. The background of most artists.

Starting point is 01:36:02 When I first came across the words Burlington House cartoon, I'm not saying this for a joke. I actually thought he drew some cartoons. I thought he made some Da Vinci cartoons, like some kind of medieval version of Sunday paper funnies, like with little like word bubbles and everything. I was like, I didn't know that, that's cool. Like maybe the Burlington House was just a place for a bunch of wacky Renaissance,

Starting point is 01:36:23 Bachelors lived, big goofy grins, googly eyes. You know, some bearded artist guy, you know, some frame, walks up to the Burlington House, all beat up and bruised, soaking wet. And she said, I thought that you would yield a killer to gota, but she said killer to gota. And that's a way of we clasped into the DACA. Everybody laughs in the next frame.

Starting point is 01:36:44 Some horny old man from upstairs window just, ah Leonardo, you always know how to make a delinquent. Everybody laughs in the next frame, except for some lady who's all fucking soaked and miserable from, you know, wrecking on a boat. I didn't say he was gonna do a good cartoon. That's just where my mind went. No, in the context of Renaissance paintings,

Starting point is 01:37:01 a cartoon refers to a full-scale preparatory drawing for a fresco, oil painting or a tapestry. The word we used today comes from Italian cartone, which simply means a large sheet of paper or a card. So, bummer, you didn't do a cartoon. The Berlin Canal's cartoon combines two popular themes in Florentine painting in the 15th century, the Virgin Mary and the child will say,

Starting point is 01:37:21 Baptists or say, same Baptists, St. John the Baptist, and the Virgin and a child with St. Baptist or St. Baptist, St. John the Baptist and the Virgin and a child with St. Anne currently hangs the National Gallery in London. There's a subtle interplay between the gazes of the four figures with St. Anne smiling in her daughter Mary while Mary's eyes are fixed on her son as are St. John's. There is little in the way of clear delineation between the four bodies, the heads of the two women in particular look like the growths on the same body.

Starting point is 01:37:44 St. Anne's enigmatic gesture of pointing her index finger towards the heavens recurs in two Leonardo's last paintings, his Saint John the Baptist and Bacchus, and is regarded as the quintessential Leonardo-esque gesture. The drawing in charcoal and black and white chalk covers eight sheets of paper glued together, unusual for a cartoon. The outlines have never been pricked or incised, indicating that the stage of transferring the design to the panel that would be painted on was not reached.

Starting point is 01:38:11 The works titled The Broding Toss Cartoon refers to its home at the Royal Academy until 1962, when it was put on sale for 800,000 pounds, which is crazy for like a very unfinished work. Yeah, yeah, went for that much. In 1987, The Broding Toss Cartoon was was attacked and an active vandalism was shot off shotgun. The blast cost significant damage, despite not fully penetrating the canvas after shattering

Starting point is 01:38:31 the glass covering, but as since been restored, the shooter was Robert Cambridge, who claimed he committed this act in order to bring attention to political, social and economic conditions in Britain. He did not. He did it because he was extremely mentally ill. Speaking of guns, Leonardo may have drawn up designs for the world's first machine gun, at least the first drawing of a machine gun, around 1500 CE, DaVinci sketched in one of his notebooks that designed for what can only be called a machine gun. Leonardo also wanted to increase, he wanted to increase the rate of bullets that could be fired at one time. So he designed machines

Starting point is 01:39:03 with multiple cannons so they could be fired successively or all together. He ended up drawing two different machine gun type designed illustrating weapons that use racks of 11 or 14 different guns. While the top row is being fired, the next rack was loaded. Simultaneously, a third rack could be cooling off. Another design had the guns and the triangles spread out for greater distribution of their projectiles. By 15, you know, Tudor Lee and Arda would find a new job and become Cesare. But Jada is the head military engineer, the head military engineer in Romania, former province in Northern Italy, artist wedding planner, musical insert inventor, inventor of so many other things. He could, he could use, he probably could have juggle 47 balls at one time if he

Starting point is 01:39:44 was live the gay to be people magazine sexism and life you probably be able to hit a receiver mid-striered to a football three hundred yards and is dick probably saying beautiful opera songs when it came i just finish i just finish i just finish now i go into sleep that would be what the north is dick would say uh... lean are would travel around the region

Starting point is 01:40:05 expecting fortifications on behalf of, you know, or for his new job. Cesare, Patracha was sort of a big deal to himself, by the way. I'm just laughing at all these fucking words. A lot of these episodes, when they get us on paper, when I'm going over, I'm in preparation, just so you know my preparation process, I have all these pronunciation notes all over.

Starting point is 01:40:25 And I'm like, yeah, I fucking got this. It's gonna be so easy. I'll say a few sentences here and there out loud. Yeah, I got this. And then I go to record my brain's like, yeah, good luck, dummy. And it's just like, God dammit. 25,000 words.

Starting point is 01:40:39 And about 10 is today's episode, honestly. Over, over 25,000 words. And it feels like 10,000 of them are just like, oh, no. Shazada, Borja, was sort of a big deal myself. Borja was Duke of Valentinois, was an Italian military leader plus a nobleman, politician and cardinal. Borja also is happy to be the son of Pope Alexander the six

Starting point is 01:41:03 and his long-term mistress Cesada, Borgia fights his fight for power be to major inspiration from Machiavelli's I like that word Great work to Prince while working for Borgia Leonardo built the canal from Susena to the porto fucking something Porto Cezanatico this canal still exists. It's the only This can also exist. It's the only, it's used daily in the town of Ramania. Speaking of Machiavelli, there was a time when Da Vinci and Machiavelli would put their great minds together and plot the Steeler River.

Starting point is 01:41:33 Leonardo da Vinci was residing at Borges Court when the great Nicolò Machiavelli came to visit, they gifted author, poet, philosopher, playwright, father of modern political science and more. Another brilliant Renaissance man, Machiavelli is the man behind the term Machiavelli. An adjective meaning cunning, scheming, and unscrupulous, especially in politics or advancing one's career. Da Vinci, Machiavelli, 502, 503, working together to do some shady shit. They hatch a brilliant scheme to make Florence rich and screw over Florentine rival city

Starting point is 01:42:03 state, Pisa, once and for all. They actually try to steal the river Arno. But I think it's amazing. Fuck a bank heist. They try a river heist. The river Arno was the main water source for both Florence and pizza by stealing the Arno, Machiavelli and DaVinci hoped to not only deprive pizza

Starting point is 01:42:20 of the ability to grow their own crops, bathe and stay alive, but also to better irrigate the farmlands of Florence and turn a profit by selling the water to local farmers. Additionally, the water would be diverted into a series of canals that would make it possible for ships to sail from Florence out to the Mediterranean, very ambitious plan. Stealing the Arna would spell wells for Florence and would spell death for Pisa. I feel like the phrase, go big or go home was written about Da Vinci. Dude went

Starting point is 01:42:45 real big with some of his designs and plans and they actually set out to make this happen. DaVinci gleefully set about making plans and involved tunneling under a mountain, moving millions of tons of dirt and it would require 50,000 workers. Leonardo proposed a construction of one wide channel deeper than the Arno itself, which when combined with a dam would divert the entirety of the river away from Pisa and into some nearby marshland. The channel was intended to be 80 feet wide at its mouth, 64 feet wide at its end, 30 feet deep in a mile long. Big project. And they did give it a go. Once Machiavelli signed off on the idea, DaVinci's plans went to an engineer named Colambino, who frankly just wasn't smart enough to, you know, carry out Da Vinci's vision.

Starting point is 01:43:30 Instead of digging one massive trench per Da Vinci's plan, Da Vinci, Colambino decided it was easier to build two shallow trenches and let the river erode into one of them or rode them into one canal. Colambino also underestimated the amount of time and time he would need to build these two canals. Bucking Colambino! I knew I didn't like that asshole. Now I know why. Kalimino also underestimated the amount of time and men he would need to build these two canals. But can Kalimino? I knew I didn't like that asshole. Now I know why.

Starting point is 01:43:48 Kalimino construction plans fails. Yeah. The Arnold destroys his two canals and more or less the river stays on its natural course. Machiavelli and DaVinci partways never attempting to revisit this insane project again. While planning that river diversion, Leonardo also, you know, no big whoops, designed several machines, just invented several new things to help make digging and moving easier. Guys just showing off this point, but I just think that's amazing. Like what if they would have done that?

Starting point is 01:44:11 What if they would have pulled that off? You know, down there in pizza and all of a sudden, you just river goes dry, you're like, what the fuck? And you go up there, up to the V&G, he stole his river. Ah, he's a work on what the bow is at. Uh, in or around 501 or 502, in order to eventually made a sketch of a giant single span bridge that was to be built, be built over the golden horn,

Starting point is 01:44:35 a natural inlet of the blast, blasts for a straight to divide in the city of Constantinople, present day instamble. It was to be part of a civil engineer project for Sultan by Zed the second. Everyone wanted peace of this guy's brain. The massive bridge was to be 72 feet wide 24 meters, 1080 foot total length 360 meters, 120 feet, 40 meters above the sea level at the highest point of the span. This would be the first time in history that such a long single span bridge had ever been proposed.

Starting point is 01:45:01 The construction methods needed to build such a structure wouldn't even come into existence for another 300 years. Consequently, the bridge could not be built because it was just too advanced for the builders of the time to carry out his vision. For 500 years, Leonardo's graceful design remained in obscure, tiny drawing in the corner of one of his, you know, many notebooks until 1966 when a contemporary norweg Norwegian artist, Viburene Sond saw the drawing and an exhibition of one of Leonardo's engineering designs, or some of them. Sond was impressed by it, so impressed,

Starting point is 01:45:34 by when he returns Oslo, he proposes that the Norwegian public roads undertake the construction of this project. For the next few years, Viburene Sond devoted his time and effort to transform the Leonardo bridge project from a dream into a reality. And in 2001, a small pedestrian footbridge based on Leonardo's original design was built near the town of Funny Letter AS in Norway on Highway E18 linking Oslo in Stockholm. Leonardo's Golden Home Bridge design is a perfect pressed bow.

Starting point is 01:46:03 Leonardo's surmised correctly that the classic keystone arch could be stretched narrow and substantially widened without losing integrity by using a flared foothold or pier and the terrain to anchor each end of the span. Again, amazingly, this was conceived by this dude 300 years prior to its engineering principles being generally accepted. I mean, you can see why the ancient astronaut theorists love DaVinci. I mean, if DaVinci could have cloned himself, he could have moved the world forward a few hundred years in a crazy amount of ways.

Starting point is 01:46:30 In 1503, Leonardo does some more painting and Florence, September on October 503, he's commissioned to paint the mural of the Battle of N. Geati and the Reese, got that one. And the Reese can be built, great counsel call of the Pilotsovic, you fucking nailing it now. And Florence, during the first years of the city's Republican government he would finish this ambitious and reportedly difficult project in 1505 the battle of the njody sometimes referred to as the last Leonardo some commentators believe it's still hidden beneath later frescoes in the hall of 500 in the platzo vequeo It's central scene depicted three men riding raging war horses engaged in battle for, for something, uh, engaged battle.

Starting point is 01:47:09 Well, future technology allowed art historians to find it. And if it's there, remove paintings placed on top of it without damaging it, time will tell. If DaVinci himself lived today, he probably already had to figure out a 1503. Also, the year that Leonardo finishes the most famous painting on earth Thomas can Kade's a peaceful retreat. Wait, I mean, fan goes story night. No, I mean the Mona Lisa also known as Lajon can't La ja canta Lajon, Lajon fucking something Mona Lisa, it's also known as the Prince of the Peach.

Starting point is 01:47:45 She's the beautiful lady. The Mona Lisa owned by the government of France and is on the wall in the Louvre in Paris with the title, Porto de Lisa, Giacarandini, wife of Francisco, Del Jacando. The painting is half length Porto, the depicts a woman whose expression is often described as enigmatic, the ambiguity of the sitter's expression, the monumentality of the half figure composition,

Starting point is 01:48:08 the subtle modeling of forms and atmospheric illusionism were novel qualities that have contributed to the paintings' continuing fascination. Few other works of art have been subject to so much scrutiny, study, mythologizing, conspiracies, and parody. Historian Donald Sassoun cataloged the growth of the paintings fame. During the mid 1800s, theophile Gutierre and the romantic poets were able to write about Mona Lisa as a femme fatale because Lisa was an ordinary person. Mona Lisa was an open text into which one could read that one wanted or what one wanted, probably because she was not a religious image and probably because the literary gaysers

Starting point is 01:48:42 were mainly men who subjected her to an analyst's dream of male fantasies. So sound like some guys were jerking off to Mona Lisa, which is hard to imagine today. She doesn't exactly who sex appeal, but I guess, you know, be disney out of the beholder. The painting really became famous in 1911 when an Italian handyman named Vincenzo Parugia, stole her from the Louvre. Vincenzo was the guy who helped construct the paintings glass case and he stole this painting by walking in the museum during regular hours, hiding in a broom closet, and then just walking the fuck out.

Starting point is 01:49:11 When the painting, you know, or after hours, with the painting hidden under his coat, simple and genius. Last week, suck character Jesse James would have approved. Or maybe not. Maybe, you know, maybe it would have been too sneaky for him. Maybe Jesse James would have wrote up guns drawn, shot anyone, refused, and given the painting and self-defense. Perguilla was an Italian patriot who believed that Leonardo's paintings should have been

Starting point is 01:49:30 returned to an Italian museum. He was also just a guy who wanted to make a ton of money selling it. I think the second part was his primary motivation. He hit the painting and his department for two years while the world looked for it and then Mona Lisa's fame grew. Then he got caught trying to sell it to the Eufizi Gallery in Florence. From December 1962 to March 1963, the French government lent it to the United States to be displayed in New York City, Washington, DC in 1974, and then the painting was exhibited in Tokyo and Moscow after that. Between before the 1962-1963 tour,

Starting point is 01:50:00 the painting was assessed for insurance purposes as being valued at 100 million. No one really knows how much the painting is worth, but in 2014, a French TV station suggested it could be sold to ease the French national debt, and it was speculated to be valued at two and a half billion dollars. Wow. And by the way, no one really knows who Mona Lisa was. She's thought to be a young, foreign teen woman,, Manna Armona Lisa, who in 1495 married Francesco Del Jocando, a wealthy silk merchant, and thus came to be known as La Jocanda. Okay, I think

Starting point is 01:50:33 I got it this time. On July 9th, 1504, the age of 77, Sapiero, Leonardo's father dies. Sapiero died. We'll work in his notary in Florence. No big burial or funeral for him that we know of. No records that have been found. So Leonardo, you know, may not have attended. Because Leonardo was not directly a part of the family, he gained nothing in the inheritance, did DaVinci, have some kind of falling out with his dad, always had his side and his dad past, just wasn't recorded. We don't know.

Starting point is 01:50:59 Again, DaVinci wrote next to nothing about his private life. And the ballpark of 1505 Leonardo makes an attempt to build another fly machine by about 1505, 53-year-old Leonardo had been thinking about how to fly for roughly 20 years. Some think he built a complex ornithopter, a machine with flapping wings to closely mimic the anatomy of birds in 1505. No one really knows if Leonardo actually built a model of and tested his ornithopter or not, but it's fun to imagine him giving it a go. A years later in 1551 of his associates, Cardenas, did write that his teacher tried in vain

Starting point is 01:51:31 to get an ornithopter off the ground. So I guess there's a possibility that the Renaissance man, you know, took his machine out for a few disastrous spins. In May of 1506, Leonardo was summoned by two Milan by Charles de Amboise, the French governor, and in 1507, Leonardo's appointed French king Louis XII painter and engineer. May of 1506 Leonardo is summoned by two Milan by Charles de Amboise, the French governor and in 1507 Leonardo's appointed French king Louis XII painter and engineer in 1508. Leonardo da Vinci paints the Virgin and child with St. Ann and Lamb, a famed psychiatrist Sigmund Freud would later see all kinds of symbolism hidden in this painting, claiming

Starting point is 01:51:59 to see a vulture hidden in the painting that somehow represented Da Vinci's passive homosexuality. When I look at it, I see a hidden donut, which represents my current attempt to get back in a low carb diet after eating several donuts last week and really wanting more donuts this week. And donuts make me feel happy when I get sad about not being able to say stuff. In 15 to 10, 15 to 11, Leonardo DaVinci collaborates with Renaissance Professor of Anatomy, Marc Antoneo, Delatore, who lectured the University of Papia, University of Padua, on a work of theoretical anatomy. As an artist, Leonardo was a master of topographic anatomy, drawing many studies

Starting point is 01:52:35 of muscles, tendons, other visible anatomical features. He was given permission to dissect human corpses at the hospital of Santa Maria and the Weva, and Florence, and later at hospitals in Milan and Rome, together with Marc Antonio, Dato Torre, he prepared a theoretical work on anatomy for which Leonardo made more than 200 drawings, published only in 1680, 161 years after his death, under the title Treet-C on Painting.

Starting point is 01:52:59 Its purpose was to teach art students how to draw more realistic human and animal figures by understanding the organs, muscles, bones, and everything, tendons that lie beneath our skin. Leonardo drew many studies of the human skeleton, and its parts as well as muscles and sinews, the heart and vascular system, the sex organs, other internal organs, he even made one of the first scientific drawings of a fetus and utero. As an artist, Leonardo closely observed and recorded the effects of age and of human emotion on the physiology studying in particular the effects of rage.

Starting point is 01:53:30 He also drew many figures who had significant facial deformities or signs of illness. He also drew a study to drew the anatomy of many other animals as well dissecting cows, birds, monkeys, bears, and frogs comparing in his drawings their anatomical structure with that of humans. Also made a number of studies of horses. This book now exists at the Elmer Belt Library, UCLA and Los Angeles. Elmer Belt pying near and sex reassignment surgery and collector of everything to Vinci. He could get his hands on and afford. Leonardo da Vinci paint St. John de Baptist in 1515 when he's 63 in oil painting on walnut

Starting point is 01:54:03 and wood or a walnut wood, believed to be Da Vinci's last painting. It's a 69 by 57 centimeters little guy. It's a little guy. It's now exhibited at the Louvre in Paris. This piece depicts St John the Baptist in isolation, St John dressed in peltz, long curly hair, smiling in an in an in an inigmatic in, ah, Jesus in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, in, invedere in the Vatican in Rome, where Raphael and Michelangelo were both active, pretty sweet, just three teenage mutant individuals chilling in the Vatican. No big whoop.

Starting point is 01:54:49 Just three of the greatest artists of all time shooting the shit. That's all. Also in 1515, France is the first takes a throne in France and on December 1915, 1515, Leonardo meets with France as the first and Pope Leo the 10th. So you know, it's kind of famous in shit, kind of a big deal. Beading up with the king, you know, France and the Pope, having some wine, some cheese, taking the beans out, measuring them, making the guy with the smallest one, running naked lap around the palace, just pros being bros. Following year France is the first commission's

Starting point is 01:55:14 divinity to build a robot, not kidding. He wanted a robot lion, or at least a mechanical one, so he asked the greatest wizard alive to make it for him. And then Leonardo did indeed build a mechanical lion for the coronation of the New King of France. He built this mechanical line with the ability to walk and upon reaching his destination, open a compartment in his fully automated chest, revealing a floored elite, a stylized lily in honor of the French monarchy. Unsurprisingly, the line was lost or destroyed at some point in history. God, bummer. In 2009, another mechanical tinker named Renato Brato, Brato, Brato, drew inspiration from DaVinci's line, made his own version based on DaVinci's plans, which walked, swayed his tail, moved his jaws, had a secret compartment that opened the, uh, to reveal a floretyly. I mean,

Starting point is 01:56:04 I mean, sweet, no wonder. Some people think this guy was in the Illuminati. He made a walking robot line in 1515. I watched a video of the replica walk around and it's fucking mind blowing. It's like the biggest, most elaborate kids wind up until you've ever seen. Guess in the King of France was more than a little impressed.

Starting point is 01:56:19 In 1516, he gives DaVinci use of a manor house near the King's own royal residence at the Chateau Ambois. In DaVinci spends the last three years of his life living here in luxury on a comfortable stipend accompanied by his friend at apprentice, 25-year-old Count Francisco Melise. Francisco Melise, while not well known, would go on to be a badass artist of his own

Starting point is 01:56:39 after DaVinci's death, returning to Italy, getting married and having eight kids. And then Leonardo DaVinci dies on May 2nd, 1519, the age of 67. King Francis I become a close friend. The famous artist and historian, Joe Giordo Fassotti, records that the king held Leonardo's head in his arms as he died, although the story may be more legend than fact. I'm going to choose to believe it because I really like it. In his last days, Leonardo sent for a priest to make his confession

Starting point is 01:57:05 and to receive the Holy Sacrament. He was buried at the chapel of St. Huber in the Chateau de Ambois that was unfortunately demolished in the early 19th century. An excavation decades later turned up bones that were believed to be Leonardo's. An inscription notes carefully that the site holds the artist's presumed remains. Da Vinci's pupil, Francisco Medelliz,

Starting point is 01:57:25 the only of Da Vinci's students to stay with him until death, was the principal heir and executor receiving his money, final paintings, tools, library and other personal effects. And his death, Leonardo did also remember other long time pupil and companion, Salai, and his servant, Batista, that they, Veluzis, who each received

Starting point is 01:57:43 half of Leonardo's vineyards, and some of his half brothers did receive some land. Well, he never really wrote about him again. Again, so little is not about his private life. He did have nine half brothers and three half sisters. We don't know how close he was to any of them. Finally, a serving woman received a single black cloak.

Starting point is 01:57:56 I'm guessing there's a story behind that that we'll never know. It might be a dumb story. You know, she might have just made one comment about it. I just thought it was a sweet coat. And it was the day he happened to be right in his will. And he's like, ah, fuck it, I'll give it to you. Upon DaVinci's death, his contemporary, another Renaissance man named Benavinuto, Selene,

Starting point is 01:58:13 who was an Italian goldsmith, sculptor, draftman soldier, musician, artist, and author, Settelian Ardo. There had never been another man born in the world who knew as much as Leonardo. And I think that's enough for today's time suck timeline. Good job, soldier. You've made it back. Barely. What a life, my God. The legacy of Leonardo Motherfucking Da Vinci insanely vast

Starting point is 01:58:45 from the world's most renowned painter to an inventor hundreds of years ahead of his time to a military strategist who plotted to steal a river and could have quite possibly pulled it off the guy truly one of the world's great geniuses. Let's just list some of this guys interest real quick. Scientists, mathematician, engineer, inventor, anatomist, painter, sculptor, architect,

Starting point is 01:59:07 wedding planner, musician, teacher, robot lion maker, wizard, time traveler, ninja, juggler, model, train enthusiast, civil war reenactor, film director. He started in season two of Stranger Things, play the giant monster. Not sure about those last few, but it seems possible. How the hell do you do all that? Well, you didn't have kids get married. That's how. I think that's the real lesson today. If you want to accomplish something great, you see that keep your dick out of a genus or you got to keep your vagina free of dicks. You know, if I didn't have kids, if I didn't

Starting point is 01:59:36 have wife, I could say every word perfectly. No, that's not the real lesson. That's not the real lesson at all. But leading what seemed like a solitary life did allow him to, you know, follow his artistic whims a little easier. The real lesson, I think, is if you want to accomplish all that Leonardo did, you've got to be curious, you've got to be real curious, you've got to be willing to take risks, you've got to work really, really hard, be taught by the best, be born in the right place at the right time in the right situation with the right parents and have what may have been, you know, the highest IQ of all time. You know, in short, in short, look at Leonardo's, you know, life.

Starting point is 02:00:05 We barely had time to look into the highly scientific mind of this incredible man. As a scientist, he greatly advanced the state of knowledge in the fields of anatomy, civil engineering, optics, hydrodynamics, as well as outline a rudimentary theory of plate tectonics. He covered so much shit today and he did so much more. Maybe in the most diversely talented human to ever live. As an engineer, his ideas were vast yet at their time, you know, conceptualized tanks. Some say cars, concentrated solar power, a calculator, the submarine, the double hole,

Starting point is 02:00:32 a number of flying machines like gliders and helicopter, inventing the first practical ball bearings, relatively few of his designs were ever constructed or were even feasible to construct during his lifetime. Some of the smaller inventions such as an automated Bob and Winder, a machine for testing the tensile strength of wire, did enter the world of manufacturing. In 2016, time researchers used historic records to identify 35 living descendants of Leonardo, only on his father's side. Those living relatives include Oscar nominated a time director Franco Zephyr Lini. Zephyrili? Perhaps most famous for his 1968 film adaptation of Romeo and Juliet.

Starting point is 02:01:09 I haven't looked into it, so I'm gonna assume maybe I'm another descendant. My 23-year-old's do include 0.6% of me being brother European, so maybe I like to think that I did inherit his little-known talent for being able to have cartoonish accents. It's Tamia, Leonardo da Vinci. I like to make a lot of things.

Starting point is 02:01:30 I like to make a lion, a demonet Lisa. I make so many of the skillables. I make a spaghetti, I make a pizza pie, I save the pizzas from the Bowser. Let's go now to the top of 5 and take the ways. I'm trying to go higher, but foot's a water let me. Time suck. Top five take away. Number one despite all of the many, many talented Davinci his paintings are what he's best remembered for. Debates still rage on 500 years after Davinci's death over which the surviving paintings are actually Davinci's works. Too many collaborations. Even the Salvatore Monday, not considered a true Da Vinci by some respected experts on

Starting point is 02:02:08 Renaissance art, still sold for almost half a billion dollars because it might be Da Vinci's work. Number two, many of Da Vinci's sketches and inventions were designed for military use even though few made it to the battlefield, from armor tanks, giant crossbows, and you know, multi-canon-type devices. Leonardo was constantly creating new ways to kill a meat sack. Number three, DaVinci was obsessed with flight.

Starting point is 02:02:30 No one knows if you ever succeeded in taking flight, but his aerial screw gliders and ornithopter were sweet fucking attempts, especially for someone who lived over 500 years ago. I can't even make a decent paper airplane. Always end up with one tiny wing and one kind of big clunky wing, and they really make it across through and they usually just kind of spin down to the floor. Da Vinci could probably make a paper airplane that could fly, you know, clear across the Midwest in one shot. You can probably have passengers on it. Number four, Da Vinci was

Starting point is 02:02:56 a bastard. Literally, his mother may have been a slave. He was born in a good time to be a bastard, but still I love that despite having a wealthy father, his story still feels like the story of an underdog. Makes it a pinch more inspiring. Hail the underdog, praiseable jangles are very own underdog. And number five, new info. Let's look at two more sweet inventions I didn't mention. First how about a military diving suit designed hundreds of years before modern scuba gear.

Starting point is 02:03:19 While working in Venice, the water city and 1500 DaVinci designed scuba gear for sneak attacks on enemy ships. The leather diving suit was equipped with a bag-like mask that went over the diver's head. Attached to the mask around the nose area where two cane tubes led up to a cork diving bell floating on the surface. Air was provided for the opening of the tubes to the diver below. The mask also was equipped with a valve operated balloon that could be inflated or deflated so the diver could more easily service or sink.

Starting point is 02:03:46 Additionally, Leonardo da Vinci's scuba gear invented and incorporated a pouch for the diver to urinate it. Da Vinci's idea for scuba gear didn't become well known until his famous, famous codex Atlanticus, 12 volumes set up his drawings and notes published after his death or found. Wasn't until the middle of the 20th century that Jacques Castó, an engineer, Amille Gagnan invented the aquelong or modern scuba suit. So many of DaVinci's inventions were so far ahead of his time, but it's designed for a humanoid robot might have been the most futuristic.

Starting point is 02:04:18 DaVinci invented a robotic knight that could wave its arms, move its neck, even open and close its mouth. The strange doll was controlled externally by cables operate with a hand crank as well as by an internal gear driven ancient machine. About 450 years after DaVinci designed his robotic knight, his detailed sketches of the inventions were rediscovered. This contraption made from a suit of armor packed with springs, gears, pulleys could reportedly sit, stand, walk and raise its arms.

Starting point is 02:04:44 Mark Roshim, a roboticist who has built robotic systems for NASA, heard of it, Lockheed Martin, okay, where, where, where? Built a working model of DaVinci's robotic night in 2002. Mark Roshim research, research Leonardo's robot obsessively because certain robotic pieces like the wrist joints are very difficult to build today and they were so well designed by Da Vinci five centuries ago that Russia incorporated some of Da Vinci's elements into a modern robot. He was some of the elements that went into the robot night Da Vinci made into a modern robot he was working on for NASA to possibly use in the International Space Station on fucking real.

Starting point is 02:05:23 A NASA roboticist still learning from DaVinci, hail DaVinci. Time suck, tough five takeaways. Ha, alright, me, Saks. The highly talented, possibly ancient alien Leonardo DaVinci has been sucked. Leonardo from Vinci, which I could have met him. And again, if I fumbled more than usual, it wasn't from lack of effort. Thanks to the time suck team, thanks to the Queen of the Suck, Lindsey Cummins, high priestess of the Suck, Harmony Velocamp, Reverend Dr. Joe Horstcock Johnson-Pasley. Thanks to the bit, Elixir App Design Crew, new update, currently in a final baited test.

Starting point is 02:05:59 I'm loving my baita version. Thanks to Access Apparel, ScriptKeeperZackFlanery. Thanks to everyone, checking links in the episode description, bouncing out to Discord and our Facebook, called to the Curious Private Facebook group for further interaction and fellowship with fellow cult members. Next week, a return to true crime.

Starting point is 02:06:17 Ah, shit, the dirt bag, do of Henry Lee Lucas and Otis Toul, those are names I can say right every time. Running away for inspiration next week, indulging the base morbid curiosity so many of us share when it comes to true crime. Henry Lee Lucas and Otis tool, or either some of the worst serial killers in American history, or a pair of terrible liars. They claim to have traveled across America, murder and raping, burning, even cannibalizing everyone who crossed their paths, and if Henry Lee Lucas is to be believed, they killed thousands. The two men met in 1976 that a soup kitchen fell in love.

Starting point is 02:06:49 Before night fell, Lucas had basically moved into Touls' home, sharing his bed. They both claimed to have been murders before they met and then would go on to murder many more together. Both were horrifically abused as children, Lucas ended up killing his own mom in retaliation for abuse. Mother. Go in that direction again. After meeting the two traveled across 26 states, massacred as many people as they could find, praying upon hitchhikers, prostitutes, micro workers, and more, or did they? When they both were eventually arrested, they ended up talking a lot to police about what they'd done.

Starting point is 02:07:18 And then they talked some more and still some more and some more again. They basically confessed eventually to every unsolved murder that had happened during their lifetimes. Lucas in particular confessed to murders he couldn't possibly have committed, like he confessed over like a thousand murders. He for sure lied about some of them, but did he lie about all of them? Did they go to jail for murders they didn't commit? Or were they actually almost as bad as they were pretending to be? It's a dark tale, and after looking a bit into it, it sure seems like they did do for sure a lot of unbelievably horrible things Are they gonna be as bad as Albert Fish? Toybox Killer? Even worse?

Starting point is 02:07:51 Find out next Monday Find out what the cult has been up to right now with today's time-sucker updates Starting off with an update that truly made me laugh out loud when I first read it a Pat Say Jack update not kidding Time sucker Michael. I'll leave your last name out to keep you from possibly getting into or to some trouble I wrote in saying dead head sucker. I hear you are looking for some dirt on that awful man with a spelling show Pat Say Jack I hear you are looking for some dirt on that awful man with a spelling show, Pat SayJack. I grew up in the town. Pat SayJack lives in Maryland. So here's the dirt.

Starting point is 02:08:30 Pat was a dick to me when I was 16 years old in 2008. It was when I worked at a local grocery store, which happened to be across from his rich neighborhood. One day, I was refilling yogurt. When I spotted a man in sunglasses and a hat staring at the yogurt down the aisle for way too long. So I saddled up to the guy and asked if he needed any help. That's when out of nowhere, he just yelled at me about how he doesn't need help. He's in there all the time and then he says, and I quote, don't you know how much money I donate to this community? He yells at me briefly and storms off another part of the store. I immediately recognized him when he turned to yell at me. Fuckin' Pat SayJack.

Starting point is 02:09:09 To this day, I don't know why he decided to yell at me for trying to do my job and why he had to bring up his community dot-a-jins. So there you go. Pat SayJack is a dick. Now when you casually mention he's a monster on the show, you can at least know that he was a monster of sorts at least once. Thanks for such a great show for a history nerd to laugh and learn at. PS, his son and I are the same age and I knew him. He was a cocky ass.

Starting point is 02:09:29 Who thought he was the greatest baseball player ever and drove a Porsche at the age of 16. Well, thank you, Michael. I gotta say it is strange, you reassuring to know that Sage Jack isn't perfect. And while he's not a monster, he's not the monster I joke about. He's also not a saint, you know? The guy didn't like to be fucked with when he was scoping out some of that yogurt. He's thinking about his yogurt, you know? What is he gonna get?

Starting point is 02:09:50 Is he gonna get blackberry? Is he gonna get Greek? Do you want some frollo? You know, then apparently you interrupted that thought process. You fucking snapped a little bit. Maybe he was hungry. Frustrated time-circure Mitch Browning writes in about some tech issues, Mitch writes,

Starting point is 02:10:02 hey guys, I'm a huge fan of time-sock and I've been since the beginning. Thanks for all the effort your team puts into each episode. So my point in writing is to ask if you know why I haven't been getting the last few episodes on my Google Play account. I have an Android phone and it appears that I've been getting the last few episodes staggered between each other. I never got episodes 148, 151, 153.

Starting point is 02:10:19 You know what's going on? Please let me know. Thanks again for all you do. Loyal Time Sucker Mitch Browning. We again for all you do, loyal time sucker Mitch Browney. We'll meet some, sorry, you haven't trouble. Let me just start by saying Google Play fucking sucks. In my opinion, it's the worst podcast player out there. I hate it so much, truly, over the course of the show

Starting point is 02:10:37 and with the secret suck and with the app had had more problems with the Google Play store than with anything else than with any third party app than with Apple, which is crazy to me because with any third party app, then with Apple, which is crazy to me, because Google's a huge company, almost limitless technical support capabilities. But when it comes to podcasts, they don't give a shit.

Starting point is 02:10:52 The customer service is almost non-existent. They don't get back to podcast providers when our RSS feed fucks up on Google Play, the only place it is fucked up in like the last two years. Luckily, there's a ton of other free options. Podcast attic is a good app on Android. Cast box seems to be good. Stitcher works great, Spotify works great.

Starting point is 02:11:11 We have the Time Suck app. We have a major update coming out soon that based on the beta version I've had for weeks is better than all of those. Not kidding, it's gonna be, I think, so, so good. So sorry about Google Play, not that we can do on our end. I would recommend ditching that

Starting point is 02:11:24 and grabbing one of the many other awesome players out there that don't have problems. Hail, Memorad! Jesse James gang relatives update coming in from, yeah, yeah, yeah, sucker Daniel Ames. Daniel writes, dear master sucker. This is, oh, Rocco Ames. Oh, okay, I think it's a Daniel on the email for some reason. But anyway, this is Rocco Ames again, writing with a small Jesse James suck update.

Starting point is 02:11:47 You mentioned that one of your relatives, a Cummins was affiliated by the group. Yeah, winded Jim. Well, well, seems to have we have a bit in common. My biological father, whom you mentioned in a previous Ed and the Rain Warren update. Excuse me, has provided me with an unpublished photo of bloody Bill Anderson, claims him to be my four times great uncle. Apparently my biological grandmother had some genealogy done back in the early 1990s through some nonprofit. They were able

Starting point is 02:12:10 to dig out this information along with the photo they identified that was in an old box of our family photos. Who knows if it's 100% true, but we may have a photo somewhere of our ancestors smashing some cheap moon shine together. Keep up the great work. Hail never on. Hail, Lucifina. Praise that sweet boy, both jangles and most of all hail you, the baddest of the times I've been. Oh, that's very nice. P.S. Tell Paisy. There's no shame in his big or not so big dick game. That's a, that's amazing, Rocco. Yeah, small world. Yeah, sounds like your ancestors might probably did throw back some moonshine together after doing some horrible outlaw shit. And I'm guessing your relation may, made my relation a wee bit nervous.

Starting point is 02:12:46 I didn't realize until I lived more into my relation because of your message that another one of my relatives, our telecoms, was the wife of Bob Ford, the guy who shot Jesse James. Wendy Jim, bloody bill. I guess those maniacs have to be related to someone and they're related to us. Thanks for writing in. You fellow outlaw descended. And I think Pays, you do okay. He seems all right. Horse cock or, you know, or micro-pean, whatever. He's got cute kids and beautiful wives, so you know, life could be worse.

Starting point is 02:13:11 I don't think he's too worried about his win. Finally, touching vaccination update from Ryan last name anonymous. Who writes, you can read this on the pot if you want, but please leave my last name out. I wanted to thank you. I just finished listing to the episode about vaccinations, but finally inspired to do my

Starting point is 02:13:27 own research. I live in an area that is surprisingly full of anti-vaxxers. I have been on the fence about whether or not to vaccinate my firstborn son, do a October. After listening to this episode, I started really looking into study, scientific ones, not just the ones usually referenced in my neck of the woods that are mostly essays written by religious people. For the first time, I noticed just how much evidence there is to support vaccines being

Starting point is 02:13:48 a much safer option. I showed some of the research I found on my own and studies you referenced to my wife, and she and I are an agreement that we will be vaccinating our son and have a vaccine plan set up with our pediatrician. I wanted to say thank you for doing the episode because without you odds are I never would have heard just how much science there is to support vaccines. And you may have helped save my son's life.

Starting point is 02:14:10 It may sound stupid that I ever considered skipping them, but I'm a new father and just trying to do what's best for my son. And all we ever hear around here is vaccines give kids seizures or autism. And I've even heard from people I know very well that they have heard that vaccines cause AIDS. Huh? With all false information and fear being put out there, it's scary to think about how many times I've put my son in harm in harm's way, or might have put my son in harm's way, had I not looked into

Starting point is 02:14:35 vaccinations more. I've always been pretty gullible and willing to follow whatever information is put in front of me without looking into it myself. My son in this podcast have both inspired me to become more analytical. And I hope that maybe someday I myself can be the voice of reasons to someone in my situation. Sorry for the awful grammar. I never got higher than C in grammar class. Thanks for everything you do.

Starting point is 02:14:54 Keep spreading knowledge. Keep the third eye open. Hail, never on, keep on suck. Wow, some heavy shit. Ryan, and real quick, your grammar was top notch. At least I think so. I don't have a ton of grammar confidence myself. Your grammar abilities are easily 400 times greater than my pronunciation abilities.

Starting point is 02:15:11 I respect the shit out of your strong desire to be an amazing father, man. You sound like an awesome dude. I hope I've steered you right. What I really love is that you didn't trust me either and you did additional research yourself. I can't stress how important that is. No one should take what anyone else says at face value when it comes to something as important as deciding which needles to stick in their child. I did the best job I can. Saying words, spreading

Starting point is 02:15:33 what I feel is the most accurate info I can, but it never will be goddamn it. I was gonna say, literally, literally was gonna say inevitably I fuck up and I fuck up the word inevitably. Clearly I fuck up all the time. And you should not base any life decision off of any of the shit that comes out of my mush mouth without doing a lot of extra digging first. You know, when I want to spread most on this show, it's not, not total accuracy, it's just curiosity and just, you know, an analytical approach to life. You know, some kind of a version of what DaVinci had.

Starting point is 02:16:04 The curiosity to figure out how our world works, you know, and just try to figure out how, you know, how things work, why things are being said. Take things seriously, you know, it takes time to look into stuff, it's worth it. The more you learn the better decisions you're going to make, the better your life is going to be. I do believe that to be true with every fiber of my being. And I'm so, so grateful that I was able to spread that curiosity virus to you. So ask questions, verify information, Ryan. I love it.

Starting point is 02:16:31 Learn to discern good sources from bad sources. Think critically, make solid decisions, make the most out of your journeys around the beautiful sun. And, you know, and do the best job you can to give your kids the best chance at having the best life they can love this cult! Thanks, time suckers! I need a net! We all did! Have a great week everyone! Get out there and vent something amazing, create something beautiful, or, you know, if you don't want to do those things, maybe you can subscribe to the new scared of death podcast. I keep, I keep looking! And to keep an eye on a sakuna! I keep on an asakuna as much as you can!

Starting point is 02:17:18 So, sound like some guys were jerking off to the Mona Lisa. We're gonna have to Mona Lisa.

Timesuck with Dan Cummins - 155 - Leonardo da Vinci

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