Timesuck with Dan Cummins - 160 - Time Travel!

Episode Date: October 7, 2019

Time travel! Today on Timesuck we suck time itself! Will we ever be able to go back and kill Hitler? Or go to the future and visit a world of teleportation and sex robots? Is time travel scientifically possible? What does the science community currently understand about it? Is there any validity to the claims of many who already believe they've traveled through time? (Or at least claim to believe that.) We go all over the place in a fun, light-hearted, and informative romp through the space time continuum. My new horror podcast Scared to Death is ALIVE! Listen on Spotify, Stitcher, iTunes, Youtube, and more! Donating $3200 this month to the nonprofit - Holding Out Help. https://holdingouthelp.org/ Holding Out HELP provides those who come from a polygamous culture the resources needed to transition from isolation to independence! Thank you, Space Lizards! Happy Murder Tour Standup dates: (full calendar at http://dancummins.tv) October 10-13 Tampa, FL Sidesplitter's Comedy Club CLICK HERE for tix! October 19 Minneapolis, MN 10,000 Laughs Comedy Festival CLICK HERE for tix! October 24-26 Portland OR Helium Comedy Club CLICK HERE for tix! November 1-2 Columbus, OH Funny Bone Comedy Club CLICK HERE for tix! Listen to the best of my standup on Spotify! (for free!) https://spoti.fi/2Dyy41d Timesuck is sponsored by the Great Courses Plus! Get a month free! thegreatcoursesplus.com/TIMESUCK Timesuck is sponsored by Felix Gray. Get free shipping and risk free returns/exchanges http://felixgrayglasses.com/timesuck Watch the Suck on Youtube: https://youtu.be/ZQ26Ai0OqEc Merch - https://badmagicmerch.com/ Want to try out Discord!?! https://discord.gg/tqzH89v Want to join the Cult of the Curious private Facebook Group? Go directly to Facebook and search for "Cult of the Curious" in order to locate whatever current page hasn't been put in FB Jail :) For all merch related questions: https://badmagicmerch.com/pages/contact Please rate and subscribe on iTunes and elsewhere and follow the suck on social media!! @timesuckpodcast on IG and http://www.facebook.com/timesuckpodcast Wanna become a Space Lizard? We're over 5000 strong! Click here: https://www.patreon.com/timesuckpodcast Sign up through Patreon and for $5 a month you get to listen to the Secret Suck, which will drop Thursdays at Noon, PST. You'll also get 20% off of all regular Timesuck merch PLUS access to exclusive Space Lizard merch. You get to vote on two Monday topics each month via the app. And you get the download link for my new comedy album, Feel the Heat. Check the Patreon posts to find out how to download the new album and take advantage of other benefits.

You step into a ship made out of a top secret substance you've never laid eyes on. Wearing some futuristic radiation protection suit, complete with your own oxygen supply, you strap in and push a button to shut the door. See a scientist through the window dialing in the proper geometrical and temporal coordinates. Your ship is rotated around, pointing towards what looks like a black tunnel of infinite length. You hear the deep magnetic hum of an engine running on some previously unknown energy source

followed by a quick burst of white light. Your head slams back as your ship hurdles forward over 10,000 times as fast as a speed of light punching through wormhole after wormhole, holes and shortcuts in the space-time continuum. Suddenly the white light has gone and you're floating through space approaching the earth you just left. You burst into the atmosphere and hurtle towards the surface,

be holding the land so familiar, but as surface topography, you don't recognize. Gone are the metallic cities you're accustomed to hovering through and your automated transportation pod in their place, virgin forest. You see small tribes that people huddle on the beach, living in primitive huts, wearing the skins of the animals they've killed. You land far away from them, near the same location you left moments ago, but you didn't leave moments ago. You haven't left yet, not technically, because you're now is 35,000 years earlier than it was minutes ago. You've arrived far, far in the past. You've come to collect plant and mineral samples and bring them back to the future. You're a time traveler. You've been on similar missions a hundred times before. You live in a

world where humanity has conquered the uncomfortable time itself. Not only can you go anywhere, you can go any when. Think about how incredible that would feel for a moment. Will some version of this hypothetical scenario ever be the daily routine life of a future human? Will time travel ever move from the world of science fiction into the world of science? We look deep into this possibility today and explore so many other facets of humanity's collective fascination with time travel as we suck time itself Right here right now on time suck This is Michael McDonald and you're listening to Time Suck. You're listening to Time Suck.

Workin' way, meet Saks. I'm Dan Cummins, Suck Nasty, Suck Stardomis, and you are listening to TimeSuck. Happy Monday. Recording in the suck dungeon again today with Reverend Dr. Joe Paisley, high priest, his Harmony Valley camp, the script keeper, Zach Flannery, Queen of the Suck, Lindsay, picking up access apparel's cake key today.

Lot of activity around the studio today. A new charity announcement, that's exciting on behalf of our Patreon supporters, given $3,200 this month, been going up every month so thankful, given it to a charity inspired by a recent suck on Mormonism, holding out help. Holding out help.org provides those who come from a polygamous culture, the resources needed to transition from isolation to independence. HOH provides full service care to people who have escaped from organizations like the SLDS, very different than the LDS. People who have not been given an education, people with no family outside the cult, no

job skills, no knowledge of the outside world, no friends to help them out. HOH provides housing, clothing, counseling, education, and more to help former cult members become completely self-sufficient. Link in today's episode description if you'd like to learn more or donate yourself, holding out help.org. Hail Nimrod. Need to address a quick little mistake made on last Monday's show that I addressed on this past Thursday, Secret Suck.

Had a quick moment of silence at the end of the show for a time-sucker in spaces or to pass away suddenly in a car accident. Eric Wallace, also a young future space, is heard by the name of Joseph Lawrence Cox. The silence was given, but then in a rush to get the episode out on time, Reverend Dr. Joe accidentally erased that moment of silence. It could easily happen when you're editing. It just looks like I didn't hit the segment transition button in time because sometimes

I do not do that. Joe felt terrible. I've been five hours after the release. file with swap with the moment of silence put back in. And that's why some of you, most of you, never even heard this little flub. So sorry for some of you that appeared like I disrespectfully pushed a end of the updates button way too fast. I didn't.

Just a simple tech mistake. They happen. And we'd like to give those two departed souls another moment of silence now. Thanks again for the recent ratings and reviews for Time Suck. Also for scared to death. Blown away by how many time suckers have told me and told Lindsey that they love the new horror show means a lot because we love it. We're finding our footing with that show. We're having a good time doing so. Joe has been doing a great job.

Just laying down the horror beds and helping produce the show. Just the whole team has been excited about it. It's a fun, it's a fun creative counterpart. Time suck. And if you know, more and more of you keep listening or watching on YouTube, we'll keep doing scared to death for a long time. So I hope that's the case. Looking forward to seeing many of you in Tampa this weekend at side splitters, new standup special recording and Detroit. Gonna be a blast next weekend.

Tampa's my last time out to kind of tune it up. Make sure it's ready. Feels pretty ready. Performing at the 10,000 laughs comedy festival Minneapolis Saturday, October 19th at the Parkway theater right after the taping. So get there. And then helium comedy club in Portland following week, October 24th to the 26th. The Columbus Ohio funny bone November 1st and 2nd. Comedy works in Denver. November 7th through the 9th live time suck in Denver on the 10th. Feeling on top of my standup game lately.

Thanks to everyone hitting those shows. A quick question. What do you think about unisex sweatpants? Forum or against them? If you're against them, just zone out for 30 seconds. Think about how cool it is going to be to travel through time. If you're forum, good news. We have some hot time sucks sweats in the time sucks store right now. Baby's cold outside in some places, around here is freezing last week. What's the flip? Pretty

cold this morning. That's why I'm wearing my little time suck jacket. Stay warm as the weather turns cold and look, look comfort color is 100% cotton, gray tapered, cool kid sweats. All sweat pants also made out of penny pooper and ginger bells doodle hair for maximum softness, cuteness and playfulness. So hopefully I didn't just shave down, you know, both dogs just started getting cold outside

for nothing. They're shivering so you can be warm. Also, space loads are glistening. Holy shit, you guys went hard on the robes. My God, sorry to those of you who didn't get them. I had no idea. They would be so popular. I didn't think they would be.

Thank Logan and Kate of access for convincing Lindsey and I to try them. We weren't going to. We were against doing this. Not because we didn't want to. I just didn't think people would want to buy these, you know, kind of high-end cult robes. Because of the robes going so quick, new cultier segment coming soon to the secret suck already, uh, plan of that one right now. So that's gonna be, it's gonna be fun. But that's another show. Let's, let's talk about today's

show. Yeah, yeah, yeah, time travel. Time suckers is time to suck time itself. I love saying that. The space that is properly decided for the Will and Nimrod time travel won the last patron voting round. And today we're given the concept of time travel, the time suck treatment. Excited for this one. And I know I say that almost every time it's always true. This episode is going to take us all over the space time continuum as well as the lesser known, but arguably more entertaining idiot to internet equilibrium.

I'll be honest, as excited as I am to learn some stuff about time travel, I am more excited to explore that second lesser known equilibrium. I'll be honest, as excited as I am to learn some stuff about time travel, I am more excited to explore that second, lesser known equilibrium. Within this episode, we'll find out what our best scientific folk think about the possibility of time travel, plus we'll separate the sigh from the thigh. And we'll also look at a bunch of interesting claims from folks who say that they themselves are time travelers. So you know that's going to be sweet. These are the people living in that idiot, the internet equilibrium I spoke of. So good. We're going to talk about the Philadelphia experiment, a suck in itself to be sure, but we'll

touch on it. We'll touch on the infamous project Montauk. We'll dig into some deep government shit. We'll even go over some of the best time traveler movies to show how dreams of time travel seem perpetually embedded in the zeitgeist of the last century. Why not? The suck is gonna be one part science, one part science fiction, probably three or four parts edited internet. Let's do it. Intro, graphic, graphic, and sounder engage. Did you know that the idea of time travel is thousands of years old? Well, it's not.

It's infinite. Open your mind. Time travels from the future have been traveling to the ancient past for forever, literally. How is that possible? Well, obviously, humanity, if you've been paying attention, is caught in an infinite time loop because time has no beginning and no end. The future is limitless as is the past, the alpha and the omega on the same flat circle. It's like McConaughey told us in turd detective.

Everything we've ever done or will do. We're going to do over and over and over again. Wake up, sheephole. Ancient reptilians brought their machines to Earth 10,000 years ago. I think maybe a million years ago doesn't matter. Pay attention. What matters is the anew to key lizard folk brought machines, including time travel machines, then enslaved humanity, then humanity rebelled, then we humans learned how to use and master their time machines. And we started going back in time to prepare for the lizards arrival, like we had done, but also never done. Stay with me. The lizard

people anticipated our actions went even further back in time with their own time machines. We then adjusted, pushed even further back, like we had always done and had never done. Don't lose focus now. Further and further back each side has pushed forever, infinitely, two hot real cars on the same circular track, always driving forward, only to always come back around, the lizard and human battle fought in the past as it simultaneously spirals into the future, pushing past the planes of Nimron and Lucifina. Ancient astronauts returning over and over from to forming infinitely expanding future, 18 in the rebellion of an infinitely expanding past.

I'm not done yet, almost there. At various points in the war, holes have been punched with the space-time continuum. Alternate planes of reality created the Mandela effect introduced as parallel universe spiral out, expanding a measurably outward, horizontally, in the space-time continuum. In some of those parallel planes, humanity evolved to a post-humanist state, where machines took over, eliminated humanity, ran simulations in order to study human behavior, learn how to properly pair to defend themselves from the attack of humanoid, sentient alien races, who do come back and attack because aliens are alternate versions of us we are currently living in one

of those simulations and I've already recorded this episode a million fucking times! You get it, right? That was crazy. Listen guys, oh my heck, doesn't that? Thinking about time and travel for too long can make a meet-sack go insane. I thought about it so much that the rant I just gave actually kinda makes sense to me on some level.

Maybe not the lizard part, but definitely the infinite time loop part. I mean, where does it end? Where does time end? Is it a straight line? Or is it a slowly curving loop? Does it circle back on itself? If so, can we break out of the loop

and rejoin at different points, intersect it to travel into the past and future? Could we alter the pattern? If we did that, I totally understand why there's so much fascination around the concept of time travel. One thought leads to another and another, and the possibilities truly seem infinite. Here's another thought to ponder. If time travel has ever invented

in a back to future type way, at any point in our future, then wouldn't we have already been influenced by time travelers? I mean, if the technology ever exists at any point in humanity's future timeline, I would have to imagine that someone would eventually be bound to use it, right? Why else created if you're not going to try it? And then eventually, I would think that someone would inevitably travel back to our time or before our time. So if the ability to travel through time ever exists, then it already exists. Does my lizard rant make a little more sense now?

Oh my heck! Well, all this bull malarkey makes my noggin spin! Gosh dang, allow, I'm going to refocus as far as we know, living in 2019, unaware of alternate planes of existence and additional parallel timelines. Time travel has not already affected our reality. And I'm aware of does that mean it will never exist? Maybe by the end of this episode, I'll be able to answer that maybe not. In our current known reality, we have historical evidence of humanity pondering the meaning of time going, I'll be able to answer that. Maybe not. In our current known reality, we have historical evidence of humanity pondering

the meaning of time going back thousands of years. When we get into today's time-stuck timeline, we'll lay those ponderings out, a lot of context to get into first. Modern fascination with time travel seems to be increasing. I think because technology makes more and more of what used to exist only in the realm of sci-fi speculation now seem like an upcoming reality. Or reality, and some of it's already here.

I don't think now that the concept is out there and we begin to think about it that we'll ever stop thinking about time travel. I mean, why would we? It's really fucking cool to think about. Most people I'm guessing would love to go back into the past and fix something they did or said wrong or even go into the future. See, maybe things they should avoid, the ability to manipulate time. That's some God's shit. That's God power. Most people I'm guessing would love to play God.

Hail Nimrod. Give me your sweet Nimrod powers. It's not just imagination nerds like me who think about time travel, actual scientists like to theorize about its possibility. Many in the science community are interested in time travel, but maybe not in the back to the future doctor who type way like I am. For many scientists exploring the concept of time travel just ends up happening naturally as they explore the physics of the universe in general.

As they attempt to define its various rules big and small, they inevitably run into the rules that govern time. The scientists perhaps most mentioned regarding time travel is probably former suck subject, Albert Pass it on Einstein Buckle up got a little heavy science to plow through the 10% of you may actually enjoy and I'm not in that 10% by the way But I'm trying to make it I'm gonna try to make it fun Then we will return to concepts that do not make me want to throw my laptop into a wall and scream What does that even mean why am I so angry somebody give me a sandwich? I'm hungry

So so let's get into it. Here we go. Ininvestigating the consequences of mathematical physicist, James Clerk Maxwell's equations of electromagnetics. Albert Einstein developed a theory that showed how light waves are observed to behave in different frames of reference. One of the consequences of Maxwell's equations and a foundation of special relativity

is that the speed of light in a vacuum is constant. 300,000 kilometers per second, no matter what reference frame it is observed in. Actually, it's exact value. It's 299,792,458 meters per second for you, math nerds. Einstein builds on Maxwell's equations, and while studying these light waves, he had an epiphany and established that time is not unchangeable, as nearly everyone

preceding him had thought. Time is not unchangeable. Einstein said it, and that makes time travel feel possible to me, nerd boner, full mast. Einstein later developed a general theory of relativity that explains gravity and the geometry of the universe. He established that time and space are bound together in a four-dimensional, space-time continuum. The old space-time continuum.

That's one of those terms I like to say because it makes me feel smart, even though I have never had any idea what it actually means. Apparently, space-time consists of three coordinates of space, up, down, left, right, and backward forward. Plus one of time, and events can only be analyzed and understood in this system where space and time are linked. Kind of get that, but also, I'm not gonna be quizzed.

These theories show the time travel to the future is in a certain sense possible, sweet. Oh my heck, that's fun. If time passes at different rates and two separate reference frames that are moving with respect to one another, then in principle, it is possible for two people to travel in separate directions

and return to the same place with more time having passed for one of them than four of the other. Okay, head hurting. Brain a little bit angry and sad right now. Kind of want to match my computer. Does this mean that if you kept doing this over and over again, this person who time passes more slowly for it would live quite a bit longer than the other person? Eh, kind of, whether or not the scenario I just described constitutes traveling to the

future, I guess it's a matter of interpretation. Time passes more slowly for one person, but it's not like either person actually jumps through time and sees their future self or past self or does any of the stuff I want to be possible like in the cool movies I've watched. A time at clocks have been used to prove that the warping effect of gravity changes the way time is measured, which is a tenant of general relativity. Time can bend gravity. That's a theory.

Could bending time or I guess gravity can bend time is really how to phrase that. Could bending time make time travel gravity can bend time. There's really how to phrase that. Could bending time make time travel possible? Something so. Contrary to popular conceptions, most theories of time travel sadly do not rely on machines like time machines. Instead, proponents suggest that time travel will likely be done by way of entirely speculative, natural phenomena, things like rotating black holes, wormholes, cosmic strings, things that tend to deal with a lot of gravity bending a whole bunch of time.

And these things could theoretically transport us instantly forward or backward from one point in time to another, something maybe we'll look into that further in just a bit. Time travel is probably the holy grail of science, some kind of arc of the covenant of science, something that many will search for, even though it might not actually exist, many have searched for. Some of our greatest minds have already spent large chunks of their time here on earth, trying to figure out of time travel as possible. Great minds from Einstein to Stephen Hawking, Nicola Tesla, Carl Sagan, many others have weighed in.

We'll use them as our guides as we travel through various time travel possibilities. Even though the quest to travel through time comes from the world of science, the world of science is not where its popularity comes from. Its popularity comes from the world of fiction, as we'll learn in this episode, it's the storytellers of history that have used time distortion in so many clever ways to move their characters through their narratives, and these storytellers, they have made time travel capture our imagination. So let's look at some of their stories. A lot of books and films used mysteriously simple items to travel through time.

Like the time-turner and Harry Potter and the prisoner of Oscar band, I'm probably not saying that right. Oh man, I know Harry Potter nerds. I haven't thought about Harry Potter in several years. So if you're like, it's actually Oscar band, fuck whatever, all right, easy, fiction. Ancient Japanese, September the the 1993 classic teenage mutant Ninja Turtles III,

the 2009 documentary Hot Tub Time Machine used as you may have guessed it, a Hot Tub, it's a time machine which is pretty sweet when it travels through time. Or if you're gonna do it, you know, especially if you had some kind of solar powered Hot Tub or maybe powered by magic,

maybe one that runs on Ormus, something that lets you just continue to tub it up when you're back in time. Chatting with you know, Leonardo da Vinci, gang is con, maybe gang is con, would have been a lot more chill. If you would have had a hot tub to relax in. Both Dr. Who and Bill and Ted used phone booths to bend time.

Although again nerds. Dr. Who fans probably see them here right now for calling the Tartus the phone booths and second for not calling it just by its proper name Tartus. The Tartus is actually a spaceship. So, that's time machine of ancient origins. It has the ability to change its shape into anything, but that particular feature on Dr. Who's particular Tartus

is broken, so it looks like a place box, which is indeed a booth with a phone in it. So, breathe easy, Dr. Who fans, I get it. Homer Simpson used a time travel toaster to muck around time in a tree house, a horror episode. Well Arnold Schwarzenegger used that little electricity ball to get his naked ass to 1991, so we could run around a mall with a shotgun

to the sounds of guns and roses. You should be my, I'm, for those of you keeping score at home, the naked man time ball Arnold wrote is called a time displacement equipment or it's called time displacement equipment in the terminator franchise. A bunch of films, views, spaceships, send their characters through time. Star Trek is done at multiple times.

Most captains Kirk and Picard have time travel themed movies under their belts and that little weird fucking mini-warf looking guy on Star Trek D space 9 is done in a few times as well. The science obviously varies in these stories. The vehicle for time travel in the popular lost TV series was the island itself. Sorry, that's a spoiler alert for anyone, but come on! Yeah, a long time to watch that shit. Mysterious Ocarina, it's time travel device in the popular video game Legend of Zelda, Ocarina of Time. Certainly one of the best time travel vehicles of ever is from Jean-Claude Van Dames, 1994, cinematic masterpiece, Time Cop. I'm pretty sure that Time Cop won the Academy Award for Best

Everything. I'm also almost certain that the award for Best Character in any book, film, or TV show in the history of human entertainment was personally handed to Jean-Claude Van Dam by the president of Hollywood, by the president of Shobbis. All I remember from that movie is that the sweet time slip, that Van Damme slid through time on, and then of course there was that, and then I, JCVD did the karate splits. I'm just kitchen counter in these boxer briefs to successfully dodge a futuristic taser dart. Then you just held it there full but flex splits on the counter until the end of the scene. If I try to do that, I would have to find a time machine

if I ever wanted working legs again. Because doing that, which is fucking snap both of my legs off. There are tons of actual attempts to make time machine seem pretty sciencey in films as well from the steam plug looking device, from H.G. Wells novel to time machine, to Carl Sagan's massive space time bending machine

in contact, or the flux capacitor and the Delorean that Marty McFly and Dr. Emmett Brown drove in the back to the future franchise. So many different ways to time bend in the comic book world as well. Excuse me. The flash has his cosmic treadmill.

The men in black, men in black three have their time jump device. Superman just fucking reverse rotation of the earth in 1978 Superman the movie. No big whoops Just make the world spend the other way for a while Which I had Superman and my fantasy football team doubt someone who can reverse the earth's rotation is gonna ever get a high-angle Spray and fuck over my whole season Anywho

There are hundreds of other creative works revolver on time travel actually one of the top 20 grossing films of all time the number one Number five number eight and number twelfth highestest grossing movies have time travel as part of their plot. Full disclosure, all of those are Avengers movies. The Transformers and Harry Potter franchises also touch on time travel. Rank high and the top 100 grossing films of all time. Hollywood is where most of the popular methods for theoretical time travel have been introduced to the design guise. These methods are all over the place. Let's look at a few of the major ones. First there's the, let's call it the one way travel to the future type way, where the

traveler leaves home, but the people here, she left behind age faster than they do, and if they return to those people, those people are older or dead by the time the traveler returns. That's a bummer. You go explore the future, zip through some wormhole, even just a few years for you or maybe a few minutes, you know, it could be 50 or 5,000 years for those you left behind. Now your children, your parents age, your parents are dead or some horrible scenario. The movie Interstellar from 2014 deals with this type of time travel.

The next mode of altering time would be time travel by moving through higher dimensions. For example, this we can also go back to interstellar. And interstellar, there are terror racks, excuse me, terror racks available in which astronauts can travel because the vessel represents time as a dimension of space. Interstellar sounds good. I haven't seen it, but I want a maconaheus in it. I like these come up twice in the suck. Reminds me he can be a great actor not just a star of those weird linking commercials that might be my least favorite commercials of all time. And what is a terror act?

A test-a-ract, there we go, test-a-ract. Such an odd looking word. What is a test-a-ract? It's defined as a four-dimensional analog of a cube. The test-a-ract is to the cube, is the cube, is to the square. And if that makes perfect sense to you, kudos, you have a deeper understanding of geometry than I do.

A similar concept is expressed in a wrinkle in time that was released in 2018 based on the book series that began in 1963. And this series time is folded by means of a Tesseract and the book to Tesseract is the fifth dimension of space and time and the movie version of a wrinkle in time Supernatural Beans make time travel possible. So that's what we need.

Great time travel possible Supernatural Beans. Come on, Luciferina. Let's go through time. Let's use some of your magic. I did see a wrinkle in time and I hated it. It was my kids and I think I might have fallen asleep in the middle. I know I at least wanted to. I wish I could travel back in time and watch interstellar instead of watching a wrinkle in time. Another mode of time transportation comes from the time comes from traveling with a space time vortex. The famous doctor, who series features the Tartus phone booth, Tartus standing for time and relative dimension in space.

And the Tartus uses an extra dimensional vortex to go through time, while the travelers inside feel time passing normally. And what the fuck is a vortex? Well the term can be applied to basically any type of whirling mass. In this context, it means a rapid rotator, rotator-y movement of cosmic matter about a center regarded as accounting for the origin or phenomena of bodies or systems of bodies in space and to understand it further than that, you'd have to spend at least 10 years in a dungeon of textbooks and chalkboards and frustration.

Did you know the doctor who, by the way, has been on TV since 1963? I didn't think it was been around that long. Not continuously. There's been some down years, but most years since 1963, new doctor who episodes have been getting produced. Also random trivia, the BBC debut doctor who the day after JFK was assassinated. Coincidence? you, Dr. Who the day after JFK was assassinated, coincidence. Ha, was JFK killed by some Dr. Who producers? Cause, you know, cause, actually, I don't know how that would help them actually.

Another popular type of time machine portrayed on film and TV as instantaneous time jumping. Examples of this include the girl who leapt through time from 2006, the DeLorean, and the back to the future franchise. And Mr. Peabody's WABAC machine from the Rockian Pollanical show that ran from 1959 to 1964. Sweet. That's what I want to figure out. I think, maybe that'd be terrible. People always say stuff like, oh, that'd be so awesome. You know, if you just go back and forth, however, just, you know, bounce out however you want. Now, I'll go back and kill Hitler. All right, well, what if you did that? I want to have them because Hitler doesn't exist in a vacuum because there, you know, been

anti-Semitic sentiment in Europe since basically, since there had been semi-Tzen Europe. And because the German people looking for a scapegoat, not because of Hitler, but because of economic conditions, because of sanctions, punishments, doled out, because the German actions were World War I. What if some other motherfucker took this place? After you killed Hitler, and what if that guy didn't try to fight a war on two fronts, didn't try to invade Moscow and the winner and actually succeeded and killed even more people. What if that guy killed people whose descendants would have gone on to invent vaccines and

built computers and created the internet and make high definition free streaming pornography and really other, you know, other important shit. But seriously, how dangerous could back to the future type time travel be? What if the more you try to go back and fix mistakes the worse you made things in the present future? What if you know you, you fucked back and fix mistakes, the worse you made things in the present future? What if you know you fucked up the present, you end up killing someone in the past whose descendants would go on

to invent the time machine itself, and now we're stuck in this shitty world, you fucked up for everybody. Again, you can endlessly speculate on this. Time is a flat circle. Everything we've ever done or will do. We're gonna do over and over and over again. Oh my God, hey, another variation of the instantaneous form of time travel in the movies is time

traveling instantly while standing still, both the time machine from HD Wells 1895 book and Hermione Granger's time turner from Harry Potter, keep the travelers still while they move through time. And if we're going to go this route, as dangerous as it could be, being able to zip around without moving would be better. You know, it's easier, way less dangerous than Reverend Lorian DMC 12 up to 88 miles an hour. Slow time travels, another method that movies have demonstrated. And the night, in the 2004 film primer,

a traveler stays on a box while time moves around them. For each minute, they want to go back in time, they need to stay in the box for a minute. If you wanna go back a day, you know, you just stay in the box for 24 hours. Haven't seen this movie either. It was an indie film that apparently has become a cult classic if you're looking for some new time travel film. Sounds tedious. Not that useful in very many cases outside of a voting quick tragic accidents. Another way Hollywood has shown beans being able to travel through time is by having them travel faster than light and Superman the movie from 1978 Superman flies faster than light to go back in time and

rescue Lois Lane before she is killed establishing an impossible standard for real life romance. If I die, would you love me enough to travel back in time and save me? No, no, I'd probably be sad for a while. And then eventually start to get horny and at some point the hornyness would outweigh the sadness that I would move on love you. Bye This traveling faster than light concept was also used in 1980 novel timespacescape by Gregory Benford And which the protagonist sends hypothetical faster than light tacky on particles back to earth in 1962 to warn of disaster

This common time travel mode in movies used in spaceships like with Star Trek. The last broad category of time travel methods and employed in the world of fiction is the fuck off. We know how this is happening. Miss Lennie's box of methods. Definitely time cops, mysterious time slit falls into that category as does the naked man ball of the Terminator franchise. So that's the gist of how Hollywood in the world of fiction and general has played with the concept of time travel and countless waste entertainers. I'm sure there are many examples I've left out. We meet Sachs love time travel.

We're super into playing with the possibilities of bending time and space. Also as we've discussed a bit already, fair amount of scientists have become obsessed with it. And again, do unlock the key to the rules of the universe. Scientists might end up unlocking the ability to time travel as well. So let's bounce out of pop culture, pop back into science for a bit before bouncing back into a timeline. It's not in, bouncing back, we'd bounce into it over the first time. In the world of science, there are two basic types of time travel. It sounds very simple, but just to make it clear,

going forward into the future and going backwards in the past. Those are the two types. Make sense. So far, I'm understanding this perfectly. There are several hypothesis of how one could propel someone into the future, going backward seems to be a bit more complicated. It appears baby Hitler may be safe for now. To look at future time travel possibilities, let's first ask, what is time?

What is big deal with time? Time is Rosalind and Rosalind is time and Rosalind is limp and limp is Russia. Sorry, Tika Tilo not know much about time travel. She could deal with show self-health now. Maybe Tika Tilo wait for through time stock. I apologize. While most people have thought of time as a constant physicist Albert Einstein, as I said earlier, showed that the construct of time is someone of illusion. It's relative. It can vary for different observers depending on your speed through space. As you mentioned, to Einstein, time is the fourth dimension. So let's go over the space time continuum one more time, because well, it's fucking confusing. In the space time continuum,

space is described as a three-dimensional arena, which provides a travel with three spatial coordinates, length, width, height. Showing location, time provides a fourth coordinate direction, although conventionally you can only move forward. Those, so that's it, three spatial coordinates, one temporal coordinate. An Einstein's theory of special relativity says that time slows down or speeds up depending on how fast you move relative to something else,

approaching the speed of light a person inside of the spaceship would age much slower than his twin at home. Also under Einstein's theory of general relativity, gravity bends time. Wah. I'd further understand how gravity affects time, picture the fourth dimensional fabric of space time. Picture this kind of cube.

All right, when anything that had, you know, like if there was like a blanket draped over the cube, anything that had, you know, like if there was like a blanket draped over the cube, anything that has mass sitting on this piece of the blanket causes a dimple or a bending of the space time, right? This bending of space time causes objects to move on a curved path and that curvature of space is what we know is gravity. Gravity is created by curves in the space time continuum that doesn't make sense. You do not feel bad.

You are not alone. I read a ton of articles, watched a bunch of tutorial videos and the scientists kept saying, shit like the force of gravity is nothing but warps and curves and space and time. It's the geometry of the universe that communicates the force of gravity. And then I try and truly understand this concept. The concept of concept of Einstein 10 fucking years to come up with. I get why a lot of people end up leaving, you know, she like the earth is flat. Not kidding. Not having a strong educational background in science, not having the time or

aptitude or interest that would take to gain a strong background in science. Listing to a scientist, explain how gravity works, reminds me of listening to conspiracy theorists like David I could explain how lizard people have gained control of humanity. In both cases to me, it's just a confident person stringing together a series of big scrabble words with authority that don't make a whole lot of sense to me. That being said, I'm willing to believe that all of this totally checks out. I trust with the Einstein's and other theoretical physicists who are saying, you know, I trust it as legit because unlike the David Iks of the world, I believe in the power of scientific education.

I believe that if a lot of people all over the world study very, very hard for a long time in one specific scientific rigorously scrutinized field of knowledge and keep coming up with the same answers or at least very similar answers that build off one another, they're probably right. Or at the very least they have the best odds of being right to the most right people alive right now. Right, as opposed to conspiracy theorists

who rarely seem to agree with their own convoluted theories if you listen to them ramble on long enough. For those of you who do understand this stuff, I'm gonna dive back into some more science who rarely seem to agree with their own convoluted theories if you listen to them ramble on long enough. For those of you who do understand this stuff, I'm gonna dive back into some more science for those of you who don't fun. It is to the internet segments coming up soon. That's fun, hell no, right. Both the general and special relativity theories

have been proven over and over with things like GPS satellite technology and the use of various very accurate time pieces. The effects of gravity as well as the satellites increased speed above the Earth's relative to observers on the ground, makes unadjusted clocks gain 38 microseconds a day. Engineers have to make calibrations to account

for that difference. In a census effect called time dilation means that astronauts are time travelers as they return to Earth's very, very slightly younger than their identical twins that remain on the planet because of the speeds they reach in space. General relativity also provides some scenarios that could allow time travelers to go back in time, according to NASA.

The equations, however, might be very difficult, difficult to ever physically achieve, because basically meat sacks will be turned into ground beef in every one of these scenarios. Another scientific possibility to travel through time, we already touched on this to go faster than light, good luck with that. Another possibility that NASA has stated could make time travel possible will be to create wormholes between different points and space time.

While Einstein's equations provide for these wormholes, they would collapse very quickly, would only be suitable for very small particles. Also, scientists haven't actually observed these wormholes yet. Their existence is only theoretical. Wormholes were originally called white holes, or Einstein-Rosen bridges, excuse me, named after Einstein and fellow physicists, Nathan Rosen, who proposed their existence in 1935.

Wormholes, a kind of tunnel that connects two points in space time. The tunnel could be a straight shoot or take a more winding path. And a wormhole has never been observed directly or even indirectly. So why do we think they're real? Basically because the numbers crunch out when people with Einstein brains are crunching how the fuck does our universe work in question? It's fair enough. Also, even if wormholes are real, we aren't even close to having the technology needed

to create one. Sorry, Stargate fans. Doesn't look like we're going to be wormhole in our way around the universe anytime soon. So we're going to have to stick to other forms of holin' like corn holin'. So yeah, that's not terrible. Basically, any time travel methods rely on the science of Einstein's series of the space-time continuum indicate that time travel is technically possible but super difficult. And when it comes to something like zippin' through time and delorean, like Marty McFly and back to the future. Ah, probably outright impossible.

Damn it. Fuck you, Einstein. Cuzn hump and son of a bitch. Way to take a shit in our time travel parade. Sorry. That was a necessary cash dang. Luckily other scientists have proposed alternate solutions to jump back and forth in time that doesn't require a wormhole or bending the fabric of the space time continuum.

American astronomer Frank Tipler, a current to Lane University professor, has proposed a mechanism, sometimes known as a Tippler cylinder. Where one would take matter that is 10 times the sun's mass rolled into a very long but very dense cylinder, spin it up to a few billion revolutions per minute, and then a spaceship nearby following a very precise spiral around the cylinder could get itself on a closed time like curve. And then it can suddenly emerge. Thousands, even billions of years from a starting point and possibly several galaxies away.

Okay. Sounds pretty dangerous and pretty complicated. Not sure anyone's going to roll matter 10 times a sun's mass and do a long fucking tube. Did I mention how long it needs to be? Infinitely long. And then you gotta get it rolling. It's just, you know, not too fast, just a few billion revolutions per minute. This is bullshit. I'll do respect to Professor Tipler, but this garbage.

I'm not saying it wouldn't work theoretically, but I'm gonna file this one under the, who gives a fuck drawer? Right, if you're gonna require an impossible situation to make time travel possible, you might as well just say, it's impossible, which I know isn't technically true, but for practical purposes it is, and this is in this scenario, I want to know what other impossible situations could make time travel possible.

Oh totally, time travel is for sure possible. All you have to do to travel through time is to get too gargoyles to fuck on a spaceship. While traveling at the speed of light, while one of them recites a Gregorian chant backwards the ancient Greek, while the other juggles seven chain saws, while blind folded in zero gravity conditions. And if all of that happens, you get transported to either 1976

or a billion years in the future. Ah, damn it. Being able to step into a working time machine and do something cool, like watch Josephine Baker do the Charleston, you know, topless, or kick Hitler in the dick, starting to look like it's just not going to happen. At least not in our lifetimes.

But what about black holes, you say? And by you, I mean nerds. Yes, there are other possibilities for time travel and some of them include black holes. Some nerds think you could travel through time if you were able to move a spaceship rapidly around a black hole. Or to, you know, just easy peasy, artificially create a black hole. Just, you know, great, huge rotating structure, which sounds, you know, about as likely as two Gargoyles fucking in a spaceship.

A super nerd, a former, you know, he passed away, physicist Stephen Hawking wrote in the Daily Mail in 2010, around and around they'd go experiencing just half the time of everyone far from the black hole. The ship and his crew would be traveling through time. Imagine they circled the black hole for five years, ten years would pass elsewhere when they got home. Everyone on Earth would have aged five years more than they had. Whatever, Steve. Still not as cool as Dr. Hugh.

Or Hugh? Well, why did I pronounce Hugh? Still not as cool as Dr. Who are back in the future. Stephen added that the crew would need to travel around the speed of light for this to work. And then to make all this even more likely, physicist Amos Iron, the Technion Israel Institute of Technology in Haifa, or Haifa, Israel pointed out another limitation. Then the machine built with current known materials will be torn apart far before being able to zip around the speed of light.

Which is why we need to shift gears and focus on finding those two gargoyles. Wake up, sheeple. Think about it. Another theory for potential time-clowers involves something called cosmic strings. Nero tubes of energy stretched across the entire length of the ever-expanding universe. These thin regions, leftover from the early cosmos are predicted to contain huge amounts of mass and therefore can warp the space time around them if they exist. We've never found one like wormholes. They're believed to exist because the space mass equations numbers check out. Cosmic strings are infinite or loops with no end

sign to say. The approach of two such strings parallel to each other would bend space time so vigorously and in such a particular configuration that it would make time travel possible, you know, in theory. The idea of an actual time machine also on scientists minds. Finally, you know, we're done talking about black holes and wormholes and cosmic strings that are galactic yarn and shit. So what would an actual time machine look like? Probably not like a delorean or a phone booth. Time machine research often involves bending space times so far, the timelines turn back on themselves to form a loop, technically known as a closed time like curve.

To accomplish this, time machines are often thought to need an exotic form of matter, so called negative energy or an exotic form of matter, matter that has so called negative energy or an exotic form of matter that has so-called negative energy density. Such exotic matter has bizarre properties, including moving in the opposite direction, normal matter when pushed. Also might not exist. Also, even if it does theoretically exist, might not be present in quantities large enough for the construction of a time machine. So there's a couple hurdles here. Additional time machine research suggests that time machines are possible maybe without exotic matter. This is how these egg heads explain it.

They say that the work of building a time machine begins with a donut shape hole enveloped within a sphere of normal matter. Inside the donut shaped vacuum, space time could get bent upon itself, focused or using focused gravitational fields to form a closed, closed goddamnit time-like curve to go back at time, a trail that would race around inside of the donut, going further back into the past with each lap.

The theory has a number of obstacles besides sounding fucking stupid. The gravitational fields required to make such a closed time-like curve would have to be very strong, manipulated them, would have to be very strong and manipulated them We have to be very precise and also No one has a fucking clue how to make a space donut For now we only have regular donuts Which isn't too bad because they are delicious Especially when they're fresh with maple frost on top But what about part of acceleration you say and by you?

I mean the little fella hang up by his jacket inside a high school locker with a kick me sign tape who's back and broken glass on his stupid fucking nerd face. Let's talk about CERN. The world's largest particle accelerator known as the Large Hadron Collider. Is it the world's largest particle physics laboratory, the CERN laboratory in Geneva, Switzerland? CERN is also known as the European Organization for Nuclear Research. The acronym makes sense in another language I'm sure. A deep underground and land of perpetually neutral of the perpetually neutral. It's time

to make a joke about the Swiss. Nah, I just bombed it. It's a circular tunnel, 16 miles long, and inside that is a stream of trillions of tiny particles. When the power is turned on, these particles accelerate from zero to 60,000 miles an hour in a fraction of a second. Increase the power and the particles go even faster and faster and faster and tell they're whizzing around the tunnel. 11,000 times a second, nearly the speed of light. And when that happens, they do start to travel in time. Finally, some positive time travel science news.

We know the particles time travel because of extremely short-lived particles called pions. Ordinarily, these pions disintegrate after just 25 billions of a second. But when they are taken to near light speed, the last 30 times longer. So fucking yay for pions. So if you want to travel in the future, it looks like we're going to have to figure out how to go really, really, really fast and not die. And that'll take us really far away, which means we may be traveling through time, but probably not jumping into the future of our own timeline, at least not using this

speed-based method to time travel. How close will we come to going fast enough to really travel through time? Not close at all. The fastest man vehicle in history was Apollo 10. It reached speeds of roughly 25,000 miles per hour, but to travel in time, we're going to need to go more than 2,000 times that fast. Oh my heck, that's a lot faster. I know math's good enough to understand that. And to do that, we're gonna need a bigger ship. An enormous machine built out of something stronger

than anyone has built us far, built with a matter that doesn't exist yet, using a propulsion system, like the running on field that we don't even know about. So what do science have to say about some other non-physics related problems? You know, the kind I touched on when talking about killing baby Hitler, like you know,

let's talk about the grandfather paradox. Let's talk about even if we could make this nearly impossible machine and we used it, what would actually happen? The grandfather paradox is the hypothetical situation which a time-tower goes back and kills his parents or his grandfather, the major plot line and the terminator movies or otherwise interferes in their relationship, think back to the future so that he is never born or his life is forever

altered. If that were to happen, some physicists say you would not be born in one parallel universe, but you would still be born in another to make this all even more confusing. Others say that the photons that make up light prefer self-consistency in timelines, which is a fancy way of saying the universe is built to not allow you to fuck with the past. Still, other scientists say that any form of time travel is impossible.

The faster than light theory, you know, in particular, Drew Derijian, a derision from the American Museum of Natural History, Astrophysicist Charles Liu, who said that simply mathematically doesn't work. All right, fair enough. Also, as we've noted, humans will probably not be able to withstand time travel at all.

Traveling near the speed of light would be lethal. Said Jeff Toliskin, Professor of Physics at Chapman University in 2012. Using gravity would also be deadly to experience time dilation. One would have to stand in like something as powerful as a neutron star, and then the forces would obliterate that person. So essentially it looks like actual time travel might be or as pretty likely impossible,

right? Not necessarily. It looks that way based on present scientific knowledge. However, another DaVinci Orion Center Hawking type mind will likely come along at some point and change our understanding of the world around us, possibly in a way that will make time travel suddenly seem possible. So you're saying there's a chance.

Who knows? New advances in quantum theories could perhaps provide some understanding of how to overcome the current time travel paradoxes and limitations. Maybe there's some secret of time exploration, we just haven't thought of yet, like closing our eyes, spinning around a circle really, really fast, while running backwards as fast as you can.

Please try that and let me know if you time travel. That's the luck, yeah? Why, try it. What can, what can it hurt? Scientists all over the world continue to enthusiastically study the nature of time and space. You know, and hopefully they will, they will have some major breakthrough soon.

Now that we've laid out a lot of science, let's look back in time and where all this travel talk comes from, this time travel talk on this very special time suck timeline about time, time, time, time, how many times have I said time today? Let's use the time suck banana sex peel time machine. Go back to some of the first mentions of time and time travel in known history right after a word from one of today's kick-ass sponsors. TimeSuck has brought you today by the Great Courses Plus. Have you ever heard the phrase? You don't know what you don't know. I learned today, I didn't know almost anything about time travel research. One addition to TimeSuck to Great Courses Plus is the perfect place to help fill in

those knowledge gaps. This amazing streaming service offers thousands of lectures on virtually any topic you can think of all presented by top professors. Dive into the human brain, nuclear energy, pirate wars, even playing guitar or the philosophy of Tai Chi. There's a whole world of history, knowledge, and ideas to explore in the great courses plus app makes it easy to watch or listen anytime, anywhere. I highly recommend checking out lecture seven from the course sci-fi, science fiction as philosophy. This lecture is titled Interstellar is Time Travel Possible.

Listen to Professor David Kyle Johns, PhD from King's College, discuss many of the influential time travel stories we talked about today and the various theories they represent like back to the future Dr. Who. And he talks about great shows we didn't talk about today like Quantum Leap such a good show Dr. Sam Beckett little buddy. Al classic Scott baccala so open your mind and sign up for the great courses plus time suckers get an entire month for free. All you have to do is sign up today using the time suck URL head to the great courses

plus dot com slash time suck URL head to the greatcoursesplus.com slash time suck. That's the greatcoursesplus.com slash time suck link in the episode description and in the sponsor page of the time suck app and now time, time line. This episode's timeline is going to start with mythology and fiction and it's going to end with, I'm so sorry, little more science. Meet Saxle been talking about time travel for at least 3,000 years. Several ancient myths to pick characters skipping forward in time from German and Irish folklore to ancient Greek Hindu Hebrew Buddhist and Japanese mythology. It's a very old idea. One of the first mentions of the concept of playing with the concept of time comes from the ancient Greeks,

arriving between 700 and 480 BC. Greeks like to give human-like features to everything. Cronus and Kairos are the two main personifications of time. In Greek mythology, Cronus is a tired, bent, back-old man with a long-grey beard and contrast. Kairos, or Kairos, Kairos is a young man, handsome and energetic. Cronus stands for linear time, or Cronus. There we go. Cronus stands for linear time, meaning that he rules over everything and leads human life so that one event happens after another in a sequence. Without him, our life would be made up of small instances and we might not be able to

easily distinguish between what has happened in the past and what will happen in the future. Chi-Ros, on the other hand, stands for opportunity in the best or right time to act on something. These good moments might not come around that often. They can be short, easily fade away. One of the earliest tales of actual time travel comes from Hindu mythology, the epic poem of, here we go. Mahabata. Mahabata.

Mahabata. Mahabata. Mahabata rata. Circus 700 BC. Some of these words. Fuck me. And maybe written as early as 400 BCE. Yes, certainly. words, fuck me. And maybe written as early as 400 BCE.

Yes, certainly, yes, 700 BCE. This ancient story follows King, King, Kikudmi, and his search for a perfect partner for his daughter, Ravati. Ravati was Kikudmi's only daughter, and he believed that she was so beautiful and will educate that no man would be good enough to marry her.

Despite this, the king did have a few serders, the sewers that he had settled on, but it wasn't good enough. So this led the father and daughter to go on a journey into the heavens to meet with God. They traveled literally into the sky and reached the creator, Brahma's Cloud Palace. When they arrived, Brahma was enjoying a musical performance.

So instead of interrupting, the immortal father and daughter waited until the show ended. When it ended, Brahma saw them, and was like, oh shit, he got to assess something. I didn't even know you're here. And then proceeded to tell them the time runs differently on different planets. And Kakudmi and Ravati were like,

oh, what? Does that mean we missed dinner back home? And then Brahma was like, bro, you missed so many dinners. And they figured out the day, they waited so long and got a time that in their own time, many, many decades had passed. And King, ah,

Kakudmi was like, shit, my wife's gonna be so mad and so old. Fuck, well welcome this morning. Never thought I'd end up with an old angry wife at bedtime. And Brahma told the shot king, oh, King,

the princes that you thought would become the bridegroom of your daughter, all died. Even their sons and grandsons, even all their friends have all passed away. And King, uh, could could me was like, oh, that much time has passed. Oh, thank God. Thank God my angry old wife is dead. That's, that's good news, actually. And of course, you never said that.

Maybe you thought it to comfort them. Brahma did recommend a dude for the lady to marry. Brah, uh, while a Rama, a god and older brother of Krishna. So it worked out pretty good for her in the end. Story explains that when the king was sent back to Earth, he looked around, he noticed that everything had changed, the landscape, the weather, the entire environment, the culture of the people,

and the evolution of men had continued on. King discovered all his friends and relatives and everyone he knew were gone. It all died over, long forgotten centuries of time. He was a total stranger in this future world. What makes this ancient Hindu tale so interesting is that it is exactly what happens to a space traveler who journeys far out into space.

The very old story sinks up time and space in a very modern way. Another famous time travel story come from the Quran and around 250 CE, they're ruled a Roman king called, oh, this fucking name is even Dumber. This is DAQ Y-A-N-O-O-S. Fuck you, Dachuanos. You're viewing your dumb shit name. Anyway, there's a ruled this Roman king called Captain Dumb Shit. He had a pagan ceremony every year. It's a ruled as Roman king called Captain Dumpshit. He had a pagan ceremony every year. Anyway, he's one young man who believed in the oneness of a law of criticized Captain

Dumpshit's pagan worship is inappropriate. He rebelled against the widespread practices. It took place together with some use. He also felt the same way. In order to flee from punishment and persecution, they went into hiding. Eventually came to rest in a cave or a I caused him to sleep for 300 years. So they kind of traveled through time. When they woke up at her centuries of sleeping, their time traveling story came to service which brought travelers to seek them out for blessings. The story was popular in Europe and the Middle East during medieval times.

The story was translated into Latin, made it way into a lot of Christian works as well. And then the popularity of this story decreased after the Renaissance because people got tired of a stupid name. That's what we need. Forget about my two gargoyles or just spinning around really fast. We need to find a magic cave. That's maybe that's what's at the bottom of the Oak Island money pit, a magic time travel cave. There's another story similar to this one that occurs within Christianity around the exact same time 249 CE, according to Christian interpretations, seven young men are accused of following Christianity and suffer persecution at the hand of the Roman emperor, Dichus, way better name than Captain Dumshit.

All day, they were given their time to give up their faith. They chose instead to hide away in a mountain cave to pray, whilst there they fell asleep for centuries. Woke up during the reign of Eastern Roman Emperor Theodosius, the second during his reign of 408 to 450 CE, kind of good name. Theodosius, the second was moved by the sleeper story and consequently all bishops previously charged with believing in resurrection were pardoned. So I guess that was a thing for a while. Japan is also home to at least one ancient time travel story. The story is found in ancient Japanese legends

and is at least 1300 years old, possibly 2000 years old. The story is of Hiroshima, Taro, skilled fisherman, that's what you might call a high moral constitution. One summer evening when Hiroshima was going home after a days fishing, he came upon a children, group of children, torturing a small turtle as Japanese children are apt to do, right? If I had a nickel, for every time I'd come across a story about Japanese kids torturing

turtles, I would have one nickel. Your Shima Taro felt sorry for the poor little turtle. Took it away from the kids, gently put it back in the water. The next morning, gigantic turtle tells him it's a little turtle. He'd saved the day before, was actually the daughter of the emperor of the sea. Reunion. Reunion. Another dumb name.

The emperor wanted to thank your Hashima Taro. So your Hashima went to visit Reunion in this palace under the sea. There he again met the princess of the sea, the turtle he had saved. After three days of staying with the emperor and his daughter, your Hashima Taro became concerned about being away from his elderly parents and friends and other family.

He asked to leave the palace. And then the princess gave him a magic box that would keep him safe, but told him, don't ever open it. And then when Taro returned to his village, he found that 300 years had gone by. Struck by grief, the legend says he opened the box to then find himself rapidly Asian

to a weak and extremely old man. The box, the princess had given him contained his old age. What a fucked up shitty story. It's poor guy, it's poor bastard, helps save a little turtle. And it's rewarded by getting to spend three days in an underwater palace, or it doesn't even say fuck to anybody.

You know, then everybody he knows and loves dies. And then he gets his shitiest box ever. Now, one that puts him on death's door, would he open to it? That's fun. I feel like the real less than that story is, if you see some kids torturing a turtle one that puts him on death story when he opens it. That's fun. I feel like the real less than that story is, if you see some kids torturing a turtle, it's fucking to let him keep torturing it. Don't interfere.

Time travel is all over history. Our next tale on the timeline of time comes from Old Ireland. There's a bit of Irish folk lore to go back into ancient BCE times, but the first transcripts of the sorts of legends, these legends were found in the late 11th and 12th centuries CE. So we don't know exactly how old these stories are, this story. This is the time travel story of Niv and Oshin. Niv, Alas, was one of the queens of a stupid series of Celtic words that translate to the land of the young.

When she first saw Oshin Alad, who was the leader of a warrior band called Diffyana, she thought he was hottest fuck. Perhaps even the most handsome as dude with the cleanest wings you'd ever seen. If you're thinking over for a bit, she decided to sail across the sea and take him back as her lover and then she did, she got that dick. After living an idyllic life for three years with Neve, Oshin became homesick and long to return back to Ireland for his brief visit. Neav explained to him how different time was, you know, where she was and where he used to be in it. Everyone he knew before was now dead. Now she responded by saying, bitch, are you serious? Oshin insisted that he be sent back. Neav finally acquiesced and Oshin was sent off on a white

horse back to Ireland. And here's where some fun time travel rules come into play. Neav gave Oshin strict instructions. They should never touch the ground while there. So dumb, you can go home, don't touch the ground. Is this the story where the childhood game of hot lava came from? When he got to Ireland, O'Shean saw the massive transformations that had taken place over 300 years,

and it blew his hands in a little mind. There was no one there for him to reunite with. So what is, uh, so was sorry. So he was able to see what he wanted without touching the ground initially. That's what I was trying to say. I guess he just pushed up on top of his horse or something. Just, I don't know, took a, took a pee to shoot off top of his horse. I'm sure that was super easy. On his way back to Niav, he offered to help a group of men lift a stone to make a road. Obviously in doing so so he had to get off his horse

and then he instantly turned into the oldest dude who had ever lived. He'd been your Hashimotaroed. On a side note to this, the Oshin character on his journey, he also ran into St. Patrick. Little fucker, we celebrate every March St. Patrick asked Oshin to be baptized to avoid falling into hell, but he chose to retain his pagan beliefs instead. Man, I want to straight trip back home, Oshin had. And now he got confirmation that everyone he knew or loved was dead, except for Niev. He became super duper old and he ended up getting sent to be burnt and to burn in hell forever. Moral that story, never go home. It's not worth the risk.

Also, what I'm learning about these stories is old stories are terrible. Storytelling's gotten way better. Okay, so this is a historical point. There are tons of ideas about time moving forward. stories as old stories are terrible. Storytelling's got way better. Okay, so this historical point, there are tons of ideas about time moving forward. Now, since so far about moving back, historians don't seem to be able to agree on when the earliest concerning moving backwards through time story was written, or the earliest story concerning moving backwards through time was written. Some say it was the work of Samuel Madden's memoirs of the 20th century published in

1733. There's a series of fictional letters written from British ambassadors from the future, now are passed in 1997-1998 to diplomats in the 18th century, conveying the political and religious conditions of the future, because the narrator receives these letters from his guardian angel, author historian, and a man with a PhD in English literature, Paul Alken suggests in his book, Origin to Futuristic Fiction, that the first time travel in English literature is a guardian angel. Madden does not explain how the angel obtains these documents, but Alken exerts that Madden

deserves recognition as the first to toy with the rich idea of time travel in the form of an artifact sent backward from the future to be discovered in the present. This book, by the way, is fucking terrible. I bought it, hoping it would have some hilarious thoughts about what life might be like in the distant future of 1997. It was written as if British ambassadors 1997 were barely literate and just rambled on rarely making any firm observation of anything intelligible. Here's a sample. I, however, I had the pleasure to find that my hopes had not deceived me. And that what I had said now and formally of astronomy has been driven out of Egypt and those packs of his empire, which nature had, as it were, cut out for an observatory, with

a lovely science that made great impressions on in. In short, before we parted, he orders the vizier to take care directly for choosing if it placed, then building it in and down in an astronomical, astronomical college, as I should direct and deferred that I should send for some of the best protestors in Europe to settle there with large honorable provisions. And then it just continues to ramble on like that for several hundred pages. Now one mentioned the heavens gate cult suicide.

Nothing about the cloning of dollars sheep. Now one mentioned the first Harry Potter book being published or Pokemon in the US market. Boring! Next bit of history. Washington Irving, an American writer best known for sleepy hollow. Wrote his famous story Rip Van Winkle in 1819 and it's time travel ish. This famous tale is about a man named Rip Van Winkle. That makes sense.

Falls asleep on top of mountain. Waking 20 years later in the future, not feeling the day older in self. It sounds like one hell of a nap. I bet he woke up feeling so fresh. The Rip Van Winkle story is not to be based on Johann Karl Christoff Nattigals, earlier German folks, Hill Peter Klaus, who passed out from drinking too much wine woke up 20 years later. Another early work about time travel is the Four Bears of Kalameros, Alexander, son of Philip of Macedon, by Alexander Veltman, published in 1836. In this wordy titled book, the main character travels to ancient Greece on the back of a

hippogriff. Fun, meeting characters like Aristotle and Alexander the Great. And then returns to his own time in the 19th century. It's the first known Russian science fiction novel and the first novel ever to use the time travel trope. Yeah, and the narrator rides a hypocrite to get to ancient Greece. And what's a hypocrite? It's a giant legendary creature from ancient Greek legends, which has the front half of a

big ol' eagle and a high and half of a horse, roughly the size of a Clisdale. So now we need to for sure forget about the two gargoyles fucking in chant on a spaceship, travel and speed of light. We need to focus, put all of our energy into finding those hippogriffs. Two years later, a mysterious story with time travel themes is published in 1843. Christmas gets into the time travel spirit. I think this is the first story that first led me to thinking about traveling back and forth in time. Either this or back to the future, the movie. I don't know, I don't think it was a book for that.

When the 1843 Charles Dickensworth Christmas Carol has early depictions of time travel in both directions as its protagonist Ebenezer Scroo, is transported to Christmas his past and future. Time travel is, of course, done via Ghost Magic, but the concept captivated the readers of the time and beds the concept of time travel firmly in the consciousness of the Western world. And maybe this old story led in some way to people like Einstein and spent more time in the very nature of time than they would have if it had been written thanks to the old butterfly effect. You ever think about that? Butterfly effect. More than just a great action-culture movie.

Fuck the critics on Rotten Tomatoes. It's a great film. And it's defined, the butterfly effect is not the movie, within chaos theory, as the sensitive dependence on initial conditions in which a small change, one state of deterministic non-linear system can result in large differences in a later state.

Man, so many, so much wordy concepts in this stuff. Essentially, it just means that a very small change can create a significantly different outcome somewhere down the line. Consumers old analogy were a butterfly flaps in between in Chicago and their tornado later occurs in Tokyo. Not sure if that is true, but I do believe in this concept. You know, in the sense of time travel, you're just being that, you know, while I have no idea this happened, and it probably didn't happen, Einstein could have read a Christmas

Carol as a kid that led him to wondered about the nature of time itself, which could then lead him to focusing a good chunk of his academic intellectual energy on furthering humanity's understanding of time. And then later physicists get inspired by Einstein's teachings and they take our understanding of time further and so on and so forth until someday in the future someone influenced by if you trace it all the way back Dickens' story ends up creating a time machine. I think about the butterfly effect more and more as I get older but the power of ideas fictional ideas even you know can create real changes in the world Now back to time travel.

Another example of backward time travel found in the popular 1861 French book Paris Before Men, written by the French botanist and geologist Pierre Botard published post-humously in the story the protagonist transported to prehistoric past by the magic of a lame demon. French pun on Botard's name where he encounters a please your store and an ape-like ancestor and is able to interact with ancient creatures. I gotta say that demon doesn't sound lame at all. I mean, as far as demons go, the demon taking you back in time, sounds pretty cool. One of the first stories to feature

time traveled by means of a machine is the clock that went backward by Edward Page Mitchell. First appeared in the New York sun in 1881 in this tale, an unusual clock. One wound runs backwards and transports back people back in time. The author does not explain the origin or properties of the clock because, no, it doesn't have to. It's a sweet magic clock, okay? It's just working.

Don't worry about it. Spanish diplomat and author Enrique Gaspar Rimbauiembeau, wrote L, Anacrony, so fucking, he wrote something. He wrote L and Acronopete, an 1887, and it seems to be the first story to feature a vessel engineered to travel through time. Book reviewer Andrew Sawyer commented that the story does seem to be the first literary description of a time machine noted so far, in the sense that, you know, what we've discovered, adding that Edward Page Mitchell's story, the clock that went backward is usually described as the first time machine story, but I'm not sure the clock quite counts.

Eddie Page didn't get some shit for his time travel clock or given some shit, I guess, for this guy's time travel. And Rikie's book is translated as the Anacronopete, and it's a satirical take on time travel, written before HD Wells, starts in Paris in the late 19th century and takes the reader to China Pompeii, Mount Errat, and all the key moments in history. The Anacronopete is an enormous cast iron box

propelled by electricity, which drives four large, pneumatical devices ending in tubes for travel by flying fast against the rotation of Earth, the machine can undo the passing of days. In 1895, the beginning of the modern fast nation really begins with British author H.D. Wells and his popular book The Time Machine. This book is about a London blood pudding baker who falls over a box in his basement, sprains his wrists, can't make a blood pudding very well after that, ends up selling his soul to an elderly gypsy witch who gives him the power to travel back in time and be more careful in the basement. No, it's super dumb.

It's not about that. It's about something better than that. The book is about a Victorian English scientist and gentleman inventor, Livin' Enrichment Surrey, who builds a time machine that at first he doesn't think it works, you know, but then he ends up five hours in the future. He continues to go further and further, ending up in the year 802,701 AD, finding himself in a paradise-type world of a small humanoid creature called Eloi. They are frail and peaceful, given fruit to eat, explores the area, but when he returns, he finds that his time machine is gone. He decides that it's been put inside the pedestal of a nearby statue. He tries to pry it open, but cannot.

During, you know, in the evening, he begins to catch glimpses of strange, white, ape-like creatures, the alloy called morlocks. And then it just gets fucking weirder from there. It's super cool, odd, way better than my blood pudding horse shit, totally dependent on time machine. The book popularized the concept of time travel by mechanical means it has been adapted to three feature films, including the 2002 guy Pierce Film of the same name.

After HG Wells, the Western World of Fiction was often run in with thoughts of time travel, as was the world of science. Ten years after HG Wells, the time machine, Albert Einstein, special theory of relativity, talks about the space time continuum we discussed. Over a decade later, 1916, Einstein discovers that space time is curved. The first application of general relativity to time travel was made by the Scottish physicist W. J. Van Stochem in 1937. Van Stochem imagined in a mathematical form,

because that's how physicists imagined things, an infinitely long, extremely dense, rotating cylinder, Ben Stachem imagined in a mathematical form, because that's how physicists imagined things and infinitely long, extremely dense, rotating cylinder, like an endless barbershop pole. The dense cylinder actually drags space time with it creating a space time whirlpool. In Ben Stachem situation, you could fly up to the cylinder in a spaceship and set a course around the cylinder and arrive back at a point in time before you arrived at the cylinder. Okay, and yes, this is the idea that Tulane astronomy professor and astrophysicist Frank Tippler

built into something equally useless to as far as time travel into time, you know, years later. But I guess because of the butterfly effects, his research could lead to something tangible. I'm glad these guys do what they do, but you could not fucking pay me enough to have to sit through one of their lectures. Like to take a class from one of these guys? Just for years working on equations about theoretical

wormholes, oh fucking I would rather shoot myself. Then be just stuck. It just I flashbacks of taking one coming in and God bless people who can do this because we need you to build the things that I like like all these computers and stuff. I took one computer science class in college and I hated it so much. I thought it was going to be computer science major because I like all this cool stuff. Found it, I have zero interest in doing all the tedious equations shit to make it possible. I made it two weeks and dropped my major. I just remember, I just, listen off all this stuff, makes me think of that professor I had. Just fucking drone in on and his monotone voice,

literally had a pocket protector. It's shirt tucked into his slacks, belt too tight. Belly rubbing up on the chalkboard every time he turned around and then not carrying that he had a chock full of belly, or a chock, a belly full of chalk. And I just, I just, I can't, I can't. A little bit more science get through.

Then we get fun again. I'm doing this because I know it's something you like this, but I fucking hate this. I love doing this show. Hate crunching through all the sides. Also in 1937, mass-matition, Albert Einstein's colleague, Curtin Godel, proposes that a universe itself, maybe a time machine.

What? Godel consider the possibility of all of science, the entire universe is actually rotating like Makata, hey, said it was. Finally, we get fun again. Time is a flat circle. You might ask if everything is rotating, how will we know that?

Well, it turns out that if the universe was rotating, according to general relativity, we'd see laser beams curved slightly as they move through space. If Goatle was correct, it would be possible to create a path on a rotating universe that ended before it began. And goadles rotating universe, the universe itself could function as a time machine. However, later physicists haven't found any conclusive evidence that our entire universe is in fact rotated.

In fact, the evidence points overwhelmingly towards the idea that it's not more numbers need to be crunched. Another step four was made in 1964 when Irish physicists John Stuart Bell proposed a mathematical way to check whether hidden variables or weird non-locality, the idea that entangled particles can communicate faster than speed of light, explain the, quote, unquote, spooky behaviors of quantum particles, acting in the same way at the exact time and any distance, since then scientists have used Bell's tests to demonstrate non-locality. And if you have any idea how to translate what I just said from nerd to common, I don't

have a PhD in mathematics speak, you let me know. Get in love, these big brain nerd guys. Also kind of want to fucking punch up in some lockers right now. 1967, US physicist John Wheeler invents the name Black Hole to describe singularities in space and time Okay, 1974 astrophysicist Frank Tippler. He's back Plots pass around a vast imaginary spin cylinder confirming that past through time can't exist With the unpainted stainless steel body stainless steel body the gold wing doors and the rear mounted engine, the DeLorean sports car first built in 1981.

Production continues until 1983. A unique Irish sports car with a low top speed of only 88 miles per hour, just with the scientists we're looking for. And kidding, its high speed was pretty low though, actually only 110 miles per hour. Not too fast for a sporty looking sports car. Unfortunately for DeLorean founder John Delorean, on October 19, 1982, he was arrested and charged with conspiracy to obtain and distribute 55 pounds of cocaine,

which is quite a bit of cocaine. Delorean was acquitted of the drug charges in 1984, so maybe he didn't do it, but he didn't get back to making cars again. The next year, however, one of his cars would go back to the future. Also in 1985, Carl Sagan, the famed astronomer, cosmologist, astrophysicist, astrobiologist, author, science-populizer, popular riser, science-communicator, and incredibly boring late-show guest.

I watched some of the Johnny Carson appearances, and they are painful. He wrote his highly acclaimed book, Contact, a work of fiction, the book approached both alien contact and time travel in a highly scientific way. Sagan conferred with theoretical physicists, Kip Thorn, over how a machine could travel through space time. Many years later, in an interview by Nova in 1999, Carl Sagan answered the question, how do you feel being responsible for bringing time travel perhaps a step closer? And he answered by saying, I don't know that I brought time travel a step closer. If anyone has its kipthorn, but maybe the joint effort of all

those involved in this debate has at least increased the respectability of serious consideration of the possibility of time travel. As a youngster who is fastened by the possibility of time travel and the science fiction novels of H.G. Wells, Robert Heinlein, and others, to be in any way involved in the possible actualization of time travel. Well, it just brings goosebumps. Of course, we're not really at that stage. We don't know that time travel is even possible. And if it is, we certainly haven't developed a time machine.

But it's a stunning fact that we now have reached a stage in our understanding of nature, where this is even a bear possibility. Fast forward to 1988 in Caltech University's Kipthorn, that American theoretical physicist and noble laureate suggested using wormholes as a possible means of time travel. If we could only find a wormhole Kip, then in 1991, Richard got AKA Dick Gott, AKA dude who probably got beat up a lot as a kid, proves that cosmic strings could be used for time travel while studying at Princeton University. Since the 90s, the interest in research into the mysteries of space time is only increased In 2009 fame super scientists Steven Hawking through a famous cocktail party for time-towers this this party love

Right trudging through that last 20 minutes of science talk makes this worth it for me This is so great that he did this Okay, Hawking's party through he threw a party for time travelers. He really did. He published the party invitation in his mini series into the universe with Stephen Hawking. Hawking hopes to lure futuristic time travels. It said, you are cordially invited to a reception for time travelers. And then along with that, there was the date, time, and coordinates for the event. The theory Hawking that, there was the date, time, and coordinates for the event. The theory Hawking explained was to lure someone from the future. Only someone from the future

would be able to attend. He was about the time he published this event had already occurred. There was a real party, complete with champagne, food, and a sign that read, Welcome Time Travelers, unfortunately no one showed up. What a shame Hawking said I was hoping a future Mrs. Universe was going to step through the door. I love this guy. Love that he did that. Love that he had food and drink prepared and waited to see if anybody would show up for a party.

He knew he would publish an invitation about later that he knew someone in the future could read and then go back to before he published a book at a 10th party. Ah, an interview in 2012, Hawking said that Einstein's theory of relativity laid the groundwork for the possibility of time travel. But that warping space and time could trigger a bolt of radiation that would destroy not only the spaceship trying to travel through time, but possibly the space time could continue continue him itself. Shit, how much for that suck? If we finally built a machine that mathematically, you know, made time travel itself, you know, possible, it was gonna work, but then during its maiden flight,

it collapsed the entire fucking universe in on itself. That's actually very darkly hilarious to me. My thousands and thousands and thousands of years of research all built up to this one big moment and then that one big moment turns off Some giant light switch in the sky in space a light switch you could only turn back on if you had a time machine Which you can't because the time machine is what turned the light off forever With that there's still a lot of time to suck on but now we are gonna bounce out of this time suck timeline

Good job soldier. You've made it back. Barely. Before we continue our exploration of this suck on time, it is at the Internet, coming up soon. A word from our final sponsor of the day. Time suck has brought to you today once again by old Klondike's, Sluse Discovery Service. No one is better at finding anything you've lost including time travel technology and or time travel secrets than old Klondike. Hey nerds, they in slow short, you can call me old Klondike. You may recall me from the real gun and suck over half of my head and the lost technology suck. And I have, I don't

be the time traveler myself to get to year's suck today, I reckon. Now for the pleasantries, let's get right to business. Time machines. They can be anywhere. Food and writing home backyard. Let's start digging and sleuthing. Here's my deal. I'll dig up your backyard or your front yard. Or if you're not home, your neighbor's yard.

If you find me a time machine, I'll hand it right to you. No question to ask. All I ask is that I get to keep winning gold silver if I'm there for myself. It's a fair deal and I'll hand it right to you. No question to ask. All I ask is that I get to keep winning gold silver if I'm there for myself. It's a fair deal and you won't find none square. You get to keep any time as a stranger, old chests or safe foot, old drawings or blueprints and such of equations and whatnot. And I get those sparkling minerals.

Set me upon your dirt and you'll be rich and lickety split. I swear it's true. Everything I say is true. My name is an old Klondike. Chit me upon your dirt and you'll be rich in liquidy split. I swear it's true. Everything I say is true. My name is an old Klondike. Times like there's no way time to cleanse old Klondike. And please keep mine when you consider retainative services that his name is not in fact old Klondike.

And of course, that is not today's final sponsor. Felix Grayis. Times like his brought you today by Felix Gray. The average American blasts their eyes with big screens, bright screens for 11 hours every day. I'll smash that today because due to travel, I need to record next week's time, select tomorrow and the secret suck tomorrow.

I'll put in 12, 14 hours of screen time easy today and tomorrow, that's a lot of screen time. In our modern world, you can't avoid screen time. You can't stop looking at screens when everything is digital, but you can protect your eyes with a pair of Felix Gray, blue light filtering glasses available with or without a prescription. Felix Gray glasses filter out 90% of high energy blue light and eliminate the glare coming off those screens. So you can live your

life without tired, dry eyes, blurry vision and headaches. Unlike other blue light filtering glasses, Felix Gray uses proprietary blue light technology embedded into the lenses. So there's no coding on them and they're stylish. I wore mine a ton during most of the research for this suck. I wear the clear frame to kelvents, quite often to love them. I've got numerous flight attendant compliments on them with all my traveling and despite a lot of computer time, no more ice train. Hail Nimron.

So I'm going another day looking at screens without the help of some Felix Grace, go to FelixGrayGlasses.com slash time suck for free shipping and 30 days of risk free returns or exchanges. That's FelixGrayGlasses.com slash time suck. Link in the episode description and in the sponsor page of the time suck app. Now back to the present. Okay, meat sex. So far we've explored the scientific possibilities of time travel, plus the myriad of different

ways that movie makers and authors have imagined it. Plus we traced the concept back to as far as 3000 years ago and several cultures. Moving forward, we're going to check out what perhaps our government knows about secret taxpayer-funded time travel experiments. Illuminati! Plus, we learned about several awesome, not wackadoodle at all folks who claim to be time travels Time travelers people who did not show up receiving a Hawkins party We'll also look at a couple strange pieces of what some call a time traveling device

We'll have some fun with edits of the internet and we'll end up you know with a few closing thoughts from a couple of experts Let us begin with the government and some of the conspiracies that involve secret time-traveled experiments, first up to famed Philadelphia experiment, also sometimes called Project Rainbow. The story goes that on October of 1943, at the Philadelphia Naval Shipyard, an experiment was conducted aboard a US Navy Canon class destroyer escort called the USS Eldridge number DE173. The Philadelphia experiment involved the creation of a force field which rendered the ship invisible both to the eye and to radar. The experiment was supposedly witnessed by hundreds, possibly thousands of sailors both to shore and other ships nearby. Unfortunately, severe side effects affected the crew on board the ship. Some sailors were said to be found materialized inside the metal of the ship and true sci-fi

horror movie fashion and they were still alive. Even other legs or arms were sealed to the deck. Sounds super legit. Others were never seen again. Still others were driven insane or plagued for years by a mysterious case of phasing in and out of existence. Man, I'd be a bummer.

You know, you go to the doctor's office to get treated and then you phase out of existence for a while by telling me phase back and you missed your appointment. Hours later, there were reports of the elder's appearing in the Norfolk, Naval shipyard in Virginia before reappearing just as suddenly back in Philadelphia. And by reports, I mean, people have said there were reports, but there probably weren't any. So what does this have to do with time travel? Well, many of the same people who believe this happened spoiler alert.

I really don't think it did. Believed that the Philadelphia experiment was just one of many experiments in project rainbow that dealt with among other things, teleportation, and of course time travel. And why am I so dismissive about the reality of the Philadelphia experiment? Well, because a few paranormal investigators actually figured out exactly where this persistent Russian sleep experiment type legend started.

And if you wanna know that story, well, we'll have to do an entire suck in the Philadelphia experiment because it's a long and interesting tale. In typical Navy fashion, everything has been denied. Damn you, builder burger, Rothschild Knights, tempered new world order, bathroom, airship, Denver Airport Building,

naughty poop pantses. Albert Einstein is connected with the Philadelphia experiment. Of course he is. The legend is that he did figure it out. How do you time travel? Figure it out. And of course, he shared that knowledge

with the US military industrial complex who've been hiding it ever since. Einstein also connected with another government time travel conspiracy, known as Project Montauk, as our few of the wacky details will meet in a few minutes. As far as government cover-ups go to Montauk project or Project Montauk, Montauk for some is the most well guarded secret government project that has ever existed. The Montauk experiments were supposedly carried out camp hero or Montauk Air Force station and

Montauk New York, which according to believers, is basically the area 51 of New England. Stories about the project's time travel experiments, use of alien technology and research into telekinesis have managed to both enthrall and terrify conspiracy theorists since the government shut down the Ross Wall of the North's supposed experiments in the early 80s. Theories about the Montauk projects's US government time travel research program intersect with multiple alleged secret government programs, including, as we mentioned, the Philadelphia Experiment. One of the time travel stories about project Montauk is that at some point, through a bit of psychic time tunnel creation, government psychics, opened portals to time

travel. But then instead of sending government agents into these portals to folks at Project Montauk, kidnapped local homeless people, gave them a crash course in time traveling and then just fucking threw them in the tunnel. And no one ever returned. Do I think any of this ever happened? No, I do not. Why? Because the entire legend of Project Montauk can be traced to one wackadoodle, Preston Nichols, a dude who started claiming in the eighties after remembering, quote unquote, a bunch of for sure real shit based on repressed memories, recovered during the hypnosis sessions. Fuck how much bullshit is originated in those goddamn repressed memories recovered through

hypnosis, a bit of psychological quackery that has been debunked over and over again, good old false memory, syndrome striking again. And again, yeah, he thinks, you know, all this stuff happened, all of these, you know, he remembers all of these project montage secrets, you know, via these repressed memories. So, ah, I don't think so. Again, to explore the mythology

of the origin of project montage, we need to make it probably part of a different stock. Maybe it can be combined with a Philadelphia experiment suck for a really fun, you know, investigation into wackadoodle mythology origins. As you know, as I get about all the wackadoodle nonsense that is originated with recovered memories, if I could have found press and nickels before he died in December of 2018, I would have thanked him.

Project Montauk is the inspiration for the Netflix show Stranger Things. Supposedly, it's original working title was Project Montac. So, thanks for making up a weird story that led to a really great TV show. There are lots of other government time travel conspiracies and we'll hit on some of them as we go through a list of nine different time travel wackadoodles. Then we'll revisit one or two of them

in a fun little idiots of the internet. So let's look at these wackadoodles. Ah, that's what I'm waiting for. This is what I've been chomping to the bit for this whole episode. Okay. So this first guy is Dr.'m waiting for. This is what I've been chomping to the bit for this whole episode. Okay. So this first guy is Dr. David Lewis Anderson. He wasn't a time traveler, but he spoke as if he was on the verge of creating time travel

technology. He was not. There are zero mainstream scientists who agree with any of his claims. During 2009, 2010, Dr. David Lewis Anderson stepped forward in the public arena with some compelling dialogue about time travel Armed with a tight 90 style website and the gift of soft spoken articulate communication Which left his audience to spellbound Dr. Anderson made the rounds at various radio shows like coast to coast Now the art bell. He also had a Facebook page all that's true much of what he said is not true According to a third person bio that was likely written by Anderson himself, David Lewis

Anderson was born in Whearton, West Virginia. He's a physicist who's an interest in space, time, physics, special relativity, and global community service. That third one's a nice touch. Global community service. He's not just the smartest man who ever lived. The only man to figure out, you know, how to get close to travel into time. He's also an incredibly nice and generous guy who just wants to do a little community service, not

just for America, but for the whole globe. How about he throws that one out for the ladies, you know, I can just picture this dude, hanging around at a hotel bar after some kind of whack-a-doodle convention, you know, wearing some kind of custom jacket that looks vaguely scientific and military, maybe some NASA patches and also some Navy SEAL patches, and then some patchy made up for some secret organizations that don't exist. Just saying, you're like, oh, what do I do?

Well, I dabble in a little bit of space time physics and really, special relativity. I'll pay the bills, but I guess if I had to say what my passion is, it would be global community service. I just like making people happy. Speaking of which, I wish I could go to Smile on an Angel's face by purchasing to find cocktail for a beautiful lady. Anderson claims to have received degrees in engineering, physics and philosophy as a student graduating with honors from West Virginia University, California State University, the joint services, military college, and also the University

of Minnesota. He went to a lot of universities, guys. Says it was employed at a young age by the United States Air Force, conducting advanced research and deployment, or I'm sorry, in development, the prestigious Air Force flight test center, Edwards Air Force based in the Mojave Desert. Yeah, not only did he get in you guys, he was taking in extra young, okay? The prodigy.

He does seem to have been maybe, based on pictures of him in uniform, actually in the Air Force, but I guess he could have faked those. Anderson later claims to have founded an organization called the TTRC, the Time Travel Research Center, located along on the New York. Said to propose several new details on theories

for reversing time at sublight speeds. And then he also, you know, just no big deal. Lay the foundations for what would later become known as the time-warped field theory. An approach that modeled and described how to use the natural forces of inertial frame dragging for power generation and to create contained and controllable fields of close time-like curves. No big whoops, you just made a space donut. We talked earlier. You did it, figured it out. Fucking whatever. Anderson provided one of the first comprehensive overviews of the historical views of time, time control, and time travel, and a documentary called Time Travel, Journeys Into Time.

It's on YouTube. You should watch it if you like really shitty motion graphics and scene transitions. I swear to God, it looks like it was made in 1990 by a high school intern at some local public access station and like a small city in the Midwest. It looks like it was made recently for adult swims, Tim and Eric, awesome show, great job. You'd think of this guy who's smart enough to figure out all the time travel stuff, he could make a decent video or know how to hire somebody to make a decent video. No one's heard from the students several years and of course those who believe his claims

have been on the edge of time travel breakthrough. They think that he just figured it out. Now he's just bouncing around in the space-time continuum, you know, making more sweet bids. Next up, Andrew Carlson, this is a fun one. Man named Andrew Carlson was arrested for insider trading and tried to beat the charge by attributing his financial success, not to accessing confidential company information

and then buying stocks based on that info. No, he made a lot of money, correctly predicting massive stock jumps because he made a lot of money correctly, predicting massive stock jumps because he was a time traveler. Of course, he's not a time traveler. Actually, in this case, he wasn't even a real person. This whole story of Andrew Carlson

was created by the weekly world news, the most tabloid of all tabloids. The tabloid that keeps the world updated on the goings-ons of Batboy. And just like some people believe in Batboy, some people also believe in time traveling Andrew Carlson. A 2003 weekly world news article red federal investigators have arrested and ignited enigmatic Wall Street whiz on insider trading charges. Incredibly, he claims to be a time travel traveler from the year 2,256. Sources at the

Security and Exchange Commission confirmed that 44 year old Andrew Carlson offered the bizarre explanation for the uncanny success in the stock market after being led off in handcuffs on January 28th. We don't believe this guy's story. He's either a lunatic or a pathological liar says an SEC insider, but the fact is with an initial investment of only $800 and two weeks time, he had a portfolio valued at over $350 million. Every trade he made capitalized on unexpected business developments, which simply can't be pure luck. The only way he could pull it off is with illegal inside information.

He's going to sit in a jail cell on Riker's Island until he agrees to give up his sources. Sounds legit. That's how, you know, people talk like actors playing tough guys in a shitty movie full of contrived wooden dogs. He got to send a cell and rot until he gives up his sources. You can print that. Despite the story's tabloid origins and the fact that it was initially covered nowhere, but in the weekly world news. The story later shut up in a variety of magazines and newspapers reprinted verbatim, but now listed as a real news item.

Real example of fake news. To the amusement and consternation of the FBI and US Security and Exchange Commission officials, they were flooded with the rash of inquiries from journalists seeking confirmation about this bit of fiction. These spokesman at the US Security and Exchange Commission in Washington said, the story is pure fantasy. There is no truth in it at all. This is the kind of story that belongs in the same file as Elvis Shrine found on Mars. And then he continued, you know something?

We've had an enormous number of calls from the media on this one. It has been absolutely amazing. Of course we had to look into it, but as far as we know, it's just not true. In a follow-up article in the April 29th, 2003 issue, the Weekly World News reported that the mysterious time traveling Andrew Carlson had been bailed out by an unidentified benefactor who pointed up a mill- who ponied up a million dollars, then jumped bail before an April 3rd court hearing and disappeared without a trace. Yeah, I just, I, he just bounced back out into time. This next guy is real, and he's made a name for himself.

Not just as a supposed time traveler, but in the UFO community as well. Billy Meyer Socken was born February 3rd, 1937, is a citizen of Switzerland. Also, the extremely credible source of many controversial UFO photographs and time travel tales. He's presented photographs as evidence to support claims that he is in contact with a group of extraterrestrials. And I highly recommend doing a Google image search for Billy Meyer, M-E-I-E-R, UFO photographs. Holy shit.

They're so bad. They're fantastic. They are so blatantly obviously faked. I mean, it looks like he just dangled a toy flying saucer like out in front of a camera after he went out into the woods. Like just dangled in front of the camera so I'm like fishing line or something.

And then took pictures of the forest. You know, the forest in the background and then there's way too perfect, way too in focus. Super hokey toy-like looking saucer. Just floating in the middle of the screen. It's fucking terrible. It just makes me sad that I get a lot of people like, oh my god, it's proof. And people believe this clown.

He's still live at 82, still living in Switzerland, sockets reports regular contact with extra terrestrials. He calls the Plygerin. Myer claims that the Plygerin looks similar in appearance to humans from northern Europe, okay? And states that the Plygerin looks similar in appearance to humans from Northern Europe, okay? And states that the Plygerian home world is called era. It is located in a dimension, which is a fraction of a second shifted

from our own dimension about 80 light years beyond the Pleiades and open star cluster. Pleiades, Sackens claimed that his first extra terrestrial contact occurred in 1942 at the age of five with an elderly extraterrestrial man named Svoth. Contacts with Svoth lasted until 1953, shortly before Svoth passed away. From 1953 to 1964, Myers' contacts continued with an extraterrestrial woman named Osket, who is not a Pajaran.

He's talking a lot of different aliens. Myers says that after an 11 year break, contacts resumed again, beginning on January 28th, 1975, with an extraterrestrial woman named Smajasa, the grandfather's father. Mayer says that he also has had many contacts with another plagiaran man called Patah. Started in 1975, continuing right up to the present day.

He probably talked to Patah today. He probably haven't coffee with Patah tomorrow. He says he's been on board their ships, flown around space, also of course, travel to time. He talks about a bunch of cool stuff like this on his not janky doll website, Myersauken.info, MEIERSAKEN. Another problem with Socken's claims besides the really bad, obviously fake photographs, is the fact that many of his other photos, offering proof of alien life,

have been taken from magazines, TV and other media, like obviously taken, like knowing whatever figure that out. He said he had some pictures of these alien women he's been talking to, and it was just, it was a fucking, there were photos of attractive female humanoids from a 1970s sci-fi show.

He's like, no one's gonna pick that up. Another photo of a petrosaur supposedly taken on a mire traveled back in time on a plagiaran spaceship, was just a photo of an illustration in a book about dinosaurs. Some people have even pointed out that a purported interstellar spaceship

looks a lot like a bunch of Christmas tree ornaments glued on top of the lid of a garbage can. Which is exactly what it does look like, because I'm sure that's what it is. But he has followers, he has people who believe him. Meyer found his own UFO cult called the free community of interest for the border and spiritual sciences.

And you follow, you filogical studies. Fuck this guy. He doesn't seem to have any members in his actual cult that I can find out. He claims to be the direct reincarnation of prophets, Enak, Elijah, Isaiah, Jeremiah, Jesus and Muhammad. Didn't know all those guys were related. I really wanted to do an edit to the internet on this guy, but all the decent videos in the

comments underneath them are in Swiss. Oh my gosh dang. Luckily there's still a bunch of other time traveling in wannabes that we get to go through. This next story, maybe even more fun. Story of Rudolph Fence was for many decades considered to be an unsolved mystery as well as a case of possible time travel. According to the tale, in June 1950, a man suddenly appeared in the center of New York City's Times Square as zipped from out of the blue.

He was wearing old-fashioned clothes, sported the kind of mutton-chop sideburns that had gone out of fashion decades ago, glancing around, look first of astonishment and then of panic, flashed across his face, he began to sprint, and then was struck down and killed by a car. When police examined the man, they found 19th century money in his pockets, as well as business cards identifying him as Rudolph Fence. But they couldn't locate records of the man named Fence anywhere until they came across the widow of Rudolph Fence, Jr. The widow told them that her father-in-law Rudolph Fence, Sr. had disappeared without a trace in 1876, intriguingly the address of her father-in-law matched the address on the mysterious

stranger's business cards. So the police were left with an enigma. Rudolph Fence appeared to have vanished in 1870s, 1876, only to reappear in 1950. Had he fallen into a time hole or wormhole or poop hole? That had sucked him 74 years through time? What the flipping heckosh dinks? It's crap, it's going on around here. For decades, this tale was very popular among members

of Europe's paranormal research community. It was generally accepted as true, an example of a genuine mystery until 2005, when researcher and professional party pooper Chris Abek investigated the story. Abek discovered that the tale had begun as a science fiction story penned by Jack Fanny published in a 1951 fiction anthology two years later a writer named ralf hall and reprinted the exact same story did doing so without permission and then and had removed all indication that the story was fiction what the flip ralf you bamboozled this buddy ralf hall was a member of a group nergang called borderland it was committed to promoting belief in

the existence of a fourth dimension. The fan story when presented as fact, served this agenda through Holland's book, The Tale of the Axial Time Traveler made its way in Europe where it soon took root, circulated for decades within the European Paranormal Research Community. Fasting, I love, I love what a mystery like that gets solved. Love finding the origin of fantastical tales like that. The next time travel mystery story happened to a real fighter pilot who if you feel like taking his word for it did travel through time. Victor Goddard was a Royal Air Force wing commander on a flight from Edinburgh,

Scotland flying to his home base in Andover, England. One day while he was flying to Edinburgh from Andover, he decided to take a route that flew him over Drembs Scotland and when he passed over a dilapidated airfield in Drem In airfield constructed during World War one that had been converted into a farm where folies was overgrown and hangars were falling apart Something ought to happen He encountered a bizarre storm his plane became engulfed in the high winds of the storm strange brown yellow clouds Then he suddenly lost control the plane and began to fall. God it was sure he was seconds away from crashing to the ground and then suddenly he emerged from the strange clouds into a brilliant bright sunlit sky.

He was still flying over the old dream airfield however it looked very different. The hangers which were falling apart now seem to be brand new. The airbase was no longer abandoned. There were four airplanes on the ground these planes were painted yellow color, which was never the color of the Royal Air Force. Not in 1935, he spotted three familiar biplanes. One looked unfamiliar to him. The fourth airplane was a monoplane, which RAF didn't even have in 1935. What the hell was going on? He saw mechanics on the ground. But they weren't dressed like RAF mechanics. While the uniform of RAF mechanics was an overall brown dress, these mechanics were dressed

in overall blue uniforms. Then the storm once again engulfs his plane. A short time later he managed to burst out of the strange clouds yet again, made his way back to and over. We made it back to and over. Everything looked as it should. So what happened? Someone come to believe he'd experienced a time slip. What he witnessed at

Dremme Airfield did not exist in 1935, however it did exist in 1939. The RF was equipped with everything that Goddard had spotted four years earlier then. The RF did start painting their planes yellow. A new model plane was introduced to the airbase, air base. The mechanics overalls were updated to the color blue. Drem was once again converted into a working air base in 1939. So did Goddard accidentally slip into the future while flying through a weird storm? Probably not. Most think he did it to get attention. No corroborating reports were made of by anyone of a giant swording vortex appearing in

the sky above Drem that day. We have only Goddard's anecdotal account to go on. And it's very important to note that he first wrote the story 16 years after the fact when his future vision of 1939 would have been 12 years in his past. And then he published a book about the event 40 years after it supposedly took place. Way more credible if you would have publish an article or book about what he saw in the future when it was still the fucking future. Fun little side note, I have to leave in the RAF and writing about his hair raising flight. Goddard went on to become a noted figure in the UFO community, coining the term uphology. He's also supposedly taken a photograph of a ghost and

claims to have given a hand job to a lonely Sasquatch in the woods for months and also claims to have once won a best barbecue contest by cooking up some pulled chupacabra. Kidding about everything after the ghost photo, of course. We'll jump into an it is the internet that talks about Goddard, or at least, you know, he's referenced in the video where we get the comments from here in just a bit. Now let's get into an even weirder tale. The tale of John Taitour. John Taitour claimed he was sent from the future on a mission to retrieve an antique computer. Sounds legit

already. Taitour talked with thousands of people online, told them stories of a futuristic life from 2036. Many of his tales warned of imminent disaster for the world, but he said he couldn't help. Sorry, guys. Can't help, I can't interfere. As abruptly as he appeared tighter vanish in 2001, did he finish his mission? Who or what is behind the legend of John tighter? Title our first popped up on July 29th, 1998. And there's no way to know how to pronounce his name because he no one, no one, he never showed up anywhere to say it. He first popped up July 29th, 1998 through two faxes sent to Mr. Art Bell, host of the overnight talk show Coast to Coast AM. The faxes to tell him to discover your time travel in

2034 and devastation following the Y2K disaster. Art Bell would read the second of the two faxes on air said, let me explain Mr. Bell. I sent a fax with this opening on July 29th, 1998. As I said, then I am a time traveler. I have been on this world line since April of this year, and I plan to leave soon. Typically time travelers do not purposely affect the world lines they visit. However, this mission is unusually long, and I've grown attached to some of the people I have met here. In the other facts, Tidor introduced himself more. Greetings. I am a time traveler from the year 2036.

I am on my way home after getting an IBM 5100 computer system from the year 1975. I love to have to stop in the 90s to give back home. That's kind of weird. My time is like it's a road. Like you gotta drive through a year or something. My time machine is a stationary mass, temporal displacement unit,

manufactured by General Electric. Sweet, gee, just making time machines. The unit is powered by two topspin dual positive singularities that produce a standard offset tipler sinewite. I will be happy to post pictures of the unit. And we go with tipler again, Professor Time travel with this crazy tunnel fucking thing. And why would you go back to 1975 to pick up a computer?

Can you just get it from a computer collector in 2036? And it seems kind of like a frivolous way to use a time machine just to go shopping for hard to find items, you know? It's fuck, I'm in! Every time I come in this record store, they've just sold out of the limited pressing of Michael Motherfucker McDonald's hot 84 record

if that's what it takes. If that's what it takes. If that's what it takes, I don't need to know anymore. And no doubt about it. That's what I came here for. If that's what it takes. Now got McDonald again. I did, I did, I did, I did pump myself up with little McDonald's. Good luck getting that jingle out of your brain. You're going to need a time machine to go back before I said that and fucking skip that part.

Conversations between Tito and posters on Art Bell post to post. That's cute. There's a little uh, you know, posting board on the on the on the intrawebs that goes along with coast to coast. They continue for the next few months. Titer talked of imminent problems across the world beginning in 2004. The cancellation of the Olympics, which I totally forgot about. I totally forgot about the Olympics were canceled. The splitting of the United States into war infections. Damn it.

Also forgot about that. An epidemic of a crits felt Jacob disease. Can't believe I forgot about that super rare brain disease. No one talks about. And he also warned of a series of Russian nuclear strikes. It happened in 2015 that devastated all major US cities, along with the European Union and China. And I feel really stupid.

I completely forgot about getting obliterated. I lived in LA in 2015. God dang. Titer admits he lives in a parallel timeline, one that varies one to two percent from hours. Enough to slightly be, to be slightly different, but not diverge from the major societal events.

Titer's story eventually falls apart with answers becoming more inconsistent in tourists, and then the Art Bell chatroom users, or the Art Bell chatroom user, whoever is doing these John Titer posts, quits posted in April 2001, because he probably gets bored. Don't think for a second that none of his predictions becoming true has made people stop believing in him. Ah, no way. The tighter story continues to grow. His conversations are reposted on other sites and through email lists with tighter fever

reaching a peak in 2003, clueless with a release of a book called John Tider, a time travelers tale, and it continues to this day. People still believe in this guy. The next tale comes with a supposed video evidence. Could it be more credible? No, it will not be. Will it be more fun? Maybe the story is amazing.

On August 30th, 2006, a Swedish man with great imagination named Hakan Nordfitsk. Nordfitsk says he returned to his home from his job to find the kitchen sink pipe, kitchen sink pipe, kitchen sink pipe, spilling out water all over the floor. In order to fix the pipe, he gathered his tools, opened the sink cabinet as he peeked into the cabinet, a bright light showed him a path inside the cabinet. Then he realized the cabinet had converted into a time tunnel, right? Sweet cabinet.

All my cabinet does is have, you know, or is not have the crackers I want when I want no Don't have some fun rids. Where's a ritz? How am I supposed to eat summer sausage? Well, I got hold of my hands like an animal. I can't make a tiny little cracker sandwich and eat like a distinguished gentleman Anyway, Nort vitz kept crawling on this path realize that you led the future right his little cabinet time tunnel path led him to 2042 I mean where he was surprised to meet a 72 year old version of himself. Apparently his life hadn't progressed much, you know, if 17 year old or 72 year old him was fucking still chilling by the same ass or same old ass cabinet. My god, man, the seventh episode has

me jumbled. Can't speak at all today. At first, he claims he couldn't believe what he was seen. I hope not to be weird to pop out of a cabinet time tunnel, seeing your 70-year-old self and just think, yeah, this checks out. This feels right. Hakan claims he did a lot of tests on the older version of himself to confirm the truth. He says that 2042 him knew all the secrets of his early life like where he had hid stuff when he was in first grade or what the score was of some soccer match he played in the summer of 88. Above all, the man had the impression of some soccer match he played in the summer of 88.

Above all, the man had the impression of the same tattoo he had, just a little more faded with time. Acon became convinced that he did indeed meet his future self. To prove it was all real, he filmed conversations with himself on his phone. In the video, the two of Acon's can be seen, spent on a good time, you know, having a good time with one another,

laughing, talking, comparing tattoos, smiling cheerfully. Acon Nordkvitz would later say, quite simply, I met myself there in the future and had a great time. And I don't really care what other people think. Like care, what other people say, Haqon, and the ones who don't easily fall for bullshit, all think or all say, you're full of that bullshit. The entire scene of Haqonn Nordkvitz talking to himself was part of a viral campaign conducted by an insurance company to promote the benefit of pension plans.

And again, he just passed this along as if people would fall for it, which I guess, you know, not a bad plan because they did use this footage from an insurance company, you know, viral marketing campaign to make a lot of people think that he actually did fucking go through a weird cabinet time tunnel and talk to his future self. Okay, two more. This next dude is a trip back in 2016. He also ran for president in the United States. He's the first, first US presidential candidate that I know of to claim to be a time traveler.

He's also part of the it to the internet feature today. Andrew J. Basiago, interging dude from Seattle, lawyer, lawyer, turn political hopeful and complete wackadoodle. Basiago ran as an independent, cited his extensive experience travel through time as one of his strongest qualifications for presidential office. According to an article in the Huffington Post, if he was elected, Basiago would have disclosed how extraterrestrials are visiting Earth and discuss the ramifications of the advent of ET human contact within the first 100 days. I love, so I love that he think that he's claiming that he knows his knowledge.

He's like, I'm not going to tell you, I won't tell you unless you make me present. You make me present? I'll tell you where the aliens are, but not a peep. If I don't get elected among the highlights of Basia goes time traveling exploits, hearing Abraham Lincoln's Gettyburg address firsthand when he traveled back to 1863 at the age of 10. And he also visited Mars, where President Obama was hanging out. You know, I mean, you met him up,

and everyone President Obama was hanging out in Mars. This guy seems fun. Too bad he didn't give a honest A, but a little heads up when he went back there, right? And, you know, maybe say like, hey, don't go watch our American cousin at Ford's Theater in Washington, DC ever. All right, last alleged time traveler.

Let's talk about Paul Denos and his diary. On some very crystally websites, you can find stories about Paul Amadeus Denos astral projecting time traveling, um, or, you know, you can find stories about a guy who just had one hell of a fever dream that he wrote about when he woke up. In 1921, Paul Amadeus Denosch, a Swiss Austrian teacher with fragile health fell into a coma that would last a year when Denosch awakened knowing that he didn't have much time left, hoping that a mild climate would improve his condition. He moved to Greece, starts teaching French in German language lessons.

After two years, few months before he dies, he hands his personal diary to his favorite student, George Papachis, a later prominent professor of law and director of Pantheon University of Greece without telling him what the notes are. As this guy progressed with his translations, he discovered that his teacher had an amazing story. During the one year long coma, DaNosh's consciousness had supposedly inexplicably sit into the year 3,906 AD, entered the body of another man, and then Denash records

this, you know, he got the fuck. Denash records mankind's history in the forthcoming centuries from the nightmare of overpopulation of world wars up until the world changing globalization, the radical new administration system, the colony on Mars, the next human evolutionary stage, a lot of info in this book from each sex you want to explore this dude. Sounds like fever dreams to me, but you know, you can dig if you want to explore further. You can get his book Chronicles from the Future, The Amazing Story of Paul Amadeus Tenocht. Reviews of this book are pretty mixed.

Let's look at a few of them to kick off today's idiots of the internet. Idiots of the internet. Okay, let's look at what some random folks think about the stories of several of supposed time travelers we've just gone over. Starting with the diary of Paul Amadeus Denosch, Amazon reviewer ATP Cliff seems to really want this book to be true, given it five stars and saying it sounds legit. Even while admitting that Paul's visions of the future have not shown themselves to be true in any way. Cliff's five star tidal line is probably a different timeline than our current timeline and the rationalization begins.

Cliff writes, very interesting description of a possible timeline future of our earth. I think the timeline we are experiencing currently is different than the one in this book. The reason I think we are in a different timeline is that our current timeline is, in my opinion, much more technologically advanced than the timeline in the book. Holy shit. Yeah, we're just in a different timeline then Paul. Or this book is garbage or that. Just what a rationalization to listen. I know that the future portrayed in this book is not what's happened at all. But don't think that that discredits it. That's just, listen, it's just an altar and timeline. That's all. Paul for sure went to the future.

He just went to a parallel future. And he forgot to mention that. You know, everyone makes mistakes. Even people who for sure have traveled their time. Cliff continues, God granted us free will. So all of our actions every day are important and the impact our future. I believe our actions since the author returned from the future have changed the timeline. I don't know if the changes will have a major or minor effect, so I don't know if our current timeline future will be similar or wildly different than

the future described in this book. And nothing is going to make Cliff think this book isn't true. I love that he doesn't fucking care if any of the events in the book line up at all. He's like, that doesn't bother me at all. I still think it's true. Yeah, I just want to believe that he traveled in the future. And so I'm going to believe that. Man, if I ever start a legit cult, I want to find Cliff and a lot of other people like Cliff.

Man, once you can get a cliff on your side, it seems like you can do anything. Or you can say whatever you want, do whatever you want. There's gonna stand by you. I mean, sure Dan took my wife from me and makes me sleep in the dog kennel and work all day and then giving my money, which uses the bilongeray for the wife I had that now he has.

I get it. That's how cults work. That's not the way he described it to me initially, but sometimes co-leaders change their minds. And that's God's will. And I I get it five stars five stars for the cult An anonymous customer also gave the book five stars because it has beautiful colors. They wrote This is a truly interesting read. It is a spiritual journey to the future irrelevant if the story is true or not. What the fuck? How is that not relevant?

The dream is beautiful. The colors are bright and the story is true or not. What the fuck? How is that not relevant? The dream is beautiful. The colors are bright and the story is unique. The message is positive and future is bright beyond imagination. Well, is it bright? You just said you don't even know if it's true or not. So why do you think it's bright? If true, there is nothing to be afraid, just relax and enjoy. I strongly recommend as an odd and intriguing mental experience. How many yoga retreats do you have to go on before you start saying shit like this? How many meditation centers do you have to visit? Before you start telling people you enjoy a book because of the beautiful colors, the dream within it.

How do you not fucking care whether or not a book about one man's claim of visiting the future is true. That's the premise of the book. Not all reviewers took a disease on the book. Plenty of one star reviews as well, such as this one from I love books whose title line reads in all caps, if it were possible to give it less than one star, I would liken it, liken it. I love books.

Are they right? Where to begin? If Adolf Hitler went to a future heaven and found his perfect Nordic future, this is a contender. There are nothing but one hilarious problem after another to tell you right off the bat that this is a very poorly written novel of the future. There are a few anachronisms that any student in World War one would notice, but that is least of the problems.

There is not one centilla of an idea, much less indicator of futurism, the entire novel strains patients. I finished it only so I can return from the future until you all don't waste your money on this pile of monkey poo. I love how I use some big vocab words in the review, like anachronisms and Centella, and then ends on pile of monkey poo.

Amazon user, HOJND, gives the book a one-star review as well, and a much less verbose title and critique. One word for the title, all caps, no. One more word for the review sucked. And I feel like that review is probably the most accurate. I thought about giving this book a little review. Loved it. Wouldn't change a thing.

Three out of five stars. Great web series called Good Mythical Morning, uploaded a video in 2015. We're host, Rhett and Link, very funny guys. Talk about the time travel claims of three of the supposed time travelers we just talked about. Victor Goddard, the Royal Air Force guy who claimed to fly four years into the future, but didn't write about it until 16 years later. Andrew J. Basiago, the politician who bounced all over the space time, continued when he

was a kid. You know, he was just a kid with Project Pegasus, you know, meet no bomb on Mars, witness in the Abraham Lincoln assassination at your speech. Lots of other fun stuff. Also, John Titeur, the guy who, you know, is from 2036 and then came to chat with people on a web forum in the late 90s

and also go back to the 70s to buy an old IBM computer. Let's see what people are saying in the comments thread beneath this video. Misty Marshall has nothing to say about time travel, but I guess she just felt like she had to post something under the video. So she wrote, the guy from 2036 is my age. That scares me that I might know him. And I'm sure that just made me laugh when I first read it.

Misty, three questions. One, why would you think you might know some random person just because they're the same age as you? Two, why would it scare you that you might know someone who claims to be a time traveler? And three, how do you get through your day? Seriously, how do you survive? How are you the person that has your shit together enough to access a computer and find this video and know how to type real words, but also be the person who posts something

that fucking stupid? Such a confusing comment. Oh, some random person who could be living anywhere in the world happens to be my age. I probably know them. Since I know most people my age, and only roughly, you know, 130 million fucking people were born the same year I was, YouTuber user, the eight ball really stores up the comments section with a thought bomb. Drop in the comment. There might be a time traveler who no one believes. Good job, eight ball. Way to contribute. And I want you to get back on the bench,

right? We got some people who really want to play the game. Yeah, there might be. There also might be a covenant of unicorns sitting in my garage right now. Halle Berry might be on a plane right now flying to court of lane to Professor Undine. Love for me. And trying to steal me from Lindsay. The world of might pretty big. There might even be a comment right now flying to Corde of Lane to Professor Undying Love for me. They're trying to steal me from Lindsay. The world of might pretty big. There might even be a comment thread out there somewhere where you don't post a name, point of observations. A user Megan Wheeler believes John Tider's story about being from 2036.

She posts. 2036 is the exact year that time travel was made. Me and my friend met a man who had a special phone, a.k.a. time travel device. Well, there you go. Fair enough, Megan, can't argue with that. You met a dude with a time travel device because he told you so, you know, hoping your friend aren't in that man's van right now or tied up in his basement. Something about this man that you met that I just don't care for. Sweetgum Studios has also been traveling through time and his or her dreams. He or she posts, I remember when I was in kindergarten.

That's a great way to start it. You know, it's gonna be credible when it starts with, I remember when I was in kindergarten. And it was a day before Valentine's Day, and I had a dream that my friend, Crystal, wouldn't be at school. And the next day she wasn't school. And I had several other dreams like that. It's okay if you don't believe me. I'm okay with that.

Hey, sweetcom, are you okay with me not even wondering if I believe you or not? Are you okay with the third option of me just not giving a shit about your stupid fucking dreams? This is a time travel comment section. Not a, I had a few weird dreams as a kid comment section. A family van der Ree doesn't want anyone thinking they're a time traveler, not for long anyway. First they post, I am from the future. I am watching in 2020. And then right before our minds are blown and mass panic and pandemonium breaks out, they write, no, I am just joking. Thank you, Vandery.

You have me questioning everything for a second. User Tannen puts an end to all the time travel speculation. Prove it is not possible. Tannen posts, if you time travel back or forth for only a few seconds in time, you'd end up in empty space, because our planet revolves around a star, and our star revolves around a black hole at the center of our galaxy, the Milky Way,

at around 250 kilometers per second, end of discussion. Shit, that sucks at Tannen, end of the discussion because I had some questions. You know, I feel like he doesn't know a lot about science. I feel like somebody said, may not be true and I feel like we should discuss it. User Shazam didn't get the message about the discussion being over either. He or she also seems frustrated by people speculated about time travel posting.

I'm surprised at the level of ignorance regarding time travel and quantum physics. It's called science and it's real. Google it. You fucking tell him, Shazam. Yeah, guys, science is real. Look it up or what's your Google science, guys? Google it. You pause a monkey poo.

Finally, Cyrus Cage. A totally believes in Basiago and his project Pegasus child traveling through time claims, writing, Basiago is a highly acclaimed lawyer, and I have researched his claims for years. His story never contradicts, no matter what he has asked. He is telling the truth.

Yep, truth. Who cares if that no one in the scientific community or academic community or in any other community not composed of entirely wacky doodles, believe Cyrus? Who cares that a story is fucking insanely for post-race? You know, why not believe that the CIA would have access to time travel machines and put kids and top secret time travel programs and, you know, not kill Bosiole or try him for treason when he starts to disclose highly sensitive classified information?

Who cares about any of that? He always tells the same story. So it is true. That is how you know. Say the same lie over and over and the Cyrus cages of the world will believe you. Scary. I guess that partly explains why so many people believe this shit. You know, it is an adventure that, it is an adventure. Say the same lie over and over and it's true. I got to pick one.

I got to pick a lie and it's just never back off of it. I can fly when I want to. My eyes are closed and that's my whole story. Just keep it short and simple. You know, I can fly with my eyes closed when I want to. People are like, no, you can't. I'm like, yeah, I can. I can do it. I want. I said, when I want to my eyes closed when I want to. People are like, no, you can't. I'm like, yeah, I can, I do it. I want, I said, when I want to, and I don't fucking want to.

I don't like the pressure you put on me right now. I did yesterday, when, like in some time, you know, some time, you weren't there, what do you know? Before we get into closing thoughts, let's take a few looks back and a few, or sorry, look at a few more bits. Of the evidence people have been kicking around for time travel, besides just random people's stories.

There was a, in 2008, a hoax about archeologists finding the tiny Swiss watch, you know, Chinese tomb that had been sealed for 400 years, dating back to the Ming Dynasty, got a bunch of traction, even though it never happened. Whole story was made up, what people still talk about on the web today is if it did happen, point towards it as evidence of time travel.

In 2013, a trans scientist supposedly registered the Ariyac time travel machine with the state-run Center for Strategic Conventions. The device was said to predict a future in a printout after taking reans from the touch of a user and predict five to eight years of the future life of any individual with 98% accuracy. As quickly as it was put out into the world,

the Iranian government silenced any more talk about it, which means it's for sure true. Not exactly a time machine, more of a witchcraft prophecy machine, but close enough to mention here. No one in the scientific community believes this thing is real for a second. There are lots of other little pieces of what some might feel as evidence of some sort of time travel. One of the most interesting is the chrono visor. This device was supposed to be able to take pictures of the past and was allegedly worked on by two of the most brilliant scientists of all time. Enrico Fermi, the Nobel Prize winner for physics in 1938, and Warner von Braun, one time Nazi SS member eventualist team NASA rocket scientist among others. The conspiratorial story of the chrono visor includes Nazi and Vatican links,

ends with the unholy device being dismantled and held in the secret vaults of the Vatican. No one ever figured out how it worked, although the redobiased claims of a picture of Jesus on the cross taken by this device. Many of the scientists associate with building it died before any information on this device was either leaked to the public, or you know, made up by someone. The most compelling evidence for time travel may come from the Simpsons, as in the cartoon. With more than 600 episodes, creator of the Simpsons Matt Groening and his production team have always seemed to have their finger on the cultural pulse of America. So much so that they've even managed to seemingly predict several major historical events and

freak out a bunch of weirdos on the internet. In 1993, the show predicted an attack by a white tiger on entertainer's sick Frieden Roy happened in 2003. The show also predicted auto correct fails on mobile devices in 1994, 13 years before auto correct was a thing. The show predicted FaceTime in 1995, 15 years before FaceTime was released.

Show also gets credit for predicting the existence of the Higgs Boson or the God particle, a breakthrough that helps explain how everything in the universe has mass. That wasn't confirmed until 2012. Homer Simpson knew about it 1998. The Simpson also predicted the NSA spine scandal of 2013. The Simpson predicted smartwatches almost 20 years before they were released. The show even made mention of the Ebola outbreak of 2014 in a 1997 episode.

The Simpsons also predicted more recent things like the FIFA corruption scandal of 2015. 2012, they predicted Greece would default on their national debt, which they did in 2015. Strange stuff like the 2012 depiction of the Lady Gaga Super Bowl halftime show, it looks very similar to the one that actually occurred in 2017. They predicted Disney's takeover of Fox in 1998, came true in 2017, on and on and on. So that's the best evidence that we can find for time travel being a thing.

It doesn't seem like any of it is super credible. There are many other claims out there. Pretty much all of them seem to be roughly 100% wackadoot. To close out this time sucks suck on time. Let's check in with a few great minds. Hear their time travel thoughts, starting with Nikola Tesla, suck subject 105. At one point, Nikola Tesla told a reporter that he was in contact with the residents from the electromagnetic charge or when he was in contact with the residents from the electromagnetic charge. He had found that he went out of his space and from the electro magnetic charge, he had found

that he went out of his space and time window. He said that he had been able to see the past, the present, and the future at the very same time. Tesla, as we learn though, dico a little crazy in his later years. He never followed up that same with any sort of time travel device or schematics for the construction of a device, or even any solid thoughts on how one would travel through time intentionally. Neil deGrasse Tyson famed astrophysicist, science educator, set of time travel, time is

relative. So time can be stretched for me relative to you. So time has multiple sort of parallel rates at which it flows depending on the state of who's making the measurement and the state of who's in motion and what condition they are in. He also said, suppose you could move around in your timeline with the same flexibility as moving left and right up and down forward and backward. If that's the case, then you can revisit your own timeline.

Under those conditions, you do not die. You are always dying. You are not born. You are always being born. That's another kind of interesting way to think about time. And a final quote from Tyson is, if it is being a prisoner of the present transitioning, uh, wait, if it is being a prisoner of the presence transitioning from the past

to the future, I have the illusion of free will. And I'm happy to live in that illusion in the knowledge that I don't. Uh, sadly, not one of his quotes has shit to do with inventing a cool car or a telephone booth that can bounce us into the future or past bummer Astro physicist Michio Kaku once said once confined to fantasy and science fiction time travel is now simply an engineering problem. Okay. All right. Finally One of these nerds has a decent quote

Saying that it's an engineering problem makes it sound possible to fix right to solve. I like you Michio Kaku. You're my favorite nerd right now To close out this little section on what modern science thinks about the possibility of time travel Here's a statement from Brian Green an American theoretical physicist and professor at Columbia University We know a lot about time, but that doesn't mean time as we experience it is real It doesn't mean that time as we experience it is how the world is actually structured I mean there are many ideas that people put forward, the possibility, for instance, that you know, we all know that matter is made of molecules and atoms.

Could it be that time is also made of some kind of ingredient, a molecule of time, an atom of time? Is that really what time is at its fundamental level? Time travel is absolutely possible, and this is not some sort of weird sci-fi thing that I'm talking about here. Albert Einstein taught us more than 100 years ago that time travel is possible if you're focusing upon time travel to the future. Now of course, what people really want to know about is getting back. Can you travel back to the past? I don't think so. We don't know for sure. No one has given definitive proof that you can't travel to the past. In fact, some very reputable scientists have suggested ways that you might travel to the past, but

every time we look at the proposals and detail, it seems kind of clear that they're right at the edge of the known laws of physics. And most of us feel that when physics progresses to a point that we understand things even better, these proposals will just be ruled out. They won't work. But I guess I would say there's a long shot possibility bit based on what we know today, the time travel to the past might be possible, but most of us wouldn't bet our life on it. So there you have it, going back not likely, but not impossible, going forward possible, but we don't know how we'd pull it off. So in the end, kind of a bummer, right? Dammit. Doesn't look like we're close

at all to figuring out how to fucking travel through time. But don't get sad because if anyone ever figures that out at any point in the future, then those are the chances they can come back right now and then we can kill them and take the time machine and then they would show us how that works. But like I said earlier, if that were to ever happen and probably would already happen, so maybe you should be sad. It's like Stephen Hawking said in his book, A Brief History of Time. If time travel is possible, where are the tourists from the future? So what do I think after all this, I don't think we're ever going to be able to travel through time, at least not backwards. Based on what I learned about the limitations of current technology, I doubt we'll ever be able to

travel into the future in a real kind of fun, exciting sci-fi way. And even in a terrible kind of way that's very painstaking, only gets you a little bit further ahead, probably not that for, I don't know, 100,000 years. But you know what, I don't give a shit. I don't care, I love being alive right now. The world is exciting. It's mysterious enough for me right now. I don't wanna head back to the past compared to the now,

the past almost always sucks. Overall, sure, I realized personal tragedy can chain that for various individuals. Overall, now is the best. And now keeps moving forward. So I'm not going to worry about time traveling forward because we're already kind of doing that one day at a time. A pace that honestly seems too fast for me sometimes already. If I want a time travel, I'll just read some cool sci-fi book or watch a sweet movie about time travel. That's enough for me. I hope that's enough for me. I hope that's enough for you.

That's, that seems like that's about all we're going to get. Time now for today's Top 5 takeaways. Time, suck, top 5 takeaways. Number one, time travel is actually technically possible. As far as what scientists know about the physics of the universe in space time, like my nerd buddy, Michio Kaku said, time travel is now simply an engineering problem, but a very, very difficult one. Number two, Stephen Hawking through a time travel party and no one showed up. How awesome is that? What a hilarious way to try and prove the time travel won't be possible any time soon or maybe ever. It appears that people from the future never invented a time machine or stopped

giving a shit about Stephen Hawking and never got his invitation. Number three, so many movies, TV shows, have been built around time travel. The number one, five, eight, and 12 highest-grossing movies of all time. Have time travel is a theme. Yes, the Avengers movies. Several other movies in the top 100, highest-grossing films, involved time travel, several other films that raked in over half a billion dollars apiece made time travel a part of their films, including the timeless cinematic experience

that is the transformer franchise. Number four, we are already time travelers. The mere existence of our lives is moving slowly in the future one second at a time, and anytime one might want to look into the past, a simple glance at an old movie or a photograph will do as we'll gazing upon the stars. We're seeing light sent to us from over 600 years ago. How cool is that?

Think about that the next time you stargaze. You're being lit from light from the past while looking at that light in the present, while every second you age your way into the future. Instead of working on moving faster and faster and you know going into the future or moving back into the past we should all maybe just focus a bit more and enjoying the present as much as we can whenever we can because it never lasts and someday we might just miss it. Number five new info more movies. Let's look at five of my favorite, you know, all-time time travel flicks. Well, a little countdown. At number five, gotta get some love to the Bill and Ted

movies, both excellent adventure and bogus journey. Some of the best cinema of the late 80s and early 90s. George Carlin is Rufus, my favorite comedic mind of all time. Number four, it's army of fucking darkness. Bruce Campbell it is best. Creepy, dark, campy. Did I change software arm, necronomicon, also featured in the film. We got a, we got one of the two of those floating around the sucked. Dungeon right now. This is my boom stick. Such a good movie. Number three, the weird ass movie Donnie Darko.

Hard to explain the plot. It was a time vortex for sure and a fucked up, you know, looking giant rabbit. It's fun for the whole family. And it's probably going to get the the whole family nightmares no one will understand. Number two, you know, time travel scene movie of all time as far as the ones I enjoy is gotta be time cop. I mean, you already heard about all those awards at one. John Claude Van Dam, overcoming terrible dialogue and strange 1994 editing to deliver cinema's

all time best karate splits and boxer briefs. Number one time travel movie officially for the time's sake universe is Mike judges 2004 film in theocracy. It's cliche at this point to call that movie a documentary, but you read the news. You know, it's not far off. New wants and context almost dead. In theocracy is a story of two people from the 21st century cryogenically frozen to wake up 500 years in the future where they are now the smartest people in a world populated almost

entirely by it is of the internet. If you haven't seen it, treat yourself and check it out. And then do everything you can not to let our future become the future depicted in that movie. Not anymore than it already is. Time, suck, tough, five, take away. Time travel, we did it, we suck time, and I feel like my mouth got a workout. Holy shit. Between historical references and all of the big science words, men, my mouth, like,

legitimately, it feels like sore. Like when you smile too much, just not used to trying to move my mouth, like legitimately, it feels like sore. Like when you smile too much, just not used to trying to move my mouth in those many different directions constantly. Didn't find the answers I was hoping for, but it did feel good to come to a much better understanding of where we're actually at in regards to time travel possibilities.

I would always rather know, you know, and feel good about kind of, you know, having more knowledge about something than just to kind of, I guess, you know, live in some fantasy world that deep down I probably think that might not be true at all or isn't true. It just sounded like a jackass. Anyway, thank you to the time stock team. Thanks to Queen of the Suck, Lindsey Cummins, high priest of the Suck Harmony Vella Camp,

Reverend Dr. Joe H.J. Paisley, thanks to the Bidelixer app design crew, thanks to Access to Parallel, big thanks to the Scripp Keeper Zach Flannery for helping immensely with this very difficult time travel suck, not an easy one to put together. If you want to meet more time suckers, I keep seeing more and more out in the wild, which feels awesome. Join the cult of the Curious Private Facebook group over 13,000 meat sacks in there. Huge thanks long overdue to some of the cold to the curious Facebook page moderators Liz Hernandez, Megan Howell, Robbie Erickson,

and for even more social interaction, head over to the time suck discord group. You can link to it from the time suck app roughly 4,000 time suck discord members there right now. Link in both, uh, for both in the episode description, go and cult again next week. Always some of my favorite sucks, right? Cult, cult, cult. Talking about the source family cult. It's been bouncing around on the top five most voted for time suck topics over in the time suck apps topic board for a while now.

And I'm too intrigued to wait for it to win a voting cycle. I want to learn more about father, yo, now. Source family turned the early 1970s Hollywood sex drugs and rock and roll counterculture scene into an actual religion and Father Yoda was God. A collective of roughly 150 of father-yodes religious followers lived communal style and a house in the Hollywood Hills. He had 13 spiritual wives that he had a lot more than spiritual relationships with. As Cold Sprang forced, one of the United States' first vegetarian restaurants in 1969 had opened on L.A. Sunset Strip, operated by the charismatic father, Yod, the source restaurant offered

organic vegetarian food served by a collective of young hippies dressed in white robes. John Lennon, Yoko Ono were regulars as was Marlon Brando and Warren Beatty. The restaurant even featured in Woody Allen's classic movie Annie Hall, where Woody's character mockingly orders a Falfa sprouts and Mashed East. At his peak, it reportedly took in $300,000 a month. And then the cult formed a band, Yahuwa 13, selling psychedelic albums out of the source restaurant before selling the restaurant, moving to Hawaii to live together on a huge compound.

And well, if you want to know more, and I think you're going to listen next week, time now to hear from our growing community of listeners and today's Time Sucker Updates. Get your time, sucker updates. Kicking things off with a nice little shout out for a fellow Idahoan. Time, sucker and space is her Tristan Pearson rights. Hello, master sucker, hope you're doing well. Been a long time fan of yours stand up

and recently a huge fan of the podcast. I listen to time, sucker, almost every chance I get. I heard about it about one and a half years ago now, and I wish I would have listened sooner. I've been hooked since I listened to the confession killer suck. The person who got me into the suck was my best friend CJ. He's been a dedicated fan since the early days of the podcast and is one of the first 300 space lizards. I'm riding into today to ask for a favor. CJ's birthday is coming up next month on November 16th

until be 22. I know he would be happy in a proud space if he gave him a shout out on the show. CJ's a hardworking young man. He doesn't ask for much just enough hours to pay his bills and time off to play games and enjoy his friends. He's very giving and willing to help out people whenever he can. I know he would love it if you gave him a shout out on the podcast and or a happy birthday wish. Thanks for being an amazing entertainer and a well research and having a well research podcast. Keep on sucking since early Tristan Pearson, PS, you should come down and do a show and boy see CJ and I would love to see you live. Hail Nimrod, praise both jangles.

Well, happy birthday CJ. You had some son of a bitch. Keep working hard dude, keep being a good dude. Then things tend to work out. I feel like for for hard working good dudes a lot more than they do for lazy pieces of shit dudes. I hope I get a boy they do for lazy pieces of shit dudes. I hope I get a boycy show lined up one of these days, been way, way too long since I performed a boycy.

And yeah, thanks for sending that in. Time sucker Jen C cracked me up with a hilarious little DaVinci suck update. Jen wrote, Art History Degree and you still got me. I hate you. I recently caught up on the Leonardo da Vinci suck and was heartbroken when I heard that poor young Leonardo was repeatedly subjected to sodomy by his mentors, teachers and fellow students. I couldn't help but marvel at how that brave young boy continued to blossom and develop his genius talents despite this abuse. I was in the midst of a major

paradigm shift, completely reimagining and reframing his various masterpiece. When you broke the news, but I had just been got, God, you are such a piece of shit. Just one more thing for me to add to my list under useless art degree. Keep on sucking, Gen C. Oh, thank you, Gen. I know I upset you, but you made me feel so happy. I love how I made Stonefield one, like, really? All those guys, they're fucked by their teachers, all of them. I hope you're doing something in the art world currently or at least still enjoying art history.

It is very entertaining. And thank you for sending that in. The Josephine Baker suck. I was hoping it would inspire some of you and it did so glad, hail Nimrod. Space Lister Melissa Newton writes in with her tale, Hey master sucker, just listen to your Josephine Baker episode. And I just wanted to say it put me in the best mood.

Her story is truly inspiring. I had no idea who she was or her amazing accomplishments in history until now. I'm constantly trying to be the best woman and person I can be continually trying to inspire others. I'm a captain of two roller derby teams here in Kansas City, often feel overwhelmed by the responsibilities of it all. That last time's like just reminding me that I need to keep my head held high and keep on marching on. Anyways, thank you

for spreading her story to us all. Also, your podcast keeps me entertained while it worked. I repair rigid surgical scopes. And the podcast keeps me my scattered brain entertained so I can focus better. Last week I was horribly full of anxiety due to a championship game I had coming up on Saturday. I ran out of all the regular time so I became a space wizard so I could get some of that sweet secret suck. You truly kept me out of my head all week. I greatly appreciate that as my team. The shotgun Sheila's did get the trophy two years undefeated, which previously had never been done before my league's history. So thank you, Dan, for all you do. Hey, Luciferina, Hill, Nimrod Love, Melissa, Beetlejuke.

That's fucking great name. Congrats, Beetlejuke. Love, roller derby, not gonna lie. I find women's roller derby very sexy. Hey, Luciferina, all those tattoos and the action, the toughness, the fearlessness. Very cool. Hope you went a third championship next year, right? Be the first to three Pete.

One more Josephine, Josephine Baker, inspiration update. We got so many. But actually, this one is, I don't know that this is an Espera, this is an update, not necessarily an inspiration, but an update. Super sucker, Leland Wait writes, greeting Suck Master General, my name is Leland.

I'm a melanin enhanced meat sack. And I wanted to congratulate you on another awesome episode this week. I had never heard Josephine Baker's story and never knew just how incredibly inspirational she was. I live in the St. Louis metro east and share a border and zip code with East St. Louis or East St. Louis. You went a little into detail about how about just how rough a city East St. Louis is. And it is certainly has a reputation that has been earned,

but did you know that in 1960, East St. Louis was named an all-American city, which has been equated to winning a Nobel Peace Prize for Constructive Citizenship. There was a docu series on YouTube called All-American City, East St. Louis, that goes into detail about the race ride and how large companies came into the area,

pulled every natural resource out that they could get and when there was nothing left, they packed it all up and took jobs with them. Endless poverty and corruption has plagued the city ever since. Anyways, hope this finds you well. Well, hail, Nimrod, hail, Lucifina, give that good boy, Bojangles a belly rub from me soon to be spaces at Leland. Well, thank you for that update, Leland. Did not know all that. Did not know about the all-American city. Hope some new companies move into the area. Turn East St. Louis economy, you know, turn this economy around, spread some hope, you know, into an

atmosphere of hopelessness and, you know, create some change. And finally a strange and unsettling John Bonet Ramsey update. This one spoke me from Colorado Sucker, Aryan Wheeler. Aryan writes, Dearest Suck Master General of Lucifina's Dark and Mysterious Den of debauchery. My God, Bravo, when you're recent time suck on the very sad case of John Bonet Ramsey, what a heart wrenching story, and your approach was entirely comprehensive and considerate, so great job. Obviously, and it's extremely, it's an extremely sensitive topic. One that needs

to be approached with great care at its core, a little girl was murdered. It's so easy to get lost and caught up in the murder mystery that that horrible tragedy itself can get obscured. I know it's been a few weeks now since that suck, but I've wanted to share a quick and slightly goose bump inspiring story related to the case. I'll try to be brief, but do feel the need to set a bit of context. I grew up in Boulder in a house just about 10 blocks away from John Bonnet Ramsey, her house in the neighborhood of, oh boy, Shatakwa. By the way, I couldn't help but howl that your brief interlude discussing the name of Shatakwa

during the suck. As you repeatedly pronounce the name of the neighborhood pronouncing pronouncing it Shatakwa, I'm most informed me that it is actually pronounced with a softer Shatakwa or yeah or Shatakwa. You aren't alone. All of us kids had a hell of a time learning how to spell that word is children and a harder time learning how to pronounce it correctly. At any rate, the story is the God's honest truth and I will try and recount it exactly as it unfolded. I've been a window cleaner for much longer

than I care to admit. I started my first company here in Boulder in the 90s that moved to San Francisco where I ran another company for nearly 15 years. Then after having our baby boy, we decided to move back to Boulder. We arrived in the fall of 2014, and somewhat predictably,

I started my new company here in town. The very first call that I received for the new business was from a Mexican house cleaning crew who needed somebody to complete the tricky, high-roof access and ladder work on a house in the Shadokwood neighborhood. It was worked that the Mexican crew didn't feel comfortable doing themselves and wanted to shop out to myself. The house was being put on the market and the realtors were getting everything spruced up for the hopeful sale. As I pulled up and walked up the path to the house, I was thinking, wait a second, I recognize this place.

Holy shit. This is the John Bene Ramsey house. I rang the doorbell and met the Mexican crew chief named Jorin who walked me around the property and introduced me to the rest of the crew of about eight cleaners. I might add that none of them spoke a lick of English except a crew chief who spoke fairly broken but understandable English. It was extremely clear that all of them, you know, were new to the country. We agreed on the price and I said to Jorin, so this is a pretty crazy house to be working on, isn't it? He responded, yes, it's very big, it's very big, many days of work. And I said, no, like it's a crazy

place to be working, isn't it? And he again said, yes, lots of rooms, lots of work. It was clear he had no idea about the Jambane story. Being the professional that I am, I decided it was best not to bring it up and just get to work. I figured there was no need to go into details about such sad history. I went ahead and started on the work and finished in five, six hours. One quick side note is about the house itself. The house was unlike any house I'd ever worked in.

Literally felt like I was working in a maze. I've easily been in over 10,000 houses in my career and none were designed in a more disjointed fashion. Each room except the master bedroom was tiny, like really tiny and there were rooms everywhere. The kitchen was literally 15 feet by 10 feet. And to get to it, you had to go through several other rooms. Everywhere you looked, there was a small stairway

and they took you to rooms on different floors for no particular reason. I personally gave it a fung fun sway rating of one out of ten it made for uh... gave me undeniable anxiety just being inside so i finished the job went home didn't really think anymore about it other than to tell my wife about what a crazy fucked up place at houses the next day around four p.m. I received a text from jordan he says

can you please call me immediately you know something happened in the house uh...? Do you know something happened in the house? About, or do you know something happened in this house? About 10 seconds later, I receive a second text that says, please call me immediately because we see a little girl in the basement. So as you are probably feeling a wave of goosebumps, right, yeah, goosebumps right now,

I also got head to toe shivers and goosebumps and jumped to call him back. He answered immediately and said, we are all standing in the street in front of the house. We aren't going back in. I was like, what happened? He said, it started last night. We were here working until about 1 a.m.

and one of the maids was working in the master bedroom. She was vacuuming and kept seeing what she described as little hands pulling the curtain back from the window. YEEEAH! When she returned to look, the hands would disappear and the curtains would fall back in place. She said it happened several times but figured she was just tired. Then when they returned the next day, they were all taking a break in the kitchen around the center island having sodas. He said that there was a tall stack of real estate fliers in the center island about an inch high. All of a sudden, they said it was as though somebody swiped

at the fliers and they all flew in the air at once. It was so violent that one of the maids yelled out loud. There was no wind, no nothing. It simply happened out of the blue. And then that afternoon, the maids were working in the basement, finishing up their chores. When they were done, they walked up the staircase. As they turned around to turn off the lights, they saw a little blonde girl standing at the bottom of the staircase looking at them. At that point, Jordan said they all completely freaked out, ran outside in a complete panic. He said the ladies were completely inconsolable and pale as a sheet. That's when he called me.

He said, we are all in the street. None of the maids want to go back inside. He asked me to come back to the house. I said, I'm sorry, John, Jordan, but no fucking way. I still have no idea why he thought to call me of all people, but perhaps it was because I had asked him about the house the day before. I did go ahead and tell him about the murder in the house. That was a small blonde girl that had been killed. I also said,

John, listen to me. You need to pull your shit together and go back in there. You need to tell her that if she sees a light anywhere around her to go to it, I'm not remotely religious and have no idea why I said this, but it's the only thing I could think of at the moment. He said, no, they weren't going back in the house. And that to it. I'm not remotely religious and have no idea why I said this, but it's the only thing I could think of at the moment. He said, no, they weren't going back in the house and that was it. Hung up the phone. That's the last I've spoken to him. I know this sounds unbelievable, but I have to tell you I didn't get the slightest inclination that he was lying to me. This was a completely panic phone call, and I can hear the honest emotion in his voice. I have no doubt they saw what he said they saw. So, saw it from my lengthy story,

but I hope the time suckers liked it. It is the closest thing that I have to a ghost story, and I figured if I was ever gonna tell somebody this community was the place to do it. Can't tell how, I can't tell you how much I love your podcast. Keep on sucking. Hail Lucifer, in a much love, Arian Wheeler. Holy shit, man, that did game in the chills.

My God, that was a hell of a tale. I'm glad you shared it. Thanks for writing in. Thanks for writing out so well too. I hope that little girl does find that light, does find some peace. Hope she's rested in peace, man. And thank you for enjoying time, Stuck. I hope that continues. Much love to you as well and to everyone who listens and sends in their messages. Thanks, time suckers. I need a net. We all did.

Have a great day. Thank you for your Thanks, time suckers. I need a net. We all did. Have a great week, mead sacks. If you do figure out how to travel through time, please don't kill any of my ancestors and erase me. If you go back, I'd be so flippin' mad at you if you erased my family tree. If you go forward, find a new mouth for me.

If you can just find me like a new, cool robot mouth. It pronounces everything perfectly. I wouldn't be opposed to that. I wouldn't feel terrible about that. No matter where you end up in time, promise me that you'll just keep on sucking. I love these big brain nerd guys. I also kind of want to fucking punch up in some lockers right now.

Love these big brain nerd guys. Also kind of want to fucking punch him in some lockers right now.