Timesuck with Dan Cummins - 69 - Freemasons 2 of 2: Are Freemasons the Illuminati?

Episode Date: January 8, 2018

Do the Freemasons work hand in hand with the illuminati? Are the Freemasons and the Illuminati one and the same? Is Alex Jones a Freemason? Was Jack the Ripper a Freemason? Did George Washington, definitely a Freemason, build the Washington D.C. monument as a tribute to the Dark Lord Lucifer? Is Alex Jones actually Bill Hicks? Do Jewish Zionists control the Freemason illuminati? Who are the Trilateralists? What is the Bilderberg group? What the fuck do they have to do with the illuminati? Why do I keep saying illuminati instead of Freemason? Am I the illuminati? SO MANY QUESTIONS on today’s whackadoodle episode of Timesuck. Trouble with the APP or new website? Email BitElixir! (you'll have to copy and paste - sorry) [e-mail] Merch - https://badmagicmerch.com/ Want to try out Discord!?! https://discord.gg/tqzH89v Want to join the Cult of the Curious private Facebook Group? Go directly to Facebook and search for "Cult of the Curious" in order to locate whatever current page hasn't been put in FB Jail :) For all merch related questions: https://badmagicmerch.com/pages/contact Please rate and subscribe on iTunes and elsewhere and follow the suck on social media!! @timesuckpodcast on IG, @timesuckpodcast on Twitter, and www.facebook.com/timesuckpodcast

All right time for some free mason's part two time suckers if you've not listened to part one push pause on this bad boy Listen to Friday's episode first I'll give you much better understanding of today's episode you've been warned Do the free mason's work hand in hand with the Illuminati are the free mason's and the Illuminati one and the same is Alex Jones a free mason Was Jack the Ripper a free mason did George Washington? Definitely a free mason Build a George Washington definitely a Freemason build a Washington DC monument to the Dark Lord Lucifer?

Is Alex Jones actually Bill Hicks? Do Jewish Zionists control the Freemason Illuminati? Who are the trilaterlists? What is the Bilderberg group? What the fuck do they have to do with the Illuminati? Why do I keep seeing Illuminati instead of Freemason? Am I the Illuminati? So many questions on today's wackadoodle episode of Time Suck. You're listening to Time Suck. Hello Time Suckers and Happy Monday.

I'm Dan Cummins, aka the master sucker, aka Captain Suck, aka Reverend Dr. Sucker. And you just stuck your brain to the living beating heart of the cold to the curious. Recording from the Suck dungeon, Suck Studio, Suck Layer, Padawan Sucker, Josh Crel, working the levels. Happy 21st birthday to Josh, big birthday, and he's still getting the job done. This episode, if it does show up a little late,

just unexpected technical difficulties. You know, we're just still getting the studio figured out. I think somebody moved in above, and I don't know what's going on up there. I don't know if they're having an old school CB radio party, but we had some weird frequency interference and just delayed things a bit and made us use different recording equipment. And if you hear a little jingle jangle, because Penny Poopers is hanging around the studio. See, I was away for the weekend. I didn't want to leave her home. I felt guilty. Okay, so quick tour dates, and then on to the free mason's. Big thank you to all the Indianapolis suckers

who came out this past week and Saturday especially, man, when the first show was sold out, second show was almost sold out of mortise. I feel like just like the whole crowd was time suckers and it made the show the best. A lot of time suckers came out Friday as well. So keep coming out suckers, let's keep the party going. It's been so much fun, it makes the show's the best of I've ever done. Next shows in Providence, Rhode

Island, January 19th, 20th. No show in Chickpea, Massachusetts on January 21st. I am sorry. The venue went out of business. And whoever was going out of business, I guess was so caught up in their own shit. They didn't care about warning anybody. So, you know, bummer, sorry about that. I will go back to Massachusetts, working on setting up a 2018 Boston show at a healthier venue. Philadelphia, January 25th through 27 Baltimore, January 28th at McGubby's Sticker Tron sale for that now.

Chicago, January 31st through February 3rd, Zaini's one of my favorite clubs in the country. New York City got them comedy club where I recorded my first comedy central set many, many years ago. One night, only February 11th, those tickets are going now, get in on that Detroit, February 16th at the Magic Bag and Ferndale, the boys from Small Town Murder. Tickets are almost sold out for the 7pm standup show.

Tickets are on sale for the 10pm swap cast live podcast with Small Town Murder. Small Town Time Suck, Time Suck Town murder. I don't know. I don't know what's gonna be called. It's gonna be a blast though and there are still some tickets available for the standup show. So be sure and just get those more tour dates at either dandcomans.tv time suck podcast.com miniapolis tickets are on sale standup shows March 2nd, 3rd very limited tickets live time suck podcast Saturday March 3rd at 2pm very very limited seating for that. Another live podcast just added in Spokane Washington one show only Sunday night May 6th more announcements at the end of the show including additional tour dates now time for some free masonry.

So who are the free mason's really? Are they just a fraternal order? Just a boys club, the grown up equivalent of blood brothers having secret handshakes, using code words to get into the tree fort clubhouse? What's up with the third Illuminati eye? Why is the Illuminati symbol also associated with Freemasons? Well, here's what they say at the website for the George Washington Masonic National Memorial. It says, one of the most extensive sources of our symbolism is the great light and masonry.

There, we find several references to the all-seen eye of the supreme being, especially in the books classified as wisdom literature. Some of the earliest are from the book of Psalms. The majority of the songs in this book were written between 800 and 600 BC and were used in the ceremonies held at the Temple of Solomon. The symbol recurs numerous times in these beautiful ancient hymns, such as the Lord is in

his holy temple, the Lord's throne is in heaven, his eyes behold, his eyelids try the children of men, or behold the eye of the Lord is upon them that fear him, upon them that hope in his mercy, or the eyes of the Lord are upon the righteous, and his ears are open unto their cry. Now here are the divine gaze. It's celebrated as profoundly concerned with justice, according to psalmist, Supreme Being, observes his creation

from the supernatural throne in the celestial temple, gazing with approval on those who are aware of his presence and who follow the moral law. Similar uses of the symbol of the eye of God maybe found in the book of Proverbs, which introduces the idea that the eyes of the Lord preserve knowledge. Now there's another book, it's the wisdom of Ben Sir also known as ecclesiasticus, maybe one of the most important sacred sources for the symbolism for which we are so familiar. This is a book that is part of the biblical canon for some branches of Christianity, such as Catholicism,

not for others, such as Anglican. It was written in the second century BC and it reiterates the theme of omniscience, you know, and his eyes are upon them that fear him and he knoweth every work of man. Later Ben Sirius uses languages that more directly evoke the common iconographic depictions of the all-seeing eye. The eyes of the Lord are 10,000 times brighter than the sun. Be holding all the ways of men considering the most secret parts. This image of the divine gaze is a more luminous than 10,000 suns as a source in biblical literature for Western iconography's depiction of the eye of God with brilliant glory. The theme of the divine gaze is found in the New Testament as well. The letter to Hebrews says, neither is there any creature that is not manifest in his sight, but all things are naked and opened unto the eyes of him with whom we have to do.

Isn't that weird? The third eye, which now is especially combined with the pyramid, is so associated with the Illuminati, which is very closely associated with the devil, actually has biblical origins and was assembled associated by many with God's power. Who knew? I picked the third eye to be part of the time sucks iconography because it's association with conspiracies, felt right for a show that digs into a lot of conspiracies, and because I associated with enlightenment, which is what I want this show to be about. And because I'm a card carrying member of the Illuminati. I joined it. I joined in 97. Doos were cheaper. Now you gotta go, you gotta sacrifice, I think, two people instead of one, which is what I was able to pull off, you know, back then. And it didn't have to be a baby when I joined.

I just, I pushed a homeless guy in front of a train. And that's how they, that's a couple guys and cloaks watch me. They marked it on the card. And now I get to be part of the one-world government. No, I, I didn't know it also had historical association with gods on Nippetans so I think it's just funny considering what what people now seem to associate the Flood and I with, right? Just my how things change, right? That's kind of what today's episode is all about. Meanings and associations changing over time. And then because most of us are so unfamiliar with history, we accept the modern interpretation which in many cases is based on absolute horse shit. On nothing but just malarkey and bull dust. Remember that old replacement swear from last week? Many

of the conspiracies regarding who the Freemasons really are have twisted and turned greatly over the years and many of them have folded into other conspiracies. And then most conspiracies about secret societies I have learned actually eventually fold into Freemasonry. So okay, so let's dig into some of these Juicy old conspiracies time suckers, some good old Dan Brown type shit

or so many conspiracies about the Freemasons. Let's look into some of the bigger, some of the wackier ones to what we can learn about, you know, when they originated, why they originated, where, first up the Illuminati, let's talk about who they actually are and where this conspiracy comes from. To lay this out, I actually need to bounce around a bit

historically. To understand the modern paranoia, surrounding the Illuminati, we need to understand Zionism. And not sure if you recall the term Zionist. I know I've tossed it out once or twice in previous episodes. I believe I mentioned it in the idiots of the internet segment of the Einstein episode,

time sucks 67. A true Zionist is a supporter of Zionism, a person who believes in the development and protection of a Jewish nation in what is now Israel. The term was coined in 1890 by Nathan Bernbaum. And Zionism is a national liberation movement of the Jewish people, which holds it all Jews.

Like the people of any other nation are entitled to a homeland. Now, I'm not sure why that's hard to understand or what's hard to understand about that desire. You know, all people, all tribes, they want to home. I do understand the Palestinian side of not wanting to give up a portion where you were living to someone

who used to live there though as well. Imagine if like a hundred years from now China has become far and away the most important military and economic leader of the world. You know they got military bases all around the globe now they're calling shots and then for whatever reason they become very good friends with the Cherokee people. Right and they decide that you know it's only fair that the Cherokee be given their homeland back. And suddenly several states are in the long part of the United States and are now part of Cherokee Nation. I would understand the sense of fairness in the Cherokee, you know, getting gaining back ownership of some of their homeland, but I would also understand non-chairokee citizens who had nothing to do with the original outsting of the Cherokee people, you know, over,

you know, a couple centuries ago who now just have lost their country. But I digress. Should probably say any Israeli, Palestinian, Convo for a suck specifically on that conflict, I guess. So Nathan Bernbaum, a originator of the term Zionist. He was a writer and journalist who promoted Jewish autonomy in an international organization of the Jewish people and culture. And he was doing that in the Austrian Empire of the late 19th, early 20th century, when Antisemitism was rife and rampant. The seeds are being sown for the eventual formation of the Nazi party. So again, his interest in Jewish autonomy makes sense. He's a man tired of the country and culture he lives in,

continually shitting on his people. You know, he's tired of centuries of anti-Semitic ignorant prejudice. He doesn't at least outwardly want to bring Christianity to its knees. He does want Christianity to leave Judaism to fuck alone. And he's not the only one. You know, so some meetings are organized. Pro Zionist meetings. Meetings held in Yiddish. Uh-oh.

People start speaking in Yiddish. Arian start getting nervous. Arian feathers start getting ruffled. What are they meeting about? Why, why, guys? Hey, why are you guys speaking, why are you guys speaking in your G language? Why do you want your own land? Oh, man

What if they want all our land worth are talking about eating our babies? Why must they eat our Christian babies? Well, I must they sacrifice our Christian babies to their craft killing jivel just devil Jew god I don't know why that old-timey German guy was suddenly a In northwestern redneck But that's the accident away with an Austria is not the only the only place where the Jewish people are not liked at this time. They're also not liked in nearby Eastern Russia. There was actually so much anti-Semitism and violence towards Russian Jews in actual

term was born, a pogrom, which is defined as an organized massacre of a particular ethnic group in particular that of Jews in Russia or Eastern Europe. The origins that were going back to around 1880. So anti-Semitic propaganda is being pushed out in Russia like crazy. So much, it's real hot. It's real popular, it's being pushed out in various places all over Europe in late 19th century. In the rise of the third Reich episode, time suck bonus episode number three, we learned

a little bit about that. Well, an especially evil piece of anti-Semitic propaganda is created by the Russian secret police at the very tail end of the 19th century, the exact date lost to history. In 1903, portions of the protocols of the Elders of Zion were serialized in a Russian newspaper. It's Zyanma, or Zanmiya. It's Zanamiya, something like that. The banner is what it's called. The protocols of the elders of Zain

is one of the worst most destructive pieces of propaganda of all time. And in 24 chapters or protocols, allegedly minutes from meetings of Jewish leaders, the protocols describe the secret plans of Jews to rule the world by manipulating the economy, controlling the media and fostering religious conflict. Following the Russian Revolution 1917, anti-Bolshevik emigrates brought the protocols to the West,

they're heading out of their homeland, they're bringing it around to a place, soon after the edition circulated across Europe, the United States, South America, Japan, and Arabic translation, fierce appear to the 1920s, the propaganda flourished internationally because anti-Semitism was rampant internationally. I would argue that no one culture, like no one specific culture had been more consistently hated and feared than the Jewish people, right? Historically, people fear what they don't understand, and I feel like a lot of people just do not understand and have not understood Jewish culture and religion.

Begin in a 1920 auto magnet, Henry Ford's newspaper, the Dearborn Independent, published a series of articles based in part on the protocols. The International Jew, the book that included this series was translated into at least 16 languages, both Adolf Hitler and Joseph Goebbels, later the Nazi minister of propaganda, praised Ford and the International Jew. Damn it, dammit, Henry Ford! So anti-Semitic, yet so good at building automobiles. Making me feel bad about my F-151 second. And I don't like that because I love my truck. Son of a bitch. 1921, the London Times presented conclusive proof that the protocols was clumsy

plagiarism, almost no one cared. And now just pro pro bonja, lumina de jue trying to convince us that the tricks are not tricks. That's natural lumennate. I'm not falling for your devil tricks. Ooh, Satan, you master of lies. I was like a, that was like I started off redneck and then got into like a weird old timey voice. The Times confirmed that the protocols had been copied in a large part from a French political satire

that never mentioned Jewish people. Maurice Jules, dialogue and help between Machiavelli and Montesquieu. I was 1864. Other investigations revealed that one chapter of a Prussian novel, Hermann Goudshaas, Beatrice, 1868, also inspired the protocols, and they also pulled from another source we're going to talk about here very soon. So what are these books claim the Zionists were saying in their secret Yiddish power meetings?

Well, here's a little excerpt from the protocols. We shall indicate the necessary of reforms as a consequence of the disorderly muddled, which the financial disorders of the Goyum fallen. The first lack of order, which we shall show lies in the fact that we begin with designating the simple budget, which grows from year to year for the following reasons. This budget is stretched until the middle of the year, then they demand a corrective budget, which is spent in three months, after which they ask a supplementary budget, and all this ends with a liquidation budget. And as the budget of the year following is framed according to the sum of the general total, the yearly departure from the norm amounts to 50% a year so that the yearly budget is tripled within 10 years.

Thanks to such methods, which are permitted by the carelessness of the Goiom states, their treasuries have been emptied. Right? Well, I checked out some academic websites, such as UC Berkeley Archives that show excerpts from the protocols and Maurice Jolie's dialogue and hell clearly plagiarized. It just took this satire and then they just added,

you know, Jewish people to be the characters. Like really, really obviously stolen. And here lies the beginning of the modern myth of Jews control all the money. This is actually where it comes from. This old propaganda, right? I'm sure you've heard that. Some racist friend or something at some point or some joke.

You know, the Jews control the world, there's banks and the money. And people like, well, yo, they do. People never look into it and see who actually, and sure, I'm sure there's some Jewish people who are CEOs. That's a whole other thing why the Jewish culture was actually ended up in banking is because,

well, because it was considered like user relaunch or whatever, and Christianity made it like dirty from financial transactions, so that Jewish people got that job by default, and blah, blah, blah. Again, we talked about that in the third Reich one, but also it was just this crazy propaganda that put that in everybody's head.

So there's, and there's more of this kind of talk, the Jewish leaders have a thorough plan to destabilize the global economy and use their Jewish wealth to essentially buy the world's governments and control them in secret. So now in the public's mind, the Zionists are trying to take over the world and also woven into Zionist mythology as the Illuminati.

And woven into the Illuminati is free masonry. So let's go back another hundred years or so and talk about the Illuminati origins and how this all connects. All right, so you got free masonry and Prussia, Bavaria, Austria, and the late 18th century. And it's very disorganized, very confusing for a variety of reasons.

A lot of competing orders, a lot of different rights have been invented. Many of which have little or nothing to do with the original notions of English craft, free masonry. These new orders are free masons in name only. They're a bunch of independent orders, loosely free mason-ish. And then in Bavaria in 1776, a professor of religious law named Adam Weisshoppt forms a group called the Order of the Perfectibilists, the Perfectionists, with a notion that through mutual aid philosophical discussions and careful advice,

it would improve morality and virtue, oppose evil, improve society, and thus reform the world. It wasn't Masonic, but it sounded Masonic, and in fact Weisshoppet took some of his ceremonies from Masonic ritual. Well, Vice Hope was an intellectual. He was born Jewish, baptized Catholic, educated by Jesuits. And now he's looking for new recruits for his new group. And he joined the Masonic Lodge in 1777. And through this lodge, he'd be friends,

and you know, and gain interest from some fellow racists who fancy themselves, also intellectuals. And they quickly changed the name of their new order to illuminati, meaning intellectually inspired. Now they are the illuminati. At first, he only convinces four others to join him and they adopt secret names and codes to communicate with each other.

And then vice-oped in particular, has to keep his role in this group of secret because he's making his living as a professor of Catholic canon law at a Catholic university under the pen name of Spartacus. Vice-tooped outline a secret plan to infiltrate the Freemasons, overthrow the governments of nations and churches, take over the world and create a new world order for that term of tolerance and equality. Yep, so the Illuminati was real. Realness sense to one dude who formed a small group with that name really did want to take

over the world and change it. And what does that make it necessarily evil though? It's like he just felt, you know, like probably what a lot of us have felt. We don't like how the system is and we wish we could rebuild it to our own designs. That's all it was. He's not like he wanted to build it to a place where people are being fucking sacrificed and you know, and he had to openly worship the devil. It wasn't like this weird and affairs. He know didn't like the governments of his day. Okay, so in a short time the Illuminati grew to about 2000 members, they expanded into Belgium, Holland, Denmark, Sweden, Poland, Hungary, Italy, France.

You know, and a friend of vice-hopes, Baron Adolf Nigg was a well-known Mason in Bavaria and assisted vice-hopes with developing degree rituals based on Masonic ceremonies. Unfortunately, the Illuminati attracted both the best and worst of aristocratic society, and its aims began to lead far more towards the destroyed government side and destroyed church side than to improve society side. And that's where it gets the evil reputation, you know, wanting to destroy churches. But again, remember the time when, you know, the churches were destroying a lot of people's lives. I think that's something you cannot argue. The Catholic Church was an oppressive regime

for a lot of European history. So at the same time, vice-hops Catholic students, the University of Ingolstadt, are being increasingly pumped full of his anti-Catholic rhetoric. The Jesuits, they figure out whose Spartacus is, and they oust him. And then as the confessors to the royalty of Europe,

they had their own network of spies and infiltrators they convinced the bit varying government to arrest them in 1784 he flees the country leaves behind his incriminating papers outlining the illuminatis ambitious plans for world domination and then their wildy published all over Europe to expose the illuminati secret plans flush out other members many of whom wound up in prison. So by 1785, the actual Illuminati has died out. And then in 1798, uh, right, 13 years later, Scottish pro monarchist named John Robison wrote proofs of a conspiracy against all the religions and governments of Europe carried

on in the secret meetings of Freemasons, Illuminati, and reading societies collected from good authorities. That's the actual title of the book, by the way. Now, you don't see too many 29 word titles anymore because that is fucking ridiculous. Apparently, he did not work with an editor. Meanwhile, a French abbot named Augustin Baroule was working on his own four-hit, or four-volume work, memoirs illustrated in the history of Jacobinism. Both of these works, or Jacobinism,

both of these works put forth the theory that the Illuminated caused the French Revolution by Roman the countryside, planting the vile seeds of Heresy, and revolt among happy and contented French peasants. Part of the rules works would later be plagiarized and rewritten as anti-Jewish propaganda, the notorious d'undhantdh

protocols of the elders of Zion. So you see how this all ties together, the Illuminati, the Zionist, the Freemasons, they're all working together to take over the world. Right? The Illuminati infiltrates the Freemasons, Illuminati are also Jewish, their secret plot to destroy the Christian and Muslim West, remake the world and its own Jewish slash-letanic image. You know, you know,

you know, and then all of a sudden, that their plan is exposed when the protocols of the elders of Zion are released, of shady motherfuckers. So you can trace all the ship back to its original sources and you find out that it's just a weird game of wackadoodle dominoes. One nut writes an inflammatory book,

slash propaganda based most on his own, you know, wild imagination and racial and religious agenda. Then another Wackadule, a Wackadule reads the original nonsense book, accepts it without hesitation as absolute fact. And it's his own Wackadule auxiliary information and then kicked out another volume to be added to the library of conspiracy. You know, his domino falls onto the next nut who accepts and adds and then hits the next nut to accepts and adds and then on and on and on.

Papers published nonsense presented to the public as fact. It's the idiot to the internet before there was an internet. It's pizza gate before there were Twitter bots. It's medium manipulation before Trump was talking about fake news. So Hitler, he believed in the Illuminati, believed it to be a mix of Freemasons and Zionists fueled his anti- uh, you know, Semitic, you know, beliefs, Alex Jones, that giant fucking turd with legs, who happens to look a little bit like a human being. He believes in the illuminati.

Alex Jones thinks that Jared Kushner, Trump's son-in-law is a member. Stop it. Trump is not part of the illuminati. It's ridiculous. All right. You don't like the guy? Fine. You don't trust him.

Fine. But can we please not go down the road that he's part of some secret society conspiracy? He is not He's a guy who has old East Coast New York City money and he just passed a tax break That's gonna give him and his social circle a lot more money and that's not part of a secret agenda Human nature of course is gonna do that. How do you not do that? He's a fucking businessman But you know, he's not a philanthropist. I don't know if people expect some times from other people And when people start pointing out all the connections between wealthy East Coast families and politicians as proof of some of the various secret society,

drives me insane. Of course they're working together. They're in the same social circle. When you are born into or require a great deal of wealth, of course you're going to have a much more powerful social network than someone born Midwest poor. Right, the CEO of one of the world's most powerful banks is not gonna be sipping top shelf whiskey and is downtime with the guy who just got out of jail took

a job as a janitor. What are they going to talk about? You know, people who are really good at making money know it's in their best economic interest to hang out with other people who are also really good at making money so they can all make more money. Right? It's not a that's not a secret society concept, you know, but George Bush is a he's a member of the school and school and bones. Yeah, so what it's a secret society Yeah, sure is so what? Well, they don't want us to know what they're up to. No, they fucking probably don't You know, they're multi-generational generational wealth

Of course they want to keep the riff rap out. They're talking about politicians and business magnets that are also close family members You know why would they want you to invite you know? Why would they want to invite you in and talk about your uncle who's got fire from the quick trip or your sister who's got knocked up by the bus boy, T.J. Friday's. You not having anything in common with someone who doesn't make a meevil, being a lead

as doesn't equate to being the illuminati. I don't know, to be fair, when I was younger, I don't think I understood this concept. I felt like, you know, being from a small Idaho town and not having any family connections really hurt my career and it pissed me off. And to be honest, it did hurt my career. A lot of career success is determined by, you know, being from a small Idaho town and not having any family connections really hurt my career and it pissed me off. And to be honest, it did hurt my career. A lot of career success is determined by who you know and for most of my career, I haven't

known too many powerful people. You know, there's a comic who's huge right now who started around the same time I did, who also interned for the president of Comedy Central. And his career really exploded and he got a lot of exposure on Comedy Central. And I remember thinking that was unfair. No, it's not unfair, it's smart. I was stubborn and dumb and jealous. And I get that now.

But I think a lot of people see connected people getting a leg up from their family connections and they want to attach the term secret society to it or agenda. No, if your dad owns a gas station, you're gonna have a better chance to get into job at a gas station than someone else who does not have a relative

who owns a gas station. Same way for the top jobs. Your dad runs an international media company. You're gonna have better financial opportunities than say, uh, my kids. Sorry, Kyle, I'm in a row. Unless you want a career in podcast research, uh, or some help learning how to write a somewhat funny story, I got nothing for you. Alex Jones, by the way, in addition to a believing in the Illuminati,

also think Sandy Hook was a false flag. Oh my god Right, you know that's a socialist snake oil selling pieces shit Can we knock off the fat false flag stuff those kids died people in Vegas died I talked to someone who watched people die in the Vegas shootings I worked in Hartford several times at a comedy club there with people who knew some of the families who were affected by Sandy Hook It should happen Alex Jones may be my least favorite American alive today. I get being curious, I get question things. This is the cult of the curious after all,

but too many people today have taken curiosity outside of the limit of reasons, or the limits of reason and sanity, and suddenly everything is up for debate. It's not, the earth is fucking round. Gravity is real, two plus two equals four. If you're questioning shit like that, it doesn't make you inquisitive, it makes you ignorant,

to sound mathematical principles. And look, I get the scientists can and have been wrong, right? You know, look at all the info we get about our diets all the time. You know, one year, you know, this is the worst for you. The next year it's okay. One time, one year eggs are terrible. The next eggs are great. Sugar's okay.

Sugar's evil. Evil, you know, fat is evil. Fat is good. If there's a certain amount of flip flopping, I understand how easy it is to go kind of X files, you know, molder and just trust no one. I get the governments have and do lie to us, I do. I get the powerful people do and have manipulated the public.

However, the scientific method is the most accurate method of understanding the world around us that we currently have going. It's got the best batting average, if you will. All right, question it fine, but please, don't give it the same value as pseudoscience. That's where we get into trouble, you know. When whack-a-Doodle ideas are given the same plausibility as academic ideas You know when you when you look at it dude with the fucking quartz crystal on his desk record from a basement the same way

You look at a guy with the doctorate I weren't trouble You know question mainstream media and investigative journalists But don't don't give them the same weight You know don't give the guy who dropped out of high school and started making conspiracy videos Same journalistic value is the guy who has a mastery of arts and journalism from Stanford and just gave a TED Talk. And I say the same for me, man. I do my best to be honest, but, you know, am I going to provide the same level of research?

Is it like a Dan Carlin? No, I'm not. He's a more thorough research than I am. Do I think you should accept everything I say at face value? Fuck no. I just hope that it sparks enough curiosity if you'd fact check me, pursue things a little further on your own. Okay, I felt that rant was a little important and related to today's topic, but, but back to free Mason conspiracies. Let's talk about trilateralists.

Holy shit this episode has really taken me back to high school. Man, growing up in rural northern Idaho in the mid late 90s, it's the world approach Y2K when the computers were supposed to shut down, the economy was supposed to collapse The one world government was supposed to take over everything was a strange experience You know, I remember people talking about the upcoming revolution. I was given the option of being excused from some classes and high school to attend a sort of a militia meeting God, I wish I had better recall and I can remember exactly what went on at that meeting teacher mind Jim up to growth He would advise me to buy and bury guns.

Stock up, man. Revolution's coming. It's all very red dawn-esque. There was all this talk about the tried ladder lists. The International Monetary Fund, the United Nations. I had one world government, the new world order. Our government was a puppet government actually controlled by a shadowy, nefarious, international regime.

I had to Jews would be hindered all of somehow and the Chinese, all very smoking, you know, smoking man from the ex-files type of shit. I remember my dad and his friends talking about this kind of stuff and what I don't remember is anyone explaining who these people actually were. You know, so who are the trilateralists really? Well, the actual name of the group is the trilateral commission. You can find out more about them at trilateral.org.

It's a non-government think tank. Right there, people get scared. What the hell are they thinking about? Why do they have to think about shit? It's just think tank, about 300 members from North America, Europe, and Japan, the dominant areas of democracy in the world. And that's it. It's group of dudes, meet from time to time to discuss how to expand and improve democracy.

Members are business leaders and former government, United Nations officials, and they meet on a regular basis to publish the papers, you know, presented at their gatherings, papers frequently about issues regarding the expanding of democracy and some of the members are freemasins. However, freemasins make up no larger portion of the commission than they do just society at large. And there's nothing secret about this group. Far from being secret, you know, you're free to contact them and obtain a list of their members. Well, I went to their website and on the front page, they do talk about David Rockefeller.

And everyone knows that the wealthy, powerful Rockefeller's are part of the illuminati, harmless group, my ass. Okay. Now I got you now. I got you now. Let's talk about the former US secretary of state Henry Kissinger, another known Illuminati member. If you look at many places on the internet, fucking lizards. Wicked leaks in 2016 did disclose secret dealings between Kissinger and the Rockefellers. There's a lot of stuff regarding secretly working with the Shah of Iran back in the early 70s, and if it's a secret, it's the Illuminati. To me, looking over the details of the meetings, it just came across as the US wanted to keep

a country that was Had a lot of oil just keep me happy. You know, of course sometimes we do shady shit involving the Middle East, right? Of course we do we have an oil-based economy and they have a lot of fucking oil Don't read a lumen out of you into that. I read a rich industry. Let's protect in their wealth into that Okay, so next conspiracy Right after the trilateralists. Let's talk about another group people on associate with the Freemason talk about the Bilderberg group oh there's the Bilderberg group another evil obviously Satanic secret society the Bilderberg group was created in 1954 by the devil himself no it's

criticized Prince Bernhard in austrobake Netherlands and is named after the hotel where they met the first year and I have to say Prince Bernard does look a little lizard-like All right, there is that this is the first conspiracy I might buy, you know, this he's at least half lizard If you really look him close this half lizard motherfucker for sure He's a member of the Anunnaki and he's been using his third eye to see control the minds of man for over 50 years From his lizard bunker two miles below sea level where he and the other lizards meet for feasts upon human virgins and cool ranch to read us wake up. It's all about virgins and Doritos. No, Prince Bernhardt was a German

born prince who married the Queen of Netherlands and was a World War II fighter pilot war hero went on to help establish the world wildlife fund clearly part of the Illuminati agenda to keep animals around. Service its first president and over the course of his long life, he was involved in a few scandals, some which involved taking some bribes. The most famous being taken abrived from Lockheed to convince the Dutch government to buy some of their planes. He eventually did admit that and he did have some affairs. Actually had some children from affairs and he richly and satanically abused some kids to fulfill his free Mason obligations from time to time but no more than like five kids so you know back in whatever now

you know you found out the buildup group at the height of the cold war to increase understanding between leaders of Europe and the United States the theory was the world war three could be averted you know in the future if the leaders of the country is involved in the previous world wars had a chance to meet and get to know each other in an informal setting. Sounds pretty goddamn reasonable. A year, a hundred government, economic and business leaders are invited to meet and talk freely without the interference of the news media or their own constituents. Some of the notable attendees in the past have been former United States President Bill

Clinton, George H.W. Bush, George W. Bush, former prime minister of the UK, Tony Blair, US Senators John Kerry, and John Edwards Bill Gates, Bills minister of the UK, Tony Blair, US senators, John Kerry and John Edwards, Bill Gates, Bills above, Henry Kissinger, Satan, Donald Rumsfield, Lucifer, Steven Spielberg. I added the devil once with all the rest of real, as well as you know, some well placed European notable conspiracy addicts. See this regular media as an evil plot for like one world government. Of course, did you get the group proposed as no legislation issues, no policy statements

and takes no votes. The participants regard it as an opportunity to chat informally with people who are their international peers, without CNN, Fox News, BBC, Huffington Post, analyzing every fucking remark they made, you know, to just on and on and on. The list of invitees every year is no secret, is made available from its office and others.

That seems 100% completely reasonable to me, especially in the social media culture we live in, I have a just people can't stand it when there's like a, when the doors are closed and they get, you know, it's like why people hate people in gated communities. You know why don't they let us in? Well, because I don't fucking like your dirty ass. Stay out, right?

Fucking build your own gate. What is so hard to understand about that? According to their website, the last get together, June 9th, 12th in Dresden, Germany, the group discussed artificial intelligence. Fuck yeah, I am so fascinated by AI robotics. By the way, new season of Black Mirror out on Netflix, they are not sponsoring this episode.

I love that show so much. What a fantastic British show. The season four premiere is phenomenal. Maybe my favorite episode so far. I've seen all the first three seasons. I liked all three of them. If you're an AI nerd, sci-fi nerd, oh god, you're going to love it so much. You will thank me. It's so good. Okay, they also talked about cyber security, chemical weapon threats, current economic issues, European strategy, globalization, Greece, Iran, Middle East, NATO, Russia, terrorism, UK,

The strategy globalization crease, Iran, Middle East, NATO, Russia, terrorism, UK, USA, US elections, the last analyst, he talked about the butcher of Rostov. What, why you do this? Why you put the chicken till in this episode? Why build their bubs? Talk about the dead killer, an wrestler of children and women.

You beating dead horse now. You beating dead horse, like a chicken till a bit soft shimcock. I had a little chicken till when they in there. I actually did an apple show I and just did I talked some people out words and they said if I if I wouldn't have slipped a chikotilo reference into the show They were gonna start chanting for it. I think they were gonna demand for it The billboard group has no association whatsoever with free maesons but conspiracy theorists not caring about facts or evidence I have made the link nonetheless

over with free medicines, but conspiracy theorists not caring about facts or evidence, I have made the link nonetheless. Okay. And then there is the conspiracy of the 33rd degrees, right? The symbolism of the Mason's 33rd degree, which is half of 66, which is almost 666. It feels as evil. Remember how this came up in the John Wayne Gacy Suckment? Last week on TimeSuck 68, with the editor of the internet, one more on thought that Gacy being found guilty of killing 33 people was kind of an obvious nod to his crimes never actually happening.

It was a false flag. He was somehow tied to some free mason shenanigans, you know, if you Google 33 Illuminati, a whole mess of wackodoodleness comes up. On a website called mysteriousunivers.org, there's an article titled, Number 33, Secret Societies, UFOs, Death, Destruction, and Disneyland. And the header pick used for the article is the Freemason symbol, and here's a little excerpt.

In her book, The Secret of the Illuminati, Elizabeth Van Buren wrote that, in spiritual numerology, the number's 11, 22, 33 are the three master numbers, the highest being 33. The highest of these master numbers was the age of the master and issued Jesus at his death, resurrection and ascension, giving more esoteric accents. The 33 symbolizes the highest spiritual consciousness attainable by a human being. Okay. Based on the website 32ndegreesmasons.org, a website of Detroit area, mason lodge here's what the thirty three uh... or being a thirty three thirty third excuse me

degree free mason means thirty thirty degrees is uh... conferred upon those members of the thirty second degree who have been outstanding in their contributions to free masonry the scottish right or who have shown in their community leadership which marks them as men who exemplify in their daily lives the true meaning of the brotherhood of man under the fatherhood of God.

It cannot be sought by application, but must be such a man as described above who has been selected by the deputy of his state. He must be not less than 33 years of age and may be elected at an annual meeting of the Supreme Council, a sovereign grand inspector general of the 33rd and last degree honorary member of the Supreme Council, such election shall be by unanimous vote of the active members present taken by a secret ballot. The degree is conferred at the annual meeting of the Supreme Council next to seeding the election of a candidate.

And many conspiracy theorists believe that the real satanic rituals of Freemasonry are carried out in extra secret meetings conducted by the 33rd degree. Masons, the rest of the Masons are called, front porch Masons or porch Masons. They're not actually led in the house for the real shit. Because there's a random Lucifer reference in Masonic literature, Lucifer the Light Bearer is known as Lucifer's name attributed and scripture to Satan, the Freemasons, especially the 33rd degree Masons are devil worshipers actively trying to destroy Christianity. All right, here's an even crazier conspiracy. There is a Jack the Ripper Freemason conspiracy.

Right? Jack the Ripper definitely a future suck. I love British history. It'd be such a good excuse just to do so many just shitty just British acts. I started to do Russian British actions. I got to I got to prep them. Anyway, 1976, Stephen Knight published, British, British, British, British, British, British, actually, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British,

British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, , British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, , British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, British, Queen of England, and Gull was a free mason who had been ordered by the Queen of the Prime Minister to kill five London prostitutes, because they knew the secret marriage between Vicki's grandson, Prince Edward, and the prostitute named Annie Crook, and there he was, he was known, was in line to throw him after his father, the Prince of Wales,

and been married to a hooker who was bad enough. Worst was that she was a Catholic and compounded in the scandal. She supposedly gave birth to a daughter. And so a free mate's on the sassan was sent to do the Queen's dare to work. An illuminati mother of a higher, of strange illuminati to hire by the way, Dr. Goll at the time of his supposed murder spring, he was 72 years old, right? He's a 72 year old assassin. He had a heart condition.

He had recently suffered a stroke. And he's in poor health as a 70 year old in the late 19th century. I feel like that's the equivalent of like a poor health at like 90 today. Right? They have lack of knowledge about proper nutrition, physical fitness, medical care. And that, that's the Queen's just brutal assassin.

Be careful for Dr. Gole. Oh, he may look like somebody who's easy to get to jump on with his walka and constantly clutching it as chest and pallid complexion and And prune like prune like skin and very slow reflexes, but you get him riled up and he'll he'll he'll take that walka and And beat you with it if you're if you're sitting down and not paying attention and he

Possibly passed out anyway sitting down and not paying attention and he possibly passed out. Anyway, according to the serial doctor, gold killed the women, knew about the marriage and child, and they were murdered according to Masonic, original. You know, the old Mason,

you know, cut him from here to here, or situation is as described in the entered apprentice penalty. Now, quick note on this penalty, because I'm not a free Mason, I cannot verify for sure that this penalty is reference, but I have found what I think

to be the entered apprentice oath. And this penalty of cutting from kind of ear to ear is actually referenced. Here's what it says. All this I most solemnly and sincerely promise and swear with a firm and steadfast resolution to keep and perform the same without the least equivocation, mental reservation or secret evasion whatsoever. Binding myself under no less penalty than that of having my throat cut from ear to ear, my tongue torn out by its roots, and buried in the sands of the sea at low watermark with a tide ebbs and flows twice in 24 hours. Should one in the least knowingly or wittily violate or transgress this, my enter to print this obligation. So help me God and keep me steadfast.

All right, so here's the thing. I get to this sounds pre-creepy and insane. That's a very descriptive and terrible punishment, but let's assume this is the correct free Mason oath. Does that mean that this kind of evil shit actually happens? I personally do not think so. I think it's dramatic theatrical language,

designed for pomp and pageantry. All right, think of this way. I remember taking another's a little kid to keep a secret You know where I cross my heart and hope to die I remember being blood brothers people. I remember not stepping on cracks. I wouldn't break my mom's back You know, well when I broke some of my secret promises I didn't die and my mom has yet to experience any back problems despite me stepping on so very many cracks occasionally wishing to inflict real damage just to realize I actually did possess incredible back breaking powers when I was annoyed with there. Oh, I'm grounded, huh?

You sure about that? Look, lady. There's a lot of cracks inside of Walker School tomorrow. And I get a 30 minute recess at lunch, okay? So there's a lot of time where you won't be able to stop me from stomping on so many cracks. Hopefully jump rope right on top of the biggest crack I can find. I'll find the intersection of several cracks and that's where I'll so many cracks. I'll play jump rope right on top of the biggest crack I can find.

I'll find the intersection of several cracks and that's where I'll do my jump. I'll hit a triple, maybe quadruple crack, 10, 20 times a minute. You wanna let me keep playing Contra? Am I an Nintendo? Or do you wanna spend the next six months in Tracks to the hospital? But seriously, we say a lot of things we do not believe

to actually be true. And if this really went on, why hasn't there been, you know, many, many more ritual murders attributed to Masonic ritual? Right? Why hasn't the government stepped in and stopped the Masons? You know, just, uh, okay, guys, all right, time shut it down. No, no, no, you cannot have a club where people cannot leave without getting a throat slit. I mean, God, you're saying that. You're actually saying that. This is very illegal. Or maybe the government is nothing but Masons and they're covering all this

up. Okay. So back to Jack the Ripper, whoever he was, he tore open a left breast or two as laid out in the fellow craft ritual. Here's what I found regarding that ritual and what I think to be Masonic literature. It says, I furthermore, promise and swear that I will not cheat wrong, defraud a lodge or fellow crafts, or a brother of this degree, knowingly or wittingly. All this I most solemnly and sincerely promise and swear with a firm and steadfast resolution to keep and perform the same,

without the least equivocation, mental reservation or self-evasion whatsoever, binding myself under no less penalty than that of having my left breast torn open, my heart plucked from thents, and given to the breasts of the field of the birds of the air as a prey. Should I, in a least, knowingly or wittingly, violator transgress this, my fellow craft obligation. So help me God and keep me stretched fast.

Okay, so again, clearly feels like some melodramatic theater language to me, right? But here's what I will say about this type of theater. While a rational person can see the, this is intense language, you know, dramatized for effect, mentally unstable person could see this as a call to action. I've worried about this with my own

kind of satirical brand of comedy. It's like, I've said some pretty crazy shit on stage. I've talked about sending homeless people, you know, military suicide missions, talked about wanting to smash the face in of a smoothie shop employee, you know, murder him, I referenced a lot of, I referenced a lot of homicide, you know.

I've talked about, on a bit, I performed a lot but never recorded murdering entire sections of society. If I were elected president, now do I really, really want that? Yes, and I want you to help me. And here's how we're gonna do it. No, I don't actually really really want it. It's just a way to vent frustration

of the types of people I'm irritated by. It's real frustration, presented in a vein of comedic absurdity. It's half truth. I do want to kill some people, but I'm not going to actually do it. However, some people don't understand sarcasm and satire. They can't draw the line between fantasy and reality and their unbalanced mind. You know, they could take a free Mason ritual and feel compelled to carry it out.

And now, does that make the whole organization an evil fellowship? No, it means they've let at least one fucking wackadoodle, you know, in as a member. So back to Jack the Ripper, Jack could open a torso, remove the organs, even burn them, as described in the master Mason penalty. And yes, this also appears to be, you know, in that Masonic ritual, more violent, more dramatic language. The other evidence was a message scrolled in a chalk, in chalk on a wall near one of the murder scenes, it said the Jews are the men that will not be blamed for nothing. And it spells Jews, J-U-W-E-S. Now, Sir Charles Warren, commissioner of the Metropolitan Police and a Freemason, that time he ordered the message destroyed. Because he was afraid that anti-Jewish sentiment would be inflamed and Jews would be blamed for the killings. There were several near rides and violence against Jews, you know, it already

taken place recently in London. I feel like that's a very valid thought. Knight's version is that Warren erased the world's word before they could be photographed in order to protect Freemason's out. Knight believed that the Jews were the attackers of Hyrum Abuff in the master Mason degree, you know, who were named Jubella, Jubella and Jubella. Again, I think more theater where Hiram is killed by three traitors who all have names remarkably similar to Judas. However, no one refers to the three bad guys

in the Master Mason ritual as Jews, Knight's theory rests on the allegations of Joseph Sikert who claimed that he had learned the truth from his father Walter Sikert, a well-known eccentric and painter of the period. But in later years, Joseph retracted the entire story, you know, gleefully calling it a whopping fib and hoax, mystery author Patricia Cornwell's nonfiction book Jack the Ripper portrait of a killer case closed. Actually makes compelling case that the Ripper was in fact none other than Walter's sicker himself. Well, despite this, Knight went on to write another anti-Messonic

book before he died in 1985 of a brain tumor after being hit in the head during a cricket match. After his death, another anti-Mason book before he died in 1985 of a brain tumor after being hit in the head during a cricket match. After his death, another anti-mason named Martin Short, not the comic, went on the radio and applied the mason's had used an ultrasound death ray to kill him. Damn you illuminati in your ultrasound death rays. God, that should always cracks me up, man. A death ray, seriously.

If they had a death ray, why don't you use it all the time? Why don't you just death ray to shit out of people left and right, you know? They were talking and talking smack about him. Why does an Alex Jones had a death ray, why don't you use it all the time? Why don't you just death ray? It's shit out of people left and right. You know, we're talking, talking smack about it. Why does an Alex Jones get a death ray? I think even if a Freemason did commit the murders and another Freemason covered up the murders, that does not mean that the entire organization is murderous and corrupt. All right, if it does, then by the same logic, we should burn every Catholic church on

earth, right? Burn them to the ground in prison, all their members, because there has been for sure an international pedophilia coverup committed by that church, right? High-ranking church members for sure definitely covered up for pedophiles, right? There were so many pedophile scandals just in the past 100 years and historically crazy men of church sanctioned murder, you know? There was that whole pesky inquisition thing, so much murder. And I have no doubt that the Catholic church did want to rule the world. They know at one point the Pope did rule most of the known world.

You know, I'm sure would love to still. I'm sure it's had many a secret medium. I'm sure, you know, secret medium still occurs a big organization. Does that mean that all of today's Catholics or that the current Catholic hierarchy is secretive and corrupt? Yes, it does. The Pope is Lucifina. And Lucifina is the Pope.

Wait the fuck up. No, I'm kidding, of course. The Pope is a space lizard, right? And his fucking Pope hat is actually a moon-based thought control device, some kind of communicator. He beams his lizard thoughts to the moon through his Pope hat. That's why it's big.

It has a lot of room for the fucking electronics. And then the lizard's working in the moon, you know, in the moon's dark control base, they beam the thoughts back to Earth's free-macing logins. And then free-masons beam the thought manipulation waves to the communities around the lodges. And if this rant is ever cut out of context and put out on the internet and goes viral,

there is very good chance I will ask to be a guest on the Alice Jones show. Anywho, I think you get my point. The corruption of a few members is not inherent proof of the corruption of an entire organization. That's a little logic problem with these conspiracies. And speaking of Alex Jones, before we discuss more conspiracy and more free masonry, let's check in with that wonderful idiot of the internet. Idiot. Idiot. Idiot.

Idiot. Idiot. For today's idiocy, I googled Alex Jones Dream Adicence. An old video came up called 360 degrees in Masonry. Oh man, he just, he just goes bananas and he gets, you know, starts talking about the Rothschilds, you know, and he starts talking about how like, man, all this stuff is, you know, Illuminati stuff.

It's all there in the encyclopedia, just the Rothschilds have been funded in illuminati assassins, it's part of documented history, you know, back like the 18th century, no, it's not. No, it is actually not part of documented history. Now, because Alex Jones, though, in this video, I watch, he did not go as crazy as he normally does. He actually kind of stood up for some parts of Freemasonry.

His followers turn on him in the comment sections. Fantastic. First comment is from user Sam London. Alex Jones is a Mason himself controlled by the elite. Right. Right, that makes sense. The elite are forcing us to literally tune to go on YouTube every week

and make insane conspiracy rants. That makes total sense. They're putting him up to it. They're putting him up to it. User Chris Cornerstone posts Alex Jones, aka Bill Hicks is a controlled opposition shill a CIA asset. Okay, if you don't know who Bill Hicks is, he was a fantastic underground comedian who actually died of pancreatic cancer, day to 32 and 94. And he's a huge influence on my comedy. I list knew his albums a ton my first few years in the road, and he would have hated Alex Jones.

He was also a conspiracy guy, but not this sort of snake oil salesman, actual demons are controlling our government. You know, the illuminati is putting poised into the chemtrails, you know, kind of guy that Alex Jones is. It's a minute of two thoughts, but he didn't take that far and he wasn't. It's gonna mean spirit as Jones can be.

And he was born 13 years before Alex Jones, but Mr. Cornerstone thinks that they're the same person. Now, they do look like they could be cousins, but, you know, Hicks died. I know one of Hicks is best friends, comedian Dwight Slade, who would recognize his childhood friend and former roommate if Hicks was Jones, if he had somehow morphed into Jones. And this YouTube nut thinks the CIA faked Hicks death. So he could stop being amazing comedian, who's just about to break through and be famous and morph into an alt-right lunatic Media pundit like because that's what the CIA wants to happen. That's what the elites need to have this shit

It's so convoluted. It just amazed me when some of these people I just picture them in a basement just fucking connecting dots on a wall You know, it's like it it just, it screams like schizophrenia or something. It just screams like mental illness. It's so out there. Like, but this human being out there, at least one, like in his day-to-day life, he just believes that this comedian from the 80s was fucking, his death was faked by the CIA.

And then instead of being like put into hiding, he's just reborn as Alex, like what? How does that fund any agenda? I don't get it. Okay. Then, then there's user Thomas Gamble. Oh, this is, this was a rare idiot. It was start gold. It's gold in this here. It is, this Thomas Gamble idiot gold. This guy, he is fucking something else. He doesn't seem to understand that you can write a lot of commentary and just one YouTube post, he posts 11 times in a row. His first one, he says, type in Collins bloodlines and you will find the website and explain

John Todd, he was real. Okay, so I did design structure. First site that comes up when you Google Collins bloodlines is Bibliotheca and it's Playadas, Playades. And I looked up Biboteca playadez. And according to rational Wikipedia.com, it's a website that archives information about alternative medicine, conspiracies,

new age, paranormal, pseudo history, pseudoscience, and UFO. Love it! So it's so good. It's content is written mostly in English. Spanish makes up a significant minority of content, about 35%. Biblioteca Pliedes is Spanish for Pliedes Library.

Unsurprisingly, much of the information gathered has claimed to come from the Pleiadians. And the Pleiadians are a race of aliens, supposedly, who are very concerned about the well-being and future of humanity. And they're named after a collection of stars from where they came. Yes, this should just keep getting better. of aliens supposedly who are very concerned about the well-being and future of humanity and their name after a collection of stars from where they came. Yes, this should just keep getting better.

There's a bunch of people out there who truly believe that an alien race known as the Pleiadians are working with the fucking New World Order and Alex Jones is one of their puppets. Oh my God. Well, the Collins bloodline is according to this fantastic website, one of the top 13 illuminati families in the world. And here's just a little taste of what is written about this. This is great. The following is a description of a highly secret, high level satanic meeting.

It comes via an ex insider who is now a Christian. If any other ex hierarchy person is reading this perhaps this will trigger some memories for you. This experience dates to 1955. This is a meeting that is held twice yearly, and to which the Rothschilds and all the other mother families attend. The meeting is inside a big room. And the grandmother on the throne was a Collins.

The Collins family has been kept out of the limelight because they have more occult power than the Rothschilds or the Rockefellers. To make money, this Collins family does something financially such as deal with the exchange of money. I love the vague understanding of what they actually do. Right? Just look, I can say with certainty that these people at the top of the Illuminati,

they are the highest level. How do they make their preposterous amounts of money? How do they fund their occult agendas? Well, they do something with finance. Yes, that's how they make money. They do something financial. They do something in the realm of finance. If you fucking idiot, then the insanity goes on. I've noticed that numerous columns have been insurance executives.

And although I haven't exposed the connections between insurance companies and the new world order, there is a book out which shows how they, how, which shows how they, this is his quote, fucked up, it doesn't make any sense, which shows how they most insurance companies are connected and under the guidance of the new world order elite. Oh, so that's why insurance premiums are so high. It's not because these fuckers are always squeezing their customers to increase their profit margins to a piece of Wall Street shareholders. It's because the insurance companies are under the guidance of the new world order elite.

Yes, of course. It's the only thing that makes sense. Insurance CEO is bowing before the reptilian overlords, yes. You will raise your premiums by a 7% in the coming year, and you will also let 14% more humans die of curable diseases. We have Americans right where we want them. If only we could infiltrate the Canadians. Damn them and their socialized medicine. Why do they make it so hard for us to control them? America was so easy to topple.

How do these wily knacks thwart us at every turn? And now more awesomeness. The Grandmother Collins, dressed in black, has an ebony and gold moon-shaped throne that she can automatically rotate by pushing a pedal with her foot. Behind her sits the Grand Council with 13 members. This might be, or might not be. The Grand Druid Council those you will read about further on. I love how cartoonishly evil this is. It

really is like a cobra commander or something or like a skeleton or it's just like fucking preposterously childishly evil. Right? Get the fuck out. There's this lady sitting in her moon throne all in black just rotating, rotated around controlling it with her pedals as the 13 council members sit around her like this is some weird Star Wars, you know, evil empire shit. This has never happened. What an exciting imaginary world

some people believe in, living, right? People who believe in the shit. I wish a study could be done to show the correlation between the level of education and belief in the Illuminati. I'm guessing a significantly higher level of people who never finish high school believe in the Illuminati compared to people with PhDs. Okay, so back to the post of Thomas Gamble. I didn't have time to find John Todd. I mean, he wrote like fucking 50 pages on just this one block. There was so

much nonsense. It would have taken hours just to explain this one, one post. But here's a second thing. He says Collins is Illuminati and they use Hollywood a second thing. He says, Collins is illuminati, and they use Hollywood through the conspiracy. He says to through the conspiracy, but that's why it's hard. This guy doesn't write there. Well, to use it, Hollywood, to throw the conspiracy in front of your face, the entertainment agenda is covered up by the star group controlled by Kissinger. This group is under Tavistock behavioral think tank since 1919 a worldwide or international organized I love worldwide or international. It's either worldwide or worse. It's international. It's a fucking same thing, dummy. Our national organization controlling

all colleges and universities for siops collecting children children for use, manipulations of colleges, MK Ultra, etc. Oh, so that's why I couldn't break into television when I moved to Los Angeles. You know, it wasn't because I refused to take acting classes and then I hated auditions and I was very bad at acting. It's because the star group had not indoctrinated me. They hadn't deemed me worthy of furthering their new world order agenda. Damn it. I got a phone, and only went to the right party. You know, and met the right, you know, cloak wearing eyes wide shut, mother fuckers. I could have gotten a sitcom. God dang it.

And then Thomas goes on and on, and it gets really, really hard to understand what he's referencing. It just gets more and more insane. He does leave this little idiot nugget at one point. He says, the purpose of Disney, a Luminati member, look it up. Sci-fi is to put the truth in front of you so you would not believe it. Hide the truth in plain sight. That's a phrase they fucking love conspiracy just lunatics.

Hide the truth in plain sight. Oh, the Disney, the Disney movies. That's why they're making sci-fi movies. Here I foolishly thought that all of these superhero movies, they were making, they were doing it because superhero movies have a built an audience of comic book nerds and they make hundreds and hundreds of millions of dollars at the box office fucking consistently. And then hundreds more millions

through international distribution, and merchandise licensing. Like a total moron, I thought it was about money. Lots and lots like so much fucking money, so, so much. But no, turned out, it's to pave the way for the arrival of the Illuminati, right? It's to allow them to roll out their futuristic agenda right in front of us. You know, it's to allow them to roll out their Illuminati agenda, which apparently has something to do with Thor and Captain America.

They're Captain Illuminati. Well, like Google this time is gamble to see if he has a website. And of course he does. Of course he does. How could he not? If you're curious, it's WatchmenForJesus.com. He's the Watchmen, you guys. He's the Watchmen.

I can hear some of my Christian listeners groaning right now. Just, why do these fucking idiots have to make us look bad? Look, I know this dude does not represent Christianity. I really do. I also know that I need to share a tiny sampling of one of his most recent blog posts because it's fantastic. He recently posted a timeline for the New World Order

and it's very long. It's over 83,000 words long, which would equate to like six full time suck episodes. So clearly way too much info to discuss here, but here's a fun few little moments. So by December 20, 1781, the Masons and Illuminati agreed to form together in a marriage not really known by Masons

under the 33rd degree unless they study on their own. Many people tend to blame the Jews for our problems, but they are, but they too are for the most part also slaves. Jewish law does however govern the entire world. Yep, the whole thing. You see, we are cows. The IRS is a company who milks the cows and the United States is the veterinarian who takes care of the herd and great Britain is the owner of the farm.

Okay. 1826, one captain, William Morgan decided it was his duty to inform all masons in the general public that the full proof was regarded the Illuminati their secret plans intended objectives reveal the identities of the masterminds of the conspiracy the Illuminati properly tried Morgan and absentia and convicted him of treason remember him from a part one William Morgan he was the mason who was going to expose the secrets than he was kidnapped likely killed all right he was never tried for treason uh man but here's here's everything we talked about it's all it's all there with tomis man fear of secret Jewish leaders

you know they control the world the law controls the world free mason luminati agenda the connection to william morgan's disappearance the old lies and half troops just keep swirling around these nutters heads home i got a lot of the fucking milk cow analogy well as much fun as i'm having i don't have a full week to devote to only tomis gamble uh... his idiocy never ends.

It never stops. But we are done with him today, at least on today's Idiocyte Internet. Idiocyte, I'll be into that. Okay. Next big important conspiracy. Did you know that Washington, D.C. was built by George Washington as a monument to the devil himself. No? Well, congratulations. You're not a paranoid superstitious moron. Massachusetts Avenue, Rhode Island Avenue, Connecticut Avenue, Vermont Avenue, K Street, Northwest, do four

me five pointed pentagram. Our nation was founded by an evil Freemason who turned out very capital into a portal to hell. This is what some people actually believe. You know Thomas Campbell believes this shit. Well, it turns out old Georgie Freemason watched him did not have a lot to do with the design. Washington hired Pierre, Charles Levin Fonts, to create the design of our new federal city, but it was the Secretary of State Thomas Jefferson, who made the initial recommendations

of building in street placement, based on the topography of the land, and his own ideas, and Thomas Jefferson was not a Freemason. And even if they did choose to build the streets into a five-pointed star, that doesn't mean that they were honoring the devil. Not everyone chooses to believe that a five-pointed star is an evil symbol. Where does that symbol actually come from? It does show up with the free Masons. A free Mason appendent group, the order of the Eastern Star uses it.

I feel like most of us, people like myself who were raised Christian or are Christian, have just been told that the pentagram was assembled to devil. I feel like most of us, people like myself who are raised Christian or are Christian, have just been told that the pentagram is assembled to devil and it does show up all the time in a cult film and literature. So why? Well, the pentagram, the five-sided star is one of the oldest symbols in humankind. It goes back around 8,000 years. It goes back to the cradle of civilization, back to the Tigris, Euphrates, Reeds and the

Middle East. It shows up in Christianity, Islam, Judaism and more. It's used by modern wikens. It means different things, different people. you Freddy's Reeds in the Middle East shows up in Christianity Islam Judaism and more Jews by modern wikens. It means different things different people. You know, for Wikens for example the five points represent Earth, Sky, Fire, Water and Spirit. Showed up with the ancient Sumerians, five points believed by scholars to represent either the four corners of the Earth and the Vault of Heaven or the five visible planets of the night sky Jupiter, Mercury, Mars, Saturn, Venus with Venus as a representative of the night sky, Jupiter, Mercury, Mars, Saturn, Venus, with Venus as a representative of the Queen of Heaven.

In ancient Greece, the Pythagoras called the pentagram, they called it Higia, also the name of the Greek goddess of health, and saw in the pentagram a mathematical perfection, which would later come to be known as the Golden Ratio. Golden Ratio is a special number that I will not claim to fully understand. Not having a strong, hard science background, but it's found by dividing the line to two parts so that the longer part, divided by the smaller part, is also equal to the whole length divided by the longer part,

is often symbolized using phi after the 21st letter of the Greek alphabet. The number can be seen in ancient architecture like the great pyramids and the Parthenon and the great pyramid of Giza, the length of each side of the base is 756 feet with a height of 481 feet. The ratio of the base to the height is roughly 1.5717, which is close to the golden ratio. Plato consider the Ratio to be the most universally binding of all mathematical relationships, later Euclid linked the Golden Ratio to the construction of a pentagram. DaVinci himself used the Golden Ratio to define all the proportions in his last supper.

That painting, including the dimensions of the table and the proportions of the walls and backgrounds. The Golden Ratio also appears in DaVinci's Vitruvian man, the famous sketch of the dude, superimposed into two arm and leg positions, and the Mona Lisa. Other artists who employ the Golden Ratio include Michelangelo, Raphael, Rembrandt, Salvador Dali, others, the Pythagoras, so named after Pythagoras, mathematician, you know, back in six century BCE, eight eight five hundred bc uh... who he encourages followers to uh... to seek out truth knowledge meant and and they were driven underground due to some political uprisings and

revolts in fifth century agrees bce that they haven't been the wrong side of uh... the politics and they they use the pentagram to identify themselves to each other signing letters and communications with it well during this time the pentagram represented the five points of a human being, two feet, two hands, one head. Then in medieval Europe, this symbol began to be attributed to the occult by various theologians and authors like Heinrich Cornelius Agrippa.

Then in the mid-19th century, various religious folk of the day decided that a pentagram, with one point up was good, but a pentagram with two points up was evil. I think this is similar to the whole upside down cross phenomena, which I get on some level. Like if a symbol is considered, you know, to be like the best, like, it's similar to be godlike, heavenly, then I guess the exact opposite, the inverse of that must be hell evil. So like most of our ancient symbols, the original meaning is no longer the current association,

the pentagram has mathematical roots not satanic roots. There are so many other conspiracies like that Alistair Crowley was a Freemason, you know future time suck topic Alistair was a British occultist. He was an astrologist of chemist, a heroin addict, a sexual predator, a dude who loved to shock the public, loved to scare people. And he wasn't recognized though as a member of a regular Masonic Lodge. Again, because there's no central governing agency, some irregular lodges, such as one in Mexico, did claim him to be a member.

Again, those places can pop up and claim to be Freemason lodgers, but not actually follow Freemason teachings. The Freemasons are also supposedly behind the faked moon landing. They supposedly founded the KKK. They're part of the Bohemian Grove Secret Society. They founded the IRS. That's right, when you didn't get that refund you were hoping for. Don't get mad at the IRS.

You get mad at the freemasins. Damning freemasins for taking my tax return. 9-11 terrorist attacks were planned by the freemasins. Time suck was started by freemasins. And I got well, I feel like a real asshole for holding this back from me the whole time, but Nimrod is actually an ancient Freemason god. Yes, Nimrod He's mentioned the Bible in the books of both Genesis and Chronicles. He was a king of Shinar Part of ancient Mesopotamia. He was a mighty hunter before the Lord and he began to be mighty in the earth

And he historically has been associated with the Tower of Babel Well legend has that he built it and who could build such a massive monument in Syria aka Mesopotam with the Tower of Babel. Well, legend has it, he built it. And who could build such a massive monument in Assyria, aka Mesopotamia, the cradle of civilization referenced as a land of Nimrod? Who could build that tower nearly tall after each to heaven itself, the Freemasons? That's who, yes, Nimrod is the original leader of the Freemasons.

Even listening to Freemasons read this whole time. He was also there for the Temple of Solomon, how, because he was not a man, he was a God, is a God. And he put part of his Nimrod spirit He was also there for the temple of Solomon, how? Because he was not a man. He was a god. He was a god. And he put part of his Nimrod spirit into various historical warriors. And then God destroyed his tower of Babel,

and that's when he got really annoyed. He got annoyed about it, and he created Lucifina to tempt God. And he commanded the Freemasons to scatter around the earth and set up lodges to either control the world or confuse and irritate scared dumb people. Which is it? Only Nimrod knows. It is only his will to tell. Hail Nimrod. Now he has his follower, Stompcock, or Spaniel puppies to death to pay tribute to him because that is symbolic.

Don't you get it? The puppies are smashed to represent God smashing his precious tower because he loved his precious tower in a way that we love puppies. I think, look, it is all very confusing. Nimrod is to be obeyed more than he is to be understood. Only Nimrod understands Nimrod. Sometimes, sometimes he is confused by himself. And we are only to understand, you know, that we are to hail him, I think.

So hail Nimrod. Whew. Okay, I'm back. And we might have one more legit conspiracy to talk about. The Knights Templar conspiracy. There was a Masonic order that called us out to Knights Templar. The dates back to 1895 and it's current form. Templar by the way, according to everything I've found,

can be pronounced either Templar or Templar. I like Templar. Okay, so in any real sense, you know, the modern Freemason order, it's associated with the original Knights Templar, just in name only. The group made famous in American pop culture. By Dan Brown's DaVinci Code, the book, and then the movie about the Holy Grail actually

being Mary Magdalene who Christ impregnated in the night's template, I've been protecting Christ, bloodline, etc., etc., all fiction, all speculation, wackadoodle domino plane. Because there was secret order as well, in some senses, there has been historical speculation about the night's template really, you know, having found the Holy Grail with the Ark of the Covenant, and that it was actually some type of powerful object, capable of turning the tides of war. And whoever had it could use it to rule the world. And then the mythology of the Knights Templar gets woven into the mythology of the Illuminati,

which gets woven into the Freemasons. And you know, any supposedly bad or evil secret society seems to end up getting associated with Freemasonry. And now some conspiracy theorists think that the free mason slash luminati possess whatever powerful religious object or bloodline the templars you know once found my favorite graphic novel actually goth ns a preacher graphic novel to him uh... the mc show is based on a does a hilarious parody of what the night template is actually guarding very irreverent but very funny if you're not easily offended uh...igious-wise.

And this is not for the squeamish or the sensitive. Anyone, or anyhow, I don't think anything important is being hidden by this group of Freemasons. The Masonic Nights Templar is an unusual order, though, from what I've found, it does not accept members from a variety of faith. It only accepts Christian members. Okay, so that's some analysis of some of the conspiracies around in free masonry, and why are there so many? You know, if they're smoked, there has to be fire, right?

No, actually there doesn't. I think the reason there's so many conspiracies is because, A, they use a lot of weird symbols, and they have unusual ceremonies, and that kind of shit has always scared the hell out of a large number of idolatry of fearing Christian fundamentalists. It just has.

That's not a shit non-immotive, it just opposes their belief system and kind of freaks them out. When these people get scared, they tend to blame the devil. So he gets to say, Tannic Association, and then B, they're arguably the most successful secret clubhouse the past few hundred years in terms of total number of members. In a good amount of those members, it has been historically significant people. Whenever a lot of different members of the same group become very successful, it screams conspiracy to certain people.

Just the game is rigged, man. You can't get ahead unless you're in the inner circle. They're pulling strings, man, wake up. And then finally, there's C, the whole secret, keeping things, secrets drive people insane, which is why they're so fun to keep. I can't wait to have a variety of secret suck code words inside jokes, maybe get some handshakes going. Why not, man?

Maybe get some new symbols. Eventually, it's fun. I get it now. But some people assume that if information is being withheld, it's harmful information. It's bad, evil information. That's what I think. Or who knows, though, maybe they're running the world. It's not like I've been to the meetings.

They all say they're not, but if they were running the world, that's exactly what they would say. Damn you, Illuminati! Okay would say. Dam you illuminati. Okay, time for some top five takeaways. Time suck, top five takeaway. Number one, the all seen Freemason Eye is not based on the illuminati. It's based on the biblical Old Testament God.

At least that's what the devil told me at a secret 33rd degree Scottish right ceremony. Number two, the tritelateralists are not trying to take over the world, they're trying to make it better. Stop fearin' some sort of new world order and accept that some version of that is inevitable, actually, the world is getting smaller and smaller, we'd have to work together to keep it going.

Number three, the real Illuminati never had more than 2,000 members and it was squashed well over 200 years ago. They never took over shit. The fake Illuminati is more active than ever and they have taken over everything, including time suck. Number four, not only do the prodigals of the elders of Zion or protocols of the elders of Zion have nothing to do with Freemasons,

they also have nothing to do with Jewish people. It was anti-Semitic Russian propaganda and comically plagiarized propaganda at that. And then number five, new info, there is a current Freemason ruckus that happened in England right now. Masons in the police in London have been accused of covering up for fellow members

and favoring them for promotion, according to an issue of the Guardian, just a few days ago. When the late Sir Kenneth Newman became commissioner of the Metropolitan Police in 1982, he outlined his thoughts on how his officers should behave and what became known as the little blue book All right his passage on Freemasonry noted delicately that the discerning officer will probably consider it wise to forgo

The prospect of pleasure and social advantage in Freemasonry so as to enjoy the unreserved regard of all those around him They warned him not join the Freemason's more than 30 years later It was coming to surprise to many that membership of the Freemasons still causing disquiet within the four Steve White, the retiring chair of the Police Federation, which represents rank and file officers told the Guardian. At this past week, he and his colleagues suspected the Freemasons within the service have been hampering reforms and acting in an obstructive way. I find it odd that there are pockets of the organization where a significant number of representatives are free-masons.

So they may not control the world, but free-masons may have been controlling certain portions of the British police force. Critics of the free-masons say the organization is secretive, serves the interest of its members above public interest. The free-masons, over England, are to say that they're once again being unfairly discriminated against. Still controversy over the secrecy, the battle over who they really are and what they are really up to, rages on.

Okay, part two has been sucked. Praise both jangles, praise my grandmother, fucking McDonald. Big thanks to sweet suckers, James, so much soul velvet ingram. They may not have appeared in today's suck, but they sucked in spirit. And so much free masonry was stuck. I hope you enjoyed it. It's one of those kind of never-ending episodes, or potentially never-ending episodes. So I just threw what I thought was the most interesting in there, and hope I'm entertaining for you. If you want to learn more, I guess you're just going to have to join a lot, you know, or if you're a lady sucker, convince dude dude you know to join in and make him share all his secrets. A big thanks to Todd McCommus and Barstool Sports, the guys at the Heartland Radio podcast. What a fun show man.

The Heartland Radio podcast so much fun. You can hear the episode I was on today. It's out now. Such good chemistry, such a funny group of dudes. And I love the structure of the show. And Barstool Sports Studio Pat McAfee or Maccabee, excuse me, built in Indianapolis is unreal too. Man, basketball court, free weights area, huge workstation area, producers booth, nice for the most radio stations,

just impressive. So well done guys, well done. And well suckers, as shown on the at secret space lizards Instagram, we are announcing the contest invites now to the 2018 space lizard elite event hosted at the time. So, okay, quarters right here right here in CDA Idaho. This is a private, small gathering of space lizards. Come hang out with me, the time suck team. Come eat other space lizards.

Bond is a real cult of the curious. The qualifiers to enter the contest were, one, write a message explaining what it means to be a space lizard. You know, email it, email it to a harmony velocamp. Post a selfie in your time suck swag. Use the hashtag space lizard elite entry. And then comment on your favorite time suck episode. Well, the winners of the 2018 space lizard elite event

are Megan Howell and Thomas Moore. So congratulations from everyone at time suck. Megan's favorite episode is Scientology and the heavens, I guess it's a tie. Scientology and Heaven's Gate cult. And Jim Jones is three way tie. She said she loves a good cult. Megan Andrews says,

what's cracking time suck team? Hope your fuckers are great. I love it. My name is Megan, I live and breathe a suck. I started listening around the time to that bonus episode about Vlad came out. I've been a really big Dan Fan, coining that term since standup comedy

was available on Pandora. Never had the pleasure of seeing him lie, but it's honestly always been a huge hope of mine that I would. Being a time sucker means so much to me because I don't feel so strange anymore for wanting to learn about weird as fuck subjects like age-h homes or the blood counts. I don't feel like the odd one out when I'm talking to suckers and I bring up how interesting I think the way Vlad would have impaled people is.

The suck community is so unique. It's a beautifully strange family of people that come from all walks of life to learn laugh. I'm really is so unique. It's a beautifully strange family of people that come from all walks of life to learn laugh. I'm really bad with writing. I'm more of an oral person, huh? Yeah. Basically, I fucking love time suck

and I super fucking love being a sucker. I love that being a sucker means to be part of a group that embraces knowledge instead of hiding from it, which is really hard to find. So hail Nimrod. And thanks for creating the suck and shit. Meg, J. Hellowitman loyal sucker. Oh, well, thank you Meg Very very very nice. Thank you Megan how that was I really appreciate that and then the next entry was Thomas

You know, and Thomas says his favorite episode was chief crazy horse. That's cool. I like that Thomas's entry says dear lizard Reverend doctor cadet harmony says, dear lizard reverend doctor, cadet, harmony, servant to the almighty suck, noblemen and godfather, doctor, comets. To me being a space lizard means being part of something that is much larger than myself.

I fell in love with Dan's style of comedy in July 2016. Just so happened that soon after you had a small show in Moscow, Idaho. Oh yeah, it was luck that I even heard about the show and it was even more luck if you get a last minute ticket. After that show, I knew I would follow Dan's comedy for us in my life.

And this is when he also introduced me to TimeSuck. After this show, for about two weeks, I binge watched all the episodes and quickly felt at home with the podcast. Part of this, I've never felt such a strong connection towards a group organization in my life, but I am all in. Being part of a secret space, Lizard's makes life more bearable. A few people in my life have had the opportunity to fill their mediocre earholes with a pleasant tickling sensation. That is the suck. But as I spread the word, I see that there is no unsatisfied customer when it comes to suck. Well, that's, that's nice. Just a couple of people on iTunes who disagree.

But that's very nice. To me, the cold of the curious is a way of life. And I couldn't imagine my life without it. Being a space-lesser means screaming triple-am, with the top-year lungs, Jammotham, sirk, just to realize that you are the only one there that has been enlightened with the teachings of our sweet Reverend Dr. Dan Cummins. I love everything that time suckers taught me and I love being part of the mildly crazy

at always amazing cult. Yeah, that's fair. Please, please, please, choose me to be, to get the hang out down. Well, you were chosen. You're inferior lizard friend, Thomas Moore. Awesome. That is awesome.

Thanks, Megan Thomas. You guys truly suck so hard. You'll be receiving your official personal invitation via email shortly from our events coordinator, Harmony, in honor of all this suck love. Time suck will be sponsored with one more ticket to the event next week. So same contest rules apply. So just see at Secret Space Lister on Instagram for details, contact Harmony Velocamp at Harmony at TimeSuckPodcast.com on how how to win find out the last golden ticket.

I'm so glad people are excited about that. It's also strange for me. It's funny. It's a comic you put yourself to be the center of attention, but I'm actually socially never very comfortable with that. So I'm grateful and uncomfortable in a good way. Okay. Time for some more quick tour dates.

Abrea, California, March 8th to 11th, Charlotte, North Carolina, April 8, Atlanta, April 9, Birmingham, Alabama, April 10, Huntsville, Alabama, April 11, Nashville, Alabama, kidding, Nashville, Tennessee, April 12, San Francisco, Alabama, April 25, 22, 27, this California. Sacramento, Alabama, you get the job by now, May 10 through 12, Tampa, Alabama, Lahoy California, Alabama, Tampa,ah, California, Alabama. Tampa, Alabama, Miami, Alabama. West Palm, Alabama, Chicago, Alabama.

More Alabama dates coming up. About a few dates and Texas, Alabama as well. Houston, Alabama, and Dallas, Alabama. If you don't, I don't know why I love that Alabama right now. If you don't already, listen, time's the time's like app, show notes, podcast, player, more starting in February.

Place you'll be able to download and listen to the secret. Suck five bucks a month for secrets suck each week. New standup album exclusive merch access ability to vote on topics 20% discount non lizard merch. Two new albums. Brief is in recorded material coming out. You know one on Pandora on January 24th more info soon. You can listen to it all in order.

You don't have to bounce around like a normal Pandora station. Another album, feel the heat. It's going to be for the premium space lizards. You'll be able to sign up for that soon on Patreon. I'm actually meeting with the BitElixir app developers today. I'm going to figure out a solid timeline to get everything done. And if enough of you sign up, become space lizards, I will be able to continue to add more features to the app, build out the community of the cult of the curious. And also the time stock time sucks store other than stickers is currently completely restocked hoodies hat teacher to more all the time suck podcast calm thanks to Sydney shy for killing it on social media harmony velocamp for organizing all this fucking positive energy with it get together and

more Jesse dobner for kick ass editing work on the first two thirds of this episode man I sent it to him last minute I feel terrible but he still fucking stayed up late worked on it thanks to all of you who write and listen, spread the word, buy merch, come to shows. God, I love meeting you guys at shows. Click the Amazon link at timesluckpodcast.com, support the show while you shop. And thanks for spreading the word with your families

and friends, man, I met people in Minneapolis, so they brought all their coworkers who now are time suckers, and it just fucking makes this whole thing possible. Appreciate the wonderful iTunes ratings and reviews. 2,300 reviews now man we're keeping those bonus sucks coming and it helps so so much when you review man do it anywhere do it everywhere every review helps it's like how Yelp works for a restaurant. Someone's looking for a new podcast they look at the reviews you spread the suck every

time you do that. Okay next week the Jersey devil. Bo Jangle research, research in turn extraordinaire Rebecca Lilley has given me a huge stack of Jersey devil research to suck into this next next Monday. The legend of the Jersey devil goes as least as far back as the 1700s. Believers are convinced this creature is immortal. Some have claimed to see it die, only to see it come back again. Some describe the creature as having horses had bat wings in a tail. Perhaps some ancient rival of Nimrod, something to devil is a

tarot actle. Just, you know, just a lone tarot actle somehow still surviving in Jersey. Something to Jersey devil spring forth fully formed from Bon Jovi's teed up butt rock banks during a shot to the heart on core after a show in Atlantic City. Something to Jersey devil is currently the president of the United States or at least lives in his hair. Okay, maybe only I have tossed out Bon a Jovian Trump's possibilities for the Jersey devil, but there are a lot of possibilities out there. We're going paranormal on the suck next week and I'm excited. I have a rock hard excitement boner for the Jersey devil devil and I cannot wait to suck it. The Jersey devil, not my own boner. Okay, now that it's nice and awkward, let's get into some of those time-soaker updates. Rupdate? Get your time-soaker updates.

First update from an anonymous Freemason who writes insane. In regards to the Freemason episode, the part I pronunciation thing, here in the bif is pronounced Hyrumabuff. Thank you. I think I got that right earlier because of your update. Armstrong, Glenn, and Aldrin as well as a good amount of astronauts or brothers. Steve, Wastniak, co-founder of Apple's brother, Freemason, the Wild West, Buffalo Bill, David Crockett, even the Duke, John Wayne, brothers. I guess because it was just cool thing to do back in the day. Some say

the plan in the Boston Tea Party was made in the Masonic Lodge, the green dragon Tavern, Tavern at the bottom, Grand Lodge of Massachusetts upstairs. Truman, President Truman was the Grand Master Mason of Missouri, and his funeral had a secret Masonic portion to it. Similar how there is a picture of Washington, at the cornerstone ceremony in every lodge, there is a picture of Truman in full Masonic, Grand Lodge regalia, somewhere in every lodge as well. Man, secret funeral portion, no one are you guys, back in people think you're weirdos. You guys may want to rethink the secret funeral rights. That screams evil society, you have to know that. After listening to two, three mason sucks,

I hope you realize I don't actually think you are evil, but you are begging for harassment and speculation when you have a secret funeral right. And yeah, when you say the Wild West guys and the Duke, join because it was a cool thing to do at the time. I bet a lot of people join for that reason, right? I mean, why a lot of us join a group, it seems cool. I really appreciate the extra info, Mason's Sucker.

Sounds like you guys have a cool thing going and that you've had one for a long time. Next update comes in from a time-sucker considering becoming a free Mason, time-sucker, a Patrick Lisk writes in saying, dear master of all that is sucky, my intro actually, as someone who do with my question, after listening to part one of your suck on free masonry,

I decided to try and sign up. While I cannot wait to be a space lizard, I have been looking for a way to get more involved in my local area in Ohio. I was surprised to find that the third requirement on the Ohio page for free masons is the belief in a higher being. This seems to go against what you and the other masons

you spoke to within the cult of the curious had said, have you come across anything in your research that might shed some light on the best way for me to participate in the maasons locally if I personally am atheist. Okay, so I did look, he sent me the link, I did look it up, hopefully some maasons, I hear this and right back in and know what some answers. I wrote Patrick back saying he should call the secretary of the lodge. I found there was a number on the site that I found through the link and just asked the

secretary of atheists or permitted to join. I looked at the sign out for this particular lodge and it does say that it requires a belief in higher power to join. I do know that one of the official tenants for entry into Freemasons is belief in a higher power, but I also know that some lodges have softened on that stance. I'm guessing it's a lodge by lodge decision and especially with membership low in many areas. I feel like as long as you have the overall interest in being a good person and becoming a better person through free masonry and you're willing to pay some annual dues, you're going to get a shot

at joining. That's what I would think, but maybe I'm wrong. So free mason suckers let me know if you could. Another mason question comes in from Time Sucker, Brandi, Skardina. Brandi writes, just listen to part one of the free masons before listening, the only thing I knew about them was from a friend who used to be in a club of sorts where girls would serve dinner to the masons. They weren't allowed to speak during this. I don't know.

As a mother of girls, it seems off to me and I'm curious what that's about. I believe it was called Job's Daughters. Well Brandy, according to what I found, I looked some stuff up based on your question, Job's Daughters International is the name of the Freemasons group you're thinking of. Now it's an organization of young women between the ages of 10 and 20 who are related to a master Mason, of the Daughters of Master Masons, and according to FreemasonInformation.com, throughout the year, they perform service projects to help the community less fortunate other charities

they actively support the hearing impaired kids endowment, hike fund which purchases hearing assistant devices for hearing impaired children they teach individual leadership by holding various offices within Joe's daughters various scholarships are offered on a state and national level and according to literally every other website that came across about them they are the girls are sold in a human sex trafficking for the entire period of membership, which I personally find a little disturbing.

They're moved from lodge to lodge. They're forced to participate and say, Tannick sex rituals with old Illuminati men and they're still in overlords. But you know, I mean, if it's your group wants to do that, then what the fuck, who am I? You know, you get in the way of that. No, of course that doesn't happen. Of course I made up that last shit. No, they're just, you know, they seem to be

just a girls youth group for daughters and mastermasons. And again, you know, I do remind you know that Freemasons are a fraternal order, so it is a men's only club. The silence while serving thing is probably just some kind of tradition. I don't think they have to serve every meal or anything.

Based on what I've found, it's not like that's what their organization is about. It's not like you sign up just to become a silent meal server to the free maces. It does not sound like that's the purpose of that organization, which would be alarming. So I hope that information was helpful. Final update from the wonderful Midwest time sucker Laura Spears.

I met Laura and her boyfriend, David Halsley. This past Saturday in Indiana, talked to them for a while after the show asked Laura to tell me what David had given me after the show because he gave me a little gift and she said that he gave me a CB combat stitch. This is the second time recently veterans give me some after the show that they earned in service and I felt like I could have teared up both times, man, just such an honor. David asked me to look into the CB's and here is a brief description of this organization. The CB's formed a naval construction force, the United States Navy.

Naval construction battalions were conceived as a replacement for civilian construction companies working for the US Navy after the United States was drawn into World War II with the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor. These guys just didn't build safe places. David saw a combat, he saw death, he worked on building barriers between Pakistan and Afghanistan, and I cannot thank him enough for his service. The CB's would consist of skilled workers that would be trained to drop their tools if necessary and take up their weapons at a moment's notice to defend themselves, which they've had to do many, many times.

And their history, their motto, it was can do. And since 1955, CB's have been sent to Antarctica for numerous construction missions where they are clearly building a flat earth ice wall. Damn it David I knew you're illuminated for a second. I saw you. I knew it. You've been down there hiding the truth. You fucking NASA puppet Seriously, they do head down to Antarctica and build things like a 6,000 foot long ice runway on a Mercurdo sound runway on Mercurdo Sound, McMurdo, sorry, McMurdo Sound, that's a weird, that sounds like a lumininity, McMurdo, McMurder.

Hmm, they do all kinds of stuff though, for real. So thank you, David. And thank you to all of our service men and women and their families for protecting democracy and protecting shit like the suck. ["Mercurdo Sound"] Thanks, time suckers. I need a net.

We all did. So that's all for today. It's all for today. Happy birthday again to Josh, our engineer. Happy birthday to my kids too. Happy birthday to Kyle Irman-Roe. I'm in row. She's turning 10 tomorrow and Kyle is turning 12 on Friday.

Got dang it. Bubba's 12 and Monlo's 10. They grow up so fast and they are amazing kids. I am lucky to have him privileged to be a part of their lives. Love those two little humans with all my heart. And if you ever become part of the Illuminati kids, please help out your dad. Please, please, please.

Also, for the rest of your lives, keep on sucking. Oh, shit.