Timesuck with Dan Cummins - 70 - The Jersey Devil

Episode Date: January 15, 2018

The Jersey Devil. Is it a kangaroo-like creature with the head of a goat, horse, or dog? Most agree that it has wings, hooves, horns, and a tail. Where does it come from? Many describe a dragon-like creature. Or does it walk on two legs like others have reported? Some say it can fly. Legends say it has killed. It supposedly once survived a cannonball blast. It emits a blood curdling scream. It might be a pterodactyl. It can die and come back. It is almost certainly demonic. It murdered it’s own human mother and some midwives moments after its brith before flying up the chimney. It has a NHL hockey team named after it. There’s a chance it worked as a roadie on Bruce Springsteen’s Darkness tour in the summer of 1978. Okay. Maybe I made that last one up. Let’s head to Jersey, back to the it’s beginning, and crawl into the darkest corners of the Garden State to solve the enduring mystery of the Jersey Devil, today, on Timesuck. Trouble with the APP or new website? Email BitElixir! (you'll have to copy and paste - sorry) [e-mail] Merch - https://badmagicmerch.com/ Want to try out Discord!?! https://discord.gg/tqzH89v Want to join the Cult of the Curious private Facebook Group? Go directly to Facebook and search for "Cult of the Curious" in order to locate whatever current page hasn't been put in FB Jail :) For all merch related questions: https://badmagicmerch.com/pages/contact Please rate and subscribe on iTunes and elsewhere and follow the suck on social media!! @timesuckpodcast on IG, @timesuckpodcast on Twitter, and www.facebook.com/timesuckpodcast

The Jersey Devil. Is it a kangaroo like creature with the head of a goat horse or dog? Most agree that it has wings hooves horns and a tail. Where does it come from? Many describe a dragon-like creature or does it walk on two legs like others have reported some say can fly Legends say it has been killed. It's supposedly one survived a cannonball blast. It emits a blood-curdling scream It may be a tear-adactyl. It can die and come back. It's almost certainly demonic. It's murdered. It's own human mother and some midwives moments after it's birth before flying up a chimney. It has a NHL hockey team named after it. There's a good chance it works as a roadie on Bruce Springsteen's darkness tour in the summer of 1978. Handling soundcheck duties and replacing guitarist Stephen Van Zance signature bandana.

Whenever he either sweated through it or when he felt like a new bandana was needed to help him get into the correct artistic zone to play certain songs like Born to Run. Okay, so maybe I made up the spring scene ship. The rest of this info does come from historical accounts. So when did the legend of this creature originate? What do people think this creature is?

What does it want? Is there any cryptosoological basis for the legend or do the origins of the Jersey Devil have nothing to do with the beast at all? Let's get weird time suckers. Let's head to Jersey back to the beginning. Crawl into the darkest corners of the garden state to solve the enduring mystery of the Jersey Devil today on TimeSuck. You're listening to Top7. Happy Monday suckers, Hail Nimrod, Praise Bojangles, Begon Lucifina. I'm Dan Cummins, this is Time Suck, Happy Martin Luther King Jr. Day. I would do a Time Suck on Dr. King, but it's already been done.

It's already been sucked. One of my faves actually, Time Suck 42, if you haven't checked that out already. Recording from the sucked engine again today with Josh Krell watching the levels, tweaking the sound a bit again since last week, trying to find that perfect spot, which will be continually adjusting in ways you won't even notice.

Couple quick tour dates, I hope you're buying tickets too, and then it's on to the Jersey devil. Super cool time sucker update this week, regarding getting out of a traffic ticket, due to being in the cult of the curious. That has happened now, which I think is fantastic. Providence Road Island, January 19th and 20th. That's this week, comedy connection.

Get over there, damn it. Come see me this weekend. Again, no show in chickpea Massachusetts on January 21st because the venue went out of business, didn't tell anybody. Hope that never happens again. Philadelphia, January 25th to the 27th, get to the punchline, Baltimore,

January 28th at McGubbies, tickets on sale now, Chicago, January 31st to February 3rd. Tell me that you're coming to Zanies, Rosemont Zanies, amazing comedy club. One of my favorites, New York City, Gotham Comedy Club, one night only February 11th. Finally getting back to New York, Detroit, February 16th, the Magic Bag, Inferndale with the boys from the small town murder, James and Jimmy, one show swap cast, other standup

standup show almost sold out. Minneapolis tickets on sale, standup shows March 2nd and 3rd, very limited tickets, the live time suck in Minneapolis already sold out. I did tell you tickets would go fast and they went real fast. So sorry for those of you who cannot make that. Cleveland just added to the calendar. March 22nd to the 24th. Another live podcast added in Spokane watched in one show only Sunday, May 6th, more announcements at the end of the show, including some more tour dates, got some new dates in Texas, Tejas. And now it's Jersey Devil Time.

To learn about the Jersey Devil, we got to head to the Pine Barrens, Jersey, Central, Southeast Jersey. Got to talk about some pine culture. Pine Barons take up 1.1 million acres. The Pinelands National Reserve, America's first national reserve established 1978, 22% of New Jersey's total land area, largest body of open space on the middle and seaboard between Richmond, Virginia and Boston, Massachusetts. Now while there are no towns in the reserve today, there used to be several. You know, there's ruins and ghost towns are found throughout the dense forest.

There's old towns, places with names like Rattlesnake, Asas town, Calico, New Egypt, populated by people referred to as Pines. Living conditions in the sandy, acidic soil of the Pine Barrens was hard. The land was considered unfarmable by early settlers and those who decided to live there were considered to be the drags of society by East Coast city folk and even small town northern New Jersey folk. The pineys were fugitives from the law or poachers, moonshiners, runaway slaves, disordered in soldiers.

Early pineys, as barons residents called themselves included Quaker to have been expelled from their meetings for fighting in the revolution revolution outlawed smugglers Tory loyalist known as the refugees who despite their politics wrote in packs killed and robbed indiscriminately Well, Pines also they mind bog iron during colonial times which appears to be as horrible as it sounds A lot of revolutionary steel was carried out of the pine barons. Bog iron is literally just chunks of bog or big chunks of oxidized iron, giant rocks, that you dig out of the bog mud from what I saw online.

The rock size wise, there'd be somewhere between the size of a cantaloupe, the size of a small watermelon, and you dig them out of the mud. You collect them from the bottom of a pond, you carry them to have the iron smelted out of them. Very low tech type of mining, light on equipment, heavy on back breaking manual labor.

Dude with shovels, literally just digging rocks at a nasty old bog mud, or even worse, dude without shovels, digging rocks out of mud. I just picture some poor dude, and it's you know, radial boots, just poke around in the mud with a stick trying to find a iron rock. Ah, sounds terrible.

And many of the pines minding this bog or they were part of a culture of living off the grid. Various cabins sprinkled throughout the forest. These pines were poor people. They found the Jersey equivalent to the poor appellation people of West Virginia and the backwoods, rural folk of Kentucky. I can picture the Idaho County, the Idaho County equivalent where I grew up.

There was this family that I would see growing up. I'll just refer to them as the Johnson's, so I don't embarrass any of them, if they somehow listen to podcasts now and have shown up in civilization. I worked at a grocery store in Riggins, when I was in high school. And sometimes I would just work early in the morning

before school started and then before you know Stock and freight just you know before it kind of opened up well the johnson's would come down from their family Mountain Ranch about once a month for supplies and they'd come in early before the store opened They'd stock up on flour sugar butter other perishables can food and just take several shopping carts A shit back up to the ranch far away from town and other than that other than occasionally grabbing a bunch of fuel as well, no one would ever see them. They avoided town as best they could. And they looked like people who have been cast in some strange hillbilly movie, like like deliverance. If you've ever seen that old movie straight out of deliverance, straight out of like the people under the stairs, hills have eyes, dental care, not a strong family priority. They did not have even a passing, casual interest in toothbrushes or toothpaste.

They were not stocking up on a lot of toothpaste when they came in. They were not stocking up on a lot of geoderate, not buying a lot of shampoo and conditioner. Probably didn't know what conditioner was. I didn't see any big pants as soap in general. And they looked off in addition to literally just, you know, smelling pretty offensively. And looking like literally like a layer of dirt on their skin. They just had facial characteristics that seemed to correlate with generations of invigorating and pornotrition.

I know this sounds horrible, but if this family popped out of the movie, if you saw him, you'd be like, oh shit, what the fuck? Like, yeah, just a very kind of backwards-y look. Like there's a reason the characters look like that in movies. And it seems like the backwards of the Pine Barons and New Jersey had some of these families. And this rural backwoods area of Jersey

served as kind of a cultural petri dish for growing the strange, strange legend of the Jersey devil. There was old dirt roads cutting through the trees to clay factories and paper mills and wood mills cranberry bogs. You know, back in the 1918 centuries where some of these pine trees worked along the roads were roadhouse in's taverns where outsiders were rumoured to have been robbed and killed. You know, some of the characters you can watch on HBO's Boardwalk Empire came from this rough and rugged place like Ennoch Johnson. He's a real-life

inspiration for Bouchemis. Steve Bouchemis made in character in Atlantic City, Kingpin, Nucky Thompson, great show by the way. And Sopranos. The Sopranos referenced the Pine Barans and Pinees and there was at least one Sopranos episode where Polly and Chris got stuck out in the Barans. And the May of 18, article appeared in Atlantic Monthly, which described the culture of the inhabitants of the Pine parents as aboriginal in its savagery. The residents were referred to as pine rats and described as people, barely human,

and their squalid living conditions and be sotted and brutish in their ignorance. Change. This isn't a, you know, literary article, just like, oh, he's fucking people are animals. It sounds like this Johnson family I remember though. In the early 1900s, the living conditions and inhabitants of the barons were so concerning to other people that a eugenic study was carried out by an American psychologist, Henry H. Goddard, and this study labeled the pines as genetically inferior, almost subhuman, like a group of intellectual

and fears. I mean, Jesus. God had was looking into a genetic cause for what he labeled feeble-mindedness, which was a general category of conditions which included mental retardation, learning disabilities, and mental illness. He studied the ancestry of a Pine Barren's woman by the name of Eva Wolverton. I changed her name for the book. I was a real name born in 1889, and according to Goddard,

Emma's tiny family was, her family tree was just full of nothing but criminals, inbreds, folks with various levels of mental retardation, basically a bunch of lazy, good for enough delinquents, you know, with no moral compasses. Just bunch of like cousin fuckers, like you just painted the worst picture of these people. And all of these conditions were traced back by Goddard to some kids born out of wedlock generations prior he just came to his weird conclusion that this initial moral

lapse you know these bastards born out of wedlock with the origin of all kinds of undesirable traits and this living a sinful life could genetically destroy your lineage and you actually published a book the calakak family that's a name you made up for this family. The student named it was wildly successful, a book that warned people that, you know, sheakin' up with the wrong guy or gal could just annihilate your family tree. You know, you take up with the girl from the wrong side of the tracks and suddenly your kids are just gonna look like extras, you know, from the hills have eyes, you know. Cheat on your wife with a piney and you're gonna end up having a couple of three-eyed

hunchbacks living under your front porch, you know, just snacking on neighborhood pets. They've managed to snag with their critter like raccoon paw hands. You know, I was, I've been thinking about jangles, you know, was an immortal former inhabitant of a lannus, a profit of Nimrod, a time traveling fighter of communism. But maybe he just some kind of pining carny. What if our fearless one eyed, three-legged mascot did not lose lose an eye did not lose a leg in an epic battle with Zeus Right, what if he was born one-eyed and three-legged because his mom was also his sister cousin grandma and somehow even his uncle as well What if his dad was his half brother first cousin and stepmom?

What if he wasn't fighting communism in South American jungles with triple M? Yeah, I'm old time sir What if he was selling elephant ears and running the tilt world for some Atlantic City carnival? Anywho. Gotter's book and finding him said, but since been discredited, he's a total quack. But at the time, he stereotyped the Pines as a bunch of poor, uneducated, inbred, deviant hillbillies. And the public at large just laughed it up. They totally believed his assessment. And if you're wondering who bojangles this and

what that was all about, you need to listen to some more episodes. Alright, don't you get your shit together? Hell no, I'm not. Well, Goddard was far from the only historical figure to malign these poor people. In 1913, a researcher named Elizabeth Kite published a report called The Piney's that included tales of heavy drinking, livestock being quartered in children's bedrooms, and widespread in breeding. Here are some of Elizabeth's findings. She says, Several children lived in Shaxx with the woman in successive male companions, or vice versa,

to whom they may or may not have been married, but to whom each could have had bloodline ties. The women were not prostitutes. They were adamantly defensive of their men, who were often abusive, but they saw no wrong in having a frolic with another man. Nor did they object to their own man's wanderings. Children's raised in this atmosphere had no example of moral conduct. Saw no need to alter the pattern of existence, and so continued to perpetuate and spread this contamination.

Existence was basically hand to mouth. Wants were simple, cleanliness practically unheard of and venereal disease rampant. Wow. Sounds both horrible and amazing. Back when I was 21 year old dirt bed, you'll pine barons might have been just a place to hang out, right? Have some bachanelian utopia. Well, she allegedly witnessed the fallon incident firsthand said the husband swore at Meg over some soup she had cooked, and said, I'd like to know whatever I married you for. Twitch mag replied, because old Dory Foster made you. That made the husband matter, and he broke the soup plate over her head.

When the couple was arrested some time later for instigating the children to break it into homes and smash it and scattering the possessions. The father was glad of a legal opportunity to leave. Meg having mothered 11 children, two illegitimate and four in state mental institutions said she'd get out and get another man. It doesn't even sound real. It's so over the top Second thought maybe it maybe it's always on several maybe it 21. I would have hated it It is just like cartoonishly hillbilly, right?

Sounds like a utopia from Rick or Andy and Rodney Bobby You know hot damn Rick or Andy. Oh, we don't found paradise and not hardly any working Not hardly so responsibilities homemade, lots of baby making, but the babies don't do raise themselves. Oh, you preaching to the choir, or band, band, rabbi, boppin', or just like an old homeless, not a mama sister, girlfriends.

They don't raise you, cook for you, make a man out of you, or make a man out of your friends, party forever, party forever. Oh, now let's go hunt that down, swamp devil. Ooh, it's gonna kill that kangaroo bat. Oh, let's go get some kangaroo bat soup for breakfast supper Mixering just that level of just nonsense. Well a lot of people did not think it was utopia

They were disgusted by what they'd heard was going on in the pine barons and they wanted to do something about it This is unbelievable to me in In March of 1913, Woodrow Wilson resigned as governor and went straight to the Pine Barons and just started fucking fucking as many pines as he could. And he's had 78 pined children. No. He resigned as governor of New Jersey, become 20th President of the United States. And then the Senate president of New Jersey, James F. Fielder, Democrat from Jersey, said, are you succeeded succeeded Wilson as acting governor, began campaigning to keep his new job come November, and he campaigned largely on the platform of reforming the people who lived in the wilderness of Pine Barrens.

Right, all of this was, these people were fresh in Jersey residents minds, thanks to that recent publication of Kite's report, and he was going to do something about this blight upon society. Well, according to a newspaper account, Fiel or Travel to Burlington, New Jersey, Burlington County, and was introduced to a 31-year-old South Hampton farmhand in his 18-year-old bride. The man's third marriage to date with no record of divorce from the previous two. And they were so unfortunate looking, he vomited all over their dirty, piny faces. And these two degenerates, far from being defended,

were happy to have a free meal. They licked most of his puke off of each other's faces, now to each other's beards, and they fucked right in front of them. Both making steady, creepy eye contact with the politician the entire time. The moment they were done, a newborn gremlin popped out of the woman's butt, snatched the startled governors wallet, ran up a tree, while the gremlins' parents broke in some kind of banjoe duet.

You know, just, well, look at here, now, I've got some pig. Take you as pig. I ever did lick out of my woman's beard Well looking here now. What's the full belly? I made a butt baby with the woman oh mine and the governor's wallet we got All right, he didn't vomit on your faces, but he was disgusted with him The pine the piney farmhand recently had been released from jail on big-and-me charges He didn't vomit on your faces, but he was disgusted with him. The Pioneer Farmhand recently had been released from jail on Bigamie charges, which authorities were forced to drop. When it was revealed as previous two wives had been married to other men at the same time, they were exchanging wedding vows with him.

So technically, the farmhand had never had previously been legally married and was not a bigamist. Bigamie cancelsing out more bigamie. That is just some next level Hillbilly backwoods Tom Foulery And for some journalists the acting governor quiz the farmhand on the month and the year on the mandraublank That is pretty bad makes me feel a little better about usually not knowing what date is The wife wasn't much better Somehow managing to work into a conversation that she had no idea who her father was

as multiple spouses were were long standing family tradition and the governor morely outraged felt he had to take drastic measures to keep the degenerates continue to breed he had the state must segregate and sterilize these people particularly the mature ones he said that the to busting evening transcripts and the news made the wire services uh... the headline uh... in the Boston newspaper on June 28th 1913 was new jersey degenerates and it said terrible conditions found by governor field or among the pines segregation and sterilization advocated that is a holy shit as backwards as people

were in some ways the turn of the 20th century It was not common especially politically to just openly advocate sterilization Especially advocating sterilizing white people This is white people wanting to sterilize other white people at the dawn of the 20th century that shit was unheard of Rightly or wrongly the Prime Minister looked at is just being so cartoonishly Impoverished and morally bankrupt. There was just nothing to be done with them Other than just to sterilize them and just to prevent more Pines from from showing up, you know Well, look at here now. I got some poop. Tessie at puke. I'm a dead lick. I'm a woman's beard

Well, look at here now try to get a wife, but you had too many husbands But at least I won't have to go to jail. Just, you know, they don't have to rhyme. Remember, these aren't talented musicians. Okay, so while an influx of tourists and modernization has changed the culture of the Pines today, there are now a middle class and wealthy Pines. There still is a stigma on a chatroom online. I found a comment left by someone in 2010, who states their grandma said that the pioneers were, quote, dwarves who are hostile to outsiders. And he asked others that this was true.

So random to add dwarf. Like I'm not sure what that has to do with being backwards. They were in breeders and thieves and living in squalor and lazy. And worst of all, they were far shorter than the average man. I will not visit no place, no how, full of in-bred lazy, saving short people. The Pine Barrens, you know, that area is still seriously impoverished.

As of 2016, over one in three Atlantic city residents lived below the federal poverty line, meaning that either made less than 12,000 a year as an individual or made less than 25,000 a year as a family of four. God, man, reading about all this reminds me of working at Child Protective Services in college. There was some incredibly impoverished little rural communities around Spokane. We're known in the family and I'm not just doing this comedically, it's just the way it was. No one in the family

had all their teeth. Most had very few of them. It seemed especially like the front ones, some of the important ones. No one had a high school education, drug abuse common, you know, and just, yeah, just no care for personal hygiene or basic nutritional needs. And I, in a few occasions, had to accompany a social worker and remove children physically from a truly squalid,

just a pauling living condition situation, had to take kids from parents who truly should not be allowed to be parents. So I will say is horrific horrific because it sounds part of me does understand the the want for sterilization when you just see kid after kid born into a home That is just a fucking nightmare. You're like why are these why are these people? Allowed you just to keep creating More hardship and just keep adding more hardship into their treats.

There was one lady, she was a sex offender. The state would take any kid that she gave birth to, just like from the hospital. She was not allowed to ever keep a child again. She was pregnant every year for just many years in a row. It was just like, what the, just like, fucking a foster child factory, just a human foster child factory.

When you see shit like that, you're like, ah, okay, I'll fucking listen to your stylization talk. Okay, so while there was a lot of unnecessary slander regarding the piney's base and everything I've read, I have no doubt that life and the pine barons for many, what's, you know, back woods is fuck. I was reading one article where an author said that in some parts of the barons,

you might only be five miles from some cute little tourist trap of a township, but suddenly it feels like you're three time zones away, you know, in a completely different culture. So the more I read about the Pine Bears, the more I tell about horror movies, you know, it's something that kind of plays where crazy, acts, wielding, hill folk, chase around college kids, you know, standing in the cabin, you know, on spring breaks, some kind of B movie, slasher flick. If any Piney time suckers think this assessment is way, way off by the way, please write

and correct me. I will eat my words. So whether or not it really is as backwards as article after article, after article claim. There is no doubt that it is in these woods where the Jersey Devil legend was born and where it is most often been spotted. So what exactly is the Jersey Devil? Let's talk about some possibilities. Is it a bird? That's one theory. One theory is that the Jersey devil is a bird. Possibly a sandhill crane. Crane used to live in South Jersey until it was pushed out by man. Sandhill crane weighs about 12 pounds. It's a four foot high wingspan of 80 inches. A voids man. But if confronted it will fight. It's good with a knife randomly. They found a lot of to find a lot of, they would collect these birds, attracted to shiny objects.

And sometimes they would just like, guess what they're mouse, whatever they're like, they would kind of like, you know, just pick up a knife. And then kind of like, so weird, but kind of like a, where's that goal? It would like store the knife kind of under their tongue.

And sometimes when confronted, it would just kind of like spit, like half spit out like a pocket knife and just, you know, stab a motherfucker. So that's made up, I just made up that knife stuff, but that'd be amazing if that was true. Had a wingspan of it, yeah, 80 inches, you know, and we'll confront, if confronted, we'll fight. That part's true.

Loud scream, that part's true. Loud scream has a whooping voice can be heard in a distance. That could account of some of the screams heard by some of the witnesses. Crane also eats potatoes and corn. This could account for some raids on crops that have been attributed to the Jersey devil of the witnesses. Crane also eats potatoes and corn. This could account for some rage on crops that have been attributed to the Jersey devil over the years. Also, the crane has a head of a demon prefers to taste a human flesh and shapes you

up in time travel. So, you know, that could be looking, you know, yeah, right. Probably not a crane. The crane theory does not explain the killing of livestock. It's been attributed to the Jersey devil. It doesn't explain why people describe the devil as having a horse's head, bat wings tail. You know, I haven't seen a crane with those attributes.

There's a tarot acto theory. It's crazy. It's crazy, is that sounds? It is crazy. Man who goes by the name of Professor Brawlhuff may or may not be a professor, since his name only seems to appear in cryptosoology books.

And he never lists the college he supposedly teaches that or has taught at. And he has said that the tracks were made by a prehistoric animal from the Jurassic period because there's been tracks kind of like big foot, foot prints that are found from time to time they'll find these hoof tracks and it's a Jersey devil they say, well he thinks it's a taradactyl, you know that's preposterous. Well Reverend Dr. Professor Brauhoff, he believes the creature has survived underground in the cavern. Another expert who claims to have

worked at the Smithsonian Institute, he doesn't have a LinkedIn profile to verify that, also has a theory about ancient creatures surviving underground. He said the Jersey devil was a teradactyl, but the Academy of Natural Sciences can find no record of any creature living or extinct that resembles a Jersey devil resembles it. What the fuck? How is one teradactyl gonna stay alive in a cave for at least 65 million years? What is it eaten? You know, more importantly, how is it gonna avoid dying of old age?

Did I miss hearing that teradactyls are immortals, that they're highlanders, that they don't die on their own? They can only be killed? I feel like I would remember that from school. Is there some type of anti-aging cavern out there I don't know about in Jersey? Is that where the fountain of youth really is? Should I be living in a cage?

Does Jennifer Aniston live in a cage? Is that why she always looks the same? Should I be living in a cage with Jennifer Aniston? Should I leave my family for Jennifer Aniston? There's so many questions, it's all very confusing. Should I kidnap and murder Reverend Dr. Professor Brawlhopp and dump his body in a cave? If I did that would have come back to life. I don't know. I don't know. That sounds crazy. There's the Deformed Child Theory, which is Jack E. Boucher author

of Absagami, yesterday, whatever the hell that is, has a theory in which he believes the Jersey Devil is Deformed Child. He thinks Mrs. Leeds, the woman most associated with the legend, has his figured, piny child, kept it locked away in a house. I'm not kidding. She grew sick, couldn't feed the child anymore. It escaped that of hunger, raided local farms for food. This theory does not take into an account the incredible lifespan of the devil. The child would have had a 174 years old in 1909. It doesn't account for the sightings of the devil flying. And I don't think a kid who's locked up in a room Somewhere for years once he or she gets out is gonna be able to figure out how to live off stolen goods

But I mean sometimes these things you know do happen and then all of a sudden you know future Cidings are just people's imaginations based on an original legend But I just I I don't know I highly doubt that it was a deformed trial I feel like somebody would have just caught it. Somebody would just, you know, got a hold of the poor kid and we figured it out. There's, you know, the thought that it's just been a series of hoaxes, you know, it's just a bunch of practical jokes.

I mean, possibly, but the Jersey devil has been seen, you know, at least according to them by reliable people, such as police, government officials, postmasters, businessmen, as opposed to just kind of piny rift raff. I mean, you know, unfortunately, none of them have any good documentation for these sightings, but you know, they seem to have believed it. As for the hoof prints, if even if some were hoaxes,

there's no way explain, I mean, maybe all the tracks, you know, how some ended abruptly as if the creature took wing. I don't know, but I also think that some people are really, really good at priceless jokes. I actually had some buddies in college that lived over in Seattle and on Snowquamie Pass, they would, they got a gorilla suit and they would just, on the Seattle side of Snowquamie Pass, they would just like all of a sudden run across the freeway and this gorilla suit

and run back into the woods. Like, just do that just to make people believe in Sasquatch, just because they thought that was hilarious. So, you know, people do weird shit. And, you know, people can do a series of practical jokes, for sure. Okay, there's the, there's the embodiment of evil itself. Many people believe the Jersey Devil

is the very essence of evil. You know, it's an uncanny harbinger of war, kind of like a moth man. You know, it appears before any great conflict, Jersey Devil was cited before the start of the Civil War, it was seen right before the Spanish-American War, World War I. 1939 before the start of World War II. Mount Holly citizens were awakened by the noises of hooves on the rooftops. The devil was seen on December 7, 1941, right before the Pearl Harbor was bombed.

Seen right before the Vietnam War, you know, all allegedly. You know, if only someone had a decent pick. Man, note to piney time suckers, please Please still what you need to steal to raise money for a camera of some sort. Figure out how to teach your in-bred Piny fingers how to work a camera. Stop having sex with your cousins and siblings for one day. Lay off the moonshine for just a couple hours by camera so you can get some Jersey devil proof. Another another Jersey devil origin stories is the result of a curse. It was a young leads point girl who had fallen low with the British soldier.

The British had come to the region because of the iron furnaces at Batstowe Village, you know, where they were supplying the privateers with a steel. And remember all that bog iron? In 1778, the British engaged the Americans at the Battle of Chestnut Creek, the town's folk opposed the match calling her liaison an active treason, and they cursed the girl, according to legend, she later gave birth to a child, and it was the lead's devil.

Well, I guess that explained it. Why did I just state that earlier? She was cursed and she gave birth to a devil, and those are the facts. Next creature, next time suck. Variation on the tale tells of a young woman who encounters a passing gypsy back in for food. She was frightened and refused, and passing gypsy back in for food she was frightened and refused in the in the gypsy cursed her

uh... for refusal years later in eighteen fifty with the curse forgotten uh... when the when the girl gave birth to her first child a male he became a devil and fled into the woods uh... all right this is going to be what happened for sure man who was more capable of cursing than a piney gypsy that's like that's a gypsy squared only human more capable of cursing is a gypsy piny carny, a true immortal.

A gypsy piny carny is unkillable. They can live years on just a few bags of cotton candy in a jug of moonshine. They can hibernate in their tear-dactyl caves. Is it the product of a Halloween ritual? That's a theory. You know, it was in October of 1830, a resident of Vienna, New Jersey, Mr. John Vallette.

It was entertaining to children with a mask he made, a mask of a monstrous face. It became a yearly tradition adopted by other local townsmen. Popularity grew, repeated late in October's parents and children alike, put on scary faces and caustic, nah, I don't fucking buy that for a second. All right, so these are the main possibilities

I've seen tossed forth by the web. Before we can suck into where I think the legend came from, let's go over some Jersey devil sightings. These are some of the most prominent alleged sightings, doled out in no particular chronological order. The Jersey devil went devil crazy in 1909 when nearly 1,000 reports came in from my witnesses throughout South Jersey and the Pine Barrens. That year a track walker on the electric railroad saw the, saw the devil fly into the wires above the tracks.

There was a violent explosion which melted the track 20 feet in both directions. Nobody was found the devil was seen later in perfect health. Yeah, either that happened or he did something really stupid and fucked the tracks of himself and was terrified of getting fired if you worked for the training out of a company or you getting sued if he didn't, and he made up the whole thing to save his ass One of those things happened While testing cannonballs at Hanover Mills works in the Pine Barons Navy commander Stephen Decatur reportedly saw the creature and shot it the cannonball blew a hole in the devil But it wasn't phased by the projectile strange tracks were found in fields But bloodhounds allegedly refused to follow the tracks. There was so much hysteria over the monster. Schools and the pine barons were closed.

Now, I should state here that this account only shows up in cryptos uology type websites. This account doesn't even mention in Stevens lengthy Wikipedia page. So probably never happened, but what if it did? I mean, can you imagine if you're that kid and you're already living in some backwards lifestyle where superstition is to be run rampant. Education level is low. Your dirt poor, your parents are first cousins,

piney first cousins who actually breed, not just Albert Einstein first cousins who just cousin fuck for fun. And now your school is closed because there's a monster in the woods and the Navy is hunting, that's the Navy is hunting but it can't kill. I mean, holy shit, if that were real,

a lot of terrified kids laying wide eyed in the raggedy button up, I mean long undies, and they're cold, you know, scrap lumber shacks that night. A lot of tiny parents, you know, put their banjos and harmonicas down, you know, sitting on their moons, shine jugs, put their hands on the shotguns, you know, sitting in their way out in the dark woods, knowing the police are looking for an actual monster nearby,

hearing all the strange sounds the forest makes at night. Is that a possum? Is that a raccoon walking across the porch? Or is that a monster about ready to smash to your front door and tell your family from limb to limb? Maybe you couldn't kill it with a can of what chance do you have with your little 22 bolt action rifle. You probably luck it to have a 22 if you're a fucking piney.

I got a slingshot with a half rotten rubber band to pull back on. Or did you know what is that a deer that just stepped on a small branch and cracked it or is that the Jersey Devil snap in your dog and half? Oh man, you know, Joseph Bonaparte, uh, Bonaparte, the brother of Napoleon, one time king of Spain, he claimed to see the devil. This claim actually does show up on mainstream sites,

unsuccessful in defending Spain against England during the peninsula wars. He was forced to advocate his throne in 1813 following Napoleon's defeat. He went to exile in America. Joseph purchased 800 acres at Borden, Town, and Jersey because it was between the two great seaports in New York and Philadelphia, place where he could obtain the very latest news from France and Spain, build himself a lovely mansion with the beautiful landscape grounds, plenty of park land where he entertained many of the great men of his days,

such as President John Adams, you know, the Marquis of Lafayette, Daniel Webster, he led a glamourous social life, throwing marvelous parties, mountains of food, many guests. He also lived on the edge of the Pine Barons, dangerously close to some filthy piney's. And one day, a band of brother cousins and their wife's sister, moms came a limpant in a crawling and a scurry and up to his mansion.

And they chanted their incantations and they beat on their tobacco can drums. And they whooped in the e-hod and they opened me fornicated the Jersey Devil into existence. And I'm on straight to former monarch sharing his kill with his backwood revelers. And that is what the recipe for canned pork and beans is actually based on. Weezer was actually singing about the Jersey Devil. Fucking wake up everybody. No. That is horse shit.

That is complete nonsense. Here's what's actually happened. Once Snowy afternoon, the ex-King of Spain was hunting alone in the woods near his house when he spotted some strange tracks on the ground. They looked like the tracks of a two-footed donkey. Bonaparte noticed that one foot was slightly larger than the other. Obviously some kind of in-bred, pinyed donkey. Bonaparte noticed that one foot was slightly larger than the other. Obviously some kind of in-bred piney donkey devil. Tracks ended abruptly as if the creature had flown away.

He stared at the tracks for a long moment, trying to figure out what the strange animal might be. At that moment Bonaparte heard a strange hissing noise. Turning, he found himself face to face with a large winged creature with a horse-like head and bird-like legs, astonished and frightened, he froze and stared at the beast, forgetting that he was carrying a rifle for a moment neither of them moved. Then the creature hissed at him, beat his wings and flew away.

When he reported the incident to a friend later that day, Bonaparte was told that he had just seen the famous Jersey Devil. And I'm guessing his friend told everyone he knew that the former King of Spain was losing his fucking mind. Bonaparte was captivated by the story of the Jersey devil. Thereafter kept a lookout for the fabulous creature wherever he went hunting. Once things settled down in Europe, Joseph said goodbye to the barons, reunited with his wife in Italy, and never saw the Jersey devil again. 1927 taxi driver in Salem City allegedly encountered the Jersey devil while changing attire. The man told the police that a wing creature was pounding on the roof of the cab.

Guess the Jersey devil really needed to ride that night. 1957, the Department of Conservation found a strange corpse in a burned out area of the pines, partial skeletons and feathers, hind legs of an unidentifiable creature. The devil was thought to be dead, but when it reappeared, it reappeared just when the pines thought they were saved. Pines, as if your lives are already hard enough, it's your malnourishment and your inbreeding and the constant socioeconomic judgment.

Now what devil monster is back to each of dirty BDI youngins? 1960s, several residents of May's landing heard horrifying screams in the night. There was no explanation for the noises. People began to panic. Police hung flyers assuring the residents that the jersey devil was a hoax but a circus owner

countered the appeal by offering a hundred thousand dollar reward for anyone who caps creature All right, get hold of that devil get your hundred grand no one received the award Then there's 1972 the Mary writes her christian sin encounter She told weird new jersey. She got the heebie jibis one night in 1972 when she spotted the Jersey devil on green tree road Christianson was driving from Blackwood to Glassboro when she said she saw a towering figure crossing The road about 25 feet behind her car She described the figure as standing taller than the average man with thick haunches like a goat and huge woolly head And she went spinner left reservoir life and mental institution

No, I don't know I added that last part 1980 Wharton State Forest Chief Ranger, Alan McFarlane, a man who normally, you know, knows his animals allegedly saw something that both grossed him out and stumped his wild animal knowledge. A brutal scene on a South Jersey farm where a pack of pigs had been killed. He reported that the backs of their heads were eaten and their bodies were scratched and torn. However, there were no tracks surrounding the bodies and no blood on the ground. Why the backs of the heads? Is that the taste? Is that the taste is part of a pig? Have we been eating the wrong part all these years? Is pig back of head bacon the most delicious form of bacon? 1993, another forest ranger, John Irwin, was driving along the Mullica River when he saw

a strange looking creature blocking the road ahead of him. He said it was about six feet tall with horns and matted black fur. The two stared each other for several minutes before the creature turned and ran into the forests. In 1977, another ranger, smooth jazz ranger, Donald Fagan couldn't give two shits about the Jersey devil, but he did care now for about St Dan to recruit Michael motherfucking McDonald for some red hot background vocals on peg. Mm-hmm, check this shit out. Yeah, it's a favorite boarin movie. You hear that angel in the background? Descented straight from heaven itself to fucking tickle your eardrums?

Yeah, that's a little stilly Dan McDonald. You didn't just get McDonald to there, you got stilly Dan't. What does that have to do with today's episode? Nothing but has everything to do with time suck. Anyway, 1981. What does that have to do with today's episode? Nothing but has everything to do with time suck anyway 1981 a young couple spotted the devil at Shin Lake and Atlantic County 1987 and in violent and aggressive German Shepherd was found torn apart His body was located 25 feet from the chain which had been hooked to the dog

Around the body was trained tracks that no one could identify But those stories are nothing compared to the original the origin origin story is a whopper of a tale. So rich, so monstrous, so over the top, so best 10 minutes of a horror movie you're embarrassed to recommend to your friends. It's fantastic. Legend has it that in 1735, a pines resident known as Mother Leeds

found herself pregnant for the 13th time. 13, the devil's number. Almost as bad as having 33 Mason kids, or having 666 devil kids. Actually, if you have 666 kids, the devil is real, and you do have something to do with it. Mother leads was married to a tiny drunk

who made few efforts to provide for his wife and 12 children, reaching the point of absolute exasperation upon learning of her 13th child, you know, she raised her hands of the heavens and proclaimed, let this one be a devil. Well, mother leads went to labor a few months later on a tumultuously stormy night, forgetting the curse she had uttered previously regarding her unborn child, probably distracted by her 12 kids and her drunk deadbeat husband. If social media had been around, she would be ending a lot of tweets,

and Instagram posts, which is hashtag FML, just fuck my life. Pregnant with 12 kids, fire and chimney just burned out. Husband, two drunk to fix it, hashtag FML. Ninth kid just broke arm. We're two days wagons ride from a doctor. Don't have wagon things to deadbeat,

piney husband, hashtag FML. Possum stew for dinner again tonight. Drunk husband not motivated enough to hunt deer. Fourth kid just pushed 11th kid off porch. Third dog just attached attacked fifth dog and killed it. 13th baby has me stuck in bed hashtag FML. Your husband and, you know, children huddled together in one room with their leads point home while local midwives gathered to deliver the baby and another.

The birth went routinely. The 13th leads child is seemingly normal baby boy for a few minutes always well as well as can be for a woman living on barren land with a drunk husband in 1735, if you're shooting a human out of her vagina for the 13th time with no anesthesia. And then all Jersey piney-held broke loose with in minutes mother leads unholy wish of months before began to come to fruition.

The baby started to change and metamorphosized right before her very eyes. Within moments, it transformed from a beautiful newborn baby into a hideous creature unlike anything the world had ever seen. The wailing infant began growing, it had incredible rate, it sprouted horns from the top of its head, and talon-like claws tore through the tips of its fingers. Leathery, bat-like wings unfurled from its back. Hair and feathers sprouted all over the child-monster's body. Its eyes began glowing bright red, as they grew larger and the monsters gnawed and stalled in face. The creature savagely attacked its own mother, killing her, and then turned its attention to the rest of the horrified

onlookers who witnessed its impentuous transformation. It flew with them clawing, biting, voicing, unearthly shrieks the entire time. It tore the midwives, limb from limb, maiming some, killing others. The monster then knocked down the door to the next room where its own father and siblings coward and fear and attacked them all, killing as many as it could. But it couldn't kill them all mostly because it had 12 siblings to mow down. That's a lot of murder, even for a Jersey devil. Those who survived, to tell the tale, then watch them horror, as the rotten beast sprinted to the chimney and flew up it, destroying it on the way and leaving a pile of rubble in its wake.

Damn you, Jersey devil! Did you really have to fuck up the chimney too? My God, was it not enough to kill most of your family? Then you, wait, you got to ruin the family chimney for the rest? You're a real asshole devil. Mom dead, drunk dead, almost dead. Most siblings dead. No fire, chimney destroyed, new little brother, real monster, hashtag FML. Well, the creature then made good on his, or you know, made it's escaping to the darkness and desolation of the pine barons and it's lived there ever since. To this day, the creature,

known as the Leeds Devil, sometimes known as the Jersey Devil. Claims the Pines for its own, terrorizes any who are unfortunate enough to encounter it. So it's crazy that this lead story is, the legend does appear to be based on a real family. Let's talk about the Leeds, okay? Talk about the origin, the slow build of the

Jersey Devil mythology. Some have surmised that the real mother leads was Deborah leads. According to genealogical records bore 12 children between 1704 and 1726. The 13th kid is not on record because it was a monster. Deborah's husband was a Jap-Hath son of Daniel. Daniel had arrived in America from England in 1677, settled in Burlington, Jersey. The association between the devil and the leads family seems to have started with Daniel son of Daniel Daniel had arrived in America from England in 1677 settled in Burlington, Jersey. The association between the devil and the leads family seems to have started with Daniel according to historian Brian Regal. In 1687 Daniel began publishing an Almanac which included

the use of astrology much to the consternation of his Quaker neighbors Quakers at the time considered astrology to be on godly called Daniel Satan's Harbinger. Uh, damn you Daniel publishing your double numbers and your satanic crop predictions. 1716 Daniel retired and handed the Almanac publishing business over to his son Titan. 1728 Titan redesigned the massed head to include the family crest. Three dragon-like creatures with clawed feet and bat-like wings.

Okay. Uh, creatures that bore a striking resemblance to the Jersey devil, so probably not the best choice. You know, and then that time to create a family crest that looks like a devil in the mid 1700s Amid high anti-British sentiment the leads family made easy marks at regal They decided with the hated Lord Cornbury the first royal governor of New Jersey More accused of somehow being in the occult when the Revolutionary War started the leads devil stood as a symbol of political ridicule and scorn Okay, so this sounds interesting. Let's deep dive into this whole leads origin story when the Revolutionary War started, the Leeds Devils stood as a symbol of political ridicule and scorn.

Okay, so this sounds interesting. Let's deep dive into this whole Leeds origin story. Settlement of New Jersey began in the 1620s as a slow trickle of just a few hearty souls, Sir George Cartaret received a land between the Hudson and Delaware rivers as a grant from the British Crown. As he hailed from the island of Jersey, an English channel in the island known for Sicilian mafia ties and Bon Joviesque hair metal bands. It became known as New Jersey, kidding, of course, about Jovi. The region was divided with the area border in New York called East Jersey and the half-border in Pennsylvania

called West Jersey. Settlers to West Jersey came initially from Holland and Sweden, not until the 1660s, the large numbers arrived, predominantly from England, members of the recently created religious order of society of friends, more commonly called Quakers. Catholics and particularly Anglicans also found their way to the region, and West Jersey Quaker communities, farms and meeting houses appeared from the Atlantic Ocean to Philadelphia, Burlington had its first meeting house built in 1683, and 1702, East Jersey and West Jersey merged into a single colony.

While the first royal governor of New Jersey, Edward High, Lord Cornbury, simultaneously served as governor of New York through 1708. Now, Cornbury is remembered as one of the most vilified and hated governors in colonial America. A portrait widely believed to be Cornbury hangs in the New York historical society shows him dressed as his aunt queen and Historians feel his political and religious rivals slandered him by spreading tales of him cross-dressing as activity You know, that was an activity far from morally acceptable in colonial America

Historical documents reveal letters written by Quaker opponents of Cornberry Accusing him of wearing women's clothes between 1707 and 1709. As Cornbury was generally and widely disliked, the accusations were accepted widely by the general public, well, when Lord Cornbury received his orders

to take charge of New Jersey, one of his original counselors, here we get back to the devil, is Daniel Leeds, one of these Leeds family. Well, Daniel Leeds hailed from Stan said Essex England. He followed his father Thomas and his brothers to the new world towards the end of the 1670s landed in Burlington, about 25 years old, devout Quaker. Daniel Leeds claimed he had ecstatic visions from the Lord as a young man. His first wife passed, you know, while still in

England. So he married his second time in 1681, his new American wife, and Stacey Dieden Burlington giving birth to a daughter named Ande, who did not survive long after the birth. He married a third time to Dorothy Young, who also passed, though not before producing eight children by 1699, and then he married a final time to Jane, Rev. Abbott Smout. Some variants on the story of the Leeds Devil, reference the name of the mother of the Jersey devil as Jane, though it is unclear if Jane leads produce any actual children. There's no contemporary sources referring to any of his wives, his mother leads.

However, her name could have been mixed up with the name of the 12 child having daughter-in-law. We mentioned earlier. In 1682, Daniel Leeds becomes a member of a local assembly. He rises to the position of survey or general. This position carries influence as land ownership disputes and boundary issues come up in the wilds of the new world a lot. As a symbol of his prosperity in religious conviction, he contributes a subscription of four pounds to build the first Burlington Quaker meeting house,

just off a high street. In the 1690s, he surveys and acquires land in the great egg harbour on the Atlantic coast, eventually handing it down to his eldest son as a family seat, which became known as Leeds Point, the area most strongly associated with the Jersey Devil. Now running to the story of the Jersey Devil is a story of the Quakers. When Daniel Leeds arrived in Burlington, Quakerism had been in its existence very longer than he had. Born of the upheavals of the English Civil Wars in 1647, a group of dissenters formed a new sect they called the Society of Friends. Because they claimed to shake with the interlite of the Lord, the name Quakers became popular. They believed in individual did not have to have a priest or a clergyman or other official

between them and God. The connection with the divine came through a relationship with Jesus. Their rejection of organized authority brought them into conflict with the forces of law and order, persecutions from without wrangling from within pushed the originally decentralized Quakers, to form a more rigid and disciplined internal structure. Persecutions also drove them to seek relief in the new world, to which they traveled in great numbers. In the 1650s, the Puritans ejected the newly arrived Quakers out of Massachusetts. So they headed to Pennsylvania and the jerseys, where they found an easier time. Now, we talked about how well the Puritans of Quakers got along in one of my favorite

time sucks, bonus episode nine, the Salem Witch Tries. So publicly and officially, Quaker, Dr. and Ren announced witchcraft and they called this foolishness, but privately many Quakers enjoyed and were titillated by ghost stories, fascinated by the supposed behavior of witches, they rejected it, but did not persecute it the way the Puritans did when witch trials broke out in Massachusetts in 1692. The Quakers were not involved. They actually barely escaped getting hanged themselves. If you'll recall from that, again, that Salem witch trial sucks.

They were about to be hanged for just promoting their theology and Puritan territory. Well, along with farming and surveying, Daniel Leeds inspires, or aspires, to more intellectual and metaphysical activity, he begins publishing an Almanac in 1687, titled, an Almanac. You know, I guess I kept it simple. I'll refer to himself as a student agriculture. Popular New England by the mid-1600s, Al Almonds appeared in the middle age, or excuse me, in the middle Atlantic region by 1682, and leads actually created the first one in New Jersey.

They were a big deal back then. They didn't have a lot of books to choose from. Didn't have a lot of magazines to the newsstand. Almonds act, that was pretty much your only option. Well, reading Almonds act supplied farmers with agricultural news, forecasts of weather, meteorological information, home spun wisdom, maybe throwing a joke or two, you know, a little bit of everything in the rural and agrarian culture of New Jersey

and Pennsylvania, where you know, few books were printed are available. Almanac proved useful, entertaining and popular and leads initially went with a single page broadside for his publication later to the more traditional Almanac model of a multi-page pamphlet. You know, an included title information based on Philadelphia, studying and rising in the sun and moon, movements of other heavenly bodies, also include inspirational words, you know, like, no man is born into himself and who, you know,

who lives unto himself, lives alone, well, leads agricultural seemingly innocuous, astrological data did not please all of his readers. Not long after its appearance, several members of the Quaker Burlington monthly meeting Complained that he used inappropriate language and that the astrological symbols for names of days and months were a little too pagan for their taste Technique common to Almanac leads make connections between star signs and various human body parts aries or art You know for the head and face he eventually included astrological medical advice as well. And again, this pissed off the Quakers. In order was sent out to collect all the copies

of the leads Almanac, non-circulation, and destroy them. Burn that devil print. The next Quaker meeting leads publicly apologized for having given offense. Privately had no intention of canceling his Almanac. It's just kind of pissed him off against some of the Quakers. Well, the year after he publishes his first Almanac leads put together a book called The Temple of Wisdom for the Little World. The Temple of Wisdom is an unconventional

book for a colonial Quaker to produce. It was a compilation of theology and also of budding scientific revolution knowledge. Rather than a completely original text, he had paraphrased an outright kind of copied large sections from other authors including Francis Bacon Put together this kind of personal you know cosmology He included sections on angels natural magic astrology theology philosophy the behavior of devils the behavior of devils was a section I love how ridiculous these assholes were what you working on father Just writing a new chapter on how devils behave my dear boy and how do devils behave father Well, they they bother their father while he's working and while they should be in bed for one thing now get to sleep young devil

Along with bacon the other source leads used extensively was the work of German Pietist Pietist I guess Pietist mystic Jacob Bome from a humble background Bome taught himself to be a philosophical Theologian claimed to have ecstatic visions of the mystical aspects of the universe. Well, Bome's writings focused on the nature of sin and redemption. He argued that the fall of man needed to occur

for him to gain entry to heaven. He saw a correspondence between zodiac signs and human conditions as love and sweetness. You know, in his writings, he argued that the mainstream Lutheranism of that day had lost its way, become dull and lifeless, had abandoned their proper zeal, strict behavior, and direct Bible study and emotion, Christianity demanded. And lead saw this guy as a kindred spirit, one who liked himself and experienced ecstatic

visions, been called before righteous authorities for his work and who rebelled against the local establishment. So defending himself and his astrological work using bones words, he says everyone that will speak of teach or teach Excuse me, everyone that will speak or teach of divine mysteries that we have the spirit of God Well the published work of Daniel leads showed him to be simultaneously a Christian occultist and purveyor of the scientific Relusion revolution. Excuse me. He was not a dark magician You know, but he you know he saw himself as a shepherd leading this flock to the light There's no evidence that he ever engaged in attempts to manipulate extraterrestrial or magical processes He was not a dark magician, but he saw himself as a shepherd leading this flock to the light.

There's no evidence that he ever engaged in attempts to manipulate extraterrestrial or magical processes. But for leads and other almanac compilers astrology was not only dubious, fringe activity, it was actually a Christian technique for getting deeper insight into the divine. This is how he saw it. Well, the Quakers did not see this the same way. And they immediately suppressed his work. The Quaker-Burlington meeting exerted growing power and control over

Quaker life in the region during this period and they were able to rally support to crush Leeds book. They demanded and obtained general conformity of their members. The suppression was so complete, only one known copy of the Temple of Wisdom is, you know, exist today. Leeds felt betrayed. His intention was both the Almanac and the Temple of Wisdom exists today. Leads felt betrayed. His intention was both the Almanac and the Temple of Wisdom is centered on bringing philosophy, theology and science to his New Jersey neighbors. And this rejection and destruction wounded him. He's broken-hearted by the religion he fully embraced,

and now he turns upon the Quakers. And this is when the devil mythology starts to build. So now he's a man who considers himself righteous and the correct type of religious type of person. And he's pissed off about how the Quakers have vilified him. He seeks influence through local politics. That's how he gets on the side of pro-British governor, Lord Cornburry, who's also anti-Quaker, also not well liked.

His role as counselor for Cornburry gets a point of that position, leads advises his new governor to not swear in several Quaker members. And you know, just a little bit of payback there. Just, you know, how you like men out Quakers. Well, the rest of the assembly complained to Cornberry about these groundless accusations against them. You know, leads to talking shit about them to no avail. Cornberry elinated the West Jersey assembly and this Quaker population through arbitrary

practices by being inconsiderate, listing the false accusations against its members. You know, not spending much time in the colony, which he was governor, just that British bastard. Well, the Quakers saw the Anglican governor, Cornberry, as a local tyrant. You know, he represented a larger empire who sought to keep them under control and who opposed their religion as heretical. You know, you don't think we have the best ideas that he did, governor, with then fuck off.

They didn't say that, but it'd be cool if he did. When Daniel Leeds is one of their own side with Cornberry and establishment, you know, they now they see him as a trader and he's done. He's he's part of the problem. You know, adding insult to injury, lead showed loyalty to his to the sovereign, you know, sovereign queen, who they were not in favor of with little diddy ending the 1713 edition of his

Almanac saying God saved Queen Anne, her foes destroy and all that's do her realms an oe. All right, so leads at least the backstanti Quaker proponents, such as George Keith, an early member of the Society of Friends, George Keith, a new founder, George Fox, William Penn, original Jersey proprietor, Robert Barclay. Keith came to Jersey in 1685, became a surveyor,

took his place as a leader of the Quaker community, he did the survey, which separated East from West Jersey, founded the town of freehold. So he's making all these friends, he's making all these friends on the Anglican side of things. And he's, you know, and, and these are also people who pissed off the Quakers and he's taken their side. And it just, you know, just deepens the rift between, you know,

between leads and the Quakers. Well, the Burlington meeting of friends, they're growing increasingly upset of what leads is doing in this 1698 meeting they refer to him as evil for his publications and other seemingly behavior. At odds with the friends, Leeds produces an outright anti-quaker book in 1699. The trumpet sounded out of the wilderness of America. He deconstructs Quakers and I read you an excerpt, but it is terribly boring. Leeds argues that Quaker theology denies the divinity of Jesus. You know, he chooses the Quakers to be an anti-monarchist.

A defensive Quaker isn't appears and Satan's hobbinger encountered being something by way of answer to Daniel Leeds, the titles back then. This is another pamphlet, you know, in 1700. Now he's now he's, he's publicly accused of either working for actually being the devil, some sort of devil. You know, this is, this is not a new type of accusation back then. Political mudsling was alive in well in Clonio America. You think the past few elections were bad back then, they would just openly declare their

opponent to be like a devil or to somebody working with the devil. And actually that kind of thing went back into the middle ages. They'd have images and everything, just depictions, illustrations of their opponent looking like a devil. Illustrations that looked a lot like, illustrations of their opponent looking like a devil. Illustrations that looked a lot like the Jersey Devil ends up looking like. The early modern era and the introduction of woodblock printing, he's a devil rendered humorous ways, is a tactic to deflate and lampoon evil. There's images of a creature with hooves, for feet, claws, for hands, leathery wings,

ponytail. That was a robust tradition. It wasn't just the Jersey Devil. Went back with political satire in europe early example that is a life in character of a strange he monster published in seventeen twenty six and which a political rival is called the scabby offspring of a scotch maggi by a scratching peddler

or uh... out of boston uh... came the monster of monsters in seventeen fifty four it was over local alcohol tax the tax the author notes uh... stands is the most hideous form and terrible aspects such as one has ever seen in America unscrupulous land grabs following the revolution resulted in the deformity of a hideous monster discovered in the province of Maine All right, so they think in like these you know monsters are popping up because of people's evil colonial New Jersey brimmed with all kinds of stories about Devils and monsters and political rivals, you know being in bed with them scandals backstabbing you know is occurring in print all over the place And Daniel leads was it right in the thick of all of that So then we have this you know we have these kind of pamphlet wars now between leads and the Quakers

It was like the 18th century equivalent of Twitter You know he's a Quaker is trying to bring me down again last another wife this this afternoon so sick of venison Hashtag FML Well leads a poser, comes in the form of Caleb Pusy, a friend of William Penn. Caleb Pusy came to Pennsylvania in 1700, opened a mill, entered local politics, became a member of the provincial Supreme Court, member of the executive cancel, kind of fancy doodah, you know, fancy titles. He attacks Daniel Leeds for supporting people, you know, that he wasn't in support of, and they go back and forth with pamph people, you know, that he wasn't in support of.

And they go back and forth with pamphlets, you know, accusing each other of this and that, and Leeds is accused and print of being Satan's harbature again, a lot of Satan accusations with Leeds. Leeds responds with a challenge to Caleb Pucy and to check his lies and forgeries. You know, he accuses him of, you know, cohabitating with prostitutes and all kinds of,

it's all those kinds of mudslings. You know, he refers to the Quakers as spiritual and carnal hordoms and adulteries or he spares, he talks about that going on with the Quakers, you know, it's getting dirty, charges him with adultery, father and children on the wedlock, cheating tradesmen, other and city as crimes. And it just goes back and forth, back and forth. And then Daniel leads, he's continuing to publish his Almanac where he has all these spiteful words about Quakers.

And he does that until 1714 when he retires from public life and then turns a business over to his son Titan. And Titan shows an aptitude for math, science, astronomy, he takes over the Almanac, he goes forth and he finds out that the leads family still has enemies. The term devil is still associated with him. And he gets into a little back and forth

with Benjamin Franklin of all people He's been been frank. There was an up and coming Philadelphia printer scientist statesman soon to be founding father He entered the Almanac game in 1732 with poor Richards Almanac riding under the name Richard Saunders He took the name from a popular London Almanac You know he starts getting into lucrative Almanac game and he starts going back and forth with his tight and lead just like a rap battle But you know way less entertaining and 1733 edition of the poor Richard Allmanac Franklin writing his Saunders uses astrological techniques to predict Titan leads death on

October 17th of that year and you know and sarcastically refers leads as his good friend and fellow student of astrology Piss his leads off, you, leads talk some shit about Franklin, you know, he's a fool and a liar. Franklin, you know, replies that it's our castly, the leads must be too well bred to use any, you know, man, so indecently and so scuriously. You know, this must not be the real Titan leads, but a manifestation from the spirit world. So he goes back into this, you know, kind of dark, you know, supernatural association between the leads and family member in the devil. And then even after the leads dies, Franklin,

into 1738, Franklin fakes the letter from leads, puts in his almanac, written by, supposedly, by leads in the afterlife, which further associates the leads family with kind of weird demonic type stuff. And Franklin was a real asshole to leads. And but in the end, his play worked. People remember, poor Richard Almanac, he talked better shit and his Almanac flourished and is

remembered. And the leads Almanac is completely gone. And the traditionally believed period of the birth of the Jersey devil does coincide roughly with the death of Titan Leads, as well as the time of the Franklin Leads Almanac war. So coincidence, maybe, maybe not. All right, so there's all this stuff going on. So starting as the Leeds, the elements that came together to form the Jersey Devil Mythos, percolated and fermented over the next century in the culture of the Pine Barons.

You had this devil association with Daniel and then with Titan, and then these pamphlets being thrown around, and then you have all that happening in this Pine Barrens area where people are not the most literate and the most educated and you know, and superstitions start going and you know,

people are telling their kids that there's a Jersey devil and you know, it becomes this weird kind of old wives tale. Is what some historians think happened? Is how this stuff, you know, got going. And then you know, years later, you know, starting like, you know starting like certain newspaper articles, like 1905, now the leads family, the history of the real leads families

reduced to just like Captain Leeds and his cult leaning wife, Mother Leeds. And the actual history of that family just gets further and further diminished. And their name just becomes associated with this crazy devil story. And then in 1909, this guy Charles A. Brandenburg, the owner of the ninth and Art Street Die Museum

in Philadelphia, and his press agent Norman Jeffries, they see an opportunity to cash in on suddenly some monster footprint sightings that happened in 1909. And there, you know, they're eager for any outlandish scheme to kind of bring paying customers into their museum. And they begin to plant stories around the area about the Leeds Devil and its sinister behavior in local newspapers, just lies, paying other people to lie.

These early January 1909 press releases are read by an eager public, already interested in these reports of these snowy footprints that maybe they even did, or maybe they're doing more of them, who knows. And the newspaper accounts, the Jersey devil is a product of media, rather than folklore at this point, begins really burthing the mythology of this monster. The Trenton evening news, exclaimed on his front page that the leads devil has the Jersey people frightened. The scheme has the desired effect, attendance of that guy's museum just grows, the New

York Tribune declares, if anybody doubted the stories of the tracks, to the snow, they have now been confirmed. Snidegat legitimate, you know, media places confirming this complete nonsense. And now this thing is firmly implanted in the collective memory of the Pine Barans. Isn't that fascinating? Like a slight, and a publication here, an association there, more similar slides and slanders,

a generation later, all beating the same drum, it reminds me of Pizzagate. You just keep beating the same drum. In this case, it's that the Leeds family are anti-quaker devils, and you just kind of beat it into the collective consciousness of an area. You know, and the stigma sticks for generations, and then some carnival barker type promoter, you know, really beats the lead devil, drum in 1909, pushing up attendance into his museum of curiosities,

and that firmly cements the legend, the minds of the public for over a century and counting. Now, I have no proof that this is how the Jersey Devil legend came to be, but it does feel right to me, right? I do get how this kind of mythology can grow. I think we all could think of like similar examples in our own kind of little worlds.

Like there was a family where I grew up, the Damans. And they have a reputation where I grew up of being a family of delinquents. Parli earned for sure, for sure. They have some felons in the family. They have some perfectly able-bodied men and women who seem all too content to just kind of live up public assistance.

However, there have also been some wonderful family members, star athletes, amazing students, wonderful people. But the overall reputation for this one family, going at least as far back as my great grandparents and possibly further, you know, right or wrong is that they're a bunch of narrow-do-wells. You know, the name Damon, where I grew up, does not have a positive association stuck with it in most people's minds. You know, if you were to tell somebody that some Damon got into this trouble or that trouble, you know, most of the time there would just be this general reaction of like, well, you know, that figures.

You know, there's rumors about me. There was rumors in high school that I was gay. The only gay thing I did was not have girlfriends. I was awkward. I was not good with girls. I didn't have any balls. I had low self-esteem. Zero confidence, you know, with women.

You know, what a love to be in a hit with the ladies, but it wasn't the case. Oh, and I didn't get shit faced out in the woods with guys from high school in the weekends. And I didn't do that because I had a crazy stepmom who was constantly grounded me, and I just didn't want to. But this combination of being not doing

the typical bro shit of the area, you know, getting fucked up on a Saturday night, talking about girls, and also not having a girlfriend was enough for, you know, a fair amount of people just to think that I was gay for sure. And if I suddenly announced myself as gay today, you know, I was like, if I left my wife and just checked up with the dude, there would be a certain segment of the population where I grew up who would think for sure, just,

I knew it. I knew it. I fucking knew it. Well, with the leads, starting with Daniel, it was this imagery of smearing your political rival, you know, by describing them as some kind of devilish beast, same kind of beast that showed up in pamphlets about other people, you know, unfortunately, they also had that for their family crest, you know, and it's, it's in people's minds, it's been in people's minds for generations, imagery, you know, unfortunately, they all started that for their family crest. You know, and it's, it's in people's minds, it's been in people's minds for generations. This imagery, you know, people reached an immigrants from Europe, would've seen it over there. And you just keep adding this devilish association,

it's one family, and pretty soon it sticks, you know, and then for, you know, a lot of people, a lot of Quaker families and friends of Quaker families, you know, they hear leads and they're like, oh yeah, the devils, right? Aren't they, the fucking devils, right? Didn't that one guy have a devil baby or something? I mean, it's just like, it's just like becomes real for people.

And then you get these kind of backward 18th and 19th century pines, you know, by all accounts I read, you know, barely literate, very superstitious kind of hill folk. And then now they're repeating these half-baked memories of the devils and pretty soon all the original political meaning is lost. And it's just a term remaining, just a leads devil and a picture in people's minds.

Just a picture from those old campaigns, the picture from the old family crest, just, you know, hooves and bat wings and horns and fangs. And now it's a fucking real monster. Now it's a campfire tale, told by Imagine Two Fathers to scare their kids, you know, keep from misbehaving. Just go to bed before the leads devil gets you. And then people start seeing what they want to see. They start seeing a real monster in the museum owners' sdars, you know, making hoof prints. And this, no, I bet he fucking started that. Working up some public hysteria, getting people to buy

some tickets to a shitty curiosity museum. You know, and then once one person convinces a community that they've seen something, everyone starts seeing it. It's like in that bonus episode too, Time Suck. The alien extravaganza episode. Right after 1947, when amateur pilot Kenneth Arnold claimed he saw nine crescent-shaped objects in the sky, UFOs flying near Mount Rainier in Washington,

then his story gets published all of a sudden everybody starts seeing UFOs. Right, now did an unusual amount of UFOs come to Earth in 1947? Maybe, or maybe a lot of people's imaginations suddenly got the best of them. Right, I haven't noticed any weird shadows at night in the past few weeks But I've already did the shadow people episode. I saw about your fucking creepy shadow people in my head You know, I thought for sure one night. I saw a pair of red eyes in the basement 99% sure those are lights from a TV

And now that I'm thinking about shadow people again I'm probably gonna see those fucking eyes again breaking scare myself Imaginations are powerful powerful powerful things But that's just what I think about the Jersey Devil, and what I think is not always entertaining or fun. But you know what is, always entertaining and fun? What's the idiots of the internet thing? Idiots, I'll be intro, that, intro, that.

Here's a typical Jersey Devil post I found under a weird new jersey.com article on the Jersey Devil. double post I found under a weird new jersey.com article on the jersey devil. This is from Denise. It's like a Facebook user Denise 08611. Denise says, this is a true story. And the New Jersey State police were even involved with this matter. It was a summer of 2009. My ex and I went out to the Pine Barons in the middle of the night to fire a newly purchased gun. We got there about 2 a.m. and rightam and right about 3am we started to hear loud screeching noises, more or less like a hawk but a lot louder. We decided to leave and head home, something just didn't feel right.

I had that strange feeling in the pit of my stomach. As soon as we started to head back to my car, we then heard a loud flapping noise. The tree tops were swaying back and forth, but there was no wind. Now I'm really scared. We got back to the car to head home and I realized that my cell phone was not where I left it on the middle hand rest. Well, we looked and looked and looked. I knew I left my phone there as I always do. I thought it might have fell off my lap under the ground so we proceeded to look around the outside of the car, nothing there. As I was standing on the driver's side of the car with the door open, and he was on the passenger side,

doing the same all of a sudden, my cell phone came flying past my face, like a bullet from behind, smashed into the roof of my car, slid across to my ex on the passenger side. We both looked at each other, started to scream, and jumped into the car. At the time, I had a Chrysler, 300M, and we all know I really had no business driving

that car through the woods, but I put the car in the drive. And I flew down the path at 50 to 70 miles per hour. My car was bouncing all around, I didn't care. All I know is I wanted to get away from whatever was out there as fast I could. I am going to admit, I have never been more scared of my life. I literally peed my pants. We were both crying, screaming and confused. I had to stop the car because I actually couldn't breathe.

I was in full panic mode. We decided to pull over and switch seats so he can drive. As we stopped the car and switched seats, we heard the loud flapping and screeching again, but this time it was right about us. I'm guessing above us. We heard birds chirping loudly as if they were warning the other birds of something. We finally got under the 206 and we couldn't drive any faster. We were driving so fast.

Does the state police pull this over? We were in such a panic that the police thought my ex was trying to kidnap me or something. We explained to them what had happened. What we heard and saw, we showed the officer my cell phone that would smash the pieces. The officers had that looks as if the phone had hit me in the head. I probably would have been knocked unconscious. The officers shared almost the same story with us as far as the screeching and flapping noise and uneasy feeling, I grew up in Clementine. All I know, the Pine Barons, all I knew, the Pine Bar, she's trying to say I know the Pine Barons like the back of my hand.

I've been there numerous times and have never experienced anything like I did that night. I will never, ever return to the Pine Barons again. All right, well, I looked up Denise Facebook profile and no Facebook account anymore. Nope, no longer have a Facebook account. Guessing they are probably still full of shit. What? I love it when people are like, this is a true story.

You can coordinate it, you know, corroborate it with the New Jersey Police Department. And then just, you know, no officer name, no department name, no date, you know, corroborate it with the New Jersey Police Department. And then just, you know, no officer name, no department name, no date, no info, other own to contact them and get any further info. Just not a, you know, it's a true story, guys. You don't just take my word for it. This guy George was also there.

Look him up if you don't believe me. He's on the internet, name of George. Probably a dude. Last name starts with a letter. You should be easy to find. And why the hell were you going to shoot a new gun at two in the morning? That is not a common time for target practice,

unless you're on meth. I'm guessing it probably sounds like a perfectly reasonable thing to do. Just fuck man, we've already drank our beer, we've got a last call. We already don't want to go back to my place. I got more beer, I got more meth. We can shoot my new gun.

Oh man, I like the first two parts of that plan. How about this though? How about we grab some beers, we grab some meth, and then we take your gun into the woods to shoot it so we don't get the pleas involved. Fuck yeah, Darryl, you are a goddamn genius. Well, despite, you know, this good setup being out in the Pine Barrens round,

you know, three in the morning with the gun Your story sucks Denise What you hear birds chirping gets windy Whoever you're with I think what it would happen is whoever you were with through their phone at you And then didn't want to mess up to it and then they broke it you guys were fucking high on something or you probably or you just made up the whole thing Like why how if you're speeding talking about this fucking crazy Monster possibility out in the woods where you were shooting your gun at whole thing. Like, how if you're speeding talking about this fucking crazy monster possibility out in the woods where you were shooting your gun at three in the morning, how did you not go to jail when you get pulled over? How do you not go to

jail for D.Y. or something? I don't know. Next story. So much Jersey devil stuff is like that. No actual creature spotted, no real encounter of any kind. Just someone with, you know, bullshit and they're getting spooked in the woods and blaming the feeling of being spooked on the name they've heard the Jersey devil. Wonder YouTube video called Does the Jersey Devil really exist? I found the following comment, and I like what led me. User, IAA, 015 states, search for Jersey Devil Thermal Footage. It's actually very interesting as you can see wings,

also radiating heat as a regular mammal. I'm not sure why that's interesting, but okay, user, IAA,015, I did as you instructed, I searched for thermal footage, I googled Jersey Devil Thermal Footage and made it to a Jersey Devil article on ghost theory.com, you know, totally legit website. The article is titled Paranormal States Jersey Devil, Dear Devil or Hoax. And it features alleged thermal imaging photos of what appears to be a picture of a children's toy.

Something about the same size and shape of a my little pony figurine. And about a scary, is a my little pony doll. It's a filtered version of a pick I've seen many times before in the web. There is a shitty Jersey Devil pick that keeps popping up on the web. It's from this alleged sighting video

that even made its way into ABC News, this dude named David Black, who appears to be 100% wacky doodle, claims that in 2015, on the way home from work, driving through the Pine Barrens around 6 p.m., he saw what he first thought was a llama, and then the creature sprouted wings and just flew over the road. And he has a picture capturing it in mid-flight,

and it's fucking terrible. It's like it's laughably terrible. It looks like a my little pony that he altered a bit, he then glued it to his windshield and took a shitty photo of it. But it has become the Jersey Devil equivalent of that fuzzy Patterson Gimlin photo of Bigfoot we've all seen of that thing, you know, with one arm in front and one arm behind, you know, walking through the California woods. Well, in the comments, bloodless article, an article that comes to no real conclusions about anything, there is itty gold and some witty hilarity as well. Facebook user M81 shits on all the cryptic, uh, cryptic speculative fun posting.

I have two unicorns of Pegasus and a Jersey devil living with me. They are my pets. I love this mostly because it feels like something I would also write. Uh, well played, you sarcastic asshole. Facebook user, the survivor is one of my favorite types of internet, the truth demander. They post, why has the story been turned into an actual documentary and showed to people? I think we deserve to see the truth. I love that. As if the government has some vested interest in hiding the real truth of the jersey devil for us right like like like there's finally going to be a press conference all right everybody okay everybody uh... jigs up

jersey devil is real uh... we didn't want to scare the public so we've been hiding the truth there is a horned llama like bat wing demon on the loose and the pine barons of jersey and there has been for over two hundred years at least uh... we can't catch it can't stop it it's a real murderous asshole so you know and there has been for over 200 years at least. We can't catch it, we can't stop it. It's a real murderous asshole. So, you know, careful hiking and whatnot. Okay, another news, the new corporate tax reduction is now effective and we're proud to announce it.

Like, what the fuck are you talking about? There's no reason to hide it. Then there's another one of my favorite internet archetypes, the cocky idiot who thinks they are a high-falutin intellectual. User Einstein underscore incarnate. That is like the cockiest user name ever. Posts. Some of you guys are blind and lead dumb.

Let me school you. Only 4% of the world's rainforests have been explored. 4%. That's roughly the size of America minus Alaska. That's like exploring Rhode Island when something only lives in California and claiming it proven fake. Better yet, less than 1% of the world's oceans have been explored. That's equal to walking down Main Street in small town Iowa and saying hippos don't exist.

Feel free to apply that alien life. Statistics would prove that more than 50% of you believe in God. Haha. Good luck proving that. Alright, first off, Einstein, he who made love to his first cousin, pass it on. First off, why did you be dick about religion at the end? What does it have to do with anything else you were talking about? You seem to be building a case to believe in the paranormal based on a lot of the world not being explored. You seem to be building a case that we should logically believe in things we have not seen, such as, you know, cryptoids or cryptids and aliens, you know, because there is so much we have an explored, right? That's what you're trying to do with your flawed statistical arguments, but then you just randomly slam faced with, with, with, with, yeah, faith, excuse me,

which doesn't really flow with your argument. I think what you're trying to say is that if you are open to believing in God, something you can't scientifically prove, which a lot of people do believe in, you should also be open to believing in cryptids. You know, because just like we have an explored every realm and dimension of space, time, and the universe

where God may be, we have an explored every inch of the earth where cryptids may be. Alright, fair enough. But if you're going to open with a rant of let me school you, then you've got to come correct with a better argument and proper logic. Now let's get into those stats you build your case with. Thanks for providing no sources for all of your specific numbers. You claim we've explored less than 1% of the world's oceans, not true. According to the National Ocean Service,

the branch of the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, according to scientists, paid to study the ocean, almost 5% of the world's oceans have been explored. So while we still have a lot to explore, you were off by over five times, and you're kind of cocky analysis. And what about your only 4% of the world's rainforest

have been explored claim? I'm 100% sure you pulled that out of your ass because there is no conclusive statistic regarding rainforest exploration, not for the whole world. Oh, and according to the latest Gallup poll from 2016, 89% of people believe in God, which a genius like you should know is a much bigger number than roughly 50%.

And according to a 2002 global religious Landscape analysis of more than 2500 senses surveys population registers quoted in the Washington Times 84% of the world's population believes in God still much bigger number than 50% You seem to be at least 34% off in your argument I doubt I'm signed was ever more than a third off in any mathematical argument he ever had Turns out you are blindingly dumb. They're Einstein incarnate. Do you even know what incarnate means?

It's deity or spirit and body in the flesh. If Einstein had taken over your body, you'd be way, way better at statistics. Statistics being 100% relying on numbers. Einstein being 100% super duper good at numbers. 100% of his entire life. So Einstein underscored underscore and carnit, an arrogant dumb dumb. Pass it on.

And then under the same article, user Sephoni, Feshwani, post my favorite comment of today with, I'm not saying it's real or anything, but it could have been a Pegasus. I fucking love this so much. Hey guys, I'm not gonna say that this creature is real or not, but I do think rationally, we should consider

the very real possibility that it is a Pegasus. All right, I mean, I look, I get it. You know, Jersey Devil may not be real. Good chance though, it's an ancient Greek mythological winged stallion. Just a fool for thought. Now if you'll excuse me, I am late for an important lunch meeting with Einstein and Carnate.

We are finalizing the details on our GoFundMe campaign to raise money to open a think tank. Okay. I think that it's quite enough idiots of the internet for today. It is. I'll be into that. Okay, you guys. So that's about it for the Jersey devil. Quick note, just a random aside. The notes that are attached to these episodes are on the app. Like today's notes, tons of typos. I just want you to know that I am aware of those. I have to fucking crank these things out so fast. I am typing as fast as I can pause with time. And it's just for all it was for is for my notes, just for me to look through it. And then kind of just because you guys wanted to, I decided to, or wanted them some of you,

just for transparency and stuff. Also, I wanted to put the notes on there, but I make no claims that these are like well written documents. Yeah, it doesn't make sense for me to kind of go back and like, you know, really scrutinize and get them all kind of perfect because they were never intended to be produced

as like a written document. I just wanted to say that, because now that they're on it, I keep forgetting to say that. But anyway, back to Jersey Devil. Gotta say, it feels like 100% nonsense. Unlike Mossman or Bigfoot, no one can even agree on how it looks. To me, it just seems to be a legend where political rivalry and stories of devil accusations were filtered through over a hundred years of superstitions, pine culture. And then a curiosity museum operators really stoked to flames big time. Probably planted some fake hoof prints, tried to sell some tickets, now we got a legend.

You know, either that or evil incarnate lives in the woods of Jersey. Who knows? It's not like I've hiked around looking for the monster. I have been to Jersey several times and it is a pretty strange place, you know, here and there. Anyway, time for some top five takeaways. Time, suck, top five takeaways. Number one, the Jersey Devil may not be real, but it does have one hell of an origin tale.

The 13th baby of mother leads, metamorphosing, and is some demonic monster with bat wings, horns, talons, eating its own mother. New baby growing up fast, just sprouted bat wings, horns, talons, eating its own mother. New baby growing up fast, just sprouted bat wings, horns. Looking at me now, like it literally wants to eat me. Drunk, piny husband doesn't seem to care. Hashtag FML. Number two, don't mess with the Quakers. They'll tarnish your family name for centuries.

Number three, the famous Napoleon never saw the Jersey devil, but his brother claimed to. Even some Europe conquering emperors have wacky brothers. You know, wacky family members, not just for Pines. Number four, the people of New Jersey thought so little of the Pine Barren's brethren that they wanted them sterilized. Who knew that the old cast of the Jersey Shore

were not the trashiest people Jersey had to offer? I hope I make it out there someday. I would love to hit some sketchy diners and shake some Pinyy hands. Right, I bet they make a mean meat loaf down there. Love me some hillbillies. You know, even with their flatlander piney hillbillies Just oh well look at me here now got some puke Tissue's puke I ever did look at my woman's beard. Well look at me now with the full belly I made a butt baby with the woman on mine and the governor's wallet we got whoo. Yeah And number five new info

Nothing The governor's wallet wig got woo yeah! Number five, new info, nothing. There is no new info in the Jersey Devil. You really have heard all the best parts. This monster highly doubtful it exists. A website I seem to frequent now, live science.com sums it up best. Saying, could this creature be real? The Jersey Devil's diverse features are strong evidence that it does not and cannot exist as a real animal.

The most obvious, biologically implausible feature is its wings. They would need to be much bigger and anchored in a much more massive musculoskeletal structure to lift the animal's body weight into the air. Birds and bats can fly, their bodies are relatively lightweight, they are reputed heavy muscles and thick limbs of the Jersey Devil would never work. You'd have better luck putting butterfly wings on a rhino. Most images of the Jersey Devil look like a monster that a high school dungeon and dragons player might dream up as a composite of different unrelated animals whose features could never

actually exist in the same animal, but look weird and scary. So what's the explanation for the Jersey Devil? There is very little to explain. We have a monster whose origin is obviously rooted myth and whose features are anatomically impossible. Time suck tough, right takeaway! So that's it, that's the Jersey Devil. If you do a quick Google image search, the description of a monster conjured up by a high school Dungeons and Dragons player. Perfect. I used to doodle. I used to draw shit like the Jersey Devil when I played Dungeons and Dragons in high school. You know, just, oh, let's see here. I've got to give it the head of a demon with the wings of a bat, a body of a goat, maybe a horse kind of a deal. Let's make the arm muscles bigger. Maybe make the talons

longer. Little more fangs All right time for some more tour dates. I mean Houston and Dallas Those cities have been added to my tour this year I'm calling it the flat earth tour getting a little poster made and stuff to bring out to shows and some Some t-shirts to sell just to show some some flat earth tour shirts I'll be the secret group theater in Houston Friday April 13th And then I'll be the Texas theater in in Houston, Friday, April 13th. And then I'll be the Texas theater in Dallas Saturday, April 14th, only one showing Dallas, only one showing Houston in 2018. More tour dates recently added to dayincomers.tv. So click the

tour link on there and check it out. Now, I hope you come and see some shows. Man, they've been my favorite shows ever the last few months. Had a great meeting with app designers for time suck and the coming space lizard feachings are looking fucking cool as shit. Sorry to have any Patreon info quite yet for you today. Coming very, very soon, I'm actually meeting with them again about that this week. Thanks for buying tees and hoodies and hats

and more of the TimeSuck store, all at TimeSuckpodcast.com and on the app. I finally got my own box of the new Danger Brain stuff and it's fucking awesome. They're so good at what they do. The colors are so rich and fantastic. The design is so solid. If you want to work with those guys, I highly recommend them, the Danger Brain.com. Sometimes suckers are working with them right now, which I'm very happy about. It's all done with discharge ink, these new shirts. The ink is in the fabric and the belly tribal

lines just don't work as well for that. So that's why they want with the next level shirts and hoodies and next level just so you know, does fit differently than the first four generations of the T-shirt. For me, it's more of a true size now that I've worn it. All right, sorry, it took me so long to get them. You know, it's maybe even a tiny bit big, actually, where the Bella's run a little small for me. So, like I'm wearing a large zip up

cold to the curious hoodie right now, and it's plenty big. And sometimes I wear an extra large hoodie. Also, the zip up hoodie is a light hoodie, which I'm wearing a large zip up cold to the curious hoodie right now and it's plenty big and sometimes I wear an extra large hoodie. Also the zip up hoodie is a light hoodie which I like. It is not a, I'm gonna wear this out in 20 degree weather and feel great winter hoodie. The space lizard pullover hoodie, much more substantial, much thicker, it's much more of a, let's get warm and cozy deal. So just to pass that along. Thanks to Sydney Shies for killing on social media, Harmony Velocamp for all her kick ass, positive energy help on social media as well,

with her secret space lizards handles. And thanks to Jesse Doberner for the kick ass editing work. Quick note on topics, suggestion emails. Be sure you correctly type your email in the appropriate spot when you send it in. So we can get it back to you. If not, we send a reply to a dead address. So maybe just copy and paste or double check the spelling.

We get a few messages every week that we're unable to reply to. And that's the one you know, send in from the directly from the little comment section or kind of contact a section on the app in the website. Big thanks to Rebecca, Reba Lilly, Bojangles Research Intern, Jersey Native, for helping with the research on this episode. I thought she did a great job. Got me pointed a lot of good directions,

gave me a lot of good content to go through. She's putting a lot of hard work, and I appreciate it also thanks to all of you who recommended this suck, Alan Howe, William Nannyz, Alexander Winkler, Austin Steers, Seth Knoe, anyone else I missed? Thanks to all of you who write and listen, spread the word by merch, come to shows, click the Amazon link on timesockpodcast.com, support the show while you shop. Thanks to all of you who spread the word to your friends and family who write and review

the show everywhere you listen. That's so important, man. It builds a suck up, makes the show possible. It shows over 2400 reviews on iTunes now, which is incredible to me that's happened this fast. If you want to be part of the next Friday bonus suck vote, by the way, to determine the next bonus suck topic, which will drop January 26th,

please follow the show on Instagram. That's the easiest place to tally the votes. That's at time suck podcast on Instagram. And we also have at times suck podcast on Twitter and Facebook, you know, please follow us there and like us there just to show as you care. All of that helps, you know, me get bookings and everything. I mean, the more social media I have, the easier it is to get to more cities, to convince places, to book me and bring me in, you know, every follow and like I get every, it all helps so, so much.

So please do it anywhere, do it everywhere. And again, it's like how Yelporks are a restaurant. Someone's looking for a new podcast, they're going to be a new fan of something, they look at the reviews. So you're actively helping my career when you do that. And then regarding the contest, I spoke about last week for the Get Together

for the Elite Space Lizard event. As shown on the App Secret Space Lizard on Instagram, we are announcing the last contest invite now. And it's gonna be, you know, Cordelaine Idaho Time Suck, Headquarters in the Suck Dungeon, where it's gonna be private, you know, small gathering of space lizards. Sorry we couldn't open up to more people,

I didn't talk about it much in the podcast. I let Harmony, you know, do that because I didn't wanna open it up to too many people because there's not that many spots. It's very limited space right now. It's going to be very little intimate gathering. We will do more down the road ways down and we'll figure out how to get more people involved. So anyway, the winner of the last 2018 Space Lizard Elite event invitation is Grant Shepherd. So congratulations

to from everyone on the time suck team and Grant's favorite episode is From everyone on the time suck team and Grant's favorite episode is Sasquatch for versus Loch Ness. He says it's one of my favorite episodes. Gotta love the wacky doodles and so much idiot gold Well, Grant. I hope you love today's Jersey devil episode Grant's entry says to the great oracle of Sir Dr. Reverend Dan Suckmaster Cummins or whomever it mayest concernist I love that here that. Here this, I've been a Dan Fandstance Bojangles with just a pissed off bad asshole, Pupper.

I discovered the suck while listening to some classic Dan Santa upon Pandora. Time so quickly became my first favorite podcast. Great escape from me from a job. I hated and felt stuck in long story short. I quit that job. Move back home to my super small, real quirky hometown of Santa Claus, Indiana,

where I gathered all the info necessary to solve the most epic Christmas conspiracy, Damage-Jingle-Jangle. Time-Suck then became a great way for me and my dad to connect when I was at home. I introduced him to the suck. I was so happy that he immediately went full space lizard. We often spend time together now driving around the truck laughing at episodes and making references to Nimrod and Michael mother fucking McDonald's the confused. The hell out of my mother. That's great. Being such a space lizard to me means having a special bond with a bunch of curious weirdos. Yep. You can come together to discuss wacky little topics, express themselves, and learn from

each other. Tell Dennis and thanks. Again, for reading my insane, dear love, pass email. It really encouraged me to pick back up my interest in writing a comedy. Hope he reads this one. Did it really fucking cool to meet him and hang out with his spade? What's gonna happen? It is gonna be cool. Grant Shepard, Hail Nimrat. Grant, you suck so hard. You're gonna be receiving your official personal invitation via email shortly from our events coordinator

Harmony. Thank you so much for the jingle and jingle story again. I heavily loved by our suckers. It was even illustrated by Harmony on the secret space lizard on Instagram for the holidays. Keep up to creative flow. Most of all, keep on sucking. Next week, Stalin, back to Russia, we go. Will Chikotilo pop up, you know? I know you missed him this week. I feel like there's a decent chance he's gonna make a cameo.

Stalin ruled the Soviet Union, Joseph Stalin with an iron fist for three decades. Right in the early 20th century, some historians hold him accountable for the deaths of roughly 25 million people. His policy created famine, his gulags, unjustly imprisoned millions, 20th century, some historians hold him accountable for the deaths of roughly 25 million people. His policy created famine, his gulags unjustly imprisoned millions, his subordinates executed hundreds of thousands of Russians on his behalf.

You know, because of his policies, he intensified an already existing culture of paranoia and blind loyalty. He also left a legacy with many as a champion of the working man. You know, he grew mother Russia from a peasant society into a legitimate world power, both militarily and industrially. He helped the allies defeat the Nazis and then he was on the opposite side of the allies during the arms race of the Cold War. So love him or hate him. He is one of the most significant historical figures of the 20th century. And I'm going to suck the shit out of him next week. Now it's time for some time sucker updates.

Rupdate? Get your time sucker updates. Okay, first up this made my entire week. Holy shit, is this a cool update from sucker Kelsey Brisbane? So here's what Kelsey says. She says, so I emailed you the other day thinking for the weekly suck. Now I have even more reason to say thanks. Today I was on my way to work when I hit a patch of ice. I then attempted to keep my car in its lane.

I failed. I drove into oncoming traffic. Thankfully, no one was hurt, no vehicles damage, but all parties were a little shaken up. We got out of our vehicles to make sure everyone was okay than went on our way more cautiously. Shortly thereafter, I was pulled over because I had forgotten to turn off, turn my headlights back on

After the incident I pulled over and grabbed my ID and insurance for my wallet and after a short exchange I handed my documents over. I hadn't noticed at the time. I was still had free mason's episode to play in on my radio The officer took my documents went back to his car to do whatever it is they do back there then returned to my window This is fucking amazing to me while handing me back my documents, he said, Hail Nimrod and simply walked back to his vehicle, holy shit! He drove off before, I can even realize what was happening by I'm pretty sure the time suck got me out of a ticket today, so thank you, I am forever a sucker and as he said, Hail Nimrod, thanks for the free pass, holy shit, that makes me so happy.

Thanks for sharing that Kelsey. It is like an adrenaline shot straight into my time suck heart. Whoever you are officer friendly, Hale Nimrod to you as well. Man, shout out to all the police officer listeners, by the way, just police officers in general, still keeping our citizens safe

despite massive media scrutiny, you know, and a starting wage in some areas that should be criminal few bad apples really tainted the national view of many of people towards officers you know are there some racist officers has there been you know of course there has been you know racism with officers for sure the race of the general public for sure

uh... have there been officers who abused their power yes of course just like there is with the general public there human beings human beings or reflection of the culture they live in. Of course, they're flawed. Also, a lot of fucking heroes out there putting their lives on the line day in and day out, hail fucking Nimrod to our nation's officers. Okay, so next in an oak island update, this comes in from time suck and mother sucker, Sether who writes suck master of the sorted squal of stupid simians of simulated space. Nice. Seth killing it with a iteration game. So about Oak Island, a friend sent me this and there's a link here that'll be in the episode notes. It details how using logic and science they believe they figured out what really happened to some extent. At Oak Island apparently it might be a Viking long ship that more up to her in a storm

subsequently fell into a sinkhole. A sinkhole at a nearly vertical angle. There's some YouTube videos linked in there. Makes a lot of sense, or makes a lot more sense than pirate booty to me, anyways, keep sucking. Seth. Well Seth, I watched the video, and it's a very interesting theory. There are sinkholes on the island that is a fact. The underbelly of the island is a natural labyrinth of limestone, tunnels, and caves. Viking ships could float in shallow water. High tide could possibly theoretically take a ship close to where they found the, you know, the island treasure pit.

You know, they could have Vikings could have carried the ship on the land. A sinkhole could have opened up and the ship could have fallen in it, much like cars and homes have fallen into Florida sinkholes that we have videos and pictures of, far-fetched? Yes, a little. But like Seth said, it does make more sense, or I think at least as much sense as pirate booty. And if it did happen, what a shitty day for those Vikings. You know, you can imagine that if it did happen.

And again, I am admitting that it is a little far-fetched like everything else, but I think it's interesting enough to talk about today. But can you imagine, you finally get off the water, you finally get the boat out, finally think you're safe on the land, and then you essentially get swallowed up and you drown on land. Ah, man, whoever lived through that, if it happened, they were pissed at Thor or whatever Norse God they were praying to that day.

Freemason update from Joshua Russell Dearser, Mother Sucker, after listening to your Freeman's podcast, I started to seriously look into joining. However, every Freemasons Lodge website in the Freemasons of California site, list that a requirement for joining is a belief in a monotheistic religion. I haven't seen this question anywhere online. I'm hoping you can help. Can someone just bullshit to weigh into the Freemasons by just saying they believe in God? I'm curious to hear your thoughts on this. Thanks.

My girlfriend and I are looking forward to visiting you in San Francisco, seeing some shows there. Yes, Josh, 100% you can lie about it. If you're okay with that, if you're okay with just, you know, just to get past the admission process, just say, sure, yeah, no, I'm a Jewish or a Christian or, you know, Muslim, whatever. Or you don't have to do that.

You can just say agnostic. If you're cool, saying agnostic on a piece of paper, you can get in because from what I understand talking other mason's that shit will never come up once You're in there right? It's not a you know, and then you can just you know network and we'll do whatever you want All right, so that's that's the answer I have for that This in from another sucker from another mother Anthony Engelman Hi, Dan. I'm a'm a relatively new convert to the suck having linked him from your Pandora ad. How I originally found you, you started listening to your standup.

I now have the time suck app, yes! I'm using my weekly commute to and from the airport to get caught up, one podcast at a time. It's a veritable day loose of alternative media, oh, in the, excuse me, in the veritable deluge, day loose of alternative media sources available online is been refreshing to find a community of people, dedicated to finding truth and genuinely seeking real knowledge as opposed to simply checking the box on whatever personally validated, polarized ideology

suits them on any given day. On more than one occasion, I've had to stop and reevaluate what I actually believe in and why and in several cases been forced to alter my opinion and light of either complete information or on the alternative opinion I had not given proper thought. I believe being open minded enough to actually have a real conversation about traditionally volatile topics and being willing to have your opinion change are both rare commodities in news, social media, or entertainment.

I've still been upon all that and more in this podcast and working diligently now to help spread the suck. Fuck yeah, love it Anthony. All hail Reverend Doctor. You've helped make me a better person in Best regards, Anthony. Angham will thank you, Anthony. That was Reverend Doctor. You've helped make me a better person, best regards, Anthony. And then well thank you Anthony. That was very nice. Thank you very much.

And your update leads me into a teaser for next week's update. Originally I was gonna share a big update from SuperSucker, Jessica Dowd, because this podcast also makes me rethink things very often. But we're still going back and forth. So I need to let it simmer, some more in my brain, Crockpot. Basically,, time, sucker Jessica Dowd and I have been emailing back

and forth regarding the fraternal aspect of the free mason's. Too much info to list all of our exchanges, but you know, essentially Jessica was disappointed in my endorsement of the free mason's right, excuse me, to have a men's only organization because as a chemical engineer, she works in a male dominated field already and the networking opportunities with free masons could be very beneficial to her career. Beneficial and ways that may go into a meeting of the mocomoms, to use the all female group I referenced the other week, would not compare to. Essentially in a patriarchal society where men historically have a hell of all the power, a group like the masons kind of helps keep that power in the hands of men because there is not currently

a female equivalent group. So again, we've been going back and forth having a very positive discussion about balancing freedom. The freedom to do what you want with your group, which I definitely believe in, especially as a more of a libertarian type person, I believe people should be able to do what they want to do as long as they're not harming others.

But how do we balance that with equal opportunity without opportunity without creating power and balances? It's complicated. It's complicated. Fantastic, challenging, hard issue. Exactly what TimeSuck should be, and I'm glad we're still discussing it, and I'll share more about it next week. Next time, suckers. I need a net. We all did. Alright, so that's it for today. Thanks for listening to our time, everybody. I have a great week. I hope to see some of you this week in Providence that wrote Island Comedy Connection and be careful in Jersey. Watch out for the devil if you're in the Pine Barrens and really watch out for one of those tricks he pines. Alright? Oh look at that puke, looking at her face! Best puke I ever did, lick!

Keep on sucking. you